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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:10,004 --> 00:00:16,004 ♪ I LIKE THAT CHICKEN AND NIGGAS, WATERMELON, OOH-OOH ♪ 2 00:00:16,006 --> 00:00:19,006 ♪ AIN'T GOT NO JOB, MNH-MNH I DON'T WANT ANYONE TO TAKE ME 3 00:00:19,013 --> 00:00:21,013 OUT OF CONTEXT. 4 00:00:21,013 --> 00:00:23,013 I'M, UH, I'M NOT A RACIST AND DON'T PLAN ON PUSHING THE 5 00:00:23,015 --> 00:00:25,005 STEREOTYPE THAT AFRICAN-AMERICANS HAVE IN 6 00:00:25,011 --> 00:00:27,011 AMERICA, BUT... 7 00:00:27,013 --> 00:00:31,003 ♪ I DO LIKE CHICKEN 8 00:00:31,006 --> 00:00:32,016 - [ ROARS ] 9 00:00:37,004 --> 00:00:38,024 - ♪ I LIKE CHEESE - ♪ I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I 10 00:00:38,020 --> 00:00:42,010 ♪ LI-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-KE ♪ CHEESE 11 00:00:42,013 --> 00:00:44,023 - ♪ CHEESE - CHEESE! CHEESE! CHEESE! 12 00:00:44,018 --> 00:00:47,008 AGHHHHHHHHH! AGHHHHHHHHH! 13 00:00:47,009 --> 00:00:47,019 - LOITER SQUAD. 14 00:00:47,021 --> 00:00:49,021 - AGHHHHHHHHH! 15 00:00:50,009 --> 00:00:52,009 - [ LAUGHS ] - LET'S BREAK INTO THIS 16 00:00:52,009 --> 00:00:55,019 WAREHOUSE AND DO TEENAGE THINGS, LIKE SEX, DRUGS, AND GET DRUNK. 17 00:00:55,018 --> 00:01:00,018 - YEAH, LET'S GET WASTED. 18 00:01:01,001 --> 00:01:02,021 - WHOA. 19 00:01:02,023 --> 00:01:03,013 OH! 20 00:01:03,013 --> 00:01:04,023 - WAY TO GO. 21 00:01:05,000 --> 00:01:05,020 GOOD JOB. 22 00:01:05,021 --> 00:01:08,011 - "WARNING -- BEWARE OF FAH FAH." 23 00:01:08,013 --> 00:01:09,013 WHAT THE FUCK IS A FAH FAH? 24 00:01:09,021 --> 00:01:10,021 - FAH FAH. 25 00:01:10,020 --> 00:01:15,010 [ LAUGHTER ] - FAH FAH. 26 00:01:15,009 --> 00:01:15,019 - AAH! 27 00:01:15,018 --> 00:01:17,008 - OH, MY GOD. 28 00:01:17,013 --> 00:01:19,013 WHAT WAS THAT? 29 00:01:19,013 --> 00:01:21,013 - FAH FAH. 30 00:01:21,013 --> 00:01:27,013 [ GROWLING ] FAH FAH. 31 00:01:27,012 --> 00:01:34,012 [ ALL SCREAMING ] 32 00:01:34,014 --> 00:01:36,024 FAH FAH. 33 00:01:36,019 --> 00:01:37,019 - AAH! 34 00:01:37,022 --> 00:01:41,012 FAH FAH, PLEASE DON'T SPIT ON MY THIGHS. 35 00:01:42,010 --> 00:01:44,020 AAH! 36 00:01:44,019 --> 00:01:46,009 - FAH FAH. 37 00:01:46,014 --> 00:01:47,004 - OH, MY GOD! 38 00:01:47,006 --> 00:01:55,006 [ ALL SCREAMING ] - FAH FAH. 39 00:01:55,007 --> 00:01:57,017 [ GROWLING ] - "THE LEGEND OF FAH FAH," THE 40 00:01:57,022 --> 00:02:02,012 18th-CENTURY NIGERIAN KILLER BABY. 41 00:02:02,012 --> 00:02:04,012 - [ GROWLING ] FAH FAH. 42 00:02:04,014 --> 00:02:07,014 - COMING SOON. 43 00:02:07,016 --> 00:02:11,016 - ♪ I LIKE RICE THIS IS DELICIOUS. 44 00:02:12,001 --> 00:02:16,011 ♪ I LIKE SOY SAUCE ♪ I LIKE EGG ROLL 45 00:02:16,015 --> 00:02:18,005 EGG ROLL. 46 00:02:18,007 --> 00:02:22,007 ♪ AND CHOCOLATES, UH - HEY, I'M DARK SHARK. 47 00:02:26,011 --> 00:02:28,011 I'M ABOUT TO TAKE MY SON, JASPER, A TOUR THROUGH MY HOOD, 48 00:02:28,015 --> 00:02:31,005 WHERE I GREW UP AT. 49 00:02:32,015 --> 00:02:33,015 WE USED TO DO SHIT LIKE THIS. 50 00:02:33,021 --> 00:02:36,011 WE'D FIND, LIKE, A SOFT DUDE IN OUR NEIGHBORHOOD, PROBABLY GOT 51 00:02:36,015 --> 00:02:37,005 HIS MAMA'S CAR. 52 00:02:37,007 --> 00:02:39,007 WE'D BE LIKE, "COME HERE, MAN. 53 00:02:39,015 --> 00:02:40,015 GIVE US A RIDE." 54 00:02:40,021 --> 00:02:43,011 WE'D GET IN HIS CAR, GET HIGH. 55 00:02:43,010 --> 00:02:44,010 HE'S SITTING THERE SOBER. 56 00:02:44,014 --> 00:02:47,024 BEFORE YOU KNOW IT, HE IN THE BACKSEAT, I'M DRIVING, AND WE 57 00:02:48,000 --> 00:02:50,010 SHOOTING UP SHIT. WE LAUGHIN', HE'S SCARED. 58 00:02:50,007 --> 00:02:53,017 WE ROBBING, SPRAY-PAINTING, FIGHTING, ALL IN HIS MAMA CAR, 59 00:02:53,018 --> 00:02:54,018 SCARING THE FUCK OUT OF HIM. 60 00:02:54,021 --> 00:02:56,001 YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING? 61 00:02:56,004 --> 00:02:58,024 I'D HAVE THE MOTHERFUCKER IN THR LIKE, "YOU CAN HAVE THE CAR. 62 00:02:59,000 --> 00:03:00,000 JUST LET ME OUT." 63 00:03:00,004 --> 00:03:01,024 BUT THE FUN IS TO HAVE HIM IN THE CAR, YOU KNOW WHAT I'M 64 00:03:01,022 --> 00:03:03,002 SAYING? 65 00:03:03,004 --> 00:03:05,004 AT THE END OF THE DAY, WE'D PROBABLY END UP SLAMMING HIS 66 00:03:05,002 --> 00:03:05,012 MAMA'S CAR. 67 00:03:05,014 --> 00:03:06,014 WE ALL RUN OUT, LEAVE. 68 00:03:06,007 --> 00:03:08,017 POLICE COME, HE'D BE IN TROUBLE. 69 00:03:08,023 --> 00:03:11,003 USED TO TEACH MUTHERFUCKERS THAT MOTHERFUCKERS HANGING WITH 70 00:03:11,004 --> 00:03:12,024 GANGBANGERS, TRYING TO BE COOL -- THEY DIDN'T GANGBANG, 71 00:03:12,017 --> 00:03:13,007 WE'D GET THEM. 72 00:03:13,012 --> 00:03:14,012 - COME HERE. 73 00:03:14,008 --> 00:03:19,008 - [ LAUGHS ] - ♪ BLACK COP, BLACK COP, 74 00:03:19,008 --> 00:03:22,008 WHAT THEM-A DO? ♪ ♪ WHAT THEM-A DO WHEN YOU STEP 75 00:03:22,014 --> 00:03:24,004 IN POO-POO? ♪ ♪ BLACK COP, BLACK COP, 76 00:03:24,004 --> 00:03:28,014 WHAT THEM-A DO? ♪ ♪ WHAT THEM-A DO WHEN YOU STEP 77 00:03:28,010 --> 00:03:30,000 IN POO-POO? ♪ [ GUN CLICKS ] 78 00:03:30,002 --> 00:03:32,012 ♪ POO-POO [ GUNSHOTS ] 79 00:03:32,015 --> 00:03:32,021 - SORRY. 80 00:03:32,023 --> 00:03:34,003 WRONG HOUSE. 81 00:03:34,003 --> 00:03:34,023 - SORRY ABOUT THIS. 82 00:03:34,017 --> 00:03:36,017 - SORRY. - FUCK! 83 00:03:36,021 --> 00:03:38,011 - ALL UNITS, BE ON THE LOOKOUT 84 00:03:38,009 --> 00:03:39,999 FOR A TALL, BLUE SUSPECT, POSSIBLY INTOXICATED. 85 00:03:40,005 --> 00:03:44,015 [ SIREN WAILS ] - OH, THERE HE GOES. 86 00:03:45,001 --> 00:03:49,021 - OH. THAT IS HIM. 87 00:03:49,021 --> 00:03:50,021 COME ON, BITCH. 88 00:03:50,018 --> 00:03:57,018 I'M GONNA GET YOU. 89 00:03:58,001 --> 00:04:00,021 GET HIM! 90 00:04:00,017 --> 00:04:04,017 [ GUNSHOTS ] [ BABY CRIES ] 91 00:04:04,022 --> 00:04:05,022 - NO ONE SAW ANYTHING. 92 00:04:05,021 --> 00:04:06,021 - STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. 93 00:04:07,000 --> 00:04:07,020 YOU DIDN'T SEE ANYTHING. 94 00:04:08,001 --> 00:04:09,001 JUST GO BACK IN YOUR HOUSE. 95 00:04:09,006 --> 00:04:10,016 - OH. OH! 96 00:04:10,022 --> 00:04:11,022 OH! WHAT IS THAT? 97 00:04:11,022 --> 00:04:13,022 YOU SEE WHY WE SHOT HIM? 98 00:04:14,001 --> 00:04:16,001 HE HAD 38 KILOS OF COCAINE ON HIM. 99 00:04:16,003 --> 00:04:18,023 YOU GUYS SEEN THAT SHIT RIGHT? 100 00:04:18,022 --> 00:04:19,022 - 38 KILOS OF COCAINE. 101 00:04:20,000 --> 00:04:21,020 - THAT'S THE SHIT I'M TALKING ABOUT. 102 00:04:21,023 --> 00:04:23,013 THAT'S WHY I SHOT HIM. 103 00:04:23,009 --> 00:04:26,019 HE WAS TRYING TO SELL DRUGS TO LITTLE WHITE GIRLS IN AMERICA SO 104 00:04:26,020 --> 00:04:28,010 THEY COULD DO DRUGS AND DIE. 105 00:04:28,014 --> 00:04:29,014 - CARTEL. 106 00:04:29,014 --> 00:04:31,004 - WE DON'T PLAY THAT SHIT - WE DON'T. 107 00:04:31,002 --> 00:04:35,022 WE SAVE THE WORLD. 108 00:04:35,018 --> 00:04:39,008 AAH! AAH! AAH! 109 00:04:39,023 --> 00:04:41,023 - WHAT DO YOU THINK? 110 00:04:42,000 --> 00:04:46,000 - HE AIN'T MAKING THAT SHIT. - HOW GOOD ARE YOUR SKILLS ON A 111 00:04:46,003 --> 00:04:46,013 BIKE? 112 00:04:46,012 --> 00:04:47,012 - I HAVE NONE. 113 00:04:47,007 --> 00:04:48,007 I CAN RIDE UP A HILL AND DOWN A HILL. 114 00:04:48,014 --> 00:04:49,004 - OKAY. 115 00:04:49,005 --> 00:04:51,005 WELL, THAT'S A GOOD START. 116 00:04:51,014 --> 00:04:54,014 [ LAUGHTER ] 117 00:04:54,015 --> 00:04:55,005 - HEY. 118 00:04:55,016 --> 00:04:56,996 I'M JASPER, AND I'M GONNA JUMP OFF THIS RAMP. 119 00:04:57,003 --> 00:05:01,023 - I GOT FIVE BUCKS THAT HE LANDS ON FIVE. 120 00:05:01,020 --> 00:05:02,020 - YEAH. 121 00:05:02,020 --> 00:05:04,010 - YOU GOT THIS, BUDDY. 122 00:05:04,016 --> 00:05:04,022 - OH, YEAH, YOU GOT THIS. 123 00:05:05,000 --> 00:05:05,020 - OH, YEAH. 124 00:05:05,023 --> 00:05:06,013 - YOU GOT THIS. 125 00:05:06,014 --> 00:05:08,004 - YEAH! 126 00:05:08,016 --> 00:05:11,006 YEAH! 127 00:05:11,015 --> 00:05:12,015 OH, YEAH! 128 00:05:12,018 --> 00:05:15,008 [ LAUGHTER ] - DAMN. 129 00:05:15,014 --> 00:05:16,024 - YOU ALL RIGHT, JASPER? 130 00:05:16,017 --> 00:05:17,017 - VICTORY IS MINE. 131 00:05:17,018 --> 00:05:19,008 - I'M SO PROUD OF YOU. 132 00:05:19,015 --> 00:05:20,015 - GOOD WORK. 133 00:05:20,023 --> 00:05:23,013 HE'S A LEGIT STUNT MAN. 134 00:05:26,000 --> 00:05:31,000 [ LAUGHTER ] - AW SHIT. FUCK! 135 00:05:33,017 --> 00:05:34,007 MY BALLS! 136 00:05:34,009 --> 00:05:36,009 - WANT ME TO END LIKE THAT? 137 00:05:36,009 --> 00:05:37,009 - MY BALLS! 138 00:05:37,016 --> 00:05:44,016 [ GROANING ] [ LAUGHTER ] 139 00:05:47,016 --> 00:05:49,016 - OW! 140 00:05:49,022 --> 00:05:50,022 OH! 141 00:05:50,020 --> 00:05:53,020 - DAMN. 142 00:05:53,022 --> 00:05:59,022 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 143 00:06:00,000 --> 00:06:00,010 - HEY. 144 00:06:00,016 --> 00:06:02,016 WELCOME BACK, COMEDY VIEWERS. 145 00:06:02,022 --> 00:06:05,022 TODAY, WE HAVE A YOUNG MAN BY THE NAME OF DAY-DAY. 146 00:06:05,019 --> 00:06:09,019 - All: YEAH! 147 00:06:10,000 --> 00:06:13,010 DAY-DAY! DAY-DAY! DAY-DAY! 148 00:06:13,016 --> 00:06:16,016 - SO, MY WIFE TELL ME TO GO TO THE STORE TO GET SOME CHEESE, 149 00:06:16,019 --> 00:06:17,009 SOME BREAD, AND SOME ONION. 150 00:06:17,009 --> 00:06:19,019 I GOT THE STORE, RIGHT? 151 00:06:19,017 --> 00:06:22,017 COME BACK, AND SHE SAY, "YOU GOT THE CHEESE, AND YOU GOT THE 152 00:06:22,019 --> 00:06:23,019 BREAD, BUT WHERE ARE THE ONIONS?" 153 00:06:23,022 --> 00:06:31,022 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] YOU KNOW, MY KIDS IS GROWING UP. 154 00:06:31,017 --> 00:06:32,017 MY KIDS IS GROWING UP, MAN. 155 00:06:32,021 --> 00:06:34,021 THEY GROWN! 156 00:06:34,021 --> 00:06:41,021 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] [ GRUNTS ] 157 00:06:42,000 --> 00:06:46,000 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] Y'ALL GET HOME SAFE TONIGHT, AND 158 00:06:46,005 --> 00:06:49,015 IF YOU HAVE SEX WITH YOUR GIRL, DO IT. 159 00:06:49,017 --> 00:06:51,017 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] [ PIANO MUSIC PLAYS ] 160 00:07:33,017 --> 00:07:35,017 - [BLEEP] [ GROANS ] 161 00:07:52,003 --> 00:07:56,013 [ CHOMPS ] [ CASH REGISTER DINGS ] 162 00:07:56,007 --> 00:07:59,007 - OH, YOU GONNA CUT ME LIKE MY DAD DID? 163 00:07:59,007 --> 00:08:01,007 THAT BITCH NIGGA AIN'T EVEN HAVE KIDS. 164 00:08:01,007 --> 00:08:03,007 I'M ADOPTED NIGGA STOP PLAYING. 165 00:08:03,012 --> 00:08:06,022 OH, YOU TALKING SHIT? I'M-A GET TO SPRAYING. 166 00:08:06,021 --> 00:08:08,001 WHY YOU LAUGHING NIGGA? DO I LOOK FUNNY? 167 00:08:08,004 --> 00:08:10,004 OH, YOU STARING AT ME? 168 00:08:10,006 --> 00:08:11,006 DO I OWE YOU MONEY? 169 00:08:11,010 --> 00:08:11,020 - NO. 170 00:08:11,021 --> 00:08:12,021 - OH, OKAY, THEN. 171 00:08:13,001 --> 00:08:16,001 PUT YOUR EYES IN YOUR SOCKET BEFORE I GET THE CLICK, CLACK 172 00:08:16,004 --> 00:08:17,014 NIGGA AND LOCK. 173 00:08:17,016 --> 00:08:18,006 - POW! 174 00:08:18,008 --> 00:08:21,008 - NIGGA! [ LAUGHS ] 175 00:08:21,016 --> 00:08:24,016 - I REACHED OUT TO A FEW FRIENDS, JUST LOOKING FOR SOME 176 00:08:25,001 --> 00:08:25,021 PEACE OF MIND. 177 00:08:26,000 --> 00:08:30,010 HE TOLD ME THAT IF I TRIED TO TELL ANYONE... 178 00:08:30,011 --> 00:08:31,011 HE'D KILL ME. 179 00:08:31,007 --> 00:08:33,017 - HEY, I'M TRYING TO FUCKING SLEEP. 180 00:08:33,020 --> 00:08:35,020 - ALL RIGHT. 181 00:08:35,020 --> 00:08:44,010 [ MEOWS ] - I BELIEVE HIM. 182 00:08:44,007 --> 00:08:49,007 - [ MEOWS ] - BARFIELD. 183 00:08:49,008 --> 00:08:51,998 COULD YOU JUST CLEAN UP A LITTLE BIT? 184 00:08:52,003 --> 00:08:55,023 - WHAT THE FUCK MY NIGGA? THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU? 185 00:08:55,020 --> 00:08:56,020 - PLEASE, PLEASE. 186 00:08:57,000 --> 00:08:58,000 PLEASE. 187 00:08:58,005 --> 00:09:00,015 - I'M NOT DOING SHIT. - I DON'T EVEN ASK FOR MUCH. 188 00:09:01,000 --> 00:09:05,010 I JUST ASK, JUST EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE, THAT HE CLEAN UP A LITTLE 189 00:09:05,014 --> 00:09:09,004 BIT, AND I GET HIT WITH A BOTTLE OR, YOU KNOW, HE TRIES TO CUT MY 190 00:09:09,005 --> 00:09:11,005 DICK OFF OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT. 191 00:09:11,010 --> 00:09:15,000 LAST WEEK, HE TRIED TO SHIT IN MY MOUTH. 192 00:09:15,002 --> 00:09:16,012 I'M PRETTY SURE HE'S NOT EVEN A CAT. 193 00:09:16,009 --> 00:09:19,999 LIKE, HE WALKS AROUND ON TWO FEET. 194 00:09:20,005 --> 00:09:23,995 HE DRINKS MALT LIQUOR. 195 00:09:24,006 --> 00:09:24,016 - WASTED. 196 00:09:24,021 --> 00:09:27,001 - OH, MY GOD. 197 00:09:27,005 --> 00:09:29,015 - [ CHUCKLES, MEOWS ] COME RUB MY BELLY. 198 00:09:29,021 --> 00:09:30,011 - NO. 199 00:09:30,013 --> 00:09:31,013 - COME RUB MY FUCKIN' BELLY. 200 00:09:31,014 --> 00:09:35,004 - I -- YOU -- YOU JUST -- - GET THE FUCK OVER HERE 201 00:09:35,005 --> 00:09:36,015 NOW. 202 00:09:37,018 --> 00:09:39,998 NIGGA I'M NOT PLAYING WITH YOU! 203 00:09:40,004 --> 00:09:42,014 - BARFIELD IS NOT A CAT. 204 00:09:42,010 --> 00:09:44,000 HE IS A GROWN MAN. 205 00:09:44,005 --> 00:09:45,015 HE CLEARLY HAS HANDS. 206 00:09:46,001 --> 00:09:49,001 YOU -- HE -- I'M JUST CONFUSED. 207 00:09:49,006 --> 00:09:52,006 IT'S -- IT'S JUST STRESSFUL. 208 00:09:52,010 --> 00:09:52,020 STOP. 209 00:09:53,000 --> 00:09:54,010 JUST CUT THIS OUT. 210 00:09:54,010 --> 00:09:55,010 IT'S TOO MUCH. 211 00:09:55,014 --> 00:09:56,024 - I DON'T FEEL SO GOOD, MAN. 212 00:09:56,022 --> 00:09:58,012 - JUST STOP. 213 00:09:58,011 --> 00:10:00,001 - [ VOMITS ] - OH, MY GOD! 214 00:10:00,006 --> 00:10:01,996 WHAT THE FUCK! NO. 215 00:10:02,002 --> 00:10:04,002 ALL RIGHT, FUCK YOU. 216 00:10:04,006 --> 00:10:05,016 I'M NOT CLEANING THIS UP. 217 00:10:05,023 --> 00:10:07,013 I'M NOT CLEANING THIS UP AGAIN. 218 00:10:07,014 --> 00:10:09,014 THERE'S NO WAY. 219 00:10:09,008 --> 00:10:12,008 - MONDAYS. 220 00:10:16,001 --> 00:10:18,021 - ♪ MY SISTER, MY NEW GIRLFRIEND ♪ 221 00:10:19,000 --> 00:10:21,020 ♪ MY PICKUP TRUCK, WHEELS SPINNING ♪ 222 00:10:21,019 --> 00:10:24,019 ♪ OH ♪ GIVE ME SOME CELERY AND SOME 223 00:10:24,023 --> 00:10:28,013 WHITE BREAD ♪ ♪ I DON'T SHOWER, I DON'T 224 00:10:28,015 --> 00:10:32,015 SHOWER, OH, YEAH ♪ ♪ THIS IS FOR MY ARYAN 225 00:10:32,023 --> 00:10:43,003 BROTHERS ♪ [ VOMITING ] 226 00:10:43,006 --> 00:10:44,006 YOU GET THAT SHOT? 227 00:10:44,007 --> 00:10:44,997 FUCK YOU GUYS. 228 00:10:45,006 --> 00:10:45,996 - WE GOT IT. 229 00:10:46,002 --> 00:10:46,012 GOOD. 230 00:10:46,014 --> 00:10:47,014 MAYONNAISE SANDWICH. 231 00:10:47,011 --> 00:10:48,011 - WELL, IT'S NOT ALL MAYONNAISE. 232 00:10:48,009 --> 00:10:50,019 - NO, IT WAS ALL FUCKING MAYONNAISE. 233 00:10:50,023 --> 00:10:52,013 - AAH! AAH! 234 00:10:52,011 --> 00:10:54,011 I GIVE UP, I GIVE UP. I GIVE UP. 235 00:10:54,013 --> 00:10:55,013 I'M GONNA CALL MY MOM. 236 00:10:55,008 --> 00:10:57,008 SHE DON'T TAKE NO SHIT FROM NO ONE. 237 00:10:57,009 --> 00:10:57,999 - WHAT KIND OF PUNISHMENT DO YOU LIKE? 238 00:10:58,004 --> 00:10:59,024 - I WILL CALL MY MOM! 239 00:10:59,022 --> 00:11:00,012 NO! MY ASS! 240 00:11:00,013 --> 00:11:02,003 - I CAN'T DO ANYTHING RIGHT. 241 00:11:02,006 --> 00:11:05,016 [ GROANS ] - ONE, TWO, THREE. 242 00:11:05,023 --> 00:11:08,023 [ LAUGHTER ] 16110

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