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1
00:00:07,798 --> 00:00:10,465
How the fuck does something
like this happen?
2
00:00:10,567 --> 00:00:13,134
How does an elephant just die?
3
00:00:13,236 --> 00:00:15,770
He was very old and depressed.
4
00:00:15,872 --> 00:00:18,273
He'd recently been
rescued from the circus,
5
00:00:18,375 --> 00:00:21,142
but as it turns out, he actually
really loved performing.
6
00:00:21,244 --> 00:00:23,378
Who gives a fuck about the elephant?
7
00:00:23,480 --> 00:00:24,846
What about me?
8
00:00:24,948 --> 00:00:26,247
This does not look good.
9
00:00:26,350 --> 00:00:29,050
I'm having a bit of trouble
figuring out how to remove him.
10
00:00:29,152 --> 00:00:30,852
He weighs 9,000 pounds.
11
00:00:30,954 --> 00:00:32,053
Cut it up.
12
00:00:32,155 --> 00:00:33,655
Take it out in pieces.
13
00:00:33,757 --> 00:00:34,856
I... I don't mean to interrupt,
14
00:00:34,958 --> 00:00:37,392
but... but I could call
in a personal favor
15
00:00:37,494 --> 00:00:39,327
and get a helo crew out of Travis AFB
16
00:00:39,429 --> 00:00:41,196
with a Sikorsky Skycrane
to airlift it out
17
00:00:41,298 --> 00:00:42,764
and drop it in the ocean
right after dark.
18
00:00:42,866 --> 00:00:44,966
No muss, no fuss.
19
00:00:45,068 --> 00:00:46,001
There.
20
00:00:46,103 --> 00:00:47,202
Was that so hard, Patrice?
21
00:00:47,304 --> 00:00:48,970
Because Hoover sure didn't think so.
22
00:00:49,072 --> 00:00:51,039
I mean, I just found my footing again,
23
00:00:51,141 --> 00:00:52,774
and you put me in
danger of losing it all
24
00:00:52,876 --> 00:00:54,676
over some fucking elephant?
25
00:00:55,812 --> 00:00:57,612
Gavin, you always said that
26
00:00:57,714 --> 00:01:00,515
here at Hooli, "In order
to achieve greatness,
27
00:01:00,617 --> 00:01:02,884
we must first achieve goodness."
28
00:01:02,986 --> 00:01:04,085
Right.
29
00:01:04,187 --> 00:01:05,286
So?
30
00:01:05,389 --> 00:01:07,455
So...
31
00:01:07,557 --> 00:01:10,258
I was a bridesmaid at
Sean Parker's wedding
32
00:01:10,360 --> 00:01:13,094
when he handed out live
bunnies as plush toys.
33
00:01:13,196 --> 00:01:15,130
That wasn't goodness.
34
00:01:15,232 --> 00:01:16,698
It was badness.
35
00:01:16,800 --> 00:01:18,500
And so is this.
36
00:01:18,602 --> 00:01:20,435
You're using endangered animals
37
00:01:20,537 --> 00:01:22,070
just to make points at board meetings.
38
00:01:22,172 --> 00:01:25,173
I'm drawing thoughtful,
zoological comparisons.
39
00:01:25,275 --> 00:01:28,877
But couldn't you just show them
a picture of these animals?
40
00:01:28,979 --> 00:01:31,880
A simple Hooli search would
yield thousands of choices.
41
00:01:31,982 --> 00:01:33,915
Patrice, I thank you for your honesty,
42
00:01:34,017 --> 00:01:35,850
and I will repay you with my own.
43
00:01:35,952 --> 00:01:38,553
I honestly never want to see
you in my offices again.
44
00:01:38,655 --> 00:01:40,055
You're fired.
45
00:01:40,157 --> 00:01:41,589
Hoover?
46
00:01:41,691 --> 00:01:44,059
- Scramble that Skycrane.
- HOOVER: Yes, sir.
47
00:01:45,062 --> 00:01:47,962
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
48
00:01:50,999 --> 00:01:55,089
- sync and corrections by Caio -
- www.addic7ed.com -
49
00:01:56,440 --> 00:01:57,972
Please, uh, come in.
50
00:01:58,075 --> 00:01:58,940
Come in. Have a seat.
51
00:01:59,042 --> 00:02:01,109
I won't take a lot of your time.
52
00:02:01,211 --> 00:02:02,444
I promise.
53
00:02:02,546 --> 00:02:03,478
Okay.
54
00:02:03,580 --> 00:02:04,712
Would you like some tea?
55
00:02:04,815 --> 00:02:07,248
I can put a kettle on the hot plate.
56
00:02:07,350 --> 00:02:08,783
Oh, no, I'm fine. Thank you.
57
00:02:08,885 --> 00:02:09,818
There's no trouble.
58
00:02:09,920 --> 00:02:11,186
You know what? I have a box of...
59
00:02:11,288 --> 00:02:14,289
of Russell Stover's if the
spiders didn't get into 'em.
60
00:02:14,391 --> 00:02:16,257
Jared, is this about the fake users?
61
00:02:18,161 --> 00:02:19,094
You know?
62
00:02:19,196 --> 00:02:20,762
Two days ago, I wanted to look
63
00:02:20,864 --> 00:02:22,297
at user behavior to figure out
64
00:02:22,399 --> 00:02:23,698
what spurred the sudden uptick,
65
00:02:23,800 --> 00:02:25,233
and, uh, well, I noticed something.
66
00:02:25,335 --> 00:02:27,102
Almost all of our new users
67
00:02:27,204 --> 00:02:29,471
were just uploading a single photo
68
00:02:29,573 --> 00:02:31,940
into a shared folder,
and then the next day,
69
00:02:32,042 --> 00:02:34,409
they would take the photo
out and then put it back in
70
00:02:34,511 --> 00:02:36,377
the day after that and that's it.
71
00:02:36,480 --> 00:02:39,314
You know, just enough to qualify
as a daily active user.
72
00:02:39,416 --> 00:02:40,915
Classic click-farm behavior.
73
00:02:41,017 --> 00:02:42,817
And then I remembered our
conversation in the bathtub,
74
00:02:42,919 --> 00:02:45,120
and it just...
it had to be you.
75
00:02:45,222 --> 00:02:47,155
Richard, I am so sorry.
76
00:02:47,257 --> 00:02:48,389
It's okay.
77
00:02:48,492 --> 00:02:50,468
Would it make you feel
better to... to strike me?
78
00:02:50,493 --> 00:02:52,428
No. You... you had good
intentions, Jared.
79
00:02:52,529 --> 00:02:53,995
Honestly, don't give it another thought.
80
00:02:54,097 --> 00:02:55,396
Just, you know...
81
00:02:55,499 --> 00:02:58,633
you and I right now are the
only ones that know about it.
82
00:02:58,735 --> 00:02:59,767
Okay?
83
00:02:59,870 --> 00:03:02,137
And in a few weeks, when
we run out of money,
84
00:03:02,239 --> 00:03:03,671
this will all be over anyway.
85
00:03:04,608 --> 00:03:07,041
- Richard?
- Yes?
86
00:03:08,044 --> 00:03:09,544
We have a secret.
87
00:03:10,680 --> 00:03:12,046
Yeah.
88
00:03:13,717 --> 00:03:14,949
ERLICH: I mean, I swear to god,
89
00:03:15,051 --> 00:03:16,251
your dicks would have blown
90
00:03:16,353 --> 00:03:17,585
out of the back of your assholes
91
00:03:17,687 --> 00:03:19,154
if you had been there, hand to God.
92
00:03:19,256 --> 00:03:20,388
Hey, guys. What's going on?
93
00:03:20,490 --> 00:03:22,891
Richard, sit down. I did it.
94
00:03:22,993 --> 00:03:24,626
I saved the company.
95
00:03:24,728 --> 00:03:26,594
What do you...
What? How?
96
00:03:26,696 --> 00:03:27,862
Jared, have you been crying?
97
00:03:27,964 --> 00:03:29,831
Yes, but for ordinary reasons.
98
00:03:29,933 --> 00:03:31,599
- Please, go on.
- ERLICH: Okay.
99
00:03:31,701 --> 00:03:33,401
I was at The Rosewood for lunch.
100
00:03:33,503 --> 00:03:34,502
I mean, it was the lunch hour.
101
00:03:34,604 --> 00:03:35,937
I was there, I wasn't eating, the usual.
102
00:03:36,039 --> 00:03:38,406
So, I walk over to Andreessen
and I say something funny,
103
00:03:38,508 --> 00:03:41,176
but he stone-faces me.
104
00:03:41,278 --> 00:03:42,377
What did you say?
105
00:03:42,479 --> 00:03:44,345
It doesn't matter. The point
is, it was hilarious,
106
00:03:44,447 --> 00:03:47,515
but he gave me nothing and
neither did his friends.
107
00:03:47,617 --> 00:03:49,484
Then I realized why.
108
00:03:49,586 --> 00:03:50,885
You're not funny?
109
00:03:50,987 --> 00:03:52,687
No, Gilfoyle, but that is.
110
00:03:52,789 --> 00:03:55,156
No, it's that everybody thinks
111
00:03:55,258 --> 00:03:56,824
Pied Piper is in this death spiral,
112
00:03:56,927 --> 00:03:59,127
so it would be inappropriate to
laugh at my hysterical joke.
113
00:03:59,229 --> 00:04:01,529
And it hits me.
114
00:04:01,631 --> 00:04:03,565
I know something that they don't.
115
00:04:03,667 --> 00:04:06,000
I know about the uptick.
116
00:04:06,102 --> 00:04:07,302
The uptick?
117
00:04:07,404 --> 00:04:09,003
Yes, the uptick!
118
00:04:10,140 --> 00:04:11,973
The recent sudden surge in users.
119
00:04:12,075 --> 00:04:13,474
(CHUCKLES) Yeah. That.
120
00:04:13,577 --> 00:04:15,510
Yes, that. So, while our fortune
121
00:04:15,612 --> 00:04:17,979
is rising, everybody else
thinks that it's plummeting,
122
00:04:18,081 --> 00:04:21,049
and I can use these opposing forces
123
00:04:21,151 --> 00:04:23,518
to a multiplying effect
like a slingshot,
124
00:04:23,620 --> 00:04:25,153
and then I make a decision.
125
00:04:25,255 --> 00:04:26,454
I'm gonna make a move.
126
00:04:26,556 --> 00:04:29,524
So, I say something
cryptic about the uptick,
127
00:04:29,626 --> 00:04:30,892
and I walk away.
128
00:04:30,994 --> 00:04:32,560
- What did you say?
- I don't know. I can't remember.
129
00:04:32,662 --> 00:04:35,697
But I walk over and I see
McNamee's having the short rib,
130
00:04:35,799 --> 00:04:37,532
which I hear is delicious
but not too heavy,
131
00:04:37,634 --> 00:04:38,800
and then I say to him,
132
00:04:38,902 --> 00:04:40,702
"You're gonna have to
tuck in your tie-dye
133
00:04:40,804 --> 00:04:42,437
if you want to eat here." (CHUCKLES)
134
00:04:42,539 --> 00:04:45,406
- Uh, how's that relevant?
- It's not.
135
00:04:45,508 --> 00:04:48,209
But the people that I just walked
away from don't know that.
136
00:04:48,311 --> 00:04:49,844
All they know is that I'm over there
137
00:04:49,946 --> 00:04:52,280
exchanging witty banter with McNamee,
138
00:04:52,382 --> 00:04:53,815
and about what, they don't know.
139
00:04:53,917 --> 00:04:55,850
It's all that they do want to know.
140
00:04:55,952 --> 00:04:58,052
And then, it settles in.
141
00:04:58,154 --> 00:04:59,921
F.O.M.O.
142
00:05:00,023 --> 00:05:01,923
The fear of missing out.
143
00:05:02,025 --> 00:05:03,958
Suddenly, it feels like
time is slowing down.
144
00:05:04,060 --> 00:05:06,661
I could see every move I was
going to make 12 steps ahead.
145
00:05:06,763 --> 00:05:09,197
It was like I was Bobby Fischer
if he could really fuck.
146
00:05:09,299 --> 00:05:11,165
I go outside, I walk across the street
147
00:05:11,268 --> 00:05:12,967
to Graylock, I check in on Instagram,
148
00:05:13,069 --> 00:05:15,737
Vinod Khosla calls me, asks
me what I doing there.
149
00:05:15,839 --> 00:05:18,640
I say, "I can't talk right now.
Call me at Wood Opal."
150
00:05:18,742 --> 00:05:21,476
Well, he does, and then
suddenly Wood Opal is going,
151
00:05:21,578 --> 00:05:23,444
"What's Khosla got going
on with Bachman?"
152
00:05:23,546 --> 00:05:26,481
Meanwhile, I'm taking a leak
at a Restoration Hardware.
153
00:05:26,583 --> 00:05:28,783
I jack off a little bit. I don't cum.
154
00:05:28,885 --> 00:05:30,685
And then it snowballs.
155
00:05:30,787 --> 00:05:34,689
I deftly played Ross Loma
against Index Ventures.
156
00:05:34,791 --> 00:05:38,793
And because of that,
the big kahuna bites.
157
00:05:38,895 --> 00:05:40,094
Sequoia.
158
00:05:40,196 --> 00:05:43,865
I spend the next 20 minutes
denying calls from Jim Goetz,
159
00:05:43,967 --> 00:05:45,199
over and over.
160
00:05:45,302 --> 00:05:47,635
And yes, I'm jacking off, but
I don't need to ejaculate
161
00:05:47,737 --> 00:05:50,171
because by the time I
listen to the messages,
162
00:05:50,273 --> 00:05:53,308
I've got offers, I've got counters,
163
00:05:53,410 --> 00:05:55,310
I've got counter-counters.
164
00:05:55,412 --> 00:05:56,477
I cum.
165
00:05:57,947 --> 00:05:59,781
When the dust settled...
166
00:05:59,883 --> 00:06:03,818
and the losers went home,
all that was left was this.
167
00:06:05,088 --> 00:06:06,254
"Hello, Mr. Bachman.
168
00:06:06,356 --> 00:06:09,824
"Coleman Blair Partners would
like to offer Pied Piper
169
00:06:09,926 --> 00:06:13,761
"a Series B round of $6 million
170
00:06:13,863 --> 00:06:17,031
on a $60 million valuation."
171
00:06:17,133 --> 00:06:18,666
Oh.
172
00:06:19,836 --> 00:06:20,902
(QUIETLY) Yeah!
173
00:06:21,004 --> 00:06:23,271
Holy shit.
174
00:06:23,373 --> 00:06:25,907
And this asshole wanted
to pivot to video chat.
175
00:06:26,009 --> 00:06:26,974
Still valid.
176
00:06:27,077 --> 00:06:29,610
Although less sexy now.
I'll concede that.
177
00:06:29,713 --> 00:06:30,945
It's my Mona Lisa.
178
00:06:31,047 --> 00:06:33,047
And the entire cornerstone
179
00:06:33,149 --> 00:06:36,551
upon which I built this
motherfucking cathedral
180
00:06:36,653 --> 00:06:38,753
that I will forever be remembered for,
181
00:06:38,855 --> 00:06:43,191
was this beautiful little uptick.
182
00:06:44,794 --> 00:06:46,828
I think I have a bottle of
Cold Duck in the crisper.
183
00:06:46,930 --> 00:06:48,229
Who's drinking? Come on!
184
00:06:48,331 --> 00:06:50,098
I got a bottle of
Martinelli's for you, Jared.
185
00:06:50,200 --> 00:06:52,633
This is a big day! (CHUCKLES)
186
00:06:52,736 --> 00:06:55,536
We did it! Yes! (CHUCKLES)
187
00:06:55,638 --> 00:06:57,605
- DINESH: Are there any wine coolers?
- I'll talk to him.
188
00:06:57,707 --> 00:06:58,840
I... I'll talk to him.
189
00:06:58,942 --> 00:07:00,875
Here's my Hooli badge.
190
00:07:01,945 --> 00:07:03,978
And I have a hanging tag
191
00:07:04,080 --> 00:07:06,681
on my rear-view mirror for
the parking structure.
192
00:07:06,783 --> 00:07:07,882
Can I just mail that in?
193
00:07:07,984 --> 00:07:09,951
No, you need to go get that now.
194
00:07:10,053 --> 00:07:11,552
Okay.
195
00:07:35,612 --> 00:07:36,811
Hey, Dinesh.
196
00:07:36,913 --> 00:07:38,813
I'm just, um, looking for Erlich.
Have you seen him?
197
00:07:38,915 --> 00:07:40,214
Oh, he went to the liquor store.
198
00:07:40,316 --> 00:07:41,482
Gotta keep the party going, you know?
199
00:07:41,584 --> 00:07:43,618
Oh yeah. Yeah, Series B. Crazy, right?
200
00:07:43,720 --> 00:07:45,386
- Oh, it's unreal.
- Yeah.
201
00:07:45,488 --> 00:07:47,722
Almost like some of our users.
202
00:07:49,592 --> 00:07:50,558
What?
203
00:07:50,660 --> 00:07:52,093
What... what does that mean?
204
00:07:52,195 --> 00:07:54,328
Oh, "unreal" has so many meanings.
205
00:07:54,431 --> 00:07:56,264
"Fake," "paid for,"
206
00:07:56,366 --> 00:07:59,934
"one person in Bangladesh
pretending to be 6,000."
207
00:08:00,036 --> 00:08:01,569
Okay. Um...
208
00:08:01,671 --> 00:08:03,271
All right, Dinesh, um...
209
00:08:03,373 --> 00:08:04,539
Oh, no.
210
00:08:04,641 --> 00:08:06,040
I don't want to know a fucking thing.
211
00:08:06,142 --> 00:08:08,342
Okay then. Great.
212
00:08:08,445 --> 00:08:12,313
I won't tell you anything
because nothing happened.
213
00:08:12,415 --> 00:08:13,381
Great.
214
00:08:13,483 --> 00:08:14,749
Okay.
215
00:08:15,919 --> 00:08:17,652
(GASPS) But if something did happen,
216
00:08:17,754 --> 00:08:19,187
and we're not saying it did,
217
00:08:19,289 --> 00:08:20,655
the fact remains
218
00:08:20,757 --> 00:08:23,024
that leaves us in a very
advantageous position.
219
00:08:23,126 --> 00:08:25,226
There's a lot of money on the table.
220
00:08:25,328 --> 00:08:27,161
And it would be a shame
if that went away.
221
00:08:27,263 --> 00:08:28,863
You know what else would be a shame...
222
00:08:28,965 --> 00:08:32,333
(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY) is if I
couldn't find my flash drive.
223
00:08:32,435 --> 00:08:34,335
Gilfoyle, have you seen my flash drive?
224
00:08:34,437 --> 00:08:36,304
Right, the one with the
zombie script on it?
225
00:08:36,406 --> 00:08:40,141
Why yes, the zombie script
that randomizes user action
226
00:08:40,243 --> 00:08:41,876
in platforms such as Pied Piper.
227
00:08:41,978 --> 00:08:43,177
GILFOYLE: You mean so that
228
00:08:43,279 --> 00:08:45,580
fake users and click farms would be
229
00:08:45,682 --> 00:08:48,316
absolutely indistinguishable
from real users?
230
00:08:48,418 --> 00:08:49,383
Oh, I suppose.
231
00:08:49,486 --> 00:08:51,719
I mean, especially during due diligence,
232
00:08:51,821 --> 00:08:54,755
like the kind done by VCs
or possible future reviews
233
00:08:54,858 --> 00:08:57,925
done by certain regulatory bodies.
234
00:08:58,027 --> 00:09:00,461
It also had photos of my auntie.
235
00:09:01,564 --> 00:09:03,431
Anyway, Gilfoyle, have you seen it?
236
00:09:03,533 --> 00:09:04,532
I have not.
237
00:09:04,634 --> 00:09:07,902
Mm, well, Richard, keep an
eye out for it, will ya?
238
00:09:16,513 --> 00:09:18,613
Hey, Gilfoyle, you wanna
come inside and help me
239
00:09:18,715 --> 00:09:23,351
- get a new flash drive on www.staples.com?
- Yeah, I think
240
00:09:23,453 --> 00:09:25,086
- we're sort of done with the ruse.
- Okay.
241
00:09:25,188 --> 00:09:27,355
Okay, fine. Well, whatever you did
242
00:09:27,457 --> 00:09:30,691
or didn't do, that was
serial-killer-level shit.
243
00:09:30,793 --> 00:09:31,626
Agreed.
244
00:09:31,728 --> 00:09:33,995
I think I finally respect you as a CEO.
245
00:09:37,100 --> 00:09:38,533
(DOOR CLOSES)
246
00:09:38,635 --> 00:09:39,834
Fuck.
247
00:09:49,546 --> 00:09:50,545
This is fraud.
248
00:09:50,647 --> 00:09:52,179
Is it?
249
00:09:52,282 --> 00:09:55,983
I mean, our... our platform does
exactly what we say it does.
250
00:09:56,085 --> 00:09:57,985
Okay? It's not like we're lying about it
251
00:09:58,087 --> 00:09:59,320
like fucking Theranos.
252
00:09:59,422 --> 00:10:02,123
And if our platform works,
which we know it will,
253
00:10:02,225 --> 00:10:05,026
we will make them billions of dollars.
254
00:10:05,128 --> 00:10:06,427
Everybody wins, Jared.
255
00:10:06,529 --> 00:10:07,695
You still believe that, right?
256
00:10:07,797 --> 00:10:10,631
That, if given enough time,
the platform will catch on?
257
00:10:10,733 --> 00:10:14,001
Richard, don't weaponize my
faith in you against me.
258
00:10:14,103 --> 00:10:16,804
Your faith made all this possible.
259
00:10:16,906 --> 00:10:18,172
It's wrong.
260
00:10:18,274 --> 00:10:20,908
Well, every time I try to do
the right thing, I get fucked.
261
00:10:21,010 --> 00:10:22,443
And if I do the right thing here,
262
00:10:22,545 --> 00:10:23,778
we're done. That's it.
263
00:10:23,880 --> 00:10:25,947
Doesn't seem like much
of an option, does it?
264
00:10:28,017 --> 00:10:29,250
(DOOR OPENS)
265
00:10:29,352 --> 00:10:32,386
- Deng, they're all just so good.
- (UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)
266
00:10:32,488 --> 00:10:35,089
RECEPTIONIST: Gavin,
CJ Cantwell, line one.
267
00:10:35,191 --> 00:10:37,391
Deng, let's pick this up tomorrow.
268
00:10:38,795 --> 00:10:39,961
(MUSIC STOPS)
269
00:10:40,063 --> 00:10:40,995
CJ.
270
00:10:41,097 --> 00:10:43,331
I'm finishing a story
I'd love a comment on.
271
00:10:43,433 --> 00:10:46,968
It's about the death of an
unpermitted Indian elephant
272
00:10:47,070 --> 00:10:50,538
named Maurice in your sculpture
garden and its subsequent
273
00:10:50,640 --> 00:10:52,573
illegal dumping in the
San Francisco Bay.
274
00:10:52,675 --> 00:10:54,275
That's preposterous.
275
00:10:54,377 --> 00:10:56,077
Mm, I have a very good source.
276
00:10:57,714 --> 00:10:59,647
What do you propose we do here?
277
00:10:59,749 --> 00:11:01,515
Well, I have one idea.
278
00:11:01,618 --> 00:11:03,985
And what, pray tell, might that be?
279
00:11:04,087 --> 00:11:07,989
CJ sold the blog for $2 million.
280
00:11:08,091 --> 00:11:10,491
- No shit.
- (BOTH CHUCKLE)
281
00:11:10,593 --> 00:11:11,559
Bachmanity rides again.
282
00:11:11,661 --> 00:11:14,295
Well, not exactly. Uh, I called Big Head
283
00:11:14,397 --> 00:11:16,731
to tell him that our share
was worth half a mil each,
284
00:11:16,833 --> 00:11:18,566
and, uh, not five minutes later,
285
00:11:18,668 --> 00:11:21,535
his father, one Nelson Bighetti, Sr.,
286
00:11:21,638 --> 00:11:23,838
called me and explained
that I was never to have
287
00:11:23,940 --> 00:11:25,940
any financial dealings with his son
288
00:11:26,042 --> 00:11:28,376
in perpetuity, uh, ever
289
00:11:28,478 --> 00:11:30,177
or he would get very Italian on me.
290
00:11:30,279 --> 00:11:31,946
And I'm not interested
291
00:11:32,048 --> 00:11:33,481
to find out what that means.
292
00:11:33,583 --> 00:11:34,815
Okay. Shall we?
293
00:11:34,917 --> 00:11:37,051
To Coleman Blair! Let's
close this fucker.
294
00:11:37,153 --> 00:11:38,452
Good luck, fellas.
295
00:11:42,158 --> 00:11:43,290
(CAR DOOR CLICKS OPEN)
296
00:11:44,360 --> 00:11:46,661
- (CAR DOOR CLOSES)
- (CAR ENGINE STARTS)
297
00:12:04,847 --> 00:12:07,515
Remember, you just sit
there and look pretty.
298
00:12:07,617 --> 00:12:09,050
Leave all the talking to me.
299
00:12:09,152 --> 00:12:10,851
And if you mention my Montblanc,
300
00:12:10,953 --> 00:12:13,354
then, uh, don't make it
overt, like I told you to.
301
00:12:13,456 --> 00:12:14,922
- But do.
- (RICHARD'S PHONE VIBRATES)
302
00:12:17,126 --> 00:12:18,559
Uh...
303
00:12:18,661 --> 00:12:19,694
Hey, what's up?
304
00:12:19,796 --> 00:12:21,629
Are you guys out raising
money from someone else?
305
00:12:21,731 --> 00:12:24,832
Uh, Monica, it's, uh...
it's kind of a long story.
306
00:12:24,934 --> 00:12:27,301
- Why are you whispering?
- Uh... Um...
307
00:12:27,403 --> 00:12:29,937
Oh, my god, you're there
right now, aren't you?
308
00:12:30,039 --> 00:12:31,305
Jesus! Do you have any idea
309
00:12:31,407 --> 00:12:33,107
how big of an asshole
you're making me look here?
310
00:12:33,209 --> 00:12:35,376
Laurie just lost her shit at me, okay?
311
00:12:35,478 --> 00:12:37,845
So, you need to turn around and
walk the hell out of there.
312
00:12:37,947 --> 00:12:40,448
Erlich put all this together. I
really had nothing to do with it.
313
00:12:40,550 --> 00:12:42,083
You have everything to do with it.
314
00:12:42,185 --> 00:12:43,684
You're the fucking CEO, Richard!
315
00:12:43,786 --> 00:12:47,288
Whatever your company
does is 100% on you!
316
00:12:47,390 --> 00:12:48,556
Gentlemen.
317
00:12:49,659 --> 00:12:50,925
- They're ready for you.
- Oh.
318
00:12:51,027 --> 00:12:52,226
Yes. I... I gotta go.
319
00:12:52,328 --> 00:12:53,294
Do not hang up on me.
320
00:12:53,396 --> 00:12:55,229
- Richard, do not...
- (PHONE DISCONNECTS)
321
00:12:56,165 --> 00:12:57,364
So listen, we're pumped, guys.
322
00:12:57,467 --> 00:12:59,133
We're thrilled to be
getting into Pied Piper
323
00:12:59,235 --> 00:13:00,568
right at this inflection point.
324
00:13:00,670 --> 00:13:01,669
It's very exciting.
325
00:13:01,771 --> 00:13:03,637
We are pumped as well.
Aren't we, Richard?
326
00:13:03,740 --> 00:13:04,805
- Richard.
- Hm?
327
00:13:04,907 --> 00:13:05,840
- Pumped.
- Pumped!
328
00:13:05,942 --> 00:13:07,775
- We are pumped up.
- Pumped up. Mm-hmm.
329
00:13:07,877 --> 00:13:11,345
So we'll just need your
John Hancock right here.
330
00:13:11,447 --> 00:13:12,346
Oh, sure, Richard.
331
00:13:12,448 --> 00:13:14,882
Uh, you can use my Montblanc.
332
00:13:15,818 --> 00:13:17,451
Oh. Uh...
333
00:13:17,553 --> 00:13:19,220
this is an actual term sheet.
334
00:13:19,322 --> 00:13:21,922
And once I sign this...
this, that's it, right?
335
00:13:22,024 --> 00:13:24,325
- Yup. No turning back.
- (BOTH CHUCKLE)
336
00:13:24,427 --> 00:13:25,493
(CHUCKLES)
337
00:13:26,796 --> 00:13:27,828
You can have your lawyers vet
338
00:13:27,930 --> 00:13:29,230
the actual stock purchase agreement
339
00:13:29,332 --> 00:13:30,731
once we close here just to make sure
340
00:13:30,833 --> 00:13:32,066
no one is pulling any funny business.
341
00:13:32,168 --> 00:13:35,069
- (CHUCKLES) No, no.
- No, my lawyer is in jail, so.
342
00:13:36,606 --> 00:13:37,671
So.
343
00:13:39,308 --> 00:13:41,142
Hm. (CHUCKLES)
344
00:13:46,282 --> 00:13:47,615
Oh, my god. I, uh...
345
00:13:47,717 --> 00:13:50,251
(CHUCKLES) Wow, I can't believe
I didn't think of this
346
00:13:50,353 --> 00:13:52,219
before, um, because,
347
00:13:52,321 --> 00:13:53,654
well, let me put it to you this way.
348
00:13:53,756 --> 00:13:55,222
What would you say if I told you that
349
00:13:55,324 --> 00:13:57,491
the same compression
that you know and love
350
00:13:57,593 --> 00:13:59,293
is being used in a world-beating,
351
00:13:59,395 --> 00:14:02,596
game-changing...
wait for it...
352
00:14:02,698 --> 00:14:04,598
video conferencing application?
353
00:14:04,700 --> 00:14:08,035
Wouldn't that be interesting?
354
00:14:09,338 --> 00:14:11,705
- What?
- You mean like Hooli-Chat?
355
00:14:11,808 --> 00:14:14,108
This will be far superior to Hooli-Chat.
356
00:14:14,210 --> 00:14:16,110
You may want to fund that instead.
357
00:14:16,212 --> 00:14:17,611
In fact, why don't I, um...
358
00:14:17,713 --> 00:14:19,280
why don't I just go home,
I'll grab my laptop,
359
00:14:19,382 --> 00:14:20,948
I'll come back here, I'll
show it to you guys.
360
00:14:21,050 --> 00:14:22,416
It's not that far. I don't mind.
361
00:14:22,518 --> 00:14:24,285
- I'll tell you what, I'll grab an Uber.
- Richard, what...
362
00:14:24,387 --> 00:14:25,853
- No, no, no, no.
- It's no problem.
363
00:14:25,955 --> 00:14:27,888
- Richard, what the fuck are you doing?
- There. I've ordered it.
364
00:14:27,990 --> 00:14:30,090
Neal is in a blue Kia Sportage and
he's right around the corner.
365
00:14:30,193 --> 00:14:31,692
All right, all right. Look, look, look.
366
00:14:31,794 --> 00:14:34,595
I don't know who else you're
talking to about the platform,
367
00:14:34,697 --> 00:14:36,897
but I'm willing to go up
to seven million on 70.
368
00:14:36,999 --> 00:14:39,967
Okay? But that's it. You sign this
thing right here and right now.
369
00:14:40,069 --> 00:14:42,269
Bravo, Richard. Nice neg.
370
00:14:42,371 --> 00:14:43,604
Now sign it.
371
00:14:43,706 --> 00:14:45,706
Thank you. Very generous of you.
372
00:14:45,808 --> 00:14:48,576
I just... I just want to make sure
that you're aware of all the feedback
373
00:14:48,678 --> 00:14:51,212
'cause we had some focus groups
and there were some issues.
374
00:14:51,314 --> 00:14:52,446
Just so you're clear,
375
00:14:52,548 --> 00:14:55,716
people have been wondering, "Eh!
Where are my files?
376
00:14:55,818 --> 00:14:57,186
"Zero K used? Where's
the download button?
377
00:14:57,211 --> 00:14:57,942
Richard, Richard...
378
00:14:58,020 --> 00:14:59,887
- The terminator... "
- All right, all right, you know what?
379
00:14:59,989 --> 00:15:00,514
'Cause it...
380
00:15:00,539 --> 00:15:02,113
I'm gonna sign it. Can I sign it?
I'll sign it.
381
00:15:02,191 --> 00:15:05,192
You can if you want, but we
still need his signature.
382
00:15:10,266 --> 00:15:12,466
Richard, sign it.
383
00:15:12,568 --> 00:15:14,134
That's two years of runway.
384
00:15:14,237 --> 00:15:15,870
- Sign it now!
- I can't.
385
00:15:15,972 --> 00:15:17,471
Why the fuck not?
386
00:15:17,573 --> 00:15:18,839
Because the numbers are fake.
387
00:15:20,109 --> 00:15:21,475
What?
388
00:15:21,577 --> 00:15:22,643
What? What do you mean?
389
00:15:22,745 --> 00:15:24,745
- What do you...
- We bought...
390
00:15:24,847 --> 00:15:28,515
fake users from a
Bangladeshi click farm.
391
00:15:29,552 --> 00:15:30,951
The uptick was fake.
392
00:15:32,288 --> 00:15:35,789
But the...
the vid chat...
393
00:15:35,892 --> 00:15:37,258
is real.
394
00:15:37,360 --> 00:15:40,094
Erlich, the fake users were just
meant to cheer the guys up.
395
00:15:40,196 --> 00:15:41,862
I had no idea you were
gonna take those numbers...
396
00:15:41,964 --> 00:15:43,264
And what, and go do my fucking job?
397
00:15:43,366 --> 00:15:45,532
Pour everything I had into
getting the best possible
398
00:15:45,635 --> 00:15:48,235
deal for Pied Piper because
I believe in them?
399
00:15:48,337 --> 00:15:49,570
Well, that's all over now.
400
00:15:49,672 --> 00:15:52,039
Richard, we are fucked!
401
00:15:52,141 --> 00:15:54,008
In the amount of time that
it took for us to get
402
00:15:54,110 --> 00:15:55,576
from that office to right here,
403
00:15:55,678 --> 00:15:57,411
every VC in the Valley knows about this.
404
00:15:57,513 --> 00:16:00,247
If I signed those term sheets,
I would be committing fraud.
405
00:16:00,349 --> 00:16:01,582
That's a fucking crime!
406
00:16:01,684 --> 00:16:02,816
You're saying you wanted me to...
407
00:16:02,919 --> 00:16:04,652
No, I wanted you to
fucking think about that
408
00:16:04,754 --> 00:16:07,021
before you paraded me around
the whole fucking valley
409
00:16:07,123 --> 00:16:08,088
to sell your lie!
410
00:16:08,190 --> 00:16:11,558
And then suddenly grew a
thick, girthy conscience
411
00:16:11,661 --> 00:16:12,660
and fucked me with it.
412
00:16:12,762 --> 00:16:14,128
Are you Richard?
413
00:16:14,230 --> 00:16:16,597
- Did you order an Uber?
- Oh. No.
414
00:16:17,934 --> 00:16:21,035
All you had to do was keep
your fucking mouth shut
415
00:16:21,137 --> 00:16:23,003
and sign that piece of paper.
416
00:16:23,105 --> 00:16:25,406
We would have fixed it afterwards.
417
00:16:25,508 --> 00:16:27,708
But you didn't. You caked your pants.
418
00:16:27,810 --> 00:16:29,910
No, better yet, you caked my pants.
419
00:16:30,012 --> 00:16:31,578
Fuck you, Richard Hendricks.
420
00:16:31,681 --> 00:16:33,180
Fuck you.
421
00:16:34,283 --> 00:16:35,749
Richard Hendricks, huh?
422
00:16:35,851 --> 00:16:37,384
Prick.
423
00:16:37,486 --> 00:16:40,354
- (TIRES SCREECH)
- (TIRES SCREECH)
424
00:16:42,358 --> 00:16:43,424
(KNOCKING)
425
00:16:44,560 --> 00:16:47,061
- Hey.
- Oh, hey, Monica.
426
00:16:47,163 --> 00:16:48,929
Is Richard here? I heard what happened,
427
00:16:49,031 --> 00:16:50,531
but he's not answering any of my calls.
428
00:16:50,633 --> 00:16:52,399
We just wanted you to
know for the record
429
00:16:52,501 --> 00:16:55,836
that we had no idea any of
that stuff was going on.
430
00:16:55,938 --> 00:16:57,871
Still trying to wrap
our heads around it.
431
00:16:57,974 --> 00:17:00,808
Point is, don't beat yourself
up about not seeing it.
432
00:17:00,910 --> 00:17:02,476
I'm not beating myself up...
433
00:17:02,578 --> 00:17:05,112
I hope you don't think we're
guilty by association,
434
00:17:05,214 --> 00:17:08,816
because then we would have to think you're
guilty by association, which we don't.
435
00:17:08,918 --> 00:17:11,318
Just want to let you know
that we would definitely work
436
00:17:11,420 --> 00:17:12,720
with you again in the future.
437
00:17:12,822 --> 00:17:15,022
It's good to know. Guys, thanks.
438
00:17:15,124 --> 00:17:17,458
Um... is he in his room?
439
00:17:17,560 --> 00:17:19,827
I mean, he said he was.
440
00:17:20,896 --> 00:17:23,163
But...
441
00:17:23,265 --> 00:17:24,898
I'm gonna go to his room.
442
00:17:25,001 --> 00:17:26,133
- Mm-hmm.
- (PHONE CHIMES)
443
00:17:27,336 --> 00:17:30,170
Uh, what's up, Gleb?
444
00:17:30,272 --> 00:17:33,307
I hear, uh, Richard shit bed, huh?
445
00:17:33,409 --> 00:17:36,410
So, the platform is no goo-oo-oo-oo...
446
00:17:36,512 --> 00:17:39,146
Fuck, now the vid chat's fucking up.
447
00:17:40,016 --> 00:17:42,282
Odd, considering who
wrote the code for it.
448
00:17:42,385 --> 00:17:44,618
Not the code. The server is overloaded.
449
00:17:44,720 --> 00:17:46,854
How is that possible? We only
gave it to like 12 people.
450
00:17:46,956 --> 00:17:50,491
Well, there's a few more
than that using it now.
451
00:17:51,627 --> 00:17:52,559
Holy shit.
452
00:17:52,661 --> 00:17:54,161
For what it's worth, Richard,
453
00:17:54,263 --> 00:17:55,796
I think you did the right thing.
454
00:17:55,898 --> 00:17:58,465
And I can see now why you didn't
want to come to us for funding.
455
00:17:58,567 --> 00:18:00,467
You were trying to protect us.
456
00:18:00,569 --> 00:18:02,069
Yeah.
457
00:18:02,171 --> 00:18:03,704
Well, I really appreciate it.
458
00:18:03,806 --> 00:18:06,607
Uh, Laurie wants out.
459
00:18:06,709 --> 00:18:10,310
Even a whiff of fraud is
a mortal sin for VCs.
460
00:18:10,413 --> 00:18:13,280
She needs to wash her hands
of any Pied Piper business.
461
00:18:13,382 --> 00:18:14,681
She's forcing a sale.
462
00:18:14,784 --> 00:18:16,116
Fuck.
463
00:18:16,218 --> 00:18:18,886
Yeah, frick.
464
00:18:18,988 --> 00:18:20,087
Yeah.
465
00:18:20,189 --> 00:18:21,388
But it is an open auction,
466
00:18:21,490 --> 00:18:23,724
and, you know, between
the fraudulent numbers
467
00:18:23,826 --> 00:18:26,060
and the real numbers,
468
00:18:26,162 --> 00:18:28,228
you guys aren't exactly
killing it out there.
469
00:18:28,330 --> 00:18:30,597
So, there is a chance
that no one will bid
470
00:18:30,699 --> 00:18:32,666
and you might be able to
buy back your own company
471
00:18:32,768 --> 00:18:33,700
for next to nothing.
472
00:18:33,803 --> 00:18:35,636
That will have to be
for literally nothing
473
00:18:35,738 --> 00:18:37,604
because we're out of money.
474
00:18:41,844 --> 00:18:42,876
- (CLANG)
- Ow!
475
00:18:42,978 --> 00:18:44,545
Jesus! Are you okay?
476
00:18:44,647 --> 00:18:47,081
Yeah, we're fine.
477
00:18:47,183 --> 00:18:49,416
All right, I spun together
a few more servers.
478
00:18:49,518 --> 00:18:50,918
That should handle the traffic.
479
00:18:51,020 --> 00:18:53,420
Look at this. There are 157 people
480
00:18:53,522 --> 00:18:54,721
using it near Gleb.
481
00:18:54,824 --> 00:18:56,857
And 400 people using it
near Tara in Boston.
482
00:18:56,959 --> 00:19:00,160
Yeah, I told her to give it to
her Satanist friends out there.
483
00:19:00,262 --> 00:19:01,428
Looks like she did.
484
00:19:01,530 --> 00:19:05,299
She knows 400 Satanists in Boston?
485
00:19:05,401 --> 00:19:07,768
The Catholic church really
did a number on that town.
486
00:19:09,138 --> 00:19:12,139
Hey, Erlich, remember
when Gilfoyle said that
487
00:19:12,241 --> 00:19:14,041
my video chat app was a piece of shit
488
00:19:14,143 --> 00:19:15,943
and that nobody would ever use it?
489
00:19:16,045 --> 00:19:19,480
Well, he was wrong. Over 4,000 times.
490
00:19:19,582 --> 00:19:22,349
Wow, and you developed that
with the Pied Piper IP, right?
491
00:19:23,285 --> 00:19:25,119
Well, then you can kiss that goodbye.
492
00:19:26,188 --> 00:19:27,187
Oh, fuck.
493
00:19:27,289 --> 00:19:29,123
Speaking of, I'm actually using
494
00:19:29,225 --> 00:19:31,892
the first dollars of my blog windfall
495
00:19:31,994 --> 00:19:33,827
on a trip to Kainchi Dham Ashram
496
00:19:33,929 --> 00:19:35,929
in Nainital, India,
497
00:19:36,031 --> 00:19:39,833
where Steve Jobs famously
sought peace and came up
498
00:19:39,935 --> 00:19:44,071
with the idea for a little
product called the Lisa.
499
00:19:44,173 --> 00:19:45,305
Good luck.
500
00:19:45,407 --> 00:19:46,773
(RICHARD'S DOOR OPENS)
501
00:19:47,843 --> 00:19:51,011
Richard, I'll expect
you off the premises
502
00:19:51,113 --> 00:19:52,546
by end of day.
503
00:19:52,648 --> 00:19:54,047
Monica.
504
00:19:56,152 --> 00:19:57,918
- I'll see you later.
- Okay.
505
00:19:58,020 --> 00:20:00,988
You know, you can stay here for one year.
Free rent.
506
00:20:01,090 --> 00:20:02,456
ERLICH: Jian-Yang!
507
00:20:05,961 --> 00:20:07,294
GAVIN: Laurie!
508
00:20:08,364 --> 00:20:11,331
Ah. Gavin.
509
00:20:11,433 --> 00:20:12,900
You know Jack, of course.
510
00:20:13,002 --> 00:20:14,201
That is correct.
511
00:20:14,303 --> 00:20:17,804
Um, Gavin, can we address
the elephant in the room?
512
00:20:18,841 --> 00:20:20,841
- Sorry?
- Pied Piper.
513
00:20:20,943 --> 00:20:23,143
Right. Yes, of course. (CLEARS THROAT)
514
00:20:23,245 --> 00:20:25,546
I am forcing a sale.
515
00:20:25,648 --> 00:20:28,815
Your Maleant dealings demonstrate that
you're still pursuing a middle-out.
516
00:20:28,918 --> 00:20:30,884
Might you be interested
in placing a bid?
517
00:20:30,986 --> 00:20:32,853
Why would he want to bail out Raviga?
518
00:20:32,955 --> 00:20:34,454
You said it yourself,
519
00:20:34,557 --> 00:20:36,423
our compression play is thriving.
520
00:20:36,525 --> 00:20:37,891
Fair enough.
521
00:20:37,993 --> 00:20:39,359
You know what? I'm a completionist.
522
00:20:39,461 --> 00:20:42,296
Even if I buy it just to
throw it in the garbage,
523
00:20:42,398 --> 00:20:44,097
I'd like to be the one
to drive the final nail
524
00:20:44,200 --> 00:20:45,532
in the Hendricks coffin.
525
00:20:45,634 --> 00:20:47,834
I'll give you...
526
00:20:47,937 --> 00:20:49,102
$900 for it?
527
00:20:49,205 --> 00:20:51,638
- (JACK CHUCKLES)
- I believe that is a joke.
528
00:20:51,740 --> 00:20:54,875
You know what? I like
nice, round numbers.
529
00:20:54,977 --> 00:20:57,044
Make it...
530
00:20:57,146 --> 00:20:58,979
a million?
531
00:20:59,081 --> 00:21:00,214
A million dollars?
532
00:21:00,316 --> 00:21:03,951
Gavin Belson gets to buy
Pied Piper for $1 million
533
00:21:04,053 --> 00:21:07,321
and Raviga gets all of it because
of their liquidation preference
534
00:21:07,423 --> 00:21:08,455
and I get jack shit?
535
00:21:08,557 --> 00:21:10,524
Is that what you're telling me?
Goddamn it.
536
00:21:10,626 --> 00:21:12,926
I know this is the last way
that you wanted it to end.
537
00:21:13,028 --> 00:21:14,328
I'm really sorry.
538
00:21:14,430 --> 00:21:16,763
Yeah, well, I...
I'll see you at the meeting.
539
00:21:16,865 --> 00:21:18,832
- (COMPUTER BEEPS)
- Is that Hooli-Chat?
540
00:21:18,934 --> 00:21:20,100
They fix it or something?
541
00:21:20,202 --> 00:21:22,936
- That didn't look shitty at all.
- Actually, it's... it's ours.
542
00:21:23,038 --> 00:21:24,471
Um, the guys hacked it together.
543
00:21:24,573 --> 00:21:25,906
I can send you an invite if you want.
544
00:21:26,008 --> 00:21:27,207
Yeah. Cool. Thanks.
545
00:21:27,309 --> 00:21:30,310
We got up to 4K users
totally organically. Oh.
546
00:21:30,412 --> 00:21:32,746
- (COMPUTER BEEPS)
- Oh, shit! 7K now.
547
00:21:33,949 --> 00:21:36,483
Wow, we should have been
focusing on this instead.
548
00:21:36,585 --> 00:21:37,951
Not that it matters.
549
00:21:38,053 --> 00:21:40,654
I mean, it's all gonna be property
of Gavin Belson in an hour, so.
550
00:21:40,756 --> 00:21:42,556
That's ironic, huh?
551
00:21:43,559 --> 00:21:45,392
N... no, for real, I'm asking. Is it?
552
00:21:45,494 --> 00:21:47,394
I don't know. I was just smiling.
553
00:21:47,496 --> 00:21:49,396
Feels ironic.
554
00:21:50,866 --> 00:21:52,866
Hey, uh, so thank you for, uh...
555
00:21:52,968 --> 00:21:54,635
letting me stay here. No worries.
556
00:21:54,737 --> 00:21:56,937
Steve says you're welcome to
take my spot on the couch
557
00:21:57,039 --> 00:21:59,573
until you can find a job
and get your own place.
558
00:21:59,675 --> 00:22:00,674
Thanks.
559
00:22:00,776 --> 00:22:03,310
So, uh, when's your dad
coming to pick you up?
560
00:22:03,412 --> 00:22:05,312
Uh, a couple of hours I guess.
561
00:22:05,414 --> 00:22:08,081
Then we're turning right around
and going back to Phoenix.
562
00:22:08,183 --> 00:22:09,883
You know, he said he wants to be able
563
00:22:09,985 --> 00:22:12,119
to keep an eye on me and my money
564
00:22:12,221 --> 00:22:13,687
and that I need to get a real job
565
00:22:13,789 --> 00:22:16,056
to learn the value of a...
of a hard day's night
566
00:22:16,158 --> 00:22:18,191
or something like that.
567
00:22:18,294 --> 00:22:20,727
Well, um, I should probably get
going to this board meeting.
568
00:22:20,829 --> 00:22:25,565
Um, and you're probably gonna
be gone when I'm back, so...
569
00:22:25,668 --> 00:22:27,834
- guess this is it.
- Yeah, I guess so.
570
00:22:27,936 --> 00:22:28,969
See ya.
571
00:22:29,071 --> 00:22:30,437
- Oh...
- Oh...
572
00:22:31,507 --> 00:22:32,606
- Okay.
- Okay.
573
00:22:32,708 --> 00:22:35,342
- All right. Cool, man.
- There we go.
574
00:22:42,718 --> 00:22:45,585
Richard, e... even though
it's the last board meeting
575
00:22:45,688 --> 00:22:47,821
and... and essentially meaningless,
576
00:22:47,923 --> 00:22:49,956
thank you for letting
me be a part of it.
577
00:22:50,059 --> 00:22:51,258
It's an honor.
578
00:22:51,360 --> 00:22:52,926
Okay, you don't have
to keep saying that.
579
00:22:52,951 --> 00:22:53,584
(DOOR OPENS)
580
00:22:55,798 --> 00:22:57,698
Good day, all. This should be brief.
581
00:22:57,800 --> 00:23:00,334
The only item on the agenda is,
582
00:23:00,436 --> 00:23:01,635
of course, the authorization
583
00:23:01,737 --> 00:23:03,503
of the sale of Pied Piper
to the current high bidder.
584
00:23:03,605 --> 00:23:05,372
Three "yes" votes will approve the sale.
585
00:23:05,474 --> 00:23:08,108
And as Raviga controls
three of the board seats,
586
00:23:08,210 --> 00:23:09,810
- it seems...
- I'm sorry. I...
587
00:23:11,280 --> 00:23:13,914
- I'm not doing it.
- Oh, Monica, not again.
588
00:23:14,016 --> 00:23:16,183
I'm sorry, but look, Richard
has worked too hard
589
00:23:16,285 --> 00:23:18,552
and I know that I can't stop
it, but I'm not gonna vote
590
00:23:18,654 --> 00:23:20,854
to let Pied Piper become the
property of that asshole.
591
00:23:20,956 --> 00:23:24,591
Monica, I also happen to
find him contemptible.
592
00:23:24,693 --> 00:23:27,794
But Pied Piper will be sold
to the high bidder, period.
593
00:23:27,896 --> 00:23:29,696
You know what? I don't care.
594
00:23:29,798 --> 00:23:31,031
You want to fire me, fire me.
595
00:23:31,133 --> 00:23:33,166
If we're not gonna adhere
to the values that
596
00:23:33,268 --> 00:23:35,936
Peter Gregory instilled, then
I don't think I belong here.
597
00:23:36,038 --> 00:23:37,404
Monica, you don't have to do this.
598
00:23:37,506 --> 00:23:40,474
I'm not voting yes. Very well.
You're off the board.
599
00:23:40,576 --> 00:23:42,376
Excuse me! Man!
600
00:23:44,313 --> 00:23:46,747
- Do you work here?
- Well, it was my first day actually.
601
00:23:46,849 --> 00:23:48,348
- Everybody's been super ni...
- Sit.
602
00:23:48,450 --> 00:23:51,318
You are now officially on the
board of directors of Pied Piper.
603
00:23:51,420 --> 00:23:54,354
Oh, okay. That's fine I guess.
604
00:23:54,456 --> 00:23:55,956
When I point to you, you will vote yes.
605
00:23:56,058 --> 00:23:58,258
Now, I move to vote on
the sale of Pied Piper.
606
00:23:58,360 --> 00:23:59,893
I vote yes.
607
00:23:59,995 --> 00:24:01,695
I vote yes.
608
00:24:01,797 --> 00:24:03,130
And Evan.
609
00:24:04,933 --> 00:24:06,199
Evan?
610
00:24:07,736 --> 00:24:09,035
I can't do it.
611
00:24:09,138 --> 00:24:10,103
What? Why?
612
00:24:10,205 --> 00:24:12,873
Because...
613
00:24:12,975 --> 00:24:14,040
Monica?
614
00:24:15,144 --> 00:24:16,243
I love you.
615
00:24:16,345 --> 00:24:18,478
There. I said it.
616
00:24:18,580 --> 00:24:20,256
And I could never do
anything to make you sad.
617
00:24:20,282 --> 00:24:22,717
Oh, for fuck's sake! Do I have to
pull the receptionist in here?
618
00:24:22,818 --> 00:24:24,885
How does this compare with
a typical board meeting?
619
00:24:24,987 --> 00:24:26,820
All right, stop. Everybody, just stop.
620
00:24:26,922 --> 00:24:28,722
We all know how this is gonna go,
621
00:24:28,824 --> 00:24:29,990
so let's just get it over with.
622
00:24:30,092 --> 00:24:31,091
All right?
623
00:24:31,193 --> 00:24:33,093
Um, I vote yes. There.
624
00:24:33,195 --> 00:24:34,694
Okay? I approve the sale.
625
00:24:34,797 --> 00:24:37,497
Three "yes" votes. Can
this please just be done?
626
00:24:37,599 --> 00:24:38,465
Very well.
627
00:24:38,567 --> 00:24:41,268
- I vote yes also.
- Irrelevant.
628
00:24:41,370 --> 00:24:42,269
But thank you.
629
00:24:42,371 --> 00:24:43,603
The sale is approved.
630
00:24:43,705 --> 00:24:46,072
Pied Piper, its IP,
and all of its assets
631
00:24:46,175 --> 00:24:49,276
are now officially the
property of Bachmanity, LLC.
632
00:24:50,579 --> 00:24:53,213
Wait, sorry, did...
633
00:24:53,315 --> 00:24:56,249
did you just say "Bachmanity"?
634
00:24:56,351 --> 00:24:59,219
As in Erlich Bachman
and Nelson Bighetti?
635
00:24:59,321 --> 00:25:00,720
Yes, you know them.
636
00:25:00,823 --> 00:25:03,290
They... wait, they...
they had the highest bid?
637
00:25:03,392 --> 00:25:07,127
I received a telephone call
approximately 30 minutes ago
638
00:25:07,229 --> 00:25:10,330
entering a bid of one million and one
dollars with a firm no-shop clause.
639
00:25:10,432 --> 00:25:13,900
So when you were referring to the
person who bought Pied Piper
640
00:25:14,002 --> 00:25:17,838
as a contemptible asshole, you
were talking about Erlich?
641
00:25:17,940 --> 00:25:22,142
To which contemptible asshole
did you think I was referring?
642
00:25:22,244 --> 00:25:23,510
Gavin Belson.
643
00:25:23,612 --> 00:25:24,945
Oh.
644
00:25:26,248 --> 00:25:28,048
I see. No.
645
00:25:28,150 --> 00:25:30,250
This meeting is adjourned.
646
00:25:30,352 --> 00:25:32,853
I thank you all for your time.
647
00:25:34,323 --> 00:25:35,422
(CHUCKLES)
648
00:25:35,524 --> 00:25:38,158
So... Bachmanity it is.
649
00:25:38,260 --> 00:25:41,161
(ALL CHUCKLE)
650
00:25:41,263 --> 00:25:42,295
That's good.
651
00:25:42,397 --> 00:25:46,233
So... should we give this thing a shot?
652
00:25:55,010 --> 00:25:56,343
(DOOR CLOSES)
653
00:25:57,946 --> 00:25:59,579
You and Big Head, huh?
654
00:26:02,217 --> 00:26:03,950
Um...
655
00:26:04,052 --> 00:26:06,920
sorry you had to cancel your trip.
656
00:26:07,022 --> 00:26:09,890
And look, I...
I really appreciate all this.
657
00:26:09,992 --> 00:26:13,827
I really think this video chat thing
is gonna be something, you know?
658
00:26:13,929 --> 00:26:15,106
I don't know if you've seen the numbers.
659
00:26:15,232 --> 00:26:19,199
You want a number? The percentage
I give a fuck about you, zero.
660
00:26:19,301 --> 00:26:20,634
It's trending steady.
661
00:26:20,736 --> 00:26:23,303
And of course I've seen the numbers.
662
00:26:23,405 --> 00:26:24,838
This is a business opportunity.
663
00:26:24,940 --> 00:26:26,907
Nothing more. Big Head was your friend.
664
00:26:27,009 --> 00:26:29,743
He was the one that,
uh, talked me into it.
665
00:26:31,547 --> 00:26:33,413
I don't trust you, Richard Hendricks.
666
00:26:35,050 --> 00:26:38,585
And it's gonna take a
long, long, long time
667
00:26:38,687 --> 00:26:40,253
to regain my trust.
668
00:26:40,355 --> 00:26:41,855
Are we clear?
669
00:26:43,559 --> 00:26:46,226
Are we absolutely clear?
670
00:26:46,803 --> 00:26:48,152
PEOPLE: (CHANTING) Always blue!
Always blue!
671
00:26:48,230 --> 00:26:49,796
Always blue! Always blue!
672
00:26:49,898 --> 00:26:51,464
Always blue! Always blue!
673
00:26:51,567 --> 00:26:52,832
- Always blue! Alway...
- Aah!
674
00:26:52,935 --> 00:26:53,800
(ALL GROAN)
675
00:26:53,902 --> 00:26:55,268
- GILFOYLE: You suck.
- (PHONE CHIMES)
676
00:26:55,370 --> 00:26:59,172
Oh, fuck, it's my dad again.
He's gotta be so pissed.
677
00:26:59,274 --> 00:27:00,707
I can't believe this is
happening, you guys.
678
00:27:00,809 --> 00:27:02,876
I mean, I guess now we're
a video chat company,
679
00:27:02,978 --> 00:27:05,045
but the best part of it
is it's us, you know?
680
00:27:05,147 --> 00:27:07,314
Just us controlling our own destiny.
681
00:27:07,416 --> 00:27:09,249
No, the best part of it is I own 50%.
682
00:27:09,351 --> 00:27:10,984
- (ERLICH CHUCKLES)
- RICHARD: Well, yes,
683
00:27:11,086 --> 00:27:13,486
um, you and Big Head do
own the entire company,
684
00:27:13,589 --> 00:27:15,288
but I am the founder, it's my algorithm,
685
00:27:15,390 --> 00:27:17,657
so I'm assuming I'm getting my
original shares back, right?
686
00:27:17,759 --> 00:27:19,059
Why would you assume that?
687
00:27:19,161 --> 00:27:20,994
Well, when a tech company reboots,
688
00:27:21,096 --> 00:27:23,129
it's normal to have a... a conversation
689
00:27:23,231 --> 00:27:24,698
about restructuring the cap table.
690
00:27:24,800 --> 00:27:28,134
Good, 'cause I'm the guy that
hacked together the video chat app
691
00:27:28,236 --> 00:27:30,003
to see if that woman was hot, so...
692
00:27:30,105 --> 00:27:34,074
Yeah, but it's not gonna scale until I get
in there and scrape all the Dinesh off.
693
00:27:34,176 --> 00:27:37,143
Well, Laurie still hasn't called
me back, so I may need a new job.
694
00:27:37,245 --> 00:27:40,547
And I'm assuming Pied Piper
can't afford my salary,
695
00:27:40,649 --> 00:27:41,915
so I'll need stock.
696
00:27:42,017 --> 00:27:44,784
Do we really want it to be
called Pied Piper anymore?
697
00:27:44,886 --> 00:27:47,087
No, yes. Of cour...
of... of course we want...
698
00:27:47,189 --> 00:27:48,989
Why do we want to change the name?
It's great.
699
00:27:49,091 --> 00:27:51,458
Yeah, and we do already
have the jackets.
700
00:27:51,560 --> 00:27:54,361
Big. Head.
701
00:27:54,463 --> 00:27:55,495
(ERLICH'S PHONE CHIMES)
702
00:27:55,597 --> 00:27:56,796
Big Head.
703
00:27:57,866 --> 00:27:58,798
Go for Erlich.
704
00:27:58,900 --> 00:28:01,968
Erlich Bachman, this
is you as an old man.
705
00:28:02,070 --> 00:28:06,673
I'm ugly and I'm dead. Alone.
706
00:28:07,876 --> 00:28:09,175
I'm gonna let him have this one.
707
00:28:09,277 --> 00:28:10,176
All right, uh...
708
00:28:10,278 --> 00:28:12,379
well, I'm sorry to hear that, Future Me.
709
00:28:12,481 --> 00:28:13,380
What a terrible thing.
710
00:28:13,482 --> 00:28:15,181
I'll talk to you in several years.
711
00:28:15,283 --> 00:28:16,316
DINESH: You're up.
712
00:28:16,418 --> 00:28:18,118
(ALL CHANTING) Always blue! Always blue!
713
00:28:18,220 --> 00:28:20,120
- Always blue!
- Always blue!
714
00:28:20,222 --> 00:28:22,122
Always blue! Always blue!
715
00:28:22,224 --> 00:28:24,190
- Always blue!
- Always blue!
716
00:28:24,292 --> 00:28:25,392
Always blue!
717
00:28:25,494 --> 00:28:27,627
♪ Living in the big city,
the American dream ♪
718
00:28:27,729 --> 00:28:29,796
♪ Is far from me and the
streets of gritty ♪
719
00:28:29,898 --> 00:28:32,298
♪ Everywhere I turn I'm
on a mission for more ♪
720
00:28:32,401 --> 00:28:33,633
♪ But I ain't selling my soul ♪
721
00:28:33,735 --> 00:28:34,968
♪ For the dope, that's no bull ♪
722
00:28:35,070 --> 00:28:36,670
♪ I'm on a one-way rise to the top ♪
723
00:28:36,772 --> 00:28:38,905
♪ I'm hitting the strip
but got a sound ♪
724
00:28:39,007 --> 00:28:40,373
♪ That will rattle your block ♪
725
00:28:40,475 --> 00:28:42,442
♪ This life that I live,
it ain't for the weak ♪
726
00:28:42,544 --> 00:28:45,345
♪ I'm a rowdy-ass gangster
that came off the street ♪
727
00:28:45,447 --> 00:28:47,781
♪ I'm trying to keep the peace
but I gotta keep my beats ♪
728
00:28:47,883 --> 00:28:50,483
♪ Got these punk-ass
police, want me R.I.P. ♪
729
00:28:50,585 --> 00:28:52,085
♪ And I'm searching for
that higher ground ♪
730
00:28:52,187 --> 00:28:53,687
♪ I want my head in the sky ♪
731
00:28:53,789 --> 00:28:55,588
♪ So high that I can't come down ♪
732
00:28:55,691 --> 00:28:58,258
♪ Legalized in every
town across the nation ♪
733
00:28:58,360 --> 00:29:00,260
♪ 'Cause you can never stop the blaze ♪
734
00:29:00,362 --> 00:29:03,830
- ♪ Gotta rise up to the top ♪
- ♪ To the top ♪
735
00:29:03,932 --> 00:29:05,799
- ♪ Can't stop ♪
- ♪ How high can you get? ♪
736
00:29:05,901 --> 00:29:09,102
- ♪ Gotta rise up to the top ♪
- ♪ To the top ♪
737
00:29:09,204 --> 00:29:11,137
- ♪ Can't stop ♪
- ♪ How high can you get? ♪
738
00:29:11,239 --> 00:29:13,573
♪ 'Cause what goes up must come down ♪
739
00:29:13,675 --> 00:29:16,209
♪ So we gotta rise up
to the higher ground ♪
740
00:29:16,311 --> 00:29:17,644
- ♪ Rise up ♪
- ♪ Rise up ♪
741
00:29:17,746 --> 00:29:18,945
- ♪ Rise up ♪
- ♪ Rise up ♪
742
00:29:19,047 --> 00:29:20,413
- ♪ Rise up ♪
- ♪ Rise up ♪
743
00:29:20,515 --> 00:29:21,915
♪ How high can you get? ♪
744
00:29:22,017 --> 00:29:23,883
♪ What goes up must come down ♪
745
00:29:23,985 --> 00:29:26,419
♪ So we gotta rise up
to the higher ground ♪
746
00:29:26,521 --> 00:29:28,021
- ♪ Rise up ♪
- ♪ Rise up ♪
747
00:29:28,123 --> 00:29:30,123
♪ How high can you get? ♪
55506
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