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1
00:00:17,851 --> 00:00:20,338
Danny, don't splash me!
2
00:00:20,368 --> 00:00:22,826
Stop. I'm getting wet.
3
00:00:22,856 --> 00:00:26,659
That's the idea.
4
00:00:27,494 --> 00:00:29,262
- Stop it.
- Hi, sweetie.
5
00:00:29,292 --> 00:00:30,467
Oh, come on!
6
00:00:30,497 --> 00:00:32,465
Come on,
let's go back to my place.
7
00:00:32,495 --> 00:00:34,217
Maybe we should wait.
8
00:00:34,247 --> 00:00:35,969
Wait, schmait!
9
00:00:37,670 --> 00:00:39,175
These two people
are not married,
10
00:00:39,205 --> 00:00:41,541
and they're going
to have premarital sex.
11
00:00:41,571 --> 00:00:43,179
You could go to hell for that.
12
00:00:43,209 --> 00:00:44,778
All right, that's it.
You're not allowed
13
00:00:44,808 --> 00:00:46,996
to watch this show anymore.
14
00:00:47,026 --> 00:00:49,185
It inspires urges that are...
15
00:00:49,215 --> 00:00:52,619
- wrong and bad.
- Let's go to your place.
16
00:00:52,649 --> 00:00:53,356
Groovy!
17
00:00:53,386 --> 00:00:55,588
You could go to hell
for those urges.
18
00:00:59,325 --> 00:01:01,765
In hell, there is a fire
19
00:01:01,795 --> 00:01:05,832
that will lap at you
for all eternity.
20
00:01:05,862 --> 00:01:07,737
You gotta decide...
21
00:01:07,767 --> 00:01:12,572
Do you want to go to heaven,
or do you wanna go to hell?
22
00:01:16,409 --> 00:01:19,612
Yeah. You a bad girl? Huh?
You a bad girl?
23
00:01:19,642 --> 00:01:21,184
- I'm a bad girl.
- Yeah!
24
00:01:21,214 --> 00:01:23,783
You're a dirty little slut, huh?
Dirty little slut,
25
00:01:23,813 --> 00:01:24,954
- yeah.
- Um, yes.
26
00:01:24,984 --> 00:01:25,922
Say it. Say you're a dirty slut.
27
00:01:25,952 --> 00:01:29,089
- I'm a dirty slut.
- Yeah, you're a dirty slut!
28
00:01:45,004 --> 00:01:46,473
Okay.
29
00:01:52,479 --> 00:01:54,981
Why do you always call me
a dirty little slut?
30
00:01:56,015 --> 00:01:58,388
Come on. You love it.
31
00:01:58,418 --> 00:02:00,090
I like having sex on a bed.
32
00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:02,455
Is this because maybe
you're, uh, you're jealous
33
00:02:02,485 --> 00:02:03,773
that I'm more successful
than you?
34
00:02:03,803 --> 00:02:05,061
Mr. Brock,
35
00:02:05,091 --> 00:02:06,062
we're ready for you onstage.
36
00:02:06,092 --> 00:02:09,395
Peter, you have been in one
great movie after another.
37
00:02:09,425 --> 00:02:11,347
Walk me through your process.
38
00:02:11,377 --> 00:02:13,299
How do you prepare for this?
39
00:02:13,566 --> 00:02:16,136
I tell you,
I play a lot of action heroes.
40
00:02:16,166 --> 00:02:17,006
Um...
41
00:02:17,036 --> 00:02:18,641
and in those... in those movies,
42
00:02:18,671 --> 00:02:21,207
I have heavy artillery.
I have guns,
43
00:02:21,237 --> 00:02:22,642
okay?
44
00:02:23,476 --> 00:02:25,612
I have a gun on me right now.
45
00:02:25,812 --> 00:02:27,784
Not physically,
in the physical sense.
46
00:02:27,814 --> 00:02:30,216
I put it on the table earlier.
It's right here.
47
00:02:30,246 --> 00:02:31,287
Imagine it, okay?
48
00:02:31,317 --> 00:02:34,254
- It's an emotional gun for me.
- Right.
49
00:02:34,284 --> 00:02:35,922
This gun's here...
50
00:02:35,952 --> 00:02:36,860
all the time.
51
00:02:36,890 --> 00:02:39,826
Sometimes I put it in my pocket,
sometimes I put it in my...
52
00:02:39,856 --> 00:02:42,311
That's how I prepare.
I'm always ready.
53
00:02:42,341 --> 00:02:44,797
I'm always the action hero.
Bang! Not real.
54
00:02:44,827 --> 00:02:46,332
But real.
55
00:02:46,466 --> 00:02:48,134
- Uh...
- I'll do it.
56
00:02:48,164 --> 00:02:49,252
Don't do it.
57
00:02:49,282 --> 00:02:50,340
I won't do it.
58
00:02:50,370 --> 00:02:52,390
You've been doing this
for years, and years and years.
59
00:02:52,420 --> 00:02:54,440
Certainly, you've heard some
of the talk on the streets.
60
00:02:54,470 --> 00:02:56,746
People say that Peter is
just a tough guy,
61
00:02:56,776 --> 00:03:00,264
a hard guy to work with.
How do you respond to that?
62
00:03:00,294 --> 00:03:03,783
Yeah, Napoleon died exiled
on an island of... of leprosy.
63
00:03:03,813 --> 00:03:04,787
That's... that's true.
64
00:03:04,817 --> 00:03:05,822
- That's history.
- Yeah.
65
00:03:05,852 --> 00:03:09,055
Jesus died on the cross,
you know?
66
00:03:09,122 --> 00:03:10,660
Um, visionaries die
67
00:03:10,690 --> 00:03:13,693
sometimes quicker
than non-visionaries.
68
00:03:13,723 --> 00:03:14,497
You're a visionary?
69
00:03:14,527 --> 00:03:15,765
Thank you.
But I'm not saying...
70
00:03:15,795 --> 00:03:17,698
- Oh, you're asking. I think...
- It was a question.
71
00:03:17,728 --> 00:03:19,632
...um, I think that's up
for kinda the press to decide,
72
00:03:19,662 --> 00:03:20,570
and I think that bloggers,
73
00:03:20,600 --> 00:03:22,602
and people
who write physical magazines
74
00:03:22,632 --> 00:03:23,873
have said I was a... a visionary.
75
00:03:23,903 --> 00:03:25,605
People have...
have tweeted me about that.
76
00:03:25,635 --> 00:03:27,039
You know,
you made Bros Before Hos.
77
00:03:27,069 --> 00:03:28,444
Why don't you make
the female version?
78
00:03:28,474 --> 00:03:30,543
I... I wrote a great script.
It's called Chicks Before Dicks.
79
00:03:30,573 --> 00:03:32,128
- Did you read it?
- Uh, look, Boo Boo,
80
00:03:32,158 --> 00:03:33,504
you have all the talent.
You really do.
81
00:03:33,534 --> 00:03:34,876
And I'm the one
that discovered you
82
00:03:34,906 --> 00:03:36,249
and gave you
your big break, right?
83
00:03:36,279 --> 00:03:37,253
- Yeah.
- Yeah, I promoted you
84
00:03:37,283 --> 00:03:38,970
- to be my D girl, right?
- I want to be a writer.
85
00:03:39,000 --> 00:03:40,657
I know you want to be a writer,
and in due time.
86
00:03:40,687 --> 00:03:43,356
Really. Your writing is great.
It's fresh and very unique.
87
00:03:43,386 --> 00:03:44,360
But you're bogging yourself down
88
00:03:44,390 --> 00:03:46,162
talking about stupid shit.
You know what? You...
89
00:03:46,192 --> 00:03:48,246
Nobody wants to hear about
women's stories, all right?
90
00:03:48,276 --> 00:03:50,072
If you want to make a film,
you got to talk about a man.
91
00:03:50,102 --> 00:03:51,868
You gotta write about a man.
That's what you have to do.
92
00:03:51,898 --> 00:03:53,833
Well, can you read my script?
It's called The Year of My Yoni.
93
00:03:53,863 --> 00:03:55,701
It's about a woman
who goes on a spiritual quest
94
00:03:55,731 --> 00:03:57,570
to find happiness
and to learn about her yoni.
95
00:03:57,600 --> 00:03:58,741
Yoni? I don't even know
what that is.
96
00:03:58,771 --> 00:04:00,257
Is that, like, a new way
of saying "vagina"?
97
00:04:00,287 --> 00:04:02,534
It sounds like a porno.
I'm not into it.
98
00:04:02,564 --> 00:04:05,074
Look, a guy
bashing another guy's skull in
99
00:04:05,104 --> 00:04:07,614
with a baseball bat,
that's what sells.
100
00:04:09,015 --> 00:04:11,385
Well, I could change the title
to The Ultra-Violent Yoni.
101
00:04:11,415 --> 00:04:13,786
You know, that's a good start.
You could put more violence
102
00:04:13,816 --> 00:04:15,054
in your script,
that'd definitely get
103
00:04:15,084 --> 00:04:16,292
a better chance
of getting it made. Um,
104
00:04:16,322 --> 00:04:18,124
on my end, I'm gonna put
more female characters
105
00:04:18,154 --> 00:04:19,696
- in my next script.
- Really?
106
00:04:19,726 --> 00:04:22,028
Yeah, uh,
it's called Kill the Sluts.
107
00:04:22,058 --> 00:04:23,132
Uh, I'm gonna pick a title
108
00:04:23,162 --> 00:04:24,300
that's more PC
a little bit later.
109
00:04:24,330 --> 00:04:26,336
That's a working title.
But basically, uh,
110
00:04:26,366 --> 00:04:28,968
the movie's about this crazy
psychopathic killer
111
00:04:28,998 --> 00:04:29,939
that goes on a killing rampage
112
00:04:29,969 --> 00:04:31,489
and kills
all these teenage sluts.
113
00:04:31,519 --> 00:04:33,039
But the only person
that he can't kill
114
00:04:33,069 --> 00:04:34,477
is an 18-year-old virgin.
115
00:04:34,507 --> 00:04:37,076
Don't you think that'll send
out a weird message to women
116
00:04:37,106 --> 00:04:38,811
and teenage girls about sex?
And those women
117
00:04:38,841 --> 00:04:40,396
might grow up
and have a lot of issues.
118
00:04:40,426 --> 00:04:42,056
I'm not saying
I'm against women's rights.
119
00:04:42,086 --> 00:04:43,716
I'm just saying that
there's no market
120
00:04:43,746 --> 00:04:45,084
for their films.
121
00:05:57,357 --> 00:05:59,992
Hello!
122
00:06:01,127 --> 00:06:02,962
- Welcome!
- Welcome, goddess!
123
00:06:02,992 --> 00:06:04,613
Is this your first time?
124
00:06:04,643 --> 00:06:06,373
- I guess so.
- Are you ready
125
00:06:06,403 --> 00:06:08,938
to uncover your deepest desires
126
00:06:08,968 --> 00:06:11,474
and join
the pleasure revolution?
127
00:06:11,504 --> 00:06:13,873
- I don't know.
- That's good enough for now.
128
00:06:13,903 --> 00:06:16,208
You are in exactly
the right place.
129
00:06:16,238 --> 00:06:18,544
- Yes! Welcome!
- Oh.
130
00:06:19,979 --> 00:06:23,451
Fear! So what?
131
00:06:23,481 --> 00:06:26,923
Failure! So what?
132
00:06:26,953 --> 00:06:29,555
My pussy is strong!
133
00:06:29,822 --> 00:06:32,126
My pussy is strong!
134
00:06:32,156 --> 00:06:37,300
My pussy is a genius!
135
00:06:37,330 --> 00:06:41,237
We must listen to our pussies.
136
00:06:41,267 --> 00:06:45,772
We must listen
to our pussies.
137
00:06:48,975 --> 00:06:50,810
Ladies, I would now like
to introduce you
138
00:06:50,840 --> 00:06:54,814
to a dear friend of mine,
my mentor,
139
00:06:54,844 --> 00:06:58,818
Dr. Christiane Northrup!
140
00:07:00,887 --> 00:07:02,989
- What a pleasure.
- Thank you.
141
00:07:03,019 --> 00:07:05,091
Thank you. Thank you.
142
00:07:05,121 --> 00:07:06,496
All right...
143
00:07:06,526 --> 00:07:07,797
I have something...
144
00:07:07,827 --> 00:07:11,264
really magical to tell you.
145
00:07:12,131 --> 00:07:15,067
I love my breasts.
146
00:07:15,139 --> 00:07:16,339
Say it with me.
147
00:07:16,369 --> 00:07:20,276
I love my breasts.
148
00:07:20,306 --> 00:07:21,644
I love your breasts, too, Chris.
149
00:07:21,674 --> 00:07:25,711
- And I love yours. Thank you.
- Oh, thank you.
150
00:07:25,741 --> 00:07:26,816
Now it is time to honor
151
00:07:26,846 --> 00:07:28,518
the breasts of the women
in the room.
152
00:07:28,548 --> 00:07:31,784
I would like you to turn
to the person next to you,
153
00:07:31,814 --> 00:07:34,357
and look at her breasts
and say,
154
00:07:34,387 --> 00:07:39,492
"Your bodacious ta-tas honor
me and they honor you. "
155
00:07:39,522 --> 00:07:41,561
Find... everybody find
a partner, please.
156
00:07:43,963 --> 00:07:46,365
Excuse me, could you...
could you be my partner?
157
00:07:46,395 --> 00:07:47,603
- Yes, sure.
- Okay.
158
00:07:47,633 --> 00:07:48,738
Hi! I don't have a partner.
159
00:07:48,768 --> 00:07:50,903
Is it possible we could do
a three-way?
160
00:07:50,933 --> 00:07:51,841
I've never done a three-way.
161
00:07:51,871 --> 00:07:54,774
This is my third time
taking the class.
162
00:07:54,874 --> 00:07:56,444
First time...
163
00:07:56,474 --> 00:07:58,014
I liked my boobs.
164
00:07:58,044 --> 00:08:01,180
Second time, I loved my boobs.
165
00:08:01,210 --> 00:08:01,918
Now...
166
00:08:01,948 --> 00:08:05,284
I really, really
love my boobs.
167
00:08:05,314 --> 00:08:06,456
- Mm!
- Wow.
168
00:08:06,486 --> 00:08:09,856
Yeah. This is a powerful
exercise to release the shame
169
00:08:09,886 --> 00:08:12,625
that we carry
in our sexual organs.
170
00:08:12,655 --> 00:08:13,963
Okay!
171
00:08:13,993 --> 00:08:18,531
Your bodacious ta-tas honor me
and they honor you.
172
00:08:19,265 --> 00:08:23,102
Your bodacious ta-tas honor me
and they honor you.
173
00:08:23,173 --> 00:08:24,373
Okay!
174
00:08:24,403 --> 00:08:27,940
Your bodacious ta-tas honor me
and they honor you.
175
00:08:27,970 --> 00:08:30,993
Wow! This is my first
lesbian experience.
176
00:08:31,023 --> 00:08:34,046
I didn't know I had it in me.
177
00:08:34,076 --> 00:08:35,084
Okay. I...
178
00:08:35,114 --> 00:08:36,949
are you Eva St. Claire
the designer?
179
00:08:36,979 --> 00:08:38,254
- Yes.
- Wow, I'm...
180
00:08:38,284 --> 00:08:41,754
Why are you in this class?
You seem so together.
181
00:08:42,474 --> 00:08:43,674
Believe me...
182
00:08:43,704 --> 00:08:44,861
I have issues.
183
00:08:44,891 --> 00:08:46,644
That is now the end
of the class
184
00:08:46,674 --> 00:08:48,427
for the Divine
Feminine Workshop.
185
00:08:48,457 --> 00:08:50,463
We will be meeting next week
186
00:08:50,493 --> 00:08:51,100
to worship
187
00:08:51,130 --> 00:08:54,300
and decorate our pussies.
188
00:08:56,035 --> 00:08:57,737
Thank you.
189
00:08:59,772 --> 00:09:02,993
Pussy! Pussy!
Pussy! Pussy!
190
00:09:03,023 --> 00:09:06,215
This class changed my life.
191
00:09:06,245 --> 00:09:09,016
This class,
my color-therapy workshops,
192
00:09:09,046 --> 00:09:11,817
and my past-life
regression conferences.
193
00:09:12,285 --> 00:09:13,956
- What's color therapy?
- Oh!
194
00:09:13,986 --> 00:09:16,756
It's about how certain colors
make you feel.
195
00:09:17,356 --> 00:09:19,158
That sounds helpful.
196
00:09:19,188 --> 00:09:19,695
Oh!
197
00:09:19,725 --> 00:09:22,329
Do you guys want to come
to the place where I work?
198
00:09:22,359 --> 00:09:24,964
I cast magical spells to make
your dreams come true.
199
00:09:24,994 --> 00:09:26,035
I'm a hope-ologist.
200
00:09:26,065 --> 00:09:28,701
- What's a hope-ologist?
- I just made that word up.
201
00:09:28,731 --> 00:09:29,472
Isn't it awesome?
202
00:09:29,502 --> 00:09:33,472
I believe in the religion
of hope, or hope-ology.
203
00:09:33,502 --> 00:09:34,677
I just made that up, too!
204
00:09:34,707 --> 00:09:37,443
I just spent an hour
singing about my pussy,
205
00:09:37,473 --> 00:09:38,614
so why the hell not?
206
00:09:38,644 --> 00:09:40,313
Yeah, I mean, it's either that
or going home
207
00:09:40,343 --> 00:09:41,781
to think about how much
I hate myself,
208
00:09:41,811 --> 00:09:44,750
- so let's do it.
- Let's do it!
209
00:09:44,780 --> 00:09:48,170
♪ Sha-ba-lum ah-ooh
Sha-ba-lum ♪
210
00:09:48,200 --> 00:09:51,591
♪ Ah-ooh sha-ba-lum
Ah-ooh ♪
211
00:09:51,621 --> 00:09:53,359
This place is really cool.
212
00:09:53,389 --> 00:09:54,760
Okay.
213
00:09:55,632 --> 00:09:56,832
So...
214
00:09:56,862 --> 00:09:58,782
what do you want to wish for?
215
00:09:58,812 --> 00:10:00,703
- How does it work?
- Oh...
216
00:10:00,733 --> 00:10:03,502
I carve these candles
and cast spells on them.
217
00:10:03,532 --> 00:10:05,704
I don't know
if it's positive intention
218
00:10:05,734 --> 00:10:08,340
or creative visualization
or actual magic,
219
00:10:08,370 --> 00:10:11,226
but these spells work
for a lot of people.
220
00:10:11,256 --> 00:10:14,113
Some of my regulars
call me The Witch.
221
00:10:14,547 --> 00:10:16,485
- What kind of spells?
- Oh! All kinds.
222
00:10:16,515 --> 00:10:19,703
Some for serious stuff, like
for love, or work and stuff,
223
00:10:19,733 --> 00:10:22,922
but some fun ones, too, like,
"I want my own unicorn. "
224
00:10:22,952 --> 00:10:24,093
They aren't magical.
225
00:10:24,123 --> 00:10:26,125
They're overpriced candles
for rich idiots
226
00:10:26,155 --> 00:10:27,493
who got nothing better to do.
227
00:10:27,523 --> 00:10:28,831
Your paycheck's on my desk.
228
00:10:28,861 --> 00:10:30,262
Can you take out the trash
while you're at it?
229
00:10:30,292 --> 00:10:31,831
I don't want
the rats getting in there.
230
00:10:31,861 --> 00:10:33,169
Sorry, Mr. J.
231
00:10:33,199 --> 00:10:35,319
Did Mr. Fun Time
just call us idiots?
232
00:10:35,349 --> 00:10:37,345
What an asshole.
I think some people
233
00:10:37,375 --> 00:10:39,359
just don't have
enough imagination.
234
00:10:39,389 --> 00:10:41,374
Honey,
I think you should go first.
235
00:10:41,404 --> 00:10:43,279
Okay. Um, hmm.
236
00:10:43,309 --> 00:10:45,478
Well, I want to have hot sex
with someone
237
00:10:45,508 --> 00:10:46,983
who's really nice to me.
238
00:10:47,013 --> 00:10:51,317
Hot sex. Yes. Give it to me!
I want that, too.
239
00:10:51,347 --> 00:10:55,354
I want to not fall asleep
during sex.
240
00:10:55,384 --> 00:10:57,156
I want to be awake.
241
00:10:57,990 --> 00:10:59,228
I want to be...
242
00:10:59,258 --> 00:11:01,097
an active part of it.
243
00:11:01,127 --> 00:11:04,196
- Okay, I want in. I want in!
- Okay.
244
00:11:04,234 --> 00:11:05,434
Um...
245
00:11:05,464 --> 00:11:08,034
I'm gonna use the red candle
246
00:11:08,064 --> 00:11:09,635
for passion.
247
00:11:09,665 --> 00:11:10,606
So...
248
00:11:10,636 --> 00:11:12,341
you hold the candle
and you think
249
00:11:12,371 --> 00:11:15,107
about what you want
to release from your life,
250
00:11:15,137 --> 00:11:18,177
and then
think about what you want.
251
00:11:18,310 --> 00:11:20,946
Picture the hot sex.
252
00:11:25,151 --> 00:11:26,686
Okay.
253
00:11:26,716 --> 00:11:27,490
All right.
254
00:11:27,520 --> 00:11:29,855
I want to have
the hottest sex I've ever had
255
00:11:29,885 --> 00:11:32,825
with someone
who's really nice to me.
256
00:11:34,226 --> 00:11:36,062
And so mote it be.
257
00:11:36,092 --> 00:11:36,732
"Mote"?
258
00:11:36,762 --> 00:11:39,932
It's witch talk
for "and so shall it be. "
259
00:11:40,099 --> 00:11:41,569
Witch talk.
260
00:11:41,599 --> 00:11:43,069
I like it.
261
00:11:43,099 --> 00:11:43,939
Okay.
262
00:11:43,969 --> 00:11:47,373
You guys, I really just want
my ex-husband back.
263
00:11:47,403 --> 00:11:49,875
I don't need hot sex.
264
00:11:49,905 --> 00:11:50,546
I mean, like...
265
00:11:50,576 --> 00:11:53,979
room-temperature-warm sex
would be nice
266
00:11:54,009 --> 00:11:56,215
for me. Here we go.
267
00:11:56,415 --> 00:12:00,453
And so mote it be.
268
00:12:00,991 --> 00:12:02,191
Hmm.
269
00:12:02,221 --> 00:12:04,557
I want hot sex with Daniel.
270
00:12:04,657 --> 00:12:06,759
- So mote it be.
- So mote it be.
271
00:12:13,332 --> 00:12:16,836
Okay, I don't know
if all of this is BS,
272
00:12:16,866 --> 00:12:18,340
but I actually feel better.
273
00:12:18,370 --> 00:12:21,240
Oh, my God, I'm invited
to a fun party tonight!
274
00:12:21,270 --> 00:12:22,908
Do you guys want to go with me?
275
00:12:22,938 --> 00:12:24,113
- Yeah!
- Yeah!
276
00:12:24,143 --> 00:12:27,279
♪ I got the light ♪
277
00:12:27,913 --> 00:12:30,883
♪ I got the light ♪
278
00:12:31,751 --> 00:12:34,420
♪ I got the light ♪
279
00:12:35,554 --> 00:12:38,357
♪ I got the light ♪
280
00:12:39,158 --> 00:12:42,328
♪ I got the light ♪
281
00:12:43,562 --> 00:12:44,800
♪ I got the light ♪
282
00:12:44,830 --> 00:12:47,099
- Oh, my God.
- Wait for it.
283
00:12:47,129 --> 00:12:48,767
♪ I got the light ♪
284
00:12:48,797 --> 00:12:50,436
Oh, yeah! Here we go.
285
00:12:50,466 --> 00:12:53,175
Ah!
286
00:12:53,205 --> 00:12:57,076
Oh, my God! Amazing!
287
00:12:57,548 --> 00:12:58,748
Hi!
288
00:12:58,778 --> 00:13:01,147
♪ I got the light ♪
289
00:13:09,221 --> 00:13:10,421
Oh, my God.
290
00:13:17,863 --> 00:13:21,300
♪ I got the light ♪
291
00:13:21,801 --> 00:13:27,801
♪ I got the light ♪
292
00:13:36,515 --> 00:13:39,084
- Hey!
- Ah!
293
00:13:39,285 --> 00:13:41,420
- Hi!
- It's so good to see you, babe.
294
00:13:41,450 --> 00:13:42,525
Good to see you, too.
295
00:13:42,555 --> 00:13:44,623
And who is your gorgeous friend?
296
00:13:44,653 --> 00:13:45,327
Oh, uh...
297
00:13:45,357 --> 00:13:47,760
Honey, this is Freedom.
He's a great artist.
298
00:13:47,790 --> 00:13:49,799
He does
these cool light installations.
299
00:13:49,829 --> 00:13:52,464
- Nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you.
300
00:13:53,966 --> 00:13:56,268
I would really love to show you
my art installations.
301
00:13:56,298 --> 00:13:57,573
I would love
to see your art installations.
302
00:13:57,603 --> 00:13:59,972
Yeah, I'd really love to dance
with you right now.
303
00:14:00,002 --> 00:14:01,574
- Okay!
- Yeah.
304
00:14:07,046 --> 00:14:10,149
♪ I got the light ♪
305
00:14:10,482 --> 00:14:13,886
♪ I got the light ♪
306
00:14:14,753 --> 00:14:17,122
♪ I got the light ♪
307
00:14:17,957 --> 00:14:20,993
♪ Oh I got the light ♪
308
00:14:21,560 --> 00:14:24,066
Want to get something to eat?
309
00:14:24,096 --> 00:14:27,299
I... I can't, 'cause I have
to get up early tomorrow,
310
00:14:27,329 --> 00:14:29,568
and I have a boyfriend.
311
00:14:32,858 --> 00:14:34,058
What's that?
312
00:14:34,088 --> 00:14:35,144
"No one...
313
00:14:35,174 --> 00:14:36,278
can take away the dance. "
314
00:14:36,308 --> 00:14:37,928
It's a Spanish saying.
315
00:14:37,958 --> 00:14:39,548
No matter what happens,
316
00:14:39,578 --> 00:14:42,314
we'll always have
this wonderful night...
317
00:14:42,982 --> 00:14:44,485
and our dance.
318
00:14:44,515 --> 00:14:46,018
Oh.
319
00:14:46,352 --> 00:14:48,888
Thanks for your jacket.
320
00:14:49,255 --> 00:14:50,856
That was fun.
321
00:14:50,961 --> 00:14:52,161
♪ I got the light ♪
322
00:14:52,191 --> 00:14:55,329
♪ I got the light ♪
♪ I got the light ♪
323
00:14:55,359 --> 00:14:58,467
The dance lives forever.
324
00:14:58,497 --> 00:15:01,084
Dance lives forever!
325
00:15:01,114 --> 00:15:03,672
♪ I got the light ♪
326
00:15:03,702 --> 00:15:07,758
- ♪ I got the light ♪
- ♪ I got the light ♪
327
00:15:07,788 --> 00:15:11,844
- ♪ I got the light ♪
- ♪ All of the way ♪
328
00:15:11,874 --> 00:15:14,613
♪ I got the light ♪
329
00:15:15,114 --> 00:15:16,934
This is what I want to happen.
I want the slut
330
00:15:16,964 --> 00:15:18,784
to have an orgasm,
and when she has an orgasm
331
00:15:18,814 --> 00:15:20,285
I want the killer to come up
behind her
332
00:15:20,315 --> 00:15:21,757
and just stab her
in the ass, okay?
333
00:15:21,787 --> 00:15:23,822
I want there to be
a lot of blood in this scene.
334
00:15:23,852 --> 00:15:25,294
Like, almost too much,
where you're like...
335
00:15:25,324 --> 00:15:29,194
But... but a lot, but, like...
but, like, almost too much.
336
00:15:29,224 --> 00:15:31,130
I also want there
to be very good dialogue,
337
00:15:31,160 --> 00:15:32,701
okay?
And that's where you come in.
338
00:15:32,731 --> 00:15:34,967
So I want the character to say
something cool, like,
339
00:15:34,997 --> 00:15:36,405
"Fuck you, bitch! Fuck you!"
340
00:15:36,435 --> 00:15:38,522
"Fuck you, bitch. Fuck you. "
Got it.
341
00:15:38,552 --> 00:15:40,639
Do whatever you want to do,
but that.
342
00:15:41,774 --> 00:15:44,613
I'm sick of watching women
get stabbed in movies.
343
00:15:44,643 --> 00:15:48,814
I think it's a great idea,
Peter. I love all your ideas.
344
00:15:49,920 --> 00:15:51,120
So much.
345
00:15:51,150 --> 00:15:53,619
Excuse me, but why does
the woman who enjoys sex
346
00:15:53,649 --> 00:15:55,187
always have to die
in horror films?
347
00:15:55,217 --> 00:15:57,790
Maybe she could fight back.
348
00:15:58,557 --> 00:16:01,527
We could work in some more
nudity that way.
349
00:16:01,557 --> 00:16:02,631
What if the slut fights
the killer
350
00:16:02,661 --> 00:16:05,764
and every orgasm
she has makes her stronger.
351
00:16:05,794 --> 00:16:06,802
That's funny.
352
00:16:06,832 --> 00:16:09,071
I think
we should at least try it.
353
00:16:09,101 --> 00:16:11,003
Well, you know what, John?
I would try that,
354
00:16:11,033 --> 00:16:11,974
but I... I can't... I actually...
355
00:16:12,004 --> 00:16:13,939
I think that that's probably
the worst fucking idea
356
00:16:13,969 --> 00:16:15,357
I've ever heard
in my entire life,
357
00:16:15,387 --> 00:16:16,745
so I probably can't do that one.
358
00:16:16,775 --> 00:16:18,929
I like sluts.
Why do they all have to die?
359
00:16:18,959 --> 00:16:21,113
I mean, nobody kills male sluts
in movies.
360
00:16:21,143 --> 00:16:22,885
I like sluts, too.
361
00:16:22,915 --> 00:16:24,351
Who doesn't like sluts?
362
00:16:24,381 --> 00:16:25,788
Maybe one should live.
363
00:16:25,818 --> 00:16:27,920
Well... Linda, the thing is,
you already approved
364
00:16:27,950 --> 00:16:29,888
- the draft that I wrote, so...
- Who are you?
365
00:16:29,918 --> 00:16:31,660
I'm a development person.
366
00:16:31,690 --> 00:16:34,827
Well, yeah, she was
my old assistant until recently
367
00:16:34,857 --> 00:16:35,831
I promoted her into development
368
00:16:35,861 --> 00:16:38,865
before I realized
what an angry feminist she is.
369
00:16:38,895 --> 00:16:41,900
She's also a writer.
Actually, a really good writer.
370
00:16:41,930 --> 00:16:42,918
Well, we all write.
371
00:16:42,948 --> 00:16:43,906
I want to be a writer.
372
00:16:43,936 --> 00:16:46,205
I'm...
I'm the young assistant.
373
00:16:46,376 --> 00:16:47,576
- Peter's.
- All right,
374
00:16:47,606 --> 00:16:49,144
well, you know,
that's confusing,
375
00:16:49,174 --> 00:16:52,214
but I like this idea.
I think we should explore it.
376
00:16:52,244 --> 00:16:55,581
- Yeah, Linda, but I think...
- Peter, I gave you final cut.
377
00:16:55,611 --> 00:17:00,152
No studio's gonna
offer you that. The slut lives.
378
00:17:00,182 --> 00:17:00,990
Old assistant person,
379
00:17:01,020 --> 00:17:04,456
I would like you and John
to work on the next draft.
380
00:17:04,486 --> 00:17:06,558
Get it to me when you're done.
381
00:17:07,693 --> 00:17:09,765
Linda, if I could just...
382
00:17:09,795 --> 00:17:12,331
Yeah, I have
an appointment in St. Barts
383
00:17:12,361 --> 00:17:14,099
later today.
384
00:17:16,902 --> 00:17:19,256
Excuse me,
but what the hell was that?
385
00:17:19,286 --> 00:17:21,640
Well, when we started
working together,
386
00:17:21,670 --> 00:17:23,158
you said you liked my ideas.
387
00:17:23,188 --> 00:17:24,646
It embarrasses me to think
388
00:17:24,676 --> 00:17:27,312
about the idiotic films
that you want to make.
389
00:17:27,342 --> 00:17:28,250
Thought it was a good idea.
390
00:17:28,280 --> 00:17:30,816
Better than a guy
stabbing a girl in the ass.
391
00:17:30,846 --> 00:17:31,487
Sex and violence
392
00:17:31,517 --> 00:17:34,119
is a proven formula
that makes a profit.
393
00:17:34,149 --> 00:17:35,871
Well, what about...
394
00:17:35,901 --> 00:17:37,593
sex and happiness?
395
00:17:37,623 --> 00:17:39,395
You're embarrassing yourself!
396
00:17:39,425 --> 00:17:41,860
The...
What are you talking about?
397
00:17:42,294 --> 00:17:44,263
I want to break up.
398
00:17:45,497 --> 00:17:47,036
What? Really?
399
00:17:47,066 --> 00:17:49,935
You want to break up with...
with me?
400
00:17:50,002 --> 00:17:51,373
Do you have any idea
401
00:17:51,403 --> 00:17:54,373
how many girls want to sleep
with me right now,
402
00:17:54,403 --> 00:17:56,141
huh? So many.
403
00:17:56,208 --> 00:17:57,446
I'm Peter Brock, okay?
404
00:17:57,476 --> 00:17:59,945
Well, why don't you go have sex
with them?
405
00:18:00,412 --> 00:18:02,849
Yeah, maybe I...
maybe I will, okay?
406
00:18:02,879 --> 00:18:05,317
But, no, you know what?
Actually...
407
00:18:05,347 --> 00:18:06,722
rewind. I break up with you.
408
00:18:06,752 --> 00:18:08,805
Before what you said,
I break up with you
409
00:18:08,835 --> 00:18:10,889
before you said you break up
with me.
410
00:18:10,919 --> 00:18:12,591
It was my idea.
411
00:18:13,358 --> 00:18:14,763
Great idea.
412
00:18:14,793 --> 00:18:16,765
I'm Peter Brock. Look at this.
413
00:18:16,795 --> 00:18:19,865
Look at all...
There's three posters here.
414
00:18:19,895 --> 00:18:20,502
More... I...
415
00:18:20,532 --> 00:18:23,469
There's some behind the door
I didn't even hang up.
416
00:18:23,769 --> 00:18:26,472
You are my honey bunny.
Come here.
417
00:18:27,005 --> 00:18:29,041
You are my honey bunny.
418
00:18:30,442 --> 00:18:31,877
Oh...
419
00:18:34,980 --> 00:18:36,615
Get me a coffee.
420
00:18:43,255 --> 00:18:46,091
Yeah,
but he sounds like a wanker.
421
00:18:46,121 --> 00:18:46,895
Why work for him?
422
00:18:46,925 --> 00:18:48,827
Well, it's hard to find work
in the movie business.
423
00:18:48,857 --> 00:18:51,363
- It's a man's world.
- Yeah,
424
00:18:51,393 --> 00:18:53,799
well, yeah. Huh?
425
00:18:53,829 --> 00:18:55,167
Mm!
426
00:18:55,534 --> 00:18:57,603
Do you like eating
with your hands?
427
00:18:57,633 --> 00:18:58,974
Um, I don't know.
428
00:18:59,004 --> 00:19:02,608
Mm. You know, you can
just feel the food, you know?
429
00:19:02,638 --> 00:19:04,513
Sometimes I just want to eat
like a dog.
430
00:19:04,543 --> 00:19:08,180
Yeah, I just want to put
my face in there, yeah?
431
00:19:09,047 --> 00:19:10,482
Huh?
432
00:19:10,916 --> 00:19:13,285
Mm-mm!
433
00:19:14,891 --> 00:19:16,091
Come on, try it.
434
00:19:16,121 --> 00:19:17,607
Oh, it's so good. Give it a go.
435
00:19:17,637 --> 00:19:19,366
- Come on.
- Oh, no, it's okay.
436
00:19:19,396 --> 00:19:21,126
Come on. You've got to try this.
437
00:19:21,793 --> 00:19:23,295
Come on.
438
00:19:25,097 --> 00:19:27,000
- Mm. Yum.
- Yeah? Right?
439
00:19:27,030 --> 00:19:28,904
- Delicious.
- Yeah.
440
00:19:28,934 --> 00:19:30,869
It's straight from the plate
to your face.
441
00:19:30,899 --> 00:19:32,274
Wow,
it's so much better this way.
442
00:19:32,304 --> 00:19:34,907
It is, absolutely.
I'm gonna join you down here.
443
00:19:34,937 --> 00:19:36,909
Mm! Oh, it's so good! Mm!
444
00:19:36,939 --> 00:19:40,245
I love you.
445
00:19:42,648 --> 00:19:44,316
You know I don't...
446
00:19:44,616 --> 00:19:45,921
want a relationship, right?
447
00:19:45,951 --> 00:19:47,256
You knew that, though, right?
448
00:19:47,286 --> 00:19:48,957
- That's just... That's just...
- Wait.
449
00:19:48,987 --> 00:19:52,124
Well, aren't we already
actually having a relationship?
450
00:19:52,154 --> 00:19:53,525
- I mean...
- I mean, if you wanna...
451
00:19:53,555 --> 00:19:54,826
...we've been dating
for two years
452
00:19:54,856 --> 00:19:56,098
and you just told me
you loved me.
453
00:19:56,128 --> 00:20:00,766
Oh, Yeah, well, you know, I...
Yeah, I love you, you know, I...
454
00:20:00,796 --> 00:20:04,903
I love you as a sister,
you know, as a friend, and...
455
00:20:04,933 --> 00:20:07,509
as... as a sexual partner, uh...
456
00:20:07,539 --> 00:20:10,145
as... as a fellow human being,
you know?
457
00:20:10,175 --> 00:20:12,978
But I think we should just find
a new and better way to...
458
00:20:13,008 --> 00:20:14,716
to do relationships.
459
00:20:14,746 --> 00:20:17,482
- You know?
- Yeah.
460
00:20:18,550 --> 00:20:20,222
- Right?
- Okay.
461
00:20:20,252 --> 00:20:23,807
Oh. Shit. Babe, I got to...
I got to go, actually,
462
00:20:23,837 --> 00:20:27,392
'cause I have a... I just...
I just got a crazy week.
463
00:20:27,422 --> 00:20:28,697
Oh, can I also, uh...
464
00:20:28,727 --> 00:20:33,498
Babe, can I... can I leave that,
uh, my laundry here and, uh...
465
00:20:33,565 --> 00:20:35,367
get it on Thursday?
466
00:20:35,434 --> 00:20:39,438
You want me to do your laundry
while you date other women?
467
00:20:39,468 --> 00:20:42,074
That's... I mean, that would
be really insensitive
468
00:20:42,104 --> 00:20:44,076
if we were
in some old-fashioned,
469
00:20:44,106 --> 00:20:45,347
you know, closed-minded...
470
00:20:45,377 --> 00:20:47,581
relationship,
but since we're not, you know,
471
00:20:47,611 --> 00:20:49,815
we're... we're, uh,
we're not confining ourselves
472
00:20:49,845 --> 00:20:51,750
to societal norms,
then I think...
473
00:20:51,780 --> 00:20:54,086
I think it's fine. Yeah.
474
00:20:54,116 --> 00:20:55,754
All right.
475
00:20:55,821 --> 00:20:57,021
Bye.
476
00:21:04,463 --> 00:21:07,599
Hey. Um, me again. Listen,
477
00:21:07,629 --> 00:21:08,403
I was just gonna say
478
00:21:08,433 --> 00:21:12,137
why don't you just ignore
those previous voicemails, okay?
479
00:21:12,167 --> 00:21:12,908
Because...
480
00:21:12,938 --> 00:21:15,841
here's... here's the real truth,
okay?
481
00:21:15,871 --> 00:21:17,509
Let's get honest.
482
00:21:17,609 --> 00:21:19,281
I am great.
483
00:21:19,311 --> 00:21:20,882
I'm great. I'm so great.
484
00:21:20,912 --> 00:21:25,617
And I'm super-happy for you
and Chandra.
485
00:21:25,647 --> 00:21:26,855
And here's the thing,
486
00:21:26,885 --> 00:21:29,157
I'm so happy!
I'm so happy and I'm great.
487
00:21:29,187 --> 00:21:32,224
Like, if great were people,
I'd be, like, fucking...
488
00:21:32,254 --> 00:21:33,729
Where is there a lot of people?
India?
489
00:21:33,759 --> 00:21:39,164
Beijing? I'm fucking Beijing.
That's how great I am.
490
00:21:39,564 --> 00:21:41,833
So I saved one of your messages
that you left me,
491
00:21:41,863 --> 00:21:43,038
you know,
right when you were, like,
492
00:21:43,068 --> 00:21:45,205
"Hey, by the way,
I'm fucking a 19-year-old. "
493
00:21:45,235 --> 00:21:47,890
It's such a great message.
It's so amazing.
494
00:21:47,920 --> 00:21:50,575
I'm so glad you told me things
on a voicemail.
495
00:21:50,605 --> 00:21:51,546
You are so brave.
496
00:21:51,576 --> 00:21:53,879
And by "brave," I mean, like,
497
00:21:53,909 --> 00:21:54,883
you're a fucking idiot.
498
00:21:54,913 --> 00:21:55,851
I just wanted you to know that.
499
00:21:55,881 --> 00:21:57,883
I saved it,
and I play it for my friends.
500
00:21:57,913 --> 00:21:59,354
And we laugh and laugh.
501
00:21:59,384 --> 00:22:02,120
And then I tell them
about your weird dick.
502
00:22:02,254 --> 00:22:03,924
And I'm fucking naked.
503
00:22:03,954 --> 00:22:05,594
And I have on...
504
00:22:05,624 --> 00:22:08,226
I have on those...
high-heel, like,
505
00:22:08,256 --> 00:22:10,295
fuck-me pumps that you love.
506
00:22:10,325 --> 00:22:11,946
Oh, yeah, I'm naked.
507
00:22:11,976 --> 00:22:13,568
Mm. You know what else?
508
00:22:13,598 --> 00:22:16,735
Remember that time you told me
to squeeze your dick really hard
509
00:22:16,765 --> 00:22:18,140
at the base of it?
510
00:22:18,170 --> 00:22:20,275
I'm fucking doing that...
511
00:22:20,305 --> 00:22:23,475
and you don't...
Yeah, and it's awesome.
512
00:22:25,010 --> 00:22:27,479
So, baby, call me.
513
00:22:30,916 --> 00:22:34,323
'Cause I could suck your cock.
514
00:22:34,353 --> 00:22:36,525
I really think
you should come over,
515
00:22:36,555 --> 00:22:38,827
'cause I might do
something bad to myself.
516
00:22:38,857 --> 00:22:42,427
Oh, my God, I might do
something so bad, and then...
517
00:22:42,457 --> 00:22:43,565
I mean, I don't know
what I would do,
518
00:22:43,595 --> 00:22:46,031
but it would be bad,
and then you would feel guilty,
519
00:22:46,061 --> 00:22:48,333
like, for the rest of your life.
520
00:22:48,363 --> 00:22:49,504
So...
521
00:22:49,534 --> 00:22:53,572
I can't wait to hear from you.
Okay.
522
00:22:53,739 --> 00:22:55,340
Bye!
523
00:23:03,749 --> 00:23:05,283
Wow.
524
00:23:05,350 --> 00:23:07,285
This is amazing.
525
00:23:17,996 --> 00:23:21,133
- Is this all your art?
- Oh, yeah.
526
00:23:21,566 --> 00:23:22,771
See...
527
00:23:22,801 --> 00:23:26,304
our society is sick, yeah?
528
00:23:26,371 --> 00:23:29,378
It's no wonder
the Earth is dying,
529
00:23:29,408 --> 00:23:33,178
'cause the culture sends
its message, yeah?
530
00:23:33,208 --> 00:23:35,050
Join the rat race. Make money.
531
00:23:35,080 --> 00:23:37,701
Be a winner,
otherwise you're nothing.
532
00:23:37,731 --> 00:23:40,352
It's read Us Weekly.
Drink the Kool-Aid.
533
00:23:40,382 --> 00:23:41,690
Fuck that shit.
534
00:23:41,720 --> 00:23:45,557
I'm my own man. I mean,
sure, got to make money.
535
00:23:45,624 --> 00:23:47,729
But I don't let them own me
536
00:23:47,759 --> 00:23:50,295
by seeking their approval, yeah?
537
00:23:51,062 --> 00:23:53,465
I'm free.
538
00:23:53,865 --> 00:23:56,067
Why I chose the name Freedom.
539
00:23:56,168 --> 00:23:57,869
Okay.
540
00:24:03,508 --> 00:24:06,278
I don't go to exercise classes,
you know?
541
00:24:06,912 --> 00:24:08,547
I do my own thing.
542
00:24:09,981 --> 00:24:11,868
Why follow the man?
543
00:24:11,898 --> 00:24:13,755
I create my own moves
544
00:24:13,785 --> 00:24:17,392
I don't need someone
to give them to me.
545
00:24:17,422 --> 00:24:20,459
Well, yoga exercises
are thousands of years old
546
00:24:20,489 --> 00:24:22,594
for a reason. They really work.
547
00:24:28,567 --> 00:24:31,603
Why don't you let the man
out of you?
548
00:24:33,538 --> 00:24:35,841
Why don't you go your own way...
549
00:24:36,508 --> 00:24:39,344
instead of trying
to please people?
550
00:24:56,761 --> 00:24:59,331
Are you gonna keep doing
those moves?
551
00:24:59,998 --> 00:25:01,500
Oh, yeah.
552
00:25:15,213 --> 00:25:17,549
Eva?
553
00:25:20,719 --> 00:25:22,057
Shit.
554
00:25:22,087 --> 00:25:23,755
Are you in there?
555
00:25:28,159 --> 00:25:29,661
Hi.
556
00:25:30,466 --> 00:25:31,666
Fuck-me pumps, huh?
557
00:25:31,696 --> 00:25:34,165
Uh, they're upstairs.
You want me to get them?
558
00:25:34,195 --> 00:25:35,570
No. That's okay.
559
00:25:35,600 --> 00:25:37,369
I took them off
'cause they hurt my feet.
560
00:25:37,399 --> 00:25:39,905
- Mm-hmm.
- You put on the sweats.
561
00:25:40,539 --> 00:25:42,874
I was worried, obviously.
562
00:25:42,904 --> 00:25:44,079
So many messages.
563
00:25:44,109 --> 00:25:45,013
You were worried about me?
564
00:25:45,043 --> 00:25:48,483
Well... 14 messages
and some suicide threats.
565
00:25:48,513 --> 00:25:52,751
I never said suicide. I said,
"Maybe something bad. "
566
00:25:53,418 --> 00:25:57,255
And that you would die alone.
You're not gonna die alone.
567
00:25:57,622 --> 00:25:58,994
But if you do...
568
00:25:59,024 --> 00:26:01,526
it's because of doing things
like this.
569
00:26:02,294 --> 00:26:04,047
You look really nice.
570
00:26:04,077 --> 00:26:05,800
Thank you. I'm gonna go.
571
00:26:05,830 --> 00:26:08,099
It's Chandra's birthday.
We're doing a thing.
572
00:26:08,129 --> 00:26:10,305
It's her birthday?
573
00:26:10,335 --> 00:26:12,672
Oh, wait,
I have a question for you.
574
00:26:12,702 --> 00:26:15,224
- Mm-hmm.
- Like, where was Chandra...
575
00:26:15,254 --> 00:26:17,776
when I was putting you
through art school?
576
00:26:17,806 --> 00:26:19,010
Oh, my God! That's right!
577
00:26:19,040 --> 00:26:20,215
Here comes the flood.
578
00:26:20,245 --> 00:26:21,249
- Oh, my God!
- Here it is.
579
00:26:21,279 --> 00:26:23,449
- She was in kindergarten. Yay!
- We are doing this.
580
00:26:23,479 --> 00:26:25,650
Well, guess what, Eva,
I could never keep up with you,
581
00:26:25,680 --> 00:26:27,519
'cause all you ever cared about
was money.
582
00:26:27,549 --> 00:26:28,990
You're a fucking liar,
583
00:26:29,020 --> 00:26:30,659
because I don't care
about money.
584
00:26:30,689 --> 00:26:33,592
I put you through art school.
You're just like... What?
585
00:26:33,622 --> 00:26:35,493
What do you even do
for a living?
586
00:26:35,523 --> 00:26:36,431
You drive a douchebag car.
587
00:26:36,461 --> 00:26:38,730
I wanted a much douchier car
than that.
588
00:26:38,760 --> 00:26:40,101
That was the one
we could afford.
589
00:26:40,131 --> 00:26:42,133
I'm sorry.
I shouldn't have said that.
590
00:26:42,163 --> 00:26:44,035
I don't like you right now.
591
00:26:44,065 --> 00:26:45,440
I love you...
592
00:26:45,470 --> 00:26:48,106
somewhat. But right now...
593
00:26:48,373 --> 00:26:50,308
I don't think
you would like you, either,
594
00:26:50,338 --> 00:26:52,277
'cause you're being horrible...
595
00:26:52,344 --> 00:26:53,878
and you look...
596
00:26:53,908 --> 00:26:54,849
horrible.
597
00:26:54,879 --> 00:26:58,416
I just wanted to have a baby!
598
00:26:58,650 --> 00:27:00,251
Okay. Come here.
599
00:27:01,086 --> 00:27:03,224
Come here. Come here.
600
00:27:03,254 --> 00:27:04,359
- Hi. Hi.
- Don't, don't, don't.
601
00:27:04,389 --> 00:27:06,858
No, don't make it a thing.
Don't make it a thing.
602
00:27:06,888 --> 00:27:09,260
Oh, my God,
you smell so weird.
603
00:27:09,327 --> 00:27:10,832
- You smell so good.
- No, just don't.
604
00:27:10,862 --> 00:27:14,332
Don't humiliate yourself
anymore than you have, okay?
605
00:27:14,362 --> 00:27:15,170
You smell like...
606
00:27:15,200 --> 00:27:17,836
- I don't know, like, lavender...
- Okay. Just stop. Just stop.
607
00:27:17,866 --> 00:27:19,107
Don't embarrass yourself...
608
00:27:19,137 --> 00:27:21,806
- anymore.
- You don't embarrass yourself,
609
00:27:21,836 --> 00:27:23,478
buddy. You settle down.
610
00:27:23,508 --> 00:27:25,844
- What's happening down there?
- Don't. Don't.
611
00:27:25,874 --> 00:27:27,979
- We're not.
- Okay.
612
00:27:29,147 --> 00:27:31,853
Brew up some coffee.
Don't. Please.
613
00:27:31,883 --> 00:27:35,120
I care very deeply
about you without loving you.
614
00:27:35,150 --> 00:27:38,089
Throw up, go to sleep,
take a shower.
615
00:27:38,119 --> 00:27:39,791
I already threw up.
616
00:27:41,526 --> 00:27:43,632
I love you so much.
617
00:27:43,662 --> 00:27:46,131
Bye. Thank you for coming!
618
00:27:53,405 --> 00:27:56,511
The only reason a man
and a woman
619
00:27:56,541 --> 00:27:59,310
should have carnal knowledge
of each other...
620
00:27:59,340 --> 00:28:00,979
is to create a child.
621
00:28:02,514 --> 00:28:05,251
Any other physical union
622
00:28:05,281 --> 00:28:08,019
between a man and a woman...
623
00:28:08,086 --> 00:28:09,954
is a sin.
624
00:28:13,091 --> 00:28:15,461
And sins are punishable
625
00:28:15,491 --> 00:28:17,862
by hellfire and damnation.
626
00:28:17,892 --> 00:28:18,700
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
627
00:28:18,730 --> 00:28:22,200
- You will go to hell!
- I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
628
00:28:22,230 --> 00:28:24,836
I'm sorry.
629
00:28:25,737 --> 00:28:27,272
You all right?
630
00:28:28,673 --> 00:28:31,910
- Did I just say that out loud?
- Yeah.
631
00:28:33,282 --> 00:28:34,482
It felt so good.
632
00:28:34,512 --> 00:28:37,348
It felt like
I was doing something wrong.
633
00:28:37,415 --> 00:28:38,887
I'm fucked up.
634
00:28:38,917 --> 00:28:40,952
I don't think you're fucked up.
635
00:28:40,982 --> 00:28:43,455
- You don't?
- No.
636
00:28:44,022 --> 00:28:46,091
I think you're divine.
637
00:28:47,325 --> 00:28:49,260
Divinity itself...
638
00:28:49,394 --> 00:28:51,329
in a physical form.
639
00:28:51,730 --> 00:28:54,032
- Really?
- Yeah.
640
00:29:09,447 --> 00:29:12,350
I thought I knew what sex
and orgasms were before,
641
00:29:12,380 --> 00:29:13,088
but I did not.
642
00:29:13,118 --> 00:29:15,188
I feel like I understand
the meaning of life now,
643
00:29:15,218 --> 00:29:18,207
and the meaning of life
is to have as much sex
644
00:29:18,237 --> 00:29:21,226
as possible with this guy
over and over again.
645
00:29:21,256 --> 00:29:23,031
Oh! Great sex!
646
00:29:23,061 --> 00:29:24,566
Oh,
it makes you do stupid things.
647
00:29:24,596 --> 00:29:26,798
I feel like I tried
to please the guy so much before
648
00:29:26,828 --> 00:29:29,801
that I never, like,
really got off.
649
00:29:30,301 --> 00:29:31,840
Darren would just...
650
00:29:31,870 --> 00:29:34,939
jam it in there
without a lot of warm-up.
651
00:29:34,969 --> 00:29:36,924
And that was
on the rare occasions
652
00:29:36,954 --> 00:29:38,910
that he could get it up.
653
00:29:38,940 --> 00:29:39,848
This is your ex?
654
00:29:39,878 --> 00:29:42,215
You know what? People say
they want to hear the truth,
655
00:29:42,245 --> 00:29:44,582
but they don't. They just want
to be, like, "Oh, poor Eva.
656
00:29:44,612 --> 00:29:47,435
Did you hear
Eva's husband cheated on her?"
657
00:29:47,465 --> 00:29:50,288
Here's the truth,
I supported him financially
658
00:29:50,318 --> 00:29:51,259
for 14 years.
659
00:29:51,289 --> 00:29:53,628
That emasculated him.
Oh, poor guy.
660
00:29:53,658 --> 00:29:56,127
So then he got
erectile dysfunction. "Oh, wah"
661
00:29:56,157 --> 00:29:58,296
So then he had to go
fuck a 21-year-old,
662
00:29:58,326 --> 00:30:01,065
so he could feel
like a man again!
663
00:30:01,800 --> 00:30:04,536
He's not worthy of you,
'cause you're great.
664
00:30:04,566 --> 00:30:06,070
Yeah.
665
00:30:06,342 --> 00:30:07,542
Thank you.
666
00:30:07,572 --> 00:30:09,073
I feel like I have
to do everything
667
00:30:09,103 --> 00:30:10,678
the guy says or he'll leave me.
668
00:30:10,708 --> 00:30:13,279
Like, I've been dating this guy
for two years,
669
00:30:13,309 --> 00:30:15,880
pretending the entire time
like I don't know
670
00:30:15,910 --> 00:30:16,684
he's dating other girls.
671
00:30:16,714 --> 00:30:18,917
You need to ask him
for what you want. Just say,
672
00:30:18,947 --> 00:30:20,054
"I only want you to see me. "
673
00:30:20,084 --> 00:30:22,387
Or date other men
and flaunt them in front of him.
674
00:30:22,417 --> 00:30:23,588
Yeah, but I only want him.
675
00:30:23,618 --> 00:30:24,759
God, why are we sitting around
676
00:30:24,789 --> 00:30:26,457
talking about how sad
our lives are?
677
00:30:26,487 --> 00:30:27,529
Why do women do that?
678
00:30:27,559 --> 00:30:29,828
You know, you're right.
We should be talking about
679
00:30:29,858 --> 00:30:30,632
how great we are,
680
00:30:30,662 --> 00:30:33,164
and if someone gives us
a compliment, we should say,
681
00:30:33,194 --> 00:30:36,434
"Thank you. It's true. "
682
00:30:36,464 --> 00:30:38,002
You start.
683
00:30:38,032 --> 00:30:38,573
What?
684
00:30:38,603 --> 00:30:40,505
- And give myself a compliment?
- Yeah.
685
00:30:40,535 --> 00:30:42,173
Yeah, just do it.
686
00:30:42,807 --> 00:30:44,746
Okay. Um...
687
00:30:44,776 --> 00:30:46,980
I think I'm more attractive
than I thought
688
00:30:47,010 --> 00:30:49,214
'cause... All right,
well, there's this guy
689
00:30:49,244 --> 00:30:50,632
at the coffee cart on the beach.
690
00:30:50,662 --> 00:30:52,020
He asks me out all the time.
691
00:30:52,050 --> 00:30:54,604
He's super-attractive,
and he's 28
692
00:30:54,634 --> 00:30:57,188
You should go for it.
693
00:30:57,218 --> 00:30:58,693
- No.
- Yeah!
694
00:30:58,723 --> 00:31:02,861
Really? Move over.
There's a new skank in town.
695
00:31:04,100 --> 00:31:05,300
I think I'm gonna tell my man
696
00:31:05,330 --> 00:31:07,665
that I'm not gonna do
his laundry.
697
00:31:07,695 --> 00:31:08,770
So there!
698
00:31:08,800 --> 00:31:11,269
'Cause I am super hot,
and he should feel lucky
699
00:31:11,299 --> 00:31:13,371
to tap that ass.
So he better behave.
700
00:31:13,401 --> 00:31:14,943
Yeah. He should do your laundry.
701
00:31:14,973 --> 00:31:17,909
Yeah, you are so hot.
Like, really hot.
702
00:31:17,939 --> 00:31:19,878
Thank you. It's true.
703
00:31:21,246 --> 00:31:22,647
Okay, your turn.
704
00:31:22,714 --> 00:31:24,152
Okay.
705
00:31:24,182 --> 00:31:25,453
I'm not a dirty slut.
706
00:31:25,483 --> 00:31:29,120
Having sex with me
is a religious experience.
707
00:31:29,150 --> 00:31:30,425
Yeah, it is.
708
00:31:30,455 --> 00:31:34,459
- I want a new candle.
- Oh, I brought the love candle.
709
00:31:36,999 --> 00:31:38,199
Honey.
710
00:31:38,229 --> 00:31:39,697
- Thank you.
- Eva.
711
00:31:39,727 --> 00:31:41,236
So sweet.
712
00:31:41,266 --> 00:31:42,503
You know,
we talk about pleasing men,
713
00:31:42,533 --> 00:31:45,370
but what about pleasing us?
You know what we should say?
714
00:31:45,400 --> 00:31:47,405
"Get down there and lick it.
715
00:31:47,435 --> 00:31:48,576
Lick it. "
716
00:31:48,606 --> 00:31:50,011
Lick it.
717
00:31:50,041 --> 00:31:53,378
Darren never licked it.
I think I'm due.
718
00:31:53,478 --> 00:31:54,881
Lick it!
719
00:31:54,911 --> 00:31:56,298
I like it.
720
00:31:56,328 --> 00:31:57,715
Lick it.
721
00:32:04,789 --> 00:32:06,576
♪ Sha-ba-lum ah-ooh ♪
722
00:32:06,606 --> 00:32:09,086
I want to see Freedom again.
723
00:32:09,116 --> 00:32:11,596
I want love and hot sex.
724
00:32:12,230 --> 00:32:18,230
♪ Sha-ba-lum ah-ooh ♪
725
00:32:22,807 --> 00:32:24,709
♪ Sha-ba-lum ah-ooh ♪
726
00:32:48,499 --> 00:32:50,319
I hope you don't think
I'm easy.
727
00:32:50,349 --> 00:32:52,140
Why would I think you're easy?
728
00:32:52,170 --> 00:32:54,706
'Cause we had sex
on the first date.
729
00:32:55,306 --> 00:32:56,941
I think it's weird
not to have sex
730
00:32:56,971 --> 00:32:58,609
on the first date.
731
00:32:58,681 --> 00:32:59,881
Really?
732
00:32:59,911 --> 00:33:03,414
Hey, do you want to go back
to my place and get stoned?
733
00:33:03,444 --> 00:33:04,252
- Uh-huh.
- Yeah?
734
00:33:04,282 --> 00:33:09,620
♪ Sha-ba-lum ah-ooh ♪
735
00:33:10,955 --> 00:33:12,523
One second.
736
00:33:22,066 --> 00:33:25,103
- Want a hit?
- I don't really smoke.
737
00:33:25,133 --> 00:33:27,705
- Oh, come on. Just one.
- Okay.
738
00:33:32,176 --> 00:33:34,712
Yeah.
739
00:33:35,549 --> 00:33:36,749
You all right?
740
00:33:36,779 --> 00:33:37,919
Yeah.
741
00:33:37,949 --> 00:33:40,385
- You okay?
- Mm-hm. Mm-hm.
742
00:33:43,488 --> 00:33:44,959
When we were together...
743
00:33:44,989 --> 00:33:47,859
could you feel that energy
going back...
744
00:33:47,889 --> 00:33:50,144
and forth between our souls?
745
00:33:50,174 --> 00:33:52,400
- It felt amazing.
- Yeah. Yeah.
746
00:33:52,430 --> 00:33:55,233
I don't think we even need
to talk, yeah?
747
00:33:55,263 --> 00:33:56,270
Can't you just...
748
00:33:56,300 --> 00:33:59,370
- feel what I'm thinking?
- Uh...
749
00:34:01,906 --> 00:34:03,574
I don't think so.
750
00:34:03,641 --> 00:34:05,643
I bet you can, yeah?
751
00:34:09,614 --> 00:34:11,416
Can you feel it now?
752
00:34:12,417 --> 00:34:16,020
- Couldn't you just tell me?
- No, no, no.
753
00:34:22,493 --> 00:34:24,095
What about now?
754
00:34:28,404 --> 00:34:29,604
Now?
755
00:34:29,634 --> 00:34:32,570
I'm the most wonderful person
you've ever met?
756
00:35:00,131 --> 00:35:06,131
♪ All I could ever need
Is you and I ♪
757
00:35:18,015 --> 00:35:21,986
♪ And all I could ever want ♪
758
00:35:22,016 --> 00:35:25,372
♪ All I could ever see ♪
759
00:35:25,402 --> 00:35:28,729
♪ All I could ever want ♪
760
00:35:28,759 --> 00:35:34,759
♪ All I could ever need
Is you... ♪
761
00:35:38,870 --> 00:35:42,206
♪ Oh I choose ♪
762
00:35:46,644 --> 00:35:50,218
♪ And all I could ever want ♪
763
00:35:50,248 --> 00:35:56,248
♪ All I could ever need
Is you... ♪
764
00:35:57,121 --> 00:35:59,991
You have never done
anything wrong.
765
00:36:00,091 --> 00:36:03,628
Sex is sacred and beautiful.
766
00:36:04,595 --> 00:36:10,204
♪ All I could ever need
Is you... ♪
767
00:36:10,234 --> 00:36:14,039
What if all the sluts
had mind-blowing orgasms?
768
00:36:14,069 --> 00:36:17,875
Only when they're empowered
by their orgasms
769
00:36:17,905 --> 00:36:20,278
can they defeat the evil mutant.
770
00:36:21,312 --> 00:36:24,882
Empowered sluts. I like that.
That's... that's provocative.
771
00:36:24,912 --> 00:36:27,985
You think we can get that past
the ratings board?
772
00:36:28,686 --> 00:36:30,358
Hey, guys, uh,
773
00:36:30,388 --> 00:36:32,423
sorry, I just downloaded
this new app.
774
00:36:32,453 --> 00:36:34,629
It detects shitty movie ideas,
775
00:36:34,659 --> 00:36:37,495
and it literally led me
right here.
776
00:36:37,666 --> 00:36:38,866
Anyway...
777
00:36:38,896 --> 00:36:41,265
let me know if you have
any real movie ideas
778
00:36:41,295 --> 00:36:44,569
that we can turn
into actual movies.
779
00:36:44,802 --> 00:36:47,038
Okay. Bye.
780
00:36:51,509 --> 00:36:52,945
Encouraging.
781
00:36:52,975 --> 00:36:54,382
Love that guy.
782
00:36:54,412 --> 00:36:56,015
Oh, I wanted to say, um,
783
00:36:56,045 --> 00:36:57,618
I... I read your script,
784
00:36:57,648 --> 00:37:01,085
uh, about the Afghan woman
who fights for the right
785
00:37:01,115 --> 00:37:03,521
to divorce her husband.
That was strong.
786
00:37:03,551 --> 00:37:04,725
How did you get a copy of that?
787
00:37:04,755 --> 00:37:07,658
I got connects.
You know what I'm saying?
788
00:37:07,688 --> 00:37:08,863
- Whoa.
- Actually,
789
00:37:08,893 --> 00:37:11,162
Peter wanted me
to, uh, write coverage.
790
00:37:11,192 --> 00:37:13,100
Oh, I thought he read that one.
791
00:37:13,130 --> 00:37:14,635
Well, I don't know.
He's a busy guy.
792
00:37:14,665 --> 00:37:18,404
But I really love the scene
where Afshan says, um,
793
00:37:18,434 --> 00:37:22,173
"This is my woman part
to do with what I want. "
794
00:37:22,203 --> 00:37:25,409
That was pretty intense.
795
00:37:25,843 --> 00:37:28,946
- You really liked it?
- Yeah, it was powerful.
796
00:37:59,010 --> 00:38:01,279
I want love.
797
00:38:09,220 --> 00:38:10,756
And so mote it be.
798
00:38:10,786 --> 00:38:12,323
♪ Ah-ooh ♪
799
00:38:13,057 --> 00:38:14,825
♪ Ah-ooh ♪
800
00:38:15,860 --> 00:38:17,231
Oh, thank you, honey.
801
00:38:17,261 --> 00:38:20,716
Hi, um, I'll just take
a regular coffee, please. Um,
802
00:38:20,746 --> 00:38:24,201
I'm just looking for this guy.
I think he works here.
803
00:38:24,231 --> 00:38:26,641
I don't know his name,
but he's 28.
804
00:38:26,671 --> 00:38:29,740
I know, 28. I know. I know.
I know what you're thinking.
805
00:38:29,770 --> 00:38:31,275
Do you know
who I'm talking about?
806
00:38:31,305 --> 00:38:32,710
- No.
- No?
807
00:38:32,740 --> 00:38:33,648
Eva?
808
00:38:33,678 --> 00:38:35,164
- Mark!
- Hi!
809
00:38:35,194 --> 00:38:36,651
Oh, my God.
810
00:38:36,681 --> 00:38:39,116
Oh, it's been so long.
How are you?
811
00:38:39,146 --> 00:38:41,786
Good. I'm okay. Yeah.
812
00:38:41,816 --> 00:38:42,823
How's Darren?
813
00:38:42,853 --> 00:38:45,923
We got a divorce.
He didn't tell you?
814
00:38:45,953 --> 00:38:48,626
Uh, yeah, I... I heard.
815
00:38:48,993 --> 00:38:50,931
- Sorry.
- Yeah.
816
00:38:50,961 --> 00:38:53,798
Uh, Rebecca and I got divorced,
too.
817
00:38:54,098 --> 00:38:55,369
I'm so sorry.
818
00:38:55,399 --> 00:38:57,968
No, actually, it's for the best.
819
00:38:58,035 --> 00:38:59,837
Plus we have
two beautiful daughters,
820
00:38:59,867 --> 00:39:02,573
five and ten, so no regrets.
821
00:39:05,009 --> 00:39:07,096
- Don't you want to get a coffee?
- Uh,
822
00:39:07,126 --> 00:39:09,213
yeah, yeah.
That's what I'm here for.
823
00:39:09,243 --> 00:39:10,084
[CHUCKLES
824
00:39:10,114 --> 00:39:13,217
- What are you doing right now?
- Uh...
825
00:39:13,247 --> 00:39:14,422
nothing.
826
00:39:14,452 --> 00:39:17,221
You want to go for a walk,
catch up a little?
827
00:39:17,251 --> 00:39:19,457
Yeah, I'd really like that.
828
00:39:19,890 --> 00:39:21,659
I was making dresses
in my kitchen,
829
00:39:21,689 --> 00:39:24,595
and then just, boom!
You know?
830
00:39:24,625 --> 00:39:26,230
That's amazing.
831
00:39:28,232 --> 00:39:30,471
I'm sorry to hear
about your divorce. Uh...
832
00:39:30,501 --> 00:39:34,171
- I feel like such a failure.
- Oh, don't say that.
833
00:39:34,201 --> 00:39:36,140
I just wish
we would've had kids,
834
00:39:36,170 --> 00:39:37,975
you know, like you guys,
but we were
835
00:39:38,005 --> 00:39:40,427
never on the same page
with that.
836
00:39:40,457 --> 00:39:42,850
Eva, you are in no way
a failure.
837
00:39:42,880 --> 00:39:47,084
You're a huge, huge success
in every way.
838
00:39:49,787 --> 00:39:51,422
Wow.
839
00:39:53,524 --> 00:39:55,092
Stunning.
840
00:39:55,359 --> 00:39:57,962
Thank you. It's true.
841
00:39:59,196 --> 00:40:02,099
"Thank you. It's true. "
I like that.
842
00:40:03,934 --> 00:40:06,203
Did you know
I left the law firm?
843
00:40:06,233 --> 00:40:07,174
No.
844
00:40:07,204 --> 00:40:09,206
Yeah, you know,
grew the hair out,
845
00:40:09,236 --> 00:40:10,975
stopped shaving...
846
00:40:11,275 --> 00:40:12,910
opened a restaurant.
847
00:40:12,940 --> 00:40:14,315
No way!
848
00:40:14,345 --> 00:40:16,317
Yeah.
You always told me I should.
849
00:40:16,347 --> 00:40:17,915
Remember that night
I made the panna cotta
850
00:40:17,945 --> 00:40:19,787
- with the aged balsamico?
- Yes.
851
00:40:19,817 --> 00:40:22,820
I had, like, a food orgasm
over that dessert.
852
00:40:22,850 --> 00:40:24,555
Yes, you did.
853
00:40:27,391 --> 00:40:29,193
Congratulations.
854
00:40:29,493 --> 00:40:30,895
You're amazing.
855
00:40:30,925 --> 00:40:32,430
Thank you.
856
00:40:32,596 --> 00:40:34,131
It's true.
857
00:40:36,200 --> 00:40:39,203
I feel a little lost in my life.
858
00:40:39,970 --> 00:40:41,590
- You know?
- Okay.
859
00:40:41,620 --> 00:40:42,882
I don't know, like,
860
00:40:42,912 --> 00:40:44,145
why am I a success?
861
00:40:44,175 --> 00:40:46,977
I mean,
is it because I make dresses?
862
00:40:47,783 --> 00:40:48,983
Um...
863
00:40:49,013 --> 00:40:51,482
yeah, I suppose
everybody would say that,
864
00:40:51,512 --> 00:40:53,984
but, uh, personally?
865
00:40:56,253 --> 00:40:59,123
You're just good to be around.
866
00:40:59,623 --> 00:41:02,793
I'm always happy
when I'm near you.
867
00:41:03,594 --> 00:41:06,597
That is crazy-sweet.
868
00:41:07,631 --> 00:41:10,167
And you are crazy-beautiful.
869
00:41:10,568 --> 00:41:12,206
Oh, wait.
870
00:41:12,236 --> 00:41:14,705
Oh, my God! What... what?
871
00:41:18,843 --> 00:41:21,579
I've had a crush on you
for 14 years.
872
00:41:21,609 --> 00:41:24,582
Really? Why?
873
00:41:24,849 --> 00:41:26,302
Wait, wait, wait.
874
00:41:26,332 --> 00:41:27,755
What... what, uh,
875
00:41:27,785 --> 00:41:29,987
what are we do...
what are we doing? Because I...
876
00:41:30,017 --> 00:41:31,338
I haven't been with anyone
877
00:41:31,368 --> 00:41:32,660
- since my husband...
- Shh.
878
00:41:32,690 --> 00:41:36,026
Um... I would like
to keep my clothes on.
879
00:41:36,360 --> 00:41:37,898
If you just...
880
00:41:37,928 --> 00:41:39,531
Uh... God, you're...
881
00:41:39,561 --> 00:41:41,135
Um... Oh, my God! Wait!
882
00:41:41,165 --> 00:41:44,269
Wait a second! That's...
Oh, my God!
883
00:41:44,299 --> 00:41:46,654
Oh, my God!
You're so good at this!
884
00:41:46,684 --> 00:41:49,009
I've wanted to do this
since I met you.
885
00:41:49,039 --> 00:41:51,576
That's what you were thinking
the whole time...
886
00:41:51,606 --> 00:41:54,144
when we met at Walmart?
Are you kidding me?
887
00:41:54,174 --> 00:41:55,583
- Mm.
- That's kind of weird.
888
00:41:55,613 --> 00:41:58,782
Thank you for telling me,
'cause I was, like, thinking,
889
00:41:58,812 --> 00:42:00,955
"Oh, nice guy at Walmart.
890
00:42:00,985 --> 00:42:04,021
He... he buys, like,
stuff in bulk. I get it. "
891
00:42:04,051 --> 00:42:06,707
Oh. Uh... Oh, my God. Oh, God.
892
00:42:06,737 --> 00:42:09,393
Oh, God.
And I then was, like,
893
00:42:09,423 --> 00:42:10,598
"Hey, you drive a Prius.
894
00:42:10,628 --> 00:42:13,330
And that's cool.
You know, cool person. "
895
00:42:13,360 --> 00:42:14,101
Hey, what... what...
896
00:42:14,131 --> 00:42:17,434
Just slow down on
that bottom part. Oh, my God.
897
00:42:17,464 --> 00:42:18,639
Shut up.
I'm gonna stop talking now.
898
00:42:18,669 --> 00:42:23,007
I'm not gonna talk anymore.
I'm not gonna talk anymore.
899
00:42:25,242 --> 00:42:26,847
You're, like,
really good at this.
900
00:42:26,877 --> 00:42:29,014
Oh, God. Wait,
I didn't groom. I didn't groom!
901
00:42:29,044 --> 00:42:31,151
Ah! Okay, okay, no, actually,
I'm okay with that.
902
00:42:31,181 --> 00:42:34,351
I'm okay with it. Never mind.
Don't listen to me. Don't stop.
903
00:42:34,381 --> 00:42:36,720
Don't stop.
904
00:42:42,993 --> 00:42:44,728
I want love.
905
00:42:53,542 --> 00:42:54,742
Babe?
906
00:42:54,772 --> 00:42:57,444
Do you have, uh, that bag?
I'm doing that lecture
907
00:42:57,474 --> 00:43:00,277
on techno-social wormholes
downtown, and they're, uh...
908
00:43:00,307 --> 00:43:02,479
they're gonna put it
on YouTube.
909
00:43:02,509 --> 00:43:04,248
Isn't that great?
910
00:43:05,583 --> 00:43:08,118
I didn't have time
to do your laundry.
911
00:43:08,185 --> 00:43:09,653
And...
912
00:43:11,155 --> 00:43:14,658
if you want to be with me,
you can't date anybody else.
913
00:43:15,392 --> 00:43:17,045
Have you noticed that I'm great?
914
00:43:17,075 --> 00:43:18,699
'Cause you don't treat me
that way.
915
00:43:18,729 --> 00:43:21,498
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Where's all this coming from?
916
00:43:21,528 --> 00:43:22,503
It's coming from me.
917
00:43:22,533 --> 00:43:26,203
But you were fine
with everything a few days ago.
918
00:43:26,537 --> 00:43:27,975
I take care of you.
919
00:43:28,005 --> 00:43:29,510
When are you gonna take care
of me?
920
00:43:29,540 --> 00:43:32,543
Relationships are hard for me.
My parents got divorced.
921
00:43:32,573 --> 00:43:33,447
Oh, God! Stop it!
922
00:43:33,477 --> 00:43:36,698
Stop using that as an excuse
for everything!
923
00:43:36,728 --> 00:43:39,950
My family was fucked up, too!
Let it go!
924
00:43:40,150 --> 00:43:43,921
I don't really like your tone
of voice right now, honestly.
925
00:43:43,951 --> 00:43:45,826
You need to figure that out.
926
00:43:45,856 --> 00:43:49,627
Uh, well, those don't look
very clean to me.
927
00:43:50,327 --> 00:43:51,762
No.
928
00:43:52,062 --> 00:43:54,031
They're very dirty.
929
00:43:54,264 --> 00:43:56,266
- What?
- Yeah.
930
00:43:56,538 --> 00:43:57,738
Extremely dirty.
931
00:43:57,768 --> 00:43:59,504
- And smelly!
- Babe, seriously?
932
00:43:59,534 --> 00:44:01,241
You know, you're gonna...
933
00:44:01,271 --> 00:44:02,676
you're gonna
regret this tomorrow.
934
00:44:02,706 --> 00:44:05,446
And... and when you do,
you can call me, okay?
935
00:44:05,476 --> 00:44:10,147
When you are ready to treat me
like the amazing person I am,
936
00:44:10,177 --> 00:44:13,317
you call me!
I won't be calling you.
937
00:44:14,284 --> 00:44:15,756
Take that!
938
00:44:15,786 --> 00:44:18,657
I was gonna wear this.
I was gonna wear this.
939
00:44:18,687 --> 00:44:21,558
Now it's even more dirty.
It's more dirty now.
940
00:44:21,588 --> 00:44:23,193
Pussy!
941
00:44:26,530 --> 00:44:29,967
And, uh, where am I gonna
clean these?
942
00:44:30,567 --> 00:44:32,269
Do you have a place?
943
00:44:32,569 --> 00:44:36,006
Okay, you know what? Thank you.
Thank you. That's great.
944
00:44:36,036 --> 00:44:37,478
Okay, we'll... we'll talk.
945
00:44:37,508 --> 00:44:39,580
The guy shows her the beauty
of her own soul
946
00:44:39,610 --> 00:44:43,313
through sexuality,
and then she defeats the killer.
947
00:44:43,343 --> 00:44:44,585
Hmm. Well, I'm not sure
948
00:44:44,615 --> 00:44:46,253
how to fit that
into a teenage slasher film,
949
00:44:46,283 --> 00:44:49,853
but I like the challenge.
I'm gonna get cracking on it.
950
00:44:50,054 --> 00:44:52,256
Don't shoot the dinosaur.
He's on your side.
951
00:44:52,286 --> 00:44:53,060
What are you guys doing?
952
00:44:53,090 --> 00:44:54,862
We're working on a video game
based on the film.
953
00:44:54,892 --> 00:44:57,861
Yeah, it's really gonna
boost our profits on this one.
954
00:44:57,891 --> 00:45:00,734
Peter came up with it
all by himself.
955
00:45:00,764 --> 00:45:03,133
The goal of the game
is to build up your empire...
956
00:45:03,163 --> 00:45:05,035
- This is my idea.
- ... and kill as many sluts
957
00:45:05,065 --> 00:45:06,570
and douchebags
that get in your way.
958
00:45:06,600 --> 00:45:07,341
That's is my idea.
959
00:45:07,371 --> 00:45:08,509
Once you reach
the higher levels,
960
00:45:08,539 --> 00:45:09,975
- you'll meet a virgin...
- This is my idea.
961
00:45:10,005 --> 00:45:11,442
- ... with special powers.
- My idea. My idea.
962
00:45:11,472 --> 00:45:13,013
Every time you see a slut,
963
00:45:13,043 --> 00:45:14,445
- you can kill her...
- That's my idea.
964
00:45:14,475 --> 00:45:15,549
- ... and get the points.
- My idea.
965
00:45:15,579 --> 00:45:18,082
Sometimes I like to shoot her
in the boobs or crotch area.
966
00:45:18,112 --> 00:45:20,020
The last one was his idea.
967
00:45:20,050 --> 00:45:25,189
Boom! That slut went down!
968
00:45:26,323 --> 00:45:28,295
So what do you think?
969
00:45:28,325 --> 00:45:29,430
I think it's really disturbing
970
00:45:29,460 --> 00:45:31,713
and it makes me want to, like,
vomit in my mouth.
971
00:45:31,743 --> 00:45:33,997
Hey, man, I need you
to go through the video game
972
00:45:34,027 --> 00:45:35,202
and make sure
that all of the girls,
973
00:45:35,232 --> 00:45:36,967
under their shirts, you can see
their erect nipples.
974
00:45:36,997 --> 00:45:39,670
- I need you to do that for me.
- Great idea!
975
00:45:39,700 --> 00:45:40,307
So smart.
976
00:45:40,337 --> 00:45:42,339
Look, The script
that John and I are writing
977
00:45:42,369 --> 00:45:43,510
is a totally different story.
978
00:45:43,540 --> 00:45:46,094
Yeah, I know, and thank God
it's a different story,
979
00:45:46,124 --> 00:45:48,679
because your script sucked shit,
and this video game
980
00:45:48,709 --> 00:45:49,616
is going to sell like Molly
981
00:45:49,646 --> 00:45:52,015
to a girl that doesn't talk
to her parents that much, okay?
982
00:45:52,045 --> 00:45:53,683
I need you to be on
nipple supervision, all right?
983
00:45:53,713 --> 00:45:55,352
You got to go through
the video game and make sure
984
00:45:55,382 --> 00:45:57,170
that every girl's nipples
are erect, okay?
985
00:45:57,200 --> 00:45:58,897
We're gonna go
for the only demographic
986
00:45:58,927 --> 00:46:00,695
that matters,
and that's teenage boys.
987
00:46:00,725 --> 00:46:02,493
Well, that's ridiculous
because John and I
988
00:46:02,523 --> 00:46:03,831
are writing a great script.
989
00:46:03,861 --> 00:46:05,697
I'm sorry. That app is going off
that I downloaded.
990
00:46:05,727 --> 00:46:07,564
It keeps going off
when people say stupid shit.
991
00:46:07,594 --> 00:46:08,869
Uh, let me fix this.
Turn it off.
992
00:46:08,899 --> 00:46:12,703
You want to know
what men really get off on?
993
00:46:12,733 --> 00:46:13,774
No.
994
00:46:13,804 --> 00:46:14,875
The conquest, okay?
995
00:46:14,905 --> 00:46:16,910
Look, I'm a hunter.
We're hunters. We're men.
996
00:46:16,940 --> 00:46:20,410
I'm a man. I'm a hunter, okay?
I hunted you. I got you.
997
00:46:20,440 --> 00:46:21,882
I found you.
I kept you for a little bit,
998
00:46:21,912 --> 00:46:24,816
and then I got bored,
and then you left and now I'm...
999
00:46:24,846 --> 00:46:27,751
I'm attracted to you again,
you know? That's what works.
1000
00:46:27,781 --> 00:46:28,789
The plan worked, okay?
1001
00:46:28,819 --> 00:46:32,022
So let's just go have sex
in my office.
1002
00:46:32,052 --> 00:46:33,457
No.
1003
00:46:33,824 --> 00:46:35,726
Everything you have is...
1004
00:46:36,660 --> 00:46:40,030
Turn your fucking head.
What's your... What's your name?
1005
00:46:40,060 --> 00:46:40,667
Demarcus.
1006
00:46:40,697 --> 00:46:41,902
You're the whitest guy
in the world,
1007
00:46:41,932 --> 00:46:46,270
and his name's fucking Demarcus.
Hey, I'm DeShawn.
1008
00:46:46,300 --> 00:46:47,107
Anyway,
1009
00:46:47,137 --> 00:46:51,441
every... everything you have
is because of me.
1010
00:46:51,471 --> 00:46:53,447
But I want to be a writer.
1011
00:46:53,477 --> 00:46:54,681
Can you just make sure
you supervise
1012
00:46:54,711 --> 00:46:57,399
all the nipples, please?
That's what I need from you.
1013
00:46:57,429 --> 00:47:00,117
That is, if you want to get
a paycheck, big boobs.
1014
00:47:04,488 --> 00:47:07,457
"I want to be a writer. "
1015
00:47:08,325 --> 00:47:10,812
Mark was down there
for so long.
1016
00:47:10,842 --> 00:47:13,472
I wonder
what he was thinking about.
1017
00:47:13,502 --> 00:47:16,103
He was thinking: Yum, yum!
1018
00:47:16,133 --> 00:47:18,001
I feel like guys
who won't go down on you
1019
00:47:18,031 --> 00:47:18,872
aren't hetero enough.
1020
00:47:18,902 --> 00:47:20,838
I mean, what would
they rather be doing,
1021
00:47:20,868 --> 00:47:22,472
sucking a cock?
1022
00:47:22,502 --> 00:47:23,343
This guy sounds amazing.
1023
00:47:23,373 --> 00:47:24,908
You can totally tell
the difference between a guy
1024
00:47:24,938 --> 00:47:26,580
who's into it
and a guy who's not.
1025
00:47:26,610 --> 00:47:29,381
I didn't even know
that I liked it that much,
1026
00:47:29,411 --> 00:47:32,182
but I haven't had sex
with a lot of people.
1027
00:47:32,212 --> 00:47:33,320
It's good if a guy's good at it.
1028
00:47:33,350 --> 00:47:36,787
Otherwise, it's like sandpaper
rubbing against your clitoris
1029
00:47:36,817 --> 00:47:38,755
while you lay in a pool
of saliva.
1030
00:47:38,785 --> 00:47:40,027
- Ah!
- Oh!
1031
00:47:40,057 --> 00:47:41,595
Well, this guy was great at it.
1032
00:47:41,625 --> 00:47:43,727
I think he could write
an instruction manual
1033
00:47:43,757 --> 00:47:45,032
- on tonguemanship.
- Wow!
1034
00:47:45,062 --> 00:47:47,935
- Did you have sex?
- I had great sex.
1035
00:47:47,965 --> 00:47:49,903
I had the best sex of my life.
1036
00:47:49,933 --> 00:47:52,369
You guys both had great sex
and I got nothing.
1037
00:47:52,399 --> 00:47:53,273
Are you going out again?
1038
00:47:53,303 --> 00:47:54,842
I don't know.
What's the point?
1039
00:47:54,872 --> 00:47:57,092
- Getting head!
- The best sex of your life.
1040
00:47:57,122 --> 00:47:59,343
I can't. I just look better
with clothes on.
1041
00:47:59,373 --> 00:48:01,248
I don't want him
to see me naked.
1042
00:48:01,278 --> 00:48:03,165
But you let him lick
your naked vagina.
1043
00:48:03,195 --> 00:48:05,541
I know, but that was
just one tiny section
1044
00:48:05,571 --> 00:48:07,697
down there.
And... and I had clothes on.
1045
00:48:07,727 --> 00:48:09,853
Plus, I work
with models all day at work,
1046
00:48:09,883 --> 00:48:11,091
and they're
in such great shape.
1047
00:48:11,121 --> 00:48:13,624
Just... I look like crap
compared to them.
1048
00:48:13,654 --> 00:48:15,025
You are hot!
1049
00:48:15,363 --> 00:48:16,563
I don't know.
1050
00:48:16,593 --> 00:48:18,198
Maybe he's too nice.
1051
00:48:18,228 --> 00:48:20,130
I'd take nice
over mean any day.
1052
00:48:20,160 --> 00:48:22,766
Yeah, or commitment-phobic.
1053
00:48:23,400 --> 00:48:26,404
Let's make a pact
to be with good guys only.
1054
00:48:26,434 --> 00:48:29,439
Guys who treat us great,
like we deserve.
1055
00:48:29,539 --> 00:48:31,575
Yeah, good-guy pact.
1056
00:48:31,975 --> 00:48:33,513
Mark is so handsome.
1057
00:48:33,543 --> 00:48:35,415
There must be
something wrong with him.
1058
00:48:35,445 --> 00:48:37,766
Or maybe I just don't know
how to be with someone
1059
00:48:37,796 --> 00:48:40,276
who's so sexually giving,
which means I like jerks,
1060
00:48:40,306 --> 00:48:42,786
which also means I can't be
in the good-guy pact.
1061
00:48:42,816 --> 00:48:45,088
I'm gonna light a candle
for you and Mark.
1062
00:48:45,118 --> 00:48:46,927
Me, too. Okay.
1063
00:48:46,957 --> 00:48:48,492
Don't forget the pact.
1064
00:48:48,522 --> 00:48:49,296
Good guys only.
1065
00:48:49,326 --> 00:48:51,361
- Good guys only.
- Good guys only.
1066
00:48:51,391 --> 00:48:53,063
- Maybe sometimes a jerk?
- No.
1067
00:48:53,093 --> 00:48:55,048
- No.
- No? Jerk sex?
1068
00:48:55,078 --> 00:48:57,034
- No jerk sex.
- Aw.
1069
00:49:06,748 --> 00:49:07,948
Oh, hey.
1070
00:49:07,978 --> 00:49:10,932
Um, thank you
for sending me your script,
1071
00:49:10,962 --> 00:49:13,917
The Red Flow.
I... I thought it was hilarious.
1072
00:49:13,947 --> 00:49:15,435
- You read it?
- I loved it.
1073
00:49:15,465 --> 00:49:16,924
Yeah, but will it ever be made?
1074
00:49:16,954 --> 00:49:19,923
A movie about a girl
getting her period.
1075
00:49:19,961 --> 00:49:21,161
Why not?
1076
00:49:21,191 --> 00:49:23,226
You know, I really want
to write a script
1077
00:49:23,256 --> 00:49:24,364
about my new friends.
They're, like,
1078
00:49:24,394 --> 00:49:27,164
these modern-day witches.
They're really inspiring.
1079
00:49:27,194 --> 00:49:29,466
Yes, witches, girl power.
1080
00:49:29,833 --> 00:49:31,301
Do it.
1081
00:49:31,935 --> 00:49:33,555
Have you heard
about this video game
1082
00:49:33,585 --> 00:49:35,205
that Peter is doing?
It is so vile.
1083
00:49:35,235 --> 00:49:36,276
Yeah, I heard about it.
1084
00:49:36,306 --> 00:49:37,778
I wish I could destroy
the computers
1085
00:49:37,808 --> 00:49:41,645
or make my own video game
called Sluts Fight Back.
1086
00:49:41,675 --> 00:49:44,318
I love that. "Sluts Fight Back. "
1087
00:49:44,348 --> 00:49:46,585
If I was technological,
I'd just put a virus
1088
00:49:46,615 --> 00:49:48,852
in the whole system
and I would shut it down.
1089
00:49:48,882 --> 00:49:50,320
Well...
1090
00:49:51,688 --> 00:49:54,125
well, it's funny
that you say that,
1091
00:49:54,155 --> 00:49:56,593
'cause I happen to be
technological.
1092
00:50:09,272 --> 00:50:10,577
What are you doing?
1093
00:50:10,607 --> 00:50:13,413
Technological stuff.
1094
00:50:13,443 --> 00:50:15,749
We could be fired.
1095
00:50:15,779 --> 00:50:18,115
Not if no one finds out.
1096
00:50:28,492 --> 00:50:30,998
God.
1097
00:50:31,028 --> 00:50:32,132
- You're a genius.
- Yeah,
1098
00:50:32,162 --> 00:50:33,630
you know what?
I am a freaking genius.
1099
00:50:33,660 --> 00:50:35,732
That was awesome.
1100
00:50:36,033 --> 00:50:37,838
It was so awesome.
1101
00:50:37,868 --> 00:50:40,455
What are you doing now?
You wanna... you wanna
1102
00:50:40,485 --> 00:50:43,073
- grab something to eat?
- Oh, I have plans.
1103
00:50:43,140 --> 00:50:44,411
This may or may
not change your mind,
1104
00:50:44,441 --> 00:50:47,911
but aside from being a genius
and a technological wizard,
1105
00:50:47,941 --> 00:50:50,147
I am also, um...
1106
00:50:50,280 --> 00:50:51,551
a really great rapper.
1107
00:50:51,581 --> 00:50:53,450
- Really?
- Yeah, I'd love to show you
1108
00:50:53,480 --> 00:50:55,101
some of my hip-hop stuff.
1109
00:50:55,131 --> 00:50:56,753
- Okay.
- You ready for this?
1110
00:50:56,783 --> 00:50:57,791
- Yeah.
- You sure?
1111
00:50:57,821 --> 00:50:59,756
- Uh, I think so.
- Mm-hmm.
1112
00:51:00,023 --> 00:51:01,425
Um...
1113
00:51:01,525 --> 00:51:03,630
♪ You so ambitious ♪
1114
00:51:03,660 --> 00:51:06,329
♪ Your soul is sweet
And superstitious ♪
1115
00:51:06,359 --> 00:51:09,399
♪ Your eyes your lip
Your heart ♪
1116
00:51:10,000 --> 00:51:14,071
♪ They're breakin' records
And the dishes ♪
1117
00:51:14,101 --> 00:51:16,309
♪ Mm-mm mm-mm ♪
1118
00:51:16,339 --> 00:51:19,176
♪ Mm-mm-mm
Chicka-chicka ♪
1119
00:51:19,206 --> 00:51:20,847
♪ Mm-mm mm-mm ♪
1120
00:51:20,877 --> 00:51:22,846
This goes on for, like,
four minutes.
1121
00:51:22,876 --> 00:51:23,950
Wow.
1122
00:51:23,980 --> 00:51:26,119
- Don't give up your day job.
- Come on!
1123
00:51:26,149 --> 00:51:28,452
- No, it was great. I loved it.
- I just wanted to do it.
1124
00:51:28,482 --> 00:51:29,656
- That was brave.
- I had an instinct.
1125
00:51:29,686 --> 00:51:32,355
Yeah, anyway, you got
the technology smarts.
1126
00:51:32,385 --> 00:51:33,527
- Thanks, yo.
- Word to your mother.
1127
00:51:33,557 --> 00:51:35,759
Word to your mother.
Tell your mother I said word.
1128
00:51:35,789 --> 00:51:38,195
- See you Monday.
- Bye.
1129
00:51:45,268 --> 00:51:47,471
Thanks for giving me
this dress.
1130
00:51:47,501 --> 00:51:48,308
Ditto.
1131
00:51:48,338 --> 00:51:50,073
Oh, God. Okay, okay,
I don't know.
1132
00:51:50,103 --> 00:51:51,111
Maybe we shouldn't go.
1133
00:51:51,141 --> 00:51:52,746
- How do I look?
- You look hot!
1134
00:51:52,776 --> 00:51:54,281
You look so hot
I want to have sex with you.
1135
00:51:54,311 --> 00:51:57,514
Okay, no, I just... Oh!
Would you guys stop it?
1136
00:51:57,544 --> 00:51:58,718
- Stop it!
- I really wanna
1137
00:51:58,748 --> 00:52:00,283
- have sex with you.
- Oh, my God,
1138
00:52:00,313 --> 00:52:01,321
you guys are weird.
1139
00:52:01,351 --> 00:52:04,421
Okay, come on.
I can't do this alone. Come on.
1140
00:52:06,623 --> 00:52:08,061
Great show.
1141
00:52:08,091 --> 00:52:10,361
Does Darren have
a daughter?
1142
00:52:10,391 --> 00:52:12,662
No, that's his new girlfriend.
1143
00:52:15,732 --> 00:52:17,167
Oh.
1144
00:52:17,501 --> 00:52:20,040
Oh!
1145
00:52:20,070 --> 00:52:22,542
Holy shit!
1146
00:52:22,572 --> 00:52:26,376
- Is that you?
- Holy shit!
1147
00:52:26,576 --> 00:52:28,145
Is that me?
1148
00:52:28,175 --> 00:52:29,349
Oh, my God.
1149
00:52:29,379 --> 00:52:34,217
Not entirely accurate, okay?
It's not 1984 down there.
1150
00:52:34,247 --> 00:52:36,586
Oh, I prefer a full bush.
1151
00:52:36,616 --> 00:52:37,654
- Really?
- Mm-hmm.
1152
00:52:37,684 --> 00:52:40,624
- Hey. Hi.
- Hi!
1153
00:52:40,654 --> 00:52:41,528
Oh.
1154
00:52:41,558 --> 00:52:44,027
- I'm so glad you made it.
- Congratulations.
1155
00:52:44,057 --> 00:52:46,429
Thanks. Thanks.
Everybody's here.
1156
00:52:46,459 --> 00:52:47,831
- Times is here.
- Oh.
1157
00:52:47,861 --> 00:52:49,349
L.A. Weekly. Yeah.
1158
00:52:49,379 --> 00:52:50,837
- Wow, well.
- Yeah.
1159
00:52:50,867 --> 00:52:53,388
Your new art is really amazing,
1160
00:52:53,418 --> 00:52:55,939
- and interesting.
- I know. I know.
1161
00:52:56,006 --> 00:52:58,159
There's...
there's a lot happening...
1162
00:52:58,189 --> 00:53:00,552
- It's powerful stuff.
- ... with all of it.
1163
00:53:00,582 --> 00:53:02,946
I didn't get your smile
exactly right, But,
1164
00:53:02,976 --> 00:53:05,318
eh, it's still great.
1165
00:53:05,348 --> 00:53:08,051
Hey. Let's have dinner
on Saturday, huh?
1166
00:53:08,081 --> 00:53:09,152
- Really?
- Yeah.
1167
00:53:09,182 --> 00:53:10,223
- Okay.
- Great.
1168
00:53:10,253 --> 00:53:11,621
- Great.
- Cool. Text you.
1169
00:53:11,651 --> 00:53:12,726
- Okay.
- Okay.
1170
00:53:12,756 --> 00:53:14,424
Yeah, I got to go
talk to some people.
1171
00:53:14,454 --> 00:53:16,630
Oh, okay, sure. You're busy.
1172
00:53:16,660 --> 00:53:19,062
Why is he wearing
that weird hat?
1173
00:53:21,131 --> 00:53:22,331
I don't know.
1174
00:53:31,308 --> 00:53:32,979
Somebody fucked
with our system!
1175
00:53:33,009 --> 00:53:34,729
I can't get this image
off the screen!
1176
00:53:34,759 --> 00:53:36,479
I thought we were
on a closed network!
1177
00:53:36,509 --> 00:53:38,582
Someone hacked
into the program!
1178
00:53:38,612 --> 00:53:39,920
Someone with a password!
1179
00:53:39,950 --> 00:53:43,353
Uh, Peter, not to point fingers
or anything...
1180
00:53:43,383 --> 00:53:45,121
Yeah, okay, look,
I'm way ahead of you.
1181
00:53:45,151 --> 00:53:46,989
You're not a fucking detective,
all right?
1182
00:53:47,019 --> 00:53:48,858
- Did you do this?
- I can't even figure out
1183
00:53:48,888 --> 00:53:50,160
how to download
the software updates
1184
00:53:50,190 --> 00:53:51,431
- on my computer.
- That's true.
1185
00:53:51,461 --> 00:53:53,697
She can't fucking download
the software updates
1186
00:53:53,727 --> 00:53:54,367
on her computer.
1187
00:53:54,397 --> 00:53:56,002
- What's your name? Darrell?
- Demarcus.
1188
00:53:56,032 --> 00:53:58,868
- Demarcus, you're fired, dude.
- Come on, man!
1189
00:53:58,898 --> 00:54:00,840
You're fired, and I'm gonna get
a new nerd
1190
00:54:00,870 --> 00:54:02,973
to make this system
that you can't fuck with it.
1191
00:54:03,003 --> 00:54:04,941
Hey, you're the guy
who has "password"
1192
00:54:04,971 --> 00:54:05,879
as his password, man.
1193
00:54:05,909 --> 00:54:08,211
Well, why don't you fucking
broadcast it on Twitter, man?
1194
00:54:08,241 --> 00:54:10,230
You're not supposed
to tell people my password.
1195
00:54:10,260 --> 00:54:12,249
- I have to change it.
- I can do the password.
1196
00:54:12,279 --> 00:54:14,317
You don't need to do it.
I'll do it.
1197
00:54:14,347 --> 00:54:16,453
I'm gonna change it. Shit!
1198
00:54:16,483 --> 00:54:18,188
Oh, come on, man.
1199
00:54:18,218 --> 00:54:19,659
That sucks.
1200
00:54:19,689 --> 00:54:21,391
See you guys later.
1201
00:54:29,799 --> 00:54:31,401
Babe?
1202
00:54:32,035 --> 00:54:35,171
You... you haven't returned
any of my calls.
1203
00:54:35,338 --> 00:54:37,941
I've been thinking
about what you said.
1204
00:54:39,175 --> 00:54:41,077
Can you please let me in?
1205
00:54:41,344 --> 00:54:44,648
- I really need to talk to you.
- What do you want?
1206
00:54:44,678 --> 00:54:46,983
Can you...
can you please let me in?
1207
00:54:47,013 --> 00:54:48,752
Tell me what you want.
1208
00:54:49,886 --> 00:54:51,321
Please?
1209
00:54:53,823 --> 00:54:55,795
Look, I... I don't know. I...
1210
00:54:55,825 --> 00:54:58,061
This is really hard for me
to say.
1211
00:54:58,161 --> 00:54:59,896
What?
1212
00:55:00,363 --> 00:55:03,833
I really liked
how you bossed me around.
1213
00:55:04,434 --> 00:55:07,304
You know,
I didn't think I would, but...
1214
00:55:07,504 --> 00:55:08,972
it...
1215
00:55:09,105 --> 00:55:11,074
kind of turned me on.
1216
00:55:11,412 --> 00:55:12,612
Are you serious?
1217
00:55:12,642 --> 00:55:14,611
Yeah, is that really weird?
1218
00:55:15,111 --> 00:55:16,746
Yeah, kinda.
1219
00:55:17,580 --> 00:55:20,717
Can you...
boss me around some more?
1220
00:55:23,853 --> 00:55:25,221
Really?
1221
00:55:25,355 --> 00:55:26,823
Yeah.
1222
00:55:39,169 --> 00:55:40,870
Give me ten minutes.
1223
00:55:54,884 --> 00:55:57,253
I want you to do my laundry!
1224
00:55:57,283 --> 00:55:58,688
Wow.
1225
00:55:59,055 --> 00:56:00,457
Now!
1226
00:56:01,524 --> 00:56:03,393
And clean my apartment!
1227
00:56:05,128 --> 00:56:07,197
And then I want you to lick it!
1228
00:56:07,897 --> 00:56:10,166
- All right.
- Crawl!
1229
00:56:22,950 --> 00:56:24,150
Eva.
1230
00:56:24,180 --> 00:56:25,849
- Hey!
- Hi.
1231
00:56:26,149 --> 00:56:28,618
- How are you?
- I'm good.
1232
00:56:29,419 --> 00:56:30,955
Welcome to my restaurant.
1233
00:56:30,985 --> 00:56:32,492
This place is incredible.
1234
00:56:32,522 --> 00:56:35,625
Thank you. It's true.
1235
00:56:35,655 --> 00:56:36,629
Um...
1236
00:56:36,659 --> 00:56:39,596
Rebecca got sick
and couldn't find a sitter,
1237
00:56:39,626 --> 00:56:40,367
so...
1238
00:56:40,397 --> 00:56:43,500
I'd like to introduce you
to my daughters.
1239
00:56:43,530 --> 00:56:45,285
Mary, Melinda...
1240
00:56:45,315 --> 00:56:47,040
- this is Eva.
- Hi.
1241
00:56:47,070 --> 00:56:51,241
- I like your outfit.
- Thank you. I make dresses.
1242
00:56:51,408 --> 00:56:52,812
I like princess dresses.
1243
00:56:52,842 --> 00:56:54,377
I could make you
a princess dress.
1244
00:56:54,407 --> 00:56:56,079
- Would you like that?
- Yes!
1245
00:56:56,109 --> 00:56:57,083
Can I have a dress?
1246
00:56:57,113 --> 00:56:59,452
- Absolutely, sweetie.
- Yes.
1247
00:56:59,482 --> 00:57:03,386
What if you guys come back
to my house after dinner?
1248
00:57:03,416 --> 00:57:05,825
I have lots of dresses.
We could play dress-up.
1249
00:57:05,855 --> 00:57:08,425
'Cause I kind of want to hang
out with these princesses.
1250
00:57:08,455 --> 00:57:10,093
They're pretty cool.
1251
00:57:10,927 --> 00:57:12,265
Mm!
1252
00:57:12,295 --> 00:57:13,833
I'm having...
1253
00:57:13,863 --> 00:57:15,168
a food orgasm right now.
1254
00:57:15,198 --> 00:57:16,951
- Oh, yeah? Good.
- Oh, yeah. I am.
1255
00:57:16,981 --> 00:57:18,705
What's an orgasm?
1256
00:57:18,735 --> 00:57:22,605
- Oh, oops. I'm sorry.
- Um, uh, it's, uh...
1257
00:57:22,710 --> 00:57:23,910
It's happiness.
1258
00:57:23,940 --> 00:57:25,979
- Hey. Right?
- Yeah!
1259
00:57:26,009 --> 00:57:27,395
- Yeah.
- How about some music?
1260
00:57:27,425 --> 00:57:28,812
- Mm-hmm.
- You guys look beautiful!
1261
00:57:28,842 --> 00:57:30,049
Let's do a fashion show.
1262
00:57:30,079 --> 00:57:32,449
Oh, now that sounds like fun,
right, girls?
1263
00:57:32,479 --> 00:57:33,453
- Yeah.
- We're gonna have
1264
00:57:33,483 --> 00:57:35,618
a little catwalk.
What do you say?
1265
00:57:35,648 --> 00:57:38,021
Yes!
1266
00:57:40,089 --> 00:57:41,791
Ready? Here we go.
1267
00:57:42,058 --> 00:57:44,794
♪ Combination must be
All right ♪
1268
00:57:49,365 --> 00:57:52,602
♪ I feel it ♪
1269
00:57:52,769 --> 00:57:54,289
Go, big sister.
1270
00:57:54,319 --> 00:57:55,809
♪ I feel it ♪
1271
00:57:55,839 --> 00:57:57,876
Yay! Little miss.
Go do your thing!
1272
00:57:57,906 --> 00:57:59,913
Oh, my goodness.
Oh, my goodness.
1273
00:57:59,943 --> 00:58:02,180
- Daddy, you got to go!
- Yes, Daddy!
1274
00:58:02,210 --> 00:58:04,447
Oh, I don't think I need
to do that, no.
1275
00:58:04,477 --> 00:58:05,251
Oh, I think you need to.
1276
00:58:05,281 --> 00:58:09,018
What is that? It looks like
a violent shoulder move.
1277
00:58:10,487 --> 00:58:12,021
Yay!
1278
00:58:12,155 --> 00:58:15,425
- Yeah!
- Yeah!
1279
00:58:15,992 --> 00:58:17,697
Let's go. Let's do it again.
1280
00:58:17,727 --> 00:58:20,763
Meow. Freestyle.
I'm a kitty cat.
1281
00:58:20,793 --> 00:58:22,435
Oh! Meow! Meow!
1282
00:58:22,465 --> 00:58:23,770
I'm a kitty. Work, work, work!
1283
00:58:23,800 --> 00:58:27,855
- ♪ I feel it ♪
- ♪ Oh, I feel it ♪
1284
00:58:27,885 --> 00:58:31,941
- ♪ Oh, I feel it ♪
- ♪ I feel it ♪
1285
00:58:31,971 --> 00:58:36,479
♪ Oh, I feel love ♪
1286
00:58:38,181 --> 00:58:39,682
Call me...
1287
00:58:51,895 --> 00:58:54,931
- Hello?
- Hi. It's me.
1288
00:58:54,961 --> 00:58:56,135
Hi.
1289
00:58:56,165 --> 00:58:57,170
Hey, what are you doing?
1290
00:58:57,200 --> 00:58:59,836
I'm just, uh, having
a few people over, yeah?
1291
00:58:59,866 --> 00:59:01,437
Uh, you want to come by?
1292
00:59:01,467 --> 00:59:03,139
Feel the music!
1293
00:59:03,169 --> 00:59:03,810
Yeah.
1294
00:59:03,840 --> 00:59:06,576
- Yeah, all right.
- Okay, see you soon.
1295
00:59:18,488 --> 00:59:20,223
Hey!
1296
00:59:21,324 --> 00:59:24,260
- One for everybody!
- Oh!
1297
00:59:25,895 --> 00:59:27,397
You in for the next round?
Yeah?
1298
00:59:27,427 --> 00:59:29,766
You... I know you want one.
1299
00:59:32,969 --> 00:59:35,775
- Mm.
- Mm-hmm.
1300
00:59:35,805 --> 00:59:37,877
Oh, it's so good to see you.
1301
00:59:37,907 --> 00:59:39,746
I'm so glad you called.
1302
00:59:39,776 --> 00:59:41,077
- You want a bump?
- Oh, I'm sorry.
1303
00:59:41,177 --> 00:59:44,247
I don't do drugs.
I'm a lightweight.
1304
00:59:45,515 --> 00:59:48,051
- Do you want to dance, yeah?
- Sure.
1305
00:59:48,081 --> 00:59:49,752
Yeah.
1306
00:59:50,820 --> 00:59:53,756
Hey. I took too much
of this tonight. You want some?
1307
00:59:53,786 --> 00:59:56,793
- Yeah, thank you. Yeah.
- Yeah. Hey!
1308
00:59:56,823 --> 00:59:57,597
Mm. Try that?
1309
00:59:57,627 --> 00:59:59,762
- No, thanks.
- No?
1310
01:00:00,330 --> 01:00:02,799
Ugh!
1311
01:00:03,766 --> 01:00:05,768
You know, I've been thinking
about you a lot.
1312
01:00:05,798 --> 01:00:07,203
- You have?
- Yeah.
1313
01:00:07,233 --> 01:00:08,608
Why haven't you called?
1314
01:00:08,638 --> 01:00:11,074
Well, look in my eyes.
Tell me what I'm thinking.
1315
01:00:11,104 --> 01:00:13,359
Um, I don't know.
1316
01:00:13,389 --> 01:00:15,645
No, no!
1317
01:00:16,879 --> 01:00:19,315
Talk to me.
How do you feel?
1318
01:00:20,483 --> 01:00:23,086
- I like you.
- You do?
1319
01:00:23,152 --> 01:00:24,621
Yeah.
1320
01:00:24,887 --> 01:00:26,556
I love you.
1321
01:00:27,624 --> 01:00:29,128
I love you, yeah?
1322
01:00:29,158 --> 01:00:31,861
Don't you know that?
Can't you tell?
1323
01:00:31,961 --> 01:00:34,297
Sometimes I can't talk
unless I'm wasted.
1324
01:00:34,327 --> 01:00:35,768
Yeah, I get scared.
1325
01:00:35,798 --> 01:00:38,301
I'm gonna talk to you now,
yeah?
1326
01:00:38,434 --> 01:00:39,969
I love you.
1327
01:00:40,737 --> 01:00:42,842
Oh, I love you.
1328
01:00:42,872 --> 01:00:45,975
Do you see it in my eyes?
Yeah, can you feel it?
1329
01:00:46,005 --> 01:00:49,215
I love you.
1330
01:00:49,245 --> 01:00:54,150
- I love you.
- I love you. Mm. Mm.
1331
01:00:56,219 --> 01:00:59,192
I love you!
1332
01:00:59,222 --> 01:01:01,224
- I love you!
- I love...
1333
01:01:08,798 --> 01:01:10,800
Oh, whoa.
1334
01:01:10,933 --> 01:01:13,503
My heart's beating really fast.
1335
01:01:14,303 --> 01:01:16,739
- Have you got a Valium?
- No.
1336
01:01:16,769 --> 01:01:18,875
Xanax?
1337
01:01:19,876 --> 01:01:21,678
- NyQuil?
- No.
1338
01:01:22,812 --> 01:01:25,566
No, it's all right. I'll just
talk to my heart, yeah?
1339
01:01:25,596 --> 01:01:28,321
I'll make it come down, yeah.
1340
01:01:28,351 --> 01:01:30,087
Do you want me
to turn the music off?
1341
01:01:30,117 --> 01:01:32,038
No, no, no, it's fine.
No, I can...
1342
01:01:32,068 --> 01:01:33,990
I can do it. Yeah,
I can make it.
1343
01:01:34,020 --> 01:01:35,825
Make it calm down.
1344
01:01:36,893 --> 01:01:40,396
- Do you want to have sex?
- Whoa, whoa, whoa, babe, babe.
1345
01:01:40,426 --> 01:01:42,365
Sorry. That hurts, yeah?
1346
01:01:42,765 --> 01:01:45,501
Oh.
1347
01:01:45,702 --> 01:01:48,139
I've never felt
that way before...
1348
01:01:48,169 --> 01:01:50,606
the way you made me feel.
1349
01:01:50,636 --> 01:01:51,978
Sex is beautiful.
1350
01:01:52,008 --> 01:01:54,243
I didn't have to feel bad
about it.
1351
01:01:54,273 --> 01:01:55,712
Okay.
1352
01:01:55,912 --> 01:01:57,915
I felt really good
about myself.
1353
01:01:57,945 --> 01:01:59,919
No, that's great, babe, but...
1354
01:01:59,949 --> 01:02:02,819
I don't think
I can have sex right now.
1355
01:02:02,849 --> 01:02:04,821
Oh, God, I hope
I don't have to go
1356
01:02:04,851 --> 01:02:06,823
to the emergency room again.
1357
01:02:06,853 --> 01:02:08,524
Oh, my God!
1358
01:02:08,725 --> 01:02:10,411
And then I made him
lick it!
1359
01:02:10,441 --> 01:02:12,098
And he did the whole alphabet
1360
01:02:12,128 --> 01:02:14,197
for 45 minutes.
I looked at the clock.
1361
01:02:14,227 --> 01:02:15,998
- What?
- Oh, my God!
1362
01:02:16,028 --> 01:02:16,869
I know!
1363
01:02:16,899 --> 01:02:19,135
And then I made him
do my laundry.
1364
01:02:19,165 --> 01:02:20,740
Now I have the power.
1365
01:02:20,770 --> 01:02:23,673
Did you ask him
if he's seeing the other girls?
1366
01:02:23,703 --> 01:02:27,146
Oh, God! No, I forgot! Ugh!
1367
01:02:27,176 --> 01:02:29,378
Well, maybe your power
isn't very powerful,
1368
01:02:29,408 --> 01:02:30,183
because you got him off,
1369
01:02:30,213 --> 01:02:31,949
and you didn't get
what you wanted.
1370
01:02:31,979 --> 01:02:33,686
My power's very powerful.
1371
01:02:33,716 --> 01:02:35,788
Why don't you ask
for what you want?
1372
01:02:35,818 --> 01:02:39,155
I try to talk to him,
but it's, like...
1373
01:02:41,090 --> 01:02:43,659
Ah! Nothing comes out.
1374
01:02:43,689 --> 01:02:44,797
What is wrong with me?
1375
01:02:44,827 --> 01:02:48,431
I mean, I can talk to you guys,
but I cannot talk to him.
1376
01:02:48,461 --> 01:02:50,750
It's like when I'm around him,
I just...
1377
01:02:50,780 --> 01:02:53,069
He makes me so nervous
that I'm not myself.
1378
01:02:53,099 --> 01:02:54,607
I'm like a unicorn.
1379
01:02:54,637 --> 01:02:56,606
Everyone knows
you can't see a unicorn
1380
01:02:56,636 --> 01:02:58,478
unless you believe in them.
1381
01:02:58,508 --> 01:03:01,410
It's like he can't see how...
1382
01:03:01,440 --> 01:03:03,546
magic I really am.
1383
01:03:03,576 --> 01:03:04,947
Oh!
1384
01:03:05,615 --> 01:03:08,484
Everyone can see it.
It's super obvious.
1385
01:03:08,514 --> 01:03:10,286
Yeah.
1386
01:03:12,488 --> 01:03:15,591
What if I ask him
for what I want...
1387
01:03:16,926 --> 01:03:18,761
and he leaves me?
1388
01:03:19,033 --> 01:03:20,233
You should try.
1389
01:03:20,263 --> 01:03:22,934
Sometimes I don't even know
what I want.
1390
01:03:22,964 --> 01:03:25,635
I think you're being too hard
on yourself.
1391
01:03:25,902 --> 01:03:28,404
Okay,
what candle did you bring?
1392
01:03:29,739 --> 01:03:31,407
The white candle.
1393
01:03:32,608 --> 01:03:34,143
For healing.
1394
01:03:35,244 --> 01:03:36,616
We all say...
1395
01:03:36,646 --> 01:03:38,681
"I wish
to remove anything negative
1396
01:03:38,711 --> 01:03:40,086
from my life. "
1397
01:03:40,116 --> 01:03:42,952
I wish
to remove anything negative
1398
01:03:42,982 --> 01:03:44,554
from my life.
1399
01:03:44,654 --> 01:03:46,656
And so mote it be.
1400
01:03:57,366 --> 01:03:59,602
Oh, and I wish for a unicorn.
1401
01:04:01,070 --> 01:04:03,209
Are you dating other women?
1402
01:04:03,239 --> 01:04:05,675
Why are you talking
in that weird voice?
1403
01:04:05,705 --> 01:04:06,646
I'm trying to sound powerful.
1404
01:04:06,676 --> 01:04:08,778
I thought that's what
turned you on last time.
1405
01:04:08,808 --> 01:04:10,116
Yeah, it turned me on
1406
01:04:10,146 --> 01:04:11,350
that you asked
for what you wanted.
1407
01:04:11,380 --> 01:04:12,952
I just never knew
what you were thinking before
1408
01:04:12,982 --> 01:04:14,951
because you just always agreed
with everything I said.
1409
01:04:14,981 --> 01:04:17,186
Well, I don't agree
with a lot of things you say!
1410
01:04:17,216 --> 01:04:19,322
Maybe listen to me for once!
1411
01:04:19,352 --> 01:04:19,892
Okay.
1412
01:04:19,922 --> 01:04:23,210
Stop dating other women!
Are you dating other women?
1413
01:04:23,240 --> 01:04:26,529
Well, there are two other women
that I sometimes see.
1414
01:04:28,297 --> 01:04:30,233
Pick me and only me.
1415
01:04:32,001 --> 01:04:33,736
I'll think about it.
1416
01:04:34,604 --> 01:04:36,772
And then she uncovers
her true erotic nature
1417
01:04:36,802 --> 01:04:38,177
and defeats the killer
inside herself,
1418
01:04:38,207 --> 01:04:41,477
which is really
her own self-limiting beliefs.
1419
01:04:41,507 --> 01:04:43,479
Wow, that sounds like
a real blockbuster.
1420
01:04:43,509 --> 01:04:44,450
Well, actually, I... I do think
1421
01:04:44,480 --> 01:04:45,918
it has potential to be
a real blockbuster,
1422
01:04:45,948 --> 01:04:49,151
because what we've done here
is we've... we've satisfied
1423
01:04:49,181 --> 01:04:49,956
the demands of the genre
1424
01:04:49,986 --> 01:04:53,422
while also creating
something truly original.
1425
01:04:53,694 --> 01:04:54,894
Oh, sorry, man.
I almost fell asleep
1426
01:04:54,924 --> 01:04:57,126
with what you're saying,
'cause it's boring as shit.
1427
01:04:57,156 --> 01:04:58,397
Hey, do you want to have sex
in the bathroom,
1428
01:04:58,427 --> 01:05:01,163
or do you want to reject me
like my own mother did, huh?
1429
01:05:01,193 --> 01:05:02,335
Why did you break up
with me? Huh?
1430
01:05:02,365 --> 01:05:04,600
Why did you break up with me?
All I wanted to do was love you,
1431
01:05:04,630 --> 01:05:07,370
and mentor you, and help you
achieve your true potential.
1432
01:05:07,400 --> 01:05:09,105
I'm sorry.
I don't know what to say.
1433
01:05:09,135 --> 01:05:10,142
I hate
that you're not into me.
1434
01:05:10,172 --> 01:05:11,658
It makes me so much more
attracted to you.
1435
01:05:11,688 --> 01:05:13,175
And I thought you were
desperate and too old
1436
01:05:13,205 --> 01:05:14,777
to bear children
without birth defects.
1437
01:05:14,807 --> 01:05:16,482
Oh, that's so out of line.
1438
01:05:16,512 --> 01:05:17,917
I'm so relieved
that you find me attractive,
1439
01:05:17,947 --> 01:05:20,501
but when can Linda read
the script that we wrote?
1440
01:05:20,531 --> 01:05:23,078
I don't want you speaking
directly to Linda anymore,
1441
01:05:23,108 --> 01:05:25,655
okay? And here's another piece
of advice for you,
1442
01:05:25,685 --> 01:05:27,493
uh, your boobs are too big,
okay?
1443
01:05:27,523 --> 01:05:28,876
They're too big
and they're flopping around,
1444
01:05:28,906 --> 01:05:30,229
and they make you look
like a bimbo, all right?
1445
01:05:30,259 --> 01:05:33,329
You look like a dummy.
That's why your directing career
1446
01:05:33,359 --> 01:05:34,467
hasn't gotten off the ground
yet,
1447
01:05:34,497 --> 01:05:35,801
'cause you look
like a big-boobied dummy.
1448
01:05:35,831 --> 01:05:38,401
Well, that's great advice.
Should I cut my boobs off
1449
01:05:38,431 --> 01:05:39,538
- so I can seem smarter?
- No,
1450
01:05:39,568 --> 01:05:42,038
you shouldn't cut
your boobs off, okay?
1451
01:05:42,068 --> 01:05:42,942
But what you could do is,
1452
01:05:42,972 --> 01:05:45,659
you could mash them down
a little bit. You could take...
1453
01:05:45,689 --> 01:05:48,377
You know what you could do?
You could Saran Wrap them, okay?
1454
01:05:48,407 --> 01:05:50,879
I do it to my dick
when I'm on vacation in France.
1455
01:05:50,909 --> 01:05:53,382
I got a big dick
and it fucking goes right here
1456
01:05:53,412 --> 01:05:55,117
and I tape it here.
1457
01:05:57,787 --> 01:06:00,508
My bodacious ta-tas honor me
and they honor you.
1458
01:06:00,538 --> 01:06:03,229
Should I be taking notes
on some of this stuff
1459
01:06:03,259 --> 01:06:06,497
for the sexual-harassment
lawsuit we're all going to?
1460
01:06:06,527 --> 01:06:09,765
Hey, don't make me load
my emotional gun, okay, dude?
1461
01:06:09,795 --> 01:06:10,569
'Cause I'm one step away
1462
01:06:10,599 --> 01:06:13,302
from loading this emotional gun,
dude.
1463
01:06:13,636 --> 01:06:15,104
Cool.
1464
01:06:16,706 --> 01:06:18,911
That dress looks
so great on you.
1465
01:06:18,941 --> 01:06:20,313
Why are you going out
with Darren again?
1466
01:06:20,343 --> 01:06:22,144
You should be going out
with the licker. I mean,
1467
01:06:22,174 --> 01:06:24,213
there's no contest.
You either get licked
1468
01:06:24,243 --> 01:06:25,151
or you don't.
1469
01:06:25,181 --> 01:06:27,516
I was married to Darren
1470
01:06:27,546 --> 01:06:28,621
for 14 years.
1471
01:06:28,651 --> 01:06:30,022
I have to give him
another chance.
1472
01:06:30,052 --> 01:06:33,356
Yeah, you don't want him
to miss out on another chance
1473
01:06:33,386 --> 01:06:34,961
of not going down on you again.
1474
01:06:34,991 --> 01:06:37,259
Okay, I just texted Mark
and I made a date tonight,
1475
01:06:37,289 --> 01:06:39,178
-10:00 p. m., Butchers & Barbers.
- Oh, no! No!
1476
01:06:39,208 --> 01:06:41,097
Then I said, "Would you lick me
all over after?"
1477
01:06:41,127 --> 01:06:42,465
- No!
- No, I didn't say that.
1478
01:06:42,495 --> 01:06:43,833
- Give it to me.
- We must enact
1479
01:06:43,863 --> 01:06:44,603
the good-guy pact.
1480
01:06:44,633 --> 01:06:46,736
Give it to me.
1481
01:06:58,481 --> 01:06:59,719
Oh, hi, babe.
1482
01:06:59,749 --> 01:07:02,118
- Hey!
- Hey. Good to see you.
1483
01:07:02,148 --> 01:07:03,522
Yeah.
1484
01:07:03,552 --> 01:07:06,255
- Glad you're feeling better.
- Thanks.
1485
01:07:07,323 --> 01:07:10,159
- Hey, I'm Honey.
- And I'm Candy.
1486
01:07:10,189 --> 01:07:11,564
Oh.
1487
01:07:11,594 --> 01:07:12,598
All kinds of lozenges.
1488
01:07:12,628 --> 01:07:14,497
Cool. I thought
it was just gonna be us tonight.
1489
01:07:14,527 --> 01:07:16,515
Yeah. Oh, of course.
Of course.
1490
01:07:16,545 --> 01:07:18,534
Um, I can take it from here.
1491
01:07:19,439 --> 01:07:20,639
Don't fuck with her.
1492
01:07:20,669 --> 01:07:23,009
Okay. So it's time to go.
1493
01:07:23,039 --> 01:07:26,575
Um, I'll talk to you guys later.
Let's go.
1494
01:07:26,675 --> 01:07:29,211
Don't forget your date tonight
at ten.
1495
01:07:31,533 --> 01:07:32,733
You have a date?
1496
01:07:32,763 --> 01:07:34,659
- Uh-
- Tonight?
1497
01:07:34,689 --> 01:07:36,585
Yes. She has a date.
1498
01:07:38,120 --> 01:07:39,889
With who?
1499
01:07:39,955 --> 01:07:41,557
Not helping.
1500
01:07:41,657 --> 01:07:43,225
Okay, come on.
1501
01:07:44,660 --> 01:07:46,128
So...
1502
01:07:46,662 --> 01:07:48,632
I don't care,
but who are you dating?
1503
01:07:48,662 --> 01:07:50,633
- Uh, I'm not. I'm just...
- I don't care.
1504
01:07:50,663 --> 01:07:51,637
- I really don't care.
- Okay,
1505
01:07:51,667 --> 01:07:54,103
well, I might see Mark later,
because I... I just,
1506
01:07:54,133 --> 01:07:55,708
you know, ran into him
the other day.
1507
01:07:55,738 --> 01:07:58,392
- You're dating my friend Mark?
- No, I'm not dating him.
1508
01:07:58,422 --> 01:08:01,077
- I said I don't care.
- We... we hung out a little bit.
1509
01:08:01,107 --> 01:08:03,112
- I don't care.
- Okay.
1510
01:08:03,142 --> 01:08:04,713
I don't care.
1511
01:08:06,082 --> 01:08:08,818
- Did you fuck Mark?
- What?
1512
01:08:08,918 --> 01:08:11,257
No. I mean, come on.
1513
01:08:11,287 --> 01:08:13,290
- Yes, I did. Okay.
- Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
1514
01:08:13,320 --> 01:08:15,324
Okay, I fucked Mark!
It's none of your business!
1515
01:08:15,354 --> 01:08:16,495
You fucked my friend!
How could...
1516
01:08:16,525 --> 01:08:18,494
You fucked my friend!
Of course that's my business!
1517
01:08:18,524 --> 01:08:19,712
Forget it.
Forget I mentioned it.
1518
01:08:19,742 --> 01:08:20,900
How could I forget that?
We got...
1519
01:08:20,930 --> 01:08:23,232
He's my friend.
We go on vacations together.
1520
01:08:23,262 --> 01:08:24,236
We went biking in Tuscany!
1521
01:08:24,266 --> 01:08:27,103
That was a horrible trip.
Just forget it, okay?
1522
01:08:27,133 --> 01:08:28,374
I can't forget
that you fucked my friend.
1523
01:08:28,404 --> 01:08:31,407
I don't care about Mark.
I love you. I love you, honey.
1524
01:08:31,437 --> 01:08:32,842
I love you.
1525
01:08:32,872 --> 01:08:34,310
Okay?
1526
01:08:35,911 --> 01:08:37,716
Where do you want to go?
1527
01:08:37,746 --> 01:08:39,882
I don't care.
Where do you want to go?
1528
01:08:39,912 --> 01:08:40,820
We'll go to Butchers & Barbers.
1529
01:08:40,850 --> 01:08:42,918
- No, we are not! Stop it.
- Get in. Get in.
1530
01:08:42,948 --> 01:08:44,136
- Don't be a child.
- That's exactly
1531
01:08:44,166 --> 01:08:45,362
- where we're going.
- Do not be a child.
1532
01:08:45,392 --> 01:08:46,743
- I'm not being a child
- Yes, you are.
1533
01:08:46,773 --> 01:08:48,200
I'm being
an extremely angry adult!
1534
01:08:48,230 --> 01:08:49,628
- All right.
- That's a huge difference!
1535
01:08:49,658 --> 01:08:52,296
Get it out here,
'cause we're not going there!
1536
01:08:52,326 --> 01:08:54,964
- Are you gonna open my door?
- Of course I am.
1537
01:08:54,994 --> 01:08:56,068
Thank you.
1538
01:08:56,098 --> 01:08:58,804
- Oh, Mark?
- Darren.
1539
01:08:58,834 --> 01:09:01,804
- Mark!
- Darren. Darren.
1540
01:09:02,304 --> 01:09:05,040
I always knew
you wanted to fuck my wife.
1541
01:09:05,608 --> 01:09:08,544
Whoa, uh, we're there. Uh...
1542
01:09:09,778 --> 01:09:11,114
You're right.
1543
01:09:11,144 --> 01:09:12,451
Oh, God. Um...
1544
01:09:12,481 --> 01:09:14,485
Just... just deny it at least!
1545
01:09:14,515 --> 01:09:16,519
At least deny it
for appearances!
1546
01:09:16,549 --> 01:09:18,457
For crying out loud!
1547
01:09:18,487 --> 01:09:20,956
Guess what. Is this expensive?
1548
01:09:20,986 --> 01:09:22,928
Mark! Oh, my God!
1549
01:09:22,958 --> 01:09:24,760
How do you like me now? Huh?
1550
01:09:24,790 --> 01:09:25,831
- Stop it!
- Huh?
1551
01:09:25,861 --> 01:09:27,997
- Really?
- Yeah! Yeah, really!
1552
01:09:28,168 --> 01:09:29,368
- Shin kicks?
- Yeah.
1553
01:09:29,398 --> 01:09:31,634
- Stop it!
- You know I took kung fu?
1554
01:09:31,664 --> 01:09:32,438
- Okay.
- Huh?
1555
01:09:32,468 --> 01:09:34,370
He took, like, two karate...
1556
01:09:34,400 --> 01:09:36,038
Oh, my God.
1557
01:09:36,605 --> 01:09:38,575
Oh, my God, Darren! Stop it!
1558
01:09:38,605 --> 01:09:40,409
He drank a Red Bull in the car.
1559
01:09:40,439 --> 01:09:42,214
He's really sensitive
to caffeine.
1560
01:09:42,244 --> 01:09:44,183
- Time out, time out!
- You're gonna hurt yourself.
1561
01:09:44,213 --> 01:09:47,116
- I'm gonna pull up the car.
- Oh, wow. Big man, huh?
1562
01:09:47,146 --> 01:09:49,552
- Settle down.
- Big man with the restaurant
1563
01:09:49,582 --> 01:09:50,523
and the washboard face.
1564
01:09:50,553 --> 01:09:52,688
Sensei Doug
would be horrified.
1565
01:09:52,718 --> 01:09:54,160
Guess what.
1566
01:09:54,190 --> 01:09:55,027
Ask her who she wants.
1567
01:09:55,057 --> 01:09:56,926
- Oh, I'm not doing that.
- No, ask her who she wants.
1568
01:09:56,956 --> 01:09:59,995
- Who do you want?
- I am not gonna answer that.
1569
01:10:00,025 --> 01:10:02,498
You have to
1570
01:10:02,598 --> 01:10:04,200
choose. This...
1571
01:10:04,533 --> 01:10:06,068
or "Thor. "
1572
01:10:18,914 --> 01:10:20,816
- Hey.
- Hey.
1573
01:10:20,950 --> 01:10:24,253
You came.
I'm glad you called me back.
1574
01:10:25,487 --> 01:10:26,825
I missed you.
1575
01:10:26,855 --> 01:10:30,093
- You look really beautiful.
- Thank you.
1576
01:10:30,123 --> 01:10:33,362
Have you thought
more about monogamy?
1577
01:10:33,429 --> 01:10:37,266
Ah, you really love that word.
Can we talk about that later?
1578
01:10:37,296 --> 01:10:39,918
I mean, this is
a really important party.
1579
01:10:39,948 --> 01:10:42,571
I want to talk about it now.
1580
01:10:42,601 --> 01:10:44,173
That's...
1581
01:10:44,203 --> 01:10:45,377
Oh.
1582
01:10:45,407 --> 01:10:46,412
That's Steve Evans.
1583
01:10:46,442 --> 01:10:49,745
That's the guy that picks
all the, uh, the TED speakers.
1584
01:10:49,775 --> 01:10:51,763
I got to talk to him.
1585
01:10:51,793 --> 01:10:53,782
- Now?
- Yeah, come on.
1586
01:10:59,955 --> 01:11:04,193
Steve. Hey, how are you, man?
1587
01:11:04,223 --> 01:11:04,930
Daniel Peters,
1588
01:11:04,960 --> 01:11:07,563
- from the... from the emails.
- From the emails.
1589
01:11:07,593 --> 01:11:08,434
- Yeah!
- Yeah!
1590
01:11:08,464 --> 01:11:09,935
- Isn't that great?
- Yeah.
1591
01:11:09,965 --> 01:11:13,402
We got to get together, man.
You know, we've been, uh...
1592
01:11:15,104 --> 01:11:16,505
Oh, this is Candy.
1593
01:11:16,535 --> 01:11:17,376
Hi.
1594
01:11:17,406 --> 01:11:19,608
- Hey.
- Is this your girlfriend?
1595
01:11:19,638 --> 01:11:20,626
- No!
- Yeah.
1596
01:11:20,656 --> 01:11:21,614
I'm a free agent.
1597
01:11:21,644 --> 01:11:23,812
I'm interested in making lots
of sexual connections,
1598
01:11:23,842 --> 01:11:26,515
because I can't be tied down
by monogamy.
1599
01:11:26,545 --> 01:11:28,751
Really?
1600
01:11:29,351 --> 01:11:30,953
Interesting.
1601
01:11:31,020 --> 01:11:32,258
What do you do, Candy?
1602
01:11:32,288 --> 01:11:36,625
I study the significance
of ritual,
1603
01:11:36,655 --> 01:11:38,163
and also I hate monogamy!
1604
01:11:38,193 --> 01:11:40,963
Give me
some casual sex, please!
1605
01:11:40,993 --> 01:11:42,534
Me, too!
1606
01:11:42,564 --> 01:11:43,936
Yeah, yeah,
that's great.
1607
01:11:43,966 --> 01:11:46,835
- Yeah, that's fun.
- Oh, Daniel, you have...
1608
01:11:46,902 --> 01:11:48,207
fascinating friends.
1609
01:11:48,237 --> 01:11:50,205
Well, she's...
It's more than a friend,
1610
01:11:50,235 --> 01:11:51,010
- so...
- Am I?
1611
01:11:51,040 --> 01:11:53,542
I would love to learn more,
uh, about this.
1612
01:11:53,572 --> 01:11:55,560
Can I...
Could I get your number?
1613
01:11:55,590 --> 01:11:57,220
- Sure, Steve.
- Hang on a minute.
1614
01:11:57,250 --> 01:11:58,851
- Listen...
- It's good. I got my phone.
1615
01:11:58,881 --> 01:12:00,884
- I can connect you.
- I got my phone. It's good.
1616
01:12:00,914 --> 01:12:02,918
I can probably connect
you guys on an email.
1617
01:12:02,948 --> 01:12:04,089
Just type it in yourself?
1618
01:12:04,119 --> 01:12:05,954
And is it Candy
with an I or a Y?
1619
01:12:05,984 --> 01:12:07,826
- With a Y.
- Oh, why not?
1620
01:12:07,856 --> 01:12:11,393
Oh. Why... why would it be
with an I, you know?
1621
01:12:11,423 --> 01:12:12,598
You guys
are all handsome guys.
1622
01:12:12,628 --> 01:12:14,063
You know what I'm talking about.
It's the fast-paced
1623
01:12:14,093 --> 01:12:15,764
Hollywood lifestyle.
You know how many girls
1624
01:12:15,794 --> 01:12:17,766
I've had sex with? 21.
1625
01:12:17,796 --> 01:12:18,737
And I'm only 35.
1626
01:12:18,767 --> 01:12:19,672
And I've eaten 12 pussies,
1627
01:12:19,702 --> 01:12:22,504
most of them
on the girls I've fucked. Hey!
1628
01:12:22,534 --> 01:12:23,709
Hey.
1629
01:12:23,739 --> 01:12:24,943
I got your text.
1630
01:12:24,973 --> 01:12:27,177
One second, guys.
I'll be right back.
1631
01:12:27,207 --> 01:12:29,411
Follow me. I got
to piss out of my cock.
1632
01:12:29,441 --> 01:12:30,316
Did Linda read my script?
1633
01:12:30,346 --> 01:12:33,148
Uh, yeah, she agreed
with a few things about it,
1634
01:12:33,178 --> 01:12:35,317
so, uh, I got rid of her.
1635
01:12:35,517 --> 01:12:36,989
You got rid of her?
1636
01:12:37,019 --> 01:12:38,324
Yeah. And, uh, it turns out
1637
01:12:38,354 --> 01:12:40,474
I got some new financiers
for the movie,
1638
01:12:40,504 --> 01:12:42,624
so it doesn't matter
what Linda thinks.
1639
01:12:43,092 --> 01:12:44,678
Oh, plus...
1640
01:12:44,708 --> 01:12:46,295
you're fired.
1641
01:12:47,234 --> 01:12:48,434
Well, great, 'cause I quit.
1642
01:12:48,464 --> 01:12:50,235
And I'm gonna write
my own movie about a woman
1643
01:12:50,265 --> 01:12:53,902
having a religious orgasm.
And no one stabs her in the ass.
1644
01:12:53,932 --> 01:12:56,038
First of all, you can't quit
after I fire you, so...
1645
01:12:56,068 --> 01:12:58,374
A person can be smart
and have big boobs.
1646
01:12:58,404 --> 01:13:00,042
And people are gonna
watch my movie
1647
01:13:00,072 --> 01:13:02,211
and people are gonna love it!
1648
01:13:02,878 --> 01:13:05,447
No one respects you,
big boobs.
1649
01:13:05,514 --> 01:13:06,949
Uh...
1650
01:13:07,950 --> 01:13:10,386
You know,
I used to want to be you.
1651
01:13:10,452 --> 01:13:13,155
But all the success in the world
doesn't make you happy,
1652
01:13:13,185 --> 01:13:14,556
does it?
1653
01:13:16,258 --> 01:13:18,994
I have friends
and you don't have any friends,
1654
01:13:19,024 --> 01:13:20,596
and I'm happy.
1655
01:13:21,997 --> 01:13:24,466
Yeah, I guess, you know what,
maybe I'm not so happy
1656
01:13:24,496 --> 01:13:26,034
in my life.
1657
01:13:27,436 --> 01:13:29,204
Maybe if we had sex
in this bathroom,
1658
01:13:29,234 --> 01:13:30,142
I might be happy about that,
1659
01:13:30,172 --> 01:13:32,441
so why don't you get
on your knees, baby?
1660
01:13:33,342 --> 01:13:34,877
Fuck you.
1661
01:13:44,520 --> 01:13:46,355
Oh. Oh.
1662
01:13:46,688 --> 01:13:48,123
Oh, wow.
1663
01:13:49,892 --> 01:13:51,693
I'm sorry you didn't come.
1664
01:13:53,462 --> 01:13:55,464
You know what I love about you?
1665
01:13:55,931 --> 01:13:58,133
You're so comforting, you know?
1666
01:13:58,400 --> 01:14:00,102
Here's the thing...
1667
01:14:00,669 --> 01:14:02,074
Sex dies...
1668
01:14:02,104 --> 01:14:04,006
in every relationship.
1669
01:14:05,340 --> 01:14:06,842
So maybe we should be together.
1670
01:14:06,872 --> 01:14:08,247
- What?
- I'm... I'm just...
1671
01:14:08,277 --> 01:14:10,813
I'm losing my passion
for Chandra, you know?
1672
01:14:10,843 --> 01:14:12,197
- Oh.
- You know, I just don't want
1673
01:14:12,227 --> 01:14:13,552
- anyone to get hurt.
- Oh my God,
1674
01:14:13,582 --> 01:14:16,119
Chandra broke up with you.
That's why you're here.
1675
01:14:16,149 --> 01:14:18,687
No, she's following
One Direction for a while.
1676
01:14:18,717 --> 01:14:19,925
Oh, perfect!
1677
01:14:19,955 --> 01:14:22,491
- That's so perfect!
- I know.
1678
01:14:22,521 --> 01:14:24,296
I'm a cliché. But...
1679
01:14:24,326 --> 01:14:27,396
the handsome guy runs off
with a younger, hot,
1680
01:14:27,426 --> 01:14:30,599
sexy, fit, tight little girl,
1681
01:14:30,629 --> 01:14:31,603
and then he gets bored,
1682
01:14:31,633 --> 01:14:33,802
and he wants to come
running home to mommy.
1683
01:14:33,832 --> 01:14:36,839
EVA
1684
01:14:38,044 --> 01:14:39,244
Mommy?
1685
01:14:39,274 --> 01:14:40,679
Uh,
I'm not your mommy, okay?
1686
01:14:40,709 --> 01:14:43,412
Okay, you don't understand.
Here's the thing.
1687
01:14:43,442 --> 01:14:45,180
I'm saving...
1688
01:14:45,247 --> 01:14:46,949
my sexual energy...
1689
01:14:47,320 --> 01:14:48,520
for my art.
1690
01:14:48,550 --> 01:14:49,888
Here's the thing.
Here's the thing.
1691
01:14:49,918 --> 01:14:52,372
I think maybe sex
doesn't die for everyone.
1692
01:14:52,402 --> 01:14:54,498
It just has died for you
and your weird dick.
1693
01:14:54,528 --> 01:14:56,729
- And Mark couldn't wait...
- Stop it. Stop it.
1694
01:14:56,759 --> 01:14:58,961
...to go down on me.
He fucking loved going down,
1695
01:14:58,991 --> 01:15:00,132
- and I loved it!
- Oh, stop. Ew. Ew. Ew.
1696
01:15:00,162 --> 01:15:02,631
- Oh, no, see, that says it all.
- First of all, ew.
1697
01:15:02,661 --> 01:15:04,436
- "Ew. "
- Ew. Ew.
1698
01:15:04,466 --> 01:15:05,604
You asked him
to go down on you.
1699
01:15:05,634 --> 01:15:09,071
No, I didn't ask him!
He asked me! He begged me!
1700
01:15:09,101 --> 01:15:09,942
- Oh, my God.
- Mm-hmm.
1701
01:15:09,972 --> 01:15:11,408
- What an asshole.
- That's what he said.
1702
01:15:11,438 --> 01:15:13,426
- Stop. That's not... Stop it.
- He did.
1703
01:15:13,456 --> 01:15:15,444
He said I had
a beautiful butthole. Ha-ha!
1704
01:15:16,211 --> 01:15:20,082
- You want a line?
- No, thanks. I'm fine.
1705
01:15:22,184 --> 01:15:24,653
Oh!
1706
01:15:28,657 --> 01:15:30,659
Are you a drug addict?
1707
01:15:31,493 --> 01:15:33,228
Why would you ask that?
1708
01:15:33,495 --> 01:15:35,030
No reason.
1709
01:15:36,565 --> 01:15:39,736
No. Look, that's just
a piece of art, yeah?
1710
01:15:39,766 --> 01:15:42,938
It's a piece of art
about a feeling, you know?
1711
01:15:42,968 --> 01:15:46,008
Just a feeling
some people make me feel.
1712
01:15:46,394 --> 01:15:47,594
So there's a lot
of other people
1713
01:15:47,624 --> 01:15:48,747
who think you're a drug addict?
1714
01:15:48,777 --> 01:15:52,214
No. No, I just like to party
and have a good time is all,
1715
01:15:52,244 --> 01:15:52,784
yeah?
1716
01:15:52,814 --> 01:15:55,635
Who else thinks
you're a drug addict?
1717
01:15:55,665 --> 01:15:58,487
Look,
just my stupid family.
1718
01:15:58,517 --> 01:15:59,157
Your family?
1719
01:15:59,187 --> 01:16:00,859
Yeah, look,
just 'cause they give me money,
1720
01:16:00,889 --> 01:16:04,626
it makes them think they got
the right to judge me, yeah?
1721
01:16:04,927 --> 01:16:07,099
But come on.
Let's get some food.
1722
01:16:07,129 --> 01:16:10,198
Why does your family think
you're a drug addict?
1723
01:16:11,967 --> 01:16:13,472
I'm Freedom, yeah?
1724
01:16:13,502 --> 01:16:16,271
I'm free from family shackles.
1725
01:16:17,439 --> 01:16:19,025
Stop doing drugs.
1726
01:16:19,055 --> 01:16:20,642
I'll help you.
1727
01:16:24,379 --> 01:16:25,981
I love you.
1728
01:16:28,183 --> 01:16:31,053
Yeah, I... I love you so much.
1729
01:16:31,520 --> 01:16:33,292
And I've been thinking, yeah?
I...
1730
01:16:33,322 --> 01:16:35,694
I've got to get out of this city
for a while...
1731
01:16:35,724 --> 01:16:39,361
'cause sometimes a man,
he needs to go on walkabout.
1732
01:16:39,391 --> 01:16:41,466
I've got these big mountains
to climb, yeah?
1733
01:16:41,496 --> 01:16:45,033
A man, he needs to be able
to climb his mountains, yeah?
1734
01:16:45,063 --> 01:16:46,071
Do you understand?
1735
01:16:46,101 --> 01:16:48,140
Not really. Are you talking
about real mountains, or...
1736
01:16:48,170 --> 01:16:51,473
I'm talking about the mountains
that only a real man can climb,
1737
01:16:51,503 --> 01:16:53,909
yeah? 'Cause that's... that's me.
1738
01:16:54,042 --> 01:16:55,577
I'm a man.
1739
01:16:57,012 --> 01:16:58,513
Can I come with you?
1740
01:16:58,543 --> 01:16:59,284
No.
1741
01:16:59,314 --> 01:17:02,484
No, I've got wars to fight.
Do you see?
1742
01:17:03,485 --> 01:17:05,654
Hey, maybe we'll reunite, yeah?
1743
01:17:05,721 --> 01:17:07,289
In, like, five years.
1744
01:17:07,319 --> 01:17:08,690
Five years?
1745
01:17:08,720 --> 01:17:10,192
Yeah.
1746
01:17:10,792 --> 01:17:12,628
Come on, look in my eyes.
1747
01:17:13,595 --> 01:17:15,364
What am I thinking?
1748
01:17:16,136 --> 01:17:17,336
I don't know.
1749
01:17:17,366 --> 01:17:20,268
Can two people
ever really be together?
1750
01:17:20,602 --> 01:17:23,472
And once they're together,
can they ever really be apart?
1751
01:17:23,502 --> 01:17:25,173
These feelings...
1752
01:17:25,474 --> 01:17:27,976
they'll always exist inside us.
1753
01:17:29,945 --> 01:17:32,714
Maybe I'll come back for you
one day.
1754
01:17:33,248 --> 01:17:34,950
But maybe not.
1755
01:17:35,584 --> 01:17:37,022
And remember...
1756
01:17:37,052 --> 01:17:39,621
I left you better
than I found you.
1757
01:17:44,860 --> 01:17:47,065
"I left you better
than I found you"?
1758
01:17:47,095 --> 01:17:49,431
And then he went off
to climb mountains.
1759
01:17:49,461 --> 01:17:51,169
Probably mountains of cocaine.
1760
01:17:51,199 --> 01:17:53,969
How can I have
the amazing sex again?
1761
01:17:53,999 --> 01:17:55,540
I think he was the one.
1762
01:17:55,570 --> 01:17:58,475
No, he's not the one.
You're the one.
1763
01:17:58,505 --> 01:18:01,410
You're the only one
that matters.
1764
01:18:01,510 --> 01:18:03,278
These candles are dangerous.
1765
01:18:03,308 --> 01:18:04,082
And they don't work!
1766
01:18:04,112 --> 01:18:06,682
Let's do a spell for the power
to make our dreams come true.
1767
01:18:06,712 --> 01:18:09,551
We don't have power.
We have low self-esteem.
1768
01:18:09,581 --> 01:18:10,822
Okay, don't say that.
1769
01:18:10,852 --> 01:18:13,291
- Ah! The candles!
- Stop it.
1770
01:18:13,321 --> 01:18:16,324
Only a stupid idiot
would believe in a magic candle.
1771
01:18:16,354 --> 01:18:17,095
I believe in them.
1772
01:18:17,125 --> 01:18:18,493
That's 'cause you live
in a fantasy world.
1773
01:18:18,523 --> 01:18:19,631
- What is going on?
- Look,
1774
01:18:19,661 --> 01:18:21,099
I paid a lot of money
for your candles
1775
01:18:21,129 --> 01:18:23,565
and I'm gonna sue you
for false advertising!
1776
01:18:23,595 --> 01:18:25,200
I bought them
from a candle emporium.
1777
01:18:25,230 --> 01:18:26,835
- They're not magic.
- I hate the candles!
1778
01:18:26,865 --> 01:18:27,973
- No!
- Whoa, calm down!
1779
01:18:28,003 --> 01:18:29,538
You guys all have your periods,
right? That's...
1780
01:18:29,568 --> 01:18:31,523
The candles suck!
All right, you know,
1781
01:18:31,553 --> 01:18:33,508
this is your friend.
You are fired.
1782
01:18:33,538 --> 01:18:35,377
Oh! I quit!
1783
01:18:35,544 --> 01:18:36,915
She's not my friend!
1784
01:18:36,945 --> 01:18:38,715
'Cause I'm not friends
with people
1785
01:18:38,745 --> 01:18:40,515
that think I'm stupid.
1786
01:18:41,550 --> 01:18:43,919
And we're not on our periods!
1787
01:18:45,921 --> 01:18:49,224
I mean, to be fair,
I am on my period.
1788
01:18:49,254 --> 01:18:51,727
It's towards the end
of my cycle.
1789
01:18:52,461 --> 01:18:54,796
It's only a matter of time
for the rest of them, right?
1790
01:18:54,826 --> 01:18:56,798
- Would you just stop?
- Okay.
1791
01:19:28,396 --> 01:19:30,932
You okay?
1792
01:19:31,032 --> 01:19:33,668
- Not really.
- You know what?
1793
01:19:34,236 --> 01:19:35,971
Screw this place.
1794
01:19:39,040 --> 01:19:40,475
Hey.
1795
01:19:40,909 --> 01:19:44,746
Working with you has been
the best part of my job.
1796
01:19:46,748 --> 01:19:49,169
You know,
I wanted to be the voice
1797
01:19:49,199 --> 01:19:51,620
of modern feminism,
but I'm a loser.
1798
01:19:51,650 --> 01:19:52,224
And I...
1799
01:19:52,254 --> 01:19:53,855
don't think my friends
will ever talk to me again,
1800
01:19:53,885 --> 01:19:55,573
'cause I took a big crap
on them
1801
01:19:55,603 --> 01:19:57,292
and then I crapped
in front of them.
1802
01:19:58,064 --> 01:19:59,264
I took an emotional shit.
1803
01:19:59,294 --> 01:20:03,031
Everything's gonna be okay.
I believe in you, yo.
1804
01:20:03,061 --> 01:20:05,667
And you do have
a feminist voice.
1805
01:20:05,697 --> 01:20:07,139
You're the full package.
1806
01:20:07,169 --> 01:20:09,556
I think you're a package
and a half.
1807
01:20:09,586 --> 01:20:11,943
- I'm a package and a half?
- Yeah.
1808
01:20:11,973 --> 01:20:14,780
I'd even go so far as saying
you're two packages.
1809
01:20:14,810 --> 01:20:17,312
That's the nicest thing
that anyone's ever said to me.
1810
01:20:17,342 --> 01:20:19,848
That's the nicest thing
I've ever said.
1811
01:20:21,516 --> 01:20:22,951
Huh.
1812
01:20:36,331 --> 01:20:38,718
Hello. I'm looking
for the special unicorn lady
1813
01:20:38,748 --> 01:20:41,136
who lives in this apartment
and is very magical.
1814
01:20:41,166 --> 01:20:43,275
Oh. Leave me alone.
1815
01:20:43,305 --> 01:20:45,707
I'm living in my fantasy world.
1816
01:20:46,241 --> 01:20:48,043
I'm sorry I was a jerk.
1817
01:20:48,176 --> 01:20:49,945
I really miss you.
1818
01:20:52,514 --> 01:20:53,982
Wow.
1819
01:20:54,249 --> 01:20:56,319
I can't believe you did this.
Thanks.
1820
01:20:56,349 --> 01:20:58,390
Don't thank me.
It's the candles.
1821
01:20:58,420 --> 01:21:00,225
- They really work.
- Stop making fun of me.
1822
01:21:00,255 --> 01:21:04,726
I'm not. My life was depressing
without your magic spells.
1823
01:21:04,793 --> 01:21:05,997
Thank you. It's true.
1824
01:21:06,027 --> 01:21:07,596
Listen, I have a great idea.
1825
01:21:13,535 --> 01:21:16,905
All right, the factory
in Jakarta's running behind.
1826
01:21:18,373 --> 01:21:19,709
Can we sell
the magical candles
1827
01:21:19,739 --> 01:21:21,076
in your store
and use the profits
1828
01:21:21,106 --> 01:21:21,880
to pay Candy's rent?
1829
01:21:21,910 --> 01:21:25,780
I don't know. Maybe I have
too much low self-esteem.
1830
01:21:26,014 --> 01:21:27,782
I'm sorry
that I projectile-vomited
1831
01:21:27,812 --> 01:21:28,720
my low self-esteem onto you,
1832
01:21:28,750 --> 01:21:31,519
and I promise to swallow it
back down next time.
1833
01:21:31,549 --> 01:21:32,624
Ew.
1834
01:21:32,654 --> 01:21:34,392
That is the grossest analogy.
1835
01:21:34,422 --> 01:21:39,427
- Yes, you can sell candles here.
- Thank you.
1836
01:21:39,961 --> 01:21:42,197
You guys look really cute.
1837
01:21:42,227 --> 01:21:43,602
- We're witches.
- Oh!
1838
01:21:43,632 --> 01:21:45,734
I thought you were,
like, mean cowgirls.
1839
01:21:45,764 --> 01:21:47,569
Witches. It's better.
It's better.
1840
01:21:47,599 --> 01:21:49,404
Come see.
We'll set up over here.
1841
01:21:50,839 --> 01:21:52,092
A lot of people are gonna
tell you
1842
01:21:52,122 --> 01:21:53,345
you can't do things
in your life,
1843
01:21:53,375 --> 01:21:55,277
and I'm here to tell you
that you can.
1844
01:21:55,307 --> 01:21:56,781
Believe in yourself.
1845
01:21:56,811 --> 01:22:00,248
And remember
how amazing you really are.
1846
01:22:03,518 --> 01:22:05,557
Oh! We sold so many.
1847
01:22:05,587 --> 01:22:07,525
Wow, witches are, like,
the new vampires.
1848
01:22:07,555 --> 01:22:10,926
It's shocking how many people
are buying these things.
1849
01:22:10,956 --> 01:22:13,828
The two children's dresses
we made came in.
1850
01:22:13,858 --> 01:22:15,997
What do you want
to do with them?
1851
01:22:16,027 --> 01:22:17,335
Oh.
1852
01:22:17,365 --> 01:22:18,770
What's happening with Mark?
1853
01:22:18,800 --> 01:22:21,821
We broke up.
I forgot the good-guy pact
1854
01:22:21,851 --> 01:22:24,873
and I chose Darren.
And I really regret it.
1855
01:22:24,903 --> 01:22:26,174
You gotta give
those little girls
1856
01:22:26,204 --> 01:22:28,209
- their dresses.
- I'm pretty sure
1857
01:22:28,239 --> 01:22:30,245
he never wants to see me again.
1858
01:22:31,613 --> 01:22:34,082
Fine. What do you think?
Maybe not, right?
1859
01:22:34,112 --> 01:22:35,987
Oh, my God!
1860
01:22:36,017 --> 01:22:37,971
That look. Jeez.
1861
01:22:38,001 --> 01:22:39,955
All right. Okay.
1862
01:22:46,328 --> 01:22:48,964
He didn't come,
so there you go.
1863
01:22:49,068 --> 01:22:50,268
Not home, right?
1864
01:22:50,298 --> 01:22:52,300
Oh, God.
1865
01:22:53,001 --> 01:22:55,603
Uh, hi. How are you? Um...
1866
01:22:56,538 --> 01:23:00,342
I know you probably
don't want to see me. Um...
1867
01:23:00,372 --> 01:23:03,144
I made dresses
for your daughters.
1868
01:23:04,546 --> 01:23:06,114
Nice. Thank you.
1869
01:23:07,415 --> 01:23:08,653
I'm sorry.
1870
01:23:08,683 --> 01:23:11,553
I'm so sorry I sabotaged
our relationship.
1871
01:23:11,583 --> 01:23:14,326
And I'm sorry I treated you
so badly
1872
01:23:14,356 --> 01:23:18,026
when you're just, like,
the greatest guy.
1873
01:23:18,426 --> 01:23:20,632
Thanks for saying that,
but, uh...
1874
01:23:20,662 --> 01:23:23,732
I don't think we should
see each other anymore.
1875
01:23:26,239 --> 01:23:27,439
Um...
1876
01:23:27,469 --> 01:23:30,138
for what it's worth,
I broke up with Darren...
1877
01:23:30,205 --> 01:23:31,706
for good.
1878
01:23:32,407 --> 01:23:33,611
Just...
1879
01:23:33,641 --> 01:23:36,077
I don't think
I liked myself enough
1880
01:23:36,107 --> 01:23:38,179
to choose a good guy.
1881
01:23:38,947 --> 01:23:41,049
I didn't think I deserved it.
1882
01:23:41,079 --> 01:23:41,920
Eva!
1883
01:23:41,950 --> 01:23:44,019
- Hey, sweetie!
- Hey, Eva.
1884
01:23:44,049 --> 01:23:44,923
I made you dresses.
1885
01:23:44,953 --> 01:23:48,490
Yay! Come in!
Evie, Evie, Evie!
1886
01:23:53,261 --> 01:23:54,896
Yes!
1887
01:23:55,830 --> 01:23:59,968
I like the dress.
I'm having an orgasm.
1888
01:24:06,674 --> 01:24:09,611
♪ I feel it ♪
1889
01:24:10,745 --> 01:24:14,249
♪ I feel it ♪
1890
01:24:14,516 --> 01:24:18,204
♪ I feel it ♪
1891
01:24:18,234 --> 01:24:21,923
♪ I feel love ♪
1892
01:24:22,991 --> 01:24:25,528
Who knew getting a divorce
could be so great?
1893
01:24:25,558 --> 01:24:28,066
- Yeah.
- What's going on with Daniel?
1894
01:24:28,096 --> 01:24:31,184
Nothing! That's why we need
a super-powerful spell.
1895
01:24:31,214 --> 01:24:34,302
I think we should call
on all the elements to help us.
1896
01:24:34,332 --> 01:24:35,640
- Honey, are you in?
- I'm so in.
1897
01:24:35,670 --> 01:24:37,372
In fact, I'm gonna call
on the elements.
1898
01:24:37,402 --> 01:24:38,790
What are the elements?
1899
01:24:38,820 --> 01:24:40,178
Uh, Earth.
1900
01:24:40,208 --> 01:24:42,061
Okay, Earth. Earth. Okay.
1901
01:24:42,091 --> 01:24:43,915
I am going to... I don't know,
1902
01:24:43,945 --> 01:24:47,582
I'm going to call on the Earth
and... Is that really dorky?
1903
01:24:47,612 --> 01:24:48,787
- No, no, no!
- No, it's amazing!
1904
01:24:48,817 --> 01:24:51,553
- I'm gonna walk on it. Why not?
- Okay.
1905
01:24:51,583 --> 01:24:53,391
What's up, earth?
1906
01:24:53,421 --> 01:24:55,491
Okay,
what's another element?
1907
01:24:55,521 --> 01:24:57,592
- Uh, wind.
- Okay, what about...
1908
01:24:59,694 --> 01:25:02,363
- Would incense count?
- Yeah!
1909
01:25:02,464 --> 01:25:04,999
- Sure.
- All right. Um...
1910
01:25:05,029 --> 01:25:06,468
we call on the wind.
1911
01:25:09,971 --> 01:25:12,492
- Am I imagining that?
- No.
1912
01:25:12,522 --> 01:25:15,013
- Wow, so cool!
- So cool!
1913
01:25:15,043 --> 01:25:19,214
Okay, what about water?
Here. Drink your drinks.
1914
01:25:22,984 --> 01:25:24,752
I call on water!
1915
01:25:29,924 --> 01:25:31,960
Guys, we made it rain.
1916
01:25:32,494 --> 01:25:34,496
Candles are fire.
1917
01:25:34,929 --> 01:25:36,768
Purple for power.
1918
01:25:36,798 --> 01:25:38,800
The power to get what we want.
1919
01:25:40,068 --> 01:25:41,703
Say your wishes.
1920
01:25:41,769 --> 01:25:43,508
I wish to like myself.
1921
01:25:43,538 --> 01:25:46,174
- So mote it be.
- So mote it be.
1922
01:25:46,808 --> 01:25:51,012
I wish to know that I deserve
the good things in life.
1923
01:25:51,042 --> 01:25:53,114
So mote it be.
1924
01:25:55,850 --> 01:25:57,355
I wish for love...
1925
01:25:57,385 --> 01:25:58,857
and money.
1926
01:25:58,887 --> 01:26:01,055
- So mote it be.
- So mote it be.
1927
01:26:01,289 --> 01:26:05,360
We ask the elements to help us
with our hearts' desires.
1928
01:26:06,060 --> 01:26:07,529
This...
1929
01:26:07,829 --> 01:26:09,564
or something better.
1930
01:26:09,631 --> 01:26:13,935
♪ All I could ever need
Is you ♪
1931
01:26:15,703 --> 01:26:19,641
If you believe in magic,
then there's magic!
1932
01:26:27,215 --> 01:26:29,435
It's raining so hard!
1933
01:26:29,465 --> 01:26:31,686
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
1934
01:26:31,953 --> 01:26:33,958
"To truly experience
ecstatic sex,
1935
01:26:33,988 --> 01:26:35,994
you must first fall in love
with yourself.
1936
01:26:36,024 --> 01:26:40,028
Look at yourself in a mirror
and say, 'I love you. ' "
1937
01:26:45,967 --> 01:26:47,502
I love you.
1938
01:26:49,971 --> 01:26:51,573
I love you.
1939
01:26:53,241 --> 01:26:54,642
Well...
1940
01:26:55,977 --> 01:26:58,314
"Now look at your yoni
in a mirror
1941
01:26:58,344 --> 01:27:00,682
and admire
its tremendous beauty. "
1942
01:27:06,754 --> 01:27:08,389
I love you.
1943
01:27:08,790 --> 01:27:12,760
"Discover what kind of pressure
you like. Play music. "
1944
01:27:20,535 --> 01:27:22,870
♪ I pull up to the club ♪
1945
01:27:22,900 --> 01:27:24,742
♪ I got my swag on ♪
1946
01:27:24,772 --> 01:27:26,759
♪ The music's playing loud ♪
1947
01:27:26,789 --> 01:27:28,776
♪ Can't play their money y'all ♪
1948
01:27:28,806 --> 01:27:30,911
♪ I see 'em lookin' at me ♪
1949
01:27:30,941 --> 01:27:33,297
♪ She got a pretty smile ♪
1950
01:27:33,327 --> 01:27:35,683
♪ So I'm-a get a drink ♪
1951
01:27:42,757 --> 01:27:44,058
Mm. Okay.
1952
01:27:48,062 --> 01:27:49,897
♪ Come on ♪
1953
01:27:52,967 --> 01:27:55,703
Hell! Hell! Hell!
1954
01:27:55,733 --> 01:27:57,338
And hell!
1955
01:27:57,368 --> 01:27:58,943
Shut up.
1956
01:27:58,973 --> 01:28:00,760
♪ Girl I want ya ♪
1957
01:28:00,790 --> 01:28:02,577
♪ There's no way... ♪
1958
01:28:05,280 --> 01:28:09,083
- Can you take your shirt off?
- Don't. Please. Please don't.
1959
01:28:09,113 --> 01:28:10,985
Can I just leave it on?
1960
01:28:11,052 --> 01:28:12,854
Can I... Okay.
1961
01:28:14,656 --> 01:28:16,157
Um...
1962
01:28:18,497 --> 01:28:19,697
I just...
1963
01:28:19,727 --> 01:28:22,797
I don't want you
to be disappointed.
1964
01:28:24,399 --> 01:28:27,368
Why don't you let me be
the judge of that?
1965
01:28:51,859 --> 01:28:55,830
You are the most beautiful
woman I've ever seen.
1966
01:29:06,541 --> 01:29:09,010
See ya, Jane.
1967
01:29:10,082 --> 01:29:11,282
- Hi.
- Hi.
1968
01:29:11,312 --> 01:29:13,047
Can I talk to you
for a second?
1969
01:29:13,077 --> 01:29:13,851
- Okay.
- Um,
1970
01:29:13,881 --> 01:29:15,601
I'm the old assistant
who likes sluts.
1971
01:29:15,631 --> 01:29:17,322
I know who you are.
I liked your script.
1972
01:29:17,352 --> 01:29:20,988
Thank you. So I'm not working
for Peter anymore.
1973
01:29:21,018 --> 01:29:21,826
Good. He's a dick.
1974
01:29:21,856 --> 01:29:24,892
Yeah. And I wrote a new script
and I wanted to pitch it to you
1975
01:29:24,922 --> 01:29:26,694
and I was hoping
you would read it.
1976
01:29:26,724 --> 01:29:27,699
How did you find me?
1977
01:29:27,729 --> 01:29:30,566
Well, I, uh...
I stole Peter's contacts.
1978
01:29:30,596 --> 01:29:33,434
- Oh, very sneaky. I like that.
- I'm sneaky.
1979
01:29:33,464 --> 01:29:35,169
- Mm-hmm.
- I want to be a filmmaker.
1980
01:29:35,199 --> 01:29:37,304
Really?
Have you directed before?
1981
01:29:37,334 --> 01:29:39,410
- No, just a short.
- Hmm. Well, okay.
1982
01:29:39,440 --> 01:29:42,477
You can walk me to my car.
I'll give you five minutes.
1983
01:29:42,507 --> 01:29:43,945
Okay!
1984
01:29:48,716 --> 01:29:50,551
Are you dating Steve?
1985
01:29:51,252 --> 01:29:53,221
What? No.
1986
01:29:57,125 --> 01:29:59,145
- Let's be monogamous.
- Oh!
1987
01:29:59,175 --> 01:30:01,195
Let's be monogamous right now!
1988
01:30:01,225 --> 01:30:02,964
- Yeah!
- Yeah!
1989
01:30:03,865 --> 01:30:05,900
- Oh!
- Ow.
1990
01:30:06,872 --> 01:30:08,072
Mm-hmm!
1991
01:30:08,102 --> 01:30:10,089
I am going to get
the biggest Cosmo they got.
1992
01:30:10,119 --> 01:30:12,106
- Make it a double.
- Oh, I just love your boots.
1993
01:30:12,136 --> 01:30:14,809
- They're gorgeous.
- Right? I know. Right?
1994
01:30:15,076 --> 01:30:17,181
- Excuse me.
- Yes?
1995
01:30:17,211 --> 01:30:20,548
Are you the priest
from St. Francis of Assisi?
1996
01:30:20,615 --> 01:30:22,520
Yes, I used to be.
1997
01:30:22,550 --> 01:30:25,653
I used to go to your church
when I was a kid.
1998
01:30:26,120 --> 01:30:27,525
Oh!
1999
01:30:27,555 --> 01:30:29,457
- Well.
- Yeah.
2000
01:30:29,487 --> 01:30:30,925
Hmm.
2001
01:30:31,659 --> 01:30:33,728
Didn't you used to preach
that no one should have sex
2002
01:30:33,758 --> 01:30:35,863
unless it was for the purpose
of procreation?
2003
01:30:35,893 --> 01:30:37,602
Oh, I used to say
a lot of stuff.
2004
01:30:37,632 --> 01:30:40,086
- Mm-hmm.
- Now I just do what feels good.
2005
01:30:40,116 --> 01:30:42,462
- And what feels good is Frank.
- Mm-hmm!
2006
01:30:42,492 --> 01:30:44,839
Excuse me. But...
but what about people
2007
01:30:44,869 --> 01:30:45,810
who listened to what you said
2008
01:30:45,840 --> 01:30:48,075
and then they spent
their lives feeling tormented?
2009
01:30:48,105 --> 01:30:49,777
And what about hell?
2010
01:30:50,745 --> 01:30:52,246
Sorry?
2011
01:30:56,617 --> 01:30:57,989
Don't torment yourself.
2012
01:30:58,019 --> 01:31:00,988
I think God wants us
to be happy.
2013
01:31:04,325 --> 01:31:07,662
- So uncomfortable.
- Right? I know.
2014
01:31:09,597 --> 01:31:12,567
I know you're gonna talk
at TED one day.
2015
01:31:12,597 --> 01:31:14,435
You are so great.
2016
01:31:14,465 --> 01:31:15,740
I love you.
2017
01:31:15,770 --> 01:31:18,606
I love you. Thank you.
2018
01:31:20,908 --> 01:31:23,511
You know, Honey got me
that unicorn.
2019
01:31:23,541 --> 01:31:25,279
It's so cute!
2020
01:31:25,580 --> 01:31:27,448
Unicorns are lame.
2021
01:31:30,618 --> 01:31:32,520
You don't like unicorns?
2022
01:31:33,488 --> 01:31:35,475
- Eh.
- What?
2023
01:31:35,505 --> 01:31:37,462
I... I just...
2024
01:31:37,492 --> 01:31:39,694
I'm not crazy about 'em.
2025
01:31:39,760 --> 01:31:42,697
How can you not like unicorns?
2026
01:31:43,130 --> 01:31:45,132
I... I think they're creepy.
2027
01:31:45,162 --> 01:31:46,337
- Creepy?
- Yes,
2028
01:31:46,367 --> 01:31:48,771
especially when they're looking
over the bed.
2029
01:31:48,801 --> 01:31:51,175
Look, a human interacting
with a computer
2030
01:31:51,205 --> 01:31:53,908
is interesting, you know?
But when a human interacts
2031
01:31:53,938 --> 01:31:55,710
with a unicorn...
2032
01:31:56,544 --> 01:32:00,114
- not as much, okay?
- Unicorns are interesting.
2033
01:32:00,144 --> 01:32:02,216
I just... I think
you're a beautiful,
2034
01:32:02,246 --> 01:32:03,120
lovely, attractive woman.
2035
01:32:03,150 --> 01:32:06,053
I think you should just limit
how much you talk about unicorns
2036
01:32:06,083 --> 01:32:07,191
in front of people, okay?
2037
01:32:07,221 --> 01:32:08,789
I just don't want you
to be uncomfortable
2038
01:32:08,819 --> 01:32:10,027
when you meet the TED people.
2039
01:32:10,057 --> 01:32:12,994
So maybe not, you know,
don't talk about them too much
2040
01:32:13,024 --> 01:32:14,729
in front of everyone.
2041
01:32:19,500 --> 01:32:20,768
Huh.
2042
01:32:21,702 --> 01:32:24,572
I want to be monogamous,
but not with you.
2043
01:32:25,706 --> 01:32:28,609
- What?
- I want to date other people.
2044
01:32:29,477 --> 01:32:31,045
Are... are you kidding?
2045
01:32:31,812 --> 01:32:33,447
I'm a unicorn.
2046
01:32:33,915 --> 01:32:35,449
What? I...
2047
01:32:35,479 --> 01:32:36,621
What are you saying?
2048
01:32:36,651 --> 01:32:40,454
You don't like unicorns,
and that's a deal breaker.
2049
01:32:42,390 --> 01:32:44,158
Let's be friends.
2050
01:32:59,840 --> 01:33:02,209
♪ Ooh ♪
2051
01:33:05,546 --> 01:33:08,215
♪ That feels ♪
2052
01:33:09,350 --> 01:33:11,552
♪ Inside ♪
2053
01:33:13,688 --> 01:33:17,124
♪ All I ever want ♪
2054
01:33:17,425 --> 01:33:20,928
♪ All I could ever need ♪
2055
01:33:20,958 --> 01:33:25,866
♪ You and I ♪
2056
01:33:28,302 --> 01:33:33,074
♪ You and I ♪
2057
01:33:33,641 --> 01:33:35,313
You are loved.
2058
01:33:35,343 --> 01:33:39,280
This feeling
is always inside of you.
2059
01:33:39,310 --> 01:33:42,600
♪ And all I could ever see ♪
2060
01:33:42,630 --> 01:33:45,890
♪ All I could ever want ♪
2061
01:33:45,920 --> 01:33:50,458
♪ All I could ever need
Is you ♪
2062
01:34:04,271 --> 01:34:07,041
Hey.
2063
01:34:07,071 --> 01:34:07,945
What are you doing here?
2064
01:34:07,975 --> 01:34:10,429
Um, I wrote the script
about the witches.
2065
01:34:10,459 --> 01:34:12,883
Honey, that's incredible.
2066
01:34:12,913 --> 01:34:15,886
Wow, that's great.
2067
01:34:15,916 --> 01:34:18,370
How... how did you know
where I live?
2068
01:34:18,400 --> 01:34:20,825
I stole Peter's contacts, yo.
2069
01:34:20,855 --> 01:34:23,124
You know,
you're really nice to me.
2070
01:34:23,791 --> 01:34:25,626
And nice is sexy.
2071
01:34:25,656 --> 01:34:26,664
Nice is sexy, yo.
2072
01:34:26,694 --> 01:34:29,281
♪ I learned this 'cause
I've been nicer to myself ♪
2073
01:34:29,311 --> 01:34:31,899
♪ And now I see it
See I'm like a little tree ♪
2074
01:34:31,929 --> 01:34:33,170
♪ I need to nurture myself ♪
2075
01:34:33,200 --> 01:34:35,302
♪ With some happy
Little thoughts ♪
2076
01:34:35,332 --> 01:34:37,004
♪ And that's what I did yo ♪
2077
01:34:37,034 --> 01:34:38,639
Da-da-dum, blossom.
2078
01:34:39,573 --> 01:34:41,575
Do you want to go on a date?
2079
01:34:42,276 --> 01:34:45,212
More than ever.
2080
01:34:46,547 --> 01:34:48,019
Ta-dah!
2081
01:34:48,049 --> 01:34:50,484
- Aw!
- We're so proud of you.
2082
01:34:50,514 --> 01:34:51,389
Yeah!
2083
01:34:51,419 --> 01:34:52,890
You're the orgasming champion!
2084
01:34:52,920 --> 01:34:55,156
- Oh, thank you.
- And the masturbating champion!
2085
01:34:55,186 --> 01:34:57,491
I'm not sure
who I was competing against,
2086
01:34:57,521 --> 01:34:58,996
but I'm glad I won!
2087
01:34:59,026 --> 01:35:01,313
I want to light a candle
for our friendship,
2088
01:35:01,343 --> 01:35:03,631
'cause I'm really grateful
for you guys.
2089
01:35:12,640 --> 01:35:15,810
I heard this music
and it made me think of you.
2090
01:35:23,284 --> 01:35:27,655
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2091
01:35:27,685 --> 01:35:29,960
♪ Is real is real is real ♪
2092
01:35:29,990 --> 01:35:34,195
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2093
01:35:34,225 --> 01:35:36,400
♪ Is real is real is real ♪
2094
01:35:36,430 --> 01:35:40,868
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2095
01:35:40,898 --> 01:35:43,240
♪ Is real is real is real ♪
2096
01:35:43,270 --> 01:35:47,475
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2097
01:35:47,505 --> 01:35:49,980
♪ Is real is real is real ♪
2098
01:35:50,010 --> 01:35:53,114
♪ A kiss good night
A kiss by darkness ♪
2099
01:35:53,144 --> 01:35:56,020
♪ A kiss to all the end
Of rain ♪
2100
01:35:56,050 --> 01:35:59,421
♪ To stall this night
To stall this darkness ♪
2101
01:35:59,451 --> 01:36:02,793
♪ To stall this night
To the end of days ♪
2102
01:36:02,823 --> 01:36:06,994
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2103
01:36:07,024 --> 01:36:09,463
Cut!
2104
01:36:09,730 --> 01:36:13,402
♪ Don't you wanna know
That magic is real ♪
2105
01:36:13,432 --> 01:36:17,104
♪ Don't you wanna have
Something to feel ♪
2106
01:36:17,134 --> 01:36:17,942
♪ One life ♪
2107
01:36:17,972 --> 01:36:22,176
♪ And the world
Will open doorways ♪
2108
01:36:22,206 --> 01:36:24,582
I love my pussy!
2109
01:36:24,612 --> 01:36:28,983
- Yes to orgasms!
- Yes to orgasms!
2110
01:36:29,183 --> 01:36:31,989
Yes
2111
01:36:32,019 --> 01:36:34,692
to orgasms!
2112
01:36:34,722 --> 01:36:37,995
Yes to orgasms!
2113
01:36:38,025 --> 01:36:41,729
Masters and Johnson taught us
that an orgasm was just,
2114
01:36:41,759 --> 01:36:44,632
you know, like,
up, down, like, quick.
2115
01:36:44,662 --> 01:36:47,568
It isn't. You can train yourself
2116
01:36:47,598 --> 01:36:49,073
to have an extended,
2117
01:36:49,103 --> 01:36:53,641
massive orgasm.
Isn't that amazing?
2118
01:36:54,141 --> 01:36:55,546
Who here would like to learn
2119
01:36:55,576 --> 01:36:59,313
how to have an extended,
massive orgasm?
2120
01:37:01,315 --> 01:37:03,684
Who here would like
to learn how to have
2121
01:37:03,714 --> 01:37:05,920
an earth-shattering orgasm?
2122
01:37:09,256 --> 01:37:14,595
♪ And I will believe in us ♪
2123
01:37:18,265 --> 01:37:19,937
I tell my pussy that I love her.
2124
01:37:19,967 --> 01:37:23,204
I love you, pussy. I love you.
I love you so much.
2125
01:37:23,234 --> 01:37:27,775
You're a sweet, sweet,
sweet little puss.
2126
01:37:29,543 --> 01:37:34,215
♪ I will believe in you ♪
2127
01:37:35,716 --> 01:37:40,988
♪ And I will believe in us ♪
2128
01:37:41,989 --> 01:37:47,528
♪ And I will believe
That all of this is true ♪
2129
01:37:48,796 --> 01:37:54,796
♪ And I will believe in us
Tonight ♪
2130
01:37:54,840 --> 01:37:56,040
♪ Tonight ♪
2131
01:37:56,070 --> 01:37:59,707
♪ Just for once don't you wanna
Know magic is real ♪
2132
01:37:59,737 --> 01:38:02,146
♪ Is real is real is real ♪
2133
01:38:02,176 --> 01:38:06,413
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2134
01:38:06,443 --> 01:38:08,819
♪ Is real is real is real ♪
2135
01:38:08,849 --> 01:38:13,120
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2136
01:38:13,150 --> 01:38:15,426
♪ Is real is real is real ♪
2137
01:38:15,456 --> 01:38:19,560
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2138
01:38:19,590 --> 01:38:22,032
♪ Is real is real is real ♪
2139
01:38:22,062 --> 01:38:25,532
♪ A kiss goodnight
A kiss by darkness ♪
2140
01:38:25,562 --> 01:38:28,472
♪ A kiss to all the end
Of rain ♪
2141
01:38:28,502 --> 01:38:31,890
♪ To stall this night
To stall this darkness ♪
2142
01:38:31,920 --> 01:38:35,279
♪ To stall this night
Till the end of days ♪
2143
01:38:35,309 --> 01:38:40,547
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2144
01:38:55,934 --> 01:38:57,134
♪ Just for once ♪
2145
01:38:57,164 --> 01:39:01,969
♪ Just for once
Don't you wanna know ♪
2146
01:39:02,507 --> 01:39:03,707
♪ Just for once ♪
2147
01:39:03,737 --> 01:39:08,275
♪ Just for once
Don't you wanna know ♪
2148
01:39:08,475 --> 01:39:12,746
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2149
01:39:12,776 --> 01:39:15,085
♪ Is real is real is real ♪
2150
01:39:15,115 --> 01:39:19,286
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2151
01:39:19,316 --> 01:39:21,692
♪ Is real is real is real ♪
2152
01:39:21,722 --> 01:39:25,826
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2153
01:39:25,856 --> 01:39:28,299
♪ Is real is real is real ♪
2154
01:39:28,329 --> 01:39:32,399
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2155
01:39:32,429 --> 01:39:34,972
♪ Is real is real is real ♪
2156
01:39:35,002 --> 01:39:39,006
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2157
01:39:39,036 --> 01:39:41,612
♪ Is real is real is real ♪
2158
01:39:41,642 --> 01:39:45,846
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2159
01:39:45,876 --> 01:39:50,084
♪ Is real is real is real ♪
2160
01:39:54,722 --> 01:39:57,376
Presenting
2161
01:39:57,406 --> 01:40:00,060
pussy!
155071
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