All language subtitles for Chasing.the.Rain.2020

Provided by explosiveskull
https://twitter.com/kaboomskull
M_I_SForEver

Last night,
I dreamt of a steady,

cool rain falling out
of the African sky,

soaking me to my bones.

I watched as my filth
pooled at my feet,

the raindrops washing
away my stories.

That I was free.

But then I awoke, choking on
the dust of this dry place.

And I wondered if
hope does exist

for people who are desperate

and have nothing
else to cling to.

I have to know.

Because if hope is stupid,

why would anything matter?

Balls, it is so
effin' hot out here.

Yeah?

Hell of an experience though.

Feels so good to be
making a difference.

Oh.

Shit, I had the total runs for
the first two days straight.

I seriously thought I was
gonna perish out here.

My parents wanted me
to fly back early,

but I was like WWJD?

Oh, whoa!

That feels right.

You've been here longer
than I have though.

Bet you can't wait to get home?

Do you have any
Jamba Juice, dude?

Come, come.

Come here.

You need to move it.

Twist it tight.

Righty-tighty, lefty-loosey.

College boy,
we have to work, please.

That sign, you can mix it.

All right, all right.

That is the fourth
child that she will bury.

This droughts,
they devastate us.

This one seems
longer than the last.

We pray to God to help but,

He's silent.

Sorry.

Where the hell is he?

Excuse me. Sorry.

Hey, what's up Kelley?

I'm looking for
your idiot roommate.

Why? Did you guys
break up again?

No, why?

Are you Stu's roommate?

Yo, broski.

Is it the 14th already, man?

I was gonna have this place
all spiffed and shined for ya.

Come here.

Oh yeah, man.

I am totally getting
the bad ass vibe

off you with the
beard and the tan.

How was Somalia?

Kenya.

Kenya, right.

Hey, you need to come join us.

Lots of inebriated females
making bad decisions.

Let's party.

Let's party.

I would but-

- All right, see you out there.

Oh, shit.

Look who's here.

Hey, welcome back.

- How are you?
- I can't believe it.

How was Africa?

I'll talk to you in a minute.

We've got some really
good news today.

Working along with
many other organizations

to raise money for relief help,

and to build wells
in communities

with no access to clean water.

No, no, no, no. Just hold.

What are you doing? Stop.

Okay. What, what lens are...

You're using a 50 millimeter.

You've got like the
bridge of the Queen Mary,

between you and her.

You know what? We're gonna
Photoshop a little baby there.

What an adorable, next
Fredericks of Hollywood.

I think that if
I would, maybe..

I'll just try a couple.

I'll just try a couple on my own

and we'll see how,
if it turns out

and then we can go from there.

No, her neck is fine.

It's gonna look
good in the lens.

You're seeing in
3D with two eyes,

the lens sees with 1D.

I want you to learn this.

Watch, watch with your
two-dimensional eyes.

I see.

And learn. Freeze don't...

No, no, no, no, no.

That, if she moves half an inch

is gonna shatter
the beauty of the...

It's better.

Seriously, could my
day get any crappier?

Okay, bye.

I loved painting that one.

It's beautiful.

What's it about?

That beauty surrounds us.

How much is it?

You any good?

Oh.

Nah.

My dad volunteers
teaching an art class

at a homeless shelter.

He's obsessed with photography.

So why was your day so bad?

What?

Oh yeah.

I have a flat tire and
I don't have a car jack

and just some
other stupid stuff.

I don't wanna bore you with my
life's insignificant details.

But it's your life.

How could the details
be insignificant?

Thanks.

I have a car jack you could use.

I can't believe
I don't even have a spare.

I think I have one
in my car that'll fit.

No, no, no, I don't
wanna take your tire.

It's okay. I'll be right back

You
from around here?

Yep. You?

Yep.

I graduate from the U this
spring with an art degree.

Oh.

Everything okay?

Yeah.

So what do you wanna
do after you graduate?

I don't know.

Teach, I guess.

You guess?

I wanna teach, just...

- Vanessa.
- It's nothing. I'm sorry.

I had a meeting with
my advisor yesterday.

He completely tore my
senior project to shreds.

He said that it
lacked distinction

or originality or whatever.

I always wanted
to have, you know,

like an art gallery
or something some day.

Nothing big or fancy, I just...

I feel really stupid right now.

I don't know why I'm
telling you this. I'm sorry.

Just paint whatever
pulls you out of bed

in the middle of the night,

and people will stand
in line to see that.

And then kind of,.

Just wait.

Move over.

Watch this, watch this.

Dutch angle candid.

Just slightly over.

Yes.

- Perfect.
- That's good.

- Do you see that?
- That's good.

That's the magic.

I just don't know.
They're all so good.

Yes, Steve did a great job.

You're very photogenic.

You are so sweet.

And who knew I
could look 25 again?

Hey, Eric.

Some chick holding a tire
is out front asking for you.

So, what do you think?

I'm thinking...

I'm thinking you should
get a 24 by 36 of that.

Of this one.

I think we should do 36 wallets.

What do you think
about that one?

Genius.

Hey.

I never got your number.
I gave you mine but...

And I couldn't remember
where you worked.

So I checked every store
with a photo studio attached

like a stalker,

but I promised you that
I'd get your tire back.

So here it is.

Some of these photos
are really something.

Yeah, those were
mostly taken by Steve.

My boss.

I love that one.

Oh yeah.

That kid did not wanna be here.

Took about an hour
to calm him down.

You must be very patient.

Hey, I was gonna...

And I was
at a complete loss.

Oh, dude. I'm so
glad you're still here.

Stu, what are you doing here?

I dropped by
the old port stude

to see if you wanted
to grab some dinner,

but I overheard
you making plans.

And it's a good thing that I
was eavesdropping this time

because I locked myself
out of the apartment again.

And you turned off your phone.

- Hey.
- Hey

Vanessa. This is my-

- Stuart Halcombe.

I'm Eric's closest confidante.

Just don't lock
me out this time.

Absolutely, dude.

- All right. Cool.
- Nice to see you, Stu.

Bye.

He's...

What is that?

Hey, Vanessa. How're you doing?

So has Eric been telling
you about all the marathons

that he runs to raise money

for his charity
work in Ethiopia?

Hey, can we get some
more chips and salsa?

- You've been to Africa?
- Well, yeah.

- I mean, a little bit.
- Oh yeah. He's so modest.

You should totally get him
to show you the pictures

of him holding the sick babies.

It's just...

All right, so you know,
I've gotta go somewhere.

You need that back?

Okay, bye.

How long have you known him?

I met him two years
ago at a laundromat.

Oh my God.

I love the rain.

Well, that's fortunate.

You ready to run?

You first.

Go. Go, go, go, go, go, go.

Take my jacket.

It's wet. It's all wet.

Come on.

What are you...

Go in there.

Greetings, my dear child.

How long has it been since
your last confession?

So tell me about your mother.

Why?

I'm just kidding.

Oh.

Besides I
don't think priests ask

about that anyway.

Right, shrinks do.

Okay.

Let's ask each other deep and
invasive personal questions.

Why would we do that?

Because it's fun.

Tell me your biggest regret.

Okay. The biggest regret.

Do you routinely corner
people in confessional booths

to ask them personal questions?

No.

But since we are in one,
it seems fitting, right?

How about, have you
ever been in love?

No, not in the
way that you mean.

Which way is that?

The real way.

Okay, who is the most
influential person in your life?

Definitely my parents.

It's a tie.

Are you close with yours?

I never really knew my dad.

Why not?

He left before I was born.

Isn't that two questions?

And your mom?

She's not around anymore.

Did she die?

Yeah.

Oh Eric, I'm so sorry.

Holy shit.

I thought I was
gonna pee my pants.

How did he not see you?

I don't know.

When he started
praying with you,

I hightailed it out of there.

And just ran as fast as I can.

Oh, yeah.

Since when do you iron?

I got a fellowship
interview today.

So, what's the deal with her?

What?

Oh, come on, man.

You've been like a monk
for the last three years.

The least you can
do is rollick me

with a few self-indulgent
superficial details.

I don't know.

She invited me to her
parents' place Thursday

for Thanksgiving.

Let me get this straight.

On your first date,

she wants to spend
like 14 hours with you.

Then she invites you
to her folks' house

for a major holiday?

And all this time,

I thought you needed
remedial help with women.

So are you going?

Nah, I got too
much stuff to do.

Come to Chicago with me.

You know my mom likes
you better anyway.

I'll be back by Friday night.

I can't. I gotta work
Friday at 5:00 a.m.

Pictures with Santa, remember?

Yay.

Have fun with that.

And my goal in
running this marathon

is to raise money for
one, maybe even two wells.

Huge tax deduction
for your organization.

Okay, sure. No.

Even a small amount
would be great.

Hey, nice job.

Happy Thanksgiving, everybody.

Hi Vanessa. This is...

I am.

Yeah, thanks. It must've
been like a 24-hour thing.

I really appreciated dinner.

It was really kind of you.

So thanks.

Oh

Yes.

- Okay.
- Awesome.

Let's try another one.

Brian, look alive.

Oh, right.

Three, two...

Intelligent, look intelligent.

Great.

Brian, tilt and Tricia tilt.

And three, two, One.

Perfect.

Try to think of some thoughts.

Just take one more.

Edward Whitney.

What are you doing?

You said he's a
philosophy professor

at my place of education.

He wrote a book called

"Finding Jesus in the Dark Room:

Snapshots of Faith and Doubt".

Why would you take a
leak off the Berlin wall?

Well, my sergeant and I
actually just wanted pictures

of us standing on the wall.

I still don't know why we peed.

The good news is that our names

weren't on the
ambassador's apology

to the East German people.

So you teach philosophy?

Don't miss the donut by
looking through the hole.

A thousand men cannot
undress one naked man.

Sorry.

Yes, I teach philosophy.

Vanessa says that you
are a photographer?

Yes, sir.

Just most family
portraits, mostly.

Just?

My family portraits are the
most mysterious and fascinating.

Just think if those
photos could speak up.

Yeah, that's true.

Are you Lutheran?

Lutheran...

Were you at least
baptized as an infant,

or were you dipped?

Mama, could you come
with me in the kitchen?

I was just getting to know
Vanessa's new little friend.

My grandma has been
trying to set me up

with her church organist
for like three years.

And?

Well, he's 40
and really creepy.

Hey, but at least
he's a Lutheran.

Yeah, that's true.

Whatever.

That is JP, my
parents' foster kid,

and he is such a jerk.

Says a lot about your parents.

Yeah. Well my dad, his
mom died when he was 15.

He was basically
alone from then on.

You're putting too
much on the plate.

You're doing a great job.

- They'll fall off.
- Mama, come on.

- Come on, mama.
- Oh, grandma, grandma.

Put this right there.

You do such a good
job with that.

Eric, darling, can you
take the punch bowl

and put it on the table and
then come back in and finish?

You're doing a great job.

Mom, oh my God.
These are so cute.

You made every single one

and you made the walnut ones?

- I'm so sorry.
- There you go.

You know what? I
think you missed a spot.

Shut up.

Here, I grabbed one
of my dad's shirts.

You wanna give me
yours and I'll wash it?

No, thanks. It'll dry.

You're covered in punch
and it's gonna stain.

It's just an old shirt.

Eric, just change
your damn shirt.

I don't need to,
so just drop it.

Quieter out here, isn't it?

Oh, I'm sorry.

I didn't mean to scare you.

No, I just got this new camera

and I was experimenting
with the low light.

Nice.

Hey, come here.

Let me show you something.

Come on.

Voila!

Wow. This is great.

Ed, I
need you for a sec.

Oh yeah, Bonnie. Be right up.

Here, make yourself at home.

Okay.

Where's Ed?

I think he'll be
back in a minute.

I'm Eric, Vanessa's friend.

No.

So, are you into art too?

I think it's
exceedingly lame actually.

Except for photography, right?

Here, let me show you
something pretty cool.

This was a couple of weeks ago.

JP.

What have I told you
about smoking in here?

We'll talk about this later.

Sorry about that.

JP's been a tough nut to crack,

and today he disrespected
Bonnie and I snapped.

I said some things to him I
probably shouldn't have said

knowing his history,
and tried to apologize,

but I don't really
think it was enough.

Oh, it's enough.

He's probably more
impressed with you now.

Why is that?

Because you made a
mistake and apologized.

Sometimes that's even better

than never making
a mistake at all.

Got my first camera when
I was stationed in Korea.

I just couldn't put it down.

These are great.

I do love art because I think

it's one of the
few things in life

that you really don't have
to understand to create.

I mean, you can
have contradictions

and doubts, insecurities.

Vanna showed me some
of your photographs.

They're exquisite.

You have quite a talent.

Thanks.

Stu says you're
saving for college.

You know, the US National Press

has a scholarship
contest for photography.

You should really consider
entering one of your photos.

No, I'm serious.

You should.

I see the sun
struggling for attention

through the trembling branches.

And the cold wind whispers
our approaching fate.

I've pushed the
envelope of propriety

standing so close to her canvas.

I'm captivated by
her colorful layers,

her deep strokes are miniature
mountains reaching out to me,

making valleys shadow
in the cool lights.

But I'm a shadow too,
sewn to her feet,

with her as she walks.

And she talks to
me as if I'm real.

Are you warm enough?

- Yes.
- You're sure.

Yes.

But it's really cold up here.

I just don't want
you to get sick.

But my awkwardness protects me.

And like her shadow,

I fade and wish the
sun would never set.

But if I confessed,

there'd be no reason
to wait for a reply,

knowing full well
this thing will die.

Hey dude.

- Hey.
- Hey.

I'm done.

You've written four sentences.

That was hard.

I need candy.

Hey, you know, most guys

that are trying to
avoid a relationship

just ignore the chick.

You know, stop calling.

They don't run off to
a third world country.

It is a bit drastic.

It's not what I'm doing.

And you need to stop
reading my mail.

I thought it was mine.

From Africa Water Venture?

I care about
Africa too, you know?

Shut up.

What?

So you leaving again?

You okay?

Do you actually
think these look good?

What is the matter with you?

I took a chance on you when
you didn't even have an address

or a phone number to
put on an application.

And I have been good to you.

I gave you some amazingly
fashionable work clothes.

I gave you 32 bucks
of my own money

to sponsor you in that marathon

for your little Africa thing.

And why?

Why Eric?

Don't speak.

Because you were one of the
best damned photographers

I had ever seen.

But lately, you are late.

Your work has been
subpar at best.

I mean, where is the art?

Where is the craft?

Steve, are you serious?

You take pictures in a mall.

Of people sitting in
front of fake backdrops

like the grand Canyon,

that we then Photoshop
the hell out of.

What did you say?

I'm sorry.

I'll redo the session
on my own time.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry, kid.

You're fired.

What?

Yeah.

F-R-I-E-D.

There's a problem
with the well we built.

It's contaminated.

They had to shut it down.

What?

They can't do
that. They need it.

It's contaminated by
some form of arsenic.

That's impossible.
We tested it.

Yeah, but Eric, contaminants
can migrate for miles.

We need to fix it.

There's no money to fix it.

Donations are down.

I can hardly even pay the
lease to keep our door open.

We can't just sit
here and do nothing.

They're depriving communities
of clean water because donors,

governments and
nongovernmental organizations

have built infrastructure

and then just ignored the
need to maintain them.

I know, I know. I'm sorry.

Okay. All right.

Yeah, thank you.

I'm sorry.

Eric.

Eric.

Hey, buddy.

I'm back from Chicago.

How'd the marathon go?

Dude, you look like hell.

- Are you sick?
- What?

Hey, aren't you
going with Vanessa

to an art party tonight?

And you are a little musty.

You might wanna shower it up.

You look beautiful.

Where have you been?

I'm sorry I'm late.

I've been calling
you for days.

I misplaced my phone.

And I came by, are you okay?

- You don't look good.
- I'm fine.

Sorry I didn't call you.

I'll be right back.

Hey...

What are you doing?

You smoke?

No.

Then why are you smoking?

I don't smoke.

It was just one cigarette.

Okay Eric, what's going on?

I'm leaving.

Okay. Well, wait
I'll go with you.

No, Vanessa.

I'm going back to
Kenya, I leave Monday.

What?

When will you be back?

I'm not coming back.

You're kidding, right?

I always said
I was going back.

Yeah, for like a little
mission trip or something.

Not to go there indefinitely.

And what, you're
going in two days?

- Where's the fire?
- It hasn't rained.

There's no water.

The villages are waste
and full of disease-

- So I'm a horrible person
for not wanting you to go?

'cause I thought
that you and I...

So what? This it, huh?

I'm just gonna get like
a Christmas form letter

from you once a
year, and that's it?

Vanessa...

No.

Have I been huffing spray
paint this entire time

or have you almost
been pretending

like there's not something

not going on between
us, on purpose?

Just because I'm leaving
doesn't mean that I don't...

This isn't easy.

What it isn't easy?

Tell me the truth.

It never would've
worked between us.

What if we're longing
for day to break

but night has already
strangled the dawn in her bed?

What if hope is just a
tale we tell ourselves

and there's nothing
else to hold on to?

I came to this place
to feel normal,

but someone is still
pressing me down on my back.

My mind is throbbing,

my hands weakening,

and my pictures
are slipping away.

Hey, Eric.

You know I'm surprised to
see you sleeping on the job.

Eric, are you okay?

Eric, are you okay?

Come, can you get up?

Yeah.

Okay, just lie back.

I can't
move. I can't move.

Okay Eric, don't worry.

We're going to get
you to a doctor.

It's okay. We're going
to get you to a doctor.

How are you feeling?

Better.

Thank you.

Eric, arrangements
have been made for you

to be sent home.

No, no, no.

I'll be fine here.

Look, I will be very
sorry to see you go,

but our doctor is very concerned

at how weak you still are.

American hospitals can help
you much more than we can here.

No, no, Matua.

Please.

I need to stay.

I'm begging you.

You clicked like,
and then all of a sudden,

you was talking about
some matters of the heart

on his status.

What, you aren't fucking
lying to me right now.

No, this bitch.

She's got too much respect...

I don't understand.

Basically, your
immune system thinks

your spinal cord has an
infection, even though it doesn't.

So it's making antibodies

that are attacking the myelin
cells of your optic nerve

and your healthy spinal cord.

Eric, we don't know
exactly what causes this

and it's very rare,

but there's nothing you
could've done to prevent it.

What's gonna happen to me?

A household water heater

can boil hundreds of gallons
of water a day, right?

But this wouldn't be an
ordinary gravity filter.

I mean, this would...

Hello.

I'm sorry.

This wouldn't be an
ordinary gravity filter.

You could use the pumps

to force the water
through the filter.

I know, but I'm
not a scientist...

Okay, I understand.

Oh God.

Oh God, help me.

Oh God, help me.

This episode
was much more severe

than the mild ones he's had

and caused irreversible
inflammation of his spinal cord.

Optica is progressing...

He has some left arm paralysis
and right leg weakness.

Optic nerve damage causing
significantly blurred division.

Of a chronic pain and
become more disabled

throughout his life.

I'm so sorry.

Hey.

How you doing?

The doctor said that
you've responded great

to the medication.

So that's great.

I made some new
playlists for you.

I'll just put 'em
on your table there.

You know, you don't
need to feel weird

or anything around me.

Not that you would or
should for that matter.

Besides, my mom already
bought you all this new crap

from Ikea that she
made me put together.

So you can't really
decide to move now.

All right.

Well, hey, I gotta
get going to class,

but I'll stop by afterwards.

Okay?

Okay.

Well, yeah, I'll see you later.

Be careful.

Okay.

That's cool.

I got you.

Easy.

Easy does it.

Any change?

I've been concerned

because you skipped
several appointments.

I'm sorry.

I've just been really busy
with the holidays and all.

I see.

And how have you been adjusting?

Just peachy.

Eric, I would encourage
you to utilize the services

that are available
to assist you.

Now, it's a little trickier
with the blurry vision

and the leg weakness
and the arm immobility.

Thank you for that
comprehensive recap.

Sure thing.

Here you go.

Okay. That's where we are today.

Now, it's very important
for you to learn

to do things for yourself,

so you don't have to depend
on other people all the time.

Wow.

That was beautiful.

I think I'll needlepoint that
and put it above the mantle.

Shit.

I'm reaching him.

I truly believe that
I have the favor of God.

And the good news is that
the Lord wants all of us

to have thriving
and abundant lives.

He wants everyone of us to
be healthy and successful.

I have a vibrant life filled
with blessing I don't deserve.

Blessing after blessing after
blessing after blessing...

Hey.

It sounds like God
is your trophy wife.

Eric.

Been a while since you stopped
by here to argue with me.

Everything all right?

Oh, you know, other than
having a fucked spinal cord,

just living the dream.

Spinal cord?

I'm sorry.

That's it?

And if you need
His healing powers,

just call on Him
and He'll be there.

Amen and hallelujah.

Oh my God.

It's a miracle.

Are you serious?

How's it feel to get out?

Well, feels good to me.

Oh, hey.

Do you mind if I say hi to
a buddy of mine from school?

Go.

Cool.

What's up?

Hey, Stu. How are you?

How are you doin', man.

Good to see you, buddy.

How was Africa?

I love your tan.

Oh my God.

Vanessa.

Hey.

How the hell are you?

You know what?

I would totally
invite you to join us,

but we were just about to leave.

No, I'm not
staying. I'm just...

My roommate thought
she saw you here

and I didn't believe her.

What's happened to
you? You look awful.

Thanks.

I'm fine.

How long have you been back?

It didn't work out?

Did you get my drawing?

Oh, you know
what? That's my bad.

Dude, I'm sorry.

I totally forgot to give it...

You gave it to me.

No, I'm pretty
sure I forgot...

No, you didn't forget.

It was great.

Yeah, well you
said you never had

your portrait made before, so...

Congratulations on
winning that scholarship.

Your story and your
picture were really moving.

Can you believe they called
him an idealist though?

- This guy?
- My dad said

it might open up some new
doors for you for photography.

I'm doing some
new things instead.

Yeah, I can see that.

Basically you quit everything
when you get tired of it.

Well,

I never lied to you, Eric.

And I really hope I
never see you again.

I'm sorry, man.

Are you okay?

You told me she drew a circus.

I'm sorry.

I thought it would upset you.

What the hell
did you do in here?

She never wants
to see me again.

And you, you wouldn't
want to either

if you knew who I really am.

All right, you're
talking smack.

Shut up. I can't
even see shit.

Hey, hey, hey.

Do you know there are
millions of people

who are at risk of death
because of drought?

Good segue, buddy.

But yeah, I think I heard
something about that.

See, here's the thing.

If I was God and I was gonna
drop a drought on some folks

for the hell of it, I
personally would at least try

to drop it on people
that could handle it.

Not people that are
hardly surviving as it is.

No, drunk man.

Area's just prone
to more droughts.

There's no cosmic conspiracy.

And seriously, why do you
keep trying to believe

in some supposedly omnipotent
being you don't even like?

I was just trying
to be a good person.

You're saying you want me
to record a message for Eric?

Yeah, it's this new
thing that Eric's doing.

He thinks that recorded messages

are more personal
than written ones.

Stu, what's going on?

Nothing.

Look, you said you didn't
ever wanna see him again.

He looked terrible when I saw-

- You know, well, time's
kinder to some of us.

So I'll have him
give you a call.

Stu.

Yeah.

Don't you have class?

You know what?

Seriously, what are the odds?

You know...

What are you doing?

Nothing.

Please stop leaving
your crap on the floor?

Yeah, you're right.

I'm sorry.

And even if
you're on a diet,

look at just some of the
great foods you can prepare

in your new Showtime rotisserie.

Hey, man.

Hey.

Anything good on?

No.

An eight-pound
mouthwatering pork loin roast-

- So there's this thing
I need to tell you,

but I'm not really
sure how to say it.

You could just say it.

Okay, brilliant.

Just promise me you're not
gonna try to kill the messenger.

Broski, you okay?

She freaked, man.

I didn't know what to do.

You should have
told me right away.

I tried, but she took off

and I had to make
sure she was okay.

What happened? Is she okay?

I chased her down the street
and we went out to coffee.

She was a total mess.

I missed my class
because she was sobbing

- for like two hours.
- I don't wanna hear this.

No, no, no. It's a good thing.

I think I helped her like
process it a little bit.

I gave her like the
basic Wikipedia version,

with maybe just a
little added commentary.

You promised me you would
never talk to her about this.

Dude, I promised that
like six months ago.

Besides, I kind of
figured the jig was up

when she was standing
at our front door

and you didn't even notice.

Shit man, I'm sorry.

She wants you to call her.

This does not go here.

I had to change a light bulb.

Whoopsie.

I got it. I got it.

I got a surprise for you before
I head off to the airport

that might cheer
you up a little bit.

So, I want to do our Christmas
gift exchange a little early.

You're kidding, right?

No, come on.

I know that you're still pissed

about the whole
Vanessa thing, but...

What is that?

It's a dog, homie.

Chill out.

That's not a dog.
It's a fricking hamster.

No, it's a teacup poodle.

Merry Christmas.

Do you wanna hold him?

Why the hell would
you give me a poodle?

What do you mean? They're
like the smartest breed.

Check it out. I already
taught them how to sit.

Sit.

Sit.

Oh, look at that, huh?

And his uncle's cousin's brother

was like a poodle
state champion.

I can't believe you did this.

Don't worry about the
apartment's no dog policy.

I talked to the manager.

I told him you needed him
and he said it was okay.

So I got you

a bed and some food,

and a bowl.

I don't want a dog.

Take him back.

You made him feel bad.

Hey man, it's cool.

I never asked if you
were a dog person.

I just thought that...

Well, I'm sure I can find
a nice geriatric couple

that'll take him or...

I appreciate you
thinking of me.

You know I'm only gonna
be in Aspen for a few days.

My parents still
want you to come.

That's nice.

Thank them for me.

You know, between my
classes and my internship,

I'm not really gonna be around
a whole lot next semester.

I should get going
to the airport.

So what do you want me
to do with tiny Tim here?

I mean, I'll take him
as soon as I get back.

Fine.

Okay.

What's that smell?

He took a dump in
my bed, didn't he?

It's a good
thing he's small.

Jeffrey.

I can't believe it.

I know I shouldn't be surprised
you're all grown up but...

How'd you find me?

The lady at the
library helped me.

It was a little bit tricky
using your middle name,

but I'd recognize these
baby blues anywhere.

And aren't you the
good little Samaritan?

And winning 10 grand to boot.

It's just a scholarship.

Who knew I'd raise
such a smarty pants.

It's freezing out here.

Are you gonna invite
me in or what?

Fuck.

Oh, look at the puppy.

He's so cute.

I don't...

I never heard of that before.

You're not...

It's not...

Fatal?

No, unfortunately not.

Well, no big deal. Shit happens.

Yeah, it does.

Here, let me.

Nice place you got here.

Live alone?

No.

You get a girlfriend?

No.

You get by okay?

Yup.

So are you clean?

Yeah.

A long time now.

Well, I'm surprised
to see you here.

Surprised?

That a mother would wanna see
her only child after 10 years?

It's 12.

It's the day after my
13th birthday, remember?

You got me a lottery ticket.

Of course I remember.

You just took off and I didn't
even know if you were alive.

Anyway,

I have to be somewhere.

I'll come by again and
lend a hand or something.

I remember being so sure

that I had picked the
winning numbers for you too.

Are you done?

Hey, you stupid
dog, where are you?

Come on, where'd you go?

Get out of the road, you bum.

Rough night?

Oh my God.

Where the hell am I?

Hell's about right.

Hey.

What's your name?

Amy.

What's wrong with you?

Several things.

What?

I was just looking at all
the religious books you've got.

Yeah, it was a phase.

You want 'em?

Phase?

So you're like an
atheist now or something?

I wish.

It's complicated.

How can it not be?

As for me, I definitely
believe in God.

You do?

Oh yes.

I love him.

No.

Just a second.

Eric, it's Ed.

- Hey.
- Hi.

Hey, I've been thinking
about you a lot lately.

How much I miss
having you around?

And not just 'cause you fix
things for me on the house.

JP and I were thinking about
doing a little fishing.

I thought I'd see
what you're up to.

Oh, come on. I'll take
you out for an hour.

I'll bring you back.

That's it.

I'm not really
feeling up to it today.

I appreciate what
you're trying to do.

Come on. You know, I
don't pull that crap.

I just want to hang out
a little bit, come on.

Who's your little friend?

I'm watching him for Stu.

Oh, bring him along.

We'll use him for bait.

Want some coffee?

No, thanks.

Ed, I'm sorry I never
called you back.

I meant to. I just-

- You had your reasons.

Christmas is such a
dichotomy, ain't it?

Happy for some, sad for others.

It's just a day.

I used to spend
every Christmas

waiting for my dad to come home.

Where was he?

Don't know.

Sometimes he'd be
gone for months,

but no matter what,
for whatever reason,

he'd always come
home for Christmas.

Christmas when I was 14, first
time that he never showed.

I had stayed up all night

like a little kid
waiting around for Santa.

When did he come back?

Never saw him again.

I hated that I kept hoping
that he'd show up every year.

Hell, I'm almost 70 years old.

I'm still hoping
he'll show up today.

It's crazy.

That's not crazy.

Vanna, what are
you doing here?

Mom told grandma
that Eric's with you

and grandma told me.

That big busybody.

- Hey, Eric.
- Hey.

Can I talk to you?

Actually, your dad was
just about to take me home.

Please?

You're kinda freaking me
out there being so quiet.

It's not really like you.

I'm sorry.

No, it's fine.

I just expected you to
hit me with 20 questions.

Well, yeah, I mean
I have questions-

- So your dad says
you're in grad school.

- Yeah.
- That's great.

That's great.

Eric, I want you to
come over to the house.

What?

- No.
- No, no, it's okay.

I mean, it's just my
grandparents there

and it's nothing big.

Just for a little while, please.

Please.

How about some of Ethel's
cranberry gelatin relish, Eric?

No, thank you.

Dad.

Here. That enough?

He said he didn't want any.

The boy's gotta
eat. He looks awful.

- Grandpa.
- Give him a ham.

He needs protein.

Dad, how are you
feeling these days?

Not good at all?

Eric, I still don't understand

what really happened to you.

Mama, let the boy eat.

No, no. It's okay.

I told you Ethel about
this wacky business

with his spinal column
eating away at itself.

It's so interesting that
it affects so many things.

I know. It's crazy, huh?

Well, don't you worry
about a thing, Eric.

I have many friends over
at the Lutheran Manor

who have problems
with their eyes,

or legs or their arms.

They're getting along just fine.

That's good to know.

I was in
there in the hospital

a couple of months ago
for the colon thing.

The oscopy.

They took out a
couple of polyps.

Uncle Howard
thinks Eric's problem

can be caused by glaucoma.

Glaucoma?

I have some glaucoma.

Poor
Eric. Such a shame.

And he was so handsome.

Now, he
looks like something

that crawled out of a trash bag.

He didn't look good,
I can tell you that.

Ho, ho, ho, ho.

Merry Christmas.

Oh, sorry.

You called Stu?

Yeah, I gotta get back.

Thursday
night into Friday,

those will be the worst
travel conditions.

This is a powerful winter storm.

There's the low pressure area.

Let's put this in the most-

- What the hell are you doing?

Why would you bring him here?

Bro, I'm sorry.

But it's nasty out there and
they even shut down the airport

right after I arrived.

It took me two
hours to drive here.

We're not gonna make
it back tonight.

It's a nightmare.

Corn relish comes shooting
out of me like bullets.

Maybe it'll be fun.

Some nice hot tea.

I'm so glad you
guys are staying.

It will be so much more
festive with you here.

Here we go.

Here you go, sweetie.

- No, thank you.
- Okay, sweetie.

I'm gonna put you
in Vanessa's room.

I hope you don't mind
sharing Vanessa's bed.

No.

We're both mature adults.

Good.

Do you wanna know
what I'm wearing?

Stu, jeez no.

Sorry.

I just know how you feel about
full disclosure these days.

Take your dog.

Hey, could I ask you something?

Yeah, shoot.

I mean, I can mostly tell,

but Vanessa looks the
same to you, right?

Yeah, I'd say so.

She was wearing this top thing

that you could totally see
her bra straps through,

and some jeans
that if I might add

were rather tight in the ass.

I never thought she
was particularly hot,

but she was pretty
smoking in 'em.

Well, I'm beat.

You don't snore, do you?

Stu, go back to sleep.

It's Ed.

Sorry, I heard a noise.

I thought I'd come see
if everything was okay.

I'm sorry, I didn't
mean to wake you.

That's okay.

No problem.

Well, goodnight.

Hey, Ed.

Yeah.

Do you remember
that woman from Kenya

I was telling you about?

Yeah.

Her entire life
has been nothing

but hunger and thirst, pain.

Suffering from day one.

It's heartbreaking.

Most people wouldn't even
give it a second thought.

But you do.

Do you think that
there are people

that are just doomed or cursed?

There's an old Navajo
proverb that I love.

It says you can't wake a man
who's pretending to be asleep.

Now, you can pretend that
you've thrown the towel in

and like, you're so pissed,
you can't even think straight,

but you're still wide
awake, aren't you?

- You wanna sit down?
- No.

You all right?

Hurt my ankle.

Oh man. How?

I went home last weekend.

Got in a fight with my stepdad.

Who won.

I did.

So the asshole pushed
me down the stairs.

It didn't hurt though.

Well, you're
tougher than I was.

Here, I wanted to give you this.

I'm not gonna
take your camera.

Right, 'cause I'm
really gonna be using it.

Here, I want you to have it.

What am I gonna do with it?

Probably just sell it.

That's all right.

Just before you sell
it, mess around with it.

Best way to learn.

Hey.

Hey.

Stu, ready?

Yeah, just about.

He's getting lectured by
my grandpa in Lutheranism

and the light bulb crisis.

Whoa, there's a trash can.

- Do you need help?
- No.

I've been praying
really hard for you.

You're going through
so much right now,

but if you just hang in there,

things are gonna get better.

Look, I'm just trying to...

Well, I don't need you to.

Fine.

You know, it must be so
awesome going through life

not needing anything or anyone.

I'm gonna go find Stu.

Okay. Yeah.

Let's see you go find Stu.

What do you want
from me, Vanessa?

Nothing.

You know, I used
to want you though.

Not that that matters now.

I would have been
there for you though.

Why?

To tell me stuff like
things are gonna get better?

Is that wrong?

Yes.

Because sometimes they don't.

Or is that just foreign
to someone like you?

What is your problem with me?

Is my life not tragic
enough for you or something?

Like how much crap do
I have to go through

for you to sanction me

into your elite
little suffering club?

Just stop it.

Do I have to lose my parents

or have my face ripped
off by barbed wire

or be starving with malaria?

Would any of that
be enough for you?

- What?
- What?

What did you just
say about barbed wire?

I don't know.

I read about a woman
whose face got ripped off

by barbed wire when she
was climbing a fence.

It's not funny. It's horrible.

I know.

Having your face ripped off
by barbed wire sounds awful.

I just don't think I
ever want something bad

to happen to you.

What?

What's going on, Eric?

What's going on?

It's my fine, it's
fine, it's fine.

What, what?

Sit down.

It's my leg.

It's fine. It's normal.

It's fine.

- What can I do?
- Nothing.

This was a mistake coming here.

Eric.

Wait.

Shit.

You know, I used to
stare at your paintings

trying to figure you out?

They only told me
what I already knew

after talking to you
for five minutes.

I know what
you're trying to do.

You're just scared
of facing things

you don't have the answers for.

You're scared of
opening your eyes

and seeing things
as they really are.

V, I'm sorry.

Just so you know, I don't...

Crap. Kelley's here.

Where have you been?

At Vanessa's
house. I texted you.

You texted me?

Yeah.

It's Christmas
day, you schlarb.

I know. I drove
as fast as I could.

What are you talking about?

Do you know how
long I was waiting?

You do this every time.

I was sitting there
with my parents.

They were wondering
where you were.

Someone has got
to say something.

Eric, are you aware that
every time we go out,

Stu insists on coming
back here to check on you?

That is not true.

Look, I know that
you got a raw deal,

but you have got to stop
relying on Stu for everything.

I don't need Stu.

See, I told you.

So Eric
has nothing to do

with you turning down
that fellowship in Belize?

What fellowship?

You know?

I told you.

- No, you didn't.
- Really?

I thought that...

It's nothing.

I decided not to take it anyway.

Why not?

Come on.

Who wants to live in Belize?

Besides, you know I hate
moving, and the ocean.

It was a great opportunity,

and he was handpicked
out of 1000 applicants.

I didn't wanna take it.

So drop it.

- You are such a liar.
- Shut up, Kelley.

No, you know what?

I am not gonna sit back and
watch you trash your life

because someone else
chooses to trash theirs.

If I find out that
I had anything to do

with you not taking
that fellowship...

Why would you do that?

Why did you have
to do that today?

Because somebody
had to say something.

No, I would have told
him if you would...

When were you gonna tell him?

It doesn't matter.

I don't need your
help with this.

- You don't need my help?
- No, I don't.

- Okay.
- Goodbye. Merry Christmas.

Hey, man.

Hey, I'm sorry about that.

She's pissed, because I
won't move in with her.

Yeah, well, she's
right about one thing.

You're a liar.

Go to Belize.

What if I did go?

And what would you do?

You spend all the money
Uncle Sam gives you

on nothing but booze,
cigarettes and cereal.

Wear the same two disgusting
shirts all the time

and you generally look like
complete and utter shit.

So yeah, man. Yeah.

You're the poster child
of self sufficiency.

- Absolutely.
- It's my life.

Yup. It is.

What's all this shit of
indeterminate origin?

You're doing drugs now?

How about your scholarship?

Plan on using it?

- No.
- Yeah.

I guess it's kinda
hard to go to college

if you haven't finished
high school yet.

You got a letter from the
department of education

asking when you're
gonna start your GED.

Can't just cease to
exist, so how about it?

Did you even finish high school?

Why do you care?

I don't even know.

God.

In the few years
of living together,

you'd figure it's something
that might've come up.

The least you can do is
let some sunlight in here.

What the hell for, you moron.

For vitamin fucking
D man. I don't know.

You know what? You're just
pissed 'cause you're stuck here.

I'm not stuck here.
I'm going back to Kenya.

Oh my God. That's ludicrous.

God, man. You're screwed
up, you know that?

Man, I don't even think
you care about Kenya.

I think you just use
them as an excuse

so you can get out of here.

Get off me.

Get off me.

Not now, JP.

Take a 'lude, Vanna.

Eric gave me his camera.

He did?

And I threw all of his
pictures on your dad's computer.

Thought you might like to see
them before I delete them.

Stay right there.

I'm gonna grab a camera.

Matua, I'll be able to get
around on my own, I promise.

You won't have to
do anything for me.

I'll live in the village.
I'll sleep anywhere.

All I want is to come back.

Come here, little guy.

Jeffrey.

It's mom.

Open up.

Jeffrey.

Honey, I need your help.

I lost my job and I just
need to borrow a little cash.

- You're strung out.
- No, no, I promise.

I can smell the
drugs all over you.

No, I'm not.

I was with some people that use,

but it's all behind me, I swear.

Listen honey, I need you.

No, stop it, stop it.

Listen. I need you to please
show me that you love me.

Who are you?

- Vanessa.
- I'm sorry.

I didn't mean interrupt
you. I just...

Vanessa, what
are you doing here?

I tried to call you, but
you never answer your phone.

V, just please go.
I will call you later.

I know all about
girls like you.

- I shouldn't have come.
- You're in love

with my Jeffrey, aren't you?

- Stop it.
- No.

Vanessa, please go.

Mothers can always
tell these things.

I just came to
return your sweatshirt

that you left at our
house and here, take it.

And to tell you that...

All I wanted was
to know you too.

Vanessa, wait.

Vanessa.

Vanessa.

I'll be damned.

You remember Buzz?

He still takes good care of me.

What the hell
happened to you, kid?

This is why you want
me to stay outside?

Leave him alone.

Leave him alone.

He's sick, okay Buzz.

He's sick.

Come on, obviously
you could use some help.

Don't touch me.

Oh my God.

Oh my God.

God, that son of yours
just broke my nose.

Don't worry about it.

Come on.

Just come on.

Stay away from me.

Buzz, come on. Stop it.

Be quiet.

Where do you think you're going?

I told you what would
happen if you ran away,

you little faggot.

You owe me.

I swear to God,
I'll fucking kill you.

Your mom still
needs you, Jeffy.

I still have a lot of
customers that'd be into you,

pretty little face like yours.

You got yourself all worked up.

You could still make a
good little hooker, I bet.

- Oh God, help me.
- I'm gonna take care of you.

Please get off me.

Please get off.

Oh God, I missed you.

Look what we have here.

You better look out, kid.

Mom.

Eric.

Eric.

Eric.

Oh my God, man.

I'm so sorry. I'm sorry.

I'm so sorry.

I lost the dog.

I can't find him.

We will find him.

I lost the dog.

I lost the dog.

It's okay, man.

It's okay.

I swear, we'll find him.

Come on, man.

You can't stay in here
like this, come on.

I don't know, you know.

You know I don't know.

But what is to know?

Do you know?

- You know-
- Here you go, hun.

Thanks.

I write poems,
did you know that?

No. Like what?

Roses are red,
violets are blue.

If you needed a kidney,
I'd give one to you.

Funny.

Here, sign me up.
I'll go up there.

Wait, are you serious?

I've never done this before,

but what the hell, right?

Hi. You're
Jeffrey, right?

I don't know. I don't know.

He's not in the apartment.

I looked like five blocks
away from the house.

I can't find him anywhere.

I don't know where he is.

I didn't know who else to call.

Hey, here you go.

Why did you come back here?

Yeah, you maybe
have some rough times,

but you got outta here.

You had a life, man.

I had a lie.

Ed.

Yeah.

This is your old camera.

What would it be doing here?

I thought teaching an art
class to a bunch of people

that didn't have a place
to live was so stupid.

I was just trying to survive.

I'm Ed.

That's my daughter, Vanessa.

I knew it was her.

You're hungry?

Oh, maybe later.

I teach philosophy.
That's my day job.

It's either that or
write fortune cookies.

Wow.

Look at this.

Here. Keep capturing
this monumental moment.

I don't know how to use this.

Experiment. That's
the way to learn.

Always impressed when
I see a photographer

with the bravery to take
a shot up at close range.

No, no, no. Keep it.

- What?
- No, I want you to have it.

I have no idea
why he gave it to me

and I never even thanked him.

I never intended to lie to them.

It's just somewhere
along the way

it was nice not having
a history for a change.

I'm tired.

Jeff.

Jeff.

Hey, wait.

Wait.

Wait.

Jeff, where are you going?

Stop.

Stop.

I've never done this before,

but what the hell, right?

Have you ever wondered
on your daily commute

while you take in the
sights and the smells

of the world around you

through a tempered glass
and air conditioning,

if there's less
to life than this?

Less than your job and your
house, your hot girlfriend,

the sex you're having,

the sex you wish
you were having?

I'm not gonna spew a
courageous story of survival

to restore anyone's
hope in mankind

'cause it doesn't exist.

I'm just a bug in a jar

straining to squeeze my
contorted, splitting flesh

through a nail-poked
hole in the lid.

At night, I still see her
emaciated form pleading.

Her starving body
feeding itself with grief

as she sobs dry tears
over her lifeless baby

stiffening in her arms.

She's locked her eyes to mine

and I desperately
seek some callousness

to force my eyes away,
but everywhere I turn,

she's there and I curse her.

Because the shit I've seen

has burned a hole
so deep inside of me

that everything blurs,

and the only thing
that I can see clearly

is some almighty son of a bitch,

hell bent on making a
sick believer out of me.

I would love to be an atheist,

but when you are sitting there

sucking down on your
peppermint latte,

and she's digging a grave in
the dry dirt for her dead baby,

I simply can't
escape the obvious

that somebody up there is
just fucking with all of us.

Where have you been?

Fuck you.

You have been so thirsty,

but your cries are heard.

Hurry.

Come on.

- Hey.
- Hey.

Here you go.

- Thank you.
- You okay?

Yeah.

You want me to hang around?
I can wait downstairs.

No, you should
be home with Vanna.

I love you.

Eric.

It's okay, hey.

It's me.

It's Ed.

I think this belongs to you.

I'm sorry.

It's okay.

Son,

I don't know why
some people suffer

through drought
longer than others,

but the rain always
comes eventually.

And when it does, the
desperate, barren, thirsty earth

quenches itself in a way
that the lush, green earth

could never imagine
or understand.

And I have to live
in this tension

because that is
where the fire is.

I think he's pooping.

Hey, hey, hey, slow down.

Here's your camera, dad.

Get anything good, buddy?

Yeah, a caterpillar.

Hey, Eric,
you almost done in there?

Yeah, I'll be right there.

Come
on, help mommy out.

Grab us some plates.

Mom, do you want
us to feed him?

No, no,
your brother first.

- Yes.
- No.

- Yes.
- No.

- Yes.
- No.

We caught a caterpillar,

then it pooped, and then
it fell off the leaf

and then we took
tons of pictures.

Really?

Walked down the
path, and we had dad's camera

and we took pictures of
trees and interesting rocks

and a big fish was in the creek.

Oh wow.

Provided by explosiveskull
https://twitter.com/kaboomskull