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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:22,213 --> 00:00:25,913 In breaking news, the asteroid "WE2007" 2 00:00:26,000 --> 00:00:29,458 now appears to have broken up under Jupiter's gravity, making earth impact more likely. 3 00:00:30,000 --> 00:00:31,500 ... 2007 has entered the atmosphere 4 00:00:33,700 --> 00:00:37,900 ... if the asteroid stays it's course, it will make impact with the United Kingdom within 24 hours... 5 00:00:38,000 --> 00:00:40,508 the meteorite is on a collison course for London. 6 00:00:42,500 --> 00:00:46,109 it will hit an area across London... People across London and the Southeast have reported seeing a large meteor 7 00:00:47,500 --> 00:00:49,550 flashing across the sky. 8 00:00:49,600 --> 00:00:52,933 it was this... really bright light, it looked - a meteorite... 9 00:00:53,000 --> 00:00:54,999 but I don't know if you get them around here. 10 00:00:55,000 --> 00:00:57,000 We can now confirm that a meteor has struck, 11 00:00:58,000 --> 00:01:00,342 in Peckham, South London. a meteorite... impact... in the United Kingdom. 12 00:01:00,400 --> 00:01:03,000 specifically in England... London. 13 00:01:03,100 --> 00:01:04,237 specifically, Peckham. 14 00:01:04,563 --> 00:01:07,380 My dog was like, very wide-eyed, you know. 15 00:01:08,213 --> 00:01:11,880 It only ever gets that look when he, when he sees a bitch across the park. 16 00:01:12,005 --> 00:01:16,171 Or a meteorite, I know that now. - A man can be seen in the direct path of the meteor. 17 00:01:16,296 --> 00:01:19,088 A man was hit by a meteor today, as seen... ...extraordinary footage here 18 00:01:19,213 --> 00:01:22,171 A postman, Robert Kenner, has been struck by the meteorite. 19 00:01:22,296 --> 00:01:25,088 Robert Kenner,the man struck by a meteorite, 20 00:01:25,213 --> 00:01:28,338 has apparently disappeared from the hospital he was taken to. 21 00:01:29,130 --> 00:01:33,171 There are increasing number of reports of a flying man seen over Peckham 22 00:01:34,213 --> 00:01:37,796 More witnesses are going forward claiming to have seen a flying man in Peckham. 23 00:01:37,921 --> 00:01:41,338 Who is the flying man? -Bob from the depot, yeah. 24 00:01:41,630 --> 00:01:45,046 the may be a link, between the meteor strike, and the flying postman of Peckham. 25 00:01:45,171 --> 00:01:50,071 He's been getting quicker, on his route, and the two things got all like... 26 00:01:50,200 --> 00:01:51,700 Probably wrong... but I'm not. 27 00:01:51,796 --> 00:01:56,838 Footage emerged today of a man flying through the Shard. -Shit! Sorry! 28 00:01:56,963 --> 00:02:01,588 causing thousands of pounds worth of damage. - We didn't go out looking for Bob, Bob came to us. 29 00:02:01,713 --> 00:02:05,713 He handed himself in... - Hey, Bob! - Hello mate! 30 00:02:05,838 --> 00:02:10,421 He no control over his powers - I see I've broken with these We had to train him up. 31 00:02:10,546 --> 00:02:12,546 Flight Test One. 32 00:02:14,000 --> 00:02:15,000 I don't know how to stop! 33 00:02:16,001 --> 00:02:17,991 the baby's alive! 34 00:02:18,000 --> 00:02:22,600 Test the limits of his abilities. - Bob? Oh God! Oh, Jesus Christ,Oh! 35 00:02:22,630 --> 00:02:26,713 The flying postman from Peckham has been secluded inside the Ministry of defense for the last four months. 36 00:02:26,838 --> 00:02:30,088 Why are you doing that? - just a bit nervous. 37 00:02:30,421 --> 00:02:32,521 and he responded well... 38 00:02:34,338 --> 00:02:38,171 And when we perfected the system, Bob went out into the world. 39 00:02:38,846 --> 00:02:40,871 After months of speculation, 40 00:02:40,996 --> 00:02:46,296 the man who developed superpowers has been unveiled by the British government. And his name... is SuperBob. 41 00:02:46,796 --> 00:02:50,005 I am proud of him, and of the work we do. 42 00:03:00,463 --> 00:03:05,713 SuperBob will be working for the UK government, and the Ministry of Defense. 43 00:03:06,046 --> 00:03:10,421 The world will no longer be the same again. A Superhero... for the real world. 44 00:03:13,421 --> 00:03:16,255 It's funny what we get used to, isn't it? 45 00:03:16,380 --> 00:03:19,755 I mean... He can fly. 46 00:03:27,130 --> 00:03:28,330 SuperBob. 47 00:03:28,400 --> 00:03:29,960 ...name's a bit wank. 48 00:03:29,963 --> 00:03:34,796 It's arrogant, in a way but... looks like it stick him. 49 00:03:44,005 --> 00:03:49,171 Um, could you tell me your, uh... your name, and your... job? Please. 50 00:03:50,921 --> 00:03:53,171 My name is Teresa Maria Ford. 51 00:03:53,963 --> 00:03:58,088 I am the head of the emergency response / disaster unit. 52 00:03:59,380 --> 00:04:01,880 But you can't use any of that. 53 00:04:02,921 --> 00:04:07,088 I can use it? - You can't use any of it, no. - I can't use your name, even? - No. -Okay. 54 00:04:07,921 --> 00:04:13,338 You have - you - a very, very important job, as far as I understand. - Um-hm. 55 00:04:13,921 --> 00:04:18,380 Could you tell us a little bit about what that job involves? 56 00:04:18,505 --> 00:04:20,605 No. 57 00:04:21,713 --> 00:04:26,130 Would it be okay to ask you why you wanted to make this film? 58 00:04:26,255 --> 00:04:30,046 We feel that perhaps the public doesn't know the real Bob. 59 00:04:30,171 --> 00:04:36,046 And I - I just feel it's really our duty to let people know that Bob is 60 00:04:37,505 --> 00:04:40,671 Just a regular guy. Who can fly. 61 00:04:43,213 --> 00:04:48,838 Yes, I have two bills. I've got one from British Gas and one from you and, um 62 00:04:48,963 --> 00:04:53,630 Yes, I'm sure it's my fault I don't mind, it's just I wanted to... 63 00:04:57,588 --> 00:05:01,380 Um... can I call you back in a bit, please? Thank you. 64 00:05:01,505 --> 00:05:05,088 Hello, I'm John, we're making the film today. 65 00:05:05,213 --> 00:05:09,755 Is that today? - Yeah, yeah it's today. Theresa said you knew about it? 66 00:05:14,005 --> 00:05:16,005 Oh, no - Bob... 67 00:05:16,130 --> 00:05:19,180 Hi, I'm Bob, Bob... Can I - can I - ... Good morning. 68 00:05:19,305 --> 00:05:22,130 Just your normal voice is fine here, Bob. No, Bob... 69 00:05:22,255 --> 00:05:25,963 Good morning. - Just... - Good morning! - Just this... - Hey, Hey! - Bob, just wait! 70 00:05:26,088 --> 00:05:28,671 Thanks for having us. - You're welcome! 71 00:05:28,796 --> 00:05:33,255 Hi, I'm Bob. - Hey, Bob. - Hey, Doris. That's Doris, that's my cleaner... 72 00:05:33,380 --> 00:05:35,480 Have you done the sheets yet? 73 00:05:37,005 --> 00:05:40,921 Not yet. - then, can I start in the bathroom, please? 74 00:05:42,255 --> 00:05:44,963 Yep. Makes sense. 75 00:05:45,588 --> 00:05:51,713 'Kay, what is all this? - Um, they're making a film to show that I'm normal. 76 00:05:52,380 --> 00:05:54,480 Oh, good luck! 77 00:05:54,796 --> 00:05:57,088 This way? - Yeah, that's great. 78 00:06:03,130 --> 00:06:05,171 That's the way, right. 79 00:06:05,296 --> 00:06:07,396 Yep. 80 00:06:08,338 --> 00:06:11,838 May I ask you your name, and your job, please? 81 00:06:11,963 --> 00:06:16,588 You may. My name is Bob Kenner and I'm a civil servant. 82 00:06:17,130 --> 00:06:21,421 You don't say superhero? - We don't use that word. 83 00:06:21,630 --> 00:06:24,421 I mean, you can use that word, but, I would... 84 00:06:24,671 --> 00:06:30,255 I mean, it's just a job and I have shifts just like anyone else. 85 00:06:30,630 --> 00:06:34,171 So, just talk me through from, from, You wake up, what happens? 86 00:06:35,963 --> 00:06:41,421 Well, I get up and, I've a massive wee... 87 00:06:42,171 --> 00:06:45,588 A bomb goes off in Afghanistan, Boom! Chaos! 88 00:06:51,000 --> 00:06:55,900 I'm leaving a gap here so if you want to put like, news footage of, you know, like a bomb, or chaos, 89 00:06:55,921 --> 00:06:59,588 or whatever, just to, just to jazz up, I don't want to tell you how to do your job, but 90 00:06:59,713 --> 00:07:02,838 I imagine this is probably just... pretty bleak. 91 00:07:06,800 --> 00:07:08,800 This is an E-179. 92 00:07:11,800 --> 00:07:15,800 This is to set up a temporary No Fly Zone, make sure that nothing bumps into me up there, 93 00:07:15,838 --> 00:07:20,546 which is actually quite important because there is a lot, there's a lot less room up there than you might think. 94 00:07:20,671 --> 00:07:25,463 Like I'm really, I'm really glad to be alive, I'm really glad to have been saved, but he's just a bit... 95 00:07:25,588 --> 00:07:27,688 I mean, sign your own fucking form. 96 00:07:28,000 --> 00:07:30,100 This is a combined insurance. 97 00:07:30,255 --> 00:07:34,880 Eyewitnesses report that Kenner tried to get the baby to sign a form. 98 00:07:35,005 --> 00:07:37,755 He then panicked, and quickly flew off. 99 00:07:38,000 --> 00:07:39,800 Temporary jurisdiction proposal. 100 00:07:40,000 --> 00:07:42,200 We. like. order. 101 00:07:42,421 --> 00:07:44,713 An S12658P. 102 00:07:44,963 --> 00:07:49,255 "I've got to fill out a form." Of course you have to fill out a form! 103 00:07:49,880 --> 00:07:52,005 How is there going to be a record of it? 104 00:07:52,130 --> 00:07:55,046 How would you rate the experience out of ten? 105 00:07:55,171 --> 00:07:58,255 I mean, a solid six, you know. I mean, I didn't die. 106 00:07:59,296 --> 00:08:03,963 There is a lot happening - How stressful do you find your job? 107 00:08:04,088 --> 00:08:07,338 Can I ask you a question? - Sure. 108 00:08:07,546 --> 00:08:12,213 Are you with Eon or British Gas? - Um, why? 109 00:08:13,421 --> 00:08:18,171 Uh, I'm not taking sides or anything but I think I might have signed up to both of them by mistake. 110 00:08:18,296 --> 00:08:20,971 I'm with Southern Electric. 111 00:08:21,096 --> 00:08:25,080 Damnit. They came round last week, I said I didn't have time. 112 00:08:25,205 --> 00:08:28,546 Are they good? - Seem to be. - Damn it! 113 00:08:28,671 --> 00:08:32,880 Well, I was really excited to meet him, because, you know, he can fly, for starters, 114 00:08:33,005 --> 00:08:38,255 Which is brilliant, But take that away, and really, he's just a bit of a dullard. 115 00:08:38,505 --> 00:08:42,546 And it pains me to say that 'cause all my mates and me thoght he he was fit before I met nim. 116 00:08:42,671 --> 00:08:46,421 So I think the question that everybody wants to know is... 117 00:08:47,088 --> 00:08:49,630 Does SuperBob have a girlfriend? 118 00:08:51,796 --> 00:08:54,838 No, SuperBob does not have a girlfriend. 119 00:08:55,755 --> 00:09:01,255 Why is that? - Because SuperBob is very busy. 120 00:09:05,755 --> 00:09:07,855 This is Peckham. 121 00:09:08,630 --> 00:09:11,213 Not the Ritz, but it's home. 122 00:09:12,296 --> 00:09:17,588 People say it's a bt stabby, but it's not actually. It's a bit, but it's not a lot. 123 00:09:17,713 --> 00:09:20,921 The named this one after me.It's sweet, really. 124 00:09:21,421 --> 00:09:23,521 Hello, mate. 125 00:09:25,088 --> 00:09:27,455 Yo, air support. - Yeah... 126 00:09:27,580 --> 00:09:29,930 That's the "Sun Do, Sun Don't". I call it that.. 127 00:09:30,055 --> 00:09:33,338 Full name is "Sun Do, Sun Don't, Sun Don't Mind if you Do At All". 128 00:09:33,463 --> 00:09:35,563 Just my little thing. 129 00:09:35,880 --> 00:09:39,296 I mean I grew up in Peckham, these are my ends. 130 00:09:40,296 --> 00:09:44,046 Everyone's friendly. - SuperPrick! 131 00:09:45,130 --> 00:09:48,380 Except for Daren. From his state. 132 00:09:49,296 --> 00:09:51,505 Not a fan. 133 00:09:52,546 --> 00:09:55,463 Almost definitely not his bike. 134 00:10:01,130 --> 00:10:06,505 This is my favorite thing to do. I only really get to do it on my day off. 135 00:10:29,700 --> 00:10:33,325 I mean it's... You know, it's, it's an honor to have him. 136 00:10:34,505 --> 00:10:36,605 Yeah. 137 00:10:45,421 --> 00:10:48,380 That was amazing! That was such a good one! 138 00:10:48,505 --> 00:10:51,880 They were so good they said we could finish early. That was amazing! 139 00:10:52,005 --> 00:10:54,630 It's just so good to feel part of the community. 140 00:10:54,755 --> 00:10:58,255 It's the Peckham people. You know what I mean? It's just... 141 00:11:07,046 --> 00:11:12,046 Sometimes I like to stay in on my day off as well. Work on my projects. 142 00:11:14,463 --> 00:11:20,463 This one is for someone... Special. 143 00:11:24,380 --> 00:11:26,630 Hello? - David? 144 00:11:26,755 --> 00:11:28,963 It's Bob, you called me. 145 00:11:29,088 --> 00:11:32,088 Who is Bob? - Bob, your son. 146 00:11:32,213 --> 00:11:35,046 You called me, Mum. - I don't have a son. 147 00:11:35,171 --> 00:11:38,213 If I had a son, he would come and visit me more. 148 00:11:38,630 --> 00:11:44,671 I'm not suggesting that she's faking it, but I do sometimes think that it's quite a convenient disease. 149 00:11:44,796 --> 00:11:47,713 I heard that, Bob. - Oh, now you remember my name. 150 00:11:47,963 --> 00:11:51,838 So are there any downsides to your amazing life, Bob? 151 00:11:55,088 --> 00:12:01,296 It does get... lonely. Sometimes. 152 00:12:12,713 --> 00:12:15,421 He struggles, 'cause he's got big fingers. 153 00:12:16,088 --> 00:12:19,713 Sorry, who's that? - Oh that's Barry, my security. - You have security? 154 00:12:19,838 --> 00:12:24,630 Yeah. It's a union thing, he has to watch over the house. He's got a shed. 155 00:12:25,046 --> 00:12:28,296 That seems... unnecessary. - Why? 156 00:12:29,088 --> 00:12:33,421 Because you're invulnerable. -Well, it's a union thing. 157 00:12:35,571 --> 00:12:39,130 You were saying? He's got this thyroid problem that affects him... - No, um no... 158 00:12:39,255 --> 00:12:41,355 About being lonely. 159 00:12:43,921 --> 00:12:46,021 Oh, um, right. 160 00:12:47,421 --> 00:12:51,838 I guess, I have always wanted someone.... 161 00:12:54,963 --> 00:12:57,338 To shine my shoes with. 162 00:12:58,963 --> 00:13:01,063 I never had that. 163 00:13:02,380 --> 00:13:07,130 But today... today, I am making changes. 164 00:13:08,755 --> 00:13:12,380 Because today, I have a date. 165 00:13:14,505 --> 00:13:16,671 That's great! - Yeah. 166 00:13:17,213 --> 00:13:20,546 When were you last on a date? - Six years ago. 167 00:13:20,671 --> 00:13:24,338 Doris, I trying to do an interview! Sorry. 168 00:13:28,363 --> 00:13:30,371 So, who's the date with? 169 00:13:33,213 --> 00:13:37,421 June is... The most beautiful girl in Peckham. 170 00:13:37,546 --> 00:13:40,838 Can I say that? I said it, it's true. 171 00:13:42,171 --> 00:13:47,296 She's the most beautiful girl in the world, and I've been all over. 172 00:13:47,630 --> 00:13:51,797 I remember the very first conversation we ever had, like it was yesterday. 173 00:13:52,380 --> 00:13:57,130 She says to me, "Have you ever read House of Leaves?" And I'm like, "No." 174 00:13:57,255 --> 00:14:01,338 And she's like, "Well, you should." So I did. 175 00:14:03,255 --> 00:14:05,355 That's where she works. 176 00:14:07,088 --> 00:14:10,713 Anyway, I didn't get it. It's like this book, you have to sort of turn it around as you read it, 177 00:14:10,838 --> 00:14:14,505 It's like this sort of spiraling... I didn't get it. 178 00:14:14,630 --> 00:14:18,005 But it was an icebreaker, because then... 179 00:14:19,796 --> 00:14:23,130 Is that her? - I don't know which one she is. - She's the most beautiful one. Oh, I... 180 00:14:23,255 --> 00:14:26,046 Go go go go go, I'm going to look like a right wheeler... 181 00:14:26,171 --> 00:14:28,171 He's been coming in, for about six months. 182 00:14:28,296 --> 00:14:31,463 He comes in every Tuesday I know because I've been counting. 183 00:14:31,588 --> 00:14:35,588 Because it's... Well, you know. Him. In here. 184 00:14:37,380 --> 00:14:41,921 Everyone else is used to it, but... I guess I'm just not.. 185 00:14:44,796 --> 00:14:48,546 This is where I used to work.I used to love working here, because people are always excited.... 186 00:14:48,671 --> 00:14:52,255 Oh! Bob, come here! - They'd be excited to get... 187 00:14:52,380 --> 00:14:55,963 Bob, one second, just come here and... - I don't know who she is. 188 00:14:56,338 --> 00:14:58,921 Bob. Come here. 189 00:14:59,888 --> 00:15:02,421 You must listen to big people when when they talk and talk to you. 190 00:15:02,546 --> 00:15:05,005 Hold this for me, I'll soon come. I'm gonna go on to the butcher's. 191 00:15:05,130 --> 00:15:08,630 I'm just going to the butcher's before it close. Please, just hold it, yes indeedy 192 00:15:08,755 --> 00:15:11,005 Just hold it, I'll soon come, Okay. 193 00:15:13,671 --> 00:15:16,046 Well, he's just not like other guys. 194 00:15:16,171 --> 00:15:19,463 I mean... He's really not. 195 00:15:21,005 --> 00:15:24,713 Like, every week I was taking out books and bringing them back. 196 00:15:24,838 --> 00:15:28,380 Oh, he is a voracious reader. - I was not reading any of them. 197 00:15:28,505 --> 00:15:33,172 He's read my favorite book, which is very romantic. 198 00:15:33,338 --> 00:15:37,838 Because it's not an easy book. - And then, after about six months... 199 00:15:37,963 --> 00:15:44,005 He started like, hanging around my desk a lot... - Just like, mumbling about, around her like an idiot. 200 00:15:44,130 --> 00:15:47,630 I thought, "Does he like me?" 201 00:15:47,880 --> 00:15:53,505 Eventually... - Would SuperBob ever ask me out? 202 00:15:54,005 --> 00:15:56,963 Finally... - Like, ever? 203 00:15:57,088 --> 00:15:59,671 She asked me out.. 204 00:15:59,796 --> 00:16:01,896 And he said yes. 205 00:16:02,588 --> 00:16:04,596 It was unbelievable. 206 00:16:04,721 --> 00:16:08,921 So, finally, we're going on our date. Today. 207 00:16:10,213 --> 00:16:12,630 Lunch. One o'clock. 208 00:16:13,463 --> 00:16:15,713 And I am very excited about it. 209 00:16:15,921 --> 00:16:18,213 There is no accounting for tastes. 210 00:16:22,338 --> 00:16:27,171 I do actually need Maureen, because I don't have a photo ID, so... 211 00:16:27,296 --> 00:16:29,396 I am done. 212 00:16:34,421 --> 00:16:38,754 It's Theresa. She wants to take me shopping for clothes for the date. 213 00:16:39,338 --> 00:16:42,630 I don't need her for that. I can buy clothes. 214 00:16:44,213 --> 00:16:46,213 How hard is it to buy clothes? 215 00:16:46,338 --> 00:16:51,588 Doris, I need you to help me buy clothes, I've made a terrible mistake. You need to take me shopping. 216 00:16:51,721 --> 00:16:56,421 I don't want to turn up at this date... - You're like a pedophile. - Is that what this combo says to you? 217 00:16:56,546 --> 00:17:00,046 It's not just the clothes, it's the face. - Okay, well that's terrible, I need clothes... 218 00:17:00,171 --> 00:17:02,838 You look like a man who has not touched a woman in six years. 219 00:17:02,963 --> 00:17:05,805 I need clothes where I turn up and I don't look like a weirdo. 220 00:17:05,930 --> 00:17:09,980 You look desperate, and insane... - You look like a terrorist. - Hello, Barry. - That's because of his eyebrows. 221 00:17:10,105 --> 00:17:13,255 What is wrong with eyebrows? -Terroristic. - You have terrorist eyebrows. 222 00:17:13,380 --> 00:17:16,338 I will buy you something. - Anything? 223 00:17:17,463 --> 00:17:20,380 Yep. What do you need? - Socks. 224 00:17:20,505 --> 00:17:23,463 Let's go. You stay here. Just Doris. 225 00:17:24,963 --> 00:17:28,380 Alright, I'll stay, it's alright. I'll have a bath or something. 226 00:17:30,796 --> 00:17:36,046 We'll walk one to the other and see everything. In... two minutes. 227 00:17:36,171 --> 00:17:41,838 Hey! Umm... - Oh, Karl! - Why don't you call me anymore? - 'Cause... we had our fun. 228 00:17:41,963 --> 00:17:46,630 But I want more fun! - We had our fun! Come on, Bob. 229 00:17:46,755 --> 00:17:50,255 Enjoying your day off, SuperBob? - Oh, yes, thanks! 230 00:17:50,380 --> 00:17:52,546 You lazy shit! 231 00:17:53,130 --> 00:17:55,463 Do not listen to her. - I didn't. 232 00:17:56,880 --> 00:18:01,380 I thought you were still with Javier. - Yes? Oh, Javier was over weeks ago. 233 00:18:01,505 --> 00:18:06,946 I'm so hungry. You like lemon? - I'm okay with lemons, is that what you want to eat it? - No. 234 00:18:07,071 --> 00:18:09,130 What is this? - A pa pa. 235 00:18:09,255 --> 00:18:14,088 A pa pa? - What do you want to eat? I don't know what it is. I always have... Curiosity, what is it? 236 00:18:14,213 --> 00:18:17,963 Is it meat? Is it cold, is it hot? 237 00:18:39,088 --> 00:18:41,921 What was wrong with Javier? 238 00:18:43,171 --> 00:18:45,505 He always took me bowling. 239 00:18:45,630 --> 00:18:47,880 You hate bowling. - I know. 240 00:18:50,963 --> 00:18:54,213 I'm Bob's cleaner. I clean twice a week. 241 00:18:54,338 --> 00:18:57,713 I also work at the care home where his mother lives. 242 00:18:57,838 --> 00:19:02,963 I became very friendly with Mrs. Kenner. And she tells me her son needs help. 243 00:19:03,088 --> 00:19:05,421 He cannot tie his own shoelaces. 244 00:19:05,546 --> 00:19:09,046 And... that is how I was stuck with Bob. 245 00:19:09,921 --> 00:19:14,171 Yeah. What, you're "Eon"? I thought I'd already spoken to you this... 246 00:19:14,296 --> 00:19:17,713 Is that "British Gas"? Do you like this? - No. 247 00:19:17,838 --> 00:19:23,546 the, the thing is... - I came here to raise money to pay for a nursery in Colombia. 248 00:19:24,755 --> 00:19:29,838 It's taken me... six years, and I have barely raised any money. 249 00:19:31,338 --> 00:19:34,921 They not pay shit in this country. - I heard that. 250 00:19:35,255 --> 00:19:37,796 I found this really beautiful monastery in Tibet. 251 00:19:37,921 --> 00:19:40,796 I'm gonna fly us there, I'm gonna sit on this clifftop, 252 00:19:40,921 --> 00:19:45,630 We overlook the whole of the place, we eat noodles... Why are you laughing? - Are you joking? 253 00:19:45,755 --> 00:19:51,713 No. - For a first date? -Yes. - Do you want to look crazy? - I definitely don't want to look crazy. 254 00:19:51,838 --> 00:19:55,630 Take her to... take her to the "Kari Kabin" in Peckham. 255 00:19:55,796 --> 00:19:59,671 Really? - Yes, with your legs. Don't be so keen. 256 00:19:59,796 --> 00:20:03,671 It's a nice place. Buy her Tika Masala, ask her lots of questions. - Like what? 257 00:20:03,796 --> 00:20:06,963 Don't ask who supplies her fucking gas. 258 00:20:07,821 --> 00:20:09,930 I wasn't going to. 259 00:20:10,055 --> 00:20:12,130 ... I wasn't going to! 260 00:20:12,255 --> 00:20:14,338 Ask her something personal. 261 00:20:14,463 --> 00:20:17,838 Okay, um... is your mother still alive? - No, something else. 262 00:20:17,963 --> 00:20:21,588 And then, if it goes well, then you can fly her about. 263 00:20:21,713 --> 00:20:26,296 Okay. - Don't play all your cards at once. You'll scare her away. 264 00:20:26,421 --> 00:20:32,543 It's going to be alright, though, isn't it? I just got to be myself, right? - Not if you want her to like you. 265 00:20:32,668 --> 00:20:35,738 Bob, when you're on this date, turn off your fucking phone. 266 00:20:35,863 --> 00:20:38,896 Women hate being interrupted by fucking phones. - It's Theresa. It's Theresa, I have to take it. 267 00:20:39,021 --> 00:20:43,546 Fuck Theresa! Don't answer! It's your day off... - Hello? Hey, hello Theresa. No, no, no no, I'm listening to angry Spanish talk radio. 268 00:20:43,671 --> 00:20:46,555 I need you to come into the office now. - But... - It's an emergency. 269 00:20:46,680 --> 00:20:49,763 Theresa, it's my day off. - In my office, now, Bob. 270 00:20:49,888 --> 00:20:52,221 Okay, if it's an emergency. - It's a fucking emergency, Bob! 271 00:20:52,346 --> 00:20:55,413 I have to go, I'm sorry. Can you take care of everything? 272 00:20:55,538 --> 00:20:58,230 What about your date? You're just going to cancel because the MOD called? 273 00:20:58,355 --> 00:21:01,413 No, No, I will go quickly to the MOD and then I'll rush to my date. 274 00:21:01,538 --> 00:21:06,421 It will be fine, there'll be enough time. - What if there's not time? - Then, I'll postpone the date. 275 00:21:06,546 --> 00:21:09,380 You are pathetic! - I'm not pathetic, what choice do I have? 276 00:21:09,505 --> 00:21:15,046 What did these people do before you, Bob? Sometimes we have to say "No"! - I can't say "No" to the Ministry of Defence! 277 00:21:15,171 --> 00:21:19,005 It's not so hard to say "No". - It's very hard to say... - "No. Theresa, no, it's my day off." 278 00:21:19,130 --> 00:21:21,796 This from a woman who has never said No in her entire life! 279 00:21:21,921 --> 00:21:26,338 "Oh, yes, Javier, yes, Karl, yes, Simon, yes, Brian. 280 00:21:26,505 --> 00:21:29,880 I literally don't know the meaning of the word 'No!" " 281 00:21:32,130 --> 00:21:37,463 What did you say? - It was a... doesn't matter, it was just a joke. 282 00:21:37,630 --> 00:21:40,505 What, you think a woman is not allowed to have many partners? 283 00:21:40,630 --> 00:21:43,838 No, of course I don't think that. -You think it makes her a whore, do you? 284 00:21:43,963 --> 00:21:48,546 A woman living her life, choosing what she wants to... - I don't think all women are whores. 285 00:21:48,671 --> 00:21:52,463 just you! I can't believe that was the end of that sentence. 286 00:21:52,588 --> 00:21:55,963 I really thought there would be other words, which would make it sound better, 287 00:21:56,088 --> 00:22:02,421 Can I get anything? - I'd take your losses, mate. -Yeah, I have to go. I... 288 00:22:02,713 --> 00:22:06,588 Wait, I have a form for you. It says... to go fuck yourself. 289 00:22:08,296 --> 00:22:11,796 It's blank. - It says, "Go fuck yourself." Please sign it. 290 00:22:11,921 --> 00:22:14,880 It doesn't say anything. - It's psychic paper. 291 00:22:18,630 --> 00:22:20,730 Full name, please. 292 00:22:22,380 --> 00:22:24,480 Can I please go now? 293 00:22:25,630 --> 00:22:27,963 Go. Do your fucking thing. 294 00:22:33,805 --> 00:22:37,088 What's the emergency? -The American situation is frying. 295 00:22:37,213 --> 00:22:40,713 Where do I need to be? - Here, for a handshake. - Is that code? 296 00:22:40,838 --> 00:22:43,088 No, it's a handshake. - Right. 297 00:22:43,213 --> 00:22:47,171 The senator is joining us for lunch, you need you here for a Photo Op. 298 00:22:47,296 --> 00:22:52,838 Just a handshake, nothing heavy. Just a Handshake. And a hug. And hold a baby. 299 00:22:52,963 --> 00:22:56,880 We've got a few scenarios that they've agreed to. Um, the classic handhshake... 300 00:22:57,005 --> 00:23:00,088 Hang on, what is this? - I need to show you're not dangerous. 301 00:23:00,213 --> 00:23:02,655 I'm not dangerous. - I know that. - I've never hurt anyone. 302 00:23:02,780 --> 00:23:07,130 We know you're not dangerous, Bob, but this is the United States, they still haven't forgiven us. - For what? - For you. 303 00:23:07,255 --> 00:23:09,296 They're still pissed off you're ours. 304 00:23:09,421 --> 00:23:12,005 I'm going to tell you this off the record. 305 00:23:13,088 --> 00:23:15,188 Off the record, okay? 306 00:23:17,005 --> 00:23:20,796 About a year ago, America made a move on Bob. 307 00:23:21,463 --> 00:23:24,046 They tried to poach him, but we wouldn't let him go. 308 00:23:24,171 --> 00:23:30,505 And ever since then, a smear campaign started, from across the Pond. 309 00:23:31,005 --> 00:23:33,105 Infecting everything. 310 00:23:34,046 --> 00:23:36,146 Coincidence? 311 00:23:37,046 --> 00:23:39,146 You do the math. 312 00:23:39,880 --> 00:23:43,838 In Texas today SuperBob saved 400 children from a burning school. 313 00:23:43,963 --> 00:23:47,963 There were no injuries. - They send him into a burning school to save the children. 314 00:23:48,088 --> 00:23:51,380 Now I'm not disagreeing that he saved the children, he did save the children, that's by the by. 315 00:23:51,505 --> 00:23:56,546 But what kind of "Superhero" smashes up a school? A school? 316 00:23:59,921 --> 00:24:04,671 Now, this is one of their favorites. It's you, kneeling, obviously. 317 00:24:05,505 --> 00:24:11,630 With a gigantic American flag, like, flapping behind you. 318 00:24:12,338 --> 00:24:16,255 Does it have to be today? - Yes, they're all here for tonight's summit. 319 00:24:16,380 --> 00:24:21,005 It's my day off. - Do you think I like calling you in on your day off? Because I don't. 320 00:24:21,130 --> 00:24:25,088 Okay, it makes me feel awfull, but unfortunately, that is part of my job. 321 00:24:25,213 --> 00:24:27,421 Now this deal has taken a long time to broker. 322 00:24:27,546 --> 00:24:32,171 Yeah, these mountains are not currently snowcapped. Now these are not condors, they are not vultures, 323 00:24:32,296 --> 00:24:36,338 Don't make the same mistake I did, they are bald eagles. 324 00:24:36,463 --> 00:24:41,546 Um, their handler is a lovely man named Clint... - What about my date? - What? 325 00:24:42,046 --> 00:24:44,146 My date. 326 00:24:45,463 --> 00:24:51,213 Oh, Bob. She'll wait. - They're no danger to Bob, in any way. 327 00:24:51,421 --> 00:24:54,463 Postpone the date. She'll be fine. 328 00:24:55,046 --> 00:25:02,130 We will however have like, a few carcases, sort of scattered around the rocks, 329 00:25:02,255 --> 00:25:05,463 to get them interested, to get them excited, to get them swooshing. 330 00:25:07,838 --> 00:25:09,938 If they do go for Bob... 331 00:25:10,713 --> 00:25:12,813 What if I don't want to? 332 00:25:13,546 --> 00:25:15,646 What do you mean? 333 00:25:16,505 --> 00:25:20,130 Could I say no? - Could you say... 334 00:25:21,755 --> 00:25:26,921 Bob. No. - Doris says I should say "No" more... 335 00:25:27,046 --> 00:25:30,130 What the fuck does Doris have to do with world security? 336 00:25:30,255 --> 00:25:33,088 She's my cleaner. - I know who she is. 337 00:25:36,255 --> 00:25:41,463 And finally... the hot dog. - Yeah, I like that. 338 00:25:41,588 --> 00:25:44,213 Okay, I'll do the handshake one. 339 00:25:46,296 --> 00:25:52,005 Next Tuesday, I promise. I promise. It's just... my work... 340 00:25:54,838 --> 00:25:59,296 You're being a lot more understanding than I expected, I actually thought you'd be angrier. 341 00:25:59,963 --> 00:26:03,505 It's just... I have to do it. Apparently. 342 00:26:05,921 --> 00:26:09,046 No, I can't keep messing you around, it's not all, it's not alright, 343 00:26:09,171 --> 00:26:12,171 It's not alright. It isn't alright. 344 00:26:13,296 --> 00:26:18,171 Do you know what, June? We're going to have this date. 345 00:26:25,838 --> 00:26:30,213 Hello, June? No, we didn't get cut off, I hung up. 346 00:26:30,338 --> 00:26:32,921 No, no, no, you hadn't done anything wrong. 347 00:26:33,046 --> 00:26:36,588 No, I should have said goodby. I should have said goodby, I was being dramatic. 348 00:26:36,713 --> 00:26:38,880 I was being dramatic, it was stupid. I should've... 349 00:26:39,005 --> 00:26:42,296 I should've said goodby, But I thought I'd hang up, and then I'd go and do... 350 00:26:42,421 --> 00:26:45,505 And then to go and do something, and then maybe, maybe I could see you. 351 00:26:45,630 --> 00:26:48,338 Okay, you go when I... Okay, Bye! 352 00:26:48,463 --> 00:26:52,380 Okay. No, it doesn't matter.Okay. Bye! Okay. Um... Uh. 353 00:26:53,296 --> 00:26:55,588 I'm not really wild about.... 354 00:26:57,463 --> 00:27:01,421 I'm not doing it. - Oh, Bob. Okay... - No. I'm saying No. 355 00:27:01,546 --> 00:27:04,946 Listen to me, Bob. She will wait. -You heard me. - I told you, I promise you she will... 356 00:27:05,000 --> 00:27:09,000 Fucking, NO! 357 00:27:12,296 --> 00:27:17,421 I'm sorry I had to swear word with that, that was unnecessary, I'm very excited, but... 358 00:27:17,546 --> 00:27:20,755 Right, you don't know what you're doing. Stop making a scene! 359 00:27:20,880 --> 00:27:25,255 Doris, I did it! I said "No". Yeah, it's Bob. Yeah. 360 00:27:25,921 --> 00:27:30,171 I'm going to take her to the "Kari Kabin" and I'm going to ask her lots of questions. 361 00:27:35,880 --> 00:27:41,047 Yes, sorry Doris. I hung up again, I should've said goodby... 362 00:28:10,221 --> 00:28:13,821 Bob, you need to come! - How did you find me? - I told you to come here! Why is your phone off? 363 00:28:13,946 --> 00:28:16,946 You told me to turn my phone off! - Why are you shouting at me? 364 00:28:17,000 --> 00:28:19,583 Your mother fell. She hurt herself. 365 00:28:31,380 --> 00:28:33,880 Ooh! What's that? 366 00:28:35,338 --> 00:28:41,588 You banged your head, Mum. - Did I? That was silly of me. - Yeah, it was. 367 00:28:42,546 --> 00:28:44,646 Hi, Doris. - Hi. 368 00:28:45,421 --> 00:28:49,005 It's been too long. - Javier... 369 00:28:49,130 --> 00:28:54,130 I haven't shown you all my moves. - I've seen enough of your moves. 370 00:29:01,171 --> 00:29:03,255 You know what would make me happy, don't you? 371 00:29:03,380 --> 00:29:06,130 What's that, Mum? - To see you with a nice girl. 372 00:29:06,255 --> 00:29:10,546 That's all I want. To see you with a nice girl. - I know that's "all" you want. 373 00:29:10,671 --> 00:29:14,630 Then why won't you give it to me? - Mum... - I'll die sooner than you think. 374 00:29:14,755 --> 00:29:18,421 Mum, why do you always say that? - I could die today. 375 00:29:18,546 --> 00:29:22,713 You know, it's horrible when you say that! I really hate it. - Bob, if you don't like touching women... 376 00:29:22,838 --> 00:29:27,255 Oh, come on! I touch women. I touch women all the time with my hands! 377 00:29:30,796 --> 00:29:32,896 Only when they ask. 378 00:29:34,088 --> 00:29:36,188 And when do them ask? 379 00:29:36,463 --> 00:29:38,563 They don't. ... Um hmm. 380 00:29:39,213 --> 00:29:43,013 ... naked and proud in front of her, and I would say, "Doris..." 381 00:29:44,000 --> 00:29:47,000 Javier. - Bob. 382 00:29:48,000 --> 00:29:52,000 What are you doing? Mum, put that away! - If you're never going to be with a woman, then I may as well be dead! 383 00:29:52,096 --> 00:29:54,996 Mum, stop threatening to die! This is exhausting! 384 00:29:55,130 --> 00:29:57,671 I do not want you to die. Give me those pills, this is awful! 385 00:29:59,000 --> 00:30:01,900 - If you would just be with a girl... - I'm with a girl! I'm with a girl! I'm with a girl! 386 00:30:02,000 --> 00:30:04,800 Really? - Yes, I promise. I'm with a girl. I'm with a girl, And she's great,and you'd love her. 387 00:30:05,000 --> 00:30:11,800 Who is she? - she's um... it's um... Doris! It's Doris. - Yes? - Oh, Good! I love Doris! 388 00:30:12,000 --> 00:30:14,900 Okay then it's not Doris. - It's Doris! -What? 389 00:30:15,000 --> 00:30:17,000 My favorite girl in the world! - Okay, wait... 390 00:30:17,171 --> 00:30:19,630 Why is she crying? - Bob just told me the truth! 391 00:30:19,755 --> 00:30:23,213 What did you tell her? - I told her something... Wait. 392 00:30:23,338 --> 00:30:26,338 I always wanted you to be with my Bob. - I didn't know she would say this... 393 00:30:26,463 --> 00:30:29,455 I knew it would come this day. -Doris, please... 394 00:30:29,580 --> 00:30:33,671 I both love you so much. - You've made me the happiest woman. 395 00:30:33,796 --> 00:30:38,671 Could I have a quick word? Just a quick word, Doris. - Yes, Mrs. Kenner. -Doris... 396 00:30:39,630 --> 00:30:43,955 No, I don't want to do it! - It's not bad. - It's bad, I don't want to lie. 397 00:30:44,080 --> 00:30:47,080 How would she ever believe her only son with such a whore? - Doris, 398 00:30:47,205 --> 00:30:52,088 She will find out! Why would I do this? - Because I've never seen her that happy. 399 00:30:52,213 --> 00:30:56,505 Ever. And she will forget, in an... hour. 400 00:30:59,213 --> 00:31:01,380 So why can't we just make her happy? 401 00:31:01,921 --> 00:31:04,021 Just for a moment. 402 00:31:09,880 --> 00:31:11,980 Come on then! 403 00:31:20,713 --> 00:31:23,713 My Bobby and Doris are a couple. 404 00:31:26,630 --> 00:31:28,796 A la? People? 405 00:31:31,255 --> 00:31:40,255 Ladies and gentlemen, Sorry to interrupt, but we are of course here to celebrate the 60th anniversary of Gladis and Ted. 406 00:31:41,000 --> 00:31:43,100 Well done, you two! 407 00:31:47,000 --> 00:31:49,291 Now, as a special treat, 408 00:31:50,000 --> 00:31:55,000 Doris, our Doris has said that her new boyfriend SuperBob... 409 00:31:55,500 --> 00:32:00,500 No, me no believe it... is gonna give a little speech. 410 00:32:01,000 --> 00:32:04,000 Bobby. - No, no, no, why woiuld you do that? 411 00:32:22,500 --> 00:32:25,500 Hiya. 412 00:32:31,000 --> 00:32:33,100 Gladys and... 413 00:32:36,000 --> 00:32:38,583 Ted. 414 00:32:39,000 --> 00:32:42,917 You guys... I've seen you guys over the last few years 415 00:32:44,255 --> 00:32:48,588 There you are! There you are, and you look well 416 00:32:50,130 --> 00:32:56,796 Sixty years. That is a fucking long time. I'm sorry, I don't know why I'm swearing, 417 00:32:56,921 --> 00:33:00,713 That's twice today, that is very out of character. I apologize. 418 00:33:00,838 --> 00:33:06,380 You're the sort of couple... that are going to die... 419 00:33:07,621 --> 00:33:09,671 Very soon. 420 00:33:09,796 --> 00:33:12,046 After each other, after each other, 421 00:33:12,171 --> 00:33:17,755 But not like from cancer, or because, like, you caught something off the other one, 422 00:33:17,880 --> 00:33:22,213 but because, like, as soon as one of you dies, the other one will be like, 423 00:33:23,505 --> 00:33:26,796 Ahh, ahh,My heart, I can't, ... being crushed, I just... 424 00:33:26,921 --> 00:33:30,880 I've just, gone, sort of immed- within a week. 425 00:33:33,838 --> 00:33:36,713 A mean, that's what we want, isn't it? 426 00:33:37,005 --> 00:33:39,671 Not for you to be dead, not in any way, 427 00:33:39,796 --> 00:33:42,255 I mean, if your in pain, please, go ahead, you know... 428 00:33:42,380 --> 00:33:47,046 we'll be, we'll cope, but we'll miss you, the point is, you should stay, let's... 429 00:33:49,296 --> 00:33:51,713 That's what we all want, isn't it? 430 00:33:51,838 --> 00:33:56,046 To be with someone who, when they die, you're like, 431 00:33:57,296 --> 00:34:00,338 "Well, that's it for me, too." 432 00:34:05,963 --> 00:34:12,005 Anyway, Happy Love Day! and, and well done on 60 years 433 00:34:12,138 --> 00:34:15,905 And you weren't married at birth, so you must be... old, so chin up! 434 00:34:16,030 --> 00:34:20,280 And thank you, for the music, Cheers! and, good night. 435 00:34:23,630 --> 00:34:25,930 - Awful! - I hate you. 436 00:34:26,000 --> 00:34:29,416 Very deep. - Oh, when are you gonna stop punishing me? 437 00:34:29,671 --> 00:34:32,588 I haven't decided yet. -Thank you, Bob. 438 00:34:32,713 --> 00:34:36,630 Now, I'm joined in the studio today by the American Senator Bill Jackson. 439 00:34:36,755 --> 00:34:40,338 Senator, you're in town for today's weapon summit. 440 00:34:40,463 --> 00:34:43,505 What exactly is it that you're hoping to achieve here in the UK, senator? 441 00:34:43,630 --> 00:34:47,096 I want to out an end to Britain's monopoly on a highly dangerous weapon. 442 00:34:47,221 --> 00:34:50,588 Ah, but SuperBob isn't in fact a weapon, is he? He's a man. 443 00:34:50,713 --> 00:34:53,921 The fact that he refused to meet with me today, 444 00:34:54,046 --> 00:34:58,463 to shake my hand, with no apology, or explanation, 445 00:34:58,630 --> 00:35:02,588 SuperBob is a weapon that Britain has no control over. 446 00:35:02,713 --> 00:35:04,813 Where is he today? 447 00:35:21,921 --> 00:35:24,021 I don't like dancing. 448 00:35:24,963 --> 00:35:27,213 No, I don't have to... - dance with your girlfiend! 449 00:35:27,338 --> 00:35:31,338 No, that's why we're a good couple, She knows I don't dance. 450 00:35:34,963 --> 00:35:37,671 Is this... this is dancing, isn't it? 451 00:35:38,463 --> 00:35:41,588 No, come on. This is less embarrassing. 452 00:36:00,671 --> 00:36:03,563 Is it weird with Javier? - Why? 453 00:36:03,688 --> 00:36:05,755 Because you use to go out. 454 00:36:05,880 --> 00:36:10,963 Why would it be weird? It was months ago, it was just fun. 455 00:36:11,796 --> 00:36:13,921 You're probably disgusted. 456 00:36:15,088 --> 00:36:18,338 I am sorry. About what I said earlier. 457 00:36:18,671 --> 00:36:21,171 It's OK, you're not normal. 458 00:36:21,546 --> 00:36:27,130 I'm just jealous. Maybe I wish I could be more like you. 459 00:36:27,588 --> 00:36:29,688 You already apologized. 460 00:36:30,713 --> 00:36:33,463 What's this? - It's the psychic paper. 461 00:36:33,630 --> 00:36:36,046 Oh, the psychic paper, is it? 462 00:36:36,246 --> 00:36:40,446 "Doris is better than I will ever be. I am sorry I was ever rude to her, 463 00:36:40,571 --> 00:36:43,463 She's the greatest, I am an idiot, Bob Kenner." 464 00:36:43,588 --> 00:36:45,671 That's interesting. 465 00:36:45,796 --> 00:36:50,046 Yeah. How come your English is so much better on paper? 466 00:38:29,255 --> 00:38:32,505 It's June. I should take this. 467 00:38:32,838 --> 00:38:35,380 Tell her you dance like a fucking idiot. 468 00:38:35,505 --> 00:38:37,963 Hello? June... 469 00:38:43,338 --> 00:38:48,421 No, I honestly, I waited for ages, then I had to go because my Mum, and... 470 00:38:48,546 --> 00:38:50,646 So it was broken? 471 00:38:51,005 --> 00:38:54,630 Well, of course. Of course I'm still keen, 472 00:38:55,005 --> 00:38:57,630 I'm too keen, I'm... 473 00:38:59,255 --> 00:39:02,588 I've been making you something. It's embarrasing. 474 00:39:04,421 --> 00:39:08,088 Yeah, you could see it, if you want. It's at my house. 475 00:39:11,213 --> 00:39:16,421 Yes. Yeah. Yeah, that would be great. 476 00:39:16,921 --> 00:39:19,021 That's a great idea. 477 00:39:19,921 --> 00:39:22,505 Okay, you come to my house. For dinner. 478 00:39:24,546 --> 00:39:27,130 All right. I'm a tremendous cook. 479 00:39:27,963 --> 00:39:33,046 Okay. see you later. All right. Goodbye. 480 00:39:42,796 --> 00:39:44,921 We are joined now by Theresa Ford 481 00:39:45,046 --> 00:39:48,846 Head of the Global Emergency Response Department at the Ministry of Defense. 482 00:39:48,971 --> 00:39:53,255 Theresa, do you really thing that SuperBob - - Excuse me, why won't SuperBob shake my hand? 483 00:39:53,380 --> 00:39:55,546 Does he hold a grudge against the United States? 484 00:39:55,671 --> 00:39:59,338 SuperBob does not hold any resentment against anyone. 485 00:39:59,463 --> 00:40:01,755 He is a very warm and kind man. 486 00:40:01,880 --> 00:40:06,546 You have no control over SuperBob. - Of course I do. 487 00:40:06,671 --> 00:40:10,671 All right, where was he today? - He was resting, Senator Jackson, in accordance... 488 00:40:10,796 --> 00:40:17,171 SuperBob hates America. - SuperBob does not hate America, SuperBob loves America. 489 00:40:17,296 --> 00:40:20,046 He loves your country, he loves your culture. 490 00:40:20,338 --> 00:40:23,213 Plinky plonky, country and western, he can't get enough of it. 491 00:40:23,338 --> 00:40:27,546 You know, big shoulder pads. American football. 492 00:40:27,671 --> 00:40:31,255 Men with cagey, head helmut hats. 493 00:40:31,380 --> 00:40:34,880 Peanut butter and jelly. 494 00:40:35,046 --> 00:40:37,713 Yes, my Bob and Doris are now a couple. 495 00:40:38,130 --> 00:40:40,230 I do not believe it. 496 00:40:44,005 --> 00:40:48,296 Why is your Momma going around telling everybody that you are a couple for? You're not her type. 497 00:40:48,421 --> 00:40:54,963 Doris like the strong, assertive, virile type. You know, the Javier type. 498 00:40:58,296 --> 00:41:01,588 Well, maybe I impressed her. 499 00:41:01,963 --> 00:41:04,380 Yes. How did you impress me? 500 00:41:06,713 --> 00:41:08,755 Without being arrogant, 501 00:41:08,880 --> 00:41:11,963 I am a superhero. I mean, that's... 502 00:41:12,088 --> 00:41:15,005 I never think of you as a superhero. - You never think of me as a superhero? 503 00:41:15,130 --> 00:41:18,463 Never. - Okay, well, not that, then. 504 00:41:18,588 --> 00:41:22,505 So... how the two of you get together? 505 00:41:22,713 --> 00:41:27,421 Just the usual. Just... Doris asked me out, and... 506 00:41:27,546 --> 00:41:29,630 I didn't ask you out! You asked me out. 507 00:41:29,755 --> 00:41:35,422 Oh, I don't remember exaclty, it doesn't matter. - It doesn't matter? Oh, come on, Bob, it's romantic. 508 00:41:35,921 --> 00:41:39,713 Bob has been obsessed with me for a long time. - Obsessed is a strong word. 509 00:41:39,838 --> 00:41:41,838 Always watching me around the house. 510 00:41:41,963 --> 00:41:45,821 I'm always waiting for me to pick up something from the floor so he could look at my ass. 511 00:41:45,946 --> 00:41:48,938 I wouldn't... I didn't do that because I'm a feminist. - When I say he likes my ass... 512 00:41:49,063 --> 00:41:51,155 I don't like you ass, I've never looked at it. - You do not like her ass? 513 00:41:51,280 --> 00:41:56,255 Always watching me eat bananas. - Have you seen her eat a banana? She eats bananas with the skin on, 514 00:41:56,380 --> 00:42:00,713 Of course I watch, it's weird. - And then after a few weeks I came in, 515 00:42:00,838 --> 00:42:03,755 and the whole house smells of patchouli oil. Didn't it, Bob? 516 00:42:03,880 --> 00:42:09,463 Yep. - And Bob is standing there in this big, pink, Ong. 517 00:42:09,588 --> 00:42:14,430 Was it one of mine? - What? 'E was like that when he was younger. Always stealing my knickers. 518 00:42:14,555 --> 00:42:18,413 Mum, when are you going to let that go? It was once, and I was four. 519 00:42:18,538 --> 00:42:22,705 It doesn't matter how old you were. You still stole my knickers. - I did not steal you knickers, Mum! 520 00:42:22,830 --> 00:42:26,838 Why would you stole your mother's knickers? - I didn't steal her knickers! - Sounds lke you stole her knickers. 521 00:42:26,963 --> 00:42:31,963 All right! I stole her knickers, Is everyone happy? Can we move on? 522 00:42:32,380 --> 00:42:35,380 Do you feel better now, Bobby? -Yes. 523 00:42:35,880 --> 00:42:39,255 So there we were, in the kitchen, and I said to Doris... 524 00:42:39,380 --> 00:42:42,171 Four words. - Four words. 525 00:42:42,588 --> 00:42:47,130 Four perfect words. - Of course they were perfect, I said... 526 00:42:47,255 --> 00:42:49,355 I said... 527 00:42:50,338 --> 00:42:52,380 "You complete me, Doris." 528 00:42:52,505 --> 00:42:56,796 No,silly, that is from a film! - From a film. I said, - Come on! - I said... - What did you say? 529 00:42:56,921 --> 00:43:00,546 I said, "Nobody puts Baby..." I didn't say that, it sounds a git, 530 00:43:00,671 --> 00:43:05,213 I said, "I love your face. I love your face!" 531 00:43:05,338 --> 00:43:10,296 That is what said. Because it was poignant. - Isn't he adorable? - He's not my type. 532 00:43:25,838 --> 00:43:29,963 We have a major accident with multiple vehicles on the A205 westbound 533 00:43:30,088 --> 00:43:32,188 Answer, please. 534 00:43:37,005 --> 00:43:39,171 multiple vehicles, multiple injured. 535 00:43:39,296 --> 00:43:41,396 I'd better... 536 00:43:52,838 --> 00:43:56,380 Senator Jackson, I have complete control over Bob's movemenst. 537 00:43:56,505 --> 00:43:58,871 You have no - I know where he is, at all times. 538 00:43:58,996 --> 00:44:05,255 I'm terribly sorry to have to interrupt you there, but we're getting reports of a large car crash in South London, 539 00:44:05,380 --> 00:44:09,046 SuperBob is actually reported to be on the scene. Which if true, Theresa, 540 00:44:09,171 --> 00:44:15,088 would be a direct contravention of his UN sanctioned Tuesday day off. Would it not? 541 00:44:15,213 --> 00:44:19,171 Well, it would if, if... - Well, it would, wouldn't it? 542 00:44:19,296 --> 00:44:24,963 This, this is exactly what I am talking about, - I have to go... - He is not allowed to... - Start the bloody chopper! 543 00:44:26,338 --> 00:44:28,755 He is not allowed to work on Tuesdays! 544 00:44:29,380 --> 00:44:33,505 Rogue WMD. We are at their mercy. 545 00:44:37,213 --> 00:44:39,313 Help, please! 546 00:44:40,296 --> 00:44:45,880 She's got a puncture to her left lung. - Get out of here now. This has nothing to do with the MOD. 547 00:44:46,880 --> 00:44:50,896 I can help. - You cannot work on your day off, that is the law. 548 00:44:51,021 --> 00:44:53,921 You have to be seen to be following orders. Bob! 549 00:44:57,963 --> 00:45:01,338 Do not disobey your government. 550 00:45:04,588 --> 00:45:07,505 Do not disobey me, Bob. 551 00:45:08,421 --> 00:45:10,921 Walk. Away. 552 00:45:11,296 --> 00:45:15,213 Help me! Please, help me! - Don't do it, Bob. 553 00:45:41,296 --> 00:45:43,396 It's OK. 554 00:45:44,671 --> 00:45:46,771 It's all right. 555 00:46:48,171 --> 00:46:52,755 He just let that woman die. - He doesn't have psychic powers, Senator. He's just a man. 556 00:46:52,880 --> 00:46:56,046 He is not just a man. 557 00:46:56,171 --> 00:46:59,921 He has these powers and they should be used in the right way. 558 00:47:00,046 --> 00:47:05,088 You people are sitting on the greatest discovery of this century and you are squandering it. 559 00:47:05,630 --> 00:47:12,921 Why is Great Britain allowed an unsanctioined WMD while the rest of us just got to sit around and wait and see what he is gonna snap? 560 00:47:23,000 --> 00:47:25,900 Bob... - Sorry, I forgot my keys. 561 00:47:26,000 --> 00:47:28,958 No, no, that's fine. I was in the area buying lemons. 562 00:47:31,000 --> 00:47:33,150 Listen, I didn't get them, when we were in the care home 563 00:47:33,213 --> 00:47:36,788 Javier got into this big argument with Tomas for waking him up for lunch. 564 00:47:36,913 --> 00:47:39,463 That is because he has his clock fast. 565 00:47:39,588 --> 00:47:42,171 And then when we gave him the food, he said... 566 00:47:42,296 --> 00:47:45,380 He complained about the food, he said he would only eat cake. 567 00:47:45,505 --> 00:47:47,963 But you know this makes him hyperactive. 568 00:47:48,088 --> 00:47:53,880 Do you remember Nora? The one with the harelip? She likes to be the one to put out the cutlery. 569 00:47:54,213 --> 00:47:56,880 And the cutlery wasn't there. 570 00:47:57,713 --> 00:48:03,755 So, Nora went absolutlely insane And Javier was like, 571 00:48:05,171 --> 00:48:07,921 I have always emptied the dishwasher! 572 00:48:08,046 --> 00:48:11,296 There is no reason to believe I would forget to do it this afternoon! 573 00:48:11,421 --> 00:48:15,421 Why? Why today? Explain to me why today I would have forgotten it. 574 00:48:15,588 --> 00:48:17,688 It was really tough today. 575 00:48:22,838 --> 00:48:24,938 Really tough. 576 00:48:52,130 --> 00:48:54,380 It's always tough. 577 00:49:12,130 --> 00:49:14,796 How ya, Barry? - Hi, Barry. 578 00:49:15,005 --> 00:49:17,505 I'll go and have a bath, then. 579 00:49:25,755 --> 00:49:28,880 Who is this? - Shit, it's June. 580 00:49:29,963 --> 00:49:33,005 Why is she here? - She's coming for dinner. 581 00:49:34,505 --> 00:49:36,605 Oh, I see. 582 00:49:38,130 --> 00:49:43,213 Go. - I'm going to... - To your room, go to your room. You have to clean up. 583 00:49:46,646 --> 00:49:50,380 Bari, please get out, I have to shower. - I ain't finished yet. 584 00:49:50,505 --> 00:49:53,255 Can you move up? 585 00:49:58,005 --> 00:50:00,255 Good evening, June. - Hey. 586 00:50:00,588 --> 00:50:04,163 Welcome to Bob's house. I'm Doris, I work here. -Hello. 587 00:50:04,288 --> 00:50:07,588 Please come in. Well come. -Thank you. 588 00:50:09,380 --> 00:50:14,005 May I present, Bob Kenner. 589 00:50:14,880 --> 00:50:17,421 Doris, don't make a deal of it. 590 00:50:19,380 --> 00:50:22,171 You look really handsome. -Thank you. 591 00:50:22,755 --> 00:50:25,838 Hi. - Hi. How are you? 592 00:50:27,088 --> 00:50:31,130 Okay. I'll leave your papers there. Do you have your keys? 593 00:50:31,546 --> 00:50:35,730 Yep. -Do you need something? -Nope. 594 00:50:36,588 --> 00:50:39,463 Oh, Mind the door! - Are you all right? -Easy, I mind the door. I'm fine. 595 00:50:39,588 --> 00:50:43,463 Did you bang your head? - No, I'm fine. Are you bleeding? - No, I'm fine. 596 00:50:43,588 --> 00:50:45,688 Have fun. 597 00:50:50,171 --> 00:50:52,271 You do look very nice. 598 00:50:52,796 --> 00:50:57,338 Thank you. So do you, you look very... green. 599 00:50:58,046 --> 00:51:00,921 Green? - like a good green. 600 00:51:01,046 --> 00:51:03,146 Okay. 601 00:51:03,630 --> 00:51:05,755 Can you hang on a second? Just one second. 602 00:51:05,880 --> 00:51:09,046 Yeah. - I promise I'll be quick. -Okay. 603 00:51:21,130 --> 00:51:23,230 Okay. - Okay. 604 00:51:23,838 --> 00:51:26,796 Let's do this. Let's do a date. 605 00:51:31,046 --> 00:51:34,963 Right, you sit down... Okay. 606 00:51:35,671 --> 00:51:38,463 Oh my God! What's the smell? 607 00:51:39,005 --> 00:51:42,630 Okay, I'll open it. Ready? 608 00:51:53,796 --> 00:51:58,796 Ugh! Ugh! Is that manure? -No, that... It's leaves. 609 00:52:00,380 --> 00:52:04,380 Right, leaves... - And what they're made into. 610 00:52:07,838 --> 00:52:11,963 I do not know. - Okay, why's it got windows? 611 00:52:12,130 --> 00:52:14,171 Are those windows? -Yeah. 612 00:52:14,296 --> 00:52:19,338 That looks like maggots. -No, that's not a... That's a house. A house. 613 00:52:21,963 --> 00:52:24,063 House of leaves! 614 00:52:26,130 --> 00:52:28,230 The House of Leaves. 615 00:52:28,713 --> 00:52:30,813 The House of Leaves. 616 00:52:33,255 --> 00:52:35,355 I love it. - Good. 617 00:52:35,880 --> 00:52:39,296 Um-hm. I really love it, it's very sweet.. - Good. 618 00:52:39,463 --> 00:52:43,296 Oh my God, I love it! - Great. Why House of Leaves? 619 00:52:43,421 --> 00:52:47,288 It's your favorite book. - My favorite book is "House of Cards". 620 00:52:47,413 --> 00:52:49,513 That is so much easier. 621 00:52:50,046 --> 00:52:52,963 That is, that is amazing. 622 00:52:55,588 --> 00:52:58,071 I'm glad you ate your noodles. 623 00:52:58,196 --> 00:53:01,338 You ate loads. Look at how much you ate, here. 624 00:53:01,463 --> 00:53:05,046 You're gonna be full. Yeah. - Very full. 625 00:53:05,171 --> 00:53:07,880 You're going to be bloated. -Yeah. 626 00:53:08,755 --> 00:53:11,671 Are you comfortable with, like, farting? 627 00:53:12,463 --> 00:53:18,296 Excuse me? - You know, like, if I winded you? - Like a baby? - Yeah. 628 00:53:18,755 --> 00:53:23,505 Uh.. I... No. No, oh, you were joking. - Yeah. 629 00:53:23,630 --> 00:53:26,463 That would really upset me. - It really would upset me... 630 00:53:26,671 --> 00:53:31,130 Okay. - I mean, not that much, because I'd be totally cool with it, if you wanted to, but... 631 00:53:31,255 --> 00:53:35,213 I really don't want you to wind me like a baby and make me fart. 632 00:53:41,546 --> 00:53:46,255 I mean, it was everywhere, so we had to cover the stain with a pile of books, 633 00:53:46,380 --> 00:53:50,130 But the guy he couldn't even see anyway, so we totally got away with it. 634 00:53:50,255 --> 00:53:53,380 Just. -That is amazing. -Yeah. 635 00:53:53,505 --> 00:53:57,046 That's crazy times. 636 00:54:04,588 --> 00:54:07,421 I have a cleaner for things like that. 637 00:54:08,505 --> 00:54:11,338 Yeah, you mentioned. 638 00:54:14,671 --> 00:54:16,880 What would you have used? - Me? 639 00:54:17,005 --> 00:54:20,588 If you had to? To get out the stain? What would you have used? 640 00:54:22,046 --> 00:54:26,088 I don't know. - Okay. Like a powder? 641 00:54:27,796 --> 00:54:30,005 Or a spray? 642 00:54:32,421 --> 00:54:35,921 Or mousse? A mousse thing? 643 00:54:40,630 --> 00:54:43,213 You really can't get drunk? 644 00:54:43,546 --> 00:54:46,088 It's to do with my veins, they are imperveous. 645 00:54:46,213 --> 00:54:48,313 Impervious. - Um hm. 646 00:54:49,255 --> 00:54:51,838 Im perrrr vious. 647 00:54:52,096 --> 00:54:54,963 Yeah. -I'm gonna get impervious with you, you filthy animal. 648 00:54:55,088 --> 00:54:58,171 Can I get you some water? Can I get you some of this? 649 00:54:58,421 --> 00:55:00,671 Ooh, I like your drapes. 650 00:55:05,213 --> 00:55:11,213 Bob! You are with British Gas! Don't let those fuckers push you around. Doris. 651 00:55:32,046 --> 00:55:34,146 June... - Yeah? 652 00:55:36,296 --> 00:55:39,296 You're a really lovely woman, and you're beautiful. 653 00:55:39,880 --> 00:55:41,980 Thanks. 654 00:55:42,213 --> 00:55:45,005 You're not so bad yourself, SuperBob. 655 00:55:46,255 --> 00:55:49,380 I thought you were gonna be one of those people 656 00:55:49,505 --> 00:55:52,421 who was like, above everyone else. 657 00:55:53,255 --> 00:55:56,296 You know. Because you can fly. 658 00:55:58,171 --> 00:56:02,963 But you're not. You're real, like me. 659 00:56:04,421 --> 00:56:07,171 Will you kiss me? - I can't. 660 00:56:08,255 --> 00:56:13,321 Why? We already did. - I'm sorry, I can't do this - Do what? It's just a kiss. 661 00:56:13,446 --> 00:56:16,746 I can't continue with this date, it wouldn't be right. 662 00:56:16,871 --> 00:56:21,088 It's nothing that you've done. I don't want to take advantage of you. 663 00:56:21,213 --> 00:56:24,088 I don't mind. - I want to take advantage of Doris. 664 00:56:24,213 --> 00:56:27,630 I didn't mean it like that, I want... 665 00:56:29,171 --> 00:56:33,880 What I mean is, I want to be with 666 00:56:35,546 --> 00:56:37,646 Doris. 667 00:56:37,838 --> 00:56:40,005 Oh, just kiss her, you fuckng plank. 668 00:56:40,130 --> 00:56:44,630 Barry, I didn't ask for your input. - She's fit. - I like Doris. 669 00:56:44,755 --> 00:56:46,855 Very fit. 670 00:56:47,046 --> 00:56:50,296 Where have you been all night? - I'm keeping me eye on the gnomes. 671 00:56:50,421 --> 00:56:54,171 I didn't know I had gnomes. - Yeah, you've got two. 672 00:56:55,880 --> 00:56:58,671 June, listen. - Bob, what I... 673 00:57:00,421 --> 00:57:02,713 Oh my god. They're here. 674 00:57:02,838 --> 00:57:05,588 Who's here? - Uh, How does my hair look? 675 00:57:05,713 --> 00:57:11,463 Your hair looks fine, why? Who's here? - Shoes. Ok Ok. 676 00:57:12,171 --> 00:57:14,880 Good evening, Bob. - Hello. - June... 677 00:57:15,005 --> 00:57:18,963 Now, have you finished all your paperwork? - Let's go, darling, let's get you dressed. - Darling? -Off 678 00:57:19,088 --> 00:57:21,880 Are we going somewhere? - Oh yes. Why is she calling me darling? Sorry... 679 00:57:22,005 --> 00:57:25,713 I just... didn't I just say something? - Don't mind me - You didn't hear. 680 00:57:26,171 --> 00:57:30,713 Okay. His hands are down my pants, why is that happening? - Just enjoy it, babe. 681 00:57:30,838 --> 00:57:34,130 Why am I wearing this? - It's the internationally approved uniform, Bob. 682 00:57:34,255 --> 00:57:39,255 They approved this? -Yes. - Were they blindfolded? - We have to show willing, okay, it's time to make ties. 683 00:57:39,838 --> 00:57:42,880 Yes. I'm aware it sounds strange. She told me not to make it to that lunch. 684 00:57:43,005 --> 00:57:46,421 Theresa told you not to come? - That you wouldn't make it, and that we would go to this thing tonight. 685 00:57:46,546 --> 00:57:48,857 Okay, so I don't even know what this is. I don't have time for any of this... 686 00:57:48,982 --> 00:57:51,963 I've got to do the most important thing I've ever done. 687 00:57:52,088 --> 00:57:54,463 Teresa, why am I here? - It doesn't matter. 688 00:57:54,588 --> 00:57:58,180 What's going on, why am I dressed like a New Romantic? 689 00:57:58,305 --> 00:58:02,346 June told me you stopped her from coming to lunch, she told me everything. 690 00:58:02,471 --> 00:58:04,505 Yes, I have pulled a lot of strings today, 691 00:58:04,630 --> 00:58:08,405 Do you have any idea the nightmare your "No" stunt has caused me? 692 00:58:08,530 --> 00:58:11,005 Theresa, we need to talk about this. 693 00:58:11,130 --> 00:58:16,213 I spoke to June, yes. For the greater good, okay? And it's all fine. 694 00:58:16,630 --> 00:58:18,713 Is it? 695 00:58:18,838 --> 00:58:25,338 Oh, Bob. We're good at this. This is what we do. 696 00:58:27,130 --> 00:58:29,230 We save the world. 697 00:58:42,535 --> 00:58:45,046 Bob, this is Xiang Chao from the Chinese Senate. 698 00:58:45,171 --> 00:58:48,263 He's here to talk about a set-down on nuclear policies. 699 00:58:48,388 --> 00:58:50,588 Nice to meet you. Yeah, ciao. - I'm pleased to. 700 00:58:50,713 --> 00:58:53,505 George Pardumo from Greece. - Please to meet you.. 701 00:58:53,630 --> 00:58:56,005 Yeah, it's nice to.... 702 00:58:56,130 --> 00:59:00,296 Theresa, this is not an explanation. -Dane Abudaui. 703 00:59:00,755 --> 00:59:05,671 Hello, Dane. - Are you in a mood? Yeah, I'm in a mood, because you told me... - Dallas Tango. 704 00:59:05,796 --> 00:59:08,588 What? - Super to meet you - Nice to meet you. - What do you mean, "what"? 705 00:59:08,713 --> 00:59:12,130 This is the French Senator Eleusi Savoir. 706 00:59:12,671 --> 00:59:16,546 Enchante. - We knew that you liked June, Bob. It was obvious to anyone 707 00:59:16,671 --> 00:59:20,171 All that haning around the library... - So you manupulated it. - I did not. No. 708 00:59:20,296 --> 00:59:25,046 She really does like you, just take a look. - It's true, I do. - Are you all right? 709 00:59:25,546 --> 00:59:27,630 There's nothing sinister going on here, Bob. 710 00:59:27,755 --> 00:59:31,088 I just needed to make sure that she was OK. I''m just looking out for you. 711 00:59:31,213 --> 00:59:34,838 It's not looking out for me if you make her go out with me. It's not real. 712 00:59:34,963 --> 00:59:36,988 You are sounding paranoid. 713 00:59:37,113 --> 00:59:41,213 Well, she did ask me to ask you out. But I would have asked you out anyway. 714 00:59:41,338 --> 00:59:45,788 Stand down, June, just stand down and smile. - Oh, so, there you go Theresa, this has to stop. I need my own life back. 715 00:59:45,913 --> 00:59:49,171 This is the dignitary from Rome, Giuseppe Kotelo. 716 00:59:49,671 --> 00:59:53,588 Good evening. - Bona Sera. -Thank you. 717 00:59:53,713 --> 00:59:59,171 I really think you should give June a chance she really does have an awfull lot to recommend her. - I want Doris. 718 00:59:59,463 --> 01:00:04,046 What? -My cleaner. -I know who she is, Bob. 719 01:00:04,171 --> 01:00:06,546 Come and shake the hand... - Don't. Nevermind. 720 01:00:06,713 --> 01:00:11,588 I've decided. If she will let me, I want to be with Doris. 721 01:00:11,755 --> 01:00:16,088 Ah! This is Doris? -No, this is not Doris. -Yes! 722 01:00:19,796 --> 01:00:23,588 Doris is from Colombia. You just can't be with anyone from Colombia. 723 01:00:23,713 --> 01:00:25,921 Why not? -It's complicated. 724 01:00:26,588 --> 01:00:29,755 And she's a cleaner. It's really not the right narrative. 725 01:00:30,505 --> 01:00:34,421 You should be with June. June's fun. And she's American. 726 01:00:34,546 --> 01:00:37,380 But I don't want to be with June. - Bob, she's right there. 727 01:00:37,505 --> 01:00:40,505 It's fine, I've told her. -It's fine. 728 01:00:40,963 --> 01:00:44,838 Are you all right? - Okay, you don't have to be with her, Bob. 729 01:00:44,963 --> 01:00:50,546 You just have to stand near her sometimes. It's what we need. -Who is "we"? 730 01:00:50,671 --> 01:00:56,296 The United Kingdom. Great Britain. The MOD. You. All of us. 731 01:00:56,421 --> 01:01:01,588 Now you need to start listening to me again. It was a very bad decision you made not to shake hands with the Senator. 732 01:01:01,713 --> 01:01:04,130 Alexis Sanjiv, this is SuperBob. 733 01:01:04,255 --> 01:01:08,046 Okay so thats what this is about. All right. Okay, thank you. 734 01:01:08,713 --> 01:01:11,588 Sometimes saving the world isn't about flying into danger, 735 01:01:11,713 --> 01:01:14,463 Sometimes it's about making sacrifices of your own. 736 01:01:14,588 --> 01:01:17,505 Do you have any idea the sacrifices I've made? 737 01:01:17,921 --> 01:01:22,296 Let's go. - June! Seriously. I do not know how I could make this any clearer. This is weird. 738 01:01:22,421 --> 01:01:27,255 Do I not get to have love? -June, could you just give us a moment please? -Yes, of course. 739 01:01:29,380 --> 01:01:31,588 Let's talk about Doris. -Please. 740 01:01:31,713 --> 01:01:36,505 Do you know what is right for her? -Yes. - Not you, what is right for Doris. -Yes, of course I do. 741 01:01:36,630 --> 01:01:39,005 What does she want, Bob? -She wants... 742 01:01:40,255 --> 01:01:43,713 She wants a nursery in Colombia, that is what she's always wanted. 743 01:01:46,963 --> 01:01:49,038 And this is Colonel Matayzu. 744 01:01:49,163 --> 01:01:52,671 Bob, Bob, Bob... It is an honor to meet you. 745 01:01:53,130 --> 01:01:58,380 We are so looking forward to having your help in combating the uprising in our country. 746 01:01:58,505 --> 01:02:03,672 Why am I here, Theresa? - Bob, what do you think this Weapons Summit is about? 747 01:02:05,671 --> 01:02:10,005 I hadn't seen that. - You're the only weapon anyone cares about. 748 01:02:11,796 --> 01:02:14,255 And this is Senator Jackson. 749 01:02:14,921 --> 01:02:20,630 Bob Kenner! I am so pleased you've decided to play ball, and 750 01:02:21,255 --> 01:02:26,255 Obviously I'm delighted to hear about your union to this lovely American lady. 751 01:02:28,171 --> 01:02:30,838 Is this the man who needed a handshake earlier today? 752 01:02:30,963 --> 01:02:33,338 Well, yeah, but we're all good now. 753 01:02:35,130 --> 01:02:39,880 Ha, ha, ha, yeah, right. So, wait - So all of this, all of this is so you can have a handshake? 754 01:02:41,838 --> 01:02:43,938 Is that right? 755 01:02:46,088 --> 01:02:48,188 Okay. 756 01:02:48,838 --> 01:02:50,880 Ha, ha, ha, there ya go. 757 01:02:51,005 --> 01:02:53,013 Was it worth it? 758 01:02:53,138 --> 01:02:57,138 Hey, I am so glad we could sort out that Colombia situation. 759 01:02:59,130 --> 01:03:01,796 What Colombia situation? - Your cleaner. 760 01:03:02,088 --> 01:03:07,880 We bought her a nursery! And a first class ticket for Bogota, next flight. 761 01:03:12,046 --> 01:03:16,171 You sent her away? - It's what you wanted, right? 762 01:03:17,213 --> 01:03:20,963 Are you joking? - I thought you said you wanted what was right for her, Bob. 763 01:03:21,088 --> 01:03:24,505 Hey, he wants what's right for all of us, don't you, Bob? 764 01:03:24,630 --> 01:03:27,630 Yeah. Just like you wanted a handshake. 765 01:03:27,755 --> 01:03:32,338 Hey, everybody is here to broker a real sweet deal for you, Bob. 766 01:03:32,463 --> 01:03:35,255 This is gonna be a lot of money in it for you. 767 01:03:35,463 --> 01:03:39,880 I'm just shaking your hand. Just like you wanted. 768 01:03:40,255 --> 01:03:44,546 Bob. - And SuperBob, our very own Bob Kenner is here today... 769 01:03:44,671 --> 01:03:47,005 Is this the handshake you wanted? 770 01:03:47,380 --> 01:03:50,963 Boe Kenner! Put Senator Jackson down now! 771 01:03:51,421 --> 01:03:54,671 It is supposed to be my day off! 772 01:04:01,013 --> 01:04:04,355 I don't care if you bring him down or not, just shoot the bastard! 773 01:04:04,480 --> 01:04:08,030 Uncomfirmed reports are coming in about an explosion at the Ministry of Defense. 774 01:04:08,155 --> 01:04:10,163 The explosion at the Ministry of Defence was caused by SuperBob... 775 01:04:10,288 --> 01:04:13,213 London is tonight on high alert as Superbob... 776 01:04:13,338 --> 01:04:17,930 Police and military forces around the world are combining their efforts to track down SuperBob. 777 01:04:18,055 --> 01:04:20,288 ... we have not lost control of SuperBob. 778 01:04:20,413 --> 01:04:22,788 Everyone is to stay calm, and not jump to conclusions. 779 01:04:22,913 --> 01:04:25,671 Right. So, where exactly is he? - I can't tell you that. 780 01:04:25,796 --> 01:04:30,171 There have been uncomfirmed sightings of SuperBob in New York, Tokyo, Bogotá... 781 01:04:31,588 --> 01:04:35,630 I'm looking for somebody, her name is Doris. She'll be on a flight from England. 782 01:04:35,755 --> 01:04:39,046 Uh, what is her last name? - Ohhh... that is something I should know. 783 01:04:41,546 --> 01:04:45,671 My Mum would know. Can I call my Mum? Guh! I know where she is! 784 01:04:46,255 --> 01:04:49,588 My man said he heard mumbling about someone called Morris. - ...said he was screaming "Forrest!" 785 01:04:49,713 --> 01:04:53,546 ...apparently asking for a Florist. -... is, or what he would do next. 786 01:04:53,671 --> 01:04:58,713 Tensions between the United Kingdom and the United States of America have never been higher. 787 01:04:58,838 --> 01:05:03,838 The Ecuadoran Embassy has offered SuperBob political asylum. - Stay in your homes, try to hide. 788 01:05:03,963 --> 01:05:09,296 Whatever he has planned, it could spell disaster for us all. 789 01:05:11,088 --> 01:05:15,088 Doris. We're meant to be together. 790 01:05:16,796 --> 01:05:20,421 I don't even feel like I have to say it, because I feel like you probably know. 791 01:05:20,546 --> 01:05:23,630 'Cause I know, and I think I've probably always known. 792 01:05:24,455 --> 01:05:27,513 The MOD is assuring the public that SuperBob is not dangerous. 793 01:05:27,638 --> 01:05:32,005 The British government asking the public to remain calm. - Military helicopters are at high alert, ready to strike... 794 01:05:32,130 --> 01:05:35,963 Peckham High Street, where he allegedly bought a Wham Bar. 795 01:05:36,088 --> 01:05:40,255 I do, I do love your face. I said it before and it sounded like a joke, 796 01:05:40,380 --> 01:05:44,255 But I mean it. I like your face, I like what it does. 797 01:05:44,380 --> 01:05:48,713 I like what it has to say, and you know, I like everything with the face, 798 01:05:49,005 --> 01:05:52,130 I wouldn't want a face in a jar, just looking at me... 799 01:05:52,713 --> 01:05:55,588 A huge number of witnesses report seeing SuperBob landing in Peckham 800 01:05:55,713 --> 01:05:59,005 Police are heading towards the Peckham area. - someone claims he was eating a Wham Bar. 801 01:05:59,130 --> 01:06:02,505 The international man hunt is zeroing in on Peckham. - South London. 802 01:06:02,630 --> 01:06:06,505 The Prime Minister has asked for SuperBob to surrender himself immediately. 803 01:06:06,630 --> 01:06:10,130 Okay, don't say any of that. No not. Don't open your mouth, 804 01:06:10,255 --> 01:06:16,130 Just... just walk in, and... ... try and kiss her. 805 01:06:18,963 --> 01:06:22,838 The MOD has described it as a diplomatic nightmare. 806 01:06:22,963 --> 01:06:28,046 Authorities say that if Kenner can not be stopped, he can at least be contained. 807 01:06:28,171 --> 01:06:33,588 Doris! - You came to see me again! - What? No, I haven't come to see you, Mum. - Charming. 808 01:06:33,713 --> 01:06:37,380 What are you doing here, Bob? Where's June? - Why are you asking me about June? I'm here to see you. 809 01:06:37,505 --> 01:06:40,963 You came to see me. - I haven't come to see you, Mum. I already saw you today! 810 01:06:41,088 --> 01:06:45,213 A short while ago security cameras caught SuperBob arriving outside of his Mother's care home. 811 01:06:45,338 --> 01:06:47,430 The authorities have been mobilized. 812 01:06:47,555 --> 01:06:51,096 I went all the way to Colombia, then I went to the airport, there were no flights to Colombia tonight. 813 01:06:51,221 --> 01:06:55,963 I know. - I know you know, that's why you're here! - A large crowd has gathered outside the care home... 814 01:06:56,088 --> 01:06:59,338 And it appears local residents are not letting the authorities inside. 815 01:06:59,463 --> 01:07:05,296 SuperBob has been very good to us, right? After all he's done to us, he's a Peckham People. Peckham People! 816 01:07:05,421 --> 01:07:08,546 A Gospel choir has formed a human shield around the care home... 817 01:07:08,671 --> 01:07:12,338 It's a stand-off. In Peckham. -What is all this trouble? 818 01:07:12,463 --> 01:07:14,755 This trouble? It's because of you. 819 01:07:14,880 --> 01:07:18,088 Don't bring me into your mess, Bob. I am nothing to do with your mess. 820 01:07:18,213 --> 01:07:20,755 If you think I'm responsible for any of this, 821 01:07:20,880 --> 01:07:26,046 then you are very disrespectful of me, of my culture... -Doris, please! Shut up for a minute! 822 01:07:26,171 --> 01:07:32,255 ... he's been hiding inside, I'm going to try to get in there, see if I can have a chat or a word with him. 823 01:07:33,088 --> 01:07:36,088 I've come here to be nice to you. 824 01:07:36,880 --> 01:07:39,046 I need to tell you something. 825 01:07:45,630 --> 01:07:49,755 Hey, Bob. -You know Javier. 826 01:07:50,338 --> 01:07:54,671 Yeah. -Javier just... - Good to see you again. 827 01:07:54,796 --> 01:07:58,630 Hey, Javi. Do you work and night shift as well? 828 01:07:59,338 --> 01:08:03,380 No, Bob. Maybe you will understand this. 829 01:08:04,838 --> 01:08:08,380 I found out Doris was going to leave for Colombia 830 01:08:08,505 --> 01:08:12,588 And I realized something I think I've always known. 831 01:08:14,213 --> 01:08:16,796 We are meant to be together. 832 01:08:17,296 --> 01:08:20,963 And I know it. Doris knows it. All of Peckham knows it, 833 01:08:21,088 --> 01:08:25,005 It's so blindingly obvious, it was staring me in the face. 834 01:08:25,296 --> 01:08:28,505 And I spent too long just doing what I was told, 835 01:08:28,671 --> 01:08:34,213 Scared to say "No" to anything. Scared to... stand up for myself. 836 01:08:36,546 --> 01:08:41,505 And then I heard that she was leaving and I thought now is the time for me to say "No". 837 01:08:42,130 --> 01:08:46,338 No, Doris. I do not want you to leave. 838 01:08:48,463 --> 01:08:51,921 I want you here. With me. 839 01:08:53,880 --> 01:08:57,838 Do you understand this, Bob? - Yeah, I have some idea, yeah. 840 01:08:58,546 --> 01:09:02,963 After all, I love your face. -oh, fuck off. 841 01:09:04,671 --> 01:09:07,796 Is Bob inside? -Yes, he is inside. -Okay, what's he doing in there? 842 01:09:07,921 --> 01:09:10,838 None of your business, it's something important. 843 01:09:11,796 --> 01:09:16,213 That's great news, congratulations. - Thank you, Bob. 844 01:09:20,296 --> 01:09:25,921 Well I don't know why I'm hanging around here, he loves your face. This is stupid, I should go. -Bob. 845 01:09:26,046 --> 01:09:30,546 What? - What did you want to say to me? 846 01:09:37,505 --> 01:09:42,213 I just wanted to say goodbye. - Goodbye, Bob. 847 01:09:46,880 --> 01:09:50,046 Thank you. For everything. 848 01:09:51,588 --> 01:09:53,688 Goodbye. -Goodbye. 849 01:10:25,463 --> 01:10:29,421 Okay. ...Okay. 850 01:10:33,963 --> 01:10:36,063 Okay. 851 01:10:37,963 --> 01:10:40,713 I think that's enough goodbye. 852 01:10:48,380 --> 01:10:51,213 Oh, good to catch up, Bob. Take care. 853 01:10:52,005 --> 01:10:55,546 What did you want to say to me? -I think you should go. 854 01:10:55,671 --> 01:10:58,088 What? - To Colombia, I think you should go. 855 01:10:58,213 --> 01:11:01,213 You see, this is why I love you. Doris I would never want you to leave. 856 01:11:01,338 --> 01:11:05,546 For the kids. You were supposed to be working with children, you have a gift for it. 857 01:11:05,671 --> 01:11:09,421 How do you know that, you have never seen me with a child? - You looked after me for three years. 858 01:11:09,546 --> 01:11:12,005 You want me to go? -Yeah. 859 01:11:12,755 --> 01:11:18,171 But... I could come with you. - How? 860 01:11:18,421 --> 01:11:21,455 I can fly faster than a speeding bullet, I can work from anywhere. 861 01:11:21,580 --> 01:11:25,338 You know what, I could come with you, I have family there. That's easier, Doris. 862 01:11:25,463 --> 01:11:29,130 Maybe he's right. You should help the kids. - He makes a good point. 863 01:11:29,255 --> 01:11:32,463 We can get a house. I could work from there. -True. 864 01:11:32,588 --> 01:11:36,171 Yes, but the visa application... Oh, it's very impractical. 865 01:11:36,296 --> 01:11:40,930 I am resident, Doris, so... much easier. - We should go. 866 01:11:41,055 --> 01:11:44,713 The MOD will not like it. -Oh, fuck the MOD. - Language! 867 01:11:44,838 --> 01:11:48,838 You would do that for me? -Take my hand. - Mmm, not flying. -We'll walk. 868 01:11:48,963 --> 01:11:53,630 I'm very strong. - I'm fuckin' invulnerable. - But you see Doris, I am vulnerable. 869 01:11:53,755 --> 01:11:57,130 I can fly. -I have a nice car. -I hate flying. -She hates the flying. 870 01:11:57,255 --> 01:12:00,921 I'm gonna kill you, mate. .. Let's go. 871 01:12:02,296 --> 01:12:06,130 Ah, my bag. -Ai, cabrone! - I'm so sorry, Javier, I've been crushing hands all day. 872 01:12:06,255 --> 01:12:08,588 That is really unlike me, that was out of order. You seem like a nice man. - Goodbye, Mrs. Kenner. 873 01:12:08,713 --> 01:12:13,421 I wish you all the best, we are gonna go. -Good. -I love you, Mum. -I love you too. 874 01:12:13,546 --> 01:12:18,296 Bye, Ted. - And you know what would make me happy, don't you? -What's that, Mum? -Grandchildren! 875 01:12:18,421 --> 01:12:22,504 Oh, God. The one thing I don't need in bed is more pressure. 876 01:12:24,838 --> 01:12:27,046 Is the Jamaican girl still here? 877 01:12:31,130 --> 01:12:37,671 A whistleblower within the MOD has stated that no one in the department has any idea what SuperBob will do next. 878 01:12:41,130 --> 01:12:43,255 The MOD strenuously denying this allegation, 879 01:12:43,380 --> 01:12:49,380 They insist that there is no reason to panic but, for the time being, he remains unaccounted for. 880 01:12:55,880 --> 01:13:00,796 Why is Bob hiding? - He's not hiding. He's doing something important that does not concern you. 881 01:13:00,921 --> 01:13:04,463 The world waits to see what will happen when SuperBob emerges. 882 01:13:04,588 --> 01:13:10,463 All of you, all of you just take liberties, and you come in here to exploit SuperBob. 883 01:13:12,130 --> 01:13:17,463 The people of Peckham they are blocking all the doors to the care home here, as you can see, 884 01:13:17,588 --> 01:13:21,380 and failing to allow any of the authorities inside. 885 01:13:39,671 --> 01:13:42,171 Okay. So. 886 01:13:45,838 --> 01:13:49,213 What are you doing? Jesus Christ, that is very dangerous! 887 01:13:49,588 --> 01:13:52,630 I'm really sorry. - I'm invincible, what do you think you're doing? 888 01:13:52,755 --> 01:13:55,046 That is really dangerous. There are children about! 889 01:13:55,171 --> 01:13:58,046 I'm sorry everyone. Really sorry. I've thrown the whole mood down. 890 01:13:58,171 --> 01:14:01,838 Don't fire a gun... Why is all this? It's a complete waste of money. 891 01:14:02,796 --> 01:14:06,046 This is ruined. I sleep in this! 892 01:14:06,213 --> 01:14:08,313 You all look very foolish. 893 01:14:08,671 --> 01:14:12,171 There's something very important I have to say, if you don't mind. 894 01:14:14,088 --> 01:14:18,713 I am resigning from the MOD. I am going freelance. 895 01:14:19,046 --> 01:14:21,755 I am no longer the property of Britain. 896 01:14:22,421 --> 01:14:26,505 And there's gonna be no more forms. No more fucking forms. 897 01:14:26,671 --> 01:14:30,171 There, I said it. I don't like forms, all right? There's going to be none of them. What? 898 01:14:30,296 --> 01:14:34,713 Self-assessment forms. -What's it? -You go freelance you have to use self-assessment forms. 899 01:14:34,838 --> 01:14:38,946 Are you serious? Right. There's going to be one form. There's going to be one form, but that doesn't matter. 900 01:14:39,071 --> 01:14:41,088 You don't need to worry about it. That's not really the point. The point is, look... 901 01:14:41,213 --> 01:14:47,046 If any of you are in trouble, and you need help, contact me and I will help you. 902 01:14:47,171 --> 01:14:50,880 I don't know how you contact me, we used to have a system when I was with the MOD, 903 01:14:51,005 --> 01:14:56,172 Now we don't have, so... maybe we have a thing that flashes, like a red and, uh... 904 01:14:57,130 --> 01:15:02,296 Okay, fuck it! 07700900249. That's my number. All right? 905 01:15:02,796 --> 01:15:09,005 You can call me, and I will help you. But don't abuse the - it's already ringing. 906 01:15:09,380 --> 01:15:13,005 Okay. I will not deliver pizzas, I'm saying that on live TV. 907 01:15:13,130 --> 01:15:16,088 That is off the table. I would like some time off. 908 01:15:21,755 --> 01:15:24,213 Someone very special in my life. 909 01:15:25,838 --> 01:15:28,671 I would like to try and make her happy. 910 01:15:31,046 --> 01:15:36,880 If any of you are in trouble and need you need help, you call me. 911 01:15:38,213 --> 01:15:40,313 And I will save you. 912 01:15:41,630 --> 01:15:45,796 I am not a civil servant. I'm SuperBob. 913 01:15:50,963 --> 01:15:53,063 Doris... 914 01:15:55,005 --> 01:15:57,105 Let's go. 915 01:15:58,671 --> 01:16:00,771 Bob... 916 01:16:04,296 --> 01:16:06,396 Bye, Theresa. 917 01:16:42,880 --> 01:16:45,655 Hey! -Hi. -How are you guys? 918 01:16:45,780 --> 01:16:47,796 Good, how are you? -Good. 919 01:16:47,921 --> 01:16:52,588 Great. You look really good. -So do you. Growing a beard. -Thank you. 920 01:16:54,546 --> 01:16:59,671 So here we are. Are you happy? -Am I happy? 921 01:17:03,046 --> 01:17:07,629 We don't need words. We don't need to see each other, to know. 922 01:17:07,880 --> 01:17:09,896 We... You know? 923 01:17:10,021 --> 01:17:15,296 We built a home together. We've got a home that we live in. 924 01:17:16,838 --> 01:17:18,938 Am I happy? 925 01:17:20,171 --> 01:17:25,671 I have been moved to Afghanistan. A relief. Very happy about that. 926 01:17:27,088 --> 01:17:31,505 You've no idea what my life was like before, a constant firefight. 927 01:17:31,880 --> 01:17:34,588 Afghanistan, this is easy. 928 01:17:35,963 --> 01:17:37,963 This is a joy. 929 01:17:38,088 --> 01:17:42,755 This is a delight. They'll be fine. 930 01:17:50,255 --> 01:17:55,088 She's a nightmare. She literally never shuts up, she doesn't stop talking. 931 01:17:55,255 --> 01:18:00,463 You have to send help, I can't take it anymore. - What did you say? -Nothing. 932 01:18:01,713 --> 01:18:04,463 I will see these films, you know? -Yeah. 933 01:18:05,171 --> 01:18:10,421 So why did you say something? -'Cause I'm an idiot? -'Cause you are an idiot. -Okay. 934 01:18:10,546 --> 01:18:12,646 Come here. 935 01:18:18,213 --> 01:18:21,255 Hello? Okay, where are you? 936 01:18:21,921 --> 01:18:24,021 Hasta luego. 937 01:18:28,796 --> 01:18:32,963 Hi. -Go. Save the world. 938 01:18:37,296 --> 01:18:39,396 Hi Barry. 939 01:19:15,796 --> 01:19:21,213 We're looking at the rock, the meteor if you like, that struck Bob from Peckham Rye Park. 940 01:19:21,880 --> 01:19:24,630 It could hold the key to his powers. 941 01:19:24,755 --> 01:19:29,046 If we find the answer to that, there's no telling what we could do. 942 01:19:29,171 --> 01:19:33,504 Have you found anything? -No. Six years, absolutely fuck-all. 943 01:19:33,755 --> 01:19:36,380 It might as well be a purple turd. 944 01:19:36,505 --> 01:19:42,796 So I had another accident at work, and Bob turned up, and it was just a superb experience. 945 01:19:44,713 --> 01:19:48,546 Got me out safely, lovely small talk, made sure I was okay, 946 01:19:48,671 --> 01:19:54,588 Didn't have to fill in any forms, and didn't stink of onions. So, thank you, Bob. 947 01:19:55,130 --> 01:19:59,255 Is he in there now? -No, he's not in there now. -Sorry. 948 01:19:59,380 --> 01:20:03,088 I mean, it's a proverbial home. -I see. 949 01:20:03,338 --> 01:20:08,255 You know? I mean, who writes your questions, man? -Sorry. 950 01:20:08,380 --> 01:20:12,630 So you got saved by Bob again, what was that like? - Yeah, I fell down a pothole. 951 01:20:12,755 --> 01:20:16,880 I got my leg trapped. He came, was very swift. 952 01:20:17,005 --> 01:20:22,213 Utterly charming, affable, looks great, and was just lovely. 953 01:20:22,713 --> 01:20:25,796 Just a really lovely experience. I'm really happy. 954 01:20:26,963 --> 01:20:29,421 So got a little thing for him, have you? 955 01:20:29,546 --> 01:20:34,046 I'm married. - It's impressive you know SuperBob. 956 01:20:34,171 --> 01:20:39,754 Saw the bloke from "Birds of a Feather" about three weeks ago just down Stevenage Road. 957 01:20:40,546 --> 01:20:43,213 You know... just, whatever. 958 01:22:15,963 --> 01:22:20,546 Doesn't it fly by? Doesn't it? Doesn't it though, like... whoosh. 959 01:22:23,546 --> 01:22:27,546 ... 89579