Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:00,080
*
2
00:00:00,080 --> 00:00:02,080
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
3
00:00:04,280 --> 00:00:06,920
(SIGHS)
Who's the, uh, deceased, Sarge?
4
00:00:06,920 --> 00:00:09,320
Well, uh, this may shock you.
5
00:00:12,880 --> 00:00:15,120
I didn't even know we
had a morgue in here.
6
00:00:15,120 --> 00:00:17,120
Who's this poor guy?
7
00:00:17,560 --> 00:00:19,560
(YELLS)
8
00:00:20,360 --> 00:00:23,240
('WELLINGTON PARANORMAL' THEME)
9
00:00:34,600 --> 00:00:36,600
(MUSIC CONTINUES)
10
00:00:50,480 --> 00:00:52,960
Does that mean I'm dead?
Am I a ghost?
11
00:00:52,960 --> 00:00:57,160
No, of course not, Minogue.
Obviously you're not dead, Minogue,
and you're not a ghost, OK?
12
00:00:57,160 --> 00:01:00,480
Do you have a twin?
No, I'd remember
something like that.
13
00:01:00,480 --> 00:01:02,480
You'd better show them.
14
00:01:03,840 --> 00:01:06,120
(CLEARS THROAT)
That's weird, eh?
Mm.
15
00:01:06,120 --> 00:01:09,640
I've never... I've never seen
anything like that in my life.
16
00:01:09,640 --> 00:01:12,600
This is a far-out-there theory,
so maybe not for your ears.
17
00:01:12,600 --> 00:01:15,480
If you could... Please. Thank you.
18
00:01:15,640 --> 00:01:18,880
(CLEARS THROAT) Maybe this
is Minogue from the future,
19
00:01:18,880 --> 00:01:23,080
and he's travelled back
to the present, but he died.
20
00:01:23,080 --> 00:01:24,960
What happened to my
thingy in the future?
21
00:01:24,960 --> 00:01:27,760
Well, that's what
we need to find out.
Hmm.
22
00:01:27,760 --> 00:01:29,760
Looks like a quiet town.
Yeah.
23
00:01:29,760 --> 00:01:32,200
Hard to believe that anything out of
the ordinary would happen out here ―
24
00:01:32,200 --> 00:01:35,760
but then, I guess, it's sometimes
the less-suspecting places where the
weirdest stuff happens, isn't it?
25
00:01:35,760 --> 00:01:39,480
I suspect it's the most-suspecting
places where it happens.
26
00:01:39,480 --> 00:01:41,840
So, we're here to question
the proprietor of the local dairy,
27
00:01:41,840 --> 00:01:45,160
uh, before we head
to the spot where the corpse
resembling Minogue was found.
28
00:01:45,160 --> 00:01:47,800
Although it didn't exactly
resemble me, did it?
29
00:01:47,800 --> 00:01:51,240
It sort of vaguely looked like me ―
sorta like a deader version of me.
30
00:01:51,240 --> 00:01:55,120
But we're just gonna pop in here
and have a chat to the owner,
see what he can tell us, um,
31
00:01:55,120 --> 00:01:58,440
about the corpse that resembled me,
just to see what he knows.
32
00:01:58,440 --> 00:02:03,320
Um, I guess while we're here, we
could also double this up as lunch
or sort of a morning tea situation.
33
00:02:03,320 --> 00:02:05,440
Um, we could both―
I thought your brother Adam
made your lunch today.
34
00:02:05,440 --> 00:02:07,000
Hmm.
35
00:02:07,000 --> 00:02:08,320
(DOOR ALERT BEEPS)
Hello there.
36
00:02:08,320 --> 00:02:10,320
Gidday, mate.
Hi, sir.
37
00:02:10,320 --> 00:02:12,320
(EERIE MUSIC)
38
00:02:12,600 --> 00:02:14,720
Have... Have we met before?
39
00:02:14,720 --> 00:02:17,520
Met before?
Yeah. Have I met you before?
40
00:02:17,520 --> 00:02:20,800
He looks really familiar.
I think I'd remember those eyes.
(SNIFFS)
41
00:02:20,800 --> 00:02:23,200
OK. Um, look, sir, this
might sound a little bit odd,
42
00:02:23,200 --> 00:02:30,240
but did you happen to serve a police
officer in here yesterday who looked
very much like my partner here?
43
00:02:30,240 --> 00:02:32,880
(SNIFFS)
So, did you see anything?
44
00:02:32,880 --> 00:02:35,520
(SNIFFS)
A police officer that looked
quite a bit like my partner here?
45
00:02:35,520 --> 00:02:37,720
In fact, exactly like him?
46
00:02:37,720 --> 00:02:39,720
(TONGS CLATTER)
47
00:02:40,600 --> 00:02:43,440
Minogue, we're supposed
to be investigating,
(WHISPERS) not buying food.
48
00:02:43,440 --> 00:02:46,000
So you didn't see a police officer
who looked just like this?
49
00:02:46,000 --> 00:02:48,000
You are one of the many.
50
00:02:48,360 --> 00:02:52,840
Sorry, wh―? One of the many what?
You must go to the motel.
51
00:02:52,840 --> 00:02:54,120
No, we're not gonna stay here,
52
00:02:54,120 --> 00:02:57,880
I don't think, mate.
There you will find
the answers that you seek.
53
00:02:57,880 --> 00:03:00,720
Do you know your food's quite dusty?
54
00:03:00,720 --> 00:03:03,560
I'm pretty sure all of it
is at least a year old.
55
00:03:03,560 --> 00:03:06,560
Look, um, sir, if you do happen to
remember serving a police officer,
56
00:03:06,560 --> 00:03:10,200
um, please just give me
a call on this number.
57
00:03:10,200 --> 00:03:12,800
Thank you.
Yeah. Thanks, mate.
58
00:03:17,320 --> 00:03:20,400
Keep an eye out for Maisey?
We're not here to investigate
cows, Minogue.
59
00:03:20,400 --> 00:03:23,160
No, I know, but there's
a 700 reward, so...
60
00:03:23,160 --> 00:03:25,680
little bit of pocket money? Eh?
We'll keep an eye out.
61
00:03:25,680 --> 00:03:29,440
Look out for a cow
with blue earrings.
(DOOR ALERT BEEPS)
62
00:03:29,440 --> 00:03:33,520
I'm sure I've met that guy before.
And what was with that 'go to the
motel' business?
63
00:03:33,520 --> 00:03:37,320
Yeah, well, maybe he's just
promoting local businesses.
He's doin' a good job.
64
00:03:37,320 --> 00:03:40,120
Tell you what, the food
was dusty, though.
Oh, it was gross.
65
00:03:40,120 --> 00:03:43,640
Some of it was so old, it didn't
even have an expiry date on it.
Yeah, it's interesting, though.
66
00:03:43,640 --> 00:03:46,040
I mean, what d'you reckon it means?
I'll tell you what it means.
67
00:03:46,040 --> 00:03:49,800
It means I'm gonna have
to eat this salad that my brother,
Adam, made for me.
68
00:03:49,800 --> 00:03:54,760
(SIGHS) I mean, can you call
it a salad when it's just leaves?
I mean, that's just lettuce leaves.
69
00:03:54,760 --> 00:03:56,680
Oh, gross.
What?
70
00:03:56,680 --> 00:03:59,440
It's got a slug in it. I hate slugs.
Oh.
71
00:03:59,440 --> 00:04:02,200
Yeah, well, don't waste it.
I mean, just eat around it.
72
00:04:02,200 --> 00:04:04,520
So, we're here where the body
of the deceased was found.
73
00:04:04,520 --> 00:04:07,080
As you can see, the outline
of the deceased Minogue
74
00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:10,120
is in fact the exact
same size as the, um...
75
00:04:10,120 --> 00:04:13,080
as the live Minogue is now.
It's a perfect fit, O'Leary.
76
00:04:13,080 --> 00:04:17,960
Uh, you're not
supposed to be in there.
Nah, it feels weird.
77
00:04:18,680 --> 00:04:21,080
But you walk down the street,
you would think that was me.
78
00:04:21,080 --> 00:04:24,040
Wouldn't you? If you saw that,
you'd go, 'Minogue.'
79
00:04:24,040 --> 00:04:26,240
Straight away.
I'm not sure that―
No, not necessarily.
80
00:04:26,240 --> 00:04:29,920
Um, I mean, it was just uncanny
that it was exactly the right...
81
00:04:29,920 --> 00:04:31,280
Uncanny.
Yep.
82
00:04:31,280 --> 00:04:35,280
Oh, look. Reckon that could be the
motel that guy was talking about.
83
00:04:35,280 --> 00:04:37,680
Well, surely there's not
more than one out here.
Wouldn't have thought so,
84
00:04:37,680 --> 00:04:41,680
nah, not here.
I mean, it certainly does seem
like a rather peculiar place.
85
00:04:41,680 --> 00:04:46,080
Mm.
I mean, seeing the chalk outline
itself is― is rather strange.
86
00:04:46,080 --> 00:04:49,960
It's not the sort of thing
that we would do in the city,
um, in our policing. Is it?
87
00:04:49,960 --> 00:04:52,760
No. Well, it's considered vandalism.
It's strictly prohibited.
88
00:04:52,760 --> 00:04:54,480
That's― It's only
chalk, though, isn't it?
89
00:04:54,480 --> 00:04:57,320
Well, that's what I said, um,
but they didn't wanna hear it,...
Mm.
90
00:04:57,320 --> 00:05:00,520
...and I spent three
days in the cells.
91
00:05:01,080 --> 00:05:03,080
What?
92
00:05:03,600 --> 00:05:05,600
What?
My hat.
Ugh.
93
00:05:07,120 --> 00:05:09,120
Slug's back. Look.
94
00:05:09,800 --> 00:05:12,800
On my hat.
Well, just flick... flick it off.
95
00:05:12,800 --> 00:05:17,760
The slug's off now.
If that comes in the car...
Look, it's fine. The slug's off.
96
00:05:17,760 --> 00:05:19,760
(DOORS LOCK)
97
00:05:22,120 --> 00:05:25,640
(HANDLE RATTLES)
Those guys are watching.
98
00:05:25,640 --> 00:05:28,400
Do you promise to―?
Open the doors, Minogue.
Do you promise―?
99
00:05:28,400 --> 00:05:32,160
Are slugs part of the worm family,
or are they just snails
100
00:05:32,160 --> 00:05:35,480
that don't have shells?
Well, no, they're... slugs.
101
00:05:35,480 --> 00:05:37,280
Yeah, I know they're slugs,
but I guess my question is ―
102
00:05:37,280 --> 00:05:40,720
do we need to have slugs when
we've already got snails?
103
00:05:40,720 --> 00:05:41,800
(ENGINE STOPS)
I'll google it.
104
00:05:41,800 --> 00:05:44,360
Do you realise how
amazing those things are?
(KEYPAD TAPS)
105
00:05:44,360 --> 00:05:46,200
Do I?
It's a muscular foot.
106
00:05:46,200 --> 00:05:48,280
How much do you need
a muscular foot?
107
00:05:48,280 --> 00:05:51,400
Well, if you've only got
that as your whole body,
I'd say quite a lot.
108
00:05:51,400 --> 00:05:54,160
If you saw a big enormous
foot going down the road,
109
00:05:54,160 --> 00:05:56,720
would you think that
was great or gross?
110
00:05:56,720 --> 00:06:00,080
I'd think it was interesting.
Hmm. It'd be interesting ―
111
00:06:00,080 --> 00:06:02,360
Yeah, so there you go.
once.
112
00:06:02,680 --> 00:06:05,160
Why only once?
We don't need millions
of them around the place.
113
00:06:05,160 --> 00:06:07,360
Well, that―
One of them in a zoo, and that's it.
114
00:06:07,360 --> 00:06:10,240
We could see a documentary on it
and leave it at that.
115
00:06:10,240 --> 00:06:13,240
Minogue?
What? I'm reading about slugs.
116
00:06:13,240 --> 00:06:17,480
It's quite interesting.
See, I didn't realise that slugs
actually have green blood.
117
00:06:17,480 --> 00:06:19,880
(MUFFLED SPEECH CONTINUES)
118
00:06:20,800 --> 00:06:22,800
(DOOR ALERT BUZZES)
119
00:06:23,160 --> 00:06:24,400
(SINISTER MUSIC)
120
00:06:24,400 --> 00:06:29,280
O'Leary.
Minogue, I-I thought you
were staying in the car.
121
00:06:29,280 --> 00:06:31,280
Classic O'Leary.
122
00:06:31,880 --> 00:06:34,480
How did you get in here before me?
123
00:06:34,480 --> 00:06:36,480
Mm. Interesting.
124
00:06:36,720 --> 00:06:39,360
It says, 'Slug, or land slug,
is a common name
125
00:06:39,360 --> 00:06:43,840
'for any apparently shell-less
terrestrial gastropod mollusc.'
(DOOR ALERT BUZZES)
126
00:06:43,840 --> 00:06:47,680
Wonder how they all lost
their shells. Sad, really.
127
00:06:47,680 --> 00:06:50,680
Certainly not optimal.
Just part of the job.
Well, I guess so.
128
00:06:50,680 --> 00:06:53,760
Still, if they had a shell, they'd
seem less gross. I can't touch them.
129
00:06:53,760 --> 00:06:56,040
Certainly not optimal.
Just part of the job.
130
00:06:56,040 --> 00:06:58,200
It's not optimal, certainly.
131
00:06:58,200 --> 00:07:00,080
You OK, O'Leary?
132
00:07:00,080 --> 00:07:02,080
(YELLS)
(ROARS)
133
00:07:02,640 --> 00:07:04,640
(ENGINE STARTS)
134
00:07:04,640 --> 00:07:07,440
(GRAVEL CRUNCHES, TYRES SQUEAL)
135
00:07:08,480 --> 00:07:10,960
Where's our car going?
Well, you took off with it.
136
00:07:10,960 --> 00:07:12,960
I was telling you some
interesting facts about slugs,
137
00:07:12,960 --> 00:07:15,080
and then you turned around and
looked at me with your pus-y face,
138
00:07:15,080 --> 00:07:18,360
and then I got out, and now
I'm here. What'd you do that for?
139
00:07:18,360 --> 00:07:20,880
N― Well, no, cos it wasn't me.
Huh?
140
00:07:20,880 --> 00:07:22,680
Well, I just met a copy
of you that wasn't dead.
141
00:07:22,680 --> 00:07:27,680
I think we've stumbled across
some sort of cloning scenario.
There are exact copies of us here.
142
00:07:27,680 --> 00:07:30,520
What did the exact
copy of me look like?
Well, looked like you.
143
00:07:30,520 --> 00:07:35,040
Handsome?
Kinda like a, you know, constantly
surprised Edmund Hillary. Like...
144
00:07:35,040 --> 00:07:38,240
But how do they know what
we look like? I've never been
to this town before,
145
00:07:38,240 --> 00:07:40,800
and I haven't got any friends
that do cloning that I know of.
146
00:07:40,800 --> 00:07:43,680
Maybe it's some sort
of Jurassic Park situation,
and they've got our DNA?
147
00:07:43,680 --> 00:07:46,000
They're makin' an
army of supercops,
148
00:07:46,000 --> 00:07:48,600
and they're usin' us
as the blueprint.
149
00:07:48,600 --> 00:07:52,160
Can you close that?
They're really tricky.
150
00:07:52,160 --> 00:07:53,920
Kia ora. Sergeant Maaka speaking.
151
00:07:53,920 --> 00:07:57,080
Kia ora, Sarge.
It's O'Leary here, from work.
SOFTLY: Say gidday from me.
152
00:07:57,080 --> 00:08:01,200
Ah, O'Leary.
How's it going over there?
Good. Um, Minogue says hi.
153
00:08:01,200 --> 00:08:04,120
Um, it's actually pretty, uh...
pretty peculiar here.
154
00:08:04,120 --> 00:08:06,800
We've identified some people
that look exactly like us, and―
155
00:08:06,800 --> 00:08:08,440
SOFTLY: Tell him my theory.
Hang on a sec.
156
00:08:08,440 --> 00:08:11,320
Uh, and to some degree,
they behave like us too.
Mm.
157
00:08:11,320 --> 00:08:12,960
Um...
Tell him my theory.
158
00:08:12,960 --> 00:08:15,360
What?
My theory about the...
159
00:08:15,480 --> 00:08:17,960
Yeah. Um, so, Minogue
does have a theory.
160
00:08:17,960 --> 00:08:22,840
Um, he thinks potentially
they've used our DNA to make
an army of supercops.
161
00:08:22,840 --> 00:08:26,360
SOFTLY: You gotta go up.
Sell it. 'Supercops!'
RISING INFLECTION: Su-Super cops.
162
00:08:26,360 --> 00:08:28,360
What, from you two?
163
00:08:28,560 --> 00:08:29,320
Hmm...
164
00:08:29,320 --> 00:08:32,160
Uh, apprehend those clones
and bring them into the station.
165
00:08:32,160 --> 00:08:35,920
Yeah, bringing them back's gonna
be a little bit, um... bit tricky,
166
00:08:35,920 --> 00:08:39,120
just because, um, they have―
See that?
167
00:08:39,120 --> 00:08:40,720
What?
See that?
No, I didn't.
168
00:08:40,720 --> 00:08:43,680
Um, they have actually
taken our patrol vehicle.
169
00:08:43,680 --> 00:08:46,720
OK. Uh, I'll be there
as soon as I can, OK?
170
00:08:46,720 --> 00:08:48,000
Copy that.
Sarge out.
171
00:08:48,000 --> 00:08:49,960
One, two, three, four, five, six,
seven, eight, nine, 10, 11...
Minogue―
172
00:08:49,960 --> 00:08:51,640
...12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18...
Minogue, what are you doing?
173
00:08:51,640 --> 00:08:54,160
Look, I know there's one of
the you's in here, so why don't
we just arrest that one?
174
00:08:54,160 --> 00:08:58,040
Well, I sort of feel like we should
arrest the you, because you were
the one that stole the car.
175
00:08:58,040 --> 00:08:59,760
Yeah, but she's gone in the car,...
Mm.
176
00:08:59,760 --> 00:09:02,800
...so why don't we just
arrest this one over―?
OK.
177
00:09:02,800 --> 00:09:04,800
(FLY BUZZES)
178
00:09:05,240 --> 00:09:07,760
You kinda look like...
Not optimal. Not optimal.
Not optimal.
179
00:09:07,760 --> 00:09:11,040
...her.
Classic O'Leary.
Not optimal.
180
00:09:11,840 --> 00:09:15,200
They're the originals.
Copy that.
Classic O'Leary.
181
00:09:15,200 --> 00:09:17,520
They must be detained.
They must be detained.
Classic O'Leary. Copy that.
182
00:09:17,520 --> 00:09:19,480
They said they're gonna detain us.
Right, we've gotta arrest one of
them.
183
00:09:19,480 --> 00:09:21,920
Not optimal. Not optimal.
I'm gonna arrest the me's;
you arrest the you's.
184
00:09:21,920 --> 00:09:24,400
Minogue, you're under arrest
for impersonating Minogue.
185
00:09:24,400 --> 00:09:27,200
Requesting assistance! (COUGHS)
Get it off, O'Leary!
186
00:09:27,200 --> 00:09:29,560
I'm trying! It won't move!
Get it off!
187
00:09:29,560 --> 00:09:33,360
(CHOKES)
Go that way, that way, that way.
That way, go! Go!
188
00:09:33,360 --> 00:09:35,920
You all right?
(PANTS) That is assaulting
a police officer.
189
00:09:35,920 --> 00:09:37,880
Yeah, well, it wasn't me.
No, I know it wasn't you.
It was the alien.
190
00:09:37,880 --> 00:09:39,480
It was the clone in
my name. It wasn't me.
I know.
191
00:09:39,480 --> 00:09:41,000
They are disrespecting
the uniform,...
Yeah.
192
00:09:41,000 --> 00:09:43,240
...and that was completely unsafe.
And you ― they were
disrespecting you,
193
00:09:43,240 --> 00:09:46,640
and he was disrespecting the
relationship that we've got,...
I know. It's outrageous.
194
00:09:46,640 --> 00:09:48,720
...because you might
be mad at me now.
195
00:09:48,720 --> 00:09:51,120
They are the originals.
They must be detained.
Copy that.
196
00:09:51,120 --> 00:09:52,600
What?
Copy that.
Not optimal.
197
00:09:52,600 --> 00:09:54,640
Listen, O'Leary.
Travelling. Copy that.
(SNARLS)
198
00:09:54,640 --> 00:09:56,560
Travelling!
Travelling!
What's your assessment, O'Leary?
199
00:09:56,560 --> 00:09:58,920
Um, I think we should run. Run. Run!
Copy that.
Copy that.
200
00:09:58,920 --> 00:10:00,400
Travelling!
(CLONE SNARLS)
201
00:10:00,400 --> 00:10:00,480
*
202
00:10:00,480 --> 00:10:02,480
(TENSE MUSIC)
203
00:10:06,480 --> 00:10:08,880
Come on, come on. Come on!
Come in. Quick, shut the door.
Shut the door!
204
00:10:08,880 --> 00:10:11,160
(DOOR SLIDES, SLAMS)
Can't believe I lost my cuffs.
Don't worry.
205
00:10:11,160 --> 00:10:13,840
You can get another pair.
Well, it comes out of my pay. That's
the third time that's happened.
206
00:10:13,840 --> 00:10:15,560
I'm gonna start wearing them
now so I don't lose them.
207
00:10:15,560 --> 00:10:17,800
Look, here's what
we're gonna do, OK? I'm gonna
write an M on your forehead;
208
00:10:17,800 --> 00:10:21,120
you write an O on mine. That way,
if we get split up, we'll know who
the real us are, OK?
209
00:10:21,120 --> 00:10:25,600
M for 'me', O for 'other copy'.
Minogue, O'Leary.
Copy.
210
00:10:25,600 --> 00:10:27,600
There you go.
211
00:10:28,880 --> 00:10:33,000
OK. Right, I'm gonna
ring Sarge. We need backup.
Oh, they got a spa pool.
212
00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:35,800
(KEYPAD TAPS)
And it's open 24 hours.
You know, most spas,
213
00:10:35,800 --> 00:10:38,240
they close at 10pm.
Sarge. Yeah, hi, Sarge.
214
00:10:38,240 --> 00:10:40,600
Yeah, it's me.
Say hi for me. Say hi for me.
Hey― Yeah, um, look―
215
00:10:40,600 --> 00:10:42,320
(CONNECTION CRACKLES)
Sarge?
216
00:10:42,320 --> 00:10:45,000
Sarge?
And it's got― They've got
three Sky channels as well.
217
00:10:45,025 --> 00:10:48,535
This place isn't bad actually
except the clones of us
are trying to kill us.
218
00:10:48,560 --> 00:10:52,600
Anyway, we've gotta
find a way out of here.
Check the window.
219
00:10:52,600 --> 00:10:55,920
MUFFLED: O'Leary?
No. No, that's not a good idea.
That's no good.
220
00:10:55,920 --> 00:10:57,800
OK, um...
That looks like the
worst place to go.
221
00:10:57,800 --> 00:11:00,760
Minogue, we need
to find a way out of here.
MUFFLED: Optimal. Optimal.
222
00:11:00,760 --> 00:11:03,240
Hmm.
MUFFLED: Copy that.
(GASPS)
223
00:11:03,240 --> 00:11:06,320
Thought that was
another one of them.
224
00:11:06,320 --> 00:11:08,320
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
225
00:11:09,680 --> 00:11:11,080
OK, the coast is clear.
226
00:11:11,080 --> 00:11:13,080
Minogue!
227
00:11:13,440 --> 00:11:15,360
Minogue?
MUFFLED: Optimal.
MUFFLED: Copy that.
228
00:11:15,360 --> 00:11:16,720
Minogue!
Copy that.
Optimal.
229
00:11:16,720 --> 00:11:18,360
Copy that.
Optimal.
Copy that.
230
00:11:18,360 --> 00:11:20,680
Copy that.
Minogue!
Optimal. Optimal.
231
00:11:20,680 --> 00:11:24,080
Not optimal.
O'Leary. Classic O'Leary.
232
00:11:24,080 --> 00:11:26,080
(BIRDS TWITTER)
233
00:11:26,880 --> 00:11:30,760
MUFFLED: That's so true.
(MUFFLED CHUCKLING)
234
00:11:30,880 --> 00:11:33,960
You got a great sense
of humour, Minogue.
Yeah. (CHUCKLES)
235
00:11:33,960 --> 00:11:37,160
O'Leary! Jump in.
Yeah, O'Leary, jump in.
Minogue?
236
00:11:37,160 --> 00:11:39,560
Well, you've both got M's on your
heads. How can I tell who's who?
237
00:11:39,560 --> 00:11:43,320
I'm the Minogue you know.
Well, why do you both have
an M on your heads?
238
00:11:43,320 --> 00:11:46,320
Because I put an M on his head.
Why would you do that?
239
00:11:46,320 --> 00:11:49,400
Cos it defeats the whole purpose
of why I put an M on your head
in the first place.
240
00:11:49,400 --> 00:11:52,080
Well, it's so I can see him in
a crowd, in case we get separated.
241
00:11:52,080 --> 00:11:55,480
I came down here to check
the spa out, we got to talking.
242
00:11:55,480 --> 00:11:58,720
Turns out we got a lot in common.
His M stands for 'mate'.
243
00:11:58,720 --> 00:12:01,600
Hey, this cloning business
is pretty interesting, right?
244
00:12:01,600 --> 00:12:05,400
You guys part of a new batch, or
have you been around for a while?
Oh. Um,
245
00:12:05,400 --> 00:12:08,080
ye-yeah― yeah, we're the new batch.
Really?
246
00:12:08,080 --> 00:12:10,520
You come out pretty good,
all things considered,
247
00:12:10,520 --> 00:12:14,000
cos a lot of the new
ones are a bit (SNARLS).
248
00:12:14,280 --> 00:12:18,000
We're gonna start a podcast.
It's called Two Minogues in a Spa.
249
00:12:18,000 --> 00:12:20,080
Or M1 and M2 Talk Rubbish.
250
00:12:20,200 --> 00:12:23,400
OK, so, um, what's our plan, again?
You know, from one clone to another?
251
00:12:23,400 --> 00:12:27,800
Well, no real plans. We
just take over country, I guess.
Oh, yeah. Take over the country.
252
00:12:27,800 --> 00:12:30,880
Can you just remind me again
how we're gonna do that?
Well, the normal way ―
253
00:12:30,880 --> 00:12:33,360
metamorphosising, cloning,
254
00:12:33,520 --> 00:12:35,640
infiltrate the major cities,
255
00:12:35,640 --> 00:12:38,120
take over the humans,
eat the humans.
256
00:12:38,120 --> 00:12:41,920
You never mentioned that, Minogue.
Yeah, we're gonna talk
about it in our podcast.
257
00:12:41,920 --> 00:12:44,880
Should be pretty easy, considering
we're totally indestructible.
258
00:12:44,880 --> 00:12:48,840
- Yeah.
- (BUBBLES GURGLE)
- Ooh. Scuse me. (CHUCKLES)
259
00:12:48,840 --> 00:12:52,440
Yep. (EXHALES)
No weaknesses whatsoever.
260
00:12:53,680 --> 00:12:55,680
Nothing can kill us.
261
00:12:56,600 --> 00:12:58,600
Nothin'!
262
00:12:59,120 --> 00:13:01,120
- (THUD!)
- (GROANS)
263
00:13:01,120 --> 00:13:04,400
Mate, help me!
What's happening, mate?
264
00:13:05,040 --> 00:13:07,600
I think I'm dying!
He says he's dying, O'Leary!
265
00:13:07,600 --> 00:13:10,280
Well, look, I'm― what
am I supposed to do about it?
(GURGLES, CHOKES)
266
00:13:10,280 --> 00:13:12,360
I don't know. Give
him mouth-to-mouth.
267
00:13:12,360 --> 00:13:13,880
But look ― can you see that?
What?
268
00:13:13,880 --> 00:13:17,160
Well, he's collapsed, and now, look,
the slugs are eating his body.
(GROANS) Help me!
269
00:13:17,160 --> 00:13:21,280
Slug got me! Slug!
Yeah, he's talkin'
about the slugs now.
270
00:13:21,280 --> 00:13:24,160
He's saying 'slugs'...
YELLS: Sluuu―!
271
00:13:24,160 --> 00:13:27,040
(GRUNTS)
Slugs. He's blamin' it on the slugs.
272
00:13:27,040 --> 00:13:29,680
I'd call that a fairly big weakness.
See, I think this is what happens
273
00:13:29,680 --> 00:13:33,080
when you're open 24 hours and you've
got no time to do spa maintenance.
274
00:13:33,080 --> 00:13:35,640
I just really feel like
spa maintenance is not
the bigger issue here.
275
00:13:35,640 --> 00:13:38,800
Well, I think the slugs come
in here, and they just treat
it like a home.
276
00:13:38,800 --> 00:13:40,920
You need to be able to get
in here and wash it down ―
277
00:13:40,920 --> 00:13:43,400
give it a hose and sweep it out.
278
00:13:43,960 --> 00:13:46,320
I mean, it's obviously, uh―
In policing, we never like
to see this kind of thing.
279
00:13:46,320 --> 00:13:50,200
Fatalities are never good, um,
no matter who is the deceased,
280
00:13:50,200 --> 00:13:52,480
but I think, end of
the day, um, this...
281
00:13:52,480 --> 00:13:58,080
this thing ― being, clone, what have
you ― um, certainly had bad intent,
282
00:13:58,080 --> 00:14:00,440
so... we're not
too worried about it.
283
00:14:00,440 --> 00:14:05,080
Personally, I've got mixed emotions.
Um, I've got mixed emotions.
Mixed?
284
00:14:05,080 --> 00:14:09,040
Sad to see him, um, dead,
cos he looks exactly like me,
285
00:14:09,040 --> 00:14:12,040
but also happy that he's gone, uh,
because he's actually an alien
286
00:14:12,065 --> 00:14:15,815
and was planning on wiping out
the real me, uh, and the real
O'Leary, I can only assume.
287
00:14:15,840 --> 00:14:17,720
Doesn't look like you
anymore. Look at him.
288
00:14:17,720 --> 00:14:21,120
He's a bit melty, isn't he?
It's grim.
Mm.
289
00:14:22,040 --> 00:14:23,640
Can I just suggest next time
you wanna have a spa,
290
00:14:23,640 --> 00:14:25,520
you do it when you're off-duty?
Sure.
291
00:14:25,520 --> 00:14:28,800
(DISTANT FOOTSTEPS RUMBLE)
Hey. Listen.
292
00:14:28,800 --> 00:14:31,480
(RUMBLING FOOTSTEPS APPROACH)
293
00:14:32,760 --> 00:14:34,760
What is that?
294
00:14:35,360 --> 00:14:38,320
That sounds like...
Copy that. Copy that.
295
00:14:38,320 --> 00:14:40,360
CLONES: Copy that. Copy that.
Copy that. Copy that. Copy that.
296
00:14:40,360 --> 00:14:42,200
WHISPERS: Where's the Taser?
Copy that. Copy that.
297
00:14:42,200 --> 00:14:44,120
In the car.
Oh God.
298
00:14:44,120 --> 00:14:46,200
Copy that. Copy that. Copy that.
What's this?
299
00:14:46,200 --> 00:14:48,200
O'Leary.
What?
300
00:14:48,600 --> 00:14:51,760
(CLEARS THROAT)
Whoa. OK, who's the real Minogue?
301
00:14:51,760 --> 00:14:54,520
ALL: I'm the real Minogue.
I'm a clone.
302
00:14:54,520 --> 00:14:56,680
Look, there's only one way to
find out who the real Minogue is.
303
00:14:56,680 --> 00:14:59,840
I'm gonna ask you a question
only the real Minogue would know.
When's your mum's birthday?
304
00:14:59,840 --> 00:15:02,040
MINOGUES: January 25th.
January 26.
305
00:15:02,040 --> 00:15:03,800
It's 26.
MINOGUES: January 26.
306
00:15:03,800 --> 00:15:06,800
January 26.
I think it's tw― Nah, it is,
it's 26. They were right.
307
00:15:06,800 --> 00:15:10,080
January 26.
Only the real Minogue would
forget his own mum's birthday.
308
00:15:10,080 --> 00:15:11,680
You, come here.
309
00:15:11,680 --> 00:15:13,200
Yes!
310
00:15:13,200 --> 00:15:16,280
O'Leary?
What?
Looks like a dead end.
311
00:15:16,600 --> 00:15:20,160
Correct.
I think we're gonna have
to fight the army of me.
312
00:15:20,160 --> 00:15:22,640
(STRANGLED ROAR IN DISTANCE)
313
00:15:22,640 --> 00:15:24,640
(TENSE MUSIC)
314
00:15:26,000 --> 00:15:28,000
(FOOTSTEPS RETREAT)
315
00:15:34,040 --> 00:15:37,680
Wouldn't we have a better chance if
we split up from the camera crew?
316
00:15:37,680 --> 00:15:39,440
Well, no, we've gotta
protect all New Zealanders.
317
00:15:39,440 --> 00:15:41,680
OK? They're with us. I mean―
Theoretically. Practically, it's―
They can hear you.
318
00:15:41,680 --> 00:15:42,840
They can hear you.
Yeah.
319
00:15:42,840 --> 00:15:45,640
WHISPERS: Hey, you guys all good?
320
00:15:46,120 --> 00:15:49,640
Stay close. I can't protect
you if you're too far away.
Where've they all gone?
321
00:15:49,640 --> 00:15:53,440
Ah, there you are. Sorry, guys,
I just made it now. Everything OK?
322
00:15:53,440 --> 00:15:55,760
There's... There's
dozens of them, Sarge.
Mm.
323
00:15:55,760 --> 00:15:58,680
They're freaky.
Yeah, and they seem,
you know, kinda dangerous.
324
00:15:58,680 --> 00:16:00,880
Right.
Quite dangerous.
Good-looking, though, half of them.
325
00:16:00,880 --> 00:16:03,560
I thought they'd be dangerous too,
not just good-looking,...
Mm.
326
00:16:03,560 --> 00:16:05,840
...but that's why I called
the Armed Offenders Squad.
327
00:16:05,840 --> 00:16:10,640
So they've sealed off the premises
and pushed the clones to the edge of
the area so they can be detained.
328
00:16:10,640 --> 00:16:12,760
We didn't notice them arrive
or anything like that, or...
329
00:16:12,760 --> 00:16:15,360
hear anything.
Well, probably in stealth
mode, something like that.
330
00:16:15,360 --> 00:16:18,560
(GLASS SHATTERS IN DISTANCE)
Well, that sounds like a property
damage in progress. Let's go.
331
00:16:18,560 --> 00:16:22,400
WHISPERS: Stealth mode.
We're in stealth mode. Stealth mode.
Stealth mode.
332
00:16:22,400 --> 00:16:25,920
(SHATTERED GLASS CLINKS)
Must've come from in there.
333
00:16:25,920 --> 00:16:28,720
(GUTTURAL MUTTERING, SNARLING)
334
00:16:29,440 --> 00:16:31,440
There's heaps of them.
Where's Sarge?
335
00:16:31,440 --> 00:16:33,880
Let's get outta here.
No, no. Where's Sarge? He's coming.
336
00:16:33,880 --> 00:16:35,800
Sarge.
Sarge.
It's a trap.
337
00:16:35,800 --> 00:16:38,200
Looks like some sort of a nest.
(CLEARS THROAT)
338
00:16:38,200 --> 00:16:42,240
All right, quiet, please, everyone.
Let me have your attention.
(MUTTERING SUBSIDES)
339
00:16:42,240 --> 00:16:44,240
Now, (CLEARS THROAT)
340
00:16:44,360 --> 00:16:47,560
I just wanted to say what
a good job everybody has done today.
341
00:16:47,560 --> 00:16:49,800
I think the cloning
has gone really well ―
342
00:16:49,800 --> 00:16:52,600
even though some of you still
look a little bit deformed,
343
00:16:52,600 --> 00:16:55,240
and maybe your communication
skills could use a bit of work.
(RASPS)
344
00:16:55,240 --> 00:16:57,920
But that's just the nature
of the beast, isn't it?
345
00:16:58,280 --> 00:17:00,520
Uh, our job is not yet done, though.
346
00:17:00,545 --> 00:17:06,255
I think the best way to adapt or
simulate the human lifestyle
is to study them...
347
00:17:06,280 --> 00:17:10,080
(HISSING, SNARLING)
...and then we eat them.
348
00:17:10,240 --> 00:17:12,440
Open it!
I can't! It's locked.
Take them to the cooler.
349
00:17:12,440 --> 00:17:15,120
It won't open!
(STRANGLED ROAR)
350
00:17:16,320 --> 00:17:19,000
(ROARING, SNARLING CONTINUES)
351
00:17:20,640 --> 00:17:22,640
*
352
00:17:22,800 --> 00:17:25,720
Sarge, what are you doin' in here?
(SQUELCHING, DOOR SHUTS)
353
00:17:25,720 --> 00:17:29,040
Hang on. How do we know
it's the real Sarge?
Yeah, how do we know?
354
00:17:29,040 --> 00:17:31,280
'Course it's me.
Don't be ridiculous.
355
00:17:31,280 --> 00:17:35,000
Hostile bunch of you guys took me
hostage. Then one that looked
like me took me hostage,
356
00:17:35,000 --> 00:17:37,520
threw me in this chiller
and took my hat.
357
00:17:37,520 --> 00:17:42,600
I think I know what's goin' on here,
guys. These aren't clones per se.
What d'you mean?
358
00:17:42,600 --> 00:17:45,480
(CELL PHONE UNLOCKS)
I'm about to show you
footage from a year ago,
359
00:17:45,480 --> 00:17:49,000
when we encountered those
alien plant life forms on the farm
just up the road from here.
360
00:17:49,000 --> 00:17:51,120
(KEYPAD TAPS)
OK, check this out.
361
00:17:51,120 --> 00:17:52,720
There's you guys. There's me,...
Yeah?
362
00:17:52,720 --> 00:17:55,560
...but I'd left moments earlier.
And see that tendril―?
363
00:17:55,560 --> 00:17:57,520
Yeah, freeze-frame.
(CLICK!)
364
00:17:57,520 --> 00:17:59,960
See that tendril there?
Dead giveaway.
365
00:17:59,960 --> 00:18:02,880
And there's you guys.
That's us.
Yup.
366
00:18:02,880 --> 00:18:04,600
Zoom back out.
But that's us.
367
00:18:04,600 --> 00:18:06,280
That's the real us.
That's us there.
Yeah.
368
00:18:06,280 --> 00:18:11,040
And we completely missed that.
Unbeknownst to us, they escaped,
all right, obviously,
369
00:18:11,040 --> 00:18:13,360
and took new forms ― our forms.
370
00:18:13,360 --> 00:18:17,040
Only now they've multiplied.
There's more of them.
371
00:18:17,040 --> 00:18:21,000
I feel like a fool.
Don't worry. It's a good
lesson for all of us.
372
00:18:21,000 --> 00:18:25,240
Anyway, we need to get outta here,
but we're locked in.
373
00:18:25,240 --> 00:18:27,240
(DOOR CREAKS)
374
00:18:28,240 --> 00:18:30,920
We're not locked in any more, Sarge.
Clone me probably forgot to lock it
375
00:18:30,920 --> 00:18:34,120
when he threw us in here.
That'd be typical.
376
00:18:34,120 --> 00:18:36,120
WHISPERS: OK, let's go.
377
00:18:36,120 --> 00:18:38,120
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
378
00:18:39,120 --> 00:18:41,120
(STRANGLED ROAR)
379
00:18:41,960 --> 00:18:44,160
Going somewhere, humans?
380
00:18:45,400 --> 00:18:47,400
(SNARLING)
381
00:18:48,200 --> 00:18:50,080
Hey, Sarge.
382
00:18:50,080 --> 00:18:52,080
Over here.
383
00:18:52,600 --> 00:18:54,600
Ju-jitsu?
384
00:18:54,840 --> 00:18:56,840
Ju-jitsu.
385
00:18:58,880 --> 00:19:00,880
(ROARS)
386
00:19:00,880 --> 00:19:02,880
(GRUNTING, SNARLING)
387
00:19:02,880 --> 00:19:04,880
(TENSE MUSIC)
388
00:19:07,000 --> 00:19:09,000
(SNARLS)
(GROANS)
389
00:19:10,920 --> 00:19:13,920
PANTS: Uh, he seems to be instantly
learning my ju-jitsu moves.
390
00:19:13,920 --> 00:19:16,320
(GRUNTING, SNARLING CONTINUES)
What are you doing?
391
00:19:16,320 --> 00:19:19,800
When I get nervous, I eat.
What?! Typical.
392
00:19:20,960 --> 00:19:22,880
MUFFLED: Well, don't take 'em!
Shh, shh.
393
00:19:22,880 --> 00:19:26,480
Sarge, try the slug!
(SNARLING CONTINUES)
394
00:19:26,520 --> 00:19:28,520
(SQUELCHING)
(GAGS)
395
00:19:29,320 --> 00:19:31,320
(RETCHES)
396
00:19:33,760 --> 00:19:38,520
(COUGHS) I'm-I'm all good, guys.
I'm all good. We're indestructible,
didn't you know?
397
00:19:38,520 --> 00:19:40,520
(RETCHES, COUGHS)
398
00:19:42,040 --> 00:19:44,640
(SNARLS)
(PANICKED SNARLING)
399
00:19:46,680 --> 00:19:49,640
Guys,...
Great work, Sarge.
...the slug is its natural enemy.
400
00:19:49,640 --> 00:19:52,640
We need to contain these
things, so arm yourselves.
(SQUELCHING)
401
00:19:52,640 --> 00:19:53,880
OK, let's go.
402
00:19:53,880 --> 00:19:55,200
Wait, wait.
403
00:19:55,200 --> 00:19:57,200
All right.
404
00:19:57,200 --> 00:19:59,200
(TENSE MUSIC)
405
00:20:10,880 --> 00:20:12,880
(PANICKED SNARLING)
406
00:20:14,720 --> 00:20:17,600
They're so gross.
Oh, I've got stitch. (GROANS)
407
00:20:17,600 --> 00:20:20,040
O'LEARY CLONE:
Wait for me, everybody!
408
00:20:20,040 --> 00:20:22,880
(DISTANT RUMBLING)
Uh, Sarge, we got a situation.
Yeah, what? What situation's that?
409
00:20:22,880 --> 00:20:25,560
Uh, it's a spaceship situation.
410
00:20:25,560 --> 00:20:28,160
(CLONES SNARL, BEAM BUZZES)
Travelling.
Copy that.
411
00:20:28,160 --> 00:20:29,240
Travelling.
Copy that.
412
00:20:29,240 --> 00:20:31,040
Travelling. Travelling.
What...?
413
00:20:31,040 --> 00:20:34,640
Copy that.
Copy that.
(SNARLING SUBSIDES)
414
00:20:34,760 --> 00:20:36,760
(SNARLS)
415
00:20:37,680 --> 00:20:39,960
(GRUNTS)
(PLAINTIVE MEOW)
416
00:20:39,960 --> 00:20:41,960
(SNARLS)
(WHIRRING)
417
00:20:42,240 --> 00:20:44,040
(WHIRRING INTENSIFIES)
418
00:20:44,040 --> 00:20:45,440
(DEAFENING BLAST)
419
00:20:45,440 --> 00:20:48,040
Take me with you.
420
00:20:48,320 --> 00:20:50,840
Why did you say, 'Take us with you'?
I― Uh, no, no. No, I was―
421
00:20:50,840 --> 00:20:54,320
Were you talking to us
or were you talking to them?
I was talking to myself.
422
00:20:54,320 --> 00:20:57,440
The threat has been contained,
and the alien, uh, plant people
423
00:20:57,440 --> 00:20:59,680
have been eradicated from
the face of the planet.
424
00:20:59,680 --> 00:21:05,200
Even so, you should still be on
the lookout for people exhibiting
strange repetitive behaviour.
425
00:21:05,200 --> 00:21:09,240
Mm. It just goes to show you can't
trust anyone in this line of work ―
even yourself.
426
00:21:09,240 --> 00:21:11,560
But if you do see anyone
that looks like us, uh,
427
00:21:11,560 --> 00:21:15,040
please do report it
directly to... us.
Mm.
428
00:21:15,080 --> 00:21:17,440
How will they know?
They have to make sure it's us.
429
00:21:17,440 --> 00:21:19,640
How will they know it's us?
430
00:21:20,200 --> 00:21:22,280
They'll, um...
Just ask.
431
00:21:22,800 --> 00:21:25,920
We're members of the
New Zealand Police Force,
and we have to be honest.
432
00:21:25,920 --> 00:21:27,920
Correct.
433
00:21:29,480 --> 00:21:32,360
('WELLINGTON PARANORMAL' THEME)
434
00:21:32,360 --> 00:21:36,640
Captions by Maeve Kelly.
Edited by Glenna Casalme.
435
00:21:36,640 --> 00:21:40,640
Captions were made with
the support of NZ On Air.
436
00:21:40,640 --> 00:21:43,720
www.able.co.nz
Copyright Able 2019
437
00:21:43,720 --> 00:21:45,720
(MUSIC CONTINUES)
37115
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish (Latin American)
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof