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1
00:00:00,806 --> 00:00:02,407
The American superstore.
2
00:00:03,015 --> 00:00:04,214
One-stop shopping
3
00:00:04,250 --> 00:00:07,518
for everything you could
ever want or need.
4
00:00:07,553 --> 00:00:09,253
Do you want to be thinner?
5
00:00:09,288 --> 00:00:11,322
Fatter?
6
00:00:11,357 --> 00:00:13,123
Happier?
7
00:00:13,159 --> 00:00:15,059
Sadder?
8
00:00:15,094 --> 00:00:17,561
Are you looking for friendship?
9
00:00:17,596 --> 00:00:19,530
Or solitude?
10
00:00:19,565 --> 00:00:21,498
Or even love?
11
00:00:21,534 --> 00:00:24,068
That's actually a cubic
zirconia knockoff.
12
00:00:24,103 --> 00:00:25,502
It's called PlastiClear.
13
00:00:25,538 --> 00:00:26,737
What happened to the $8 ones?
14
00:00:26,772 --> 00:00:28,405
We're all sold outof those, s.
15
00:00:28,441 --> 00:00:30,107
But this one's only $2 more.
16
00:00:30,142 --> 00:00:31,108
I get it.
17
00:00:31,143 --> 00:00:32,376
You advertise the cheap jewelry
18
00:00:32,411 --> 00:00:33,544
to get the suckers in the door,
19
00:00:33,579 --> 00:00:34,979
then you push the expensive stuff.
20
00:00:35,014 --> 00:00:36,580
Well, I wouldn't use
the word "suckers,"
21
00:00:36,615 --> 00:00:37,982
or "expensive,"
22
00:00:38,017 --> 00:00:39,416
or "jewelry."
23
00:00:40,987 --> 00:00:42,186
Fine.
24
00:00:42,221 --> 00:00:43,887
I got to stand in line
for cigarettes anyhow.
25
00:00:43,923 --> 00:00:45,089
Great.
26
00:00:45,124 --> 00:00:48,058
I hope you and your fiancée
are very happy together...
27
00:00:49,528 --> 00:00:51,362
And that you don't procreate.
28
00:00:51,397 --> 00:00:52,563
Glenn. Huh?
29
00:00:52,598 --> 00:00:54,231
I'm taking a mental-health break.
30
00:00:54,266 --> 00:00:56,934
Okay. Have fun now.
31
00:00:56,969 --> 00:00:58,902
Reflect.
32
00:00:58,938 --> 00:01:02,439
Just checking over your new hire forms.
33
00:01:02,475 --> 00:01:04,274
American citizen. Nice.
34
00:01:05,277 --> 00:01:06,310
No dependents.
35
00:01:06,345 --> 00:01:07,811
Me neither, unless you count my birds.
36
00:01:09,081 --> 00:01:10,914
It just doesn't say anywhere on here
37
00:01:10,950 --> 00:01:13,217
if you've got a girlfriend.
38
00:01:13,252 --> 00:01:14,918
I didn't... is there a space for that?
39
00:01:14,954 --> 00:01:15,986
There's this section here:
40
00:01:16,022 --> 00:01:17,554
"Is there anything
else we should know?"
41
00:01:17,590 --> 00:01:19,289
Some people like to volunteer it.
42
00:01:19,325 --> 00:01:22,126
Oh. Um... then also no.
43
00:01:22,161 --> 00:01:23,293
- No.
- No.
44
00:01:23,329 --> 00:01:26,330
Okay, well, I will just
jot that down, then.
45
00:01:26,365 --> 00:01:27,898
But you are heterosexual, right?
46
00:01:27,933 --> 00:01:30,367
Is... are you allowed to ask that?
47
00:01:30,403 --> 00:01:32,002
No.
48
00:01:36,142 --> 00:01:37,274
Smart.
49
00:01:37,309 --> 00:01:39,977
We always keep the best
rolls right in the middle.
50
00:01:41,280 --> 00:01:43,047
Oh, wait. No, no, no. Let
me help you with that.
51
00:01:43,082 --> 00:01:44,214
Oh, no, no, no. I'm fine.
52
00:01:44,250 --> 00:01:45,215
It's fine, I work here.
53
00:01:45,251 --> 00:01:46,316
It's, like, my...
54
00:01:46,352 --> 00:01:47,985
it's my job to help customers, so.
55
00:01:48,020 --> 00:01:49,486
You work here?
56
00:01:49,522 --> 00:01:50,554
Since when?
57
00:01:50,589 --> 00:01:51,755
Since right now.
58
00:01:51,791 --> 00:01:53,957
I'm... it's actually my first day.
59
00:01:53,993 --> 00:01:55,225
- Oh.
- I know.
60
00:01:55,261 --> 00:01:58,362
I don't seem like the kind of person
who would work in a place like this.
61
00:02:00,032 --> 00:02:01,732
Yeah, that's why I was so surprised.
62
00:02:01,767 --> 00:02:03,067
I was like, "What?"
63
00:02:03,102 --> 00:02:04,368
- "What?"
- "Him?"
64
00:02:04,403 --> 00:02:06,136
"What's he doing cleaning
up toilet paper?"
65
00:02:06,172 --> 00:02:08,038
I think it's because you just...
you have this
66
00:02:08,074 --> 00:02:11,241
very intelligent, educated,
more cultured quality,
67
00:02:11,277 --> 00:02:12,242
I mean, compared to...
68
00:02:12,278 --> 00:02:14,078
Yeah. Oh, hey.
69
00:02:14,113 --> 00:02:15,746
Look, I get that you're
complimenting me,
70
00:02:15,781 --> 00:02:17,414
but it might sound a
little condescending,
71
00:02:17,450 --> 00:02:18,415
so, you know...
72
00:02:18,451 --> 00:02:19,483
Oh, yeah, thanks.
73
00:02:19,518 --> 00:02:21,351
No, I wouldn't want to
sound condescending
74
00:02:21,387 --> 00:02:22,820
in front of somebody who works here.
75
00:02:22,855 --> 00:02:23,787
Right.
76
00:02:26,025 --> 00:02:27,891
Hey, can I run out for two minutes?
77
00:02:27,927 --> 00:02:29,193
This thing is kicking my bladder
78
00:02:29,228 --> 00:02:30,461
like it owes him money.
79
00:02:30,496 --> 00:02:32,062
Oh, you know what, I'm
actually not in charge...
80
00:02:32,098 --> 00:02:33,864
Yes, of course. I'll
take Carly off express.
81
00:02:33,899 --> 00:02:35,933
And Vivian can bag, so
take as long as you need.
82
00:02:35,968 --> 00:02:37,468
Ah, thanks.
83
00:02:41,540 --> 00:02:42,806
Little tip:
84
00:02:42,842 --> 00:02:44,508
don't let the other workers here
85
00:02:44,543 --> 00:02:46,376
know how much better than them you are.
86
00:02:46,412 --> 00:02:47,411
They hate that.
87
00:02:47,446 --> 00:02:49,046
I don't know why, maybe because
88
00:02:49,081 --> 00:02:50,714
it sounds condescending.
89
00:02:52,651 --> 00:02:53,684
Welcome.
90
00:02:56,922 --> 00:02:57,988
I'm...
91
00:03:00,326 --> 00:03:01,992
No, no, no, no!
92
00:03:06,565 --> 00:03:10,400
- sync and corrections by Caio -
- www.addic7ed.com -
93
00:03:10,436 --> 00:03:11,802
All right, campers, listen up.
94
00:03:11,837 --> 00:03:13,337
I've got an important announcement.
95
00:03:13,372 --> 00:03:16,373
This is your garden variety
generic decongestant.
96
00:03:16,408 --> 00:03:18,742
And this is crystal meth, okay?
97
00:03:18,777 --> 00:03:22,146
The tweakers use this to make this.
98
00:03:22,181 --> 00:03:25,082
So stop selling them this,
so they can't make this.
99
00:03:25,117 --> 00:03:27,551
That guy told me he had
a really bad cold.
100
00:03:27,586 --> 00:03:29,553
He was buying 35 boxes, Cheyenne.
101
00:03:29,588 --> 00:03:31,321
That should have been a red flag, okay?
102
00:03:31,357 --> 00:03:32,289
Use your noggin.
103
00:03:32,324 --> 00:03:34,224
Let's thank Dina
104
00:03:34,260 --> 00:03:35,859
for that helpful tip of the day.
105
00:03:35,895 --> 00:03:36,960
Thank you, Dina.
106
00:03:36,996 --> 00:03:38,262
Am I the only one that
thinks it's weird
107
00:03:38,297 --> 00:03:39,897
that she walking around
with a bag of crystal meth?
108
00:03:39,932 --> 00:03:41,064
Hey, listen.
109
00:03:41,100 --> 00:03:43,333
I... I think there might have
been a misunderstanding.
110
00:03:43,369 --> 00:03:45,369
I'm not an elitist, so...
111
00:03:45,404 --> 00:03:47,871
Oh, elitist? What is that?
112
00:03:47,907 --> 00:03:50,140
Like, a person who thinks
their better than...
113
00:03:50,176 --> 00:03:52,409
You know what elitist means.
114
00:03:52,444 --> 00:03:53,710
Oh, yeah.
115
00:03:53,746 --> 00:03:55,679
They learnt that to
us in public school.
116
00:03:55,714 --> 00:03:58,382
Anyway, I am so proud
117
00:03:58,417 --> 00:04:03,654
to welcome two new angels
to our Cloud 9 family.
118
00:04:03,689 --> 00:04:05,822
Why don't you introduce yourselves?
119
00:04:05,858 --> 00:04:07,024
Okay.
120
00:04:07,059 --> 00:04:08,325
Hello, everyone.
121
00:04:08,360 --> 00:04:10,561
I am Jonah.
122
00:04:10,596 --> 00:04:12,729
And I am... I am excited to be here.
123
00:04:12,765 --> 00:04:14,398
This is gonna be fun, so...
124
00:04:14,433 --> 00:04:17,768
My name is Mateo
Fernando Aquino Liwanag,
125
00:04:17,803 --> 00:04:20,170
and I'm here to make
something of myself.
126
00:04:20,206 --> 00:04:21,738
♪ Spread my wings ♪
127
00:04:21,774 --> 00:04:22,940
Whoo!
128
00:04:22,975 --> 00:04:24,808
See how far I can fly.
129
00:04:24,843 --> 00:04:27,110
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
130
00:04:27,146 --> 00:04:31,181
Yeah, I, too, would like
to see how far I can fly.
131
00:04:32,918 --> 00:04:35,219
So...
132
00:04:35,254 --> 00:04:36,553
- Saved it.
- Thank you.
133
00:04:36,589 --> 00:04:39,690
Now, I used to end these meetings
134
00:04:39,725 --> 00:04:42,226
with some wisdom from the Good Book.
135
00:04:42,261 --> 00:04:44,361
But then someone reported
me to corporate.
136
00:04:44,396 --> 00:04:45,629
Heck yeah, I did.
137
00:04:45,664 --> 00:04:47,931
Look, I'm a Christian too,
but in these four walls,
138
00:04:47,967 --> 00:04:50,267
my bible is the employee
code of conduct.
139
00:04:50,302 --> 00:04:51,635
We all thank you for it.
140
00:04:51,670 --> 00:04:53,103
Yeah, you're welcome.
141
00:04:53,138 --> 00:04:54,104
I pray for you, Dina.
142
00:04:54,139 --> 00:04:55,172
I pray for you, too, Glenn.
143
00:04:55,207 --> 00:04:56,373
No, I'm praying right now.
144
00:04:56,408 --> 00:04:57,674
I'm praying so hard.
145
00:04:57,710 --> 00:04:58,842
I'm praying harder than you.
146
00:04:58,877 --> 00:04:59,843
I know how.
147
00:04:59,878 --> 00:05:02,713
So to welcome our new employees...
148
00:05:05,618 --> 00:05:06,550
Welcome.
149
00:05:06,585 --> 00:05:08,652
Welcome to Cloud 9.
150
00:05:08,687 --> 00:05:10,587
This is my jam.
151
00:05:15,728 --> 00:05:17,427
Hey, do we have any kind of training?
152
00:05:17,463 --> 00:05:18,428
I've just been wandering
153
00:05:18,464 --> 00:05:19,730
from one department to another,
154
00:05:19,765 --> 00:05:21,465
trying to look like I have purpose.
155
00:05:21,500 --> 00:05:24,101
It works better if you carry a box.
156
00:05:24,136 --> 00:05:25,068
There you go. See?
157
00:05:25,104 --> 00:05:26,136
You'll learn as you go.
158
00:05:26,171 --> 00:05:28,438
Look, man, only a couple
things to remember:
159
00:05:28,474 --> 00:05:31,008
always show up on time, don't steal,
160
00:05:31,043 --> 00:05:33,010
and stay on the floor
supervisor's good side.
161
00:05:33,045 --> 00:05:35,379
The fl... who's the floor supervisor?
162
00:05:39,752 --> 00:05:41,385
I got to go get another box.
163
00:05:43,689 --> 00:05:46,223
Hey, can we... can we start over?
164
00:05:46,258 --> 00:05:48,625
I'm... Jonah, as you know.
165
00:05:48,661 --> 00:05:49,993
And you're Ramona.
166
00:05:50,029 --> 00:05:51,595
Nope, that is not my name.
167
00:05:51,630 --> 00:05:53,830
I just don't like random
strangers using my name
168
00:05:53,866 --> 00:05:54,865
like we're buddies.
169
00:05:54,900 --> 00:05:56,466
Right, like how hookers
170
00:05:56,502 --> 00:05:58,402
don't like to be kissed on the lips.
171
00:05:58,437 --> 00:06:00,437
Did you just compare me to a hooker?
172
00:06:01,540 --> 00:06:02,606
No.
173
00:06:02,641 --> 00:06:03,740
You look bored.
174
00:06:03,776 --> 00:06:04,941
Let me help you with that.
175
00:06:04,977 --> 00:06:07,611
All electronics are
supposed to be 25% off,
176
00:06:07,646 --> 00:06:09,146
but our POS system is down.
177
00:06:09,181 --> 00:06:12,649
So you scan, hit "reassign,"
178
00:06:12,685 --> 00:06:14,551
"enter," "override, yes,"
179
00:06:14,586 --> 00:06:17,220
"reduce 0.25," "enter, yes, yes."
180
00:06:17,256 --> 00:06:18,355
You are not paying attention.
181
00:06:18,390 --> 00:06:19,356
I'm sorry. Go ahead.
182
00:06:19,391 --> 00:06:21,458
"Confirm," "enter, yes." Got it?
183
00:06:21,493 --> 00:06:22,426
If I guessed your name,
184
00:06:22,461 --> 00:06:23,660
would you tell me if I was right?
185
00:06:25,864 --> 00:06:27,731
Take this.
186
00:06:27,766 --> 00:06:29,833
Oh, it's so pretty!
187
00:06:29,868 --> 00:06:31,435
I'll make a list.
188
00:06:32,638 --> 00:06:34,304
Oh, excuse me, miss.
189
00:06:34,340 --> 00:06:35,372
Do you know the difference
190
00:06:35,407 --> 00:06:37,007
between a stool softener
and a laxative?
191
00:06:37,042 --> 00:06:38,241
I'll be right with you, ma'am.
192
00:06:38,277 --> 00:06:39,609
Cheyenne, what's going on?
193
00:06:39,645 --> 00:06:41,945
My boyfriend just asked
me to marry him.
194
00:06:41,980 --> 00:06:43,080
I don't want it soft.
195
00:06:43,115 --> 00:06:45,449
I want it out of me.
196
00:06:45,484 --> 00:06:47,351
You know, I hadn't realized earlier
197
00:06:47,386 --> 00:06:49,486
that Cheyenne was the lucky
girl you'd be proposing to.
198
00:06:49,521 --> 00:06:50,654
Yeah, well, I knocked her up,
199
00:06:50,689 --> 00:06:51,621
so my dad says I have to.
200
00:06:52,624 --> 00:06:53,790
So romantic.
201
00:06:53,826 --> 00:06:54,958
That's how I do it, yo.
202
00:06:54,993 --> 00:06:56,093
100% love.
203
00:06:56,128 --> 00:06:57,561
Bulking agent?
204
00:06:57,596 --> 00:06:58,829
Why would I want more bulk?
205
00:06:58,864 --> 00:06:59,863
Ugh.
206
00:06:59,898 --> 00:07:03,266
Chey, you didn't say yes, did you?
207
00:07:03,302 --> 00:07:05,202
Why wouldn't I say yes?
208
00:07:05,237 --> 00:07:06,336
Um...
209
00:07:07,940 --> 00:07:09,406
Cheyenne, look at me.
210
00:07:09,441 --> 00:07:12,943
I know how easy it is to
get swept up in the...
211
00:07:12,978 --> 00:07:15,345
romance of all of... this.
212
00:07:15,381 --> 00:07:16,980
But...
213
00:07:17,015 --> 00:07:19,516
think it through, okay?
214
00:07:19,551 --> 00:07:21,051
Don't do something you're gonna regret
215
00:07:21,086 --> 00:07:22,586
for the rest of your life.
216
00:07:24,323 --> 00:07:25,655
Yeah, okay.
217
00:07:25,691 --> 00:07:28,024
I'm gonna go sleep on it.
218
00:07:36,802 --> 00:07:37,734
Hey.
219
00:07:37,770 --> 00:07:39,202
I think I got it down.
220
00:07:39,238 --> 00:07:41,738
No offense, but you're my competition,
221
00:07:41,774 --> 00:07:44,174
so I'm kind of actually
rooting for you to fail.
222
00:07:44,209 --> 00:07:45,509
Okay, thanks. Bye.
223
00:07:49,415 --> 00:07:51,314
Hey!
224
00:07:51,350 --> 00:07:53,550
I figured it out.
225
00:08:00,192 --> 00:08:02,125
We need new shelf flags
for the end caps,
226
00:08:02,161 --> 00:08:03,727
but we should check the DCPis first,
227
00:08:03,762 --> 00:08:04,895
because last time...
228
00:08:04,930 --> 00:08:07,330
What is happening?
229
00:08:07,366 --> 00:08:08,965
Could it be a race riot?
230
00:08:09,001 --> 00:08:12,035
It's so hard to tell
in the early stages.
231
00:08:12,070 --> 00:08:14,070
Could be the rapture,
232
00:08:14,106 --> 00:08:15,806
but then why am I still here?
233
00:08:18,410 --> 00:08:19,476
Hey.
234
00:08:19,511 --> 00:08:21,077
I am killing it over here.
235
00:08:21,113 --> 00:08:23,647
You're only discounting
everything 25%, right?
236
00:08:23,682 --> 00:08:26,583
Yeah, "scan, "reassign,"
"yes," "override,"
237
00:08:26,618 --> 00:08:27,584
"yes," "reprice..."
238
00:08:27,619 --> 00:08:29,486
- Reduce.
- Huh?
239
00:08:29,521 --> 00:08:30,620
Reduce 0.25.
240
00:08:30,656 --> 00:08:31,988
Reprice 0.25?
241
00:08:32,024 --> 00:08:34,057
That would change everything to 25¢.
242
00:08:40,332 --> 00:08:42,132
Shut it down!
243
00:08:42,167 --> 00:08:44,234
Shut it all down!
244
00:08:50,225 --> 00:08:52,960
If you sign up for our Heavenly
Shoppers program today,
245
00:08:52,995 --> 00:08:54,862
you'll save 15% off your purchase,
246
00:08:54,897 --> 00:08:57,064
which would drop your price to 22¢.
247
00:08:57,099 --> 00:08:58,499
Stop selling everything!
248
00:08:58,534 --> 00:08:59,500
Shut it down!
249
00:08:59,535 --> 00:09:00,534
Shut it all down!
250
00:09:00,569 --> 00:09:01,902
Sir, you need to stay right there.
251
00:09:01,937 --> 00:09:03,504
Frank, nobody leaves!
252
00:09:03,539 --> 00:09:05,639
Ma'am! Ma'am, I'm sorry.
253
00:09:05,674 --> 00:09:07,441
I'm gonna need to recheck
some of these items.
254
00:09:07,476 --> 00:09:08,675
No thank you, buh-bye.
255
00:09:08,711 --> 00:09:10,144
I'm sorry, I can't just let you leave
256
00:09:10,179 --> 00:09:11,879
with a whole basket full of 25¢ tech...
257
00:09:11,914 --> 00:09:13,047
Ow!
258
00:09:13,082 --> 00:09:14,581
I have more where that came from, lady!
259
00:09:14,617 --> 00:09:15,749
Oh, I don't think so!
260
00:09:17,119 --> 00:09:18,385
Attention, shoppers.
261
00:09:18,421 --> 00:09:20,020
Due to an employee error,
262
00:09:20,056 --> 00:09:21,922
very expensive electronics
263
00:09:21,957 --> 00:09:23,857
are pricing out at 25¢.
264
00:09:23,893 --> 00:09:26,026
This mistake is being corrected, so...
265
00:09:26,062 --> 00:09:27,127
stock up quick!
266
00:09:27,163 --> 00:09:28,395
Go, go, go, go!
267
00:09:28,431 --> 00:09:30,831
What I'm trying to say
is, this is not 25¢.
268
00:09:32,568 --> 00:09:33,667
Sir, no...
269
00:09:34,737 --> 00:09:35,903
No two-five, no.
270
00:09:35,938 --> 00:09:38,705
It touched my car; it's mine!
271
00:09:38,741 --> 00:09:40,674
- That's not a thing.
- It is a thing.
272
00:09:40,709 --> 00:09:42,543
I don't want to be "that guy,"
273
00:09:42,578 --> 00:09:45,913
but if you had to compare my
performance versus Jonah...
274
00:09:45,948 --> 00:09:48,682
Uh, okay.
275
00:09:48,717 --> 00:09:50,117
Yeah, you better hurry up, girl.
276
00:09:50,152 --> 00:09:51,785
You better get that TV.
277
00:09:51,821 --> 00:09:54,154
Stop, stop! Please, I'm begging you!
278
00:09:54,190 --> 00:09:56,223
She's very... she's...
they're very pretty, yep.
279
00:09:56,258 --> 00:09:58,092
Ow! Frank!
280
00:09:58,127 --> 00:09:59,259
Y'all don't want to do this.
281
00:09:59,295 --> 00:10:00,494
Please!
282
00:10:01,497 --> 00:10:03,831
Sale's over!
283
00:10:03,866 --> 00:10:06,700
There's no need to identify
284
00:10:06,735 --> 00:10:08,669
whoever it is
285
00:10:08,704 --> 00:10:10,771
whose fault this was.
286
00:10:10,806 --> 00:10:12,673
We can all learn a lesson here.
287
00:10:12,708 --> 00:10:14,174
Would that lesson be not letting Jonah
288
00:10:14,210 --> 00:10:15,976
reprice inventory in the future?
289
00:10:16,912 --> 00:10:18,512
It might be, yes.
290
00:10:18,547 --> 00:10:21,048
All right. Punctuality.
291
00:10:21,083 --> 00:10:22,816
I do not tolerate it,
292
00:10:22,852 --> 00:10:25,185
because I do not tolerate it in myself.
293
00:10:25,221 --> 00:10:26,753
I am an angry man, so
I get places early...
294
00:10:26,789 --> 00:10:28,522
Hey...
295
00:10:28,557 --> 00:10:31,625
do they allow employees
to date supervisors?
296
00:10:31,660 --> 00:10:33,894
I don't know. Why?
297
00:10:33,929 --> 00:10:35,062
Just curious.
298
00:10:35,097 --> 00:10:36,230
Let's always remember,
299
00:10:36,265 --> 00:10:38,499
the customer is always right.
300
00:10:44,940 --> 00:10:48,308
Hey, what's-your-name, check it out.
301
00:10:49,545 --> 00:10:51,011
Ah.
302
00:10:51,046 --> 00:10:52,546
I was wondering what was taking so long
303
00:10:52,581 --> 00:10:53,914
to stack a few cans.
304
00:10:53,949 --> 00:10:56,383
I just... I wanted to reiterate
305
00:10:56,418 --> 00:10:58,185
how sorry I am about before.
306
00:10:58,220 --> 00:11:00,921
And when a customer wants
a can of ginger root beer
307
00:11:00,956 --> 00:11:02,756
and the whole thing
collapses on top of them,
308
00:11:02,791 --> 00:11:04,658
how are you gonna feel then?
309
00:11:07,096 --> 00:11:08,629
I was just trying to have some fun.
310
00:11:08,664 --> 00:11:10,931
This might be a cultural
thing, but around here,
311
00:11:10,966 --> 00:11:13,000
the less screwing everything
up you do, the better.
312
00:11:13,035 --> 00:11:14,935
You talking about the cans
or the pricing thing?
313
00:11:14,970 --> 00:11:16,603
You see, the fact that
it's your first day
314
00:11:16,639 --> 00:11:18,172
and there's already
more than one option
315
00:11:18,207 --> 00:11:19,873
of things you screwed
up is not a good thing.
316
00:11:19,909 --> 00:11:21,475
Okay, I've made some mistakes.
317
00:11:21,510 --> 00:11:23,010
I can admit that, but that doesn't mean
318
00:11:23,045 --> 00:11:25,078
we can't have a little
fun at work, does it?
319
00:11:25,114 --> 00:11:26,580
Or try and find some moments of beauty
320
00:11:26,615 --> 00:11:27,581
in the everyday?
321
00:11:27,616 --> 00:11:29,149
Wait, I'm sorry.
322
00:11:29,185 --> 00:11:31,451
Did you really just use the
phrase "moments of beauty,"
323
00:11:31,487 --> 00:11:32,920
like, conversationally?
324
00:11:32,955 --> 00:11:35,155
Okay, yes, that's cheesy, but...
325
00:11:35,191 --> 00:11:37,758
Do you remember "American Beauty"?
326
00:11:37,793 --> 00:11:40,727
Even a plastic bag can be breathtaking.
327
00:11:46,402 --> 00:11:47,434
Wow.
328
00:11:47,469 --> 00:11:49,403
That really blew my mind.
329
00:11:49,438 --> 00:11:50,404
Like...
330
00:11:51,774 --> 00:11:53,307
I have goose bumps.
331
00:11:53,342 --> 00:11:55,375
I felt something.
332
00:11:57,680 --> 00:11:58,645
I'm Jonah.
333
00:11:58,681 --> 00:12:00,214
It's my first day.
334
00:12:09,592 --> 00:12:12,192
Okay. Stay still.
335
00:12:12,228 --> 00:12:14,161
I don't usually wear eyeliner.
336
00:12:14,196 --> 00:12:15,896
Sharpie occasionally, but...
337
00:12:15,931 --> 00:12:18,999
So tell me about this special guy.
338
00:12:19,034 --> 00:12:20,234
Okay.
339
00:12:20,269 --> 00:12:21,935
Male, Caucasian,
340
00:12:21,971 --> 00:12:25,105
no discernible scars or tattoos.
341
00:12:25,140 --> 00:12:27,274
Sounds dreamy.
342
00:12:27,309 --> 00:12:28,842
Yeah.
343
00:12:28,877 --> 00:12:30,444
You know, speaking of boys,
344
00:12:30,479 --> 00:12:32,346
I've got a pretty big decision to make.
345
00:12:32,381 --> 00:12:33,847
My boyfriend, he...
346
00:12:33,882 --> 00:12:35,682
I'm glad we could bond like this.
347
00:12:37,019 --> 00:12:38,652
Thank you.
348
00:12:41,156 --> 00:12:42,222
Excuse me, excuse me!
349
00:12:42,258 --> 00:12:43,490
Hi!
350
00:12:43,525 --> 00:12:45,492
I hung up everything that
was in the dressing rooms,
351
00:12:45,527 --> 00:12:47,527
and I organized it by
style, color, size,
352
00:12:47,563 --> 00:12:49,329
and relevance of designer.
353
00:12:49,365 --> 00:12:51,665
Wow. Good job.
354
00:12:51,700 --> 00:12:53,233
I enjoy hard work.
355
00:12:53,269 --> 00:12:54,568
It's just like my mom always said:
356
00:12:54,603 --> 00:12:57,004
"If you don't work hard,
Baby Jesus will cry."
357
00:12:57,039 --> 00:12:58,071
Okay.
358
00:12:58,107 --> 00:12:59,239
I don't think I could be happy
359
00:12:59,275 --> 00:13:00,574
fooling around in the parking lot
360
00:13:00,609 --> 00:13:02,309
like the other new guy.
361
00:13:02,344 --> 00:13:03,777
Slow down! This is not fair!
362
00:13:03,812 --> 00:13:06,146
You have more experience
on wheels than I do!
363
00:13:06,181 --> 00:13:08,515
Your disability is not my concern!
364
00:13:08,550 --> 00:13:10,484
Seriously?
365
00:13:10,519 --> 00:13:13,253
The only thing I asked you to
do was put the carts away.
366
00:13:13,289 --> 00:13:14,321
That's what I'm doing,
367
00:13:14,356 --> 00:13:16,923
just somewhat circuitously.
368
00:13:16,959 --> 00:13:18,759
See you later, sucka!
369
00:13:18,794 --> 00:13:20,927
Are you trying to get fired?
370
00:13:20,963 --> 00:13:22,229
What if Glenn sees this?
371
00:13:22,264 --> 00:13:24,331
Coming through!
372
00:13:24,366 --> 00:13:26,133
Move!
373
00:13:26,168 --> 00:13:27,401
That doesn't count.
374
00:13:27,436 --> 00:13:29,303
Go, Glenn! Yeah!
375
00:13:29,338 --> 00:13:31,471
Yeah! Yes!
376
00:13:31,507 --> 00:13:32,973
In your faces!
377
00:13:33,008 --> 00:13:34,274
Your faces!
378
00:13:34,310 --> 00:13:35,609
Ha-ha!
379
00:13:35,644 --> 00:13:37,477
Okay. I get it.
380
00:13:37,513 --> 00:13:38,578
You're the fun guy.
381
00:13:38,614 --> 00:13:39,780
I'm the stick in the mud.
382
00:13:39,815 --> 00:13:40,814
Well, I could be fun.
383
00:13:40,849 --> 00:13:42,115
I could have fun; let's have fun.
384
00:13:42,151 --> 00:13:43,216
Of course you can have fun.
385
00:13:43,252 --> 00:13:44,251
Whoo!
386
00:13:44,286 --> 00:13:46,920
We're playing at work.
387
00:13:46,955 --> 00:13:47,921
No brakes!
388
00:13:47,956 --> 00:13:48,922
I have no brakes!
389
00:13:48,957 --> 00:13:50,324
No... ooh!
390
00:14:03,629 --> 00:14:05,062
Peace offering.
391
00:14:05,098 --> 00:14:06,397
Are those the flowers
392
00:14:06,433 --> 00:14:08,433
that I picked up off the
floor of the garden center?
393
00:14:08,679 --> 00:14:09,744
Yes.
394
00:14:11,481 --> 00:14:13,348
They're beautiful trash flowers.
395
00:14:15,485 --> 00:14:17,485
Look, I'm sorry, okay?
396
00:14:17,521 --> 00:14:20,455
I have been having a long day.
397
00:14:20,490 --> 00:14:23,224
Ten years of long days, actually.
398
00:14:26,163 --> 00:14:30,065
You know, I stock these glow stars
399
00:14:30,100 --> 00:14:33,001
every single year for the
back-to-school sale.
400
00:14:33,036 --> 00:14:34,636
And then I take them down,
401
00:14:34,671 --> 00:14:37,005
and I put up the Halloween inventory,
402
00:14:37,040 --> 00:14:38,740
and then Thanksgiving and Christmas
403
00:14:38,775 --> 00:14:41,309
and Valentine's Day and Easter
404
00:14:41,344 --> 00:14:42,811
and Fourth of July,
405
00:14:42,846 --> 00:14:45,280
and then back-to-school again.
406
00:14:45,315 --> 00:14:46,548
Hmm.
407
00:14:46,583 --> 00:14:49,384
That sounds incredibly not fun.
408
00:14:49,419 --> 00:14:51,486
I see why you love it here.
409
00:14:51,521 --> 00:14:54,089
It's a good job.
410
00:14:54,124 --> 00:14:56,691
But tomorrow is gonna
be just like today,
411
00:14:56,727 --> 00:14:57,792
and I know that
412
00:14:57,828 --> 00:15:00,528
because today is just like yesterday.
413
00:15:00,564 --> 00:15:03,932
So... sometimes...
414
00:15:03,967 --> 00:15:06,768
it's just kind of hard to
find those moments of beauty.
415
00:15:19,416 --> 00:15:21,116
Attention, shoppers.
416
00:15:21,151 --> 00:15:22,984
Even a big box store has to close,
417
00:15:23,019 --> 00:15:24,552
and it's about that time.
418
00:15:24,588 --> 00:15:27,422
You know, when Pandora
closed her famous box,
419
00:15:27,457 --> 00:15:31,059
there was only one thing
left inside: hope.
420
00:15:31,094 --> 00:15:34,496
I wonder what will be
left inside of this box.
421
00:15:34,531 --> 00:15:37,565
Could it be grace?
422
00:15:37,601 --> 00:15:38,566
I hope not.
423
00:15:38,602 --> 00:15:39,701
If you're Grace's parents,
424
00:15:39,736 --> 00:15:42,637
please pick her up at customer service.
425
00:15:42,672 --> 00:15:44,172
I took the initiative upon myself
426
00:15:44,207 --> 00:15:45,507
to reorganize the toy section
427
00:15:45,542 --> 00:15:47,041
for the convenience of adult shoppers.
428
00:15:47,077 --> 00:15:48,576
It was just feeling overly whimsical.
429
00:15:48,612 --> 00:15:50,545
I want to show you something
I've been working on.
430
00:15:50,580 --> 00:15:52,247
Oh. You were working. Where?
431
00:15:52,282 --> 00:15:54,015
Because I've been in
every single department,
432
00:15:54,050 --> 00:15:55,550
and I haven't seen you
in a couple hours,
433
00:15:55,585 --> 00:15:57,352
unless you were in, like,
the break room maybe.
434
00:15:57,387 --> 00:16:00,388
Everybody get down on the ground, now!
435
00:16:01,424 --> 00:16:03,158
Get down, get down, get down!
436
00:16:03,193 --> 00:16:04,759
Touch the ground!
437
00:16:04,795 --> 00:16:06,494
Or get out!
438
00:16:06,530 --> 00:16:08,329
All right, calm down.
439
00:16:08,365 --> 00:16:10,098
Do what I say, and nobody gets hurt.
440
00:16:10,133 --> 00:16:11,533
This is what I trained for.
441
00:16:11,568 --> 00:16:13,635
Now, I'm gonna start killing
somebody every minute,
442
00:16:13,670 --> 00:16:15,770
unless...
443
00:16:15,806 --> 00:16:18,006
unless you agree to marry me, Cheyenne.
444
00:16:18,041 --> 00:16:18,973
Hit it!
445
00:16:19,009 --> 00:16:19,974
Hey, what the?
446
00:16:20,010 --> 00:16:21,810
Oh!
447
00:16:36,393 --> 00:16:38,593
I had nothing to do with this.
448
00:16:38,628 --> 00:16:40,762
Yeah, I know.
449
00:16:40,797 --> 00:16:42,897
This is the fault of YouTube.
450
00:16:48,071 --> 00:16:50,004
♪ Heard you want to
walk down the aisle ♪
451
00:16:52,609 --> 00:16:54,475
♪ All right, I pay the
consequences of my actions ♪
452
00:16:56,880 --> 00:16:57,812
Yo!
453
00:16:57,848 --> 00:16:59,414
What a show.
454
00:16:59,449 --> 00:17:01,316
I'm calling to report a
code green in progress.
455
00:17:01,351 --> 00:17:02,283
I repeat, code green.
456
00:17:02,319 --> 00:17:03,384
What's a code green?
457
00:17:03,420 --> 00:17:04,886
I faxed you a list of codes last month!
458
00:17:04,921 --> 00:17:06,120
Hostage situation!
459
00:17:06,156 --> 00:17:07,789
You need to get SWAT
down here right now!
460
00:17:12,729 --> 00:17:14,662
Yo, #BlackLivesMatter, y'all.
461
00:17:16,032 --> 00:17:17,665
Okay, if you like what
you heard and saw,
462
00:17:17,701 --> 00:17:20,301
I'm currently seeking
representation in all areas.
463
00:17:20,337 --> 00:17:21,603
Also, I do modeling,
464
00:17:21,638 --> 00:17:23,137
so I'm just throwing that out there.
465
00:17:23,173 --> 00:17:25,240
All right, peace out, St. Louis.
466
00:17:25,275 --> 00:17:26,407
M-m-murr!
467
00:17:26,443 --> 00:17:28,243
- Bo.
- What?
468
00:17:28,278 --> 00:17:30,178
Oh, my bad, yo.
469
00:17:33,083 --> 00:17:35,250
Cheyenne Tyler Lee,
470
00:17:35,285 --> 00:17:37,185
will you marry me?
471
00:17:37,220 --> 00:17:39,921
Or are you gonna be,
like, a dick about it?
472
00:17:39,956 --> 00:17:41,856
Oh, I think he's about
to shoot a hostage.
473
00:17:41,892 --> 00:17:43,658
- I'll do what I can.
- Don't do anything.
474
00:17:50,233 --> 00:17:52,467
What is this?
475
00:18:05,382 --> 00:18:06,748
Moment of beauty?
476
00:18:16,059 --> 00:18:18,326
To Cheyenne.
477
00:18:18,361 --> 00:18:19,494
Cheers!
478
00:18:19,529 --> 00:18:21,763
May your marriage be
as sweet and colorful
479
00:18:21,798 --> 00:18:24,499
as this Cloud 9 brand
caffeinated malt beverage,
480
00:18:24,534 --> 00:18:26,968
without the recall for
killing college students.
481
00:18:27,003 --> 00:18:30,138
Thank you, on behalf of myself and Bo.
482
00:18:31,374 --> 00:18:33,308
Well, he did make it memorable.
483
00:18:33,343 --> 00:18:34,642
I'll give him that.
484
00:18:34,678 --> 00:18:36,344
I mean, most guys don't even bother
485
00:18:36,379 --> 00:18:38,146
threatening to kill you
when they propose.
486
00:18:38,181 --> 00:18:39,781
You were never in any real danger.
487
00:18:39,816 --> 00:18:40,882
You know that, right?
488
00:18:40,917 --> 00:18:43,151
Yeah, I know. It was a fake robbery.
489
00:18:43,186 --> 00:18:45,586
This is a high-velocity 440-grain lead
490
00:18:45,622 --> 00:18:47,322
flat-nose projectile with gas checks
491
00:18:47,357 --> 00:18:49,590
and a boxer-primed brass jacket.
492
00:18:49,626 --> 00:18:50,892
If he'd come within 10 feet of you,
493
00:18:50,927 --> 00:18:53,027
you would have seen his head
explode like a watermelon.
494
00:18:54,264 --> 00:18:55,930
Cleanup on aisle...
495
00:18:55,966 --> 00:18:57,231
I don't even know what aisle it is,
496
00:18:57,267 --> 00:18:59,100
'cause his brains would be splattered
497
00:18:59,135 --> 00:19:00,101
all over the sign.
498
00:19:02,872 --> 00:19:04,305
Oh, shoot.
499
00:19:04,341 --> 00:19:07,108
You know, I wish that we
could wear jewelry at work.
500
00:19:07,143 --> 00:19:09,277
Oh, it's so...
501
00:19:09,312 --> 00:19:10,912
sparkly.
502
00:19:10,947 --> 00:19:12,714
You know, I thought about what you said
503
00:19:12,749 --> 00:19:15,616
about not doing something
that I might regret,
504
00:19:15,652 --> 00:19:20,455
but then, in the moment,
you know, under the stars,
505
00:19:20,490 --> 00:19:22,190
it just felt right.
506
00:19:22,225 --> 00:19:24,192
Without you, I would
have never said yes,
507
00:19:24,227 --> 00:19:25,259
so thank you.
508
00:19:25,295 --> 00:19:26,627
Oh.
509
00:19:28,832 --> 00:19:32,066
Well, I should go bail
out my boyfriend now.
510
00:19:32,102 --> 00:19:35,370
Or I mean bail out my fiancé!
511
00:19:35,405 --> 00:19:36,637
Aw.
512
00:19:36,673 --> 00:19:38,606
All right. I got to get going.
513
00:19:38,641 --> 00:19:39,640
Good night, everyone.
514
00:19:39,676 --> 00:19:41,609
Good night.
515
00:19:41,644 --> 00:19:43,978
Hey, wait up.
516
00:19:44,014 --> 00:19:45,246
Wait up.
517
00:19:45,281 --> 00:19:47,648
Hey, I didn't mean to...
518
00:19:47,684 --> 00:19:50,818
That, in there...
519
00:19:50,854 --> 00:19:52,220
I just wanted today
520
00:19:52,255 --> 00:19:54,589
to feel different than yesterday.
521
00:19:54,624 --> 00:19:56,424
Well, then you completely failed,
522
00:19:56,459 --> 00:19:59,761
because that exact same
thing happened yesterday.
523
00:20:02,032 --> 00:20:05,066
But... thank you.
524
00:20:08,104 --> 00:20:09,037
Okay.
525
00:20:09,072 --> 00:20:11,272
I really do have to get going.
526
00:20:11,307 --> 00:20:12,774
See you at work tomorrow, Jonah?
527
00:20:12,809 --> 00:20:16,110
You certainly will... champ.
528
00:20:18,982 --> 00:20:20,915
Amy.
529
00:20:20,950 --> 00:20:24,385
Nice to meet you, Amy.
530
00:20:29,678 --> 00:20:32,396
Yo, you should come with us, man.
531
00:20:32,397 --> 00:20:34,045
We're gonna throw some mannequin
limbs in the dumpster
532
00:20:34,046 --> 00:20:35,725
and watch garbage men freak out.
533
00:20:36,605 --> 00:20:38,019
That sounds awesome.
534
00:20:38,141 --> 00:20:40,875
It is awesome. Come on.
535
00:20:55,329 --> 00:20:59,597
- sync and corrections by Caio -
- www.addic7ed.com -
36059
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