All language subtitles for Royal Pains - 1x02

i'm hank.

i was your typical emergency
room doctor until i got fired.

you let a billionaire
hospital trustee die

to save some kid off the street.

- i made a judgment call.
- you made a mistake.

this is my brother.

i'm evan r. lawson, c.p.a.

he took me away from my
troubles and to the hamptons.

and suddenly, i had a chance to
become a whole new kind of doctor.

it turns out the wealthy
and not so wealthy out here

could use a guy
who makes house calls.

so i got a second chance
to do what i do best.

wha...

can i help you?

it's an abomination,
what you're doing.

you can't separate
an egg from a yolk.

it's like separating
the earth from the moon

or thunder from lightning
or hall from oates.

you just compared daryl
hall to the earth.

what do you know
about taste?

and egg whites happen to be
loaded with protein,

low in calories,
have no fat, and--

taste like it.

- oh.
- what are you do--

in the bowl, hank.

the goal is to get the egg
in the bowl.

look, i spent years at a job

where i had to scrub in and out
countless times a day.

i'm messy at home
because i can be.

- oh...
- look, i'll clean up.

oh, really, you'll clean up
like you clean up your clothes

or the towel
on the bathroom floor?

who are you?

all i'm saying is,
it's been really great

living with you again,
you know.

it's like old times--
sharing a place with my big brother

and the bonding and everything--

wait for it, here it comes.

but you are the biggest slob
i've ever met in my life.

so i make a mess. i clean it up.

no, you make a mess
and i clean it up.

what does it matter?
it's our home.

it matters because
"a," you're a slob, and "b,"

it's not just our home,

but it's also gonna be
our office.

hankmed's workstation.

check it out,
i made a blueprint.

okay, so i've divided
the space into quadrants.

- quadrants?
- it's four parts.

i know what a quadrant is.

work environment in quadrant one.

sleeping quarters in quadrant two.

- stop saying quadrant.
- wet bar in quad--

wet bar over here.

- wet bar?
- yeah, wet bar.

that's pretty cool, right?
it's what people do out here.

- what, get soused?
- yeah, basically.

you gonna get that?

i...

ah, ah, ah.
work before food.

this is hank.

hi. of course.

just text me the address.
okay.

- eh?
- i just...

no. no.

have fun.

- hey.
- hey.

everything okay?

yeah. follow me.

sure. what's up?

good morning.

just play along.

dr. lawson.
sheila montgomery.

- so glad you could make it.
- me too.

from what jill tells me,

you and this turn-key,
center hall modern colonial

are made for each other.

i had no idea you were so familiar
with my architectural leanings.

i surprise people.

dr. lawson, allow me
to show you the great room.

i-i don't want
to waste your time,

but, uh...what?

i'm not really
a big great room man.

but...

this, however, is
truly a great great room.

one of the greatest.

and it's really, uh, great.

sorry to pry.

i couldn't help, um,
but notice.

what did you do
to your arm?

oh, uh, burned myself
taking cookies out of the oven.

occupational hazard.

it's a little realtor trick.

before you show a place,
bake fresh cookies.

it makes a house
smell like a home.

oh, well, that explains my sudden
craving for a glass of milk.

did you see a doctor
about that?

oh, don't worry, hank.
sheila's on top of it.

she has to be
as a diabetic.

diabetic?

uh, you really should
see your doctor.

get that looked at.

i will. i just have a full
day of potential renters.

if you leave that wound untreated,

it could get very serious.

you are absolutely right.

let me show you
the master bedroom.

little doctor trick.

when you're a doctor with a busy
diabeticwho has an untreated burn,

you treat it.

i want you to shower
the wound, using soap,

three to four times a day.

make sure you pat it dry

and cover it
with a clean bandage.

if it starts looking red or pus-y,

i want you to call me
immediately.

and watch your sugars,
okay?

thanks.

are you sure you don't want
to see the basement?

it was just renovated.

- hank has to get back to work.
- yes, i do.

then promise me you'll come back
and see the house at sunset.

- oh, i don't-- it is?
- it's magical then.

key's under the mat.

bring a bottle of wine.

i guarantee it's the most
romantic view in the hamptons.

how can i say no to that?

why did i say yes to that?

because you are a good guy.

and who is she again?

sheila's a neighbor.

her cobra coverage ran out,

and i offered to help,
but she's too proud.

thanks for coming.

and, uh, being so cool.

- cool?
- mm-hmm.

oh, that's me, you know.
mister cool.

no, no, look.
i'm happy to do it.

just give me a little
warning next time.

my playing along skills
are still coming along.

well, hopefully,
there won't be a next time.

i'm sending letters
to all the patients

who've been frozen
out of the hospital

letting them know
that the hamptons free clinic

is on schedule to open in the fall.

- congratulations.
- yeah, thank you.

for some reason, i find myself
craving chocolate chip cookies.

you wanna grab a bite to eat?

i only have 30 minutes
till my next meeting.

we'll take big bites.

hey, divya.

what time is it?

okay, okay.

rain check?

we'll see.

we'll see.

hey, guys.

sorry i'm late.

wow, rule number one
of concierge doctoring, hank:

you don't keep the
rich people waiting.

good to know.

yeah, actually,
come to think of it,

concierge doctors in the hamptons,

by definition,
are required to be arrogant,

boring, and quick to scope out
libby when she's in a bikini.

cut me some slack,
i'm new at this.

but also good to know.

you seem to lack
all of those qualities.

wow, thank you guys so much.

okay, shall we
remove the sutures?

yes.

uh, should we just
do it out here?

i don't see why not.

this will be my first
suture extraction poolside.

huh, the surgeon id nice work.

he was under a lot of pressure.

why, was your father
standing over him?

no, i was.

imagine being
mozart's piano tuner,

but then more stressful
than that.

i guess your dad
didn't visit?

right. busy man.

we're all busy, hank.

all right, you may feel
a little pull.

i'll live.

tucker.

we never received your father's
signed form of consent.

i'd be happy to forge one.

you really should see his
forgeries. they are works of art.

yeah, you know what?
how about we get an original?

yeah, just as soon
as dad gets back.

oh, there's a retirement party
this afternoon

mr. bryant is invited to,

and tucker has
to represent the family.

you guys wanna come?

retirement party?
sounds like a can't-miss.

unfortunately, i'll miss it.

okay, you're all done.

hank, it might be a
good thing for us to go.

in what way would it be good for
us to go to a retirement party?

come on, hank.
old people?

high incomes,
higher blood pressure.

it's your prime demo.

hank, the kid's right.

who's the retiree?

www.1000fr.com presents

Capture:FRM@ID
Sync:smolhh

B i e r d o p j e . c o m

well, i'm ready to leave.

we just got here.

you know what? i'm actually
with hank on this one.

the average age here is dead.

everyone, please.

welcome tess premoli
as she premieres for us

what will be her final piece

with the san francisco
ballet next sunday.

ballerinas.

wait a moment.

that's the retiree?

that was beautiful.

she certainly is.

hottest card-carrying member
of the a.a.r.p. i've ever seen.

plus, as a retired person,

it won't cost as much
to take her to the movies.

forget it. i call dibs, okay?

any hot ballerina is all mine.

that's one of my ground rules.

anyway, yours is over there.

who is that guy jill's talking to?

not you.

i would love to help you out,
but i'm sorry.

you've already--wait!

don't walk away.
i'm not finished with this.

i am not gonna have
this discussion here.

this conversation
is not over.

hi.

how's your neighbor?

sheila?

she's okay.

better.

are you okay?

mm!

i'm fine.

maybe you should, uh,
slow down there.

now that would
defeat the purpose.

thank you, thank you.

thank you very much.

very happy.
thank you for having me.

thank you.

uh...outstanding work.

having sat through
the nutcracker

every christmas
since i was, like, three,

uh, i can say that
with full confidence.

having played my share
of sugar plum fairies,

i can say thank you.

evan r. lawson.

uh, c.f.o. of hankmed.

and so much more.

- so, yeah.
- excuse me, excuse me--hi.

feel this.

silk.

how much you think
this benefit costs?

uh, i don't know. a lot.

twice that. at least.

do you know how much
these things run?

- i don't.
- i do.

see, we've thrown parties
at the hospital.

we get polyester.

he might as well
just burn the money.

what happened with that man?

what man?

the one who apparently dared you
to chug three glasses of wine

before he got back
or there'd be trouble.

uh, or is that
none of my business?

- bingo.
- got it.

hey.

- hey.
- hi, guy

tucker, libby, jill.

- hi, jill.
- jill, tucker, libby.

hi, jill.

we're gonna go
grab a bite to eat.

it's wall-to-wall food here.

yes, but no one can tell me
if the tuna is farmed or wild.

farmed has, on average,
five times less omega-3s

and is, like, three
times higher in mercury.

and they can't say
whether the grapes were grown

with or without pesticides.

we're talking residue such as
azinphos, carbofuran, metalaxyl.

but as a doctor, i'm sure that's
???

oh, yeah.

totally.

but your date seems
to be having a good time.

- oh, no--
- oh, this--

- is not a date.
- it's not a date.

aw.

what do you kids
call it these days?

listen, why don't we go
back to my place?

you know, dad's not home,

and libby's stocked the fridge

with food so organic
you can taste the dirt.

awesome.

would you like the rib
eye or the tenderloin?

yes.

- hi.
- hi.

you're the doctor, right?

um, i'm actually
not the doctor,

medically speaking.

um, but i run hankmed,
which is--

it's a concierge doctor service.

so... great--great party, huh?

i just feel like,
this place is so cool.

the wine and the food
are so--so cool.

yeah, i hate it.

i hate it too.
do you wanna bail?

i can't duck out
on my own party.

can i buy you dinner?

um, it's free
and i have some.

well, you haven't
even touched yours.

- are you not hungry?
- i'm starving.

somebody made this for me.

i don't wanna sound spoiled,

but i can't tell you how sick i am
of grilled fish and fresh fruit.

now that i'm being
put out to pasture,

i'm craving all that stuff
i've had to avoid my whole life.

i know this charming little spot

that specializes
in just that cuisine.

- wow.
- yeah.

i, uh, i don't play around
when it comes to junk.

i don't even know
where to begin.

well, uh, convention says the
cheese crunches are the amuse.

they're light,
they're cheesy.

they, uh, leave your fingers orange.

the nachos
are the hors d'oeuvres.

they also leave your fingers orange.

and then you've earned the dog.

the dog?

yes, the dog.

the dog must be earned.

i can't remember
the last time i had a--

what if i want to start
with the dog?

i love a rebel.

monsignieur.

uh, last time i checked, the
drinking age in new york was 21.

well, while technically
the hamptons are in new york,

they actually occupy a
time-space continuum of their own.

- ???
- ???

and this is a chateau
avignon from 1990.

the greater crime
would be to not drink it.

well, think how much
more aged it'll be

when you're of age
in five years.

so this wine
is older than you?

jill, age is just a number.

right.

yeah, everything's
just a number.

that's how you people think.

"you people"?

like mr. kliner.

he was our biggest donor.

he had plenty of money to throw a
retirement party for a ballerina,

but not enough to honor
his pledge to the free clinic.

and for the record,

free clinics--
they're not free.

big misnomer.

they're expensive.

only you can't call 'em that,
or nobody would come.

you know what, maybe--
why don't we, um,

why don't we walk it off a little?

you wanna go for a walk?

- yeah, let's go.
- let's go for a walk.

- okay.
- okay.

come with me, jill.

i mean, just take
the items in this house.

that model boat,
or that ancient map.

or these guitars,
signed by lennon.

john, not vladimir.

if it were vladimir, that'd
really be worth something.

each one of these gems could
float a year of my clinic.

but i guess paying god knows what
for a pair of torn jeans is-- oh.

oh, my god.

are these really springsteen's?

uh, that or they're running
low on closet space.

you're cute.

okay then.

and voila.

mustard, relish, and onions,
just as god intended it.

no ketchup?

ketchup is for dilettantes
and three year olds.

well, all right then.

okay.

i am so gonna enjoy this.

and not just for
the reason you think.

mm.

yeah?

mm-hmm.

guess it was
worth the wait.

what happened to me?

i'm not sure.

did you eat today?

no, i was too nervous.

i did have a glass
of wine. or two.

oh.

do you remember having
any chest pains,

shortness of breath, headache?

no, nothing.
not that i can remember.

okay, tess,
this is important.

are you on any meds?

do you take recreational
drugs of any kind?

no, no, nothing like that.

am i gonna be okay?

i have my last show next week.

for some reason, your blood
pressure went down to a level

that didn't allow blood
to be pumped to your brain.

it may have been a reaction
to your not eating

and then drinking alcohol
while being tired,

and so you fainted.

you should just--
you should go home,

eat, and get some rest.

and call me if
there are any problems.

okay, i will do that.
thank you.

okay, sure.

i'll be right back, okay?

okay.

thank you for handling that.

you have no idea
how embarrassing this is.

or maybe you do.

long story. she's fine.

wow, two women passed out.

mom would be so proud.

shut up. are you okay to drive?

yeah, unless they've started spiking
the arctic freezees, i'm fine.

good.

hey, jill.

- we're here.
- hi.

uh, how long
have i been out?

a couple minutes,
give or take an hour.

let me help you.

i'm fine. i'm fine.

did you want--

the letters for my clinic.

pointless now.

throw 'em away, please.

they're garbage anyway.

oh, and...

thank you for driving me home.

i'm sure this is not how
you expected your night to go.

hey, you surprise people.

hmm.

- dr. lawson?
- hey.

hi.

is everything okay?

i'm sorry to bother you.

i was just wondering
if we could talk in private?

of course, yeah.
let's take a walk.

i, um, wasn't entirely
honest last night.

i've been dancing
since i was three,

professionally
since i was five.

and don't get me wrong, i love it.

i loved it, but, um,
we take a pounding.

and sometimes, dancers,
for the pain,

the--the anxiety of performance,

weight, trying to stay the best,

we...we take things.

pain medication? diet pills?

anti-anxiety.

are you on all three?

sometimes, yeah.

do you think that's
what caused me to faint?

it's possible. i-i can't know
without doing some blood work.

i'd love to have divya,
my associate, do a full workup.

i have to be able
to dance next week.

dancing's been my whole life, and--

it's gonna be over soon.

hey, guys.

that's so weird.

just going for a run, and...

just run into people.

what's going on?

we were just
going for a walk.

yeah, i was just
showing tess the dunes.

oh, dynamite, dunes.
okay, cool.

yeah, i should get going.

um, i don't wanna
be late, so...

it was really nice
seeing you guys.

yeah, you too, tess.

great seeing you.

did i or did i not call dibs?

relax, i wasn't making a move.

"making a move"?

you actually just said that?

i've been out of the game.

for how long, since
the sinking of the lusitania?

wow.

so what were you doing, then?

talking, that's all i can say.

if you're pulling
doctor-patient confidentiality,

- i'm exempt.
- no, actually, you're not.

uh, need i remind you, i'm
the c.f.o. of hankmed, okay?

c.f.o.

who is also making a move
on my patient.

she ask about me?

we weren't talking about you.

okay, that wasn't my question.

i like her.

and it's not just 'cause
she's a ballerina, either.

although i must say
that doesn't hurt.

look, if you like her,
then ask her out.

did she tell you to tell me that?

Did she tell you to tell me that?

Yes, by my locker,before homeroom.

We did not talk about you.

Okay, stop saying that.

Uh, excuse me.

Do you know where i can find james harper?

Go fish yourself.

Excuse me?

-That's the name of his boat.
-Ah.

Third boat down the pier.

Okay, uh...

You could've just--Thank you.

Excuse me.

Are you james harper?

Name's jim.What do you want?

Hi.My name's hank lawson.

You selling something?

Nope, i'm a doctor.

Have a nice day.

Quick guess.

Unless the yellow in your eyes
and your complexion Is from carrots,

And that paunch in your
midsection Is from too many budweisers,

My hunch is you've got
the symptoms of hep c.

You need to take care of yourself.

I can help you.

Course you can.

Let me guess.

Fill out some forms,sit and wait.

And wait.
And wait.

I've been through the system.

Done the patient history.

Gotten the piss-Poor care.

And been charged through the nose.

-I'll pass.
-I understand.

You don't understand
the first thing about it,Doctor.

Look, hey, can i at least
give you my card?

No.

I know you're the chief of neurosurgery.

But starting a stereotaxic
oncological surgery program

Will cost the hospital millions
in startup That we just don't have.

Could you yell
a little quieter, please?

Okay. Yeah--

I'm coming down there
To haggle this out face to face.

-Hi.
-Hi.

-Um, hi.
-Hey.

Uh, whatever i said last night,
Whatever i did, blanket apology.

I don't drink a lot.

In fact, the last time
i got that drunk,

I had just gotten my degree
in health administration.

And yes, i am aware
of the irony.

Hey, listen.
You were a lady.

Then i must've been really hammered.

Please, sit.

I am not the woman
who makes a fool of herself At a party.

I'm the woman
who makes fun of that woman.

-So you judge.
-Yes.

-Nice.
-But only in the most non-Judgmental way.

- Right.

It was a tough night.

I have been working
on that clinic for three years.

And when the economy tanked,
A lot of the donors pulled out.

Kliner was my biggest,
best, and last hope.

I'm sorry.

Well, this should help.

The hangover, at least.

I have no money to give you,
but i have some aspirin.

I hope you didn't buy these.

You know, i do work in a hospital.

No, i stole them from your hospital.

Mm.

Okay, i have to go And haggle
with the chief of radiology.

Uh...so i didn't just come bearing aspirin.

I could use your help.

- Name it.
-Jim harper.

Jim harper?What about him?

I'd like to see his medical file.

You read one of my letters.

I can't believe you did that.

I glanced.

Okay, i read.
I read.

Look, i think he has hep c.

I can't give you a patient's
information Without their consent.

Well, jim didn't seem like the giving type.

You went to see him?

I can't believe you.

Do you have any idea
how wrong that is,How unethical?

Not to mention,you completely violated
my trust By even looking at that letter.

I'm sorry, jill,but sometimes you've
got to work Outside the system, right?

Bend the rules.

-Break the law?
-The system is broken.

You know that as well as i do.

It's why you're starting your clinic.

Was.

The man needs help.

Interferon, probably.

I want to help him.
I can help him.

And if we are who we treat and
we treat no one,What does that make us?

I'm sorry, hank.

Breaking the rules is not part
of my job description.

??

Hey.Everything okay?

Yeah.Everything okay with you?

Yeah, you texted me.To come here.

You showed up at the wrong mansion.

Hank, you've really got to work
on your concierge doctoring.

I contacted you.

I'm marshall bryant.

You must be dr. Lawson.

No, uh, hank.

Nice to meet you.

Look what--Look what he bought me.

Wow.

Great plane.

Tucker, would you give us a minute?

Yeah, sure.

You're younger than i imagined.

Most concierge doctors around here
Are on their third wives and last legs.

Well, they've--
They've set the bar high.

Dr. Lawson,i want to thank you
For taking such good care of my son.

Hank, please.

Tucker's quite a young man.

He is that.

Sometimes i feel like
i'm the kid And he's the adult.

I know what you mean.

This is for you.

If it's not enough,
you'll let me know.

Oh, uh...no, i'm sure it's fine.

Thanks.

I'd love to offer you a drink,
but my jet is waiting.

Right.

Uh, listen, mr. Bryant.

While i have you,
i-I know you're a busy man.

Oh, boy.

Tucker's drug test
come back positive?

Did his...no.

Um, no.

This is not about tucker's health.

Not his physical health.

What is it about, then?

Uh, well...

I hope i'm not overstepping
any boundaries here.

Um, tucker seems to be
missing something in his life.

I--See, i had a similar
situation when i was his age.

My father...

Well, anyway,maybe you
could spend A little more time with him.

He seems like he could use
some more dad time.

Huh.

You a psychiatrist?

No.

Psychotherapist?

No.

Right.You're a concierge doctor.

Pretty simple concept.

Come when called,
fix patient, cash check.

With all due respect,While that may be
what you're used to,

That's not how i do it.

However you do it,hank,

You don't do it
for us any more.

Let that check
be your severance, hmm?

Hi.

Sorry to be laying in wait
at your house,

But i have something for you.

Fine, i'll see another property.

But it should have a fabulous room
And the person showing it should have leprosy.

Those are my conditions.

No, something better.

This was for a patient Who
no longer comes to the hospital.

It--It's interferon.

We're overstocked.

Before this batch goes bad,

I thought maybe you knew
somebody who could use it.

All right.

Spielberg's pad
is down that way.

And martha stewart has a
modest little mansion Over there.

And the seinfeld summer place
Is about five palaces on the left.

You can't see it,
but it's over there.

You seem to be an expert
on the hamptons.

Did you come here growing up?

Uh, no,i moved out to
the hamptons A couple weeks ago.

- Really?
-Mm-Hmm.

Where are you from?

Different habitat.

Brooklyn, via jersey.

But, uh, then hank had
a little premature Midlife crisis, and...

You know, i guess i did
what any good brother would do.

I sacrificed for family.

Yeah, that hut you're
living in seems harrowing.

It's disgusting, you know.

But sometimes you've just
got to take one for the team.

I know.

Seriously, though, it's--
It's been nice.

Life kind of dead-Ended for me in new york.

And i am all about opportunity.

And it's all opportunity out here.

Kind of like us right now.

Would you like to grab lunch?

Oh, it's just i'm...

I'm having fun.
I don't want to ruin it.

What--

Food and i have a contentious relationship.

Ever since i was a young dancer
trying to make it.

Kind of messed me up.

Hmm.

Then let me unmess you.

I'm back.

I'll get my harpoon.

As inviting as that sounds,
i won't stay long.

The doctor's mantra.

Look, you know,
for what it's worth,

I'm not a big fan
of hospitals myself.

In fact, i just got fired
by one a few weeks ago.

Well, that's reassuring.

Not--No.
Not for medical reasons.

Look...Hospitals are bureaucracies,right?

Bureaucracies screw people.

They overcharge you if you're insured,

And they really do it if you're not,

Just 'cause they can.

You get zero leverage and
no alternatives,So you get screwed.

It's--It's like out here
with the--

With the gas docks when they
price gouge you After a hurricane.

The system sucks.

But you're sick.

And you're gonna get sicker
if you don't get treatment.

I'd like to help you.

That's what they all say.

Then the bill comes.

There is no bill.

No, i'm gonna be here for you
week in, week out.

No red tape, no forms.

No harpoon.

Just me.

So what's the catch?

You're the fisherman,you tell me.

Wow, this is quite a spread.

What's on the menu?

Um, okay.

So the best meal i've ever had
in my entire life Was in machu picchu.

You ever been to machu picchu?

Um, no.

If my company doesn't perform
there,I haven't been.

Okay, basically,it's like heaven on earth.

Like, you have to go one day.

Like, everybody should go.

Tonight, i have recreated
that meal In painstaking detail.

So if you would,senorita.

??

Okay,just take a deep breath.

Relax.

Close your eyes.

I'm ready.I'm there.

Mm.

This is really good.

It tastes really good.

That's good.It's--Yeah.

It's all about just
becoming one with the food.

Ready for bite two?

Mm.

Mm, that's delicious.

Wow.

Big points.

I've been on a lot of dates
around the world,

But you're the first guy
to ever feed me.

Well, you're the first girl
i've ever fed.

So...

Hey, am i interrupting--

Uh, big time.

Would you excuse me
for one second?

Yeah.

-Hey.
-Hey.

So first of all, get out.

But before you do that,
just know,I totally fixed her.

Problem solved.

Uh, which problem
would we be talking about?

Tess's eating problem.
The whole passing out problem.

All problems?
Solved. Me.

Ask her.
Mind over matter.

What's happening?

She's aspirating.

Her food is stuck
in her upper trachea.

Get the emergency medical kit.

Thank you.

Can i help, or do you want me
to do something?

Oh...

-Get it out!
- I'm trying.

All right.

Is she bleeding, or--

Oh, my god.
Okay.

Were you eating before you fainted?

Chorizo bouillabaisse.
It's a peruvian specialty.

Chorizo.

The other night
it was a hot dog.

Are you thinking anaphylactic
reaction to nitrates?

Lines up.

No, it's not.

How can you be so sure?

Because it's happened before.

And not just from nitrates.

Why didn't you tell me that?

There are certain foods
that i love,

That i crave,
that i can't have.

But sometimes i do.

Were you eating this?

Yeah, just a bite.

Okay, um, you're going
on a heart monitor,

And you're gonna eat
a piece of pepperoni pizza.

You really want me to eat that?

You really want her
to eat that?

Yes, i really want her
to eat that.

Step it up, hank.

Okay.

Tess, i want you to take
a big bite of the crust.

-Whoa, whoa, whoa!
- Hank, she's bradying down.

She's going into
cardiogenic shock.

- Shock her! Hit her!
Feed her a snickers!

-Do something!
- Be patient.

Hold on.

Wait wait wait.

You okay?

Yeah, i think so.

Stay down, stay down.

Let your body adjust.

What is it?
What's wrong with her?

Is she allergic
to mediocre pizza, what?

No.

It's not an allergy.

I think you have a condition
That's called deglutition syncope.

You eat certain foods,
you pass out.

It's an extremely rare condition
That causes an atrioventricular block

When you eat specific types of food.

Yeah, your heart is reacting
to certain carbohydrates.

Some have it with carbonated
beverages, some with chocolate.

So it wasn't the hot dog,
it was the bun.

Gold star, evan.

So...So there's
something wrong with my heart?

There is.

You need to see a cardiologist.

I can recommend one.

Uh, they'll probably want
to put in a pacemaker.

You know, it's a good thing
we found it.

If you'd had an episode
while you were driving,

I mean,it could have been fatal.

Wait, hold up a second.

-She needs a pacemaker?
-Yeah.

A cardiologist can put it in
under light sedation.

Will i be able to dance
my final performance?

Yes, as long as you avoid these carbs.

And after your surgery,

You can enjoy a long and happy retirement
Eating as much junk food as you want.

Thank you.

-you're welcome.
-you're welcome.

Feed me, i beg you.

Uh, how do you feel about fish?

I love fish.

That's good,because some dude named jim
Just dropped off two dozen striped bass.

Said they were for you,
And scared the bejeezus out of me.

me too.

I will explain over dinner.

This is civilized.

Yeah.Like gentlemen.

We should do this every night.

As long as you stay out of the kitchen, okay.

You cook, i'll clean.

I'll even pick up my clothes.
Or try.

Henry.

Done. And done.

Clink.

The two of us,keeping a house in order?

Mom would be so...shocked.

Hi.

Oh, hey.
Come on in.

I just wanted to say thank you.

Oh, yeah.No need.

It's--It's what i do.

Well, i-I wanted
to say thank you to evan too.

Hi.

How's the old ticker?

I was just heading out
to mow the--

- Bye.
- Bye.

So...i'm leaving tomorrow
to see that cardiologist.

Tomorrow?
Wow, that's soon.

I know, which is why i wanted to say
thank you For helping me have so much fun.

You got a warped sense of fun, lady.

No, i mean it.
I had a great time.

I mean, other than
passing out a lot.

I did a lot of things with you
i haven't done in years.

I usually get that After
i've dated a girl for a long time.

I'm serious, evan.

I really loved
our time together.

I mean, maybe it didn't
mean much to you,

But it meant a lot to me.

Uh, it meant a lot to me too.

Bought a ticket for machu picchu.

I'm gonna hike it.

I'm flying to cuzco
after the surgery.

You're going to machu picchu?

Yeah, after what you said,
how could i not?

Okay, this is awkward.

Um, i made that up.

I've never even been
to machu picchu.

I-I read it in a magazine.

I thought it would
make the meal sound better.

Like, i couldn't even
find machu picchu on a map.

I don't even know
what country it's in.

Like, maybe it is a country.

Is it like a mountain village,
or what is it?

Well, yeah,after you served, um,

Garlic bread and lobster,

I was wondering if this greatest meal
ever Was at a sizzler in machu picchu.

But it doesn't matter.

I'm gonna have an adventure,
And i need an adventure.

Of course.

Okay.

Yeah, but before i go,There's
just this one thing that i have to do.

God, i hate machu picchu.

That's quite a maneuver,maverick.

Maverick?

Who's that?

Oh, i don't know,a little movie called top--

Top gun.I know, hank.

I'm just joking.

I am aware
of american culture pre-Ipod.

Talk to me, goose.

I didn't realize
you were such a daredevil.

Well, as a hemophiliac,
What choice do i have,you know?

Even slicing an orange can be a deadly stunt.

Didn't dad fire you?

He did.

From being your doctor.

Not from being your friend.

Wanna take it for a spin?

Uh, no.No, thank you.

Fear of flying.

Yeah, me too.

Uh, nice landing, goose.

Hmm, maybe i should've
rented this place.

Sheila was right
about the view.

Yeah, this one's pretty nice.

One of the perks of being a local
Is you know all the best views.

Right.

Were you born here?

Local hamptonite.

Endangered, but not extinct.

Citiots haven't
killed us off yet.

Mm, thank god.
Right, citiots.

Wait, am i a citiot?

I'll grant you temporary
membership to our clan.

-Temporary?What's up with temporary? ??
-Wow.

Thanks for seeing jim.

Yeah, and i'm sorry
about the clinic.

I know how important it was to you.

When i was 12,I was surfing,

And this board tore into my arm.

Nearly separated it
from my shoulder.

And the hospital bills were Way
more than my parents could handle.

But...hamptons heritage
took care of it.

And me, so...

You know, i owe the place so much.

Hmm, that's why
you work at the hospital?

Yeah, i wanted to help
do that for others.

Be a part of something special.

But, you know, it's not
the same place it was.

We have so much less money,
Less staff,less everything.

Hmm.And that explains the clinic.

It's a setback.

That's all.

I don't quit.

You need to know that about me.

Clinic will happen.

I know it will.

And look, in the future,
if there are any...

Sheilas or jims,
you just give them my number.

Guess you can be both.

Both?

Concierge doctor to the rich,

And an on-Call doctor
to the rest of us.

Robin hood of medicine.

As long as no tights are involved.

Why not?You've got nice, strong legs.

Do i, now?

not that i've noticed.

Do you remember anything you said While
you were under the influence The other night?

Not a word.Why?

No reason.Really.

But, uh...

For the record,You are cute.

Excuse me.

Uh, what are you--
What are you doing in our yard?

-Uh, just leaving!
-This is our house.

We were.

Uh, by the way,Great view.

Great.

??

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