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Medical schools often ask applicants
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for an essay describing a time
they faced adversity...
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00:00:19,117 --> 00:00:20,317
...and how they overcame it.
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00:00:22,187 --> 00:00:23,988
They want to know how people will cope
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with the challenges
they'll face as a doctor.
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00:00:36,901 --> 00:00:40,170
Some students worry they have
nothing to write about.
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They haven't faced difficulty.
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I didn't have that problem.
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Morning, Meredith.
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Synced & corrected by -robtor-
www.addic7ed.com
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Uh, let's start with regional updates.
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Uh, Hunt?
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Shouldn't we start with
an update on Meredith Grey?
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Yeah. I mean, has her I.S. improved?
15
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Yeah. Is she on a proning schedule?
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People, people.
I know we're all concerned,
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but Meredith is getting excellent care
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from Altman and DeLuca.
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She's stable and she's resting.
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In the meantime, we have a hospital
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full of patients who need us.
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00:01:45,619 --> 00:01:47,053
Hunt?
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00:01:47,088 --> 00:01:51,558
Yesterday Seattle reported
345 more cases, 29 deaths.
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Test positivity rate
has increased to 4.7%,
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00:01:54,261 --> 00:01:55,995
so we should prepare for more patients.
26
00:01:56,063 --> 00:01:57,030
COVID ICU?
27
00:01:57,064 --> 00:01:58,765
Beds are at 68% capacity.
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00:01:58,833 --> 00:02:00,266
We'll likely need more
by the end of the month.
29
00:02:00,301 --> 00:02:03,436
53 of the 72 ventilators
are currently in use.
30
00:02:03,471 --> 00:02:05,839
Are there any cases
that warrant discussion?
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00:02:05,873 --> 00:02:07,540
Hi. Hello.
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00:02:07,575 --> 00:02:09,743
- I've got one. Me.
- K-Koracick? How did you...
33
00:02:09,777 --> 00:02:12,011
I-I've got connections.
I'm emeritus chief of chiefs.
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00:02:12,046 --> 00:02:13,179
That is not a thing.
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00:02:13,247 --> 00:02:15,215
As I'm sure Hunt gleefully told you,
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I tested positive for COVID.
37
00:02:16,617 --> 00:02:18,385
But I think the test was a dud.
38
00:02:18,452 --> 00:02:20,286
Breathing's normal, good heart rate,
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00:02:20,321 --> 00:02:21,388
singing voice unaffected...
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00:02:21,455 --> 00:02:23,056
That does not change the rules.
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00:02:23,090 --> 00:02:25,625
A negative COVID test
or a 14-day quarantine.
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00:02:25,659 --> 00:02:28,128
- You're not even close.
- Then send me a new test.
43
00:02:28,195 --> 00:02:30,263
And can you adjust my camera angle?
44
00:02:30,331 --> 00:02:32,699
As lovely as the ceiling is, I...
45
00:02:42,810 --> 00:02:46,279
Did you know that there are
murder hornets now?
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00:02:46,313 --> 00:02:47,981
- What?
- Yeah.
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00:02:48,015 --> 00:02:50,884
As if the COVID outbreak
right after my husband dumped me
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00:02:50,918 --> 00:02:52,419
wasn't bad enough.
49
00:02:52,453 --> 00:02:56,256
I'm gonna go home, crawl into
bed before my next shift.
50
00:02:56,290 --> 00:02:58,291
Yeah, I'm done, too. Look,
if you don't want to be alone,
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00:02:58,325 --> 00:02:59,492
you can come hang out at my place.
52
00:02:59,527 --> 00:03:02,228
Um, let me think about the
last time I went to your place
53
00:03:02,263 --> 00:03:03,463
and... no.
54
00:03:03,497 --> 00:03:07,267
At least I don't have a resident
living on my couch, okay?
55
00:03:07,301 --> 00:03:09,235
I got fancy beer
and a negative COVID test.
56
00:03:09,270 --> 00:03:12,172
I guess also April switched
Harriett's days on me, but...
57
00:03:12,206 --> 00:03:14,174
Oh, so you're lonely.
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00:03:14,208 --> 00:03:15,842
Will you just come over, alright?
59
00:03:15,876 --> 00:03:19,379
We can watch TV and, I don't
know, order pizza. Or sushi.
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00:03:19,413 --> 00:03:20,480
Start over.
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00:03:20,514 --> 00:03:22,225
Friendship reboot.
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00:03:23,350 --> 00:03:25,185
We're getting both and you're paying.
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00:03:25,219 --> 00:03:27,353
- Fine.
- And no Kenny G!
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Hey, buddy.
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00:03:31,625 --> 00:03:33,726
Yeah.
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Just me and you.
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This is called a "C" chord.
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00:03:39,900 --> 00:03:41,601
I'll teach you one day.
69
00:03:42,803 --> 00:03:44,471
Why can't I find gauze in a house
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00:03:44,505 --> 00:03:46,506
with so many surgeons living in it?
71
00:03:46,540 --> 00:03:48,508
Uh, who's bleeding this time?
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00:03:48,576 --> 00:03:49,943
Bailey lost a tooth.
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00:03:49,977 --> 00:03:51,644
The one that's been loose for two weeks?
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00:03:51,679 --> 00:03:52,879
That's supposed to happen.
75
00:03:52,913 --> 00:03:55,548
Well, not when your mom
is in the hospital with COVID.
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00:03:55,583 --> 00:03:56,783
Mer's gonna get better.
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00:03:56,851 --> 00:03:58,718
You don't know that's true.
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00:03:58,752 --> 00:04:01,187
You don't know that it's not.
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00:04:01,222 --> 00:04:02,322
Alright, look, um,
80
00:04:02,389 --> 00:04:05,391
let's... let's look at
the bright side of things, okay?
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00:04:05,426 --> 00:04:07,427
We get to introduce Bailey
to the Tooth Fairy.
82
00:04:07,461 --> 00:04:09,462
Kids love the Tooth Fairy.
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00:04:09,497 --> 00:04:11,364
I'll, uh... I'll check on him.
84
00:04:13,434 --> 00:04:14,767
The bright side?
85
00:04:17,104 --> 00:04:21,074
Dr. Kuo at the Catherine Fox
Medical Center in Manhattan
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00:04:21,108 --> 00:04:24,244
is doing a trial with
monoclonal antibodies for COVID.
87
00:04:24,278 --> 00:04:26,479
She's got room for two more patients,
but we got to jump on it.
88
00:04:26,547 --> 00:04:28,414
I read that study.
Didn't three patients die?
89
00:04:28,449 --> 00:04:31,150
Well, there's a strong chance
that they got the drug too late.
90
00:04:31,218 --> 00:04:32,886
Dr. Webber, her lungs are flooded,
91
00:04:32,953 --> 00:04:35,021
a-and she's sleeping
almost around the clock.
92
00:04:35,055 --> 00:04:36,890
Richard, I would never
give this recommendation
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00:04:36,957 --> 00:04:39,025
if I didn't think that the good
outweighed the bad.
94
00:04:41,462 --> 00:04:43,730
Thank you. I'll... I'll think about it.
95
00:04:43,764 --> 00:04:45,018
Okay.
96
00:04:45,699 --> 00:04:46,933
Dr. Webber...
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00:04:46,967 --> 00:04:49,435
I said I'd think about it.
98
00:04:56,310 --> 00:04:59,145
Mom, I can't come see you.
99
00:04:59,179 --> 00:05:01,114
Because of the pandemic, remember?
100
00:05:01,148 --> 00:05:04,284
There's a bad virus and no vaccine yet.
101
00:05:04,351 --> 00:05:06,886
But I can call you later, though, okay?
102
00:05:06,921 --> 00:05:08,555
I... Mnh.
103
00:05:08,622 --> 00:05:10,657
How you feeling, Chief?
104
00:05:10,691 --> 00:05:13,259
I moved my parents here
from across the country
105
00:05:13,294 --> 00:05:17,297
into an assisted-living facility
just in time to never see them.
106
00:05:17,331 --> 00:05:20,366
I meant your ankle.
But sorry to hear that.
107
00:05:20,401 --> 00:05:21,531
It's fine. Thank you.
108
00:05:21,566 --> 00:05:24,074
Hello? Can someone help me?
109
00:05:25,439 --> 00:05:26,606
Hi. I'm Dr. Kim.
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00:05:30,377 --> 00:05:31,744
Where are you from?
111
00:05:31,779 --> 00:05:34,314
Orthopedics. And it looks like
you just have a cut here,
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00:05:34,381 --> 00:05:35,782
so let's find you another doctor
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00:05:35,816 --> 00:05:37,884
who can help take care of this, okay?
114
00:05:42,489 --> 00:05:43,923
Orthopedics?
115
00:05:43,958 --> 00:05:45,558
You know that's not what she was asking.
116
00:05:45,593 --> 00:05:47,560
- I know.
- It doesn't bother you?
117
00:05:47,595 --> 00:05:49,662
Her assuming you're not from here?
118
00:05:49,697 --> 00:05:51,431
Happens to all of us
at some point, right?
119
00:05:53,500 --> 00:05:55,902
- What do we have?
- Dave Oyadomari, 37,
120
00:05:55,970 --> 00:05:57,437
head lac and right shoulder pain
121
00:05:57,504 --> 00:05:58,871
after falling off of a step ladder.
122
00:05:58,906 --> 00:06:01,441
He also complains of abdominal
pain, nausea, and vomiting
123
00:06:01,475 --> 00:06:02,976
with a 102 fever.
124
00:06:03,010 --> 00:06:05,478
He was recently treated here
by Dr. Hunt for appendicitis
125
00:06:05,512 --> 00:06:07,347
then sent home on oral antibiotics.
126
00:06:07,414 --> 00:06:08,581
Yeah. I'll be okay.
127
00:06:08,616 --> 00:06:10,483
Can... Can you just give me
some more antibiotics
128
00:06:10,517 --> 00:06:11,918
and... and a sling or something?
129
00:06:11,952 --> 00:06:13,453
You were in so much pain
that you fell off a ladder.
130
00:06:13,487 --> 00:06:14,687
I had to call an ambulance!
131
00:06:14,755 --> 00:06:16,022
Meet my wife, Tammi.
132
00:06:16,056 --> 00:06:17,557
Okay. We'll check him out, Tammi.
133
00:06:17,591 --> 00:06:20,326
Uh, he's tachycardic
and slightly hypotensive.
134
00:06:20,361 --> 00:06:21,427
Kim. Here.
135
00:06:21,495 --> 00:06:24,464
Let's get him to trauma one
and do a COVID test,
136
00:06:24,498 --> 00:06:27,667
STAT X-rays, labs, and a FAST exam.
137
00:06:27,701 --> 00:06:29,535
Got it.
138
00:06:35,509 --> 00:06:37,944
You trying to will her
into joining the trial?
139
00:06:37,978 --> 00:06:39,674
No.
140
00:06:40,347 --> 00:06:43,282
I'm hoping she suddenly
gets better and doesn't need it.
141
00:07:02,002 --> 00:07:03,903
Excuse me!
142
00:07:09,910 --> 00:07:11,377
Hello?!
143
00:07:20,487 --> 00:07:22,088
Mer?
144
00:07:22,156 --> 00:07:23,885
George?!
145
00:07:24,558 --> 00:07:26,680
What are you doing here?
146
00:07:46,588 --> 00:07:48,556
Did you ask the humans
to take you to their leader?
147
00:07:48,590 --> 00:07:49,824
Because it's no longer me.
148
00:07:49,858 --> 00:07:51,859
It's Dr. Helm. I'm here
to do your COVID test.
149
00:07:51,894 --> 00:07:53,494
No, you're here to deliver it.
150
00:07:53,529 --> 00:07:55,463
I don't allow residents
in my house or up my nose.
151
00:07:55,497 --> 00:07:58,065
- Uh, just put it down.
- Right here.
152
00:07:59,768 --> 00:08:01,035
Back up.
153
00:08:01,103 --> 00:08:03,271
Back, back, back, back, back,
back, back, back, back, back.
154
00:08:03,305 --> 00:08:05,106
Bup, bup, bup, bup, bup.
155
00:08:15,250 --> 00:08:17,218
Did you know that I had COVID?
156
00:08:17,252 --> 00:08:19,220
It was mild, but scary.
157
00:08:19,254 --> 00:08:21,322
I learned how to make sourdough.
158
00:08:21,356 --> 00:08:25,326
I couldn't taste it or smell it,
but the texture seemed right.
159
00:08:25,360 --> 00:08:29,597
I also, uh, binged a docuseries
about house...
160
00:08:29,631 --> 00:08:32,066
You can stop your "What I did
over COVID vacation" report.
161
00:08:32,100 --> 00:08:33,701
I have no interest in baking, bingeing,
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00:08:33,735 --> 00:08:35,570
or doing anything you did
or will ever do or...
163
00:08:35,604 --> 00:08:36,871
What?
164
00:08:38,207 --> 00:08:41,976
Are you plotting something... evil?
165
00:08:42,044 --> 00:08:44,111
No. I'm stopping the pandemic.
166
00:08:51,453 --> 00:08:56,157
Chopped chicken salad
with homemade sweet pickles
167
00:08:56,225 --> 00:08:57,525
on toasted bread.
168
00:08:57,593 --> 00:09:00,094
That's a Nana Ante special right there.
169
00:09:00,128 --> 00:09:02,233
Ooh! Jealous!
170
00:09:02,865 --> 00:09:04,732
I had stale cashews.
171
00:09:04,766 --> 00:09:07,656
Well, mine's nothing compared
to hers, but it's not bad.
172
00:09:08,170 --> 00:09:09,871
And I just can't wait
for you two to meet.
173
00:09:09,905 --> 00:09:11,105
I hope to, someday.
174
00:09:11,139 --> 00:09:13,274
Tonight too soon? It's her birthday.
175
00:09:13,308 --> 00:09:16,611
And, uh, we're doing a...
A virtual dinner.
176
00:09:16,645 --> 00:09:20,281
Or if it's too soon, no rush.
177
00:09:20,315 --> 00:09:23,184
No, no, I just, uh...
178
00:09:23,218 --> 00:09:24,785
It's Meredith.
179
00:09:24,820 --> 00:09:27,188
I-I know there's nothing
I can do, but...
180
00:09:27,222 --> 00:09:29,924
Anything I do that isn't trying to help
181
00:09:29,958 --> 00:09:31,726
just feels selfish and wrong.
182
00:09:31,760 --> 00:09:34,795
Joy is in short supply these days.
183
00:09:34,830 --> 00:09:36,364
Especially our joy.
184
00:09:36,398 --> 00:09:37,732
It sure as hell is.
185
00:09:37,766 --> 00:09:39,600
That's why I'm grabbing it when I can.
186
00:09:39,635 --> 00:09:41,535
You know, it might be a text from you.
187
00:09:41,570 --> 00:09:43,271
It might be the fancy pencils
188
00:09:43,305 --> 00:09:45,106
I bought for my crossword puzzles.
189
00:09:45,140 --> 00:09:47,074
It might be just taking a few minutes
190
00:09:47,109 --> 00:09:49,143
to sit outside with
my chicken-salad sandwich
191
00:09:49,211 --> 00:09:51,741
and look at the daffodils.
192
00:09:52,814 --> 00:09:54,315
I don't mean to tell you how to be.
193
00:09:54,349 --> 00:09:56,317
Uh... are you mad?
194
00:09:56,385 --> 00:09:57,485
- No, no.
- Ignore me. Ignore me.
195
00:09:57,519 --> 00:10:02,423
I'm not mad. I'm not mad.
I'm... a little hurt maybe.
196
00:10:02,457 --> 00:10:04,592
You got fancy pencils
and you didn't tell me?
197
00:10:04,660 --> 00:10:06,294
Wait. Are you a pencil nerd, too?
198
00:10:06,361 --> 00:10:10,665
Oh, I special ordered a vintage
pencil sharpener from Paris.
199
00:10:11,767 --> 00:10:14,135
Oh, oh. That's my resident.
200
00:10:14,169 --> 00:10:15,269
And... joy's over.
201
00:10:15,304 --> 00:10:16,804
Until dinner tonight.
202
00:10:16,872 --> 00:10:18,339
Until dinner tonight.
203
00:10:21,109 --> 00:10:23,177
My great-grandpa was an accountant,
204
00:10:23,211 --> 00:10:26,180
but no one would hire him
after he came back from camp.
205
00:10:26,214 --> 00:10:29,951
So he got a job
as a line cook in a diner
206
00:10:29,985 --> 00:10:32,386
and eventually started Toyo.
207
00:10:32,421 --> 00:10:34,855
- Where was he interned?
- Tule Lake.
208
00:10:34,890 --> 00:10:36,924
My great-grandparents
were sent to Jerome.
209
00:10:36,959 --> 00:10:38,359
I'm Gosei on my mom's side.
210
00:10:38,393 --> 00:10:39,727
Scans up yet?
211
00:10:39,761 --> 00:10:41,929
Yep, just came up.
212
00:10:41,964 --> 00:10:43,864
Dr. Hunt, I read
213
00:10:43,899 --> 00:10:46,033
that you initially
diagnosed appendicitis,
214
00:10:46,068 --> 00:10:48,002
but these scans show pelvic free fluid
215
00:10:48,036 --> 00:10:49,537
and a paracolonic abscess.
216
00:10:49,571 --> 00:10:52,173
I think he might have
right-sided diverticulitis.
217
00:10:52,207 --> 00:10:53,474
Yep.
218
00:10:53,508 --> 00:10:55,376
And it looks like it's perforated.
219
00:10:55,410 --> 00:10:57,345
Plus, his X-rays show
a broken collarbone.
220
00:10:57,379 --> 00:10:59,280
Okay, book an OR,
and I'll meet you up there.
221
00:10:59,314 --> 00:11:00,815
We need to get him up there right now.
222
00:11:00,849 --> 00:11:02,984
Really? We... We as in me?
223
00:11:03,018 --> 00:11:04,885
Yeah, it's your diagnosis.
224
00:11:04,920 --> 00:11:06,988
Good catch, Tseng.
225
00:11:12,361 --> 00:11:13,861
Congratulations.
226
00:11:13,895 --> 00:11:17,231
You just ordered Nathan Ramos
a pregnancy test.
227
00:11:17,265 --> 00:11:19,500
What? How?!
228
00:11:21,403 --> 00:11:23,683
- Hey.
- Hey.
229
00:11:24,573 --> 00:11:25,806
Hey.
230
00:11:27,376 --> 00:11:29,377
You already said that.
231
00:11:29,411 --> 00:11:31,645
Portable X-ray to the third floor.
232
00:11:31,680 --> 00:11:33,314
Portable X-ray to the third floor.
233
00:11:33,348 --> 00:11:35,483
Ooh! He cute.
234
00:11:35,517 --> 00:11:37,852
- No one asked you.
- Okay.
235
00:11:37,886 --> 00:11:40,054
Wait. No, no, no. Wait.
She kicked you out of bed,
236
00:11:40,088 --> 00:11:42,823
- so you were, like, what, naked?
- I'm naked. Naked.
237
00:11:42,858 --> 00:11:45,526
I was naked in bed with
my boyfriend, and she just...
238
00:11:45,560 --> 00:11:47,395
And it wasn't just one time either.
239
00:11:47,429 --> 00:11:50,164
I mean, it kind of says
less about him than her.
240
00:11:50,198 --> 00:11:51,399
Really, though? Does it?
241
00:11:51,433 --> 00:11:53,467
Yeah. Mer's like a force of nature.
242
00:11:54,636 --> 00:11:56,574
Yeah. That's right.
243
00:11:57,239 --> 00:11:59,740
She's a force of nature. She, um...
244
00:12:02,277 --> 00:12:05,413
She's gonna beat this thing. Right?
245
00:12:06,515 --> 00:12:07,915
Right.
246
00:12:07,949 --> 00:12:10,588
Right. Yeah.
247
00:12:18,326 --> 00:12:20,428
Derek said the sand isn't real.
248
00:12:20,462 --> 00:12:22,596
Yeah, no. Neither is the ocean.
249
00:12:22,631 --> 00:12:25,019
It is nice, though.
250
00:12:26,068 --> 00:12:28,736
I wouldn't want to leave either.
251
00:12:28,770 --> 00:12:29,970
The beach?
252
00:12:30,005 --> 00:12:32,373
Your kids.
253
00:12:34,109 --> 00:12:35,776
Got great kids.
254
00:12:35,811 --> 00:12:39,046
They're the best. You didn't meet them.
255
00:12:39,114 --> 00:12:41,411
I check in sometimes.
256
00:12:42,250 --> 00:12:44,552
How did you get older?
257
00:12:44,586 --> 00:12:47,221
Sand isn't real, the ocean isn't real.
258
00:12:47,289 --> 00:12:50,091
The body... it's not real.
259
00:12:51,426 --> 00:12:55,663
Maybe it's just more peaceful
for you to imagine me older?
260
00:12:55,697 --> 00:12:58,432
You sound like a fortune cookie.
261
00:13:09,511 --> 00:13:11,545
Do I choose?
262
00:13:11,580 --> 00:13:14,782
Do I get to decide if I go back?
263
00:13:14,816 --> 00:13:17,551
I don't know. I didn't.
264
00:13:19,688 --> 00:13:23,757
I would have stayed if I could have.
265
00:13:23,825 --> 00:13:26,193
It's different for everyone, though.
266
00:13:38,106 --> 00:13:39,373
She's still asleep?
267
00:13:39,441 --> 00:13:41,008
She needs her rest.
268
00:13:41,042 --> 00:13:43,110
You want to wake her
and ask her about the trial?
269
00:13:43,145 --> 00:13:45,446
- I tried.
- How hard?
270
00:13:46,815 --> 00:13:48,382
She needs her rest, Bailey.
271
00:13:48,416 --> 00:13:50,551
If you think I'm struggling
with the decision,
272
00:13:50,619 --> 00:13:52,453
how do you think she's gonna do?
273
00:13:54,756 --> 00:13:57,825
You want to talk pros and cons?
274
00:13:57,859 --> 00:13:59,994
We don't know anything about the virus,
275
00:14:00,028 --> 00:14:02,396
so we don't know anything
about the treatment,
276
00:14:02,430 --> 00:14:06,534
so we don't know any of the pros
or any of the cons.
277
00:14:06,568 --> 00:14:09,537
Let's just see if the proning helps.
278
00:14:17,552 --> 00:14:21,152
The boy refused
to wear anything with buttons.
279
00:14:21,176 --> 00:14:24,278
Collared shirts, slacks, even jeans.
280
00:14:24,313 --> 00:14:26,481
Look. Buttons confine, okay?
281
00:14:26,548 --> 00:14:29,384
Now, elastic waistbands
give you freedom.
282
00:14:29,451 --> 00:14:31,486
You better not be wearing
elastic waistbands
283
00:14:31,520 --> 00:14:32,787
when you take Maggie out.
284
00:14:32,821 --> 00:14:34,322
I promise you he doesn't.
285
00:14:34,356 --> 00:14:36,457
Oh, is this your brother?
286
00:14:36,492 --> 00:14:37,659
He said he had to work.
287
00:14:37,726 --> 00:14:38,826
Happy Birthday, Momma!
288
00:14:38,861 --> 00:14:40,128
Thanks, baby.
289
00:14:40,162 --> 00:14:41,329
We're actually in the middle of dinner.
290
00:14:41,397 --> 00:14:43,264
Winston, I invited your dad.
291
00:14:43,298 --> 00:14:45,900
And you have to get along
because it's my birthday.
292
00:14:45,934 --> 00:14:48,169
So, who is this young lady?
293
00:14:48,203 --> 00:14:51,039
Um, I'm Maggie Pierce.
I'm a friend of Winston's.
294
00:14:51,073 --> 00:14:52,306
Friend? Ha.
295
00:14:52,341 --> 00:14:55,176
Maggie's a genius doctor like Winston.
296
00:14:55,210 --> 00:14:56,344
She used to be his teacher.
297
00:14:56,378 --> 00:14:58,212
Winston? A genius?
298
00:14:58,247 --> 00:15:00,081
Oh, stop playin'.
299
00:15:00,149 --> 00:15:03,251
You know that boy
almost failed sixth grade.
300
00:15:03,285 --> 00:15:04,619
Such a pain.
301
00:15:04,653 --> 00:15:06,320
Maybe I wouldn't have
missed so much class
302
00:15:06,355 --> 00:15:09,223
if I wasn't helping Mom while
you gambled away our savings.
303
00:15:09,258 --> 00:15:11,329
- Winston!
- Sorry, Nana. No disrespect.
304
00:15:11,353 --> 00:15:14,989
Listen, man, I never pretended
to be a perfect man.
305
00:15:15,023 --> 00:15:18,059
But I love you, and I love my momma.
306
00:15:18,093 --> 00:15:23,097
So, please, for her sake,
let's try to be civil.
307
00:15:23,131 --> 00:15:24,565
Civil, huh?
308
00:15:26,502 --> 00:15:27,635
Okay.
309
00:15:30,038 --> 00:15:32,640
Happy birthday, Nana. I love you.
310
00:15:33,542 --> 00:15:34,809
Uh...
311
00:15:38,146 --> 00:15:40,748
So, is there cake?
312
00:15:44,186 --> 00:15:46,120
Why are you up so early?
313
00:15:46,154 --> 00:15:48,523
Front desk.
I got some breakfast delivered.
314
00:15:48,557 --> 00:15:49,824
Oh, you know what?
315
00:15:49,892 --> 00:15:51,459
If I was hungry, I would have
just eaten the cold pizza.
316
00:15:51,493 --> 00:15:53,661
Who said I got you any?
317
00:15:53,729 --> 00:15:55,863
Can't believe I fell asleep.
318
00:15:55,898 --> 00:15:58,666
Never should've started
a movie with two sequels.
319
00:15:58,700 --> 00:16:00,134
Prequels. They were prequels.
320
00:16:00,168 --> 00:16:02,803
And I said that,
but you called me a wuss.
321
00:16:02,838 --> 00:16:04,305
Why is your couch
322
00:16:04,339 --> 00:16:05,706
more comfortable than my bed?
323
00:16:05,741 --> 00:16:09,176
Well, you're welcome to it
whenever you want.
324
00:16:09,211 --> 00:16:14,148
Thank you for the friendship reboot.
325
00:16:14,216 --> 00:16:17,051
It almost made up for the last
time that I woke up here.
326
00:16:17,085 --> 00:16:18,553
Tried to rip the Band-Aid off too soon.
327
00:16:18,587 --> 00:16:19,854
It's behind us. We're good.
328
00:16:19,922 --> 00:16:21,489
Uh, but you can take the pizza with you.
329
00:16:21,557 --> 00:16:22,857
I'll grab it for you.
330
00:16:24,426 --> 00:16:26,160
Wait.
331
00:16:29,031 --> 00:16:30,064
Mnh, mnh, mnh.
332
00:16:30,098 --> 00:16:31,866
I'm ripping off the Band-Aid.
333
00:16:44,112 --> 00:16:48,249
It's just a basic algorithm that
simulates the spread of COVID.
334
00:16:48,283 --> 00:16:51,218
Here's what it would look like
if everyone social-distanced.
335
00:16:54,990 --> 00:16:57,925
Here... if everyone wore face masks.
336
00:17:00,329 --> 00:17:02,597
It's just a little
stochastic S-I-R model
337
00:17:02,631 --> 00:17:05,066
that allows for multivariable inputs...
338
00:17:06,301 --> 00:17:09,236
...w-which I built by converting
a "Zombie Apocalypse" game.
339
00:17:09,271 --> 00:17:11,339
I love that game! How does yours end?
340
00:17:11,373 --> 00:17:12,573
I-I don't know yet.
341
00:17:12,608 --> 00:17:14,942
Same. I never got past
level eight, so...
342
00:17:14,977 --> 00:17:16,577
Yeah, Helm, I appreciate your interest,
343
00:17:16,612 --> 00:17:18,245
but, uh, no one's gonna know
my test is negative
344
00:17:18,280 --> 00:17:20,247
if it never leaves my porch, hmm?
345
00:17:20,282 --> 00:17:22,049
Show's over.
346
00:17:22,084 --> 00:17:23,651
Bye-ee!
347
00:17:27,856 --> 00:17:30,358
I was devastated when you died.
348
00:17:30,392 --> 00:17:33,227
You were all cracking up at my funeral.
349
00:17:35,197 --> 00:17:36,731
Well, we were...
350
00:17:36,765 --> 00:17:37,832
No. What?
351
00:17:37,866 --> 00:17:40,134
What? No.
352
00:17:40,168 --> 00:17:43,204
It... That made me happy.
353
00:17:46,108 --> 00:17:48,242
I was devastated.
354
00:17:48,276 --> 00:17:52,279
And then I was okay.
355
00:17:52,347 --> 00:17:54,815
And even with Derek...
356
00:17:54,850 --> 00:17:58,486
eventually you go on.
357
00:17:58,520 --> 00:18:01,397
And the kids would go on.
358
00:18:01,990 --> 00:18:03,774
They would, but...
359
00:18:04,326 --> 00:18:07,828
I think maybe with them it's different.
360
00:18:07,863 --> 00:18:09,230
My mom didn't go on.
361
00:18:09,264 --> 00:18:10,631
No?
362
00:18:10,666 --> 00:18:13,117
Not really, not like she used to.
363
00:18:14,136 --> 00:18:16,454
Some grief is...
364
00:18:17,039 --> 00:18:19,558
Is heavier than other grief.
365
00:18:19,621 --> 00:18:21,275
Sometimes it moves through you,
366
00:18:21,309 --> 00:18:24,629
and sometimes it... It just gets stuck.
367
00:18:25,013 --> 00:18:27,507
And you carry it. Like my mom.
368
00:18:28,383 --> 00:18:30,217
My mom carries it.
369
00:18:31,887 --> 00:18:34,514
Sometimes I try to shake it out of her.
370
00:18:35,857 --> 00:18:37,350
What?!
371
00:18:37,859 --> 00:18:39,293
Like, you know...
372
00:18:39,361 --> 00:18:40,661
Like you haunt her?
373
00:18:40,729 --> 00:18:42,430
Well, I mean, if you want
to call it that, I...
374
00:18:45,233 --> 00:18:48,703
I just want her to... let it go.
375
00:18:48,737 --> 00:18:50,471
I want her to know I'm still me
376
00:18:50,539 --> 00:18:53,941
even though she can't touch me
and she can't see me,
377
00:18:53,975 --> 00:18:56,277
but I am still me.
378
00:18:56,344 --> 00:18:57,945
It's not the same.
379
00:18:57,979 --> 00:18:59,413
No, I know.
380
00:19:09,591 --> 00:19:11,025
You know, her sats were steady,
381
00:19:11,059 --> 00:19:12,393
but now they're just getting worse.
382
00:19:12,427 --> 00:19:14,328
I made some calls,
and there's another spot open
383
00:19:14,362 --> 00:19:16,630
in Dr. Kuo's trial,
but we have to act fast.
384
00:19:16,665 --> 00:19:20,201
Is there another spot
because another patient died?
385
00:19:23,605 --> 00:19:25,506
Have you seen the opacities
in her lungs?
386
00:19:25,540 --> 00:19:26,974
Dr. Webber, at this point,
387
00:19:27,008 --> 00:19:29,009
you can either hope
that she wakes up again
388
00:19:29,044 --> 00:19:32,680
or you can make the decisions
that she chose you to make!
389
00:19:32,714 --> 00:19:34,415
I beg your pardon?
390
00:19:34,483 --> 00:19:38,219
The choice is between doing
nothing and doing something.
391
00:19:40,655 --> 00:19:42,590
Do something.
392
00:19:52,004 --> 00:19:53,383
- You had to leave him open?
- Yes.
393
00:19:53,417 --> 00:19:55,376
Once we got in, his colon was a mess.
394
00:19:55,401 --> 00:19:57,373
So we had to bring up an ileostomy
395
00:19:57,409 --> 00:19:59,562
and place an ABTHERA for the swelling.
396
00:19:59,589 --> 00:20:01,123
His clavicle's non-displaced.
397
00:20:01,157 --> 00:20:02,825
Fracture should heal quite nicely.
398
00:20:02,892 --> 00:20:04,460
- How soon?
- Till he can work again?
399
00:20:04,494 --> 00:20:05,694
Maybe a month.
400
00:20:05,729 --> 00:20:07,129
Tseng, let's diurese him overnight
401
00:20:07,163 --> 00:20:08,897
and let's put him on
the stand-by list for the OR
402
00:20:08,932 --> 00:20:10,860
in case we need to do
a washout tomorrow.
403
00:20:11,434 --> 00:20:13,002
You did well today.
404
00:20:17,374 --> 00:20:18,674
Can I ask you something?
405
00:20:18,708 --> 00:20:20,743
Am I literally the only person
that can answer it?
406
00:20:20,777 --> 00:20:23,178
Kind of.
407
00:20:23,213 --> 00:20:25,881
Our patient's Asian-American.
408
00:20:25,915 --> 00:20:29,018
So right-side diverticulitis
was a greater possibility.
409
00:20:29,085 --> 00:20:31,820
But Dr. Hunt didn't scan him
when he first came in.
410
00:20:31,855 --> 00:20:33,722
So, what's your question?
411
00:20:33,757 --> 00:20:36,258
I think he should know so he
doesn't make this mistake again.
412
00:20:36,293 --> 00:20:37,793
But I don't know how to
talk to him about it.
413
00:20:37,827 --> 00:20:39,862
You don't know how to accuse
your attending of being a racist?
414
00:20:39,896 --> 00:20:42,331
- That's not what I meant.
- Well, that's what he's gonna hear.
415
00:20:42,399 --> 00:20:45,701
So your advice is... do nothing?
416
00:20:47,637 --> 00:20:50,069
You're a resident. He's an attending.
417
00:20:50,106 --> 00:20:52,041
My advice to you is, if you're
gonna have a conversation
418
00:20:52,075 --> 00:20:54,677
with him, at least know what to expect.
419
00:21:01,851 --> 00:21:04,186
Hello! Dr. Koracick?
420
00:21:11,227 --> 00:21:13,228
- No test kit?
- They wouldn't give me another one
421
00:21:13,263 --> 00:21:14,897
because you keep testing positive.
422
00:21:14,931 --> 00:21:17,633
But I got to level nine
on "Zombie Apocalypse."
423
00:21:17,667 --> 00:21:19,702
I didn't stop the virus,
but it's a start.
424
00:21:19,769 --> 00:21:21,070
Oh, yeah, I-I stopped that.
425
00:21:21,137 --> 00:21:23,372
You found a cure? Or a vaccine?
426
00:21:23,440 --> 00:21:27,476
Wait. Did you reach herd immunity?
427
00:21:27,544 --> 00:21:29,845
Tell me.
428
00:21:29,879 --> 00:21:30,879
I blew up the world.
429
00:21:30,947 --> 00:21:32,081
You killed everyone?
430
00:21:32,148 --> 00:21:33,949
Oh, we're all gonna die anyway.
431
00:21:34,017 --> 00:21:35,784
Well, yeah, eventually.
432
00:21:35,819 --> 00:21:37,986
Well, if by "eventually" you mean
before the year's out, then, yeah.
433
00:21:38,021 --> 00:21:40,923
I figured I'd cut to the chase.
434
00:21:47,630 --> 00:21:50,666
That was not a bridge.
435
00:21:50,700 --> 00:21:53,936
That was... What's bigger than a bridge?
436
00:21:53,970 --> 00:21:57,005
Mm, whatever that was, I guess.
437
00:21:57,040 --> 00:21:59,174
Okay. But we can't do it again.
438
00:21:59,209 --> 00:22:01,122
- No?
- No. Definitely not.
439
00:22:01,190 --> 00:22:02,631
Because then... Then we're a thing.
440
00:22:02,696 --> 00:22:03,886
We're definitely not a thing.
441
00:22:03,923 --> 00:22:04,847
Yeah, definitely not a thing.
442
00:22:04,881 --> 00:22:06,014
- Agreed.
- Not a thing.
443
00:22:06,049 --> 00:22:08,083
- It's just... However...
- Yeah?
444
00:22:08,151 --> 00:22:11,053
...if we were to not get dressed
445
00:22:11,087 --> 00:22:14,022
between the first and the...
446
00:22:14,057 --> 00:22:16,592
Yep. Yeah, mm-hmm.
You know what I'm saying?
447
00:22:16,626 --> 00:22:18,389
Then it's all really
just one experience.
448
00:22:18,413 --> 00:22:19,655
It's just one experience.
449
00:22:19,700 --> 00:22:21,463
So it's not a thing. It's just...
It's one whole experience.
450
00:22:24,868 --> 00:22:28,510
- So... he just bailed?
- Yeah.
451
00:22:28,534 --> 00:22:30,873
I knew that he had
problems with his dad,
452
00:22:30,940 --> 00:22:33,108
but I did not know they were that bad.
453
00:22:33,143 --> 00:22:34,877
Couldn't even be
in a virtual room with him.
454
00:22:34,944 --> 00:22:36,478
And I haven't heard from him since.
455
00:22:36,513 --> 00:22:38,680
You seem exceedingly calm about that.
456
00:22:38,715 --> 00:22:40,849
You know, I'm... I'm paying it forward.
457
00:22:40,917 --> 00:22:42,618
Or... backward.
458
00:22:42,652 --> 00:22:44,586
When we first reconnected in L.A.,
459
00:22:44,621 --> 00:22:48,257
I told him that I needed some
time, and he totally heard me.
460
00:22:48,291 --> 00:22:52,528
Plus, our sister's in the
hospital with COVID alone.
461
00:22:52,562 --> 00:22:54,997
It really puts things in perspective.
462
00:22:57,300 --> 00:22:59,001
I hate that we can't be with her.
463
00:22:59,035 --> 00:23:00,302
Me too.
464
00:23:04,808 --> 00:23:06,809
Is that whistling?
465
00:23:06,843 --> 00:23:08,410
That's Link.
466
00:23:08,478 --> 00:23:12,014
He is a one-man pep rally.
467
00:23:12,048 --> 00:23:13,849
And I hate that, too.
468
00:23:16,586 --> 00:23:19,154
Oh! Dr. Altman.
469
00:23:19,189 --> 00:23:20,589
Bad time?
470
00:23:20,623 --> 00:23:22,724
This virus is like
aa drunk uncle at a wedding.
471
00:23:22,759 --> 00:23:24,393
Y-You've got no idea what it's gonna do
472
00:23:24,427 --> 00:23:25,994
or when it's gonna turn on you.
473
00:23:26,062 --> 00:23:27,863
I am reading everything on COVID
474
00:23:27,897 --> 00:23:30,065
because every 24 hours
there's something new.
475
00:23:30,099 --> 00:23:32,034
And I have to keep up
because there could be one drug,
476
00:23:32,068 --> 00:23:33,569
one procedure... It could help.
477
00:23:33,603 --> 00:23:35,103
It could help everyone.
It could help Meredith Grey.
478
00:23:35,138 --> 00:23:37,039
So, yes, it's a... it's a...
It's a bad time.
479
00:23:40,043 --> 00:23:41,276
What do you need?
480
00:23:41,344 --> 00:23:42,744
Um, I was gonna tell you
481
00:23:42,779 --> 00:23:45,848
that Dr. Koracick
is in a really dark place
482
00:23:45,915 --> 00:23:47,850
and seems like he could use a friend.
483
00:23:47,917 --> 00:23:52,254
But, um, Dr. Grey is kinda
my whole world, so...
484
00:23:52,288 --> 00:23:54,223
Never mind. Proceed.
485
00:23:58,127 --> 00:24:00,729
Dave's abdominal swelling
is coming down,
486
00:24:00,797 --> 00:24:03,432
so we should be able to
close him in just a few days.
487
00:24:03,466 --> 00:24:05,467
Oh, that's great news. Thank you.
488
00:24:05,502 --> 00:24:07,870
Yeah. Just doing my job.
How are things there?
489
00:24:07,937 --> 00:24:09,443
Oh, hanging on by a thread.
490
00:24:09,478 --> 00:24:10,973
Dave's the one who keeps
this place running.
491
00:24:11,007 --> 00:24:12,574
Well, we are doing
everything we can here
492
00:24:12,609 --> 00:24:13,775
to get him back to you, okay?
493
00:24:13,843 --> 00:24:15,978
- Can I see him one more time?
- Of course.
494
00:24:16,012 --> 00:24:17,880
Rest up and come home soon, okay?
495
00:24:17,947 --> 00:24:20,449
I wish I could be there. I love you.
496
00:24:22,090 --> 00:24:23,485
It's awful that she can't visit.
497
00:24:23,520 --> 00:24:25,787
It's awful this happened
in the first place.
498
00:24:27,657 --> 00:24:29,091
Tseng, you need to step out.
499
00:24:31,698 --> 00:24:32,995
Now.
500
00:24:39,636 --> 00:24:41,436
You don't have to be so hard on her.
501
00:24:41,504 --> 00:24:43,238
She's very attached to this patient.
502
00:24:43,273 --> 00:24:45,073
She's upset that a misdiagnosis
503
00:24:45,108 --> 00:24:47,309
cost this patient the next
four weeks of his livelihood.
504
00:24:47,377 --> 00:24:49,945
Me too. Sometimes you have to
weigh the risks and make a decision.
505
00:24:49,979 --> 00:24:52,180
Right-sided diverticulitis
is extremely rare.
506
00:24:52,248 --> 00:24:54,316
But not as rare for Dave.
It's 10 times more likely
507
00:24:54,384 --> 00:24:56,685
in patients of Asian descent
than white patients.
508
00:24:56,719 --> 00:24:59,288
Which you clearly didn't know or
didn't take into consideration.
509
00:24:59,322 --> 00:25:00,822
But either way it's on you,
510
00:25:00,857 --> 00:25:03,458
'cause all this could've been
avoided with a simple scan.
511
00:25:16,339 --> 00:25:17,872
You're just getting here?
512
00:25:17,907 --> 00:25:19,941
Is that a problem?
513
00:25:19,975 --> 00:25:22,343
No. Just didn't see you when I got up.
514
00:25:22,411 --> 00:25:24,445
I figured you came in early.
515
00:25:24,480 --> 00:25:26,581
I was exercising.
516
00:25:28,250 --> 00:25:29,484
Morning.
517
00:25:30,719 --> 00:25:33,187
Oh, my God! You're back together.
518
00:25:33,255 --> 00:25:34,389
- Kind of.
- Ugh!
519
00:25:34,423 --> 00:25:36,408
Taryn said the Netherlands
520
00:25:36,433 --> 00:25:39,235
suggested people find
a designated sex partner
521
00:25:39,269 --> 00:25:40,436
for the pandemic.
522
00:25:40,470 --> 00:25:41,904
You're having sex with Nico
523
00:25:41,938 --> 00:25:44,039
because the Dutch government
recommends it?
524
00:25:44,074 --> 00:25:47,009
Their country ranks very high
on the World Happiness Index.
525
00:25:47,043 --> 00:25:48,844
He lied, dumped you.
526
00:25:48,879 --> 00:25:51,046
- He barely gives you the time of day.
- Okay, stop judging.
527
00:25:51,114 --> 00:25:53,249
It's wartime, but I still have needs.
528
00:25:53,283 --> 00:25:55,885
It's not like I'm just
gonna find someone new.
529
00:25:55,919 --> 00:25:58,187
So you're with your
emotionally unavailable ex?
530
00:25:58,221 --> 00:25:59,388
Wartime!
531
00:26:00,924 --> 00:26:05,094
Ah, the sun is out, and Scout's down.
532
00:26:05,128 --> 00:26:10,232
And everyone else is watching
a PBS show about penguins.
533
00:26:10,267 --> 00:26:13,602
Meredith's not improving.
Uh, they can't wake her.
534
00:26:13,637 --> 00:26:15,638
Well, she's getting her rest. It's good.
535
00:26:15,672 --> 00:26:17,940
No, it is not good.
None of this is good, okay?
536
00:26:18,008 --> 00:26:20,476
Do you not see that?
I am terrified for Meredith.
537
00:26:20,510 --> 00:26:23,779
I am sad. I am enraged
that this is happening.
538
00:26:23,814 --> 00:26:26,282
So, please, stop dismissing me
539
00:26:26,316 --> 00:26:28,918
with your bright sides
and your pep talks, okay?
540
00:26:28,952 --> 00:26:31,821
Let me have my fear and my grief
541
00:26:31,855 --> 00:26:33,088
and my anger.
542
00:26:33,123 --> 00:26:37,459
Because if I don't,
if I keep shoving it down,
543
00:26:37,494 --> 00:26:39,829
you will have a very hard time
544
00:26:39,863 --> 00:26:42,631
finding the bright side
to the consequences.
545
00:26:59,649 --> 00:27:00,983
What are you doing?
546
00:27:05,522 --> 00:27:08,924
I'm making some space for us to sit
547
00:27:08,959 --> 00:27:13,662
while you have all your feelings.
548
00:27:47,030 --> 00:27:49,064
Do you still dance?
549
00:27:49,132 --> 00:27:50,232
Hmm?
550
00:27:50,267 --> 00:27:51,867
When you're sad or you're stressed,
551
00:27:51,902 --> 00:27:54,837
do you still... dance it out?
552
00:27:54,871 --> 00:28:00,309
No, not so much anymore,
not since Cristina left.
553
00:28:00,343 --> 00:28:02,912
Cristina didn't die.
554
00:28:02,946 --> 00:28:04,847
I know.
555
00:28:06,016 --> 00:28:09,485
That's what I miss about being alive.
556
00:28:09,519 --> 00:28:13,222
Dancing till you drop.
557
00:28:13,290 --> 00:28:16,592
Laughing till you cry.
558
00:28:16,626 --> 00:28:19,428
Food. Textures.
559
00:28:19,462 --> 00:28:21,830
The crunch of cereal
as you eat it from the box.
560
00:28:23,934 --> 00:28:26,769
The feel of clean sheets
and a good pillow
561
00:28:26,803 --> 00:28:28,370
at the end of a long day.
562
00:28:32,976 --> 00:28:36,045
I've got the consent
forms for that clinical trial...
563
00:28:36,079 --> 00:28:37,546
...for that clinical trial...
564
00:28:41,284 --> 00:28:44,086
And there's one more space, and...
565
00:28:44,120 --> 00:28:46,655
I have to decide, and...
566
00:28:46,690 --> 00:28:50,225
it could be the best
or worst decision of my life.
567
00:28:50,260 --> 00:28:54,196
Your doctors, your friends, your family.
568
00:28:54,230 --> 00:28:55,931
They're worried about you.
569
00:28:55,966 --> 00:28:57,766
I'm trying to be strong for them,
570
00:28:57,834 --> 00:29:01,236
but I'll admit... I'm struggling.
571
00:29:02,439 --> 00:29:04,406
Seeing you there like this...
572
00:29:04,441 --> 00:29:06,875
and not knowing what to do.
573
00:29:09,179 --> 00:29:11,775
I'm sorry, Richard.
574
00:29:12,349 --> 00:29:15,384
And choices. Ahh.
575
00:29:15,418 --> 00:29:17,453
So many choices.
576
00:29:17,487 --> 00:29:20,823
So many ways to live a life.
577
00:29:20,857 --> 00:29:22,224
Meredith?
578
00:29:22,258 --> 00:29:25,294
Meredith, what is it? I'm here.
579
00:29:25,328 --> 00:29:26,795
I'm right here.
580
00:29:31,434 --> 00:29:34,003
If you stay here, it might break him.
581
00:29:38,575 --> 00:29:39,908
I know.
582
00:29:44,280 --> 00:29:47,016
I know, George.
583
00:30:02,532 --> 00:30:03,799
Get her in.
584
00:30:19,191 --> 00:30:21,960
Oh, God, I hate...
585
00:30:23,562 --> 00:30:24,762
Me?
586
00:30:24,797 --> 00:30:26,898
Every single thing except you.
587
00:30:33,539 --> 00:30:35,506
I live with Jo Wilson now.
588
00:30:35,541 --> 00:30:37,075
But she, uh...
589
00:30:37,109 --> 00:30:40,645
has not been sleeping at home.
590
00:30:40,713 --> 00:30:42,680
I want to invite you over.
591
00:30:42,715 --> 00:30:48,052
But I guess we have not
been great to each other.
592
00:30:48,087 --> 00:30:51,458
And I don't know what's really changed.
593
00:30:52,358 --> 00:30:54,086
Levi.
594
00:30:54,827 --> 00:30:58,029
There's a worldwide pandemic.
595
00:30:58,063 --> 00:31:01,199
We literally don't know if we're
gonna live to see tomorrow.
596
00:31:01,233 --> 00:31:03,501
A lot has changed.
597
00:31:08,207 --> 00:31:10,018
Yeah, okay, let's go.
598
00:31:21,520 --> 00:31:22,887
- Hey.
- Hey.
599
00:31:22,955 --> 00:31:24,522
Um...
600
00:31:24,556 --> 00:31:26,557
Our plan went to crap,
601
00:31:26,592 --> 00:31:28,626
and now we can't pretend
it didn't happen...
602
00:31:28,661 --> 00:31:30,061
I can't be in a relationship right now.
603
00:31:30,129 --> 00:31:31,996
- What?
- Sorry.
604
00:31:32,031 --> 00:31:34,165
Let me start over. That sounded rude.
605
00:31:34,199 --> 00:31:38,136
When I'm saying is, I-I jumped
right into something with Vic...
606
00:31:38,170 --> 00:31:40,171
...you know,
after breaking up with Maggie,
607
00:31:40,205 --> 00:31:43,608
who I started dating
pretty soon after April.
608
00:31:43,642 --> 00:31:46,744
So I just probably should take
some time to sort things out.
609
00:31:46,779 --> 00:31:51,449
I don't want to do anything
to hurt you or our friendship.
610
00:31:51,483 --> 00:31:57,422
Jackson, my husband left me the
same year that we got married,
611
00:31:57,456 --> 00:31:59,223
for a second time.
612
00:31:59,258 --> 00:32:00,758
I am super broken.
613
00:32:00,793 --> 00:32:03,661
Like "virtual therapy
three times a week" broken.
614
00:32:03,696 --> 00:32:05,997
And now I have to
put myself back together
615
00:32:06,031 --> 00:32:08,433
in a world that I no longer recognize,
616
00:32:08,467 --> 00:32:11,836
one that is sad and lonely
and depressing.
617
00:32:11,870 --> 00:32:16,107
So what I need is friendship and sex.
618
00:32:16,141 --> 00:32:21,612
I am not, like really not,
looking for a relationship.
619
00:32:21,647 --> 00:32:23,881
Especially with someone like you.
620
00:32:23,916 --> 00:32:26,250
- Someone like me? Okay.
- Mm-hmm.
621
00:32:26,285 --> 00:32:28,753
Yeah, you know, Mr., um, Can't Be Alone
622
00:32:28,787 --> 00:32:31,989
But Sometimes Skips Town
To Go On Nature Journeys.
623
00:32:32,024 --> 00:32:33,524
- No thanks. No.
- Oh, okay.
624
00:32:33,592 --> 00:32:34,759
But you can be friends with
625
00:32:34,793 --> 00:32:37,628
and have sex with Mr. Can't Be Alone?
626
00:32:37,663 --> 00:32:39,397
- Got it.
- Yes.
627
00:32:39,431 --> 00:32:42,433
The Netherlands has recommended
628
00:32:42,468 --> 00:32:46,404
that its residents
find a regular sex buddy
629
00:32:46,438 --> 00:32:49,140
during the pandemic for safety.
630
00:32:49,174 --> 00:32:50,608
- Sounds wise.
- Doesn't it?
631
00:32:52,411 --> 00:32:54,812
You thought I wanted to date you?!
632
00:32:54,847 --> 00:32:57,281
Well, how is that...
Why is that so funny?
633
00:33:04,790 --> 00:33:06,290
Hey. Uh...
634
00:33:06,325 --> 00:33:09,026
You mind if I, uh...
635
00:33:09,061 --> 00:33:11,796
Okay, well, sit over there.
636
00:33:18,303 --> 00:33:20,438
Okay. Hypothetical.
637
00:33:20,472 --> 00:33:23,107
Asian-American male presents with fever,
638
00:33:23,142 --> 00:33:26,177
high white blood cell count,
and right lower quadrant pain.
639
00:33:26,211 --> 00:33:28,179
Oh, is this the restaurant guy?
640
00:33:28,213 --> 00:33:29,680
I caught him in the ER.
641
00:33:29,715 --> 00:33:32,316
Bailey, I see a dozen
presentations like that a month.
642
00:33:32,351 --> 00:33:33,918
All appendicitis.
643
00:33:33,952 --> 00:33:36,154
But if I'm honest, in that moment,
644
00:33:36,188 --> 00:33:37,822
I-I didn't give it much thought.
645
00:33:37,856 --> 00:33:40,758
I just... He was... He was any patient.
646
00:33:40,793 --> 00:33:42,760
Any non-Asian patient.
647
00:33:42,795 --> 00:33:44,796
I defaulted to a standard of care.
648
00:33:44,863 --> 00:33:47,665
That's centered around white patients.
649
00:33:50,669 --> 00:33:53,738
I never want to make that mistake again.
650
00:33:53,772 --> 00:33:55,232
There is no excuse.
651
00:33:55,302 --> 00:33:57,275
You know, when you're dealing
with a high patient count,
652
00:33:57,309 --> 00:33:59,710
you have to make judgment calls,
you know?
653
00:33:59,745 --> 00:34:02,947
You... You have to ask, what is
the most likely problem, right?
654
00:34:02,981 --> 00:34:04,682
So there's no excuses,
655
00:34:04,750 --> 00:34:06,717
other than the excuses
you just listed off?
656
00:34:06,752 --> 00:34:08,419
That's not what I meant.
657
00:34:08,453 --> 00:34:09,453
Ha!
658
00:34:09,521 --> 00:34:12,323
I just want to treat everyone equally.
659
00:34:12,357 --> 00:34:15,560
Equal doesn't work for everybody, Hunt.
660
00:34:15,594 --> 00:34:18,830
I-It's about equity...
Patients getting what they need,
661
00:34:18,864 --> 00:34:21,299
whether it fits into a protocol or not.
662
00:34:21,333 --> 00:34:24,969
Look, I just put my parents
in assisted living,
663
00:34:25,003 --> 00:34:28,973
and I can't stop worrying
that they won't get enough care
664
00:34:29,007 --> 00:34:33,010
because... there are
so few Black folks there.
665
00:34:33,078 --> 00:34:35,847
Meanwhile, my dad's freaked out
666
00:34:35,881 --> 00:34:38,983
because on his floor
the nurses are male.
667
00:34:39,051 --> 00:34:42,587
In his mind, good nurses
are female, period.
668
00:34:42,621 --> 00:34:46,924
So we all have biases, Hunt,
including you.
669
00:34:46,992 --> 00:34:49,894
What matters now
is what you do about it.
670
00:34:49,928 --> 00:34:51,762
You're the chief of trauma.
671
00:34:51,797 --> 00:34:53,564
If the protocols don't work,
672
00:34:53,599 --> 00:34:56,745
then read, learn...
673
00:34:57,202 --> 00:35:00,371
question... and change them.
674
00:35:09,681 --> 00:35:10,948
Kids are asleep.
675
00:35:18,757 --> 00:35:22,521
And... it's your turn to talk.
676
00:35:23,061 --> 00:35:24,428
I'm good.
677
00:35:26,765 --> 00:35:30,167
Link, everything sucks right
now. You can talk about it.
678
00:35:30,202 --> 00:35:31,702
Yeah. Yeah. I could do that.
679
00:35:31,770 --> 00:35:35,406
If you want me to be...
miserable and resentful.
680
00:35:35,440 --> 00:35:37,275
Resentful of me?
681
00:35:37,309 --> 00:35:39,076
For trying to listen?
682
00:35:39,111 --> 00:35:40,578
No, of making me talk
683
00:35:40,612 --> 00:35:44,248
when clearly all I want to do
is play my damn guitar.
684
00:35:45,918 --> 00:35:47,285
You can't keep everything bottled up.
685
00:35:47,319 --> 00:35:48,753
No, no, you can't, Amelia.
686
00:35:48,820 --> 00:35:50,421
That's how you process feelings.
687
00:35:50,455 --> 00:35:52,924
That's how you cope.
And I'm okay with that.
688
00:35:52,958 --> 00:35:57,461
But... I've been through
"everything sucks."
689
00:35:57,529 --> 00:36:00,631
Illness and isolation.
690
00:36:00,666 --> 00:36:03,067
When I had cancer.
When... When my parents split.
691
00:36:03,101 --> 00:36:04,902
I was so depressed that I could...
692
00:36:04,937 --> 00:36:07,405
I could barely get out of bed
for the better part of a year.
693
00:36:07,439 --> 00:36:09,192
And I was 11.
694
00:36:10,642 --> 00:36:13,244
Then I met a kid at cancer camp.
695
00:36:13,312 --> 00:36:15,046
Morrow Willis.
696
00:36:15,080 --> 00:36:16,714
Kid was probably sicker than I was,
697
00:36:16,782 --> 00:36:19,116
but he didn't want to talk
about treatments or symptoms.
698
00:36:19,151 --> 00:36:21,652
Just sports and "Mario Kart."
699
00:36:21,687 --> 00:36:25,957
So I said to myself, "What if
I just focus on the good stuff?"
700
00:36:26,024 --> 00:36:27,458
And I tried it.
701
00:36:27,492 --> 00:36:31,662
And it turns out
that's what works for me.
702
00:36:31,697 --> 00:36:33,564
That's what I need.
703
00:36:33,598 --> 00:36:35,399
And if you're okay with that, great,
704
00:36:35,434 --> 00:36:38,269
but if you need a partner
in misery, I'm not your guy.
705
00:36:46,511 --> 00:36:48,481
Whatcha playing?
706
00:36:49,314 --> 00:36:50,948
Just a little something I made up.
707
00:36:50,983 --> 00:36:54,618
It's called, uh,
"If the Virus Doesn't End Us,
708
00:36:54,653 --> 00:36:57,321
Then Climate Change
Probably Will Blues."
709
00:37:09,835 --> 00:37:11,268
Hey.
710
00:37:11,336 --> 00:37:13,938
Hey. Wasn't sure you'd answer.
711
00:37:13,972 --> 00:37:16,440
Please. The woman who all
but ghosted you for a month
712
00:37:16,475 --> 00:37:17,942
does not get to judge.
713
00:37:19,144 --> 00:37:21,979
It's just, uh... my dad.
714
00:37:22,014 --> 00:37:23,614
We don't have to talk about it
715
00:37:23,648 --> 00:37:26,650
if you're not ready to
or if you don't want to.
716
00:37:26,685 --> 00:37:30,888
It makes me crazy because he...
He seems like he's all charm,
717
00:37:30,922 --> 00:37:33,791
but he has got this temper that...
718
00:37:33,859 --> 00:37:38,129
Well, if you're serious about
not talking about it right now,
719
00:37:38,163 --> 00:37:39,530
that can wait...
720
00:37:39,564 --> 00:37:42,333
because the things I want
to do with you tonight...
721
00:37:42,401 --> 00:37:43,934
they can't.
722
00:37:43,969 --> 00:37:48,539
Oh, well, I'm going to need you
to say more about that.
723
00:37:48,573 --> 00:37:50,074
Alright, alright. Hold on. Let me, uh...
724
00:37:50,108 --> 00:37:51,642
Let me try to share my screen.
725
00:37:51,676 --> 00:37:53,944
- Oh, my God.
- What?
726
00:37:55,280 --> 00:37:56,914
Are we gonna watch porn?
727
00:37:56,948 --> 00:37:58,716
No.
728
00:37:58,784 --> 00:38:00,584
"Coming to America."
729
00:38:01,887 --> 00:38:03,154
Mm-hmm.
730
00:38:03,221 --> 00:38:06,891
Yes! Please! Ahh!
731
00:38:06,925 --> 00:38:08,592
Ugh!
732
00:38:08,627 --> 00:38:10,027
Okay.
733
00:38:12,531 --> 00:38:14,665
Hey, Tom?!
734
00:38:14,733 --> 00:38:16,867
Tom, it's me!
735
00:38:20,138 --> 00:38:23,374
I brought you soup
and I know that you're home!
736
00:38:23,442 --> 00:38:27,078
It's that really excellent soup
from that little Polish place.
737
00:38:30,649 --> 00:38:32,293
Tom...
738
00:38:32,918 --> 00:38:35,052
I know... I know
that I am the last person
739
00:38:35,087 --> 00:38:36,320
that you want to see.
740
00:38:36,354 --> 00:38:37,955
I just... I don't know.
741
00:38:37,989 --> 00:38:39,924
I thought maybe we could talk
through the door.
742
00:38:39,991 --> 00:38:44,862
I just feel like you need some
semblance of human contact.
743
00:38:44,930 --> 00:38:48,933
I don't blame you for... for
wanting to keep your distance,
744
00:38:48,967 --> 00:38:50,734
I mean, pandemic or not.
745
00:38:57,142 --> 00:38:59,944
I just want you to know
that you're not alone.
746
00:39:12,023 --> 00:39:14,725
Experts say the more resilient we are,
747
00:39:14,759 --> 00:39:17,027
the better we can face
life's challenges.
748
00:39:26,972 --> 00:39:29,106
I was so mad at you.
749
00:39:29,141 --> 00:39:31,060
What, for leaving you?
750
00:39:31,476 --> 00:39:34,178
For choosing someone over yourself.
751
00:39:34,212 --> 00:39:36,347
I didn't know I was gonna die.
752
00:39:37,000 --> 00:39:38,282
Do you regret it?
753
00:39:41,119 --> 00:39:43,521
Does that matter?
754
00:39:43,555 --> 00:39:46,157
You'd have done the same thing.
Isn't that why you're here?
755
00:39:49,100 --> 00:39:51,095
Yeah. I guess.
756
00:39:51,163 --> 00:39:52,363
So it's your fault.
757
00:39:54,366 --> 00:39:56,200
How do you figure?
758
00:39:58,170 --> 00:40:00,006
Because you...
759
00:40:00,872 --> 00:40:03,707
went all-in for everybody.
760
00:40:03,742 --> 00:40:07,347
Your friends, your family,
a woman at the bus stop.
761
00:40:07,913 --> 00:40:09,680
You think that didn't somehow affect me?
762
00:40:11,516 --> 00:40:13,937
You changed my life, George.
763
00:40:14,419 --> 00:40:16,854
I didn't say it then, but it's true.
764
00:40:16,888 --> 00:40:19,990
And the single biggest factor
for cultivating resilience?
765
00:40:22,694 --> 00:40:25,062
Positive relationships.
766
00:40:36,508 --> 00:40:40,211
For what it's worth, I think
you made the right call,
767
00:40:40,245 --> 00:40:42,048
putting her in the trial.
768
00:40:42,882 --> 00:40:45,760
I've known Meredith
since she was a child.
769
00:40:47,219 --> 00:40:51,922
I watched her operate
on her dolls in the OR gallery.
770
00:40:51,957 --> 00:40:56,527
I took her for milk and cookies
in the cafeteria.
771
00:40:56,561 --> 00:40:59,597
I helped her get over her fear
of the film review room
772
00:40:59,631 --> 00:41:02,266
because that's where she thought
we kept the skeletons.
773
00:41:05,470 --> 00:41:10,034
And then I watched her
become a surgeon, a wife...
774
00:41:10,942 --> 00:41:14,812
a mother, and a chief.
775
00:41:16,481 --> 00:41:21,285
You know, I knew COVID patients
had to suffer in isolation.
776
00:41:21,319 --> 00:41:25,522
But I never gave any thought
to how helpless
777
00:41:25,557 --> 00:41:28,125
and alone it feels
778
00:41:28,193 --> 00:41:30,527
for the people who care about them.
779
00:42:03,495 --> 00:42:05,729
So find your people...
780
00:42:07,032 --> 00:42:08,132
...and keep them close.
781
00:42:12,504 --> 00:42:15,105
Because when you're at your lowest...
782
00:42:19,844 --> 00:42:22,546
...those people get you through.
57205
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