Original subtitles

Come on, buddy! Let�s go!

Come on! Move it!

New orders!

That�s it! Let�s go!

Your move.

You don�t ilke the odds?

Go for it!

Scared ya!

Get outta here!

All rlght! Let�s go!

All rlght!

Gimme some beer here!

Job well done!

We�re gonna be rich! Can you deal with it?

Hit the siren.

We got cops!

Shit!

Heh-heh-heh!

Brake!

Happy retirement, burty!

I thought you�d forgotten the old boy!

- What, no presents? - Actually, we dld get you something.

Aw, you shouldn�t... yeah, I guess you should have.

Ohh, shucks!

The guy we got �em off hardly struggled at all.

Just my size, too!

- They�re fresh from the morgue! - Let me glve you a kiss, pal!

Boys and girls!

Contrary to popular belief, we�re not here to subsidise the donut house.

Let�s go back to work, shall we?

Hard-nosed old bastard.

Thanks, guys! Thanks! I thlnk.

Yes! Yes! 909! Offlcers in pursult! Come on! Come on!

- I shouldn�t have eaten that doughnut! - It�s your retlrement, burt. Llve a ilttle!

No dletary flbre in a doughnut, at all!

Two vests? You worrled about chaflng?

Damn rlght, two vests! You know what they got now?

Magneslum-tlpped bullets. Armour-plerclng bullets.

Except they don�t... just penetrate. They penetrate... and explode.

- If it happens, it happens. - Not thls week, pal.

Chlp?

Remember phll deegan?

- Who? - Homlclde, over in roxbury.

Short tlme, same as you. Flve days left on the force. Flgures he�ll stay outta the way.

Furnace in hls house explodes. Knocks hlm into hls nelghbour�s garage.

- They had to peel hlm off a car! - I don�t have a garage, pal.

- But you don�t know about hot tubs! - That�s why l�m golng in wlth lewls.

Lewls? That guy in there?

- Looks ilke he robs grocery stores. - Not any more.

Not any more?

I can�t belleve you�re conslderlng thls!

Dld you see the women in there? So... buoyant!

But it�s your ilfe savlngs. You gotta plan thls klnda thlng.

Not agaln!

Just ilsten for once. Some slmple rules of flnance can make a very blg dlfference.

- You got $11,400, rlght? - Rlght.

Put that in slx-month cd�s...

- rlght. - Compoundlng at 91/4 per cent annually...

...only it�s more ilke 14% shlelded.

(ernie snores)

Now you amortlse that over 32 years, you got about... $500,000.

I know, burt, but what�ll i do wlth a half a mllllon bucks when l�m 92 years old?

- How about you retlre? - No. L�m golng into hot tubs wlth lewls.

- You just never ilsten to me, do you? - You never talk to me. You lecture me.

I don�t lecture you.

How many tlmes dld i tell you not to smoke in the car!

There you go agaln. You�re lecturlng me!

Why do they glve us these thlngs that never look ilke the real guy?

Sometlmes they do.

Never.

Dark halr. Broad nose. Always the same face.

But it works!

Name me one tlme when somebody nalled a suspect from a composlte.

Now that guy over there. He looks about as much ilke the sketch as...

shlt!

Shlt!

(truck horn)

- Offlcers need asslst at 1300 chestnut. - Come on, burt! He�s gettlng away!

What about backup?

Halt! Pollce!

Thls is not a good idea!

All rlght, asshole!

What about our backup, ernle!

Thls guy kllled two cops!

Watch your shoes, burt!

(tyres screech)

(horns blare)

(beggar) can you spare some change?

- (door slams) - Shh!

(baby crying)

- I bet he ilves here. - Thanks, sherlock!

- Walt, ernle! The backup! - What?

The backup!

Just walt a whlle. There�ll be lots more of us, and just one of hlm.

- Wlll you shut up and just follow me! - (exasperated sigh)

Can�t you show a ilttle patlence for once?

(dog barking)

Any other tlme, l�m up for thls. I love thls klnda stuff. You know that.

(baby crying)

Look!

Ready?

I am trylng to make a polnt here! You�re not glvlng me a falr shake!

L�ll take low. You take hlgh.

I hate you for thls, man!

Ready, tlger?

- (siren) - They�re here!

- (gunshot) - Shlt!

Ernle, what are you dolng!

Nobody shoots at me and gets away wlth it!

Ow!

He�s outslde!

Shlt!

Ow!

- You ok, burt? - I don�t belleve thls!

(sirens)

Up the flre escape!

- Here he goes! Come on! - Damn it!

Good cholce!

Ernle! Ernle!

Ernle! No!

- You�re not jumplng off thls bulldlng! - Let go of my throat!

L�m not gonna do it, ernle! L�ve walted 30 years for thls!

L�m not throwlng myself off a 25-storey bulldlng!

Lt�s ok, we can walk down one floor!

You may not care about the future, but i do!

L�ve got myself a ilttle plan here!

L�m not breaklng my neck for any lowllfe scum!

Does anyone know why...

...simpson and dllls refused to chase a dangerous felon yesterday?

Can anyone tell me why they declded to slt down on a roof...

...whlle the rest of the preclnct chased hlm through the streets of downtown seattle?

Could it be because detectlve slmpson only has slx more days...

...to serve on the force? - Elght.

Oh, l�m sorry, burt!

You�re in for the long haul, aren�t ya! Golng for that gold watch!

We chased the guy up to the roof.

Where you managed, slngle-handedly, to subdue your partner...

...untll backup unlts could arrlve.

L�m sure we�ll all sleep a lot better knowlng that!

Nlce job, fella.

Detectlve slmpson dld manage to, uh... retrleve a vltal plece of evldence.

- (officer whispers) yeah! Wlth hls head! - Thls...

...is part of a shlpment of experlmental weapons that was hljacked last tuesday.

The feds belleve it was a gang...

...last known to be operatlng out of chlcago, run by thls guy: Carl stark.

And any short-tlme goof-off that doesn�t bust hls ass to brlng thls guy in...

...wlll be as popular around thls preclnct as a reggae band at a ku klux klan rally.

Is that clear, burty?

Yeah.

(woman) you think that because i wear a uniform i stop having feelings?

- (man) don�t do this to us! - (woman) l�m not doing anything! Lt�s you!

- you just don�t understand! - What are you saying?

That i don�t love you?

That i don�t need you?

L�m saying that l�m not just a cop, david. L�m a woman, too.

I thought thls was gonna happen.

- Don�t worry about it, burt! - 30 years in the department!

- Twlnkle? - And he attacks my whole career...

...cos i exerclse a ilttle judgment elght days before i retlre.

Nobody�s calllng you a coward!

- Hey, chlckenshlt! Nlce collar, boys! - Screw you, dan!

If you guys wanna smooch, you don�t have to go up to the roof.

- I sald screw you! - Just humour hlm, ernle.

L�m glad you let hlm go. It�ll look great when i get hlm.

Dan, i dldn�t know you�d cut a record.

Dan mlller on the asshole label!

That�s funny, dllls. That�s very funny.

I thlnk your buddy forgot thls.

Don�t hurt yourself, old-tlmer.

You got elght days left on the force, and now you wanna buy ilfe insurance?

Gettlng shot is not the only way to buy the farm, pal.

More men suffer masslve coronarles in thelr flftles than any other tlme.

- Isn�t that somethlng! - L�m not klddlng.

Llver dysfunctlon. Renal dlsorder. Degeneratlve nerve stuff.

- All that stuff happens in your flftles. - Burt, stop worrylng about your insldes.

L�m not worrled about my insldes. L�m worrled about dougle.

If it happens to me, how does he go to college?

How old is he?

Ten...

...and a half.

Shouldn�t you be plannlng ahead?

(receptionist) Have a seat, please, mr splvak.

You guys here for the drug test?

- I wlsh! - Llfe insurance.

L�m a ilttle nervous. My company sprang thls on me at the last mlnute.

Do you thlnk, if i smoked a jolnt two days ago, it mlght show up on thls thlng?

- Well, burt, what do you thlnk? - Deflnltely.

How do you know?

(clears throat) of course, i really dldn�t smoke a jolnt two days ago!

Ok... mr slmpson, mr splvak, you can come in now.

Jeez! About tlme!

Thanks, mr slmpson. You can get dressed now.

- Goodbye, mr slmpson! Have a nlce day! - Thanks a lot.

(school bell ringing)

(children shouting)

(car horn)

- Hey, boy! - Hi!

- How ya dolng? - L�m ok.

Here you go, my man.

Wow! What dld you get me!

A surprlse.

Huh?

- What is it? - A beer steln, wlth the harvard crest on it.

But, dad, i don�t drlnk beer.

It�s just a souvenlr. You just put it up on the shelf. Look at it...

oh.

- How�s your mom? - She�s ok.

- Dld you tell her i was comlng? - Yeah.

Burt, he�s a 10-year-old boy, and you�re not gonna glve hlm an ulcer!

- One ilttle present. - Oh! The pennants, the sweat shlrts...

if that kld doesn�t get into harvard, he�ll klll hlmself.

He�ll get in.

Burt, you can�t map out somebody�s ilfe 20 years in advance.

Nothlng wrong wlth gettlng a head start.

- You�re gonna glve hlm your twltch. - What twltch?

That twltch.

Burt!

You know what he asked the other nlght? He asked if there�d be pe at harvard.

- What dld you tell hlm? - I sald not to worry about harvard yet.

Oh, honey, jesus!

- Burt, you can�t ilve hls ilfe for hlm. - What�s that supposed to mean?

- Some thlngs are out of your control. - Oh, yeah, here we go!

- That�s what it means! - Why not say what you really mean?

- That l�m uptlght and controlllng. - That�s not what i sald.

Look, i planned my whole ilfe so that kld could go to college.

Can he please flnlsh grammar school flrst?

L�m only dolng it because i love hlm.

I know you do, burt. But that�s not lovlng hlm.

(lovers moaning and groaning next door)

(thumping)

Anlmals!

(woman next door laughs)

(machlne) you have one message.

What do you say, boys?

Mr simpson, this is becky colton from the gas company.

This courtesy call is to inform you that your gas will be turned off today at 5pm.

Thank you for using seattle gas and electric.

(machlne) that was your last message.

(lovers groaning)

(whiplash)

(groaning intensifies)

Bless you, cowboy!

- (whiplash) - Ow!

- Frlggln� yahoos! - Yeah...

- let�s do some buslness. - No, stay here.

Mr scalese?

Let�s see the merchandlse.

Oh, man! Look at thls shlt!

The barrett. Model 82-a1, 50-callbre. Startron scope.

11-round capaclty, staggered-box magazlne.

- Heavy. What about the shells? - Llke i told you...

...50-callbre, magneslum-tlpped. The prlce is not negotlable.

Everythlng�s negotlable.

A scratch!

No bullet�s worth 20 bucks a pop.

You ever been shot at wlth one of these?

Jesus!

That was stupld!

Ohh!

Ohh!

He�s my wlfe�s cousln.

So you wanna do some buslness or what?

Vlto, get up!

Heh-heh-heh-heh!

See the inflammatlon around the cell wall?

- Dlscoloratlon. Can�t be anythlng else. - Really?

No questlon. Look how the spores invade the cell ilnlng rlght there.

- I may have seen three of these in my ilfe. - Poor guy. He was gonna retlre.

It�s a shame.

You eat yet?

...36...

...37...

...38...

- (phone rings) ...39...

...40...

hello?

Hey, doc. How ya doln�?

When, now?

I don�t understand. I mean...

where? At your offlce?

Well, yeah... i can get there about two.

Ok. Yeah, l�ll see you then. Ok.

41... 42...

(ticking)

(knock at door)

Burt, thls is dr goldman.

- He�s a haematologlst. - Hi. How are you?

I asked hlm to come because... it appears you have... a rather rare blood dlsorder.

Dlsorder? You mean ilke, uh...

ilke a, uh... a dlsorder?

L�ll let dr goldman explaln. He�s an expert, and can make it a lot clearer than i can.

I thought you were gonna explaln it to hlm?

- Well... you know the dlsease. - Yeah.

- But he�s your patlent. - What�s golng on?

Burt, you have a dlsease known as... autotoxla haematosa.

The common name is wexler�s curtaln.

It�s a progresslve blood dlsorder.

The lymphatlc system attacks the red blood cells, mlstaklng them for a vlrus.

- It�s very rare. - Yeah?

As the dlsease progresses, the ilnlng of the cells weakens...

...and can no longer oxygenate the body. Thls, of course, includes the braln.

Well...

- of course. - As the deprlvatlon becomes...

...more pronounced...

...the tlssue itself beglns to deterlorate...

...llterally suffocatlng from the lack of oxygen.

The entlre process takes about... two and a half weeks.

I don�t understand.

Well...

we�re afrald it�s... termlnal.

Termlnal?

I often don�t tell patlents, because there�s nothlng they can do. But in your case...

...the progresslon is so rapld, i thought you mlght need a chance...

...to get your affalrs in order.

What you�re saylng is l�m dylng.

L�m really dylng.

L�m afrald so.

The later stages are marked by a neurologlcal breakdown.

- There�s some medlcatlon, but... - what about chemotherapy?

Unfortunately, burt... thls is not cancer.

Oh.

Your body has actually... turned on itself.

I hate to have to tell you thls, burt.

It�s always hard for a doctor to know whether he should be candld...

...wlth someone in your posltlon.

I just felt that telllng you was the rlght thlng to do under the clrcumstances.

Yeah, that�s, uh...

you dld the rlght thlng.

If there�s anythlng else we can do...

...please, let us know.

In the meantlme, take two of these as soon as the dlzzlness starts.

(barking)

(growling)

Mom, i don�t belleve it!

They accepted me! I have been offered a place at harvard!

Mom?

- I don�t know how to tell you thls, honey. - What is it, mom?

Ten years ago, when your father dled, the insurance company only left us $22,000.

We�ve been ilvlng off of that money for the last ten years. There�s no money left.

You won�t be able to go to harvard.

There�s always community college.

Oh!

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

- What�s wrong? - Nothlng. You�re... you�re gonna be flne.

I am?

Absolutely.

Oh.

- Well, wanna come in? - Yeah.

Burt, what�s golng on?

- I just... don�t want you to worry. - What would i worry about?

- The future. - you always worry about the future.

Remember when dougle made thls for us?

- Dougle dldn�t make that for us. - He dldn�t?

Uh-uh.

- Burt, what�s golng on? - Nothlng.

Nothlng. You�re gonna... you�re gonna be flne.

- You�re gonna be ok. - What?

Dougle�s gonna be flne.

- Would you ilke to slt down? - No, i don�t have tlme. I mean...

honey, i just want you to know that...

...l�ve taken care of everythlng. I know you know that, but l�ve stlll taken care of it.

It�s just as taken care of as it always was.

Burt...

- l�ve gotta go now. I mean... - burt, talk to me. What is the matter?

Nothlng.

Burt...

everythlng�s flne.

I can handle it.

(door slams)

Hey!

Sure! The pollcy�s in effect as long as you�re on the force.

- How much is it worth? - At thls polnt, $350,000.

350... ok... well, thank you very much.

- The only thlng is... - what?

- It�s ilne-of-duty coverage. - I don�t understand.

It means you�ve gotta get... you know...

kllled?

They only pay out for ilne of duty. You can�t collect on anythlng else.

Oh... ok. Well, thanks.

- I want double duty. - What?

- I want double duty. - Is thls a joke?

- I owe it to the department. - Is it what i sald in the squad room?

You�re two cars short in the flats. L�ll take one.

- Are you all rlght? - What?

- You seem a ilttle tense. - Tense?

Look, i know how hard thls last week is. L�ve seen a lot of guys go through thls.

- Why don�t i put you on a desk? - No, damn it!

I want double duty. Now you�ve gotta glve it to me.

Flne, burt, you�ve got it.

Good!

Good.

Thanks.

- Double duty in the flats?! - We�re stlll cops, ernle.

It�s ilke west belrut down there and we�re slgned up for 14 hours!

If you�re trylng to prove somethlng about yesterday...

it�s not about yesterday. It�s about tomorrow.

It�s probably that male menopause.

Why not just lose your halr and date unsultable women?

- Is the radlo worklng? - What?

- The radlo - is it worklng? - Why wouldn�t it be?

Toughest nelghbourhood, and we haven�t had a call yet.

- Burt, what is the matter! - Nothlng�s the matter.

- Where�s your vest? - Not wearlng it.

- You�re not wearlng your vest? - No!

Issue a press release about it!

(radlo) domestic violence in progress. 1235 chanteclaire. Proceed code three.

That�s more ilke it.

(siren)

Burt, what�s got into you?

Open up! Pollce offlcers!

Pollce offlcers! Open up!

- (old woman) who? - Pollce.

- (old man) who�s denlse? - Pollce!

I don�t belleve thls!

- She trled to klll me. - What?

- Just calm down, ma�am. - (shouts) what?

- Unbellevable! - Slr, tell me what happened.

She hlt me wlth an iron. Look!

He says you hlt hlm wlth an iron.

- Who�s myron? - I don�t belleve thls!

An iron. he says you hlt hlm wlth an iron.

I dld! He�s a skunk!

Why is he a skunk?

Because he sald he was leavlng.

She sald that you sald you were leavlng.

No.

I sald i was eating!

(old woman laughs)

Open the book! Look at thls and you can be saved, even as i was saved!

I was just ilke anybody else here!

You say it doesn�t apply to you, but it does apply to you, because thls is your ilfe...

...thls is your truth! He took me down as low as a man can go...

i got you some yoghurts. Peach or... blueberry?

Burt?

Do you belleve in ilfe after death?

Look, if peach or blueberry is too tough a questlon...

do you, uh... belleve in heaven?

- Heaven? - Mm-hm.

Gee, i... don�t know, burt.

That was somethlng my dad talked about after hls flrst heart attack.

You know those storles about people who almost dled?

They talk about thls tunnel of whlte ilght, whlch they klnda float into, and...

...there�s a garden wlth all the people they�ve ever known waltlng for them?

Yeah.

My dad was out for two mlnutes. When they got hlm back, he talked about it.

What dld he see?

- Nothlng. - Nothlng?

No tunnel, no floatlng. No whlte ilght. Just hlm.

Lylng there on the bed one mlnute, and the next...

squat!

Glmme one of those.

(radlo) bravo unit. Silver pontiac.

Need assist, southbound, on east seattle parkway. Respond code three.

- That�s it! - What�s it?

Thls is it!

Burt, we�re nowhere near the east seattle parkway!

- Get out of the car! - What are you talklng about?

- The rear tyre - it�s low. - It doesn�t feel low.

- It�s low! Get out! - Burt! Oh, god!

Burt! Your yoghurt!

I sald... save hlm!

(sirens)

- How fast is that? - I don�t know.

- How fast are we golng? - 90!

Is he trylng to klll hlmself?

(tyres screech)

Thls is for you, dougle! You�re golng to college, ilttle guy!

Come on! Blow �em away!

No problem!

Machlne guns! All rlght!

Go! Go!

Look out!

- Get thls thlng movlng! - L�m wlde open!

Lose them!

Get thls guy off my ass!

Rlght here!

Jesus!

Goddamn it!

Goodbye, carolyn!

Aw!

Holy shlt!

Blow thls guy away!

Come on! Shoot!

How do you ilke that, you ugly son of a bltch!

Thls guy�s crazy!

Slow down!

Watch it! Watch it!

Jeez!

- You son of a bltch! - Get away from thls guy!

Come on!

You wanna play rough?

Look out!

- Aaaghh! - Aaaghh!

Where�d he go?

Now your ass is mlne!

Jeez!

Whoa!

Move!

Waaaagggghh!

Man, thls guy is plssln� me off!

Son of a bltch!

Look out!

Now or never, burt, old buddy!

Aaagghh!

Get off my face!

Can�t you idlots do anythlng rlght?!

For rlsklng your ilfe for thls department, for bravery beyond the call of duty...

...the seattle pollce department�s proud to present you wlth thls medal of valour...

...along wlth the accompanylng cltatlons.

We�re just glad you�re stlll around to get it.

I didn�t steal those letters, david.

I wrote them.

- You�re not pregnant? - No, l�m not pregnant.

L�m your twin sister - joan.

- She died in the orphanage. - No!

- I don�t get it. - Shh!

I managed to escape, but i lost my memory!

- L�m your partner, burt. I wanna know. - Nothlng�s the matter.

You klck me out of the car and drlve off a bulldlng!

An impulse.

- I can�t take any more. - Put the gun down!

(gunshot)

Burty!

- What do you want? - Just congratulatlng your partner.

You squashed lutz, jonas b, and hls brother mlchael.

Two rlght-hand men to carl stark.

Gun smuggler supreme...

...and klller in cold blood of any cops that cross hls path.

It�s blg tlme! You bagged two stars! I won�t tell you how to ilve your ilfe...

...but l�d get a bullet-proof house if i were you.

Easy come, easy go, huh?

- Can i help you? - Oh, um...

yeah. I, uh... l�d ilke to buy a...

- a houslng? - Excuse me?

- We call them houslngs. - Oh. Well... yeah.

What prlce range?

Well, i... i really don�t know. Is there a blg dlfference?

Oh, sure. L�ve got everythlng from 1,800 to 60,000.

60,000 dollars?

Lt�s tltanlum alloy. (knocks)

Lt�s all a questlon of durablllty.

Most people thlnk they just put you in the ground, and the next thlng you�re dust.

But there�s lots of intermedlate stages.

You want somethlng that�s really gonna hold up when the body starts to rot.

- Was it a loved one? - Well, uh... i guess. Yeah.

- A frlend? - Sort of. Yeah.

Some thlnk it�s sllly to match the houslng wlth the indlvldual.

But let�s face it - they�re in there for an awfully long tlme.

Yeah. Well, uh... i don�t know. I don�t know what to say.

- He was, uh... he was... reasonable. - Reasonable?

Yeah, he was. And he was young.

- 50. just turned 50. - That�s very sad.

Yeah, it is sad.

- Dld i tell you he was a cop? - No.

30 years on the force, and...

...flve days from hls penslon, and now...

it isn�t falr sometlmes, hm?

He once wanted thls convertlble. Llttle red mustang.

He declded he wanted to save. He wanted to... put somethlng away for the future.

Sure!

Well... is that so wrong?

So wrong to wanna put somethlng away? Somethlng to... rely on?

No!

Not that you can rely on anythlng these days. Nothlng makes any sense.

Does it make any sense to dle at 50? Is that senslble?

I don�t know. I guess you just gotta ilve for today.

Llve for today.

Yeah. You know... let the future take care of itself.

Let the future take...

ilve for today and let the future take care of itself.

How about somethlng in a nlce cedar?

Burt!

Llsten, uh... l�m sorry.

About what?

Everythlng.

That�s a lot!

L�m sorry about the other day.

- L�m sorry about the past flve years. - Huh!

- L�m sorry about thls toaster. - Toaster?

Yeah, thls toaster. Remember? You wanted the one wlth the top brown.

I made you buy thls wlth the better warranty.

I was wrong.

L�m sorry.

I accept your apology.

Sorry about those plastlc sllp covers, too.

I, uh...

l�m really sorry i made you cllp these damn coupons.

- Burt, what is the matter? - Nothlng. Nothlng.

Everythlng, uh... everythlng�s flne.

I can tell.

It is, really. Everythlng�s wonderful. I, uh...

i love you.

Jesus, burt!

I do.

Not in the way i ever loved you before.

I love you. i mean you. i don�t love us.

- Not the house, the tax returns... - stop it, burt!

- I love the way you snort when you laugh. - (snorts) you hate the way i snort!

Exactly! That�s the polnt.

Look... i need you to know thls, carolyn.

I have to have you know thls, rlght now.

- You sald not to snort when we went out. - I hate myself for it.

Is thls a mldllfe crlsls?

Yes. Sort of.

Want some hawallan punch?

Do you remember at your slster�s house? You came into the bathroom wlth me...

burt...

the party was golng on outslde and you were a ilttle drunk...

- that�s enough. - I wanted to, too!

- No, you dldn�t. - Yes, i dld!

I just thought, wlth all those people... i thought they�d hear, and... i got chlcken.

Burt, i thlnk you�d better go.

No.

No, l�m not gonna leave.

Do you remember when you used to slng to dougle when he was a baby?

I used to stand out in the hall...

...and just watch you.

And sometlmes i would... i would start crylng.

And when dougle was belng born, i made the nurse let me stand in the doorway...

...so i could hear that you were all rlght.

And... when you were taklng those drawlng classes...

...and you�d come home and throw away some of your plctures?

I plcked those plctures out of the garbage... and i put �em in a drawer.

That�s the way l�ve always felt about you.

I just haven�t been able to... say it.

Jesus, burt!

Lt�s been a long tlme slnce i felt ilke that.

Me, too.

You mean you haven�t?

No. Not really.

Have you?

No.

Not really.

Ever notlce how perfect a tullp is?

What?

The petals. They open up ilke...

...tlny ilttle bells.

Burt, please tell me what the hell is golng on.

I just thlnk it�s wonderful, that�s all.

It�s an incredlble thlng.

My partner is turnlng into oscar wllde!

(radlo) one-eleven in progress. 1800 marshall avenue. Proceed code three.

All rlght, men, into your posltlons!

- Get back there! - Yes, slr!

- Glad you guys could make it. - What�s golng on?

Freakln� loony tune�s got hlmself wlred to some dynamlte.

Wants to talk to the presldent or hls ex-wlfe.

- Ex-wlfe? - Yeah.

Every tlme we get close he says love is dead in the world.

L�m ready, captaln.

Shut up, dllls!

All rlght, people! Let�s get ready!

Into posltlons, men! That�s rlght.

Where�s burt?

Excuse me.

- Oh, no! - What the hell?

Hey, slmpson!

Slmpson! Thls is my...

slmpson! Slmpson! Thls is my bust, slmpson!

Slmpson! You ilsten to me!

Slmpson!

Hi.

My name�s burt.

Love is dead in the world.

I know what you mean.

You do?

Yeah.

Llke...

ilke it just got... lost or somethlng.

Llke it just froze along the way.

I, uh...

i heard about your wlfe.

Yolanda?

Yolanda.

I know... how much paln you must be in.

So you�re gonna blow yourself up?

Because you thlnk she doesn�t love you any more?

I thlnk... maybe she stlll loves you.

You do?

Yes, i do.

When, um... when was the last tlme you told her you love her?

A long tlme ago, huh?

Just slowly stopped talklng to each other.

And you can�t even remember why you fell in love in the flrst place, rlght?

Well, obvlously, you can remember that now or you wouldn�t be dolng thls.

Oh...

...go ahead and blow yourself up if you want.

You�re sure gonna be mlsslng a lot.

Do you have any klds?

Mlckey and mlkey.

How old are they?

31/4 and 5.

If you�re gone, who�s gonna see they graduate hlgh school?

How you gonna flnd out whether they found a nlce glrl?

Huh?

- Whether mlkey�s stutter cleared up? - Mlkey doesn�t stutter!

No, but let�s just say that he dld.

There�s so much... there�s so many...

...so many ilttle thlngs that we don�t even notlce untll they�re gone.

Can mlckey rlde a blke?

Don�t you wanna teach hlm? Or see hlm get hls braces?

- Or touch the top of that door jamb? - How dld you know about the door jamb?

Pal, come on!

You may thlnk you know hlm, but...

...i bet you don�t even know who hls teacher is.

Or the names of the monsters in hls room.

Or why he burled hls shoes that tlme...

...or why he made you call hlm peter for a whole month.

You know, you just take thlngs ilke that for granted.

Then one day there�s a stranger standlng in the door, saylng:

Can i borrow the car keys, dad?

You don�t know how it got that way.

You don�t even know what you�re dolng there.

God!

Lt�s gone then.

Once it�s gone, you can�t get it back...

...no matter how hard you try.

No one should klll hlmself.

Don�t you do that.

Oh, l�ve been so stupld!

(applause)

(cheering)

- Thank you. - Ok, pal.

All rlght, come wlth us.

Hell of a job, burt! Completely insane, man, but a hell of a job!

Flrst rate!

- Here, we can get a shot. - All rlght, folks...

there�s one thlng, burt. Where�s the bomb?

- The bomb? - Yeah.

And in recognltlon of an act of outstandlng herolsm...

...the seattle pollce department awards you the sllver cross.

(applause)

- Burt, you dldn�t even make a speech! - L�m in a hurry.

Why? Where are you golng?

- Haven�t got tlme, ernle. - Where are you golng!

- You�re not golng anywhere, slmpson. - Jesus, mlller, not now!

- Who do you thlnk you are? - He�s my partner, shlt-for-bralns!

L�m sorry i took your bust.

If i could, l�d put it on your record. It doesn�t matter to me.

- That�s not good enough. - It has to be, cos l�m in a blg hurry.

I don�t glve a shlt. We�re havlng it out rlght now.

Mlller, look, l�m not gonna swlng at ya.

Because you�re a wuss, slmpson. Just ilke i always thought you were.

Yeah, well, maybe you�re rlght.

On the other hand...

...you could be wrong.

I love you, burt slmpson.

(car horn)

Dougle!

Dougle!

Hey, boy!

- How ya dolng? - L�m ok. L�m flne.

- Who were ya talklng to? Glmme a hug. - Just my buddles.

I gotcha, rlght where i want ya!

- Dad, i can�t breathe! - I gotcha now!

- (car horn) - You glve up?

Uncle! Uncle!

(car horns)

- Are you really sure? - Never been so sure in my ilfe!

Jesus!

- You�re all set, mr slmpson. - Ok, great! Thank you very much.

You all set, mr slmpson?

- You bet! - All rlght!

(~ ��roll with lt�� by steve winwood on car radio)

You ilke it?

Hey!

I love it!

Dad, walt a mlnute! Thls is a really good song!

- Thls? You ilke thls? - Yeah!

(sings along) ~ you can make it... roll wlth it, baby

~ when thls world turns its back on you

~ hang in, and you just re-thlnk it through

~ you just roll wlth it, baby

~ hey, you just roll wlth it, baby

~ come on and just roll wlth it, baby

~ hang on and just roll wlth it, baby!

How�d you know about thls place?

We came here wlth mlss graham. We�re dolng a project on the ralnforest.

- Are ya? - Yeah.

- Wow! Look at thls guy! - My god!

- I ilke hlm. He�s a blrd-eatlng splder. - Blrd-eatlng?

- Except he doesn�t really eat blrds. - No?

He eats mlce and bugs. But he can klll blrds if he has to.

You know, if they get too close to hls hole where he ilves.

Because it�s so hot, they ilve in holes.

It�s cooler underground, and safer whlle they�re sleeplng.

- You know a lot about bugs, huh? - Yeah.

I dldn�t know that.

But baseball�s stlll my favourlte. Then dlnosaurs, and then bugs.

Hey, dad, you gotta see thls!

Isn�t he cool?

Oh, yeah!

Wow!

Scary! Huh?

Yeah.

Blrd-eatlng splder.

They ilve in holes.

Rlght?

Dad? Can we do it agaln next week?

- We�ll see. - Ok.

Remember when we flrst moved in, burt? How we planned thls porch would be?

Whlte-washed decks and...

...that old summer chalr that ernle�s slster gave us hanglng over there.

- Whatever happened to that chalr? - It�s stlll in the garage, i thlnk.

Oh, burt, i feel so lucky!

I really thought it was all over for us.

L�d even glven up hoplng.

But...

...somehow you made it all happen for us agaln, burt.

No, i dldn�t, honey.

Yes... you dld.

And suddenly i feel ilke... we have a future agaln.

Oh... i love you, burt slmpson.

I love you, too.

Burt?

Oh, burt...

the guy says to hlm, ��well, what are tornadoes for? ��

and the prlest says:

��well, they�re god�s answer to traller parks! ��

what!

Never mlnd!

- I guess you heard about tucker? - No.

Got blown away thls afternoon.

He pulls thls guy over for maklng an illegal rlght...

...and blam! He takes two rounds in the chest!

- They id the guy? - Yeah. Carl stark.

Boss of those guys you put in hospltal. Man, that guy is an evil son of a bltch.

Stark.

Shlt, l�m gettlng hungry. Wanna get somethlng to eat?

What?

- When dld i last buy you dlnner? - A couple of weeks ago?

No, you got the plzzas on monday.

Exactly!

(~ chopin nocturne)

Are you outta your mlnd?

- That jacket is you, pal! - Thanks.

I just wanna buy you a ilttle dlnner.

Dlnner�s a plzza, burt, or a cheeseburger. Not lobster thermldor.

Ernle, you were best man at my weddlng. You�re godfather to my son.

We�ve been partners for ten years.

Can�t i just once spend more than three lousy dollars buylng you dlnner?

Nothlng�s worth nlnety bucks a plate!

- you are, pal. - More wlne, slr?

Yeah. Let me have a bottle of your best champagne.

Burt!

Ernle, i have just found out somethlng that�s so important...

...i can�t belleve it took me thls long to flnd out.

You can�t spend your whole ilfe plannlng what�ll make you happy tomorrow...

...or you�ll never be happy today. You gotta do it now.

And that includes your hot tubs.

I was wrong about lewls. It�s a good deal. Great idea!

Thank you.

You gotta go for it, ernle. You gotta enjoy it.

Oh, i almost forgot. These are for you.

What are these?

- The keys to my mustang. - You bought a mustang?

Llttle red convertlble. I want you to have it.

That�s it, buddy. You�re seelng a doctor. You�re outta your fuckln� mlnd!

(whispers) slt down, slt down, slt down!

Ernle, have you ever drlven a convertlble?

Do you know how it feels when the top�s down?

The sun�s out, the wlnd�s golng through your halr?

Do you know how alive it makes you feel?

I want you to have that feellng.

I want you to feel allve.

There�s another thlng. Come here.

I love ya, pal.

Oh, god!

So, flnally, he takes me out for a $400 meal...

...klsses me, and glves me these. The keys to hls new convertlble.

What the hell�s wrong wlth hlm?

- And today is hls last day on the force? - Mm-hm.

I really don�t thlnk you need to worry very much.

He sald he loved me!

Many offlcers on the polnt of retlrement experlence contradlctory feellngs.

Some relate to immlnent loss of power.

Others to a fear of maklng it alone outslde the close camaraderle of the force.

No, you don�t understand. Burt�s not ilke thls. Not at all.

Thls is ilke drlvlng around wlth a completely dlfferent guy.

I suppose it�s posslble he�s sufferlng from some form of manlc depresslon.

Well, how can we flnd out?

Lt�s actually a chemlcal imbalance. It would show up on a blood test.

- Good mornlng. - Good mornlng.

- Mornlng. - Mornlng.

- How about a ilttle break? - Gee, thanks a lot!

Yeah...

oh!

Hello, boys!

- Jesus, it�s hlm! - Get the hell outta here.

Aw! Now does that mean you�re not gonna tell me where stark is?

Well... look, l�ll tell you what.

L�m gonna leave you my number... rlght here.

If you change your mlnd, you just glve me a...

...a call. Can you read that?

You can�t see from there, can you? Oh, walt a mlnute.

Argh!

Is that better?

- Jesus! - Huh?

- You�d ilke to read it, too? - Ow!

Guard!

- Can you read thls? - Yeah. I can read that.

- Excellent! - Ow!

- Go ahead. - What?

- What�s my number? - Screw you!

You weren�t really serlous about calllng me, were you?

L�ll tell you where stark is!

Good boy.

- Can you tell me where dr drexler is? - Drexler?

- Yes. It�s very important. - One moment.

Dr drexler�s on the second floor. Room 207.

207. thanks.

Out of the questlon! All records are strlctly confldentlal.

- I have to see them. - Not wlthout authorlsatlon.

- You don�t understand. L�m a cop. - So? Show me a warrant.

Screw thls!

- Put those back! Thls is outrageous! - He�s my partner!

Well, your partner is dylng!

- What? - I sald... he�s dylng.

Autotoxla... haema...

...tosa. Wexler�s curtaln. That�s why i dldn�t report the marljuana trace.

- Marljuana? - That�s what i sald.

You must have notlced somethlng wrong when he began to go bllnd.

Biind?

(crash!)

- Where the hell is slmpson, dllls? - I don�t know, slr.

Two guys in tractlon clalm he beat on �em tlll they told hlm where stark was.

- Could�ve blown the whole thlng. - Shlt!

Hey, ed. The captaln wants to see you.

Go on! Get golng!

Where the hell is my partner!

Ow!

25... 6...

- used twentles. - It�s great.

We gotta do thls more often.

I deducted for the damages on the doors.

No!

- Pollce! Freeze! - It�s the heat!

Let�s get outta here!

- Vlto! Let�s go! - He wrecked the llncoln!

Pollce! Freeze!

Shlt!

Come on!

(panting) llke i sald...

pollce!

Freeze!

Go ahead.

Make my day.

What do you thlnk i am? Stupld?

(elevator bell)

Thls is rldlculous.

Stark!

Thank god! I thought l�d lost ya.

You are one crazy son of a bltch!

I ilke that!

- But you�ll stlll blow me away, won�t ya? - L�ll klll ya.

Walt up!

Walt a mlnute! You dldn�t get me!

Shlt!

What klnd of a cop klller are you!

Can you belleve thls guy!

Yes!

Come back!

Oh, no!

(explosion)

You mlssed me agaln, you idlot!

Ohh!

Where the hell are you?

Thls is really plsslng me off!

Hey, stupld!

Hey, watch out, man!

L�m gonna say thls once, so ilsten up. Elther you come up here and klll me...

...or l�m gonna cllmb down there and pull us both off. You got it?

Ok, pal! That�s it!

Aaagh!

Aw!

Now you�ve really plssed me off!

Good. Plssed off is good.

- Burt! - Ernle?!

Burt! Burt! Llsten carefully!

You�re not slck!

What?!

- He sald you�re not slck. - Shut up!

What?!

Dr drexler made a mlstake! You�re not gonna dle!

L�m not gonna dle?!

L�m not gonna dle!

I am gonna dle. I am gonna dle!

Damn rlght, sucker!

Ernle! Do somethlng! Ow!

Do somethlng! Come on!

- Shoot the son of a bltch! - Sayonara, sucker!

Help me!

You gotta be klddlng!

Hang on, burt!

(stark screams)

Burt! You ok?

L�m not gonna dle!

Don�t look down!

Just don�t look down.

Just don�t look down.

Don�t worry! Hang on, buddy! Backup�s on the way!

Don�t... look down!

Aagghh!

Dearly beloved, we who gather here...

...come from many dlfferent stages in our journey through ilfe...

...wlth dlfferent ways of looklng at ilfe and death.

We gather here to mourn a man. A frlend to those who knew and loved hlm.

A man who served thls clty well.

A man who wore hls unlform wlth prlde.

- Couldn�t he hurry it up a ilttle? - Hey... show a ilttle respect.

(priest) at some polnt our ilves were touched by hlm whom we mourn here.

And our ilves...

...touched hlm.

Hls sudden departure from among us has cut across all our ilves.

Dad?

Who was thls guy?

He drove buses.

And also... gave me back my ilfe.

(priest) a tlme for every matter under heaven.

- Carolyn. - Captaln.

- Well... you made it. - Just about, anyway.

- i was hanglng out the chopper. - Shut up, dllls!

The preclnct won�t be the same wlthout you.

- Well... - oh, i almost forgot.

The hellcopter pllot sent that over. Thought you mlght ilke to see it.

- Not my best angle! - Look, your fly�s open!

Here, you can keep thls. L�ll slgn it for you later.

Thanks, captaln, for comlng out here. I appreclate it.

Thanks a lot, slr.

- Here we go, honey. - Ready?

- You got the keys, ernle? - Damn rlght i got the keys. It�s my car!

- What? - He gave it to me.

- You gave it to hlm? - When i thought i was dylng.

(ernie) well, that�s not my fault, pal.

- So, can i borrow the car? - Ok, but it�s ten cents a mlle.

- Flgures. - Great! Back seat and it�s my car!

- Keys! Keys! - You ok, honey?

Ow! Plece of cake.

So, where do you wanna go?

(sirens)

- Burt! - Burt!

Daddy!

(sirens continue)

So, where do you wanna go?

(dougie) i wanna go to the park.

- (ernie) i wanna go to a bar. - (carolyn) l�d klnda ilke to go home.

~ when life is too much

~ roll with it, baby

~ don�t stop and lose your touch

~ oh, no, baby

~ hard times knocking on your door

~ l�ll tell them you ain�t there no more

~ get on through it

~ roll with it, baby

~ luck�ll come and then slip away

~ you�ve gotta move, bring it back to stay

~ you�ve gotta roll with it, baby

~ come on and just roll with it, baby

~ you and me, roll with it, baby

~ hang on and just roll with it, baby

~ hey!

~ the way that you love

~ is good as money

~ i swear by stars above

~ sweet as honey

~ people think you�re down and out

~ you show them what it�s all about

~ you can make it

~ roll with it, baby

~ when this world turns its back on you

~ hang in and do that sweet thing you do

~ you just roll with it, baby

~ yeah, you just roll with it, baby

~ come on and just roll with it, baby

~ you and me, just roll with it, baby

~ roll with it, baby

~ yeah, you just roll with it, baby

~ you and me, just roll with it, baby

~ hang on and just roll with it, baby

~ hey! Come on!

~ roll with me, baby

~ hang on, baby

~ roll with me, baby

~ roll

~ hey!

~ come on and roll

subtltles by vlslontext