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1
00:00:01,901 --> 00:00:06,270
Oh! What a day! Huh, Mark?
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00:00:06,373 --> 00:00:09,536
Mark. Mark!
3
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Mark, what are you listening to?
4
00:00:15,849 --> 00:00:17,783
"Pus and Boots"?
5
00:00:18,585 --> 00:00:21,349
With their new hit single,
Smell the Hell.
6
00:00:22,655 --> 00:00:25,180
You gotta be kidding. Nice lyrics.
7
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"I hate you. You're garbage.
8
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I'm puking. You're garbage."
9
00:00:31,531 --> 00:00:34,694
Which reminds me,
you forgot to take out the garbage.
10
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- Hey, everybody.
- Hi.
11
00:00:38,238 --> 00:00:40,138
Hi, guys.
12
00:00:40,206 --> 00:00:44,370
Look at this. Brad got a letter
from the University of North Carolina.
13
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Here's an uplifting tune:
I Feel the Fungus.
14
00:00:50,350 --> 00:00:52,375
It's from North Carolina.
15
00:00:55,455 --> 00:00:58,424
This is that scout
that was at practice the other day.
16
00:00:58,525 --> 00:01:01,016
He says he's looking at me
for a soccer scholarship.
17
00:01:01,094 --> 00:01:04,552
University of North Carolina?
That's not in Michigan.
18
00:01:07,867 --> 00:01:10,700
I have a chance at playing
for the Tar Heels. Awesome!
19
00:01:10,770 --> 00:01:12,704
- Awesome. All right!
- Yeah.
20
00:01:12,772 --> 00:01:17,300
This is great! Now remember though,
you have two more years of school.
21
00:01:17,377 --> 00:01:19,140
Keep that grade-point average up.
22
00:01:19,245 --> 00:01:23,113
That's right. It's like when those
technical schools were romancing me,
23
00:01:23,183 --> 00:01:25,276
I didn't want to let my grades go down.
24
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They couldn't go down.
25
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I'm gonna work harder than ever.
I've got something to shoot for.
26
00:01:34,994 --> 00:01:37,554
- Congratulations.
- I'm gonna call Jason.
27
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A scholarship.
Do you know what that would mean?
28
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He's gonna get a great education.
29
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Oh, yeah!
30
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But with the money we'd save,
I could start another hot rod.
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00:01:49,909 --> 00:01:52,742
Tim, if Brad is lucky enough
to get a scholarship,
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we're not gonna be buying any cars.
We have two more kids times four more
33
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years of college. You do the math.
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I married you so I wouldn't
have to do the math.
35
00:02:02,000 --> 00:02:08,074
-= www.SubtitleDB.org =-
36
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Hello?
It's Cathy and Greg.
37
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Oh, no. No.
38
00:03:01,748 --> 00:03:03,909
Hi.
39
00:03:03,983 --> 00:03:07,441
Uh... oh, you want to
get together next Friday?
40
00:03:07,520 --> 00:03:10,887
- No, no, no.
- No, we can't. We're busy.
41
00:03:11,824 --> 00:03:13,314
What are we busy doing?
42
00:03:13,960 --> 00:03:16,394
We're, uh, sawing wood.
43
00:03:18,798 --> 00:03:20,527
Dinner, Randy. Dinner.
44
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We're sawing wood for dinner.
45
00:03:22,669 --> 00:03:26,969
You see, we make a table,
then we eat off it. Yeah.
46
00:03:27,040 --> 00:03:29,270
No, no, no. We'll let you know
when we're free.
47
00:03:29,342 --> 00:03:31,708
OK. Bye-bye.
48
00:03:31,778 --> 00:03:34,042
- That was close.
- Yeah.
49
00:03:34,113 --> 00:03:36,673
Why are you trying
to avoid these people?
50
00:03:36,783 --> 00:03:39,946
Cathy Simms and Greg Clark,
the most annoying kids at school.
51
00:03:40,019 --> 00:03:43,250
They're like a married couple.
Since they heard we were together,
52
00:03:43,323 --> 00:03:45,291
they've been bugging us to double-date.
53
00:03:45,391 --> 00:03:46,881
I think they smell our fear.
54
00:03:50,296 --> 00:03:53,026
Randy, it's not
really nice to duck people.
55
00:03:53,099 --> 00:03:57,195
Oh, well, you would know, being one
of the all-time great couple-duckers.
56
00:03:58,204 --> 00:04:01,571
- Me? I am not a couple-ducker.
- Oh, come on, Mom!
57
00:04:01,674 --> 00:04:04,404
The Goodmans? For a month
we couldn't turn on our lights
58
00:04:04,477 --> 00:04:07,412
so they wouldn't know
we were back from vacation.
59
00:04:07,480 --> 00:04:09,846
We don't know what to do.
We're desperate.
60
00:04:09,949 --> 00:04:12,417
Now, I don't really condone this.
61
00:04:12,485 --> 00:04:15,613
But if you have to avoid somebody,
here's what you do.
62
00:04:15,688 --> 00:04:20,648
Whenever they want to get together,
be agreeable but vague.
63
00:04:20,727 --> 00:04:25,096
Use phrases like, uh, "after the
holidays" or "when things settle down."
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00:04:25,164 --> 00:04:27,132
Oh, if you run into them unexpectedly,
65
00:04:27,200 --> 00:04:30,067
be sure that you have some emergency
you have to deal with.
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00:04:30,136 --> 00:04:32,969
This family, you don't even
have to make that up.
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00:04:34,207 --> 00:04:35,731
- Thanks.
- Welcome.
68
00:04:35,808 --> 00:04:37,708
- You ready to go to the mall?
- Sure.
69
00:04:37,777 --> 00:04:41,713
- Oh, when are you guys gonna be back?
- Oh, you know, when things settle down.
70
00:04:47,020 --> 00:04:50,456
Honey, you should've seen Brad
at soccer practice. He was incredible!
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00:04:50,523 --> 00:04:52,457
- I was the bomb!
- No, you were the man!
72
00:04:52,525 --> 00:04:55,289
- I'm the man! Ooh!
- Hey! Ow!
73
00:04:56,896 --> 00:04:59,126
Chest bumping.
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00:04:59,198 --> 00:05:01,894
Something you'd never see two women do.
75
00:05:03,903 --> 00:05:06,269
I'd pay a lot of money
to see it though.
76
00:05:09,509 --> 00:05:11,841
Yeah. Coach Martino
seemed pretty excited
77
00:05:11,911 --> 00:05:14,402
- about that letter.
- We're all excited about it.
78
00:05:14,480 --> 00:05:17,040
But remember what he said.
They send out 300 letters,
79
00:05:17,116 --> 00:05:19,209
but only five kids get the scholarships.
80
00:05:19,285 --> 00:05:21,947
How do I make sure
I'm one of those five?
81
00:05:22,021 --> 00:05:25,115
Come on. You gotta
work harder than the other 295.
82
00:05:25,191 --> 00:05:29,855
- Pay attention to your trainer.
- I don't have a personal trainer.
83
00:05:29,929 --> 00:05:32,295
You do now. Drop and give me 20.
84
00:05:34,334 --> 00:05:36,768
Blow it out!
Seventeen! Come on! Eighteen!
85
00:05:36,836 --> 00:05:40,294
Push it! Nineteen!
Good! Twenty. Lock it up.
86
00:05:40,373 --> 00:05:42,534
Put another plate on.
One more set! Come on!
87
00:05:42,608 --> 00:05:46,135
- Dad, another set? I'm kind of tired.
- Tired? Look, we've got a goal.
88
00:05:46,212 --> 00:05:48,737
We've gotta do everything we can.
What do we want?
89
00:05:48,815 --> 00:05:51,283
- Scholarship.
- How are we gonna get it?
90
00:05:51,351 --> 00:05:53,046
- Hard work.
- I can't hear you!
91
00:05:53,119 --> 00:05:54,381
- Hard work!
- Can't hear!
92
00:05:54,454 --> 00:05:56,115
- Hard work!
- I can't hear you!
93
00:05:56,189 --> 00:05:57,884
I heard you!
94
00:06:00,560 --> 00:06:02,790
Does everybody know what time it is?
95
00:06:02,862 --> 00:06:05,797
- Tool Time!
- That's right!
96
00:06:05,865 --> 00:06:11,735
Binford Tools is proud to present
Tim "The Tool Man" Taylor! Whoo!
97
00:06:17,877 --> 00:06:19,606
Thank you.
98
00:06:19,679 --> 00:06:22,648
Thank you, everybody.
Thanks for coming. Thank you, Heidi.
99
00:06:22,749 --> 00:06:25,616
Thank you, Heidi. Thank you, Heidi!
100
00:06:30,456 --> 00:06:34,415
Welcome to Tool Time.
I am Tim "The Tool Man" Taylor.
101
00:06:34,494 --> 00:06:37,019
And of course you all
know my assistant, Al Borland.
102
00:06:40,900 --> 00:06:44,336
Well, today Al and I join you
for our Tool Time salute...
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Oi! My back!
104
00:06:45,872 --> 00:06:46,896
...to fitness.
105
00:06:48,775 --> 00:06:52,541
And who better to help us out than
those lean, mean construction machines
106
00:06:52,645 --> 00:06:55,614
from Bay City? The boys from
K&B Construction! Bring 'em out!
107
00:06:55,681 --> 00:06:58,115
Let's hear it
for Rock, Pete and Dwayne!
108
00:06:58,184 --> 00:07:00,448
Hey! Hey, buddy!
109
00:07:00,520 --> 00:07:02,545
- All right!
- How are you, buddy?
110
00:07:02,622 --> 00:07:04,351
All right.
111
00:07:05,358 --> 00:07:08,088
- It's good to see you.
- Always great to be here, Timmy.
112
00:07:08,161 --> 00:07:10,652
All right.
What do you guys do to stay in shape?
113
00:07:10,730 --> 00:07:15,292
Well, not as much
as you might think, Tim.
114
00:07:15,401 --> 00:07:19,565
Pete's idea of a workout
is the old one-armed doughnut curl.
115
00:07:21,340 --> 00:07:23,808
Is, um, fitness a big deal
at K&B Construction?
116
00:07:23,876 --> 00:07:28,245
Ah, it's job one, Timmy.
According to researchers at K&B R and D,
117
00:07:28,314 --> 00:07:31,943
being in shape can help
prevent injuries at the workplace.
118
00:07:32,018 --> 00:07:35,647
The only way I can prevent injuries in
our workplace is if Tim calls in sick.
119
00:07:35,721 --> 00:07:38,884
That's a good one, Al!
120
00:07:39,759 --> 00:07:44,787
You know, Tim, studies have shown that
hammering or any repetitive movement
121
00:07:44,864 --> 00:07:48,630
with the hand can
cause carpal tunnel syndrome.
122
00:07:48,734 --> 00:07:52,500
To prevent this, my exercise program
goes something like this.
123
00:07:58,277 --> 00:08:03,772
Be sure to consult a physician before
starting a strenuous exercise program.
124
00:08:04,450 --> 00:08:07,578
Rock, what do you do to stay in shape?
125
00:08:07,653 --> 00:08:10,520
Well, during lunch breaks,
I teach Jazzercise.
126
00:08:15,761 --> 00:08:18,696
That doesn't sound too manly, Rock.
127
00:08:18,764 --> 00:08:22,530
We do it 80 stories up
on a steel girder.
128
00:08:22,635 --> 00:08:25,001
Well, that'll put wind
in your leotard.
129
00:08:26,005 --> 00:08:28,906
Speaking of leotards,
it's time to introduce our guest,
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00:08:28,975 --> 00:08:31,000
a professional bodybuilder.
131
00:08:31,077 --> 00:08:33,841
Not just a professional,
a three-time world champion.
132
00:08:33,946 --> 00:08:35,880
Here at Cobo Hall at the fitness show.
133
00:08:35,948 --> 00:08:39,008
Heidi, my bodybuilder, please.
Miss Cory Everson!
134
00:08:44,590 --> 00:08:46,683
Ah, it's very good
to have you on the show.
135
00:08:46,759 --> 00:08:48,727
- Thank you.
- Cory's here to show us how
136
00:08:48,794 --> 00:08:51,957
- to prevent injuries at work.
- Yes. One of the leading injuries
137
00:08:52,031 --> 00:08:54,090
in the workplace
is injury to the low back,
138
00:08:54,166 --> 00:08:57,465
because you're using improper
mechanics. Proper body mechanics.
139
00:08:57,537 --> 00:09:02,099
Use your legs to lift, not your back.
And never rotate and torque your spine.
140
00:09:02,174 --> 00:09:04,404
That's what happened.
141
00:09:05,478 --> 00:09:07,639
There's some men
that probably don't think
142
00:09:07,747 --> 00:09:11,046
women can lift the iron with the men,
you know? I'm not one of them.
143
00:09:11,117 --> 00:09:14,780
But just for the sake of argument,
do you want to go mano to womano?
144
00:09:14,854 --> 00:09:17,220
You want to compete against me?
145
00:09:17,323 --> 00:09:21,419
- Yeah.
- You do know I'm a professional?
146
00:09:21,494 --> 00:09:25,362
I could've gone pro. I wanted to keep
my eligibility open for the Olympics.
147
00:09:26,933 --> 00:09:30,699
What event was that? Synchronized
Gluing a Board to Your Head?
148
00:09:30,803 --> 00:09:34,261
I remember that! Yeah!
149
00:09:36,342 --> 00:09:39,903
Do you guys wonder why it's been three
years since I've had you on the show?
150
00:09:40,880 --> 00:09:43,246
- Let's get to it.
- Tim, she looks pretty strong.
151
00:09:43,316 --> 00:09:45,546
I think she could bench press us.
152
00:09:46,085 --> 00:09:48,144
And, by the way, anytime.
153
00:09:48,955 --> 00:09:52,118
OK, let's try a nice light weight.
Let's say 130 pounds.
154
00:09:52,224 --> 00:09:55,751
- OK, looks good to me.
- Use your legs.
155
00:09:55,828 --> 00:09:57,796
Come on, Timbo.
156
00:09:57,863 --> 00:10:00,923
Oh!
157
00:10:02,268 --> 00:10:05,101
- Yeah!
- All right, Timmy!
158
00:10:09,976 --> 00:10:11,876
Your turn, Cory.
159
00:10:29,762 --> 00:10:32,629
- What was that?
- What was what?
160
00:10:39,805 --> 00:10:42,103
Maybe you're not as strong
as you thought.
161
00:10:42,174 --> 00:10:45,143
Just hold on a second.
I just need a better grip.
162
00:10:53,386 --> 00:10:56,753
Maybe you need the help
of a big strong man?
163
00:11:09,969 --> 00:11:13,496
Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go!
Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Yeah!
164
00:11:13,572 --> 00:11:17,531
You shaved two seconds off your last
try. Now some ball-handling. All right?
165
00:11:17,643 --> 00:11:20,271
Use your eyes.
Use your eyes. Come on.
166
00:11:20,346 --> 00:11:23,611
- Yeah, yeah!
- Brad, it's Friday night.
167
00:11:23,683 --> 00:11:25,617
Wouldrt you rather be out having fun?
168
00:11:25,685 --> 00:11:29,177
No, Mom. Can't have fun.
Dad says I need work on my ball control.
169
00:11:29,255 --> 00:11:31,621
I'm gonna keep doing it
so I can score more goals.
170
00:11:31,691 --> 00:11:34,558
This kid's gonna
be a superstar, right, honey?
171
00:11:34,627 --> 00:11:37,118
- I guess so.
- I can't hear you!
172
00:11:38,230 --> 00:11:40,698
Tim, come inside.
I want to talk to you for a minute.
173
00:11:40,766 --> 00:11:43,291
- Don't slow down. I'll be right back.
- All right.
174
00:11:45,337 --> 00:11:47,828
Don't you think you're
being a little hard on him?
175
00:11:47,907 --> 00:11:50,467
He loves this stuff.
Keep your knees up!
176
00:11:50,576 --> 00:11:53,443
Soccer has been fun.
I don't want you working him to death
177
00:11:53,512 --> 00:11:55,139
and turning it into a chore.
178
00:11:55,214 --> 00:11:58,115
This is the difference
between you and me.
179
00:11:58,184 --> 00:12:01,847
You look at the glass, you say it's half
empty. I look at the glass and I say...
180
00:12:05,958 --> 00:12:07,585
...it's broken.
181
00:12:10,663 --> 00:12:12,028
Hi, sweetie.
182
00:12:12,098 --> 00:12:14,862
Mom, can you open this can?
My nails are still wet.
183
00:12:18,037 --> 00:12:20,528
Why did you paint your nails black?
184
00:12:20,606 --> 00:12:22,733
Why did you paint yours pink?
185
00:12:24,510 --> 00:12:27,070
Oh, OK. OK.
186
00:12:27,179 --> 00:12:30,342
I get it. I get it.
You're trying to express yourself.
187
00:12:30,449 --> 00:12:33,612
It's just part of growing up.
I think it's really cool.
188
00:12:33,686 --> 00:12:36,780
Yeah, in fact, you know what?
I think they look great.
189
00:12:41,026 --> 00:12:42,994
God help me!
190
00:12:46,365 --> 00:12:48,697
- Hi, guys. How's it going?
- Hey, Mrs. Taylor.
191
00:12:48,768 --> 00:12:53,102
Hey. Terrible. The couple we've been
avoiding cornered us after school.
192
00:12:53,172 --> 00:12:55,936
Yeah. We got a double-date
with Cathy and Greg tonight.
193
00:12:56,041 --> 00:12:58,100
What happened to the excuses I gave you?
194
00:12:58,177 --> 00:13:02,841
Shot down one by one. I should've
asked Dad how he ducks people.
195
00:13:02,915 --> 00:13:06,407
He doesn't have to worry about it.
He's the one people are ducking.
196
00:13:07,987 --> 00:13:10,353
Sorry I'm late.
Got hung up at work.
197
00:13:10,422 --> 00:13:12,549
We can catch
the second half of the game.
198
00:13:12,625 --> 00:13:15,321
- OK, I'm ready.
- Look what I had made.
199
00:13:15,394 --> 00:13:18,727
- "Goal Brad Goal."
- Hey.
200
00:13:18,798 --> 00:13:20,959
If your kid's a winner,
you gotta flaunt it.
201
00:13:21,066 --> 00:13:22,931
Right.
202
00:13:23,836 --> 00:13:27,169
- What are you doing home?
- Coach kicked me off the team.
203
00:13:31,644 --> 00:13:33,874
Why did the coach
kick you off the team?
204
00:13:33,946 --> 00:13:36,710
- I told him off when he benched me.
- Why did he bench you?
205
00:13:36,782 --> 00:13:39,945
More importantly,
who are you to tell your coach off?
206
00:13:40,052 --> 00:13:42,680
Mom, we were up
six to nothing thanks to me.
207
00:13:42,755 --> 00:13:46,020
Then our coach gets this idea
he should put in the crappy players.
208
00:13:46,091 --> 00:13:50,323
- The crappy players?
- I'm just trying to build up my stats.
209
00:13:50,396 --> 00:13:52,523
I had three goals
and it wasrt half-time.
210
00:13:52,598 --> 00:13:57,433
I don't care if you had three...
Three goals at half-time?
211
00:13:57,503 --> 00:14:00,734
I don't care if you had 600 goals.
The coach runs the team, Brad.
212
00:14:00,806 --> 00:14:03,240
The coach wouldn't
have a team without me.
213
00:14:03,309 --> 00:14:07,177
Me, me, me, me, me! When did you
become the center of your own universe?
214
00:14:07,246 --> 00:14:09,544
Why don't you ask your shirt?
215
00:14:13,452 --> 00:14:15,283
Shirts don't talk.
216
00:14:16,522 --> 00:14:20,652
Dad, we've worked so hard for this.
You gotta talk some sense into my coach.
217
00:14:20,726 --> 00:14:22,591
No way your father's going in to talk.
218
00:14:22,661 --> 00:14:24,526
- I'll talk to his coach.
- Thank you.
219
00:14:24,597 --> 00:14:27,862
I'll tell him my kid was wrong.
He deserves to be kicked off the team.
220
00:14:28,901 --> 00:14:31,233
- Now you're bailing.
- No. Don't start this.
221
00:14:31,303 --> 00:14:32,600
- I see how it is.
- Hold on.
222
00:14:32,671 --> 00:14:35,799
I thought we were in this together.
You know what? I was wrong.
223
00:14:38,244 --> 00:14:39,541
What is with him?
224
00:14:39,612 --> 00:14:42,581
Where did he get the idea I'd
approve of him disobeying coach?
225
00:14:42,681 --> 00:14:46,777
I don't know. Maybe it had something
to do with "Brad, you're awesome."
226
00:14:46,852 --> 00:14:50,515
"Brad, you're the bomb."
"I can't hear you!"
227
00:14:53,259 --> 00:14:55,819
Oh! You're blaming this on me?
228
00:14:55,895 --> 00:14:58,921
I'm not just blaming you.
I blame every man who thinks sports
229
00:14:58,998 --> 00:15:03,332
are the only thing that matters. I blame
the press for writing about winners.
230
00:15:03,402 --> 00:15:06,428
The networks for making
every game seem like life and death.
231
00:15:06,505 --> 00:15:10,874
I blame the advertisers who only care
about selling beer and $200 sneakers.
232
00:15:12,878 --> 00:15:15,244
You're a rather angry woman, aren't you?
233
00:15:17,583 --> 00:15:22,486
Seventeen, 18, 19...
234
00:15:24,490 --> 00:15:26,754
Easy there, neighbor.
235
00:15:27,960 --> 00:15:32,329
You might end up herniating your nucleus
pulposus and end up with articulopathy.
236
00:15:33,966 --> 00:15:36,526
- What?
- A pain in your butt.
237
00:15:36,635 --> 00:15:39,399
Is your
yoga class over, Wilson?
238
00:15:39,471 --> 00:15:42,406
Yeah. Thought I might continue on
with weight training.
239
00:15:42,474 --> 00:15:45,204
You know, firm and toned.
240
00:15:45,277 --> 00:15:47,404
Why don't you try
covered and hidden? Yah!
241
00:15:47,479 --> 00:15:52,143
So where's Brad?
I thought you were training him.
242
00:15:52,217 --> 00:15:56,586
I was. He got kicked off the soccer team
for mouthing off at the coach.
243
00:15:56,689 --> 00:15:59,590
I wonder if I'm putting
too much pressure on him.
244
00:15:59,658 --> 00:16:02,320
Mm-hm. Mm-hm. Mm-hm. Mm-hm.
245
00:16:02,394 --> 00:16:05,727
You know, Tim, my father and I went
through the same thing together.
246
00:16:05,798 --> 00:16:10,360
- You played soccer?
- No, no, no, no, no, no. Bagpipes.
247
00:16:11,370 --> 00:16:14,464
You know, I was quite a prodigy,
but my father used to pressure me
248
00:16:14,540 --> 00:16:16,804
to practice five hours a day.
249
00:16:16,875 --> 00:16:20,003
And that pressure brought on
one of the darkest days of my life.
250
00:16:20,079 --> 00:16:23,913
Tim, at the Saint Patrick's Day Parade,
I showboated.
251
00:16:23,983 --> 00:16:28,352
Without shame, I drowned out
the entire All-City Leprechaun Choir.
252
00:16:31,857 --> 00:16:34,951
- That reminds me of the time...
- Tim, we're talking about me.
253
00:16:36,095 --> 00:16:37,357
Sorry.
254
00:16:37,429 --> 00:16:41,866
My father realized that his badgering
was partly the cause of my behavior.
255
00:16:41,934 --> 00:16:45,370
- What did he do about it?
- Well, he lightened up.
256
00:16:45,437 --> 00:16:49,396
Said, "Do your best. If you're not the
greatest bagpipe player in the world,
257
00:16:49,508 --> 00:16:53,842
it's OK." Oh, Tim, I felt
so much better. I sat right down.
258
00:16:53,912 --> 00:16:57,075
I wrote a letter of apology
to each and every leprechaun.
259
00:16:58,017 --> 00:17:01,953
Wow. Did you have
to write really, really tiny?
260
00:17:02,021 --> 00:17:04,182
No, Tim. I didn't.
261
00:17:09,161 --> 00:17:12,324
Up against the wall, punk.
And spread 'em!
262
00:17:14,466 --> 00:17:16,195
Very funny, Dad.
263
00:17:16,902 --> 00:17:19,871
Turn that thing off for a minute.
I want to talk to you.
264
00:17:19,938 --> 00:17:22,634
- There's nothing to talk about.
- Yeah, there is.
265
00:17:22,708 --> 00:17:25,472
I want to talk about teamwork.
266
00:17:25,577 --> 00:17:29,741
Um, you know Barry Sanders,
one of the greatest running backs alive.
267
00:17:29,815 --> 00:17:31,908
Not much without his offensive line.
268
00:17:31,984 --> 00:17:35,317
Michael Andretti, great driver.
Not much without his pit crew.
269
00:17:35,387 --> 00:17:38,720
Michael Jordan... Bad example. Um...
270
00:17:40,059 --> 00:17:43,153
I know what you're trying to say.
It's too late. I'm off the team.
271
00:17:43,228 --> 00:17:46,720
Listen for a minute. The reason
I wanted the scholarship so bad for you
272
00:17:46,799 --> 00:17:49,859
is because you have
great athletic ability.
273
00:17:49,935 --> 00:17:52,563
You know, I never played sports
when I was your age.
274
00:17:52,638 --> 00:17:55,129
Yeah, I know.
Grandma says you stunk.
275
00:17:56,475 --> 00:17:59,535
It wasrt because I stunk.
I wasrt interested in sports.
276
00:17:59,611 --> 00:18:02,079
Said you couldn't catch a ball
to save your life.
277
00:18:02,147 --> 00:18:04,206
- It wasrt because...
- Two left feet.
278
00:18:04,283 --> 00:18:06,751
Let me tell you something about Grandma.
279
00:18:06,819 --> 00:18:10,380
Grandma, great! What a role model!
Threw like a girl all the time!
280
00:18:10,456 --> 00:18:13,323
And oh, oh, oh! It was always
passed-down clothes for me!
281
00:18:13,392 --> 00:18:15,917
You try playing football
in tap shoes! Try that!
282
00:18:15,994 --> 00:18:17,757
Dad! Dad!
283
00:18:17,863 --> 00:18:19,763
- Let's forget about Grandma!
- Yeah.
284
00:18:19,832 --> 00:18:22,130
Her cube steak
and stewed tomato dinner...
285
00:18:22,201 --> 00:18:25,864
Going out to football games I
couldn't even think, I had so much gas!
286
00:18:26,939 --> 00:18:28,770
OK. OK.
287
00:18:33,545 --> 00:18:36,912
The reason I wanted you to do this
is because you're good at soccer.
288
00:18:36,982 --> 00:18:38,950
I wanted you
to realize your potential.
289
00:18:39,051 --> 00:18:41,815
- That's what I want.
- But none of that will happen
290
00:18:41,887 --> 00:18:44,856
unless you show good judgment
and respect for other people.
291
00:18:44,957 --> 00:18:48,518
- So I guess I blew it.
- No. We both blew it.
292
00:18:48,594 --> 00:18:52,826
I got too excited about this scholarship
and I put too much pressure on you.
293
00:18:53,999 --> 00:18:56,024
- So what do we do now?
- What do we do now?
294
00:18:56,101 --> 00:19:00,333
- I say we talk to your coach.
- What if he doesn't take me back?
295
00:19:00,405 --> 00:19:04,102
I think he will. You gotta apologize.
I do a little explaining. Huh?
296
00:19:04,176 --> 00:19:08,340
- Thanks, Dad.
- You bet. If it doesn't work out,
297
00:19:08,413 --> 00:19:11,780
I know a guy that can set you up
with a bagpipe scholarship.
298
00:19:16,455 --> 00:19:20,221
It's just really great that you guys
finally found the time to get together
299
00:19:20,325 --> 00:19:23,954
- with Greg and me.
- You're not an easy couple to pin down.
300
00:19:24,029 --> 00:19:28,261
And yet you managed to catch us.
301
00:19:29,535 --> 00:19:31,366
So how's your double-date going?
302
00:19:31,436 --> 00:19:35,372
Remember how I told you Cathy and Greg
were the most annoying people in school?
303
00:19:35,440 --> 00:19:38,068
- Uh-huh.
- They're the most annoying on Earth.
304
00:19:39,111 --> 00:19:43,138
Cathy and I can't wait to go bowling
with you guys. I have a 180 average.
305
00:19:43,215 --> 00:19:46,651
- Oh, Greg. You're so showy.
- I'm not showy.
306
00:19:46,718 --> 00:19:48,447
She always brings this up.
307
00:19:48,520 --> 00:19:49,748
- I do not.
- Please!
308
00:19:49,821 --> 00:19:52,449
Last Thursday night
with Dan and Irene? What was that?
309
00:19:52,524 --> 00:19:54,287
You know what?
Don't start with me.
310
00:19:54,393 --> 00:19:56,691
- You started with me.
- This is a nightmare.
311
00:19:56,762 --> 00:19:59,196
Well, look at the bright side.
312
00:19:59,264 --> 00:20:02,756
The bowling alley closes
in five-and-a-half hours.
313
00:20:02,834 --> 00:20:05,997
- Let's go bowling!
- This is it. We're sunk.
314
00:20:06,939 --> 00:20:09,703
So I'm ready to go bowling.
How about you guys?
315
00:20:09,808 --> 00:20:10,968
You're coming with us?
316
00:20:11,043 --> 00:20:14,945
Oh, I always go on all of Randy's dates.
A boy needs his mother.
317
00:20:17,950 --> 00:20:21,442
- That's right.
- Lauren, you're OK with this?
318
00:20:21,520 --> 00:20:24,887
Yeah, I think it's great.
319
00:20:24,990 --> 00:20:28,756
You know, on really special occasions,
his grandmother comes too.
320
00:20:30,295 --> 00:20:32,786
Just me and my women.
321
00:20:34,032 --> 00:20:36,262
- I realized I can't go bowling.
- You can't?
322
00:20:36,335 --> 00:20:39,270
- I forgot my shoe inserts.
- Oh!
323
00:20:39,338 --> 00:20:41,499
- We should do this another time.
- Yeah.
324
00:20:41,607 --> 00:20:43,370
Sometime after the holidays.
325
00:20:43,475 --> 00:20:45,807
- When things settle down.
- I'll call you.
326
00:20:45,877 --> 00:20:46,844
- OK.
- OK.
327
00:20:46,945 --> 00:20:49,209
- Bye-bye.
- It was nice to meet you.
328
00:20:52,251 --> 00:20:55,812
I don't think you'll have to worry
about ducking Cathy and Greg anymore.
329
00:20:55,921 --> 00:20:59,789
Thank you, Mrs. Taylor. You know,
you are so much cooler than my parents.
330
00:20:59,858 --> 00:21:01,155
- I am?
- Yeah.
331
00:21:01,226 --> 00:21:05,458
They have this thing about lying.
They think it's wrong.
332
00:21:09,468 --> 00:21:12,198
That's why I love my mom.
333
00:21:15,674 --> 00:21:18,165
Three, four!
334
00:21:18,243 --> 00:21:20,575
One, two, three, four!
335
00:21:20,646 --> 00:21:23,206
One, two, three, four!
336
00:21:23,315 --> 00:21:25,749
Hammer, hammer, hammer, hammer!
337
00:21:25,817 --> 00:21:28,285
And a Jack, jack, jack.
Jack, jack, jack.
338
00:21:28,353 --> 00:21:30,913
Saw, saw, saw, saw!
339
00:21:30,989 --> 00:21:33,822
And one, two, three, four!
340
00:21:33,892 --> 00:21:36,360
One, two, three, four!
341
00:21:36,428 --> 00:21:38,862
Rivetdance! Huh!
342
00:21:38,930 --> 00:21:41,899
Lord of the Rivets! Huh!
343
00:21:41,967 --> 00:21:44,595
And one and two and three and four
and five and six and seven, eight!
344
00:21:44,670 --> 00:21:48,606
One and two and three and four
and five and six and seven, huh!
345
00:21:59,418 --> 00:22:00,544
Whoo!
346
00:22:01,305 --> 00:22:07,422
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