Original subtitles

THE PAIN LEAVES

THE PAIN ALWAYS LEAVES

BUT HAVING ENDURED NEVER DOES

- Where is it? - The bridge. Male. 39 years old.

He was on the brink. Bankrupt, getting divorced, and on pills.

From his social media, he's been getting worse for the last three days.

I'll tell you the rest on the way.

- Ismail? - On his way.

Let me know.

What are you doing?

- He won't jump. - Won't you try talking him down?

Did you speak to Aylin?

He's a mess.

He means it.

He wouldn't look down if he was going to jump.

Yes, it's true.

You won't jump if you look down.

You won't jump if you think about what happens after death.

Suicide is a cry for help.

You go there to make peace.

To make peace between life and death, between man and fate,

and between you and the rest of the world.

Their flesh is too much for their bones.

I take their pain away.

I make it more normal.

All people are the same.

I tell them they are not alone.

So that they realize the life they have.

I make them breath the bitter air of death which hurts the back of your throat.

Think about the children who ring the doorbell and then run away.

I'm the same, knocking the death's door

and running away from there with them.

Then the next one, then the next.

Every time they give up.

I have one more reason to live.

- Where is he? - I don't know.

He won't open up to us...

Unless we try to kill ourselves.

That's the kind of man he is.

He's only interested in suicidal people.

He's so strange.

Just when I think I have him figured out, he slips through my fingers.

He seems to always be bleeding.

- What are you doing tonight? - Nothing.

How about dinner?

I don't feel like it.

I thought...

- I thought since today's... - What?

The anniversary of your father's...

Let me know if he calls.

EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT NORWAY'S FJORDS

He jumped.

Fuck you.

Tea, please.

Be honest, you doubted yourself for a second there.

Why would you get up there if you don't really mean it?

He wants attention.

It was freezing. He clogged up the traffic for hours.

I mean... Why would you...

Yeah, you're right. I guess it's what we do.

You should've seen the chief.

He was so impressed by you.

He thinks you have a covert agreement with these non-jumpers.

How's your mom?

We'll see.

She has her doctor's appointment today. My sister's taking her to Rize.

- Say hi for me. - Sure.

Will you stop by the clinic?

There is a match tonight.

I've bet on it.

I've bet on Real...

- Well, good luck. - What?

You think they can't win?

Just saying...

You'll get wiser when you lose...

Ah, come on! It's Real...

CHILD PSYCHIATRY CLINIC

Where is it?

- Come on, Sahir! - I just need a signature.

- Sahir... - Yes, we're both going to burn. Signature.

How many times have I told you? You're supposed to know better.

You went to school for it.

- I skipped most of my classes. - This drug is poison.

- It's not for me. - It will kill you.

It's not that easy to die.

Take it from someone who knows.

- Trust me. - Sahir!

Are you seeing a therapist?

I don't even want to see myself in the mirror, let alone a therapist.

Can!

I saw you through the curtains. Open up!

Don't make it harder.

Open up!

I didn't realize it was you.

- What's going on? - Nothing.

- Do you have some beer? - Of course.

Thanks.

- What's this? - Let go of me.

Yesterday was a hard day.

You attempt suicide twice a year

and you still muck it up. Shame on you!

The maid found me.

I forgot she was coming.

She found me.

What? I forgot!

Either take life or death seriously.

Snacks?

I called Eda over.

She's worried about you.

- Why would she care? - Why do you think?

Stop fucking cutting your wrists.

Take your pills.

Love Eda.

I can't do that.

- I don't want her to suffer if I die. - Then don't die.

Don't die. Try being happy for once.

Don't die!

Are you an idiot?

- I'll go get some snacks. - Great idea.

Where are you going?

He's yours.

Snacks?

Not today. Please not today.

I'm listening.

What's his name?

Savas Kurtulus.

Where?

Beylerbeyi stadium.

Ex-pro soccer player. Savas Kurtulus.

He was a top scorer.

No obvious troubles.

The guard turned on the floodlights.

He's sitting on the field with a gun in his hand.

Still married, happy family.

Financially well-off. No social media.

I found some pictures his friends posted.

Nothing out of the ordinary.

They have been champions for three years in a row.

Played in Italy for half a season.

That's it.

I'll keep looking.

Has a daughter named Ayse.

Please not today.

Don't let them come any closer. He's not playing.

Why here?

- Go away. - Wish I could.

Hey! I said leave!

- I'm already here... - I said go away.

- I might as well try to help. - I said go away.

You've been around for 50 years.

You can wait five more minutes.

"Stop crying, take the foul!"

It was like that, right? Sure...

He rolls over on the pitch just because he lightly kicked.

You go to him.

"Stop crying, take the foul!"

That's what you say, right?

That makes sense.

A foul can turn into an opportunity.

Maybe a corner kick. Maybe a goal.

You never know what might happen.

But crying?

That doesn't do anybody any good.

- You don't know what this is. - Oh, and you do?

Fuck off.

That's the most sincere suggestion I've heard today.

Thank you!

I wish I could leave you to it. But this is what I do, you see?

- I said fuck off. - I will. But let's have some tea first.

Divine.

Tastes so good.

I have this friend, Ismail. From Rize.

His mother is a tea farmer. You wouldn't believe it.

Been lifting heavy her whole life.

This bone right here? She's missing it.

I realized it one day when my hand disappeared into her chest.

It was weird.

Last month, out of nowhere, she had to have her stomach removed.

You're trying to buy time. It won't work. I made up my mind.

Shit! Sahir, I found something.

Sahir, can you hear me?

Sahir!

Sahir!

Stop removing your radio.

- Talk into this. I'll leave it here. - Shut it off.

It's a good idea to leave something behind.

My father is dead.

I wish I had a voice recording of my father's.

Let it record. Maybe someone would like to listen someday.

I'm not mad. Stop trying to trick me.

I want to die, I will die, and this is where I will do it.

I'm intruding, right?

The star player shoots himself dead

in the middle of the field.

They come here...

A huge field.

A lone man lying in the middle of it.

What an image.

But it doesn't work if I'm here to witness it.

I have great respect for the people who commit suicide.

But I'll give you a secret.

Since you care about how this all looks,

then you're not as detached as you think.

Fine! I'll drink the fucking tea.

Nice, isn't it?

They love you, you know...

The people of Rize. You played for Rize, right?

Of course you did.

You're Savas the Great.

Of course!

That last-minute goal you scored was something to see.

You beat Trabzon that day.

That was really something.

Thirty thousand people.

Dead quiet.

How can you top that?

It's all downhill from there, right?

What else could ever compare?

Keep talking and I'll do it right in front of you.

They say a barking dog seldom bites.

Threats hurt your credibility. I'll go.

Are you crazy?

That's rich, coming from a man with a death wish.

Fuck right off now.

I'll go if you tell me what it was like after you scored that goal.

You walked off the field, and it was all downhill from there.

What happened to you, Savas? Tell me.

Tell me.

Does your wife know?

Savas!

Calm down.

Give me one good reason. It's not about soccer.

Not about your family. You're not sick. You're not mad.

Give me a reason, Savas. Tell me.

Is it about your wife?

Is there someone else?

She's dead.

What?

So what? We all die.

She hung herself.

Aylin, stop!

Sahir!

Make her leave!

Aylin, go away!

Leave!

Make her leave.

It's fine, Savas. She's gone.

You thought it was her, right?

You thought you saw her.

Do you see her often?

- You don't know. - I do.

- What do you know? - I still see her!

- You're lying. - My wife killed herself two years ago.

I see her everywhere I go.

Everywhere...

I try to talk to her, but she won't talk back.

I try touching her, but I can't.

- You're lying. - I'd give everything just to touch her.

I've tried killing myself so many times, but I can't bring myself to do it.

What if she's watching?

What if she sees that I can't do it.

She can watch all she wants. I don't care.

She did this to me.

You wouldn't want her to go through what you've gone through, would you?

I couldn't do this to her.

I can't take it. I can't do it anymore.

Do me a favor.

Do me a favor and I'll let you go.

Do me in first.

Then kill yourself.

- No. - I can't do it.

I'm begging you. Do it for me.

Save me from this life, too.

Do it, Savas!

No one gets it. No one but you.

Only you can get it.

I'm ready to go, Savas. Do it.

What if she disappeared altogether?

At least she's still there,

even if I can't touch her,

even if she doesn't say anything.

It's still something.

What if I die

and she's not there?

What if...

What if I never

see her ever again?

What if that's what hell is?

I'm here...

I'm here for you.

I'll handle the rest.

Sahir.

I'm sorry. I found out too late.

You shouldn't have removed your radio.

You shouldn't have...

His first wife...

Never feed me misinformation ever again.

Don't tell me what you don't know.

- The radio is so that... - No more mistakes.

He's sleeping.

I still wish...

You hadn't scored that goal.

Savas the Great.

Good morning.

Opening time already?

Have some tea.

Still can't sleep in your own bed?

You started seeing Ekin again?

Nothing out of the ordinary.

I thought you'd started seeing a therapist.

- Why would I? - It might help.

Even you've started talking to me about therapy.

I guess.

Stop smoking on an empty stomach.

- Never mind me. Look after yourself. - Why's that?

If something happens to you, there won't be anyone left who knows me.

Why not try getting to know yourself?

- I wish I could. - You don't have to do this, you know.

You're standing at the gates of hell, determined not to let anyone through.

- It's the only thing that helps. - Does it help the pain?

It does.

But the scars remain.

So this is you not in pain?

- What do you want from me? - Put something underneath that.

This is not how you get over death.

You're not God. You're not to blame for everything.

- It's not your fault. - Then whose is it?

- Sometimes there's no blame to be found. - No.

Ekin would still be here if it weren't for me. See?

They would've turned her into a vegetable. That's no life!

At least it's not death!

Ekin is dead.

You save them to atone for her.

The only one I'm saving is myself.

And I can't even do that!

I can't do it.

How else are you supposed to cope?

This is it.

You have any other ideas?

Then you keep going.

You stop whining.

You learn to take it.

You sleep in your own bed.

Where are you going?

Sit and eat.

Last night, for the first time in years, I looked myself in the mirror.

It was like

seeing a hollowed-out tree.

Excuse me.

Are you Sahir Kaan?

I'm Savas Kurtulus's daughter, Ayse.

I wanted to thank you in person.

We're eternally grateful.

This is my grandmother.

I'm sorry for what happened.

If you need anything...

I've been looking all over for you.

- What is it? - Just come with me.

Okay...

I'm sorry.

Come on, sit.

What's your problem?

Do you know how many complaints I get?

- Why would they complain? - You're reckless.

You never follow protocol.

You do anything and everything that you're not supposed to do.

You don't listen to anyone.

Tell them to mind their own business.

You're legally obliged to talk to a therapist.

But you're doing it.

He sucks.

Sahir, you can't keep doing this.

You can't take such risks.

You shouldn't have left him on the bridge.

When have I failed you when it counted?

Savas!

He jumped!

Oh, shit!

Is he dead?

Someone here to see you.

He left this for you.

Keep him in your thoughts.

WHAT IF WE GO AND THEY'RE THERE?

Hello?

Aylin, where exactly is it?

What's the name of the bar?

Ska2. That's where he was seen last.

Ska2.

OK, got it. I'm going in.

Let me know when you find it.

How did you get away?

Never mind that.

- Your father's alive. - What?

Keep your face hidden.

How?

How could he be alive?

It's all hidden in the algorithm in the watch.

Look what they have done to us.

Bilge, it's all in the watch. You have to solve it.

You're better at this than I am. You can find where he is.

Don't go! Don't leave me!

They don't know who you are. It's me they're after.

You need to stay hidden. I'll contact you when I can.

Are you in line for the...

Shit.

One... Three.. Two...

Three... Five...

Eight... 13...

21... 34...

25...

One... Two... Three... Five... Eight...

21... 34... 76... 89...

Ekin?

Ekin?

Come to the Kemerli bridge.

A woman is about to jump...

Go away!

Who are you?

Don't come any closer!

Who called me?

- Who are you? - I said go away!

Tell me who you are and I'll leave you to it.

I don't care.

Who are you?