Original subtitles

(bell rings)

? When I wake up in the morning and the alarm gives out a warning ?

? I don't think I'll ever make it on time ?

? By the time I grab my books and I give myself a look ?

? I'm at the corner just in time to see the bus fly by ?

? It's all right ?

? 'Cause I'm saved by the bell ?

? If the teacher pops a test I know I'm in a mess ?

? And my dog ate all my homework last night ?

? Ridin' low in my chair, she won't know that I'm there ?

? If I can hand it in tomorrow it will be all right ?

? It's all right ?

? 'Cause I'm saved by the bell... ?

? It's all right, 'cause I'm saved by the-- ?

? It's all right, 'cause I'm saved by the-- ?

? It's all right, 'cause I'm saved by the bell ?

Zack: What a week this is going to be.

Jessie's dad is getting married.

He's a manager of this luxury hotel in Palm Desert,

and he's invited the whole gang down for the wedding!

Maybe I'll get lucky and they'll throw me to the single girls,

instead of the bouquet!

Jessie told us this hotel was beautiful,

but I never expected this!

Health spa, golf course, swimming pool --

her father is the manager of heaven!

Yeah, and all these beautiful angels around here to prove it.

- What's up, Jess? - Okay, guys, we're all checked in.

My dad left a note. He and his fiancee will meet us for dinner.

I can't wait to meet her!

I can't believe your dad is getting remarried

and you've never even met the chick!

I mean babe.

I mean-- help me out here, Preppie!

- Woman. - That's it.

The reason is because it happened so fast.

They met here, fell in love, now they're getting married.

That's the most romantic story I've ever heard.

Let's get away from leaky eyes and check this place out.

Love struck once, it could happen again.

I can see how it'd be easy to fall in love here.

Woman: Hi.

Hey, I am in love now!

Zack, if you're going to drool, do it over the fountain.

She's just some aerobics bimbo.

If brains were dynamite, she wouldn't have enough to blow her nose.

That's a good point, but remember, airheads are people too.

And they make great dates.

Let's check out those hard bodies at the health spa.

I'm with you dudes. I want to try out my new book.

"Everything You Need to Know About Girls"?

Yep. Jessie's dad may not be the only one getting some action around here.

Whoa, this is serious.

Gentlemen, we have struck gold!

Let's work out.

I don't know about you, but working out is the last thing on my mind.

- I hear you, blood. - "I hear you, blood"?

Where did you get that?

Chapter 3, Talking Cool.

Is there a chapter on shutting up?

Let's go, Screech.

- Hi. - Hi.

I saw you in the lobby and I must say you are in great shape.

Well, I eat right, I get plenty of sleep,

and I teach six aerobics classes a day.

Oh... low impact or high?

- You know aerobics? - Yeah, you know, I don't want to brag,

but I'm the captain of our school's aerobics team.

Oh really? Maybe you'd like to join my class?

Well, how about a private workout?

No thanks, I've got a pretty full schedule.

So do I, but I can always make room for you.

If you're going to join my class, why don't we start warming up?

Okay. What do you suggest?

Why don't you give this one a try?

One and two.

Oh-- oh, yeah.

Beautiful. No problem.

Here we go. (groans)

I'm just-- you know-- warming up.

I'll see you in class.

Hi, is this boat taken?

(European accent) I don't think so.

I like it when the water's calm like this.

(giggles)

You might be wondering my name -- it's AC Slater,

from L.A.

I'm Christina.

That is a beautiful accent.

Let me guess. You're not from California.

No, I'm not. I'm from Europe.

Oh?

- Well, it was nice meeting you. - Hey, maybe I'll see you around.

Maybe.

"Say, foxy lady, want to run away with me?"

Run away with yourself, you geek!

(beeps)

How's my hair? Maybe I should have worn it up.

- It's beautiful. - What about my make-up?

- I didn't overdo it, did I? - It's great, Jessie.

- And my dress, is it-- - Jessie, you look fine.

We're having dinner with your dad, not Mel Gibson.

I'm sorry. I'm going to meet my future stepmom.

It's important I make the right impression.

What are these beautiful women doing in my hotel?

- Hi, Daddy! - Hi, sweetheart.

Kelly, Lisa, it's nice to see you.

Oh Jessie, you look beautiful.

Everything about you -- your hair, your make-up, your dress.

You look so grown up.

Thank you. What about you, Daddy?

You look so young. Not that you're old or anything.

Leslie makes me feel young.

You are going to love her, Jessie.

I can't wait to meet her. Where is she?

She should be here any minute.

- Why don't we sit down while we wait? - This way?

Come on over here. I've arranged a nice little table for us.

- I think you'll appreciate it. - I'll sit next to you.

- Here we are. - This is nice.

- Isn't this lovely? - Thank you.

- So, how are you enjoying the hotel? - It's wonderful.

Thank you so much for inviting us.

If you need someone to keep an eye on the place

while on your honeymoon, I'm available.

I'll remember that, Lisa.

- Hey! - Hi, guys!

- What happened to you, Zack? - Nothing a Jacuzzi won't cure.

He tried to impress some chick by straining every muscle in his body.

How are you doing with the ladies, Screech?

I've met a few babes, but I'm still waiting for Ms. Right.

You'll be waiting for a long time.

Lisa, with this book, even you would be putty in my hands.

For instance...

"You know, love kitten. I don't need to see the specials.

You're the catch of the day!"

That's good. May I see that, please?

- Sure. - Catch this.

Don't look now, but your airhead just blew in.

- I knew she couldn't resist me. - Hi, David.

Hi, Leslie.

Kids, I would like you to meet the future Mrs. Spano.

Oh my gosh! I hit on your mother!

You think that's bad? Jessie's dad is marrying the aerobics bimbo!

Would you calm down?

Leslie is a nice lady.

No, Zack, she's a nice girl!

I can't believe my dad is going to marry her.

I can't believe I tried to pick up on your stepmom!

I'm so embarrassed.

I'm embarrassed my dad is robbing the cradle!

There you are, Jessie. Why did you run off so fast?

You left before I got the chance

to ask you to be my maid of honor on Sunday.

Wow! Maid of honor -- what an honor!

- Gee, Leslie, I don't know. - What's your problem?

You get to stand up in front of a crowd in a beautiful gown.

I really can't.

- I don't have a gown. - I've already got one for you!

Just come by your dad's suite tomorrow morning for a fitting.

We are going to have so much fun!

Since we're here, why don't we take a boat out to the point

and see where we're getting married?

Come on, let's go!

Sorry, I'm gonna have to bail.

- Is something wrong, honey? - He doesn't want to know.

I have a really bad headache.

- Can I get you something? - No. I just need to lie down.

See you later, Daddy.

- Bye... everybody. - Bye.

Okay, give us the dirt. When did the sparks start flying?

Six months ago, David hired me to run the health spa.

Pretty soon, I was taking three aerobics classes a day.

He told me his doctor said he needed to get more exercise.

- And she bought it. - Doctor's orders?

- Pretty smooth there, Mr. S. - How did you finally get together?

I told her my doctor ordered me to take her to dinner.

You've got a great doctor!

Both: Aw!

- A sunset boat ride sounds wonderful. - You bet it is.

That's where David kissed me for the first time.

Sort of a miniature Love Boat.

Zack, you are so cute.

- Hey, Christina. - AC.

- How was the boat ride? - It was okay.

Just okay? That's because you went without me.

Would you care to take another lap?

You are a charmer.

Hold the boat! Hold the boat!

Why are you dressed like that, dork?

Sophisticated gentlemen dress suitably for every occasion, my darling.

Lisa, you wouldn't have any seasick pills, would you?

You ninny, it's only three feet of water!

So what? I get seasick in the bathtub.

You know, this is where David asked me to marry him.

- Well? - Well what?

- What did you say? - We're here for the wedding.

- What do you think she said? - Oh my gosh!

Congratulations, Mr. Spano!

It's amazing. He just keeps getting worse every year.

Over there is the point. That's where the wedding reception will be.

- Screech: Pointy. - And after that,

we leave for our honeymoon in New York.

It's getting late, and I have a long day tomorrow.

And I have an aerobics class at 6:00 a.m.!

- You're gonna be there, Zack? - Oh sure.

If I'm not on time, you can start without me.

- Right! - Good night, everybody.

- Enjoy yourselves. - Have a nice night.

It's gorgeous out here, isn't it?

You know, Zack, I kissed Lisa for the first time on a bridge.

- Oh yeah? When was that? - Right before I threw him off.

I still have the rock that I hit my head on.

Ah, memories...

- You have wonderful friends. - Yeah, they are great.

But I already know about them. I want to know about you.

- What do you want to know? - Just little stuff,

like how old you are, what's your last name, where do you live...

do you have a boyfriend?

17; von Hoffman; Lichtenburg; no.

Yes! It's a good start.

Now, is there anything else I need to know?

Yes. I am a princess.

That's cool. So is Lisa.

No, I mean, a real princess.

Yeah right, and I'm Michael Jordan!

Come on, who are you, really?

I'll tell you at another time.

Why don't we play golf tomorrow. Do you play?

Do I play golf? What, are you kidding?

Four!

You're really sore, huh?

Kelly, even my socks hurt!

Poor baby. Let me rub those shoulders.

Mmmm. Thank you.

Oh, thank you!

You know, this is exactly where I want to get married.

You still want to get married to Tom Cruise?

- Nah, hated his last movie. - Oh, I know what you mean.

That's why I broke it off with Kim Basinger.

I guess I'm old fashioned.

I don't need a movie star.

Just someone who's nice and who'll treat me like a lady.

You won't have any trouble finding a guy.

Oh.

It's getting cold.

Here, take my jacket.

How's that?

You know, you're still a gentleman.

Just like when we were going together.

Say, Lisa, it's getting a wee bit nippy out.

- Care to borrow my jacket? - No, thanks. I'm fine.

I insist. According to page 36,

"On a cool night, a gentleman always offers his jacket to a lady."

Here.

- Hi, guys. - Hey, I thought you had a headache.

Oh... it went away.

- Have you seen my father? - Yeah, he crashed for the night.

- I need to talk to him about Leslie. - Isn't she sweet?

- What a great stepmom to have! - Yeah. She's pretty, she's cool.

- She has a terrific fashion sense. - I don't know what he sees in her.

Are you crazy? The same thing I did -- she's hot!

I think he'd be better off with someone his own age.

What difference does age make? It's the person that counts.

- And Leslie's terrific! - Besides, she loves your dad.

She's nothing like my mom.

Good thing too. He divorced her!

Trust me, Jessie, she's a great lady. Give her a chance!

Whose side are you guys on anyway?

Excuse me. My headache's back.

Hey, hey--

- (dings) - There you go.

Man, you're really good.

That's what happens when you have a golf course in your backyard.

Yeah right. I suppose they're just next to the stables.

Actually no. The stables are down by the lake.

Go on, get out of here!

There we go.

Now, Kelly, keep your head down.

All right, and your eye on the ball.

Just follow through.

Smooth, easy. Ready?

- I made it! - All right, we still make a good team!

All right!

Could you show me that shot again, Christina?

Terrific, chaton.

Father, hello.

AC, I'd like you to meet my father, the king of Lichtenburg.

You mean, he's the--

then that means you're-- oh boy!

Hi!

Be with you in a second.

Christina, you weren't kidding! You really are a princess!

- Does it matter? - Well, yeah!

I mean, no.

I'm glad. It usually scares guys off.

- That's why I didn't tell you at first. - Is everything okay?

- Everything's great. - Oh yeah,

great, Your Highnesship!

- Is that what you call him? - No, I call him father.

So, can you give my daughter any competition?

She is tough to beat.

She putts around the palace all day.

I bet that moat's a real water hazard!

- AC, don't be nervous. - Me?

I'm not nervous. Excuse me.

Watch this.

Kelly: I'm gonna drown you!

Okay. Get away.

- Zack: Want the ball? - Okay.

- Go get it. - Way over there!

- Hey. - Hey, dude.

- What are you doing? - Just bagging some rays.

My book says chicks dig a guy with a savage tan.

Get rid of the book. Only an idiot would believe that stuff.

Au contraire, my blond friend,

this book predicted you and Kelly would get back together.

- Screech, you're crazy. - Huh-uh.

"First, the lady gives the gentleman a moonlight massage."

- My shoulders hurt. - Okay.

"Second, the gentleman offers his jacket to the lady."

- She was cold. - "Third,

- the lady buys the gentleman a drink." - There you go. Never happened.

Hey, Zack, I bought us a couple of sodas.

And she's not just a regular chick.

She's a princess. And she lives in a castle.

She must have huge closets.

Lisa, I'm serious.

Why would she like me? I'm a nobody compared to her.

Honey, first, you've got to stop thinking like a frog

and start acting like Prince Charming.

Yeah, I guess you're right. Thanks, Lisa.

No problem. Find out if she has any single brothers.

I brought some chocolate kisses.

Your favorite.

- Isn't she great, Jessie? - Oh yeah, a blast.

Better hop in this pool fast. I don't want to lose you to a younger guy.

You have nothing to worry about.

I think older men are very sexy.

Isn't this great? My two girls.

(chuckles) Yeah, one big happy family.

Here we go! I almost dropped you.

Here's a towel.

- There you go. - Thank you.

It's getting cold.

I know.

Did we... just kiss?

That's what it felt like to me.

- Kelly, I didn't plan-- - I know. Me neither.

I'd better go. See ya.

- I like this place. - Well, I hate it!

I guess it didn't go too well with your father, huh?

Nope. It's obvious that he's very much in love with Leslie.

It's just a shame I'm going to have to stop the wedding.

(instrumental theme music plays)

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