Original subtitles

♫ Yöu dwell in my heart. ♪

♫ Whether its dusk or dawn. ♪

♫ Whether in light or darkness. ♪

♫ Yöu're always with me. ♪

lt was my mother's dying wish..

..to take the entire 'Bhajan Mandli' group along with their family..

..on a trip to Badrinath.

Please do come.

Of course.

Please join us on the trip..

..and pray for my mother's soul.

Why do souls become restless after they die?

l mean, once yöu're dead it's the end of all problems.

Why become restless?

That's not it.

Suppose the deceased has a unfulfilled wish.

Then his son will fulfil it.

Yöu won't go on the trip.

Get that.

Her mother was in the hospital for two years.

And he didn't even come take a look.

He was making dollars in America.

This charade is for the world.

Not for his mother's soul.

No need to look so depressed..

..yöu won't get an off.

Get that.

Just one idol left!

By the way, where's the trip headed?

l can't believe yöu're coming with us.

The children are so happy.

She thinks l'm going for beholding the Lord.

♫ Krishna, Krishna, Hare, Hare. ♪

♫Hare Rama, Hare Krishna ♪

♫ Krishna, Krishna, Hare, Hare. ♪

Where is he?

A dozen of pot bellied Ganesh idols.

What!

And those 250 a peice Krishnas.

Eight of those brawny Hanumans.

What are yöu saying? - And five of those 'Sherawali'.

The lady sitting on the tiger.

What's the total?

Three dozen, sir. - Three dozen, right!

Then, three Sai Babas bonus. - What?

They are in a big demand.

Send it to the white Volvo parked there. - Okay.

Great, wine shop.

Hare Rama, Hare Krishna.

What did yöu give him?

Give me too.

Funny people, they're distributing alcohol like holy water.

What's that?

What should l say?

Water of Ganges. - Yes, yes.

Oh, give me some.

Why is it so bitter?

Because the Ganges is polluted.

Oh! - Yes.

♫ Hare Rama, Hare Krishna. ♪

♫Krishna, Krishna, Hare, Hare. ♪ - Mother.

♫Hare Rama, Hare Krishna. ♪

♫ Krishna, Krishna, Hare, Hare. ♪

Apologise. They were fasting.

Hello. - We were fasting.

And yöu gave us alcohol.

Alcohol is permitted in fasts.

lt's made from sugarcane.

lt fills yöu with energy, and makes yöu lightheaded.

Rascal. Keep the phone down. - Yöu'll never learn.

Abusing in the month of 'Shravan' (pious month).

See. Truth sounds bitter than liquor.

There's a limit to cracking jokes.

Papa, please.

What yöu did yesterday, is a sin in mummy's view.

And mummy's fasting today to repent for it.

l want to know.

How can she repent for my sins by fasting?

Sushila, it's like yöur phone's on charging..

..and my battery's getting charged.

Like wi-fi?

Chintu, careful.

Papa.

Get down.

Papa, we're practising.

Today's 'Janmastami'.

Yöu've yöur exams tomorrow.

Who will write that?

Get down!

Why do yöu always stop for religious things?

He'll be absolutely fine.

My son's playing Govinda.

My son won't become Govinda or Chunkey Pandey.

He'll grow up to become a cricketer.

Get down. Get down.

Put me down.

Mahadev. - Coming.

Let's go. - Come soon.

Listen. Remove the tag of Rs.250 from..

..all the new idols that we bought

Just watch how l sell them for 10-12 thousand.

And keep one idol from each on display.

Understand? - Yes.

Come on.

One and only one piece in the world.

This idol appeared from the ground..

..when the temple at Badrinath was being built.

What are yöu saying?

A great sage from Dwarka set out for a journey on foot..

..and that afternoon the sun was really scorching..

..l gave him a jug of water to drink.

He was so pleased.

And gave me this idol.

And this idol turned my luck around.

l bought this, once a rented shop..

..and a three room house in Bhooleshwar.

With terrace.

With terrace.

Amazing!

Mr. Kanji, sell this idol to me.

l am in big trouble.

l'll rot in hell if l even think of selling my Lord.

Sell the Lord? Look at what he's saying.

Mischievous... Lord.

Listen carefully.

Yöu can hear His flute.

lt's time for him to play His flute.

What are yöu saying? - Try to hear with devotion.

Listen. yöu can hear the echo of Gokul.

Heard it?

Can yöu hear? - Yes, yes.

Now leave. - Sell this idol to me.

Please, Mr. Kanji.

l'll let this idol out of my sight..

..only when that special person arrives.

The chosen one.

Who is that?

The sage had said that A great devotee of Sai..

..from Rajasthan will come for His ldol.

That's amazing. - What?

That's me. - No, no.

Look, there's my car.

RJ, Rajasthan.

And it also has an 'Om Sai' sticker.

That's true.

What did yöu say yöur name was?

Bhanwar Lal. - Bhanwar Lal?

Mahadev...it's him?

Who? - lt's him?

What happened? - The sage had written yöur name himself.

Look.

Bhanwar Lal.

l don't understand a word that's written here.

lt's written in Madrasi.

He was a Madrasi. Though he lived in Dwarka but, look..

Great.

This idol now belongs to yöu.

Thank yöu.

Great.

Kanji Money? - Bhanwar Lal.

Yöu only listen, but don't understand.

l said l won't charge yöu for this idol..

..but l will have to pay the sage.

Yes, of course.

Here yöu go. 100 rupees.

Only 100.. - Mahadev. Mahadev.

This is a question of devotion. We cannot force anyone.

Do yöu how much l had at that time?

Only 20 rupees.

Only 20 rupees. Remember?

So do yöu know what l did?

l was wearing a similar gold chain. And l gave that to him.

lt's all about faith.

Anything yöu give is less.

Anything yöu give is less.

Wow. What a thought.

Notjust my gold chain, l will give up my gold ring too.

That's it.

Here. Here yöu go. - Great, great. Discard yöur burden.

Discard all yöur burden.

Great, great.

Glory to.. - Lord Krishna!

Glory.

Now, where will this idol emerge from?

From the holy land of Mathura, where else?

Glory to Sri Kanji Lalji Mehta.

Glory to yöu.

As long as people believe in toys like this..

..our business will prosper.

Kanji. This is the God's idol, don't call it a toy.

The Lord is only a delusion. - Yes, let's go.

lsn't that Chintu?

Yes.

Yes, that's him. - Yes.

Yes. He's dancing so well. Serpent dance.

l'll put an end to all this.

Shut down the shop and get the scooter. - Yes.

Come on. Kanji. - Yes.

Look after my shop for a month.

Why? - l'm going on Haj.

l suggest that yöu get yöur shop fixed..

..rather than going on a Haj.

God save me from devils.

Yöur shop will come crashing down even if anyone sneezes.

Let's go. - Coming.

Give them seeds worth rs.10. - Okay.

Come on, start it quickly.

Glory to.. - Siddeshwar Maharaj.

Let the 'Janmastami' festivities begin.

♫ Go...go...go...Govinda. ♪

♫ Go...go...go...Govinda. ♪

♫ Go...go...go...Govinda. ♪

♫ Go...go...go...Govinda. ♪

Yöu're so striking.

lf yöu're fire, l am water.

lf yöu're the sky, we're the stars.

Yöu're so striking.

lf yöu're fire, l am water.

lf yöu're the sky, we're the stars.

Even if we've to lay down our lives.

But we promise.

We won't let yöu go.

♫ Go...go...go...Govinda. ♪

Yöu're so striking.

lf yöu're fire, l am water.

lf yöu're the sky, we're the stars.

Yöu're so striking.

lf yöu're fire, l am water.

lf yöu're the sky, we're the stars.

Even if we've to lay down our lives.

But we promise.

We won't let yöu go.

♫ Go...go...go...Govinda. ♪

♫ Go...go...go...Govinda. ♪

11, 12, 13. The heat's rising.

ln my body.

11, 12, 13...

11, 12, 13. The heat's rising.

ln my body.

Don't look now.

My eyes are spitting fire.

This sight looks so colourful.

Yöu're so talked about, yöu're so unique.

Even if we've to lay down our lives.

♫ But we promise. ♪

♫ We won't let yöu go. ♪

♫ Go...go...go...Govinda. ♪

Just one more place left to visit.

Mishra.

Yöu call me from Kashi for a day..

..and make me travel the entire day.

lt's a small area.

Once yöu give them yöur blessings..

..they'll cast their votes for me.

Glory to.. - Siddeshwar Maharaj.

♫ What's this fervour? ♪ ♫ What's this obsession? ♪

♫ What's this craze? ♪

♫ What's this fervour? ♪

♫ Tell me. Tell me. ♪

♫ What's this fervour? ♪ ♫ What's this obsession? ♪

♫ What's this craze? ♪

♫ What's this passion all around? ♪

♫ We'll lose ourselves in yöurjoy. ♪

♫ We'll lose ourselves in yöur devotion. ♪

♫ Even if we've to lay down our lives. ♪

♫ But we promise. ♪

♫ We won't let yöu go. ♪

♫ Go...go...go...Govinda. ♪

Look, Sonakshi Sinha.

She is Rowdy, my Rathore's in the next alley.

Let's go. Come on. - Yes.

Break the pot.

♫ Go...go...go...Govinda. ♪

♫ Go...go...go...Govinda. ♪

Begin with the festivities.

♫ Go...go...go...Govinda. ♪

♫ Go...go...go...Govinda. ♪

♫ Go...go...go...Govinda. ♪

♫ Go...go...go...Govinda. ♪

What's going on here. Move.

Get down.

♫ Go...go...go...Govinda. ♪

Come here. - Yes, yes.

♫ Go...go...go...Govinda. ♪

♫ Go...go...go...Govinda. ♪

break it. Break it.

Hear! Hear! Hear! Hear!

Calm down! Calm down!

lt's the Swami's orders.

Calm down!

Calm down! Calm down!

What orders?

Sri Siddeshwar Maharaj has just said..

..that Lord Krishna is very pleased..

..to see the crowd that has gathered around..

..for the 'Janmastami' festivities.

And today He'll eat milk and butter from His devotees.

Yes, he'll drink milk and eat butter.

And Siddeshwar Maharaj also says that..

..this auspicious opportunity will last only for an hour.

Only one hour.

So, yöur time begins now.

Go. Go. - Who is that imposter?

Hello, hello, hello.

Play. Play.

Go ahead, feed Him. - What's wrong with the mic?

See what's wrong? - What's wrong with the mic?

Where's everyone going?

Go, go. - No, wait.

Where are yöu going? - Go.

Play, play harder. - Wait everyone, wait.

Even Siddeshwar Maharaj is asking yöu to go.

Go, leave. - Wait.

What have yöu done?

No, papa. No. - Stupid fool, breaking pots during yöur exams.

Stop it, stop it.

Go and feed Him butter.

l won't spare yöu next time.

Stop yöu fool!

Yöu'll be punished for yöur unpardonable sin.

He will punish yöu Himself.

Punish me?

Don't try to scare me in the name of Lord.

l'll see what He does to me.

Go home, it's going to rain.

Yöu'll get drenched.

lt's an earthquake.

Swamiji Rain?

Rain?

My hand's paining.

l won't be able to write my exam tomorrow.

l'll slap yöu.

l'll make yöu hold the pen in yöur mouth and write yöur paper.

Yöu're scolding him.

But what about yöu? - What did l do?

What?

The festivities were left incomplete.

Yöu've to admit that there's God.

Yöu spread the rumour..

..and immediately there was an earthquake.

Remember. - What earthquake?

Even the utensils didn't budge.

Papa.

l think they took yöur announcement too seriously.

This news just came in from parts of the country..

..that the idol of Sri Krishna's eating butter.

ls the Lord eating butter? - No.

Priest, offer the Lord some buttermilk.

People are offering cheese, cottage-cheese..

..butter, buttermilk to the idol of Krishna. - Oh, God!

The rumour has spread so far.

Please, eat it.

This is low-cholesterol cheese.

The Lord's so lucky.

Look at the things He's getting.

Earlier, people would keep it in a covered platter..

..in front of Him.

But now they're feeding Him.

Let Him enjoy.

lt's yöur fault.

Mumbai just experienced a slight earthquake tremor..

..of 3.5 Richter scale, which didn't cause..

..any harm to life or property.

See. Heard that?

But a shop in the flea market has collapsed..

..which was closed at that time.

Must be Mohammad's shop.

According to our sources..

..the shop was registered to Mr. Kanji Lalji Mehta.

lt's really surprising, because..

..there are other old shops in this market which are still intact.

But Kanji Lalji Mehta's shop has been completely destroyed.

This is Shweta Tiwari, with cameraman Vaibhav Mishra, ABP News.

Sister, switch on ABP News quickly.

We saw.

Brother-in-law's shop is gone. lt's collapsed.

Pravin! - Calm down, father.

No, sister. Come there with the children.

l'm coming there with father and the others. - Yes.

Yes, we're coming.

We're coming.

The idols of Gods have gone underneath.

The shop is completely ruined

Doesn't seem like there was ever a shop here.

What are yöu saying?

We had goods worth 25 lakhs.

And we'll have to pay the scrap dealer..

..to have this cleared.

Why pay?

We'll give him one of the broken idols..

..and say lt appeared from the ground in Amarnath.

What are yöu saying, brother-in-law?

Yöu'll soon be bankrupt.

Do yöu know the losses yöu've incurred?

40 lakhs.

Goods worth 25 lakhs bought on credit..

..and 15 lakhs spent on renovation last month.

40 lakhs? Where did yöu get that kind of money?

We borrowed a part of the amount by mortgaging the house.

And l borrowed 10 lakhs from a friend.

And 5 lakhs from yöur own pocket..

Pravin, yöu fool.

Yöu didn't even ask me.

How will we arrange for such a huge sum?

There's hardly 30400 thousand in the bank.

And we don't even have jewellery.

Sushila. We'll manage. - How?

Why don't yöu understand?

lf yöu hadn't spoken ill about the Lord..

..He wouldn't have caused this earthquake.

His justice is silent.

Will yöu please stop preaching?

Yöu mean to say, that the Lord..

..who doesn't exist, razed down my shop..

..because l spoke ill about Him?

So, just to prove Himself..

..he razed down just my shop in a fit of rage.

And if l still don't believe in Him..

..he will make me incur more losses? - Yes.

What yes?

l still don't believe in Yöu?

l haven't incurred any loss.

Look.

What's he doing? - What..

Everything's lost, Kanji.

Only thing left is this Godrej safe.

Rolex.

lt's a Rolex. - No.

Mr. Dinesh. lsn't that a Rolex watch yöu're wearing?

Must be worth 1 .5 -2 lakhs.

lt's worth 10.

Mr. Kanji.

l am sure yöu read the terms and conditions..

..before reading the policy.

Not at all, sir.

Yöur officer asked me to sign at the places marked..

..and l did so.

How irresponsible yöu are.

What happened, sir?

Yöur policy insures yöu against..

..accidents like theft, fire, fraud.

Right. That's what we opted for.

But not against Act of God.

Act of God?

See, it's written here clearly.

Conditions apply.

My glasses.. - ln the event of loss or damage to the property..

..the insurance company is not liable to pay..

..any amount if the damage is caused by act of God.

And here are yöur signatures.

lt's written in such small letters.

And nobody reads that.

What is 'Act of God'?

lncidents that are not caused by humans.

Like? - Like earthquake, Tsunami, Thunder.

Yöu cannot claim insurance in such cases.

Because these are natural calamities.

But l don't believe in God.

Tell him.

l don't care if yöu do or don't.

Yöu're signatures are right here.

l am so sorry.

Sorry? What sorry?

Sir.

Sir, l've invested my entire earnings in the shop.

Even my house is mortgaged.

And yöu're saying sorry.

l know, but yöur claim cannot be approved.

Yöu may go now.

No, sir. l won't leave until my claim isn't approved.

Security.

Sir.. Sir, why are yöu calling security?

l'm talking to yöu decently. - Yes, sir.

Take him away, please. - Why call the security..

Come on. - Just a minute.

Just a minute.

Come on.

Yöu just know how to swindle our money.

Mind yöur language.

Yöu should be publicly beaten.

Throw him out.

Get out! Get out!

Yöu get this for 2000 in the flea market.

Don't yöu understand?

lt's Act of God.

Yöu want money, don't yöu? Go and ask God. Take him away.

Act of God.

Just a second. Just a second.

Leave me.

Act of God.

So, yöu believe in God. - Yes.

Yöu believe that God is present everywhere.

ln him, him, that madam, him.

God dwells in everyone. - Yes.

And me?

Mr. Dinesh, yöu believe that God dwells in me too.

Yes.

Thank yöu.

Act of God. l didn't do it.

God did. lt's 'Act of God'.

God slapped him again. l didn't do it.

And now God will shoot yöu.. And yöu will die.

Later, will yöur family get the claim..

..or will that be 'Act of God' as well?

Tell me. - No.

Kanji, what are yöu doing?

Why are yöu scared? Take the gun.

Get down now, come on.

The phone's ringing again.

Forget it.

Yöu switched of yöur mobile..

..that's why they're calling on the landline now.

Tell them l am not at home.

They say if we don't arrange for the money..

..we'll have to vacate the house in a month.

l had so many dreams.

l wanted to make Jigna a pilot.

And my son a cricketer.

But soon l'll even lose this house.

Everything's lost.

Everything will be fine.

What will be fine?

All l have is the shop property.

l'll sell that and repay the mortgage.

Om Jai Jagdish Hare.

Swami..

Yes. Yes, he's here.

lt's Nimish. - Who?

Who Nimish bhai? - The estate agent.

Oh yes.

Yes, Nimish. Go ahead.

Did yöu find a buyer for that property?

What are yöu saying?

What happened?

What happened?

He's saying, there are broken idols of God on that land..

..so it's become inauspicious.

The place has become cursed. - Oh, God!

No one will buy this land..

..that's the rumour in the market.

Nimish. 100 years later, when people find..

..idols of God under that land, the prices will shoot up by 4 times.

Four times.

And people will construct a temple there as well.

lf anyone wants the buy the land he can..

..otherwise l care a damn.

What now?

l've an idea.

What are yöu doing, Kanji?

Suicide!

Sister-in-law, suicide..

Papa. - Where?

Leave me.

What are yöu doing? - Papa..

l am not a coward.

l will file a case.

Have yöu lost it?

He's gone crazy.

Yöu will file a case against an insurance company..

..worth 3000 crores!

l'm sure there are many others like yöu..

..who have filed a case against the insurance company.

There must be others like me who might have filed a case..

..but no ever filed a case against yöur Kishen.

l...will...file a case against yöur God.

What are yöu doing?

♫ Who controls this world? ♪

♫ Who's that sitting high up in the sky? ♪

♫ Why are Yöu hiding behind the clouds? ♪

♫ Why are Yöu afraid of being seen? ♪

Kanji. - Yes.

How will yöu fight the case?

That's simple.

lf yöur Lord can appear in the temple..

..from 9-12 and 4-7, then he's free from 1240.

He can appear in the court at that time.

What do yöu need? Tell me.

Agreement, affidavit, anything yöu need.

l will make it. Come with me.

One minute. - l've high contacts.

Just tell me what yöu need?

High contacts? - Yes.

l want to send a notice. - Come with me.

Come on.

So, who do yöu want to serve the notice to?

'Bhagwan' (God).

So, Mr. Bhagwan

Surname?

Surname?

He must have a last name?

Sharma, Verma, Kapoor, Khanna, Desai, anything.

Don't know, because we haven't met.

l see.

No. - Yöu two haven't met?

No. - That's fine.

What's his crime? Crime.

He has ruined me.

What? Yöu just said yöu two haven't met.

This Mr. Bhagwan must live somewhere.

Resident? - Who do l send the notice too?

People say that He lives in temples.

l see...

What?

Which 'Bhagwan' are yöu talking about? - Sit.

He has many names, which ones should l say?

Krishna, Ram, Brahma, Vishnu, Mahesh.

Sai Baba. - lt's a sin.

Hanumanji. Balaji...

And ladies too.

Durga, Saraswati, Parvati, Santoshi.

Yöu've lost yöur mind!

Wasting my time.

Get lost. Come on.

Mad man.

The nerve he has. Come on.

Don't trouble me.

Leave me alone.

Go to someone else.

l plead yöu.

Wait a minute, l'm a Hindu.

♫ Hari Bol. Speak now, reveal the secrets. ♪

The person we're going to see now is a famed lawyer.

lf he says yes, ourjob will be done.

Yes, sir. Which floor?

Lift's out of order?

1 1th floor.

l forgot the key to the scooter. l'll be right back.

Come on.

♫ He's witty, sells lies. ♪

♫ Kanji's cleverness is known everywhere. ♪

♫ He's witty, sells lies. ♪

♫ Kanji's cleverness is known everywhere. ♪

♫ He locked horns with God. ♪

♫ And invited trouble for himself. ♪

♫ He always speaks the truth. ♪

♫ His honesty is unique. ♪

Mr. Lawyer. - Yes.

Religious.

Kanji. - Go back, we're at the wrong place.

Are yöu with him?

Stop, stop.

Excuse me, where does advocate Hanif Qureshi live?

Up ahead.

ls Hanif at home? - Yes.

Come. Father's inside.

Hello.

Yöu seem to be in trouble.

ln the last riots, l defended some innocent Hindus.

And my own people did this to me.

Father cannot walk.

But yöu want to fight..

..with the One who created yöur entire community.

Will yöu flee?

l've no other option left.

l won't run.

Look, l cannot fight yöur case in this condition..

..but if the lawyers refuse to take up yöur case..

..then according to the law yöu can defend yöur own case.

ls that possible? - Yes, there's a provision in the law.

lf yöu want l can prepare yöur legal notice.

l'll be grateful to yöu, Hanif.

Thank yöu.

Hanif. Do yöu believe in Allah?

Of course.

God, Allah, they are all the same.

So, l am fighting against Him.

So, why are yöu helping me?

Yöu're not the only pleader.

Everyone does.

Some pleads to Him, and some against Him.

Where do yöu want to send this notice?

l don't have his... Address.

No. - Then.

The judge will dismiss yöur case in the first hearing.

l mean, l don't have His address..

..but of the places where people look for Him.

♫ Yöu're our benefactor, our friend. ♪

♫ So scare us. ♪

♫ Why ruin our present, by telling us about an unknown future. ♪

♫ Yöu're our benefactor, our friend. ♪

♫ So scare us. ♪

♫ Why ruin our present, by telling us about an unknown future. ♪

♫ Yöur saints and sages, spread shams in Yöur name. ♪

♫ They put a price tag on yöu. ♪

♫ What's money got to do in devotion? ♪

♫ Hari Bol. ♪

♫ Speak now, reveal the secrets. ♪

♫ Speak up. ♪

♫ Hari Bol. ♪

Hello. Relax, just relax.

The shop in flea market..

..which collapsed a few days ago due to the earthquake..

..the owner of that shop, Kanji Lalji Mehta..

..has filed a case against God.

This is the reaction of people over the matter.

Down with.. - Kanji!

Just relax.

This case won't be accepted in the court.

Trust me.

Just leave it to me.

Yöu won't even have to come to the court.

Relax.

Glory to.. - Leeladhar Maharaj!

Glory to.. - Leeladhar Maharaj!

Glory to.. - Leeladhar Maharaj!

Glory to.. - Leeladhar Maharaj!

Glory to.. - Leeladhar Maharaj!

Glory to.. - Leeladhar Maharaj!

Glory to.. - Leeladhar Maharaj!

Greetings.

l feel we should meet that person once..

..and listen to his problems, and try to understand.

Well, l..

Although we all hold different positions..

..in different communities.

But our God is one.

Later.

And today, a human has accused our God.

This is not a personal war.

lnstead, it's a battle for all humans..

..who have faith in God.

So l've decided that l, Siddeshwar Maharaj..

..and Gopi Maiyya, will go to the court..

..to give that shameless human a fitting reply.

Down with.. - Kanji!

Yes, it's a democracy, where everyone is treated equally.

And now, even God.

Even God will have to stand in the High Court's witness box..

..where the most dangerous criminals stand for trial.

Strange, but true.

l still say, think about it once.

l already have.

Today's the first hearing..

..and the judge will decide whether..

..such a case can be accepted or not.

lt's a good omen.

Really nice. Let's go.

Many believers are standing outside the court shouting slogans against Kanji.

Down with.. - Kanji!

Down with.. - Kanji!

Down with.. - Kanji!

Down with.. - Kanji!

Down with.. - Kanji!

Many 'dharma gurus' have come to the court..

..to give a reply of Kanji's baseless allegations.

Very few people have been allowed in the courtroom as well.

Swami, give me yöur blessings.

Move aside, no one will touch the swami.

Move aside, move aside.

Down with.. - Kanji!

Down with.. - Kanji!

Down with.. - Kanji!

Down with.. - Kanji!

Down with.. - Kanji!

Down with.. - Kanji!

Kanji, people say yöu're doing this for publicity?

Down with.. - Kanji!

Down with.. - Kanji!

Down with.. - Kanji!

Yöu? - Yöu will sit here.

Sit, sit.

Hey insurance..

How's the Rolex?

Working fine.

Relax.

Relax.

He's the one who spread the rumour about God eating butter.

All rise.

Kanji, get up.

Mr. Kanji Lalji Mehta. - Yes, sir.

We've been informed that yöu'll defend yöur own case.

Yes..

l don't have any other option, Yöur Honour.

The other lawyers are scared.

So, l'll have to defend this case..

My lordship, this is a baseless appeal.

A publicity stunt.

There's no cause of action that can be proved in court.

So l suggest, under order 7 rule no.1 1 ..

..of the code of civil procedure.

This case be straightaway dismissed..

..for out of cause action.

Yöur Honour, my English isn't that good..

..but l do understand that he's asking..

..to shut down this case immediately.

Right? Yöu're right.

l don't want to get into this hassle in the first place.

l'm a Gujarati, businessman.

doesn't make a difference to me.

The insurance people said that..

..God has razed down my shop.

Or, he's the One behind yöur shop's destruction.

So, l said fine. Ask God to compensate for my losses.

Case closed.

But why will God raze down yöur shop?

Fool!

Please.

Please come to the witness box and speak.

May Lord forgive his naiveness.

May Lord forgive his naiveness.

May Lord forgive his naiveness.

Why will God raze down my shop?

Exactly, why will God raze down my shop?

He has other important things to do.

So, tell the insurance company to pay me.

End of matter.

Why will the insurance company pay yöu?

Yöu've agreed to the terms and conditions..

..of the insurance company.

Exhibit no.1 , sir.

Right. Then God will have to compensate for it.

Call upon, Lord Ram, Shiva, Ganpati..

..Whoever yöu get along better with.

Do some of yöur hocus-pocus, or.. - Fool!

The only way to find God is through salvation.

God won't descend down on earth..

..for a ordinary man like yöu.

He would only if He exists.

Yöu're turnover is in millions, and this is a small settlement.

Just say yes.

l will even give yöu cash discount. Really.

l object, Yöur Honour.

Mr. Kanji is calling service to God a business.

Of course it's business.

Take a visit to any religious place.

First yöu've to pay for parking.

Then, pay for standing in the smaller queue.

Then pay for the flowers, blanket, candle.

And the donation box is kept right before the idol.

As soon as yöu bow down, yöu've to put something in it.

And they even charge for the offerings of God.

Just like we're charged for seeing wax statues in the museum.

Similarly, they charge us for seeing the stone idols in temples.

And the priests have salaries as well.

His is less, and his is more.

And yöu even have income tax benefits.

Right?

So, where's the service?

And, Yöur Honour, there's never recession in this business.

No.

ln fact, they do better business during recession.

Oh, God! Oh my, God!

Relax.

Consider that it is a business.

Still, why are yöu asking them for compensation?

Yöu pay premiums for yöur insurance..

..so yöu can ask them for a compensation.

But why will the temple pay yöu?

Because...l've paid premiums in their temples as well. - What?

What nonsense?

l knew yöu won't believe me..

..so l have brought all the proofs along.

Look. These are the receipts of the premium..

..l've been paying for the last 18 years.

On my wife's advice.

Look

My first premium was for 1501 rupees..

There's a well-known temple in the South. l paid it there.

Then, l've been paying 1000 rupees every year..

..at Lord Ganesha's stall.

lt's called a mandap.

And, yöur honour, my mother-in-law used to be very sick.

So, the temple authorities said, Pay us 11,000..

..perform a veneration and watch the miracle.

We performed the veneration and my mother-in-law passed away.

That was a good thing, but l also lost 11,000.

And they didn't refund a single rupee.

And then, donation at the mosque..

..blanket at the shrine, candle at church, alms for beggar..

..incense sticks, veil for Mother Goddess.

ln total l've paid around 10 lakhs in all these stores.

Enough!

Enough!

Don't call it a store.

lt's called a temple.

And people donate willingly at the temple..

..for the peace and prosperity of their family.

Even l gave this amount..

..for the peace and prosperity of my family.

And not for fun.

But yöur God snatched all the peace from my life.

Because only God can cause earthquakes.

Humans cannot do it.

So tell me, don't l've a right to ask God for compensation?

Mr. Kanji.

Yöu've a tiff with God, don't yöu? - Yes.

So why don't yöu ask Him directly for compensation?

Why are yöu asking the temples?

Which company supplies electricity to yöur home?

Reliance. - Reliance.

So if there's an electricity problem in yöur home..

..yöu will call up the Reliance office, won't yöu?

Yöu won't call Anil Ambani directly.

Mr. Anil, we've a electricity problem.

Silence.

What do yöu mean?

What do yöu mean?

These priests, the saints are officers of God. - No.

They aren't officers.

Officers are educated people.

They are...

They are salesmen, Yöur Honour.

They are collection agents..

..because they own God's franchise.

Yöur Honour.

This man's an atheist.

He doesn't know what he's saying.

But, we are saints.

We will forgive him.

But the world will never forgive him for this grave sin.

Yöu won't be able to set foot out of yöur house..

..if yöu say anything else.

ls that yöur concern for me..

..or are yöu threatening me in front of the judge?

We...are concerned for yöu.

They pay me up quickly. End this matter.

My lord, this is enough.

The donation receipts, the submissions.

There's no agency agreement between God and my clients.

Kanji is saying baseless things.

We cannot file a case against God for such a small thing.

Small?

My lord, this isn't small issue.

That shop means everything to me.

My means of earning.

The only way to support my family.

And l built that shop with hard work.

Now, it's just a piece of land.

And no one's ready to buy that as well.

These people say, Donate with faith..

..and yöu'll never be wronged.

And the insurance people say Pay yöur premiums on time..

..we're there in yöur troubled times.

l gave donations and also paid my premiums.

But none of them are willing to help me.

l am an ordinary human.

A middle-class man.

My family, my wife and children..

..will be forced to live on streets.

No, my lord.

Yöu'll have to give me a chance to defend my case in this court.

And the constituency of lndia gives me the right..

..to voice my plea in this court.

So please, my lord.

One crore is a big amount for a middle-class businessman.

And especially, when it's a question of his survival.

So, the court accepts Kanji Lalji Mehta's case.

Silence.

And only after carefully examining..

..all the evidences and arguments..

..the court will give its verdict, whether..

..Mr. Mr. Kanji Lal will get his compensation or not.

And if he does, then who will pay him?

The insurance company or, the temple.

The court's adjourned for the day.

Wait. Wait.

Yöu can perform all the veneration yöu want..

..and ring those bells as many times yöu wish.

Yöur God razed down my shop.

And now, l will alone shut down all his shops..

..or my name isn't Kanji Lalji Mehta.

And this isn't my concern for yöu.

lt's a direct warning.

Yes.

Yöu're safe here, it's a government property.

But how will yöu escape them?

Down with.. - Kanji!

Down with.. - Kanji!

Down with.. - Kanji!

Down with.. - Kanji!

Down with.. - Kanji!

Down with.. - Kanji!

Down with.. - Kanji!

Sir. The case has been accepted.

l'm worried about Sushila and the children.

l'll take a cab, yöu go.

But how can l leave yöu alone.

l'm going to the police station, for protection.

Drop her home as well. Go.

Be careful, dear.

Go, go, go.

Are the boys ready?

Remember.

Kanji shouldn't get to see daylight. That's it.

There he is.

Catch him. There he goes.

Don't let him go.

♫ Go...go...go...Govinda. ♪

♫ govinda aala re.. ♪

♫ Go...go...go...Govinda. ♪

♫ Go...go...go...Govinda. ♪

♫ Go...go...go...Govinda. ♪

Let's sit down and talk.

All l did was file a case.

lf yöu try to talk they'll cut yöu in half.

Look behind.

Catch him.

Faster!

Who are yöu?

Krishna Vasudev Yadav.

What?

Krishna Vasudev Yadav from Gokul.

So yöu're from UP.

Yöu can call me Kanhaiyya.

Catch him, catch him.

Catch him.

Careful.

Are yöu a man or a stuntman?

Yöu can call me a stuntman as well.

But people call my stunts a miracle.

Miracle. - Hold on.

Yöu aren't wearing a helmet either.

There he is.

There's a lot of traffic on earth.

Where do yöu think yöu're going, go that way.

Drive on the road.

Faster!

♫ Go...go...go...Govinda. ♪

That was a narrow escape.

Now, take me to Brahmanwadi.

Go straight then take a left, then right and another left.

And yöu'll be home, go on.

Yöu brought me this far, so drop me home as well.

My job's to show the way..

..it's yöurjob to get to the destination.

Keep it.

Thank yöu so much.

Yöu're so kind. - Thank yöu.

Take care. ♫ Go...go...go...Govinda. ♪

Papa! - Sushila.

ls everything fine?

Go up and take a look in the house, yöu'll know.

Thankfully we survived, otherwise..

No, l'll talk to the police.

Don't worry.

They hurled stones and acid bottles in our house.

l don't care lf l die.

But the children.

lf Jigna would've been hit by that acid..

l won't let anything happen to them.

l am their father. Please.

So, understand the duties of a father.

Withdraw the case. - Yöu're a fool.

l'm about to lose my house.

Where will we stay?

On the streets, or in their house?

Do we have any other option? Why don't yöu understand?

Come on, Jigna. Sit in the car.

He's made a mess of things.

l won't leave papa.

l'll slap yöu if yöu refuse. - No, mother.

Come inside, sit inside.

Please..

Hello.

Hello.

Who is it? - Bhagwan (God).

What?

lf yöu were a Muslim, l would've said Allah.

lf yöu were a Christian, then Jesus Christ.

Yöu're a Hindu, so Krishna.

Yöu, here?

Yöu're an excellent stuntman, really.

Very good.

l'm sure yöu're acting is decent as well.

Why don't yöu approach some television channel?

They keep remaking Ramayan and Mahabharat.

Krishna.

Suited-booted Krishna.

Here to teach me a lesson.

Look.

Look there.

Gods are bare-bodied.

Like this.

They're never fully covered.

That's yöur wedding photo, right? - Yes.

Wearing that traditional attire.

So, did yöu only wear a traditional attire..

..since yöur wedding?

No, right? - No.

See. That's our older image.

Conch in one hand, mace in the other.

Where are yöurs?

lf l keep holding them all day, won't my arms hurt?

Think.

Actually, our latest photos haven't been updated on Facebook.

People still use the older ones, and we let them.

We don't have a problem.

Let them. - That's enough.

Yöu're boring me now. Get out, leave.

Mahadev!

Mahadev! - Only yöu can hear and see me.

Yes, coming. Coming.

Mahadev!

What happened? What happened, Kanji?

See him.

He calls himself God.

l can see him.

He can see yöu.

My name's Krishna, yöur new neighbour.

Neighbour?

Neighbour?

The person Kanji had mortgaged his house to..

..has sold it to me.

Here are the documents.

And, Kanji bhai, sorry for thatjoke about God.

What's this?

How can he sell my house to him?

l was about to pay him on time.

l already paid him.

This isn't done.

This is my house. Nobody can just buy it.

Relax. Chill.

When yöu get yöur compensation from God..

..yöu can repay me, l will leave.

And anyway, l always leave after my project is over.

Why buy the house when yöu want to leave?

Are yöu a agent?

l am not that low.

l've a consultancy firm.

l give advice to people. - Advice.

Anyone who thinks of me.

Public service. Service open to all.

A solution to every problem.

Sometimes it gets slightly delayed.

But...l always get there on time.

There's delay but not denial.

Just like l came here, to help Kanji bhai.

Help me?

l found out about yöur condition..

..only after l brought the house.

The court case, lost yöur shop..

..and yöur wife and children too.

Kanji bhai, don't worry.

Yöu can stay here.

ln return, l will only use yöur things.

Television, fridge, etcetera.

Fine, but remember..

..one day l will buy this house back from yöu.

So be it!

l mean, l promise.

He's a nice man. - Something yöu said.

No, just.. Cheers.

Calls himself God. l think he's drunk.

Thank yöu, for letting me stay in my own house.

Thank yöu so much.

Thank yöu.

l will sleep outside on the terrace.

And yöu can sleep wherever yöu want.

lt's yöur house.

Thank yöu. Goodnight.

And yes, the light switch is at the back.

Switch off the lights before yöu go to sleep.

Another power failure.

No. yöu switched it off. - No, l didn't.

Yöu're drunk.

So?

l see.

♫ Go...go...go...Govinda. ♪

♫ Go...go...go...Govinda. ♪

♫ Go...go...go...Govinda. ♪

Case on God admitted. Paper, paper, paper.

High Court has put it's seal on it.

Through the notice prepared by advocate Hanif Qureshi..

..Kanji Lalji Mehta's case on God has been accepted.

l think he's mad.

l'm leaving.

Hey Jigna, what happened?

See, his wife ran away.

Who can live with that madman?

l don't even talk to him.

Or the Lord might punish us as well.

What a splendid bike. - But, who is he?

l think he arrived just last night.

Who's playing this classical music?

l've heard that the new guest is really handsome.

Don't l look handsome?

Get inside.

Hey, Hari Prasad.

Hey, Chaurasiya.

What's all this?

l was waking up the birds!

What? Who?

l was waking up the birds!

Practice. l was practising.

lt's a good thing to do in the morning.

Don't do it. Don't do all this in my house.

lt's yöur house yöu can play anything yöu want.

Good morning. - What?

Not me, there's a lady in yöur house.

Hello.

Hello.

l brought breakfast.

l thought since sister-in-law isn't home, so.. - No need.

l'll have bread and butter.

Where's the butter?

l ate it.

There was half a kilo of butter in there, yöu ate it all.

lt's my favourite thing. So l ate it.

Tell me one thing.

Why do they make it so salty?

Just like his name.

Are yöu all alone?

Yöur wife? - Of course.

Sixteen thousand.. - What?

She lives in Sholapur.

What did yöu hear? - Sixteen thousand.

No, she lives in Sholapur.

He can't handle one..

..how can l have sixteen thousand.

Please go. He's a big liar.

He was boring me yesterday.

Please go. - Give it.

lf yöu eat all that yöu'll get a stomach ache.

First half a kilo of butter and now this.

l'll be fine.

Hello. - Sir, l'm speaking from ABP News.

l am standing below yöur house.

Sir.

Look, l don't want to be a piece of news for yöu.

And don't call me again.

Sir, just one interview.

Since he filed a case against God, he's become alone.

One has to tread on such a path alone.

Let's see how far our friend goes.

The advocate who prepared Kanji's notice.

He lives that way.

Excuse me, advocate Hanif Qureshi.

He lives right there.

Where does advocate Hanif Qureshi live?

He lives right there.

Advocate Hanif Qureshi lives there.

155 letters, and calls too.

Bhuj, Latur, Vishakapatnam.

Their claims haven't been approved..

..for the past few years due to 'Act of God'.

All they all want yöu to defend their cases.

Son, l've lost my house in the earthquake.

My son and his wife died too.

This is my grandson.

His cancer needs to be operated.

lf l get the insurance money, everything will be alright.

This is Aslam.

Hello. - Hello.

He lost everything in the Tsunami.

He lost all the money he had saved for his sister's marriage.

So yöu file a case too.

l'll be cast out..

..if l go against the priest or community.

Look, Aslam. Yöu aren't going against anyone.

Those who taught yöu religion, taught yöu to pray..

..yöu're just questioning them why Allah did this to yöu.

But, the priest.. - Aslam.

When yöu lose yöur home..

..will the priest let yöu stay in his house?

Religion is for people, people aren't made for religion.

Hanif, how long will it take to ready their papers?

As long as it will take me to type.

Let's begin.

First one crore, and now claims worth 400 crores.

Kanji Mehta!

Advocate Sardesai is caught between..

..the insurance company and religious organizations.

For God's sake, prove that God exists.

And...and... make God pay all this!

The temples, mosques, churches, they will pay everything.

Kanji.

Wasn't yöur fight with yöur God?

Silence please! - So why call me here?

Priest, how can l say which God of which religion..

..was behind this earthquake, or that Tsunami?

That's yöur department.

Yöur Honour, they're in constant touch with God.

They're always in contact.

Why don't yöu tell me Who was responsible?

Why would our God harm people of our own religion?

God will never do such a thing!

Silence. - He loves his children!

Allah doesn't hate his followers either!

Relax. - Please be seated.

The court needs some time to study all these cases.

Anyone related to this case cannot leave the country.

What?

Court is adjourned.

Long live.. - Kanji!

Long live.. - Kanji!

Long live.. - Kanji!

Long live.. - Kanji!

Long live.. - Kanji!

Long live.. - Kanji!

Long live.. - Kanji!

Long live.. - Kanji!

This is government property, yöu're safe here.

But how will yöu escape them, in temples, churches and mosques?

What are yöu thinking, Leeladhar?

This has gone beyond the limit.

Stop all the shams that yöu're running in the name of faith.

Otherwise, the day isn't far when..

..no one will even spare alms in the name of God.

Thank yöu.

Yöu don't understand, Leeladhar.. - Thank yöu.

This is actually a serious matter.

People are making him a hero..

..and the claim amount is increasing.

Will yöu just tell us about the problems or do something?

Next week, l've a religious programme..

..on the Star Cruise, in Singapore

And the judge says l cannot leave the country.

Do something. - l would.

But it's the court, not the parliament..

..where we can break a few chairs and the job's done.

lt's the court.

Let me think.

Well, there's one way.

l know it's an old idea..

..but these days it's a lot in fashion.

Laxman Mishra guarantees..

..that yöu'll get the sympathy of people.

l guarantee it.

Thank yöu.

Lord blessed us with everything.

The earth, the air, water, the flora, fauna, everything.

Did He ever ask us for service tax? - No?

Did he ever ask us for sales tax? - No.

And today, a madman has dragged Him to court..

..so, will we stay quiet? - No.

We will fight.

We will fight together.

And so, guiding us on this path, our beloved..

..and revered Sri Siddeshwar Maharaj will fast unto death.

He will go on a hunger strike.

Glory to.. - Siddeshwar Maharaj

Today's the third day of Siddeshwar Maharaj's hunger strike.

Many religious organizations and devotees..

..from different parts of the country have supported this movement.

On the other hand, Kanji Lalji Mehta..

..has refused to talk to the media.

He won't take a sip of water.

He won't stop.

He's an ascetic.

Repeat after me, Glory to Ram, glory to Sita-Ram!

Hare Krishna! Hare Krishna!

Hare Krishna! Hare Krishna!

And what does God say?

Awaken the power of yöur devotion.

And go tell Kanji, yöu can do anything yöu want.

We will continue..

They're defaming me taking Krishna's name.

Mine too.

What have yöu got to do with this?

l do.

When they're defaming yöu, they're defaming me too.

Yöu're my friend after all.

Look, Kanji bhai, it's the era of publicity.

These imposters like to show off.

l am fighting for my right, that's all.

And yöu will win this fight only when yöu expose their lies..

..and that's possible only when yöu speak to the people.

Even Krishna had to enter the ring to kill Kans.

Enough of yöur fairytales.

But l did understand one thing.

Now watch... how l expose them and their God.

He's not going to spare me.

Hello, and welcome to a very special episode..

..of Oh My God!

Why is this episode special?

Because Kanji Lalji Mehta..

..is finally here to answer all yöur questions.

Many of yöu think he's crazy and cynical.

He's the person who... filed the case against God.

Kanji bhai, welcome to our show.

My first question is..

Why are yöu after all the religious sects?

Yöu media personnel, l tell yöu..

Yöur questions sound more like allegations..

..and make us sound guilty.

l respect all religion and don't believe in any.

This man will never change.

And if God exists, he will answer all my questions.

Notjust that, he will support me in my fight.

How?

When yöu were small, a small child.

What would yöu do to ask yöur papa for chocolate?

l mean, would yöu chant his name.

Papa, give me chocolates.

Or, did yöu venerate him with incense sticks..

..or throw flowers... - No, l didn't do any of that.

l would directly ask him whatever l wanted. - Exactly.

Exactly. l'm doing the same thing.

People have always told me, that God is like a father-figure.

Maybe? But how can l believe, as long as l don't see Him.

Yöu're an atheist, how can God appear before yöu?

Eat. Eat.

Kanji bhai, even l believe that God's like a father-figure. - Yes.

So, will he appear before me?

Do yöu believe in temples, idols etcetera?

Yes, l do. - Then He won't.

But why?

Because yöu're searching for Him in temples and idols.

Then why does He have to come personally?

No, this is wrong.

God does exist.

l couldn't find a decentjob for two years.

l prayed that if l find a job, l will shave my head.

And see, l found a job.

Oh, yöu shaved off the entire thing.

Just imagine.

Yöu're all dressed and leaving for work in the morning..

..and as soon as yöu open yöur door..

..yöu see a pile of hair.

Black hair, white hair, some with dandruff.

Some have lice.

There's a pile of every kind of hair.

Tell me how yöu will feel.

l won't like it at all.

lsn't it? So, imagine how bad God feels.

God opens his door, and there's hair scattered around.

Kanji bhai always has the right logic.

Do yöu know what's done with all these hairs?

They are sold.

These hairs are sold in America, London, etcetera...

ln short, yöur faith is sold.

That's it.

He is right.

He's got a point.

But that money is used to run schools, orphanages..

..hospitals, charitable trusts.

Do yöu have a problem with that too?

lt's just like a tobacco seller builds a cancer hospital.

They have to do these things, madam.

Because all this is unaccounted money.

lf yöu don't show any legal transaction..

..then the lncome Tax people will put yöu behind bars.

l've a problem with their way of extracting the money.

Just like the mafia scares us with a gun..

..these people scare us in the name of the Lord.

That's a good one.

Yöur child's stars are unfavourable.

He's unlucky.

There's an inauspicious issue in his horoscope.

Saturn's influencing his stars...

What is this?

He is just born, let him breathe.

And this is where all their religious hoaxes begin.

Notjust this lifetime, but they also scare yöu..

..in the name of yöur next life. Yes.

lf yöu don't do this and this..

..then yöu'll become a dog in yöur next lifetime.

Or, if yöu do this, yöu'll be born as a insect..

..and go to hell.

And then, they read out an entire itinerary of hell.

Yöu'll be made to sleep on a bed of nails.

Thrown in the sea of fire.

Fried in hot oil.

Am l a man or a fritter?

Wonderful, Kanji.

Too good.

So, what's the definition of religion according to yöu?

l believe, where there's religion..

..there's no place for honesty.

And where there's truth, yöu don't need religion.

He's absolutely right.

What's the role..

..of caste and religion in a person's life?

They do just one thing, madam.

Either it makes them helpless.

..or a terrorist.

He's too good.

He'll never change. - Sister.

Oh my God.

Oh my God, Kanji bhai.

Really, yöu've changed my concept about God.

Honestly.

No matter what the verdict of the court is..

..the yöung generation today, notjust the yöung..

..but every generation needs to think like yöu.

l applaud yöu.

Hey, guys. He's my father.

Sanskrit chants.

Sanskrit chants.

Just a minute, priest.

Explain us the meaning of these chants.

Priest, yöur fees is 500 rupees, right.

We will pay yöu that.

We'll pay yöu 5 rupees for every mantra yöu explain.

Let's go.

They've seen Kanji bhai's interview as well.

Let's go from here, come on. - Priest.

Someone placed a big stone in the middle of the ground.

And a few people anointed that stone and adorned it with garlands.

Now, people call this the temple of Hanuman..

..they tie bells here and pray.

This is the only ground. Where else can we play?

lf the BMC doesn't do anything..

..then we will talk to Kanji bhai.. - Yes, yes..

No, no. That man spares no one.

l will move this temple.

Hail Krishna.

Hail Krishna.

Hail Krishna.

Hail Krishna.

Hail Krishna.

Hail Krishna. - Miracle.

Swami. - Yes.

Relieve me from this hunger-strike.

Each time l've to go to the toilet for eating the fritter.

Manage a few more days..

..otherwise yöu'll have to starve for the rest of yöur life.

Yöu've rented such a big ground.

But now nobody comes here.

The few that are here..

..are the ones who rented this dais to us.

l fear that if people start believing in Kanji..

..then they will lose their faith in us.

What if they stop coming to the temple?

That won't happen.

ln this country, people visit the temple..

..more than they visit the school.

The High Court has accepted 455 cases..

..but we'll have to wait and watch..

..Kanji Lalji Mehta's argument in the court.

Siddeshwar Maharaj.

What's the area of yöur temple?

22 acres.

lt has 322 small temples of God.

Meaning, there's an entire shopping mall of Gods inside.

Silence.

There are 142 priests to serve the Lord in all these temples.

Do yöu know how many beggars are outside yöur temple?

What? - Beggars.

Yöu remember the 320 idols and 142 priests..

..but yöu do yöu know how many beggars sit outside yöur temple?

Yöur Honour, the beggars outside their temple..

..are restricted from coming inside. No!

Whether its scorching heat, or rains, just keep rotting outside.

Don't set foot inside.

Don't say no.

A priest from yöur temple told me so.

And he also said to me..

..Kanji bhai, if yöu want to win this case..

..then come here every Monday.

So l asked Where should l come.

He said, Come to Lord Shiva's temple.

Offer a bowl of milk and then watch.

l thought, fine, let's try it.

Yöur Honour, l went there on a Monday..

..with a bowl of milk, standing in the long queue.

Everyone was holding bowl in their hands.

l thought there must be someone inside to drink the milk.

All of them aren't fools to stand in the line holding a jug.

lt was my turn, Yöur Honour.

l went inside, but there was no in there.

No one to drink the milk?

Just then l noticed black stone.

lt's called 'Shiva's phallus, yöu fool.

Yes, there was a 'Shiva's phallus.

And that stone.

That stone was completely immersed in milk.

And right besides the phallus, through a small drain..

..the milk was going outside.

l thought Yes, there must be someone outside to drink the milk.

But when l saw there was no one outside as well.

All the milk was going into the sewers.

The sewers.

Total waste.

And there was a beggar standing right besides the sewer.

He must've been hungry for the past 4-5 days.

He was shivering.

Maybe he wanted to drink the milk..

..but he couldn't do so from the sewers.

l gave that beggar my bowl of milk.

And do yöu know what he said after he drank the milk?

God bless yöu!

lf every person visiting the temple..

..gives the milk to a needy instead..

..then they will earn more merits.

Right?

lf yöu donate blankets to a poor beggar..

..instead of offering it to shrine, it will make Allah happy.

And if yöu light a candle in some poor man's hut..

..instead of the church, they he'll never have to live in the darkness.

Don't yöu believe in God? - l am God.

And l am Amitabh Bachchan!

Look, Kanji.

Offering milk, candles, blanket is a tradition.

Worshipping the Lord.

But yöu won't understand their value..

..because yöu are an atheist.

Yöu're still bounded by the illusions of this world.

But yöu aren't.

Yöu're at the threshold of salvation.

So, why not stop the shams under the pretext of rituals and traditions?

Do yöu know how much oil is wasted on Saturday..

..on Lord Shani's idol?

People stick coins on the idol like this.

What will Hanuman do with all that change?

Kanji is absolutely right.

Sai Baba lived in poverty all his life, for the poor.

As long as he was alive..

..he wandered around for a drop of oil.

And today, after he's dead.

Throne worth millions.

Gold crown. What for?

Tell me one thing.

Anyone who is a faithful devotee of the Lord..

..is blessed with His grace.

Right?

Right? - Yes.

So tell me, why does a bus heading..

..for a trip to Amarnath or Vaishno Devi falls in the ravine?

They were going to serve the Lord.

They were going with complete faith and singing religious discourses.

So, the Lord called them directly.

And show me one car which met with an accident..

..and doesn't have God's idol or photo kept inside.

Speak. - l object, Yöur Honour.

From day 1 this man's trying to twist the case around.

Mr. Kanji, this isn't a debate about good and bad.

This is the court, we only believe on proofs here.

And we have proof, yöur signatures on the insurance papers.

And legally yöu have no right to ask for any compensation..

..from the insurance company.

And as far as we're concerned.

We don't believe in the insurance company's conditions.

lf they say that the judge caused the earthquake..

..will the judge have to pay yöu compensation?

Similarly, if God's name is written on the policy..

..he isn't liable to pay the compensation.

lf yöu want God to give yöu compensation.

Then prove that God caused this earthquake.

He did.. - But, in writing.

Do yöu have it...in writing?

Do yöu have it? Any proof?

Yöur Honour.. - Mr. Kanji, the court of law..

..cannot give a verdict on just arguments alone.

Yöur arguments maybe valid for the common people..

..but if yöu cannot prove them, it has no value.

Do yöu have any proof?

No. - ln that case, the court gives yöu a month's time..

..which is yöur last chance.

On the next hearing, if yöu cannot produce any evidence..

..then l'm afraid yöu will have to rest yöur case and all others.

Court is adjourned for the day.

Relax.

Next time l see yöu in this courtroom..

..l will sue yöu for defamation, and yöu'll lose..

..whatever yöu have left.

Relax.

What will yöu do now? How will yöu prove it in the court now?

Because yöu're not alone, Mr. Kanji.

lt's a matter of crores of rupees.

Many people have hopes with yöu.

Sir, how will yöu get a proof in writing? - Sir, what about these people now?

Yöu aren't playing yöur flute today.

Yöu don't like it, so l'm sitting quietly.

l like it. Yöu play it well too.

Thank yöu.

Yöu look worried. - Yes.

The court says get us proof, and in writing.

How do l get proof?

There's a consultant sitting right next to yöu, ask me.

This isn't some housing loan issue.

lt's a court case.

lt's a big problem.

l've a suggestion.

Give me the alcohol.

Yöu drink this milk.

Yöu want me to mix them.

No, no, just drink the milk.

And l will give yöu the solution.

Yöu know, Kanji, where's the solution..

..to all the problems, tensions and trouble written?

Where? - ln this book.

'Shrimad Bhagvad Gita.'

Have yöur read it? - Who can possibly read it?

lt's such a thick book.

And not a single photograph.

How can anyone read it, it's not interesting at all.

l used to keep it in my shop.

But it would fetch a small margin.

Plus it catches termites.

lt causes problems. So l threw it out.

Threw it? - Yes, l threw it.

Yöu threw the Bhagwad Gita out. - Yes.

Wow! - Why?

Kanji, the Gita, Bible, Koran has answers..

..to every problems of humans.

l know yöu don't believe in all this.

But for yöur own good, read this book once.

And see the result.

And if the result isn't good..

..then yöu can throw it out.

Kanji bhai read it once, and then see.

♫ l am not human. ♪

♫ l am sold in stores. ♪

♫ l created the world. ♪

♫ Not with mud, but with my emotions. ♪

♫ l am wandering around.. ♪

♫ .looking for my signs, where are they. ♪

♫ Where are my signs? ♪

Stop begging in the name of Allah.

Stop begging and do some hard work.

♫ My signs. ♪

♫ My signs. ♪

♫ l was always with yöu as yöur shadow. ♪

♫ l gave yöu shade when the heat was strong. ♪

♫ l was yöur companion in yöurjourney. ♪

♫ Still yöu're confused. ♪

♫ Looking for yöur answers in the question. ♪

♫ Where are yöu lost? ♪

♫ Where are my signs? ♪

♫ Where are my signs? ♪

♫ My signs. ♪

♫ My signs. ♪

♫ My signs. ♪

♫ My signs. ♪

♫ My signs. ♪

Wear yöur slippers. - Oh.

Thief.

Those are my slippers.

♫ Where are my signs? ♪

Sir, shoe polish. - No.

Sir, recognise me. The beggar outside the shrine.

Yöu told me to make an honest living.

Shake hands, shake hands.

♫ My signs. ♪

♫ My signs. ♪

Today's the last hearing on the case filed against God.

The claim amount is 400 crore rupees.

Can Kanji bhai win this case?

We'll have to wait and watch.

Yöu can please proceed.

Yöur Honour, before Mr. Kanji can express..

..his sharp and witty views before the court..

..without any reference, l would like to ask..

..does he have any evidence, to prove..

..that God has demolished his shop?

Yöur Honour, l require a learned man..

..for the next question l'm going to ask.

So, whoever amongst yöu is the learned one can come here.

The learned one, please come here.

Please sit down.

Good. Yöu come here, Swami.

Come.

Yöu sages always speak about the scriptures..

..in their preaching.

ls everything written in the scriptures true?

Absolutely.

lt's not written anywhere, yöu're saying that.

lt's written in the Gita.

lt is. What's written in the Gita?

Chapter four, verse forty of Gita.

Sanskrit chants.

Sanskrit chants.

Meaning? - lt means..

Any illiterate, or faithless person that doubts the Gita..

..is destined to ruination.

He stays devoid of sanctity on earth and on heaven.

Understood?

He's an interesting character.

Do yöu understand anything written in The Gita or the Scriptures?

Or are yöu blindly agreeing..

..to whatever Leeladhar is saying.

Yöur Honour, small children in school..

..don't remember the entire prayer.

So they just close their eyes and...

Move their lips.

They move their lips and yöu're moving yöur hands.

Kanji.

Yöu've insulted a learned sage.

So? - Yöu won't get refuge even in hell.

How can l?

Yöu've already reserved places there.

How dare yöu?

How dare yöu?

Atheist!

Silence. - Leave me! Leave me!

What are yöu doing?

This is the court, sit down.

Order, order.

Sit down everyone.

Sanskrit chants.

Sanskrit chants.

Sanskrit chants.

Sanskrit chants.

Chapter 2, verse 56.

Meaning, a person for whom happiness and sorrows is equal..

..and is devoid of anger and fear, and has a calm mind..

..is called a learned person.

They'll teach me Gita?

They can't teach me, Yöur Honour.

Their lQ is lower than the room temperature.

l said a few things to instigate yöu..

..yöu tried to harm me.

ls this yöur achievement, Siddeshwar?

Mr. Kanji, the issue isn't his achievement..

..the issue here is who razed down yöur shop?

God did.

Yöu're giving a verdict. That's the judge's duty.

Yöu just have to prove..

..that God caused that earthquake.

Yes, and it's impossible to prove that.

Relax, relax, relax.

Nothing is impossible.

Tell me one thing.

The Lord has narrated the 'Bhagvad Gita'. - Yes.

And everything said in the 'Bhagvad Gita' is true.

Absolutely.

Point to be noted, Yöur Honour.

So tell me, why did God say in the eight verse of the ninth chapter..

..of the 'Gita', l've created the entire universe..

..and it will be destroyed on my will.

The entire creation follows my will.

lt is only l, who is responsible..

..for its creation and its destruction.

And look.

Yöur Honour, it's been said in the Bible as well.

Chapter 54, verse 16.

See, it is l who have created the smith..

..who blows the fire of coals and produces a weapon..

..fit for his purpose.

l've also created the ravager to destroy.

And see this.

Also in the Holy Quran.

Sur-e-Zalzala 99, verse 108 states that..

..the entire earth will be shaken to its core.

And the earth will spill out its burden.

And humans will question, what's happening.

And that day, she will unveil her plight.

Because the Lord would've ordered her to do so.

The Lord.

All these things mean the same thing..

..that my shop was razed down..

..due to the earthquake caused by God.

That means it is an act of God.

lt's His doing.

And, all those who have suffered losses..

..due to Him, will have to be compensated by God.

Otherwise, their collection agents.

Yöur Honour, Mr. Kanji is trying to confuse Leeladhar..

..with his words.

Mr. Sardesai.

What are yöu doing? Let him speak.

lf it's proven that God exists..

..then we won't have to pay.

l see.

Now yöu want to blame us completely. - Be quiet.

Yöu cannot blame the Lord to hide yöur sins. - Be quiet.

Because only we have a copyright on God.

Copyright? - Silence.

Just because yöu constructed a few temples..

..yöu think God belongs to yöu..

Beware.

Our community won't spare yöu.

What's he.. - Silence!

Relax.

Until today l had heard that God is venerated..

..He is worshipped, prayed to.

But now l see that Gods have copyrights too.

God's copyright?

These people have turned God into a brand.

Now l am assured that God doesn't exist.

Not possible.

Because if He really existed..

..he would've rid the world of imposters like yöu.

l've already proven what l wanted to, Yöur Honour.

Now the verdict..

Mr. Kanji, are yöu alright?

Mr. kanji, are yöu alright?

Mr. Kanji.

Kanji bhai! Kanji bhai!

Kanji bhai! Kanji bhai!

What's wrong with my brother?

Someone get water.

Kanji bhai! Kanji bhai!

Thank yöu. - Call the ambulance.

Call the ambulance.

Yes, he's here.

Excuse me. - Just a minute, just a minute.

Let me through. - Please let us pass.

Yöu cannot go inside. - No, no, no.

Please, l said yöu cannot.. - But he's my husband.

l want to see him.

Doctor, is he alright?

lt's a severe attack of paralysis.

And now he's gone into coma.

He's on ventilator and..

..only God can save him now.

The 400 crore in compensations under the 'Act of God'..

..will now be paid out.

lt was his wish that we should pay, so we did.

Great, Lord.

Where am l?

Don't say that.

Yöu're in the lCU.

Yöur wife and children are outside.

No one's allowed inside.

Then how did yöu come in?

l came here to wake yöu up.

lt's time for yöu to get up.

Yöu cussed God from yöur heart.

And where's the heart?

On yöur left.

So God has paralysed yöur entire left side.

l am not saying this..

..it's the media outside spreading this rumour.

l can cure yöu if yöu want.

So, yöu're a doctor now.

l am all in one.

Want to see a miracle.

Soaring around on the bike isn't called miracle.

l see.

Here we go.

Krishna Vasudev Yadav, from Gokul.

Do yöu believe now?

♫ Yöu're my mother, and my father. ♪

♫ Yöu're my friend, and my companion. ♪

l've donned the same form yöu always see..

..on televisions, calendars, movies.

l've been seen in this form for ages.

And l'm standing before yöu in that same form.

But Kanji bhai, l'm not like that.

Yöu really..

Forgive me, forgive me.

Just like a devotee is incomplete without his God..

..similarly, God is incomplete without his true devotee.

Why didn't yöu show me this miracle before?

That's the problem.

Friend.

l am Krishna, that's why l perform miracles.

l'm not Krishna, because l perform miracles.

That means yöu're real.

God exists.

And God isn't my father-figure, he's my friend.

l am everyone's friend, but no one understands me one.

People gave yöu a high position.

And yöu staggered.

Yes, but l am not like people think of me.

l've common sense too.

l am not interested in people's offerings.

l want them to distribute all this to the poor.

All l care about is their faith, their love, their belief.

Just a minute.

Belief?

But l never believed in Yöu.

l was an atheist.

Why did Yöu show yöurself to only me?

Kanji bhai, sit down.

Do yöu know what atheist means?

Someone who examines, thinks, understands..

..and says that this is wrong.

The Lord doesn't exist.

He's an atheist.

That's why l appeared before yöu.

Because yöu did everything a true atheist does.

And a true atheist can become a real believer.

People come to me for their own self-interest.

They come with different exchange offers.

Exchange offer?

Lord, if l pass my SSC exams..

..l will walk to Siddhivinayak for 5 Tuesdays.

lf Dominic's agrees to marry me..

..l will light 1 1 candles at Mt. Mary.

lf my wife gets pregnant..

..then l will come and offer a blanket at yöur shrine.

Different offers.

And those who can't blame me for it.

They say, we couldn't go there..

..because the Lord didn't call us.

The Lord didn't call?

Do they need a invitation card.. - Yes.

Do yöu want me to write yöu an invitation card?

Don't l have anything better to do?

And anyway, Kanji bhai, l am present in every element.

l am omnipresent.

lf yöu're present everywhere..

..why have they built temples?

l've my own house.

l don't want to live inside those four walls.

Then? Why did yöu create such a religion?

l only created humans.

And humans started religion, caste.

And it's been going on for years now..

..because yöu need it.

But one should discard such a religion.

Never snatch the religion from the people.

lf yöu take them away, they will make yöu their religion.

Yöu don't believe it, do yöu?

Yöu've been in coma for a month.

Let me show yöu what has happened..

..in the past one month.

Look.

Kanji Prabhu paid me a visit in my dreams yesterday.

And he said he's the 1 1th Avatar of Lord Vishnu.

What's going on?

Kanji Prabhu appeared in his four-armed form.

Holding the mace, the conch..

People all around the world..

..are seeing signs of Kanji's Godly form.

l was on night duty.

Ajust closed my eyes.

And someone slapped me.

And that's when l heard a voice, No sleeping on duty.

Circulate a few miraculous stories of Kanji in the market..

..and people will spread it like wildfire.

l had seen Kanji Prabhu flying with his scooter.

He appeared suddenly.

10 feet, 15 feet, 20 feet.

Brother Kanji is God.

He is God.

The 'dharma gurus' have accepted Kanji bhai's Kalki avatar..

..asked for an apology and have decided..

..to pay the claims worth 400 crore.

lt was His will that we should pay, so we did.

But why are yöu making him God?

Who told yöu that he is God?

Do yöu know...when yöu will die?

Do yöu? - No.

l don't know either.

But he has decided his death day.

On 16th December as soon as we switch off the ventilator..

..Kanji's story will be over.

But this time we've incurred heavy losses.

400 crores in insurance claims.

One crore to the doctor.

And the expense to construct the temple.

lt's a onetime investment, Mr. Mishra.

We'll recover it in a year.

And anyway, we haven't had a new God for a long time now.

♫ Hail Lord Kanji Wala. ♪

♫ Hail Lord Kanji Wala. ♪

♫ Om Lord Kanji Wala. ♪

♫ Sugar's high, feeling breathless too. ♪

♫ Cure my swine flu. - Cure my swine flu. ♪

l am going. - Mahadev, wait.

Where are yöu going so hastily?

Forsake yöur anger.

The bed besides Kanji bhai is empty.

Do yöu want me to reserve that for yöu?

He will forsake his body on his birthday.

His shrine will be built right where his shop was.

That isn't all. Now watch this.

All arrangements to transport Kanji bhai's tomb has been made.

Yöu snatched their business..

..and they made yöu their business.

Yes.

Kanji bhai, they've made an estimate..

..to earn 450 crores from yöur temple.

Yöu're God, yöu should've stopped them.

Friend, l would've ended the battle of Mahabharat in a second..

..if l had picked up the weapon.

But that isn't my job.

My job is to show people right and wrong.

This is yöur temple, yöur battle.

Yöu decide what yöu should do.

Fight if yöu want to, or stay quiet.

Save him, please doctor.

We cannot do anything now.

And anyway, it's his last wish.

He is God.

Just a minute.

Wait here, we'll bring the dead body out.

Donate as much as yöu wish in the donation box kept in front of Kanji Prabhu..

..and have yöur wishes fulfilled.

The rate for VlP line is Rs. 101 .

Welcome, welcome, Mahadev.

Swami, our very own Mahadeveshwar.

This is called destiny.

Kanji's chapter's going to end right where it started.

Kanji bhai's body has gone missing from the hospital.

The hospital administration has no explanation.

Offerings made in clarified butter, only Rs.25.

Where did Kanji disappear to?

Call Mr. Mishra.

There he is.

He isn't Spiderman. Find him.

l just found out. Don't worry.

l am there. l'll do something.

Kanji Prabhu's dead body can arrive in the truck anytime now. - Go on.

Everyone please keep calm, everyone will get a chance to behold him.

photographs of Sri Kanji Prabhu.

Kanji Prabhu's autobiography.

Yöu are a fool.

l gave orders and yöu set out to look for Kanji.

Who do yöu think he is?

Let's get out of here quietly, otherwise..

..the people won't spare us.

Come on.

Kanji is alive.

Yes, l am alive.

What are yöu staring at?

l am the same Kanji whom yöu've turned into God.

l don't know whether yöu're great or fool.

l kept telling yöu don't turn religion into business..

..yöu made him God and started yöur business.

Tell me one thing.

The world's so beautiful, why should God live only in temples?

l say, have faith in Him.

Believe in Him from yöur heart and yöu will find God.

Try to find God in humans, and yöu will find Him.

Yöu will find Him in humans.

Not in these stones.

Not in these...stones.

They played with our emotions.

We won't spare them!

We won't spare them!

They spread the rumour of yöur death as well.

They are the imposters.

Listen.

Yöu kill two and there are two hundred more.

Don't yöu see it on television everyday?

Their real punishment is..

..let them leave respectfully.

Let them leave in their expensive cars.

And no one will set foot in their temples or hermitages.

Get that.

That will be their real punishment.

Please leave.

Faith and belief, are very addictive, Kanji.

Once yöu're addicted to it, yöu cannot let go easily.

All the people that yöu see here..

..they are not God-loving people, they are God-fearing.

Sooner or later, yöu might see them in hermitages again.

Be fearless!

So...won't yöu go along?

Come on, break the idol.

Papa. - Where? Where is he?

l want yöu to promise that no one will ever drop a penny..

..at any of the religious places.

What are yöu staring at?

Break the statue.

Here, come here. - Come, l'll introduce yöu to Krishna.

What? - Come that way.

Look, Kanji bhai, they're felling the statue.

lt's exactly like yöu wanted.

Look..

Who are yöu looking for, Kanji?

Didn't l say l am present everywhere?

l am pouring on fields as the rain.

And making nests along with the birds.

l am also taking lunch with the ants down there.

Are yöu fine? - Papa.

Yes, l am fine.

Whom did yöu want us to introduce to?

No one.

No one.

What are yöu doing, Kanji?

Don't wear this around yöur neck as a talisman.

Yöu finally succeeded in explaining people..

..that this is wrong.

Throw it.

Throw it away.

"Hope You've Liked & Enjoyed The Movie"