Original subtitles

[silence]

[conductor] This is Paulina.

[warning bell]

Doors closing.

Southport is next.

Doors open on the right at Southport.

Please keep the belongings on the seat next to you so that others can sit down.

You know, uh, I got a job last week.

You know, last Wednesday.

You know...and uh...

It ain't nothing big, just sweeping floors, you know, sweeping and mopping floors.

I get $8.50 an hour.

You see, when I was out doing my thing.

I couldn't even find a job like that.

But, you know, the reason I'm here,

so I went to go... and... celebrate, you know, me getting a job.

I got out with a chick, you know.

She got some coke, you know, and...

I had to put it out, you know.

I just realized just how close I was.

Yeah, that's it, man.

[man] Well done.

Um...

-Hi, I'm Mercy. -[all] Hi, Mercy.

And I've been sober 33 days.

And...

Yeah. The program is working...

and that's all I got to say.

[man] Welcome to that.

[man] Hi, I'm Gilbert.

It's your turn.

This one?

All right.

Um...

You took it?

Now, which one?

This one?

You won again.

[silence]

[subway announcer] This is Sedgwick.

[warning bell]

[subway announcer] This is Southport.

[train announcer] Doors closing.

[background chatter]

-[woman 1] I can't do it. -[woman 2] I can't do it either.

-I can do a cock crowing. -Oh, yeah?

[imitating cock crowing]

[chatter]

-Mom? -[woman] Oh! What?

-Hi, Mercy. -Hello.

-Hi Mercy. -Hi.

Oh, your mom's in the kitchen.

[woman] Did you say hi to your aunt Mercy? Did you say hi?

[woman] She looked like, you know, 25. And, what's with this daughter's thing?

-[Mom] Horrible, horrible. -I know, it's only--

-Hi, Mercy, how are you? -Good.

-Honey, take this out to the table.

-Sure. -Okay.

-[child] Hi. -[Mercy] Hi.

[woman] ...when you try and all of sudden it's perfect.

-He's so cute. -[woman laughing]

[woman] You know, I sometimes wonder what kind of world

we're leaving to these children.

These things like this gay marriage.

-You know, this [indistinct]. -No sense of God today.

Absolutely. I just can't believe what's happening.

Are they coming to-- do they think that our church is going to embrace them?

And our pastors would be involved with things like this?

I think-- [overlapping conversations]

Um, Danny? Would you get the door, please?

Are we expecting somebody?

[overlapping chatter]

[woman] I really want to go to, you know, Istanbul, Turkey, a lot.

There I've always wanted to go.

[indistinct]

-Mmm. -[man] Sorry, I'm late.

-Hello, thanks for coming. -Hey.

This is Mark, everyone.

Honey, would you move down?

Could you get a chair, thank you.

[Mom] Remember Mark?

[all] Yeah, hi.

So, how are you?

-I'm doing great. -We've got tons of food.

So, be sure to help yourself.

-You hungry? -Yeah, absolutely, thanks.

So this is an empty chair.

Good, good, nice and cozy.

-[Mercy] Hi, Markus. -[woman] Why'd she be with your uncle?

-[woman] It's too boring up there. -[Henry] Thanks.

Nice young man, brings a bottle with him.

-So, how have you been? -Oh, I've been good, yeah, yeah, great.

-What are you up to these days? -Working. I work at the Capitol Hill still.

[indistinct chatter]

[Henry] How long have you been there?

Oh, two years.

-It's been a long time, it's good to see you. -You too.

How have you guys been?

-[woman] Taking it easy. I don't know. -[Henry] We're still kicking.

[Henry] So, what've you been up to?

They used to date

when they used to work together.

-...been working on that scheme. -Oh, sure.

[Henry] You've been for a while on that machine.

Yeah, it's been a couple of years.

[chattering]

I'm sorry. I thought your mom would have told you I was coming.

It's fine.

So, how are you?

Good.

How are you?

Fine.

Still work at the airport?

No. I got fired.

You're better off.

You didn't seem to like it?

-It's good to see you. -Yeah, it's good to see you too.

[train rumbling]

[background noises]

[sighs]

Hey.

Hey.

Sorry.

-What? -I know this is kind of

random or whatever, but, um, where did you get that scarf?

Oh, um, I actually just found this.

-You did? -Yeah.

Yeah, I see.

-So, you heading home? -Yeah.

Actually, this is, uh, my bike. I'm about to, uh, head out.

Hum.

Can I walk with you a little bit?

I mean, yes. If you want to?

I just... It's kind of a walk, but if you want to walk with me?

Sure. Yeah, I'd love to.

-Okay. Um, I'm Jesse by the way. -Sorry, I'm Mercy.

-Oh, nice to meet you. -Nice to meet you.

Um... Okay.

-So, how was your night? -Was okay.

[Jesse] It's going, uh...? It's good.

-How about yours? -Yeah.

-[Mercy] It's good. My first time there. -Yeah, I haven't noticed you here before.

It's over here.

So, where are you from again?

Michigan.

-Michigan. Hmm. -Yeah. Exciting.

What brought you here, then?

Um... School, actually.

Oh, okay. Yeah. Um...

I'm gonna be in RN, but...

I'm just taking the basics right now, so I don't... I don't know.

So, why do you wanna, like... What got you into... that profession?

Like, why do you wanna study it?

-I don't know. I really wanna help people. -Um-hum.

-I know that sounds cliché, but... -No, it doesn't.

I think that's sweet.

It's super sweet.

-Are you from here? -Yeah, I'm from Chicago.

-Really? -Born and raised.

-Do you go to school? -No, I don't.

So, you never thought about going to school at all?

Uh, no.

Not really. I don't know what I would go for.

Maybe I'd study literature or something.

But, yeah, no, it's not for me.

I get that.

-I think it's your turn. -Oh!

Been so spaced out, okay.

You're doing great. You're beating me.

I'm just hustling you.

-Is that so? -Um-hum.

So, what do you want me to be?

-Wait, is that mine? -Yeah.

Oh, we ain't done it either. That means I have to change it.

Can you take back my answer?

All right. No, okay. Um...

I wanted to be... Okay, can I do a color, a number, or suit?

-Okay, I'm going to choose... -Um...

You can do a suit.

-Not any color or number. This is it. -Okay, um... heart.

-A heart? Alright. -Yeah.

-Here's my heart. -Here's my heart. I'm topping to your heart.

-I'm glad you asked me out. -Me too.

I didn't think you'd say yes.

-Why? -I'm glad you did.

I didn't think you'd be...

interested, I guess.

-I'm interested. -Okay.

-Hey. -Hey, hey.

-Surprise. -Good to see you.

Well, I know you got done with class, so, I don't know,

I was thinking, do you wanna go get some ice cream or something?

-Yeah. That'll be great. -Yeah? Okay. Cool.

-Um, can I drop off my bag and stuff? -No.

Okay, cool.

-How are you? -I'm good.

-How are you? -Good. Good.

[Mercy] How was your class?

Argh... It was... it's alright, actually.

It wasn't bad.

[Jesse] What have you been doing today?

[Mercy] Waiting for you.

Wow. You must have been waiting a very long time.

-That class was forever. -Yeah.

-Sit down over there? -Cool.

-This is delicious. -Yeah.

My parents used to take me here all the time.

We'd go through the drive-through and, uh...

the lady always gave my dog a small vanilla cone.

-Awesome. -Yeah. He loved it.

I always got, uh... a Dilly Bar.

A what bar?

A Dilly Bar. Like...

The chocolate with the vanilla inside on a stick.

-You made that up. -No.

I've never heard of it.

It's a thing. It's like, the cheapest thing on the menu.

So, are you close with your family?

Yeah.

Yeah, we've always been pretty close.

I mean, yeah, my parents are basically like...

friends now, which is nice.

That's good.

-What do you have, like, sisters or brothers? -Yeah.

I've got two sisters.

-Oh, man. I bet you guys were fighting for that bathroom. -Yeah.

-Clothes... -Yeah.

And clothes.

-Each other's approval for everything. -Yeah.

Basically, I'm closer with my youngest sister. I'm the middle child.

Ah.

The middle child is always so well-rounded.

[Jesse giggles]

[Jesse] Thank you for saying that.

What about you? Are you close with your family?

Hmm...

Well, I'm an only child.

But... I'm close with my dad.

I don't see him very much, but yeah.

He's like the one person in my family I could talk to.

Nice. It's always good to have.

Yeah. I feel lucky for that.

So, I wanna show you something.

It's a bit of an adventure.

-Okay. -Yeah, so, are you up for it?

-Right now? -Yeah.

-Okay, sure. Okay. -You have to come with me.

[lapping waves]

Wow. This is amazing.

I thought you'd like it.

You've never been down here?

No. Never.

So, have you been to a Cubs game yet?

No, I've been meaning too, though. I haven't gotten a chance.

It's on my list to do.

I'll take you.

Okay.

-So, that right there, is the Sears Tower. -Wow. Right.

-All right. It's actually called The Willis Tower now. -Oh, yeah. That's...

And then right there you can see the Pier go all the way across.

Then there's the Fairy store.

-Have you ever been in there? -I haven't.

Oh, and then, there's my building that I own.

All right. I own the Trump building, so.

-Really? -Oh, yeah, yeah.

High maintenance, but worth it.

But my building is gonna battle your building.

-Oh, yeah? -Yeah.

I'm going to put cannons on top of my building

and shoot spaghetti at yours.

Oh, well, I will put cannons on top of mine and shoot meatballs.

Wonderful.

Yeah, it's nice.

It's beautiful.

[traffic noise]

-[Dad] Hey, what's going on? -[Mercy] Come here.

What are you doing out here?

Just gonna visit my pops.

-You got-- -Sorry, ah?

-You got time for a break? -A break?

-Yeah. -Yeah, I got all day for a break I wish.

-Sure, sure. -All right.

-[Dad] You know, let's just go to the car. How about that? -Okay.

You didn't go to the wedding?

Yeah, I guess. I don't know.

Here goes a bunch of drama.

I just want to stay out of it, man.

She calls me up at, like, you know, three in the morning, bitching about this and that.

-Yeah. -Why you're talking to me?

-How's your mom? -Mom... well, she is herself.

Yeah. Her good old self.

-It's good to hear. -Yeah, I guess her and Henry are talking about having a baby.

-Come on. -Yeah.

-No way. -He's such a prick, dude.

-Are you kidding me? -Yeah. No, they want to adopt.

Wait a minute, what?

They're talking about adopting a baby.

-It's fucked up. -Yes.

Jesus Christ.

I couldn't get her to talk to you or be with you or...

take care of you or...

-So what? -Well, she's involved in all these church programs.

-You know that, right? -Yeah, of course, she is.

-Yeah. -Ms. Fucking Holy Roller.

-Here. -I'm good.

Cures all ails past, present and future.

Ah.

So, how's work?

[exhaling] How's work?

There's no money in it. I'll tell you that much.

I may not have this car much longer.

Back to a beater.

Listen, enough about me, enough about your mom.

What do you know? Come on. What's going on?

What? Oh, boy.

-This is big. -Yeah.

It's not that big. I, I don't know.

Uh, yeah, it's... I met somebody.

-Ah, that's great, okay. -Yeah.

All right. What's he do?

-Nothing? -No, no. Uh, Well...

Not a bum, is he?

-No. -I mean...

Um...

Oh my god.

She's an RN.

She's an RN.

Yup. Well, she's studying to be an RN.

-Yeah, she's going to be an RN. -She's going to be an RN.

Yeah, she wants to work with kids. Um-hum.

-Kids? -Yeah.

Okay. Well, that's good.

Um-hum.

-Yeah, no, she's-- -She's in school?

Yeah, finishing school.

-Finishing school. -Um-hum.

[dad sighs]

Ever think going back to school?

I think about it, but I can't afford it.

Yeah... Well...

-I'd better be getting back in there. -Okay, yeah. Definitely.

-You know, I gotta go or he gets pissed off... Sometimes. -Yeah.

Chew my ass up.

Ah. Not something I enjoy.

-Yeah. -Take care of yourself, all right?

Look, you can come by more often and everything, all right?

Come by the house, whatever. Just give me a call.

Okay. I will.

Oh, shit.

I will, old man.

Yeah, that's me.

I am the oldest man.

You are the oldest man.

Fucking oldest guy.

Fuck.

[whistling]

[sighs]

So...

Got yourself in a pick, uh?

Yeah, I just need a little help right now.

Yeah, I'm looking for work, but it just is coming slow.

Ah, oh I see.

I just need a little cash.

I'll pay you back.

Pay me back?

Eh, you know your mom won't loan you money

because you're so good at paying back.

What do you spend your money on, Mercy?

Who do you spend it on?

I'm trying to pay rent right now.

I am trying to get my life on track.

I just need a little bit of cash to help me right now, that's it.

Henry, I, uhm, respect you so much,

and I am really thankful that you're not telling my mom about this.

I'd be really thankful if you could just help me out this time.

I see that you need my help, I really do.

And I am willing to help you.

Just say, please, and I will give you the money.

Please.

Please what?

Please, Henry, will you help me?

[sighs]

[clears throat]

All right, here you go.

Thank you.

Hey.

Hey.

What are you doing here?

Just wanted to see you.

You're really drunk.

I'm sorry.

Are you okay?

Yeah, I just wanted to talk to you.

Okay.

Let's... Let me help you up.

Let's go inside.

-I'm sorry. -Are you sure you are okay?

Yeah.

Stay here.

-Thanks. -All right.

So, what's been going on?

I'm sorry if I upset you.

It just-- it's been, like, my strangest day, and...

I keep thinking about you.

I wanted to see you.

Do you want to talk about it?

It's just, I'm having a hard time.

Does it have to do with your family and everything?

Yeah, somewhat.

I saw my dad today.

And...

I told him I met somebody.

-You did? -Yeah.

What did he say?

Hmm...

Not much.

I think he knew already

that, you know, everything.

We've never had like an open discussion about it.

-It's hard. -Hum.

So, does your family know about you?

-That I am gay? -Yeah.

Yeah.

Um.

Yeah.

Um.

It wasn't easy at the beginning.

But eventually... they accepted it.

I don't know, we're just, um,

their perception of you changes,

so, you have to give them time to adjust.

-It's weird. -Yeah.

But, it's fine, it's fine now.

Yeah, I really wish I could tell my mom.

I'm not sure I'd do well with it, so...

I'm just like...

I feel like she would be happier if she didn't know.

It sucks.

I'm sorry.

So, how was your day?

[laughs]

Besides dealing with this drunken mess?

I like this drunken mess.

It's fine. It's just...

I had class again today and my professor's

keeps adding a bunch of curriculum to our midterm.

And so, it's just been really stressful because no one knows what's going on.

He won't answer any questions or anything like that.

He just expects us to, like, understand everything he gives us.

It's just stressful.

And I can't wait for it to be over.

I just want to get done with all my basics, as quick as possible.

-I think I'm gonna get in the water. -Okay.

-Will you come with me? -No, you go ahead.

-Are you sure? -Yeah, I'm good.

Okay.

[mouthing] Come on.

[kids playing]

[both screaming]

[indistinct talking]

It's too shallow to [indistinct]

-Oh. Is this a turtle? -Yeah.

I don't know, yes.

[indistinct]

[background chatter]

[woman 1] I should tell him he should smile.

[woman 2] You should...

You should have.

[overlapping speech]

[man] Just a little, uh, phone updating to

you should smile in one of your pictures, amateurs.

It's also great because I know you have pictures

of him smiling but you obviously are not.

-[woman] What's he gonna say? -[man] What's he gonna say?

[woman] Ah, slim gym.

And also, you would probably choose steak as well.

I would abs--- I would not choose Billy Joel.

Who would you rather Billy Joel or Mr. Bean? [laughing]

Oh, God.

Mr. Bean is so clumsy.

I think I'd have to choose--

At least Billy has talents.

I can't nail down the talent that Mr. Bean has.

I would never sleep with Mr. Bean.

It was incredible.

He was so drunk, there were so many people.

Most of his Facebook friends that he never met,

never knew, but they were crazy.

They were crazy.

Oh, we had so much fun.

We had such a good time, such a good time.

[gate slams]

Oh, hey!

How are you doing?

I'm good. How are you?

-This is, uh, Mercy. -Mercy, I'm Anne.

-Nice to meet you. -Nice to meet you, Mercy.

-How have you been? -I've been good, yeah.

Just, uh, rising up the summer.

Yeah, oh, that's so nice, I miss summers off.

I'm just working and yeah, whatever.

You guys should get some food and drinks,

there's plenty over there so help yourself.

-Yeah. -Thank you.

[woman] Like it's scary.

[background chatter]

[laughter]

-And it's like crawled my arm. -[man] Oh, no.

Then I had to keep my composure on the phone like,

"It's not that on me, no.

Keep talking, keep talking on the phone right now."

That was so funny.

-That's so sad. -I mean that's not good.

-I'm trying save the day. -Like he does.

-I don't think I would've kept my composure at all. -No.

I'm somehow... Somehow that's like one of my skills, it's just being like,

"Something horrifying is not happening to me."

[man] No, I think that's probably where I'd get my,

my composure, bugs don't freak me out too much.

...in the city, so you have to be within the city to teach here.

Great.

I'm kind of stuck.

It's okay. I'm enjoying it, though, so I'm not feeling too--

-What do you teach then? -I teach fifth grade.

Fifth grade? Do you have like a certain--

My mom is a seventh-grade science teacher.

-Oh, Okay. -Yeah.

-It's... My specialty is reading, language arts. -Okay.

-That's awesome, yes. -I enjoyed it.

I was--

'Cause growing up in the suburbs,

we've got here sometimes, but now that we are...

Like, I'm down here, now I can take advantages of the museums,

Navy Pier, all that, so it's been kind of exciting.

So, are you enjoying... You like it Navy Pier, you guys?

-I actually-- I haven't been yet. -Yeah.

I've never been to Navy Pier.

Yeah. I'm gonna take her to the Cubs game.

I've never been.

Hit the beaches.

The beaches are awesome.

Yeah, we were out there earlier.

-It was so nice. Beautiful. -Yeah, it's pretty [indistinct].

Did I tell-- I think I told you. Did I tell you about this guy?

He might be something we discovered.

-It's a small, small Jewish world. -He went to my temple.

[laughs] She would know.

Where's the other one at this party?

Do you want more food?

No, I'm full.

All I ate were grapes.

You ate a hot dog too.

Oh, yeah, that's right.

I forgot.

Can I get a light?

Yeah, sure.

Thank you.

Thank you.

They call it a babushka even if you're not an old grandma.

-Isn't that essentially what that head covering is? -I don't know.

I think-- Yeah, yeah. No, I think if it's something kapustka then it's cabbage

Like really close.

You are not Jim.

So What was the, uh, what's the boy like last night?

-He was a waiter? -He hasn't had sex with him yet.

So, you guys got a little cute, all right?

No, there was a woman, there was a woman

-in the bed with them, I mean. -In the bed with us, yeah.

What?

What time is your interview tomorrow?

Do you want me to walk with you?

It's at 11.

You don't have to if you don't want to, and you got class all day.

No, I want to. I wanna see this place.

Yeah, I'm so not qualified.

But if I get it, that'd be great.

I would love to not have to clean anymore.

You'll get it.

Do you know what you're wearing?

No.

Well, I think I have an idea.

I'm tired.

-Ready for bed? -Yeah.

[indistinct]

You're going to do great tomorrow, okay?

Thank you.

Do you know where my shoes are?

-Uh, yeah, I think they are over here. -Okay.

Cool.

Thanks.

Hey, don't be nervous.

Hmm. Thank you.

You're gonna do fine.

I'll meet you right after, okay?

Okay.

-We're going to be late. -Thank you.

You look beautiful.

Thanks.

Let's go.

Mercy!

Oh, my god. It's my mom.

So? Who cares?

Yeah, she doesn't know.

Hey, Mercy. What are you doing here?

-Oh, god. This is Jesse. -Hi, Jessie.

-Jesse, this is my mom. -Mercy, what's going on here?

I'm actually late for an interview.

-I got to go. I'm sorry. -[Mom] Mercy.

Mom, I'll talk to you later.

-Oh, fuck. -You haven't... You haven't told her yet?

You don't understand how she is. She will flip out.

[Mom] So, how did the job interview go?

Uh, it went good.

Yeah. I'm just...

I'm not sure if they are gonna end up taking me, but yeah.

I would love it if they did.

Um-hum.

It's a really nice office though.

-Is it? -Yeah, it's beautiful.

You'd feel comfortable?

-I think I'd be comfortable. Yeah. -Hum.

So, well, uh...

We are having a pot luck at the Church this Sunday.

Come by at about six. You don't have to make anything or...

anything, you know.

Hmm, I don't think I can.

-Oh? -Yeah.

How are you doing?

I don't-- [clears throat]

[Mom sighs]

Thanks for meeting with me.

I am... Uh.

When we ran into you the other day,

it came as quite a surprise to me and your stepdad.

Yeah.

I didn't want you to actually find out that way.

I wanted to talk with you about it first.

So, I'm sorry that it was a shock.

About being gay?

Yeah, about being gay.

You know how I feel about this?

You know I think it's wrong,

but you seem to think it's okay.

Because I've felt this way since I was a child, Mom.

If...

It's not a choice.

This is...

I would just love it if you could...

see me as your daughter, and accept me for who I am.

And not see me as just being gay.

It's a part of who I am.

It's really hard to talk to you about this...

because I know you don't approve.

This girl, what do you know about her?

I know I love her.

Yeah, I love her a lot.

Have you thought this through? About what this could mean to your family?

It has nothing to do with you.

It has nothing to do with you. This is my life and who I am, Mom.

It has nothing to do with you.

Okay. I get it.

This is how you feel right now.

It's not a feeling.

I want what's best for you.

-Please believe I do. -Sure.

But as your mother, I couldn't live with myself

if I didn't tell you that this is wrong.

That this is against everything I raised you to be.

It's... it's not normal. It's not right.

It's disgusting.

You're an embarrassment.

God did not intend for you to be with a woman.

[sighs]

He has a great plan for you, and this is not it.

You know, for once, I would like a normal daughter.

Not somebody that's scraping the bottom of the barrel with these types of people.

A normal daughter?

I can't believe you just said that.

A normal daughter?

Wow, Mom.

I don't have any idea what I am to you.

I'm just like something that you...

put all this pressure and labels on that I'm not.

Oh, wow.

I'd like to pray for you.

Really.

Father God,

please guide your very troubled daughter, Mercy,

and show her the way and get away from these unclean, evil,

despicable characters that do these...

Do these dirty things.

Show her the way, God.

If you're merciful, please help Mercy.

Amen.

You're just gonna leave?

I can't even be with you right now.

I don't even want to talk to you.

Just go.

Wait. No.

Argh! What the fuck!

What the fuck?

[groans]

Fucking bitch.

Now what, uh?

Against the wall, against the wall.

[moaning and grunting]

-Oh, my god! -What?

What... What happened?

Mercy.

[moans]

Are you okay?

Are you gonna tell me what happened?

Can't.

I've been worried about you all night,

and you never called me after you got done with your mom.

Mercy, why didn't you call me?

Where did you go?

I don't know.

It's okay.

You don't understand.

I hate myself for it.

I fucked up completely.

What are you talking about?

Mercy.

I fucked a guy last night.

What?

I fucked a guy last night.

I was so upset with my mom that I just...

I wasn't thinking.

I'm so sorry.

[sobbing]

Are you serious?

I'm sorry.

I fucked up.

I'm so sorry.

Don't. Just don't.

I messed up.

You know what?

You don't deserve me.

You fucked some guy, and you ruined us.

-Come here, please. -No, I'm sorry.

-Why? -You don't even want me.

You could have called me. You could have asked for my help,

but you went straight to drinking.

You went straight to drinking,

and you didn't even...

I know that.

Why didn't you call me?

I wasn't thinking. I fucked up.

You fucked up.

Come here, please.

You don't love me.

I do.

-Oh, I want you. -No, you don't.

Yes, I do.

It's done.

-I'm leaving. -No.

-I'm leaving, Mercy, I'm leaving -No.

-You don't want me. I don't want you either. -Why? Why?

No, wait.

I can't do this. I can't even be around you.

-No. -You don't understand.

-You fucking ruined everything. -But why?

-What? It's true. -I can't do this anymore.

Fine.

I don't care.

Hey, it's me.

I don't even know what to say, uh...

Please just call me whenever you get this.

[plane passing overhead]

I'm Mercy. I'm an alcoholic.

Hi, Mercy.

So, I really want to use right now.

I'm at bottom in my life.

[cries]

I have lost somebody that was really important to me.

[sobbing]

I really messed up.

I just feel lost.

I don't wanna feel anything.

I just wanna be complet-- completely numb.

Thanks, Mercy.

-Hey. -Hi. Hey, Mercy.

-How is it going? -I'm doing well, how about yourself?

Good.

-Has it been busy? -Oh, no, it hasn't been that busy.

A little crazy earlier, there's some paper work

-that you need to take care of. -Okay.

-So, I left that there and there for you. -Thank you.

Other than that, it's been a pretty slow day.

-Okay, cool. -All righty.

-Have a good one. -You too.

-Okay. Bye-bye. -Take care.

[man] So, when I came out to my parents, shortly afterwards, like I stated before,

they found out that I worked in the adult entertainment industry.

Um... And I went to Catholic school.

I was a good Catholic kid.

I went to church, I had my communion.

Um...

And then just so many things happened in my family.

I'd gotten banished by a lot of my cousins and my aunts and uncles,

and still don't respect me, now. Um...

And it wasn't until two years ago that my parents had been talking to me again,

and that's because they found out that I had HIV.

And so the minute they found that out when I called them up and then said,

"Hey, Mom, hey, Dad.

So I just wanna surprise you now because you're gonna have

something on your health insurance plan."

Um... The first person I called was my parents,

second place that I called was my work

and let them know about everything that happened.

And something snapped with them at that moment.

They called me up and was at every single doctor appointment with me.

They said prayers at church and everything.

It's getting better. A lot of people forgive. God forgives. Family forgives.

[woman] Um... So, I was just feeling very lonely and depressed,

and not, um... Like not really knowing if anyone cared and loved me.

In my mind, like you know, "Your family loves you.

Your friends love you" but not really feeling it.

So, I went through this really dark time

where I was just thinking, like, maybe, like, they're gonna care.

"They're going to care once I'm not here",

and... But instead of

actually reaching out and telling them, like,

"I need you guys to make me feel loved." Like,

"I don't feel that you guys love me, that you guys care."

So, I contemplated suicide and I thought about...

"Okay, like, it's gonna matter now. I'm gonna matter now

when you're at my funeral, and you have to say something."

Um...

And it was not long after that, that a friend invited me to church.

And now I'm hearing about...

this... God.

This Being that created the world, that...

created the universe and the stars and knows all of these things.

This majestic Being loves me.

Like loves me, and I'm seeking love in this moment.

And I just felt overwhelmed with, with love.

There are so many... things in the melting pot.

We just got to be accepting of who you are and whatever you do and be accepting.

It's just like all the teenage girls are like afraid that they're gonna be turning gay

just because they found Ruby Rose attractive.

It's not like, you know, you're not homosexual.

You just found one certain person very, very attractive.

It's like me, and, when I was like a teenager,

I thought Angelina Jolie was super pretty.

I'm like, "I'm not gay. I just like the person's aesthetic."

[man] Is... Religion plays a lot-- a factor in that.

And then also, I don't wanna disappoint my parents because I'm like...

Everything, like... I have a younger brother, but I'm like...

accomplished because I'm like the first person to like ever graduated from college

from both sides of my family or high school.

I have like a steady job, and I'm like...

I know my parents love me and stuff and they wouldn't, like, disown me or anything,

but it's like, what if I do come out and it's like...?

Argh.

[woman] To not be telling the people you love the most,

things that are happening in your life or what's going on

and just keeping that all inside

and keeping a surface story for what's going on your life.

It's exhausting.

It's absolutely exhausting,

and you just get to a point where you're like,

"Is this the day? Is today the day that I'm going to come clean

about this thing that I've been telling up this other B role."

I've been telling you guys this whole other story for so long.

And the funny thing is you almost wonder if they don't already know.

You know, like, there's things that I've kept private in my life from my family,

and... my mom hands around stuff all the time.

and I'm like, "You are way too smart, lady."

Like, "Do you know? Do you not know?"

And I'm like, "Well, we'll save that for another day."

[background chatter]

Bye.

Yes.

Bye.

-Goodbye. -Thank you.

Yes. See you later.

[phone rings]

Hello?

Hey.

Hey.

Hey.

-Thanks for coming. -Of course.

I got you something to drink.

-Do you want orange soda or cranberry? -Uh, cranberry.

I thought so.

-Thank you. -Yeah.

Uh, do you wanna sit down?

So you doing okay?

-Yes. I'm good. -Good.

I like your hair.

It looks... It suits you.

Thanks.

And how's school going?

-It's going good. -Um-hum.

Yeah, I finally, uh, passed all my basics.

Oh, good. That's great.

I'm so proud of you.

And you?

How are you doing?

I'm good. Yeah, and, uh...

Um...

I'm working nights at the clinic.

That's going well.

I'm thinking about applying at some schools. Possibly.

-Really? -Yeah.

What would you study?

Literature.

That makes sense.

Yeah.

You're still at the cafe? I, uh, walk by sometimes on my way to work.

Yeah. Yeah. I'm, I'm still there.

I won't, I won't be there for long, though.

Um, my girlfriend owns a salon, and I'll work the front desk.

It's better hours. I can do my homework when it's slow.

Oh, that makes sense.

Your girlfriend?

Yeah.

And how's that going?

It's good. It's really good.

You know, it's... we're still at the beginning,

-so it's just getting to know each other. -Um-hum.

It's perfect.

Nothing damaged.

Right.

I miss you.

I am so sorry for how everything went.

And it's completely my fault, and I know that I really hurt you.

I can't.

I can't.

You can't tell me you don't love me.

I know you do.

I can't.

I've changed. I'm like a different person now.

I've like cleaned up my whole life.

I would never do that again.

I can't.

I can't do this.

Why?

You're toxic.

I can't do this.

I've moved on.

You will too.

I just thought maybe you would...

Mercy.

I care about you.

And I will always wish the best for you.

You are going to be okay.

You are a fighter.

All right?

I've gotta go to work.

Right now?

Yeah.

-It was good to see you, Mercy. -Um-hum.

I'm sorry.

-I should get going. -Okay.

Take care. Okay?

You too.

I'll see you around?

See you around.

[piano music]