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What's most stressful for a man
isn't his job or his abusive boss.
It's a fact that he loses all willpower
the moment he sees a pair of beautiful legs
before him.
- You're a virgin? - What?
Are you a virgin?
Introduce yourself.
I'm Xiaotian. Tian Xiaoye.
I'm 24.
Get to the point.
I like music.
Blues of the '50s,
rock and roll,
Wang Feng--
You were a keyboardist in school?
You weren't a music student.
I majored in computer science.
You haven't answered my question.
Are you a virgin?
Is that relevant to the interview?
Studies have shown
that when male virgins lie,
their nostrils flare
and turn a prominent pink.
You checked.
- So you are. - No.
- You are. - No.
Any thoughts on square dance music?
This is a trick interview question.
It's dangerous to show
any obvious bias.
When asked to make a choice between two answers,
the wrong choice could be fatal.
I think we should
analyze square dance music objectively.
We should look at it from various angles.
Are you looking?
Can I get back to you on that?
He follows 922 people on Weibo.
He has 8,431 posts and one follower.
He's a homebody.
He only reposts.
They're inspirational quotes.
- How refreshing. - Refreshing is still boring.
It's not totally bad.
He has a follower.
- Who is it? - My mom.
What are your thoughts, Chief?
He'll do.
That means...
He'll represent youth.
I object.
Handsome guy.
Let's look at your answer.
Which one was it?
His nose is bleeding.
You really are a virgin.
You want an employee that's distracted by pretty coworkers?
He's sensitive to criticism.
He's going to repost quotes.
See?
I understand. The interview is over.
You heartless man!
Get lost!
Darling.
Why are you here?
You fooled around while I was away?
- I didn't. - It's on the Internet.
I was just flirting. It's harmless.
- Honey. - Anna?
He's two-timing?
Shuangxi.
You said you don't like young girls.
A third one.
What's going on here?
My goodness, a fourth one.
You're all mistaken.
Let us talk later.
"Us"?
Whom will you choose?
It's a little complicated.
Relationships are...
They are...
about freedom, equality, and universal love.
Universal love.
Universal your butt!
What's this?
I haven't lived my life. Am I dying?
No. This can't be.
I haven't had a girlfriend, no first kiss, and I've never had sex.
It can't end this way.
Help!
Couples use at least two condoms weekly.
So, 700,000 condoms are used in this city every week.
Two billion sperms per condom
equals how many sperms in total?
But I...
Six years have passed, and I still haven't used my present.
God made a woman from a man's rib.
There's at least one woman for each man.
Where's my woman?
Why?
Why are couples sharing food
while I eat bad food by myself?
Who's there?
Don't worry.
It's between us men.
Stop living in a fantasy.
If you hadn't taken the blow meant for Chief,
you wouldn't be standing here.
I wouldn't need to see your unlucky face or work with you.
You learned to dodge.
Go. Conduct the interview.
Good morning. How are you?
Thank you.
I think all paparazzi are rock and rollers.
Rock and roll inspires their sensational headlines.
What's more important than the job is attending shows for free.
That's the greatest pleasure.
Of course, besides music,
you get to see milky skin
red shoes, milky thighs, and breasts.
You're covering the event?
Are you talking to me?
Women at music festivals are hot.
She's not really my type,
but I can't be picky.
My birthday wish hasn't come true yet.
You're working today?
Yes.
Scan this
and you get Secondhand Rose's single for free.
Secondhand Rose? I love Liang Long.
Is he tall and suave or thin in person?
Can you get me a personal item?
A towel? A toothbrush? Anything.
If you're willing,
I can take you anywhere.
You'll take me anywhere?
What's this?
He's hitting on me.
I'm innocent.
- You're just after sex. - Yes.
I'm just asking about May Day.
We are...
Rock.
It's Ruke.
Oh, Ruke.
Look at him.
He has no sense of fashion.
It's fashion.
Fashion. Trying to hit on women.
Try your sister.
My sister?
You forgot to interview the hottest band of the year?
I just didn't go.
How could he say that so calmly?
They're just an idol group, not a rock band.
The lead singer is shallow.
He's not interesting.
I see.
They're an idol group.
The lead singer is boring.
An idol group.
The lead singer is shallow and boring.
They're...
The deal's signed?
They're difficult and won't give in.
Take it down.
Can I have it? I'm thirsty.
No. Settle it with them or you don't get a thing.
I'll try.
Replace it.
- It's done. - It is?
I'll explain it.
They agreed to all our terms.
Why?
Seeing how strict we are with our staff changed their minds.
Stand straight! Don't slouch!
This way please.
Excuse me. Please bend down.
- Oh, it's hot. - Hot?
We'll fix it.
What the heck?
My stupidity helped close the deal,
and I was commended.
Should I be happy or not?
Also,
pop music can't be rock music.
Rock is spiritual.
It has no form.
Someone responded.
Muscled Ripped Jeans.
Muscled Ripped Jeans.
Strawberry, Midi, Coachella...
and even Glastonbury.
This guy's good.
But the record label listed seems wrong.
Should I follow him?
Muscled Ripped Jeans?
He's not looking for a young plaything, is he?
Are my jeans ripped?
He has many female fans. Why choose me?
Wait a minute. So what if I'm a homebody?
What's wrong with that?
Xiao Tianye.
Are you Xiao Tianye?
You are?
Muscled Ripped Jeans.
I look like an idiot who's starving.
You expected me to have a beard?
Profile photos are fake.
I'm Milan.
Tian Xiaoye.
You're Tian Xiaoye?
Your username is Xiao Tianye.
It's switched.
Her smile brings warmth to the entire world.
It's nice to meet you in person.
I'm turned on. She hasn't noticed, has she?
I'm hungry. I'm going to eat.
She didn't.
Women really can't resist mini lobsters.
Tear it up. Put it in your mouth.
Lick your fingers. Smack your lips.
The standard routine.
It whets my appetite.
None for you?
It hasn't been deveined,
but it's delicious.
Let me see your left hand.
Your left hand.
Let me see.
I'm good.
It's our first meeting.
She's bold.
Open up.
Romance awaits you.
- One, two... - Are all women's hands
as soft as this?
three, four.
You'll have four romantic encounters.
You're blossoming.
Your face is red.
Do I look like a pervert?
Did she see it?
Hot.
Too spicy?
Why come here then?
Can I have some vinegar?
Vinegar.
I'll get it.
Does vinegar go with the dish?
They're not pancakes.
She's just trying to embarrass me.
You carry your bag everywhere?
It's for safety.
Safety?
Excuse me. I have to take this call.
Hello?
It must be her boyfriend. Game over.
A babe like her wouldn't like me.
The lobsters are wasted.
I should have invited my buddies.
Lesson learned.
Online romance?
Let's go somewhere else after this.
Sure.
It was her girlfriends, not a boyfriend.
They came for support.
Great!
My zodiac sign is Taurus. You?
Virgo?
Virgin.
Careful.
My mum said only if I marry a virgin
will I become a rich woman.
Virgin.
I'm sorry. No one answered.
Do you live nearby?
Yay, I won!
You drink.
If I don't make a move, I'll be a hypocrite.
But this is too sudden.
If only I could brush my teeth first.
It's 3 o'clock. Oh, no.
Hurry.
Let's go.
Come on.
Hurry up.
Goodness.
Why did we drink so much?
Take care of her.
Bye, Virgin.
Chief Editor Shuangxi.
I wouldn't hesitate.
You're working out?
Yes.
I need to pee.
I reek of alcohol.
Can I take a shower?
Do you mind?
Shower? What does that mean?
In the movies, they shower before having sex.
Should I get ready?
Can I have a clean T-shirt?
Please don't be ugly once your makeup is removed.
Please be beautiful even without your makeup.
Please be beautiful even after--
Is that you?
This is what I look like.
It's what you wanted.
Come on.
The bed's comfortable.
Yes, it is.
Aren't you joining me?
Happy birthday, Tian Xiaoye.
She's asleep?
What's this?
What a turn of events.
Wake up. I'm ready.
Open your eyes. I'm coming.
What's up?
I thought...
you might be cold.
That wouldn't be enough.
I'm thirsty.
Want some?
Go to sleep.
Is this love?
Let's go to a concert.
Sure.
Bye.
Are we dating?
How would you spend...
your last day alive?
I can't say.
Guess what I would do.
I'd witness the end...
on the rooftop with my favorite person.
Like we're doing right now?
Almost.
To be together with someone you like...
is a luxury.
Who knows?
The world could end today.
I would be perfectly happy.
A beautiful woman is dating you.
She's drunk in your home, yet you do nothing?
It feels like you've had too much to drink and you just made it up.
Look.
Give me her number.
All her contact details.
- You can't do that. - Until you're away.
You jerk.
You're my friend.
Dinner's on you.
I'm telling you this because we're buddies.
To provoke you.
You gave up a big chance.
Either you're soft or you're gay.
I think...
I think...
this could be love.
This is why after all this time, you're still a virgin.
I can't relate to a lowlife like you.
Be honest.
Was it because you didn't know how to do it?
I've seen how it's done.
That's never enough.
Real experience isn't a visual.
It's tactile.
- Tactile? - Yes.
Give me your hand. Touch this.
- What is it? - It's tofu.
It's a woman's skin.
Not always.
This is optimal.
Let's improvise.
Feel your fingertips
on her smooth, white skin.
That's right.
Raise your glasses.
Take care of my sister.
Look. They understand.
Do you?
So, I should...
make dinner?
Milan suddenly disappeared.
No blog posts.
She wasn't online, and I couldn't contact her.
What happened?
Was she an angel that came to give hope
only to disappear after?
Disappeared? You missed your chance.
You were in bed with a woman, yet nothing happened.
Tell us how you overcame
man's ever-present urge to procreate.
Tell us.
I'm a virgin, not an animal.
Are you calling Chief an animal?
You brat.
Speak in Chinese.
I'm serious about Milan.
Come to your senses.
How can she be single?
Use your brain.
She's unavailable.
You want to pursue her?
Don't you feel any guilt?
Ignore them.
It's about you battling a man you can't see.
She's the prize.
Don't feel guilty.
Your job is to attack again and again
till you win the prize.
Your comments are invaluable, Chief.
To celebrate,
let's order another round of beef?
One more order of beef!
The 28-dollar one!
Chief is so generous.
Milan?
All right. Bye.
She's nearby. She'll be here soon.
I have a date. I'm leaving.
Bye.
Xiaoye.
You're here.
Excuse me.
Ouyang Jing. He's Xiaoye.
Come in.
You're Milan's friend? Sit.
Waiter! Add two more places.
Two orders of the 128-dollar beef. Now!
Waiter, more beer!
Chief.
You're a realist.
Where have you been?
You like Xiaoye?
It's absurd.
He's fun to be with.
I called you.
You're coworkers?
No. I design electronic cups.
Electronic cups?
What kind of cups? Teacups?
Bras?
You've heard?
He must have seen them on adult sites.
Homebodies know.
I saw it on a science website.
It tracks users' temperature, blood pressure, and hormones.
It's high-end.
Does it enlarge breasts?
It's being tested.
How?
Designers test it on themselves.
So you're wearing the product you designed?
I admire scientists.
I was worried.
I'm fine.
I have muscles.
I don't quite believe in such things.
It's nonsense.
It's just underwear.
This is the electronic chip.
This is the sensory device.
Touch it.
It's quite warm.
Let me see.
- The material is pliable. - Yes.
It's well made.
Too bad. It's not for men.
We are designing products for men.
Male underwear.
I would like a pair.
That's not enough.
When it's ready, we will buy a pair each.
To underwear. Cheers.
- Cheers. - Here.
Cheers.
Your phone.
Messenger.
Messenger.
It's good you're back.
Hello?
Come out.
- Is it your boyfriend? - Where to next?
KTV.
Sorry. I have to go.
Goddess, don't leave.
Let's go.
KTV.
Please look after Jing.
She'll be safe with me.
Next time, it'll be my treat.
Bye.
Let's go.
I'll keep my sadness to myself
You can take your tenderness with you
From now on, I have nothing
Please think of me
Once in a while
Great!
Who's next?
Me.
Quick.
Move. It's not your concert.
If I hadn't met you
Where would I be?
What would my days be like?
Would I appreciate life?
Meeting a special someone
Leading an ordinary life
Would I possibly be
Happily in love?
Time passes quickly, I only care about you
Bye.
Are you okay?
I beg you
Please don't leave me
Besides you, there's no one else for me
The song never ends.
Because we're alone.
Milan disappeared like a plane that went off radar.
What should I do?
What do I do?
It's very simple.
I think she has a boyfriend.
As is common in television dramas,
it's a problem with the guy.
Either he's a two-timer or he dumped her.
In any case, she's very angry.
She wants to indulge herself and fill her empty soul.
At this time,
she meets a devoted man like you.
A devotee.
Here's a secret.
In this world, goddesses don't exist.
Women have evolved.
They sleep with you and shame you for taking responsibility.
You mean...
she doesn't like me?
Women's hearts are like needles.
When you find them, you'll get pricked and end up bleeding.
Moreover, you're just a toad trying to get a beautiful princess.
She wasn't dating you.
She was simply walking her pet.
She probably made up with her boyfriend.
She's gone because there's no point in seeing you again.
Moreover, if she were single,
every man would be your rival, me included.
Since she has a boyfriend,
you only have to defeat him.
Find Milan. Tell her you like her.
I love you.
I...
You.
I want...
I...
Don't get too serious
Don't hesitate
Our feelings are no longer sincere
We don't trust one another
After you left
I looked towards you
You still live in my heart
Please say yes
Please say yes
Please say yes
Please say yes
Please say yes
Please say yes
One hundred yeses
One thousand yeses
Please say yes
Yes.
Xiaoye.
Tian Xiaoye
Let's go.
Where to?
My place.
Is it okay?
Yes.
Let's go.
All right.
Come on.
There's beer.
The TV remote is on the sofa.
I'll get changed and then I'll reply to an email.
Amuse yourself.
Just a minute.
Get some rest.
You had something to tell me.
I wanted...
to tell you...
that I...
Xiaoye.
When I'm with you...
I'm happy.
I have no worries.
I can be myself.
Who is it?
It might be him.
Jing.
I've got a meeting nearby. I'll sleep here.
He's here?
Is it convenient?
It's okay.
Come out. It's Jing.
Xiaoye. You...
I'll leave.
No.
Why is this happening?
Conclusion.
It's because I'm a coward.
I'm a coward.
Cowards don't deserve love.
Love.
Love.
Xiaoye?
Good morning.
Who are you?
I'm Yuki.
You're at my house.
You were great last night.
What?
Treat love like a buffet.
If you don't like steak, change it.
Choose pork, fish, or chicken.
The point is to not end up sitting by the table and starving.
Look at Yuki.
Doesn't she look like a delicious beef stew?
Right. Perhaps we're compatible.
I don't like...
You're so rude.
It's okay.
He got dumped.
Hey.
Leave him.
All right.
You might be able to save him.
I'm going. Thanks.
What?
The amorous man is going home?
Amorous men easily get lonely.
That's not my home.
It's a house.
Watch him.
Bye.
Yuki. Your food's ready.
- Coming, Mum. - Mum?
What's your monthly income?
Three thousand dollars during probation.
Four thousand five hundred dollars after that.
Four thousand five hundred dollars.
That means if you start now
and don't eat or drink for ten years,
there should be enough for the down payment on a toilet.
It'll do.
I'll hand Jiahao to you.
Jiahao?
- Jiahao. - Mom.
Take Jiahao. I'll make milk.
Say hello...
Say hi to Dad.
Dad?
You're an easy target.
I really thought we...
You really are a virgin.
You were too drunk to do anything.
I'm sorry.
Jiahao's dad apologized for leaving.
Women hate men who apologize.
Are you close to Chief?
He comes to our bar often.
He's a little pervy, but he's a nice guy.
Did he fool around at the office?
Feign ignorance.
I won't tell him.
Excuse us.
Thank you.
Baby.
Have you thought about marriage?
Marriage?
For women, dating is about marriage.
But men mess around even after marriage.
Men and women are on different channels.
Right?
Men do commit but soon forget.
Women keep waiting,
but there's a limit.
Xiaoye.
If you like her, don't give up.
But...
women don't find me attractive.
Do you know what a woman wants?
Love?
It's respect.
You'll come to know it.
Xiaoye, you have your own appeal.
If it doesn't work out with her,
come to me.
Try marriage.
Love is worth dying for
Give it your all
That's how deep this love goes...
She's singing with such anguish.
It's not anguish.
It's desire.
Yes.
Tian Xiaoye.
I don't like virgins.
Why are you one?
To keep me at bay?
Who said I'm a virgin?
Friendly advice.
You shouldn't have personal chats with friends
on office computers.
Having to repost them was tiring.
Save both of us.
I'll even pay.
This is illegal.
The draft article should be in my inbox...
looking clean and smelling nice by tonight.
Be good.
I wish I could disappear.
It's a doubles match now.
It's still desire.
You were immersed in the songs.
Was it silly?
Simplicity is good.
Being an adult is tiring.
It's hard to be silly sometimes.
Having someone be silly with...
is even harder.
I'm going this way.
I'm going that way.
Right. Bye.
Okay.
Wait!
Oh, Dutch.
You're up.
Want to have lunch?
The fridge is empty.
I'll buy some food and stock your fridge.
What's wrong?
I have...
This afternoon...
I have an interview.
I'll take you home.
I...
It's okay.
I...
I'll leave soon.
Which of the bands do you prefer?
Secondhand Rose.
What do you think of Tambourine?
They're just an idol group.
It's not rock music.
Their lead singer is shallow.
I don't like him.
How about...
You're attending the show?
Yes.
I'm conducting interviews.
It's been a while.
How have you been?
It's been a long time since we last met.
Here.
You're going to the show?
Yes.
Let's go.
Okay.
Wait.
I slept with Jing.
Xiaoye.
Hello. Sorry to interrupt.
Hello.
Yaowu.
Are you okay?
Cheer up.
- Ken. - David.
You've been ignoring me.
We meet again.
Xiaoye.
Ken's a famous producer.
He works with me.
Hello.
Ken, long time no see.
Long.
- Brother Long. - Hello, Chief.
- Sit. - Sure.
Little girl, you got bigger.
I mean, your face.
We're back together.
Be kind.
Didn't you break up?
We just got back together.
Oh, don't mind me.
I'll wait.
Just joking.
Xiaoye, give them your business card.
Business card.
Wow, Chief.
Your business cards are unique.
They're in 3D print.
3D.
Do you have regular ones?
In 2D.
Business cards.
He's new. Forgive him.
Brother, did your glasses make you a dimwit?
Are you okay?
I'm fine.
I'm fine.
Are you feeling awkward?
Why would I?
I think...
she's doing well.
He is too.
You got over her?
No.
That's why I hope her boyfriend is more capable than I am.
Everyone is.
Don't say that. I think you're great.
Let's...
Let's have a drink.
That night...
It was wrong of me.
I wanted to be with you.
I thought I could forget her.
But I can't.
I know.
Milan is beautiful
and alluring.
But I can be like her.
I'll listen to the same music...
read the same books...
and have the same hobbies.
I can smile at you...
like she does.
Don't become her.
You're you.
Xiaoye.
It's because...
you're as lonely as I am.
I really like you.
But I like Milan.
This is Tian Xiaoye.
- Hello. - We've met.
Have a seat.
Thanks for your support.
Let's begin.
As an up-and-coming music producer,
what are your thoughts about local music festivals?
They've become a common form of entertainment
for the youth.
I'll be managing the sound
for an upcoming music festival.
You composed the festival's theme song.
The lyrics sound like a love song,
but it's in the style of rock?
Aren't love and rock similar?
For love, we struggle, sacrifice, cheat, and betray.
I see.
Danni wrote the lyrics for it.
How did this come about?
She's my wife.
Milan's married?
- Can we print this? - Print what?
My wife? Or...
I'm not a celebrity.
What's the point?
That's true.
Can you introduce the lineup for the festival?
Our lineup is spectacular.
What about Milan?
Sorry?
I said...
what about Milan?
How is this relevant?
It's a misunderstanding.
What is it?
I want to hit him.
We're working.
I want to hit him!
You want to what?
Get out. Get out.
Sorry.
Just a little hiccup.
Let's reschedule.
I'm sorry.
You hit me.
Go and hit him.
Save Milan.
Live happily ever after.
Tian Xiaoye!
That's your fantasy, right?
I quit.
You're quitting because you were dumped?
So casually?
You have no right.
Compare yourself to your love rival.
You can hardly support yourself!
Have you ever done anything meaningful?
Why would Milan like you?
Because you're single?
Because you love her?
Your love is cheap.
Take this. Submit the draft for this by tomorrow.
You hear me?
Hello?
I saw Xiaoye today.
What's going on?
You never asked before.
I don't mean to.
That guy isn't good enough for you.
Who's good enough?
Someone handsome?
With money?
Married like you?
I was clear...
from the very beginning.
All this time,
you've never said...
you love me.
Open the door!
Open the door!
I need to speak to you!
Milan!
Do you have any dry clothes?
No.
A towel?
No.
A T-shirt? Anything.
What do you want?
I want to say I like you.
From the moment we met.
And?
Be with me.
What for?
To...
have fun.
After that?
It's not fixed,
but...
but it's with the intention of marriage.
Not just for sex?
Like with Jing?
You're just after a one-night stand.
Don't lie.
What about you?
Ken has a wife.
You tell yourself it's love.
You pretend you're in love.
I'm not pretending.
I never said I was in love.
It's wrong.
I want a fresh start.
But I can't.
Tian Xiaoye.
Yes?
Can you understand...
this feeling?
I can.
You said...
you're happiest
when you're with me.
Yes.
But it's childish.
I can't be an adult when I'm with you.
I'm sorry.
Can I kiss you?
No.
A hug?
No.
Just a small one.
No.
Thank you.
UPLOAD SUCCESSFUL
I'll answer this.
Shall we get some food?
Ouyang?
Wait for me.
Will you record an album or go on tour?
You came.
To have a look.
Not bad, right?
Yes. It's good.
As expected of you.
Hello.
I'm from M-Radio.
Can I interview you?
Which bands do you like?
Let's meet later.
No. You're busy.
Go home and rest.
I'll make time for you.
I have good news.
I left her.
We can be together.
If you like her, don't give up.
Do you know what a woman wants?
Respect.
I lost myself while I was with you.
I don't want...
Milan is beautiful
and alluring...
but I can be like her.
Have you ever done anything meaningful?
Why would Milan like you?
Because you're single?
Because you love her?
Your love is cheap.
But I like Milan.
I don't want that life.
I really like you.
Be with me.
I love you.
I love you.
Go for it!
Friends, let's begin!
Spain.
Nice to meet you.
- Hello. - Hello.
I couldn't even say hello properly.
Did you know it would be a guy?
I didn't, they told me
I can take this.
I'm a guy, I'll take the initiative.
You want to be a gentleman, right?
You're experienced, right?
You're pretty, can I kiss you?
I say don't be too nervous.
It's just a kiss.
Be cool about it then it's over. Good?
- Okay. - Kiss me.
Sure.
Then close your eyes.
Do you have a boyfriend?
I don't have a girlfriend either.
I have a wife, kids, everything.
What a happy family.
Can I just kiss you?
Yes.
Yes? Then I'll...
Here I come.
Close your eyes, please.
This is embarrassing.
She's so shy.
You're such a brute.
It's recorded.
Good, we're done.
- Sorry. - Sorry.
That felt amazing.
How talented.
I think so too.
How could you?
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