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Presenting...
2
00:00:01,630 --> 00:00:05,669
"Sledon Cooper's Top Five Sources
of News From My Childgood".
3
00:00:05,670 --> 00:00:06,859
Number five:
4
00:00:06,860 --> 00:00:09,299
Star Trek Fan Club Magazine.
5
00:00:09,300 --> 00:00:13,060
Mom, DeForest Kelley's favorite
episode is "The Empath."
6
00:00:13,070 --> 00:00:14,410
Good to know.
7
00:00:14,420 --> 00:00:16,439
Number four: the Weather Cube
8
00:00:16,440 --> 00:00:17,899
from RadioShack.
9
00:00:17,900 --> 00:00:19,899
The humidity is 90%
10
00:00:19,900 --> 00:00:22,650
with a dew point of 79.5 degrees.
11
00:00:22,660 --> 00:00:23,760
Mom!
12
00:00:23,770 --> 00:00:26,559
The dew point is 79.5 degrees.
13
00:00:26,560 --> 00:00:27,879
Okay.
14
00:00:27,880 --> 00:00:29,229
Number three:
15
00:00:29,230 --> 00:00:31,189
The MacNeil/Lehrer NewsHour.
16
00:00:31,190 --> 00:00:33,189
Such a great theme song.
17
00:00:34,360 --> 00:00:36,449
♪ Buh-buh-bum. ♪
18
00:00:36,450 --> 00:00:37,629
Number two:
19
00:00:37,630 --> 00:00:39,849
Meemaw after a few beers.
20
00:00:39,850 --> 00:00:42,059
It took a while, but we
finally picked a new name
21
00:00:42,060 --> 00:00:44,770
for my bowling team: The Ball Busters.
22
00:00:45,590 --> 00:00:46,909
Hey, Mom.
23
00:00:46,910 --> 00:00:49,379
Guess what Meemaw named her
bowling team? The Ball...
24
00:00:49,380 --> 00:00:50,729
And the number one source
25
00:00:50,730 --> 00:00:52,550
of news from my childhood:
26
00:00:52,560 --> 00:00:55,410
the bulletin board at the train store.
27
00:00:57,070 --> 00:01:00,064
News about trains in
a store full of trains.
28
00:01:00,070 --> 00:01:01,129
Yummy.
29
00:01:01,130 --> 00:01:04,040
How did this not make The
MacNeil/Lehrer NewsHour?
30
00:01:06,090 --> 00:01:08,260
The train museum's looking for a docent.
31
00:01:08,270 --> 00:01:09,499
What's a docent?
32
00:01:09,500 --> 00:01:11,049
It's a person in a museum
33
00:01:11,050 --> 00:01:13,060
who gives informationon the exhibits.
34
00:01:14,050 --> 00:01:16,479
Do you think they'd let
someone your age do that?
35
00:01:16,480 --> 00:01:18,789
Why not? I have a high school diploma.
36
00:01:18,790 --> 00:01:19,969
True.
37
00:01:19,970 --> 00:01:21,970
I know more about trains than anybody.
38
00:01:21,980 --> 00:01:23,149
True.
39
00:01:23,150 --> 00:01:24,589
And I have the unique ability
40
00:01:24,590 --> 00:01:26,590
to wear people down until I get my way.
41
00:01:27,630 --> 00:01:29,460
So true.
42
00:01:33,510 --> 00:01:37,379
Hello. I understand you're
looking for a docent.
43
00:01:37,380 --> 00:01:39,519
I'm 11 years old, but you should know
44
00:01:39,520 --> 00:01:40,700
I have a high school diploma
45
00:01:40,710 --> 00:01:43,340
and I know more about
trains than anybody.
46
00:01:43,350 --> 00:01:45,739
You still sound on the fence.
47
00:01:45,740 --> 00:01:48,520
It was time to break
out my unique ability.
48
00:01:48,530 --> 00:01:51,049
Let me tell you about
every model train I own
49
00:01:51,050 --> 00:01:52,789
and what each of them means to me.
50
00:01:52,790 --> 00:01:54,569
The first locomotive I ever received...
51
00:01:54,570 --> 00:01:57,139
Wouldn't you know it,
47 short minutes later,
52
00:01:57,140 --> 00:01:58,969
I got the job.
53
00:02:10,610 --> 00:02:16,350
- Synced and corrected by VitoSilans -
-- www.Addic7ed.com --
54
00:02:17,510 --> 00:02:20,139
- You put your cleats in the truck?
- Yep.
55
00:02:20,140 --> 00:02:22,479
We should hit the road
soon. It's a long drive.
56
00:02:22,480 --> 00:02:25,470
- Okay.
- I got your lunches here.
57
00:02:25,480 --> 00:02:26,829
Extra Fruit Roll-Ups?
58
00:02:26,830 --> 00:02:28,339
- You each got two.
- Thank you.
59
00:02:28,340 --> 00:02:29,349
Thank you.
60
00:02:29,350 --> 00:02:31,780
- What time is the game?
- 12:30.
61
00:02:31,790 --> 00:02:33,419
Why are we talking about baseball
62
00:02:33,420 --> 00:02:35,220
and not my impending docent-hood?
63
00:02:35,230 --> 00:02:36,879
Who wants to tell him it's stupid?
64
00:02:36,880 --> 00:02:39,089
- Leave it alone.
- And why do they make you wear
65
00:02:39,090 --> 00:02:40,489
that goofy costume?
66
00:02:40,490 --> 00:02:43,030
Ha. They don't. This is all me.
67
00:02:43,040 --> 00:02:44,839
What do you got going on today?
68
00:02:44,840 --> 00:02:46,256
Ooh, laundry,
69
00:02:46,270 --> 00:02:48,189
grocery shopping, vacuuming.
70
00:02:48,190 --> 00:02:50,440
I might go nuts and
dust the picture frames.
71
00:02:50,450 --> 00:02:52,969
Well, nice. Everybody's
doing something they love.
72
00:02:52,970 --> 00:02:56,549
Sheldon, you sure about this?
73
00:02:56,550 --> 00:02:59,199
Yes, leave the crusts on.
74
00:02:59,200 --> 00:03:00,900
I'm a docent now.
75
00:03:02,510 --> 00:03:04,509
Thanks for bringing me.
76
00:03:04,510 --> 00:03:06,049
Hey, it got me out
of driving all the way
77
00:03:06,050 --> 00:03:08,470
to Missy's game; I
should be thanking you.
78
00:03:12,740 --> 00:03:14,659
My little knuckles
might not be cutting it.
79
00:03:14,660 --> 00:03:15,989
Would you give it a go?
80
00:03:15,990 --> 00:03:17,959
Sure.
81
00:03:17,960 --> 00:03:19,049
How's that?
82
00:03:19,050 --> 00:03:20,789
Four knocks. Bold.
83
00:03:22,230 --> 00:03:24,099
Hello, hello.
84
00:03:24,100 --> 00:03:27,669
Volunteer docent Sheldon
Cooper reporting for duty.
85
00:03:27,670 --> 00:03:29,360
Welcome aboard.
86
00:03:29,370 --> 00:03:32,540
Train nomenclature right
out of the gate. Promising.
87
00:03:35,360 --> 00:03:37,249
I like your conductor's uniform.
88
00:03:37,250 --> 00:03:40,020
You know what they say.
Dress for the job you want.
89
00:03:40,030 --> 00:03:42,059
Do I get an "ask me" button, too?
90
00:03:42,060 --> 00:03:44,719
Well, thank you for
asking, and yes, you do.
91
00:03:44,720 --> 00:03:46,939
I'll be right back.
92
00:03:46,940 --> 00:03:48,509
Do you see that bell?
93
00:03:48,510 --> 00:03:51,799
That's from Texas and New
Orleans locomotive number 701.
94
00:03:51,800 --> 00:03:53,669
I'd tell you more, but
you haven't contributed
95
00:03:53,670 --> 00:03:55,090
the suggested donation.
96
00:04:03,230 --> 00:04:07,049
Number 701 was built in 1930by
the Baldwin Locomotive Works.
97
00:04:07,050 --> 00:04:10,359
It was a superheated 4-8-4 class GS-1
98
00:04:10,360 --> 00:04:12,359
- with 7...
- I want my money back.
99
00:04:12,360 --> 00:04:13,759
Here you go.
100
00:04:13,760 --> 00:04:15,309
Thank you.
101
00:04:15,310 --> 00:04:17,159
I know you're supposed
to pick me up at 4:00,
102
00:04:17,160 --> 00:04:18,409
but I may live here now.
103
00:04:18,410 --> 00:04:20,330
Send me a Christmas card.
104
00:04:21,370 --> 00:04:23,679
I'm glad Mom didn't come.
105
00:04:23,680 --> 00:04:24,899
Why's that?
106
00:04:24,900 --> 00:04:26,860
I can spit when I'm on the mound.
107
00:04:27,600 --> 00:04:29,589
You can hock up anything you want today.
108
00:04:30,600 --> 00:04:33,119
- Not here.
- Aw.
109
00:04:33,120 --> 00:04:35,190
We need to stop so I can pee.
110
00:04:35,200 --> 00:04:37,459
I told you to pee
before we left the house.
111
00:04:37,460 --> 00:04:39,519
That was an hour and a half ago.
112
00:04:39,520 --> 00:04:41,480
Can't you hold it?
113
00:04:41,490 --> 00:04:43,119
I may spit like a man,
114
00:04:43,120 --> 00:04:45,060
but I have the bladder of a little girl.
115
00:04:49,980 --> 00:04:51,289
I'm going to work.
116
00:04:51,290 --> 00:04:53,379
Okay, have fun.
117
00:04:53,380 --> 00:04:55,729
What-what time do you
think you'll be back?
118
00:04:55,730 --> 00:04:56,949
Before dinner.
119
00:04:56,950 --> 00:04:58,610
See you then.
120
00:05:05,930 --> 00:05:08,659
And my day off begins.
121
00:05:08,660 --> 00:05:10,950
Just let me know if
you have any questions.
122
00:05:13,030 --> 00:05:15,010
This is a very nice builder's plate.
123
00:05:15,020 --> 00:05:16,840
How can you be sure it's not a replica?
124
00:05:16,850 --> 00:05:18,759
Now, that is a great question.
125
00:05:18,760 --> 00:05:21,739
Thank you. I also know
the answer. Do you?
126
00:05:21,740 --> 00:05:25,309
Well, there's, uh, rust
and soot on the back of it
127
00:05:25,310 --> 00:05:28,479
from when it was mounted
to the engine's smokebox.
128
00:05:28,480 --> 00:05:30,879
Very good.
129
00:05:30,880 --> 00:05:32,770
Ah, the 1937
130
00:05:32,780 --> 00:05:34,599
Santa Fe diesel.
131
00:05:34,600 --> 00:05:36,299
I've always loved that paint scheme.
132
00:05:36,300 --> 00:05:38,579
I wonder if they had a name for it.
133
00:05:38,580 --> 00:05:40,230
Cat's Whiskers.
134
00:05:40,240 --> 00:05:41,260
Correct.
135
00:05:41,270 --> 00:05:42,689
Ha! Two for two.
136
00:05:42,690 --> 00:05:44,229
Did you know that the word "train"
137
00:05:44,230 --> 00:05:45,792
comes from the French verb traîner,
138
00:05:45,793 --> 00:05:47,729
which means to draw or drag?
139
00:05:47,730 --> 00:05:50,030
Well, I just learned something.
140
00:05:50,040 --> 00:05:51,690
Well, if you enjoy learning things,
141
00:05:51,700 --> 00:05:54,859
then you and I are on the
fast track to friendship.
142
00:05:54,860 --> 00:05:56,089
Speaking of fast tracks,
143
00:05:56,090 --> 00:05:58,540
the Japanese bullet
train, or Shinkansen...
144
00:06:13,660 --> 00:06:15,139
Ready to roll?
145
00:06:15,140 --> 00:06:17,100
Not really.
146
00:06:18,170 --> 00:06:19,650
What's wrong?
147
00:06:20,600 --> 00:06:22,430
It happened.
148
00:06:23,290 --> 00:06:25,379
What happened?
149
00:06:25,380 --> 00:06:30,509
That thing that happens to girls
150
00:06:30,510 --> 00:06:33,210
when they're becoming young ladies.
151
00:06:34,850 --> 00:06:37,109
What? Now?
152
00:06:37,110 --> 00:06:39,250
I'm not happy about it, either.
153
00:06:40,570 --> 00:06:42,090
Should we go home?
154
00:06:42,100 --> 00:06:43,709
I'm pitching in an hour.
155
00:06:43,710 --> 00:06:45,429
I... you think that's a good idea?
156
00:06:45,430 --> 00:06:46,600
Maybe you need to lie down.
157
00:06:46,610 --> 00:06:47,779
I don't need to lie down.
158
00:06:47,780 --> 00:06:49,950
Okay, well, maybe I need to lie down.
159
00:06:56,660 --> 00:06:59,009
Okay, we're gonna find a pay
phone and call your mother.
160
00:06:59,010 --> 00:07:00,799
She's not here right
now. What can she do?
161
00:07:00,800 --> 00:07:02,839
Well, I don't know what to do.
162
00:07:02,840 --> 00:07:05,449
We're gonna go to a
drugstore and get what I need.
163
00:07:05,450 --> 00:07:07,449
Go to a drug store.
164
00:07:07,450 --> 00:07:09,499
Okay, I can do that.
165
00:07:09,500 --> 00:07:12,190
Breathe. We're gonna get through this.
166
00:07:15,460 --> 00:07:16,979
It's almost opening time.
167
00:07:16,980 --> 00:07:18,329
Can I flip the sign?
168
00:07:18,330 --> 00:07:19,420
Have at it.
169
00:07:23,510 --> 00:07:26,030
Five, four,
170
00:07:26,040 --> 00:07:29,519
three, two, one.
171
00:07:29,520 --> 00:07:31,800
We're officially open for business.
172
00:07:38,880 --> 00:07:41,220
Anticlimactic.
173
00:07:47,780 --> 00:07:50,130
Get him, Dalton. Get him.
174
00:07:51,540 --> 00:07:52,769
Mary Cooper,
175
00:07:52,770 --> 00:07:54,499
what are you doing?
176
00:07:54,500 --> 00:07:55,539
Nothing.
177
00:07:55,540 --> 00:07:57,239
Why are you watching Road House?
178
00:07:57,240 --> 00:07:59,009
Why aren't you at work?
179
00:07:59,010 --> 00:08:00,629
I asked you first, and my question
180
00:08:00,630 --> 00:08:01,940
is way more interesting.
181
00:08:03,030 --> 00:08:04,590
It was just on.
182
00:08:04,600 --> 00:08:06,119
I don't even know what that is.
183
00:08:06,120 --> 00:08:08,560
Then how'd you know his name's Dalton?
184
00:08:10,120 --> 00:08:12,469
I don't have to explain myself to you.
185
00:08:12,470 --> 00:08:14,079
This is a pretty dirty movie.
186
00:08:14,080 --> 00:08:17,219
How do you know? It is rated R.
187
00:08:17,220 --> 00:08:19,389
For violence, language
and sexual content.
188
00:08:19,390 --> 00:08:22,050
You should be ashamed of yourself.
189
00:08:26,290 --> 00:08:28,320
Nothing to be embarrassed about.
190
00:08:28,330 --> 00:08:30,299
It's perfectly natural.
Perfectly normal.
191
00:08:30,300 --> 00:08:31,799
Dad, I know.
192
00:08:31,800 --> 00:08:33,409
I'm telling myself.
193
00:08:33,410 --> 00:08:35,579
Uh...
194
00:08:35,580 --> 00:08:37,669
How much money you need?
195
00:08:37,670 --> 00:08:39,670
I'm not going in there. You are.
196
00:08:39,680 --> 00:08:42,090
Why can't you go? It's embarrassing.
197
00:08:42,100 --> 00:08:44,389
You just said it wasn't embarrassing.
198
00:08:44,390 --> 00:08:45,910
Well, it is and I lied.
199
00:08:47,330 --> 00:08:49,249
Excuse me.
200
00:08:49,250 --> 00:08:52,379
Hello. Welcome to the
Lone Star Train Museum.
201
00:08:52,380 --> 00:08:53,900
I'm Docent Sheldon Cooper.
202
00:08:53,910 --> 00:08:55,919
If you have any questions...
203
00:08:55,920 --> 00:08:57,489
You know where the bathroom is?
204
00:08:57,490 --> 00:08:59,909
Indeed I do. You'll want to chug along
205
00:08:59,910 --> 00:09:01,909
past our authentic 1928
206
00:09:01,910 --> 00:09:04,209
Southern Pacific Sunset limited whistle,
207
00:09:04,210 --> 00:09:06,319
then keep going past
our conductor's uniform,
208
00:09:06,320 --> 00:09:08,399
which was worn on the
Texas and Pacific Railway.
209
00:09:08,400 --> 00:09:09,439
Then you'll come upon...
210
00:09:09,440 --> 00:09:11,399
Son, I have to take a leak.
211
00:09:11,400 --> 00:09:13,580
- It's in the back.
- Thank you.
212
00:09:13,590 --> 00:09:15,839
And our toilets flush,
unlike the ones on trains
213
00:09:15,840 --> 00:09:17,889
before 1889.
214
00:09:19,850 --> 00:09:21,580
This is a genuinelocomotive bell
215
00:09:21,590 --> 00:09:24,360
from Texas and New Orleans number 701.
216
00:09:24,370 --> 00:09:26,939
Now there's a proper technique
to make the purest sound.
217
00:09:26,940 --> 00:09:28,379
Most people don't know how to do that.
218
00:09:28,380 --> 00:09:30,029
But you're in luck, because I do.
219
00:09:38,270 --> 00:09:40,120
You want to know more
about the Cotton Belt,
220
00:09:40,130 --> 00:09:41,689
there's plenty in here.
221
00:09:41,690 --> 00:09:44,479
Although the facts in
that brochure are suspect.
222
00:09:44,480 --> 00:09:46,569
Sheldon, I, uh,
223
00:09:46,570 --> 00:09:48,450
I wrote this brochure.
224
00:09:48,460 --> 00:09:50,599
While the origins of the
Southern Pacific go back
225
00:09:50,600 --> 00:09:54,550
to 1848, the company wasn't
formally started until 1865.
226
00:09:55,940 --> 00:09:58,849
And before you reprint
these, we should talk fonts.
227
00:10:00,970 --> 00:10:03,149
See? It's all in the wrist.
228
00:10:06,280 --> 00:10:08,499
And early trains used
the drop chute toilet,
229
00:10:08,500 --> 00:10:11,419
also called the hopper toilet,
which was really just a hole...
230
00:10:11,420 --> 00:10:14,460
Couldn't you just
listen to this all day?
231
00:10:22,020 --> 00:10:24,689
So how many times have
you seen Road House?
232
00:10:24,690 --> 00:10:27,170
Sorry, can't hear you.
233
00:10:27,180 --> 00:10:28,699
More or less than five?
234
00:10:28,700 --> 00:10:30,268
'Cause that'show many
times I've seen it.
235
00:10:30,270 --> 00:10:32,329
That's how many years
you're gonna be grounded
236
00:10:32,330 --> 00:10:34,129
if you don't drop it right now.
237
00:10:34,130 --> 00:10:35,959
Does Dad know you like this movie?
238
00:10:37,100 --> 00:10:39,789
No, and it is gonna stay that way.
239
00:10:39,790 --> 00:10:42,319
- Why?
- Because it is not
240
00:10:42,320 --> 00:10:44,059
something I should be watching.
241
00:10:44,060 --> 00:10:45,670
Then why are you watching it?
242
00:10:47,590 --> 00:10:51,109
It is a guilty pleasure,
so will you drop it now?
243
00:10:51,110 --> 00:10:53,239
Relax.
244
00:10:53,240 --> 00:10:55,290
I ain't gonna tell nobody.
245
00:10:57,730 --> 00:10:58,939
Thank you.
246
00:10:58,940 --> 00:11:01,340
I think it's awesome you like it.
247
00:11:04,690 --> 00:11:06,420
It is pretty cool how Dalton
248
00:11:06,430 --> 00:11:08,019
doesn't drive his Mercedes to the bar
249
00:11:08,020 --> 00:11:10,039
'cause he knows they're gonna trash it.
250
00:11:10,040 --> 00:11:11,299
Dalton's no dummy.
251
00:11:11,300 --> 00:11:12,809
No, sir.
252
00:11:12,810 --> 00:11:14,590
It's right over there in aisle two.
253
00:11:17,750 --> 00:11:19,429
Find everything you need today?
254
00:11:19,430 --> 00:11:20,960
Yeah, think so.
255
00:11:34,070 --> 00:11:36,589
You don't know what
you're doing, do you?
256
00:11:36,590 --> 00:11:38,419
No, ma'am.
257
00:11:38,420 --> 00:11:39,810
Would you like some help?
258
00:11:39,820 --> 00:11:41,159
Yes, ma'am, thank you, ma'am.
259
00:11:41,160 --> 00:11:43,120
Okay.
260
00:11:48,080 --> 00:11:49,909
Uh...
261
00:11:49,910 --> 00:11:51,100
we need to talk.
262
00:11:51,110 --> 00:11:52,999
About this bell? You got it.
263
00:11:53,000 --> 00:11:55,829
Did you know different
engineers would often...
264
00:11:55,830 --> 00:11:57,780
Son?
265
00:11:57,790 --> 00:12:00,000
You're a sweet kid, but...
266
00:12:00,010 --> 00:12:01,879
I don't think this is working out.
267
00:12:01,880 --> 00:12:03,460
What? Why?
268
00:12:03,470 --> 00:12:05,579
I-I know everything there
is to know about trains.
269
00:12:05,580 --> 00:12:07,969
Well, you see now, that
there is the problem.
270
00:12:07,970 --> 00:12:10,920
People, when they come
here, they want to enjoy it.
271
00:12:10,930 --> 00:12:13,140
They don't want to get
lectured in the bathroom.
272
00:12:13,150 --> 00:12:15,099
And you have been correcting me
273
00:12:15,100 --> 00:12:17,199
in front of the visitors
all morning long.
274
00:12:17,200 --> 00:12:18,810
Would you prefer I send you a memo
275
00:12:18,820 --> 00:12:20,199
of your mistakes at the end of the day?
276
00:12:20,200 --> 00:12:21,329
- No.
- Because that's what I did
277
00:12:21,330 --> 00:12:22,429
for the teachers at my school.
278
00:12:22,430 --> 00:12:23,799
I think it brought us all closer.
279
00:12:23,800 --> 00:12:25,239
Sheldon, it's great to have knowledge.
280
00:12:25,240 --> 00:12:28,109
But you don't need to
show it off all the time.
281
00:12:28,110 --> 00:12:29,639
Oh, I don't mind.
282
00:12:31,120 --> 00:12:34,470
You see, trains are all
about balance, right?
283
00:12:34,480 --> 00:12:36,609
Now you put too much
water into a steam engine,
284
00:12:36,610 --> 00:12:37,929
it can't do its job.
285
00:12:37,930 --> 00:12:40,829
You let that water run
low... Boom, it'll blow up.
286
00:12:40,830 --> 00:12:43,260
Now, a good engineer
287
00:12:43,270 --> 00:12:45,789
makes sure he uses just
the right amount of water.
288
00:12:45,790 --> 00:12:48,229
Not too little, not too much.
289
00:12:48,230 --> 00:12:50,710
That make sense?
290
00:12:51,490 --> 00:12:53,839
The fireman adjusts the
water, not the engineer.
291
00:12:53,840 --> 00:12:55,959
And then he took my "ask me" button.
292
00:12:55,960 --> 00:12:58,110
He didn't even ask me. He just took it.
293
00:13:04,810 --> 00:13:07,589
Everybody gets fired
for something eventually.
294
00:13:07,590 --> 00:13:09,639
For being too goodat their job?
295
00:13:09,640 --> 00:13:12,029
Well, Moon Pie, sometimes you just get
296
00:13:12,030 --> 00:13:15,599
too excited about sharing
the facts in your head.
297
00:13:15,600 --> 00:13:18,129
But learning facts is the ant's pants.
298
00:13:18,130 --> 00:13:19,779
Which is the Australian derivation
299
00:13:19,780 --> 00:13:21,119
of the bee's knees.
300
00:13:21,120 --> 00:13:22,549
See, you just learned something.
301
00:13:22,550 --> 00:13:24,699
And wasn't that the cat's pajamas?
302
00:13:24,700 --> 00:13:27,959
Alls I'm saying is people
aren't always in the mood.
303
00:13:27,960 --> 00:13:29,569
Well, they should be.
304
00:13:29,570 --> 00:13:31,879
I'm happy to learnany fact at any time.
305
00:13:31,880 --> 00:13:33,310
Is that so?
306
00:13:33,320 --> 00:13:35,660
Yes.
307
00:13:35,670 --> 00:13:37,319
Grab my knitting bag.
308
00:13:37,320 --> 00:13:39,520
I don't recommend
driving while knitting.
309
00:13:39,530 --> 00:13:41,239
Your reflexes aren't
what they used to be.
310
00:13:41,240 --> 00:13:43,320
Just look in the bag!
311
00:13:43,330 --> 00:13:44,930
Did you know
312
00:13:44,940 --> 00:13:47,459
that there are three
different kinds of yarn?
313
00:13:47,460 --> 00:13:48,589
I didn't.
314
00:13:48,590 --> 00:13:51,769
You got your animal, like wool.
315
00:13:51,770 --> 00:13:53,379
Your plant, like cotton.
316
00:13:53,380 --> 00:13:55,819
And your synthetic, like acrylic.
317
00:13:55,820 --> 00:13:56,949
Interesting.
318
00:13:56,950 --> 00:13:58,299
You think so?
319
00:13:58,300 --> 00:13:59,379
I'm glad to hear that.
320
00:13:59,380 --> 00:14:02,709
Because each one of them
has plusses and minuses,
321
00:14:02,710 --> 00:14:04,928
and you're about to hear them all
322
00:14:04,930 --> 00:14:08,090
in mind-numbing detail.
323
00:14:12,520 --> 00:14:13,879
Nothing to worry about.
324
00:14:13,880 --> 00:14:16,009
- We got this.
- Really?
325
00:14:16,010 --> 00:14:17,400
Everything you need's right here.
326
00:14:18,450 --> 00:14:20,190
You're the best.
327
00:14:21,230 --> 00:14:23,189
Come on, I'll show you
where the bathroom is.
328
00:14:23,190 --> 00:14:24,989
Oh, and there's a very helpful cashier
329
00:14:24,990 --> 00:14:26,369
named Gretchen you need to hug.
330
00:14:26,370 --> 00:14:27,540
Come on.
331
00:14:28,260 --> 00:14:29,629
Here she is, Gretchen.
332
00:14:29,630 --> 00:14:31,589
Another way
333
00:14:31,590 --> 00:14:34,079
to cast on in knitting
334
00:14:34,080 --> 00:14:35,859
is called the slingshot.
335
00:14:35,860 --> 00:14:37,729
Did you know the
Wham-O company was named
336
00:14:37,730 --> 00:14:39,949
after its first product,
the Wham-O Slingshot?
337
00:14:39,950 --> 00:14:42,599
I'm the one saying the facts right now.
338
00:14:42,600 --> 00:14:44,599
Unless you're tired of hearing them?
339
00:14:44,600 --> 00:14:46,369
Sick of learning? Never.
340
00:14:46,370 --> 00:14:48,339
Well, that's too bad.
341
00:14:48,340 --> 00:14:51,479
How awesome was it when he
fights those four guys at once?
342
00:14:51,480 --> 00:14:53,440
They were asking for it.
343
00:14:53,456 --> 00:14:55,439
Dalton doesn't fight unless he has to.
344
00:14:55,440 --> 00:14:57,059
True, 'cause when the doctor says,
345
00:14:57,060 --> 00:14:58,969
"How many of these fights
you win?" he says...
346
00:14:58,970 --> 00:15:00,920
Nobody ever wins in a fight.
347
00:15:03,930 --> 00:15:06,759
Mm, and I like how smart he is.
348
00:15:06,760 --> 00:15:08,720
But doesn't feel like
he has to show it off.
349
00:15:08,730 --> 00:15:09,769
No kidding.
350
00:15:09,770 --> 00:15:11,320
Maybe Sheldon should watch it.
351
00:15:11,330 --> 00:15:15,020
Hey, what was Dalton's third
rule of being a good bouncer?
352
00:15:15,030 --> 00:15:16,769
Be nice.
353
00:15:16,770 --> 00:15:18,330
That's right.
354
00:15:20,770 --> 00:15:23,249
I think Dad would love that
you're into stuff like this.
355
00:15:23,250 --> 00:15:25,079
I'm sure he would.
356
00:15:25,080 --> 00:15:27,559
He took me to see Mad Max twice.
357
00:15:27,560 --> 00:15:28,689
Really?
358
00:15:28,690 --> 00:15:30,299
Actually...
359
00:15:30,300 --> 00:15:32,749
the second time, we
couldn't find a sitter,
360
00:15:32,750 --> 00:15:34,259
so we brought you along.
361
00:15:34,260 --> 00:15:35,780
How old was I?
362
00:15:35,790 --> 00:15:37,959
I don't know... four?
363
00:15:37,960 --> 00:15:39,919
No wonder I'm so cool.
364
00:15:39,920 --> 00:15:42,050
So, why you hiding it?
365
00:15:42,990 --> 00:15:46,169
Well, 'cause I'm supposed
to be a good Christian.
366
00:15:46,170 --> 00:15:49,259
Clearly this is something
I need to work on.
367
00:15:49,260 --> 00:15:53,149
Well, before you fix it,
you've got to watch Die Hard 2.
368
00:15:53,150 --> 00:15:56,370
Bruce Willis stabs a guy
in the head with an icicle.
369
00:15:58,370 --> 00:16:02,850
Now, circular knitting
produces a seamless tube.
370
00:16:02,860 --> 00:16:04,729
You already told me that.
371
00:16:04,730 --> 00:16:06,989
Oh, did I?
372
00:16:06,990 --> 00:16:09,169
Can we circle back to
double-pointed needles?
373
00:16:09,170 --> 00:16:10,819
I have a follow-up question.
374
00:16:10,820 --> 00:16:12,820
Hold that thought.
375
00:16:20,140 --> 00:16:22,349
Strike two!
376
00:16:22,350 --> 00:16:24,139
One more!
377
00:16:24,140 --> 00:16:25,970
Just like that!
378
00:16:30,610 --> 00:16:32,269
Strike three, you're out.
379
00:16:32,270 --> 00:16:34,319
There you go! Ha!
380
00:16:34,320 --> 00:16:36,149
That's how you do it!
381
00:16:36,150 --> 00:16:37,499
Is that your little girl?
382
00:16:37,500 --> 00:16:39,500
That's my little lady.
383
00:16:45,030 --> 00:16:46,720
Well, sometimes.
384
00:16:53,140 --> 00:16:56,479
Carrying the stuffing out of the
Caddy was easy. Using it to stop
385
00:16:56,480 --> 00:16:58,909
- the guys chasing us...
- The kids are asleep.
386
00:16:58,910 --> 00:17:00,560
Gasoline would help.
387
00:17:00,570 --> 00:17:02,520
- Always does...
- You gonna watch that?
388
00:17:02,530 --> 00:17:03,959
Well, it's MacGyver.
389
00:17:03,960 --> 00:17:06,049
He makes stuff out of other stuff.
390
00:17:06,050 --> 00:17:07,789
Sort of a homemade mortar.
391
00:17:07,790 --> 00:17:09,749
Why, did you want to
watch something else?
392
00:17:09,750 --> 00:17:13,010
I thought maybe we could watch a movie.
393
00:17:14,100 --> 00:17:16,149
Sure, yeah, which one?
394
00:17:16,150 --> 00:17:18,890
Um... I don't know.
395
00:17:19,980 --> 00:17:22,199
I heard that that movie Road House
396
00:17:22,200 --> 00:17:23,939
is supposed to be good.
397
00:17:23,940 --> 00:17:25,499
What's it about?
398
00:17:25,500 --> 00:17:27,990
I think it's about a guy,
399
00:17:28,000 --> 00:17:30,768
um... Dalton.
400
00:17:30,770 --> 00:17:32,589
Who's a bouncer
401
00:17:32,590 --> 00:17:34,329
who has to clean up a bar
402
00:17:34,330 --> 00:17:37,120
that's been overrun
by a bunch of bad guys.
403
00:17:37,130 --> 00:17:39,740
Oh, yeah, it's got that guy
that looks like Georgie in it.
404
00:17:39,750 --> 00:17:41,210
No, he doesn't.
405
00:17:41,220 --> 00:17:42,779
Are you kidding?
406
00:17:42,780 --> 00:17:44,430
He looks exactly like him.
407
00:17:50,930 --> 00:17:52,929
Let's just watch MacGyver.
408
00:17:52,930 --> 00:17:54,580
Cool.
409
00:17:55,970 --> 00:18:02,240
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