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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:22,693 --> 00:00:25,943 ♫ When I see you there 2 00:00:27,290 --> 00:00:30,373 ♫ Lost in a magazine 3 00:00:32,328 --> 00:00:36,161 ♫ Every day the same old same 4 00:00:42,063 --> 00:00:45,980 ♫ I think about the early days 5 00:00:47,073 --> 00:00:50,740 ♫ When you were all over me 6 00:00:52,111 --> 00:00:55,749 ♫ Now we hardly kiss 7 00:00:55,749 --> 00:00:58,332 ♫ Where are we 8 00:01:02,016 --> 00:01:05,349 ♫ I tried to understand 9 00:01:06,719 --> 00:01:10,219 ♫ But you're too far away 10 00:01:11,967 --> 00:01:15,612 ♫ Floating in the stars 11 00:01:15,612 --> 00:01:18,279 ♫ Night and day 12 00:01:21,506 --> 00:01:25,304 ♫ Your body is here 13 00:01:25,304 --> 00:01:29,137 ♫ But your mind is high above 14 00:01:31,567 --> 00:01:35,734 ♫ I want you to be near me my love 15 00:01:37,533 --> 00:01:41,700 ♫ Oh Lydia, come back to me before it's too late 16 00:01:46,578 --> 00:01:48,828 ♫ Oh Lydia 17 00:01:50,510 --> 00:01:54,677 ♫ Don't let the love turn into hate 18 00:01:56,465 --> 00:01:59,715 ♫ Listen to me my love 19 00:02:00,619 --> 00:02:04,119 ♫ I'm a man, I have needs 20 00:02:06,513 --> 00:02:10,263 ♫ Oh Lydia, come back please 21 00:02:42,484 --> 00:02:43,317 - Goddamn. 22 00:03:00,163 --> 00:03:02,830 The neighbors are rolling again. 23 00:03:08,020 --> 00:03:10,270 - Those people are so sick. 24 00:03:11,604 --> 00:03:13,687 Harry look, look at this. 25 00:03:14,612 --> 00:03:16,362 Another UFO sighting. 26 00:03:19,433 --> 00:03:23,052 It says they are trying to establish a contact with us, 27 00:03:23,052 --> 00:03:24,957 do you know that? 28 00:03:24,957 --> 00:03:29,866 - So why don't they land on the parking lot of NASA? 29 00:03:29,866 --> 00:03:32,306 - Let's not start this again please. 30 00:03:32,306 --> 00:03:36,473 I'm really not in the mood for your cosmic snobbery tonight. 31 00:03:39,066 --> 00:03:41,247 What are you doing? 32 00:03:41,247 --> 00:03:42,997 - I'm turning you on. 33 00:03:51,768 --> 00:03:54,518 - This is what turns me on honey. 34 00:03:58,368 --> 00:04:01,452 - When was the last time we made love? 35 00:04:01,452 --> 00:04:02,952 - Four months ago. 36 00:04:05,263 --> 00:04:07,180 But I'm busy right now. 37 00:04:35,244 --> 00:04:37,744 - The whole world is screwing. 38 00:04:40,181 --> 00:04:42,098 But Harry Smith, ain't. 39 00:04:54,329 --> 00:04:56,509 - Ouch, stupid stump. 40 00:05:05,932 --> 00:05:07,272 - Is that you Meg? 41 00:05:07,272 --> 00:05:08,522 - No, it's E.T. 42 00:05:09,378 --> 00:05:11,191 Got a minute, I wanna show you something? 43 00:05:11,191 --> 00:05:12,441 - Yeah come in. 44 00:05:14,739 --> 00:05:15,572 - Tada! 45 00:05:17,980 --> 00:05:20,593 Drives my Victor wild. 46 00:05:20,593 --> 00:05:21,887 What do you think. 47 00:05:21,887 --> 00:05:26,462 - Does the word subtle mean anything to you? 48 00:05:26,462 --> 00:05:27,629 - Oh hi Harry. 49 00:05:28,531 --> 00:05:30,698 - Hi gorgeous, high heels. 50 00:05:31,959 --> 00:05:33,694 First thing in the morning? 51 00:05:33,694 --> 00:05:35,402 - That's my second thing. 52 00:05:35,402 --> 00:05:38,057 - Oh, what's your first thing? 53 00:05:38,057 --> 00:05:39,307 Bumping uglies? 54 00:05:40,285 --> 00:05:43,283 - You bet sweetheart, I can see you're in a great mood 55 00:05:43,283 --> 00:05:46,835 today, what did you do, sleep in a tree? 56 00:05:46,835 --> 00:05:51,002 - A saucer ran into my bedroom kept me up all night. 57 00:05:56,070 --> 00:06:00,593 - Meg, how can you make love every single day? 58 00:06:00,593 --> 00:06:01,885 - Twice a day. 59 00:06:01,885 --> 00:06:04,294 - Pardon me, twice a day, God. 60 00:06:04,294 --> 00:06:08,433 - It's fine, one day I'm gonna die screwing. 61 00:06:08,433 --> 00:06:09,603 - And don't forget the high heels, 62 00:06:09,603 --> 00:06:10,911 five inches no less. 63 00:06:10,911 --> 00:06:12,980 - Hey let me tell you something, women who don't wear 64 00:06:12,980 --> 00:06:16,813 high heels, ain't no women, those are females. 65 00:06:18,317 --> 00:06:21,208 - Look, what I found in this article. 66 00:06:21,208 --> 00:06:23,575 An extraterrestrial woman took an American Senator 67 00:06:23,575 --> 00:06:24,992 on her spaceship. 68 00:06:26,157 --> 00:06:30,305 Oh perhaps this one is more for you, she had sex with him. 69 00:06:30,305 --> 00:06:34,108 - Sex with a Senator, what a broad. 70 00:06:34,108 --> 00:06:36,181 Well why didn't she do an astronaut, I mean, 71 00:06:36,181 --> 00:06:38,318 they've got space training. 72 00:06:38,318 --> 00:06:41,331 - This is so fascinating. 73 00:06:41,331 --> 00:06:43,532 - What are you staring at Harry? 74 00:06:43,532 --> 00:06:46,674 - One of these days, I'm gonna grab those magazines 75 00:06:46,674 --> 00:06:49,341 and ram them into the fireplace. 76 00:06:58,979 --> 00:07:02,739 - You better watch it dear, because while Senators 77 00:07:02,739 --> 00:07:05,503 are screwing aliens, your Harry just might start screwing 78 00:07:05,503 --> 00:07:07,151 some local bimbo. 79 00:07:07,151 --> 00:07:10,754 - My Harry? 80 00:07:10,754 --> 00:07:11,754 I think not. 81 00:07:12,743 --> 00:07:14,760 - Don't flatter yourself. 82 00:07:14,760 --> 00:07:16,093 - Oh Meg please. 83 00:07:18,541 --> 00:07:20,458 My Harry, no way, pfft. 84 00:07:22,146 --> 00:07:24,551 - Let me tell you, that club of yours in Hollywood 85 00:07:24,551 --> 00:07:25,801 has 1,000 ways. 86 00:07:27,402 --> 00:07:30,235 - I'm scared, I gotta get dressed. 87 00:07:31,250 --> 00:07:32,833 There's 1,000 ways? 88 00:07:33,722 --> 00:07:35,972 - Okay uhm, I gotta go now. 89 00:07:38,600 --> 00:07:40,713 - Because she abducted the Senator. 90 00:07:40,713 --> 00:07:42,241 - What? 91 00:07:42,241 --> 00:07:46,268 - Abducted, kidnapped, it's happened to lots of people. 92 00:07:46,268 --> 00:07:48,268 - Oh I see, damn aliens. 93 00:07:51,264 --> 00:07:53,723 Why are they abducting humans? 94 00:07:53,723 --> 00:07:56,857 - Research, they're studying us, you know they can 95 00:07:56,857 --> 00:08:00,967 rip your body apart, put it back together, 96 00:08:00,967 --> 00:08:05,295 drop you back on Earth, and nobody would ever tell. 97 00:08:05,295 --> 00:08:06,378 It's amazing. 98 00:08:07,639 --> 00:08:08,472 - I'd sue. 99 00:09:00,063 --> 00:09:02,067 - Oh this girl from the ad is coming in today 100 00:09:02,067 --> 00:09:06,026 around 12 o'clock, she has funny name, I forgot. 101 00:09:06,026 --> 00:09:08,109 But she'll be here at 12. 102 00:09:38,015 --> 00:09:41,314 ♫ Something is in his eyes 103 00:09:41,314 --> 00:09:44,784 ♫ They glow and galvanize 104 00:09:44,784 --> 00:09:48,951 ♫ There's a single beam, it makes me scream for sex 105 00:09:52,223 --> 00:09:55,400 ♫ Didn't move from his place 106 00:09:55,400 --> 00:09:58,961 ♫ So I could see it on his face 107 00:09:58,961 --> 00:10:03,128 ♫ He is inside, it's a bonafide perplex 108 00:10:05,876 --> 00:10:07,709 ♫ Wow 109 00:10:11,972 --> 00:10:15,492 ♫ He's got the power in his glowing eyes 110 00:10:15,492 --> 00:10:19,357 ♫ He's melted me like the sun melts ice 111 00:10:19,357 --> 00:10:22,876 ♫ If he looks at you then you'll be next 112 00:10:22,876 --> 00:10:26,626 ♫ Get ready for the wild sex 113 00:10:32,894 --> 00:10:35,988 ♫ I never felt this way before 114 00:10:35,988 --> 00:10:39,815 ♫ He's gone all the way to my core 115 00:10:39,815 --> 00:10:43,470 ♫ I'm coming soon, it's a monsoon, wild sex 116 00:11:03,690 --> 00:11:05,023 - Hey, hey, hey. 117 00:11:05,950 --> 00:11:07,789 How's it going man. 118 00:11:07,789 --> 00:11:08,789 - The usual. 119 00:11:10,073 --> 00:11:11,573 - Thank you Harry. 120 00:11:12,480 --> 00:11:14,433 - So how's the balloon business? 121 00:11:14,433 --> 00:11:17,139 - Excellent, excellent, I just bought a new one, 122 00:11:17,139 --> 00:11:19,114 huge black sucker. 123 00:11:19,114 --> 00:11:20,190 I named it Satan. 124 00:11:22,344 --> 00:11:24,290 Tourists are gonna love it. 125 00:11:24,290 --> 00:11:25,373 How's Olivia? 126 00:11:30,588 --> 00:11:32,671 Still hooked on the UFOs? 127 00:11:34,138 --> 00:11:36,388 - Still hooked on the UFOs. 128 00:11:38,677 --> 00:11:40,760 - That's bad, that's bad. 129 00:11:44,668 --> 00:11:47,168 How are things in the bedroom? 130 00:11:53,400 --> 00:11:54,817 Ice on the rocks. 131 00:12:01,130 --> 00:12:05,104 You know something Harry, most women don't wanna have sex, 132 00:12:05,104 --> 00:12:08,958 they wanna have rights, that's why most men end up having 133 00:12:08,958 --> 00:12:09,791 affairs. 134 00:12:12,374 --> 00:12:15,518 - Forget about affairs, Olivia lives with me 135 00:12:15,518 --> 00:12:18,569 and she works with me, no way. 136 00:12:18,569 --> 00:12:21,300 - I'm telling ya Harry, a lack of affairs is gonna 137 00:12:21,300 --> 00:12:23,964 ruin your marriage, you're either gonna end up 138 00:12:23,964 --> 00:12:26,381 with a mistress, or a shrink. 139 00:12:32,440 --> 00:12:34,138 ♫ Tell me what you want, tell me what you need 140 00:12:34,138 --> 00:12:36,844 ♫ Tell me what you wanna do 141 00:12:36,844 --> 00:12:38,403 ♫ I'll give you anything that you want 142 00:12:38,403 --> 00:12:41,668 ♫ If you want me to 143 00:12:41,668 --> 00:12:43,621 ♫ Tell me what you want, tell me what you need 144 00:12:43,621 --> 00:12:44,905 ♫ Tell me what you wanna do 145 00:12:44,905 --> 00:12:46,905 - Representative of God. 146 00:12:52,900 --> 00:12:55,623 - She must be here for the job opening. 147 00:12:55,623 --> 00:12:58,296 ♫ You look so fine 148 00:12:58,296 --> 00:13:01,046 ♫ Oh, oh, oh, oh 149 00:13:02,613 --> 00:13:06,363 ♫ Oh yeah, won't you be mine 150 00:13:26,697 --> 00:13:28,481 ♫ Tell me what you want, tell me what you need 151 00:13:28,481 --> 00:13:31,406 ♫ Tell me what you wanna do 152 00:13:31,406 --> 00:13:33,065 ♫ I'll give you everything that you want 153 00:13:33,065 --> 00:13:36,094 ♫ If you want me to 154 00:13:36,094 --> 00:13:38,128 ♫ Tell me what you want, tell me what you need 155 00:13:38,128 --> 00:13:40,837 ♫ Tell me what you wanna do 156 00:13:40,837 --> 00:13:42,743 ♫ I'll give you everything that you want 157 00:13:42,743 --> 00:13:45,576 ♫ If you want me to 158 00:13:45,576 --> 00:13:47,442 ♫ Tell me what you want, tell me what you need 159 00:13:47,442 --> 00:13:50,398 ♫ Tell me what you wanna do 160 00:13:50,398 --> 00:13:52,008 ♫ I'll give you everything that you want 161 00:13:52,008 --> 00:13:55,018 ♫ If you want me to 162 00:13:55,018 --> 00:13:56,885 ♫ Tell me what you want, tell me what you need 163 00:13:56,885 --> 00:13:59,805 ♫ Tell me what you wanna do 164 00:13:59,805 --> 00:14:01,457 ♫ I'll give you everything that you want 165 00:14:01,457 --> 00:14:03,701 ♫ If you want me to 166 00:14:03,701 --> 00:14:05,677 ♫ Hmm, baby 167 00:14:05,677 --> 00:14:09,844 ♫ Now tell me what you want, yeah 168 00:14:11,562 --> 00:14:13,543 ♫ Tell me what you want, tell me what you need 169 00:14:13,543 --> 00:14:16,288 ♫ Tell me what you wanna do 170 00:14:16,288 --> 00:14:18,447 ♫ I'll give you everything that you want 171 00:14:18,447 --> 00:14:21,145 ♫ If you want me to 172 00:14:21,145 --> 00:14:23,057 ♫ Tell me what you want, tell me what you need 173 00:14:23,057 --> 00:14:25,849 ♫ Tell me what you wanna do 174 00:14:25,849 --> 00:14:27,674 ♫ I'll give you everything that you want 175 00:14:27,674 --> 00:14:29,037 ♫ If you want me to 176 00:14:29,037 --> 00:14:30,950 - Double vodka please. 177 00:14:30,950 --> 00:14:32,599 ♫ Tell me what you want, tell me what you need 178 00:14:32,599 --> 00:14:35,269 ♫ Tell me what you wanna do 179 00:14:35,269 --> 00:14:37,174 ♫ I'll give you everything that you want 180 00:14:37,174 --> 00:14:39,975 ♫ If you want me to 181 00:14:39,975 --> 00:14:41,889 ♫ Tell me what you want, tell me what you need 182 00:14:41,889 --> 00:14:44,854 ♫ Tell me what you wanna do 183 00:14:44,854 --> 00:14:46,724 ♫ I'll give you everything that you want 184 00:14:46,724 --> 00:14:49,724 ♫ If you want me to 185 00:14:50,917 --> 00:14:52,667 - Straight up please. 186 00:14:54,584 --> 00:14:56,442 ♫ I'll give you everything that you want 187 00:14:56,442 --> 00:14:58,898 ♫ If you want me to 188 00:14:58,898 --> 00:15:00,968 ♫ Tell me what you want, tell me what you need 189 00:15:00,968 --> 00:15:03,634 ♫ Tell me what you wanna do 190 00:15:03,634 --> 00:15:05,712 ♫ I'll give you everything that you want 191 00:15:05,712 --> 00:15:08,487 ♫ If you want me to 192 00:15:08,487 --> 00:15:10,474 ♫ Tell me what you want, tell me what you need 193 00:15:10,474 --> 00:15:13,225 ♫ Tell me what you wanna do 194 00:15:13,225 --> 00:15:15,257 ♫ I'll give you everything that you want 195 00:15:15,257 --> 00:15:17,882 ♫ If you want me to 196 00:15:17,882 --> 00:15:20,379 ♫ Tell me what you want, tell me what you need 197 00:15:20,379 --> 00:15:22,963 ♫ Tell me what you wanna do 198 00:15:22,963 --> 00:15:24,778 ♫ I'll give you everything that you want 199 00:15:24,778 --> 00:15:27,451 ♫ If you want me to 200 00:15:27,451 --> 00:15:28,802 ♫ Tell me what you want, tell me what you need 201 00:15:28,802 --> 00:15:29,969 - Another one? 202 00:15:37,176 --> 00:15:38,176 - No thanks. 203 00:15:43,171 --> 00:15:44,858 Are you the boss? 204 00:15:44,858 --> 00:15:46,571 - I'm half the boss. 205 00:15:46,571 --> 00:15:48,654 My wife's the other half. 206 00:15:50,713 --> 00:15:54,713 - That's cute, so kind of a family business huh? 207 00:15:56,098 --> 00:16:00,015 - Family values are a top priority in this bar. 208 00:16:06,270 --> 00:16:08,020 So, what's your name? 209 00:16:10,464 --> 00:16:11,797 - Thousand Ways. 210 00:16:14,563 --> 00:16:17,311 - Excuse me, what kind of name is that? 211 00:16:17,311 --> 00:16:19,983 - It's a song, and the name of the song 212 00:16:19,983 --> 00:16:22,900 is A Thousand Ways To Have Affairs. 213 00:16:24,781 --> 00:16:27,281 - Cute, what's your real name? 214 00:16:36,253 --> 00:16:37,920 - Two Thousand Ways. 215 00:16:41,482 --> 00:16:42,315 - Cuter. 216 00:16:44,822 --> 00:16:47,034 - Gabriela Skratinova. 217 00:16:47,034 --> 00:16:47,951 - Say what? 218 00:16:49,789 --> 00:16:52,789 - Gabriela Skratinova, it's Russian. 219 00:16:54,115 --> 00:16:56,865 But I'd rather use Thousand Ways. 220 00:17:00,989 --> 00:17:02,572 - Very interesting. 221 00:17:08,558 --> 00:17:10,241 You're hired. 222 00:17:10,241 --> 00:17:13,324 - Sure, do I need to start right now? 223 00:17:17,227 --> 00:17:21,227 - Sign up with my wife first, her name's No Way. 224 00:17:31,737 --> 00:17:36,346 Actually it's Olivia, you'll find her backstage. 225 00:17:36,346 --> 00:17:39,130 - Where's the backstage? 226 00:17:39,130 --> 00:17:40,213 - Over there. 227 00:17:41,073 --> 00:17:41,906 - Ashtray? 228 00:17:46,186 --> 00:17:47,019 Thank you. 229 00:17:55,267 --> 00:17:56,100 - God. 230 00:18:07,181 --> 00:18:09,598 - You just deployed an angel. 231 00:18:13,993 --> 00:18:16,743 - So it's D-L-O-V-N-A, Swedlovna. 232 00:18:18,883 --> 00:18:19,776 - Uhuh, yeah. 233 00:18:19,776 --> 00:18:22,500 - And Gabriela Skratinova. 234 00:18:22,500 --> 00:18:27,450 So I came two years ago, in Hollywood, I'm from Russia, 235 00:18:27,450 --> 00:18:30,826 and this is my Social Security number. 236 00:18:30,826 --> 00:18:33,148 - Russia, how interesting, I hear they have a lot of 237 00:18:33,148 --> 00:18:36,026 extraterrestrial spaceship sightings over there. 238 00:18:36,026 --> 00:18:36,859 - Oh yeah. 239 00:18:38,936 --> 00:18:41,797 Yeah, especially they've got this, 240 00:18:41,797 --> 00:18:44,547 the freedom from the press, yeah. 241 00:18:46,654 --> 00:18:48,171 - Absolutely. 242 00:18:48,171 --> 00:18:49,530 - Nice dress. 243 00:18:49,530 --> 00:18:50,530 - Thank you. 244 00:18:51,633 --> 00:18:53,960 Okay it works like this here. 245 00:18:53,960 --> 00:18:57,094 As well as dancing you must also wait on the tables, 246 00:18:57,094 --> 00:19:00,123 and our club is very clean, so you must have a decent show. 247 00:19:00,123 --> 00:19:02,137 - Right. - Valued businessmen, okay? 248 00:19:02,137 --> 00:19:02,970 - I do. 249 00:19:02,970 --> 00:19:06,053 - Okay, let me see you figure please. 250 00:19:07,079 --> 00:19:07,912 Lovely. 251 00:19:09,002 --> 00:19:10,398 You must do aerobics. 252 00:19:10,398 --> 00:19:12,148 - Sex, how about you? 253 00:19:16,657 --> 00:19:19,858 - We can have, we can talk about that later okay? 254 00:19:19,858 --> 00:19:20,741 - Yeah sure. 255 00:19:20,741 --> 00:19:24,844 - Okay let me see your show, I'm ready to see you on stage. 256 00:19:24,844 --> 00:19:26,879 - Can I use a mask? 257 00:19:26,879 --> 00:19:27,712 - Excuse me? 258 00:19:27,712 --> 00:19:28,546 - A mask. 259 00:19:28,546 --> 00:19:30,532 - Oh sure, sure, go ahead. 260 00:19:30,532 --> 00:19:31,782 - Okay, thanks. 261 00:19:56,604 --> 00:20:00,840 ♫ I got the moves that boils the blood 262 00:20:00,840 --> 00:20:05,504 ♫ And wicked ways to make you scream and shout 263 00:20:05,504 --> 00:20:10,078 ♫ My sex appeal is not from the air 264 00:20:10,078 --> 00:20:14,245 ♫ But due to you, things you dream about 265 00:20:15,148 --> 00:20:19,035 ♫ I've got 1,000 ways, one zero zero zero ways 266 00:20:19,035 --> 00:20:21,868 ♫ To have affairs 267 00:20:24,248 --> 00:20:28,095 ♫ My name is Thousand Ways, one zero zero zero ways 268 00:20:28,095 --> 00:20:30,595 ♫ So be aware 269 00:20:37,426 --> 00:20:41,954 ♫ I'm in my groove, if you know what I mean 270 00:20:41,954 --> 00:20:46,447 ♫ So come to me, unload your magazine 271 00:20:46,447 --> 00:20:51,101 ♫ You want me there, between your bedroom eyes 272 00:20:51,101 --> 00:20:55,268 ♫ And like to do some lovely exercise 273 00:20:56,272 --> 00:21:00,009 ♫ I've got 1,000 ways, one zero zero zero ways 274 00:21:00,009 --> 00:21:02,842 ♫ To have affairs 275 00:21:05,307 --> 00:21:09,198 ♫ My name is Thousand Ways, one zero zero zero ways 276 00:21:09,198 --> 00:21:11,698 ♫ So be aware 277 00:21:19,190 --> 00:21:21,879 ♫ Come on now 278 00:21:21,879 --> 00:21:24,416 - I think she likes you. 279 00:21:24,416 --> 00:21:27,978 - No she's fooling around Sam, forget it. 280 00:21:27,978 --> 00:21:30,061 - Oh, you don't want her? 281 00:21:32,043 --> 00:21:33,710 - I didn't say that. 282 00:21:36,350 --> 00:21:38,639 - So you do want her? 283 00:21:38,639 --> 00:21:40,889 - I didn't say that either. 284 00:21:43,929 --> 00:21:45,262 - I got an idea. 285 00:21:47,478 --> 00:21:49,752 This will work Harry, Olivia will never know. 286 00:21:49,752 --> 00:21:50,585 - You're nuts. 287 00:21:50,585 --> 00:21:51,418 - This is gonna work. 288 00:21:51,418 --> 00:21:52,251 - I'd never cheat! - Harry trust me! 289 00:21:52,251 --> 00:21:55,070 - I'd never cheat on Olivia, never. 290 00:21:55,070 --> 00:21:56,487 N-E-V-E-R, never. 291 00:21:59,427 --> 00:22:00,844 What's your idea? 292 00:22:03,248 --> 00:22:05,992 - All right I gotta do something talking first. 293 00:22:05,992 --> 00:22:07,672 I gotta give this babe some Hollywood bullshit, 294 00:22:07,672 --> 00:22:10,930 she's never had anything like this in Russia. 295 00:22:14,555 --> 00:22:16,722 - Come in. 296 00:22:22,441 --> 00:22:25,906 - Smashing performance sweetheart. 297 00:22:25,906 --> 00:22:30,073 Woo, you Russians got no match when it comes to dance. 298 00:22:31,102 --> 00:22:35,198 I'm speechless . 299 00:22:35,198 --> 00:22:36,531 Congratulations. 300 00:22:39,182 --> 00:22:43,349 You are so gorgeous, I could drink your bathwater, hmm! 301 00:22:47,300 --> 00:22:49,383 You must be a Libra, hah. 302 00:22:52,509 --> 00:22:53,402 - Capricorn. 303 00:22:53,402 --> 00:22:56,608 - Capricorn, Capricorn, one very artistic sign as well, 304 00:22:56,608 --> 00:22:58,608 you wanna be an actress? 305 00:22:59,655 --> 00:23:00,488 - Maybe. 306 00:23:00,488 --> 00:23:01,887 - I knew it, I knew it. 307 00:23:01,887 --> 00:23:05,514 I am a Hollywood movie producer, Samuel Norton, 308 00:23:05,514 --> 00:23:07,206 you can call me Sammy. 309 00:23:07,206 --> 00:23:09,456 - Hi Sammy. 310 00:23:10,887 --> 00:23:15,054 - I must admit, you got overwhelming talent sweetheart. 311 00:23:17,491 --> 00:23:19,324 Poetry in motion, hmm! 312 00:23:21,741 --> 00:23:24,991 Yeah, you could be hotter than the sun. 313 00:23:25,849 --> 00:23:27,782 No question about it. 314 00:23:27,782 --> 00:23:32,567 I thought to myself, you know, I'm looking at God herself. 315 00:23:35,111 --> 00:23:38,611 Baryshnikov ain't got nothing on you baby. 316 00:23:40,428 --> 00:23:44,114 - Oh, is that right? 317 00:23:44,114 --> 00:23:46,212 - That's right, that's right, 318 00:23:46,212 --> 00:23:50,784 you can bet your whole Mother Russia on that one. 319 00:23:50,784 --> 00:23:54,201 I could make you a movie star in one day. 320 00:23:59,806 --> 00:24:00,639 - Really? 321 00:24:04,090 --> 00:24:08,257 You know, this Communist bullshit, it didn't do anything 322 00:24:09,786 --> 00:24:13,953 to me but this Hollywood bullshit, it just makes me sick. 323 00:24:17,494 --> 00:24:21,661 - Wait a second here, I'm talking parts in movies. 324 00:24:24,484 --> 00:24:28,651 - Ah, now see I don't fuck for parts in the movies. 325 00:24:36,638 --> 00:24:40,471 You know what, why don't you cut the crap huh? 326 00:24:43,207 --> 00:24:46,957 Is there anything else that I can do for you? 327 00:24:49,087 --> 00:24:51,004 - All right, all right. 328 00:24:52,557 --> 00:24:53,599 We'll cut the crap. 329 00:24:53,599 --> 00:24:55,516 - Good. 330 00:24:57,036 --> 00:25:00,646 - There's a very close friend of mine who needs some 331 00:25:00,646 --> 00:25:02,146 special attention. 332 00:25:04,265 --> 00:25:08,056 - Well I charge 100 bucks just to shake hands. 333 00:25:10,116 --> 00:25:13,296 - Whew, he needs more than a handshake. 334 00:25:13,296 --> 00:25:14,379 - No kidding? 335 00:25:19,288 --> 00:25:23,368 Okay, and the rest is negio, negio, negiosh? 336 00:25:23,368 --> 00:25:24,510 - Negotiable? 337 00:25:24,510 --> 00:25:25,400 - Negotiable? 338 00:25:25,400 --> 00:25:26,233 - Negotiable. 339 00:25:26,233 --> 00:25:27,193 - Yeah thanks. - Negotiable. 340 00:25:27,193 --> 00:25:29,860 - So first, I must like the man. 341 00:25:30,874 --> 00:25:34,041 And second I'm not sure if I like you. 342 00:25:35,519 --> 00:25:37,550 - That's cool, you don't have to like me, 343 00:25:37,550 --> 00:25:40,050 you just have to work with me. 344 00:25:42,082 --> 00:25:45,165 - Is the man in the question my boss? 345 00:25:46,331 --> 00:25:48,831 - You do have special talents. 346 00:25:51,818 --> 00:25:54,880 - And he is also a movie producer? 347 00:25:56,611 --> 00:25:58,872 - No, he's a normal guy. 348 00:25:58,872 --> 00:26:01,205 - Good, so then we can talk. 349 00:26:10,548 --> 00:26:14,267 ♫ Dancing for a living, keep my body into shape 350 00:26:14,267 --> 00:26:18,320 ♫ And the way I'm making it is tax free 351 00:26:18,320 --> 00:26:22,517 ♫ I travel with a secretary, I'm her favorite 352 00:26:22,517 --> 00:26:26,723 ♫ And the profits are all for me 353 00:26:26,723 --> 00:26:30,777 ♫ Dancing for a living, keep my body into shape 354 00:26:30,777 --> 00:26:34,944 ♫ And the way I'm making it is tax free 355 00:26:36,348 --> 00:26:39,993 - Sam stop chasing my girls around. 356 00:26:39,993 --> 00:26:42,070 - You are gorgeous. 357 00:26:42,070 --> 00:26:44,383 - Quit invading my space, go! 358 00:26:53,979 --> 00:26:56,396 - Everything's taken care of. 359 00:26:57,496 --> 00:27:01,496 How do you spend your evenings, I mean, usually. 360 00:27:02,421 --> 00:27:04,404 - Sitting by the pool with a drink or two, 361 00:27:04,404 --> 00:27:07,661 listening to my neighbors moaning. 362 00:27:07,661 --> 00:27:10,161 They bang a lot, I mean a lot. 363 00:27:13,632 --> 00:27:14,465 Why? 364 00:27:16,602 --> 00:27:18,935 - Just be there, you'll see. 365 00:28:25,968 --> 00:28:28,635 - I can't believe it, oh my God. 366 00:28:50,869 --> 00:28:52,452 I can't believe it! 367 00:28:53,865 --> 00:28:54,698 Holy shit! 368 00:29:04,322 --> 00:29:06,072 Unbelievable, unreal. 369 00:29:25,251 --> 00:29:26,084 Oh my God. 370 00:29:31,022 --> 00:29:31,855 Meg! 371 00:29:33,447 --> 00:29:36,364 Victor, wake up, just for a minute. 372 00:29:37,312 --> 00:29:38,824 - Ah, what's up baby? 373 00:29:38,824 --> 00:29:39,657 - A UFO. 374 00:29:40,641 --> 00:29:44,240 An extraterrestrial aircraft abducted Harry. 375 00:29:44,240 --> 00:29:45,073 - Who? 376 00:29:46,045 --> 00:29:50,322 - Read my lips, an Unidentified Flying Object 377 00:29:50,322 --> 00:29:51,572 abducted Harry. 378 00:29:54,295 --> 00:29:56,462 - My UFO is abducting you. 379 00:30:19,434 --> 00:30:21,851 This balloon kicks ass Harry. 380 00:30:24,846 --> 00:30:27,763 I didn't name it Satan for nothing. 381 00:30:30,242 --> 00:30:33,334 ♫ Flying high in the morning sky 382 00:30:33,334 --> 00:30:37,277 ♫ Where the eagles soar 383 00:30:37,277 --> 00:30:40,914 ♫ , when I take you down 384 00:30:40,914 --> 00:30:43,664 ♫ I've got to go 385 00:30:48,485 --> 00:30:52,119 ♫ Thousand Ways is waiting for you 386 00:30:52,119 --> 00:30:56,286 ♫ Waiting to give you the night of your life 387 00:30:58,553 --> 00:30:59,386 - Ah... 388 00:31:07,922 --> 00:31:10,563 Just what the doctor ordered. 389 00:31:10,563 --> 00:31:12,643 - I can't believe I'm doing this. 390 00:31:12,643 --> 00:31:15,303 - You better believe it man, Thousand Ways is waiting 391 00:31:15,303 --> 00:31:17,053 for you ass baby, ah? 392 00:31:18,068 --> 00:31:19,681 - What did she say? 393 00:31:19,681 --> 00:31:23,191 - She wants you, you son of a bitch. 394 00:31:23,191 --> 00:31:25,433 Oh if such a babe wanted me, I wouldn't be taking 395 00:31:25,433 --> 00:31:29,183 no balloon, I'd rent the Space Shuttle, phew! 396 00:31:33,347 --> 00:31:36,951 I'm gonna land you right on her balcony, 397 00:31:36,951 --> 00:31:39,784 Romeo and Juliet in the Space Age. 398 00:31:42,031 --> 00:31:43,864 God I love this stuff. 399 00:32:06,275 --> 00:32:10,185 - It landed right there, in absolute silence. 400 00:32:10,185 --> 00:32:11,865 I mean silence. 401 00:32:11,865 --> 00:32:14,448 I could even hear the crickets. 402 00:32:16,014 --> 00:32:19,235 And look see, there's no traces left whatsoever, 403 00:32:19,235 --> 00:32:21,428 that's 'cause they use anti-gravity principle. 404 00:32:21,428 --> 00:32:22,928 - Pfft, of course. 405 00:32:25,241 --> 00:32:27,070 Who are they? 406 00:32:27,070 --> 00:32:28,153 - The aliens. 407 00:32:29,315 --> 00:32:30,148 - Aliens? 408 00:32:30,148 --> 00:32:30,981 - Yes. 409 00:32:32,633 --> 00:32:34,383 - Not good, not good. 410 00:32:36,613 --> 00:32:40,780 - God, wow, God knows where they could drop him off. 411 00:32:44,244 --> 00:32:46,116 - You should call the police. 412 00:32:46,116 --> 00:32:47,567 - Duh. 413 00:32:47,567 --> 00:32:50,212 - Yeah right, on what ground? 414 00:32:50,212 --> 00:32:52,358 Hi this is Mrs. Smith calling, my husband's 415 00:32:52,358 --> 00:32:54,442 just been abducted by aliens, but see they've left 416 00:32:54,442 --> 00:32:56,851 no traces whatsoever, so why don't you come on over 417 00:32:56,851 --> 00:32:59,820 and check it out, I don't think so. 418 00:32:59,820 --> 00:33:04,475 - You should call the police, they have very good training. 419 00:33:04,475 --> 00:33:05,642 - That's true. 420 00:33:06,863 --> 00:33:07,696 - Oh, oh. 421 00:33:08,725 --> 00:33:11,388 - Look, he didn't finish his drink. 422 00:33:11,388 --> 00:33:13,761 Now I know he's been kidnapped. 423 00:33:13,761 --> 00:33:15,368 You better call 411. 424 00:33:15,368 --> 00:33:16,701 I mean 911, 911. 425 00:33:20,287 --> 00:33:21,504 - My husband was abducted by 426 00:33:21,504 --> 00:33:23,454 an Unidentified Flying Object. 427 00:33:23,454 --> 00:33:25,142 - Are you sure Ma'am? 428 00:33:25,142 --> 00:33:27,522 - Yes you heard me, abducted by 429 00:33:27,522 --> 00:33:30,143 an Unidentified Flying Object, yes. 430 00:33:30,143 --> 00:33:31,458 - Are you sure Ma'am it was 431 00:33:31,458 --> 00:33:33,483 not an unidentified car? 432 00:33:33,483 --> 00:33:37,483 - No car officer, an Unidentified Flying Object, 433 00:33:38,613 --> 00:33:41,457 it landed in my backyard, I saw it myself. 434 00:33:41,457 --> 00:33:43,781 It made no noise whatsoever, and just came 435 00:33:43,781 --> 00:33:45,267 and kidnapped my husband. 436 00:33:45,267 --> 00:33:48,569 - Yeah he didn't finish his drink. 437 00:33:48,569 --> 00:33:50,059 - All right all right, we'll dispatch 438 00:33:50,059 --> 00:33:52,556 a detective over first thing in the morning. 439 00:33:52,556 --> 00:33:55,312 - Okay officer can you do me a favor and send an expert? 440 00:33:55,312 --> 00:33:58,321 - Will do Ma'am, all our detectives are experts. 441 00:33:58,321 --> 00:34:00,738 - Great, all right thank you. 442 00:34:04,085 --> 00:34:05,690 - Are they gonna send police officers? 443 00:34:05,690 --> 00:34:07,440 - Yes in the morning. 444 00:34:08,304 --> 00:34:10,335 - Why not right away? 445 00:34:10,335 --> 00:34:11,835 - It's 2 a.m. Meg. 446 00:34:13,991 --> 00:34:17,324 - So, so Olivia your husband is missing. 447 00:34:19,407 --> 00:34:22,657 - I know, but what am I supposed to do? 448 00:34:27,163 --> 00:34:31,330 I can't imagine Harry's picture on a carton of milk. 449 00:34:40,720 --> 00:34:42,910 - Don't bullshit her or you'll blow it. 450 00:34:42,910 --> 00:34:46,735 She's a Capricorn, she told me she charges 100 bucks 451 00:34:46,735 --> 00:34:48,208 just to shake hands. 452 00:34:48,208 --> 00:34:50,705 - Must be one hell of a handshake. 453 00:34:50,705 --> 00:34:54,122 - Let me know, good luck, have fun. 454 00:34:55,234 --> 00:34:56,317 - Thanks Sam. 455 00:35:01,662 --> 00:35:02,912 - Wow, my boss. 456 00:35:05,424 --> 00:35:08,984 Arriving in a balloon, that's so romantic. 457 00:35:10,407 --> 00:35:11,632 - Hi Thousand Ways. 458 00:35:11,632 --> 00:35:12,505 - Hi. 459 00:35:12,505 --> 00:35:15,672 - Damn, I can't get used to that name. 460 00:35:16,913 --> 00:35:21,566 - Well you can call me, sweetheart, sweetheart, yes. 461 00:35:21,566 --> 00:35:23,759 - Sweetheart, sweetheart. - Yes, hi. 462 00:35:23,759 --> 00:35:27,926 - Hi oh this must be one expensive handshake huh sweetheart? 463 00:35:29,135 --> 00:35:32,468 - You know your friend is a bozo, okay? 464 00:35:34,435 --> 00:35:37,865 I just said that to make a point, nothing else. 465 00:35:37,865 --> 00:35:39,448 So please, come in. 466 00:35:40,615 --> 00:35:43,448 - Oh, uh, are we having champagne. 467 00:35:45,679 --> 00:35:49,522 - Well you know, don't be disappointed but I'm not 468 00:35:49,522 --> 00:35:52,550 used to get there right away, so uhm. 469 00:35:52,550 --> 00:35:54,821 - Oh I didn't mean it that way, really. 470 00:35:54,821 --> 00:35:56,338 It's uh, you know, great. 471 00:35:56,338 --> 00:35:57,599 - Yeah help yourself. 472 00:35:57,599 --> 00:35:58,791 - I love champagne. 473 00:35:58,791 --> 00:35:59,640 - That's great, great. 474 00:35:59,640 --> 00:36:00,786 - Yes, great stuff. 475 00:36:00,786 --> 00:36:01,869 - Yeah it is. 476 00:36:04,609 --> 00:36:05,442 So? 477 00:36:11,003 --> 00:36:13,420 How long haven't you had sex? 478 00:36:15,396 --> 00:36:18,979 - I can't remember the last time I had sex. 479 00:36:20,510 --> 00:36:21,593 - I can tell. 480 00:36:24,928 --> 00:36:28,011 Well what's wrong with your wife huh? 481 00:36:29,208 --> 00:36:33,069 - Oh uh, well she thinks the bed doesn't represent 482 00:36:33,069 --> 00:36:37,236 traditional values like love, marriage and flying saucers. 483 00:36:41,070 --> 00:36:43,153 - Oh that's the UFO junk. 484 00:36:45,340 --> 00:36:46,340 Or the jonk? 485 00:36:47,186 --> 00:36:48,384 - UFO junkie. 486 00:36:48,384 --> 00:36:52,060 - Junkie, junkie. - Yeah that's her all right. 487 00:36:52,060 --> 00:36:55,053 - So, no sex in the family huh? 488 00:36:55,053 --> 00:36:56,970 - No sex in the family. 489 00:37:02,269 --> 00:37:03,523 - Cheers. 490 00:37:03,523 --> 00:37:04,356 - Cheers. 491 00:37:18,260 --> 00:37:21,813 - She better do something about it though. 492 00:37:21,813 --> 00:37:22,980 - Huh? 493 00:37:24,563 --> 00:37:28,730 - Because otherwise you might be flying your ass off huh? 494 00:37:34,974 --> 00:37:36,369 - Yeah. 495 00:37:36,369 --> 00:37:37,202 - Yeah. 496 00:37:40,012 --> 00:37:42,262 Let's go to my bedroom huh? 497 00:37:43,598 --> 00:37:46,310 - I thought you said you're not used to getting laid 498 00:37:46,310 --> 00:37:47,893 on your first date? 499 00:37:51,436 --> 00:37:53,103 - I changed my mind. 500 00:37:55,922 --> 00:37:56,839 - How come? 501 00:37:58,719 --> 00:37:59,886 - I just love. 502 00:38:03,294 --> 00:38:05,294 Screwing with my bosses. 503 00:38:26,531 --> 00:38:31,214 - Ouch, when is Harry gonna move this damn stump. 504 00:38:31,214 --> 00:38:32,964 Oh oh, no more Harry. 505 00:38:42,778 --> 00:38:44,695 - Come in Meg. 506 00:38:45,997 --> 00:38:46,924 - Hi. 507 00:38:46,924 --> 00:38:48,703 - Hi. 508 00:38:48,703 --> 00:38:50,741 - Did you have your coffee yet this morning? 509 00:38:50,741 --> 00:38:54,041 - No, did you have your intercourse this morning? 510 00:38:54,041 --> 00:38:57,598 - No, I am so sure, Victor and I were so upset 511 00:38:57,598 --> 00:38:59,431 and so worried about Harry that we decided 512 00:38:59,431 --> 00:39:01,495 to skip it this morning. 513 00:39:01,495 --> 00:39:05,662 - Listen don't let Harry's abduction mess up your sex life. 514 00:39:07,079 --> 00:39:09,077 - Well, what does the big book say? 515 00:39:09,077 --> 00:39:10,341 Are they gonna drop him off in the backyard 516 00:39:10,341 --> 00:39:11,570 where they picked him up? 517 00:39:11,570 --> 00:39:12,712 The Aliens I mean. 518 00:39:12,712 --> 00:39:15,506 - Meg, what do you think, they're UPS or something? 519 00:39:15,506 --> 00:39:17,334 Harry will never know what happened to him, 520 00:39:17,334 --> 00:39:20,927 they may just drop him off in any country, 521 00:39:20,927 --> 00:39:23,384 - When do the police officers get here? 522 00:39:23,384 --> 00:39:26,594 - Not the police officers Meg, detectives, detectives. 523 00:39:26,594 --> 00:39:27,427 - Detectives? 524 00:39:27,427 --> 00:39:28,260 - Yes. 525 00:39:28,260 --> 00:39:29,093 - Well! 526 00:39:30,355 --> 00:39:31,188 - That's them. 527 00:39:31,188 --> 00:39:32,579 - How do I look. 528 00:39:32,579 --> 00:39:33,996 - Ready to party. 529 00:39:38,932 --> 00:39:39,765 - Hi. 530 00:39:39,765 --> 00:39:43,223 - Hi, Detective Blackwood, LAPD. 531 00:39:43,223 --> 00:39:45,003 - Where are the others? 532 00:39:45,003 --> 00:39:47,836 - This is it Ma'am, can I come in? 533 00:39:49,485 --> 00:39:53,002 - It happened right over here my husband was having a drink. 534 00:39:53,002 --> 00:39:53,835 - Over here? 535 00:39:53,835 --> 00:39:55,372 - Yeah. 536 00:39:55,372 --> 00:39:56,373 - Was he sitting here Ma'am? 537 00:39:56,373 --> 00:39:58,623 - Yes he was sitting there. 538 00:40:11,526 --> 00:40:13,383 - Flying saucers huh? 539 00:40:13,383 --> 00:40:15,972 - Yeah, Unidentified Flying Objects actually. 540 00:40:15,972 --> 00:40:16,805 - Hmm. 541 00:40:19,087 --> 00:40:21,164 - My husband was having a drink right over there, 542 00:40:21,164 --> 00:40:24,534 and a very powerfully lit object, I repeat, 543 00:40:24,534 --> 00:40:28,349 a very powerfully lit object landed making no... 544 00:40:28,349 --> 00:40:33,101 Making no noise whatsoever, and abducted my husband. 545 00:40:33,101 --> 00:40:36,313 - Ma'am, I have a very serious problem with that. 546 00:40:36,313 --> 00:40:40,448 - Well it seriously happened, sir I was right over there. 547 00:40:40,448 --> 00:40:41,281 - Over where? 548 00:40:41,281 --> 00:40:44,698 - Right over here, I saw the whole thing. 549 00:40:45,796 --> 00:40:49,963 Right over here, right in front of me, I sat over there. 550 00:40:52,453 --> 00:40:53,370 - UFOs huh? 551 00:40:54,396 --> 00:40:56,474 - Yeah, yeah, I've been studying the matter 552 00:40:56,474 --> 00:40:58,295 for quite some time you know. 553 00:40:58,295 --> 00:41:02,879 - Well I, haven't studied the matter but it seems like 554 00:41:02,879 --> 00:41:05,749 your husband was picked up by some unidentified friend 555 00:41:05,749 --> 00:41:09,769 and let's say they went fishing or something. 556 00:41:09,769 --> 00:41:13,019 - Oh what are you driving at Detective? 557 00:41:13,865 --> 00:41:16,075 - How was your relationship with your husband Ma'am? 558 00:41:16,075 --> 00:41:18,960 - Oh spare me I didn't ask for a shrink, 559 00:41:18,960 --> 00:41:20,960 I asked for a detective. 560 00:41:22,306 --> 00:41:25,364 Harry, oh God, Harry it's so good to see you, 561 00:41:25,364 --> 00:41:28,581 I was so worried, what did they do to you? 562 00:41:28,581 --> 00:41:30,664 Come on you need to rest. 563 00:41:32,512 --> 00:41:34,336 Hi Harry, how are you? 564 00:41:34,336 --> 00:41:36,347 - Great, hey what's going on? 565 00:41:36,347 --> 00:41:38,319 - I already have a strategy for you, first we're gonna 566 00:41:38,319 --> 00:41:39,959 go and get regressive hypnosis treatment 567 00:41:39,959 --> 00:41:42,421 so we can uncover the events that happened to you last night 568 00:41:42,421 --> 00:41:44,330 second we're gonna go and find all the other people 569 00:41:44,330 --> 00:41:45,512 who've had the same UFO experiences-- 570 00:41:45,512 --> 00:41:46,345 - Hold it. 571 00:41:46,345 --> 00:41:47,178 - That way you can talk and understand-- 572 00:41:47,178 --> 00:41:48,761 - Hold it, hold it! 573 00:41:50,181 --> 00:41:52,256 Who is this guy? 574 00:41:52,256 --> 00:41:54,533 - Detective Blackwood, LAPD. 575 00:41:54,533 --> 00:41:59,412 Your wife claims that you were abducted by a UFO last night. 576 00:41:59,412 --> 00:42:00,245 - UFO? 577 00:42:01,486 --> 00:42:03,698 I told you there are no UFOs. 578 00:42:03,698 --> 00:42:07,417 - No shit Harry, you have xenophobia. 579 00:42:07,417 --> 00:42:11,480 - Well what did happen to you last night Mr. Smith? 580 00:42:11,480 --> 00:42:12,980 - I had an affair. 581 00:42:14,229 --> 00:42:15,062 - Oopsie. 582 00:42:16,256 --> 00:42:20,423 - Sorry, listen, I didn't mean to be a home-wrecker. 583 00:42:21,797 --> 00:42:23,621 - You had an affair? 584 00:42:23,621 --> 00:42:27,788 - Yeah, a cheerful and pointless sexual encounter. 585 00:42:29,127 --> 00:42:31,833 I spent the night with another woman. 586 00:42:31,833 --> 00:42:33,022 - Oh, what woman? 587 00:42:33,022 --> 00:42:34,439 - A pretty woman. 588 00:42:36,150 --> 00:42:39,033 - You had an affair with a pretty woman? 589 00:42:39,033 --> 00:42:39,866 - Yes, I did. 590 00:42:39,866 --> 00:42:42,533 - Hmm, you wish you did, oh God. 591 00:42:44,017 --> 00:42:47,737 Harry wake up, wake up, you were abducted last night 592 00:42:47,737 --> 00:42:51,044 by aliens, right in my backyard, I saw the whole thing. 593 00:42:51,044 --> 00:42:53,959 You are having such wishful hallucinations. 594 00:42:53,959 --> 00:42:54,792 - Really? 595 00:42:54,792 --> 00:42:57,416 - Yeah, God I mean your memory is just wiped out, 596 00:42:57,416 --> 00:42:58,999 gone, blank, kaput! 597 00:43:01,072 --> 00:43:03,405 - I thought I had an affair. 598 00:43:04,255 --> 00:43:06,821 - Oh God those aliens are playing tricks on you. 599 00:43:09,126 --> 00:43:11,793 - You are a lucky man Mr. Smith. 600 00:43:12,680 --> 00:43:15,482 - Thanks for coming Detective Freud. 601 00:43:15,482 --> 00:43:17,353 Your time is up. 602 00:43:17,353 --> 00:43:18,436 - Yeah, sure. 603 00:43:24,382 --> 00:43:27,632 - Well, two's company, three's a crowd. 604 00:43:34,640 --> 00:43:38,922 You know, this UFO thing has just messed everything up. 605 00:43:38,922 --> 00:43:41,672 - Did you see it, this UFO thing? 606 00:43:42,875 --> 00:43:47,334 - Uh no, I mean, to abduct a man from his own backyard, 607 00:43:47,334 --> 00:43:48,417 it's amazing. 608 00:43:50,343 --> 00:43:52,010 - It's very amazing. 609 00:43:53,015 --> 00:43:55,008 - We should talk about this, would you like to come over 610 00:43:55,008 --> 00:43:57,849 for some coffee, I live right next door. 611 00:43:57,849 --> 00:44:00,017 - Don't drink coffee. 612 00:44:00,017 --> 00:44:02,209 - How about some tea? 613 00:44:02,209 --> 00:44:05,045 - Don't drink tea either? 614 00:44:05,045 --> 00:44:05,878 - Soda? 615 00:44:07,289 --> 00:44:09,289 - Don't even drink soda. 616 00:44:10,848 --> 00:44:14,598 - How about some V8 with a sprinkle of vodka? 617 00:44:16,985 --> 00:44:21,152 - I don't drink vegetables, and definitely no alcohol. 618 00:44:22,149 --> 00:44:24,566 - So you don't drink nothing? 619 00:44:25,575 --> 00:44:30,297 - Do I have to drink something to go to bed with you? 620 00:44:30,297 --> 00:44:34,220 - Uhm, uh, no, no, we can do it in the pool, 621 00:44:34,220 --> 00:44:35,713 my husband's at work. 622 00:44:35,713 --> 00:44:37,132 - I figured that out. 623 00:44:37,132 --> 00:44:39,715 - You're a real good detective. 624 00:44:40,870 --> 00:44:43,328 - I have a friend who knows a hypnotist, 625 00:44:43,328 --> 00:44:46,100 who says this guy is the best, he's gonna show you 626 00:44:46,100 --> 00:44:47,517 the real picture. 627 00:44:48,467 --> 00:44:53,094 - Olivia darling, let me show you the real picture. 628 00:44:53,094 --> 00:44:56,677 It's called I love you, and want you badly. 629 00:44:58,052 --> 00:45:02,444 - Slow down Romeo, you were abducted by aliens last night 630 00:45:02,444 --> 00:45:05,494 Harry, you've gotta get some treatment. 631 00:45:05,494 --> 00:45:07,926 - This is the best treatment I know 632 00:45:07,926 --> 00:45:09,564 against alien abductions. 633 00:45:09,564 --> 00:45:11,314 - No, no, no, no, no. 634 00:45:12,490 --> 00:45:16,240 I suggest you sign up in Abductees Anonymous. 635 00:45:18,512 --> 00:45:20,512 - I suggest you sign up. 636 00:45:23,425 --> 00:45:25,258 I've got a bar to run. 637 00:45:40,467 --> 00:45:42,634 ♫ My love 638 00:45:43,807 --> 00:45:46,640 ♫ I love only you 639 00:45:53,590 --> 00:45:56,507 ♫ I've tried to be 640 00:45:59,184 --> 00:46:01,684 ♫ Without you 641 00:46:08,117 --> 00:46:11,784 ♫ Sometimes I feel unwanted 642 00:46:14,597 --> 00:46:17,413 ♫ Sometimes I need a woman 643 00:46:17,413 --> 00:46:18,792 - It has happened. 644 00:46:18,792 --> 00:46:21,042 ♫ Like you 645 00:46:23,087 --> 00:46:25,254 ♫ My love 646 00:46:26,099 --> 00:46:28,646 ♫ I love you 647 00:46:28,646 --> 00:46:31,605 ♫ Oh yes I do 648 00:46:31,605 --> 00:46:33,482 - How did it go? 649 00:46:33,482 --> 00:46:34,315 - Great. 650 00:46:36,314 --> 00:46:37,314 - All right. 651 00:46:40,363 --> 00:46:41,812 How's Olivia? 652 00:46:41,812 --> 00:46:43,670 - I told her the truth, I'm having an affair. 653 00:46:43,670 --> 00:46:45,508 - What, Harry what are you doing? 654 00:46:45,508 --> 00:46:47,255 - Hey, hey wait a minute, no wait! 655 00:46:47,255 --> 00:46:48,143 - You can't do that. 656 00:46:48,143 --> 00:46:49,678 - Wait, I pulled it off. 657 00:46:49,678 --> 00:46:50,624 - What do you mean? 658 00:46:50,624 --> 00:46:54,374 - She's dead sure I was abducted by an alien. 659 00:46:59,091 --> 00:46:59,924 Yeah. 660 00:47:01,123 --> 00:47:03,327 - In this great land of opportunity of ours 661 00:47:03,327 --> 00:47:04,899 you never know what you can get away with, 662 00:47:04,899 --> 00:47:06,298 until you try it man. 663 00:47:08,100 --> 00:47:12,267 - Wait a minute. 664 00:47:15,330 --> 00:47:18,080 Here's a bonus for Thousand Ways. 665 00:47:27,341 --> 00:47:29,424 - What can I get you Sam? 666 00:47:31,386 --> 00:47:35,749 - You can uh, get closer with your gluteus maximus. 667 00:47:35,749 --> 00:47:39,171 - With what, gluteus max, what is that? 668 00:47:39,171 --> 00:47:40,004 Maximus? 669 00:47:41,154 --> 00:47:43,321 - Your cash register baby. 670 00:47:44,739 --> 00:47:48,156 A little gift from Harry, a little bonus. 671 00:47:49,326 --> 00:47:50,909 - Oh that was fast. 672 00:47:55,634 --> 00:47:58,051 Listen I wanna see him again. 673 00:47:59,379 --> 00:48:00,961 - You like the money huh? 674 00:48:00,961 --> 00:48:02,574 - Wrong, I didn't do it for the money, 675 00:48:02,574 --> 00:48:06,741 I just got this handicap, I love screwing with my bosses. 676 00:48:08,729 --> 00:48:13,125 - You can get well ahead with a handicap like that. 677 00:48:13,125 --> 00:48:14,875 - Pure sex, pure sex. 678 00:48:16,182 --> 00:48:19,023 I just keep my body in shape, and uh, 679 00:48:19,023 --> 00:48:20,940 I consider it aerobics. 680 00:48:22,294 --> 00:48:23,127 - All right. 681 00:48:23,127 --> 00:48:26,127 - Okay, I gotta go, thanks, bye bye. 682 00:48:29,233 --> 00:48:30,961 - Aerobics huh? 683 00:48:30,961 --> 00:48:34,378 That's great. 684 00:48:40,198 --> 00:48:43,198 ♫ Yes I do, my love 685 00:48:44,567 --> 00:48:46,984 - Harry, you wanna fly again? 686 00:48:49,809 --> 00:48:52,559 - My budget's getting kinda lean. 687 00:48:53,522 --> 00:48:55,817 - No cash involved. 688 00:48:55,817 --> 00:48:58,433 She considers it aerobics. 689 00:49:00,332 --> 00:49:01,249 - Aerobics? 690 00:49:03,600 --> 00:49:06,100 I'll consider it aerobics too. 691 00:49:07,594 --> 00:49:10,517 - You know there's one thing I don't understand Harry. 692 00:49:10,517 --> 00:49:13,051 If you guys are doing all of this aerobics, 693 00:49:13,051 --> 00:49:15,218 why do I feel like a pimp? 694 00:49:17,706 --> 00:49:20,456 - Because you are a fucking pimp. 695 00:49:22,016 --> 00:49:23,861 And you love flying UFOs. 696 00:49:23,861 --> 00:49:27,138 - Oh I'll tell ya, I am getting into this. 697 00:49:27,138 --> 00:49:29,721 I'll pick you up, 1 a.m. sharp. 698 00:49:45,483 --> 00:49:49,650 - Olivia honey, please, let's make love tonight. 699 00:49:51,557 --> 00:49:54,220 - Harry can't you think about something else? 700 00:49:54,220 --> 00:49:55,887 - Like what? 701 00:49:56,759 --> 00:49:59,030 - Like maybe learning more about 702 00:49:59,030 --> 00:50:00,690 what happened here last night? 703 00:50:00,690 --> 00:50:03,690 - I know what happened last night. 704 00:50:03,690 --> 00:50:04,874 - No you don't. 705 00:50:04,874 --> 00:50:05,769 - Yes I do. 706 00:50:05,769 --> 00:50:06,602 - No you don't! 707 00:50:06,602 --> 00:50:07,435 - Yes I do - Don't! 708 00:50:07,435 --> 00:50:08,518 - Do! - Don't! 709 00:50:10,113 --> 00:50:12,052 - Did it ever occur to you that your addiction to UFOs 710 00:50:12,052 --> 00:50:16,757 may be the reason why I was taken for a ride yesterday? 711 00:50:16,757 --> 00:50:21,260 - It's not an addiction honey, it's not -ism like UFO-ism. 712 00:50:21,260 --> 00:50:23,083 It's a research. 713 00:50:23,083 --> 00:50:24,666 - Research of what? 714 00:50:26,089 --> 00:50:30,117 - Extraterrestrial civilizations visiting Earth. 715 00:50:30,117 --> 00:50:31,867 - Visiting your head! 716 00:50:33,402 --> 00:50:35,204 - Harry they do exist. 717 00:50:35,204 --> 00:50:37,204 You are so ethnocentric. 718 00:50:38,879 --> 00:50:42,629 - Of course they exist, no question about it. 719 00:50:45,453 --> 00:50:48,953 What I mean to say is, that your research, 720 00:50:50,150 --> 00:50:52,400 is drawing alien spacecraft 721 00:50:54,929 --> 00:50:57,596 into our backyard like a magnet. 722 00:50:58,864 --> 00:51:00,233 - What magnet? 723 00:51:00,233 --> 00:51:02,816 - Go figure, what if these UFOs 724 00:51:04,081 --> 00:51:06,081 come here again tonight? 725 00:51:09,537 --> 00:51:12,382 - It's impossible, they never abduct the same 726 00:51:12,382 --> 00:51:14,043 human being twice, ever. 727 00:51:14,043 --> 00:51:15,523 - Oh yeah? 728 00:51:15,523 --> 00:51:17,095 - Yeah, yeah! 729 00:51:17,095 --> 00:51:20,629 - Oh, well, what if they amended the rule 730 00:51:20,629 --> 00:51:23,215 and didn't let you know about it? 731 00:51:23,215 --> 00:51:24,866 - What do you know about it anyway? 732 00:51:24,866 --> 00:51:28,366 You have a severe case of alien ignorance. 733 00:51:30,944 --> 00:51:33,527 - So it's saucer-safe out here. 734 00:51:36,605 --> 00:51:40,772 Okay, I'm out, . 735 00:51:44,130 --> 00:51:45,742 - What does that mean? 736 00:51:45,742 --> 00:51:47,909 - Russian, for good night. 737 00:52:56,509 --> 00:52:58,176 - They did it again? 738 00:53:09,658 --> 00:53:12,075 Holy shit, they did it again. 739 00:53:44,048 --> 00:53:44,881 Meg? 740 00:53:47,355 --> 00:53:48,188 Megan! 741 00:53:50,907 --> 00:53:52,407 They did it again. 742 00:53:53,553 --> 00:53:54,636 - What? 743 00:53:56,148 --> 00:53:58,981 - The aliens abducted Harry again. 744 00:54:00,279 --> 00:54:02,329 - Bastards. 745 00:54:14,952 --> 00:54:19,772 - The span between those two specimens is 19 centuries. 746 00:54:19,772 --> 00:54:23,589 These human creatures look all the same. 747 00:54:23,589 --> 00:54:27,156 - Why do they dress like that? 748 00:54:27,156 --> 00:54:31,078 - They want to impress their females. 749 00:55:18,847 --> 00:55:22,118 ♫ You're the only one I know 750 00:55:22,118 --> 00:55:25,044 ♫ And baby do it all night long 751 00:55:25,044 --> 00:55:28,520 ♫ You know my body, like nobody 752 00:55:28,520 --> 00:55:32,291 ♫ And you penetrate my soul 753 00:55:32,291 --> 00:55:36,458 ♫ The sex with you is beyond compare 754 00:55:37,713 --> 00:55:41,880 ♫ Oh you make me feel, you make me share 755 00:55:44,796 --> 00:55:47,159 ♫ Do you know I like it 756 00:55:47,159 --> 00:55:49,486 - That guy must be an actor. 757 00:55:55,287 --> 00:55:56,497 - Going to Hollywood? 758 00:55:56,497 --> 00:55:58,832 - No we're going to Cleveland. 759 00:56:00,774 --> 00:56:01,646 Get in. 760 00:56:01,646 --> 00:56:02,646 - Thank you. 761 00:56:21,114 --> 00:56:25,138 - So what happened, crew leave you behind? 762 00:56:25,138 --> 00:56:26,721 - I'm not an actor. 763 00:56:31,338 --> 00:56:34,588 - Yeah so uh, how'd you get the outfit? 764 00:56:36,073 --> 00:56:38,740 - Your guess is as good as mine. 765 00:56:40,381 --> 00:56:41,548 - Interesting. 766 00:56:42,553 --> 00:56:44,055 - Tell me about it. 767 00:56:59,925 --> 00:57:00,758 - God! 768 00:57:41,156 --> 00:57:42,975 How did you do that? 769 00:57:42,975 --> 00:57:43,808 - Do what? 770 00:57:45,669 --> 00:57:48,118 - You were inside of me. 771 00:57:48,118 --> 00:57:48,951 - Say what? 772 00:57:48,951 --> 00:57:49,810 - Say what! 773 00:57:49,810 --> 00:57:53,643 - Yeah baby, yeah, you, you were inside of me. 774 00:57:55,436 --> 00:57:57,191 - What did you do to my lady? 775 00:57:57,191 --> 00:57:58,024 - I don't know. 776 00:57:58,024 --> 00:57:59,666 - What did you do to my lady? 777 00:57:59,666 --> 00:58:01,023 - You tell me, you were closer. 778 00:58:01,023 --> 00:58:02,073 - You raped my lady! 779 00:58:02,073 --> 00:58:02,956 - I raped your lady? 780 00:58:02,956 --> 00:58:04,332 - You raped my lady! 781 00:58:04,332 --> 00:58:06,544 - Sounds to me like she raped herself. 782 00:58:06,544 --> 00:58:07,377 - What? 783 00:58:08,266 --> 00:58:09,762 - You are a dead man. 784 00:58:09,762 --> 00:58:10,679 - Hey, hey. 785 00:58:12,306 --> 00:58:14,681 I didn't even touch her. 786 00:58:14,681 --> 00:58:16,848 - Wait a minute, he's right. 787 00:58:16,848 --> 00:58:18,431 He didn't touch me. 788 00:58:22,128 --> 00:58:23,946 - Did you just get off? 789 00:58:23,946 --> 00:58:26,863 - Yeah with a, yeah with a fantasy. 790 00:58:28,645 --> 00:58:32,018 - Fantasies are good for humans, they get off on them. 791 00:58:32,018 --> 00:58:35,318 - Get the hell outta my car, get the hell outta my car 792 00:58:35,318 --> 00:58:36,818 before I kill you. 793 00:58:45,190 --> 00:58:46,410 What the hell are you doing? 794 00:58:46,410 --> 00:58:47,558 - I didn't do anything. 795 00:58:47,558 --> 00:58:49,554 - The hell you didn't, didn't you just get off? 796 00:58:49,554 --> 00:58:51,457 - What are you talking abut, you saw me! 797 00:58:51,457 --> 00:58:53,625 - I saw you get off in the car with him. 798 00:58:53,625 --> 00:58:56,593 - Oh well, maybe because he took better care of me. 799 00:58:56,593 --> 00:58:58,767 - Well it looks like you can take of yourself huh? 800 00:58:58,767 --> 00:59:00,421 - You saw what I was doing. 801 00:59:00,421 --> 00:59:02,333 - I saw you come in the car. 802 00:59:02,333 --> 00:59:03,166 - Hey! 803 00:59:03,166 --> 00:59:05,460 - I told you I didn't touch her! 804 00:59:05,460 --> 00:59:07,195 - I don't know what this stuff was all right? 805 00:59:07,195 --> 00:59:09,528 - I don't either... 806 00:59:21,033 --> 00:59:24,200 - Hi, would you mind giving me a lift? 807 00:59:29,099 --> 00:59:30,715 What's the matter? 808 00:59:30,715 --> 00:59:33,715 - Well, are you filming around here? 809 00:59:36,231 --> 00:59:37,814 - I'm not an actor. 810 00:59:40,405 --> 00:59:44,322 - I see so uhm, what's with the outfit? 811 00:59:45,272 --> 00:59:48,192 - I don't know, I woke up in the desert, 812 00:59:48,192 --> 00:59:52,359 must've had one drink too many you know, total blackout. 813 00:59:53,463 --> 00:59:55,667 Hey, you need some help? 814 00:59:55,667 --> 00:59:58,514 - Sure, why don't you put the flat in the trunk? 815 00:59:58,514 --> 00:59:59,597 - Sure thing. 816 01:00:04,156 --> 01:00:06,447 - You look like Caligula. 817 01:00:06,447 --> 01:00:08,030 - Tell me about it. 818 01:00:14,118 --> 01:00:16,285 - Hey, what are you doing? 819 01:00:17,636 --> 01:00:19,792 Oh hey. 820 01:00:19,792 --> 01:00:20,625 Oh God. 821 01:00:22,714 --> 01:00:24,131 Oh Caligula, yes. 822 01:00:26,405 --> 01:00:30,572 Hmm-mm, right, there, Caligula, yes, uhuh, right there. 823 01:00:34,047 --> 01:00:35,380 Right there, oh! 824 01:00:47,002 --> 01:00:48,002 Oh yes, yes! 825 01:00:57,956 --> 01:00:58,789 Oh yes! 826 01:01:16,422 --> 01:01:17,922 - Something wrong? 827 01:01:24,029 --> 01:01:25,270 Are you okay? 828 01:01:25,270 --> 01:01:26,353 - Yeah, yeah. 829 01:01:34,549 --> 01:01:36,216 How did you do that? 830 01:01:37,268 --> 01:01:38,101 - Do what? 831 01:01:39,471 --> 01:01:41,971 - How did you make love to me? 832 01:01:43,239 --> 01:01:44,489 - Are you sure? 833 01:01:45,607 --> 01:01:47,107 - I had an orgasm. 834 01:01:49,216 --> 01:01:52,020 How did you make love to me Caligula. 835 01:01:52,020 --> 01:01:53,603 - The name's Harry. 836 01:01:56,263 --> 01:01:57,948 Was it good? 837 01:01:57,948 --> 01:01:59,698 - Yeah, unbelievable. 838 01:02:03,478 --> 01:02:05,478 How did you do it Harry? 839 01:02:07,413 --> 01:02:11,094 - I don't know, I just looked at you. 840 01:02:11,094 --> 01:02:13,094 I mean you are gorgeous. 841 01:02:14,193 --> 01:02:16,893 Then I concentrated and, that's it. 842 01:02:16,893 --> 01:02:20,075 I mean your guess is as good as mine. 843 01:02:20,075 --> 01:02:22,361 - You just concentrated. 844 01:02:22,361 --> 01:02:24,028 - Just concentrated. 845 01:02:25,096 --> 01:02:27,096 - You just concentrated? 846 01:02:29,239 --> 01:02:30,989 - Just, concentrated. 847 01:02:35,088 --> 01:02:36,599 I didn't offend you did I? 848 01:02:36,599 --> 01:02:37,849 - No, no no no. 849 01:02:39,516 --> 01:02:42,484 An orgasm a day keeps the shrink away. 850 01:02:42,484 --> 01:02:44,600 Where are you headed? 851 01:02:44,600 --> 01:02:45,937 - Hollywood. 852 01:02:45,937 --> 01:02:47,520 - All right get in. 853 01:02:49,108 --> 01:02:49,941 - Thanks. 854 01:03:10,695 --> 01:03:11,528 - Harry? 855 01:03:11,528 --> 01:03:12,361 - Yeah? 856 01:03:13,389 --> 01:03:14,393 - Look at me. 857 01:03:14,393 --> 01:03:15,643 - What's wrong? 858 01:03:17,106 --> 01:03:19,944 - Do you think you could uhm, 859 01:03:19,944 --> 01:03:23,638 concentrate again before we get going? 860 01:03:23,638 --> 01:03:25,203 - Concentrate? 861 01:03:25,203 --> 01:03:26,370 - Concentrate. 862 01:03:27,917 --> 01:03:29,750 - Yeah sure, I'll try. 863 01:03:31,818 --> 01:03:35,985 This car's kinda small, uh, sure you'd be comfortable? 864 01:03:36,994 --> 01:03:39,453 - You just do your thing. 865 01:03:39,453 --> 01:03:41,203 I'll accommodate you. 866 01:04:16,904 --> 01:04:20,237 - Well, those pesky aliens did it again. 867 01:05:16,651 --> 01:05:20,651 - Harry, I'm making you some very strong coffee. 868 01:05:26,263 --> 01:05:28,881 Stop it, can't you see I'm busy. 869 01:05:28,881 --> 01:05:30,214 Oh ask me first. 870 01:05:31,153 --> 01:05:33,153 Oh God not now, oh yeah! 871 01:05:35,214 --> 01:05:36,881 No, not from behind. 872 01:05:38,558 --> 01:05:42,081 Please be courteous, oh God, oh yeah, 873 01:05:42,081 --> 01:05:45,339 son of a bitch, all right, put it right there, 874 01:05:45,339 --> 01:05:47,450 right there, yes, yes. 875 01:05:47,450 --> 01:05:49,200 Oh yeah, oh, oh yeah. 876 01:05:55,599 --> 01:05:57,516 Oh yes, yes right here. 877 01:06:03,473 --> 01:06:04,973 Oh, oh yeah, yeah. 878 01:06:07,739 --> 01:06:11,072 Oh my God, oh my God do that more often. 879 01:06:14,557 --> 01:06:16,724 Please do that more often. 880 01:06:18,652 --> 01:06:20,569 Hmm God more often yes! 881 01:06:21,542 --> 01:06:22,625 - How was it? 882 01:06:25,518 --> 01:06:27,768 - It was okay, it was okay. 883 01:06:30,594 --> 01:06:31,594 It was okay. 884 01:06:32,921 --> 01:06:35,759 How did you do that Harry? 885 01:06:35,759 --> 01:06:36,592 - Do what? 886 01:06:38,085 --> 01:06:40,283 - Don't give me that innocent face. 887 01:06:40,283 --> 01:06:43,200 Spare me, you just made love to me. 888 01:06:44,449 --> 01:06:47,366 - So how was it, after four months? 889 01:06:52,589 --> 01:06:56,756 - It was good, I told you, it was very, very good. 890 01:06:57,987 --> 01:06:59,487 How'd you do that? 891 01:07:00,869 --> 01:07:03,162 How'd you make love to me? 892 01:07:03,162 --> 01:07:04,105 - Me? 893 01:07:04,105 --> 01:07:05,469 - Yeah. 894 01:07:05,469 --> 01:07:06,432 - To you? 895 01:07:06,432 --> 01:07:07,265 - Yeah! 896 01:07:08,178 --> 01:07:10,678 - Nah, you did it to yourself. 897 01:07:11,807 --> 01:07:14,994 - Oh wait, wait, let me get this straight. 898 01:07:14,994 --> 01:07:18,336 So what you're saying is, is that I did this to myself? 899 01:07:20,556 --> 01:07:22,515 So what you're saying is that I was masturbating? 900 01:07:22,515 --> 01:07:23,957 That's what you're saying? 901 01:07:23,957 --> 01:07:26,103 Goddamn son of a bitch Harry, how did you do this, 902 01:07:26,103 --> 01:07:28,011 how did you make love to me? 903 01:07:28,011 --> 01:07:30,595 - You tell me, you were closer. 904 01:07:30,595 --> 01:07:31,512 - Bullshit. 905 01:07:36,292 --> 01:07:37,125 Oh wow. 906 01:07:43,878 --> 01:07:45,323 - What happened? 907 01:07:45,323 --> 01:07:48,906 - I just had the most unbelievable fantasy. 908 01:07:52,660 --> 01:07:56,347 - Fantasies are good for humans, they get off on them. 909 01:07:56,347 --> 01:08:01,176 - Yeah, yeah yeah, wait, where did you get that from? 910 01:08:01,176 --> 01:08:03,560 That sounds really familiar. 911 01:08:03,560 --> 01:08:04,810 - I don't know. 912 01:08:06,662 --> 01:08:09,156 - That phrase rings a bell, I'm gonna look it up 913 01:08:09,156 --> 01:08:10,406 in my magazine. 914 01:08:13,543 --> 01:08:16,043 Fantasies are good for humans. 915 01:08:21,779 --> 01:08:24,616 - Olivia we're gonna be late for work. 916 01:08:24,616 --> 01:08:26,699 - Okay, I'll do it later. 917 01:08:30,604 --> 01:08:34,163 But by the way Harry, I've never masturbated in my life. 918 01:08:34,163 --> 01:08:36,069 - Yeah well try to remember when you were young 919 01:08:36,069 --> 01:08:37,722 and curious. 920 01:08:37,722 --> 01:08:40,302 - Do you mind, I am still young, 921 01:08:40,302 --> 01:08:42,844 I'm just not curious anymore. 922 01:08:42,844 --> 01:08:43,677 - I know. 923 01:08:57,296 --> 01:09:00,087 ♫ I never felt this way before 924 01:09:00,087 --> 01:09:03,695 ♫ He's gone all the way to my core 925 01:09:03,695 --> 01:09:07,211 ♫ I'm coming soon, it's a monsoon 926 01:09:07,211 --> 01:09:09,461 ♫ Wild sex 927 01:09:11,144 --> 01:09:14,409 ♫ Can't you see it in his eyes 928 01:09:14,409 --> 01:09:17,796 ♫ It's an alien in disguise 929 01:09:17,796 --> 01:09:21,401 ♫ He is in control, he's doing it all 930 01:09:21,401 --> 01:09:23,651 ♫ Wild sex 931 01:09:24,870 --> 01:09:27,930 ♫ Wild sex 932 01:09:27,930 --> 01:09:30,680 ♫ Wild, wild sex 933 01:09:36,160 --> 01:09:39,552 ♫ Anyone who goes through this kind of loving 934 01:09:39,552 --> 01:09:43,145 ♫ Never ever'll be the same 935 01:09:43,145 --> 01:09:47,312 ♫ Looks like just 936 01:09:49,860 --> 01:09:51,764 - You sure you didn't pick me up? 937 01:09:51,764 --> 01:09:53,421 - I told you I didn't. 938 01:09:53,421 --> 01:09:56,426 Is the pope Catholic, the balloon broke down, 939 01:09:56,426 --> 01:09:57,915 I told you that. 940 01:09:57,915 --> 01:09:59,442 - You didn't pick me up? 941 01:09:59,442 --> 01:10:02,618 - Why do you keep asking me that Harry? 942 01:10:02,618 --> 01:10:06,637 - I woke up in the desert Sam, dressed in Roman armor, 943 01:10:06,637 --> 01:10:10,830 sandals and sword, I'm talking full gear. 944 01:10:10,830 --> 01:10:12,361 - No shit? 945 01:10:12,361 --> 01:10:15,754 - No shit, I have it my living room. 946 01:10:15,754 --> 01:10:19,144 - And you don't remember a thing? 947 01:10:19,144 --> 01:10:20,561 - Total blackout. 948 01:10:22,969 --> 01:10:25,969 - Blackout, blackouts are the worst. 949 01:10:40,871 --> 01:10:44,476 I'm sure Thousand Ways was disappointed. 950 01:10:44,476 --> 01:10:45,476 No aerobics. 951 01:10:55,474 --> 01:10:57,224 - Sam, do me a favor. 952 01:10:59,280 --> 01:11:00,113 - What? 953 01:11:01,191 --> 01:11:02,774 - Watch this, okay? 954 01:11:04,153 --> 01:11:05,510 - What do you mean. 955 01:11:05,510 --> 01:11:09,677 - Trust me, just watch this and check out what happens. 956 01:11:10,858 --> 01:11:13,275 - What are you talking about? 957 01:11:26,443 --> 01:11:27,276 Wow. 958 01:11:43,680 --> 01:11:44,513 Oh dude. 959 01:11:46,130 --> 01:11:46,963 Wow. 960 01:11:54,006 --> 01:11:54,839 Oh! 961 01:11:59,501 --> 01:12:00,334 Mother! 962 01:12:57,214 --> 01:12:59,389 - What did you see Sam? 963 01:12:59,389 --> 01:13:03,556 - A miracle, forget the bar Harry, you could open a church. 964 01:13:06,694 --> 01:13:08,518 - You are so disgusting I can't believe 965 01:13:08,518 --> 01:13:10,935 I share this planet with you? 966 01:13:12,112 --> 01:13:16,279 - Excuse me, yes, yes, that was for the performance. 967 01:13:19,722 --> 01:13:21,285 And this is for the location. 968 01:13:29,883 --> 01:13:31,643 How did he do that? 969 01:13:31,643 --> 01:13:34,940 - I don't know, he did it to me first, on my kitchen 970 01:13:34,940 --> 01:13:37,190 floor this morning. 971 01:13:37,190 --> 01:13:38,273 - How was it? 972 01:13:43,964 --> 01:13:47,464 - Did you teach him how to do this? 973 01:13:49,682 --> 01:13:54,014 - Ladies, if I knew how to do that, I wouldn't be here, 974 01:13:54,014 --> 01:13:56,845 I'd be at the Miss America pageant. 975 01:14:18,974 --> 01:14:20,307 No one, come on. 976 01:14:24,781 --> 01:14:26,281 - Damn this sucks. 977 01:14:30,403 --> 01:14:32,483 - You have got to tell me how you do them 978 01:14:32,483 --> 01:14:34,816 long distance like that pal. 979 01:14:35,789 --> 01:14:39,956 - I don't know, I just focus in on a good looking babe, 980 01:14:41,555 --> 01:14:42,638 she gets off. 981 01:14:45,166 --> 01:14:48,126 - Harry, I've been focusing on good looking babes 982 01:14:48,126 --> 01:14:51,908 since I was 12 and nothing like that ever happened to me. 983 01:14:51,908 --> 01:14:54,825 - Where did she put the phone book? 984 01:14:58,431 --> 01:15:00,635 - Now what is it, come on? 985 01:15:00,635 --> 01:15:03,052 - Sam, I get these fantasies. 986 01:15:04,533 --> 01:15:07,866 It's sort of like a, like a brain flash. 987 01:15:10,468 --> 01:15:11,635 A neurologist. 988 01:15:13,637 --> 01:15:15,137 That's the ticket. 989 01:15:23,456 --> 01:15:24,413 - Hi there. 990 01:15:24,413 --> 01:15:25,246 - Hi. 991 01:15:33,582 --> 01:15:35,082 - Say hello Harry. 992 01:15:36,668 --> 01:15:40,835 - She's a very young girl Sam, I could go to jail for this. 993 01:15:42,430 --> 01:15:44,800 - Excuse me, who are you? 994 01:15:44,800 --> 01:15:48,300 - Uh, we have an appointment, Harry Smith. 995 01:15:50,021 --> 01:15:53,146 - Oh God, yeah I'm so sorry, I apologize, 996 01:15:53,146 --> 01:15:55,483 we had a little emergency, one of our patients, 997 01:15:55,483 --> 01:15:59,099 he went nuts and my father had to take him to the hospital. 998 01:15:59,099 --> 01:16:00,879 - Yeah well we have an emergency too, let's get 999 01:16:00,879 --> 01:16:02,248 another doctor, come on Sam. 1000 01:16:02,248 --> 01:16:04,073 - Hey, hey wait a minute, what's his problem? 1001 01:16:04,073 --> 01:16:08,655 - Whoa, whoa, all right, uh every babe he looks at 1002 01:16:08,655 --> 01:16:09,822 has an orgasm. 1003 01:16:12,553 --> 01:16:15,941 - Oh really, and how does he do that? 1004 01:16:15,941 --> 01:16:18,450 - Uh, I don't know, I wish I did. 1005 01:16:18,450 --> 01:16:20,420 - Well let me look at him, maybe I can help. 1006 01:16:20,420 --> 01:16:22,503 - No uh, how old are you? 1007 01:16:24,735 --> 01:16:25,568 - 19. 1008 01:16:27,065 --> 01:16:27,982 - 19 Harry. 1009 01:16:29,310 --> 01:16:30,143 - 19? 1010 01:16:32,030 --> 01:16:32,863 - Yeah 19. 1011 01:16:42,976 --> 01:16:43,809 Wow. 1012 01:16:59,100 --> 01:16:59,933 Oh my. 1013 01:17:05,983 --> 01:17:07,983 - Are you, how was that? 1014 01:17:19,924 --> 01:17:20,757 - Well. 1015 01:17:23,556 --> 01:17:25,806 First of all, I'm a virgin. 1016 01:17:27,191 --> 01:17:29,941 - I thought you said you were 19. 1017 01:17:31,813 --> 01:17:33,563 - How did he do that? 1018 01:17:37,393 --> 01:17:40,698 That's ridiculous, scientifically it's impossible, 1019 01:17:40,698 --> 01:17:45,562 there's no way, it, it has to be some sort of telepathy. 1020 01:17:45,562 --> 01:17:46,890 - Telepathy. 1021 01:17:46,890 --> 01:17:48,364 - Yeah. 1022 01:17:48,364 --> 01:17:50,281 - That's it, telepathy. 1023 01:17:51,284 --> 01:17:53,117 Well, can you help us? 1024 01:17:54,133 --> 01:17:57,871 - Well I can examine him, follow me into the lab. 1025 01:17:57,871 --> 01:17:59,038 Come on Harry. 1026 01:18:09,361 --> 01:18:11,119 - Sit him in that chair right over there, okay? 1027 01:18:11,119 --> 01:18:12,006 - That one over there? 1028 01:18:12,006 --> 01:18:12,839 - Yeah. 1029 01:18:12,839 --> 01:18:13,839 - All right. 1030 01:18:15,561 --> 01:18:17,770 There you go Harry. 1031 01:18:17,770 --> 01:18:18,603 - Okay. 1032 01:18:20,010 --> 01:18:22,510 Now Harry, put your head back. 1033 01:18:23,391 --> 01:18:26,602 Don't use your mind on me unless I tell you to, okay? 1034 01:18:26,602 --> 01:18:28,057 Just be a gentleman. 1035 01:18:28,057 --> 01:18:31,574 - Well I'm afraid you're gonna have an orgasm. 1036 01:18:31,574 --> 01:18:33,181 - Just because I'm a virgin doesn't mean 1037 01:18:33,181 --> 01:18:35,127 I don't know what an orgasm is. 1038 01:18:35,127 --> 01:18:36,948 - Yeah well it's one thing to read it out of books 1039 01:18:36,948 --> 01:18:37,926 and it's another thing to really-- 1040 01:18:37,926 --> 01:18:40,304 - I didn't say that I knew it from books. 1041 01:18:42,685 --> 01:18:45,825 Excuse me, but I'm very particular when it comes 1042 01:18:45,825 --> 01:18:48,325 to the audience of my orgasms. 1043 01:18:56,298 --> 01:18:59,548 Okay Dirty Harry go ahead, make my day. 1044 01:19:30,460 --> 01:19:31,377 - You done? 1045 01:19:34,559 --> 01:19:38,650 Well it was good for me, was it good for you? 1046 01:19:41,014 --> 01:19:43,019 - You're disgusting. 1047 01:19:43,019 --> 01:19:44,936 Let me get the reading. 1048 01:19:53,499 --> 01:19:57,648 Wow, the activity in your reproduction center, 1049 01:19:57,648 --> 01:19:59,981 it's awesome, 200,000 units. 1050 01:20:00,962 --> 01:20:03,379 - 200,000 units, what's that? 1051 01:20:04,936 --> 01:20:07,699 - It mean's you're a sex machine is what it means. 1052 01:20:07,699 --> 01:20:09,532 - Shut up Sam! 1053 01:20:10,762 --> 01:20:12,262 What does it mean? 1054 01:20:14,140 --> 01:20:18,140 - Well I don't know, but I know that's it a lot. 1055 01:20:19,562 --> 01:20:20,872 Are you married? 1056 01:20:20,872 --> 01:20:22,017 - Yeah. 1057 01:20:22,017 --> 01:20:25,850 - Oh well what did your wife think about this? 1058 01:20:26,717 --> 01:20:29,476 - She slapped me in the face. 1059 01:20:29,476 --> 01:20:31,226 - She didn't like it? 1060 01:20:32,185 --> 01:20:35,448 - She wasn't the only one that didn't like it. 1061 01:20:35,448 --> 01:20:37,281 - Oh well, that's bad. 1062 01:20:39,472 --> 01:20:40,912 Look, what I think we can do is fix you up with 1063 01:20:40,912 --> 01:20:44,683 a special helmet, can you go into that drawer right there, 1064 01:20:44,683 --> 01:20:47,516 there's the helmet right in there. 1065 01:20:49,732 --> 01:20:50,565 - Wow. 1066 01:20:52,393 --> 01:20:53,726 - Great, thanks. 1067 01:20:54,599 --> 01:20:57,222 This is only temporary until we look into this thing 1068 01:20:57,222 --> 01:21:00,548 further, what this will do, is absorb any of the bio 1069 01:21:00,548 --> 01:21:04,222 impulses emitted from your brain, okay? 1070 01:21:04,222 --> 01:21:05,055 - Hmm-mm. 1071 01:21:06,003 --> 01:21:08,920 - Let's get you strapped in. 1072 01:21:09,983 --> 01:21:10,816 Okay. 1073 01:21:13,293 --> 01:21:14,179 - Can I look at you? 1074 01:21:14,179 --> 01:21:16,096 - Yeah go ahead. 1075 01:21:22,534 --> 01:21:24,878 - Ain't science a bitch. 1076 01:21:28,370 --> 01:21:29,874 - Hey good job. 1077 01:21:29,874 --> 01:21:31,589 - Thank you very much. 1078 01:21:31,589 --> 01:21:32,472 - Very nice. 1079 01:21:32,472 --> 01:21:33,447 - Chill Sam. 1080 01:21:33,447 --> 01:21:36,291 - Chill Sam, you know scientifically 1081 01:21:36,291 --> 01:21:39,134 you are really a very valuable man. 1082 01:21:39,134 --> 01:21:43,301 - Scientifically, you're the hottest chick I ever had. 1083 01:21:44,662 --> 01:21:47,079 - No, no, you didn't have me. 1084 01:21:47,934 --> 01:21:49,684 - Scientifically not. 1085 01:21:50,659 --> 01:21:51,583 But you got off. 1086 01:21:51,583 --> 01:21:54,383 - No, no, no, that was just like some kind 1087 01:21:54,383 --> 01:21:55,864 of fantasy or something. 1088 01:21:55,864 --> 01:21:59,814 - Well as the say, fantasies are good for humans, 1089 01:21:59,814 --> 01:22:01,847 they get off on them. 1090 01:22:01,847 --> 01:22:03,252 - Who says that? 1091 01:22:03,252 --> 01:22:06,502 - I don't know, but it's a good saying. 1092 01:22:24,015 --> 01:22:26,645 - Oh, is that your neighbor? 1093 01:22:26,645 --> 01:22:27,478 - Hmm-mm. 1094 01:22:30,584 --> 01:22:33,417 - Well focus on her, focus on her. 1095 01:22:37,241 --> 01:22:38,741 - Nothing happens. 1096 01:22:40,971 --> 01:22:43,257 - I guess that helmet really works huh? 1097 01:22:43,257 --> 01:22:44,687 - Hmm-mm. 1098 01:22:44,687 --> 01:22:47,088 - Hmm, smashing derriere on that babe. 1099 01:22:47,088 --> 01:22:50,506 You sure you don't wanna take the helmet off? 1100 01:22:50,506 --> 01:22:51,423 - Positive. 1101 01:22:53,579 --> 01:22:56,176 - Not even for a quickie? 1102 01:22:56,176 --> 01:22:58,384 - Forget it Sam, I would never cheat with 1103 01:22:58,384 --> 01:22:59,967 my neighbor, never. 1104 01:23:05,597 --> 01:23:07,014 N-E-V-E-R, never. 1105 01:23:15,736 --> 01:23:17,120 Hi Meg. 1106 01:23:17,120 --> 01:23:18,037 - Hi Harry. 1107 01:23:20,599 --> 01:23:22,551 I'm doing your job. 1108 01:23:22,551 --> 01:23:26,067 - I can see, hey how was your first thing in the morning? 1109 01:23:26,067 --> 01:23:28,733 - It was all right, I had better. 1110 01:23:28,733 --> 01:23:31,906 What's that thing on your head? 1111 01:23:31,906 --> 01:23:35,161 - Oh, this is sort of a high tech condom. 1112 01:23:35,161 --> 01:23:35,994 - A what? 1113 01:23:43,993 --> 01:23:44,826 Oh Harry! 1114 01:23:46,374 --> 01:23:47,457 Oh, oh Harry! 1115 01:23:55,553 --> 01:23:56,720 What was that? 1116 01:23:57,797 --> 01:23:58,797 - A quickie. 1117 01:24:00,424 --> 01:24:03,558 - Phew, do you have any longies? 1118 01:24:03,558 --> 01:24:07,725 - Out of stock gorgeous, Olivia would kick my butt. 1119 01:24:09,259 --> 01:24:10,259 - Bye Harry. 1120 01:24:16,787 --> 01:24:18,120 - I'm over here. 1121 01:24:23,456 --> 01:24:24,289 Hey. 1122 01:24:27,321 --> 01:24:28,638 - What'cha doing? 1123 01:24:28,638 --> 01:24:30,628 - Doing my homework? 1124 01:24:30,628 --> 01:24:33,071 Is this the helmet that the doctor came up with? 1125 01:24:33,071 --> 01:24:36,883 - Actually it was the doctor's daughter she did a great job. 1126 01:24:36,883 --> 01:24:37,776 - She did huh? 1127 01:24:37,776 --> 01:24:38,609 - Hmm-mm. 1128 01:24:38,609 --> 01:24:40,727 - And what did you do to her? 1129 01:24:40,727 --> 01:24:44,144 - Well, the girl took it, scientifically. 1130 01:24:45,095 --> 01:24:49,883 - Poor child, I can imagine what she must've gone through. 1131 01:24:49,883 --> 01:24:52,884 You are such a pervert Harry. 1132 01:24:52,884 --> 01:24:54,179 - She said she liked it. 1133 01:24:54,179 --> 01:24:56,932 - Did she, did she really? - Yeah, yeah. 1134 01:24:56,932 --> 01:24:58,478 - Yeah, yeah? - Yeah. 1135 01:24:58,478 --> 01:25:02,327 - The little bitch. 1136 01:25:02,327 --> 01:25:03,494 - Very bitter. 1137 01:25:04,743 --> 01:25:07,365 - Look do me a favor, don't take the helmet off, 1138 01:25:07,365 --> 01:25:10,500 because I don't wanna get laid by your imagination again. 1139 01:25:10,500 --> 01:25:12,014 - My imagination. 1140 01:25:12,014 --> 01:25:15,408 - Yes, I found out in my files that you suffer 1141 01:25:15,408 --> 01:25:18,114 from a very strong sexual hunger. 1142 01:25:18,114 --> 01:25:19,044 - So? 1143 01:25:19,044 --> 01:25:22,548 - So I'm gonna take care of you right now. 1144 01:25:22,548 --> 01:25:25,048 Yeah, just sit back and relax. 1145 01:25:52,606 --> 01:25:55,023 You can take your helmet off. 1146 01:26:05,195 --> 01:26:06,278 - Am I cured? 1147 01:26:07,564 --> 01:26:10,445 - Your sexual hunger is gone. 1148 01:26:10,445 --> 01:26:11,888 - Forever? 1149 01:26:11,888 --> 01:26:14,053 - For a few days. 1150 01:26:14,053 --> 01:26:16,303 - Oh, okay, for a few days. 1151 01:26:17,909 --> 01:26:18,742 Then what? 1152 01:26:19,718 --> 01:26:21,741 - Then I'm gonna make love to you again, 1153 01:26:21,741 --> 01:26:24,063 and you'll be all right for a few days. 1154 01:26:24,063 --> 01:26:26,813 - Hmm, that's healthy, then what? 1155 01:26:28,436 --> 01:26:30,552 - And then I'm gonna make love to you again, 1156 01:26:30,552 --> 01:26:32,703 and you'll be all right for a few more days. 1157 01:26:32,703 --> 01:26:36,870 - Geez, I'm gonna be one of the healthiest guys around. 1158 01:26:37,784 --> 01:26:39,923 Did you learn this in one of them UFO books? 1159 01:26:39,923 --> 01:26:43,251 - Hah, I found the article that I was looking for. 1160 01:26:43,251 --> 01:26:46,834 It says that fantasies are good for humans. 1161 01:26:49,968 --> 01:26:51,885 Unless they're married. 1162 01:27:02,077 --> 01:27:04,048 ♫ How could you do that 1163 01:27:04,048 --> 01:27:07,949 ♫ And smile when I'm crying 1164 01:27:07,949 --> 01:27:10,110 ♫ How could you do that 1165 01:27:10,110 --> 01:27:14,371 ♫ And smile when I'm crying 1166 01:27:14,371 --> 01:27:16,315 ♫ How could you do that 1167 01:27:16,315 --> 01:27:20,478 ♫ And smile when I'm crying 1168 01:27:20,478 --> 01:27:22,594 ♫ How could you do that 1169 01:27:22,594 --> 01:27:26,261 ♫ And smile when I'm crying 1170 01:27:52,097 --> 01:27:55,404 ♫ Time we have spent together 1171 01:27:55,404 --> 01:27:58,430 ♫ Now what's that feel back there 1172 01:27:58,430 --> 01:28:02,597 ♫ Now where are 1173 01:28:04,100 --> 01:28:06,140 ♫ How could you do that 1174 01:28:06,140 --> 01:28:09,999 ♫ And smile when I'm crying 1175 01:28:09,999 --> 01:28:12,240 ♫ How could you do that 1176 01:28:12,240 --> 01:28:16,370 ♫ And smile when I'm crying 1177 01:28:16,370 --> 01:28:18,447 ♫ How could you do that 1178 01:28:18,447 --> 01:28:22,579 ♫ And smile when I'm crying 1179 01:28:22,579 --> 01:28:24,736 ♫ How could you do that 1180 01:28:24,736 --> 01:28:28,403 ♫ And smile when I'm crying 1181 01:28:32,996 --> 01:28:36,913 ♫ Oh no, how could you do that 1182 01:28:41,218 --> 01:28:43,445 ♫ How could you do that 1183 01:28:43,445 --> 01:28:47,112 ♫ And smile when I'm crying 1184 01:28:48,066 --> 01:28:52,233 ♫ You're smiling, how could you do this to me 77861

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