Original subtitles

Downloaded from YTS.MX

[soft piano]

Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX

♪

- THE BRAVE, HANDSOME KNIGHT

ASKED THE BEAUTIFUL YOUNG PRINCESS

IF SHE WOULD MARRY HIM

SO THEY COULD LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER.

"OF COURSE I WILL," SAID THE PRINCESS.

"YOU'RE THE MOST PERFECT MAN IN ALL THE WORLD.

"AND NOW THAT I FOUND YOU,

WE CAN LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER."

[alarm beeping]

- ♪ HEY HEY HEY HEY

♪ HEY HEY HEY HEY

♪ HEY HEY HEY HEY

- ♪ WHERE MY GIRLS AT, WHERE MY GIRLS AT ♪

♪ WHERE MY GIRLS AT, WHERE MY, WHERE MY GIRLS AT ♪

♪ WHERE MY GIRLS AT,WHERE MY GIR

♪ WHERE MY GIRLS AT, WHERE MY, WHERE MY GIRLS AT ♪

♪ YOU'RE INDEPENDENT AND YOU HANDLE YOUR B-I ♪

♪ DON'T NEED HIM BUT YOU WANT A MAN ♪

♪ TO HOLD YOU DOWN

♪ PAY YOUR OWN BILL, DO IT YOUR WAY ♪

♪ STAY CLASSY, LET HIM KNOW YOU DON'T PLAY ♪

♪ LET ME SEE YOU STAND UP STAND UP ♪

♪ IF YOU PLAN TO PLAY, THEN PUT YOUR HANDS UP ♪

♪ HANDS UP, ALL MY SINGLE LADIES ♪

♪ PUT YOUR HANDS UP, HANDS UP ♪

♪ YOU CAN SING ALONG WITH ME, OH OH OH OH ♪

♪ OH OH OH OH

♪ GONNA WAKE UP, GONNA MAKE A NEW DAY ♪

- ♪ YEAH - ♪ GONNA GET UP

♪ GONNA FIND A NEW WAY

- ♪ YEAH - ♪ GONNA GET HIM

♪ GONNA MAKE HIM JUST RIGHT - ♪ YEAH

♪ GONNA GET HIM, GONNA MAKE HIM ALL MINE ♪

♪ INDEPENDENT, AND YOU HANDLE YOUR B-I ♪

♪ DON'T NEED HIM, BUT YOU WANT A MAN ♪

♪ TO HOLD YOU DOWN

♪ PAY YOUR OWN BILL, DO IT YOUR WAY ♪

♪ STAY CLASSY, LET HIM KNOW YOU DON'T PLAY ♪

♪ LET ME SEE YOU STAND UP STAND UP ♪

♪ IF YOU PLAN TO PLAY, THEN PUT YOUR HANDS UP ♪

- SHE'S COMING. SHE'S COMING. COMING.

- ♪ ALL MY SINGLE LADIES PUT YOUR HANDS UP ♪

- ONE, TWO, THREE--

both: [giggling]

- ♪ YOU'RE INDEPENDENT AND YOU HANDLE B-I ♪

♪ DON'T NEED HIM, BUT YOU WANT A MAN ♪

[dinging]

- HI. MISS FISCHER, WHAT CAN I DO FOR YOU TODAY?

- OKAY. SO THESE, UM, LINEN PANTS

I NEED WITH A FULL CREASE.

AND THEN THESE PALAZZOS

I NEEDED THE CREASE STARTING MID-THIGH.

AND ON THESE CROPPED BLACK PANTS,

I NEED NO CREASE AT ALL.

BUT IF IT'S THE SILK, THEN IT'S THE OTHER WAY AROUND.

AND ON THIS ONE, IT NEEDS A BUTTON.

BUT I DON'T LIKE THE PARALLEL STITCH.

I LIKE THE "X."

HI, TIM. - HEY.

YOU'RE RIGHT ON TIME, AS ALWAYS.

- HMM.

- LARGE NONFAT HALF-CAF LATTE,

EXTRA SPLASH OF CAF.

- GREAT, AS ALWAYS. - ALL RIGHT.

- THE JOB IS ASSISTANT TO THE CHILDREN'S EDITOR.

- WELL, I'VE DONE A LOT OF CREATIVE WRITING,

AND I CONSIDER MYSELF VERY ORGANIZED.

- OH, EXCELLENT.

- AND SINCE I MINORED IN PSYCHOLOGY,

I FEEL LIKE I'M VERY EQUIPPED

TO DEAL WITH A LOT OF DIFFERENT PERSONALITIES.

- YOU KNOW WHAT, I THINK YOU'RE PERFECT FOR THE JOB.

- THE PEPPERCORN? VINAIGRETTE.

- YEAH. THAT SOUNDS GOOD.

- THANK YOU. - THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

- PENNY FOR YOUR THOUGHTS.

- TEN BUCKS, AND YOU'RE ON.

- NO, I'M SERIOUS, JAMIE.

I MEAN, WE'VE BEEN DATING QUITE A WHILE,

AND I FEEL LIKE I BARELY KNOW YOU.

- WHAT DO YOU MEAN? I'M AN OPEN BOOK.

- YEAH, WITH A LOT OF BLANK PAGES.

HA HA! - [chuckles]

OKAY. I REALLY LIKE YOU, SARAH.

YOU'RE KIND AND CONSIDERATE AND--

- BUT...

- BUT, FRANKLY, I'VE BEEN AFRAID

THAT IF YOU KNEW THE REAL ME,

THEN YOU'D DISAPPROVE, AND THAT WOULD BE THAT.

- YOU DON'T HAVE TO TELL ME YOUR DEEPEST, DARKEST SECRETS.

- YOU MIND IF I SMOKE? - YOU DON'T SMOKE.

- SEE, BUT I DO. THREE PACKS A DAY.

THE REASON WHY I'VE BEEN HIDING IT

IS BECAUSE NONSMOKERS HATE SMOKERS,

AND I DIDN'T WANT TO OFFEND YOU.

- I HAD NO IDEA.

YOU KNOW WHAT? Y--

YOU SMOKE. YEAH.

YEAH, LIGHT UP. SURE.

- OHH...THAT IS SO GOOD.

- [coughs lightly]

- ANOTHER CHARDONNAY?

- NO, NO, NO.

MY LIMIT IS ONE.

- UH...ME TOO.

ON SECOND THOUGHT, MAYBE I WILL HAVE ANOTHER DRINK.

DOUBLE BOURBON, NEAT. - YOU GOT IT.

- WOW. YOU SAID YOU HARDLY DRINK.

- I TOTALLY LIED. I DRINK ALL THE TIME.

EXCEPT FOR WHEN I'M AROUND YOU.

- OH. - SORRY, SARAH.

THIS IS HOW I NUMB THE PAIN.

- [sneezes]

- I KNEW IT. YOU HATE ME NOW.

- NO-- [coughs]

WHOO.

JUST ALLERGIC TO YOUR... [coughs]

CREDIT CARD.

YOU DROPPED YOUR CREDIT CARD. - OH--UH--

- IT'S MY-- IT'S MY CREDIT CARD.

- YEAH. I TOOK IT WHEN YOU WENT TO THE LADIES' ROOM.

- YOU WENT INTO MY PURSE? - I'M KIND OF A KLEPTOMANIAC.

I-I WAS GONNA GIVE THAT BACK TO YOU.

- I'M TELLING YOU, CHLOE, IT IS A WAR OUT THERE.

NO. THE MEN I MEET--

THEY ARE ALL SO DEFICIENT.

THEY ARE FUN, BUT THEY ARE POOR.

THEY ARE SUCCESSFUL, BUT THEY'RE BIPOLAR.

THEY'RE HANDSOME,

BUT THEY'RE CHAIN-SMOKING KLEPTOMANIACS

WITH FAMILY AND ALCOHOL ISSUES.

- WELL, SIS... NOBODY'S PERFECT.

- YOU FOUND YOURS!

WHERE'S MINE?

- YOU JUST NEED TO BE PATIENT.

HE'LL SHOW UP WHEN YOU LEAST EXPECT IT.

I JUST LUCKED OUT.

- I AM TIRED OF LEAVING THINGS UP TO CHANCE!

YOU KNOW, WHEN IT COMES TO MEN...

I HAVE TO TAKE MORE CONTROL.

- LOOK, LOVE IS NOT ABOUT CONTROL.

IT'S ABOUT CHEMISTRY.

NOW, WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO?

WRITE UP ONE OF YOUR FAMOUS LISTS?

"QUALIFICATIONS FOR THE MAN I WILL MARRY.

NO EXCEPTIONS." - YES. YES!

YOU'RE A GENIUS!

- I WAS JOKING. - I'M NOT.

I'M GONNA MAKE A LIST--

A NONNEGOTIABLE LIST OF TRAITS A GUY HAS TO HAVE,

OR HE'S OUT FROM THE GET-GO.

NO MORE CHASING MR. WRONG.

- NO. NO, SARAH. NO LISTS.

THAT'S JUST WAY TOO EXTREME.

DO YOU REMEMBER WHAT PASTOR JAMES SAID

ABOUT TRUE LOVE WHEN WE WERE KIDS?

HE SAID "BE PATIENT. DON'T BE ANXIOUS OR WORRIED.

GOD WANTS US TO PROSPER,

AND HE WILL DELIVER A LOVE FAR MORE WONDERFUL

THAN WE CAN EVER DREAM."

- I'M MAKING A LIST.

QUALIFICATIONS FOR THE MAN I'LL MARRY.

NO...EXCEPTIONS.

ONE. MUST LOVE HIS FAMILY.

TWO. MUST HAVE A GOOD JOB.

HI, BABY.

MUST...LOVE ANIMALS.

MUST NOT

EAT RED MEAT.

OH. NO BLING.

NO PIERCINGS.

NO DREADLOCKS.

NO SLOGAN T-SHIRTS.

HONEST.

HANDSOME. ATHLETIC.

A GOOD COOK.

[whimpering] OH...OH...

NO.

MUST...CRY...

[man laughing] SHH!

AT MOVIES.

MUST BE... OH...OH!

A SAFE DRIVER.

NO SMOKING.

ONE DRINK A DAY PER LIMIT

AND NICE FEET.

YES.

- FORGET THE TEN COMMANDMENTS.

YOU'VE GOT, UH...

[laughs] 19?

- 22. THIS IS A WAR.

- NO BLING? - MM-MM.

- WHO'D YOU HAVE A DATE WITH, A RAPPER?

HONEY, HONESTLY,

THERE ARE A LOT MORE IMPORTANT THINGS TO WORRY ABOUT.

- EVERYTHING COUNTS, CHLOE.

THIS IS MY VERSION OF SPEED DATING.

- ♪ I DO WHATEVER I LIKE

♪ I AM A INDEPENDENT WOMAN

♪ AND I DO MY OWN THING BUT

♪ I WANT SOME LOVE IN MY LIFE ♪

♪ I SAID LOVE LOVE LOVE

♪ I WANT SOME LOVE IN MY LIFE ♪

- ONE KONA ERUPTION.

FULL-BODIED BUT LIGHT-FOOTED,

WITH A BOLD, KICKY TANG.

ANOTHER FRED JONES SPECIALTY DRINK ORIGINAL.

AND IF YOU HATE IT,

YOU CAN HAVE WHATEVER YOU WANT ON THE HOUSE.

- MM. YOU KNOW, THIS IS GOOD.

HOW'D YOU KNOW I'D LIKE IT?

- WELL, THEY DON'T CALL ME THE COFFEE PSYCHIC FOR NOTHING.

- [giggles] THANK YOU.

- HEY, PRETTY LADY!

THIS IS FOR YOU.

[playing bluesy harmonica chords]

♪

[light end notes]

WHAT CAN I DO YOU FOR?

- UH, UM... WHERE--WHERE'S TIM?

- TIM QUIT. - OH!

WHO ARE YOU? - FRED.

AKA, THE NEW BOSS.

THE BIG KAHUNAS BROUGHT ME IN TO SAVE L.A. CITY COFFEE

FROM GOING THE WAY OF THE BRONTOSAURUS.

- OKAY. UM...CAN I HAVE A LARGE NONFAT

HALF-CAF LATTE, PLEASE?

EXTRA SHOT OF CAF.

- [sucking in air] I DON'T THINK SO.

- I'M SORRY, EXCUSE ME?

- I THINK YOU NEED THE SPICY STYLINGS

OF ONE OF MY SUMATRAN SLINGS. - OH, UH, NO, REALLY.

THANK YOU, BUT I'D JUST LIKE A LARGE NONFAT HALF-CAF LATTE.

- COFFEE CONNECTION IS THAT WAY. GRINDHOUSE IS AROUND THE CORNER.

GODSPEED.

- EXCUSE M--OKAY.

I'M GONNA SAY IT AGAIN.

I WOULD LIKE A LARGE NONFAT HALF-CAF LATTE

FOR HERE, PLEASE.

- AND I'M GONNA TELL YOU ONE MORE TIME...

YOU DRINK WHAT I RECOMMEND, OR YOU DON'T DRINK AT ALL.

- OH! - OH, EXCUSE ME, I--

A-ARE YOU ALL RIGHT? - ME?

I-I'M OKAY. YEAH.

HE'S NUTS, AND I HAVEN'T HAD MY COFFEE THIS MORNING,

BUT...I'M OKAY.

- UM...I-I'M ERIK.

WITH A "K."

- I'M SARAH WITH AN "H".

[both chuckling]

- CAN I GET YOU THAT COFFEE? - SURE. YEAH.

- YOU'RE RIGHT ABOUT THAT GUY.

I ENDED UP WITH SOMETHING CALLED A BUONGIORNO SUPREMO.

STILL COULDN'T GET WHAT YOU WANTED.

- IT'S OKAY. I'LL JUST HAVE WATER.

- ACTUALLY, I HAD HIM MAKE ME A BLACK COFFEE CHASER.

TOLD HIM IT WAS FOR ME FOR LATER.

- OH. - YOU WANT IT?

- THANKS. - CHEERS.

MM. WOW, THAT'S SUPERB.

YOU WANT TO TAST - NO, THANK YOU, I'M FINE.

- YEAH, SO ANYWAY, AT FIRST I THOUGHT I WAS GONNA BE A VET

JUST 'CAUSE I LOVE ANIMALS SO MUCH,

BUT I REALIZED I COULD PROBABLY DO MORE GOOD FOR KIDS,

SO I WENT INTO PEDIATRICS,

AND NOW I WORK OVER AT COUNTY GENERAL.

I LEAVE TOWN ON WEEKENDS SOMETIMES FOR SPECIAL SURGERIES.

- SOUNDS AMAZING. - HOW YOU KIDS DOING?

HOW WAS THAT SUPREMO? - OH, IT'S OUTSTANDING.

THANKS FOR THE RECOMMENDATION. - NO PROBLEM.

SOMETIMES YOU GOTTA TELL THE PEOPLE WHAT THEY WANT.

OTHERWISE... HOW ARE THEY GONNA KNOW?

- WHAT ABOUT IF THEY ALREADY KNOW WHAT THEY WANT

BUT THEY CAN'T HAVE IT?

- LOOKS LIKE SOMEBODY'S GETTING EXACTLY...WHAT THEY WANT.

- [laughs]

SO THESE ARE MY PARENTS.

- MM-HMM. - AND THAT'S MY SISTER CHLOE.

SHE'S LIKE MY BEST FRIEND.

THAT'S HER HUSBAND STU AND THEIR TWO GREAT KIDS

ALLIE AND HENRY.

- YOU'RE LUCKY YOUR FAMILY'S SO NEARBY.

MINE ARE ALL BACK IN D.C.--

MY PARENTS, MY BROTHERS, MY COUSINS.

- ARE YOU CLOSE?

- [laughs] UH, YOU KNOW HOW THEY SAY

YOU CAN PICK YOUR FRIENDS BUT YOU CAN'T PICK YOUR FAMILY?

I DEFINITELY PICK MY FAMILY.

- OH... [giggles]

- THIS ONE TIME, MY BROTHER MIKE AND ME--

WE'RE REALLY CLOSE, KINDA LIKE YOU AND YOUR SISTER.

[talking under music]

♪

[record scratches]

- IF YOU TWO SPEND ANY MORE TIME HERE,

I'M GONNA HAVE TO ASK FOR A MAJOR CREDIT CARD.

- [gasps] WE'VE BEEN TALKING HERE FOR THREE HOURS.

- [laughs] IT FELT LIKE THREE MINUTES.

- ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR A SMOKE?

- NO. - I-I DON'T SMOKE.

- NO, NO, ME EITHER, BUT HOW RUDE WOULD IT BE

IF I ASKED YOU TO COME OUTSIDE AND WATCH ME PLAY HARMONICA?

[playing random notes]

- ACTUALLY, I HAVE TO GO.

I VOLUNTEER SATURDAYS AT A HOMELESS SHELTER DOWNTOWN.

WOULD YOU LIKE TO GET TOGETHER SOMETIME...

FOR A REAL DATE?

- YES. YES. SURE.

UM...I HAVE A CARD.

IT'S MY EMAIL AND MY WORK NUMBER.

- GREAT. SARAH WITH AN "H."

- YEAH.

- I'LL CALL. - OKAY.

BYE.

[harmonica playing]

♪

GOOD TIMES?

- ARE YOU ALWAYS THIS IRRITATING?

- ONLY IN THE BEGINNING. YOU'LL GET USED TO ME.

[dog barking]

- NOT MUCH OF A DOG PERSON, HUH?

- NO, I GOT BIT WHEN I WAS A KID.

THEY KINDA FREAK ME OUT. DON'T GET ME STARTED ON CATS.

- DON'T WORRY. I WON'T.

- Y'ALL COME BACK NOW, YA HEAR?

- MORNING, GLORIA.

BROUGHT YOU A LITTLE CARROT BANANA MUFFIN.

- OH. FORGET THE CUPCAKES, GIRL.

YOU JUST GOT FLOWERS. - [gasps] OH! WHAT?

I WONDER WHO THEY'RE FROM.

- GO SEE!

- "DINNER, MY PLACE, SATURDAY NIGHT. ERIK."

OH!

[dog barking]

[dog barking]

- HEY.

OH!

- HEY, SHAKESPEARE, HEY, SIT.

- OH! - SHAKESPEARE...

- SHAKESPEARE, HUH?

- YEAH, WELL, MY FAVORITE WRITER.

- THAT'S IMPRESSIVE.

- OKAY! HERE WE GO.

COPPER RIVER SALMON,

ENCRUSTED WITH FRESH HERBS FROM MY GARDEN,

VEGETABLE RISOTTO, AND ORGANIC BABY GREENS

WITH GOAT CHEESE AND PINE NUTS.

- WOW, Y-Y-- YOU COOKED ALL OF THIS YOURSELF?

- USED A STOVE AND EVERYTHING.

OH, BY THE WAY, THE SALMON'S WILD.

NONE OF THAT MERCURY AND HORMONE-LOADED

FARM-RAISED STUFF.

- WHERE DO YOU STAND ON RED MEAT?

- AS FAR AWAY AS I CAN.

- NONFAT HALF-CAF LATTE.

AM I RIGHT? - YES.

- THERE YOU GO.

- CAN I ASK YOU A PERSONAL QUESTION?

- YEAH, OF COURSE.

- HOW ARE YOU STILL SINGLE?

- [laughs] HAVE YOU BEEN TALKING TO MY MOTHER?

WELL...AH, IT'S JUST, YOU KNOW,

BETWEEN MED SCHOOL AND MY RESIDENCY

AND THEN JUMPING HEADFIRST INTO THE PEDIATRIC SURGERY POOL,

I HAVEN'T HAD MUCH TIME FOR RELATIONSHIPS.

MOSTLY THOUGH, I THINK,

IT'S CAUSE I HAVEN'T MET THE RIGHT WOMAN.

- THERE'S NO WAY I CAN MAKE THIS ANY EASIER,

SO I WON'T EVEN TRY.

WE DID OUR BEST, BUT I'M AFRAID THE SURGERY WAS A WASH.

- WHAT ARE YOU SAYING?

- I'M SAYING YOU CAN EXPECT A GRADUAL ONSET

OF MORE SERIOUS SYMPTOMS, BUT AS SOON AS YOU HEAL,

YOU CAN ENJOY A RELATIVELY NORMAL LIFE.

- UNTIL... - YES, UNTIL.

NOTHING TO BE DONE, OLD BOY. SORRY.

- HAVE YOU TALKED TO MY FAMILY?

- NO, NOT YET. PER YOUR INSTRUCTIONS...

- SO HE'S HANDSOME, GREAT BODY, AMAZING COOK.

CRIES AT STEEL MAGNOLIAS.

NO--OWNS STEEL MAGNOLIAS.

HA. YOU SURE THIS GUY BATS RIGHTY?

- YOU ARE SUCH A CYNIC, CHLOE.

I TOLD YOU, HE JUST HASN'T MET THE RIGHT WOMAN YET.

- I AM JUST PROTECTING MY YOUNGER SISTER, THAT'S ALL.

IT'S PART OF THE JOB DESCRIPTION.

- OHH... GOOD-BYE, CHLOE.

- [laughs] BYE.

Fred: THANK YOU. - YEAH, SURE.

- HEY! YOU READY FOR MY SUMATRAN SLING?

- NO. I WANT A NONFAT HALF-CAF LATTE.

I'VE BEEN HAVING IT EVERY MORNING

FOR THE LAST TWO YEARS.

- THAT'S WHY YOU NEED A CHANGE. - I DON'T WANT A CHANGE.

LISTEN, I'M GONNA ASK YOU ONE MORE TIME,

AND THEN I'M NEVER COMING BACK.

YOU GOING TO GIVE ME WHAT I WANT...OR NOT?

- ABSOLUTELY...POSITIVELY...

DEFINITELY...NOT.

- I DON'T KNOW HOW YOU EXPECT TO KEEP YOUR BUSINESS

WITH NERVE LIKE THAT.

- HERE WE GO.

ONE LARGE NONFAT HALF-CAF LATTE.

ENJOY IT, DUDE.

YOU MISS ME?

- WHY DOES HE GET TO HAVE THAT AND I DON'T?

- WELL, BECAUSE THAT BORING DRINK

SUITS HIS BUTTONED-DOWN CIVIL SERVANT BUTT--NOT YOURS.

- WHAT BUSINESS IS IT OF YOURS WHAT COFFEE I DRINK?

- COFFEE IS MY BUSINESS,

AND I WON'T LET MY CUSTOMERS SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS

THAN THE EXACT RIGHT CUP O' JOE.

- YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED MY MORNING.

JUST GIVE ME SOMETHING-- ANYTHING.

- SIT HERE. YOU'RE GONNA LOVE IT.

PRESENTING, FROM THE VOLCANIC SLOPES OF INDONESIA,

THE SUMATRAN SLING.

SURPRISINGLY COMPLEX BUT WITH A DELICATE BALANCE

OF SWEETNESS AND ACIDITY...

JUST LIKE ME.

SO YOU'RE WAITING FOR THAT GUY?

- WHAT GUY?

- BOUNGIORNO SUPREMO. YOU KNOW, SUPERMAN.

- IF YOU'RE SPEAKING OF ERIK, NO, I AM NOT WAITING FOR HIM.

WHO ARE YOU AGAIN? - FRED. FRED JONES.

- SARAH FISCHER.

- DRINK UP, SARAH FISCHER.

- WITH YOU STANDING HERE WATCHING ME?

- SO YOU REALLY LIKE THIS GUY? - YES. I LIKE HIM VERY MUCH.

- YOU KNOW, THE LAST PLACE I WORKED,

THE OWNERS BOUGHT THIS, UH,

STATE-OF-THE-ART ESPRESSO MACHINE.

YOU KNOW WHAT?

DIDN'T REALLY MAKE ANY BETTER COFFEE

THAN THE BEAT UP CHEAPO VERSION THEY REPLACED.

- YOUR POINT?

- JUST THAT NOTHING IS EVER AS PERFECT

AS IT SEEMS.

HEY! WHAT ABOUT YOUR SUMATRAN SLING?

- NO. YOU'VE ALREADY MADE ME LATE FOR WORK.

I'VE GOTTA GO.

UH...NO SMOKING.

ONE DRINK LIMIT.

GOOD COOK. OWNS OWN HOME.

READS BOOKS.

MUST CRY AT MOVIES.

HEE HEE HEE.

TABITHA, I THINK WE HIT THE MOTHER LODE.

[meow]

- HERE YOU GO, GUYS.

WELL, IF IT ISN'T SARAH SMILE.

- HI, FRED.

- WHAT'S SHAKIN'?

YOU READY FOR THAT SUMATRAN SLING?

- I KNOW WHAT YOU WERE TRYING TO DO THE OTHER DAY

WHEN YOU WERE TELLING ME THE STORY

ABOUT THE ESPRESSO MACHINE.

- IT WAS JUST A STORY.

- WELL, I DON'T APPRECIATE IT.

YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ME.

YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT'S PERFECT AND WHAT'S NOT.

- YOU AND SUPERMAN HAVE A HOT WEEKEND?

- AS A MATTER OF FACT, WE DID.

FLEW UP TO SAN FRANCISCO IN A PRIVATE PLANE.

- SWEET. YOU MEET THE PARENTS YET?

- NO... WHY?

- NO REASON. JUST ASKIN'.

- I'M NOT AVOIDING IT. - OKAY.

- WHAT MAKES YOU THINK YOU'RE SO ALL-KNOWING ANYWAY?

- LOOK...THE REASON I UNDERSTAND THE RIGHT COFFEE DRINK

IS BECAUSE I UNDERSTAND PEOPLE,

AND VICE VERSA.

- AND WHATEVER THAT MEANS.

- IT'S NOW OR NEVER.

ARE YOU READY TO PARTAKE OF THIS NECTAR OF THE GODS...

OR NOT?

- IT'S FINE.

- HA!

HA HA HA!

[sarcastically] FINE!

- SO, ERIK...

PEDIATRICS MUST BE A REWARDING PROFESSION.

- OH, ABSOLUTELY.

NO, GETTING TO HELP KIDS IS INCREDIBLY GRATIFYING.

'CAUSE KIDS ARE THE BEST!

- ME TOO? - YEAH. YOU TOO.

- YOU'RE NICE. I HOPE MY AUNT SARAH KEEPS YOU.

SHE DOESN'T KEEP ANYBODY. - OH.

- OH. - I THINK WHAT ALLIE

MEANS TO SAY IS THAT SARAH'S VERY...SELECTIVE.

THAT'S ALL.

- NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT. JUST DEPENDS ON WHO YOU SELECT.

- DON'T BURN THE HAMBURGERS, HONEY!

THEY WON'T ASK YOU TO GRILL AGAIN!

- RIGHT. - MY HUSBAND WOULD TAKE OVER

THE GRILL AT ANY RESTAURANT IF THEY'D LET HIM.

- A GRILLING MAN IS A HAPPY MAN, RIGHT, STU?

- SO TRUE. I MEAN, COME ON...

- OH, MY... WHOA! WHOA!

- OH, MY... - OH, MY...

- DADDY! - KIDS, STAY THERE.

- KIDS, KIDS, STAY BACK.

- HELP! AAH! AAH!

- HONEY! - ALL RIGHT, STAY CALM.

STAY CALM. TAKE THIS OFF.

STOP FLAILING. - DON'T FLAIL!

- ALL RIGHT, HERE WE GO. - LET ERIK HANDLE IT!

- HIT THAT APRON, WOULD YA?

- OH... - SWEETHEART?

- [panting] - ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?

- I AM NOW.

ERIK, YOU JUST ABOUT SAVED MY LIFE.

- WELL, YOU'RE LUCKY. IT'S JUST A MINOR BURN.

- NO, WE'RE LUCKY WE HAVE A DOCTOR AROUND.

- THEY USUALLY JUST HAVE AN ACCOUNTANT AROUND.

- NAW, YOU'RE GREAT IN A TAX EMERGENCY, STUEY.

- WELL, UNFORTUNATELY, THE BURGERS ARE RUINED.

SO MUCH FOR THE DINNER. - WELL, NOT SO FAST.

YOU HAVE ANY PASTA?

- YOU JUST-- YOU JUST WHIPPED THIS UP.

THIS WOULD HAVE TAKEN ME HOURS.

- AH, IT'S NOTHING.

HAD EVERYTHING I NEEDED IN THE FRIDGE.

- THIS IS THE BEST PASTA I EVER ATE

IN MY WHOLE, ENTIRE LIFE. - WOW!

- YOURS USED TO BE MY FAVORITE, AUNT SARAH,

BUT NOT ANYMORE.

- SARAH, MAYBE YOUR NEW BEAU

CAN GIVE YOU A LESSON OR TWO AROUND THE KITCHEN.

- SARAH DOESN'T NEED MY HELP.

SHE'S A TERRIFIC COOK ALL BY HERSELF.

- NAPKIN.

[giggling]

- UH, WELL, I THINK THAT MOM AND DAD

ARE JUST ABOUT READY TO ADOPT ERIK.

THEY CAN'T STOP TALKING ABOUT HIM.

- AND, UH... WHAT DO YOU THINK?

- WELL, THESE ARE JUST THE EARLY RETURNS,

BUT I THINK THAT HE MAY BE THE BEST GUY

YOU'VE BROUGHT HOME SINCE, UH...

BOBBY MARCIANO.

- BOBBY MARCIANO WAS IN THE EIGHTH GRADE.

- MM.

WELL, THEN, I GUESS IT'S TRUE.

YOU HAVE DATED A LOT OF LOSERS.

- OH. KEEP DRINKING THERE.

YEAH, ERIK,

HE IS--HE'S-- HE'S PRETTY WONDERFUL.

- EXCEPT?

- EXCEPT--EXCEPT WHAT? EXCEPT--EXCEPT NOTHING.

HE'S GREAT.

- OKAY. - OH!

OH, NO. - WHAT?

OH! - WHAT?

- THAT'S--THIS--THIS--THIS GUY-- - WHO?

- THIS--THIS GUY THAT WORKS AT L.A. COFFEE.

OH, GOD, I HOPE HE DOESN'T SEE ME.

- HEY! YO! SARAH!

YO!

COME ON OVER! - COME ON.

- HEY! - LET'S GO SAY HI.

- COME ON.

- FRED! FANCY BUMPING INTO YOU

IN A PLACE LIKE THIS.

THIS IS MY SISTER CHLOE.

- HI. - HI.

- THIS IS LOVELY RHIANNON. - RHIANNON.

WERE YOUR PARENTS LIKE FLEETWOOD MAC FANS?

- FLEETWOOD WHO?

- OH, THAT CHOLESTEROL BONANZA YOU'RE INHALING.

IT WOULDN'T HAPPEN TO BE A TURKEY BURGER, NOW, WOULD IT?

- IF IT IS, I GOT THE WRONG ORDER.

- YOU HAVE TO EXCUSE MY SISTER.

SHE'S A BIT OF A PURIST. - REALLY?

I'M A BUDDHIST. - OH!

- YOU KNOW, THIS BURGER IS TODAY'S SIMPLE PLEASURE.

- SIMPLE PLEASURE? - YEAH.

EVERY DAY, I INDULGE IN ONE REALLY SIMPLE,

EASY-TO-GET THING THAT MAKES ME FEEL GREAT.

GOT ANY SIMPLE PLEASURES, MISS SARAH SMILE?

- USED TO BE MY MORNING COFFEE.

- OH, LADY, YOU'RE KILLING ME.

- WELL, YOU KNOW, MY-- MY SISTER HAS TO GO.

THE KIDS-- THE KIDS ARE WAITING.

- NO, NOT REALLY. - YEAH, NO, YOU DO.

- YOU GUYS WANNA JOIN US FOR DESSERT?

THIS PLACE MAKES A MEAN DEATH BY CHOCOLATE CAKE.

- NO, NO. - THAT'S HOW I WANNA GO.

- YEAH, NO, YOU DON'T. IT'S 4,000 CALORIES.

BUT THANKS, FRED, REALLY,

AND IT'S WONDERFUL TO MEET YOU, RHIANNON.

- BYE!

- HEY. - HI!

- OKAY, SHAKESPEARE,

IT'S YOUR HOME FOR A FEW DAYS.

[both chuckling]

- HI. - THANKS A LOT.

I REALLY APPRECIATE IT.

- AH...OKAY. - THERE YOU GO.

I'M SO SORRY I HAVE TO MISS YOUR BIRTHDAY.

OKAY. OH, CAN I HAVE A KISS?

- YEAH! OH!

- ALL RIGHT. [laughing]

[silly voice] I LOVE YOU.

I'LL CALL YOU AS SOON AS I LAND.

- OKAY.

[Tabitha meows]

- UH...OH!

[Shakespeare barking] OH, SHAKESPEARE, HEEL!

[meow] OOH! WAIT!

[barking] TABITHA, RUN!

SHAKE, SHAKE, SHAKE, SHAKE, SHAKESPEARE!

OH...

[meow]

[growling]

[Shakespeare whimpers]

[continues whimpering]

SO I GUESS IT'S FREE.

- OH? IS TODAY YOUR BIRTHDAY?

- YOU WANT PROOF?

- NO. I TRUST YA.

WELL, HAPPY BIRTHDAY.

[cheerful notes]

- THANKS.

- SO WHAT ARE YOU AND SUPERMAN DOING TONIGHT?

YOU GONNA FLY AROUND METROPOLIS,

DOUBLE-DATE WITH JIMMY OLSEN AND LOIS LANE?

- UH, E-ERIK IS OUT OF TOWN.

WE CELEBRATED THE OTHER NIGHT.

- OH. BUMMER.

- YEAH, WELL...

THANK YOU.

FOR THE FREE SLING.

- SEE YA.

- [humming]

[telephone rings]

HELLO?

- HEY, BIRTHDAY GIRL. IT'S ME.

- ME WHO? - ME, FRED.

- COFFEE GUY FRED?

- WELL, WE IN THE TRADE PREFER THE TERM BARISTA.

- HOW DID YOU GET MY NUMBER?

- YOU'RE THE ONLY SARAH SMILE IN THE PHONE BOOK.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING? - WHAT'S UP, FRED?

- WELL, IF YOU'RE NOT TOO BUSY,

I WAS THINKING YOU MIGHT WANNA SWING BY THE CLUB

FOR A SPECIAL BIRTHDAY LATTE AND A DAY OLD MUFFIN HOEDOWN.

- WELL, THAT'S VERY NICE OF YOU,

BUT, UM, E-EXACTLY WHY?

- WHAT DO YOU MEAN WHY? IT'S YOUR BIRTHDAY, ISN'T IT?

- WELL, YES, BUT I--

- HEY, BUT NOTHIN'. WHAT DO YOU SAY?

- Y--I DON'T KNOW. I--[laughs]

[spoon clanks]

- ♪ WE

♪ WISH YOU A HAPPY BIRTHDAY

♪ WE WISH YOU A HAPPY BIRTHDAY ♪

♪ WE WISH YOU A HAPPY BIRTHDAY ♪

♪ AND WE'RE HAPPY YOU'RE HERE ♪

- [toot]

[cheering, whooping]

- EVERYBODY, THIS IS SARAH.

all: HI, SARAH!

- UH...HI.

- HARLEY!

- WOW.

- TAKE A DEEP BREATH, GAL.

I'M SURE YOU'VE GOT A WISH LIST A MILE LONG.

- BLOW IT OUT. - COME ON.

- OH, IT LOOKS GOOD. [chuckling]

- [whooping]

- [toot]

[country western music plays, harmonica plays]

♪

- ♪ BABY'S GOT ME RUNNIN'

♪ FROM MYSELF

♪ I GOT TO MAKE SOME REAL GOOD TIME ♪

♪ I GET ALONG JUST AS FAST AS I CAN ♪

♪ I KNOW I GOT TO LEAVE HER BEHIND ♪

♪ BUT I'LL BE COMIN' BACK WHEN I SEE THAT TRAMP ♪

♪ MIDNIGHT TRAIN KEEP RUNNIN' ♪

♪

- YOU KNOW, THAT WAS A REALLY SWEET THING YOU DID TONIGHT.

TO BE HONEST, I STILL CAN'T FIGURE OUT WHY.

- SOMETIMES A PARTY'S JUST A PARTY.

PLUS, IT'S GOOD TO BREAK THE DAILY GRIND.

- CAN I ASK YOU A PERSONAL QUESTION?

- SURE.

- WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO WITH THE REST OF YOUR LIFE?

- WHAT DO YOU MEAN? I'M DOING IT.

- YOU WANNA SERVE COFFEE FOREVER?

- I WANNA BE THE BEST BARISTA THERE IS.

- HOW DO YOUR PARENTS FEEL ABOUT THAT?

- [laughs] MY PARENTS?

MY PARENTS ARE A COUPLE OF AGING HIPPIES

OFF ON THEIR OWN PLANET, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

WE'RE NOT THAT CLOSE.

- OH. THAT'S TOO BAD.

- I THINK IT'S OKAY.

I MEAN, I'VE TURNED OUT ALL RIGHT,

IF I DO SAY SO MYSELF.

WHAT ABOUT YOU?

WHAT DID YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GREW UP?

- OH, I DEFINITELY WANT TO GET OUT OF HUMAN RESOURCES.

YOU KNOW, I THOUGHT MAYBE PUBLISHING

OR EDITING...

YOU KNOW, ACTUALLY, I-I WANTED TO GET INTO ILLUSTRATING.

I LIKE TO DRAW. - OH, YEAH?

GRAPHS AND CHARTS AND STUFF?

- NO. YOU KNOW, DRAW.

- YOU ANY GOOD?

- WELL, SEE FOR YOURSELF.

- WOW.

THESE ARE REALLY GOOD, VERY, UH...

VERY REALISTIC.

- YEAH, DON'T JUMP UP AND DOWN OR ANYTHING.

IT'S OKAY. - LOOK, I-I LIKE THINGS

A LITTLE MORE COCKEYED, BUT, UH, THEY'RE GREAT, REALLY.

YOU SHOULD SHOW THEM TO WHOEVER'S IN CHARGE,

AND MAYBE THEY'LL LET YA DOODLE A KID'S BOOK OR SOMETHING.

- REALLY? - YEAH, YEAH, WHY NOT?

IT'S FUNNY, I NEVER TOOK YOU FOR THE CREATIVE TYPE.

- WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY.

"YOU CAN'T JUDGE A BOOK BY ITS COVER."

- NO, YOU CAN'T, CAN YA?

SO WHEN'S SUPERMAN GET BACK?

- WOULD YOU STOP CALLING HIM THAT?

- OH, I'M SORRY. WHEN DOES MR. PERFECT GET BACK?

- IN A FEW DAYS. WHY?

- WELL, I WAS WONDERING IF YOU WANT TO CHILL OUT

WITH MR. BARISTA TOMORROW NIGHT,

MAYBE DO SOMETHING, UM...

MUSICAL?

- [chuckles] UM...

WELL...

YOU KNOW, WH-WHAT ABOUT RHIANNON?

- OH, NO, RHIANNON'S HISTORY.

SHE, UH...WENT TO VANCOUVER WITH HER YOGA TEACHER,

SWAMI, WHATEVER.

SO WHAT DO YOU SAY?

- YOU KNOW, FRED,

I-I'M GONNA HAVE TO SLEEP ON IT.

- ALL RIGHT.

BUT THIS OFFER TURNS INTO A PUMPKIN

TOMORROW AT NOON, SHARP. - GOT IT.

OKAY, FRED, WELL, THANK YOU SO MUCH

FOR THE PARTY, REALLY.

- YEAH. NOT A PROBLEM.

- BYE.

- GOOD NIGHT.

[engine turns]

- ONE NEW MESSAGE.

[beep] - HEY, BABY, IT'S ERIK.

I'M HERE WITH MY WHOLE FAMILY.

WE ALL WANNA WISH YOU A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.

ARE YOU READY?

voices: HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

[chuckling] - WISH YOU WERE HERE, SARAH.

CAN'T WAIT TO SEE YOUR SMILING FACE.

BYE, HONEY.

[click]

[beep]

TANYA...I THINK...

I THINK I'M GOING TO RECOMMEND YOU TO MR. PAXTON

FOR HIS NEW SECOND ASSISTANT.

I'M NOT SURE,

BUT I THINK THERE'S SOMETHING REALLY...SPECIAL

THAT I THINK HE'LL LIKE ABOUT YOU.

- SARAH, THAT'S AWESOME.

I TOTALLY APPRECIATE THE SHOT. YOU WILL NOT BE DISAPPOINTED.

- OH. BYE.

[line ringing]

[telephone ringing]

- L.A. CITY COFFEE.

- FRED.

HEY, IT'S, UH, ME, SARAH.

I WAS...JUST CALLING ABOUT TONIGHT.

- TOO LATE, CINDERELLA. IT'S PUMPKIN CITY.

- COME ON, WHAT'S, UH, SIX MINUTES BETWEEN...BUDDIES?

- ALL RIGHT. YOU WIN.

I'LL REV UP THE CHARIOT. THANK YOU.

- OKAY. - SEE YA.

- SO WE'RE GOING TO STINKY'S?

- THE SLINKY'S. - SLINKY'S.

- SLINKY'S. - OH...

♪

SO YOU REALLY LIKE THIS PLACE?

- WELL, I WOULDN'T WANT TO LIVE HERE, BUT YEAH.

IT'S A KICK.

WHAT YA DRINKING?

- I'LL HAVE A CHARDONNAY.

- TWO ZOMBIES, PLEASE.

- NO. I SAID I'LL HAVE A CHARDONNAY.

- YEAH, NO, I-I HEARD WHAT YOU SAID.

THAT'S WHY I ORDERED YOU A ZOMBIE.

[both chuckling]

- OH... - HERE YA GO.

AND AS MY GREAT GRANDDAD USED TO SAY...

MAY THE NEIGHBORS RESPECT YOU, TROUBLE NEGLECT YOU,

THE ANGELS PROTECT YOU, AND HEAVEN ACCEPT YOU.

SALUD.

[slurping]

[music in background]

- ME LIKE-Y THE ZOMBIE.

- HA. YOU WANT ANOTHER ONE?

- OH, NO. NO, NO.

I'M--I JUST HAVE ONE DRINK A DAY.

- WELL, IT'S ALMOST TOMORROW.

- OH, NO, NO, NO.

MAYBE I'LL JUST HAVE A HALF.

- OH, WAS THAT THE SOUND

OF SOMEONE'S ENVELOPE BEING PUSHED?

- HO HO HO HO HO.

[both laughing]

- SLINKY'S FAMOUS KARAOKE NIGHT WHERE YOU'RE THE STAR.

- OH, MY. WELL, GANG'S ALL HERE.

- COMPARED TO THOSE GUYS, I MUST LOOK LIKE A MOVIE STAR.

- YES, YOU DO!

YOU'RE CUTE, ACTUALLY. YOU ARE.

YOU KNOW, IF YOU DID SOMETHING WITH YOUR HAIR.

AND WORE A SHIRT.

- [laughing] YOU, SARAH SMILE, ARE DRUNK.

- NO. RELAXED, YES. DRUNK, NO.

- DOES THAT MEAN YOU'RE READY TO TAKE THE STAGE?

- NO. - NO?

- NO.

[off pitch] - ♪ WHEN THE NEW

♪ WORLD IS REVEALED

both: ♪ OH, WHEN THE NEW WORLD IS REVEALED ♪

♪ OH, HOW I WANT

♪ TO BE IN THAT NUMBER

♪ WHEN THE NEW WORLD IS REVEALED ♪

- YEAH! - WHOO!

- ♪ OH, WHEN THE SAINTS - ♪ SAINTS

both: ♪ GO MARCHING IN

[laughing] ♪ WHEN THE SAINTS

♪ GO MARCHING IN

♪ OH, I WANT TO BE IN THAT NUMBER ♪

♪ WHEN THE SAINTS GO MARCHING IN ♪

- ♪ BUM BUM BUM BUM BUM

WHOO! - ♪ GO MARCHIN' IN

- WHOO! - ♪ OH, WHEN THE SAINTS

both: ♪ GO MARCHING IN [both chuckling]

I THINK SOMEONE ACTUALLY HAD A GOOD TIME TONIGHT.

- I HAD A TOTALLY DECENT TIME.

- YESSSSS!

- OH! IS THAT A TATTOO? - IS IT?

- LET ME SEE. - HOW'D THAT GET THERE?

- OH. "RM."

[gasps] RHIANNON!

- HECK, NO. NO. - OH.

- RHONDA MCNAMARA. TENTH GRADE

I WAS...OVER THE MOON AND BEYOND PLUTO.

- SO WHAT HAPPENED TO, UH, RHONDA MCNAMARA?

- TWO WEEKS AFTER I GOT THE INK, SHE DUMPED ME.

- OH!

- AND I THOUGHT GETTIN' A TATTOO HURT.

- OH.

- HEY...WHO WANTS A CHILI CHEESEBURGER?

- NO. I DON'T EAT MEAT, FRED. - YEAH, YEAH, YEAH.

- I DON'T--NO.

- CHICKEN BACON BURGER TO GO?

- MM. THIS IS GOOD.

[snickering]

- I'M GONNA TELL YOU A LITTLE SECRET.

I DREAM ABOUT THESE SOMETIMES.

- I DON'T REMEMBER THE LAST TIME I HAD RED MEAT.

- COME ON, HOW MUCH BETTER IS THIS

THAN A BORING TURKEY BURGER? - IT'S NOT BETTER, IT'S JUST...

IT'S DIFFERENT.

- WELL, FOR MY MONEY, DIFFERENT IS GOOD.

- MM.

SOMETIMES IT IS.

[turns off engine]

- [laughing] - OH...

[laughing/whimpering]

- DON'T WORRY, YOU WERE-- YOU WERE A PERFECT GENTLEMAN.

- OH, GOOD. THAT'S--THAT'S GOOD TO KNOW.

HA. WELL, UM...

THANK YOU...FOR...

A MEMORABLE EVENING.

- BUDDIES?

- BUDDIES.

[beeping]

[line rings]

[telephone rings]

[ringing]

BAH!

[ringing]

[beep] HELLO?

- SARAH, CAN YOU HEAR ME?

- ERIK? YEAH--OOH! [static]

ERIK? OH, YEAH.

- HELLO! - HI.

I CAN'T HEAR YOU.

WHERE ARE YOU? IT'S NOISY.

- YEAH, IT'S A LONG STORY,

BUT I'M DRIVING THROUGH THE JUNGLE.

- THE JUNGLE? - THE HOSPITAL TRACKED ME DOWN

IN D.C.--NEXT THING YOU KNOW, I WAS FLYING OUT TO ECUADOR.

THERE WAS THIS BIG STORM,

LOT OF KIDS HURT WHEN A SCHOOL COLLAPSED OUT IN THE INTERIOR.

- OH, HOW HORRIBLE.

- YEAH. IF ALL GOES WELL, I SHOULD BE HOME

IN THREE, FOUR DAYS.

- O-OKAY. WELL...GOOD LUCK.

- HEY, BY THE WAY, WHERE WERE YOU LAST NIGHT?

I WAS REALLY WORRIED.

I LEFT A BUNCH OF MESSAGES ON YOUR CELL.

- UM...UM...

UH, Y-YEAH, LAST NIGHT?

I, UM...

I WAS TIRED FROM WORK.

I SHUT OFF THE PHONES AND I JUST--I WENT TO SLEEP.

- ALL RIGHT. WELL, AS LONG AS YOU'RE OKAY.

JUST--I'M NOT USED TO MISSING SOMEONE SO MUCH.

- I KNOW, ME TOO.

- SARAH--HEY, SARAH! [static]

- HEY--WHAT? - HELLO!

- I'M SORRY. YOU'RE BREAKING UP.

- HEY, SARAH, CAN YOU HEAR ME?

- ERIK?

[static]

[beep]

DON'T SAY ANYTHING.

[ding]

- OH. HA. MISS FISCHER.

WHAT CAN I DO FOR YOU TODAY?

- OH, I JUST NEED THESE, UH...PFFF...

YOU KNOW HOW TO DO IT.

- YES, I DO.

[knocking, door opens]

- SARAH, CAN I HAVE A WORD? - YEAH.

- THAT APPLICANT THAT YOU SENT OVER

FOR MY NEW SECOND ASSISTANT,

THE ONE WITH THE CRAZY HAIR, THE NOSE RING--

- YEAH, UH, SIR, UH,

I KNOW SHE DOESN'T LOOK AS TRADITIONAL

AS SOME OF THE OTHER ASSISTANTS, BUT I ASSURE YOU--

- NO, NO, NO, NO. THAT'S JUST IT.

Y-YOU USUALLY SEND ME THESE PERKY IVY LEAGUE TYPES.

THIS GIRL--SHE WAS A BREATH OF FRESH AIR.

SHE WAS UNIQUE, CREATIVE, THINKS OUT OF THE BOX.

- THAT'S TERRIFIC, MR. PAXTON.

I-I'M REALLY GLAD.

- WELL, LISTEN, YOU KNOW, FEEL FREE TO--

TO MIX IT UP A LITTLE BIT MORE AROUND HERE, SARAH.

ALL RIGHT? BOSS'S ORDERS.

- MR. PAXTON? UM...

I WAS WONDERING IF...

YOU COULD TAKE A LOOK AT SOME OF MY SKETCHES,

UM...MAYBE CONSIDER ME FOR ILLUSTRATING

ONE OF THE CHILDREN'S TITLES?

- SARAH, YOU ARE SO GOOD RUNNING HUMAN RESOURCES.

WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO WORK IN CREATIVE?

- B-BECAUSE I AM CREATIVE.

- [chuckles]

[exhales]

ALL RIGHT.

ALL RIGHT. [whispers] FINE.

- THANK YOU.

- HEY!

- WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR HAIR?

- NOTHIN'. HEY, TRY THIS.

- WHAT IS IT? - HOT OFF THE PRESSES.

I CALL IT THE BELLA COSTA.

COSTA RICAN BLEND, CHOCOLATE, STEAMED SOY MILK,

AND IT JUST CAME TO ME-- ALMOND SYRUP.

RICH, SMOOTH,

BUOYANT.

- I JUST GOT USED TO THE SUMATRAN SLING.

CAN'T YOU JUST MAKE ME THAT?

- NO, NO, NO, THAT-- THAT--THAT'S NOT YOU ANYMORE.

IF I MET YOU TODAY, I'D GIVE YOU THE BELLA COSTA.

MATCHES YOUR NEW VIBE. GO.

- I HAVE A NEW VIBE? - YOU HAVE A NEW VIBE.

- VERY TASTY. I LIKE IT.

- AM I GOOD, OR WHAT?

- YES. SPEAKING OF WHICH, YOU KNOW, I...

HAPPENED TO SEE THIS ONLINE, AND...

YOU SHOULD ENTER.

- [laughs] "WORLD BARISTA COMPETITION"?

THANKS. I KNOW I'M THE BEST. I DON'T NEED ANYONE TO TELL ME.

- GEE, YOU SHOULD ENTER

THE REGIONAL HUMILITY CHAMPIONSHIP.

YOU KNOW WHAT, WHY BOTHER?

WHO NEEDS 10,000 BUCKS IN PRIZE MONEY ANYWAY?

THANKS FOR THE COFFEE.

- WAIT--WHOA, WHOA.

WAIT A MINUTE.

UH...TEN Gs?

- WINNER TAKES ALL.

- HUH. YOU KNOW, MY GRAMMAR REALLY STINKS.

MAYBE YOU COULD HELP ME

WITH THE, UH, ESSAY.

[dance music throbs]

♪

[whooping, chattering]

- UH...[laughs]

ALL RIGHT, SO WHY DO THEY CALL IT A ZOMBIE?

- WELL, I GUESS AFTER YOU HAVE A FEW,

YOU KNOW, YOU FEEL LIKE A ZOMBIE.

[both laughing]

- HOW DID YOU FIND THIS PLACE ANYWAY?

- OH, A F-FRIEND TOOK ME HERE ONCE.

I JUST THOUGHT IT'D BE SOMETHING DIFFERENT.

- SARAH! DOC! FANCY SEEING YOU HERE.

- YEAH, E-ERIC, YOU REMEMBER FRED.

- YEAH, YEAH, OF COURSE. HEY, FRED.

HOW YOU LIVING, PAL? - I-- [laughing] I'M GOOD.

- AND THIS IS MY NEW FRIEND FROM THE DANCE FLOOR, LOLA.

- IT'S A PLEASURE.

- UH...SO WHO WANTS TO BOOGIE?

- AH...

- YEAH? - YES!

- LET'S DO IT! - YEAH.

- YEAH. YEAH, YEAH, YEAH.

- [chuckling]

OKAY. HA HA.

- ♪ CLOSER AND CLOSER TO YOU I FEEL ♪

♪ THE SUN LEAVES US WANTING MORE ♪

♪ NEARER AND NEARER OUR MOMENT COMES ♪

♪ IN THIS NIGHT

♪ UNDERNEATH THE STARS

♪ UNDERNEATH THE STARS

- I'M SORRY, I-- I CAN'T DANCE TO THIS.

I-I NEED A DIFFERENT BEAT.

- NO, NO, NO. JUST HAVE FUN WITH IT.

YOU KNOW, FUN.

- LIKE, UH...LIKE FRED?

♪

- I'LL BE RIGHT BACK. - UH, WELL--

- RIGHT BACK. - WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

WHERE--

♪

♪ LEAN ON THE SHOULDER OF SOMEONE GENTLE ♪

[music changes]

[beat picks up]

♪

♪ YOU'RE DANCIN', YOU'RE DANCIN' ♪

♪ YOU'RE DANCIN', YOU'RE DANCIN' ♪

♪

- WHOOP, WHOOP!

women: YEAH!

♪

[crowd shouting encouragement]

♪

- ♪ I'M DANCING TO THE BEAT

♪ I'M DANCING TO THE BEAT

♪ I'M DANCING TO THE BEAT

♪ I'M DANCING TO THE BEAT

♪ I'M DANCING TO THE BEAT

♪ I'M DANCING TO THE BEAT

♪ I'M DANCING TO THE BEAT

♪ I'M DANCING TO THE BEAT - OH!

♪

[cheers and applause]

♪ I'M DANCING TO THE BEAT

♪ I'M DANCING TO THE BEAT

♪ I'M DANCING TO THE BEAT

♪ I'M DANCING TO THE BEAT

♪ I'M DANCING TO THE BEAT

♪ I'M DANCING TO THE BEAT

[crowd cheering]

♪ D-A-N-C-I-N-G NOW

♪ D-A-N-C-I-N-G NOW

♪ D-A-N-C-I-N-G NOW

♪ D-A-N-C-I-N-G NOW

♪ TONIGHT, TONIGHT, TONIGHT, TONIGHT ♪

♪ TONIGHT, TONIGHT, TONIGHT, TONIGHT ♪

♪ I'M DANCING TO THE BEAT

♪ I'M DANCING TO THE BEAT

♪ I'M DANCING TO THE BEAT

♪ I'M DANCING TO THE BEAT

♪ I'M DANCING TO THE BEAT

♪ I'M DANCING TO THE BEAT

♪ I'M DANCING TO THE BEAT

♪ I'M DANCING TO THE BEAT

- AH!

[crowd applauds]

♪

[applause, shouting encouragement]

♪

[whooping, cheering]

- OH...

- IT'S DOWN HERE A LITTLE BIT.

- IT'S COLD. - I KNOW, BABY.

I'LL GIVE YOU MY COAT IN A SECOND.

ALL RIGHT.

OKAY.

YOU READY? - YEAH. I THINK SO.

WHOO.

WHAT IS-- THIS IS--

WHA--

[soft guitar plays]

♪

[clink]

[guitar music continues]

♪

- WELL, WHEN YOU SAID SURPRISE,

YOU WEREN'T KIDDING.

- WELL, THIS ISN'T THE SURPRISE.

- WHAT? W-THE--

WHAT IS?

- IT WAS MY GREAT-GRANDMOTHER'S.

MY MOM'S BEEN SAVING IT FOR ME.

TO GIVE TO MY WIFE.

- OH, ERIK, IT--IT'S--

IT'S SO BEAUTIFUL, I--

I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY.

- WELL...

SAY...YES.

[gasps]

- IMAGINE!

- OH, MY GOODNESS. - HIS GREAT-GRANDMOTHER'S.

IT'S A FAMILY HEIRLOOM. - WHAT DO YOU THINK?

SHOULD WE BOOK THE CLUB OR A HOTEL?

- FALL OR WINTER, I'D SAY THE CLUB.

SPRING OR SUMMER, THE PEAR TREE.

THEIR GARDEN ROOM, IT'S AMAZING.

- SARAH, HAVE YOU AND ERIK DISCUSSED DATES YET?

- UM...NO. NO, NOT--NOT YET.

- H-HONEY, WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?

THESE THINGS BOOK UP ONE, TWO, THREE.

- WELL, ACTUALLY, I, UM...

I...HAVEN'T SAID YES YET.

- W-WHY NOT?

- I JUST HAVEN'T, YOU KNOW--

I JUST HAVE TO THINK ABOUT IT.

- WHAT'S THERE TO THINK ABOUT? ERIK'S THE PERFECT MAN.

- YEAH, I DON'T THINK I'VE EVER SEEN

TWO MORE COMPATIBLE PEOPLE. - HE GETS MY VOTE.

- TAKE ALL THE TIME YOU NEED, SIS.

- THANKS, CHLOE.

- YEAH, THANKS, CHLOE.

- MOM, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

- CHECKING FOR AN EXPIRATION DATE.

- OKAY.

- IT'S NOT JUST ABOUT FINDING THE PERFECT MAN.

IT'S ABOUT FINDING THE PERFECT MAN FOR YOU.

JUST REMEMBER THE PROVERB.

"TRUST IN THE LORD WITH ALL YOUR HEART,

"AND LEAN NOT ON YOUR OWN UNDERSTANDING.

IN ALL WAYS ACKNOWLEDGE HIM, AND HE'LL DIRECT YOUR PATH."

- OH. - YOU'RE LATE.

- OH, AND YOU ARE WEARING THE HAWAIIAN STATE FLAG.

- WELL, AT LEAST IT'S GOT BUTTONS.

- TRUE. MM!

THIS IS NEW.

UH, SMOOTH, WOODSY, PUNGENT.

- VERY GOOD! YOU NOTICED.

I USED KONA BEANS INSTEAD. YOU KNOW, WHEN IN HAWAII...

- WISH I WOULD HAVE KNOWN IT WAS THEME DAY.

I WOULD HAVE WORN MY HULA SKIRT.

- [chuckles] SO SARAH, I BEEN THINKING...

- HEY. HEY.

- OH, HEY. WHAT--WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

- OH, I THOUGHT I'D TAKE MY RUN EARLY.

THOUGHT I MIGHT CATCH YOU HERE.

YOU RUNNING LATE?

- SEEMS TO BE THE CONSENSUS, YES.

- WHOA! ALOHA, FRED! [chuckling]

- HOW'S IT GOING, DOC? - SUPER-FANTASTIC.

SARAH TELL YOU I POPPED THE QUESTION?

I ASKED HER TO MARRY ME.

- YEAH, I WAS, UM... MEANING TO TELL YOU.

- WOW. WELL, UH...

WHAT DID SHE SAY WHEN YOU POPPED THE QUESTION?

- SHE'S STILL THINKING ABOUT IT,

BUT I FEEL OPTIMISTIC.

- WELL, I'M SURE SHE'LL MAKE THE RIGHT DECISION.

- ME TOO.

SO LISTEN, FRED, I'M GONNA NEED AN EXTRA JOLT TODAY.

WHAT DO YOU RECOMMEND? - UH...

YOU KNOW, I HAVE TO GO TO THE STOCK ROOM,

BUT HARLEY'LL HELP YOU.

HARLEY. - OH. YEAH.

[telephone rings]

- THIS IS SARAH.

- HEY, BABY, IT'S ME.

LISTEN, I JUST GOT CALLED AWAY ON EMERGENCY SURGERY IN CHICAGO.

I'LL BE BACK IN A FEW DAYS, OKAY?

- YEAH, IS THERE ANYTHING I CAN DO FOR YOU WHILE YOU'RE AWAY

BESIDES WATCH SHAKESPEARE?

- YEAH, ACTUALLY, THERE IS ONE THING.

- WH-WHAT IS IT?

- YOU CAN DECIDE IF YOU WANT TO MARRY ME.

- I WILL HAVE AN ANSWER FOR YOU AS SOON AS YOU COME HOME.

- I'LL BE COUNTING THE MINUTES.

LOVE YOU. [beep]

[tap tap]

- YES, MR. PAXTON. IS EVERYTHING OKAY?

- SIT, SIT. OH, EVERYTHING'S FINE.

CATHERINE IS WORKING OUT GREAT, PIERCED NOSE AND ALL.

ACTUALLY, I CAME BY TO TELL YOU

THAT I LOOKED AT YOUR SKETCHES.

VERY NICE WORK.

ACTUALLY, IT'S-- IT'S TOO NICE.

IT'S TOO...PRECISE FOR MY TASTES.

BUT, UH, LISTEN, YOU...

KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK HERE AT H.R.

OKAY.

- ♪ I NEED YOU NOW

♪ MORE THAN EVER I NEEDED YOU BEFORE ♪

♪ HOW DID WE LOSE EACH OTHER'S FOOTSTEPS IN THE SAND ♪

- HI.

- OH. HEY.

- YOU KNOW, ABOUT THIS MORNING,

I-I-I REALLY WANTED TO TELL YOU

A-ABOUT ERIK PROPOSING.

- THAT'S OKAY. YOU DON'T...

YOU DON'T OWE ME ANYTHING.

- I MEAN, IT'S JUST BEEN OVERWHELMING AND ALL,

YOU KNOW?

IT'S, UM...I JUST DIDN'T THINK YOU'D BE...

- SUPPORTIVE?

WHY WOULD YOU CARE WHAT I THINK?

- WELL, YOU WOULD CARE WHAT I-I THOUGHT

IF YOU WERE GETTING MARRIED, AND BESIDES,

I KNOW YOU DON'T LIKE ERIK VERY MUCH.

- I-I HARDLY KNOW THE GUY.

I MEAN, AS LONG AS YOU DIG HIM,

THAT'S ALL THAT MATTERS, RIGHT?

- SO WHEN'S-- WHEN'S THE BIG DAY?

- I DON'T KNOW, I--

I'M--I'M SORRY. - IT'S OKAY.

IT'S OKAY.

IT'S OKAY. I'LL GET IT. I'LL GET IT.

- ♪ SHOW ME

♪ OH, SHOW ME

♪ THE WAY-AY

- I GOTTA GO. - WH-WH-WH--

- I-I GOTTA GO. - WHERE YOU GOING?

HEY, SARAH.

- YOU KNOW WHAT? I'LL SEE YOU TOMORROW.

8:15, USUAL TIME, OKAY? - SARAH.

- ♪ I'M LISTENING

♪ I'M LISTENING

♪ HEAR THEM CALLING

♪ ANGELS CALLIN'

- WOW.

- ♪ LISTEN

♪ HEAR THEM CALLING

♪ LISTEN

[knocking on door]

- FRED, UM...

- WHAT HAPPENED BACK THERE?

- WHAT--WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

- YOU WERE ABOUT TO KISS ME.

- N-NO. I-I--

I DON'T KNOW, I--

- YOU DON'T KNOW?

WHAT, IS IT SO HARD TO IMAGINE

THAT YOU MIGHT ACTUALLY HAVE FEELINGS FOR A GUY LIKE ME?

- FRED, WHAT ARE YOU-- WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

JUST...

- YOU DROPPED THIS.

- IT'S A LIST I MADE.

IT WAS A LONG--LONG TIME AGO.

I-I'VE ADDED THINGS SINCE THEN.

- IT'S A LIST. IT'S A LIST.

WHAT KIND OF PERSON MAKES A LIST?

- SOMEONE WHO IS TIRED OF DATING THE WRONG MEN.

OKAY? SOMEONE WHO WANTS TO FIND SOMEONE SPECIAL

TO SPEND THE REST OF HER LIFE WITH.

AND, YES, I'M SORRY, I WAS BEING PROACTIVE,

AND, YES, I MADE A LIST.

SHOOT ME.

I'M TIRED OF JUST SITTING

AND WATCHING MY LIFE PASS ME BY.

- YOU KNOW WHAT I THINK?

I THINK YOU MADE THE LIST TO KEEP THE RIGHT GUYS AWAY,

TO NOT ATTRACT THEM, TO RAISE THE BAR SO HIGH

THAT IT'S IMPOSSIBLE FOR ANYONE TO MEASURE UP.

- ERIK MEASURES UP. - OH, AND I SEE YOU'RE JUST

JUMPING AT THE CHANCE TO MARRY HIM.

- I'M SORRY, FRED.

PEOPLE DON'T JUST JUMP INTO MARRIAGE.

IT'S ACTUALLY A BIG DECISION.

- YOU KNOW WHAT I THINK, SARAH?

I THINK YOU'RE JUST LIKE YOUR DRAWINGS--

ALL SAFE AND NEAT AND TIDY

AND TOTALLY UNWILLING

TO TAKE EVEN THE SLIGHTEST RISK.

- [sighs] CHLOE, I APPRECIATE YOUR HELP.

I REALLY DO.

BUT AFTER FRED'S LITTLE MELTDOWN,

I REALLY DON'T FEEL LIKE MAKING ANOTHER LIST.

- WELL, TOO BAD.

BEFORE YOU CAN EVEN THINK ABOUT MARRYING ERIK,

YOU GOTTA GET BARISTA BOY OUT OF YOUR SYSTEM.

- EXCUSE ME! BARISTA BOY WAS NEVER IN MY SYSTEM.

- TELL THAT TO SOMEBODY

YOU DIDN'T SHARE A BEDROOM WITH FOR 12 YEARS, 'KAY?

- OKAY, FINE, MAYBE FRED WAS IN MY SYSTEM

A TEENY, TINY, MINISCULE BIT, BUT NOT ENOUGH FOR THIS.

I MEAN, HOW CAN YOU EVEN COMPARE HIM TO ERIK?

- I CAN'T. YOU CAN.

- IM...PUL...SIVE.

YEAH, SEE? YOU KNOW WHAT?

YOU WERE RIGHT.

YOU WERE RIGHT. SAYS IT ALL RIGHT HERE.

I WILL NEVER FIND ANYONE AS GOOD FOR ME AS ERIK.

[Shakespeare barks]

- SHAKESPEARE! HELLO, BUDDY!

OH, YES, OH, YES!

[Sarah laughing]

- SHE SAID YES? - SHE SAID YES!

SHE SAID YES. SHE SAID YES!

both: ♪ SHE SAID YES, SHE SAID YES ♪

♪ SHE SAID YES

- ♪ MM MM

♪ OH OH

♪ OH, YOU SAID YOU DON'T PUT UP, YOUR HEART JUST ♪

♪ WON'T LEAVE

♪ YEAH, DID YOU KNOW, REMEMBER ♪

♪ OH, YEAH

♪ FINDING OUT THE COULDA BEEN ♪

♪ ISN'T JUST FOR FREE

♪ WELL, SUDDENLY IT'S IN FRONT OF ME ♪

♪ IT'S ALL I NEED TO SEE

♪ I CAN'T BELIEVE

♪ MY EYES

♪ OH OH LORD

♪ I CAN'T BELIEVE, I CAN'T BELIEVE ♪

♪ MY EYES

♪ WOMAN

♪ OH OH

♪ MM MM

♪ OOH

♪ YOU KNOW I'VE NEVER BEEN LIKE THIS, GIRL, BEFORE ♪

♪ AT LEAST NOT THAT I REMEMBER ♪

♪ NO NO

♪ FINDING OUT WHAT COULD HAVE BEEN ♪

- THANK YOU.

NONFAT HALF-CAF LATTE TO GO, PLEASE.

- WHAT ABOUT MY BELLA COSTA?

- THAT WAS THE NEW YOU.

THIS IS THE OLD YOU.

OR SHOULD I SAY THE OLD, OLD YOU.

- WHAT AM I, IN COFFEE JAIL?

- I JUST CALL IT LIKE I SEE IT.

- LOOK, FRED, I--

I'M SORRY IF MY LIST OFFENDED YOU.

- SO YOU AND THE E-MAN

DOING THE "FOR BETTER OR FOR WORSE" THING?

- YES, WE ARE.

- WELL, ISN'T THAT JUST SUPER-FANTASTIC?

HAVE YOU TOLD HIM ABOUT YOUR LITTLE LIST?

OH! YOU HAVEN'T TOLD THE DUDE, HAVE YOU?

- IT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS.

- WELL, IT IS HIS BUSINESS,

ESPECIALLY IF YOU'RE GONNA BE DR. AND MRS. PERFECT.

- YOU'RE JUST AS BITTER AS YOUR COFFEE, FRED.

HAVE A NICE LIFE.

- JUST CHECK-- CHECK THIS OUT.

JUST FOR THE HECK OF IT, I CALLED THE CALAMIGOS.

SEEMS THEY JUST HAD A WEDDING PARTY CANCEL.

BRIDE GOT COLD FEET OR SOMETHING.

SO NOW THE BANQUET ROOM,

YOU KNOW THE ONE WITH THE WRAPAROUND WINDOWS

THAT LOOK OVER THE BEACH?

WELL, IT'S NOW AVAILABLE FOR SATURDAY NIGHT,

FEBRUARY 1ST.

- HA!

FEB-FEB-FEBRUARY!

THIS--NEXT--

THIS FEBRUARY? - YEAH. EXACTLY.

- TWO MONTHS?

- WELL, WHAT ARE WE WAITING FOR?

SOONER THE BETTER, RIGHT? - YES, BUT...

WHAT ABOUT, UM... THE ENGAGEMENT PARTY

AND THE PEAR TREE?

- WELL, YOU SAID THE PEAR TREE WASN'T AVAILABLE

FOR THE WEDDING TILL NEXT SUMMER, RIGHT?

AND THERE'S CERTAINLY NO NEED TO HAVE AN ENGAGEMENT PARTY

IF THE BIG PARTY'S ONLY TWO MONTHS AWAY.

- YEAH, I SUPPOSE. I-I JUST--BUT--

- BUT WHAT? COME ON, SARAH, IT'S PERFECT.

LOOK, WE CAN GET MARRIED,

WE'LL SPEND TWO AMAZING WEEKS IN TAHITI

AND BE BACK IN TIME FOR YOUR FOLKS' ANNIVERSARY.

AS DR. AND MRS. ERIK CAVALLIERI.

- MM...HA...

- I JUST...

I CAN'T WAIT FOR US TO START OUR LIFE TOGETHER.

- SO SHOULD...

I CALL AND BOOK THE CALAMIGOS, OR SHOULD YOU?

- IT'S ALREADY DONE. [laughs]

SWEETIE, IT'S GONNA BE GREAT.

I JUST--I HOPE I DIDN'T MESS UP YOUR LIST.

- OH, YEAH, YOU DID. [weak laugh]

- ERIK...

THERE'S SOMETHING I SHOULD PROBABLY SHOW YOU...

BEFORE ANYTHING, THOUGH.

- WELL, Y-- - AH.

- I MEAN, Y-YOU HAVE TO-- YOU HAVE TO--

- NO, IT'S, UH...

NO, UH--AH. "MUST LOVE ANIMALS."

THAT'S GOOD, RIGHT, BUDDY?

"NO SLOGAN T-SHIRTS.

MUST HAVE NICE FEET."

BOY, YOU ARE, UH, THOROUGH.

- LOOK, YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE THAT EVER

EVEN CAME CLOSE TO BEING A PERFECT SCORE, YOU KNOW?

BUT THAT'S NOT THE REASON WHY I'M MARRYING YOU, OF COURSE.

- WHATEVER. NO, IT'S-- I'M DEEPLY FLATTERED.

AND IT'S DARN LUCKY I THREW AWAY

THAT "SURGEONS DO IT WITH HEART" T-SHIRT.

- SO YOU'RE NOT OFFENDED?

YOU--YOU--

- DON'T BE SILLY. - YOU SURE?

- IT'S ADORABLE. IT'S TOTALLY YOU.

IT'S TOTALLY WHY I LOVE YOU.

- REALLY?

- THERE ARE SO MANY DETAILS TO THINK ABOUT

WHEN IT COMES TO YOUR WEDDING.

I CAN ONLY SUGGEST.

THE MAJOR CHOICES ARE BETWEEN YOU TWO.

- WELL, ACTUALLY, ERIK AND I ARE--ARE--

ARE REALLY CLEAR ABOUT, YOU KNOW, WHAT WE WANT,

SO UM...

THANKS.

- [singsong] LEAVE IT TO SARAH.

CAN'T GO ANYWHERE WITHOUT HER LIST.

- THAT'S MY DAUGHTER.

THE MOST ORGANIZED GAL ON TWO FEET.

- WELL, ORGANIZED IS ONE THING,

AS LONG AS THE BRIDE AND GROOM ARE ON THE SAME PAGE.

OTHERWISE, IT'S JUST CHAOS.

- WELL, YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT US.

SARAH AND I AGREE ON JUST ABOUT EVERYTHING,

DON'T WE, SWEETIE? - UH-HUH.

- OKAY, SHALL WE START ON THE MENU?

- ALL RIGHT. FIRST OF ALL, NO RED MEAT,

AND NOTHING ENDANGERED-- WE'RE VERY ADAMANT ABOUT THAT.

- OKAY. THEN MIGHT I SUGG-- - SO WE'RE THINKING A CHOICE

OF EITHER WILD SALMON OR FREE-RANGE CHICKEN BREAST,

RIGHT, HONEY? - YOU KNOW, I-I DON'T KNOW.

I WAS THINKING THAT, UM, YOU KNOW, A LOT OF PEOPLE

DO LIKE RED MEAT, SO...

MAYBE WE CAN OFFER FILET MIGNON TOO.

- BABY, THAT'S--

THAT'S VERY DIFFERENT THAN WHAT WE TALKED ABOUT.

- I KNOW, BUT... DIFFERENT IS OKAY, RIGHT?

MAKE EVERYONE HAPPY.

- OKAY, YEAH. FILET MIGNON TOO.

BUT ONLY GRASS-FED ORGANIC.

TRY HEARST RANCH UP IN SAN SIMEON.

- WELL, WE USUALLY ORDER

FROM ORGANIC PASTURES IN RIVERSIDE.

- DO THEY GUARANTEE NO SUBTHERAPEUTIC ANTIBIOTICS

IN THE MEAT? - PFFT!

GOOD POINT!

WE'LL ORDER FROM HEARST.

- WHY DON'T WE GO ON TO CENTERPIECES?

UM, YOU KNOW WHAT, I-I SKETCHED OUT

JUST A FEW CONCEPTS.

- YOU DIDN'T MENTION THAT.

- YEAH, JUST SOME SIMPLE DRAWINGS I DID.

- OH, YEAH!

NO, SWEETIE, YOU'RE RIGHT.

THESE, UH... THEY'RE--THEY'RE SIMPLE.

I MEAN, I THOUGHT WE WERE GONNA GO FOR

SOMETHING MORE ELABORATE THAN THIS.

- YOU'RE RIGHT, OF COURSE. OF COURSE, YEAH.

- ERIK, MAYBE THESE ARE MORE TO YOUR LIKING.

PERSONALLY, I LOVE THIS THIRD ONE.

- OH...MY. - HUH?

- [chuckling]

- ARE THOSE--THOSE BIRD CAGES?

- YEAH! IT'S SO MUCH BETTER THAN A PLAIN OLD VASE.

PLUS, IT CAN HOLD THREE TIMES THE FLOWERS.

- BIRD CAGES. HOW UNIQUE.

- YEAH. ACTUALLY, I THOUGHT--

- DO THESE COME SILVER-PLATED? - SILVER, GOLD.

WHATEVER YOU LIKE.

AND WE CAN HAVE THEM BURSTING

WITH A MELANGE OF AUTUMN FLOWERS.

- SO LIKE SOME CALLA LILIES, DAHLIAS, AND DELPHINIUMS?

- AGAPANTHUS, BLUE IRISES.

[gasps] I KNOW--GRAPE HYACINTHS!

- YES! OH, AND ONE GIANT CYMBIDIUM ORCHID

SMACK IN THE MIDDLE, JUST TOWERING OVER ALL OF THEM.

- ERIK, THAT IS GENIUS!

- THAT'S MY FUTURE SON-IN-LAW.

[echoing] - ERIK, DARLING,

IS THERE ANYTHING YOU DON'T KNOW?

- SARAH, YOU HAVE QUITE A CATCH HERE.

YOU TWO ARE GONNA BE SO HAPPY.

[voice distorting, echoing] I JUST SAID

I THINK YOU TWO ARE GONNA BE SO HAPPY.

- SARAH...YOU ALL RIGHT?

- I'M OKAY. - HONEY, WHAT IS IT?

- OH-- - WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA!

- OH! OH!

- [breathing heavily]

I JUST... I CAN'T BREATHE.

- I'M TAKING HER TO THE HOSPITAL.

[echoing] - OH...

- HOW'S MY GIRL, PETE?

- WELL, HER VITAL SIGNS ARE FINE,

AND ALL HER TESTS CAME BACK NEGATIVE.

I'D SAY WHAT YOU EXPERIENCED WAS...

SIMPLY A REACTION TO STRESS.

- STRESS? I-I COULDN'T BREATHE.

- NO, SWEETIE, HYPERVENTILATION'S

OFTEN A RESULT OF STRESS.

- SARAH, ARE YOU PARTICULARLY ANXIOUS ABOUT ANYTHING

RIGHT NOW? - NO, WE WERE JUST SITTING

WITH OUR WEDDING PLANNER, TALKING ABOUT FOOD AND FLOWERS.

ALL OF A SUDDEN, SHE COULDN'T BREATHE.

- JOANIE HAD SUCH COMMITMENT ANXIETY,

SHE'D THROW UP IF SHE EVEN LOOKED AT A WEDDING DRESS.

- I DON'T HAVE COMMITMENT ANXIETY.

TELL HIM I-I DON'T HAVE COMMITMENT ANXIETY.

- WELL, LET'S JUST BE GLAD IF THAT'S ALL IT WAS.

RIGHT, ERIK? - ABSOLUTELY.

THANKS FOR THE SECOND OPINION, PAL.

- CAN'T BE TOO SURE ABOUT THESE THINGS, RIGHT?

- IT'S A BIG DECISION, FRED.

IT'S NOT JUST, YOU KNOW, GO GET MARRIED.

IT'S ACTUALLY A BIG DECISION.

- YOU KNOW WHAT I THINK, SARAH?

I THINK YOU'RE JUST LIKE YOUR DRAWINGS--

ALL SAFE AND NEAT AND TIDY

AND TOTALLY UNWILLING TO TAKE EVEN THE SLIGHTEST RISK.

- "FRED JONES, NUMBER TEN."

[gasps]

OH... [keys clacking]

PRINT.

- [playing harmonica]

- THANKS FOR TELLING ME

YOU'RE IN THE BARISTA CONTEST!

- HO HO HO. PARDON "EZ MOI."

I WAS TOO BUSY "HAVING A NICE LIFE,"

WHICH IN MY BOOK MEANS YOU WANTED ME TO GET LOST.

- WELL, IN MY BOOK, IT DOESN'T MEAN THAT.

I GUESS WE GO BY DIFFERENT BOOKS.

- I GUESS SO.

- SO I JUST WANTED TO WISH YOU GOOD LUCK.

SO...GOOD LUCK.

OKAY, I HAD A PANIC ATTACK.

SO MAYBE YOU WERE RIGHT.

I, UM...WAS--

I-I WAS...

MAYBE A LITTLE BIT COMMITMENT-PHOBIC.

SO I JUST WANTED TO TELL YOU THAT.

SO...HOW'S PRACTICE GOING?

- FOR WHAT? - THE CONTEST.

- I'M NOT--I'M NOT DOING THE CONTEST.

- WHY NOT?

FRED, IT'S--

FRED, THIS IS SILLY.

YOU'RE SO GOOD AT THIS. YOU MAKE PEOPLE HAPPY.

AND THAT MAKES YOU HAPPY, SO...

AND IT'S $10,000, SO...

YOU SHOULD DO IT.

- I'LL THINK ABOUT IT.

[paper rustling]

[numbers beeping]

[line ringing]

- OH, MR. PAXTON.

UM...

SORRY. HI.

UM, I HAVE SOME NEW SKETCHES I WANTED TO SHOW YOU.

- SARAH, REALLY, I DON'T THINK THAT--

- PLEASE?

- YOU DID THESE?

I'LL GET BACK TO YOU.

- GREAT.

- GO, FRED, GO, FRED,

GO, FRED, GO, FRED-- - WOULD YOU STOP THAT?

YOU'RE RUINING MY CONCENTRATION.

- SORRY, BRO.

- YES, HERE WE GO. 12 PERFECT ESPRESSOS.

[both laughing]

- HOW WE DOING? HOW WE DOING?

- 9:17.

- HOW WE DOING?

- 6:01! [machine whirring]

- TIME.

- 6:17.

- FEELS NICE. LET'S GET IT RIGHT ON IT.

- SHAKESPEARE, LET ME SEE.

- THAT'S PERFECT. THAT'S PERFECT.

TRY THAT. TRY THAT.

- ♪ THESE ARE THE TIMES

♪ THAT YOU'LL NEVER FORGET

- EACH LETTER IS BETTER THAN THE LETTER

THAT CAME BEFORE THE OTHER LETTER.

♪ I'M FEELIN' GOOD, FEELING GREAT, FEELING GREAT ♪

♪ THESE ARE THE TIMES

♪ THAT YOU'LL NEVER FORGET

♪ I'M FEELING GOOD, FEELING GREAT, FEELING GREAT ♪

♪ I'M FEELING GOOD, FEELING GREAT, FEELING GREAT ♪

♪ THESE ARE THE TIMES

♪ THAT YOU'LL NEVER FORGET

♪ I'M FEELING GOOD, FEELING GREAT, FEELING GREAT ♪

♪ I'M FEELING GOOD, FEELING GREAT, FEELING GREAT ♪

♪ THESE ARE THE TIMES - NOW, REMEMBER.

WIN OR LOSE...

YOU'LL ALWAYS BE THE BEST BARISTA IN THE WEST...TO ME.

- YOU SURE WE DON'T NEED AN INVITATION FOR THIS WEDDING?

- YEAH, YEAH, I MEAN,

HOTELS LET THEIR CLIENTS DO THIS ALL THE TIME.

LET THEM SIT IN AND GET SOME GOOD IDEAS, YOU KNOW?

SPEND SOME MORE MONEY.

- WELCOME TO THE WEST COAST REGIONAL

INVITATIONAL BARISTA CHAMPIONSHIP!

[cheers and applause]

WELL, LET'S GET STARTED.

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, LET'S MEET OUR FINALISTS!

OUR FIRST FINALIST UP FROM BAKERSFIELD, CALIFORNIA,

BARISTA NUMBER FOUR, MEREDITH SANCHEZ!

[cheers and applause]

AND NEXT, ON OUR LIST RIGHT HERE,

FROM L.A. CITY COFFEE, A HOMETOWN BOY FROM LOS ANGELES,

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, BARISTA NUMBER TEN,

FRED JONES!

[cheers and applause]

NEXT ON OUR LIST, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,

FROM LOS OSOS, CALIFORNIA,

NUMBER NINE, CURTIS CHIN!

GOOD LUCK TO THE COMPETITORS.

AND LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, LET'S GET STARTED!

[organ begins The Wedding March]

♪

TIME! [ding]

FOR BARISTA NUMBER FOUR, MEREDITH SANCHEZ,

11 MINUTES, 3 SECONDS!

[cheers and applause]

[The Wedding March continues]

♪

- KENNETH AND MARCY HAVE WRITTEN THEIR OWN VOWS

WHICH THEY WILL NOW SHARE WITH YOU.

- MARCY, I PROMISE TO LOVE,

HONOR, AND OBEY YOU...

AND TO, UH...

RESPECT AND CHERISH

THE MANY DIFFERENCES BETWEEN US.

MAY OUR ASSETS AND OUR SHORTCOMINGS...

[chuckles] HELP US GROW AS HUSBAND AND WIFE

FOR MANY, MANY YEARS TO COME.

[phone beeping]

- [whispering] YEAH, IT'S THE HOSPITAL.

I GOTTA GO. SORRY, HONEY. TAKE NOTES.

- LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,

TIME NOW FOR THE ALL-IMPORTANT TASTING.

- KENNETH,

I CAN SAY IT NOW.

YOU...WERE NOT THE MAN I EXPECTED TO MARRY.

BUT...

I AM SO GRATEFUL FOR THE PARTNER I FOUND IN YOU.

WHEN I'M SAD, YOU MAKE ME HAPPY.

WHEN I'M WEAK, YOU MAKE ME STRONG.

YOU ARE TRULY HEAD AND SHOULDERS

ABOVE ANY MAN I'VE EVER KNOWN,

AND I LOVE YOU FOR IT.

- LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, TIME NOW...

FOR OUR FINAL CONTESTANT, BARISTA NUMBER TEN,

FRED JONES!

- I NOW PRONOUNCE YOU HUSBAND AND WIFE.

YOU MAY KISS THE BRIDE.

guests: OH! [applause]

[The Wedding Marchresumes]

[applause]

- CONGRATULATIONS!

- CONGRATULATIONS!

[ding]

[cheers and applause]

- FOR BARISTA NUMBER TEN,

FRED JONES IS 10 MINUTES, 51 SECONDS!

AND NOW, TIME FOR THE TASTING.

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,

IT APPEARS THAT AFTER TASTE AND TESTING,

MEREDITH, FRED, AND CURTIS,

IT APPEARS AS THOUGH YOU'RE IN A DEAD HEAT

GOING INTO THE FINAL ROUND.

[cheers and applause]

LET'S GIVE THEM A NICE ROUND OF APPLAUSE.

[beep beep beep]

- HEY, SARAH, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

- UH, HOW'D EVERYTHING GO? HOW'S YOUR PATIENT?

- OH, EXCELLENT.

HE CAME THROUGH LIKE A LITTLE CHAMP.

- THAT'S GREAT WORK, ERIK.

I'LL CATCH YOU LATER.

- BABY, WHAT IS IT?

EVERYTHING OKAY?

- LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,

TIME NOW FOR THE SPECIALTY DRINK ROUND!

BARISTAS, ARE YOU READY?

ON YOUR MARKS...

GET SET...

MS. EVANS.

[ding]

- I'M SORRY. I'M SORRY.

I JUST--THIS IS THE HARDEST THING I'VE EVER HAD TO DO.

IT'S JUST I WAS AT THAT WEDDING,

AND I WAS WATCHING THEM AND I WAS LISTENING TO THEM,

AND I JUST DON'T... FEEL THE SAME.

AND I SHOULD FEEL THAT WAY.

BUT I DON'T.

- YEAH, YOU SHOULD.

DID YOU EVER FEEL THAT WAY ABOUT ME?

- YES.

I THINK.

I DON'T KNOW, I...

I JUST--I FEEL I NEED SOMETHING...

DIFFERENT.

I NEED SOMETHING MORE.

- DIFFERENT FROM WHAT'S ON YOUR LIST?

- YOU SAID IT YOURSELF.

YOU CAN'T CREATE YOUR OWN DESTINY.

- [scoffing]

YOU KNOW, I NEVER WANTED TO MENTION IT, BUT...

I ALWAYS THOUGHT THERE WAS SOMETHING MISSING

FROM THAT LIST OF YOURS.

A LIST THAT I SUPPOSEDLY FULFILLED.

- WHAT?

- THERE WAS NOTHING ON THERE ABOUT LOVE.

- I'M...I'M REALLY SORRY, ERIK.

YOU REALLY ARE A WONDERFUL MAN.

- I'M GONNA MISS YOU, SARAH.

- I'LL MISS YOU.

[cheers and applause]

[machines hissing]

- OKAY. OKAY.

OKAY.

[applause]

- JUDGES, CAN I GET YOUR FINAL TALLIES, PLEASE?

THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

I AM PROUD TO ANNOUNCE THE FIRST,

SECOND, AND THIRD-PLACE WINNERS

IN THIS YEAR'S WEST COAST REGIONAL INVITATIONAL

BARISTA CHAMPIONSHIP.

BARISTAS, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,

IT'S TIME.

THIRD PLACE, WITH AN ESPRESSO RACE TIME

OF 11 MINUTES, 18 SECONDS

AND A SPECIALTY DRINK SCORE OF 9.4 OUT OF A POSSIBLE 10,

CURTIS CHIN!

SECOND PLACE...

WITH AN ESPRESSO RACE TIME

OF 11 MINUTES, 3 SECONDS

AND A SPECIALTY DRINK SCORE OF 9.6,

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, MISS MEREDITH SANCHEZ!

THAT, OF COURSE, MAKES OUR FIRST-PLACE WINNER

WITH AN ESPRESSO RACE TIME

OF AN UNHEARD OF 10 MINUTES, 51 SECONDS,

AND A SPECIALTY DRINK SCORE OF A PERFECT 10.0,

MR. FRED JONES!

- THANK YOU. THANK YOU.

THANK YOU. - WHOO!

- THANK YOU.

THANK YOU.

- CONGRATULATIONS. - THANKS VERY MUCH.

- NOW, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,

ON BEHALF OF THE WEST COAST

REGIONAL INVITATIONAL BARISTA COMPETITION AND CHAMPIONSHIP,

WE HAVE THIS FIRST-PLACE CHECK IN THE AMOUNT OF $10,000!

- WOW!

- FRED, BECAUSE OF THIS, YOU HAVE QUALIFIED

TO COMPETE IN THE WORLD BARISTA CHAMPIONSHIP NEXT SPRING

IN HONOLULU, HAWAII!

- WELL, UM... THANK YOU.

THANK YOU, UH...

THANK YOU TO THE WEST COAST REGIONAL INVITATIONAL

BARISTA CHAMPIONSHIP FOR THIS INCREDIBLE HONOR

AND FOR THIS HUGE WAD OF CASH.

I, UH, I PROMISE NOT TO SPEND IT WISELY.

[laughter]

I ALSO, UH, WANNA THANK

SOMEONE WHO NOT ONLY PUSHED ME TO ENTER THIS COMPETITION

BUT SOMEONE WHO IS ALSO THE INSPIRATION

BEHIND ONE OF MY WINNING SPECIALTY DRINKS.

YOU SEE, WHEN WE FIRST MET,

I TOOK ONE LOOK AT HER AND I THOUGHT,

I DON'T HAVE A CHANCE IN THE WORLD WITH THIS WOMAN,

BUT I SURE KNOW WHAT KINDA COFFEE SHE NEEDS.

AND SO THE SUMATRAN SLING

AND A SPECIAL FRIENDSHIP WAS BORN...

AND I JUST WANNA SAY

THAT I'VE REALLY MISSED THAT FRIENDSHIP.

SO SARAH FISCHER, TAKE YOURSELF A BOW.

- IT'S SO EXCITING. - CONGRATULATIONS.

- SEE YA.

- WOW! - HA HA HA HA.

- LOOK AT YOU.

WELL...

YOU SHOULD CONGRATULATE ME.

- WAIT. AREN'T YOU SUPPOSED TO CONGRATULATE ME?

- I-I CALLED OFF MY WEDDING.

- NO WAY.

- YES WAY.

- WELL, UH... WHAT HAPPENED?

DR. PERFECT WASN'T SO PERFECT AFTER ALL?

- NO, ACTUALLY, UM... HE'S PRETTY PERFECT.

I JUST REALIZED THAT, UH, WHAT I WANTED WAS,

UM...SOMEONE...

IMPERFECT.

- IS THAT SO?

- SO I WAS WONDERING IF, UH...

YOU KNEW ANYONE IMPERFECT

THAT YOU COULD INTRODUCE ME TO.

- MM. WELL, WHAT ABOUT YOUR LIST?

- IT'S ON THE LIST. IT'S JUST--IT'S...

A LOT SHORTER.

YOU WANNA HEAR IT? - I DON'T KNOW, DO I?

- IT SAYS... MUST LOVE THE GUY MORE THAN...

ANYTHING IN THE WORLD.

- THAT'S IT? - THAT'S IT.

- WHAT ABOUT THE GUY LOVING YOU

MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE IN THE WORLD TOO?

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