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1
00:00:02,168 --> 00:00:02,628
- ALL RIGHT.
2
00:00:02,636 --> 00:00:03,636
NOW THAT YOU'VE REMOVED
THE PANEL,
3
00:00:03,637 --> 00:00:06,167
YOU SHOULD BE ABLE TO SEE
SIX WIRES, CORRECT?
4
00:00:06,173 --> 00:00:06,713
- CORRECT.
5
00:00:06,707 --> 00:00:08,137
- OKAY, GOOD.
NOW, STAY CALM.
6
00:00:08,142 --> 00:00:10,242
HOW MUCH TIME IS LEFT
ON THE CLOCK?
7
00:00:10,244 --> 00:00:12,244
- 4:20.
8
00:00:12,246 --> 00:00:14,176
- NICE!
9
00:00:14,181 --> 00:00:14,951
- HELLO?
10
00:00:14,949 --> 00:00:16,979
HELLO?
HELLO?
11
00:00:21,888 --> 00:00:24,358
- UGH, I'M BORED.
12
00:00:24,358 --> 00:00:25,788
I, LIKE, REALLY WANT TO
PLAY THAT VIDEO GAME
13
00:00:25,793 --> 00:00:27,493
WE USED TO PLAY.
14
00:00:27,495 --> 00:00:29,055
WHAT WAS THAT CALLED?
DO YOU REMEMBER?
15
00:00:29,063 --> 00:00:32,403
- I DON'T KNOW.
YOU WOULD NEVER LET ME PLAY.
16
00:00:32,400 --> 00:00:33,700
- THERE WAS ONLY ONE CONTROLLER.
17
00:00:33,701 --> 00:00:35,271
WHAT WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO,
NOT PLAY?
18
00:00:35,269 --> 00:00:36,139
ARE YOU CALLING MY FAMILY POOR
19
00:00:36,137 --> 00:00:37,667
'CAUSE WE COULD ONLY AFFORD
ONE CONTROLLER?
20
00:00:37,671 --> 00:00:39,511
YOU'RE, LIKE,
THE WORST FRIEND EVER.
21
00:00:39,507 --> 00:00:40,307
I CAN'T EVEN BELIEVE YOU.
22
00:00:40,307 --> 00:00:41,237
LET'S GO ASK THE DORK
AT THE GAMEHOLE.
23
00:00:41,242 --> 00:00:45,112
HEY, DORK, WHAT WAS THAT GAME
I USED TO LOVE WHEN I WAS KID?
24
00:00:45,112 --> 00:00:47,012
- WELL, CAN YOU, LIKE,
DESCRIBE IT?
25
00:00:47,014 --> 00:00:47,614
- YEAH.
26
00:00:47,615 --> 00:00:49,745
THERE WAS A GUY,
AND HE DID, LIKE, SOME JERPS.
27
00:00:49,750 --> 00:00:53,890
I THINK IT WAS ON
THE NINTENGENDER BOX 3000.
28
00:00:53,888 --> 00:00:54,688
- UM...
29
00:00:54,688 --> 00:00:55,988
- OH, MY GOD, WHAT IS THAT?
30
00:00:55,990 --> 00:00:57,690
- THAT IS THE VIRTUS EDGE.
31
00:00:57,691 --> 00:00:59,691
IT'S LIKE THIS SUPER-FUTURISTIC
PROTOTYPE.
32
00:00:59,693 --> 00:01:00,793
- OH, MY GOD,
PUT IT ON MY BODY.
33
00:01:00,795 --> 00:01:02,625
- PLEASE DON'T TOUCH.
- CAN I TRY IT?
34
00:01:02,630 --> 00:01:05,130
- CAN'T YOU SEE THERE'S
ONLY ONE, JENNIFER?
35
00:01:05,132 --> 00:01:06,232
GOD, YOU ALWAYS DO THIS.
36
00:01:06,233 --> 00:01:07,603
YOU'RE SO SELFISH.
37
00:01:07,601 --> 00:01:09,901
NOW, HELP ME PUT IT ON MY BODY.
38
00:01:09,904 --> 00:01:10,844
[groaning]
39
00:01:10,838 --> 00:01:14,038
JENNIFER, COME ON!
40
00:01:14,041 --> 00:01:15,771
[beeping]
41
00:01:15,776 --> 00:01:16,936
OH, MY GOD.
42
00:01:16,944 --> 00:01:19,384
THIS IS, LIKE, EFFING AWESOME.
43
00:01:19,380 --> 00:01:21,610
LOOK, THERE'S, LIKE, A GUY
44
00:01:21,615 --> 00:01:24,015
AND, LIKE, A LASER TIGER
45
00:01:24,018 --> 00:01:25,048
AND A MOUNTAIN.
46
00:01:25,052 --> 00:01:25,752
OH, IT'S SO BIG.
47
00:01:25,753 --> 00:01:30,363
THE MAGICAL WONDERS
ARE BLOWING MY MIND.
48
00:01:30,357 --> 00:01:32,827
I JUST TURNED A FIREMAN
INTO CANDY.
49
00:01:32,827 --> 00:01:34,357
OH, LET ME EAT YOU.
50
00:01:34,361 --> 00:01:35,691
- I WANT TO SEE
THE MAGICAL WORLD.
51
00:01:35,696 --> 00:01:39,466
- I HEAR A BITCH.
IT SOUNDS SO REALISTIC,
52
00:01:39,467 --> 00:01:42,897
LIKE AS IF SHE'S
RIGHT NEXT TO ME.
53
00:01:42,903 --> 00:01:45,643
OH, LOOK, A MAGICAL CAVE.
54
00:01:45,639 --> 00:01:46,869
I WONDER WHAT'S IN HERE.
55
00:01:46,874 --> 00:01:50,114
OH, MY GOD, A GHOST!
56
00:01:50,111 --> 00:01:51,811
[shrieks]
57
00:01:51,812 --> 00:01:52,142
OOF!
58
00:01:52,146 --> 00:01:54,906
[loud crash]
59
00:01:54,915 --> 00:01:58,545
[electricity crackling]
60
00:02:01,287 --> 00:02:01,847
[groaning]
61
00:02:01,856 --> 00:02:02,916
- OH, MY GOD, BETH.
62
00:02:02,923 --> 00:02:04,963
YOU'RE LIKE A NINJA TURTLE.
63
00:02:04,959 --> 00:02:06,789
- EW, GROSS.
WAIT!
64
00:02:06,794 --> 00:02:07,964
WHY THE HELL ARE YOU
THE PRINCESS?
65
00:02:07,962 --> 00:02:09,762
THAT'S EFFIN' CRAP!
66
00:02:09,763 --> 00:02:11,003
- YOU KNOW WHAT'S CRAP?
67
00:02:10,998 --> 00:02:12,798
THAT YOU NEVER LET ME PLAY.
68
00:02:12,800 --> 00:02:15,400
MAYBE YOU'RE THE SELFISH ONE,
BETH.
69
00:02:15,402 --> 00:02:19,142
- I'LL EFFIN' KILL YOU, BITCH!
70
00:02:22,108 --> 00:02:24,608
[both grunting]
71
00:02:29,949 --> 00:02:33,419
[boom]
72
00:02:33,420 --> 00:02:35,450
- [groans]
73
00:02:36,322 --> 00:02:37,862
BATTLETURDS!
74
00:02:37,858 --> 00:02:40,928
THIS IS TOTALLY THE GAME.
75
00:02:40,928 --> 00:02:41,858
- IS IT TWO-PLAYER?
76
00:02:41,862 --> 00:02:45,162
- GAME OVER, BITCH.
77
00:02:46,900 --> 00:02:47,730
[telephone rings]
78
00:02:47,735 --> 00:02:49,025
- HELLO, TRIPTANK.
- YEAH, MAN.
79
00:02:49,036 --> 00:02:50,696
MY NAME IS NOT IMPORTANT.
80
00:02:50,704 --> 00:02:52,674
LIKE, LITERALLY,
THAT'S MY NAME.
81
00:02:52,673 --> 00:02:53,843
I'M HIGH AS
A [bleep] RIGHT NOW.
82
00:02:53,841 --> 00:02:57,411
I ACCIDENTALLY SMOKED MY TV.
83
00:02:57,411 --> 00:02:58,711
WHILE I WAS WATCHIN' THAT SCENE
84
00:02:58,712 --> 00:02:59,782
BECAUSE THAT POT
LOOKED DELICIOUS
85
00:02:59,780 --> 00:03:02,450
AS A [bleep] IN THERE.
86
00:03:02,449 --> 00:03:03,379
- DID YOU SMOKE THE REMOTE?
87
00:03:03,384 --> 00:03:06,594
- I'M NOT CALLIN' TO GET
REIMBURSEMENT FOR MY TV.
88
00:03:06,587 --> 00:03:07,387
I'M JUST CALLIN' TO TELL YOU
89
00:03:07,388 --> 00:03:10,688
HOW MUCH I ENJOY
THAT SORT OF THING, MAN.
90
00:03:11,691 --> 00:03:13,991
- DID YOU SMOKE THE CABLE BOX,
TOO?
91
00:03:13,994 --> 00:03:15,164
- WHY IS IT SO DIFFICULT?
92
00:03:15,162 --> 00:03:15,832
[both grunting]
93
00:03:15,829 --> 00:03:16,899
- WOULD YOU JUST
SHOVE IT IN?
94
00:03:16,897 --> 00:03:18,927
- OH, OKAY,
SHOVE IT IN, DEBBIE.
95
00:03:18,933 --> 00:03:20,803
WHO DOES THAT?
96
00:03:20,801 --> 00:03:21,671
THIS IS HOW I ALWAYS DO IT.
97
00:03:21,669 --> 00:03:23,939
I FIDDLE AROUND WITH IT
UNTIL IT FINDS ITS OWN WAY IN.
98
00:03:23,938 --> 00:03:25,568
IT'S VERY NATURAL.
99
00:03:25,573 --> 00:03:27,343
- OH, MY GOD,
HAS THAT EVER WORKED?
100
00:03:27,341 --> 00:03:29,011
I CAN'T EVEN TELL
IF YOU'RE IN YET.
101
00:03:29,009 --> 00:03:29,809
HERE, JUST LET ME GRAB IT.
102
00:03:29,810 --> 00:03:32,240
- UGH, YOU'RE STARTING TO
SOUND LIKE YOUR MOTHER.
103
00:03:32,246 --> 00:03:33,176
LET ME TAKE CARE OF THIS.
104
00:03:33,180 --> 00:03:35,710
- HONEY, I CAN ALWAYS JUST GET
A NEW ONE TO PUT IN THERE.
105
00:03:35,716 --> 00:03:36,916
- HELL, NO!
NO, I CAN DO THIS.
106
00:03:36,917 --> 00:03:38,917
UGH, COME ON.
COME ON.
107
00:03:38,919 --> 00:03:40,789
YES!
IT'S IN.
108
00:03:40,788 --> 00:03:41,648
YOU READY TO SCREW?
109
00:03:41,655 --> 00:03:44,315
- FINE.
LET'S JUST GET THIS OVER WITH.
110
00:03:44,325 --> 00:03:48,725
[both grunting]
111
00:03:48,729 --> 00:03:51,499
- THERE!
LIGHT BULB IS NOW SCREWED IN.
112
00:03:51,498 --> 00:03:52,358
TA-DA!
113
00:03:52,366 --> 00:03:53,266
BIG REVEAL.
114
00:03:53,267 --> 00:03:53,997
- TOOK LONG ENOUGH.
115
00:03:54,001 --> 00:03:55,331
I COULD'VE FINISHED IT
FASTER MYSELF.
116
00:03:55,336 --> 00:03:58,066
- NEXT TIME WHEN I'M LAZY
AND JUST WANT TO WATCH CARTOONS,
117
00:03:58,072 --> 00:03:58,872
I'LL LEAVE IT UP TO YOU.
118
00:03:58,872 --> 00:04:01,072
WELL, THAT'S ENOUGH SCREWING
FOR ONE NIGHT.
119
00:04:01,075 --> 00:04:02,135
- OH, MAN!
120
00:04:02,142 --> 00:04:05,082
I WAS REALLY HOPIN'
TO JERK OFF TO THAT.
121
00:04:05,079 --> 00:04:06,139
- FINISHED!
122
00:04:06,146 --> 00:04:07,746
[gulping]
123
00:04:07,748 --> 00:04:09,478
U.S.A.!
U.S.A.!
124
00:04:09,483 --> 00:04:10,453
- TRIPTANK.
125
00:04:10,451 --> 00:04:11,221
- HELLO, YEAH.
126
00:04:11,218 --> 00:04:12,478
I'M CALLIN' ABOUT A LASS,
127
00:04:12,486 --> 00:04:13,516
A WOMAN FOR ME TO BREED WITH.
128
00:04:13,520 --> 00:04:15,650
ANY ONE'LL DO
AS LONG AS SHE'S GOT
129
00:04:15,656 --> 00:04:18,316
GOOD CHILDBEARING HIPS.
130
00:04:18,325 --> 00:04:20,725
I WANT HER TO SQUIRT ME OUT
A WEE 'UN,
131
00:04:20,728 --> 00:04:21,458
A YOUNG LADDIE, HEY.
132
00:04:21,462 --> 00:04:24,462
I WANT HER TO
HAVE [bleep] TIGER.
133
00:04:24,465 --> 00:04:24,895
- OKAY.
134
00:04:24,898 --> 00:04:27,598
- MAKE SURE HER FALLOPIAN TUBES
ARE WIDE OPEN.
135
00:04:27,601 --> 00:04:29,501
AND I WANT HER
WITH BIG TITS, RIGHT,
136
00:04:29,503 --> 00:04:33,273
WITH ROUND AREOLAS
THAT I CAN LAND A HELICOPTER ON.
137
00:04:33,806 --> 00:04:35,266
- PLEASE HOLD.
138
00:04:40,613 --> 00:04:41,913
- OH!
139
00:04:41,915 --> 00:04:45,075
- SHEENA, ARE YOU READY
TO PUSH FOR ME, SWEETIE?
140
00:04:45,085 --> 00:04:46,075
- YEAH.
141
00:04:46,086 --> 00:04:46,946
[screams]
142
00:04:46,954 --> 00:04:48,524
- OH, MY GOD!
143
00:04:48,522 --> 00:04:49,622
- WHAT? WHAT?
144
00:04:49,623 --> 00:04:51,063
WHAT'S WRONG WITH MY BABY?
145
00:04:51,058 --> 00:04:51,958
- IT'S TERRIBLE!
146
00:04:51,959 --> 00:04:54,359
IT'S A RED PIECE OF CLOTH.
147
00:04:54,361 --> 00:04:55,031
[mimics crying]
148
00:04:55,029 --> 00:04:56,159
- WHAT?
149
00:04:56,163 --> 00:04:57,733
- NO, IT'S GREEN.
NO, IT'S BLUE.
150
00:04:57,731 --> 00:04:58,701
YELLOW. ORANGE. RED. PURPLE.
151
00:04:58,699 --> 00:05:01,169
IT'S LIKE IT DOESN'T KNOW
WHAT IT WANTS TO BE.
152
00:05:01,168 --> 00:05:01,798
BOOM!
UP TOP.
153
00:05:01,802 --> 00:05:04,802
- DOCTOR, THAT'S
A LITTLE INSENSITIVE.
154
00:05:04,805 --> 00:05:05,835
- OH, YOU SOUND UPSET.
155
00:05:05,839 --> 00:05:08,409
DIDN'T GET THAT RAISE
YOU WANTED?
156
00:05:08,409 --> 00:05:12,339
OOH, HOW ABOUT I REACH
BEHIND YOUR EAR AND--UH-OH!
157
00:05:12,346 --> 00:05:15,646
LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE CAN AFFORD
TO PAY THE PARKING METER,
158
00:05:15,649 --> 00:05:19,379
UNLESS YOU WANT TO GET
A GAME OF QUARTERS GOIN'.
159
00:05:19,386 --> 00:05:20,086
- OW!
160
00:05:20,087 --> 00:05:21,247
- INTO THE SLOT MACHINE.
161
00:05:21,255 --> 00:05:22,445
COME ON, SEVENS!
162
00:05:22,456 --> 00:05:24,986
BLING, BLING,
BLING, BLING, BLING.
163
00:05:24,992 --> 00:05:25,362
JACKPOT!
164
00:05:25,359 --> 00:05:28,229
GUESS WHO CAN RETIRE NOW?
165
00:05:28,228 --> 00:05:28,928
- DR. GLASGOW!
166
00:05:28,929 --> 00:05:31,729
- FINE, LET'S SEE WHAT'S INSIDE.
167
00:05:31,732 --> 00:05:33,202
- GOOD AFTERNOON, PASSENGERS.
168
00:05:33,200 --> 00:05:34,030
THIS IS YOUR CAPTAIN SPEAKING.
169
00:05:34,034 --> 00:05:37,144
WE ARE BEGINNING
OUR DESCENT INTO BUDAPEST.
170
00:05:37,137 --> 00:05:41,437
THE OUTSIDE TEMPERATURE IS
A PLEASANT 26 DEGREES CELSIUS,
171
00:05:41,442 --> 00:05:44,482
AND OUR ESTIMATED TIME
OF ARRIVAL IS...
172
00:05:44,478 --> 00:05:46,378
4:20.
173
00:05:46,380 --> 00:05:47,610
- NICE.
174
00:05:47,614 --> 00:05:50,254
- NICE.
175
00:05:50,250 --> 00:05:52,250
- NICE.
176
00:06:08,434 --> 00:06:09,104
[telephone rings]
177
00:06:09,103 --> 00:06:10,573
- TRIPTANK.
HOW CAN I HELP YOU?
178
00:06:10,571 --> 00:06:11,971
- HEY, MY NAME IS TIM.
179
00:06:11,972 --> 00:06:14,112
HOW COME AIN'T NO FAT BITCHES
ON THE SHOW?
180
00:06:14,108 --> 00:06:16,508
Y'ALL HAVE VERY FEW
FAT BITCHES ON THE SHOW.
181
00:06:16,510 --> 00:06:18,610
I ENJOY A BIG WOMAN
182
00:06:18,612 --> 00:06:21,552
WITH SOMEBODY I CAN HIDE
MY CANDY BARS INSIDE
183
00:06:21,548 --> 00:06:22,878
UNDERNEATH THEY FAT ROLLS,
184
00:06:22,883 --> 00:06:27,093
AND I'M SEEIN' VERY FEW--
I'M A FAT MAN MYSELF.
185
00:06:27,087 --> 00:06:30,217
YOU CAN PROBABLY TELL BY
MY INTER THROAT FATNESS
186
00:06:30,224 --> 00:06:30,924
WHEN I SPEAK.
187
00:06:30,924 --> 00:06:32,124
BUT I'M SEEIN'
VERY FEW FAT BI--
188
00:06:32,126 --> 00:06:35,756
MY ONLY NOTE FOR THE SHOW--
MORE FAT BITCHES.
189
00:06:35,763 --> 00:06:37,833
- THAT WOULD BE
THE FAT BITCH DEPARTMENT.
190
00:06:37,831 --> 00:06:38,631
LET ME TRANSFER YOU NOW.
191
00:06:38,632 --> 00:06:41,502
- ¶ THREE ALIENS
CAME FROM THE SKY ¶
192
00:06:41,502 --> 00:06:42,832
¶ THE GALACTIC COUNCIL
SENT THEM ¶
193
00:06:42,836 --> 00:06:44,596
all:
¶ AND HERE'S THE REASON WHY
194
00:06:44,605 --> 00:06:45,595
- ¶ THEIR MISSION IS TO STUDY
195
00:06:45,606 --> 00:06:48,606
¶ EARTH'S MOST AVERAGE GUY
196
00:06:48,609 --> 00:06:50,779
all: ¶ TO SEE IF HUMANS
ARE WORTH SAVIN' ¶
197
00:06:50,778 --> 00:06:53,378
¶ OR IF EVERYONE HAS TO DIE
198
00:06:53,646 --> 00:06:55,346
- WAIT, WHAT?
199
00:06:58,584 --> 00:06:59,794
- SEE YOU AROUND, JEFF.
200
00:06:59,787 --> 00:07:00,717
WE'RE GOIN' HOME.
201
00:07:00,721 --> 00:07:01,991
OUR MISSION'S OVER.
202
00:07:01,989 --> 00:07:03,049
- REALLY?
203
00:07:03,056 --> 00:07:03,586
WHY?
204
00:07:03,590 --> 00:07:04,690
- ONE OF THE MAIN REASONS
WE WERE SENT HERE
205
00:07:04,691 --> 00:07:08,191
WAS TO FIND OUT IF HUMANS
WERE CAPABLE OF LOVE.
206
00:07:08,195 --> 00:07:11,595
- AND ALL WE WERE ABLE TO
SHOW 'EM WAS THIS OLD THING.
207
00:07:12,265 --> 00:07:15,665
- LINDA, I'VE GOT SOMETHING
I WANT TO SAY.
208
00:07:15,669 --> 00:07:17,969
WELL, SING.
209
00:07:17,971 --> 00:07:19,641
¶ LINDA
210
00:07:19,640 --> 00:07:21,910
¶ THE MOST BEAUTIFUL GIRL
211
00:07:21,909 --> 00:07:24,609
¶ IN THE WORLD-A
212
00:07:24,611 --> 00:07:25,711
CHECK IT OUT!
213
00:07:25,712 --> 00:07:27,552
MY WHOLE FAMILY'S HERE!
214
00:07:27,548 --> 00:07:29,348
all: ¶ LINDA
215
00:07:29,349 --> 00:07:34,019
¶ WE WANT YOU
TO JOIN OUR FAMILY ¶
216
00:07:34,021 --> 00:07:34,851
- UH...HUH...
- LINDA?
217
00:07:34,855 --> 00:07:36,555
LINDA, WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
218
00:07:36,557 --> 00:07:37,357
GUYS, PLEASE!
219
00:07:37,357 --> 00:07:39,257
I TOLD YOU I NEVER WANT TO
SEE THAT VIDEO AGAIN.
220
00:07:39,259 --> 00:07:43,559
- WE ALSO SUBMITTED
75-PLUS HOURS OF THIS.
221
00:07:43,763 --> 00:07:46,063
- OH, LINDA.
222
00:07:46,066 --> 00:07:46,496
[crying]
223
00:07:46,500 --> 00:07:50,140
- I TOLD YOU GUYS NOT TO
RECORD ME DURING JEFF TIME.
224
00:07:50,137 --> 00:07:51,137
- YEAH, BUT AFTER REVIEWING
THE DATA,
225
00:07:51,138 --> 00:07:53,438
THE GALACTIC COUNCIL DECIDED
IT WOULD BE BEST
226
00:07:53,440 --> 00:07:54,910
TO JUST VAPORIZE
THE WHOLE PLANET.
227
00:07:54,908 --> 00:07:56,708
- WAIT, WHAT ARE YOU
TALKING ABOUT?
228
00:07:56,710 --> 00:07:57,380
YOU CAN'T DO THAT.
229
00:07:57,377 --> 00:07:59,177
THIS IS AN AMAZING
AND BEAUTIFUL PLACE--
230
00:07:59,179 --> 00:08:00,779
- WHOA, WHOA, WHOA!
SLOW DOWN, BUDDY.
231
00:08:00,781 --> 00:08:03,181
ALL YOU GOT TO DO
IS GET OUT THERE
232
00:08:03,183 --> 00:08:04,253
AND MAKE LOVE TO SOMEBODY
233
00:08:04,251 --> 00:08:06,021
BEFORE THE ANNIHILATION FLEET
GETS HERE.
234
00:08:06,019 --> 00:08:09,089
- THAT'S ALL I GOT TO DO.
OKAY, HOW MUCH TIME DO I HAVE?
235
00:08:09,089 --> 00:08:10,259
- 23 MINUTES.
236
00:08:10,257 --> 00:08:13,017
[gasps]
237
00:08:13,026 --> 00:08:14,956
- HI, CAN I BUY YOU A DRINK?
238
00:08:14,962 --> 00:08:15,492
- SURE.
239
00:08:15,496 --> 00:08:16,526
I GUESS I'LL HAVE A VODKA TONIC.
240
00:08:16,530 --> 00:08:17,500
NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, WAIT.
241
00:08:17,498 --> 00:08:19,358
MAYBE I WANT A WHITE WINE.
242
00:08:19,366 --> 00:08:20,826
- OKAY--
- EXCEPT YOU KNOW WHAT?
243
00:08:20,834 --> 00:08:21,774
THEY NEVER HAVE GOOD WINE
AT BARS.
244
00:08:21,768 --> 00:08:23,798
HAVE YOU NOTICED THAT?
- UH-HUH, THEY--
245
00:08:23,804 --> 00:08:25,544
- OKAY,
I WANT A DRINK.
246
00:08:25,539 --> 00:08:27,809
WHAT DRINK DO I WANT?
UH, I CAN DO THIS!
247
00:08:27,808 --> 00:08:30,638
- HEY, YOU WANT TO END UP
A SCORCHED CORPSE?
248
00:08:30,644 --> 00:08:31,814
MAKE UP YOUR [bleep] MIND.
249
00:08:31,812 --> 00:08:34,012
- OOH, I AM NOT GOING DOWN
THIS ROAD AGAIN.
250
00:08:34,014 --> 00:08:35,254
- EVERYBODY LISTEN TO ME.
251
00:08:35,249 --> 00:08:39,219
THIS MAY SOUND CRAZY,
BUT ALIEN SHIPS ARE COMING,
252
00:08:39,219 --> 00:08:40,689
AND THEY'RE GONNA KILL US
ALL UNLESS
253
00:08:40,687 --> 00:08:43,717
SOMEONE IN THIS BAR
HAS SEX WITH ME,
254
00:08:43,724 --> 00:08:46,294
AND THE CLOCK IS TICKIN',
LADIES.
255
00:08:46,293 --> 00:08:47,693
WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!
256
00:08:47,694 --> 00:08:48,394
WE'RE ALL GONNA--OH!
257
00:08:48,395 --> 00:08:50,955
[groans]
258
00:08:50,964 --> 00:08:51,664
IT'S OVER.
259
00:08:51,665 --> 00:08:52,425
- ¶ LINDA
- WHAT?
260
00:08:52,432 --> 00:08:57,242
- CHECK IT OUT.
IT'S THE DUDE FROM THE VIDEO.
261
00:08:57,237 --> 00:08:57,767
- LINDA.
262
00:08:57,771 --> 00:09:00,341
LINDA!
263
00:09:02,308 --> 00:09:03,938
LINDA!
264
00:09:03,944 --> 00:09:04,984
- JEFF?
265
00:09:04,978 --> 00:09:06,378
- LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING.
266
00:09:06,380 --> 00:09:10,620
EVERY BEAUTIFUL THING
ON THIS PLANET,
267
00:09:10,617 --> 00:09:11,947
EVERY MOTHER AND CHILD,
268
00:09:11,952 --> 00:09:16,762
EVERY BEE DRINKING NECTAR
FROM A FLOWER...
269
00:09:16,757 --> 00:09:19,217
IF IT SEES
THE LIGHT OF DAY TOMORROW,
270
00:09:19,226 --> 00:09:23,526
IT'S ONLY BECAUSE
OF THE STRENGTH OF OUR LOVE.
271
00:09:23,530 --> 00:09:26,530
- I DON'T KNOW IF I TOTALLY
UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU MEAN,
272
00:09:26,533 --> 00:09:28,233
BUT IT SOUNDS BEAUTIFUL.
273
00:09:28,235 --> 00:09:29,365
YOU WANT TO COME IN?
274
00:09:29,369 --> 00:09:31,999
- OH, THANK JESUS.
275
00:09:32,005 --> 00:09:34,305
[both moaning]
276
00:09:34,308 --> 00:09:38,108
- WELL, PERHAPS WE'VE
UNDERESTIMATED THIS PLANET.
277
00:09:38,111 --> 00:09:40,711
POWER DOWN THE DEATH RAYS.
278
00:09:41,547 --> 00:09:46,017
[choir singing
in foreign language]
279
00:09:46,019 --> 00:09:52,759
¶
280
00:09:52,759 --> 00:09:54,759
- SIR, YOU MIGHT WANT TO
LOOK AT THIS.
281
00:09:54,761 --> 00:09:58,001
- SERIOUSLY, JEFF, IT'S JUST--
IT'S NOT A BIG DEAL.
282
00:09:57,998 --> 00:09:59,258
- NO, NO, NO.
I--THIS IS WEIRD.
283
00:09:59,266 --> 00:10:01,926
THIS NEVER HAPPENS TO ME.
284
00:10:01,935 --> 00:10:04,535
I MEAN, MAYBE
I DRANK TOO MUCH WHISKEY.
285
00:10:04,538 --> 00:10:05,538
HEY, CAN I SEE YOUR LAPTOP?
286
00:10:05,539 --> 00:10:09,309
MAYBE IF I LOOKED AT SOME PORN
OR SOME--
287
00:10:09,309 --> 00:10:10,839
AAH!
288
00:10:10,844 --> 00:10:12,344
[boom]
289
00:10:12,346 --> 00:10:13,506
[telephone ringing]
290
00:10:13,513 --> 00:10:15,113
- TRIPTANK.
- LISTEN, HELLO.
291
00:10:15,115 --> 00:10:17,675
YES, I'M CALLING TO
GET A WOMAN,
292
00:10:17,684 --> 00:10:19,584
AND I'M THINKING
OF GOING BLACK.
293
00:10:19,586 --> 00:10:21,516
I LOVE THE AFRICAN WOMEN.
294
00:10:21,521 --> 00:10:23,991
I LOVE THEIR RHYTHMS
AND THEIR BOTTOMS.
295
00:10:23,991 --> 00:10:24,761
- THERE'S NO WOMEN HERE.
296
00:10:24,758 --> 00:10:26,688
- WELL, I MEAN,
THERE'S A FEW WOMEN HERE.
297
00:10:26,693 --> 00:10:29,533
- YES, JUST GET IT NICE
AND BLACKIE.
298
00:11:18,310 --> 00:11:22,380
[aggressive rock music]
299
00:11:22,382 --> 00:11:25,922
[tense guitar music]
300
00:13:00,312 --> 00:13:04,452
[aggressive rock music]
301
00:13:04,451 --> 00:13:06,521
¶
302
00:13:20,065 --> 00:13:21,325
- CARL?
HEY. HEY, CARL.
303
00:13:21,334 --> 00:13:23,174
CARL, DID YOU EAT ALL
THE CINNAMON TOAST CRUNCH?
304
00:13:23,170 --> 00:13:24,640
- HOLD IT.
SHUT UP FOR A SECOND.
305
00:13:24,638 --> 00:13:25,768
- CARL?
- HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT
306
00:13:25,772 --> 00:13:28,042
I JUST REALIZED
IS AWESOME ABOUT GOOGLE?
307
00:13:28,041 --> 00:13:29,571
GOOGLE'S NAME SPELLED BACKWARDS
308
00:13:29,576 --> 00:13:31,536
IS THE SAME
AS ITS NAME IN SPANISH.
309
00:13:31,545 --> 00:13:32,575
- ELGOOG?
310
00:13:32,579 --> 00:13:34,809
- THAT'S BRANDING ON
A WHOLE OTHER LEVEL, MAN.
311
00:13:34,815 --> 00:13:36,675
LIKE 3-D CHECKERS AND SHIT.
312
00:13:36,683 --> 00:13:37,723
- ELGOOG.
- GOOGLE'S ALL POWERFUL!
313
00:13:37,717 --> 00:13:39,547
THERE'S NOTHING GOOGLE
CAN'T GOOGLE.
314
00:13:39,553 --> 00:13:41,893
- I COULD STUMP THE GOOG.
- [scoffs]
315
00:13:41,888 --> 00:13:44,358
IF ANYBODY'S GONNA STUMP
THE GOOG, IT'S GONNA BE ME.
316
00:13:44,357 --> 00:13:46,017
- OH, YEAH?
- OH, YEAH.
317
00:13:46,026 --> 00:13:48,256
- OH, YEAH?
- OH, YEAH.
318
00:13:48,261 --> 00:13:49,061
- YOU'RE ON.
319
00:13:49,062 --> 00:13:52,232
both: STUMP THE GOOG!
320
00:13:52,232 --> 00:13:53,502
[acid guitar]
321
00:13:53,500 --> 00:13:55,570
- AND WE'RE IN.
- YEAH, ME FIRST.
322
00:13:55,569 --> 00:14:00,469
GOOGLE A MONKEY RAPING
A SOCK MONKEY.
323
00:14:00,473 --> 00:14:01,713
- [screeching]
324
00:14:01,708 --> 00:14:03,208
- [laughing]
OH, YOU'RE WELCOME!
325
00:14:03,210 --> 00:14:04,380
- GOOGLE CATACORN.
326
00:14:04,377 --> 00:14:05,637
- [meow]
327
00:14:05,645 --> 00:14:08,375
- OKAY, GOOGLE A MONKEY
RAPING A BANANA.
328
00:14:08,381 --> 00:14:11,151
- WHAT IS WITH YOUR
MONKEY RAPING THING?
329
00:14:11,151 --> 00:14:12,581
- [screeching]
330
00:14:12,586 --> 00:14:14,086
OKAY, LET'S DANCE.
331
00:14:14,087 --> 00:14:15,217
CLOWN DOING LAUNDRY.
332
00:14:15,222 --> 00:14:16,392
- CELEBRITY COLONOSCOPIES.
333
00:14:16,389 --> 00:14:17,859
- MEXICAN LEPRECHAUN.
334
00:14:17,858 --> 00:14:19,218
- PIÑATAS GONE WILD.
335
00:14:19,226 --> 00:14:19,816
- WOOKIE NOOGIE.
336
00:14:19,826 --> 00:14:21,286
- EROTIC SHRUBBERY.
337
00:14:21,294 --> 00:14:23,164
- MIDGET NINJAS WHO ALSO MIME.
338
00:14:23,163 --> 00:14:24,063
- QUADRIPLEGIC STRIPPER.
339
00:14:24,064 --> 00:14:25,904
- URINE BLOWBACK.
- ASS CARPET.
340
00:14:25,899 --> 00:14:27,499
- SEXY JESUS.
- PLATY [bleep].
341
00:14:27,500 --> 00:14:28,700
- FICUS FLIGHT CLUB.
- SHARDS OF GLASS-CICLE.
342
00:14:28,702 --> 00:14:31,042
- PUBE OF THE MONTH CLUB.
- SACK-O-LANTERN.
343
00:14:31,037 --> 00:14:32,467
- GOLLUM ON VACATION.
- EJACULA.
344
00:14:32,472 --> 00:14:34,472
- TAMPON TEA.
- MUPPETS GETTIN' BUSY.
345
00:14:34,474 --> 00:14:35,474
- FRUIT PORN!
346
00:14:35,475 --> 00:14:36,235
- JESUS, DUDE.
347
00:14:36,243 --> 00:14:37,583
OH, I GOT ONE!
MOVE.
348
00:14:37,577 --> 00:14:40,377
A MONKEY RAPING--OW!
349
00:14:40,380 --> 00:14:41,350
- GREETINGS, MY FRIENDS.
350
00:14:41,348 --> 00:14:44,418
DO YOU MIND IF I UPLOAD MYSELF?
351
00:14:45,551 --> 00:14:49,451
I AM ELGOOG,
KEEPER OF THE GOOGLE.
352
00:14:49,456 --> 00:14:50,216
[retches]
353
00:14:50,223 --> 00:14:52,493
- WHAT THE [bleep]?
- OH, GOD.
354
00:14:52,492 --> 00:14:56,162
- I MUST INSIST
THE TWO OF YOU--HOW DO YOU SAY?
355
00:14:56,162 --> 00:14:57,262
CUT THE SHIT.
356
00:14:57,264 --> 00:14:58,604
THE GOOGLE IS NOT A TOY.
357
00:14:58,598 --> 00:15:01,128
IT IS A TOOL
TO BE USED RESPONSIBLY
358
00:15:01,134 --> 00:15:02,074
TO ACCESS INFORMATION,
359
00:15:02,068 --> 00:15:03,698
AND, OF COURSE,
FOR THE BOOBIES.
360
00:15:03,703 --> 00:15:07,173
IT IS NOT FOR YOU TWO DIPSHITS
TO GOOGLE WILLY-NILLY.
361
00:15:07,173 --> 00:15:08,773
- HEY, THIS IS AMERICA,
GOOGLE LARD ASS,
362
00:15:08,775 --> 00:15:12,935
AND I DON'T RECALL GOOGLING
SEÑOR BABY FAT [bleep] FACE.
363
00:15:12,946 --> 00:15:13,906
WE DIDN'T, DID WE, ANU?
364
00:15:13,914 --> 00:15:16,284
- NO, BUT MAYBE WE SHOULD.
365
00:15:16,283 --> 00:15:17,523
GOOGLE ELGOOG.
366
00:15:17,517 --> 00:15:18,647
- NO, NO.
YOU CANNOT GOOGLE THE GOOGLE!
367
00:15:18,652 --> 00:15:22,422
I COMMAND YOU TO STOP!
[yelling]
368
00:15:22,422 --> 00:15:24,892
[boom]
369
00:15:25,424 --> 00:15:27,534
- ANU.
370
00:15:27,527 --> 00:15:29,087
- WHAT?
371
00:15:29,095 --> 00:15:30,295
- I DID EAT ALL
THE CINNAMON TOAST CRUNCH.
372
00:15:30,297 --> 00:15:32,097
[telephone rings]
373
00:15:32,098 --> 00:15:33,298
- IT'S TRIPTANK.
- HI.
374
00:15:33,300 --> 00:15:35,600
I'M JUST SITTIN' HERE
WATCHIN' TV.
375
00:15:35,602 --> 00:15:37,442
AND KIND OF RUBBING MYSELF
TO YOUR CARTOON.
376
00:15:37,437 --> 00:15:39,437
I REALLY LIKE IT.
377
00:15:39,439 --> 00:15:41,209
- UH, THANK YOU.
378
00:15:41,207 --> 00:15:43,877
- ARE YOU THE GUY
WHO MAKES THE CARTOON?
379
00:15:43,877 --> 00:15:45,037
- UH...I-I GUESS SO.
380
00:15:45,045 --> 00:15:46,775
- CARTOONS REALLY GET ME HOT.
381
00:15:46,780 --> 00:15:48,250
ANYTHING CAN HAPPEN IN THEM.
382
00:15:48,248 --> 00:15:50,548
THAT'S FROM
TWILIGHT ZONE THE MOVIE.
383
00:15:50,550 --> 00:15:51,220
I'M SUPER BLOND,
384
00:15:51,217 --> 00:15:53,947
AND I'M, LIKE, A SIZE ZERO
WITH HUGE TITS.
385
00:15:53,954 --> 00:15:54,954
WHAT DO YOU LOOK LIKE?
- UM...
386
00:15:54,955 --> 00:15:55,915
- YOU KNOW WHAT?
I DON'T CARE.
387
00:15:55,922 --> 00:15:58,322
JUST TELL ME THAT
YOU WANT TO [bleep].
388
00:15:58,325 --> 00:15:59,785
- WAIT, WHAT?
WAIT A MINUTE.
389
00:15:59,793 --> 00:16:00,893
YOU MEAN ALL THE WAY
DOWN THERE?
390
00:16:00,894 --> 00:16:03,364
- GOD, OH, MY GOD, YOU JUST SAID
SOMETHING SO FUNNY ON TV.
391
00:16:03,363 --> 00:16:04,003
I CAN'T TAKE IT.
392
00:16:03,997 --> 00:16:04,727
- I DON'T UNDERSTAND.
393
00:16:04,731 --> 00:16:07,101
- I'M TOTALLY [bleep] MYSELF
RIGHT NOW.
394
00:16:07,100 --> 00:16:08,030
- W-W-W-W-W-WAIT--
- OH, MY GOD!
395
00:16:08,034 --> 00:16:10,374
SOMETHING SO AMAZING
JUST HAPPENED IN THE SHOW.
396
00:16:10,370 --> 00:16:11,740
[gasps]
COME ON, JUST TELL ME
397
00:16:11,738 --> 00:16:13,338
THAT YOU LIKE MY TITS
AND YOU WANT TO [bleep].
398
00:16:13,340 --> 00:16:15,910
- HELLO, TRIPTANK.
HELLO, TRIPTANK.
399
00:16:15,909 --> 00:16:17,279
HELLO, TRIPTANK.
HELLO, TRIPTANK.
400
00:16:17,277 --> 00:16:18,737
HELLO, TRIPTANK.
HELLO...
401
00:16:18,745 --> 00:16:22,645
TRI-TRI-TRI-TRIPTANK--TRIPTANK-
TANK-TANK-TANK-TANK.
402
00:16:22,649 --> 00:16:25,149
- AW, SHIT.
SKIPPY'S GOT A GLITCH.
403
00:16:25,151 --> 00:16:27,121
- WHAT DO YOU SAY
WE CUT HER IN HALF?
404
00:16:27,120 --> 00:16:32,220
WHO'S IN THE MOOD FOR
A WACKY, SPLACKY C-SECTION?
405
00:16:32,225 --> 00:16:32,955
[toot]
- ABSOLUTELY NOT.
406
00:16:32,959 --> 00:16:34,329
NOW, IF WE CAN GET BACK
TO THIS DELIVERY, I--
407
00:16:34,327 --> 00:16:36,997
- WHAT'S THAT?
I THINK I SEE A RABBIT
408
00:16:36,997 --> 00:16:38,097
IN THAT FURRY, MEATY,
409
00:16:38,098 --> 00:16:40,028
HAM-FLAVORED PENIS COZY
OF YOURS.
410
00:16:40,033 --> 00:16:43,203
LET'S INVESTIGATE.
411
00:16:43,203 --> 00:16:44,143
- [shrieks]
412
00:16:44,137 --> 00:16:46,297
[Muzak playing]
413
00:16:46,306 --> 00:16:49,806
¶
414
00:16:49,809 --> 00:16:50,809
- AAH!
415
00:16:50,810 --> 00:16:54,950
¶
416
00:16:54,948 --> 00:16:56,708
- WAH!
417
00:16:56,716 --> 00:16:57,976
OH!
418
00:16:57,984 --> 00:16:59,424
NO RABBIT,
JUST A BABY.
419
00:16:59,419 --> 00:17:01,289
- OH, THANK GOODNESS.
420
00:17:01,287 --> 00:17:02,847
IS IT A BOY OR A GIRL?
421
00:17:02,856 --> 00:17:05,456
- [laughs]
422
00:17:05,458 --> 00:17:07,488
KA-POW!
MAGIC.
423
00:17:07,494 --> 00:17:08,564
- OH, NO!
424
00:17:08,561 --> 00:17:09,761
MY BABY!
MY BABY!
425
00:17:09,763 --> 00:17:10,803
- THE HELL JUST HAPPENED,
DOCTOR?
426
00:17:10,797 --> 00:17:13,057
- RELAX,
IT'S ALL AN ILLUSION.
427
00:17:13,066 --> 00:17:16,266
YOUR BABY IS SAFELY
NESTLED RIGHT HERE.
428
00:17:16,269 --> 00:17:18,369
WA-NA-NA-NA-NA-NA-NA.
429
00:17:18,371 --> 00:17:19,101
- [crying]
430
00:17:19,105 --> 00:17:20,435
- WAIT, WAIT,
HOW--WHAT THE--
431
00:17:20,440 --> 00:17:21,640
- YAY.
YAY!
432
00:17:21,641 --> 00:17:23,071
OH, DON'T DO THAT TO ME.
433
00:17:23,076 --> 00:17:25,306
YOU KNOW, I NEARLY
HAD A HEART ATTACK.
434
00:17:25,311 --> 00:17:28,281
THANK YOU, DOCTOR,
FOR DELIVERING MY BABY.
435
00:17:28,281 --> 00:17:29,081
- IMPOSSIBLE!
436
00:17:29,082 --> 00:17:31,052
WE JUST ALL WITNESSED YOU
EAT THAT NEWBORN.
437
00:17:31,051 --> 00:17:33,221
WHAT, WERE YOU WALKING AROUND
WITH A FAKE BABY
438
00:17:33,219 --> 00:17:35,119
COVERED IN CORN SYRUP
OR SOMETHING?
439
00:17:35,121 --> 00:17:36,051
WHERE WOULD YOU EVEN PUT THAT?
440
00:17:36,056 --> 00:17:38,616
- A MAGICIAN NEVER REVEALS
HIS SECRETS.
441
00:17:38,625 --> 00:17:41,085
UMBILICAL CORD BLOWUP ANIMAL,
ANYONE?
442
00:17:45,264 --> 00:17:47,334
- WELL, THANK YOU, DOCTOR.
443
00:17:47,333 --> 00:17:50,473
MAY I HOLD HIM?
- ABSOLUTELY.
444
00:17:50,470 --> 00:17:51,370
WUMP-WUMP.
445
00:17:51,371 --> 00:17:53,101
JUST KIDDING.
446
00:17:55,274 --> 00:17:55,914
- OH, GOD, RIGHT.
447
00:17:55,909 --> 00:17:59,139
SO BEFORE WE HAVE
ANY COMPLICATIONS, GUYS,
448
00:17:59,145 --> 00:18:00,475
LET'S GO IN THERE
AND GET THE OTHER BABY.
449
00:18:00,480 --> 00:18:03,380
- WHAT?
I'M HAVING TWINS?
450
00:18:03,383 --> 00:18:04,053
- DAMN IT, HARRISON.
451
00:18:04,050 --> 00:18:06,250
I TOLD YOU A MAGICIAN
NEVER REVEALS HIS SECRETS!
452
00:18:15,260 --> 00:18:19,100
- THIS TIME,
WE DO IT RIGHT, HOMEY.
453
00:18:19,099 --> 00:18:21,499
WE GONNA END THIS GAME
RIGHT HERE.
454
00:18:21,501 --> 00:18:23,031
OH!
455
00:18:23,036 --> 00:18:23,866
OH!
456
00:18:23,870 --> 00:18:24,870
NOW WHO PLAYIN'?
457
00:18:24,871 --> 00:18:27,671
NOW WHO PLAYIN'?
458
00:18:27,674 --> 00:18:30,174
[tires squealing]
459
00:18:31,510 --> 00:18:33,510
- HEY, BOYS,
YOU FORGOT YOUR PRIZE!
460
00:18:33,513 --> 00:18:34,313
IT'S ADORABLE.
461
00:18:34,314 --> 00:18:39,654
- THIS PHASE COAGULATOR LOOKS
LIKE A LUMP OF BURNT SPAGHETTI.
462
00:18:39,652 --> 00:18:40,252
JESUS H. CHRIST!
463
00:18:40,253 --> 00:18:42,353
COME ON, FRANKENSTEIN.
SPARK UP AGAIN, MAN.
464
00:18:42,355 --> 00:18:43,785
[machinery whirring,
phone ringing]
465
00:18:43,790 --> 00:18:46,820
MAN, I OUGHT TO JUST DUMP
THIS HUNK IN THE FRY DADDY
466
00:18:46,826 --> 00:18:48,786
AND MELT HIM DOWN
FOR BEER MONEY.
467
00:18:48,795 --> 00:18:50,025
AH! GOD DAMN IT!
468
00:18:50,029 --> 00:18:52,099
- HELLO,
TRI-TRI-TRI-TRIPTAN-TRIPTANK.
469
00:18:52,098 --> 00:18:53,828
- STILL HOT JUICE
IN THIS SON OF A BITCH.
470
00:18:53,833 --> 00:18:55,433
ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE,
INDEED.
471
00:18:55,435 --> 00:18:56,595
- HELLO, TRIPTANK.
HELLO, TRIPTANK.
472
00:18:56,603 --> 00:18:59,143
- OPTIMUS DROP-A-DIME
HUNK OF JUNK OF SHIT.
473
00:18:59,139 --> 00:19:00,369
SECRETARABOT 2500, MY ASS.
474
00:19:00,373 --> 00:19:04,843
MORE LIKE HUNK OF SHIT-O-BOT
NEGATIVE FIVE.
475
00:19:12,684 --> 00:19:17,564
[techno music]
476
00:19:29,868 --> 00:19:31,138
[tires screeching,
girls screaming]
477
00:19:31,137 --> 00:19:34,537
[aggressive rock music]
478
00:19:34,541 --> 00:19:36,211
¶
479
00:19:36,209 --> 00:19:39,439
[both grunting]
480
00:19:39,445 --> 00:19:41,405
- THE MEAT COMPARTMENT
IS TOO SMALL
481
00:19:41,414 --> 00:19:42,254
FOR A SALAMI THAT BIG.
482
00:19:42,248 --> 00:19:44,448
- I CAN GET IT IN THERE
WITH ENOUGH FORCE.
483
00:19:44,450 --> 00:19:46,480
JUST BEAR WITH ME, DEBBIE.
484
00:19:46,486 --> 00:19:46,916
[screams]
485
00:19:46,920 --> 00:19:48,950
- OKAY,
STOP, STOP, STOP, STOP!
486
00:19:48,955 --> 00:19:50,285
TRY EASING IT IN
SLOWLY AND GENTLY.
487
00:19:50,290 --> 00:19:51,120
- OKAY.
488
00:19:51,124 --> 00:19:52,994
[both grunting]
489
00:19:52,992 --> 00:19:53,962
- WELL, DON'T JUST STAY THERE.
490
00:19:53,960 --> 00:19:54,830
LET'S GET THIS THING GOING.
491
00:19:54,827 --> 00:19:58,857
I MEAN, BACHELOR COMES ON
IN 15 MINUTES.
492
00:19:58,865 --> 00:20:03,165
- MOM, DAD, ARE YOU GUYS DONE
UNLOADING THE GROCERIES YET?
493
00:20:03,169 --> 00:20:05,539
- NOPE, STOPPED TO
HAVE ANAL SEX.
494
00:20:05,538 --> 00:20:08,008
- [shrieks]
- DAMN IT.
495
00:20:08,007 --> 00:20:08,767
YOU KNOW, YOU HAVE A KID,
496
00:20:08,775 --> 00:20:09,835
YOU GET ONE SECOND
OF FREE TIME NEVER.
497
00:20:09,842 --> 00:20:11,882
[telephone ringing]
- TIDY IT UP.
498
00:20:11,878 --> 00:20:12,778
THAT'S THAT.
499
00:20:12,779 --> 00:20:15,449
ALL RIGHT, BIG FELLOW,
GIVE IT A SHOT.
500
00:20:15,448 --> 00:20:16,678
- [stuttering]
501
00:20:16,683 --> 00:20:17,183
TRIPTANK.
502
00:20:17,183 --> 00:20:19,153
- HELLO, SCUMBAG?
YEAH, LISTEN TO THIS, ALL RIGHT?
503
00:20:19,152 --> 00:20:20,652
I KNOW YOUR [bleep]
GIRLFRIEND IS OUT
504
00:20:20,653 --> 00:20:22,493
[bleep] AROUND WITH
VINNIE MY BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW.
505
00:20:22,488 --> 00:20:25,418
WE GOT TO [bleep] GET TOGETHER
AND BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF THEM.
506
00:20:25,425 --> 00:20:27,085
THAT'S WHAT WE
GOT TO [bleep] DO.
507
00:20:27,093 --> 00:20:28,063
- OKAY.
- SHE'S GETTIN' [bleep]
508
00:20:28,061 --> 00:20:29,431
IN [bleep],
AND LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING.
509
00:20:29,429 --> 00:20:31,159
HE'S GOT A 9-INCH [bleep],
ALL RIGHT,
510
00:20:31,164 --> 00:20:32,034
AND HE CAN GO ALL NIGHT.
511
00:20:32,031 --> 00:20:33,931
MY NAME'S DENISE.
I LIVE ON FRONTLAND STREET.
512
00:20:33,933 --> 00:20:36,373
YOU KNOW WHAT, YOU COME UP,
I'LL GIVE YOU A BEER.
513
00:20:36,369 --> 00:20:37,439
I'LL GIVE YOU A LITTLE COCAINE.
514
00:20:37,437 --> 00:20:39,297
YOU [bleep] ME IN THE [bleep].
WE'LL GET 'EM BACK THAT WAY.
515
00:20:39,305 --> 00:20:40,165
- HA-HA-HA-HAVE A COOKIE.
516
00:20:40,173 --> 00:20:43,713
LET ME TRANSFER YOU TO
THAT DEPAR-PAR-PAR-PAR-PART--
517
00:20:43,710 --> 00:20:45,310
I'LL BE RIGHT THERE.
- THERE YOU GO, HUSTLER.
518
00:20:45,311 --> 00:20:46,941
GET ON THAT HORSE.
519
00:20:46,946 --> 00:20:49,146
RIDE IT DOWNTOWN,
RIGHT THROUGH THE STREETS.
520
00:20:49,148 --> 00:20:51,778
WHOO!
I'M REAL PROUD OF YOU, MAN.
521
00:21:03,262 --> 00:21:04,562
- ¶ HEY, WHAT'S UP, GUYS?
522
00:21:04,564 --> 00:21:06,064
¶ I'M ON TV
523
00:21:06,065 --> 00:21:10,395
¶ SO EVERYBODY
HAS TO LOOK AT ME ¶
524
00:21:10,403 --> 00:21:11,773
¶ SO LICK MY BALLS
525
00:21:11,771 --> 00:21:12,901
¶ AND SUCK ON MY D
526
00:21:12,905 --> 00:21:15,135
I'M JUST KIDDING, GUYS.
I TOTALLY RESPECT YOU.
527
00:21:15,141 --> 00:21:17,311
THANKS FOR WATCHING THE SHOW.
35843
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