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1
00:00:10,577 --> 00:00:15,048
[MUSIC PLAYING]
2
00:00:17,851 --> 00:00:21,788
WOMAN: Danny, don't splash me!
[LAUGHS]
3
00:00:21,788 --> 00:00:22,856
Stop. I'm getting wet.
4
00:00:22,856 --> 00:00:26,659
-MAN: That's the idea.
-[WOMAN GIGGLING]
5
00:00:27,494 --> 00:00:29,262
-WOMAN: Stop it.
-Hi, sweetie.
6
00:00:29,262 --> 00:00:30,497
MAN: Oh, come on!
7
00:00:30,497 --> 00:00:32,465
Come on,
let's go back to my place.
8
00:00:32,465 --> 00:00:34,067
WOMAN: Maybe we should wait.
9
00:00:34,067 --> 00:00:35,969
MAN: Wait, schmait!
10
00:00:37,670 --> 00:00:39,205
These two people
are not married,
11
00:00:39,205 --> 00:00:41,541
and they're going
to have premarital sex.
12
00:00:41,541 --> 00:00:43,209
You could go to hell for that.
13
00:00:43,209 --> 00:00:44,778
All right, that's it.
You're not allowed
14
00:00:44,778 --> 00:00:46,413
to watch this show anymore.
15
00:00:46,413 --> 00:00:49,215
It inspires urges that are...
16
00:00:49,215 --> 00:00:52,619
-wrong and bad.
-WOMAN: Let's go to your place.
17
00:00:52,619 --> 00:00:53,386
MAN: Groovy!
18
00:00:53,386 --> 00:00:55,588
You could go to hell
for those urges.
19
00:00:59,325 --> 00:01:01,795
In hell, there is a fire
20
00:01:01,795 --> 00:01:05,832
that will lap at you
for all eternity.
21
00:01:05,832 --> 00:01:07,767
You gotta decide...
22
00:01:07,767 --> 00:01:12,572
Do you want to go to heaven,
or do you wanna go to hell?
23
00:01:12,572 --> 00:01:14,240
-[GASPS]
-[ORGAN PLAYING]
24
00:01:14,240 --> 00:01:16,409
-[PANTING]
-[MAN GRUNTING]
25
00:01:16,409 --> 00:01:19,612
Yeah. You a bad girl? Huh?
You a bad girl?
26
00:01:19,612 --> 00:01:21,214
-I'm a bad girl.
-Yeah!
27
00:01:21,214 --> 00:01:23,783
You're a dirty little slut, huh?
Dirty little slut,
28
00:01:23,783 --> 00:01:24,984
-yeah.
-Um, yes.
29
00:01:24,984 --> 00:01:25,952
Say it. Say you're a dirty slut.
30
00:01:25,952 --> 00:01:29,089
-I'm a dirty slut.
-Yeah, you're a dirty slut!
31
00:01:29,856 --> 00:01:33,093
[GROANING]
32
00:01:38,531 --> 00:01:40,900
Oh. Hmm.
33
00:01:41,234 --> 00:01:44,537
Hmm. Hmm.
34
00:01:45,004 --> 00:01:46,473
Okay.
35
00:01:46,906 --> 00:01:48,308
Oh.
36
00:01:48,741 --> 00:01:50,176
[SIGHS]
37
00:01:51,911 --> 00:01:52,479
Mm.
38
00:01:52,479 --> 00:01:54,981
Why do you always call me
a dirty little slut?
39
00:01:54,981 --> 00:01:56,015
Ah.
40
00:01:56,015 --> 00:01:58,418
Come on. You love it.
41
00:01:58,418 --> 00:02:00,120
I like having sex on a bed.
42
00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:02,455
Is this because maybe
you're, uh, you're jealous
43
00:02:02,455 --> 00:02:03,756
that I'm more successful
than you?
44
00:02:03,756 --> 00:02:05,091
-[DOOR KNOCKING]
-MAN: Mr. Brock,
45
00:02:05,091 --> 00:02:06,092
we're ready for you onstage.
46
00:02:06,092 --> 00:02:09,395
Peter, you have been in one
great movie after another.
47
00:02:09,395 --> 00:02:11,231
Walk me through your process.
48
00:02:11,231 --> 00:02:13,299
How do you prepare for this?
49
00:02:13,566 --> 00:02:16,136
I tell you,
I play a lot of action heroes.
50
00:02:16,136 --> 00:02:17,036
Um...
51
00:02:17,036 --> 00:02:18,671
and in those-- in those movies,
52
00:02:18,671 --> 00:02:21,207
I have heavy artillery.
I have guns,
53
00:02:21,207 --> 00:02:22,642
okay?
54
00:02:23,476 --> 00:02:25,612
I have a gun on me right now.
55
00:02:25,812 --> 00:02:27,814
Not physically,
in the physical sense.
56
00:02:27,814 --> 00:02:30,216
I put it on the table earlier.
It's right here.
57
00:02:30,216 --> 00:02:31,317
Imagine it, okay?
58
00:02:31,317 --> 00:02:34,254
-It's an emotional gun for me.
-Right.
59
00:02:34,254 --> 00:02:35,922
This gun's here...
60
00:02:36,156 --> 00:02:36,890
all the time.
61
00:02:36,890 --> 00:02:39,826
Sometimes I put it in my pocket,
sometimes I put it in my...
62
00:02:39,826 --> 00:02:41,594
That's how I prepare.
I'm always ready.
63
00:02:41,594 --> 00:02:44,797
I'm always the action hero.
Bang! Not real.
64
00:02:44,797 --> 00:02:46,332
But real.
65
00:02:46,466 --> 00:02:48,134
-MAN: Uh--
-I'll do it.
66
00:02:48,134 --> 00:02:49,602
Don't do it.
67
00:02:49,602 --> 00:02:50,370
I won't do it.
68
00:02:50,370 --> 00:02:52,138
You've been doing this
for years, and years and years.
69
00:02:52,138 --> 00:02:54,440
Certainly, you've heard some
of the talk on the streets.
70
00:02:54,440 --> 00:02:56,776
People say that Peter is
just a tough guy,
71
00:02:56,776 --> 00:02:59,479
a hard guy to work with.
How do you respond to that?
72
00:02:59,479 --> 00:03:03,783
Yeah, Napoleon died exiled
on an island of-- of leprosy.
73
00:03:03,783 --> 00:03:04,817
That's-- that's true.
74
00:03:04,817 --> 00:03:05,852
-That's history.
-MAN: Yeah.
75
00:03:05,852 --> 00:03:09,055
Jesus died on the cross,
you know?
76
00:03:09,122 --> 00:03:10,690
Um, visionaries die
77
00:03:10,690 --> 00:03:13,693
sometimes quicker
than non-visionaries.
78
00:03:13,693 --> 00:03:14,527
You're a visionary?
79
00:03:14,527 --> 00:03:15,795
PETER: Thank you.
But I'm not saying--
80
00:03:15,795 --> 00:03:17,263
-Oh, you're asking. I think...
-It was a question.
81
00:03:17,263 --> 00:03:19,632
...um, I think that's up
for kinda the press to decide,
82
00:03:19,632 --> 00:03:20,600
and I think that bloggers,
83
00:03:20,600 --> 00:03:22,602
and people
who write physical magazines
84
00:03:22,602 --> 00:03:23,903
have said I was a-- a visionary.
85
00:03:23,903 --> 00:03:25,605
People have--
have tweeted me about that.
86
00:03:25,605 --> 00:03:27,207
You know,
you made Bros Before Hos.
87
00:03:27,207 --> 00:03:28,474
Why don't you make
the female version?
88
00:03:28,474 --> 00:03:30,543
I-- I wrote a great script.
It's called Chicks Before Dicks.
89
00:03:30,543 --> 00:03:32,345
-Did you read it?
-Uh, look, Boo Boo,
90
00:03:32,345 --> 00:03:33,713
you have all the talent.
You really do.
91
00:03:33,713 --> 00:03:34,881
And I'm the one
that discovered you
92
00:03:34,881 --> 00:03:36,249
and gave you
your big break, right?
93
00:03:36,249 --> 00:03:37,283
-Yeah.
-Yeah, I promoted you
94
00:03:37,283 --> 00:03:38,985
-to be my D girl, right?
-I want to be a writer.
95
00:03:38,985 --> 00:03:40,687
I know you want to be a writer,
and in due time.
96
00:03:40,687 --> 00:03:43,356
Really. Your writing is great.
It's fresh and very unique.
97
00:03:43,356 --> 00:03:44,390
But you're bogging yourself down
98
00:03:44,390 --> 00:03:46,192
talking about stupid shit.
You know what? You--
99
00:03:46,192 --> 00:03:48,394
Nobody wants to hear about
women's stories, all right?
100
00:03:48,394 --> 00:03:50,330
If you want to make a film,
you got to talk about a man.
101
00:03:50,330 --> 00:03:51,898
You gotta write about a man.
That's what you have to do.
102
00:03:51,898 --> 00:03:53,833
Well, can you read my script?
It's called The Year of My Yoni.
103
00:03:53,833 --> 00:03:55,602
It's about a woman
who goes on a spiritual quest
104
00:03:55,602 --> 00:03:57,570
to find happiness
and to learn about her yoni.
105
00:03:57,570 --> 00:03:58,771
Yoni? I don't even know
what that is.
106
00:03:58,771 --> 00:04:00,373
Is that, like, a new way
of saying "vagina"?
107
00:04:00,373 --> 00:04:01,774
It sounds like a porno.
I'm not into it.
108
00:04:01,774 --> 00:04:04,811
Look, a guy
bashing another guy's skull in
109
00:04:04,811 --> 00:04:07,614
with a baseball bat,
that's what sells.
110
00:04:09,015 --> 00:04:11,484
Well, I could change the title
to The Ultra-Violent Yoni.
111
00:04:11,484 --> 00:04:13,786
You know, that's a good start.
You could put more violence
112
00:04:13,786 --> 00:04:14,988
in your script,
that'd definitely get
113
00:04:14,988 --> 00:04:16,322
a better chance
of getting it made. Um,
114
00:04:16,322 --> 00:04:18,124
on my end, I'm gonna put
more female characters
115
00:04:18,124 --> 00:04:19,726
-in my next script.
-Really?
116
00:04:19,726 --> 00:04:22,028
Yeah, uh,
it's called Kill the Sluts.
117
00:04:22,028 --> 00:04:23,162
Uh, I'm gonna pick a title
118
00:04:23,162 --> 00:04:24,330
that's more PC
a little bit later.
119
00:04:24,330 --> 00:04:26,366
That's a working title.
But basically, uh,
120
00:04:26,366 --> 00:04:28,968
the movie's about this crazy
psychopathic killer
121
00:04:28,968 --> 00:04:29,969
that goes on a killing rampage
122
00:04:29,969 --> 00:04:31,104
and kills
all these teenage sluts.
123
00:04:31,104 --> 00:04:33,039
But the only person
that he can't kill
124
00:04:33,039 --> 00:04:34,507
is an 18-year-old virgin.
125
00:04:34,507 --> 00:04:37,076
Don't you think that'll send
out a weird message to women
126
00:04:37,076 --> 00:04:38,811
and teenage girls about sex?
And those women
127
00:04:38,811 --> 00:04:40,446
might grow up
and have a lot of issues.
128
00:04:40,446 --> 00:04:41,981
I'm not saying
I'm against women's rights.
129
00:04:41,981 --> 00:04:43,716
I'm just saying that
there's no market
130
00:04:43,716 --> 00:04:45,084
for their films.
131
00:04:45,084 --> 00:04:49,389
[MUSIC PLAYING]
132
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[SIGHS]
133
00:05:40,640 --> 00:05:43,543
[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]
134
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-[LAUGHS]
-WOMAN: Hello!
135
00:06:00,093 --> 00:06:01,127
[GASPS]
136
00:06:01,127 --> 00:06:02,962
-Welcome!
-Welcome, goddess!
137
00:06:02,962 --> 00:06:03,963
Is this your first time?
138
00:06:03,963 --> 00:06:06,265
-I guess so.
-Are you ready
139
00:06:06,265 --> 00:06:08,134
to uncover your deepest desires
140
00:06:08,134 --> 00:06:11,504
and join
the pleasure revolution?
141
00:06:11,504 --> 00:06:13,873
-HONEY: I don't know.
-That's good enough for now.
142
00:06:13,873 --> 00:06:15,641
You are in exactly
the right place.
143
00:06:15,641 --> 00:06:18,544
-ROXY: Yes! Welcome!
-HONEY: Oh.
144
00:06:19,979 --> 00:06:23,082
Fear! So what?
145
00:06:23,082 --> 00:06:26,953
Failure! So what?
146
00:06:26,953 --> 00:06:29,555
WOMAN: My pussy is strong!
147
00:06:29,822 --> 00:06:32,291
My pussy is strong!
148
00:06:32,291 --> 00:06:34,460
My pussy is a genius!
149
00:06:34,460 --> 00:06:37,330
ALL: My pussy is a genius!
150
00:06:37,330 --> 00:06:41,267
We must listen to our pussies.
151
00:06:41,267 --> 00:06:45,772
ALL: We must listen
to our pussies.
152
00:06:45,972 --> 00:06:48,975
[BREATHING HEAVILY]
153
00:06:48,975 --> 00:06:50,810
Ladies, I would now like
to introduce you
154
00:06:50,810 --> 00:06:53,112
to a dear friend of mine,
my mentor,
155
00:06:53,112 --> 00:06:58,818
-Dr. Christiane Northrup!
-[CHEERING]
156
00:07:00,887 --> 00:07:02,989
-What a pleasure.
-Thank you.
157
00:07:02,989 --> 00:07:05,091
Thank you. Thank you.
158
00:07:05,091 --> 00:07:06,526
All right...
159
00:07:06,526 --> 00:07:07,827
I have something...
160
00:07:07,827 --> 00:07:11,264
really magical to tell you.
161
00:07:12,131 --> 00:07:15,067
I love my breasts.
162
00:07:15,201 --> 00:07:16,369
Say it with me.
163
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ALL: I love my breasts.
164
00:07:20,306 --> 00:07:21,674
I love your breasts, too, Chris.
165
00:07:21,674 --> 00:07:25,711
-And I love yours. Thank you.
-Oh, thank you.
166
00:07:25,711 --> 00:07:26,846
Now it is time to honor
167
00:07:26,846 --> 00:07:28,548
the breasts of the women
in the room.
168
00:07:28,548 --> 00:07:31,784
I would like you to turn
to the person next to you,
169
00:07:31,784 --> 00:07:34,387
and look at her breasts
and say,
170
00:07:34,387 --> 00:07:39,492
"Your bodacious ta-tas honor
me and they honor you."
171
00:07:39,492 --> 00:07:41,561
Find-- everybody find
a partner, please.
172
00:07:41,561 --> 00:07:43,963
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
173
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Excuse me, could you--
could you be my partner?
174
00:07:46,365 --> 00:07:47,633
-WOMAN: Yes, sure.
-Okay.
175
00:07:47,633 --> 00:07:48,768
Hi! I don't have a partner.
176
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Is it possible we could do
a three-way?
177
00:07:50,903 --> 00:07:51,871
I've never done a three-way.
178
00:07:51,871 --> 00:07:54,774
This is my third time
taking the class.
179
00:07:54,874 --> 00:07:56,642
First time...
180
00:07:56,642 --> 00:07:58,044
I liked my boobs.
181
00:07:58,044 --> 00:08:01,180
Second time, I loved my boobs.
182
00:08:01,180 --> 00:08:01,948
Now...
183
00:08:01,948 --> 00:08:05,284
[WHISPERING] I really, really
love my boobs.
184
00:08:05,384 --> 00:08:06,486
-Mm!
-Wow.
185
00:08:06,486 --> 00:08:09,856
Yeah. This is a powerful
exercise to release the shame
186
00:08:09,856 --> 00:08:12,625
that we carry
in our sexual organs.
187
00:08:12,625 --> 00:08:13,993
Okay! [SIGHS]
188
00:08:13,993 --> 00:08:18,531
Your bodacious ta-tas honor me
and they honor you.
189
00:08:19,265 --> 00:08:23,102
Your bodacious ta-tas honor me
and they honor you.
190
00:08:23,803 --> 00:08:24,403
Okay!
191
00:08:24,403 --> 00:08:27,940
Your bodacious ta-tas honor me
and they honor you.
192
00:08:27,940 --> 00:08:30,943
Wow! This is my first
lesbian experience.
193
00:08:30,943 --> 00:08:34,046
I didn't know I had it in me.
[LAUGHS]
194
00:08:34,447 --> 00:08:35,114
Okay. I--
195
00:08:35,114 --> 00:08:36,949
are you Eva St. Claire
the designer?
196
00:08:36,949 --> 00:08:38,284
-Yes.
-Wow, I'm--
197
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Why are you in this class?
You seem so together.
198
00:08:42,488 --> 00:08:43,990
Believe me...
199
00:08:43,990 --> 00:08:44,891
I have issues.
200
00:08:44,891 --> 00:08:46,492
WOMAN: That is now the end
of the class
201
00:08:46,492 --> 00:08:48,427
for the Divine
Feminine Workshop.
202
00:08:48,427 --> 00:08:50,463
We will be meeting next week
203
00:08:50,463 --> 00:08:51,130
to worship
204
00:08:51,130 --> 00:08:54,300
-and decorate our pussies.
-[GASPS]
205
00:08:54,300 --> 00:08:56,035
[CHEERING]
206
00:08:56,035 --> 00:08:57,737
WOMAN: Thank you.
207
00:08:59,772 --> 00:09:04,844
[ALL CHANTING] Pussy! Pussy!
Pussy! Pussy!
208
00:09:04,844 --> 00:09:06,245
This class changed my life.
209
00:09:06,245 --> 00:09:08,548
This class,
my color-therapy workshops,
210
00:09:08,548 --> 00:09:11,817
and my past-life
regression conferences.
211
00:09:12,285 --> 00:09:13,986
-What's color therapy?
-Oh!
212
00:09:13,986 --> 00:09:16,756
It's about how certain colors
make you feel.
213
00:09:17,356 --> 00:09:19,158
That sounds helpful.
214
00:09:19,158 --> 00:09:19,725
Oh!
215
00:09:19,725 --> 00:09:21,861
Do you guys want to come
to the place where I work?
216
00:09:21,861 --> 00:09:24,964
I cast magical spells to make
your dreams come true.
217
00:09:24,964 --> 00:09:26,065
I'm a hope-ologist.
218
00:09:26,065 --> 00:09:28,701
-What's a hope-ologist?
-I just made that word up.
219
00:09:28,701 --> 00:09:29,502
Isn't it awesome?
220
00:09:29,502 --> 00:09:33,472
I believe in the religion
of hope, or hope-ology.
221
00:09:33,472 --> 00:09:34,707
I just made that up, too!
222
00:09:34,707 --> 00:09:37,443
I just spent an hour
singing about my pussy,
223
00:09:37,443 --> 00:09:38,644
so why the hell not?
224
00:09:38,644 --> 00:09:40,313
Yeah, I mean, it's either that
or going home
225
00:09:40,313 --> 00:09:41,781
to think about how much
I hate myself,
226
00:09:41,781 --> 00:09:43,883
-so let's do it.
-Let's do it!
227
00:09:43,883 --> 00:09:47,720
♪ Sha-ba-lum ah-ooh
Sha-ba-lum ♪
228
00:09:47,720 --> 00:09:51,591
♪ Ah-ooh sha-ba-lum
Ah-ooh ♪
229
00:09:51,591 --> 00:09:53,359
This place is really cool.
230
00:09:53,359 --> 00:09:54,760
CANDY: Okay.
231
00:09:55,995 --> 00:09:56,862
So...
232
00:09:56,862 --> 00:09:58,764
what do you want to wish for?
233
00:09:58,764 --> 00:10:00,733
-How does it work?
-Oh...
234
00:10:00,733 --> 00:10:03,502
I carve these candles
and cast spells on them.
235
00:10:03,502 --> 00:10:05,271
I don't know
if it's positive intention
236
00:10:05,271 --> 00:10:07,907
or creative visualization
or actual magic,
237
00:10:07,907 --> 00:10:10,977
but these spells work
for a lot of people.
238
00:10:10,977 --> 00:10:14,113
Some of my regulars
call me The Witch.
239
00:10:14,547 --> 00:10:16,515
-What kind of spells?
-Oh! All kinds.
240
00:10:16,515 --> 00:10:19,685
Some for serious stuff, like
for love, or work and stuff,
241
00:10:19,685 --> 00:10:22,922
but some fun ones, too, like,
"I want my own unicorn."
242
00:10:22,922 --> 00:10:24,123
They aren't magical.
243
00:10:24,123 --> 00:10:26,125
They're overpriced candles
for rich idiots
244
00:10:26,125 --> 00:10:27,893
who got nothing better to do.
245
00:10:27,893 --> 00:10:28,861
Your paycheck's on my desk.
246
00:10:28,861 --> 00:10:30,262
Can you take out the trash
while you're at it?
247
00:10:30,262 --> 00:10:31,831
I don't want
the rats getting in there.
248
00:10:31,831 --> 00:10:33,199
Sorry, Mr. J.
249
00:10:33,199 --> 00:10:35,568
Did Mr. Fun Time
just call us idiots?
250
00:10:35,568 --> 00:10:37,470
What an asshole.
I think some people
251
00:10:37,470 --> 00:10:39,372
just don't have
enough imagination.
252
00:10:39,372 --> 00:10:41,374
Honey,
I think you should go first.
253
00:10:41,374 --> 00:10:43,309
[SIGHS] Okay. Um, hmm.
254
00:10:43,309 --> 00:10:45,478
Well, I want to have hot sex
with someone
255
00:10:45,478 --> 00:10:47,013
who's really nice to me. [SIGHS]
256
00:10:47,013 --> 00:10:51,317
Hot sex. Yes. Give it to me!
I want that, too.
257
00:10:51,317 --> 00:10:55,354
I want to not fall asleep
during sex.
258
00:10:55,354 --> 00:10:57,156
I want to be awake.
259
00:10:57,990 --> 00:10:59,258
I want to be...
260
00:10:59,258 --> 00:11:01,127
an active part of it.
261
00:11:01,127 --> 00:11:04,196
-Okay, I want in. I want in!
-Okay.
262
00:11:04,263 --> 00:11:05,464
Um...
263
00:11:05,464 --> 00:11:08,034
I'm gonna use the red candle
264
00:11:08,034 --> 00:11:09,635
for passion.
265
00:11:09,802 --> 00:11:10,636
So...
266
00:11:10,636 --> 00:11:12,371
you hold the candle
and you think
267
00:11:12,371 --> 00:11:15,107
about what you want
to release from your life,
268
00:11:15,107 --> 00:11:18,177
and then
think about what you want.
269
00:11:18,310 --> 00:11:20,946
Picture the hot sex.
270
00:11:25,151 --> 00:11:26,686
Okay.
271
00:11:26,752 --> 00:11:27,520
All right.
272
00:11:27,520 --> 00:11:29,855
I want to have
the hottest sex I've ever had
273
00:11:29,855 --> 00:11:32,825
with someone
who's really nice to me.
274
00:11:34,226 --> 00:11:36,062
And so mote it be.
275
00:11:36,195 --> 00:11:36,762
"Mote"?
276
00:11:36,762 --> 00:11:39,932
It's witch talk
for "and so shall it be."
277
00:11:40,099 --> 00:11:41,467
Witch talk.
278
00:11:41,467 --> 00:11:43,069
I like it.
279
00:11:43,369 --> 00:11:43,969
Okay.
280
00:11:43,969 --> 00:11:47,373
You guys, I really just want
my ex-husband back.
281
00:11:47,373 --> 00:11:49,875
[SIGHS] I don't need hot sex.
282
00:11:49,875 --> 00:11:50,576
I mean, like...
283
00:11:50,576 --> 00:11:53,979
room-temperature-warm sex
would be nice
284
00:11:53,979 --> 00:11:56,215
for me. Here we go.
285
00:11:56,415 --> 00:11:58,718
-[SIGHS]
-And so mote it be.
286
00:11:58,718 --> 00:12:00,453
And so mote it be.
287
00:12:01,187 --> 00:12:02,221
Hmm.
288
00:12:02,221 --> 00:12:04,557
I want hot sex with Daniel.
289
00:12:04,657 --> 00:12:06,759
-So mote it be.
-So mote it be.
290
00:12:12,565 --> 00:12:13,332
[SIGHS]
291
00:12:13,332 --> 00:12:16,836
Okay, I don't know
if all of this is BS,
292
00:12:16,836 --> 00:12:18,370
but I actually feel better.
293
00:12:18,370 --> 00:12:21,240
Oh, my God, I'm invited
to a fun party tonight!
294
00:12:21,240 --> 00:12:22,908
Do you guys want to go with me?
295
00:12:22,908 --> 00:12:24,143
-Yeah!
-CANDY: Yeah!
296
00:12:24,143 --> 00:12:27,279
♪ I got the light ♪
297
00:12:27,913 --> 00:12:30,883
♪ I got the light ♪
298
00:12:31,751 --> 00:12:34,420
♪ I got the light ♪
299
00:12:35,554 --> 00:12:38,357
♪ I got the light ♪
300
00:12:39,158 --> 00:12:42,328
♪ I got the light ♪
301
00:12:42,762 --> 00:12:43,562
[CHEERING]
302
00:12:43,562 --> 00:12:44,830
♪ I got the light ♪
303
00:12:44,830 --> 00:12:47,099
-CANDY: Oh, my God.
-Wait for it.
304
00:12:47,099 --> 00:12:48,434
♪ I got the light ♪
305
00:12:48,434 --> 00:12:50,436
Oh, yeah! Here we go.
306
00:12:50,436 --> 00:12:53,205
[GASPS] Ah!
307
00:12:53,205 --> 00:12:57,076
Oh, my God! Amazing!
308
00:12:57,877 --> 00:12:58,778
Hi!
309
00:12:58,778 --> 00:13:01,147
♪ I got the light ♪
310
00:13:01,147 --> 00:13:02,815
[GIGGLING]
311
00:13:06,418 --> 00:13:09,121
-[CHEERING]
-[EVA SCREAMS]
312
00:13:09,221 --> 00:13:10,322
EVA: Oh, my God.
313
00:13:10,322 --> 00:13:12,892
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
314
00:13:13,092 --> 00:13:14,760
[HONEY CHEERING]
315
00:13:17,863 --> 00:13:21,300
♪ I got the light ♪
316
00:13:21,801 --> 00:13:33,179
♪ I got the light ♪
317
00:13:36,515 --> 00:13:39,084
-Hey!
-Ah!
318
00:13:39,285 --> 00:13:41,420
-EVA: Hi!
-It's so good to see you, babe.
319
00:13:41,420 --> 00:13:42,555
Good to see you, too.
320
00:13:42,555 --> 00:13:44,623
And who is your gorgeous friend?
321
00:13:44,623 --> 00:13:45,357
EVA: Oh, uh...
322
00:13:45,357 --> 00:13:47,760
Honey, this is Freedom.
He's a great artist.
323
00:13:47,760 --> 00:13:49,829
He does
these cool light installations.
324
00:13:49,829 --> 00:13:52,464
-HONEY: Nice to meet you.
-Nice to meet you.
325
00:13:52,464 --> 00:13:53,966
[CHUCKLING]
326
00:13:53,966 --> 00:13:56,268
I would really love to show you
my art installations.
327
00:13:56,268 --> 00:13:57,603
I would love
to see your art installations.
328
00:13:57,603 --> 00:13:59,972
Yeah, I'd really love to dance
with you right now.
329
00:13:59,972 --> 00:14:01,574
-Okay!
-Yeah.
330
00:14:01,574 --> 00:14:05,077
[MUSIC PLAYING]
331
00:14:07,046 --> 00:14:10,149
♪ I got the light ♪
332
00:14:10,482 --> 00:14:13,886
♪ I got the light ♪
333
00:14:14,753 --> 00:14:17,122
♪ I got the light ♪
334
00:14:17,957 --> 00:14:20,993
♪ Oh I got the light ♪
335
00:14:21,560 --> 00:14:24,096
-Want to get something to eat?
-[SIGHS]
336
00:14:24,096 --> 00:14:27,299
I-- I can't, 'cause I have
to get up early tomorrow,
337
00:14:27,299 --> 00:14:29,568
and I have a boyfriend.
338
00:14:30,336 --> 00:14:32,805
[SPEAKING SPANISH]
339
00:14:32,972 --> 00:14:34,306
What's that?
340
00:14:34,306 --> 00:14:35,174
"No one...
341
00:14:35,174 --> 00:14:36,308
can take away the dance."
342
00:14:36,308 --> 00:14:38,544
-[CHUCKLES]
-It's a Spanish saying.
343
00:14:38,544 --> 00:14:39,578
No matter what happens,
344
00:14:39,578 --> 00:14:42,314
we'll always have
this wonderful night...
345
00:14:42,982 --> 00:14:44,483
and our dance.
346
00:14:44,483 --> 00:14:46,018
HONEY: Oh.
347
00:14:46,352 --> 00:14:48,888
Thanks for your jacket.
[CHUCKLES]
348
00:14:49,255 --> 00:14:50,856
That was fun.
349
00:14:50,990 --> 00:14:52,191
♪ I got the light ♪
350
00:14:52,191 --> 00:14:55,861
♪ I got the light ♪
♪ I got the light ♪
351
00:14:55,861 --> 00:14:58,497
-The dance lives forever.
-[FREEDOM CHUCKLES]
352
00:14:58,497 --> 00:15:00,532
FREEDOM: Dance lives forever!
353
00:15:00,532 --> 00:15:03,702
♪ I got the light ♪
354
00:15:03,702 --> 00:15:07,539
-♪ I got the light ♪
-♪ I got the light ♪
355
00:15:07,539 --> 00:15:11,844
-♪ I got the light ♪
-♪ All of the way ♪
356
00:15:11,844 --> 00:15:14,613
♪ I got the light ♪
357
00:15:15,114 --> 00:15:16,782
This is what I want to happen.
I want the slut
358
00:15:16,782 --> 00:15:18,784
to have an orgasm,
and when she has an orgasm
359
00:15:18,784 --> 00:15:20,185
I want the killer to come up
behind her
360
00:15:20,185 --> 00:15:21,787
and just stab her
in the ass, okay?
361
00:15:21,787 --> 00:15:23,822
I want there to be
a lot of blood in this scene.
362
00:15:23,822 --> 00:15:25,324
Like, almost too much,
where you're like...
363
00:15:25,324 --> 00:15:29,194
But--but a lot, but, like--
but, like, almost too much.
364
00:15:29,194 --> 00:15:31,130
I also want there
to be very good dialogue,
365
00:15:31,130 --> 00:15:32,731
okay?
And that's where you come in.
366
00:15:32,731 --> 00:15:34,967
So I want the character to say
something cool, like,
367
00:15:34,967 --> 00:15:36,435
"Fuck you, bitch! Fuck you!"
368
00:15:36,435 --> 00:15:38,170
"Fuck you, bitch. Fuck you."
Got it.
369
00:15:38,170 --> 00:15:40,639
Do whatever you want to do,
but that.
370
00:15:41,774 --> 00:15:44,643
I'm sick of watching women
get stabbed in movies. [SIGHS]
371
00:15:44,643 --> 00:15:48,814
I think it's a great idea,
Peter. I love all your ideas.
372
00:15:50,182 --> 00:15:51,150
So much.
373
00:15:51,150 --> 00:15:53,619
Excuse me, but why does
the woman who enjoys sex
374
00:15:53,619 --> 00:15:55,187
always have to die
in horror films?
375
00:15:55,187 --> 00:15:57,790
Maybe she could fight back.
376
00:15:58,557 --> 00:16:01,527
We could work in some more
nudity that way.
377
00:16:01,527 --> 00:16:02,661
What if the slut fights
the killer
378
00:16:02,661 --> 00:16:05,764
and every orgasm
she has makes her stronger.
379
00:16:05,764 --> 00:16:06,832
[CHUCKLES] That's funny.
380
00:16:06,832 --> 00:16:09,101
I think
we should at least try it.
381
00:16:09,101 --> 00:16:11,003
Well, you know what, John?
I would try that,
382
00:16:11,003 --> 00:16:12,004
but I-- I can't-- I actually--
383
00:16:12,004 --> 00:16:13,939
I think that that's probably
the worst fucking idea
384
00:16:13,939 --> 00:16:15,274
I've ever heard
in my entire life,
385
00:16:15,274 --> 00:16:16,775
so I probably can't do that one.
386
00:16:16,775 --> 00:16:18,677
I like sluts.
Why do they all have to die?
387
00:16:18,677 --> 00:16:21,113
I mean, nobody kills male sluts
in movies.
388
00:16:21,113 --> 00:16:22,915
I like sluts, too.
389
00:16:22,915 --> 00:16:24,683
Who doesn't like sluts?
390
00:16:24,683 --> 00:16:25,818
Maybe one should live.
391
00:16:25,818 --> 00:16:27,920
Well... Linda, the thing is,
you already approved
392
00:16:27,920 --> 00:16:29,888
-the draft that I wrote, so--
-Who are you?
393
00:16:29,888 --> 00:16:31,690
I'm a development person.
394
00:16:31,690 --> 00:16:34,827
Well, yeah, she was
my old assistant until recently
395
00:16:34,827 --> 00:16:35,861
I promoted her into development
396
00:16:35,861 --> 00:16:38,497
before I realized
what an angry feminist she is.
397
00:16:38,497 --> 00:16:41,900
She's also a writer.
Actually, a really good writer.
398
00:16:41,900 --> 00:16:43,068
Well, we all write.
399
00:16:43,068 --> 00:16:43,936
I want to be a writer.
400
00:16:43,936 --> 00:16:46,205
I'm--
I'm the young assistant.
401
00:16:46,472 --> 00:16:47,606
-Peter's.
-All right,
402
00:16:47,606 --> 00:16:49,174
well, you know,
that's confusing,
403
00:16:49,174 --> 00:16:52,244
but I like this idea.
I think we should explore it.
404
00:16:52,244 --> 00:16:55,581
-Yeah, Linda, but I think--
-Peter, I gave you final cut.
405
00:16:55,581 --> 00:17:00,152
No studio's gonna
offer you that. The slut lives.
406
00:17:00,152 --> 00:17:01,020
Old assistant person,
407
00:17:01,020 --> 00:17:04,456
I would like you and John
to work on the next draft.
408
00:17:04,456 --> 00:17:06,558
Get it to me when you're done.
409
00:17:07,693 --> 00:17:09,795
-[HONEY SIGHS]
-PETER: Linda, if I could just--
410
00:17:09,795 --> 00:17:12,331
LINDA: Yeah, I have
an appointment in St. Barts
411
00:17:12,331 --> 00:17:14,099
later today.
412
00:17:15,100 --> 00:17:16,835
[PHONE RINGING]
413
00:17:16,902 --> 00:17:20,005
Excuse me,
but what the hell was that?
414
00:17:20,005 --> 00:17:21,640
Well, when we started
working together,
415
00:17:21,640 --> 00:17:23,542
you said you liked my ideas.
416
00:17:23,542 --> 00:17:24,676
It embarrasses me to think
417
00:17:24,676 --> 00:17:27,312
about the idiotic films
that you want to make.
418
00:17:27,312 --> 00:17:28,280
Thought it was a good idea.
419
00:17:28,280 --> 00:17:30,816
Better than a guy
stabbing a girl in the ass.
420
00:17:30,816 --> 00:17:31,517
Sex and violence
421
00:17:31,517 --> 00:17:34,119
is a proven formula
that makes a profit.
422
00:17:34,119 --> 00:17:35,888
Well, what about...
423
00:17:35,888 --> 00:17:37,623
sex and happiness?
424
00:17:37,623 --> 00:17:39,425
You're embarrassing yourself!
425
00:17:39,425 --> 00:17:41,860
The--
What are you talking about?
426
00:17:42,294 --> 00:17:44,263
I want to break up.
427
00:17:45,497 --> 00:17:47,066
PETER: What? Really?
428
00:17:47,066 --> 00:17:49,935
You want to break up with--
with me?
429
00:17:50,002 --> 00:17:51,403
Do you have any idea
430
00:17:51,403 --> 00:17:54,373
how many girls want to sleep
with me right now,
431
00:17:54,373 --> 00:17:56,141
huh? So many.
432
00:17:56,208 --> 00:17:57,476
I'm Peter Brock, okay?
433
00:17:57,476 --> 00:17:59,945
Well, why don't you go have sex
with them?
434
00:18:00,412 --> 00:18:02,614
Yeah, maybe I--
maybe I will, okay?
435
00:18:02,614 --> 00:18:05,317
But, no, you know what?
Actually...
436
00:18:05,317 --> 00:18:06,752
rewind. I break up with you.
437
00:18:06,752 --> 00:18:09,088
Before what you said,
I break up with you
438
00:18:09,088 --> 00:18:10,889
before you said you break up
with me.
439
00:18:10,889 --> 00:18:12,591
It was my idea.
440
00:18:13,358 --> 00:18:14,793
Great idea.
441
00:18:14,793 --> 00:18:16,795
I'm Peter Brock. Look at this.
442
00:18:16,795 --> 00:18:19,865
Look at all--
There's three posters here.
443
00:18:19,865 --> 00:18:20,532
More-- I--
444
00:18:20,532 --> 00:18:23,469
There's some behind the door
I didn't even hang up.
445
00:18:23,769 --> 00:18:26,472
You are my honey bunny.
Come here.
446
00:18:27,005 --> 00:18:29,041
You are my honey bunny.
447
00:18:30,442 --> 00:18:31,877
Oh...
448
00:18:34,980 --> 00:18:36,615
Get me a coffee.
449
00:18:36,682 --> 00:18:38,817
[DOGS BARKING]
450
00:18:40,686 --> 00:18:43,255
[JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING]
451
00:18:43,255 --> 00:18:46,091
Yeah,
but he sounds like a wanker.
452
00:18:46,091 --> 00:18:46,925
Why work for him?
453
00:18:46,925 --> 00:18:48,827
Well, it's hard to find work
in the movie business.
454
00:18:48,827 --> 00:18:51,363
-It's a man's world. [SIGHS]
-Yeah,
455
00:18:51,363 --> 00:18:53,799
well, yeah. Huh?
456
00:18:53,799 --> 00:18:55,167
Mm!
457
00:18:55,534 --> 00:18:57,603
Do you like eating
with your hands?
458
00:18:57,603 --> 00:18:59,004
Um, I don't know.
459
00:18:59,004 --> 00:19:02,608
Mm. You know, you can
just feel the food, you know?
460
00:19:02,608 --> 00:19:04,543
Sometimes I just want to eat
like a dog.
461
00:19:04,543 --> 00:19:08,180
Yeah, I just want to put
my face in there, yeah?
462
00:19:09,047 --> 00:19:10,482
Huh?
463
00:19:10,916 --> 00:19:13,285
[GROANS] Mm-mm!
464
00:19:13,785 --> 00:19:15,387
[CHUCKLES]
465
00:19:15,387 --> 00:19:16,121
Come on, try it.
466
00:19:16,121 --> 00:19:17,322
Oh, it's so good. Give it a go.
467
00:19:17,322 --> 00:19:19,124
-Come on.
-Oh, no, it's okay.
468
00:19:19,124 --> 00:19:21,126
Come on. You've got to try this.
469
00:19:21,793 --> 00:19:23,295
Come on.
470
00:19:25,097 --> 00:19:27,399
-Mm. Yum.
-Yeah? Right?
471
00:19:27,399 --> 00:19:28,934
-Delicious. [CHUCKLES]
-Yeah.
472
00:19:28,934 --> 00:19:30,869
It's straight from the plate
to your face.
473
00:19:30,869 --> 00:19:32,304
Wow,
it's so much better this way.
474
00:19:32,304 --> 00:19:34,907
It is, absolutely.
I'm gonna join you down here.
475
00:19:34,907 --> 00:19:37,209
Mm! Oh, it's so good! Mm!
476
00:19:37,209 --> 00:19:38,911
CANDY: [PANTING] I love you.
477
00:19:38,911 --> 00:19:40,245
MAN: I love you.
478
00:19:40,245 --> 00:19:42,447
[PANTING]
479
00:19:42,648 --> 00:19:44,316
You know I don't...
480
00:19:44,616 --> 00:19:45,951
want a relationship, right?
481
00:19:45,951 --> 00:19:47,286
You knew that, though, right?
[CHUCKLES]
482
00:19:47,286 --> 00:19:48,987
-That's just... That's just...
-[LAUGHS] Wait.
483
00:19:48,987 --> 00:19:52,124
Well, aren't we already
actually having a relationship?
484
00:19:52,124 --> 00:19:53,725
-I mean...
-I mean, if you wanna--
485
00:19:53,725 --> 00:19:54,927
...we've been dating
for two years
486
00:19:54,927 --> 00:19:56,128
and you just told me
you loved me.
487
00:19:56,128 --> 00:20:00,766
Oh, Yeah, well, you know, I--
Yeah, I love you, you know, I--
488
00:20:00,766 --> 00:20:04,903
I love you as a sister,
you know, as a friend, and...
489
00:20:04,903 --> 00:20:07,539
as-- as a sexual partner, uh...
490
00:20:07,539 --> 00:20:10,175
as-- as a fellow human being,
you know?
491
00:20:10,175 --> 00:20:12,978
But I think we should just find
a new and better way to--
492
00:20:12,978 --> 00:20:14,746
to do relationships.
493
00:20:14,746 --> 00:20:17,482
-You know?
-Yeah. [CHUCKLES]
494
00:20:17,482 --> 00:20:18,550
[CHUCKLES]
495
00:20:18,550 --> 00:20:20,252
-Right?
-Okay.
496
00:20:20,252 --> 00:20:23,355
Oh. Shit. Babe, I got to--
I got to go, actually,
497
00:20:23,355 --> 00:20:27,392
'cause I have a... I just--
I just got a crazy week.
498
00:20:27,392 --> 00:20:28,727
Oh, can I also, uh--
499
00:20:28,727 --> 00:20:33,498
Babe, can I-- can I leave that,
uh, my laundry here and, uh...
500
00:20:33,565 --> 00:20:35,367
get it on Thursday?
501
00:20:35,434 --> 00:20:39,438
You want me to do your laundry
while you date other women?
502
00:20:39,438 --> 00:20:42,074
That's... I mean, that would
be really insensitive
503
00:20:42,074 --> 00:20:44,076
if we were
in some old-fashioned,
504
00:20:44,076 --> 00:20:45,377
you know, closed-minded...
505
00:20:45,377 --> 00:20:47,312
relationship,
but since we're not, you know,
506
00:20:47,312 --> 00:20:49,815
we're-- we're, uh,
we're not confining ourselves
507
00:20:49,815 --> 00:20:51,750
to societal norms,
then I think--
508
00:20:51,750 --> 00:20:54,086
I think it's fine. Yeah.
509
00:20:54,086 --> 00:20:55,754
All right.
510
00:20:55,821 --> 00:20:56,955
Bye.
511
00:20:56,955 --> 00:21:00,125
[MUSIC PLAYING]
512
00:21:04,463 --> 00:21:07,599
Hey. Um, me again. Listen,
513
00:21:07,599 --> 00:21:08,433
I was just gonna say
514
00:21:08,433 --> 00:21:12,137
why don't you just ignore
those previous voicemails, okay?
515
00:21:12,137 --> 00:21:12,938
Because... [SIGHS]
516
00:21:12,938 --> 00:21:15,841
here's-- here's the real truth,
okay?
517
00:21:15,841 --> 00:21:17,509
Let's get honest.
518
00:21:17,609 --> 00:21:19,311
I am great.
519
00:21:19,311 --> 00:21:20,912
I'm great. I'm so great.
520
00:21:20,912 --> 00:21:25,617
And I'm super-happy for you
and Chandra.
521
00:21:25,617 --> 00:21:26,885
And here's the thing,
522
00:21:26,885 --> 00:21:29,187
I'm so happy!
I'm so happy and I'm great.
523
00:21:29,187 --> 00:21:32,224
Like, if great were people,
I'd be, like, fucking--
524
00:21:32,224 --> 00:21:33,759
Where is there a lot of people?
India?
525
00:21:33,759 --> 00:21:39,164
Beijing? I'm fucking Beijing.
That's how great I am.
526
00:21:39,564 --> 00:21:41,833
So I saved one of your messages
that you left me,
527
00:21:41,833 --> 00:21:43,068
you know,
right when you were, like,
528
00:21:43,068 --> 00:21:44,803
"Hey, by the way,
I'm fucking a 19-year-old."
529
00:21:44,803 --> 00:21:47,372
It's such a great message.
It's so amazing.
530
00:21:47,372 --> 00:21:50,575
I'm so glad you told me things
on a voicemail.
531
00:21:50,575 --> 00:21:51,576
You are so brave.
532
00:21:51,576 --> 00:21:53,879
And by "brave," I mean, like,
533
00:21:53,879 --> 00:21:54,913
you're a fucking idiot.
534
00:21:54,913 --> 00:21:55,881
I just wanted you to know that.
535
00:21:55,881 --> 00:21:57,883
I saved it,
and I play it for my friends.
536
00:21:57,883 --> 00:21:59,384
And we laugh and laugh.
537
00:21:59,384 --> 00:22:02,120
And then I tell them
about your weird dick.
538
00:22:02,254 --> 00:22:04,756
And I'm fucking naked.
539
00:22:04,756 --> 00:22:05,624
And I have on-- [GROANS]
540
00:22:05,624 --> 00:22:08,226
I have on those...
high-heel, like,
541
00:22:08,226 --> 00:22:10,295
fuck-me pumps that you love.
542
00:22:10,295 --> 00:22:12,331
Oh, yeah, I'm naked.
543
00:22:12,331 --> 00:22:13,598
Mm. You know what else?
544
00:22:13,598 --> 00:22:16,735
Remember that time you told me
to squeeze your dick really hard
545
00:22:16,735 --> 00:22:18,170
at the base of it?
546
00:22:18,170 --> 00:22:20,305
I'm fucking doing that...
547
00:22:20,305 --> 00:22:23,475
and you don't--
Yeah, and it's awesome.
548
00:22:25,010 --> 00:22:27,479
So, baby, call me.
549
00:22:30,916 --> 00:22:34,353
'Cause I could suck your cock.
[SOBBING]
550
00:22:34,353 --> 00:22:36,555
I really think
you should come over,
551
00:22:36,555 --> 00:22:38,857
'cause I might do
something bad to myself.
552
00:22:38,857 --> 00:22:42,427
Oh, my God, I might do
something so bad, and then...
553
00:22:42,427 --> 00:22:43,595
I mean, I don't know
what I would do,
554
00:22:43,595 --> 00:22:46,031
but it would be bad,
and then you would feel guilty,
555
00:22:46,031 --> 00:22:48,333
like, for the rest of your life.
556
00:22:48,333 --> 00:22:49,534
So...
557
00:22:49,534 --> 00:22:53,572
I can't wait to hear from you.
Okay.
558
00:22:53,739 --> 00:22:55,340
Bye!
559
00:22:55,941 --> 00:22:59,211
[MUSIC PLAYING]
560
00:23:03,749 --> 00:23:05,283
Wow.
561
00:23:05,350 --> 00:23:07,285
This is amazing.
562
00:23:10,155 --> 00:23:12,691
[MUSIC PLAYING]
563
00:23:17,996 --> 00:23:21,133
-Is this all your art?
-Oh, yeah.
564
00:23:21,566 --> 00:23:22,801
See...
565
00:23:22,801 --> 00:23:26,304
our society is sick, yeah?
566
00:23:26,371 --> 00:23:29,408
[SIGHS] It's no wonder
the Earth is dying,
567
00:23:29,408 --> 00:23:33,178
'cause the culture sends
its message, yeah?
568
00:23:33,178 --> 00:23:35,080
Join the rat race. Make money.
569
00:23:35,080 --> 00:23:36,848
Be a winner,
otherwise you're nothing.
570
00:23:36,848 --> 00:23:40,352
It's read Us Weekly.
Drink the Kool-Aid.
571
00:23:40,352 --> 00:23:41,720
Fuck that shit.
572
00:23:41,720 --> 00:23:45,557
I'm my own man. I mean,
sure, got to make money.
573
00:23:45,624 --> 00:23:47,759
But I don't let them own me
574
00:23:47,759 --> 00:23:50,295
by seeking their approval, yeah?
575
00:23:51,062 --> 00:23:53,465
I'm free. [GASPS]
576
00:23:53,865 --> 00:23:56,067
Why I chose the name Freedom.
577
00:23:56,168 --> 00:23:57,869
Okay.
578
00:23:59,704 --> 00:24:01,807
[BREATHING HEAVILY]
579
00:24:03,508 --> 00:24:06,278
I don't go to exercise classes,
you know?
580
00:24:06,912 --> 00:24:08,547
I do my own thing.
581
00:24:08,547 --> 00:24:09,981
[PANTING]
582
00:24:09,981 --> 00:24:11,750
Why follow the man?
583
00:24:11,750 --> 00:24:13,785
I create my own moves
584
00:24:13,785 --> 00:24:17,422
I don't need someone
to give them to me. [CHUCKLES]
585
00:24:17,422 --> 00:24:20,459
Well, yoga exercises
are thousands of years old
586
00:24:20,459 --> 00:24:22,594
for a reason. They really work.
587
00:24:28,567 --> 00:24:31,603
Why don't you let the man
out of you?
588
00:24:33,538 --> 00:24:35,841
Why don't you go your own way...
589
00:24:36,508 --> 00:24:39,344
instead of trying
to please people?
590
00:24:42,781 --> 00:24:46,017
[MUSIC PLAYING]
591
00:24:56,761 --> 00:24:59,331
Are you gonna keep doing
those moves?
592
00:24:59,998 --> 00:25:01,500
Oh, yeah.
593
00:25:15,213 --> 00:25:17,549
-DARREN: Eva?
-[DOOR KNOCKING]
594
00:25:20,719 --> 00:25:22,087
Shit.
595
00:25:22,087 --> 00:25:23,755
Are you in there?
596
00:25:28,159 --> 00:25:29,661
Hi.
597
00:25:30,862 --> 00:25:31,696
Fuck-me pumps, huh?
598
00:25:31,696 --> 00:25:34,165
EVA: Uh, they're upstairs.
You want me to get them?
599
00:25:34,165 --> 00:25:35,600
No. That's okay.
600
00:25:35,600 --> 00:25:37,369
I took them off
'cause they hurt my feet.
601
00:25:37,369 --> 00:25:39,905
-Mm-hmm.
-You put on the sweats.
602
00:25:40,539 --> 00:25:42,874
I was worried, obviously.
603
00:25:42,874 --> 00:25:44,109
So many messages.
604
00:25:44,109 --> 00:25:45,043
You were worried about me?
605
00:25:45,043 --> 00:25:48,513
Well... 14 messages
and some suicide threats.
606
00:25:48,513 --> 00:25:52,751
I never said suicide. I said,
"Maybe something bad."
607
00:25:53,418 --> 00:25:57,255
And that you would die alone.
You're not gonna die alone.
608
00:25:57,622 --> 00:25:59,024
But if you do...
609
00:25:59,024 --> 00:26:01,526
it's because of doing things
like this.
610
00:26:02,294 --> 00:26:04,296
You look really nice.
611
00:26:04,296 --> 00:26:05,830
Thank you. I'm gonna go.
612
00:26:05,830 --> 00:26:08,099
It's Chandra's birthday.
We're doing a thing.
613
00:26:08,099 --> 00:26:10,335
[GASPS] It's her birthday?
614
00:26:10,335 --> 00:26:12,437
Oh, wait,
I have a question for you.
615
00:26:12,437 --> 00:26:15,040
-Mm-hmm.
-Like, where was Chandra...
616
00:26:15,040 --> 00:26:17,776
when I was putting you
through art school?
617
00:26:17,776 --> 00:26:19,144
Oh, my God! That's right!
618
00:26:19,144 --> 00:26:20,245
Here comes the flood.
619
00:26:20,245 --> 00:26:21,279
-Oh, my God!
-Here it is.
620
00:26:21,279 --> 00:26:23,181
-She was in kindergarten. Yay!
-We are doing this.
621
00:26:23,181 --> 00:26:25,650
Well, guess what, Eva,
I could never keep up with you,
622
00:26:25,650 --> 00:26:27,519
'cause all you ever cared about
was money.
623
00:26:27,519 --> 00:26:29,020
You're a fucking liar,
624
00:26:29,020 --> 00:26:30,689
because I don't care
about money.
625
00:26:30,689 --> 00:26:33,592
I put you through art school.
You're just like... What?
626
00:26:33,592 --> 00:26:35,493
What do you even do
for a living?
627
00:26:35,493 --> 00:26:36,461
You drive a douchebag car.
628
00:26:36,461 --> 00:26:38,730
I wanted a much douchier car
than that.
629
00:26:38,730 --> 00:26:40,131
That was the one
we could afford.
630
00:26:40,131 --> 00:26:42,133
I'm sorry.
I shouldn't have said that.
631
00:26:42,133 --> 00:26:44,035
I don't like you right now.
632
00:26:44,035 --> 00:26:45,470
I love you...
633
00:26:45,470 --> 00:26:48,106
somewhat. But right now...
634
00:26:48,373 --> 00:26:50,308
I don't think
you would like you, either,
635
00:26:50,308 --> 00:26:52,277
'cause you're being horrible...
636
00:26:52,344 --> 00:26:53,878
and you look...
637
00:26:54,212 --> 00:26:54,879
horrible.
638
00:26:54,879 --> 00:26:58,416
[SOBBING]
I just wanted to have a baby!
639
00:26:58,650 --> 00:27:00,251
Okay. Come here.
640
00:27:01,086 --> 00:27:03,254
Come here. Come here.
641
00:27:03,254 --> 00:27:04,389
-Hi. Hi.
-Don't, don't, don't.
642
00:27:04,389 --> 00:27:06,858
No, don't make it a thing.
Don't make it a thing.
643
00:27:06,858 --> 00:27:09,260
Oh, my God,
you smell so weird.
644
00:27:09,327 --> 00:27:10,862
-You smell so good.
-No, just don't.
645
00:27:10,862 --> 00:27:14,332
Don't humiliate yourself
anymore than you have, okay?
646
00:27:14,332 --> 00:27:15,200
You smell like...
647
00:27:15,200 --> 00:27:17,836
-I don't know, like, lavender--
-Okay. Just stop. Just stop.
648
00:27:17,836 --> 00:27:19,137
Don't embarrass yourself...
649
00:27:19,137 --> 00:27:21,806
-anymore.
-You don't embarrass yourself,
650
00:27:21,806 --> 00:27:23,508
buddy. You settle down.
651
00:27:23,508 --> 00:27:25,844
-What's happening down there?
-Don't. Don't.
652
00:27:25,844 --> 00:27:27,979
-We're not.
-[SIGHS] Okay.
653
00:27:29,147 --> 00:27:31,883
Brew up some coffee.
Don't. Please.
654
00:27:31,883 --> 00:27:35,120
I care very deeply
about you without loving you.
655
00:27:35,120 --> 00:27:38,089
Throw up, go to sleep,
take a shower.
656
00:27:38,089 --> 00:27:39,791
I already threw up.
657
00:27:41,526 --> 00:27:43,662
[SOBBING] I love you so much.
658
00:27:43,662 --> 00:27:46,131
Bye. Thank you for coming!
659
00:27:46,131 --> 00:27:49,200
[HONEY MOANING]
660
00:27:53,405 --> 00:27:56,541
The only reason a man
and a woman
661
00:27:56,541 --> 00:27:59,310
should have carnal knowledge
of each other...
662
00:27:59,310 --> 00:28:00,979
is to create a child.
663
00:28:00,979 --> 00:28:02,514
[HONEY MOANING]
664
00:28:02,514 --> 00:28:04,315
Any other physical union
665
00:28:04,315 --> 00:28:08,019
between a man and a woman...
666
00:28:08,086 --> 00:28:09,954
is a sin.
667
00:28:10,088 --> 00:28:13,091
[MOANING]
668
00:28:13,091 --> 00:28:15,160
And sins are punishable
669
00:28:15,160 --> 00:28:17,862
by hellfire and damnation.
670
00:28:17,862 --> 00:28:18,730
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
671
00:28:18,730 --> 00:28:22,200
-You will go to hell!
-HONEY: I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
672
00:28:22,200 --> 00:28:24,836
I'm sorry. [MOANING]
673
00:28:25,737 --> 00:28:27,272
You all right?
674
00:28:28,673 --> 00:28:31,910
-Did I just say that out loud?
-Yeah.
675
00:28:33,812 --> 00:28:34,512
It felt so good.
676
00:28:34,512 --> 00:28:37,348
It felt like
I was doing something wrong.
677
00:28:37,415 --> 00:28:38,917
I'm fucked up.
678
00:28:38,917 --> 00:28:40,952
I don't think you're fucked up.
679
00:28:40,952 --> 00:28:43,455
-You don't?
-No.
680
00:28:44,022 --> 00:28:46,091
I think you're divine.
681
00:28:47,325 --> 00:28:49,260
Divinity itself...
682
00:28:49,394 --> 00:28:51,329
in a physical form.
683
00:28:51,730 --> 00:28:54,032
-Really?
-Yeah.
684
00:28:54,032 --> 00:28:56,768
[MUSIC PLAYING]
685
00:29:09,447 --> 00:29:12,350
I thought I knew what sex
and orgasms were before,
686
00:29:12,350 --> 00:29:13,118
but I did not.
687
00:29:13,118 --> 00:29:15,553
I feel like I understand
the meaning of life now,
688
00:29:15,553 --> 00:29:17,288
and the meaning of life
is to have as much sex
689
00:29:17,288 --> 00:29:21,226
as possible with this guy
over and over again.
690
00:29:21,226 --> 00:29:23,061
Oh! Great sex!
691
00:29:23,061 --> 00:29:24,596
Oh,
it makes you do stupid things.
692
00:29:24,596 --> 00:29:26,798
I feel like I tried
to please the guy so much before
693
00:29:26,798 --> 00:29:29,801
that I never, like,
really got off.
694
00:29:30,301 --> 00:29:31,870
Darren would just... [SIGHS]
695
00:29:31,870 --> 00:29:34,939
jam it in there
without a lot of warm-up.
696
00:29:34,939 --> 00:29:36,508
And that was
on the rare occasions
697
00:29:36,508 --> 00:29:38,910
that he could get it up. [SIGHS]
698
00:29:39,177 --> 00:29:39,878
This is your ex?
699
00:29:39,878 --> 00:29:41,412
You know what? People say
they want to hear the truth,
700
00:29:41,412 --> 00:29:44,582
but they don't. They just want
to be, like, "Oh, poor Eva.
701
00:29:44,582 --> 00:29:46,985
Did you hear
Eva's husband cheated on her?"
702
00:29:46,985 --> 00:29:50,288
Here's the truth,
I supported him financially
703
00:29:50,288 --> 00:29:51,289
for 14 years.
704
00:29:51,289 --> 00:29:53,658
That emasculated him.
Oh, poor guy.
705
00:29:53,658 --> 00:29:56,127
So then he got
erectile dysfunction. "Oh, wah"
706
00:29:56,127 --> 00:29:58,296
So then he had to go
fuck a 21-year-old,
707
00:29:58,296 --> 00:30:01,065
so he could feel
like a man again!
708
00:30:01,800 --> 00:30:04,536
He's not worthy of you,
'cause you're great.
709
00:30:04,536 --> 00:30:06,070
Yeah.
710
00:30:06,404 --> 00:30:07,572
Thank you.
711
00:30:07,572 --> 00:30:09,073
I feel like I have
to do everything
712
00:30:09,073 --> 00:30:10,708
the guy says or he'll leave me.
713
00:30:10,708 --> 00:30:13,411
Like, I've been dating this guy
for two years,
714
00:30:13,411 --> 00:30:15,880
pretending the entire time
like I don't know
715
00:30:15,880 --> 00:30:16,714
he's dating other girls.
716
00:30:16,714 --> 00:30:18,917
You need to ask him
for what you want. Just say,
717
00:30:18,917 --> 00:30:20,084
"I only want you to see me."
718
00:30:20,084 --> 00:30:22,387
Or date other men
and flaunt them in front of him.
719
00:30:22,387 --> 00:30:23,688
Yeah, but I only want him.
720
00:30:23,688 --> 00:30:24,789
God, why are we sitting around
721
00:30:24,789 --> 00:30:26,457
talking about how sad
our lives are?
722
00:30:26,457 --> 00:30:27,559
Why do women do that?
723
00:30:27,559 --> 00:30:29,828
You know, you're right.
We should be talking about
724
00:30:29,828 --> 00:30:30,662
how great we are,
725
00:30:30,662 --> 00:30:33,164
and if someone gives us
a compliment, we should say,
726
00:30:33,164 --> 00:30:36,434
-"Thank you. It's true."
-[LAUGHING]
727
00:30:36,434 --> 00:30:38,002
You start.
728
00:30:38,002 --> 00:30:38,603
What?
729
00:30:38,603 --> 00:30:40,505
-And give myself a compliment?
-HONEY: Yeah.
730
00:30:40,505 --> 00:30:42,173
Yeah, just do it.
731
00:30:42,807 --> 00:30:44,776
Okay. Um...
732
00:30:44,776 --> 00:30:47,011
I think I'm more attractive
than I thought
733
00:30:47,011 --> 00:30:49,214
'cause-- All right,
well, there's this guy
734
00:30:49,214 --> 00:30:50,715
at the coffee cart on the beach.
735
00:30:50,715 --> 00:30:52,050
He asks me out all the time.
736
00:30:52,050 --> 00:30:54,986
He's super-attractive,
and he's 28
737
00:30:54,986 --> 00:30:57,188
[SCREAMS] You should go for it.
738
00:30:57,188 --> 00:30:58,723
-No.
-Yeah!
739
00:30:58,723 --> 00:31:02,861
Really? Move over.
There's a new skank in town.
740
00:31:02,861 --> 00:31:04,295
[LAUGHING]
741
00:31:04,295 --> 00:31:05,330
I think I'm gonna tell my man
742
00:31:05,330 --> 00:31:07,665
that I'm not gonna do
his laundry.
743
00:31:07,999 --> 00:31:08,800
So there!
744
00:31:08,800 --> 00:31:11,269
'Cause I am super hot,
and he should feel lucky
745
00:31:11,269 --> 00:31:13,371
to tap that ass.
So he better behave.
746
00:31:13,371 --> 00:31:14,973
Yeah. He should do your laundry.
747
00:31:14,973 --> 00:31:17,909
Yeah, you are so hot.
Like, really hot.
748
00:31:17,909 --> 00:31:19,878
Thank you. It's true.
749
00:31:21,246 --> 00:31:22,647
Okay, your turn.
750
00:31:22,714 --> 00:31:24,182
Okay. [SIGHS]
751
00:31:24,182 --> 00:31:25,483
I'm not a dirty slut.
752
00:31:25,483 --> 00:31:29,120
Having sex with me
is a religious experience.
753
00:31:29,120 --> 00:31:30,455
Yeah, it is.
754
00:31:30,455 --> 00:31:34,459
-I want a new candle.
-Oh, I brought the love candle.
755
00:31:37,395 --> 00:31:38,229
Honey.
756
00:31:38,229 --> 00:31:39,697
-Thank you.
-Eva.
757
00:31:39,697 --> 00:31:41,266
So sweet.
758
00:31:41,266 --> 00:31:42,533
You know,
we talk about pleasing men,
759
00:31:42,533 --> 00:31:45,370
but what about pleasing us?
You know what we should say?
760
00:31:45,370 --> 00:31:47,405
"Get down there and lick it.
761
00:31:47,605 --> 00:31:48,606
Lick it."
762
00:31:48,606 --> 00:31:50,041
-[LAUGHING]
-Lick it.
763
00:31:50,041 --> 00:31:53,378
Darren never licked it.
I think I'm due.
764
00:31:53,478 --> 00:31:54,746
Lick it!
765
00:31:54,746 --> 00:31:56,314
I like it.
766
00:31:56,314 --> 00:31:57,715
Lick it.
767
00:31:58,016 --> 00:32:02,086
[MUSIC PLAYING]
768
00:32:04,789 --> 00:32:06,357
♪ Sha-ba-lum ah-ooh ♪
769
00:32:06,357 --> 00:32:08,393
I want to see Freedom again.
770
00:32:08,393 --> 00:32:11,596
I want love and hot sex.
771
00:32:12,230 --> 00:32:21,973
♪ Sha-ba-lum ah-ooh ♪
772
00:32:21,973 --> 00:32:22,807
[PHONE BEEPS]
773
00:32:22,807 --> 00:32:24,709
♪ Sha-ba-lum ah-ooh ♪
774
00:32:24,709 --> 00:32:27,278
[FOREIGN MUSIC PLAYING]
775
00:32:48,499 --> 00:32:50,735
I hope you don't think
I'm easy.
776
00:32:50,735 --> 00:32:52,170
Why would I think you're easy?
777
00:32:52,170 --> 00:32:54,706
'Cause we had sex
on the first date.
778
00:32:55,306 --> 00:32:56,941
I think it's weird
not to have sex
779
00:32:56,941 --> 00:32:58,609
on the first date.
780
00:32:58,977 --> 00:32:59,911
Really?
781
00:32:59,911 --> 00:33:03,414
Hey, do you want to go back
to my place and get stoned?
782
00:33:03,414 --> 00:33:04,282
-Uh-huh.
-Yeah?
783
00:33:04,282 --> 00:33:09,620
♪ Sha-ba-lum ah-ooh ♪
784
00:33:10,955 --> 00:33:12,523
One second.
785
00:33:22,066 --> 00:33:25,103
-Want a hit?
-I don't really smoke.
786
00:33:25,103 --> 00:33:27,705
-Oh, come on. Just one.
-Okay.
787
00:33:27,705 --> 00:33:29,340
[LAUGHING]
788
00:33:32,176 --> 00:33:34,712
-Yeah.
-[COUGHING]
789
00:33:35,580 --> 00:33:37,148
You all right?
790
00:33:37,148 --> 00:33:37,949
[COUGHING] Yeah.
791
00:33:37,949 --> 00:33:40,385
-You okay?
-Mm-hm. Mm-hm.
792
00:33:43,488 --> 00:33:44,989
When we were together...
793
00:33:44,989 --> 00:33:47,859
could you feel that energy
going back...
794
00:33:47,859 --> 00:33:49,894
and forth between our souls?
795
00:33:49,894 --> 00:33:52,430
-It felt amazing.
-Yeah. Yeah.
796
00:33:52,430 --> 00:33:55,233
I don't think we even need
to talk, yeah?
797
00:33:55,233 --> 00:33:56,300
Can't you just...
798
00:33:56,300 --> 00:33:59,370
-feel what I'm thinking?
-Uh...
799
00:34:01,906 --> 00:34:03,574
I don't think so.
800
00:34:03,641 --> 00:34:05,643
I bet you can, yeah?
801
00:34:09,614 --> 00:34:11,416
Can you feel it now?
802
00:34:12,417 --> 00:34:16,020
-Couldn't you just tell me?
-No, no, no.
803
00:34:22,493 --> 00:34:24,095
What about now?
804
00:34:28,433 --> 00:34:29,634
Now?
805
00:34:29,634 --> 00:34:32,570
I'm the most wonderful person
you've ever met?
806
00:34:34,505 --> 00:34:36,240
[SIGHING]
807
00:34:37,141 --> 00:34:39,877
-[FREEDOM GROANING]
-[HONEY MOANING]
808
00:34:41,579 --> 00:34:43,247
[HONEY MOANING]
809
00:34:52,356 --> 00:34:54,392
[MUSIC PLAYING]
810
00:35:00,131 --> 00:35:08,272
♪ All I could ever need
Is you and I ♪
811
00:35:18,015 --> 00:35:21,986
♪ And all I could ever want ♪
812
00:35:21,986 --> 00:35:25,456
♪ All I could ever see ♪
813
00:35:25,456 --> 00:35:28,759
♪ All I could ever want ♪
814
00:35:28,759 --> 00:35:35,633
♪ All I could ever need
Is you... ♪
815
00:35:38,870 --> 00:35:42,206
♪ Oh I choose ♪
816
00:35:46,644 --> 00:35:50,248
♪ And all I could ever want ♪
817
00:35:50,248 --> 00:35:56,854
♪ All I could ever need
Is you... ♪
818
00:35:57,121 --> 00:35:59,991
WOMAN: You have never done
anything wrong.
819
00:36:00,091 --> 00:36:03,628
Sex is sacred and beautiful.
820
00:36:04,595 --> 00:36:10,234
♪ All I could ever need
Is you... ♪
821
00:36:10,234 --> 00:36:14,438
What if all the sluts
had mind-blowing orgasms?
822
00:36:14,438 --> 00:36:17,875
Only when they're empowered
by their orgasms
823
00:36:17,875 --> 00:36:20,278
can they defeat the evil mutant.
824
00:36:21,312 --> 00:36:24,882
Empowered sluts. I like that.
That's-- that's provocative.
825
00:36:24,882 --> 00:36:27,985
You think we can get that past
the ratings board?
826
00:36:28,686 --> 00:36:30,388
Hey, guys, uh,
827
00:36:30,388 --> 00:36:32,423
sorry, I just downloaded
this new app.
828
00:36:32,423 --> 00:36:34,659
It detects shitty movie ideas,
829
00:36:34,659 --> 00:36:37,495
and it literally led me
right here.
830
00:36:37,862 --> 00:36:38,896
Anyway...
831
00:36:38,896 --> 00:36:41,265
let me know if you have
any real movie ideas
832
00:36:41,265 --> 00:36:44,569
that we can turn
into actual movies.
833
00:36:44,802 --> 00:36:47,038
Okay. Bye.
834
00:36:51,509 --> 00:36:53,077
Encouraging.
835
00:36:53,077 --> 00:36:54,412
Love that guy.
836
00:36:54,412 --> 00:36:56,514
Oh, I wanted to say, um,
837
00:36:56,514 --> 00:36:57,648
I-- I read your script,
838
00:36:57,648 --> 00:37:01,085
uh, about the Afghan woman
who fights for the right
839
00:37:01,085 --> 00:37:03,521
to divorce her husband.
That was strong.
840
00:37:03,521 --> 00:37:04,755
How did you get a copy of that?
841
00:37:04,755 --> 00:37:07,658
I got connects.
You know what I'm saying?
842
00:37:07,658 --> 00:37:08,893
-Whoa.
-Actually,
843
00:37:08,893 --> 00:37:11,162
Peter wanted me
to, uh, write coverage.
844
00:37:11,162 --> 00:37:13,130
Oh, I thought he read that one.
845
00:37:13,130 --> 00:37:14,665
Well, I don't know.
He's a busy guy.
846
00:37:14,665 --> 00:37:18,069
But I really love the scene
where Afshan says, um,
847
00:37:18,069 --> 00:37:22,173
"This is my woman part
to do with what I want."
848
00:37:22,173 --> 00:37:25,409
-[SIGHS]
-That was pretty intense.
849
00:37:25,843 --> 00:37:28,946
-You really liked it?
-Yeah, it was powerful.
850
00:37:33,117 --> 00:37:34,619
[PHONE BEEPS]
851
00:37:34,619 --> 00:37:36,287
[CHUCKLING]
852
00:37:46,230 --> 00:37:48,266
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
853
00:37:59,010 --> 00:38:01,279
I want love.
854
00:38:04,849 --> 00:38:07,351
[MUSIC PLAYING]
855
00:38:09,220 --> 00:38:10,554
And so mote it be.
856
00:38:10,554 --> 00:38:12,323
♪ Ah-ooh ♪
857
00:38:13,057 --> 00:38:14,825
♪ Ah-ooh ♪
858
00:38:15,860 --> 00:38:17,261
Oh, thank you, honey.
859
00:38:17,261 --> 00:38:20,631
Hi, um, I'll just take
a regular coffee, please. Um,
860
00:38:20,631 --> 00:38:24,201
I'm just looking for this guy.
I think he works here.
861
00:38:24,201 --> 00:38:26,671
I don't know his name,
but he's 28.
862
00:38:26,671 --> 00:38:29,740
I know, 28. I know. I know.
I know what you're thinking.
863
00:38:29,740 --> 00:38:31,275
Do you know
who I'm talking about?
864
00:38:31,275 --> 00:38:32,710
-MAN: No.
-No?
865
00:38:32,710 --> 00:38:33,678
Eva?
866
00:38:33,678 --> 00:38:35,279
-Mark!
-MARK: Hi!
867
00:38:35,279 --> 00:38:36,681
Oh, my God.
868
00:38:36,681 --> 00:38:39,116
Oh, it's been so long.
How are you?
869
00:38:39,116 --> 00:38:41,786
Good. I'm okay. Yeah.
870
00:38:41,786 --> 00:38:42,853
How's Darren?
871
00:38:42,853 --> 00:38:45,923
We got a divorce.
He didn't tell you?
872
00:38:45,923 --> 00:38:48,626
Uh, yeah, I... I heard.
873
00:38:48,993 --> 00:38:50,961
-Sorry.
-Yeah.
874
00:38:50,961 --> 00:38:53,798
Uh, Rebecca and I got divorced,
too.
875
00:38:54,098 --> 00:38:55,399
I'm so sorry.
876
00:38:55,399 --> 00:38:57,968
No, actually, it's for the best.
877
00:38:58,035 --> 00:38:59,837
Plus we have
two beautiful daughters,
878
00:38:59,837 --> 00:39:02,573
five and ten, so no regrets.
879
00:39:03,274 --> 00:39:05,009
[MUSIC PLAYING]
880
00:39:05,009 --> 00:39:06,544
-Don't you want to get a coffee?
-Uh,
881
00:39:06,544 --> 00:39:09,213
yeah, yeah.
That's what I'm here for.
882
00:39:09,213 --> 00:39:10,114
[CHUCKLES
883
00:39:10,114 --> 00:39:13,217
-What are you doing right now?
-Uh...
884
00:39:13,684 --> 00:39:14,452
nothing.
885
00:39:14,452 --> 00:39:17,221
You want to go for a walk,
catch up a little?
886
00:39:17,221 --> 00:39:19,457
Yeah, I'd really like that.
887
00:39:19,890 --> 00:39:21,659
I was making dresses
in my kitchen,
888
00:39:21,659 --> 00:39:24,595
and then just, boom!
You know?
889
00:39:24,595 --> 00:39:26,230
That's amazing.
890
00:39:28,232 --> 00:39:30,501
I'm sorry to hear
about your divorce. Uh...
891
00:39:30,501 --> 00:39:34,171
-I feel like such a failure.
-Oh, don't say that.
892
00:39:34,171 --> 00:39:35,840
I just wish
we would've had kids,
893
00:39:35,840 --> 00:39:38,109
you know, like you guys,
but we were
894
00:39:38,109 --> 00:39:39,810
never on the same page
with that.
895
00:39:39,810 --> 00:39:42,880
Eva, you are in no way
a failure.
896
00:39:42,880 --> 00:39:47,084
You're a huge, huge success
in every way.
897
00:39:49,787 --> 00:39:51,422
Wow.
898
00:39:53,524 --> 00:39:55,092
Stunning.
899
00:39:55,359 --> 00:39:57,962
Thank you. It's true.
900
00:39:59,196 --> 00:40:02,099
"Thank you. It's true."
I like that.
901
00:40:03,934 --> 00:40:06,203
Did you know
I left the law firm?
902
00:40:06,203 --> 00:40:07,204
No.
903
00:40:07,204 --> 00:40:09,206
Yeah, you know,
grew the hair out,
904
00:40:09,206 --> 00:40:10,975
stopped shaving...
905
00:40:11,275 --> 00:40:12,910
opened a restaurant.
906
00:40:12,910 --> 00:40:14,345
No way!
907
00:40:14,345 --> 00:40:16,347
Yeah.
You always told me I should.
908
00:40:16,347 --> 00:40:17,915
Remember that night
I made the panna cotta
909
00:40:17,915 --> 00:40:19,817
-with the aged balsamico?
-Yes.
910
00:40:19,817 --> 00:40:22,820
I had, like, a food orgasm
over that dessert.
911
00:40:22,820 --> 00:40:24,555
[CHUCKLES] Yes, you did.
912
00:40:25,556 --> 00:40:27,191
[CHUCKLING]
913
00:40:27,391 --> 00:40:29,193
Congratulations.
914
00:40:29,493 --> 00:40:30,895
You're amazing.
915
00:40:30,895 --> 00:40:32,430
Thank you.
916
00:40:32,596 --> 00:40:34,131
It's true.
917
00:40:34,799 --> 00:40:36,200
[SCOFFS]
918
00:40:36,200 --> 00:40:39,203
I feel a little lost in my life.
919
00:40:39,970 --> 00:40:41,872
-You know?
-Okay.
920
00:40:41,872 --> 00:40:43,240
I don't know, like,
921
00:40:43,240 --> 00:40:44,175
why am I a success?
922
00:40:44,175 --> 00:40:46,977
I mean,
is it because I make dresses?
923
00:40:48,179 --> 00:40:49,013
Um...
924
00:40:49,013 --> 00:40:51,482
yeah, I suppose
everybody would say that,
925
00:40:51,482 --> 00:40:53,984
but, uh, personally?
926
00:40:56,253 --> 00:40:59,123
You're just good to be around.
927
00:40:59,623 --> 00:41:02,793
I'm always happy
when I'm near you.
928
00:41:03,594 --> 00:41:06,597
That is crazy-sweet.
929
00:41:07,631 --> 00:41:10,167
And you are crazy-beautiful.
930
00:41:10,568 --> 00:41:12,236
[CHUCKLES] Oh, wait.
931
00:41:12,236 --> 00:41:14,705
Oh, my God! What-- what?
932
00:41:18,843 --> 00:41:21,579
I've had a crush on you
for 14 years.
933
00:41:21,579 --> 00:41:24,582
Really? Why? [CHUCKLES]
934
00:41:24,849 --> 00:41:27,084
Wait, wait, wait.
935
00:41:27,084 --> 00:41:27,785
What-- what, uh,
936
00:41:27,785 --> 00:41:29,987
what are we do--
what are we doing? Because I--
937
00:41:29,987 --> 00:41:31,355
I haven't been with anyone
938
00:41:31,355 --> 00:41:32,690
-since my husband--
-Shh.
939
00:41:32,690 --> 00:41:36,026
Um-- I would like
to keep my clothes on.
940
00:41:36,360 --> 00:41:37,928
If you just--
941
00:41:37,928 --> 00:41:39,763
Uh... God, you're--
942
00:41:39,763 --> 00:41:41,165
Um-- Oh, my God! Wait!
943
00:41:41,165 --> 00:41:44,635
Wait a second! That's--
Oh, my God! [CHUCKLES]
944
00:41:44,635 --> 00:41:47,404
Oh, my God!
You're so good at this!
945
00:41:47,404 --> 00:41:49,039
I've wanted to do this
since I met you.
946
00:41:49,039 --> 00:41:51,375
That's what you were thinking
the whole time...
947
00:41:51,375 --> 00:41:54,144
when we met at Walmart?
Are you kidding me?
948
00:41:54,144 --> 00:41:55,613
-Mm.
-That's kind of weird.
949
00:41:55,613 --> 00:41:58,782
Thank you for telling me,
'cause I was, like, thinking,
950
00:41:58,782 --> 00:42:00,985
"Oh, nice guy at Walmart.
951
00:42:00,985 --> 00:42:04,021
He-- he buys, like,
stuff in bulk. I get it."
952
00:42:04,021 --> 00:42:07,324
Oh. Uh... Oh, my God. Oh, God.
953
00:42:07,324 --> 00:42:09,393
Oh, God.
And I then was, like,
954
00:42:09,393 --> 00:42:10,628
"Hey, you drive a Prius.
955
00:42:10,628 --> 00:42:13,330
And that's cool.
You know, cool person."
956
00:42:13,330 --> 00:42:14,131
Hey, what-- what--
957
00:42:14,131 --> 00:42:17,434
Just slow down on
that bottom part. Oh, my God.
958
00:42:17,434 --> 00:42:18,669
Shut up.
I'm gonna stop talking now.
959
00:42:18,669 --> 00:42:23,007
I'm not gonna talk anymore.
I'm not gonna talk anymore.
960
00:42:23,541 --> 00:42:25,242
[MOANING]
961
00:42:25,242 --> 00:42:26,877
You're, like,
really good at this.
962
00:42:26,877 --> 00:42:29,046
Oh, God. Wait,
I didn't groom. I didn't groom!
963
00:42:29,046 --> 00:42:31,181
Ah! Okay, okay, no, actually,
I'm okay with that.
964
00:42:31,181 --> 00:42:34,351
I'm okay with it. Never mind.
Don't listen to me. Don't stop.
965
00:42:34,351 --> 00:42:36,720
Don't stop. [GIGGLING]
966
00:42:36,720 --> 00:42:39,490
[MOANING]
967
00:42:40,090 --> 00:42:42,226
[MUSIC PLAYING]
968
00:42:42,993 --> 00:42:44,728
I want love.
969
00:42:48,499 --> 00:42:51,936
[MUSIC PLAYING]
970
00:42:53,637 --> 00:42:54,772
Babe?
971
00:42:54,772 --> 00:42:57,474
Do you have, uh, that bag?
I'm doing that lecture
972
00:42:57,474 --> 00:43:00,277
on techno-social wormholes
downtown, and they're, uh--
973
00:43:00,277 --> 00:43:02,479
they're gonna put it
on YouTube.
974
00:43:02,479 --> 00:43:04,248
Isn't that great?
975
00:43:05,583 --> 00:43:08,118
I didn't have time
to do your laundry.
976
00:43:08,185 --> 00:43:09,653
And...
977
00:43:11,155 --> 00:43:14,658
if you want to be with me,
you can't date anybody else.
978
00:43:15,392 --> 00:43:17,361
Have you noticed that I'm great?
979
00:43:17,361 --> 00:43:18,729
'Cause you don't treat me
that way.
980
00:43:18,729 --> 00:43:21,498
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Where's all this coming from?
981
00:43:21,498 --> 00:43:22,533
It's coming from me.
982
00:43:22,533 --> 00:43:26,203
But you were fine
with everything a few days ago.
983
00:43:26,537 --> 00:43:28,005
I take care of you.
984
00:43:28,005 --> 00:43:29,540
When are you gonna take care
of me?
985
00:43:29,540 --> 00:43:32,543
Relationships are hard for me.
My parents got divorced.
986
00:43:32,543 --> 00:43:33,477
Oh, God! Stop it!
987
00:43:33,477 --> 00:43:36,814
Stop using that as an excuse
for everything!
988
00:43:36,814 --> 00:43:39,950
My family was fucked up, too!
Let it go!
989
00:43:40,150 --> 00:43:43,921
I don't really like your tone
of voice right now, honestly.
990
00:43:43,921 --> 00:43:45,856
You need to figure that out.
991
00:43:45,856 --> 00:43:49,627
Uh, well, those don't look
very clean to me.
992
00:43:50,327 --> 00:43:51,762
No.
993
00:43:52,062 --> 00:43:54,031
They're very dirty.
994
00:43:54,264 --> 00:43:56,266
-What?
-Yeah.
995
00:43:56,734 --> 00:43:57,768
Extremely dirty.
996
00:43:57,768 --> 00:44:00,204
-And smelly!
-Babe, seriously?
997
00:44:00,204 --> 00:44:01,271
[GRUNTS]
You know, you're gonna--
998
00:44:01,271 --> 00:44:02,706
you're gonna
regret this tomorrow.
999
00:44:02,706 --> 00:44:05,476
And-- and when you do,
you can call me, okay?
1000
00:44:05,476 --> 00:44:10,147
When you are ready to treat me
like the amazing person I am,
1001
00:44:10,147 --> 00:44:13,317
you call me!
I won't be calling you.
1002
00:44:14,284 --> 00:44:15,786
Take that!
1003
00:44:15,786 --> 00:44:18,188
I was gonna wear this.
I was gonna wear this.
1004
00:44:18,188 --> 00:44:21,558
Now it's even more dirty.
It's more dirty now.
1005
00:44:21,558 --> 00:44:23,193
Pussy!
1006
00:44:24,561 --> 00:44:26,530
[MUSIC PLAYING]
1007
00:44:26,530 --> 00:44:29,967
And, uh, where am I gonna
clean these?
1008
00:44:30,567 --> 00:44:32,269
Do you have a place?
1009
00:44:32,569 --> 00:44:36,006
Okay, you know what? Thank you.
Thank you. That's great.
1010
00:44:36,006 --> 00:44:37,508
Okay, we'll-- we'll talk.
1011
00:44:37,508 --> 00:44:39,610
The guy shows her the beauty
of her own soul
1012
00:44:39,610 --> 00:44:43,313
through sexuality,
and then she defeats the killer.
1013
00:44:43,313 --> 00:44:44,615
-[SIGHS]
-Hmm. Well, I'm not sure
1014
00:44:44,615 --> 00:44:46,283
how to fit that
into a teenage slasher film,
1015
00:44:46,283 --> 00:44:49,853
but I like the challenge.
I'm gonna get cracking on it.
1016
00:44:50,054 --> 00:44:52,256
PETER: Don't shoot the dinosaur.
He's on your side.
1017
00:44:52,256 --> 00:44:53,090
What are you guys doing?
1018
00:44:53,090 --> 00:44:54,892
We're working on a video game
based on the film.
1019
00:44:54,892 --> 00:44:57,861
Yeah, it's really gonna
boost our profits on this one.
1020
00:44:57,861 --> 00:45:00,764
Peter came up with it
all by himself.
1021
00:45:00,764 --> 00:45:03,133
The goal of the game
is to build up your empire...
1022
00:45:03,133 --> 00:45:05,035
-This is my idea.
-...and kill as many sluts
1023
00:45:05,035 --> 00:45:06,570
and douchebags
that get in your way.
1024
00:45:06,570 --> 00:45:07,371
That's is my idea.
1025
00:45:07,371 --> 00:45:08,539
Once you reach
the higher levels,
1026
00:45:08,539 --> 00:45:09,807
-you'll meet a virgin...
-This is my idea.
1027
00:45:09,807 --> 00:45:11,442
-...with special powers.
-My idea. My idea.
1028
00:45:11,442 --> 00:45:13,043
Every time you see a slut,
1029
00:45:13,043 --> 00:45:14,445
-you can kill her...
-That's my idea.
1030
00:45:14,445 --> 00:45:15,579
-...and get the points.
-My idea.
1031
00:45:15,579 --> 00:45:18,082
Sometimes I like to shoot her
in the boobs or crotch area.
1032
00:45:18,082 --> 00:45:20,050
-[LAUGHING]
-The last one was his idea.
1033
00:45:20,050 --> 00:45:25,189
-[SCREAMS]
-Boom! That slut went down!
1034
00:45:26,323 --> 00:45:28,325
-So what do you think?
-[MAN LAUGHING IN GAME]
1035
00:45:28,325 --> 00:45:29,460
I think it's really disturbing
1036
00:45:29,460 --> 00:45:31,929
and it makes me want to, like,
vomit in my mouth.
1037
00:45:31,929 --> 00:45:33,997
Hey, man, I need you
to go through the video game
1038
00:45:33,997 --> 00:45:35,232
and make sure
that all of the girls,
1039
00:45:35,232 --> 00:45:36,967
under their shirts, you can see
their erect nipples.
1040
00:45:36,967 --> 00:45:39,670
-I need you to do that for me.
-Great idea!
1041
00:45:39,670 --> 00:45:40,337
So smart.
1042
00:45:40,337 --> 00:45:42,339
Look, The script
that John and I are writing
1043
00:45:42,339 --> 00:45:43,540
is a totally different story.
1044
00:45:43,540 --> 00:45:45,275
Yeah, I know, and thank God
it's a different story,
1045
00:45:45,275 --> 00:45:48,679
because your script sucked shit,
and this video game
1046
00:45:48,679 --> 00:45:49,646
is going to sell like Molly
1047
00:45:49,646 --> 00:45:52,015
to a girl that doesn't talk
to her parents that much, okay?
1048
00:45:52,015 --> 00:45:53,550
I need you to be on
nipple supervision, all right?
1049
00:45:53,550 --> 00:45:55,352
You got to go through
the video game and make sure
1050
00:45:55,352 --> 00:45:57,387
that every girl's nipples
are erect, okay?
1051
00:45:57,387 --> 00:45:58,989
We're gonna go
for the only demographic
1052
00:45:58,989 --> 00:46:00,624
that matters,
and that's teenage boys.
1053
00:46:00,624 --> 00:46:02,493
Well, that's ridiculous
because John and I
1054
00:46:02,493 --> 00:46:03,861
are writing a great script.
1055
00:46:03,861 --> 00:46:05,662
I'm sorry. That app is going off
that I downloaded.
1056
00:46:05,662 --> 00:46:07,564
It keeps going off
when people say stupid shit.
1057
00:46:07,564 --> 00:46:08,899
Uh, let me fix this.
Turn it off.
1058
00:46:08,899 --> 00:46:12,703
[CLEARS THROAT] You want to know
what men really get off on?
1059
00:46:12,703 --> 00:46:13,804
No.
1060
00:46:13,804 --> 00:46:14,905
The conquest, okay?
1061
00:46:14,905 --> 00:46:16,940
Look, I'm a hunter.
We're hunters. We're men.
1062
00:46:16,940 --> 00:46:20,410
I'm a man. I'm a hunter, okay?
I hunted you. I got you.
1063
00:46:20,410 --> 00:46:21,912
I found you.
I kept you for a little bit,
1064
00:46:21,912 --> 00:46:24,715
and then I got bored,
and then you left and now I'm--
1065
00:46:24,715 --> 00:46:27,751
I'm attracted to you again,
you know? That's what works.
1066
00:46:27,751 --> 00:46:28,819
The plan worked, okay?
1067
00:46:28,819 --> 00:46:32,022
So let's just go have sex
in my office.
1068
00:46:32,022 --> 00:46:33,457
No.
1069
00:46:33,824 --> 00:46:35,726
Everything you have is...
1070
00:46:36,660 --> 00:46:40,030
Turn your fucking head.
What's your... What's your name?
1071
00:46:40,030 --> 00:46:40,697
Demarcus.
1072
00:46:40,697 --> 00:46:41,932
You're the whitest guy
in the world,
1073
00:46:41,932 --> 00:46:46,270
and his name's fucking Demarcus.
Hey, I'm DeShawn.
1074
00:46:46,570 --> 00:46:47,137
Anyway,
1075
00:46:47,137 --> 00:46:51,441
every-- everything you have
is because of me.
1076
00:46:51,441 --> 00:46:53,477
But I want to be a writer.
1077
00:46:53,477 --> 00:46:54,711
Can you just make sure
you supervise
1078
00:46:54,711 --> 00:46:56,713
all the nipples, please?
That's what I need from you.
1079
00:46:56,713 --> 00:47:00,117
That is, if you want to get
a paycheck, big boobs.
1080
00:47:03,754 --> 00:47:04,488
[SIGHS]
1081
00:47:04,488 --> 00:47:07,457
"I want to be a writer."
[MUMBLING]
1082
00:47:08,325 --> 00:47:11,428
Mark was down there
for so long.
1083
00:47:11,428 --> 00:47:13,330
I wonder
what he was thinking about.
1084
00:47:13,330 --> 00:47:16,133
-He was thinking: Yum, yum!
-[LAUGHING]
1085
00:47:16,133 --> 00:47:18,001
I feel like guys
who won't go down on you
1086
00:47:18,001 --> 00:47:18,902
aren't hetero enough.
1087
00:47:18,902 --> 00:47:20,838
I mean, what would
they rather be doing,
1088
00:47:20,838 --> 00:47:22,472
sucking a cock?
1089
00:47:22,539 --> 00:47:23,373
This guy sounds amazing.
1090
00:47:23,373 --> 00:47:24,908
You can totally tell
the difference between a guy
1091
00:47:24,908 --> 00:47:26,610
who's into it
and a guy who's not.
1092
00:47:26,610 --> 00:47:28,779
I didn't even know
that I liked it that much,
1093
00:47:28,779 --> 00:47:32,182
but I haven't had sex
with a lot of people.
1094
00:47:32,382 --> 00:47:33,350
It's good if a guy's good at it.
1095
00:47:33,350 --> 00:47:36,787
Otherwise, it's like sandpaper
rubbing against your clitoris
1096
00:47:36,787 --> 00:47:38,755
while you lay in a pool
of saliva.
1097
00:47:38,755 --> 00:47:40,057
-Ah!
-Oh!
1098
00:47:40,057 --> 00:47:41,625
Well, this guy was great at it.
1099
00:47:41,625 --> 00:47:43,727
I think he could write
an instruction manual
1100
00:47:43,727 --> 00:47:45,062
-on tonguemanship.
-Wow!
1101
00:47:45,062 --> 00:47:47,965
-Did you have sex?
-I had great sex.
1102
00:47:47,965 --> 00:47:49,933
-I had the best sex of my life.
-[BOTH GASP]
1103
00:47:49,933 --> 00:47:52,369
You guys both had great sex
and I got nothing.
1104
00:47:52,369 --> 00:47:53,303
Are you going out again?
1105
00:47:53,303 --> 00:47:54,872
I don't know.
What's the point?
1106
00:47:54,872 --> 00:47:57,007
-Getting head!
-The best sex of your life.
1107
00:47:57,007 --> 00:47:59,343
I can't. I just look better
with clothes on.
1108
00:47:59,343 --> 00:48:01,278
I don't want him
to see me naked.
1109
00:48:01,278 --> 00:48:03,013
But you let him lick
your naked vagina.
1110
00:48:03,013 --> 00:48:05,082
I know, but that was
just one tiny section
1111
00:48:05,082 --> 00:48:07,918
down there.
And-- and I had clothes on.
1112
00:48:07,918 --> 00:48:09,853
Plus, I work
with models all day at work,
1113
00:48:09,853 --> 00:48:11,121
and they're
in such great shape.
1114
00:48:11,121 --> 00:48:13,624
Just-- I look like crap
compared to them.
1115
00:48:13,624 --> 00:48:15,025
You are hot!
1116
00:48:15,492 --> 00:48:16,593
I don't know.
1117
00:48:16,593 --> 00:48:18,228
Maybe he's too nice.
1118
00:48:18,228 --> 00:48:20,130
I'd take nice
over mean any day.
1119
00:48:20,130 --> 00:48:22,766
Yeah, or commitment-phobic.
1120
00:48:23,400 --> 00:48:26,236
Let's make a pact
to be with good guys only.
1121
00:48:26,236 --> 00:48:29,439
Guys who treat us great,
like we deserve.
1122
00:48:29,539 --> 00:48:31,575
Yeah, good-guy pact.
1123
00:48:31,975 --> 00:48:33,543
Mark is so handsome.
1124
00:48:33,543 --> 00:48:35,445
There must be
something wrong with him.
1125
00:48:35,445 --> 00:48:37,381
Or maybe I just don't know
how to be with someone
1126
00:48:37,381 --> 00:48:40,117
who's so sexually giving,
which means I like jerks,
1127
00:48:40,117 --> 00:48:42,786
which also means I can't be
in the good-guy pact.
1128
00:48:42,786 --> 00:48:45,088
I'm gonna light a candle
for you and Mark.
1129
00:48:45,088 --> 00:48:46,957
Me, too. Okay.
1130
00:48:46,957 --> 00:48:48,492
-Don't forget the pact.
-[SIGHS]
1131
00:48:48,492 --> 00:48:49,326
Good guys only.
1132
00:48:49,326 --> 00:48:51,361
-Good guys only.
-Good guys only.
1133
00:48:51,361 --> 00:48:53,063
-Maybe sometimes a jerk?
-No.
1134
00:48:53,063 --> 00:48:54,898
-No.
-No? Jerk sex?
1135
00:48:54,898 --> 00:48:57,034
-No jerk sex.
-Aw.
1136
00:49:00,938 --> 00:49:04,441
-[PHONE RINGING]
-[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
1137
00:49:07,177 --> 00:49:07,978
Oh, hey.
1138
00:49:07,978 --> 00:49:10,647
Um, thank you
for sending me your script,
1139
00:49:10,647 --> 00:49:13,917
The Red Flow.
I-- I thought it was hilarious.
1140
00:49:13,917 --> 00:49:15,953
-You read it?
-I loved it.
1141
00:49:15,953 --> 00:49:16,954
Yeah, but will it ever be made?
1142
00:49:16,954 --> 00:49:19,923
A movie about a girl
getting her period.
1143
00:49:20,357 --> 00:49:21,191
Why not?
1144
00:49:21,191 --> 00:49:23,226
You know, I really want
to write a script
1145
00:49:23,226 --> 00:49:24,394
about my new friends.
They're, like,
1146
00:49:24,394 --> 00:49:27,164
these modern-day witches.
They're really inspiring.
1147
00:49:27,164 --> 00:49:29,466
Yes, witches, girl power.
1148
00:49:29,833 --> 00:49:31,301
Do it.
1149
00:49:31,935 --> 00:49:33,103
Have you heard
about this video game
1150
00:49:33,103 --> 00:49:35,205
that Peter is doing?
It is so vile.
1151
00:49:35,205 --> 00:49:36,306
Yeah, I heard about it.
1152
00:49:36,306 --> 00:49:37,808
I wish I could destroy
the computers
1153
00:49:37,808 --> 00:49:41,645
or make my own video game
called Sluts Fight Back.
1154
00:49:41,645 --> 00:49:44,348
[CHUCKLES]
I love that. "Sluts Fight Back."
1155
00:49:44,348 --> 00:49:45,983
If I was technological,
I'd just put a virus
1156
00:49:45,983 --> 00:49:48,852
in the whole system
and I would shut it down.
1157
00:49:48,852 --> 00:49:50,320
Well...
1158
00:49:51,688 --> 00:49:54,091
well, it's funny
that you say that,
1159
00:49:54,091 --> 00:49:56,593
'cause I happen to be
technological.
1160
00:49:56,593 --> 00:49:59,763
[MUSIC PLAYING]
1161
00:50:09,272 --> 00:50:10,607
What are you doing?
1162
00:50:10,607 --> 00:50:13,443
-[TYPING]
-Technological stuff.
1163
00:50:13,443 --> 00:50:15,779
[SIGHS] We could be fired.
1164
00:50:15,779 --> 00:50:18,115
Not if no one finds out.
1165
00:50:18,115 --> 00:50:21,084
[MUSIC PLAYING]
1166
00:50:26,690 --> 00:50:28,492
[LAUGHING]
1167
00:50:28,492 --> 00:50:31,028
God. [SIGHS]
1168
00:50:31,028 --> 00:50:32,162
-You're a genius.
-Yeah,
1169
00:50:32,162 --> 00:50:33,630
you know what?
I am a freaking genius.
1170
00:50:33,630 --> 00:50:35,732
-That was awesome.
-[SIGHS]
1171
00:50:36,033 --> 00:50:37,868
It was so awesome.
1172
00:50:37,868 --> 00:50:39,936
What are you doing now?
You wanna-- you wanna
1173
00:50:39,936 --> 00:50:43,073
-grab something to eat?
-Oh, I have plans.
1174
00:50:43,140 --> 00:50:44,441
This may or may
not change your mind,
1175
00:50:44,441 --> 00:50:47,911
but aside from being a genius
and a technological wizard,
1176
00:50:47,911 --> 00:50:50,147
I am also, um...
1177
00:50:50,280 --> 00:50:51,581
a really great rapper.
1178
00:50:51,581 --> 00:50:53,450
-Really?
-Yeah, I'd love to show you
1179
00:50:53,450 --> 00:50:54,885
some of my hip-hop stuff.
1180
00:50:54,885 --> 00:50:56,753
-Okay.
-You ready for this?
1181
00:50:56,753 --> 00:50:57,821
-Yeah.
-You sure?
1182
00:50:57,821 --> 00:50:59,756
-Uh, I think so.
-Mm-hmm.
1183
00:51:00,023 --> 00:51:01,425
Um...
1184
00:51:01,525 --> 00:51:03,660
♪ You so ambitious ♪
1185
00:51:03,660 --> 00:51:06,329
♪ Your soul is sweet
And superstitious ♪
1186
00:51:06,329 --> 00:51:09,399
♪ Your eyes your lip
Your heart ♪
1187
00:51:10,000 --> 00:51:14,071
♪ They're breakin' records
And the dishes ♪
1188
00:51:14,071 --> 00:51:16,339
♪ Mm-mm mm-mm ♪
1189
00:51:16,339 --> 00:51:19,176
♪ Mm-mm-mm
Chicka-chicka ♪
1190
00:51:19,176 --> 00:51:20,877
♪ Mm-mm mm-mm ♪
1191
00:51:20,877 --> 00:51:22,846
This goes on for, like,
four minutes.
1192
00:51:22,846 --> 00:51:23,980
[CHUCKLES] Wow.
1193
00:51:23,980 --> 00:51:26,149
-Don't give up your day job.
-[LAUGHING] Come on!
1194
00:51:26,149 --> 00:51:28,452
-No, it was great. I loved it.
-I just wanted to do it.
1195
00:51:28,452 --> 00:51:29,686
-That was brave.
-I had an instinct.
1196
00:51:29,686 --> 00:51:32,355
Yeah, anyway, you got
the technology smarts.
1197
00:51:32,355 --> 00:51:33,557
-Thanks, yo.
-Word to your mother.
1198
00:51:33,557 --> 00:51:35,759
Word to your mother.
Tell your mother I said word.
1199
00:51:35,759 --> 00:51:38,195
-[CHUCKLES] See you Monday.
-Bye.
1200
00:51:38,195 --> 00:51:41,598
[MUSIC PLAYING]
1201
00:51:45,268 --> 00:51:47,471
HONEY: Thanks for giving me
this dress.
1202
00:51:47,471 --> 00:51:48,338
CANDY: Ditto.
1203
00:51:48,338 --> 00:51:50,073
Oh, God. Okay, okay,
I don't know.
1204
00:51:50,073 --> 00:51:51,141
Maybe we shouldn't go.
1205
00:51:51,141 --> 00:51:52,776
-How do I look?
-CANDY: You look hot!
1206
00:51:52,776 --> 00:51:54,311
You look so hot
I want to have sex with you.
1207
00:51:54,311 --> 00:51:57,514
EVA: Okay, no, I just-- Oh!
Would you guys stop it?
1208
00:51:57,514 --> 00:51:58,748
-Stop it!
-I really wanna
1209
00:51:58,748 --> 00:52:00,283
-have sex with you.
-Oh, my God,
1210
00:52:00,283 --> 00:52:01,351
you guys are weird.
1211
00:52:01,351 --> 00:52:04,421
Okay, come on.
I can't do this alone. Come on.
1212
00:52:04,421 --> 00:52:06,623
[JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING]
1213
00:52:06,623 --> 00:52:08,091
-WOMAN: Great show.
-[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
1214
00:52:08,091 --> 00:52:10,227
HONEY: Does Darren have
a daughter?
1215
00:52:10,227 --> 00:52:12,662
No, that's his new girlfriend.
1216
00:52:12,662 --> 00:52:14,865
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
1217
00:52:15,732 --> 00:52:17,167
Oh.
1218
00:52:17,501 --> 00:52:20,070
Oh!
1219
00:52:20,070 --> 00:52:22,572
Holy shit!
1220
00:52:22,572 --> 00:52:26,376
-HONEY: Is that you?
-EVA: Holy shit!
1221
00:52:26,576 --> 00:52:28,145
Is that me?
1222
00:52:28,211 --> 00:52:29,379
Oh, my God.
1223
00:52:29,379 --> 00:52:34,217
Not entirely accurate, okay?
It's not 1984 down there.
1224
00:52:34,217 --> 00:52:36,586
Oh, I prefer a full bush.
1225
00:52:36,586 --> 00:52:37,654
-Really?
-Mm-hmm.
1226
00:52:37,654 --> 00:52:40,624
-Hey. Hi.
-Hi!
1227
00:52:40,757 --> 00:52:41,558
Oh.
1228
00:52:41,558 --> 00:52:44,027
-I'm so glad you made it.
-Congratulations.
1229
00:52:44,027 --> 00:52:46,429
Thanks. Thanks.
Everybody's here.
1230
00:52:46,429 --> 00:52:47,831
-Times is here.
-Oh.
1231
00:52:47,831 --> 00:52:49,399
L.A. Weekly. Yeah.
1232
00:52:49,399 --> 00:52:50,867
-Wow, well.
-Yeah.
1233
00:52:50,867 --> 00:52:53,270
Your new art is really amazing,
1234
00:52:53,270 --> 00:52:55,939
-and interesting.
-I know. I know.
1235
00:52:56,006 --> 00:52:58,141
EVA: There's--
there's a lot happening...
1236
00:52:58,141 --> 00:53:00,343
-It's powerful stuff.
-...with all of it.
1237
00:53:00,343 --> 00:53:02,946
I didn't get your smile
exactly right, But,
1238
00:53:02,946 --> 00:53:05,348
-eh, it's still great.
-[CHUCKLES]
1239
00:53:05,348 --> 00:53:08,051
Hey. Let's have dinner
on Saturday, huh?
1240
00:53:08,051 --> 00:53:09,186
-Really?
-Yeah.
1241
00:53:09,186 --> 00:53:10,253
-Okay.
-Great.
1242
00:53:10,253 --> 00:53:11,621
-Great.
-Cool. Text you.
1243
00:53:11,621 --> 00:53:12,756
-Okay.
-Okay.
1244
00:53:12,756 --> 00:53:14,424
Yeah, I got to go
talk to some people.
1245
00:53:14,424 --> 00:53:16,660
Oh, okay, sure. You're busy.
1246
00:53:16,660 --> 00:53:19,062
Why is he wearing
that weird hat?
1247
00:53:21,131 --> 00:53:22,299
I don't know.
1248
00:53:22,299 --> 00:53:26,670
[JAZZ PLAYING]
1249
00:53:31,308 --> 00:53:33,009
Somebody fucked
with our system!
1250
00:53:33,009 --> 00:53:34,945
I can't get this image
off the screen!
1251
00:53:34,945 --> 00:53:36,479
I thought we were
on a closed network!
1252
00:53:36,479 --> 00:53:38,582
Someone hacked
into the program!
1253
00:53:38,582 --> 00:53:39,950
Someone with a password!
1254
00:53:39,950 --> 00:53:43,353
Uh, Peter, not to point fingers
or anything...
1255
00:53:43,353 --> 00:53:45,355
Yeah, okay, look,
I'm way ahead of you.
1256
00:53:45,355 --> 00:53:46,890
You're not a fucking detective,
all right?
1257
00:53:46,890 --> 00:53:48,858
-Did you do this?
-I can't even figure out
1258
00:53:48,858 --> 00:53:50,160
how to download
the software updates
1259
00:53:50,160 --> 00:53:51,461
-on my computer.
-That's true.
1260
00:53:51,461 --> 00:53:53,697
She can't fucking download
the software updates
1261
00:53:53,697 --> 00:53:54,397
on her computer.
1262
00:53:54,397 --> 00:53:56,032
-What's your name? Darrell?
-Demarcus.
1263
00:53:56,032 --> 00:53:58,868
-Demarcus, you're fired, dude.
-Come on, man!
1264
00:53:58,868 --> 00:54:00,870
You're fired, and I'm gonna get
a new nerd
1265
00:54:00,870 --> 00:54:02,973
to make this system
that you can't fuck with it.
1266
00:54:02,973 --> 00:54:04,941
Hey, you're the guy
who has "password"
1267
00:54:04,941 --> 00:54:05,909
as his password, man.
1268
00:54:05,909 --> 00:54:08,211
Well, why don't you fucking
broadcast it on Twitter, man?
1269
00:54:08,211 --> 00:54:09,879
You're not supposed
to tell people my password.
1270
00:54:09,879 --> 00:54:12,249
-I have to change it.
-I can do the password.
1271
00:54:12,249 --> 00:54:14,317
You don't need to do it.
I'll do it.
1272
00:54:14,317 --> 00:54:16,453
I'm gonna change it. Shit!
1273
00:54:16,453 --> 00:54:18,188
Oh, come on, man.
1274
00:54:18,188 --> 00:54:19,689
That sucks.
1275
00:54:19,689 --> 00:54:21,391
See you guys later.
1276
00:54:29,799 --> 00:54:31,401
Babe?
1277
00:54:32,035 --> 00:54:35,171
You-- you haven't returned
any of my calls.
1278
00:54:35,338 --> 00:54:37,941
I've been thinking
about what you said.
1279
00:54:39,175 --> 00:54:41,077
Can you please let me in?
1280
00:54:41,344 --> 00:54:44,648
-I really need to talk to you.
-What do you want?
1281
00:54:44,648 --> 00:54:46,983
Can you--
can you please let me in?
1282
00:54:46,983 --> 00:54:48,752
Tell me what you want.
1283
00:54:49,886 --> 00:54:51,321
Please?
1284
00:54:52,956 --> 00:54:53,823
[SIGHS]
1285
00:54:53,823 --> 00:54:55,825
Look, I-- I don't know. I--
1286
00:54:55,825 --> 00:54:58,061
This is really hard for me
to say.
1287
00:54:58,161 --> 00:54:59,896
What?
1288
00:55:00,363 --> 00:55:03,833
I really liked
how you bossed me around.
1289
00:55:04,434 --> 00:55:07,304
You know,
I didn't think I would, but...
1290
00:55:07,504 --> 00:55:08,972
it...
1291
00:55:09,105 --> 00:55:11,074
kind of turned me on.
1292
00:55:11,441 --> 00:55:12,642
Are you serious?
1293
00:55:12,642 --> 00:55:14,611
Yeah, is that really weird?
1294
00:55:15,111 --> 00:55:16,746
Yeah, kinda.
1295
00:55:17,580 --> 00:55:20,717
Can you...
boss me around some more?
1296
00:55:23,853 --> 00:55:25,221
Really?
1297
00:55:25,355 --> 00:55:26,823
Yeah.
1298
00:55:30,593 --> 00:55:35,231
[MUSIC PLAYING]
1299
00:55:39,169 --> 00:55:40,870
Give me ten minutes.
1300
00:55:54,884 --> 00:55:57,253
I want you to do my laundry!
1301
00:55:57,253 --> 00:55:58,688
Wow.
1302
00:55:59,055 --> 00:56:00,457
Now!
1303
00:56:01,524 --> 00:56:03,393
And clean my apartment!
1304
00:56:05,128 --> 00:56:07,197
And then I want you to lick it!
1305
00:56:07,897 --> 00:56:10,166
-All right.
-Crawl!
1306
00:56:16,840 --> 00:56:19,743
[MUSIC PLAYING]
1307
00:56:23,079 --> 00:56:24,180
MARK: Eva.
1308
00:56:24,180 --> 00:56:25,849
-Hey!
-Hi.
1309
00:56:26,149 --> 00:56:28,618
-How are you?
-I'm good.
1310
00:56:29,419 --> 00:56:31,087
Welcome to my restaurant.
1311
00:56:31,087 --> 00:56:32,522
This place is incredible.
1312
00:56:32,522 --> 00:56:35,625
-Thank you. It's true.
-[CHUCKLES]
1313
00:56:35,992 --> 00:56:36,659
Um...
1314
00:56:36,659 --> 00:56:39,596
Rebecca got sick
and couldn't find a sitter,
1315
00:56:39,596 --> 00:56:40,397
so...
1316
00:56:40,397 --> 00:56:43,500
I'd like to introduce you
to my daughters.
1317
00:56:43,500 --> 00:56:45,268
Mary, Melinda...
1318
00:56:45,268 --> 00:56:47,070
-this is Eva.
-Hi.
1319
00:56:47,070 --> 00:56:51,241
-I like your outfit.
-Thank you. I make dresses.
1320
00:56:51,408 --> 00:56:52,842
I like princess dresses.
1321
00:56:52,842 --> 00:56:54,377
I could make you
a princess dress.
1322
00:56:54,377 --> 00:56:56,079
-Would you like that?
-Yes!
1323
00:56:56,079 --> 00:56:57,113
Can I have a dress?
1324
00:56:57,113 --> 00:56:59,482
-Absolutely, sweetie.
-Yes.
1325
00:56:59,482 --> 00:57:03,386
What if you guys come back
to my house after dinner?
1326
00:57:03,386 --> 00:57:05,855
I have lots of dresses.
We could play dress-up.
1327
00:57:05,855 --> 00:57:08,425
'Cause I kind of want to hang
out with these princesses.
1328
00:57:08,425 --> 00:57:10,093
They're pretty cool.
1329
00:57:10,927 --> 00:57:12,295
Mm!
1330
00:57:12,295 --> 00:57:13,863
I'm having...
1331
00:57:13,863 --> 00:57:15,198
a food orgasm right now.
1332
00:57:15,198 --> 00:57:17,033
-Oh, yeah? Good.
-Oh, yeah. I am.
1333
00:57:17,033 --> 00:57:18,735
-[MARK CHUCKLES]
-What's an orgasm?
1334
00:57:18,735 --> 00:57:22,605
-Oh, oops. I'm sorry.
-Um, uh, it's, uh...
1335
00:57:22,739 --> 00:57:23,940
It's happiness.
1336
00:57:23,940 --> 00:57:26,009
-Hey. Right?
-Yeah!
1337
00:57:26,009 --> 00:57:27,110
-Yeah.
-How about some music?
1338
00:57:27,110 --> 00:57:28,812
-Mm-hmm.
-You guys look beautiful!
1339
00:57:28,812 --> 00:57:30,079
Let's do a fashion show.
1340
00:57:30,079 --> 00:57:32,449
Oh, now that sounds like fun,
right, girls?
1341
00:57:32,449 --> 00:57:33,483
-Yeah.
-We're gonna have
1342
00:57:33,483 --> 00:57:35,618
a little catwalk.
What do you say?
1343
00:57:35,618 --> 00:57:38,021
-Yes!
-[MUSIC PLAYING]
1344
00:57:38,755 --> 00:57:40,089
[MARK CHUCKLING]
1345
00:57:40,089 --> 00:57:41,791
Ready? Here we go.
1346
00:57:42,058 --> 00:57:44,794
♪ Combination must be
All right ♪
1347
00:57:44,794 --> 00:57:46,529
[MARK LAUGHING]
1348
00:57:46,596 --> 00:57:48,164
[GIRLS GIGGLING]
1349
00:57:49,365 --> 00:57:52,602
♪ I feel it ♪
1350
00:57:52,769 --> 00:57:53,903
EVA: Go, big sister.
1351
00:57:53,903 --> 00:57:55,839
♪ I feel it ♪
1352
00:57:55,839 --> 00:57:58,741
Yay! Little miss.
Go do your thing!
1353
00:57:58,741 --> 00:57:59,943
Oh, my goodness.
Oh, my goodness.
1354
00:57:59,943 --> 00:58:01,911
-MELINDA: Daddy, you got to go!
-Yes, Daddy!
1355
00:58:01,911 --> 00:58:04,447
Oh, I don't think I need
to do that, no.
1356
00:58:04,447 --> 00:58:05,281
Oh, I think you need to.
1357
00:58:05,281 --> 00:58:09,018
What is that? It looks like
a violent shoulder move.
1358
00:58:09,018 --> 00:58:10,487
[ALL LAUGHING]
1359
00:58:10,487 --> 00:58:12,021
MARY: Yay!
1360
00:58:12,155 --> 00:58:15,425
-Yeah!
-Yeah!
1361
00:58:15,992 --> 00:58:17,727
Let's go. Let's do it again.
1362
00:58:17,727 --> 00:58:20,763
Meow. Freestyle.
I'm a kitty cat.
1363
00:58:20,763 --> 00:58:22,465
Oh! Meow! Meow!
1364
00:58:22,465 --> 00:58:23,800
I'm a kitty. Work, work, work!
1365
00:58:23,800 --> 00:58:28,004
-♪ I feel it ♪
-♪ Oh, I feel it ♪
1366
00:58:28,004 --> 00:58:31,941
-♪ Oh, I feel it ♪
-♪ I feel it ♪
1367
00:58:31,941 --> 00:58:36,479
♪ Oh, I feel love ♪
1368
00:58:38,181 --> 00:58:39,682
Call me...
1369
00:58:40,116 --> 00:58:41,684
[SIGHS]
1370
00:58:46,489 --> 00:58:48,658
[CHEERING]
1371
00:58:48,658 --> 00:58:51,160
[MUSIC PLAYING]
1372
00:58:51,895 --> 00:58:54,931
-Hello?
-Hi. It's me.
1373
00:58:54,931 --> 00:58:56,165
Hi.
1374
00:58:56,165 --> 00:58:57,200
Hey, what are you doing?
1375
00:58:57,200 --> 00:58:59,836
I'm just, uh, having
a few people over, yeah?
1376
00:58:59,836 --> 00:59:01,437
Uh, you want to come by?
1377
00:59:01,437 --> 00:59:03,139
Feel the music!
1378
00:59:03,239 --> 00:59:03,840
Yeah.
1379
00:59:03,840 --> 00:59:06,576
-FREEDOM: Yeah, all right.
-Okay, see you soon.
1380
00:59:06,576 --> 00:59:08,778
[MUSIC PLAYING]
1381
00:59:08,778 --> 00:59:11,347
[SNIFFING]
1382
00:59:11,414 --> 00:59:12,749
[SIGHS]
1383
00:59:18,488 --> 00:59:20,223
FREEDOM: Hey! [CHUCKLES]
1384
00:59:21,324 --> 00:59:24,260
-MAN: One for everybody!
-FREEDOM: Oh!
1385
00:59:25,895 --> 00:59:27,397
You in for the next round?
Yeah?
1386
00:59:27,397 --> 00:59:29,766
You-- I know you want one.
1387
00:59:29,766 --> 00:59:31,234
[SIGHS]
1388
00:59:32,969 --> 00:59:35,805
-HONEY: Mm.
-FREEDOM: Mm-hmm.
1389
00:59:35,805 --> 00:59:37,907
Oh, it's so good to see you.
1390
00:59:37,907 --> 00:59:39,776
I'm so glad you called.
[CHUCKLES]
1391
00:59:39,776 --> 00:59:41,077
-You want a bump?
-Oh, I'm sorry.
1392
00:59:41,077 --> 00:59:44,247
I don't do drugs.
I'm a lightweight. [CHUCKLES]
1393
00:59:44,247 --> 00:59:45,515
[SNIFFING]
1394
00:59:45,515 --> 00:59:48,051
-Do you want to dance, yeah?
-HONEY: Sure.
1395
00:59:48,051 --> 00:59:49,752
Yeah. [CHUCKLES]
1396
00:59:50,820 --> 00:59:53,756
Hey. I took too much
of this tonight. You want some?
1397
00:59:53,756 --> 00:59:56,793
-Yeah, thank you. Yeah.
-Yeah. Hey!
1398
00:59:56,793 --> 00:59:57,627
Mm. Try that?
1399
00:59:57,627 --> 00:59:59,762
-No, thanks. [CHUCKLES]
-No?
1400
01:00:00,330 --> 01:00:02,799
Ugh! [CHUCKLES]
1401
01:00:03,766 --> 01:00:05,768
You know, I've been thinking
about you a lot.
1402
01:00:05,768 --> 01:00:07,370
-You have?
-Yeah.
1403
01:00:07,370 --> 01:00:08,638
Why haven't you called?
1404
01:00:08,638 --> 01:00:11,074
Well, look in my eyes.
Tell me what I'm thinking.
1405
01:00:11,074 --> 01:00:13,543
[CHUCKLES] Um, I don't know.
1406
01:00:13,543 --> 01:00:15,645
No, no! [CHUCKLES]
1407
01:00:16,879 --> 01:00:19,315
Talk to me.
How do you feel?
1408
01:00:20,483 --> 01:00:23,086
-I like you.
-You do?
1409
01:00:23,152 --> 01:00:24,621
Yeah.
1410
01:00:24,887 --> 01:00:26,556
I love you.
1411
01:00:26,656 --> 01:00:27,624
[GASPS]
1412
01:00:27,624 --> 01:00:29,158
I love you, yeah?
1413
01:00:29,158 --> 01:00:31,861
Don't you know that?
Can't you tell?
1414
01:00:31,961 --> 01:00:34,297
Sometimes I can't talk
unless I'm wasted.
1415
01:00:34,297 --> 01:00:35,798
Yeah, I get scared.
1416
01:00:35,798 --> 01:00:38,301
I'm gonna talk to you now,
yeah?
1417
01:00:38,434 --> 01:00:39,969
I love you.
1418
01:00:40,737 --> 01:00:42,872
Oh, I love you. [CHUCKLES]
1419
01:00:42,872 --> 01:00:45,975
Do you see it in my eyes?
Yeah, can you feel it?
1420
01:00:45,975 --> 01:00:49,245
I love you.
1421
01:00:49,245 --> 01:00:54,150
-[CHUCKLES] I love you.
-I love you. Mm. Mm.
1422
01:00:56,219 --> 01:00:59,222
I love you!
1423
01:00:59,222 --> 01:01:01,224
-I love you!
-I love--
1424
01:01:01,224 --> 01:01:04,427
[HONEY MOANING]
1425
01:01:04,427 --> 01:01:07,263
[MUSIC PLAYING]
1426
01:01:08,798 --> 01:01:10,800
Oh, whoa.
1427
01:01:10,933 --> 01:01:13,503
My heart's beating really fast.
1428
01:01:14,303 --> 01:01:16,739
-Have you got a Valium?
-No.
1429
01:01:16,739 --> 01:01:18,875
[PANTING] Xanax?
1430
01:01:19,876 --> 01:01:21,678
-NyQuil?
-No.
1431
01:01:21,678 --> 01:01:22,812
[PANTING]
1432
01:01:22,812 --> 01:01:25,815
No, it's all right. I'll just
talk to my heart, yeah?
1433
01:01:25,815 --> 01:01:28,351
I'll make it come down, yeah.
[BREATHING HEAVILY]
1434
01:01:28,351 --> 01:01:29,752
Do you want me
to turn the music off?
1435
01:01:29,752 --> 01:01:31,854
No, no, no, it's fine.
No, I can...
1436
01:01:31,854 --> 01:01:33,990
I can do it. Yeah,
I can make it.
1437
01:01:33,990 --> 01:01:35,825
Make it calm down.
1438
01:01:36,893 --> 01:01:40,396
-Do you want to have sex?
-Whoa, whoa, whoa, babe, babe.
1439
01:01:40,396 --> 01:01:42,365
Sorry. That hurts, yeah?
1440
01:01:42,765 --> 01:01:45,501
Oh. [PANTING]
1441
01:01:45,702 --> 01:01:47,970
I've never felt
that way before...
1442
01:01:47,970 --> 01:01:50,606
-[PANTING]
-the way you made me feel.
1443
01:01:50,606 --> 01:01:52,008
Sex is beautiful.
1444
01:01:52,008 --> 01:01:54,243
I didn't have to feel bad
about it.
1445
01:01:54,243 --> 01:01:55,712
Okay.
1446
01:01:55,912 --> 01:01:58,314
I felt really good
about myself.
1447
01:01:58,314 --> 01:01:59,949
No, that's great, babe, but...
1448
01:01:59,949 --> 01:02:02,819
I don't think
I can have sex right now.
1449
01:02:02,819 --> 01:02:04,821
Oh, God, I hope
I don't have to go
1450
01:02:04,821 --> 01:02:06,823
to the emergency room again.
1451
01:02:06,823 --> 01:02:08,524
Oh, my God!
1452
01:02:08,725 --> 01:02:10,793
CANDY: And then I made him
lick it!
1453
01:02:10,793 --> 01:02:12,128
And he did the whole alphabet
1454
01:02:12,128 --> 01:02:14,197
for 45 minutes.
I looked at the clock.
1455
01:02:14,197 --> 01:02:15,998
-What?
-Oh, my God!
1456
01:02:15,998 --> 01:02:16,899
CANDY: I know!
1457
01:02:16,899 --> 01:02:19,135
And then I made him
do my laundry.
1458
01:02:19,135 --> 01:02:20,770
Now I have the power.
1459
01:02:20,770 --> 01:02:23,673
Did you ask him
if he's seeing the other girls?
1460
01:02:23,673 --> 01:02:27,176
Oh, God! No, I forgot! Ugh!
1461
01:02:27,176 --> 01:02:29,378
Well, maybe your power
isn't very powerful,
1462
01:02:29,378 --> 01:02:30,213
because you got him off,
1463
01:02:30,213 --> 01:02:31,914
and you didn't get
what you wanted.
1464
01:02:31,914 --> 01:02:33,716
CANDY: My power's very powerful.
1465
01:02:33,716 --> 01:02:35,818
Why don't you ask
for what you want?
1466
01:02:35,818 --> 01:02:39,155
[SIGHS] I try to talk to him,
but it's, like...
1467
01:02:41,090 --> 01:02:43,659
Ah! Nothing comes out.
1468
01:02:43,760 --> 01:02:44,827
What is wrong with me?
1469
01:02:44,827 --> 01:02:48,431
I mean, I can talk to you guys,
but I cannot talk to him.
1470
01:02:48,431 --> 01:02:50,633
It's like when I'm around him,
I just...
1471
01:02:50,633 --> 01:02:53,069
He makes me so nervous
that I'm not myself.
1472
01:02:53,069 --> 01:02:54,637
I'm like a unicorn.
1473
01:02:54,637 --> 01:02:56,606
Everyone knows
you can't see a unicorn
1474
01:02:56,606 --> 01:02:58,508
unless you believe in them.
1475
01:02:58,508 --> 01:03:01,410
[SOBBING]
It's like he can't see how...
1476
01:03:01,410 --> 01:03:03,546
magic I really am.
1477
01:03:03,546 --> 01:03:04,947
Oh!
1478
01:03:05,615 --> 01:03:08,484
Everyone can see it.
It's super obvious.
1479
01:03:08,484 --> 01:03:10,286
Yeah.
1480
01:03:12,488 --> 01:03:15,591
What if I ask him
for what I want...
1481
01:03:16,926 --> 01:03:18,761
and he leaves me?
1482
01:03:19,262 --> 01:03:20,263
You should try.
1483
01:03:20,263 --> 01:03:22,598
Sometimes I don't even know
what I want.
1484
01:03:22,598 --> 01:03:25,635
I think you're being too hard
on yourself.
1485
01:03:25,902 --> 01:03:28,404
Okay,
what candle did you bring?
1486
01:03:29,739 --> 01:03:31,407
The white candle.
1487
01:03:32,608 --> 01:03:34,143
For healing.
1488
01:03:35,244 --> 01:03:36,646
We all say...
1489
01:03:36,646 --> 01:03:38,681
"I wish
to remove anything negative
1490
01:03:38,681 --> 01:03:40,116
from my life."
1491
01:03:40,116 --> 01:03:42,952
ALL: I wish
to remove anything negative
1492
01:03:42,952 --> 01:03:44,554
from my life.
1493
01:03:44,654 --> 01:03:46,656
And so mote it be.
1494
01:03:49,091 --> 01:03:54,630
[MUSIC PLAYING]
1495
01:03:57,366 --> 01:03:59,602
Oh, and I wish for a unicorn.
1496
01:03:59,602 --> 01:04:01,070
[CHUCKLES]
1497
01:04:01,070 --> 01:04:03,239
Are you dating other women?
1498
01:04:03,239 --> 01:04:05,675
Why are you talking
in that weird voice?
1499
01:04:05,675 --> 01:04:06,676
I'm trying to sound powerful.
1500
01:04:06,676 --> 01:04:08,778
I thought that's what
turned you on last time.
1501
01:04:08,778 --> 01:04:10,146
Yeah, it turned me on
1502
01:04:10,146 --> 01:04:11,380
that you asked
for what you wanted.
1503
01:04:11,380 --> 01:04:12,982
I just never knew
what you were thinking before
1504
01:04:12,982 --> 01:04:14,951
because you just always agreed
with everything I said.
1505
01:04:14,951 --> 01:04:17,186
Well, I don't agree
with a lot of things you say!
1506
01:04:17,186 --> 01:04:19,322
Maybe listen to me for once!
1507
01:04:19,322 --> 01:04:19,922
Okay.
1508
01:04:19,922 --> 01:04:22,792
Stop dating other women!
Are you dating other women?
1509
01:04:22,792 --> 01:04:26,529
Well, there are two other women
that I sometimes see.
1510
01:04:28,297 --> 01:04:30,233
Pick me and only me.
1511
01:04:32,001 --> 01:04:33,736
I'll think about it.
1512
01:04:34,604 --> 01:04:36,772
And then she uncovers
her true erotic nature
1513
01:04:36,772 --> 01:04:38,207
and defeats the killer
inside herself,
1514
01:04:38,207 --> 01:04:41,477
which is really
her own self-limiting beliefs.
1515
01:04:41,477 --> 01:04:43,479
Wow, that sounds like
a real blockbuster.
1516
01:04:43,479 --> 01:04:44,480
Well, actually, I-- I do think
1517
01:04:44,480 --> 01:04:45,948
it has potential to be
a real blockbuster,
1518
01:04:45,948 --> 01:04:49,151
because what we've done here
is we've-- we've satisfied
1519
01:04:49,151 --> 01:04:49,986
the demands of the genre
1520
01:04:49,986 --> 01:04:53,422
while also creating
something truly original.
1521
01:04:53,723 --> 01:04:54,924
Oh, sorry, man.
I almost fell asleep
1522
01:04:54,924 --> 01:04:57,126
with what you're saying,
'cause it's boring as shit.
1523
01:04:57,126 --> 01:04:58,427
Hey, do you want to have sex
in the bathroom,
1524
01:04:58,427 --> 01:05:01,163
or do you want to reject me
like my own mother did, huh?
1525
01:05:01,163 --> 01:05:02,365
Why did you break up
with me? Huh?
1526
01:05:02,365 --> 01:05:04,600
Why did you break up with me?
All I wanted to do was love you,
1527
01:05:04,600 --> 01:05:07,370
and mentor you, and help you
achieve your true potential.
1528
01:05:07,370 --> 01:05:09,105
I'm sorry.
I don't know what to say.
1529
01:05:09,105 --> 01:05:10,172
I hate
that you're not into me.
1530
01:05:10,172 --> 01:05:11,440
It makes me so much more
attracted to you.
1531
01:05:11,440 --> 01:05:13,175
And I thought you were
desperate and too old
1532
01:05:13,175 --> 01:05:14,777
to bear children
without birth defects.
1533
01:05:14,777 --> 01:05:16,512
Oh, that's so out of line.
1534
01:05:16,512 --> 01:05:17,947
I'm so relieved
that you find me attractive,
1535
01:05:17,947 --> 01:05:20,149
but when can Linda read
the script that we wrote?
1536
01:05:20,149 --> 01:05:23,085
I don't want you speaking
directly to Linda anymore,
1537
01:05:23,085 --> 01:05:25,655
okay? And here's another piece
of advice for you,
1538
01:05:25,655 --> 01:05:27,523
uh, your boobs are too big,
okay?
1539
01:05:27,523 --> 01:05:28,824
They're too big
and they're flopping around,
1540
01:05:28,824 --> 01:05:30,259
and they make you look
like a bimbo, all right?
1541
01:05:30,259 --> 01:05:33,329
You look like a dummy.
That's why your directing career
1542
01:05:33,329 --> 01:05:34,497
hasn't gotten off the ground
yet,
1543
01:05:34,497 --> 01:05:35,831
'cause you look
like a big-boobied dummy.
1544
01:05:35,831 --> 01:05:38,401
Well, that's great advice.
Should I cut my boobs off
1545
01:05:38,401 --> 01:05:39,568
-so I can seem smarter?
-No,
1546
01:05:39,568 --> 01:05:42,038
you shouldn't cut
your boobs off, okay?
1547
01:05:42,038 --> 01:05:42,972
But what you could do is,
1548
01:05:42,972 --> 01:05:44,540
you could mash them down
a little bit. You could take--
1549
01:05:44,540 --> 01:05:48,377
You know what you could do?
You could Saran Wrap them, okay?
1550
01:05:48,377 --> 01:05:50,780
I do it to my dick
when I'm on vacation in France.
1551
01:05:50,780 --> 01:05:53,382
I got a big dick
and it fucking goes right here
1552
01:05:53,382 --> 01:05:55,117
and I tape it here.
1553
01:05:57,787 --> 01:06:01,824
My bodacious ta-tas honor me
and they honor you.
1554
01:06:01,824 --> 01:06:03,259
Should I be taking notes
on some of this stuff
1555
01:06:03,259 --> 01:06:05,594
for the sexual-harassment
lawsuit we're all going to?
1556
01:06:05,594 --> 01:06:09,765
Hey, don't make me load
my emotional gun, okay, dude?
1557
01:06:09,765 --> 01:06:10,599
'Cause I'm one step away
1558
01:06:10,599 --> 01:06:13,302
from loading this emotional gun,
dude.
1559
01:06:13,636 --> 01:06:15,104
Cool.
1560
01:06:16,706 --> 01:06:18,941
That dress looks
so great on you.
1561
01:06:18,941 --> 01:06:20,343
Why are you going out
with Darren again?
1562
01:06:20,343 --> 01:06:22,144
HONEY: You should be going out
with the licker. I mean,
1563
01:06:22,144 --> 01:06:24,213
there's no contest.
You either get licked
1564
01:06:24,213 --> 01:06:25,181
or you don't.
1565
01:06:25,181 --> 01:06:27,516
[SIGHS]
I was married to Darren
1566
01:06:27,516 --> 01:06:28,651
for 14 years.
1567
01:06:28,651 --> 01:06:30,052
I have to give him
another chance.
1568
01:06:30,052 --> 01:06:33,356
Yeah, you don't want him
to miss out on another chance
1569
01:06:33,356 --> 01:06:34,991
of not going down on you again.
1570
01:06:34,991 --> 01:06:37,259
Okay, I just texted Mark
and I made a date tonight,
1571
01:06:37,259 --> 01:06:39,028
-10:00 p.m., Butchers & Barbers.
-Oh, no! No!
1572
01:06:39,028 --> 01:06:41,097
Then I said, "Would you lick me
all over after?"
1573
01:06:41,097 --> 01:06:42,231
-No!
-No, I didn't say that.
1574
01:06:42,231 --> 01:06:43,833
-Give it to me.
-We must enact
1575
01:06:43,833 --> 01:06:44,633
the good-guy pact.
1576
01:06:44,633 --> 01:06:46,736
-Give it to me.
-[DOORBELL RINGING]
1577
01:06:46,736 --> 01:06:49,071
[SQUEALING]
1578
01:06:52,274 --> 01:06:53,976
[EXHALING]
1579
01:06:56,379 --> 01:06:57,980
[SIGHS]
1580
01:06:58,481 --> 01:06:59,749
Oh, hi, babe.
1581
01:06:59,749 --> 01:07:02,118
-Hey!
-Hey. Good to see you.
1582
01:07:02,118 --> 01:07:03,552
-Yeah.
-[GROANS]
1583
01:07:03,552 --> 01:07:06,255
-Glad you're feeling better.
-Thanks.
1584
01:07:07,323 --> 01:07:10,159
-Hey, I'm Honey.
-And I'm Candy.
1585
01:07:10,159 --> 01:07:11,594
Oh.
1586
01:07:11,594 --> 01:07:12,628
All kinds of lozenges.
1587
01:07:12,628 --> 01:07:14,497
Cool. I thought
it was just gonna be us tonight.
1588
01:07:14,497 --> 01:07:16,132
Yeah. Oh, of course.
Of course.
1589
01:07:16,132 --> 01:07:18,534
Um, I can take it from here.
1590
01:07:19,602 --> 01:07:20,669
Don't fuck with her.
1591
01:07:20,669 --> 01:07:23,039
Okay. So it's time to go.
1592
01:07:23,039 --> 01:07:26,575
Um, I'll talk to you guys later.
Let's go.
1593
01:07:26,675 --> 01:07:29,211
Don't forget your date tonight
at ten.
1594
01:07:31,647 --> 01:07:32,748
You have a date?
1595
01:07:32,748 --> 01:07:33,849
-Uh-
-Tonight?
1596
01:07:33,849 --> 01:07:36,585
Yes. She has a date.
1597
01:07:38,120 --> 01:07:39,889
With who? [CHUCKLES]
1598
01:07:39,955 --> 01:07:41,557
Not helping.
1599
01:07:41,657 --> 01:07:43,225
Okay, come on.
1600
01:07:44,660 --> 01:07:46,128
So...
1601
01:07:46,662 --> 01:07:48,697
I don't care,
but who are you dating?
1602
01:07:48,697 --> 01:07:50,633
-Uh, I'm not. I'm just--
-I don't care.
1603
01:07:50,633 --> 01:07:51,667
-I really don't care.
-Okay,
1604
01:07:51,667 --> 01:07:54,103
well, I might see Mark later,
because I-- I just,
1605
01:07:54,103 --> 01:07:55,738
you know, ran into him
the other day.
1606
01:07:55,738 --> 01:07:58,207
-You're dating my friend Mark?
-No, I'm not dating him.
1607
01:07:58,207 --> 01:08:01,077
-I said I don't care.
-We-- we hung out a little bit.
1608
01:08:01,077 --> 01:08:03,112
-I don't care.
-Okay.
1609
01:08:03,112 --> 01:08:04,713
I don't care.
1610
01:08:06,082 --> 01:08:08,818
-Did you fuck Mark?
-What?
1611
01:08:08,918 --> 01:08:11,287
No. I mean, come on.
1612
01:08:11,287 --> 01:08:13,689
-Yes, I did. Okay.
-Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
1613
01:08:13,689 --> 01:08:15,324
Okay, I fucked Mark!
It's none of your business!
1614
01:08:15,324 --> 01:08:16,525
You fucked my friend!
How could--
1615
01:08:16,525 --> 01:08:18,494
You fucked my friend!
Of course that's my business!
1616
01:08:18,494 --> 01:08:19,795
Forget it.
Forget I mentioned it.
1617
01:08:19,795 --> 01:08:20,930
How could I forget that?
We got--
1618
01:08:20,930 --> 01:08:23,232
He's my friend.
We go on vacations together.
1619
01:08:23,232 --> 01:08:24,266
We went biking in Tuscany!
1620
01:08:24,266 --> 01:08:27,103
That was a horrible trip.
Just forget it, okay?
1621
01:08:27,103 --> 01:08:28,404
I can't forget
that you fucked my friend.
1622
01:08:28,404 --> 01:08:31,407
I don't care about Mark.
I love you. I love you, honey.
1623
01:08:31,407 --> 01:08:32,842
I love you.
1624
01:08:32,842 --> 01:08:34,310
Okay?
1625
01:08:35,911 --> 01:08:37,746
-Where do you want to go?
-[SIGHS]
1626
01:08:37,746 --> 01:08:39,882
I don't care.
Where do you want to go?
1627
01:08:39,882 --> 01:08:40,850
We'll go to Butchers & Barbers.
1628
01:08:40,850 --> 01:08:42,918
-No, we are not! Stop it.
-Get in. Get in.
1629
01:08:42,918 --> 01:08:44,053
-Don't be a child.
-That's exactly
1630
01:08:44,053 --> 01:08:45,354
-where we're going.
-Do not be a child.
1631
01:08:45,354 --> 01:08:46,589
-I'm not being a child
-Yes, you are.
1632
01:08:46,589 --> 01:08:48,124
I'm being
an extremely angry adult!
1633
01:08:48,124 --> 01:08:49,658
-All right.
-That's a huge difference!
1634
01:08:49,658 --> 01:08:52,695
Get it out here,
'cause we're not going there!
1635
01:08:52,695 --> 01:08:54,964
-Are you gonna open my door?
-Of course I am.
1636
01:08:54,964 --> 01:08:56,098
Thank you.
1637
01:08:56,098 --> 01:08:58,834
-DARREN: Oh, Mark?
-EVA: Darren.
1638
01:08:58,834 --> 01:09:01,804
-DARREN: Mark!
-Darren. Darren.
1639
01:09:02,304 --> 01:09:05,040
I always knew
you wanted to fuck my wife.
1640
01:09:05,608 --> 01:09:08,544
Whoa, uh, we're there. Uh...
1641
01:09:09,778 --> 01:09:10,913
You're right.
1642
01:09:10,913 --> 01:09:12,481
Oh, God. Um...
1643
01:09:12,481 --> 01:09:14,150
Just-- just deny it at least!
1644
01:09:14,150 --> 01:09:16,519
At least deny it
for appearances!
1645
01:09:16,519 --> 01:09:18,487
For crying out loud!
1646
01:09:18,487 --> 01:09:20,956
Guess what. Is this expensive?
1647
01:09:20,956 --> 01:09:22,958
Mark! Oh, my God!
1648
01:09:22,958 --> 01:09:24,760
How do you like me now? Huh?
1649
01:09:24,760 --> 01:09:25,861
-Stop it!
-Huh?
1650
01:09:25,861 --> 01:09:27,997
-Really?
-Yeah! Yeah, really!
1651
01:09:28,330 --> 01:09:29,398
-Shin kicks?
-DARREN: Yeah.
1652
01:09:29,398 --> 01:09:31,634
-Stop it!
-You know I took kung fu?
1653
01:09:31,634 --> 01:09:32,468
-Okay.
-Huh?
1654
01:09:32,468 --> 01:09:34,370
-He took, like, two karate--
-[DARREN SCREAMS]
1655
01:09:34,370 --> 01:09:36,038
Oh, my God.
1656
01:09:36,605 --> 01:09:39,208
Oh, my God, Darren! Stop it!
1657
01:09:39,208 --> 01:09:40,576
He drank a Red Bull in the car.
1658
01:09:40,576 --> 01:09:42,244
He's really sensitive
to caffeine.
1659
01:09:42,244 --> 01:09:44,213
-DARREN: Time out, time out!
-You're gonna hurt yourself.
1660
01:09:44,213 --> 01:09:47,116
-EVA: I'm gonna pull up the car.
-Oh, wow. Big man, huh?
1661
01:09:47,116 --> 01:09:49,552
-Settle down.
-Big man with the restaurant
1662
01:09:49,552 --> 01:09:50,553
and the washboard face.
1663
01:09:50,553 --> 01:09:52,688
Sensei Doug
would be horrified.
1664
01:09:52,688 --> 01:09:54,190
Guess what.
1665
01:09:54,190 --> 01:09:55,057
Ask her who she wants.
1666
01:09:55,057 --> 01:09:56,926
-Oh, I'm not doing that.
-No, ask her who she wants.
1667
01:09:56,926 --> 01:09:59,995
-Who do you want?
-I am not gonna answer that.
1668
01:09:59,995 --> 01:10:02,498
DARREN: You have to
1669
01:10:02,598 --> 01:10:04,200
choose. This...
1670
01:10:04,533 --> 01:10:06,068
or "Thor."
1671
01:10:07,970 --> 01:10:09,605
[DARREN SIGHS]
1672
01:10:10,973 --> 01:10:13,609
[MUSIC PLAYING]
1673
01:10:18,914 --> 01:10:20,816
-Hey.
-Hey. [CHUCKLES]
1674
01:10:20,950 --> 01:10:24,253
You came.
I'm glad you called me back.
1675
01:10:25,487 --> 01:10:26,855
I missed you.
1676
01:10:26,855 --> 01:10:29,959
-You look really beautiful.
-Thank you.
1677
01:10:29,959 --> 01:10:33,362
Have you thought
more about monogamy?
1678
01:10:33,429 --> 01:10:37,266
Ah, you really love that word.
Can we talk about that later?
1679
01:10:37,266 --> 01:10:39,235
I mean, this is
a really important party.
1680
01:10:39,235 --> 01:10:42,571
-I want to talk about it now.
-[SIGHS]
1681
01:10:42,571 --> 01:10:44,173
That's...
1682
01:10:44,273 --> 01:10:45,407
Oh.
1683
01:10:45,407 --> 01:10:46,442
That's Steve Evans.
1684
01:10:46,442 --> 01:10:49,745
That's the guy that picks
all the, uh, the TED speakers.
1685
01:10:49,745 --> 01:10:51,580
-[SIGHS]
-I got to talk to him.
1686
01:10:51,580 --> 01:10:53,782
-Now?
-Yeah, come on.
1687
01:10:59,955 --> 01:11:04,193
[CHUCKLES]
Steve. Hey, how are you, man?
1688
01:11:04,193 --> 01:11:04,960
Daniel Peters,
1689
01:11:04,960 --> 01:11:07,563
-from the-- from the emails.
-From the emails.
1690
01:11:07,563 --> 01:11:08,464
-Yeah!
-Yeah!
1691
01:11:08,464 --> 01:11:09,965
-[CHUCKLES] Isn't that great?
-Yeah.
1692
01:11:09,965 --> 01:11:13,402
We got to get together, man.
You know, we've been, uh...
1693
01:11:15,104 --> 01:11:16,505
Oh, this is Candy.
1694
01:11:16,505 --> 01:11:17,406
Hi.
1695
01:11:17,406 --> 01:11:19,608
-Hey.
-Is this your girlfriend?
1696
01:11:19,608 --> 01:11:20,843
-No!
-Yeah.
1697
01:11:20,843 --> 01:11:21,644
I'm a free agent.
1698
01:11:21,644 --> 01:11:23,812
I'm interested in making lots
of sexual connections,
1699
01:11:23,812 --> 01:11:26,515
because I can't be tied down
by monogamy.
1700
01:11:26,515 --> 01:11:28,751
-[DANIEL CHUCKLES]
-Really?
1701
01:11:29,351 --> 01:11:30,953
Interesting.
1702
01:11:31,020 --> 01:11:32,288
What do you do, Candy?
1703
01:11:32,288 --> 01:11:36,625
I study the significance
of ritual,
1704
01:11:36,625 --> 01:11:38,193
and also I hate monogamy!
1705
01:11:38,193 --> 01:11:40,963
[CHUCKLES] Give me
some casual sex, please!
1706
01:11:40,963 --> 01:11:42,564
[LAUGHING] Me, too!
1707
01:11:42,564 --> 01:11:43,966
[LAUGHING] Yeah, yeah,
that's great.
1708
01:11:43,966 --> 01:11:46,835
-Yeah, that's fun.
-STEVEN: Oh, Daniel, you have...
1709
01:11:46,902 --> 01:11:48,237
fascinating friends.
1710
01:11:48,237 --> 01:11:50,205
Well, she's--
It's more than a friend,
1711
01:11:50,205 --> 01:11:51,040
-so--
-Am I?
1712
01:11:51,040 --> 01:11:53,542
I would love to learn more,
uh, about this.
1713
01:11:53,542 --> 01:11:55,477
Can I...
Could I get your number?
1714
01:11:55,477 --> 01:11:57,579
-Sure, Steve.
-Hang on a minute.
1715
01:11:57,579 --> 01:11:58,881
-Listen--
-It's good. I got my phone.
1716
01:11:58,881 --> 01:12:00,416
-I can connect you.
-I got my phone. It's good.
1717
01:12:00,416 --> 01:12:02,918
DANIEL: I can probably connect
you guys on an email.
1718
01:12:02,918 --> 01:12:04,119
Just type it in yourself?
1719
01:12:04,119 --> 01:12:05,954
And is it Candy
with an I or a Y?
1720
01:12:05,954 --> 01:12:07,856
-With a Y.
-Oh, why not?
1721
01:12:07,856 --> 01:12:11,393
Oh. Why-- why would it be
with an I, you know?
1722
01:12:11,393 --> 01:12:12,628
PETER: You guys
are all handsome guys.
1723
01:12:12,628 --> 01:12:14,063
You know what I'm talking about.
It's the fast-paced
1724
01:12:14,063 --> 01:12:15,764
Hollywood lifestyle.
You know how many girls
1725
01:12:15,764 --> 01:12:17,766
I've had sex with? 21.
1726
01:12:17,766 --> 01:12:18,767
And I'm only 35.
1727
01:12:18,767 --> 01:12:19,702
And I've eaten 12 pussies,
1728
01:12:19,702 --> 01:12:22,504
most of them
on the girls I've fucked. Hey!
1729
01:12:22,638 --> 01:12:23,739
HONEY: Hey.
1730
01:12:23,739 --> 01:12:24,973
-[CLEARS THROAT]
-I got your text.
1731
01:12:24,973 --> 01:12:26,909
PETER: One second, guys.
I'll be right back.
1732
01:12:26,909 --> 01:12:29,411
Follow me. I got
to piss out of my cock.
1733
01:12:29,411 --> 01:12:30,346
Did Linda read my script?
1734
01:12:30,346 --> 01:12:33,148
Uh, yeah, she agreed
with a few things about it,
1735
01:12:33,148 --> 01:12:35,317
so, uh, I got rid of her.
1736
01:12:35,517 --> 01:12:37,019
You got rid of her?
1737
01:12:37,019 --> 01:12:38,354
Yeah. And, uh, it turns out
1738
01:12:38,354 --> 01:12:40,022
I got some new financiers
for the movie,
1739
01:12:40,022 --> 01:12:42,624
so it doesn't matter
what Linda thinks.
1740
01:12:43,092 --> 01:12:44,626
Oh, plus...
1741
01:12:44,626 --> 01:12:46,295
you're fired.
1742
01:12:47,496 --> 01:12:48,464
Well, great, 'cause I quit.
1743
01:12:48,464 --> 01:12:50,265
And I'm gonna write
my own movie about a woman
1744
01:12:50,265 --> 01:12:53,902
having a religious orgasm.
And no one stabs her in the ass.
1745
01:12:53,902 --> 01:12:56,038
First of all, you can't quit
after I fire you, so...
1746
01:12:56,038 --> 01:12:58,374
A person can be smart
and have big boobs.
1747
01:12:58,374 --> 01:13:00,042
And people are gonna
watch my movie
1748
01:13:00,042 --> 01:13:02,211
and people are gonna love it!
1749
01:13:02,878 --> 01:13:05,447
No one respects you,
big boobs.
1750
01:13:05,514 --> 01:13:06,949
Uh...
1751
01:13:07,950 --> 01:13:10,386
You know,
I used to want to be you.
1752
01:13:10,452 --> 01:13:13,155
But all the success in the world
doesn't make you happy,
1753
01:13:13,155 --> 01:13:14,556
does it?
1754
01:13:16,258 --> 01:13:18,994
I have friends
and you don't have any friends,
1755
01:13:18,994 --> 01:13:20,596
and I'm happy.
1756
01:13:21,997 --> 01:13:24,466
Yeah, I guess, you know what,
maybe I'm not so happy
1757
01:13:24,466 --> 01:13:26,034
in my life.
1758
01:13:27,436 --> 01:13:29,204
Maybe if we had sex
in this bathroom,
1759
01:13:29,204 --> 01:13:30,172
I might be happy about that,
1760
01:13:30,172 --> 01:13:32,441
so why don't you get
on your knees, baby?
1761
01:13:33,342 --> 01:13:34,877
Fuck you.
1762
01:13:38,614 --> 01:13:41,550
[DARREN GROANING]
1763
01:13:44,520 --> 01:13:46,355
Oh. Oh.
1764
01:13:46,688 --> 01:13:48,123
Oh, wow.
1765
01:13:49,892 --> 01:13:51,693
I'm sorry you didn't come.
1766
01:13:53,462 --> 01:13:55,464
You know what I love about you?
1767
01:13:55,931 --> 01:13:58,133
You're so comforting, you know?
1768
01:13:58,400 --> 01:14:00,102
Here's the thing...
1769
01:14:00,669 --> 01:14:02,104
Sex dies...
1770
01:14:02,104 --> 01:14:04,006
in every relationship.
1771
01:14:05,340 --> 01:14:06,842
So maybe we should be together.
1772
01:14:06,842 --> 01:14:08,277
-What?
-I'm-- I'm just--
1773
01:14:08,277 --> 01:14:10,813
I'm losing my passion
for Chandra, you know?
1774
01:14:10,813 --> 01:14:11,980
-Oh.
-You know, I just don't want
1775
01:14:11,980 --> 01:14:13,582
-anyone to get hurt.
-Oh my God,
1776
01:14:13,582 --> 01:14:15,818
Chandra broke up with you.
That's why you're here.
1777
01:14:15,818 --> 01:14:18,687
No, she's following
One Direction for a while.
1778
01:14:18,687 --> 01:14:19,955
Oh, perfect!
1779
01:14:19,955 --> 01:14:22,491
-That's so perfect!
-I know.
1780
01:14:22,491 --> 01:14:24,326
I'm a cliché. But...
1781
01:14:24,326 --> 01:14:27,396
the handsome guy runs off
with a younger, hot,
1782
01:14:27,396 --> 01:14:30,599
sexy, fit, tight little girl,
1783
01:14:30,599 --> 01:14:31,633
and then he gets bored,
1784
01:14:31,633 --> 01:14:33,802
and he wants to come
running home to mommy.
1785
01:14:33,802 --> 01:14:36,839
-EVA [SIGHS]
-[MIMICS BABY]
1786
01:14:38,474 --> 01:14:39,274
Mommy?
1787
01:14:39,274 --> 01:14:40,709
Uh,
I'm not your mommy, okay?
1788
01:14:40,709 --> 01:14:43,412
Okay, you don't understand.
Here's the thing.
1789
01:14:43,412 --> 01:14:45,180
I'm saving...
1790
01:14:45,247 --> 01:14:46,949
my sexual energy...
1791
01:14:47,850 --> 01:14:48,550
for my art.
1792
01:14:48,550 --> 01:14:49,918
Here's the thing.
Here's the thing.
1793
01:14:49,918 --> 01:14:52,120
I think maybe sex
doesn't die for everyone.
1794
01:14:52,120 --> 01:14:54,857
It just has died for you
and your weird dick.
1795
01:14:54,857 --> 01:14:56,625
-And Mark couldn't wait...
-Stop it. Stop it.
1796
01:14:56,625 --> 01:14:58,961
...to go down on me.
He fucking loved going down,
1797
01:14:58,961 --> 01:15:00,162
-and I loved it!
-Oh, stop. Ew. Ew. Ew.
1798
01:15:00,162 --> 01:15:02,631
-Oh, no, see, that says it all.
-First of all, ew.
1799
01:15:02,631 --> 01:15:04,466
-"Ew."
-Ew. Ew.
1800
01:15:04,466 --> 01:15:05,634
You asked him
to go down on you.
1801
01:15:05,634 --> 01:15:09,071
No, I didn't ask him!
He asked me! He begged me!
1802
01:15:09,071 --> 01:15:09,972
-Oh, my God.
-Mm-hmm.
1803
01:15:09,972 --> 01:15:11,707
-What an asshole.
-That's what he said.
1804
01:15:11,707 --> 01:15:12,875
-Stop. That's not-- Stop it.
-He did.
1805
01:15:12,875 --> 01:15:15,444
He said I had
a beautiful butthole. Ha-ha!
1806
01:15:15,444 --> 01:15:16,211
[MOANING]
1807
01:15:16,211 --> 01:15:20,082
-You want a line?
-No, thanks. I'm fine.
1808
01:15:22,184 --> 01:15:24,653
Oh! [SIGHS]
1809
01:15:28,657 --> 01:15:30,659
Are you a drug addict?
1810
01:15:31,493 --> 01:15:33,228
Why would you ask that?
1811
01:15:33,495 --> 01:15:35,030
No reason.
1812
01:15:36,565 --> 01:15:39,801
No. Look, that's just
a piece of art, yeah?
1813
01:15:39,801 --> 01:15:42,938
It's a piece of art
about a feeling, you know?
1814
01:15:42,938 --> 01:15:46,008
Just a feeling
some people make me feel.
1815
01:15:46,441 --> 01:15:47,809
So there's a lot
of other people
1816
01:15:47,809 --> 01:15:48,777
who think you're a drug addict?
1817
01:15:48,777 --> 01:15:52,214
No. No, I just like to party
and have a good time is all,
1818
01:15:52,214 --> 01:15:52,814
yeah?
1819
01:15:52,814 --> 01:15:54,416
Who else thinks
you're a drug addict?
1820
01:15:54,416 --> 01:15:58,487
[GROANS] Look,
just my stupid family.
1821
01:15:58,487 --> 01:15:59,187
Your family?
1822
01:15:59,187 --> 01:16:00,889
Yeah, look,
just 'cause they give me money,
1823
01:16:00,889 --> 01:16:04,626
it makes them think they got
the right to judge me, yeah?
1824
01:16:04,927 --> 01:16:07,129
But come on.
Let's get some food.
1825
01:16:07,129 --> 01:16:10,198
Why does your family think
you're a drug addict?
1826
01:16:10,799 --> 01:16:11,967
[SCOFFS]
1827
01:16:11,967 --> 01:16:13,502
I'm Freedom, yeah?
1828
01:16:13,502 --> 01:16:16,271
I'm free from family shackles.
1829
01:16:17,439 --> 01:16:18,974
Stop doing drugs.
1830
01:16:18,974 --> 01:16:20,642
I'll help you.
1831
01:16:24,379 --> 01:16:25,981
I love you.
1832
01:16:28,183 --> 01:16:31,053
Yeah, I-- I love you so much.
1833
01:16:31,520 --> 01:16:33,322
And I've been thinking, yeah?
I--
1834
01:16:33,322 --> 01:16:35,724
I've got to get out of this city
for a while...
1835
01:16:35,724 --> 01:16:39,361
'cause sometimes a man,
he needs to go on walkabout.
1836
01:16:39,361 --> 01:16:41,496
I've got these big mountains
to climb, yeah?
1837
01:16:41,496 --> 01:16:45,033
A man, he needs to be able
to climb his mountains, yeah?
1838
01:16:45,300 --> 01:16:46,101
Do you understand?
1839
01:16:46,101 --> 01:16:48,170
Not really. Are you talking
about real mountains, or--
1840
01:16:48,170 --> 01:16:51,473
I'm talking about the mountains
that only a real man can climb,
1841
01:16:51,473 --> 01:16:53,909
yeah? 'Cause that's-- that's me.
1842
01:16:54,042 --> 01:16:55,577
I'm a man.
1843
01:16:57,012 --> 01:16:58,513
Can I come with you?
1844
01:16:58,513 --> 01:16:59,314
No.
1845
01:16:59,314 --> 01:17:02,484
No, I've got wars to fight.
Do you see?
1846
01:17:03,485 --> 01:17:05,654
Hey, maybe we'll reunite, yeah?
1847
01:17:05,721 --> 01:17:07,289
In, like, five years.
1848
01:17:07,289 --> 01:17:08,690
Five years?
1849
01:17:08,690 --> 01:17:10,192
Yeah.
1850
01:17:10,792 --> 01:17:12,628
Come on, look in my eyes.
1851
01:17:13,595 --> 01:17:15,364
What am I thinking?
1852
01:17:16,365 --> 01:17:17,366
I don't know.
1853
01:17:17,366 --> 01:17:20,268
Can two people
ever really be together?
1854
01:17:20,602 --> 01:17:23,472
And once they're together,
can they ever really be apart?
1855
01:17:23,472 --> 01:17:25,173
These feelings...
1856
01:17:25,474 --> 01:17:27,976
they'll always exist inside us.
1857
01:17:29,945 --> 01:17:32,714
Maybe I'll come back for you
one day.
1858
01:17:33,248 --> 01:17:34,950
But maybe not.
1859
01:17:35,584 --> 01:17:37,052
And remember...
1860
01:17:37,052 --> 01:17:39,621
I left you better
than I found you.
1861
01:17:44,860 --> 01:17:47,095
CANDY: "I left you better
than I found you"?
1862
01:17:47,095 --> 01:17:49,431
HONEY: And then he went off
to climb mountains.
1863
01:17:49,431 --> 01:17:51,199
Probably mountains of cocaine.
1864
01:17:51,199 --> 01:17:53,969
How can I have
the amazing sex again?
1865
01:17:53,969 --> 01:17:55,570
I think he was the one.
1866
01:17:55,570 --> 01:17:58,440
EVA: No, he's not the one.
You're the one.
1867
01:17:58,440 --> 01:18:01,410
You're the only one
that matters.
1868
01:18:01,510 --> 01:18:03,278
These candles are dangerous.
1869
01:18:03,278 --> 01:18:04,112
And they don't work!
1870
01:18:04,112 --> 01:18:06,682
Let's do a spell for the power
to make our dreams come true.
1871
01:18:06,682 --> 01:18:09,551
We don't have power.
We have low self-esteem.
1872
01:18:09,551 --> 01:18:10,852
Okay, don't say that.
1873
01:18:10,852 --> 01:18:13,321
-[YELLING] Ah! The candles!
-Stop it.
1874
01:18:13,321 --> 01:18:16,324
Only a stupid idiot
would believe in a magic candle.
1875
01:18:16,324 --> 01:18:17,125
I believe in them.
1876
01:18:17,125 --> 01:18:18,493
That's 'cause you live
in a fantasy world.
1877
01:18:18,493 --> 01:18:19,661
-What is going on?
-HONEY: Look,
1878
01:18:19,661 --> 01:18:21,129
I paid a lot of money
for your candles
1879
01:18:21,129 --> 01:18:23,565
and I'm gonna sue you
for false advertising!
1880
01:18:23,565 --> 01:18:24,766
I bought them
from a candle emporium.
1881
01:18:24,766 --> 01:18:26,835
-They're not magic.
-I hate the candles!
1882
01:18:26,835 --> 01:18:28,003
-No!
-Whoa, calm down!
1883
01:18:28,003 --> 01:18:29,538
You guys all have your periods,
right? That's--
1884
01:18:29,538 --> 01:18:31,506
The candles suck!
All right, you know,
1885
01:18:31,506 --> 01:18:33,508
this is your friend.
You are fired.
1886
01:18:33,508 --> 01:18:35,377
Oh! I quit!
1887
01:18:35,544 --> 01:18:36,945
She's not my friend!
1888
01:18:36,945 --> 01:18:38,246
'Cause I'm not friends
with people
1889
01:18:38,246 --> 01:18:40,515
that think I'm stupid. [SOBBING]
1890
01:18:41,550 --> 01:18:43,919
And we're not on our periods!
1891
01:18:45,921 --> 01:18:49,224
I mean, to be fair,
I am on my period.
1892
01:18:49,224 --> 01:18:51,727
It's towards the end
of my cycle.
1893
01:18:52,461 --> 01:18:54,796
It's only a matter of time
for the rest of them, right?
1894
01:18:54,796 --> 01:18:56,798
-Would you just stop?
-Okay.
1895
01:18:56,798 --> 01:18:59,234
[MUSIC PLAYING]
1896
01:19:28,396 --> 01:19:30,932
-[SNIFFLING]
-You okay?
1897
01:19:31,032 --> 01:19:33,668
-Not really.
-You know what?
1898
01:19:34,236 --> 01:19:35,971
Screw this place.
1899
01:19:39,040 --> 01:19:40,475
Hey.
1900
01:19:40,909 --> 01:19:44,746
Working with you has been
the best part of my job.
1901
01:19:46,748 --> 01:19:47,883
You know,
I wanted to be the voice
1902
01:19:47,883 --> 01:19:51,620
of modern feminism,
but I'm a loser.
1903
01:19:51,686 --> 01:19:52,254
And I...
1904
01:19:52,254 --> 01:19:53,855
don't think my friends
will ever talk to me again,
1905
01:19:53,855 --> 01:19:54,890
'cause I took a big crap
on them
1906
01:19:54,890 --> 01:19:57,292
and then I crapped
in front of them.
1907
01:19:58,126 --> 01:19:59,294
I took an emotional shit.
1908
01:19:59,294 --> 01:20:03,031
Everything's gonna be okay.
I believe in you, yo.
1909
01:20:03,031 --> 01:20:05,667
And you do have
a feminist voice.
1910
01:20:05,667 --> 01:20:07,169
You're the full package.
1911
01:20:07,169 --> 01:20:10,172
I think you're a package
and a half.
1912
01:20:10,172 --> 01:20:11,973
-I'm a package and a half?
-Yeah.
1913
01:20:11,973 --> 01:20:14,810
I'd even go so far as saying
you're two packages.
1914
01:20:14,810 --> 01:20:17,312
That's the nicest thing
that anyone's ever said to me.
1915
01:20:17,312 --> 01:20:19,848
That's the nicest thing
I've ever said.
1916
01:20:21,516 --> 01:20:22,951
Huh.
1917
01:20:30,458 --> 01:20:32,494
[DOOR KNOCKING]
1918
01:20:35,664 --> 01:20:36,331
[SCREAMS]
1919
01:20:36,331 --> 01:20:37,966
HONEY: Hello. I'm looking
for the special unicorn lady
1920
01:20:37,966 --> 01:20:41,136
who lives in this apartment
and is very magical.
1921
01:20:41,136 --> 01:20:43,305
Oh. Leave me alone.
1922
01:20:43,305 --> 01:20:45,707
I'm living in my fantasy world.
1923
01:20:46,241 --> 01:20:48,043
I'm sorry I was a jerk.
1924
01:20:48,176 --> 01:20:49,945
I really miss you.
1925
01:20:52,514 --> 01:20:53,982
Wow.
1926
01:20:54,249 --> 01:20:57,052
I can't believe you did this.
Thanks.
1927
01:20:57,052 --> 01:20:58,420
Don't thank me.
It's the candles.
1928
01:20:58,420 --> 01:21:00,255
-They really work.
-Stop making fun of me.
1929
01:21:00,255 --> 01:21:04,726
I'm not. My life was depressing
without your magic spells.
1930
01:21:04,793 --> 01:21:06,027
Thank you. It's true.
1931
01:21:06,027 --> 01:21:07,596
Listen, I have a great idea.
1932
01:21:07,596 --> 01:21:11,199
[EVA SPEAKING
IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
1933
01:21:13,535 --> 01:21:16,905
All right, the factory
in Jakarta's running behind.
1934
01:21:17,272 --> 01:21:18,373
[SIGHS]
1935
01:21:18,373 --> 01:21:19,541
Can we sell
the magical candles
1936
01:21:19,541 --> 01:21:21,076
in your store
and use the profits
1937
01:21:21,076 --> 01:21:21,910
to pay Candy's rent?
1938
01:21:21,910 --> 01:21:25,780
I don't know. Maybe I have
too much low self-esteem.
1939
01:21:26,014 --> 01:21:27,782
I'm sorry
that I projectile-vomited
1940
01:21:27,782 --> 01:21:28,750
my low self-esteem onto you,
1941
01:21:28,750 --> 01:21:31,519
and I promise to swallow it
back down next time.
1942
01:21:31,519 --> 01:21:32,654
Ew.
1943
01:21:32,654 --> 01:21:34,422
That is the grossest analogy.
1944
01:21:34,422 --> 01:21:39,427
-Yes, you can sell candles here.
-Thank you.
1945
01:21:39,961 --> 01:21:42,197
You guys look really cute.
1946
01:21:42,197 --> 01:21:43,632
-We're witches.
-Oh!
1947
01:21:43,632 --> 01:21:45,734
I thought you were,
like, mean cowgirls.
1948
01:21:45,734 --> 01:21:47,269
Witches. It's better.
It's better.
1949
01:21:47,269 --> 01:21:49,404
Come see.
We'll set up over here.
1950
01:21:50,839 --> 01:21:52,173
CANDY: A lot of people are gonna
tell you
1951
01:21:52,173 --> 01:21:53,375
you can't do things
in your life,
1952
01:21:53,375 --> 01:21:55,277
and I'm here to tell you
that you can.
1953
01:21:55,277 --> 01:21:56,811
Believe in yourself.
1954
01:21:56,811 --> 01:22:00,248
And remember
how amazing you really are.
1955
01:22:03,518 --> 01:22:05,587
Oh! We sold so many.
1956
01:22:05,587 --> 01:22:07,555
Wow, witches are, like,
the new vampires.
1957
01:22:07,555 --> 01:22:10,926
It's shocking how many people
are buying these things.
1958
01:22:10,926 --> 01:22:13,828
The two children's dresses
we made came in.
1959
01:22:13,828 --> 01:22:15,997
What do you want
to do with them?
1960
01:22:15,997 --> 01:22:17,365
Oh. [SIGHS]
1961
01:22:17,365 --> 01:22:18,800
What's happening with Mark?
1962
01:22:18,800 --> 01:22:21,202
We broke up.
I forgot the good-guy pact
1963
01:22:21,202 --> 01:22:24,873
and I chose Darren.
And I really regret it.
1964
01:22:24,873 --> 01:22:26,041
You gotta give
those little girls
1965
01:22:26,041 --> 01:22:27,475
-their dresses.
-EVA: I'm pretty sure
1966
01:22:27,475 --> 01:22:30,245
he never wants to see me again.
1967
01:22:31,613 --> 01:22:34,082
Fine. What do you think?
Maybe not, right?
1968
01:22:34,082 --> 01:22:36,017
-[CHILDREN LAUGHING]
-Oh, my God!
1969
01:22:36,017 --> 01:22:38,086
That look. Jeez.
1970
01:22:38,086 --> 01:22:39,955
All right. Okay.
1971
01:22:46,328 --> 01:22:48,964
He didn't come,
so there you go.
1972
01:22:49,431 --> 01:22:50,298
Not home, right?
1973
01:22:50,298 --> 01:22:52,300
-[DOOR OPENING]
-Oh, God.
1974
01:22:53,001 --> 01:22:55,603
Uh, hi. How are you? Um...
1975
01:22:56,538 --> 01:23:00,342
I know you probably
don't want to see me. Um...
1976
01:23:00,342 --> 01:23:03,144
I made dresses
for your daughters.
1977
01:23:04,546 --> 01:23:06,114
Nice. Thank you.
1978
01:23:07,415 --> 01:23:08,683
I'm sorry.
1979
01:23:08,683 --> 01:23:11,553
I'm so sorry I sabotaged
our relationship.
1980
01:23:11,553 --> 01:23:14,356
And I'm sorry I treated you
so badly
1981
01:23:14,356 --> 01:23:18,026
when you're just, like,
the greatest guy.
1982
01:23:18,426 --> 01:23:20,662
Thanks for saying that,
but, uh...
1983
01:23:20,662 --> 01:23:23,732
I don't think we should
see each other anymore.
1984
01:23:26,868 --> 01:23:27,469
Um...
1985
01:23:27,469 --> 01:23:30,138
for what it's worth,
I broke up with Darren...
1986
01:23:30,205 --> 01:23:31,706
for good.
1987
01:23:32,407 --> 01:23:33,641
Just...
1988
01:23:33,641 --> 01:23:36,077
I don't think
I liked myself enough
1989
01:23:36,077 --> 01:23:38,179
to choose a good guy.
1990
01:23:38,947 --> 01:23:41,049
I didn't think I deserved it.
1991
01:23:41,049 --> 01:23:41,950
MARY: Eva!
1992
01:23:41,950 --> 01:23:44,019
-Hey, sweetie!
-Hey, Eva.
1993
01:23:44,019 --> 01:23:44,953
I made you dresses.
1994
01:23:44,953 --> 01:23:48,490
Yay! Come in!
Evie, Evie, Evie!
1995
01:23:53,261 --> 01:23:54,896
[WHISPERING] Yes!
1996
01:23:55,830 --> 01:23:59,968
I like the dress.
I'm having an orgasm.
1997
01:23:59,968 --> 01:24:03,705
[MUSIC PLAYING]
1998
01:24:06,674 --> 01:24:09,611
♪ I feel it ♪
1999
01:24:10,745 --> 01:24:14,249
♪ I feel it ♪
2000
01:24:14,516 --> 01:24:18,119
♪ I feel it ♪
2001
01:24:18,119 --> 01:24:21,923
♪ I feel love ♪
2002
01:24:22,991 --> 01:24:25,427
EVA: Who knew getting a divorce
could be so great?
2003
01:24:25,427 --> 01:24:28,096
-CANDY: Yeah.
-What's going on with Daniel?
2004
01:24:28,096 --> 01:24:31,499
Nothing! That's why we need
a super-powerful spell.
2005
01:24:31,499 --> 01:24:34,302
I think we should call
on all the elements to help us.
2006
01:24:34,302 --> 01:24:35,670
-Honey, are you in?
-I'm so in.
2007
01:24:35,670 --> 01:24:37,372
In fact, I'm gonna call
on the elements.
2008
01:24:37,372 --> 01:24:38,606
What are the elements?
2009
01:24:38,606 --> 01:24:40,208
-[LAUGHING]
-Uh, Earth.
2010
01:24:40,208 --> 01:24:42,577
Okay, Earth. Earth. Okay.
2011
01:24:42,577 --> 01:24:43,945
I am going to-- I don't know,
2012
01:24:43,945 --> 01:24:47,582
I'm going to call on the Earth
and-- Is that really dorky?
2013
01:24:47,582 --> 01:24:48,817
-No, no, no!
-No, it's amazing!
2014
01:24:48,817 --> 01:24:51,553
-I'm gonna walk on it. Why not?
-CANDY: Okay.
2015
01:24:51,553 --> 01:24:53,421
CANDY: What's up, earth?
[LAUGHING]
2016
01:24:53,421 --> 01:24:54,622
HONEY: Okay,
what's another element?
2017
01:24:54,622 --> 01:24:57,592
-Uh, wind.
-Okay, what about...
2018
01:24:59,694 --> 01:25:02,363
-Would incense count?
-Yeah!
2019
01:25:02,464 --> 01:25:04,999
-Sure.
-All right. Um...
2020
01:25:04,999 --> 01:25:06,468
we call on the wind.
2021
01:25:06,468 --> 01:25:09,971
[WIND BLOWING]
2022
01:25:09,971 --> 01:25:12,474
-Am I imagining that?
-No.
2023
01:25:12,474 --> 01:25:15,043
-Wow, so cool!
-So cool!
2024
01:25:15,043 --> 01:25:19,214
Okay, what about water?
Here. Drink your drinks.
2025
01:25:22,984 --> 01:25:24,752
I call on water!
2026
01:25:24,752 --> 01:25:27,922
[THUNDER RUMBLING]
2027
01:25:27,922 --> 01:25:29,924
[SQUEALING]
2028
01:25:29,924 --> 01:25:31,960
Guys, we made it rain.
2029
01:25:32,494 --> 01:25:34,496
CANDY: Candles are fire.
2030
01:25:34,929 --> 01:25:36,798
Purple for power.
2031
01:25:36,798 --> 01:25:38,800
The power to get what we want.
2032
01:25:40,068 --> 01:25:41,703
Say your wishes.
2033
01:25:41,769 --> 01:25:43,538
I wish to like myself.
2034
01:25:43,538 --> 01:25:46,174
-So mote it be.
-So mote it be.
2035
01:25:46,808 --> 01:25:51,012
I wish to know that I deserve
the good things in life.
2036
01:25:51,012 --> 01:25:53,114
ALL: So mote it be.
2037
01:25:55,850 --> 01:25:57,385
I wish for love...
2038
01:25:57,385 --> 01:25:58,887
-and money.
-[HONEY CHUCKLES]
2039
01:25:58,887 --> 01:26:01,055
-So mote it be.
-So mote it be.
2040
01:26:01,289 --> 01:26:05,360
We ask the elements to help us
with our hearts' desires.
2041
01:26:06,060 --> 01:26:07,529
This...
2042
01:26:07,829 --> 01:26:09,564
or something better.
2043
01:26:09,631 --> 01:26:13,935
♪ All I could ever need
Is you ♪
2044
01:26:13,935 --> 01:26:15,703
[CANDY LAUGHING]
2045
01:26:15,703 --> 01:26:19,641
If you believe in magic,
then there's magic!
2046
01:26:21,709 --> 01:26:23,044
[CHEERING]
2047
01:26:23,044 --> 01:26:26,414
[LAUGHING]
2048
01:26:27,215 --> 01:26:29,150
It's raining so hard!
2049
01:26:29,150 --> 01:26:31,686
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
2050
01:26:31,953 --> 01:26:33,988
HONEY: "To truly experience
ecstatic sex,
2051
01:26:33,988 --> 01:26:36,024
you must first fall in love
with yourself.
2052
01:26:36,024 --> 01:26:40,028
Look at yourself in a mirror
and say, 'I love you.' "
2053
01:26:42,030 --> 01:26:43,831
[SIGHS]
2054
01:26:45,967 --> 01:26:47,502
I love you.
2055
01:26:49,971 --> 01:26:51,573
I love you.
2056
01:26:53,241 --> 01:26:54,642
Well...
2057
01:26:55,977 --> 01:26:57,812
"Now look at your yoni
in a mirror
2058
01:26:57,812 --> 01:27:00,682
and admire
its tremendous beauty."
2059
01:27:06,754 --> 01:27:08,389
I love you.
2060
01:27:08,790 --> 01:27:12,760
"Discover what kind of pressure
you like. Play music."
2061
01:27:20,535 --> 01:27:22,870
♪ I pull up to the club ♪
2062
01:27:22,870 --> 01:27:24,772
♪ I got my swag on ♪
2063
01:27:24,772 --> 01:27:26,641
♪ The music's playing loud ♪
2064
01:27:26,641 --> 01:27:28,776
♪ Can't play their money y'all ♪
2065
01:27:28,776 --> 01:27:31,079
♪ I see 'em lookin' at me ♪
2066
01:27:31,079 --> 01:27:33,047
♪ She got a pretty smile ♪
2067
01:27:33,047 --> 01:27:35,683
♪ So I'm-a get a drink ♪
2068
01:27:35,683 --> 01:27:38,920
[SOFT MUSIC PLAYING]
2069
01:27:42,757 --> 01:27:44,058
Mm. Okay.
2070
01:27:44,058 --> 01:27:48,062
[GROOVY MUSIC PLAYING]
2071
01:27:48,062 --> 01:27:49,897
♪ Come on ♪
2072
01:27:52,967 --> 01:27:55,703
Hell! Hell! Hell!
2073
01:27:55,703 --> 01:27:58,306
And hell!
2074
01:27:58,306 --> 01:27:58,973
Shut up.
2075
01:27:58,973 --> 01:28:00,174
♪ Girl I want ya ♪
2076
01:28:00,174 --> 01:28:02,577
♪ There's no way... ♪
2077
01:28:05,280 --> 01:28:09,083
-Can you take your shirt off?
-Don't. Please. Please don't.
2078
01:28:09,083 --> 01:28:10,985
Can I just leave it on?
2079
01:28:11,052 --> 01:28:12,854
Can I-- Okay.
2080
01:28:14,656 --> 01:28:16,157
Um...
2081
01:28:19,060 --> 01:28:19,727
I just...
2082
01:28:19,727 --> 01:28:22,797
I don't want you
to be disappointed.
2083
01:28:24,399 --> 01:28:27,368
Why don't you let me be
the judge of that?
2084
01:28:35,610 --> 01:28:38,579
[SOFT MUSIC PLAYING]
2085
01:28:48,523 --> 01:28:50,525
[SIGHS]
2086
01:28:51,859 --> 01:28:55,830
You are the most beautiful
woman I've ever seen.
2087
01:29:03,271 --> 01:29:05,306
[EVE LAUGHING]
2088
01:29:06,541 --> 01:29:09,010
-[SIGHS]
-WOMAN: See ya, Jane.
2089
01:29:10,545 --> 01:29:11,312
-Hi.
-Hi.
2090
01:29:11,312 --> 01:29:13,047
Can I talk to you
for a second?
2091
01:29:13,047 --> 01:29:13,881
-Okay.
-Um,
2092
01:29:13,881 --> 01:29:15,483
I'm the old assistant
who likes sluts.
2093
01:29:15,483 --> 01:29:17,352
I know who you are.
I liked your script.
2094
01:29:17,352 --> 01:29:20,988
Thank you. So I'm not working
for Peter anymore.
2095
01:29:20,988 --> 01:29:21,856
Good. He's a dick.
2096
01:29:21,856 --> 01:29:24,892
Yeah. And I wrote a new script
and I wanted to pitch it to you
2097
01:29:24,892 --> 01:29:26,694
and I was hoping
you would read it.
2098
01:29:26,694 --> 01:29:27,729
How did you find me?
2099
01:29:27,729 --> 01:29:30,431
Well, I, uh...
I stole Peter's contacts.
2100
01:29:30,431 --> 01:29:33,434
-Oh, very sneaky. I like that.
-I'm sneaky.
2101
01:29:33,434 --> 01:29:35,236
-Mm-hmm.
-I want to be a filmmaker.
2102
01:29:35,236 --> 01:29:36,904
Really?
Have you directed before?
2103
01:29:36,904 --> 01:29:39,440
-No, just a short.
-Hmm. Well, okay.
2104
01:29:39,440 --> 01:29:42,477
You can walk me to my car.
I'll give you five minutes.
2105
01:29:42,477 --> 01:29:43,945
Okay!
2106
01:29:48,716 --> 01:29:50,551
Are you dating Steve?
2107
01:29:51,252 --> 01:29:53,221
What? No.
2108
01:29:57,125 --> 01:29:59,827
-Let's be monogamous.
-Oh!
2109
01:29:59,827 --> 01:30:01,195
Let's be monogamous right now!
2110
01:30:01,195 --> 01:30:02,964
-Yeah!
-Yeah!
2111
01:30:03,865 --> 01:30:05,900
-CANDY: Oh!
-Ow.
2112
01:30:07,535 --> 01:30:08,102
Mm-hmm!
2113
01:30:08,102 --> 01:30:10,138
I am going to get
the biggest Cosmo they got.
2114
01:30:10,138 --> 01:30:12,106
-Make it a double.
-Oh, I just love your boots.
2115
01:30:12,106 --> 01:30:14,809
-They're gorgeous.
-Right? I know. Right?
2116
01:30:15,076 --> 01:30:17,211
-Excuse me.
-Yes?
2117
01:30:17,211 --> 01:30:20,548
Are you the priest
from St. Francis of Assisi?
2118
01:30:20,615 --> 01:30:22,550
Yes, I used to be.
2119
01:30:22,550 --> 01:30:25,653
I used to go to your church
when I was a kid.
2120
01:30:26,120 --> 01:30:27,555
Oh!
2121
01:30:27,555 --> 01:30:29,457
-Well.
-Yeah.
2122
01:30:29,457 --> 01:30:30,925
Hmm.
2123
01:30:31,659 --> 01:30:33,728
Didn't you used to preach
that no one should have sex
2124
01:30:33,728 --> 01:30:35,863
unless it was for the purpose
of procreation?
2125
01:30:35,863 --> 01:30:37,632
Oh, I used to say
a lot of stuff.
2126
01:30:37,632 --> 01:30:39,534
-FRANK: Mm-hmm.
-Now I just do what feels good.
2127
01:30:39,534 --> 01:30:42,570
-And what feels good is Frank.
-Mm-hmm!
2128
01:30:42,570 --> 01:30:44,839
Excuse me. But--
but what about people
2129
01:30:44,839 --> 01:30:45,840
who listened to what you said
2130
01:30:45,840 --> 01:30:48,075
and then they spent
their lives feeling tormented?
2131
01:30:48,075 --> 01:30:49,777
And what about hell?
2132
01:30:50,745 --> 01:30:52,246
Sorry?
2133
01:30:56,617 --> 01:30:58,019
Don't torment yourself.
2134
01:30:58,019 --> 01:31:00,988
I think God wants us
to be happy.
2135
01:31:04,325 --> 01:31:07,662
-So uncomfortable.
-Right? I know.
2136
01:31:09,597 --> 01:31:12,567
I know you're gonna talk
at TED one day.
2137
01:31:12,567 --> 01:31:14,435
You are so great.
2138
01:31:14,435 --> 01:31:15,770
I love you.
2139
01:31:15,770 --> 01:31:18,606
I love you. Thank you.
2140
01:31:20,908 --> 01:31:23,511
You know, Honey got me
that unicorn.
2141
01:31:23,511 --> 01:31:25,279
It's so cute!
2142
01:31:25,580 --> 01:31:27,448
Unicorns are lame.
2143
01:31:30,618 --> 01:31:32,520
You don't like unicorns?
2144
01:31:33,488 --> 01:31:35,323
-Eh.
-What?
2145
01:31:35,323 --> 01:31:37,492
I-- I just...
2146
01:31:37,492 --> 01:31:39,694
I'm not crazy about 'em.
2147
01:31:39,760 --> 01:31:42,697
How can you not like unicorns?
2148
01:31:43,130 --> 01:31:45,132
I-- I think they're creepy.
2149
01:31:45,132 --> 01:31:46,367
-Creepy?
-Yes,
2150
01:31:46,367 --> 01:31:49,103
especially when they're looking
over the bed.
2151
01:31:49,103 --> 01:31:51,205
Look, a human interacting
with a computer
2152
01:31:51,205 --> 01:31:53,908
is interesting, you know?
But when a human interacts
2153
01:31:53,908 --> 01:31:55,710
with a unicorn...
2154
01:31:56,544 --> 01:32:00,114
-not as much, okay?
-Unicorns are interesting.
2155
01:32:00,114 --> 01:32:02,216
I just... I think
you're a beautiful,
2156
01:32:02,216 --> 01:32:03,150
lovely, attractive woman.
2157
01:32:03,150 --> 01:32:06,053
I think you should just limit
how much you talk about unicorns
2158
01:32:06,053 --> 01:32:07,221
in front of people, okay?
2159
01:32:07,221 --> 01:32:08,789
I just don't want you
to be uncomfortable
2160
01:32:08,789 --> 01:32:10,057
when you meet the TED people.
2161
01:32:10,057 --> 01:32:12,994
So maybe not, you know,
don't talk about them too much
2162
01:32:12,994 --> 01:32:14,729
in front of everyone.
2163
01:32:19,500 --> 01:32:20,768
Huh.
2164
01:32:21,702 --> 01:32:24,572
I want to be monogamous,
but not with you.
2165
01:32:25,706 --> 01:32:28,609
-What?
-I want to date other people.
2166
01:32:29,477 --> 01:32:31,045
Are-- are you kidding?
2167
01:32:31,812 --> 01:32:33,447
I'm a unicorn.
2168
01:32:33,915 --> 01:32:35,449
What? I...
2169
01:32:35,716 --> 01:32:36,651
What are you saying?
2170
01:32:36,651 --> 01:32:40,454
You don't like unicorns,
and that's a deal breaker.
2171
01:32:42,390 --> 01:32:44,158
Let's be friends.
2172
01:32:55,970 --> 01:32:58,406
[SOFT MUSIC PLAYING]
2173
01:32:59,840 --> 01:33:02,209
♪ Ooh ♪
2174
01:33:05,546 --> 01:33:08,215
♪ That feels ♪
2175
01:33:09,350 --> 01:33:11,552
♪ Inside ♪
2176
01:33:11,819 --> 01:33:13,421
[SIGHS]
2177
01:33:13,688 --> 01:33:17,124
♪ All I ever want ♪
2178
01:33:17,425 --> 01:33:20,928
♪ All I could ever need ♪
2179
01:33:20,928 --> 01:33:25,866
♪ You and I ♪
2180
01:33:28,302 --> 01:33:33,074
♪ You and I ♪
2181
01:33:33,641 --> 01:33:35,343
WOMAN: You are loved.
2182
01:33:35,343 --> 01:33:39,280
This feeling
is always inside of you.
2183
01:33:39,280 --> 01:33:42,717
♪ And all I could ever see ♪
2184
01:33:42,717 --> 01:33:45,920
♪ All I could ever want ♪
2185
01:33:45,920 --> 01:33:50,458
♪ All I could ever need
Is you ♪
2186
01:34:04,271 --> 01:34:07,041
Hey.
2187
01:34:07,108 --> 01:34:07,975
What are you doing here?
2188
01:34:07,975 --> 01:34:11,045
Um, I wrote the script
about the witches.
2189
01:34:11,045 --> 01:34:12,913
-Honey, that's incredible.
-[HONEY GIGGLES]
2190
01:34:12,913 --> 01:34:15,916
-Wow, that's great.
-[HONEY CHUCKLES]
2191
01:34:15,916 --> 01:34:18,319
How-- how did you know
where I live?
2192
01:34:18,319 --> 01:34:20,855
I stole Peter's contacts, yo.
[CHUCKLES]
2193
01:34:20,855 --> 01:34:23,124
You know,
you're really nice to me.
2194
01:34:23,791 --> 01:34:25,626
And nice is sexy.
2195
01:34:25,893 --> 01:34:26,694
Nice is sexy, yo.
2196
01:34:26,694 --> 01:34:28,796
♪ I learned this 'cause
I've been nicer to myself ♪
2197
01:34:28,796 --> 01:34:31,899
♪ And now I see it
See I'm like a little tree ♪
2198
01:34:31,899 --> 01:34:33,200
♪ I need to nurture myself ♪
2199
01:34:33,200 --> 01:34:35,302
♪ With some happy
Little thoughts ♪
2200
01:34:35,302 --> 01:34:37,004
♪ And that's what I did yo ♪
2201
01:34:37,004 --> 01:34:38,639
Da-da-dum, blossom.
2202
01:34:38,639 --> 01:34:39,573
[CHUCKLES]
2203
01:34:39,573 --> 01:34:41,575
Do you want to go on a date?
2204
01:34:42,276 --> 01:34:45,212
-More than ever.
-[CHUCKLES]
2205
01:34:46,547 --> 01:34:48,049
[GASPS] Ta-dah!
2206
01:34:48,049 --> 01:34:50,484
-Aw!
-We're so proud of you.
2207
01:34:50,484 --> 01:34:51,419
Yeah!
2208
01:34:51,419 --> 01:34:52,920
You're the orgasming champion!
2209
01:34:52,920 --> 01:34:55,156
-HONEY: Oh, thank you.
-And the masturbating champion!
2210
01:34:55,156 --> 01:34:57,491
I'm not sure
who I was competing against,
2211
01:34:57,491 --> 01:34:59,026
but I'm glad I won!
2212
01:34:59,026 --> 01:35:01,195
I want to light a candle
for our friendship,
2213
01:35:01,195 --> 01:35:03,631
'cause I'm really grateful
for you guys.
2214
01:35:03,631 --> 01:35:05,733
[SOFT MUSIC PLAYING]
2215
01:35:06,000 --> 01:35:07,668
[LIGHTER FLICKER]
2216
01:35:12,640 --> 01:35:15,810
I heard this music
and it made me think of you.
2217
01:35:17,278 --> 01:35:20,881
[TECHNO MUSIC PLAYING]
2218
01:35:23,284 --> 01:35:27,655
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2219
01:35:27,655 --> 01:35:29,990
♪ Is real is real is real ♪
2220
01:35:29,990 --> 01:35:34,195
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2221
01:35:34,195 --> 01:35:36,430
♪ Is real is real is real ♪
2222
01:35:36,430 --> 01:35:40,868
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2223
01:35:40,868 --> 01:35:43,270
♪ Is real is real is real ♪
2224
01:35:43,270 --> 01:35:47,475
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2225
01:35:47,475 --> 01:35:50,010
♪ Is real is real is real ♪
2226
01:35:50,010 --> 01:35:53,114
♪ A kiss good night
A kiss by darkness ♪
2227
01:35:53,114 --> 01:35:56,050
♪ A kiss to all the end
Of rain ♪
2228
01:35:56,050 --> 01:35:59,386
♪ To stall this night
To stall this darkness ♪
2229
01:35:59,386 --> 01:36:02,823
♪ To stall this night
To the end of days ♪
2230
01:36:02,823 --> 01:36:06,994
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2231
01:36:06,994 --> 01:36:09,463
Cut! [CHEERING]
2232
01:36:09,730 --> 01:36:13,300
♪ Don't you wanna know
That magic is real ♪
2233
01:36:13,300 --> 01:36:17,104
♪ Don't you wanna have
Something to feel ♪
2234
01:36:17,104 --> 01:36:17,972
♪ One life ♪
2235
01:36:17,972 --> 01:36:22,176
♪ And the world
Will open doorways ♪
2236
01:36:22,176 --> 01:36:24,612
ALL: I love my pussy!
2237
01:36:24,612 --> 01:36:28,983
-Yes to orgasms!
-ALL: Yes to orgasms!
2238
01:36:29,183 --> 01:36:32,019
Yes
2239
01:36:32,019 --> 01:36:34,722
to orgasms!
2240
01:36:34,722 --> 01:36:38,025
ALL: Yes to orgasms!
2241
01:36:38,025 --> 01:36:41,729
Masters and Johnson taught us
that an orgasm was just,
2242
01:36:41,729 --> 01:36:44,632
you know, like,
up, down, like, quick.
2243
01:36:44,632 --> 01:36:47,568
It isn't. You can train yourself
2244
01:36:47,568 --> 01:36:49,103
to have an extended,
2245
01:36:49,103 --> 01:36:53,641
massive orgasm.
Isn't that amazing?
2246
01:36:54,141 --> 01:36:55,576
Who here would like to learn
2247
01:36:55,576 --> 01:36:59,313
how to have an extended,
massive orgasm?
2248
01:36:59,313 --> 01:37:01,315
[ALL CHEERING]
2249
01:37:01,315 --> 01:37:03,684
Who here would like
to learn how to have
2250
01:37:03,684 --> 01:37:05,920
an earth-shattering orgasm?
2251
01:37:05,920 --> 01:37:09,256
[ALL CHEERING]
2252
01:37:09,256 --> 01:37:14,595
♪ And I will believe in us ♪
2253
01:37:18,265 --> 01:37:19,967
I tell my pussy that I love her.
2254
01:37:19,967 --> 01:37:23,204
I love you, pussy. I love you.
I love you so much.
2255
01:37:23,204 --> 01:37:27,775
You're a sweet, sweet,
sweet little puss.
2256
01:37:29,543 --> 01:37:34,215
♪ I will believe in you ♪
2257
01:37:35,716 --> 01:37:40,988
♪ And I will believe in us ♪
2258
01:37:41,989 --> 01:37:47,528
♪ And I will believe
That all of this is true ♪
2259
01:37:48,796 --> 01:37:55,202
♪ And I will believe in us
Tonight ♪
2260
01:37:55,202 --> 01:37:56,070
♪ Tonight ♪
2261
01:37:56,070 --> 01:37:59,707
♪ Just for once don't you wanna
Know magic is real ♪
2262
01:37:59,707 --> 01:38:02,176
♪ Is real is real is real ♪
2263
01:38:02,176 --> 01:38:06,413
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2264
01:38:06,413 --> 01:38:08,849
♪ Is real is real is real ♪
2265
01:38:08,849 --> 01:38:13,120
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2266
01:38:13,120 --> 01:38:15,456
♪ Is real is real is real ♪
2267
01:38:15,456 --> 01:38:19,560
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2268
01:38:19,560 --> 01:38:22,062
♪ Is real is real is real ♪
2269
01:38:22,062 --> 01:38:25,532
♪ A kiss goodnight
A kiss by darkness ♪
2270
01:38:25,532 --> 01:38:28,502
♪ A kiss to all the end
Of rain ♪
2271
01:38:28,502 --> 01:38:31,939
♪ To stall this night
To stall this darkness ♪
2272
01:38:31,939 --> 01:38:35,309
♪ To stall this night
Till the end of days ♪
2273
01:38:35,309 --> 01:38:40,547
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2274
01:38:55,963 --> 01:38:57,164
♪ Just for once ♪
2275
01:38:57,164 --> 01:39:01,969
♪ Just for once
Don't you wanna know ♪
2276
01:39:02,703 --> 01:39:03,737
♪ Just for once ♪
2277
01:39:03,737 --> 01:39:08,275
♪ Just for once
Don't you wanna know ♪
2278
01:39:08,475 --> 01:39:12,746
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2279
01:39:12,746 --> 01:39:15,115
♪ Is real is real is real ♪
2280
01:39:15,115 --> 01:39:19,286
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2281
01:39:19,286 --> 01:39:21,722
♪ Is real is real is real ♪
2282
01:39:21,722 --> 01:39:25,826
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2283
01:39:25,826 --> 01:39:28,329
♪ Is real is real is real ♪
2284
01:39:28,329 --> 01:39:32,399
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2285
01:39:32,399 --> 01:39:35,002
♪ Is real is real is real ♪
2286
01:39:35,002 --> 01:39:39,006
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2287
01:39:39,006 --> 01:39:41,642
♪ Is real is real is real ♪
2288
01:39:41,642 --> 01:39:45,846
♪ Just for once don't you
Wanna know that magic is real ♪
2289
01:39:45,846 --> 01:39:50,084
♪ Is real is real is real ♪
2290
01:39:54,722 --> 01:39:58,926
-[ALL CHEERING]
-Presenting
2291
01:39:58,926 --> 01:40:00,060
pussy!
2292
01:40:00,060 --> 01:40:02,062
[ALL CHEERING]
163896
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