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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,672 --> 00:00:04,676 ♪ ♪ 2 00:00:21,175 --> 00:00:23,046 LINDA: Come on! We're dying out here! 3 00:00:23,113 --> 00:00:24,650 I spent all week on that costume. 4 00:00:24,716 --> 00:00:26,630 - We want to see you in it. - LOUISE: Hold on, woman! 5 00:00:26,654 --> 00:00:28,390 Three kids getting in a group costume here. 6 00:00:28,456 --> 00:00:30,460 There's a lot of Tina's boobs in my face. 7 00:00:30,528 --> 00:00:31,462 GENE: And Gene's. 8 00:00:31,530 --> 00:00:33,166 So, Teddy, 9 00:00:33,233 --> 00:00:34,612 you gonna go home and hand out candy? 10 00:00:34,636 --> 00:00:36,239 Uh, no, I'm gonna go donate blood, 11 00:00:36,306 --> 00:00:37,776 the candy of the veins. 12 00:00:37,842 --> 00:00:40,080 Ugh. I mean, good for you. 13 00:00:40,147 --> 00:00:42,284 You're gonna donate blood? At night? On Halloween? 14 00:00:42,351 --> 00:00:44,188 Yeah, it's fun. They turn the bloodmobile 15 00:00:44,255 --> 00:00:46,025 into a vampire mobile. 16 00:00:46,092 --> 00:00:48,072 Hey, you guys should come. It's right down the street. 17 00:00:48,096 --> 00:00:49,833 I want to give my blood to a vampire car. 18 00:00:49,900 --> 00:00:51,670 Bob, What do you say? 19 00:00:51,737 --> 00:00:53,717 - You want to come donate blood with me and Linda? - Mm, no. 20 00:00:53,741 --> 00:00:56,112 Bob's a little squeamish around blood, 21 00:00:56,179 --> 00:00:57,558 but I'm in 'cause I'm a good person. 22 00:00:57,582 --> 00:00:59,151 Great. You know what blood type you are? 23 00:00:59,218 --> 00:01:00,955 I'm AB. It's half an ABBA. 24 00:01:01,022 --> 00:01:04,061 I'm A positive. I remember 'cause it was my first A plus. 25 00:01:04,128 --> 00:01:06,008 And Bob is O negative. I remember that 'cause I said, 26 00:01:06,032 --> 00:01:07,736 "Oh, don't be negative just 'cause 27 00:01:07,802 --> 00:01:09,114 I got a better grade on my blood test, you." 28 00:01:09,138 --> 00:01:11,610 - (laughs) - Wait. Bob, you're O negative? 29 00:01:11,677 --> 00:01:12,979 - That's amazing. - Why? 30 00:01:13,046 --> 00:01:14,850 Isn't O negative stupid blood? 31 00:01:14,916 --> 00:01:17,254 No, O negative is the universal donor blood. 32 00:01:17,321 --> 00:01:19,191 They can put your blood in anyone. 33 00:01:19,258 --> 00:01:21,129 - Your blood is hero blood. - Oh, God, is it? 34 00:01:21,195 --> 00:01:22,541 You got to come donate blood with us, Bobby. 35 00:01:22,565 --> 00:01:24,135 No, I don't, Teddy. 36 00:01:24,201 --> 00:01:26,139 And I know that might make me a horrible person, 37 00:01:26,205 --> 00:01:27,542 but, oh‐oh... oh, well. 38 00:01:27,609 --> 00:01:30,548 Wow. Hero blood just sloshing around inside of you. 39 00:01:30,615 --> 00:01:32,260 - (guttural groaning) - But you won't let someone 40 00:01:32,284 --> 00:01:34,164 stick a needle in there and fill up a blood bag? 41 00:01:34,221 --> 00:01:36,059 - Oh. Oh. - Teddy, no. 42 00:01:36,125 --> 00:01:38,105 - He's gonna faint. Stop. - LOUISE: Okay, We're ready. 43 00:01:38,129 --> 00:01:39,900 Ta‐da. Snailed it. 44 00:01:39,966 --> 00:01:42,037 What? Oh. Ha! 'Cause you're a snail. 45 00:01:42,104 --> 00:01:44,041 You guys can breathe in there, right? 46 00:01:44,108 --> 00:01:45,177 I don't want to be the mom 47 00:01:45,243 --> 00:01:47,181 who suffocated her kids in a giant snail. 48 00:01:47,247 --> 00:01:48,860 We can breathe just fine. See, I'm breathing 49 00:01:48,884 --> 00:01:49,820 through the candy‐hatch here. 50 00:01:49,886 --> 00:01:51,724 I thought we were calling that the fart vent. 51 00:01:51,790 --> 00:01:54,261 It's both. And it also happens to be wide enough 52 00:01:54,328 --> 00:01:55,832 for an entire bowl of candy 53 00:01:55,898 --> 00:01:57,702 from a certain candy‐stiffer's house. 54 00:01:57,769 --> 00:02:00,207 I‐I mean, a single piece of candy, 55 00:02:00,273 --> 00:02:01,610 which is all we plan on taking. 56 00:02:01,677 --> 00:02:03,547 Wait a minute. Does this have anything to do 57 00:02:03,614 --> 00:02:05,854 with that one house that ran out of candy a few years ago 58 00:02:05,885 --> 00:02:07,522 that you can't let go of for some reason? 59 00:02:07,589 --> 00:02:09,058 First of all, it was two years ago, 60 00:02:09,125 --> 00:02:11,329 and then they stiffed me again last year, 61 00:02:11,395 --> 00:02:13,133 but I can't believe you remember that. 62 00:02:13,199 --> 00:02:15,538 I barely remember that. (laughing) 63 00:02:15,605 --> 00:02:17,709 - (doorbell rings) - ALL: Trick‐or‐treat. 64 00:02:17,776 --> 00:02:19,178 Here you go. 65 00:02:19,245 --> 00:02:20,885 Full‐sized Professor Caramels? Mama likey. 66 00:02:20,948 --> 00:02:22,050 - GENE: Mmm. - Uh‐oh. 67 00:02:22,117 --> 00:02:23,119 That was our last one. 68 00:02:23,186 --> 00:02:26,660 ‐Sorry. ‐Wait. Seriously? You're out of candy? 69 00:02:26,727 --> 00:02:29,031 Come back next year, and we'll, uh... 70 00:02:29,098 --> 00:02:30,768 we'll give you twice as much candy, okay? 71 00:02:30,835 --> 00:02:32,605 Yes, of course. These things happen. 72 00:02:32,672 --> 00:02:35,410 I will see you in 365 days. 73 00:02:35,477 --> 00:02:37,014 Trick‐or‐treat! 74 00:02:37,080 --> 00:02:38,283 GENE AND TINA: Trick‐or‐treat. 75 00:02:38,349 --> 00:02:41,022 One for you, one for you, and one for you. 76 00:02:41,088 --> 00:02:42,625 Um, aren't you forgetting something? 77 00:02:42,692 --> 00:02:44,228 Happy... Halloween? 78 00:02:44,295 --> 00:02:45,798 Guys, it's me, from last year. 79 00:02:45,865 --> 00:02:47,367 From when you ran out of candy, 80 00:02:47,434 --> 00:02:49,071 and you promised to make it up this year? 81 00:02:49,138 --> 00:02:51,209 Mm, no, I don't remember that. 82 00:02:51,275 --> 00:02:53,079 (laughs) You're messing with me. Good one. 83 00:02:53,146 --> 00:02:55,266 Okay, now go ahead and plop another candy into my bag. 84 00:02:55,317 --> 00:02:57,622 - Excuse me? - You guys owe me double candy. 85 00:02:57,689 --> 00:03:00,995 So, double me up. On the double. Let's go, double time. 86 00:03:01,062 --> 00:03:03,032 Okay, I think you should go now. 87 00:03:03,099 --> 00:03:05,437 Not without my candy! Let me at that bowl! 88 00:03:05,504 --> 00:03:08,677 You know what? Now we're gonna take this back. 89 00:03:08,744 --> 00:03:10,213 No! That's‐that's my property! 90 00:03:10,280 --> 00:03:13,687 This isn't over. This... isn't... over! 91 00:03:13,754 --> 00:03:15,625 - (all gasp) - TINA: Oh, no! Attack leopards! 92 00:03:15,691 --> 00:03:17,251 - (all whimpering) - (leopards growling) 93 00:03:17,294 --> 00:03:18,405 - (panting) - Aah! Get away! Get off me! 94 00:03:18,429 --> 00:03:19,766 There were attack leopards? 95 00:03:19,833 --> 00:03:21,637 I don't remember the attack leopards. 96 00:03:21,703 --> 00:03:23,984 - Shh, shh, shh, shush. You probably just blocked it out. - (phone ringing) 97 00:03:24,008 --> 00:03:25,912 Bob's Burgers. 98 00:03:25,978 --> 00:03:28,449 A‐a to‐go order? Uh, uh, wait. Let me get a pen. 99 00:03:28,517 --> 00:03:30,053 - Where's a pen? - Uh, pen, pen, pen. 100 00:03:30,120 --> 00:03:31,298 Want me to make one real quick? 101 00:03:31,322 --> 00:03:32,926 I got a bucket of paint in the truck. 102 00:03:32,992 --> 00:03:34,432 Can we have a quick snail conference? 103 00:03:34,495 --> 00:03:36,165 Louise, when I signed on for this costume, 104 00:03:36,232 --> 00:03:38,436 I was hoping to do some major sibling bonding. 105 00:03:38,504 --> 00:03:40,073 - And we will. - I guess I just thought, 106 00:03:40,140 --> 00:03:41,643 once we got inside the snail suit, 107 00:03:41,710 --> 00:03:43,279 you'd hopefully change your mind 108 00:03:43,346 --> 00:03:46,085 and maybe not want to steal an entire bowl of candy? 109 00:03:46,152 --> 00:03:47,922 Yeah, I don't want bad candy karma. 110 00:03:47,989 --> 00:03:49,926 Bup‐bup‐bup‐bup‐bup, not stealing. 111 00:03:49,993 --> 00:03:51,362 It's candy justice. 112 00:03:51,429 --> 00:03:53,166 Hey, when someone stiffs one of us, 113 00:03:53,232 --> 00:03:55,036 they stiff all of us, right, guys? 114 00:03:55,103 --> 00:03:57,341 - I... guess? - The Three Stiff‐ka‐teers. 115 00:03:57,407 --> 00:03:59,111 Don't worry your snail head about this. 116 00:03:59,178 --> 00:04:00,356 We're gonna walk up to their house. 117 00:04:00,380 --> 00:04:02,652 They open the door. They won't see our faces. 118 00:04:02,719 --> 00:04:04,321 Tina, you'll do all the talking. 119 00:04:04,388 --> 00:04:06,727 Distract them by commenting on their decor. 120 00:04:06,793 --> 00:04:08,897 Maybe something like the line we talked about. 121 00:04:08,964 --> 00:04:11,068 (sighs) "Check out that wall. 122 00:04:11,135 --> 00:04:13,106 "Where'd you get it? Walmart?" 123 00:04:13,172 --> 00:04:15,176 Exactly. Anyway, they'll start blabbering, 124 00:04:15,243 --> 00:04:17,114 I'll open the hatch and grab their candy bowl. 125 00:04:17,180 --> 00:04:19,184 - Justice served. - Uh... 126 00:04:19,251 --> 00:04:20,811 So I guess we're gonna deliver a burger. 127 00:04:20,855 --> 00:04:22,625 - We do that? - It's for someone staying 128 00:04:22,692 --> 00:04:24,132 at the hotel at the end of the block. 129 00:04:24,161 --> 00:04:26,032 It's so close, I just said "yes." 130 00:04:26,098 --> 00:04:28,002 Also, making money is... is good. 131 00:04:28,069 --> 00:04:30,006 - Right? - Attaboy, Bob. 132 00:04:30,073 --> 00:04:31,652 - Uh, we can deliver it for you, Dad. - Really? 133 00:04:31,676 --> 00:04:33,379 Yeah. And it's not at all because 134 00:04:33,446 --> 00:04:35,192 I'm putting off something that I really don't want to do. 135 00:04:35,216 --> 00:04:36,686 No, no, no, no, no. Sorry, Dad. 136 00:04:36,753 --> 00:04:38,524 We're busy. Nice try. 137 00:04:38,590 --> 00:04:41,062 - They might give us a tip. - Okay, we'll do it. 138 00:04:41,128 --> 00:04:43,534 I mean, who can resist tipping three adorable kids 139 00:04:43,600 --> 00:04:45,671 - with tip‐me face. - And tip‐me butt. 140 00:04:45,738 --> 00:04:47,240 ♪ Put the money in my bum‐bum. ♪ 141 00:04:47,307 --> 00:04:48,644 Gene. 142 00:04:52,117 --> 00:04:54,989 Hello? 143 00:04:55,056 --> 00:04:57,327 - Is anyone here? - TINA: I guess we should wait 144 00:04:57,394 --> 00:04:59,394 in the lobby for a hotel person to take the burger? 145 00:04:59,431 --> 00:05:02,972 Or we take it up ourselves to... room 313. 146 00:05:03,039 --> 00:05:05,443 'Cause we got to hustle. Candy justice awaits. 147 00:05:05,511 --> 00:05:07,423 Candy Justice sounds like a show about a stripper 148 00:05:07,447 --> 00:05:08,851 who's also a judge. 149 00:05:08,917 --> 00:05:11,790 (elevator bell dings) 150 00:05:11,857 --> 00:05:13,226 (lights buzzing) 151 00:05:13,292 --> 00:05:14,896 TINA: This isn't creepy at all. 152 00:05:14,963 --> 00:05:16,165 Really? 'Cause I have both 153 00:05:16,232 --> 00:05:18,069 the heebies and the jeebies. 154 00:05:18,136 --> 00:05:20,006 (lights buzzing) 155 00:05:20,073 --> 00:05:23,012 WOMAN (chanting): Regnum intrare spiritum. 156 00:05:23,079 --> 00:05:25,183 Regnum intrare spiritum. 157 00:05:25,250 --> 00:05:27,020 I go bye‐bye now. 158 00:05:27,087 --> 00:05:28,824 Hey, everyone gets excited about burgers 159 00:05:28,891 --> 00:05:30,995 in their own way. Also, tip money. 160 00:05:31,061 --> 00:05:32,397 Burger delivery. 161 00:05:32,464 --> 00:05:33,600 WOMAN: Enter. 162 00:05:33,667 --> 00:05:37,207 Regnum intrare spiritum. 163 00:05:37,274 --> 00:05:39,779 Oh, good. The bait's here. 164 00:05:39,846 --> 00:05:42,217 Uh, bait? Bait for what? 165 00:05:42,284 --> 00:05:44,856 - Come. Come in. - Are we the bait? 166 00:05:44,923 --> 00:05:47,027 I'm not baiting around to find out. 167 00:05:53,472 --> 00:05:55,243 (all screaming) 168 00:05:55,310 --> 00:05:56,212 - (Tina panting) - What the hell that was that? 169 00:05:56,278 --> 00:05:58,149 An elderly hippie demon lady? 170 00:05:58,216 --> 00:05:59,652 Okay, let's just put that behind us. 171 00:05:59,719 --> 00:06:01,155 It was unfortunate, 172 00:06:01,222 --> 00:06:02,768 but you know what makes everything better? 173 00:06:02,792 --> 00:06:05,931 - Dry underwear? - Candy. Let's go. Um, Gene, 174 00:06:05,998 --> 00:06:07,443 where's the snail‐shell part of the costume? 175 00:06:07,467 --> 00:06:09,906 Uh‐oh. I may have dropped it in creepy lady's room 176 00:06:09,973 --> 00:06:11,284 because I was scared and so were my hands? 177 00:06:11,308 --> 00:06:13,079 Damn it, Gene. We need that. 178 00:06:13,145 --> 00:06:16,018 That's what covers our faces. Ugh. We got to go back. 179 00:06:16,085 --> 00:06:17,855 Wait. What? Go back into there? 180 00:06:17,922 --> 00:06:20,426 Or we leave the shell part up there, 181 00:06:20,493 --> 00:06:23,065 we don't do your plan, and now our costume is a confident snail 182 00:06:23,132 --> 00:06:24,468 that's coming out of its shell? 183 00:06:24,535 --> 00:06:27,474 No, we're gonna get the shell, then everything's gonna be fine. 184 00:06:27,541 --> 00:06:29,746 For some of us. Ha‐ha‐ha. Kidding. 185 00:06:29,812 --> 00:06:32,317 For all of us. Tina, you go first. 186 00:06:34,722 --> 00:06:37,260 - (door closes) - Hello. - ALL: Aah! 187 00:06:37,327 --> 00:06:39,431 - Where'd you come from? - From right down here. 188 00:06:39,498 --> 00:06:41,144 I was bending over. So, are you trick‐or‐treating? 189 00:06:41,168 --> 00:06:43,105 We don't get a ton of trick‐or‐treaters, 190 00:06:43,172 --> 00:06:45,911 but we got a bunch of sewing kits or shower caps. 191 00:06:45,978 --> 00:06:48,115 - You look like shower‐cap kids. - Thank you. 192 00:06:48,182 --> 00:06:49,561 We were just here delivering a burger 193 00:06:49,585 --> 00:06:51,656 to a creepy old lady in room 313, 194 00:06:51,723 --> 00:06:54,127 but one of us dropped part of our costume in there. 195 00:06:54,194 --> 00:06:56,098 Ah, Dolores. (chuckles) 196 00:06:56,165 --> 00:06:57,635 I guess conjuring up the spirit 197 00:06:57,702 --> 00:06:59,180 of your dead lover can make you hungry. 198 00:06:59,204 --> 00:07:01,075 Wait. Did you say "Conjuring the spirit"? 199 00:07:01,141 --> 00:07:02,912 "Of her dead lover"? 200 00:07:02,978 --> 00:07:05,483 Yup. Dolores checks into room 313 201 00:07:05,551 --> 00:07:07,153 every Halloween to conjure him up. 202 00:07:07,220 --> 00:07:08,557 Brings in a lot of lookie‐loos. 203 00:07:08,623 --> 00:07:10,393 Good for business. 204 00:07:10,460 --> 00:07:12,039 Well, you should see us the rest of the year. 205 00:07:12,063 --> 00:07:14,000 - Hi, kids. - Oh, hi, Gus. 206 00:07:14,067 --> 00:07:16,305 - They were just asking about Dolores. - Yup. 207 00:07:16,372 --> 00:07:19,177 Dolores's lover died on Halloween night 208 00:07:19,244 --> 00:07:23,987 in room 313, 50 years ago, so she comes up here every year 209 00:07:24,054 --> 00:07:25,958 to conjure up Roger's spirit. 210 00:07:26,024 --> 00:07:27,862 - Aw. - A Roger conjure. 211 00:07:27,928 --> 00:07:29,474 And a bunch of us hang out in the lobby, 212 00:07:29,498 --> 00:07:32,170 take in the vibe, have a few drinks, 213 00:07:32,237 --> 00:07:33,940 and hope the ghost shows up. 214 00:07:34,007 --> 00:07:36,846 It's a haunted hoot. And, you know, Dolores would be 215 00:07:36,913 --> 00:07:39,217 an age‐appropriate match for Old Gus. 216 00:07:39,284 --> 00:07:40,821 Sorry, Gus. We're on the clock. 217 00:07:40,888 --> 00:07:42,023 So, can we mm...? 218 00:07:42,090 --> 00:07:44,394 Uh... 219 00:07:44,461 --> 00:07:47,902 Totally normal lady, it's us again. 220 00:07:47,968 --> 00:07:50,306 May I just grab that snail shell? Don't hurt me. 221 00:07:50,373 --> 00:07:51,810 Good luck on conjuring the spirit 222 00:07:51,876 --> 00:07:53,188 - of your dead lover. - Thank you. 223 00:07:53,212 --> 00:07:55,383 Does it work, by the way? I'm just curious. 224 00:07:55,450 --> 00:07:57,320 It hasn't worked yet, but hopefully, 225 00:07:57,387 --> 00:08:00,026 by adding his favorite food as bait‐‐ 226 00:08:00,092 --> 00:08:03,032 this cheeseburger‐‐ I can finally lure him here. 227 00:08:03,098 --> 00:08:04,468 Well, we're rooting for you two. 228 00:08:04,535 --> 00:08:05,971 And when he shows up, 229 00:08:06,038 --> 00:08:07,942 I'll banish him to hell for all eternity. 230 00:08:08,008 --> 00:08:09,444 - Huh? - What? - Whoa. 231 00:08:09,512 --> 00:08:11,649 Oh, crap. I hope Roger didn't hear that. 232 00:08:11,716 --> 00:08:14,354 Well, that sounds fun, but we got to snail‐trail out of here. 233 00:08:14,421 --> 00:08:15,991 Or maybe we can stay a little bit. 234 00:08:16,058 --> 00:08:17,661 I just want to catch some dark arts, 235 00:08:17,728 --> 00:08:19,073 - hear the damnation download. - Ugh. 236 00:08:19,097 --> 00:08:20,834 Okay, a minute. 237 00:08:20,901 --> 00:08:22,446 It's so great you're coming with us, Bob. 238 00:08:22,470 --> 00:08:24,407 I'm walking with you. 239 00:08:24,474 --> 00:08:26,546 I'm gonna look at the van because Teddy said 240 00:08:26,613 --> 00:08:28,024 he wouldn't leave unless I look at the van. 241 00:08:28,048 --> 00:08:29,752 Trust me, once you see what they did to it, 242 00:08:29,819 --> 00:08:31,823 you'll change your mind about donating blood. 243 00:08:31,890 --> 00:08:34,027 - TEDDY: Huh? - LINDA: Fun. 244 00:08:34,094 --> 00:08:36,900 (as Dracula): Welcome to Transyl‐vein‐ya. 245 00:08:36,966 --> 00:08:38,402 - Get it? - (as Dracula): Soon, 246 00:08:38,469 --> 00:08:41,074 we will drain you of one pint of your human blood. 247 00:08:41,141 --> 00:08:44,047 Then you can relax here and enjoy cookies and juice. 248 00:08:44,114 --> 00:08:45,717 (sighs) Oh, boy. 249 00:08:45,784 --> 00:08:47,096 Uh, okay, I saw it. Now I'm leaving. 250 00:08:47,120 --> 00:08:49,024 (coughs) O negative. 251 00:08:49,090 --> 00:08:51,428 - What? - (coughs) O negative. Mm‐hmm. 252 00:08:51,495 --> 00:08:52,965 O neg? Really? Uh... 253 00:08:53,032 --> 00:08:54,602 (as Dracula): Well, well, well. 254 00:08:54,669 --> 00:08:56,080 (as Dracula): It's not every day we get 255 00:08:56,104 --> 00:08:58,543 to suck a universal blood donor's blood. 256 00:08:58,610 --> 00:09:00,614 Wait, I‐I'm not donating blood. 257 00:09:00,681 --> 00:09:03,128 (normal voice): Huh, seriously? You're O neg, but you're not gonna donate? 258 00:09:03,152 --> 00:09:05,991 Sorry, guys, I just have a thing about blood and needles. 259 00:09:06,058 --> 00:09:08,897 You'll be fine. We work with needle weenies all the time. 260 00:09:08,964 --> 00:09:11,234 Uh, I‐I don't love that term. 261 00:09:11,301 --> 00:09:14,007 Hey, just think of how happy you could make someone. 262 00:09:14,074 --> 00:09:16,087 (in childish voice): Hey, mister, you saved my life, 263 00:09:16,111 --> 00:09:19,017 and now I'm gonna go out and save the rain forest. 264 00:09:19,084 --> 00:09:21,054 You're doing a lot of voices. 265 00:09:21,121 --> 00:09:23,459 Oh, no. I'm slipping away. 266 00:09:23,526 --> 00:09:26,131 Beep. Beep. Beep... 267 00:09:26,198 --> 00:09:28,135 - He's dying. - Somebody do something! 268 00:09:28,202 --> 00:09:30,641 Fine. I'll donate my really great blood. 269 00:09:30,707 --> 00:09:32,110 - Yay. - You just saved the boy 270 00:09:32,176 --> 00:09:33,880 who's gonna save the rain forest. 271 00:09:33,947 --> 00:09:35,149 What's the "rain forest"? 272 00:09:35,216 --> 00:09:36,986 LOUISE: So what did Roger do 273 00:09:37,053 --> 00:09:38,890 to deserve eternal damnation? 274 00:09:38,957 --> 00:09:40,727 Did he eat the last slice of pizza? 275 00:09:40,794 --> 00:09:42,296 Oh, it was a long time ago. 276 00:09:42,363 --> 00:09:43,900 We were young, we were dating. 277 00:09:43,967 --> 00:09:45,336 I hate him. 278 00:09:45,403 --> 00:09:47,306 We were edgy back then. 279 00:09:47,373 --> 00:09:50,179 We were even gonna try this new thing called "Thai food," 280 00:09:50,246 --> 00:09:53,185 but we had to leave 'cause Roger came down with a cold. 281 00:09:53,252 --> 00:09:56,592 Even coughing and sneezing, he was a handsome bastard. 282 00:09:56,659 --> 00:09:59,097 - Hot. I think? - But our last date was 283 00:09:59,164 --> 00:10:02,136 at the Halloween party in this hotel, 284 00:10:02,203 --> 00:10:03,506 50 years ago. 285 00:10:03,573 --> 00:10:06,178 Roger looked amazing as Spartacus. 286 00:10:06,244 --> 00:10:08,058 It seemed like we were in our own little world. 287 00:10:08,082 --> 00:10:11,689 He was tossing nuts into the air and catching them in his mouth 288 00:10:11,756 --> 00:10:13,201 - to impress me. - GENE: I'm impressed. 289 00:10:13,225 --> 00:10:16,733 I was, too. How do people do that? 290 00:10:16,799 --> 00:10:20,540 Roger went to get us drinks, and he never came back. 291 00:10:20,607 --> 00:10:23,713 - What? - I asked around, if anyone's seen Spartacus. 292 00:10:23,780 --> 00:10:25,984 People kept saying, "I am Spartacus," 293 00:10:26,051 --> 00:10:27,320 but I hadn't seen the movie, 294 00:10:27,386 --> 00:10:28,733 so I didn't know what they were referring to. 295 00:10:28,757 --> 00:10:30,994 Finally, someone told me that 296 00:10:31,061 --> 00:10:34,200 they saw him at the elevator with I Dream of Jeannie. 297 00:10:34,267 --> 00:10:35,369 I couldn't believe it. 298 00:10:35,436 --> 00:10:37,006 I was devastated. 299 00:10:37,073 --> 00:10:41,214 The next day, I read in the paper that he'd died 300 00:10:41,281 --> 00:10:42,951 in this very room. 301 00:10:43,018 --> 00:10:44,120 He was murdered? 302 00:10:44,187 --> 00:10:45,624 No, it was cardiac arrest. 303 00:10:45,690 --> 00:10:47,628 There was no sign of foul play, 304 00:10:47,694 --> 00:10:50,032 but I bet there was some foreplay, the creep. 305 00:10:50,099 --> 00:10:53,071 They canoodled, she left, and then he died. 306 00:10:53,138 --> 00:10:54,207 Typical man. 307 00:10:54,274 --> 00:10:56,311 And so, every year since, 308 00:10:56,378 --> 00:10:59,885 I've come here to conjure that no‐good, 309 00:10:59,952 --> 00:11:01,254 cheating S. O. B.'s spirit 310 00:11:01,321 --> 00:11:03,392 and send it to hell! 311 00:11:03,458 --> 00:11:06,498 I mean, wasn't him dying kind of enough of a punishment? 312 00:11:06,566 --> 00:11:08,035 Hell just seems like kind of a lot. 313 00:11:08,101 --> 00:11:09,237 And so sweaty. 314 00:11:09,304 --> 00:11:11,341 Tina, let her have it. I get it. 315 00:11:11,408 --> 00:11:13,054 I got my own little vendetta going on tonight. 316 00:11:13,078 --> 00:11:14,447 Can't you both just move on? 317 00:11:14,515 --> 00:11:17,053 Halloween's about forgiveness... I think. 318 00:11:17,119 --> 00:11:19,758 Forgiveness and Frankenstein‐‐ the two Fs. 319 00:11:19,825 --> 00:11:21,361 Yeah, so maybe forgive this guy 320 00:11:21,428 --> 00:11:23,398 who wrote you what looks like 10,000 love letters. 321 00:11:23,465 --> 00:11:25,369 - (scoffs) - "Dear Glorious Dolores, 322 00:11:25,436 --> 00:11:28,075 "I was thinking of you today, and it made me think of you‐‐ 323 00:11:28,141 --> 00:11:31,047 "your smell, your neck parts, the way your eyes light up 324 00:11:31,114 --> 00:11:32,784 when I smell your neck parts." 325 00:11:32,851 --> 00:11:34,865 Dolores, this doesn't sound like a cheater wrote it. 326 00:11:34,889 --> 00:11:36,124 A cheater did write it. 327 00:11:36,191 --> 00:11:38,161 But what if what you think happened didn't happen? 328 00:11:38,228 --> 00:11:39,999 What if there's another explanation? 329 00:11:40,065 --> 00:11:42,103 Okay, Miss I Just Walked in Here with a Burger 330 00:11:42,169 --> 00:11:43,806 and Now I Know Everything." 331 00:11:43,873 --> 00:11:46,077 Yeah, knock it off, Stally Parton. 332 00:11:46,144 --> 00:11:48,148 We've got to go see a Ven about a Detta. 333 00:11:48,215 --> 00:11:49,752 (groans) I don't want to vendetta. 334 00:11:49,818 --> 00:11:51,565 And I don't think Dolores should vendetta, either. 335 00:11:51,589 --> 00:11:53,860 - I mean, isn't it possible Roger is innocent? - No. 336 00:11:53,927 --> 00:11:55,296 - But maybe? - No! 337 00:11:55,362 --> 00:11:57,075 But what if there was a way to figure out that he didn't cheat? 338 00:11:57,099 --> 00:11:58,670 There's not, so drop it. 339 00:11:58,736 --> 00:12:01,709 Yeah, Tina, drop it so we can go pick‐up some stinkin' candy! 340 00:12:01,776 --> 00:12:02,945 Wait, how about this? 341 00:12:03,011 --> 00:12:04,648 Give me a chance‐‐ it's still early. 342 00:12:04,715 --> 00:12:06,327 If I can't figure it out, I'll go do your plan. 343 00:12:06,351 --> 00:12:08,088 Sounds good. I like that. 344 00:12:08,155 --> 00:12:10,268 But if I can, then we go trick‐or‐treating like normal. 345 00:12:10,292 --> 00:12:11,629 No vendettas, just candy. 346 00:12:11,696 --> 00:12:13,065 Ooh, I like that. 347 00:12:13,131 --> 00:12:14,067 So what do you say? 348 00:12:14,133 --> 00:12:16,071 I say you're on, you poor romantic idiot. 349 00:12:16,137 --> 00:12:17,073 Oh, my! 350 00:12:17,139 --> 00:12:19,177 This one's not rated PG‐13. 351 00:12:19,243 --> 00:12:20,547 - Give me that. - (chuckles): Oh. 352 00:12:25,155 --> 00:12:26,367 WOMAN (gasps): I just got cold, right? 353 00:12:26,391 --> 00:12:27,670 Is it cold in here? Ghost‐y cold? 354 00:12:27,694 --> 00:12:29,030 Could be ghost‐y cold. 355 00:12:29,097 --> 00:12:30,499 Ah, this is gonna be the year. 356 00:12:30,567 --> 00:12:32,136 I bought this camera online. 357 00:12:32,203 --> 00:12:33,673 It can take pictures of apparitions. 358 00:12:33,740 --> 00:12:34,675 And Jupiter. 359 00:12:34,742 --> 00:12:35,742 Jupiter's my cat. 360 00:12:35,777 --> 00:12:37,113 Okay. So, it's not great 361 00:12:37,179 --> 00:12:39,450 that Dolores kicked us out of her room to keep conjuring. 362 00:12:39,518 --> 00:12:41,565 But at least she let us keep some letters and photos. 363 00:12:41,589 --> 00:12:43,626 - Hot leads here, I betcha. - Come on, Tina. 364 00:12:43,693 --> 00:12:45,964 Give up, and let's go get that bowl of candy 365 00:12:46,031 --> 00:12:47,333 while there's still candy in it. 366 00:12:47,400 --> 00:12:49,638 No. I'm gonna prove Roger's not a cheater, 367 00:12:49,705 --> 00:12:50,783 and then we're gonna trick‐or‐treat 368 00:12:50,807 --> 00:12:52,209 without committing any candy crimes. 369 00:12:52,276 --> 00:12:54,147 Okay. So, here's a group photo. 370 00:12:54,213 --> 00:12:55,817 Halloween night, 50 years ago. 371 00:12:55,884 --> 00:12:57,921 And there's I Dream of Jeannie, the temptress. 372 00:12:57,988 --> 00:12:59,157 But who was she? 373 00:12:59,223 --> 00:13:00,159 GENE She's tall, 374 00:13:00,225 --> 00:13:01,762 likes big, boxy belt buckles, 375 00:13:01,829 --> 00:13:03,298 - BBBBs. - Yeah, what's up 376 00:13:03,365 --> 00:13:04,601 with that boxy belt buckle? 377 00:13:04,668 --> 00:13:06,004 It's not very genie‐ish. 378 00:13:06,071 --> 00:13:08,008 Kinda just looks like the belt buckle of someone 379 00:13:08,075 --> 00:13:10,179 - who steals someone's boyfriend. - (door opens) 380 00:13:10,245 --> 00:13:12,092 Did I miss anything? Any sightings? Any cold spots? 381 00:13:12,116 --> 00:13:13,886 I felt a cold spot. Didn't I just say that? 382 00:13:13,953 --> 00:13:15,122 I think I just said that. 383 00:13:15,189 --> 00:13:16,709 I think you might just be underdressed? 384 00:13:16,759 --> 00:13:19,363 You guys seem a little young to be conjuring enthusiasts. 385 00:13:19,430 --> 00:13:21,134 Oh, no, some of us are trying to prove 386 00:13:21,201 --> 00:13:23,171 that Dolores's theory about Roger is wrong. 387 00:13:23,238 --> 00:13:25,142 Wait a minute, you think Roger wasn't 388 00:13:25,209 --> 00:13:26,512 a cheating cheat‐face cheater? 389 00:13:26,579 --> 00:13:27,814 I know. It's ridiculous. 390 00:13:27,881 --> 00:13:29,426 It's not ridiculous, and I'm gonna prove it, 391 00:13:29,450 --> 00:13:31,154 if I can just concentrate for a second. 392 00:13:31,221 --> 00:13:34,360 Uh, but, uh, can that wait until after she conjures Roger? 393 00:13:34,427 --> 00:13:35,763 I kinda told everyone at work 394 00:13:35,830 --> 00:13:38,168 that I was gonna take a picture of a ghost. 395 00:13:38,235 --> 00:13:39,738 - (whimpering) - Okay. We're all set. 396 00:13:39,805 --> 00:13:41,107 Now it's time for‐‐ Hey! 397 00:13:41,174 --> 00:13:42,944 That's an amazing Big Bird costume. 398 00:13:43,011 --> 00:13:43,946 (squeals) 399 00:13:44,013 --> 00:13:44,948 - You felt that? - Yes! 400 00:13:45,015 --> 00:13:45,950 But I distracted you. 401 00:13:46,017 --> 00:13:47,186 My arm still feels it 402 00:13:47,253 --> 00:13:48,188 when you shove a needle in it! 403 00:13:48,255 --> 00:13:49,190 (sighs): Oh, boy. 404 00:13:49,257 --> 00:13:50,593 - Uh, what? - (groans) 405 00:13:50,660 --> 00:13:52,129 Looks like I didn't find a vein. 406 00:13:52,196 --> 00:13:54,009 - I'm gonna have to try it again. - (weakly): What? 407 00:13:54,033 --> 00:13:56,070 Hey, uh, look at that, uh, Star Wars costume. 408 00:13:56,137 --> 00:13:57,439 - Space, am I right? - (squeals) 409 00:13:57,507 --> 00:13:59,578 - Did you get it? - No, nope, nope. Not in. 410 00:13:59,645 --> 00:14:01,314 Your veins roll away from the needle. 411 00:14:01,381 --> 00:14:02,817 (woozy gurgling) 412 00:14:02,884 --> 00:14:04,764 It's like your veins are playing hard to get, Bob. 413 00:14:04,788 --> 00:14:05,890 Not like mine. 414 00:14:05,957 --> 00:14:07,894 The needle slid right into my beefy vein. 415 00:14:07,961 --> 00:14:09,598 ‐(gurgling) ‐(groans) 416 00:14:09,665 --> 00:14:10,900 Let's try the other arm. 417 00:14:10,967 --> 00:14:12,604 Okay, really make a fist this time. 418 00:14:12,671 --> 00:14:14,006 Hey! Oh, look. There! 419 00:14:14,073 --> 00:14:16,010 ‐(squeals) ‐(groans) Damn it. 420 00:14:16,077 --> 00:14:18,048 You said you were very good with needle weenies. 421 00:14:18,114 --> 00:14:20,085 You're the worst weenie I've ever had. 422 00:14:20,152 --> 00:14:21,889 This is ridiculous. 423 00:14:21,956 --> 00:14:24,076 It's Halloween, and all I've got is this bowl of nuts. 424 00:14:24,126 --> 00:14:25,195 (chewing) 425 00:14:25,262 --> 00:14:27,601 Uh, I‐I feel totally close to a‐a breakthrough. 426 00:14:27,667 --> 00:14:29,070 (chewing) Well, now I'm thirsty. 427 00:14:29,136 --> 00:14:31,875 Do you think the barkeep knows his way around a ginger ale? 428 00:14:31,942 --> 00:14:34,142 Wait, Roger went to get drinks after he was eating nuts. 429 00:14:34,180 --> 00:14:35,325 (gasps dramatically) Oh, my God, Tina. 430 00:14:35,349 --> 00:14:37,821 You mean salty peanuts made someone thirsty? 431 00:14:37,887 --> 00:14:40,158 Are we on CSI: Salty Nut Unit? 432 00:14:40,225 --> 00:14:42,129 Dumb investigation time is over. 433 00:14:42,196 --> 00:14:43,265 It's candy bowl o'clock. 434 00:14:43,331 --> 00:14:44,801 - Let's go. - No, I'm so close. 435 00:14:44,868 --> 00:14:46,715 I just need to look at that dang group photo again. 436 00:14:46,739 --> 00:14:48,141 The photo, 437 00:14:48,208 --> 00:14:49,687 - the letters‐‐ they're gone! - (gasping) 438 00:14:49,711 --> 00:14:51,314 Okay, that is odd. 439 00:14:51,381 --> 00:14:52,316 What the heck? 440 00:14:52,383 --> 00:14:54,120 Now I really need a ginger ale. 441 00:14:54,186 --> 00:14:55,757 Antonio, make it a double! 442 00:15:00,265 --> 00:15:01,702 So, someone took my photo? 443 00:15:01,769 --> 00:15:03,471 And Roger's letters? Why? 444 00:15:03,539 --> 00:15:04,775 Maybe it was Ken Burns. 445 00:15:04,841 --> 00:15:06,477 He loves old photos and letters. 446 00:15:06,545 --> 00:15:07,947 Guess what, people, you mess 447 00:15:08,014 --> 00:15:10,052 with the snail head, you mess with the snail tail. 448 00:15:10,118 --> 00:15:12,456 And now the snail tail wants some answers. 449 00:15:12,524 --> 00:15:14,293 Thanks, Louise. Maybe someone didn't want us 450 00:15:14,360 --> 00:15:15,563 to find out the truth, 451 00:15:15,630 --> 00:15:17,967 didn't want Dolores to stop coming around. 452 00:15:18,034 --> 00:15:19,146 Yeah, maybe someone who wanted Dolores 453 00:15:19,170 --> 00:15:21,240 to keep trying to conjure up Roger 454 00:15:21,307 --> 00:15:23,646 so they could say they saw a ghost and take 455 00:15:23,713 --> 00:15:24,915 - a picture. - Huh? 456 00:15:24,981 --> 00:15:26,685 - Or was it you, Gus? - Oh, my! 457 00:15:26,752 --> 00:15:28,331 Maybe you don't want Dolores to stop coming in here 458 00:15:28,355 --> 00:15:29,534 'cause maybe you have a little crush. 459 00:15:29,558 --> 00:15:31,595 What? Oh, I'm‐I'm blushing. 460 00:15:31,662 --> 00:15:33,098 But I didn't take anything. 461 00:15:33,164 --> 00:15:34,601 Maybe it was that guy. 462 00:15:34,668 --> 00:15:37,005 What? I'm on my way to a party. 463 00:15:37,072 --> 00:15:39,143 I only came in to use the little bees' room. 464 00:15:39,210 --> 00:15:41,047 I did. It went great. 465 00:15:41,114 --> 00:15:42,258 I'm glad those aren't real bees. 466 00:15:42,282 --> 00:15:45,155 'Cause if I got stung, I'd "bee" in the hospital. 467 00:15:45,222 --> 00:15:47,059 With anaphylactic shock. (chuckles) 468 00:15:47,126 --> 00:15:48,328 I'm seriously allergic. 469 00:15:48,395 --> 00:15:50,132 And bathrooms are for customers only. 470 00:15:50,198 --> 00:15:52,336 - Next time. Can't undo it. - Wait a minute. 471 00:15:52,403 --> 00:15:54,808 Maybe it was you, Mr. Manager. 472 00:15:54,875 --> 00:15:56,812 ‐(yelps) ‐You get more business 473 00:15:56,879 --> 00:15:59,216 if Dolores keeps coming here year after year. 474 00:15:59,283 --> 00:16:00,753 (gasps) That's true. 475 00:16:00,820 --> 00:16:02,791 - Of course. - It wasn't me. 476 00:16:02,857 --> 00:16:05,095 Sure, Dolores brings a Halloween bump in business, 477 00:16:05,162 --> 00:16:07,600 but that doesn't mean I'd mess with your totally 478 00:16:07,667 --> 00:16:10,105 not annoying investigation to keep people coming here. 479 00:16:10,172 --> 00:16:12,677 Aah! Well, no one leaves until we figure this out. 480 00:16:12,744 --> 00:16:13,679 I'm leaving. 481 00:16:13,746 --> 00:16:15,182 Oh, yeah, you can go. 482 00:16:15,248 --> 00:16:17,186 ‐(laughing) ‐(music playing) 483 00:16:17,252 --> 00:16:20,158 ♪ Nothing having to do with blood is happening ♪ 484 00:16:20,225 --> 00:16:22,530 ♪ I'm just sittin' in a chair ♪ 485 00:16:22,597 --> 00:16:26,538 ♪ And I'm not lookin' at anything at all. ♪ 486 00:16:26,605 --> 00:16:29,009 (woozy): Oh, no. 487 00:16:29,076 --> 00:16:31,147 (exhales) What happened? 488 00:16:31,214 --> 00:16:32,851 Oh, oh... (gurgles) 489 00:16:32,917 --> 00:16:35,857 (grunts) I‐I got to be done by now. 490 00:16:35,923 --> 00:16:36,992 Hello? 491 00:16:37,059 --> 00:16:38,996 I‐I‐I think I'm all done! 492 00:16:39,063 --> 00:16:42,002 Hey, I need someone to take this needle out of my arm! 493 00:16:42,069 --> 00:16:44,006 (laughing) 494 00:16:44,073 --> 00:16:45,073 It's getting too full. 495 00:16:45,108 --> 00:16:46,745 It's gonna take all my blood. 496 00:16:46,812 --> 00:16:48,014 (panting): Oh, God. 497 00:16:48,081 --> 00:16:49,350 I got to get out of here. 498 00:16:49,416 --> 00:16:51,220 Okay, I'm just gonna rip this out of my arm. 499 00:16:51,287 --> 00:16:53,224 No! No, I'm not. 500 00:16:53,291 --> 00:16:56,464 I got to get help. Mm... 501 00:16:56,532 --> 00:16:58,702 (gasps) Okay, okay. 502 00:16:58,769 --> 00:17:00,238 Ev‐Everything's coming with me. 503 00:17:00,305 --> 00:17:02,175 (inhales, exhales) I can do this. 504 00:17:02,242 --> 00:17:03,579 (inhales deeply, exhales) 505 00:17:03,646 --> 00:17:06,585 (gurgling, grunting) 506 00:17:06,652 --> 00:17:08,021 Almost there. (grunts) 507 00:17:08,087 --> 00:17:09,925 Oh, come on. (grunting, gurgling) 508 00:17:09,991 --> 00:17:11,327 (screams) 509 00:17:11,394 --> 00:17:12,897 (gurgles) 510 00:17:12,964 --> 00:17:14,701 Okay, let's run through what happened. 511 00:17:14,768 --> 00:17:17,072 Roger caught peanuts in his mouth, which is very cool. 512 00:17:17,139 --> 00:17:19,109 - And sexy. - It's okay. 513 00:17:19,176 --> 00:17:20,489 He then leaves you to go get drinks. 514 00:17:20,513 --> 00:17:21,715 The next thing we know, 515 00:17:21,782 --> 00:17:24,086 he's seen by the elevator with I Dream of Jeannie? 516 00:17:24,153 --> 00:17:26,525 And in the morning, he's found dead of cardiac arrest. 517 00:17:26,592 --> 00:17:27,927 Huh. Peanuts. 518 00:17:27,994 --> 00:17:29,430 Drinks. Cardiac arrest. 519 00:17:29,496 --> 00:17:31,100 I still think the bee guy did it. 520 00:17:31,167 --> 00:17:32,637 - (gasps) That's it! - I'm right?! 521 00:17:32,704 --> 00:17:33,872 - No! - (grumbles) 522 00:17:33,939 --> 00:17:35,141 Anaphylactic shock! 523 00:17:35,208 --> 00:17:36,110 He's allergic to bees. 524 00:17:36,177 --> 00:17:38,081 Roger was allergic to peanuts! 525 00:17:38,147 --> 00:17:40,094 Think about it. Their date at the Thai restaurant. 526 00:17:40,118 --> 00:17:41,555 He came down with a sudden cold? 527 00:17:41,622 --> 00:17:43,091 Thai food is super peanut‐y. 528 00:17:43,157 --> 00:17:44,928 And the night he died, he was eating nuts. 529 00:17:44,995 --> 00:17:46,106 But he died of a heart attack. 530 00:17:46,130 --> 00:17:48,434 Well, maybe an allergic reaction can cause that? 531 00:17:48,502 --> 00:17:50,238 It can. Oh, baby, it can. 532 00:17:50,305 --> 00:17:51,742 If he was allergic, 533 00:17:51,808 --> 00:17:54,113 why was he catching all those peanuts in his mouth? 534 00:17:54,179 --> 00:17:57,019 Really showboating, getting me all worked up. 535 00:17:57,085 --> 00:17:58,656 Well, he probably didn't realize it. 536 00:17:58,722 --> 00:18:00,526 Allergies can come on later in life. 537 00:18:00,593 --> 00:18:03,131 When I was in my 20s, I was all about bees. 538 00:18:03,197 --> 00:18:05,101 I used to catch 'em and shake 'em. 539 00:18:05,168 --> 00:18:06,938 But that still doesn't explain 540 00:18:07,005 --> 00:18:09,109 why Roger went upstairs with I Dream of Jeannie. 541 00:18:09,176 --> 00:18:10,412 Which is why I want to look 542 00:18:10,478 --> 00:18:11,982 at the group photo that someone stole. 543 00:18:12,049 --> 00:18:14,788 - And that someone is Dolores! - (gasping) 544 00:18:14,854 --> 00:18:17,159 But, but how did you know? 545 00:18:17,225 --> 00:18:18,161 It was a hunch. 546 00:18:18,227 --> 00:18:19,129 And then I saw the photo sticking out 547 00:18:19,196 --> 00:18:20,131 of the back of your pants. 548 00:18:20,198 --> 00:18:21,635 Oh. You can see this? 549 00:18:21,702 --> 00:18:23,972 Wait, you took the photo and the letters? 550 00:18:24,039 --> 00:18:26,845 Yes. And it's my own damn business why I did it. 551 00:18:26,912 --> 00:18:27,847 TINA: I Dream of Jeannie. 552 00:18:27,914 --> 00:18:29,116 She's the final piece. 553 00:18:29,183 --> 00:18:30,351 Who was she? 554 00:18:30,418 --> 00:18:32,255 Or, possibly, who was "he"? 555 00:18:32,322 --> 00:18:33,525 - Huh? - Look. 556 00:18:33,592 --> 00:18:35,996 That's an Adam's apple that we didn't notice 557 00:18:36,063 --> 00:18:37,303 'cause someone stole the photo. 558 00:18:37,365 --> 00:18:39,303 And knuckle hair that looks like shag carpet. 559 00:18:39,369 --> 00:18:40,706 And why's he wearing a pager? 560 00:18:40,773 --> 00:18:42,175 (gasps) That thing's a pager? 561 00:18:42,242 --> 00:18:44,514 GUS: Yeah. That's how pagers looked back then. 562 00:18:44,581 --> 00:18:46,518 I had one when I owned this town. 563 00:18:46,585 --> 00:18:48,154 This was all my turf. 564 00:18:48,221 --> 00:18:49,156 I was untouchable. 565 00:18:49,223 --> 00:18:50,993 They called me Payday. I‐‐ 566 00:18:51,060 --> 00:18:53,364 I mean, when I was a‐a bike messenger. 567 00:18:53,431 --> 00:18:55,168 I bet I Dream of Jeannie was a doctor. 568 00:18:55,235 --> 00:18:56,571 They used to have male doctors. 569 00:18:56,638 --> 00:18:58,074 And I bet he was helping Roger, 570 00:18:58,141 --> 00:18:59,854 because Roger was having an allergic reaction. 571 00:18:59,878 --> 00:19:02,650 Tina, I think your stupid story might be right. 572 00:19:02,717 --> 00:19:04,630 Roger ate some peanuts, started getting symptoms. 573 00:19:04,654 --> 00:19:05,990 TINA: He goes to the bar. 574 00:19:06,056 --> 00:19:07,056 He's sweaty, woozy. 575 00:19:07,092 --> 00:19:08,427 And Dr. Jeannie‐Man notices 576 00:19:08,494 --> 00:19:10,431 and says maybe he needs to lie down, so... 577 00:19:10,498 --> 00:19:12,880 LOUISE: He helps Roger to the elevatr so he can go to his room 578 00:19:12,904 --> 00:19:13,972 and get some rest. 579 00:19:14,039 --> 00:19:15,585 Maybe they didn't know about peanut allergies. 580 00:19:15,609 --> 00:19:17,489 Male doctors probably weren't that good back then. 581 00:19:17,513 --> 00:19:19,349 My poor Roger. 582 00:19:19,416 --> 00:19:21,220 He didn't cheat on me. 583 00:19:21,287 --> 00:19:23,157 At least he died doing what he loved, 584 00:19:23,224 --> 00:19:26,063 eating peanuts in a hotel lobby. 585 00:19:26,130 --> 00:19:28,000 (laughs) You full‐bottom‐ists. 586 00:19:28,067 --> 00:19:30,004 - You're a hoot! - It's "phlebotomist." 587 00:19:30,071 --> 00:19:31,373 - What did I say? - Well, uh, 588 00:19:31,440 --> 00:19:33,044 Bob should be about finished. 589 00:19:33,110 --> 00:19:34,981 Oh, no. Oh, no, no, no, no. 590 00:19:35,048 --> 00:19:36,651 What? What‐what is it? 591 00:19:36,718 --> 00:19:38,421 ‐(woozy groaning) ‐Oh, crap. 592 00:19:38,487 --> 00:19:40,358 Here, let me, uh, clean you up a little bit. 593 00:19:40,425 --> 00:19:42,095 And I'll give you extra cookies 594 00:19:42,162 --> 00:19:43,440 if you don't tell anybody about this. 595 00:19:43,464 --> 00:19:44,701 (weakly): Huh. Okay. 596 00:19:44,767 --> 00:19:45,703 That's fair. 597 00:19:45,769 --> 00:19:46,838 Congratulations, Bob. 598 00:19:46,905 --> 00:19:48,441 You donated blood one time. 599 00:19:48,508 --> 00:19:50,078 Come on, let's hear it for Bob! 600 00:19:50,144 --> 00:19:51,681 - Everybody! - (mouth full): I did it. 601 00:19:51,748 --> 00:19:54,052 - Yes, you did. - I can do anything. 602 00:19:54,119 --> 00:19:56,791 I saved your life! I saved your life! 603 00:19:56,858 --> 00:19:58,528 I‐I got to sit down. 604 00:19:58,595 --> 00:20:01,735 So why did you take the photo and the letters, Dolores? 605 00:20:01,801 --> 00:20:04,641 Oh, I was having a cocktail at the bar. 606 00:20:04,707 --> 00:20:06,878 I needed a little conjuring break. 607 00:20:06,945 --> 00:20:09,449 And I overheard you talking and I suddenly thought, 608 00:20:09,517 --> 00:20:11,296 "What if this was all just a huge waste of time? 609 00:20:11,320 --> 00:20:12,890 What if she's right?" 610 00:20:12,957 --> 00:20:13,892 And she was. 611 00:20:13,959 --> 00:20:14,894 About you. 612 00:20:14,961 --> 00:20:16,497 And maybe about me, too. 613 00:20:16,564 --> 00:20:18,234 I feel like a fool. 614 00:20:18,301 --> 00:20:19,469 Makes sense. Sorry. 615 00:20:19,537 --> 00:20:22,275 Roger, I'm so sorry. 616 00:20:22,342 --> 00:20:24,313 I mean, it's sorta romantic. 617 00:20:24,379 --> 00:20:25,849 In your own twisted way, 618 00:20:25,916 --> 00:20:27,319 you loved Roger so much 619 00:20:27,385 --> 00:20:30,024 that you kept this thing going for 50 years. 620 00:20:30,091 --> 00:20:31,136 A‐And just to put this out there, 621 00:20:31,160 --> 00:20:33,030 Gus might still be in the lobby. 622 00:20:33,097 --> 00:20:34,834 - Not a bad rebound guy. - Hmm. 623 00:20:34,901 --> 00:20:36,470 I'd like to see that guy catch a nut. 624 00:20:36,538 --> 00:20:37,538 (wind hissing) 625 00:20:37,573 --> 00:20:39,944 Oh, now you decide to come, Roger? 626 00:20:40,011 --> 00:20:42,048 - Whoa. - Someone's jealous. 627 00:20:42,115 --> 00:20:43,494 So I guess this means I lose our bet 628 00:20:43,518 --> 00:20:45,021 and we won't do my amazing plan? 629 00:20:45,088 --> 00:20:46,858 Yep. Just treats, no tricks. 630 00:20:46,925 --> 00:20:48,504 - Let's get out there, huh? - Sure, sure, sure. 631 00:20:48,528 --> 00:20:50,031 But what if we go to that house, 632 00:20:50,098 --> 00:20:52,168 we totally just get candy normally, 633 00:20:52,235 --> 00:20:54,473 and we open the fart hatch and Gene does a little fart? 634 00:20:54,540 --> 00:20:56,878 - Nope. - Okay, so I just fart inside the snail 635 00:20:56,945 --> 00:20:58,214 and we all die like Roger? 636 00:20:58,280 --> 00:21:01,153 Too soon. Actually, no, it's not. 637 00:21:01,220 --> 00:21:04,026 ♪ I went on down to the party next door ♪ 638 00:21:04,092 --> 00:21:07,432 ♪ The music sounded groovy, and I wanted more ♪ 639 00:21:07,499 --> 00:21:10,438 ♪ Then, at the end, that's when things got weird ♪ 640 00:21:10,506 --> 00:21:13,310 ♪ 'Cause everyone there had been dead for years ♪ 641 00:21:13,377 --> 00:21:16,684 - ♪ It was a spooky soiree ♪ - ♪ La, la, la, la ♪ 642 00:21:16,751 --> 00:21:18,487 ♪ Those ghouls could shimmy and shake ♪ 643 00:21:18,555 --> 00:21:19,957 ♪ La, la, la, la ♪ 644 00:21:20,024 --> 00:21:22,028 ♪ It was a spooky soiree ♪ 645 00:21:22,095 --> 00:21:23,330 ♪ La, la, la, la ♪ 646 00:21:23,397 --> 00:21:25,201 ♪ They're dancin' back from the grave ♪ 647 00:21:25,268 --> 00:21:26,971 ♪ La, la, la, la ♪ 648 00:21:27,038 --> 00:21:28,575 ♪ That guy's dead and that guy's dead ♪ 649 00:21:28,642 --> 00:21:30,178 ♪ That lady died peacefully in bed ♪ 650 00:21:30,244 --> 00:21:32,182 ♪ That guy doin' the boogaloo ♪ 651 00:21:32,248 --> 00:21:34,252 ♪ Pretty darn sure that he's dead, too. ♪ 49614

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