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1
00:00:06,637 --> 00:00:08,307
GREAT NEWS, EVERYBODY!
2
00:00:08,309 --> 00:00:11,179
THIS YEAR FOR ONCE,
I DON'T HAVE TO WORK
ON THANKSGIVING.
3
00:00:11,182 --> 00:00:12,682
( family cheers )
4
00:00:12,683 --> 00:00:15,353
- SO WE CAN ALL BE TOGETHER!
- ( cheering )
5
00:00:15,346 --> 00:00:17,186
AND I CAN COOK
THANKSGIVING DINNER.
6
00:00:17,188 --> 00:00:19,188
- Teddy: ALL RIGHT.
- Bob: ( weakly ) YAY.
7
00:00:22,593 --> 00:00:24,763
OKAY, WHAT HAPPENED THERE?
8
00:00:24,755 --> 00:00:26,595
HONEY, COME ON,
IT'S JUST THAT COOKING
9
00:00:26,597 --> 00:00:28,157
THANKSGIVING DINNER
IS A LOT OF WORK.
10
00:00:28,159 --> 00:00:30,529
YEAH, ARE YOU SURE
WE SHOULDN'T JUST
EAT OUT?
11
00:00:30,531 --> 00:00:32,461
I MEAN, FOR YOUR SAKE.
12
00:00:32,463 --> 00:00:34,213
NO WAY.
13
00:00:34,205 --> 00:00:36,435
EVERY THANKSGIVING I HAVE
TO EAT TURKEY SANDWICHES
14
00:00:36,437 --> 00:00:38,237
OUT OF THE HOSPITAL
VENDING MACHINE
15
00:00:38,239 --> 00:00:40,339
AND YOU GUYS HAVE TO GO
TO THE OLD TIME BUFFET.
16
00:00:40,341 --> 00:00:42,641
THIS YEAR WE'RE
GONNA BE TOGETHER,
17
00:00:42,643 --> 00:00:44,653
AND I AM GONNA COOK.
18
00:00:44,645 --> 00:00:47,675
OLD TIME BUFFET OFFERS
QUALITY AND VALUE.
19
00:00:49,620 --> 00:00:53,180
YEAH, AND THEIR
CHICKEN FINGERS, MWAH!
20
00:00:53,184 --> 00:00:54,834
RIGHT?
21
00:00:54,825 --> 00:00:58,155
WE ARE HAVING DINNER HERE
AND THAT IS FINAL.
22
00:00:58,159 --> 00:01:01,559
ALL RIGHT, OKAY.
23
00:01:01,562 --> 00:01:04,172
ACTUALLY, YOU KNOW,
I HAVE A THANKSGIVING
ANNOUNCEMENT.
24
00:01:04,165 --> 00:01:06,535
THIS YEAR WE ARE
GOING TO BE JOINED
BY GRANDPA.
25
00:01:06,537 --> 00:01:08,367
( cheering )
26
00:01:08,369 --> 00:01:10,139
GRANDPA DUNCAN.
27
00:01:10,141 --> 00:01:11,601
YEAH.
28
00:01:13,704 --> 00:01:15,614
HURTS, DOESN'T IT?
29
00:01:15,606 --> 00:01:18,606
( sighs )
OH, COME ON, YOU GUYS.
30
00:01:18,609 --> 00:01:21,649
- MY DAD HAS SOME
GOOD QUALITIES.
- SUCH AS?
31
00:01:21,652 --> 00:01:25,462
YOU KNOW WHAT?
HE EXHALES CARBON DIOXIDE,
WHICH IS NEEDED BY PLANTS.
32
00:01:26,657 --> 00:01:28,857
ALL RIGHT, WELL,
WE'VE GOT BIGGER PROBLEMS.
33
00:01:28,859 --> 00:01:30,859
MOM'S COOKING
THANKSGIVING DINNER.
34
00:01:30,861 --> 00:01:34,471
OH, NO NO NO NO NO.
35
00:01:34,465 --> 00:01:36,725
THE BEST CHEF
IN THE HOUSE--
36
00:01:36,727 --> 00:01:39,597
P.J. IS COOKING
THANKSGIVING DINNER.
37
00:01:39,600 --> 00:01:41,300
I AM?
SHE'S NEVER GONNA LET ME.
38
00:01:41,302 --> 00:01:43,172
THAT'S WHY YOU
HAVE TO TRICK HER.
39
00:01:43,174 --> 00:01:45,814
GIVE HER THE ILLUSION
THAT SHE'S COOKING,
WHEN IN REALITY,
40
00:01:45,806 --> 00:01:47,806
YOU'RE THE ONE DOING
ALL THE WORK.
41
00:01:47,808 --> 00:01:50,808
GOT IT, GOT IT.
JUST ONE QUESTION.
42
00:01:50,811 --> 00:01:53,741
WHAT DOES ILLUSION MEAN?
43
00:01:53,744 --> 00:01:55,724
THREE WORDS--
44
00:01:55,716 --> 00:01:58,246
COOK THANKSGIVING DINNER.
45
00:01:58,249 --> 00:02:00,319
RIGHT NOW?
46
00:02:02,253 --> 00:02:05,233
RELAX, DAD.
JUST MESSING WITH YOU.
47
00:02:05,226 --> 00:02:07,526
OH, BY THE WAY,
THANKSGIVING-- TWO WORDS.
48
00:02:10,301 --> 00:02:13,331
( rock music playing )
49
00:02:13,334 --> 00:02:14,814
♪ TODAY'S ALL BURNT TOAST ♪
50
00:02:14,805 --> 00:02:16,605
♪ RUNNING LATE
AND DAD JOKES ♪
51
00:02:16,607 --> 00:02:19,567
♪ "HAS ANYBODY
SEEN MY LEFT SHOE?" ♪
52
00:02:19,570 --> 00:02:21,440
♪ I CLOSE MY EYES,
TAKE A BITE ♪
53
00:02:21,442 --> 00:02:22,772
♪ GRAB A RIDE,
LAUGH OUT LOUD ♪
54
00:02:22,773 --> 00:02:24,783
♪ THERE IT IS
UP ON THE ROOF ♪
55
00:02:26,447 --> 00:02:29,547
♪ I'VE BEEN THERE,
I SURVIVED ♪
56
00:02:29,550 --> 00:02:32,750
♪ SO JUST TAKE
MY ADVICE ♪
57
00:02:32,753 --> 00:02:36,233
♪ HANG IN THERE, BABY,
THINGS ARE CRAZY ♪
58
00:02:36,227 --> 00:02:39,227
♪ BUT I KNOW
YOUR FUTURE'S BRIGHT ♪
59
00:02:39,230 --> 00:02:40,790
♪ HANG IN THERE, BABY ♪
60
00:02:40,791 --> 00:02:42,591
♪ THERE'S NO MAYBE ♪
61
00:02:42,593 --> 00:02:45,573
♪ EVERYTHING
TURNS OUT ALL RIGHT ♪
62
00:02:45,566 --> 00:02:47,796
♪ SURE LIFE
IS UP AND DOWN ♪
63
00:02:47,798 --> 00:02:51,668
♪ BUT TRUST ME,
IT COMES BACK AROUND ♪
64
00:02:51,672 --> 00:02:55,612
♪ YOU'RE GONNA LOVE
WHO YOU TURN OUT TO BE ♪
65
00:02:56,607 --> 00:02:59,547
♪ HANG IN THERE, BABY. ♪
66
00:03:10,321 --> 00:03:11,821
WHAT YOU DRAWING THERE,
CHARLIE?
67
00:03:11,822 --> 00:03:13,692
A TURKEY.
68
00:03:13,694 --> 00:03:15,704
- ARE YOU SURE?
- YEAH.
69
00:03:15,696 --> 00:03:18,926
IT LOOKS A BIT MORE
LIKE MASHED POTATOES.
70
00:03:18,929 --> 00:03:22,499
LOOK, BIG THANKSGIVING SALE
AT THE GIZMO HUT.
71
00:03:22,503 --> 00:03:25,713
THEY'RE SELLING MYTABS
FOR $49? THAT'S AWESOME!
72
00:03:25,706 --> 00:03:28,206
I KNOW! BUT WE HAVE
TO GET IN LINE EARLY
73
00:03:28,208 --> 00:03:30,478
BECAUSE THEY'LL ONLY HAVE
10 OF THESE AT THAT PRICE.
74
00:03:30,481 --> 00:03:33,311
SO WE HAVE TO WAIT IN LINE
ON THANKSGIVING DAY?
75
00:03:33,314 --> 00:03:35,724
YES, THE SALE STARTS
AT MIDNIGHT.
76
00:03:35,716 --> 00:03:37,716
WHY DID THEY HAVE
TO MAKE IT SO HARD?
77
00:03:37,718 --> 00:03:39,218
ALL WE WANNA DO
IS CELEBRATE
78
00:03:39,219 --> 00:03:41,519
THE TRUE MEANING
OF THANKSGIVING--
79
00:03:41,522 --> 00:03:43,852
BUYING ELECTRONICS
AT TERRIFIC PRICES.
80
00:03:43,854 --> 00:03:46,264
I'M SAYING.
81
00:03:46,257 --> 00:03:48,397
TURKEY.
82
00:03:55,866 --> 00:03:57,936
( doorbell rings )
83
00:04:01,011 --> 00:04:03,011
( both sigh )
84
00:04:04,845 --> 00:04:08,015
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS ANSWER
THE DOOR WHEN I COME OVER?
85
00:04:08,018 --> 00:04:11,248
HOW ABOUT YOU STOP
COMING OVER AND I'LL
STOP ANSWERING THE DOOR?
86
00:04:13,854 --> 00:04:15,494
HI, MRS. DABNEY.
87
00:04:15,486 --> 00:04:17,556
AMY, I HAVE
A QUESTION FOR YOU.
88
00:04:17,558 --> 00:04:20,488
DO YOU KNOW WHERE I CAN
GET A SMALL TURKEY FOR ONE?
89
00:04:20,491 --> 00:04:22,491
IT'S JUST ME THIS YEAR.
90
00:04:22,493 --> 00:04:23,933
OH, WELL,
WHERE'S MR. DABNEY?
91
00:04:23,934 --> 00:04:27,344
DIDN'T YOU HEAR?
I DIVORCED HIS
SORRY BUTT.
92
00:04:27,338 --> 00:04:30,368
( gasps )
OH, I'M SO SORRY
TO HEAR THAT.
93
00:04:30,371 --> 00:04:33,601
I'M NOT.
WE WERE JUST MAKING
EACH OTHER MISERABLE.
94
00:04:33,604 --> 00:04:37,454
NOW I CAN BE
THE HAPPY-GO-LUCKY
PERSON I ALWAYS WAS.
95
00:04:37,448 --> 00:04:39,408
YOU ARE?
96
00:04:39,410 --> 00:04:41,950
I MEAN--
I MEAN, YOU CAN.
97
00:04:41,952 --> 00:04:43,612
YOU ARE?
98
00:04:45,055 --> 00:04:48,485
SO ANYWAY,
I'LL BE EATING
99
00:04:48,489 --> 00:04:52,059
THAT TINY TURKEY
IN THAT BIG EMPTY HOUSE,
100
00:04:52,062 --> 00:04:55,372
ALL ALONE, BY MYSELF,
101
00:04:55,366 --> 00:04:58,396
JUST ME.
102
00:04:58,399 --> 00:05:00,529
WELL, IT'LL BE
GOOD PRACTICE
FOR CHRISTMAS.
103
00:05:02,302 --> 00:05:04,002
AFTER YOU.
104
00:05:04,004 --> 00:05:08,084
MRS. DABNEY,
WOULD YOU LIKE TO--
105
00:05:11,311 --> 00:05:13,781
MRS. DABNEY, WOULD
YOU LIKE TO JOIN US
106
00:05:13,784 --> 00:05:15,394
FOR THANKSGIVING DINNER?
107
00:05:15,386 --> 00:05:18,886
WELL, THIS IS COMING OUT
OF NOWHERE.
108
00:05:20,090 --> 00:05:22,090
I'LL HAVE TO CHECK
MY SCHEDULE.
109
00:05:22,092 --> 00:05:24,832
BYE NOW.
110
00:05:29,630 --> 00:05:31,000
WHY DID YOU DO THAT?
111
00:05:31,001 --> 00:05:33,601
I WAS BEING GRACIOUS
112
00:05:33,604 --> 00:05:35,374
AND I WAS BEING
NEIGHBORLY.
113
00:05:35,366 --> 00:05:38,436
ALL RIGHT, WELL,
THAT BETTER END
BY CHRISTMAS.
114
00:05:45,416 --> 00:05:47,746
HEY, MOM,
WHAT YOU GOT THERE?
115
00:05:47,748 --> 00:05:49,078
IT'S THE MENU
FOR THANKSGIVING.
116
00:05:49,079 --> 00:05:50,779
TALK ABOUT GREAT TIMING
117
00:05:50,781 --> 00:05:52,781
BECAUSE I WAS GONNA VOLUNTEER
TO HELP YOU COOK.
118
00:05:52,783 --> 00:05:55,133
P.J., THAT IS SO SWEET,
BUT ACTUALLY I WAS
GONNA ASK TEDDY.
119
00:05:55,125 --> 00:05:57,555
MOM, TEDDY DOES NOT
HAVE TIME.
120
00:05:57,558 --> 00:05:59,688
SHE IS OFF IN HER
OWN LITTLE WORLD
121
00:05:59,690 --> 00:06:02,030
WITH THE DOLLS
AND THE HORSES
122
00:06:02,032 --> 00:06:03,962
AND THE DRESS-UP.
123
00:06:05,035 --> 00:06:07,995
YOU DO KNOW
SHE'S NOT SEVEN, RIGHT?
124
00:06:09,840 --> 00:06:11,370
WHATEVER.
LET ME SEE THE LIST.
125
00:06:11,371 --> 00:06:14,141
OKAY, I'M JUST GONNA
PUT A LITTLE CHECK
126
00:06:14,144 --> 00:06:15,954
NEXT TO THE THINGS
I LIKE TO COOK.
127
00:06:15,946 --> 00:06:19,406
YEAH, YES.
OOH, DEFINITELY.
128
00:06:19,410 --> 00:06:22,110
OH OH OH OH, YEAH.
129
00:06:22,112 --> 00:06:24,562
HONEY, YOU CHECKED
EVERYTHING BUT THE ROLLS.
130
00:06:24,555 --> 00:06:28,015
OH, RIGHT, SORRY.
"ROLLS."
131
00:06:28,018 --> 00:06:30,088
OKAY, FINE, YOU CAN COOK
ALL THAT OTHER STUFF,
132
00:06:30,090 --> 00:06:32,060
BUT I AM DEFINITELY
COOKING THE TURKEY.
133
00:06:32,062 --> 00:06:34,062
WAIT, THAT WASN'T
ON THE LIST.
134
00:06:34,064 --> 00:06:35,904
WELL, I THOUGHT
IT WAS OBVIOUS.
135
00:06:38,068 --> 00:06:41,428
I GOT BOGGED DOWN
ON THE SIDE DISHES,
LOST MY FOCUS.
136
00:06:44,104 --> 00:06:46,984
SO HOW DID IT GO?
137
00:06:48,739 --> 00:06:50,739
I'VE GOT SOME BAD NEWS.
138
00:06:50,741 --> 00:06:52,411
WHAT?
139
00:06:52,412 --> 00:06:54,452
SHE'S MAKING ONE DISH.
140
00:06:54,445 --> 00:06:57,585
PLEASE SAY BROCCOLI.
PLEASE SAY BROCCOLI.
141
00:06:58,919 --> 00:07:02,419
IT RHYMES WITH SCHMURKEY.
142
00:07:02,422 --> 00:07:03,952
IT'S TURKEY.
143
00:07:08,699 --> 00:07:12,159
- HEY, EVERYBODY,
GRANDPA'S HERE.
- Kids: HEY!
144
00:07:12,162 --> 00:07:15,872
YEAH YEAH,
MY, HOW YOU'VE GROWN.
BLAH BLAH BLAH.
145
00:07:17,968 --> 00:07:21,438
I DON'T BELIEVE
YOU'VE MET CHARLIE.
146
00:07:21,441 --> 00:07:24,681
NOW WHY IS HE DRESSED
LIKE A GIRL?
147
00:07:24,675 --> 00:07:27,015
WELL, BECAUSE SHE IS A GIRL.
148
00:07:27,017 --> 00:07:28,847
YES, CHARLIE IS SHORT
FOR CHARLOTTE.
149
00:07:28,849 --> 00:07:31,149
THEN WHY ISN'T
SHE CALLEDSHARLIE?
150
00:07:34,485 --> 00:07:36,485
SERIOUSLY,
I DON'T GET IT.
151
00:07:36,487 --> 00:07:39,187
YOU GIVE
THE GIRLS BOYS' NAMES.
HE SHOULD BE TEDDY,
152
00:07:39,189 --> 00:07:41,859
HE SHOULD BE CHARLIE,
AND SHE SHOULD BE P.J.
153
00:07:41,862 --> 00:07:43,932
WE'RE NOT RENAMING
THE KIDS, DAD.
154
00:07:45,536 --> 00:07:48,536
GOOD NEWS.
I CHECKED MY SCHEDULE,
155
00:07:48,539 --> 00:07:51,099
AND IT TURNS OUT I AM
AVAILABLE ON THANKSGIVING.
156
00:07:51,101 --> 00:07:54,001
ALL RIGHT, REALLY?
WHO LEFT THE DOOR OPEN?
157
00:07:54,004 --> 00:07:56,654
MRS. DABNEY,
THIS IS MY FATHER-IN-LAW
FRANK DUNCAN.
158
00:07:56,647 --> 00:07:58,147
FRANK, ESTELLE DABNEY.
159
00:07:58,148 --> 00:08:01,908
BOB, I WAS WONDERING
IF YOU COULD COME OVER
160
00:08:01,912 --> 00:08:03,482
AND LOOK
AT MY GARBAGE DISPOSAL.
161
00:08:03,483 --> 00:08:05,663
- IT'S NOT WORKING RIGHT.
- OH, I'LL DO IT.
162
00:08:05,656 --> 00:08:08,486
HAD MY OWN PLUMBING BUSINESS
FOR 30 YEARS.
163
00:08:08,488 --> 00:08:11,018
PLUMBING, NOW THAT'S
A MAN'S JOB.
164
00:08:11,021 --> 00:08:13,491
YOU WANT SOMEONE
TO CATCH A BUTTERFLY,
165
00:08:13,493 --> 00:08:15,603
CALL MY SON.
166
00:08:15,596 --> 00:08:17,596
LET'S GO.
167
00:08:24,504 --> 00:08:26,184
YES, WE'RE NUMBERS
NINE AND 10!
168
00:08:26,176 --> 00:08:28,076
HA!
169
00:08:28,078 --> 00:08:30,108
- YOU'RE NINE AND I'M 10?
- YEAH.
170
00:08:30,110 --> 00:08:31,680
WHY DON'T I GET
TO BE NINE?
171
00:08:31,682 --> 00:08:34,512
WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE?
WE'RE BOTH GETTING MYTABS.
172
00:08:34,514 --> 00:08:36,254
THEN I'M NINE.
173
00:08:37,818 --> 00:08:40,918
OH, GREAT, I GOTTA SPEND
THE REST OF THE DAY IN LINE
174
00:08:40,921 --> 00:08:42,991
BEHIND YOU TWO LOSERS.
175
00:08:42,993 --> 00:08:44,703
WELL WELL WELL,
176
00:08:44,695 --> 00:08:47,525
IF IT ISN'T KARL,
THE NEIGHBORHOOD JERK.
177
00:08:48,559 --> 00:08:50,659
IF YOU WERE PLANNING
ON GETTING A MYTAB,
178
00:08:50,661 --> 00:08:53,061
YOU'RE OUT OF LUCK.
YOU'RE NUMBER 11.
179
00:08:53,063 --> 00:08:54,943
NOT IF I OUTRUN YOU.
180
00:08:54,935 --> 00:08:58,305
AND WHEN I GET MY MYTAB,
I'M GONNA GO ONLINE
TO THE LOSERS SITE
181
00:08:58,308 --> 00:09:00,568
AND POST SOMETHING
ON YOUR LOSER PAGE
182
00:09:00,571 --> 00:09:02,641
THAT SAYS,
"HEY, LOSER!"
183
00:09:04,214 --> 00:09:06,654
THIS IS GONNA BE
A LONG DAY.
184
00:09:06,647 --> 00:09:09,747
EXCUSE ME, KARL.
I'M GONNA ZIP UP
THE INVISIBLE WALL NOW
185
00:09:09,750 --> 00:09:11,280
SO WE DON'T HAVE
TO LISTEN TO YOU.
186
00:09:11,281 --> 00:09:13,551
( imitates zipper )
187
00:09:13,553 --> 00:09:15,633
YOU CAN STILL HEAR ME.
188
00:09:17,127 --> 00:09:19,587
I KNOW YOU CAN.
189
00:09:19,590 --> 00:09:21,930
HEY, INVISIBLE WALLS--
STUPID.
190
00:09:21,932 --> 00:09:24,742
( imitates zipper )
I'M SORRY, WHAT?
191
00:09:26,897 --> 00:09:29,567
T, YOU SHOULD GET GOING
SO YOU CAN MAKE IT HOME
FOR YOUR THANKSGIVING DINNER.
192
00:09:29,569 --> 00:09:32,199
YEAH, YOU'RE RIGHT.
WELL, I'LL BE BACK AT 4:00
SO YOU CAN GO TO YOUR DINNER.
193
00:09:32,202 --> 00:09:35,612
- SEE YA.
- SEE YA.
194
00:09:35,606 --> 00:09:37,246
HEY, IVY,
195
00:09:37,247 --> 00:09:39,277
NOW THAT TEDDY'S GONE,
196
00:09:39,279 --> 00:09:42,649
I CAN FINALLY ADMIT THAT
I'M NOT REALLY A JERK.
197
00:09:42,653 --> 00:09:46,223
I'M JUST A VULNERABLE KID
WHO'S TOO SCARED TO ADMIT
198
00:09:46,216 --> 00:09:49,156
THAT HE NEEDS A FRIEND.
199
00:09:49,159 --> 00:09:50,619
OH, REALLY?
200
00:09:50,621 --> 00:09:54,121
NO, I'M A JERK.
LOSER!
201
00:09:54,124 --> 00:09:57,104
( laughs )
202
00:09:57,097 --> 00:10:00,327
YEP, A REAL LONG DAY.
203
00:10:08,378 --> 00:10:10,308
OH, MAN,
THIS IS JUST WEIRD.
204
00:10:10,310 --> 00:10:12,340
( Charlie giggles )
205
00:10:12,342 --> 00:10:14,342
- WHAT IS?
- GRANDPA.
206
00:10:14,344 --> 00:10:15,894
HE SEEMS HAPPY.
207
00:10:15,886 --> 00:10:18,386
IT'S VERY UNSETTLING.
208
00:10:18,388 --> 00:10:20,688
PEEK-A-BOO, I SEE YOU.
209
00:10:20,691 --> 00:10:22,891
PEEK-A-BOO.
210
00:10:24,695 --> 00:10:27,655
ALL RIGHT, YOU KNOW WHAT?
WE'D BETTER GO MAKE SURE
HE'S OKAY.
211
00:10:27,658 --> 00:10:31,128
HERE WE GO.
I'M GONNA GET YA!
212
00:10:31,131 --> 00:10:32,661
HERE WE GO.
I'M GONNA GET YA!
213
00:10:32,663 --> 00:10:35,373
- HERE HE COMES. WHOOO!
- ( giggling )
214
00:10:35,365 --> 00:10:37,935
OH, SHE'S A CUTIE PIE!
215
00:10:37,938 --> 00:10:41,068
AND YOU WERE CUTE, TOO,
WHEN YOU WERE AT THAT AGE,
GABE. BOOP.
216
00:10:41,071 --> 00:10:42,741
( laughs )
217
00:10:42,743 --> 00:10:44,343
( knocks on door )
218
00:10:44,344 --> 00:10:47,124
HAPPY THANKSGIVING,
EVERYONE!
219
00:10:47,117 --> 00:10:50,847
HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
220
00:10:52,352 --> 00:10:54,322
SHE'S ACTING WEIRD, TOO?
221
00:10:54,324 --> 00:10:56,264
OKAY, SOMETHING'S NOT RIGHT.
222
00:10:56,256 --> 00:10:58,356
THIS IS SUCH
A WONDERFUL DAY.
223
00:10:58,358 --> 00:11:01,188
I HAVE SO MUCH
TO BE THANKFUL FOR.
224
00:11:01,191 --> 00:11:02,391
PFFT. LIKE WHAT?
225
00:11:02,392 --> 00:11:04,392
WELL, I AM THANKFUL
226
00:11:04,394 --> 00:11:06,844
THAT I HAVE A NEW MAN
IN MY LIFE.
227
00:11:06,837 --> 00:11:09,837
AND I AM THANKFUL
TO BE THAT MAN.
228
00:11:18,678 --> 00:11:20,278
( laughing )
229
00:11:20,280 --> 00:11:24,280
UM... SO YOU TWO
ARE TOGETHER NOW?
230
00:11:24,284 --> 00:11:25,994
THAT'S RIGHT.
231
00:11:25,986 --> 00:11:28,286
AFTER FRANK UNCLOGGED
MY DISPOSAL...
232
00:11:31,261 --> 00:11:34,421
HE UNCLOGGED MY HEART.
233
00:11:34,424 --> 00:11:37,134
SO IT LOOKS LIKE
I'LL BE STICKING AROUND
234
00:11:37,127 --> 00:11:39,127
FOR A WHILE.
235
00:11:40,971 --> 00:11:43,801
AND WHO KNOWS, GABE?
SOMEDAY SOON,
236
00:11:43,804 --> 00:11:46,714
YOU MIGHT BE
CALLING ME GRANDMA.
237
00:11:48,008 --> 00:11:51,208
GABE, LET'S GO
FOR A CATCH.
238
00:11:51,211 --> 00:11:53,341
- A WHAT?
- JUST GO OUTSIDE.
239
00:12:01,221 --> 00:12:04,091
ALL RIGHT,
WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO?
240
00:12:04,094 --> 00:12:06,504
THERE'S ONLY ONE
THING WE CAN DO.
WE GOTTA SPLIT 'EM UP.
241
00:12:06,496 --> 00:12:10,026
OH, THAT SOUNDS EVIL.
242
00:12:10,030 --> 00:12:12,060
I LIKE IT.
243
00:12:12,062 --> 00:12:15,142
HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT?
244
00:12:15,135 --> 00:12:17,935
ALL WE HAVE TO DO
IS JUST HELP THEM TO GET
TO KNOW EACH OTHER.
245
00:12:17,938 --> 00:12:19,238
I MEAN,
ONCE WE DO THAT...
246
00:12:19,239 --> 00:12:20,909
THEN THEY'LL HATE
EACH OTHER.
247
00:12:20,911 --> 00:12:23,011
- EXACTLY.
- YEAH!
248
00:12:23,013 --> 00:12:26,053
WAIT WAIT WAIT.
SHOULD WE DO THIS?
249
00:12:26,046 --> 00:12:29,416
THEY ARE OLDER PEOPLE.
THIS MAY BE THEIR LAST
CHANCE AT HAPPINESS.
250
00:12:29,419 --> 00:12:33,049
YOU MEAN YOUR NEW MOM'S
LAST CHANCE AT HAPPINESS?
251
00:12:34,124 --> 00:12:36,134
YEAH, THEY'RE GOING DOWN.
252
00:13:36,086 --> 00:13:38,086
( gasps )
253
00:13:39,219 --> 00:13:44,089
- WHAT HAPPENED?
- HONEY, I SHRUNK THE TURKEY.
254
00:13:44,094 --> 00:13:47,404
OH NO, YOU MUST HAVE
FLASH ROASTED IT.
255
00:13:47,397 --> 00:13:50,127
FLASH ROASTED?
WHAT'S THAT?
256
00:13:50,130 --> 00:13:52,130
WELL, IT'S COMPLICATED.
257
00:13:52,132 --> 00:13:54,102
IT'S WHAT HAPPENS
WHEN YOU SIMULTANEOUSLY
258
00:13:54,104 --> 00:13:56,144
OVER-BROAST
AND UNDER-ROAST.
259
00:13:56,136 --> 00:13:58,106
PUT SIMPLY,
IT SHRINKS EVERYTHING.
260
00:13:58,108 --> 00:14:01,238
- EVEN THE BONES?
- ESPECIALLY THE BONES.
261
00:14:01,241 --> 00:14:03,571
P.J.,
WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO?
262
00:14:03,573 --> 00:14:05,853
WELL, I'M JUST THINKING
ON MY FEET HERE,
263
00:14:05,845 --> 00:14:08,145
- BUT WE DO HAVE
A DEEP FRYER.
- YEAH, SO?
264
00:14:08,148 --> 00:14:11,348
SO IF WE DEEP FRY
A TURKEY, DINNER COULD
BE READY IN 90 MINUTES.
265
00:14:11,351 --> 00:14:13,981
WHERE ARE WE GONNA GET
ANOTHER BIRD ON THANKSGIVING?
266
00:14:13,984 --> 00:14:15,894
I HAVE A SPARE TURKEY
IN THE GARAGE.
267
00:14:15,886 --> 00:14:18,056
WHY DO YOU HAVE
A SPARE TURKEY
IN THE GARAGE?
268
00:14:18,058 --> 00:14:22,058
WHY DON'T YOU HAVE
A SPARE TURKEY
IN THE GARAGE?
269
00:14:23,433 --> 00:14:26,303
- GO GET IT.
- OKAY.
270
00:14:26,296 --> 00:14:28,336
HEY, MOM,
ARE WE GONNA EAT SOON?
271
00:14:28,338 --> 00:14:30,068
'CAUSE EVERYONE'S
REALLY HUNGRY
272
00:14:30,070 --> 00:14:32,340
AND WOULD LOVE
TO BE DONE BY 4:00.
273
00:14:32,342 --> 00:14:35,112
ACTUALLY, DINNER
HAS BEEN DELAYED.
274
00:14:36,176 --> 00:14:38,246
P.J. FLASH ROASTED
THE TURKEY
275
00:14:38,248 --> 00:14:40,278
AND NOW WE HAVE
TO START ALL OVER.
276
00:14:45,115 --> 00:14:46,955
IVY, HI, IT'S ME.
277
00:14:46,957 --> 00:14:48,287
LISTEN, MY MOM
RUINED THE TURKEY
278
00:14:48,288 --> 00:14:49,988
AND BLAMED IT
ON MY BROTHER,
279
00:14:49,990 --> 00:14:52,360
SO I'M GONNA BE LATE.
280
00:14:52,362 --> 00:14:54,192
YEAH, NO, OKAY.
DON'T WORRY, THOUGH.
281
00:14:54,194 --> 00:14:56,904
I'LL THINK OF SOMETHING.
JUST-- YOU STAY IN LINE.
282
00:14:56,896 --> 00:14:59,526
I'LL BE THERE
AS SOON AS I CAN.
OKAY.
283
00:14:59,529 --> 00:15:02,199
MOM, OH-- MOM,
284
00:15:02,202 --> 00:15:03,932
I HAVE A HEADACHE.
285
00:15:03,934 --> 00:15:08,014
WOW. SO MAYBE I SHOULD
REST IN MY ROOM FOR A BIT.
286
00:15:08,008 --> 00:15:10,978
SO IF YOU DON'T SEE ME
FOR, LIKE, TWO HOURS
OR SO JUST REMEMBER,
287
00:15:10,981 --> 00:15:12,511
I'M IN MY ROOM.
288
00:15:12,512 --> 00:15:15,252
WELL, HONEY,
YOU'RE PROBABLY HUNGRY.
289
00:15:15,245 --> 00:15:18,945
HERE, NIBBLE ON
THE FLASH TURKEY.
290
00:15:18,949 --> 00:15:21,349
YEAH,
I'LL BE IN MY ROOM.
291
00:15:24,624 --> 00:15:27,304
IF I BOIL YOU,
WILL YOU PLUMP BACK UP?
292
00:15:27,297 --> 00:15:29,197
WHO ARE YOU TALKING TO?
293
00:15:29,199 --> 00:15:31,199
THE MINI TURKEY.
294
00:15:38,308 --> 00:15:41,238
( laughing )
295
00:15:41,241 --> 00:15:44,271
ESTELLE, YOU MAKE ME
FEEL LIKE A NEW MAN.
296
00:15:44,274 --> 00:15:47,254
- WOOF!
- MEOW.
297
00:15:47,247 --> 00:15:49,677
HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT?
I GOT A REALLY FUN GAME
298
00:15:49,679 --> 00:15:52,549
CALLED LET'S NOT MAKE
ANIMAL SOUNDS.
299
00:15:54,324 --> 00:15:56,464
SO, MRS. DABNEY...
300
00:15:56,456 --> 00:15:59,286
OH, GABE, BABY,
WHY SO FORMAL?
301
00:15:59,289 --> 00:16:03,189
CALL ME NANA.
OR BETTER YET GAM-GAM.
302
00:16:04,234 --> 00:16:08,074
SO, HA HA HA,
GAM-GAM...
303
00:16:09,339 --> 00:16:11,139
IT'S INTERESTING
THAT YOU MEOWED,
304
00:16:11,141 --> 00:16:14,101
BECAUSE WE KNOW HOW MUCH
YOU LOVE YOUR CAT CABOODLE.
305
00:16:14,104 --> 00:16:17,184
AND DAD DOESN'T
LIKE CATS AT ALL.
ISN'T THAT RIGHT, DAD?
306
00:16:17,177 --> 00:16:20,977
- HATE 'EM.
- THEN CABOODLE'S GONE.
307
00:16:22,182 --> 00:16:25,292
BUT YOU LOVE THAT CAT
MORE THAN ANYTHING.
308
00:16:26,356 --> 00:16:29,116
- I THOUGHT I DID.
- OH.
309
00:16:30,460 --> 00:16:34,490
HEY, DID YOU KNOW
MY DAD SNORES SO LOUD,
310
00:16:34,494 --> 00:16:37,004
HE RATTLES
THE WHOLE HOUSE?
311
00:16:36,996 --> 00:16:40,466
GOOD, MR. DABNEY WAS ONE
OF THOSE SILENT SLEEPERS.
312
00:16:40,470 --> 00:16:42,300
AT LEAST WITH A SNORER,
313
00:16:42,302 --> 00:16:46,012
YOU KNOW THERE'S A MAN
IN THE HOUSE.
314
00:16:46,005 --> 00:16:49,035
AND I HOPE HE'S THERE
FOR A LONG TIME.
315
00:16:49,039 --> 00:16:50,739
ME TOO.
316
00:16:50,740 --> 00:16:53,580
- WOOF.
- MEOW.
317
00:17:00,290 --> 00:17:02,390
( sizzling )
318
00:17:02,392 --> 00:17:06,402
HEY, HOW WE DOING OUT HERE?
EVERYONE'S REALLY HUNGRY.
319
00:17:06,396 --> 00:17:09,126
DINNER SHOULD BE READY
IN 90 MINUTES.
320
00:17:09,129 --> 00:17:11,059
YOU THINK YOU COULD
SPEED IT UP?
321
00:17:11,061 --> 00:17:14,261
GRANDPA FRANK KEEPS
TRACING FINGER HEARTS
ON MRS. DABNEY'S BACK.
322
00:17:14,264 --> 00:17:16,544
I GUESS I COULD WHIP UP
SOME LITTLE SANDWICHES.
323
00:17:16,536 --> 00:17:18,606
- WATCH THE BIRD, OKAY?
- YEAH, SURE.
324
00:17:20,610 --> 00:17:24,240
I'M GONNA WATCH IT COOK
TWICE AS FAST.
325
00:17:26,216 --> 00:17:28,216
( boiling )
326
00:17:34,454 --> 00:17:38,394
CHARLIE, ARE YOU GONNA
EAT YOUR SANDWICH?
327
00:17:38,388 --> 00:17:42,288
- YES.
- WELL, CAN I HAVE
JUST A BITE?
328
00:17:42,292 --> 00:17:44,062
NO, DADDY.
329
00:17:44,063 --> 00:17:46,243
I'LL BUY YOU A DOLL.
330
00:17:46,236 --> 00:17:48,166
OKAY, EVERYONE,
331
00:17:48,168 --> 00:17:50,268
DINNER WILL BE READY
IN 10 MINUTES.
332
00:17:50,270 --> 00:17:52,470
NO, IT WON'T.
THE TURKEY'S GOTTA
COOK FOR ANOTHER HOUR.
333
00:17:52,472 --> 00:17:54,772
THAT'S WHERE YOU'RE WRONG.
I TURNED UP THE HEAT.
334
00:17:54,774 --> 00:17:57,714
- YOU DID WHAT?
- TURNED UP THE HEAT,
CUT THE COOKING TIME IN HALF.
335
00:17:57,707 --> 00:18:00,307
YOU CAN'T DO THAT.
IF THE OIL GETS TOO HOT,
THEN THE TURKEY MIGHT--
336
00:18:00,310 --> 00:18:02,150
( explosion )
337
00:18:02,152 --> 00:18:04,612
EXPLODE.
338
00:18:06,716 --> 00:18:09,586
- ( gasping )
- OH, LOOK AT THAT TURKEY GO!
339
00:18:09,589 --> 00:18:11,359
OH NO,
IT'S COMING BACK DOWN.
340
00:18:11,361 --> 00:18:13,721
- WHOA WHOA WHOA!
- NO NO NO!
341
00:18:13,723 --> 00:18:16,303
OKAY, IVY,
I'M ON MY WAY.
342
00:18:16,296 --> 00:18:19,566
- YEAH, SEE YA.
-( object whistling )
343
00:18:19,569 --> 00:18:21,399
( screams )
344
00:18:28,338 --> 00:18:30,378
HOW YOU FEELING, SWEETIE?
345
00:18:30,380 --> 00:18:32,840
WHAT HAPPENED TO ME AGAIN?
346
00:18:32,842 --> 00:18:35,552
TURKEY FELL
OUT OF THE SKY ON YOU.
347
00:18:37,287 --> 00:18:40,347
BUT TURKEYS CAN'T FLY.
CAN THEY?
348
00:18:41,821 --> 00:18:45,231
NO, I GUESS IN CARTOONS
THEY CAN.
349
00:18:45,225 --> 00:18:48,425
( laughing )
OH, I LIKE CARTOONS.
350
00:18:51,461 --> 00:18:53,461
OKAY, EVERYBODY.
351
00:18:54,504 --> 00:18:57,414
FRESH FROM
THE VENDING MACHINE.
352
00:18:57,407 --> 00:19:00,337
- HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
- WELL, AT LEAST
THEY'RE TURKEY.
353
00:19:00,340 --> 00:19:03,210
OR "MAY CONTAIN TURKEY."
354
00:19:04,574 --> 00:19:06,524
HEY, HONEY, I'M SORRY
355
00:19:06,516 --> 00:19:09,346
YOU GOTTA EAT
TURKEY SANDWICHES
IN THE HOSPITAL AGAIN.
356
00:19:09,349 --> 00:19:11,479
I KNOW THIS ISN'T
THE THANKSGIVING YOU WANTED.
357
00:19:11,481 --> 00:19:13,781
WELL, IT'S NOT.
358
00:19:13,783 --> 00:19:16,333
BUT YOU KNOW WHAT?
WE'RE ALL TOGETHER.
359
00:19:16,326 --> 00:19:17,756
TEDDY'S OKAY.
360
00:19:17,757 --> 00:19:20,387
AND THAT IS WHAT
I'M THANKFUL FOR.
361
00:19:20,390 --> 00:19:22,290
YEAH.
HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT?
362
00:19:22,292 --> 00:19:25,502
I AM THANKFUL FOR
EVERYBODY IN THIS ROOM.
363
00:19:25,495 --> 00:19:29,195
- ME TOO.
- ME TOO.
364
00:19:29,199 --> 00:19:32,739
I'M THANKFUL THAT THE PATIENT
IN ROOM 212 ORDERED ICE CREAM.
365
00:19:40,550 --> 00:19:42,380
I WONDER HOW THE LOVEBIRDS
ARE DOING.
366
00:19:42,382 --> 00:19:44,382
Frank:
YOU CAN'T TALK
TO ME THAT WAY.
367
00:19:44,384 --> 00:19:46,564
Estelle:
I CAN TALK TO YOU
ANY WAY I WANT, DIMWIT.
368
00:19:46,556 --> 00:19:48,886
THAT SOUNDS PROMISING.
369
00:19:50,490 --> 00:19:52,460
HEY, WHAT'S GOING ON?
370
00:19:52,462 --> 00:19:54,562
HE'S AN IDIOT.
371
00:19:54,564 --> 00:19:57,634
SHE'S A BATTLEAXE.
372
00:19:58,768 --> 00:20:01,428
YEAH, WE KNEW THAT,
BUT WHAT HAPPENED?
373
00:20:01,431 --> 00:20:03,831
WE SPENT AN HOUR
ALONE TOGETHER.
374
00:20:03,833 --> 00:20:05,683
LONGEST HOUR OF MY LIFE.
375
00:20:05,675 --> 00:20:07,375
SO YOU TWO AREN'T
A COUPLE ANYMORE?
376
00:20:07,377 --> 00:20:09,507
NO, WE ARE NOT.
377
00:20:10,980 --> 00:20:13,680
AND TO THINK,
I WAS GONNA MOVE
TO ARIZONA WITH YOU.
378
00:20:13,683 --> 00:20:16,553
SAY WHAT NOW?
379
00:20:16,546 --> 00:20:19,916
WAIT WAIT.
THERE'S STILL TIME.
380
00:20:19,919 --> 00:20:23,589
YOU GUYS CAN WORK THIS OUT.
I MEAN, YOU'RE PERFECT
FOR EACH OTHER.
381
00:20:23,593 --> 00:20:26,003
- OH!
- WAIT WAIT, COME BACK!
382
00:20:25,995 --> 00:20:27,995
GAM-GAM!
383
00:20:32,502 --> 00:20:35,442
Well, Charlie, another
Duncan family Thanksgiving
384
00:20:35,435 --> 00:20:36,965
has come and gone.
385
00:20:36,966 --> 00:20:38,466
The good news
is Grandpa Duncan
386
00:20:38,468 --> 00:20:40,238
has also come and gone.
387
00:20:40,239 --> 00:20:42,639
Hey, Teddy, tell me
what you think about this.
388
00:20:42,642 --> 00:20:44,572
"Dear Mrs. Dabney,
389
00:20:44,574 --> 00:20:47,884
I'm sorry for our ugly words.
Please forgive me.
390
00:20:47,877 --> 00:20:50,717
Sell your house and move
to Phoenix immediately.
391
00:20:50,720 --> 00:20:54,580
Do not call first.
Just surprise me.
392
00:20:54,584 --> 00:20:58,264
Forever yours,
Grandpa."
393
00:20:58,257 --> 00:21:01,427
Teddy:
sign it "Frank."
394
00:21:01,431 --> 00:21:03,961
Oh, yeah, that's good.
I could use that.
395
00:21:03,963 --> 00:21:06,373
( keyboard clicking )
396
00:21:06,366 --> 00:21:09,266
Anyway, since we never got
a Thanksgiving dinner,
397
00:21:09,268 --> 00:21:11,738
P.J. is about to deep fry
another turkey.
398
00:21:11,741 --> 00:21:14,801
So just to be
on the safe side.
399
00:21:14,804 --> 00:21:17,684
Wish me good luck,
Charlie.
400
00:21:26,456 --> 00:21:28,456
OH!
401
00:21:28,458 --> 00:21:31,558
THAT WAS THE WORST
SHOPPING EXPERIENCE
402
00:21:31,561 --> 00:21:34,391
- OF MY LIFE.
- MINE TOO.
403
00:21:34,394 --> 00:21:36,574
I MEAN, I HEARD
THOSE SALES WERE BRUTAL,
404
00:21:36,566 --> 00:21:38,566
BUT I DIDN'T KNOW
THEY WERE THIS BAD.
405
00:21:38,568 --> 00:21:41,898
AND WE WERE SO CLOSE
TO GETTING THAT LAST MYTAB.
406
00:21:41,901 --> 00:21:44,431
THEN THAT MONSTER CAME IN
407
00:21:44,434 --> 00:21:47,014
AND STARTED THROWING US
AROUND LIKE RAGDOLLS.
408
00:21:47,006 --> 00:21:49,406
( panting )
409
00:21:49,409 --> 00:21:52,079
WHAT JUST HAPPENED
IN THERE?
410
00:21:52,081 --> 00:21:54,481
KARL, ARE YOU CRYING?
411
00:21:54,484 --> 00:21:57,894
SOMEBODY STEPPED
ON MY NECK.
412
00:21:57,887 --> 00:22:00,387
( groans )
413
00:22:00,390 --> 00:22:02,620
HEY, IS IT REALLY WORTH
TREATING PEOPLE LIKE THIS
414
00:22:02,622 --> 00:22:04,752
TO GET A STUPID MYTAB?
415
00:22:04,754 --> 00:22:06,434
YES.
30019
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