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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,405 --> 00:00:06,535 PREVIOUSLY ON "GOOD LUCK CHARLIE"... 2 00:00:06,537 --> 00:00:10,037 THE DUNCANS ARE GOING TO HAWAII! 3 00:00:10,041 --> 00:00:11,541 WHAT?! 4 00:00:11,542 --> 00:00:14,452 - I'M TEDDY. - ALOHA, TEDDY. I'M KAI. 5 00:00:14,445 --> 00:00:17,445 WE MISSED YOU YESTERDAY AT THE TIME SHARE PRESENTATION. 6 00:00:17,448 --> 00:00:19,188 IF YOU DON'T ATTEND THE ONE TODAY, 7 00:00:19,190 --> 00:00:21,490 WE'LL BE FORCED TO CHARGE YOU FOR YOUR ENTIRE TRIP. 8 00:00:21,492 --> 00:00:24,232 ( speaks Hawaiian ) 9 00:00:24,225 --> 00:00:25,425 WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 10 00:00:25,426 --> 00:00:27,296 PUTTING A CURSE ON YOU. 11 00:00:27,298 --> 00:00:29,658 SWIMMING AND JELLYFISH. 12 00:00:29,660 --> 00:00:31,430 THINGS KEEP HAPPENING. 13 00:00:33,164 --> 00:00:35,214 -( alarm blaring ) - ( screaming ) 14 00:00:36,667 --> 00:00:39,467 PLEASE, GOD, IF YOU LET ME LIVE THROUGH THIS, 15 00:00:39,470 --> 00:00:41,670 I PROMISE I'LL DO SOMETHING GOOD. 16 00:00:49,580 --> 00:00:53,580 CHARLIE? CHARLIE? 17 00:00:53,584 --> 00:00:56,164 CHARLIE? HERE, GIRL. 18 00:00:56,157 --> 00:00:59,127 COME OUT, COME OUT WHEREVER YOU ARE, 19 00:00:59,130 --> 00:01:01,260 BEFORE TEDDY STARTS TO CRY. 20 00:01:01,262 --> 00:01:03,292 - HEY, HONEY. - OH, DAD. 21 00:01:03,294 --> 00:01:06,174 - WHAT'S UP? - OH, NOTHING. 22 00:01:06,167 --> 00:01:08,237 JUST A QUICK PLANT INSPECTION. 23 00:01:08,239 --> 00:01:09,769 ( sniffs ) YEP, FICUS. 24 00:01:11,372 --> 00:01:13,802 TEDDY, YOU OKAY? 25 00:01:13,804 --> 00:01:16,384 I'M FINE. 26 00:01:16,377 --> 00:01:20,077 SO HAVE YOU SEEN ANYONE AROUND THE HOTEL FROM THE FAMILY, 27 00:01:20,080 --> 00:01:23,150 YOU KNOW, KID-WISE? YOU'VE ALREADY SEEN ME, 28 00:01:23,154 --> 00:01:26,564 SO I GUESS IT'D HAVE TO BE ONE OF THE OTHERS LIKE P.J. 29 00:01:26,557 --> 00:01:30,287 OR GABE OR CHARLIE. 30 00:01:30,291 --> 00:01:32,291 DID YOU HIT YOUR HEAD AGAIN? 31 00:01:32,293 --> 00:01:35,473 DID YOU HIT YOURS? 32 00:01:35,466 --> 00:01:37,626 WHAT'S WITH ALL THE QUESTIONS? 33 00:01:45,306 --> 00:01:47,576 HOLD ON, HOLD ON. HERE YOU GO, SWEETIE. 34 00:01:47,578 --> 00:01:50,308 - YOU NEED TO WEAR ONE OF THESE. - WHY? 35 00:01:50,311 --> 00:01:52,181 BECAUSE WE DON'T WANT YOU TO GET LOST. 36 00:01:52,183 --> 00:01:56,493 LET'S GO. OKAY, COME ON, LET'S GO THIS WAY. 37 00:01:56,487 --> 00:01:58,117 ( rock music playing ) 38 00:01:58,118 --> 00:01:59,588 ♪ TODAY'S ALL BURNT TOAST ♪ 39 00:01:59,590 --> 00:02:01,390 ♪ RUNNING LATE, AND DAD JOKES ♪ 40 00:02:01,392 --> 00:02:03,822 ♪ "HAS ANYBODY SEEN MY LEFT SHOE?" ♪ 41 00:02:03,824 --> 00:02:05,804 ♪ I CLOSE MY EYES, TAKE A BITE ♪ 42 00:02:05,796 --> 00:02:07,696 ♪ GRAB A RIDE, LAUGH OUT LOUD ♪ 43 00:02:07,698 --> 00:02:10,428 ♪ THERE IT IS UP ON THE ROOF ♪ 44 00:02:10,431 --> 00:02:13,661 ♪ I'VE BEEN THERE, I'VE SURVIVED ♪ 45 00:02:13,664 --> 00:02:17,444 ♪ SO JUST TAKE MY ADVICE ♪ 46 00:02:17,438 --> 00:02:19,568 ♪ HANG IN THERE, BABY ♪ 47 00:02:19,570 --> 00:02:21,210 ♪ THINGS ARE CRAZY ♪ 48 00:02:21,212 --> 00:02:23,742 ♪ BUT I KNOW YOUR FUTURE'S BRIGHT ♪ 49 00:02:23,744 --> 00:02:25,654 ♪ HANG IN THERE, BABY ♪ 50 00:02:25,646 --> 00:02:27,576 ♪ THERE'S NO MAYBE ♪ 51 00:02:27,578 --> 00:02:30,348 ♪ EVERYTHING TURNS OUT ALL RIGHT ♪ 52 00:02:30,351 --> 00:02:32,651 ♪ YOUR LIFE IS UP AND DOWN ♪ 53 00:02:32,653 --> 00:02:36,393 ♪ BUT TRUST ME, IT COMES BACK AROUND ♪ 54 00:02:36,387 --> 00:02:39,657 ♪ YOU'RE GONNA LOVE WHO YOU TURN OUT TO BE ♪ 55 00:02:41,262 --> 00:02:43,662 ♪ HANG IN THERE, BABY. ♪ 56 00:02:54,205 --> 00:02:56,845 COME ON, P.J. I NEED YOUR LIST OF FEARS. 57 00:02:56,847 --> 00:02:58,647 DON'T RUSH ME. THAT REMINDS ME, 58 00:02:58,649 --> 00:03:02,409 NUMBER 27, "BEING-- HOW DO YOU SPELL "RUSHED"? 59 00:03:02,413 --> 00:03:05,463 ( sighs ) GIMME THAT. 60 00:03:05,456 --> 00:03:09,486 "THINGS P.J.'s AFRAID OF-- CLOWNS, HEIGHTS, FALLING, 61 00:03:09,490 --> 00:03:11,920 SPIDERS, UNICORNS, 62 00:03:11,922 --> 00:03:15,202 TROLLS, OGRES." 63 00:03:15,195 --> 00:03:17,895 OKAY, HOW ABOUT WE START ACTUALLY EXIST?T 64 00:03:17,898 --> 00:03:19,368 GOOD IDEA. 65 00:03:19,370 --> 00:03:22,370 WHERE YOU GONNA FIND AN OGRE IN HAWAII? 66 00:03:24,705 --> 00:03:28,235 OKAY, ITEM NUMBER ONE. 67 00:03:28,239 --> 00:03:30,879 -YOU READY? - YEAH, I THINK SO. 68 00:03:30,881 --> 00:03:33,481 ( honking ) 69 00:03:36,387 --> 00:03:40,247 HIYA, P.J. HOW YOU DOING? 70 00:03:40,251 --> 00:03:43,251 FINE. 71 00:03:45,756 --> 00:03:47,756 DON'T BE AFRAID. 72 00:03:47,758 --> 00:03:49,758 ALLOW ME TO INTRODUCE MYSELF. 73 00:03:49,760 --> 00:03:53,530 - I'M NOT SCARY THE CLOWN. - ( whimpers ) 74 00:03:55,235 --> 00:03:58,305 YOU LOOK A LITTLE SWEATY. 75 00:03:58,309 --> 00:03:59,969 TRY MY HANDKERCHIEF. 76 00:04:01,572 --> 00:04:04,282 YEAH. 77 00:04:05,316 --> 00:04:07,946 MAKE IT STOP. MAKE IT STOP! 78 00:04:07,948 --> 00:04:10,448 ( screaming ) 79 00:04:10,451 --> 00:04:13,981 THIS IS GONNA TAKE A WHILE. 80 00:04:19,660 --> 00:04:22,260 THANK YOU ANYWAY. 81 00:04:24,965 --> 00:04:27,735 WHOA, HONEY! WHAT HAPPENED? 82 00:04:27,738 --> 00:04:29,938 REMEMBER THAT CURSE I WAS TELLING YOU ABOUT? 83 00:04:29,940 --> 00:04:32,040 - THAT'S WHAT HAPPENED. - WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? 84 00:04:32,042 --> 00:04:34,912 COME HERE. I'LL TELL YOU WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT. 85 00:04:34,905 --> 00:04:37,305 OKAY, I WAS ON THE PUTTING GREEN WITH CHARLIE 86 00:04:37,308 --> 00:04:40,548 WHEN I STEPPED ON SACRED GROUND AND GOT CURSED. 87 00:04:40,551 --> 00:04:43,681 THEN I DANCED ON SACRED GROUND 88 00:04:43,684 --> 00:04:45,424 AND GOT THE REST OF THE FAMILY CURSED. 89 00:04:45,416 --> 00:04:48,916 STILL NOT HEARING ABOUT THE GIANT NECK. 90 00:04:48,919 --> 00:04:51,989 OKAY, THEN I DECIDED TO GO FOR A RELAXING SWIM 91 00:04:51,992 --> 00:04:54,732 WITH JELLYFISH. TO COVER THE WELTS, I PUT ON A LEI, 92 00:04:54,725 --> 00:04:57,465 ONLY TO DISCOVER THAT I'M ALLERGIC TO THE PLUMERIA FLOWER. 93 00:04:57,468 --> 00:04:59,068 THAT'S HOW I GOT A GIANT NECK. 94 00:04:59,069 --> 00:05:01,329 WAIT A MINUTE. WAIT A MINUTE. 95 00:05:01,332 --> 00:05:03,732 ALL OF THIS IS BECAUSE OF A CURSE? 96 00:05:03,734 --> 00:05:05,614 YES, ALL OF IT. 97 00:05:05,606 --> 00:05:08,776 ME GETTING STUCK IN THE ELEVATOR, TEDDY GETTING KNOCKED OUT, 98 00:05:08,779 --> 00:05:10,509 THE BOYS ALMOST CRASHING IN A HELICOPTER ACCIDENT. 99 00:05:10,511 --> 00:05:13,811 YOU BUYING THAT SHIRT. 100 00:05:13,814 --> 00:05:16,024 WHAT? YOU DON'T LIKE THIS? 101 00:05:16,016 --> 00:05:18,446 I LOST THE RECEIPT. I CAN'T TAKE IT BACK. 102 00:05:18,449 --> 00:05:20,489 THE CURSE! 103 00:05:20,491 --> 00:05:24,091 HONEY, COME ON. THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS A CURSE. 104 00:05:24,094 --> 00:05:27,404 EVERYTHING THAT HAS HAPPENED IS JUST A COINCIDENCE. 105 00:05:28,499 --> 00:05:30,499 ALL RIGHT, YOU KNOW WHAT YOU NEED? 106 00:05:30,501 --> 00:05:32,501 A SIZE 43 TURTLENECK? 107 00:05:34,034 --> 00:05:38,374 HONEY, WHAT YOU NEED IS A NICE RELAXING DAY 108 00:05:38,369 --> 00:05:40,839 AT THE SPA. GO PAMPER YOURSELF. 109 00:05:40,841 --> 00:05:42,341 GET A MASSAGE. GET A STEAM. 110 00:05:42,342 --> 00:05:44,652 JUST GET ALL THIS CURSE STUFF PUT OUT OF YOUR HEAD. 111 00:05:44,645 --> 00:05:46,475 OKAY, MAYBE YOU'RE RIGHT. 112 00:05:46,477 --> 00:05:48,377 I'M OVERREACTING. 113 00:05:48,379 --> 00:05:50,379 OF COURSE YOU ARE. 114 00:05:51,422 --> 00:05:53,052 BOB, HONEY, BE HONEST WITH ME. 115 00:05:53,053 --> 00:05:55,433 HOW BAD DO I LOOK? 116 00:05:55,426 --> 00:05:57,926 EVERY TIME I LOOK AT YOU 117 00:05:57,928 --> 00:06:01,088 ALL I SEE IS MY BEAUTIFUL WIFE. 118 00:06:02,362 --> 00:06:04,842 AW. THAT'S NICE. 119 00:06:07,398 --> 00:06:09,468 ( shudders ) 120 00:06:13,744 --> 00:06:16,784 OKAY, I SAW THIS ON TV. 121 00:06:16,777 --> 00:06:20,077 IF YOU CAN WALK ACROSS THESE COALS, YOU WON'T BE AFRAID OF ANYTHING. 122 00:06:20,080 --> 00:06:22,150 I DON'T KNOW. 123 00:06:22,152 --> 00:06:25,622 COME ON, YOU CAN DO IT. IT'S ALL ABOUT MIND CONTROL. 124 00:06:25,616 --> 00:06:29,086 NOW TAKE A MOMENT TO EMPTY YOUR MIND COMPLETELY. 125 00:06:29,089 --> 00:06:31,759 DONE. 126 00:06:31,762 --> 00:06:34,732 - ALREADY? - LET ME CHECK. 127 00:06:34,725 --> 00:06:36,765 YEAH, DONE. 128 00:06:36,767 --> 00:06:40,427 OKAY, COME ON. 129 00:06:40,431 --> 00:06:44,131 TAKE A DEEP BREATH AND FOCUS. 130 00:06:44,134 --> 00:06:45,744 I'M JUST GONNA GO FIND THE GUY-- 131 00:06:45,736 --> 00:06:48,536 WHOO! 132 00:06:48,539 --> 00:06:50,109 I DID IT. 133 00:06:50,110 --> 00:06:52,140 P.J., THE COALS WEREN'T LIT. 134 00:06:52,142 --> 00:06:56,192 LIT? LIKE FIRE LIT? 135 00:06:56,186 --> 00:06:59,446 YEAH, YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO WALK ACROSS HOT COALS. 136 00:06:59,450 --> 00:07:03,020 BUT THAT WOULD HURT. AND YOU KNOW I SUFFER FROM S.F.S. 137 00:07:03,023 --> 00:07:06,533 - S.F.S.? - SENSITIVE FOOT SYNDROME. 138 00:07:08,959 --> 00:07:10,959 IT'S REAL, GABE. 139 00:07:10,961 --> 00:07:14,101 WHY DO YOU THINK I NEVER PLAYED HOPSCOTCH? 140 00:07:18,909 --> 00:07:22,039 EXCUSE ME, MA'AM, HAVE YOU SEEN-- 141 00:07:22,042 --> 00:07:23,212 OH! 142 00:07:24,645 --> 00:07:26,745 MOM? 143 00:07:26,747 --> 00:07:28,747 WHAT HAPPENED? 144 00:07:28,749 --> 00:07:31,479 FULL BODY MASSAGE. 145 00:07:31,482 --> 00:07:34,832 TURNS OUT THE MASSAGE OIL HAD PLUMERIA IN IT. 146 00:07:34,825 --> 00:07:37,525 DOCTOR SAYS I'M GONNA BE FINE. 147 00:07:37,528 --> 00:07:39,558 IS IT BAD? 148 00:07:42,863 --> 00:07:47,543 NO NO, YOU'VE NEVER LOOKED MORE... 149 00:07:47,538 --> 00:07:51,168 - WHAT? - THAT'S IT. JUST MORE. 150 00:07:53,103 --> 00:07:56,253 LISTEN, MOM, THERE'S SOMETHING THAT I NEED TO TELL YOU. 151 00:07:56,246 --> 00:07:58,506 - IT'S ABOUT CHARLIE. - YEAH? 152 00:07:58,509 --> 00:08:00,249 SHE'S... 153 00:08:00,250 --> 00:08:02,550 DOING THE HULA. 154 00:08:02,553 --> 00:08:05,123 ( sighs ) 155 00:08:05,115 --> 00:08:08,215 OH, THAT'S ADORABLE. 156 00:08:08,218 --> 00:08:10,218 THAT'S THE GREATEST THING I'VE EVER SEEN. 157 00:08:10,220 --> 00:08:12,120 HI, CHARLIE. 158 00:08:13,123 --> 00:08:15,633 ( thundering ) 159 00:08:15,626 --> 00:08:18,726 ( screaming ) 160 00:08:25,275 --> 00:08:29,105 WELCOME TO THE OPPORTUNITY OF A LIFETIME. 161 00:08:29,109 --> 00:08:32,579 A CHANCE TO OWN A TIMESHARE OF PARADISE. 162 00:08:32,583 --> 00:08:35,053 BEFORE WE BEGIN, MR. DUNCAN, 163 00:08:35,045 --> 00:08:36,545 QUICK QUESTION. 164 00:08:36,547 --> 00:08:40,587 I LOST THE RECEIPT. I CAN'T TAKE IT BACK. 165 00:08:40,591 --> 00:08:42,591 IT'S NOT ABOUT YOUR SHIRT. 166 00:08:42,593 --> 00:08:44,193 IS MRS. DUNCAN ON HER WAY? 167 00:08:44,194 --> 00:08:45,864 MAN, I HOPE NOT. 168 00:08:45,856 --> 00:08:49,196 IF BOTH SPOUSES AREN'T AT THE PRESENTATION, 169 00:08:49,199 --> 00:08:53,199 WE'RE GOING TO HAVE TO CHARGE YOU FOR YOUR ENTIRE TRIP. 170 00:08:56,607 --> 00:09:00,307 OKAY, THEN I WILL BE RIGHT BACK WITH MY LOVELY WIFE. 171 00:09:00,310 --> 00:09:03,210 OR SOMEBODY ELSE. 172 00:09:26,266 --> 00:09:28,266 - ( gasps ) - QUICK FAVOR. 173 00:09:28,268 --> 00:09:30,298 I NEED YOU TO PRETEND TO BE MOM. 174 00:09:30,300 --> 00:09:32,800 DAD, REALLY BAD TIME TO GET SUPER WEIRD. 175 00:09:32,803 --> 00:09:35,683 I JUST FOUND OUT THAT MY WIFE HAS 176 00:09:35,676 --> 00:09:37,706 TO BE AT THE TIMESHARE PRESENTATION. 177 00:09:37,708 --> 00:09:40,778 OBVIOUSLY, I CAN'T TAKE MOM. PLEASE. 178 00:09:40,781 --> 00:09:44,051 - THIS IS AN EMERGENCY. - ( sighs ) 179 00:09:46,657 --> 00:09:48,657 ALL RIGHT, FINE, JUST GIVE ME A MINUTE. 180 00:09:50,220 --> 00:09:52,320 - HEY. - OH. 181 00:09:52,322 --> 00:09:53,892 READY FOR OUR DATE? 182 00:09:53,894 --> 00:09:56,704 ACTUALLY, I HAVE ONE MORE SLIGHT DELAY. 183 00:09:56,697 --> 00:09:58,367 I HAVE TO HELP MY DAD WITH SOMETHING. 184 00:09:58,368 --> 00:10:01,328 TEDDY, I'M STARTING TO THINK YOU DON'T WANNA HANG OUT WITH ME. 185 00:10:01,331 --> 00:10:03,301 NO NO NO. NO, I TOTALLY DO. 186 00:10:03,303 --> 00:10:06,383 IT'S NOT GONNA TAKE LONG. I'LL JUST MEET YOU ON THE BEACH IN AN HOUR? 187 00:10:06,376 --> 00:10:08,906 - I'LL BE THERE. - GREAT. 188 00:10:12,683 --> 00:10:15,723 - REALLY GOTTA GO. - DON'T RUSH ME. I'M COMING. 189 00:10:15,716 --> 00:10:19,686 WOW, YOU ARE GONNA BE GREAT AS YOUR MOM. 190 00:10:26,626 --> 00:10:28,626 HEY, WHAT ARE WE DOING UP HERE? 191 00:10:28,628 --> 00:10:30,398 YOU'RE GONNA OVERCOME YOUR FEAR OF HEIGHTS 192 00:10:30,400 --> 00:10:32,660 BY JUMPING OFF THIS CLIFF INTO THE WATER BELOW. 193 00:10:34,765 --> 00:10:37,335 WHOA! ARE YOU CRAZY? 194 00:10:38,909 --> 00:10:40,369 PEOPLE DO IT ALL THE TIME. 195 00:10:40,370 --> 00:10:43,010 YEAH, BUT THOSE PEOPLE ARE PROFESSIONALS. 196 00:10:43,013 --> 00:10:45,183 THERE'S NOTHING TO BE AFRAID OF. 197 00:10:45,175 --> 00:10:48,175 P.J.'s voice: HE'S RIGHT, P.J. IT'S GONNA BE OKAY. 198 00:10:48,178 --> 00:10:51,378 JUST JUMP. 199 00:10:51,381 --> 00:10:55,091 STOP! ARE YOU CRAZY? DO YOU WANNA GET YOURSELF KILLED? 200 00:10:56,356 --> 00:10:59,086 P.J., EMPTY YOUR MIND. 201 00:10:59,089 --> 00:11:02,389 QUIET. I THINK HE CAN HEAR US. 202 00:11:02,392 --> 00:11:05,972 COME ON, YOU CAN DO IT. 203 00:11:10,270 --> 00:11:11,970 I DON'T THINK SO, GABE. 204 00:11:11,972 --> 00:11:14,752 MAYBE I SHOULD START WITH SOMETHING SMALLER? 205 00:11:15,675 --> 00:11:17,375 ( screaming ) 206 00:11:26,056 --> 00:11:29,086 ( laughs ) 207 00:11:29,089 --> 00:11:32,459 P.J. P.J. 208 00:11:33,924 --> 00:11:35,404 YEAH. 209 00:11:35,395 --> 00:11:37,365 WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE DOWN THERE. 210 00:11:37,367 --> 00:11:40,027 LUCKILY THERE WAS A LITTLE LEDGE, SEE? 211 00:11:40,030 --> 00:11:43,070 AND SOME STEPS, SEE? 212 00:11:43,073 --> 00:11:45,313 SO YOU JUMPED FOUR FEET? 213 00:11:45,305 --> 00:11:47,375 AND WHAT A RUSH! 214 00:11:47,377 --> 00:11:49,377 YEAH! 215 00:11:58,118 --> 00:12:01,248 BEFORE WE BEGIN, LET'S GET TO KNOW EACH OTHER A LITTLE. 216 00:12:01,251 --> 00:12:03,291 WHY DON'T WE START WITH THE DUNCANS? 217 00:12:03,293 --> 00:12:06,363 - OF COURSE. - WHY DON'T YOU STAND UP AND INTRODUCE YOURSELVES? 218 00:12:08,328 --> 00:12:10,328 - BOB. - TED-- AMY. 219 00:12:10,330 --> 00:12:13,930 TEDAMY. 220 00:12:13,934 --> 00:12:16,214 TEDAMY? 221 00:12:16,206 --> 00:12:18,066 THAT'S AN INTERESTING NAME. 222 00:12:18,068 --> 00:12:21,768 YEAH, WELL, MY PARENTS WERE REALLY MESSED UP. 223 00:12:21,772 --> 00:12:25,382 SO, BOB AND TEDAMY, 224 00:12:25,375 --> 00:12:27,345 HOW'D THIS HAPPEN? 225 00:12:27,347 --> 00:12:29,047 UH... 226 00:12:29,049 --> 00:12:31,419 HE WAS MY EXTERMINATOR 227 00:12:31,421 --> 00:12:33,421 AND HE CAME OVER TO MY APARTMENT 228 00:12:33,423 --> 00:12:36,433 WITH THAT GIANT TANK OF POISON ON HIS BACK 229 00:12:36,426 --> 00:12:40,356 AND I JUST KNEW THAT BOBBY-BOO WAS THE ONE FOR ME. 230 00:12:40,360 --> 00:12:42,860 JUST SO YOU KNOW, I DON'T WEAR THE TANK ON MY BACK. 231 00:12:42,863 --> 00:12:44,363 NO ONE CARES ABOUT THE DETAILS. 232 00:12:44,364 --> 00:12:47,974 - I CARE. - DO WE HAVE TO DO THIS HERE? 233 00:12:47,968 --> 00:12:51,968 LET'S MEET SOMEONE ELSE, SHALL WE? YOU GUYS. 234 00:12:51,972 --> 00:12:55,552 MAN, IT FEELS GOOD TO CONQUER YOUR FEARS. 235 00:12:55,545 --> 00:12:57,545 P.J., YOU DIDN'T CONQUER ANYTHING. 236 00:12:57,547 --> 00:12:59,447 YOU RAN FROM A CLOWN, 237 00:12:59,449 --> 00:13:01,309 WALKED ACROSS SLIGHTLY WARM COALS 238 00:13:01,311 --> 00:13:03,481 AND JUMPED DOWN FOUR FEET ONTO A LEDGE. 239 00:13:03,483 --> 00:13:05,263 WHICH I DID NOT KNOW WOULD BE THERE. 240 00:13:06,887 --> 00:13:10,457 P.J., I MADE A PROMISE THAT I WOULD DO SOMETHING GOOD. 241 00:13:10,460 --> 00:13:13,320 AND DO YOU KNOW WHO I MADE THAT PROMISE TO? 242 00:13:13,323 --> 00:13:15,433 THE GUY UPSTAIRS. 243 00:13:15,425 --> 00:13:18,065 BILL FROM SEATTLE? 244 00:13:18,068 --> 00:13:20,298 HE SEEMS LIKE A NICE GUY, BUT WHAT DOES HE CARE ABOUT-- 245 00:13:20,300 --> 00:13:22,930 MORE UPSTAIRS. I PROMISED GOD, P.J. 246 00:13:22,933 --> 00:13:24,473 WE GOTTA KEEP TRYING. 247 00:13:24,474 --> 00:13:27,214 FINE. 248 00:13:27,207 --> 00:13:28,907 WELL, I HAVE A FEAR OF BEDSPREADS. 249 00:13:28,909 --> 00:13:31,509 OH, LOOK, I OVERCAME IT. 250 00:13:31,511 --> 00:13:33,481 ACTUALLY, THAT'S A QUILT. 251 00:13:33,483 --> 00:13:37,493 OOH, THIS IS A QUILT? ( sighs ) 252 00:13:37,487 --> 00:13:40,447 FINE. IF YOU WON'T DO IT FOR YOURSELF, 253 00:13:40,450 --> 00:13:43,250 OR ME, DO IT FOR CHARLIE. 254 00:13:43,253 --> 00:13:45,863 SHE LOOKS UP TO YOU. 255 00:13:45,856 --> 00:13:48,456 SHE DOES? 256 00:13:49,499 --> 00:13:52,259 DID YOU SEE THAT? 257 00:13:52,262 --> 00:13:55,012 FINE. I'LL GIVE IT ONE MORE SHOT. 258 00:13:56,606 --> 00:14:00,406 TURNS OUT THERE'S PLUMERIA IN THE SHAMPOO. 259 00:14:04,114 --> 00:14:07,454 BE HONEST, IS IT BAD? 260 00:14:07,447 --> 00:14:09,477 NO NO, YOU LOOK FINE, MOM. 261 00:14:09,479 --> 00:14:12,419 OH, THAT'S GOOD. 262 00:14:12,422 --> 00:14:14,552 ( both shudder ) 263 00:14:17,888 --> 00:14:21,188 REMEMBER, IT'S NOT ABOUT SPENDING MONEY. 264 00:14:21,191 --> 00:14:24,461 IT'S ABOUT SPENDING YOUR VACATION IN PARADISE. 265 00:14:24,464 --> 00:14:27,274 I REALLY NEED TO USE THE RESTROOM. 266 00:14:27,267 --> 00:14:30,297 WE HAVE A BREAK COMING UP IN 90 MINUTES. 267 00:14:30,300 --> 00:14:32,500 I'M GONNA MAKE THIS SIMPLE. 268 00:14:32,502 --> 00:14:35,482 I AM GOING TO PEE NOW. 269 00:14:35,475 --> 00:14:38,545 IS IT GOING TO BE IN A: THAT PLANT? 270 00:14:38,548 --> 00:14:40,648 B: THAT TRASHCAN? 271 00:14:40,650 --> 00:14:43,250 OR C: THE BATHROOM IN THE HALLWAY? 272 00:14:43,253 --> 00:14:45,223 PLEASE GO WITH C. 273 00:14:46,556 --> 00:14:48,956 FINE. YOU MAY LEAVE. 274 00:14:50,490 --> 00:14:52,660 NOW LET'S TALK ABOUT PAYMENT PLANS. 275 00:14:52,662 --> 00:14:55,232 - EXCUSE ME. - YES, TEDAMY. 276 00:14:55,225 --> 00:14:58,065 HOW MUCH LONGER ARE WE GONNA BE HERE? 277 00:14:58,068 --> 00:14:59,928 ONLY FIVE AND A HALF MORE HOURS. 278 00:14:59,930 --> 00:15:03,530 BUT I HAVE A DATE WITH A REALLY CUTE BOY. 279 00:15:03,533 --> 00:15:06,483 I THOUGHT YOU WERE MARRIED. 280 00:15:06,476 --> 00:15:09,976 WELL, I'M MARRIED, NOT DEAD. 281 00:15:13,013 --> 00:15:15,593 IS THERE ANY WAY THAT I CAN LEAVE SOONER? 282 00:15:15,585 --> 00:15:17,985 SURE, SIGN THAT PAPER 283 00:15:17,988 --> 00:15:19,918 AND YOU ARE FREE TO GO RIGHT NOW. 284 00:15:19,919 --> 00:15:21,619 GREAT. OKAY. 285 00:15:23,453 --> 00:15:25,463 ALOHA. 286 00:15:25,455 --> 00:15:29,425 ALL RIGHT, THE BALL IS NOW OFFICIALLY ROLLING. 287 00:15:29,429 --> 00:15:32,699 ( siren wailing ) 288 00:15:32,702 --> 00:15:34,702 ( conch shell blaring ) 289 00:15:36,506 --> 00:15:39,666 ALL I DID WAS GO TO THE BATHROOM. 290 00:15:39,669 --> 00:15:42,039 WE HAVE SOLD OUR FIRST TIMESHARE UNIT. 291 00:15:42,042 --> 00:15:45,382 CONGRATULATIONS, BOB AND TEDAMY DUNCAN. 292 00:15:45,375 --> 00:15:47,045 SHOULD HAVE PICKED THE PLANT. 293 00:15:55,655 --> 00:15:57,655 WHAT DID YOU SAY THIS WAS CALLED AGAIN? 294 00:15:57,657 --> 00:16:00,127 PARASAILING. YOU'RE GONNA GO UP IN THE AIR 295 00:16:00,130 --> 00:16:01,630 - AND GET A GENTLE PEACEFUL-- - UP IN THE AIR? 296 00:16:01,631 --> 00:16:03,491 YOU DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING ABOUT UP IN THE AIR. 297 00:16:03,493 --> 00:16:05,573 WHAT DID YOU THINK THE PARACHUTE WAS FOR? 298 00:16:05,565 --> 00:16:08,535 PARACHUTE? I THOUGHT THIS WAS A VERY COLORFUL CAPE. 299 00:16:09,669 --> 00:16:11,699 HOW DO I GET OUT OF THIS THING? 300 00:16:11,701 --> 00:16:13,371 FINE FINE FINE FINE. 301 00:16:13,373 --> 00:16:16,553 IF YOU DON'T WANNA DO IT, JUST SIGNAL THE GUY ON THE BOAT LIKE THIS. 302 00:16:16,546 --> 00:16:19,646 HEY, BOAT GUY! HEY, BOAT GUY! 303 00:16:19,649 --> 00:16:21,179 ( boat engine starts ) 304 00:16:21,181 --> 00:16:23,151 THAT WAS THE GO SIGNAL, WASN'T IT? 305 00:16:23,153 --> 00:16:25,323 YEP, YOU MIGHT WANNA START RUNNING. 306 00:16:25,315 --> 00:16:27,415 ( screaming ) 307 00:16:31,661 --> 00:16:34,161 I'M KIND OF GLAD WE WEREN'T ABLE TO GET TOGETHER UNTIL NOW 308 00:16:34,164 --> 00:16:36,234 BECAUSE THIS COULD NOT BE MORE PERFECT. 309 00:16:36,226 --> 00:16:38,326 I KNOW. IT'S BEAUTIFUL. 310 00:16:43,633 --> 00:16:45,443 ( P.J. screaming ) 311 00:16:45,435 --> 00:16:47,205 ( screaming ) 312 00:16:51,341 --> 00:16:54,341 KAI, THIS IS MY BROTHER P.J. 313 00:16:54,344 --> 00:16:56,524 P.J., KAI. 314 00:17:05,355 --> 00:17:08,495 TEDDY, WHAT DID YOU DO? 315 00:17:08,498 --> 00:17:10,698 I HAD A DATE ON THE ONE SPOT ON THE BEACH 316 00:17:10,700 --> 00:17:12,430 WHERE IDIOTS FALL OUT OF THE SKY. 317 00:17:13,633 --> 00:17:15,643 I'M TALKING ABOUT THE TIMESHARE. 318 00:17:15,635 --> 00:17:18,305 WE NOW OWN THIS ROOM. 319 00:17:18,308 --> 00:17:21,108 ALL I DID WAS SIGN A PIECE OF PAPER. 320 00:17:21,111 --> 00:17:23,611 WHICH BOUGHT US A TIMESHARE, 321 00:17:23,613 --> 00:17:25,583 WHICH WE CAN'T AFFORD. 322 00:17:25,575 --> 00:17:27,775 YOU ARE THE WORST WIFE I'VE EVER HAD. 323 00:17:29,619 --> 00:17:31,679 WELL, I'M SORRY. WHY DON'T YOU MAKE P.J. YOUR WIFE? 324 00:17:31,681 --> 00:17:33,751 BECAUSE I'M SURE HE'D DO A MUCH BETTER JOB. 325 00:17:33,753 --> 00:17:34,783 ( all arguing ) 326 00:17:34,784 --> 00:17:37,694 QUIET DOWN, PEOPLE. QUIET! 327 00:17:39,729 --> 00:17:42,189 WHY ARE YOU WEARING A MOP? 328 00:17:42,192 --> 00:17:45,372 BECAUSE MY HAIR'S COMING OUT IN CLUMPS. WANNA SEE? 329 00:17:45,365 --> 00:17:46,765 NO NO. MOP'S GOOD. 330 00:17:46,766 --> 00:17:48,696 MOP IT UP. 331 00:17:50,270 --> 00:17:52,800 HEY, KIDS, THERE'S SOMETHING THAT I HAVE TO TELL YOU. 332 00:17:52,802 --> 00:17:55,652 I KNOW THIS IS GONNA SOUND REALLY CRAZY, BUT HERE GOES. 333 00:17:55,645 --> 00:17:57,805 WE'VE BEEN CURSED. 334 00:17:57,807 --> 00:18:00,577 - CURSED? - YES. 335 00:18:00,580 --> 00:18:03,380 BY MANO, A GRUMPY HAWAIIAN MAN 336 00:18:03,383 --> 00:18:07,393 WHO DOES NOT LIKE IT WHEN YOU DO THE ROBOT ON SACRED GROUND. 337 00:18:08,818 --> 00:18:11,218 A CURSE? COME ON. 338 00:18:11,221 --> 00:18:12,861 THINK ABOUT IT. EVERYTHING BAD 339 00:18:12,862 --> 00:18:15,092 STARTED HAPPENING AFTER I GOT US CURSED. 340 00:18:15,094 --> 00:18:17,274 - LIKE THE HELICOPTER. - AND MOM'S FATNESS. 341 00:18:17,267 --> 00:18:19,397 - ME GETTING KNOCKED OUT. - AND MOM'S BALDNESS. 342 00:18:19,399 --> 00:18:21,099 - THE TIMESHARE. - AND MOM'S GROTESQUENESS. 343 00:18:21,100 --> 00:18:23,830 OKAY, GOT IT. 344 00:18:23,833 --> 00:18:25,843 WAIT A SECOND. BACK UP. WHAT'S THIS ABOUT A TIMESHARE? 345 00:18:25,835 --> 00:18:28,135 GO ON AND TELL HER, BOBBY-BOO. 346 00:18:28,138 --> 00:18:32,138 - SHE BOUGHT IT, NOT ME. - YOU BOUGHT A TIMESHARE? 347 00:18:32,142 --> 00:18:34,382 OKAY, THE ONLY REASON WE WERE AT THAT STUPID THING 348 00:18:34,384 --> 00:18:36,394 WAS SO DAD WOULDN'T HAVE TO PAY FOR THE ROOM. 349 00:18:36,386 --> 00:18:38,746 WHOA, BUT LET'S NOT FORGET ABOUT THE CURSE. 350 00:18:38,748 --> 00:18:42,148 OKAY, YOU NOT TELLING ME ABOUT A TIMESHARE HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH A CURSE. 351 00:18:42,152 --> 00:18:44,152 OR DOES IT? 352 00:18:45,795 --> 00:18:47,625 SO THAT'S IT? WE'RE CURSED FOREVER? 353 00:18:47,627 --> 00:18:49,297 NO, WE ARE NOT. 354 00:18:49,299 --> 00:18:52,459 I GOT US INTO THIS MESS, AND NOW I'M GONNA GET US OUT OF IT. 355 00:18:52,462 --> 00:18:54,862 ( slurring ) I'M GONNA FIND MANO AND HAVE HIM REVERSE THE CURSE. 356 00:18:56,406 --> 00:18:58,466 WHAT? 357 00:18:58,468 --> 00:19:01,308 I'LL TELL MANO TO REVERSE THE CURSE. 358 00:19:02,872 --> 00:19:05,482 LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE GOING TO THE DOCTOR AGAIN. PLUMERIA TEA. 359 00:19:05,475 --> 00:19:07,245 OH, NUTS. 360 00:19:13,883 --> 00:19:16,463 HEY, EXCUSE ME. ARE YOU MANO? 361 00:19:16,456 --> 00:19:17,786 I AM MANO. 362 00:19:17,787 --> 00:19:20,857 YEAH, LISTEN, YOU PUT THIS CURSE ON MY FAMILY 363 00:19:20,860 --> 00:19:23,330 AND I WAS JUST WONDERING IF YOU COULD REVERSE IT. 364 00:19:23,333 --> 00:19:24,793 CURSE. 365 00:19:24,794 --> 00:19:27,874 - THERE IS NO CURSE. - THERE ISN'T? 366 00:19:27,867 --> 00:19:30,737 I JUST SAY THAT TO KEEP THE GUESTS OUT OF THE PLANTS. 367 00:19:30,740 --> 00:19:32,800 I'M THE GARDENER. 368 00:19:32,802 --> 00:19:36,282 BUT WHAT ABOUT ALL THE BAD STUFF THAT'S HAPPENED TO US? 369 00:19:36,276 --> 00:19:38,276 JUST GOT LUCKY I GUESS. 370 00:19:38,278 --> 00:19:41,548 MY FAMILY THINKS THE CURSE IS REAL. 371 00:19:41,551 --> 00:19:43,851 TELL THEM IT'S NOT. 372 00:19:43,853 --> 00:19:46,763 I COULD DO THAT. 373 00:19:46,756 --> 00:19:49,186 OR WE COULD HAVE A LITTLE FUN. 374 00:19:49,188 --> 00:19:52,358 YOU SAY THAT WITH AN EVIL LOOK IN YOUR EYE. 375 00:19:52,362 --> 00:19:55,432 THAT GIVES ME PLEASURE. 376 00:19:57,427 --> 00:20:01,427 THE CURSE REMOVAL CEREMONY NOW BEGINS. 377 00:20:03,273 --> 00:20:05,513 WE ARE SO LUCKY HE DOES THIS. 378 00:20:05,505 --> 00:20:08,235 YOU HAVE NO IDEA. 379 00:20:08,238 --> 00:20:11,938 FIRST, THE FAMILY EXCEPT FOR THE YOUNGEST MALE, 380 00:20:11,941 --> 00:20:14,581 MUST CIRCLE THE MOTHER HOPPING 381 00:20:14,584 --> 00:20:18,224 AND CHANTING "BIG AND GROSS. BIG AND GROSS. 382 00:20:18,217 --> 00:20:20,917 SHE'S THE ONE THAT'S CURSED THE MOST." 383 00:20:24,954 --> 00:20:26,864 WHAT SHOULD I DO? 384 00:20:26,856 --> 00:20:30,856 THAT'S THE BEST PART. YOU DO THE ROBOT. 385 00:20:30,860 --> 00:20:33,760 I DO A GOOD ROBOT. 386 00:20:33,763 --> 00:20:37,473 ♪ BIG AND GROSS, BIG AND GROSS ♪ 387 00:20:37,467 --> 00:20:39,737 ♪ SHE'S THE ONE THAT'S CURSED THE MOST ♪ 388 00:20:39,739 --> 00:20:41,869 ♪ BIG AND GROSS, BIG AND GROSS ♪ 389 00:20:41,871 --> 00:20:44,311 ♪ SHE'S THE ONE THAT'S CURSED THE MOST... ♪ 390 00:20:44,314 --> 00:20:46,784 LOOKING GOOD, GUYS. MAKING MEMORIES HERE. 391 00:20:46,776 --> 00:20:48,916 ♪ SHE'S THE ONE THAT'S CURSED THE MOST... ♪ 392 00:20:48,918 --> 00:20:50,848 HOW COME GABE DOESN'T HAVE TO DO THIS? 393 00:20:50,850 --> 00:20:53,320 I DON'T KNOW. SEEMS AWFULLY CHUMMY WITH THAT MANO GUY. 394 00:20:53,323 --> 00:20:55,463 GUYS, I THINK THEY'RE JUST MESSING WITH US. 395 00:20:55,455 --> 00:20:57,685 MR. DUNCAN, THERE YOU ARE. 396 00:20:57,687 --> 00:21:00,927 WE HAD A LITTLE ACCIDENT WITH YOUR TIMESHARE CONTRACT 397 00:21:00,930 --> 00:21:02,960 AND A TIKI TORCH. 398 00:21:02,962 --> 00:21:05,942 SO IF YOU DON'T MIND, WE NEED TO GET YOUR WIFE'S SIGNATURE AGAIN. 399 00:21:05,935 --> 00:21:08,765 IT'S WORKING. KEEP GOING! 400 00:21:08,768 --> 00:21:10,838 ♪ BIG AND GROSS, BIG AND GROSS ♪ 401 00:21:10,840 --> 00:21:13,040 ♪ SHE'S THE ONE THAT'S CURSED THE MOST. ♪ 402 00:21:15,044 --> 00:21:16,754 All right, all right, all right. 403 00:21:16,746 --> 00:21:18,776 I wanna make a toast. I wanna make a toast. 404 00:21:18,778 --> 00:21:20,778 To the love of my life, 405 00:21:20,780 --> 00:21:23,050 my very beautiful wife Amy. 406 00:21:23,052 --> 00:21:25,012 Happy anniversary. 407 00:21:25,014 --> 00:21:28,424 Thank you for making me the luckiest man on Earth. 408 00:21:28,418 --> 00:21:31,958 - I love you. - I love you too. 409 00:21:31,961 --> 00:21:33,021 - Cheers. - Cheers. 410 00:21:33,022 --> 00:21:35,972 Aw, isn't that sweet? 411 00:21:35,965 --> 00:21:39,965 Mom and Dad finally got to have their romantic moment in Hawaii. 412 00:21:39,969 --> 00:21:42,029 As for me, not so much, 413 00:21:42,031 --> 00:21:45,031 but that's okay because family vacations 414 00:21:45,034 --> 00:21:46,884 are about spending time with family. 415 00:21:46,876 --> 00:21:49,906 Teddy, wanna go for a walk? 416 00:21:49,909 --> 00:21:52,009 Here, wrap this up. 417 00:21:52,011 --> 00:21:54,641 What am I supposed-- Goodbye, Charlie. 418 00:21:54,644 --> 00:21:56,924 All: Good luck, Charlie. 419 00:21:56,916 --> 00:21:59,086 Whatever. 420 00:22:04,323 --> 00:22:07,403 HI, I'M P.J. DUNCAN. 421 00:22:07,397 --> 00:22:10,497 TONIGHT, WE'VE HAD A LOT OF FUN WITH THE SUBJECT OF S.F.S-- 422 00:22:10,500 --> 00:22:11,830 SENSITIVE FOOT SYNDROME. 423 00:22:11,831 --> 00:22:14,931 BUT SENSITIVE FOOT SYNDROME IS A SERIOUS PROBLEM 424 00:22:14,934 --> 00:22:18,544 THAT AFFECTS ALMOST A DOZEN PEOPLE ACROSS THE GLOBE. 425 00:22:18,538 --> 00:22:21,338 COME, WALK WITH ME. ( wincing ) 426 00:22:23,643 --> 00:22:26,623 IT IS A PARTICULARLY SENSITIVE DAY. 427 00:22:26,616 --> 00:22:31,046 NOW YOU SEE WHAT ME HAVE TO GO THROUGH. GUYS 428 00:22:31,050 --> 00:22:34,050 - HEY, WHAT YOU DOING? ABOUT S.F.S.G PEOPLE 429 00:22:34,053 --> 00:22:36,663 P.J., THERE'S NO SUCH THING. IT DOESN'T EXIST. 430 00:22:36,656 --> 00:22:40,556 REALLY? OH, WHAT A RELIEF. 30979

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