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1
00:00:07,841 --> 00:00:10,041
HEY, EVERYBODY,
I'M HOME.
2
00:00:10,078 --> 00:00:11,448
( laugh track playing )
3
00:00:11,479 --> 00:00:13,449
( sighs )
4
00:00:13,481 --> 00:00:15,781
- AND I'VE GOT PRESENTS.
- YES! WHOO! AWESOME.
5
00:00:15,816 --> 00:00:18,586
- HI, DAD.
- DADDY, WE MISSED YOU.
6
00:00:18,619 --> 00:00:20,589
I LOVE YOU, PRESENTS.
7
00:00:20,621 --> 00:00:23,421
I MEAN DAD!
8
00:00:23,457 --> 00:00:25,357
OKAY, SO I'M DOING
9
00:00:25,393 --> 00:00:28,433
AN EXTERMINATION JOB
OVER AT LOONY LARRY'S
ELECTRONICS.
10
00:00:28,462 --> 00:00:32,202
HE WAS INFESTED WITH TERMITES,
RATS AND GREAT DEALS!
11
00:00:32,233 --> 00:00:35,443
Kids:
BECAUSE HE'S LOONY!
12
00:00:35,469 --> 00:00:38,839
OKAY, FOR P.J.
13
00:00:38,872 --> 00:00:42,412
- FOR TEDDY.
- SMART PHONES, AWESOME!
14
00:00:42,443 --> 00:00:45,313
- THANK YOU SO MUCH.
- WHERE'S MY SMART PHONE?
15
00:00:45,346 --> 00:00:48,316
P.J.'S HOLDING IT.
YOU'RE GONNA GET IT
IN ABOUT FOUR YEARS.
16
00:00:49,517 --> 00:00:53,187
BUT FOR YOU I GOT
A REMOTE-CONTROL
HELICOPTER!
17
00:00:53,221 --> 00:00:55,491
- THIS IS COOL.
- ...THAT WE PUT TOGETHER
OURSELVES.
18
00:00:55,523 --> 00:00:58,293
- RUINED IT.
- WHAT?
19
00:00:58,326 --> 00:01:00,286
I THOUGHT THIS WOULD BE
A FUN FATHER-SON PROJECT.
20
00:01:00,328 --> 00:01:03,528
OKAY, WHY DON'T YOU PUT IT
TOGETHER WITH YOUR FATHER
21
00:01:03,564 --> 00:01:06,104
AND GIVE ME A CALL.
22
00:01:06,134 --> 00:01:09,374
AND I EVEN GOT
23
00:01:09,403 --> 00:01:11,543
A LITTLE SOMETHING
FOR CHARLIE.
24
00:01:15,343 --> 00:01:17,113
* I'm a happy happy horse
25
00:01:17,145 --> 00:01:18,405
* Happy happy
happy horse *
26
00:01:18,446 --> 00:01:20,176
* I'm a happy happy horse
27
00:01:20,214 --> 00:01:22,154
* Happy happy
happy horse *
28
00:01:22,183 --> 00:01:24,253
( whinnies )
29
00:01:24,285 --> 00:01:26,245
- * I'm a happy
happy horse... *
- WOW.
30
00:01:26,287 --> 00:01:29,187
- THAT'S GONNA GET OLD.
- I THINK IT JUST DID.
31
00:01:31,492 --> 00:01:33,162
( rock music playing )
32
00:01:33,194 --> 00:01:34,534
* TODAY'S ALL BURNT TOAST
33
00:01:34,562 --> 00:01:36,202
* RUNNING LATE,
AND DAD SAYS *
34
00:01:36,230 --> 00:01:38,630
* HAS ANYBODY
SEEN MY LEFT SHOE? *
35
00:01:38,666 --> 00:01:40,526
* I CLOSE MY EYES,
TAKE A BITE *
36
00:01:40,568 --> 00:01:42,538
* GRAB A RIDE,
LAUGH OUT LOUD *
37
00:01:42,570 --> 00:01:44,440
* THERE IT IS
UP ON THE ROOF *
38
00:01:46,174 --> 00:01:49,144
* I'VE BEEN THERE,
I'VE SURVIVED *
39
00:01:49,177 --> 00:01:52,407
* SO JUST TAKE
MY ADVICE *
40
00:01:52,446 --> 00:01:55,576
* HANG IN THERE, BABY,
THINGS ARE CRAZY *
41
00:01:55,616 --> 00:01:58,546
* BUT I KNOW
YOUR FUTURE'S BRIGHT *
42
00:01:58,586 --> 00:02:00,586
* HANG IN THERE, BABY
43
00:02:00,621 --> 00:02:02,321
* THERE'S NO MAYBE
44
00:02:02,356 --> 00:02:05,226
* EVERYTHING
TURNS OUT ALL RIGHT *
45
00:02:05,259 --> 00:02:07,529
* YOUR LIFE
IS UP AND DOWN *
46
00:02:07,561 --> 00:02:11,231
* BUT TRUST ME,
IT COMES BACK AROUND *
47
00:02:11,265 --> 00:02:14,595
* YOU'RE GONNA LOVE
WHO YOU TURN OUT TO BE *
48
00:02:16,237 --> 00:02:18,637
* HANG IN THERE, BABY.
49
00:02:27,481 --> 00:02:30,551
( squeals )
SO MUCH.Y NEW PHONE
50
00:02:30,584 --> 00:02:33,954
SEE, IT SURFS THE WEB,
IT TAKES VIDEO, PLAYS MUSIC.
51
00:02:33,987 --> 00:02:37,687
WE'RE JUST SO HAPPY
TOGETHER.
52
00:02:37,725 --> 00:02:41,325
MAN, THE LAST PRESENT MY DAD
GOT FOR ME WAS A BOOK--
53
00:02:41,362 --> 00:02:43,732
CALLED "FUN WITH SCIENCE."
AND GUESS WHAT?
54
00:02:43,764 --> 00:02:45,674
THE TITLE WAS A LIE.
55
00:02:45,699 --> 00:02:47,739
OOOH, HEY,
YOU WANT TO CHECK OUT
56
00:02:47,768 --> 00:02:50,338
THE TRAILER FOR THE NEW
VAMPIRE MOVIE "DUSK"?
57
00:02:50,371 --> 00:02:52,471
OOOH, YOU KNOW I DO.
58
00:02:52,506 --> 00:02:55,206
- OOOH.
- THOSE VAMPIRES ARE SO CUTE.
59
00:02:55,243 --> 00:02:58,983
THERE MUST BE SOMETHING
GIVES YOU ROCK-HARD ABS.
60
00:02:59,012 --> 00:03:02,352
OH, HEY, WE SHOULD GO
TO THE FIRST SHOW.
61
00:03:02,383 --> 00:03:04,353
WHICH IS...
62
00:03:04,385 --> 00:03:06,985
OH, THURSDAY AT MIDNIGHT.
63
00:03:07,020 --> 00:03:10,290
MY MOM WOULD NEVER
ON A SCHOOL NIGHT.TE
64
00:03:10,324 --> 00:03:13,294
JUST DO WHAT I DO--
TELL YOUR MOM HOW COOL SHE IS.
65
00:03:13,327 --> 00:03:15,497
THEN YOU GET
WHATEVER YOU WANT.
66
00:03:15,529 --> 00:03:17,699
THAT REALLY WORKS?
67
00:03:17,731 --> 00:03:21,371
HOW DO YOU THINK
I CAN'T SIT DOWN IN?KIRT
68
00:03:23,271 --> 00:03:26,771
I DON'T KNOW.
A VERY GOOD LIAR.
69
00:03:26,807 --> 00:03:29,677
- THAT SCARF LOOKS
REALLY GREAT ON YOU.
- DOESN'T IT?
70
00:03:29,710 --> 00:03:31,610
YEAH, I COULD TOTALLY
PULL THIS OFF.
71
00:03:42,356 --> 00:03:44,426
I HOPE WE END UP BEING
LAB PARTNERS, DUDE.
72
00:03:44,458 --> 00:03:46,458
- I DON'T.
- WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?
73
00:03:46,494 --> 00:03:48,234
DON'T MAKE ME SAY IT.
74
00:03:50,364 --> 00:03:52,574
- OH, YES, I GOT WALTER!
- OH, GREAT.
75
00:03:52,600 --> 00:03:54,570
YOU GET THE PRESIDENT
OF THE SCIENCE CLUB,
76
00:03:54,602 --> 00:03:57,272
AND I'M STUCK WITH
THIS DUMB LUG VAN BRUNDT.
77
00:03:57,305 --> 00:03:59,605
- WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?
- I SAID--
78
00:03:59,640 --> 00:04:02,810
I'D... I'D LOVE TO GIVE
A HUG TO VAN BRUNDT.
79
00:04:02,843 --> 00:04:04,583
DON'T!
80
00:04:04,612 --> 00:04:06,352
OKAY...
81
00:04:06,380 --> 00:04:08,520
LAB PARTNER BUDDY.
82
00:04:08,549 --> 00:04:09,819
MY PHONE NUMBER.
83
00:04:09,850 --> 00:04:12,350
CALL ME WHEN IT'S DONE.
84
00:04:12,386 --> 00:04:14,046
- YOU GOT IT, BIG GUY.
- DON'T CALL ME BIG GUY.
85
00:04:14,087 --> 00:04:16,557
VERY SORRY.
86
00:04:19,427 --> 00:04:21,497
HEY, GREAT NEWS--
WE'RE PARTNERS.
87
00:04:21,529 --> 00:04:25,499
YEAH, THERE'S NO NEED
FOR US TO GET TOGETHER.
88
00:04:25,533 --> 00:04:28,303
I'LL DO THE PROJECT AND PUT
BOTH OF OUR NAMES ON IT.
89
00:04:28,336 --> 00:04:31,536
OH, I LOVE YOU, MAN!
90
00:04:40,080 --> 00:04:42,080
HEY, WHATCHA DOING, MOM?
91
00:04:42,115 --> 00:04:44,645
OH, JUST GOING
THROUGH THE SPICES,
TOSSING OUT THE OLD ONES.
92
00:04:44,685 --> 00:04:47,285
OH, THAT IS SO COOL.
93
00:04:48,889 --> 00:04:53,089
- IT IS?
- WELL, MAYBE IT'S JUST
THE WAY YOU DO IT.
94
00:04:53,126 --> 00:04:55,726
WELL, I DO HAVE A SYSTEM.
95
00:04:55,763 --> 00:04:57,833
IT'S ALPHABETICAL.
96
00:04:59,800 --> 00:05:03,500
OKAY, CARDAMOM COMES
BEFORE CINNAMON WHICH
COMES BEFORE CORIANDER.
97
00:05:03,537 --> 00:05:07,337
WHOA, I COULD LISTEN TO YOU
TALK ABOUT SPICES ALL DAY.
98
00:05:07,375 --> 00:05:10,335
- THEN WE GO ONTO DILL...
- OKAY.
99
00:05:10,378 --> 00:05:13,348
THEN IT KIND OF
JUMPS AROUND TO FENNEL.
100
00:05:13,381 --> 00:05:17,121
BUT INSTEAD, HOW ABOUT
WE TALK ABOUT CLOTHES?
101
00:05:17,150 --> 00:05:19,350
LIKE THAT AWESOME NEW TOP
YOU'RE WEARING.
102
00:05:19,387 --> 00:05:21,587
YOU LIKE THIS?
HONEY, I'VE HAD IT FOREVER.
103
00:05:21,622 --> 00:05:24,592
AND I ESPECIALLY LOVE
THAT SPLASH OF COLOR
ON YOUR SHOULDER.
104
00:05:24,625 --> 00:05:26,355
WHAT, THAT?
105
00:05:26,394 --> 00:05:28,334
I THINK THAT'S
CHARLIE'S PUKE.
106
00:05:29,430 --> 00:05:31,770
LET'S TALK
ABOUT YOUR SHOES.
107
00:05:31,799 --> 00:05:34,499
( phone rings )
108
00:05:34,535 --> 00:05:37,365
HELLO?
OH, HEY, IVY.
109
00:05:37,405 --> 00:05:38,765
YOU WANT ME TO COME OVER?
110
00:05:38,806 --> 00:05:41,436
OH NO, SORRY.
I'D RATHER HANG OUT
WITH MY MOM.
111
00:05:41,475 --> 00:05:44,545
OKAY, TALK TO YOU LATER.
BYE.
112
00:05:46,814 --> 00:05:49,424
ARE YOU SICK?
ARE YOU GONNA
PUKE ON ME TOO?
113
00:05:51,652 --> 00:05:53,622
UH, NO, WHY?
114
00:05:53,654 --> 00:05:55,524
YOU'D RATHER HANG OUT
WITH ME THAN IVY?
115
00:05:55,556 --> 00:05:58,686
MOM, DOES CINNAMON
COME BEFORE CORIANDER?
116
00:06:01,562 --> 00:06:04,362
THAT IS THE SWEETEST THING
YOU HAVE EVER SAID TO ME.
117
00:06:07,167 --> 00:06:08,767
MY LITTLE WOOSKIE.
118
00:06:11,839 --> 00:06:14,579
( mechanism winding down )
* I'm a happy happy horse
119
00:06:14,608 --> 00:06:16,678
* Happy happy
happy horse *
120
00:06:16,710 --> 00:06:19,710
* Happy happy happy horse...
121
00:06:19,747 --> 00:06:22,517
( sick-sounding whinny )
122
00:06:22,550 --> 00:06:25,420
YEAH, SOUNDS LIKE HAPPY HORSE
NEEDS SOME NEW BATTERIES.
123
00:06:25,453 --> 00:06:29,563
NO! I CAN'T GET
THAT STUPID SONG
OUT OF MY HEAD.
124
00:06:30,758 --> 00:06:33,558
ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.
YOU KNOW WHAT?
125
00:06:33,594 --> 00:06:36,634
LET'S BUILD US
A HELICOPTER.
126
00:06:36,664 --> 00:06:39,874
( chuckles )
AND THE FUN BEGINS
127
00:06:39,900 --> 00:06:42,200
WITH THE INSTRUCTION MANUAL.
128
00:06:42,235 --> 00:06:43,635
DAD, DO WE HAVE TO?
129
00:06:43,671 --> 00:06:46,571
YES, WE HAVE TO.
OH! YOU KNOW WHAT?
130
00:06:46,607 --> 00:06:49,507
WE SHOULD START WITH
THE "BEFORE YOU BEGIN"
PAMPHLET.
131
00:06:49,543 --> 00:06:52,213
OH, AND THERE'S A DVD!
WHICH WE WILL WATCH
132
00:06:52,245 --> 00:06:55,675
AFTER THE PAMPHLET
AND THE INSTRUCTION MANUAL.
133
00:06:56,850 --> 00:06:59,520
DAD, HOW LONG
IS THIS GONNA TAKE?
134
00:06:59,553 --> 00:07:01,623
OH, NOT LONG.
OH, HEY, LOOK AT THIS!
135
00:07:01,655 --> 00:07:04,885
OOOH, A "BEFORE YOU
WATCH THE DVD" CARD.
136
00:07:12,500 --> 00:07:14,470
( squeals )
IF THERE'S ANYTHING BETTER
137
00:07:14,502 --> 00:07:17,672
THAN A HOMEMADE FACIAL
WITH MY "BMF," I HAVEN'T
HEARD OF IT.
138
00:07:17,705 --> 00:07:20,465
- B.M.F.?
- BEST MOM FOREVER.
139
00:07:20,508 --> 00:07:23,808
OH MY GOSH!
I WOULD BE SMILING,
BUT MY FACE IS GOING TO CRACK.
140
00:07:23,844 --> 00:07:25,754
( laughing )
141
00:07:25,779 --> 00:07:27,479
WHAT'S GOING ON?
142
00:07:27,515 --> 00:07:29,475
OH, JUST A COUPLE GIRLFRIENDS
HANGING OUT.
143
00:07:29,517 --> 00:07:31,547
WHAT, IS IVY HERE?
144
00:07:31,585 --> 00:07:33,485
NO, I'M TALKING
ABOUT ME AND MOM.
145
00:07:33,521 --> 00:07:34,961
WE'VE BEEN HANGING OUT
ALL AFTERNOON.
146
00:07:34,988 --> 00:07:37,728
WE WENT TO THE MALL.
WE WENT SHOPPING.
147
00:07:37,758 --> 00:07:41,958
- THEN WE DID SOME OTHER STUFF
I CAN'T TELL YOU ABOUT.
- SHHH.
148
00:07:41,995 --> 00:07:45,725
- YEAH, WELL, I DIDN'T ASK.
- THAT'S GOOD 'CAUSE WE'RE NOT
GONNA TELL YOU.
149
00:07:45,766 --> 00:07:49,036
YEAH, I'M GONNA BE
IN THE OTHER ROOM.
150
00:07:49,069 --> 00:07:52,509
OH, UH, DAD, I ACTUALLY
NEED TO ASK YOU GUYS
ABOUT SOMETHING.
151
00:07:52,540 --> 00:07:56,010
IS IT OKAY IF IVY AND I GO TO
A MIDNIGHT MOVIE ON THURSDAY?
152
00:07:56,043 --> 00:07:57,883
THURSDAY?
NO WAY, IT'S A SCHOOL NIGHT.
153
00:08:03,584 --> 00:08:05,794
BOB, HONEY, YOU DON'T
UNDERSTAND, OKAY?
154
00:08:05,819 --> 00:08:08,759
THIS ISN'T JUST ANY MOVIE.
THIS IS "DUSK."
155
00:08:09,823 --> 00:08:12,063
- WHAT'S THAT?
- HELLO!
156
00:08:12,092 --> 00:08:14,732
THE MOVIE ABOUT
THE VAMPIRES.
157
00:08:14,762 --> 00:08:16,602
THE PREQUEL TO "DAWN."
158
00:08:16,630 --> 00:08:18,800
SO LAME!
159
00:08:18,832 --> 00:08:22,302
ALL RIGHT, YOU KNOW WHAT?
YOU WANNA LET HER GO,
LET HER GO.
160
00:08:22,335 --> 00:08:24,805
- OKAY! THANK YOU, DADDY.
THANK YOU, GIRLFRIEND.
- TEDDY.
161
00:08:24,838 --> 00:08:26,668
* OOOH!
UH UH *
162
00:08:26,707 --> 00:08:28,577
( kisses )
* CALL ME!
163
00:08:33,914 --> 00:08:35,824
WHAT'S THAT IN YOUR HAIR?
164
00:08:35,849 --> 00:08:37,989
IT'S CALLED GLITTER.
GET WITH IT, GRANDPA.
165
00:08:43,323 --> 00:08:45,633
EMMETT!
THANK YOU.
166
00:08:45,659 --> 00:08:48,599
I CAN'T BELIEVE I HAVE
TO DO THIS WHOLE CHEMISTRY
PROJECT BY MYSELF.
167
00:08:48,629 --> 00:08:51,569
- STUPID VAN BRUNDT!
- HEY, DON'T CALL HIM STUPID.
168
00:08:51,599 --> 00:08:53,869
THAT'S AN INSULT TO STUPID
PEOPLE EVERYWHERE.
169
00:08:55,636 --> 00:08:57,766
THAT IDIOT CAN'T EVEN
COUNT TO 10,
170
00:08:57,805 --> 00:09:00,865
WHICH, COINCIDENTALLY,
IS THE NUMBER OF YEARS HE'S
GOING TO BE IN HIGH SCHOOL.
171
00:09:02,743 --> 00:09:04,613
( phone chimes )
172
00:09:04,645 --> 00:09:06,805
GUESS THAT'S MY PHONE.
173
00:09:06,847 --> 00:09:09,917
OH, THAT'S WEIRD.
IT SAYS I HAVE A CALL
IN PROGRESS.
174
00:09:09,950 --> 00:09:12,590
YOU PROBABLY SAT ON IT
AND BUTT-DIALED SOMEONE.
175
00:09:12,620 --> 00:09:14,760
HELLO?
NOBODY THERE.
176
00:09:14,788 --> 00:09:16,758
- MUST HAVE GOTTEN VOICEMAIL.
- WHO'D YOU DIAL?
177
00:09:16,790 --> 00:09:18,890
VAN BRUNDT.
VAN BRUNDT!
178
00:09:18,926 --> 00:09:21,626
HE'S GONNA HEAR EVERYTHING
WE JUST SAID ABOUT HIM!
179
00:09:21,662 --> 00:09:24,102
YOU MEAN HE'S GOING
TO HEAR EVERYTHING YOU
JUST SAID ABOUT HIM.
180
00:09:24,131 --> 00:09:28,341
- WE WERE BOTH
TALKING ABOUT HIM, EMMETT.
- STOP SAYING MY NAME!
181
00:09:28,368 --> 00:09:30,168
- AND HANG UP THE PHONE!
- YES!
182
00:09:36,677 --> 00:09:38,647
- HEY-YYYY!
- HEY.
183
00:09:38,679 --> 00:09:42,679
SO DID MY EVIL PLAN WORK?
DID YOU BUTTER UP YOUR MOM?
184
00:09:42,716 --> 00:09:45,346
LIKE POPCORN
AT A MIDNIGHT MOVIE!
185
00:09:45,385 --> 00:09:47,115
( squeals )
186
00:09:47,154 --> 00:09:49,824
- ( phone chimes )
- WHAT WAS THAT?
187
00:09:49,857 --> 00:09:52,857
OH, IT'S JUST MY PHONE.
IT'S ALWAYS MAKING
WEIRD NOISES.
188
00:09:52,893 --> 00:09:54,933
SO HOW'D YOU DO IT?
189
00:09:54,962 --> 00:09:57,102
OH, IT WAS SO PAINFUL.
190
00:09:57,130 --> 00:10:00,000
I had to spend
the whole day with her
pretending she was cool.
191
00:10:00,033 --> 00:10:02,643
Longest day of my life.
192
00:10:02,670 --> 00:10:04,100
BUT IT WAS ALL WORTH IT
193
00:10:04,137 --> 00:10:07,137
BECAUSE WE'RE GOING
TO SEE "DUSK"!
194
00:10:07,174 --> 00:10:08,884
( laughter )
195
00:10:08,909 --> 00:10:11,709
"WHEN THE SUN GOES DOWN,
HIS FANGS COME OUT."
196
00:10:11,745 --> 00:10:15,015
- AND HIS SHIRT COMES OFF!
- WHOOO!
197
00:10:15,048 --> 00:10:17,048
( cheering )
198
00:10:29,930 --> 00:10:34,130
IT WAS ALL JUST A BIG TRICK
SO TEDDY COULD GET PERMISSION
TO SEE THAT VAMPIRE MOVIE.
199
00:10:34,167 --> 00:10:38,767
BOB, SHE THINKS I'M JUST
AS UNCOOL AS I THOUGHT
MY MOM WAS.
200
00:10:38,806 --> 00:10:43,076
IT'S THE GREAT
UNCOOL CIRCLE OF LIFE.
201
00:10:43,110 --> 00:10:46,080
WELL, HONEY, IF IT HELPS,
I THINK YOU'RE COOL.
202
00:10:47,080 --> 00:10:49,120
IT DOESN'T.
203
00:10:50,918 --> 00:10:52,988
ALL RIGHT, SO WHAT'S
THE PUNISHMENT GOING TO BE?
204
00:10:53,020 --> 00:10:55,020
NO MOVIE,
GROUNDED FOR A WEEK?
205
00:10:55,055 --> 00:10:58,885
HUH-UH.
TOO EASY.
206
00:10:58,926 --> 00:11:01,956
MAMA'S GOING TO GET EVEN.
207
00:11:01,995 --> 00:11:03,755
YOU KNOW NOTHING GOOD
EVER HAPPENS
208
00:11:03,797 --> 00:11:05,727
WHEN YOU START CALLING
YOURSELF "MAMA."
209
00:11:05,766 --> 00:11:08,036
MAMA DOESN'T CARE.
210
00:11:13,140 --> 00:11:15,840
- ( sparking )
- ( grunting )
211
00:11:18,145 --> 00:11:19,945
THERE HE IS.
212
00:11:19,980 --> 00:11:23,080
GUESS WE SHOULD JUST
GO IN THERE AND GET
IT OVER WITH.
213
00:11:23,116 --> 00:11:25,486
MAN, I HATE
GETTING BEAT UP.
214
00:11:25,518 --> 00:11:29,718
- YOU'VE BEEN BEAT UP BEFORE?
- NO, BUT I'VE HEARD BAD THINGS.
215
00:11:29,757 --> 00:11:31,257
HEY, DUNCAN, GET IN HERE!
216
00:11:37,865 --> 00:11:39,725
HOW ARE YOU DOING
ON OUR PROJECT?
217
00:11:39,767 --> 00:11:41,867
OKAY.
218
00:11:44,037 --> 00:11:46,807
- THAT'S ALL YOU WANTED
TO TALK ABOUT?
- OH, I'M SORRY.
219
00:11:46,840 --> 00:11:48,980
I LOVE WHAT YOU'VE
DONE WITH YOUR HAIR.
220
00:11:50,878 --> 00:11:55,248
SO... HEARD ANY INTERESTING
PHONE MESSAGES LATELY?
221
00:11:55,282 --> 00:11:59,952
NO, MRS. JETER
CAUGHT ME TEXTING IN CLASS
AND TOOK MY PHONE AWAY.
222
00:11:59,987 --> 00:12:02,157
- OHH.
- WHAT?!
223
00:12:02,189 --> 00:12:05,289
THAT-- THAT'S TERRIBLE.
DON'T YOU HATE IT WHEN
PEOPLE JUST TAKE YOUR PHONE
224
00:12:05,325 --> 00:12:07,855
AND PUT IT-- WHERE EXACTLY?
225
00:12:07,895 --> 00:12:11,765
IT'S IN HER DESK.
I'M GETTING IT BACK
AT THE END OF THE DAY.
226
00:12:11,799 --> 00:12:13,199
I'M TIRED OF TALKING!
227
00:12:18,538 --> 00:12:20,168
- HEY.
- HEY.
228
00:12:20,207 --> 00:12:21,937
AREN'T YOU HOME FROM SCHOOL
A LITTLE EARLY?
229
00:12:21,975 --> 00:12:24,205
WE'VE GOT A HELICOPTER
TO FLY.
230
00:12:24,244 --> 00:12:26,084
AND I'M ONLY MISSING P.E.
231
00:12:26,113 --> 00:12:29,783
( softly )
AND ENGLISH AND MATH.
232
00:12:29,817 --> 00:12:31,947
ALL RIGHT, LET'S GET
THIS BIRD IN THE AIR.
233
00:12:34,321 --> 00:12:37,291
- WHOA!
- HOW'D YOU DO THAT?
234
00:12:37,324 --> 00:12:40,294
- I DON'T KNOW.
- IS IT VOICE-ACTIVATED?
235
00:12:40,327 --> 00:12:44,197
UH... STOP.
236
00:12:44,231 --> 00:12:47,071
DOWN!
237
00:12:47,100 --> 00:12:49,900
- NO.
- Both: WHOA!
238
00:12:51,371 --> 00:12:53,541
YOU MUST HAVE PUT IT
TOGETHER WRONG.
239
00:12:53,573 --> 00:12:56,343
NO NO, THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE.
I FOLLOWED ALL THE INSTRUCTIONS.
240
00:12:57,344 --> 00:12:59,914
WHOA!
( screaming )
241
00:13:02,983 --> 00:13:05,923
- WHERE'S THE REMOTE?
- ( sobs ) I DON'T KNOW!
242
00:13:15,162 --> 00:13:17,232
OH, DAD, DO SOMETHING!
243
00:13:17,264 --> 00:13:20,204
I AM--
I'M MAKING A RUN FOR IT!
244
00:13:20,233 --> 00:13:22,803
( screams, crashes )
245
00:13:28,408 --> 00:13:30,378
OKAY, THE COAST IS CLEAR.
LET'S GO.
246
00:13:30,410 --> 00:13:32,910
JUST GET THE PHONE
AND GET OUT OF HERE.
247
00:13:35,916 --> 00:13:37,146
OKAY, I GOT IT.
LET'S GO.
248
00:13:37,184 --> 00:13:39,254
- ( voices talking )
- OH. OH JEEZ!
249
00:13:39,286 --> 00:13:41,216
- HERE YOU GO.
- WHAT DO YOU MEAN!?
250
00:13:41,254 --> 00:13:43,994
I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO.
PUT IT AWAY.
251
00:13:46,359 --> 00:13:49,329
- THAT ATTITUDE
BETTER CHANGE, BUDDY.
- YES, MA'AM.
252
00:13:50,330 --> 00:13:52,370
WHAT ARE YOU BOYS
DOING IN HERE?
253
00:13:52,399 --> 00:13:55,199
WE HAD A CHEMISTRY QUESTION.
254
00:13:55,235 --> 00:13:58,205
- WHICH IS?
- AHEM, UM...
255
00:13:58,238 --> 00:14:00,208
WE WERE WONDERING...
256
00:14:00,240 --> 00:14:02,610
WHAT'S BORON MADE OF.
257
00:14:02,642 --> 00:14:05,252
BORON.
258
00:14:05,278 --> 00:14:07,208
TOLD YA!
259
00:14:07,247 --> 00:14:09,947
WELL, I STAND CORRECTED.
260
00:14:11,184 --> 00:14:13,154
CAN I HAVE
MY PHONE NOW?
261
00:14:15,288 --> 00:14:17,288
HERE YOU GO.
262
00:14:19,259 --> 00:14:21,289
WAIT A MINUTE--
WHERE'S MY PHONE?
263
00:14:23,263 --> 00:14:27,303
UH, GEORGE, CAN I MAKE
A QUICK CALL ON YOUR PHONE?
264
00:14:27,334 --> 00:14:29,304
PLEASE?
265
00:14:29,336 --> 00:14:32,906
THANK YOU.
OH OH OHHH!
266
00:14:39,346 --> 00:14:42,316
- WHOOPS.
- WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?
267
00:14:42,349 --> 00:14:44,379
UM, I GUESS
268
00:14:44,417 --> 00:14:46,447
I'M THE "BORON" NOW.
269
00:14:46,486 --> 00:14:50,086
- YOU OWE ME A PHONE!
- GLADLY.
270
00:14:50,123 --> 00:14:52,263
( rings )
271
00:14:52,292 --> 00:14:55,032
- OKAY, P.J., LET'S GO.
- WAIT.
272
00:14:55,062 --> 00:14:58,372
IS THAT MY PHONE RINGING
IN YOUR PANTS?
273
00:15:04,371 --> 00:15:06,441
HELLO?
274
00:15:06,473 --> 00:15:09,083
HOLD ON.
IT'S FOR YOU.
275
00:15:14,181 --> 00:15:17,381
I CAN'T BELIEVE WE'RE HERE!
THIS IS LIKE A DREAM.
276
00:15:17,417 --> 00:15:19,487
A DREAM WHERE WE GET
TO FLIRT WITH CUTE GUYS,
277
00:15:19,519 --> 00:15:21,489
WATCH A MOVIE
ABOUT CUTE GUYS
278
00:15:21,521 --> 00:15:24,121
WHILE SITTING
NEXT TO CUTE GUYS.
279
00:15:27,027 --> 00:15:30,957
THE MIDNIGHT SHOWING
OF "DUSK" IS SOLD OUT.
280
00:15:30,998 --> 00:15:32,468
( squealing )
281
00:15:36,536 --> 00:15:38,106
OH NO.
282
00:15:38,138 --> 00:15:39,738
- WHAT?
- LOOK!
283
00:15:39,772 --> 00:15:42,282
( squeals )
284
00:15:42,309 --> 00:15:45,109
- HEY, GIRLFRIEND!
- HEY HEY.
285
00:15:45,145 --> 00:15:46,505
WHAT ARE YOU
DOING HERE?
286
00:15:46,546 --> 00:15:49,146
WHAT AM I DOING?
I'M HANGING OUT
WITH MY "BFD,"
287
00:15:49,182 --> 00:15:51,382
MY BEST FRIEND DAUGHTER.
RIGHT?
288
00:15:51,418 --> 00:15:54,318
'CAUSE THAT'S WHAT
ALL THE COOL MOMS DO,
RIGHT, MARY LOU?
289
00:15:54,354 --> 00:15:56,324
ALL NIGHT LONG!
290
00:15:56,356 --> 00:16:01,526
WHOO, IVY!
ISN'T THAT RANDALL,
THE BOY YOU THINK IS SOOOO CUTE?
291
00:16:01,561 --> 00:16:04,201
- MOM, KEEP YOUR VOICE DOWN.
- HEY, RANDALL,
292
00:16:04,231 --> 00:16:05,471
THIS IS MY DAUGHTER IVY.
293
00:16:05,498 --> 00:16:09,368
SHE'S SINGLE AND LOVES
TO MINGLE.
294
00:16:09,402 --> 00:16:11,742
MARY LOU!
295
00:16:11,771 --> 00:16:14,441
YOU'RE SO CUTE.
RANDALL CAN'T HEAR YOU.
296
00:16:14,474 --> 00:16:19,414
HEY, EVERYBODY!
I'M AMY DUNCAN,
TEDDY DUNCAN'S MOM.
297
00:16:19,446 --> 00:16:23,416
AND I'M MARY LOU WENTZ
AND THIS IS MY DAUGHTER IVY.
298
00:16:23,450 --> 00:16:26,550
WE'RE THE COOL MOMS.
RIGHT, TEDDY?
299
00:16:26,586 --> 00:16:30,356
- HIT IT, MARY LOU.
- ( dance music playing )
300
00:16:41,401 --> 00:16:43,801
- I CAN'T LOOK.
- OH, GOOD CHOICE.
301
00:16:43,836 --> 00:16:47,406
BECAUSE RIGHT NOW THEY'RE
DOING THE USHER BUMP.
302
00:17:01,388 --> 00:17:05,328
OKAY, YOU DID NOT SAY
A WORD THE ENTIRE RIDE HOME.
303
00:17:05,358 --> 00:17:07,458
OUT WITH IT.
304
00:17:09,362 --> 00:17:11,202
YOU TOTALLY
EMBARRASSED ME TONIGHT.
305
00:17:11,231 --> 00:17:13,601
YEAH, THAT WAS
KIND OF THE IDEA.
306
00:17:14,601 --> 00:17:18,271
LOOK AT ME.
307
00:17:18,305 --> 00:17:20,505
WHY?
WHAT DID I EVER
DO TO YOU?
308
00:17:20,540 --> 00:17:22,580
SHH.
309
00:17:22,609 --> 00:17:26,079
YOU PLAYED ME, TEDDY.
YOU DON'T THINK I'M COOL AT ALL.
310
00:17:26,113 --> 00:17:27,483
WHY-- WHY WOULD YOU
THINK THAT?
311
00:17:27,514 --> 00:17:29,484
( chuckles )
BECAUSE I HEARD YOU SAY IT.
312
00:17:29,516 --> 00:17:32,386
- WHEN YOU BUTT-DIALED ME.
- I--
313
00:17:33,486 --> 00:17:35,456
OHHH.
314
00:17:37,557 --> 00:17:40,157
YEAH, "OHHH."
315
00:17:46,666 --> 00:17:48,566
I DON'T KNOW
WHAT TO SAY, MOM.
316
00:17:51,404 --> 00:17:53,414
I'M SORRY.
317
00:17:55,142 --> 00:17:57,382
THAT'S A START.
318
00:17:57,410 --> 00:18:00,550
I SHOULD HAVE
NEVER DONE THAT.
I FEEL AWFUL.
319
00:18:00,580 --> 00:18:02,580
NOW I'M FEELING BETTER.
320
00:18:05,652 --> 00:18:08,562
WELL, DO ME A FAVOR.
IN THE FUTURE
321
00:18:08,588 --> 00:18:10,418
WHEN I DO SOMETHING STUPID,
322
00:18:10,457 --> 00:18:13,287
COULD YOU JUST GROUND ME
LIKE A NORMAL MOM?
323
00:18:13,326 --> 00:18:15,556
OH, TEDDY.
324
00:18:17,497 --> 00:18:21,097
I THINK WE'VE ESTABLISHED
I'LL NEVER BE A NORMAL MOM.
325
00:18:30,477 --> 00:18:32,507
( chatting )
326
00:18:34,347 --> 00:18:36,447
- OH.
- ( screams )
327
00:18:38,651 --> 00:18:43,291
VAN BRUNDT.
HEY, WHAT'S UP?
328
00:18:43,323 --> 00:18:46,393
- GOT A NEW PHONE.
- OH, RIGHT, HOW MUCH
DO I OWE YOU?
329
00:18:46,426 --> 00:18:49,556
DO YOU KNOW WHEN YOU GET
A NEW PHONE YOU CAN CHECK
YOUR OLD MESSAGES?
330
00:18:51,598 --> 00:18:53,898
WELL, THAT DOESN'T
SOUND RIGHT.
331
00:18:53,933 --> 00:18:57,243
I HEARD WHAT YOU SAID ABOUT ME.
ALL OF IT!
332
00:18:59,439 --> 00:19:02,339
- OKAY, WHAT ARE YOU
GOING TO DO TO US?
- I'M GOING TO LET YOU CHOOSE.
333
00:19:02,375 --> 00:19:04,505
- I MADE A LIST.
- WOW.
334
00:19:04,544 --> 00:19:07,314
YOU'RE PRETTY ORGANIZED
FOR A BULLY.
335
00:19:10,250 --> 00:19:14,650
I DON'T MEAN TO CORRECT YOU,
BUT THERE'S NO "J" IN GOUGE.
336
00:19:17,324 --> 00:19:20,964
LET'S GO WITH NUMBER FIVE.
AT LEAST IT'S NOT PAINFUL.
337
00:19:20,993 --> 00:19:23,233
- TWO NUMBER FIVES, PLEASE.
- THANK YOU.
338
00:19:25,598 --> 00:19:27,728
( grunting )
339
00:19:35,608 --> 00:19:37,638
WE BUTT-DIALED
VAN BRUNDT.
340
00:19:39,579 --> 00:19:42,349
I DIDN'T SAY STOP.
341
00:19:48,388 --> 00:19:51,758
OKAY, WHIRLYBIRD,
THIS IS YOUR FINAL MISSION.
342
00:19:51,791 --> 00:19:55,431
TAKE HAPPY HAPPY HORSE
FAR FAR AWAY.
343
00:19:58,698 --> 00:20:02,268
LAUNCH-- THREE, TWO, ONE.
344
00:20:08,675 --> 00:20:10,535
YEAH, IT'S GOING GOOD.
345
00:20:10,577 --> 00:20:12,647
NO NO.
NO, WHIRLYBIRD.
346
00:20:12,679 --> 00:20:14,709
LOOK OUT FOR
THE POWER LINE, NO!
347
00:20:21,654 --> 00:20:23,494
* I'm a happy happy horse
348
00:20:23,523 --> 00:20:25,293
* Happy happy
happy horse *
349
00:20:25,325 --> 00:20:26,625
* I'm a happy happy horse
350
00:20:26,659 --> 00:20:28,699
* Happy happy
happy horse *
351
00:20:28,728 --> 00:20:30,658
- ( whinnies )
- ( sobs )
352
00:20:30,697 --> 00:20:32,627
- * I'm a happy
happy horse... *
- ( crying )
353
00:20:32,665 --> 00:20:34,425
* Happy happy happy horse
354
00:20:34,467 --> 00:20:36,497
* I'm a happy
happy horse *
355
00:20:36,536 --> 00:20:38,566
* Happy happy happy horse.
356
00:20:41,574 --> 00:20:44,284
Hey, Charlie, so, um...
357
00:20:44,311 --> 00:20:46,281
I have a little
advice for you.
358
00:20:46,313 --> 00:20:48,283
If you ever want
to fool a parent,
359
00:20:48,315 --> 00:20:51,275
and make them think
they're cool, Dad is
definitely the way to go.
360
00:20:51,318 --> 00:20:54,018
Just ask him about his job
and pretend you're interested.
361
00:20:54,053 --> 00:20:56,393
Dad:
Heard that.
You're grounded.
362
00:20:56,423 --> 00:20:58,593
( growls )
Baby monitor!
363
00:20:58,625 --> 00:21:00,425
Stupid technology.
364
00:21:00,460 --> 00:21:01,760
Heard that too.
365
00:21:03,396 --> 00:21:05,296
Yeah, I can't even imagine
366
00:21:05,332 --> 00:21:08,032
what kind of gadgets
they'll have when you're
a teenager,
367
00:21:08,067 --> 00:21:10,437
- so--
- Good luck, Charlie.
368
00:21:12,372 --> 00:21:14,842
HEY, HONEY. HERE WE GO.
CAREFUL IT'S HOT.
369
00:21:14,874 --> 00:21:18,814
UM, I HAD A LITTLE QUICK
QUESTION TO ASK YOU.
370
00:21:18,845 --> 00:21:22,475
- SURE, MOM, WHAT'S UP?
- OKAY, I WANT YOU JUST TO BE
TOTALLY HONEST WITH ME.
371
00:21:22,515 --> 00:21:25,345
I AM COOLER THAN
MARY LOU WENTZ, RIGHT?
372
00:21:26,686 --> 00:21:29,856
OF COURSE YOU ARE, MOM.
373
00:21:29,889 --> 00:21:33,589
NOW TELL ME THE TRUTH.
I AM COOLER THAN
AMY DUNCAN, RIGHT?
374
00:21:33,626 --> 00:21:35,726
DEFINITELY.
375
00:21:45,772 --> 00:21:48,482
( deep voice )
Psst! Hey, sweetheart.
376
00:21:48,508 --> 00:21:49,408
Yeah, I'm talking to you.
377
00:21:49,442 --> 00:21:52,782
Listen, we got a problem
with your brother.
378
00:21:54,547 --> 00:21:56,617
Not him,
the little one
379
00:21:56,649 --> 00:21:58,689
with the big mouth.
380
00:22:00,653 --> 00:22:03,363
- YOU JUST TALKING
WITH CHARLIE?
- WHAT?
381
00:22:03,390 --> 00:22:05,660
( sighs )
NEVER MIND.
382
00:22:07,460 --> 00:22:10,860
Anyway, that little stinker
was trying to get rid of me.
383
00:22:10,897 --> 00:22:13,527
I say we
get rid of him.
384
00:22:13,566 --> 00:22:15,096
'Cause that would make me--
385
00:22:15,134 --> 00:22:16,604
* A happy happy horse
386
00:22:16,636 --> 00:22:17,896
* Happy happy
happy horse. *
387
00:22:21,674 --> 00:22:24,614
STUPID HORSE.
388
00:22:24,644 --> 00:22:26,614
Watch your back, kid.
389
00:22:31,584 --> 00:22:32,894
* I'm a happy happy horse
390
00:22:32,919 --> 00:22:34,819
* Happy happy
happy horse. *
28785
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