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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 3 00:00:16,784 --> 00:00:20,654 * 4 00:00:32,766 --> 00:00:34,602 * Well, John's the lead in this movie scene * 5 00:00:34,602 --> 00:00:37,138 * He's the Candy Man, if ya know what I mean * 6 00:00:37,138 --> 00:00:39,140 * And he drives a long black limousine * 7 00:00:39,140 --> 00:00:41,309 * With his sidekick Chick 8 00:00:41,309 --> 00:00:43,277 * Now, John's a drummer out on the street * 9 00:00:43,277 --> 00:00:45,346 * But the man can't even keep a beat * 10 00:00:45,346 --> 00:00:47,481 * So he spins his wheels to make ends meet * 11 00:00:47,481 --> 00:00:49,850 * Huh? * You got it? Stay with me, now * 12 00:00:49,850 --> 00:00:51,519 * John's got a pretty little fiance * 13 00:00:51,519 --> 00:00:53,587 * But her daddy's tryin' to pull a power play * 14 00:00:53,587 --> 00:00:55,789 * And if Big Daddy gets his way * 15 00:00:55,789 --> 00:00:59,227 * Our man John will be wearin' cement shoes! * 16 00:01:01,529 --> 00:01:03,597 * I'm confused 17 00:01:05,466 --> 00:01:07,301 * We're goin' berserk * 18 00:01:07,301 --> 00:01:09,870 * You gotta be crazy to live the way we do * 19 00:01:09,870 --> 00:01:12,573 * Goin' berserk Everything's hazy * 20 00:01:12,573 --> 00:01:15,276 * And only your sweet love will see me through * 21 00:01:15,276 --> 00:01:16,610 * Everybody's goin' berserk * 22 00:01:16,610 --> 00:01:18,879 * Goin' berserk, goin' berserk * 23 00:01:18,879 --> 00:01:21,149 * But now, Salvatore is a movie man * 24 00:01:21,149 --> 00:01:23,184 * And he wants to put the wedding in the can * 25 00:01:23,184 --> 00:01:25,319 * If he can, that's the rub * 26 00:01:25,319 --> 00:01:27,621 * But Nancy's daddy's got a different plan * 27 00:01:27,621 --> 00:01:29,490 * What? * Hold tight 28 00:01:29,490 --> 00:01:34,362 * Cut to... * ( Heavenly choir sings) 29 00:01:34,362 --> 00:01:36,530 * You see, Sun Yi, he's a holy man * 30 00:01:36,530 --> 00:01:38,499 * But it's all a front for his master plan * 31 00:01:38,499 --> 00:01:40,534 * Ya understand? * Huh?À* 32 00:01:40,534 --> 00:01:42,836 * Now, Sun Yi runs an aerobics class * 33 00:01:42,836 --> 00:01:44,905 * And he runs it pretty slick 34 00:01:44,905 --> 00:01:47,175 * It'll trim your thighs, it'll pop your eyes * 35 00:01:47,175 --> 00:01:49,243 * Jane Fonda's worried sick 36 00:01:49,243 --> 00:01:51,312 * So the Holy One slips John a gun * 37 00:01:51,312 --> 00:01:53,514 * And he says he wants Ed Reese undone * 38 00:01:53,514 --> 00:01:55,416 * 'Cause Ed's a drag, he's just dead wood * 39 00:01:55,416 --> 00:01:56,850 * Get it? * Got it! * Good! 40 00:01:56,850 --> 00:01:58,319 * Goin' berserk 41 00:01:58,319 --> 00:02:01,189 * You gotta be crazy to live the way we do * 42 00:02:01,189 --> 00:02:02,423 * Goin' berserk 43 00:02:02,423 --> 00:02:04,158 * Everything's hazy 44 00:02:04,158 --> 00:02:06,227 * And only your sweet love will see me through * 45 00:02:13,634 --> 00:02:15,336 * Goin' berserk 46 00:02:15,336 --> 00:02:18,172 * I'm a-startin' to go b-b-b-b-b-berserk! * 47 00:02:18,172 --> 00:02:19,573 * Goin' berserk 48 00:02:19,573 --> 00:02:22,243 * I don't know what I want, but I need it! * 49 00:02:22,243 --> 00:02:23,611 * Goin' berserk 50 00:02:23,611 --> 00:02:25,479 * Why don't you help me out a little bit? * 51 00:02:25,479 --> 00:02:27,415 * You know what I like * Goin' berserk... 52 00:02:36,890 --> 00:02:40,594 ( Animals screeching in distance ) 53 00:02:40,594 --> 00:02:43,297 ( Jungle drums beating ) 54 00:03:11,559 --> 00:03:14,295 I know, I know. We're almost there. 55 00:03:32,313 --> 00:03:33,647 ( Footsteps approach ) 56 00:03:35,416 --> 00:03:37,651 Hi. Hi. Okay, let's start-- 57 00:03:37,651 --> 00:03:39,653 Oh, cut that out. Will ya stop that? 58 00:03:39,653 --> 00:03:42,356 C'mon, a joke is a joke. Will ya cut it out? 59 00:03:43,524 --> 00:03:45,959 Awright, smoke 'em if ya got 'em. 60 00:03:45,959 --> 00:03:48,496 Awright, lighten up and listen to me, now. 61 00:03:48,496 --> 00:03:49,763 Awright. 62 00:03:49,763 --> 00:03:51,999 I guess you're wondering how I got here. 63 00:03:51,999 --> 00:03:54,335 Well, let me first introduce myself. 64 00:03:54,335 --> 00:03:56,704 My name is John Bourgignon of the Melonville Bourgignons, 65 00:03:56,704 --> 00:03:58,572 and a good friend of mine, Chick Leff, and I 66 00:03:58,572 --> 00:04:00,708 ran a limousine service back in the States. 67 00:04:00,708 --> 00:04:03,277 I was about to get married to this girl Nancy Reese-- 68 00:04:03,277 --> 00:04:04,778 Well, see for yourself. 69 00:04:04,778 --> 00:04:06,714 You're not gonna believe this story. 70 00:04:06,714 --> 00:04:08,682 You might believe it, I don't know. You-- 71 00:04:08,682 --> 00:04:10,618 You might buy it, you might not. Check it out. 72 00:04:15,456 --> 00:04:18,426 I just gotta stop off at Sal's for a second. 73 00:04:18,426 --> 00:04:20,027 Aw, no, I don't wanna go there. 74 00:04:20,027 --> 00:04:20,961 He's gonna talk us into acting 75 00:04:20,961 --> 00:04:22,830 in another one of his Kung Fu movies again. 76 00:04:22,830 --> 00:04:24,665 Oh, that was embarrassing. 77 00:04:24,665 --> 00:04:26,500 What do you think he wants? I dunno. 78 00:04:26,500 --> 00:04:28,702 The only time he calls is when we're late on the loan payments, 79 00:04:28,702 --> 00:04:30,404 and we're not late. 80 00:04:30,404 --> 00:04:32,306 How's he make any money on look-alike service? 81 00:04:32,306 --> 00:04:34,475 He don't. We're here to see Mr. DiPasquale. 82 00:04:34,475 --> 00:04:35,709 I think his mother is on the phone. 83 00:04:35,709 --> 00:04:36,710 May I say who's calling? 84 00:04:36,710 --> 00:04:38,312 Tell him John and Chick are here. 85 00:04:38,312 --> 00:04:39,513 I'll see if he's free. Thank you. 86 00:04:42,716 --> 00:04:44,485 MAN: Aw, fuck you! 87 00:04:44,485 --> 00:04:46,320 Yeah? Well, fuck you! 88 00:04:46,320 --> 00:04:48,689 He's on a conference call. 89 00:04:48,689 --> 00:04:50,724 If you'd care to take a seat, he'll be with you momentarily. 90 00:04:50,724 --> 00:04:52,493 Great. Thanks a lot. Thank you. 91 00:05:02,736 --> 00:05:06,106 Hey! Chick, Johnny! I been waitin' for ya! 92 00:05:06,106 --> 00:05:07,608 C'mon inside, 93 00:05:07,608 --> 00:05:09,042 I didn't know you guys were here. 94 00:05:09,042 --> 00:05:11,612 * Here comes the bride, here comes the bride * 95 00:05:11,612 --> 00:05:13,381 I got an important meeting inside. 96 00:05:13,381 --> 00:05:15,349 No phone calls, no interruptions. 97 00:05:15,349 --> 00:05:16,450 I don't wanna be disturbed. 98 00:05:16,450 --> 00:05:17,851 What if you get a phone call? 99 00:05:17,851 --> 00:05:19,753 No phone calls. 100 00:05:19,753 --> 00:05:22,656 I got an important meeting inside. No interruptions! 101 00:05:22,656 --> 00:05:23,857 No nothing! 102 00:05:23,857 --> 00:05:25,526 Yes, Mr. Dispes-- 103 00:05:25,526 --> 00:05:27,661 DiPasquale! DiPasquale! 104 00:05:31,098 --> 00:05:32,633 Make yourself at home. 105 00:05:32,633 --> 00:05:34,768 Is this a real Oscar, Sal? 106 00:05:34,768 --> 00:05:36,537 You bet your fat ass it is, Johnny. 107 00:05:36,537 --> 00:05:38,672 It's the real thing. 108 00:05:38,672 --> 00:05:42,676 Best Foreign Film 1958. My Big Hill. 109 00:05:42,676 --> 00:05:44,645 Uh, somebody gave me that. 110 00:05:44,645 --> 00:05:46,380 One of these days I'm gonna have my own. 111 00:05:46,380 --> 00:05:47,848 I been thinkin' about gettin' back in the movies, ya know. 112 00:05:47,848 --> 00:05:50,083 Yeah. Sit down. Thanks. 113 00:05:51,385 --> 00:05:53,521 So, so, so-- 114 00:05:53,521 --> 00:05:55,456 a lot's been happening since I seen you last. 115 00:05:55,456 --> 00:05:57,391 Been readin' about you in the paper and everything. 116 00:05:57,391 --> 00:05:59,427 I mean, you're marryin' Ed Reese's daughter, 117 00:05:59,427 --> 00:06:00,661 that's a very big thing. 118 00:06:00,661 --> 00:06:02,095 I guess so, yeah. 119 00:06:02,095 --> 00:06:03,564 So, uh, how'd you swing that? 120 00:06:03,564 --> 00:06:06,166 Well, we met, and, uh, we liked each other, 121 00:06:06,166 --> 00:06:08,402 we fell in love, and we're gonna get married. 122 00:06:08,402 --> 00:06:10,504 That's very warm. I mean, I like the-- 123 00:06:10,504 --> 00:06:12,573 The love thing is very important because, 124 00:06:12,573 --> 00:06:14,508 y'know, my own marriage didn't work out too good, 125 00:06:14,508 --> 00:06:15,876 but I don't wanna get into that now. 126 00:06:15,876 --> 00:06:17,845 Sal, show him the picture. 127 00:06:17,845 --> 00:06:19,547 Nah, he don't wanna see the picture. 128 00:06:19,547 --> 00:06:20,581 C'mon, show him the picture. 129 00:06:20,581 --> 00:06:21,882 He don't wanna-- 130 00:06:21,882 --> 00:06:23,684 Well, I carry a picture of the ex on me. 131 00:06:23,684 --> 00:06:25,553 Y'know, just for old times' sake. 132 00:06:25,553 --> 00:06:28,922 She was a sweet kid. She was 18 when I married her. 133 00:06:28,922 --> 00:06:29,890 Where'd you meet her, in high school? 134 00:06:29,890 --> 00:06:32,125 No. I wish I we to high school. 135 00:06:32,125 --> 00:06:33,561 Look at this. 136 00:06:33,561 --> 00:06:35,596 Nice. Took a good picture, huh? 137 00:06:35,596 --> 00:06:36,564 Yeah. Yeah. 138 00:06:36,564 --> 00:06:38,899 Well... 139 00:06:38,899 --> 00:06:41,702 the whole thing turned to rat shit after the honeymoon. 140 00:06:41,702 --> 00:06:44,472 Look, Sal, why'd you call us here? 141 00:06:44,472 --> 00:06:45,806 Wouldn't it be interesting 142 00:06:45,806 --> 00:06:48,509 if you talked Ed Reese into letting me 143 00:06:48,509 --> 00:06:50,578 film the entire wedding? 144 00:06:50,578 --> 00:06:52,780 No, I'm sorry. It just wouldn't work. 145 00:06:52,780 --> 00:06:54,515 You don't think I'm good enough? 146 00:06:54,515 --> 00:06:55,749 I didn't say that. 147 00:06:55,749 --> 00:06:56,984 Maybe you didn't see a little film 148 00:06:56,984 --> 00:06:58,719 I like to call Kung Fu U. 149 00:06:58,719 --> 00:07:00,454 What? 150 00:07:00,454 --> 00:07:01,755 Maybe you don't remember 151 00:07:01,755 --> 00:07:03,857 a little Salvator DiPasquale production 152 00:07:03,857 --> 00:07:06,594 which just happened to gross $410,000 153 00:07:06,594 --> 00:07:09,196 across this entire country playing drive-ins. 154 00:07:09,196 --> 00:07:11,732 I guess you don't remember that, huh?! 155 00:07:11,732 --> 00:07:14,468 And I put ya in the damn movie! 156 00:07:14,468 --> 00:07:16,236 Sorry, Johnny, 157 00:07:16,236 --> 00:07:18,238 I got a bark that's worse than my bite. 158 00:07:18,238 --> 00:07:20,708 I gotta do something about this temper. 159 00:07:20,708 --> 00:07:22,576 Well, I-I'm sorry I didn't know that. 160 00:07:22,576 --> 00:07:24,678 No, that's all right, I'm sorry. I'm very sorry. 161 00:07:24,678 --> 00:07:26,647 I just think it's-- 162 00:07:26,647 --> 00:07:27,948 He just won't go along with it, that's all. 163 00:07:27,948 --> 00:07:30,183 Hey, you wanna know what I think? 164 00:07:30,183 --> 00:07:32,920 I think it would be good for his image. 165 00:07:32,920 --> 00:07:34,755 I really feel it'd be wrong. 166 00:07:34,755 --> 00:07:35,989 I mean, he doesn't like me. 167 00:07:35,989 --> 00:07:37,691 Telephone, Mr. Dispascous. 168 00:07:37,691 --> 00:07:39,660 Moron!!! 169 00:07:39,660 --> 00:07:41,895 Moron!!! 170 00:07:43,764 --> 00:07:44,732 Hey, let me ask you boys somethin'. 171 00:07:48,201 --> 00:07:51,004 How much money do you still owe on the limo? 172 00:07:51,004 --> 00:07:53,607 I don't know, about... 173 00:07:53,607 --> 00:07:55,909 a little over 10,000, I think. 174 00:07:55,909 --> 00:07:58,712 12,300. It's a lot of money. It's a lot of fares. 175 00:07:58,712 --> 00:08:00,648 It's a lot of work. 176 00:08:00,648 --> 00:08:02,950 Y'know, I'd be willing to kiss that money off 177 00:08:02,950 --> 00:08:04,852 if you could swing a deal with Reese. 178 00:08:06,053 --> 00:08:07,788 Oh, no. No, no, no. 179 00:08:07,788 --> 00:08:09,222 It's real important to me, Johnny. 180 00:08:09,222 --> 00:08:11,592 You do this for me, I do this for you. 181 00:08:11,592 --> 00:08:13,226 You scratch my back, I'm scratchin'-- 182 00:08:13,226 --> 00:08:14,895 Sal, it's impossible. Thanks very much. 183 00:08:14,895 --> 00:08:16,496 Just think about it, that's all. We gotta go to work. 184 00:08:17,831 --> 00:08:19,967 John, it's a lot of money. 185 00:08:19,967 --> 00:08:21,735 I know it is. And I'm thinkin' about it. 186 00:08:21,735 --> 00:08:23,303 Good. 187 00:08:23,303 --> 00:08:24,104 Awright, I'll tell you what I'll do. 188 00:08:24,104 --> 00:08:26,039 I'll ask Nancy to ask the old man. 189 00:08:26,039 --> 00:08:27,675 But I'm not promisin' anything. 190 00:08:27,675 --> 00:08:28,776 Great. That's all I ask. 191 00:08:28,776 --> 00:08:29,943 Now, do me a favor, would ya? 192 00:08:29,943 --> 00:08:31,278 I'm not coverin' for you tonight. 193 00:08:31,278 --> 00:08:33,547 I'm sorry. I cannot work late. 194 00:08:33,547 --> 00:08:35,583 We've got that big brunch tomorrow at Nancy's folks', 195 00:08:35,583 --> 00:08:37,084 and I wanna be perky and charming. 196 00:08:37,084 --> 00:08:39,286 Easy fare, they're classical musicians. 197 00:08:39,286 --> 00:08:40,954 Just take 'em to their hotel, it'll only take a minute. 198 00:08:40,954 --> 00:08:43,256 No. No is no. 199 00:08:49,630 --> 00:08:51,799 WOMAN: We're live outside the courthouse 200 00:08:51,799 --> 00:08:52,866 where religious cult leader 201 00:08:52,866 --> 00:08:55,969 Sun Yi Day has just been indicted on several counts. 202 00:08:55,969 --> 00:08:59,339 Included are conspiracy, tax evasion, kidnapping, 203 00:08:59,339 --> 00:09:01,842 resisting arrest and jury tampering. 204 00:09:01,842 --> 00:09:04,678 Congressman Ed Reese, the presidential hopeful 205 00:09:04,678 --> 00:09:06,046 who's leading the crusade against these people 206 00:09:06,046 --> 00:09:07,881 will be joining us shortly-- 207 00:09:07,881 --> 00:09:09,983 Hi, Shirley. Ah, Congressman. 208 00:09:09,983 --> 00:09:13,754 Shirley, what everyone must understand about this 209 00:09:13,754 --> 00:09:16,590 is that it is not religious persecution. 210 00:09:16,590 --> 00:09:20,093 The Church of Sun Yi is not a church at all. 211 00:09:20,093 --> 00:09:22,596 It's a front, it's a tax shelter, 212 00:09:22,596 --> 00:09:25,365 set up solely for personal financial gain. 213 00:09:25,365 --> 00:09:27,868 How do you see the situation? There are-- 214 00:09:27,868 --> 00:09:30,037 Excuse me. Reverend Sun Yi, could we get a statement? 215 00:09:30,037 --> 00:09:31,972 The Reverend Sun Yi has no statements at this-- 216 00:09:31,972 --> 00:09:34,908 I'd like to say that this is a very old story. 217 00:09:34,908 --> 00:09:36,677 If you don't understand something, 218 00:09:36,677 --> 00:09:38,145 then you attack it. 219 00:09:38,145 --> 00:09:40,013 You call it weird, or a cult. 220 00:09:40,013 --> 00:09:42,082 And you try to destroy it. 221 00:09:42,082 --> 00:09:44,017 Well, the person who is leading the attack 222 00:09:44,017 --> 00:09:46,987 is usually someone who is on very shaky moral ground himself. 223 00:09:46,987 --> 00:09:49,022 He's unsure of himself, 224 00:09:49,022 --> 00:09:51,391 and so he lashes out in a paranoid way 225 00:09:51,391 --> 00:09:52,893 against those of us 226 00:09:52,893 --> 00:09:54,762 who have ascended to a higher plane 227 00:09:54,762 --> 00:09:57,130 of consciousness and awareness. 228 00:09:57,130 --> 00:10:00,367 Well, we'll survive this, we always have in the past. 229 00:10:00,367 --> 00:10:03,804 And when Mr. Reese loses his anger and his fear, 230 00:10:03,804 --> 00:10:05,372 we invite him to join us 231 00:10:05,372 --> 00:10:08,041 in spreading our message of love and profit. 232 00:10:08,041 --> 00:10:09,777 Thank you very much. 233 00:10:09,777 --> 00:10:11,178 ( Chuckles ) 234 00:10:11,178 --> 00:10:12,913 Shirley, 235 00:10:12,913 --> 00:10:14,915 this is pure crap. 236 00:10:14,915 --> 00:10:16,183 Can we quote you, Congressman? 237 00:10:16,183 --> 00:10:18,051 Shirley, you may quote this: 238 00:10:18,051 --> 00:10:20,120 I am going to get him. 239 00:10:22,923 --> 00:10:25,826 JOHN: A Spanish version of The Beatles-- wonderful. 240 00:10:25,826 --> 00:10:27,961 ( Laughter ) 241 00:10:30,030 --> 00:10:31,364 Une momento. 242 00:10:32,800 --> 00:10:33,967 Las Beatles. 243 00:10:34,935 --> 00:10:36,770 Ringo. Really. 244 00:10:36,770 --> 00:10:38,739 Pablo. How ya doin'? 245 00:10:38,739 --> 00:10:39,940 Hi. Hi. 246 00:10:39,940 --> 00:10:41,675 Juan. Juan. 247 00:10:41,675 --> 00:10:43,043 How are ya? 248 00:10:43,043 --> 00:10:45,178 Jorge. Jorge. 249 00:10:45,178 --> 00:10:46,780 Ha ha ha ha! 250 00:10:46,780 --> 00:10:48,682 Oh... 251 00:10:48,682 --> 00:10:50,417 and I'm Mick Jagger. 252 00:10:53,887 --> 00:10:55,989 Quieres tequila? Nah. 253 00:11:05,899 --> 00:11:07,400 ( Woman laughing ) 254 00:11:09,236 --> 00:11:11,772 JOHN: Not while I'm driving, thanks. 255 00:11:11,772 --> 00:11:13,707 ( Chuckling ) 256 00:11:13,707 --> 00:11:15,709 Good shit. 257 00:11:15,709 --> 00:11:17,410 No. Thank you very much. 258 00:11:21,414 --> 00:11:23,984 ( Hooting and hollering ) 259 00:11:27,988 --> 00:11:29,757 Ohh... 260 00:11:29,757 --> 00:11:31,191 Ohh... 261 00:11:33,794 --> 00:11:35,128 Oh, thank you, God. 262 00:11:35,128 --> 00:11:37,898 Oh, thank you, God. 263 00:11:37,898 --> 00:11:40,133 I owe Ya. 264 00:11:40,133 --> 00:11:43,771 You gave me a whole hour to sleep. 265 00:11:45,272 --> 00:11:48,441 Ohh! That's all I need, I just need an hour. 266 00:11:50,744 --> 00:11:52,245 ( Birds singing ) 267 00:12:01,021 --> 00:12:02,222 Aaah! 268 00:12:03,824 --> 00:12:05,793 ( Chuckling ) 269 00:12:05,793 --> 00:12:07,160 Sorry. 270 00:12:08,528 --> 00:12:10,063 You're fat. 271 00:12:12,032 --> 00:12:14,868 My husband was fat. 272 00:12:14,868 --> 00:12:16,970 He's dead now. 273 00:12:16,970 --> 00:12:18,205 Ah. 274 00:12:22,009 --> 00:12:24,544 You must eat like a pig. 275 00:12:24,544 --> 00:12:27,080 ( Chuckles ) 276 00:12:28,315 --> 00:12:30,117 Pig... 277 00:12:33,787 --> 00:12:35,823 Yeah, yeah... 278 00:12:37,190 --> 00:12:39,927 Cigarettes'll kill ya. 279 00:12:39,927 --> 00:12:41,194 Um-hmm. 280 00:12:41,194 --> 00:12:43,296 My husband smoked, y'know. 281 00:12:43,296 --> 00:12:46,800 He died from smoking too much. 282 00:12:46,800 --> 00:12:49,236 I thought you said he died 'cause he was fat. 283 00:12:50,303 --> 00:12:53,874 He was fat with bad lungs. 284 00:12:53,874 --> 00:12:55,108 WOMAN: Granny? 285 00:12:55,108 --> 00:12:58,011 Granny! Oh, hi! 286 00:12:58,011 --> 00:13:01,048 Oh, it's so good to see you! 287 00:13:01,048 --> 00:13:02,883 My little girl! 288 00:13:02,883 --> 00:13:04,952 I see you've met John. 289 00:13:04,952 --> 00:13:08,088 No, I don't believe I have. 290 00:13:08,088 --> 00:13:10,523 Oh, Granny, this is my fianc, 291 00:13:10,523 --> 00:13:12,092 John Bourgignon. 292 00:13:12,092 --> 00:13:14,027 Oh! How do you do? 293 00:13:14,027 --> 00:13:18,331 Oh, what a handsome young man! 294 00:13:18,331 --> 00:13:22,202 I hope you will both be as happy 295 00:13:22,202 --> 00:13:25,873 as your grandfather and I were. 296 00:13:39,953 --> 00:13:42,089 John! 297 00:13:42,089 --> 00:13:43,356 Aaah! 298 00:13:43,356 --> 00:13:45,859 Are you okay? I'm--I'm sorry. 299 00:13:45,859 --> 00:13:48,028 I'm very sorry, Mrs. Reese, very sorry. 300 00:13:48,028 --> 00:13:49,096 That's all right. 301 00:13:49,096 --> 00:13:52,132 He's just been real tired recently. 302 00:13:52,132 --> 00:13:55,002 He's been working so hard. He's just exhausted. 303 00:13:55,002 --> 00:13:57,137 Where's Dad? 304 00:13:57,137 --> 00:13:59,272 He's still on the phone, talking to Washington. 305 00:13:59,272 --> 00:14:02,142 You know how it is in Washington. 306 00:14:02,142 --> 00:14:04,912 I'm sorry I'm late, everyone. 307 00:14:04,912 --> 00:14:06,646 I always say you can call me anything, 308 00:14:06,646 --> 00:14:08,348 but don't call me late for dinner. 309 00:14:08,348 --> 00:14:10,150 Ha ha ha ha! 310 00:14:10,150 --> 00:14:12,585 Ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha! 311 00:14:12,585 --> 00:14:14,021 Ha ha ha! Ha--huh-huh-- 312 00:14:14,021 --> 00:14:15,956 Yeah. 313 00:14:15,956 --> 00:14:18,058 Mother, it's good to see you! 314 00:14:18,058 --> 00:14:19,226 You're looking wonderful as ever. 315 00:14:19,226 --> 00:14:20,593 Hi, honey. 316 00:14:20,593 --> 00:14:22,896 Hello, baby. Hello, Daddy.À 317 00:14:22,896 --> 00:14:24,597 Hello, Mr. Reese. 318 00:14:25,665 --> 00:14:27,667 Yeah. 319 00:14:27,667 --> 00:14:31,271 Daddy, John and Chick's business is really improving now. 320 00:14:31,271 --> 00:14:34,174 You think that's gonna make you enough money 321 00:14:34,174 --> 00:14:36,176 to support my daughter, driving a limousine? 322 00:14:36,176 --> 00:14:38,145 Yes, sir, I do. 323 00:14:38,145 --> 00:14:40,313 That and I also supplement my income 324 00:14:40,313 --> 00:14:42,349 by drumming part-time. 325 00:14:42,349 --> 00:14:44,651 As a matter of fact, I'll be performing tonight. 326 00:14:44,651 --> 00:14:47,254 Wonderful. You hang out in nightclubs. 327 00:14:47,254 --> 00:14:48,922 No, sir. It's not really a nightclub. 328 00:14:48,922 --> 00:14:51,091 How much money do you make a year? 329 00:14:51,091 --> 00:14:53,193 Wouldn't you rather talk about this in private? 330 00:14:53,193 --> 00:14:54,995 No. ( Buzzer ) 331 00:14:54,995 --> 00:14:57,931 I'll get it. Who could be at the back door? 332 00:14:57,931 --> 00:15:00,033 That'd be probably my best man, Chick 333 00:15:00,033 --> 00:15:01,301 and his date. 334 00:15:01,301 --> 00:15:03,336 I invited him, Daddy. 335 00:15:03,336 --> 00:15:06,239 I was saying, how much money do you make in a year? 336 00:15:06,239 --> 00:15:09,709 Oh, in a year... 337 00:15:09,709 --> 00:15:13,313 I would say anywhere from 30 to, um... 338 00:15:13,313 --> 00:15:15,715 11,000 a year, sir. 339 00:15:15,715 --> 00:15:17,250 But I invest very heavily in stocks. 340 00:15:17,250 --> 00:15:19,086 Stocks. Oh, yes. 341 00:15:19,086 --> 00:15:20,453 Who's your investor? 342 00:15:20,453 --> 00:15:23,123 It's, um... you wouldn't know him. 343 00:15:23,123 --> 00:15:25,325 Really? No. 344 00:15:25,325 --> 00:15:28,328 What's that name? I know a lot of small firms. 345 00:15:28,328 --> 00:15:31,198 Oh, they're just, they're new, almost. 346 00:15:31,198 --> 00:15:35,235 And, uh, they go by the name of, uh... 347 00:15:35,235 --> 00:15:39,739 of, uh, Smith and Barney and there's Andy and-- 348 00:15:39,739 --> 00:15:41,474 Aaah! 349 00:15:43,110 --> 00:15:44,211 I'm very sorry. 350 00:15:44,211 --> 00:15:46,213 You clumsy ox! 351 00:15:46,213 --> 00:15:48,315 Do you see what you did?! 352 00:15:48,315 --> 00:15:49,482 He didn't mean to break the chair. 353 00:15:49,482 --> 00:15:51,251 He's too fat! 354 00:15:51,251 --> 00:15:52,485 I'm sorry. 355 00:15:54,721 --> 00:15:56,756 I'm very sorry about the chair, sir. 356 00:15:56,756 --> 00:15:59,026 A little Crazy Glue will fix that right up. 357 00:15:59,026 --> 00:16:01,995 Here's my friend Chick Leff now and--and his date. 358 00:16:01,995 --> 00:16:03,430 Hi, everybody. Thanks for the invite. 359 00:16:03,430 --> 00:16:06,433 Oh, this is Misty. Hi. 360 00:16:06,433 --> 00:16:08,401 Oh, soup. 361 00:16:08,401 --> 00:16:11,071 Pretty fancy place here, huh? 362 00:16:11,071 --> 00:16:12,372 Yes, it looks great. 363 00:16:12,372 --> 00:16:15,075 Uh, you have a half hour left. 364 00:16:15,075 --> 00:16:17,010 It's up to you if you want to get off or not. 365 00:16:17,010 --> 00:16:18,411 Ohh! 366 00:16:18,411 --> 00:16:20,180 ( Whispers ) Cool it. 367 00:16:20,180 --> 00:16:22,549 GIRL: Do you know how ridiculous you people look? 368 00:16:22,549 --> 00:16:27,120 Oh, hello, darling. Patty's here now! 369 00:16:27,120 --> 00:16:29,322 I hate you people. I hate all of you. 370 00:16:29,322 --> 00:16:31,091 She doesn't mean this. 371 00:16:31,091 --> 00:16:33,026 But your day of reckoning will come! 372 00:16:33,026 --> 00:16:34,127 And when it does, 373 00:16:34,127 --> 00:16:35,495 I hope you get what you deserve! 374 00:16:38,331 --> 00:16:42,135 That's my daughter Patty. She's the youngest. 375 00:16:42,135 --> 00:16:45,305 Probably just a phase she's going through. 376 00:16:45,305 --> 00:16:47,440 If you like, I'll talk to her. I'm more her age. 377 00:16:47,440 --> 00:16:50,743 Jesus, I need a drink. I gotta make a martini. 378 00:16:50,743 --> 00:16:53,046 He's been under a lot of strain lately. 379 00:16:53,046 --> 00:16:54,814 That's all right, Mrs. Reese. 380 00:16:54,814 --> 00:16:57,317 Stress has been known to turn people into complete shitheads. 381 00:16:57,317 --> 00:17:00,320 Not your husband, per se, uh, but... 382 00:17:00,320 --> 00:17:03,823 ( Doorbell ) I'll get it. 383 00:17:03,823 --> 00:17:06,459 Maybe the wedding will help to... 384 00:17:06,459 --> 00:17:08,128 bring everybody closer together. 385 00:17:08,128 --> 00:17:10,063 Oh, yeah? 386 00:17:10,063 --> 00:17:12,132 Weddings are like that. 387 00:17:12,132 --> 00:17:14,467 Mrs. REESE: Misty, your pimp is here to see you. 388 00:17:14,467 --> 00:17:17,137 Uh-oh. 389 00:17:17,137 --> 00:17:20,540 WOMAN: One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. 390 00:17:20,540 --> 00:17:23,243 Come on, ladies, let's run. 391 00:17:23,243 --> 00:17:25,512 Run, run, run, run, run... 392 00:17:28,848 --> 00:17:31,218 The new recruits sure look good. 393 00:17:31,218 --> 00:17:34,354 Sun Yi showed great foresight setting us up here. 394 00:17:34,354 --> 00:17:36,489 Mind control by way of the body. 395 00:17:36,489 --> 00:17:38,591 Such empty minds, 396 00:17:38,591 --> 00:17:41,861 crying out for fulfillment. 397 00:17:41,861 --> 00:17:44,397 I'd like to fulfill that one in the red. 398 00:17:46,233 --> 00:17:49,569 LEADER: Be tough, be strong, your body is your best friend... 399 00:17:49,569 --> 00:17:52,505 I claim my divine right... 400 00:17:52,505 --> 00:17:55,508 ALL: I claim my divine right... 401 00:17:55,508 --> 00:17:57,277 ...to material stuff... 402 00:17:57,277 --> 00:18:00,147 ...to material stuff... 403 00:18:00,147 --> 00:18:02,182 ...before someone else does. 404 00:18:02,182 --> 00:18:05,185 ...before someone else does. 405 00:18:05,185 --> 00:18:08,388 My body, my mind, my money... 406 00:18:08,388 --> 00:18:12,125 ALL: Sun Yi. 407 00:18:12,125 --> 00:18:14,194 Sun... 408 00:18:14,194 --> 00:18:16,829 Okay, okay, that's enough. Let's get down to business. 409 00:18:16,829 --> 00:18:18,531 Murray, you got a cigarette? Yeah, here. 410 00:18:18,531 --> 00:18:20,233 Let me have the regional financial report. 411 00:18:20,233 --> 00:18:21,634 It's not great news. 412 00:18:21,634 --> 00:18:24,271 I told you, we're gonna have a lot of bad publicity 413 00:18:24,271 --> 00:18:25,205 from the Reese interview. 414 00:18:25,205 --> 00:18:28,375 Transmissions have been very clear on this. 415 00:18:28,375 --> 00:18:31,278 The obstacle must be removed. 416 00:18:31,278 --> 00:18:34,414 Angela, initiate Plan A. 417 00:18:34,414 --> 00:18:36,416 Yes, Your Holiness. 418 00:18:36,416 --> 00:18:37,850 Plan A. 419 00:18:41,421 --> 00:18:43,856 Get the big guy in the green limousine. 420 00:19:00,173 --> 00:19:02,242 CHICK: Hi, guys. 421 00:19:02,242 --> 00:19:04,544 Cut the small talk, you're late! 422 00:19:04,544 --> 00:19:06,446 I've been playin' pocket pool up there for 15 minutes! 423 00:19:06,446 --> 00:19:07,580 I got a grand opening today! 424 00:19:07,580 --> 00:19:09,382 Awright, awright. Where to, Sal? 425 00:19:09,382 --> 00:19:11,318 3rd and Elsmere. Mr. Hound Dog. 426 00:19:11,318 --> 00:19:12,452 The hot dog people? 427 00:19:12,452 --> 00:19:14,254 Yeah, they want the boys to walk around 428 00:19:14,254 --> 00:19:15,622 wearing sandwich boards. 429 00:19:15,622 --> 00:19:17,957 It's not a bad idea. Did you talk to Reese? 430 00:19:17,957 --> 00:19:19,926 No, sorry. I haven't had a chance. 431 00:19:19,926 --> 00:19:22,329 Would you talk to him, Johnny? This is important to me. 432 00:19:22,329 --> 00:19:23,563 Yeah, I will. 433 00:19:23,563 --> 00:19:25,465 Could you drop me off on the way? 434 00:19:25,465 --> 00:19:27,634 Yes, I would mind, actually. Would you drive?! 435 00:19:27,634 --> 00:19:28,568 Awright! 436 00:19:37,310 --> 00:19:40,713 ( Drums play disco beat ) 437 00:19:43,283 --> 00:19:46,519 * You stick by yi-yi-yi-yi * 438 00:19:46,519 --> 00:19:49,489 * By my love 439 00:19:49,489 --> 00:19:51,924 * Oh, oh, oh, oh 440 00:19:53,560 --> 00:19:55,362 * My love 441 00:19:55,362 --> 00:19:56,963 Hey, John? 442 00:19:56,963 --> 00:19:58,431 * Yeah 443 00:19:58,431 --> 00:20:00,300 What would you think 444 00:20:00,300 --> 00:20:03,303 if we put like a flat gray on the wall 445 00:20:03,303 --> 00:20:06,973 and then maybe a Chinese red lacquer trim on the molding? 446 00:20:06,973 --> 00:20:08,641 Do you think that'd be good? 447 00:20:08,641 --> 00:20:10,009 * Yeah, yeah 448 00:20:10,009 --> 00:20:11,344 * Yeah 449 00:20:11,344 --> 00:20:13,380 Yeah. I do, too. 450 00:20:13,380 --> 00:20:16,316 * Yeah, by my love 451 00:20:18,251 --> 00:20:20,387 * With my love 452 00:20:20,387 --> 00:20:23,390 * By yi-yi-yi-yi 453 00:20:23,390 --> 00:20:25,425 * By my love 454 00:20:25,425 --> 00:20:26,759 What? 455 00:20:26,759 --> 00:20:28,661 John, did you hear anything I was saying? 456 00:20:28,661 --> 00:20:31,398 No. I'm practicing. 457 00:20:31,398 --> 00:20:33,966 C'mon, Nance, I'm practicing. 458 00:20:33,966 --> 00:20:35,635 Yeah, but you've been practicing all day long. 459 00:20:35,635 --> 00:20:37,304 I know. I'm bad. 460 00:20:37,304 --> 00:20:38,471 What do you mean, you're bad? 461 00:20:38,471 --> 00:20:40,340 You're the greatest. 462 00:20:40,340 --> 00:20:42,008 You're a great drummer. 463 00:20:42,008 --> 00:20:44,377 You tell that to the guys tonight. 464 00:20:44,377 --> 00:20:46,546 I think it's amazing what you do with all these things. 465 00:20:46,546 --> 00:20:47,980 What you do with your little foot there... 466 00:20:47,980 --> 00:20:49,549 I know, it is amazing. 467 00:20:49,549 --> 00:20:51,451 What you do with these-- 468 00:20:51,451 --> 00:20:53,286 what do you call 'em, drumstick things? 469 00:20:53,286 --> 00:20:54,787 Drumstick things. That's very good. 470 00:20:54,787 --> 00:20:57,056 Why don't you show me how to use 'em? 471 00:20:57,056 --> 00:20:58,791 No, no, no. This takes years-- C'mon. 472 00:20:58,791 --> 00:21:00,560 It takes years to play this. 473 00:21:00,560 --> 00:21:01,794 Show me. 474 00:21:01,794 --> 00:21:03,563 No, I can't. I gotta get ready to go. 475 00:21:03,563 --> 00:21:05,064 Tell you what-- put 'em in your hands. 476 00:21:05,064 --> 00:21:06,699 Why don't you just sit down and play. 477 00:21:06,699 --> 00:21:08,468 Go nuts, all right? Have fun. 478 00:21:08,468 --> 00:21:10,303 I gotta get ready. 479 00:21:18,711 --> 00:21:21,748 ( Playing snappy beat ) 480 00:21:37,330 --> 00:21:38,598 Gimme those things! 481 00:21:38,598 --> 00:21:40,032 Don't ever do that again! 482 00:21:40,032 --> 00:21:41,434 Sheesh! 483 00:21:45,605 --> 00:21:48,408 ( Women talking and laughing ) 484 00:21:58,851 --> 00:22:00,687 Excuse me. I'm lookin' for a guy named Skipper. 485 00:22:00,687 --> 00:22:02,489 I'm a guy named Skipper. 486 00:22:02,489 --> 00:22:05,625 Damion, take that tablecloth off there, will ya? 487 00:22:05,625 --> 00:22:07,427 It's all bloody, it looks terrible! 488 00:22:07,427 --> 00:22:10,697 And I want baby blue spots in all those fixtures! 489 00:22:10,697 --> 00:22:13,099 Now get to it! I'm trying! 490 00:22:13,099 --> 00:22:15,868 Yes? I'm John Bourgignon from the Musician's Union. 491 00:22:15,868 --> 00:22:19,372 Well, you tell those people to take me off that Unfair List! 492 00:22:19,372 --> 00:22:21,741 It's unfair to me, I didn't do a damn thing. 493 00:22:21,741 --> 00:22:23,476 I don't know anything about that. 494 00:22:23,476 --> 00:22:24,711 I'm just a drummer. 495 00:22:24,711 --> 00:22:26,879 Oh, thank God you're here. 496 00:22:26,879 --> 00:22:30,917 Here's the costume. The dressing room is right back there. 497 00:22:30,917 --> 00:22:34,487 Damion, be a dear and get me a cup of coffee. 498 00:22:34,487 --> 00:22:35,922 I'm only one person! 499 00:22:35,922 --> 00:22:38,625 I'm sorry. I can't wear this. 500 00:22:38,625 --> 00:22:40,660 Look at the Gross National Product. 501 00:22:40,660 --> 00:22:42,662 Well, in times of inflation-- 502 00:22:42,662 --> 00:22:44,464 We've gotta go back to the Gold Standard. 503 00:22:49,636 --> 00:22:51,471 ( Lowers voice ) How ya doin'? 504 00:22:51,471 --> 00:22:53,105 Hi, how are ya? 505 00:22:53,105 --> 00:22:54,707 Yo. 506 00:22:58,778 --> 00:23:00,480 Yeah. 507 00:23:02,715 --> 00:23:04,884 ( Excited screaming ) 508 00:23:07,587 --> 00:23:09,188 I don't know about this. 509 00:23:09,188 --> 00:23:11,491 I've heard those ladies can get pretty rough. 510 00:23:11,491 --> 00:23:12,892 Come on, it's a job. 511 00:23:12,892 --> 00:23:15,595 They're women-- what can happen? 512 00:23:15,595 --> 00:23:18,565 ( Disco music plays ) 513 00:23:18,565 --> 00:23:20,933 ( Women screaming ) 514 00:23:44,591 --> 00:23:46,158 Aaaaah! 515 00:23:49,228 --> 00:23:50,830 Hey, hey, hey, hey! 516 00:24:05,645 --> 00:24:08,481 You leave her alone! 517 00:24:08,481 --> 00:24:09,949 Come on, come on! 518 00:24:16,523 --> 00:24:18,491 Will you guys help me out?! 519 00:24:21,528 --> 00:24:23,496 You big bully! You big bully! 520 00:24:25,231 --> 00:24:26,465 Oooh! 521 00:24:31,971 --> 00:24:34,574 He can't do that! 522 00:24:47,787 --> 00:24:50,523 ( Siren blares ) 523 00:25:02,669 --> 00:25:07,006 JUDGE: Since most of you gentlemen are not strangers to this court, 524 00:25:07,006 --> 00:25:10,710 you know exactly what kind of behavior I will tolerate. 525 00:25:10,710 --> 00:25:13,813 Any breach of courtroom protocol 526 00:25:13,813 --> 00:25:16,883 will receive the maximum penalty. 527 00:25:16,883 --> 00:25:18,851 Am I understood? 528 00:25:21,053 --> 00:25:23,623 Okay, let's get this over with. 529 00:25:23,623 --> 00:25:25,024 We'll start at this end. 530 00:25:25,024 --> 00:25:28,661 Approach the bench and state your case. 531 00:25:32,665 --> 00:25:35,267 ( Defendant talking ) 532 00:25:37,904 --> 00:25:39,839 What are you doing here? 533 00:25:39,839 --> 00:25:42,041 I set fire to my family. 534 00:25:44,877 --> 00:25:47,313 ( Chuckling ) 535 00:25:49,716 --> 00:25:51,984 Oh, Jesus, 536 00:25:51,984 --> 00:25:54,120 he set fire to his family. 537 00:25:54,120 --> 00:25:55,988 Oh, my God! 538 00:25:57,356 --> 00:25:58,991 How ya doin'? 539 00:25:58,991 --> 00:26:01,728 I dunno. I don't think I'm doin' too good. 540 00:26:01,728 --> 00:26:03,029 Right. Right. 541 00:26:03,029 --> 00:26:05,665 Listen, you got any 'ludes? 542 00:26:05,665 --> 00:26:06,899 What? 543 00:26:06,899 --> 00:26:08,735 'Ludes. 544 00:26:08,735 --> 00:26:10,770 Shut up. There's a cop. 545 00:26:10,770 --> 00:26:12,672 How about some reefer? 546 00:26:12,672 --> 00:26:13,906 Just relax, will ya? 547 00:26:13,906 --> 00:26:16,008 Toot. Ya got any toot? Shh! 548 00:26:17,644 --> 00:26:19,345 Listen, I'm freaked. 549 00:26:19,345 --> 00:26:20,880 I'm freakin' out, I'm not gonna make it. 550 00:26:20,880 --> 00:26:22,615 Get outta my pocket! 551 00:26:22,615 --> 00:26:24,751 We're all freakin' out here. Just relax, will ya? 552 00:26:24,751 --> 00:26:26,819 Okay. Get some control of yourself! 553 00:26:26,819 --> 00:26:27,954 Think positive. You'll be all right. 554 00:26:27,954 --> 00:26:29,021 All right. 555 00:26:29,021 --> 00:26:30,890 This guy over here, 556 00:26:30,890 --> 00:26:33,760 he just set fire to his entire family, for God's sakes! 557 00:26:33,760 --> 00:26:35,895 Just don't look at him. 558 00:26:35,895 --> 00:26:38,631 You're gonna be fine. Just relax, all right? 559 00:26:38,631 --> 00:26:40,132 Right. 560 00:26:40,132 --> 00:26:41,734 Be positive. I'm right here if you need me. 561 00:26:41,734 --> 00:26:44,370 Easy. 562 00:26:44,370 --> 00:26:46,739 Where did our public defender go? 563 00:26:46,739 --> 00:26:48,708 Right here, Your Honor. 564 00:26:48,708 --> 00:26:49,776 Oh, my God! 565 00:26:49,776 --> 00:26:51,143 Think positive. 566 00:26:51,143 --> 00:26:52,679 You don't even know the case! 567 00:26:52,679 --> 00:26:53,913 I know the law. 568 00:26:53,913 --> 00:26:56,015 Would you like to consult with your client? 569 00:26:56,015 --> 00:26:57,717 I would like a change of venue. 570 00:26:57,717 --> 00:26:59,886 Denied. Proceed. 571 00:26:59,886 --> 00:27:01,754 I request a summary dismissal. 572 00:27:01,754 --> 00:27:03,956 Can you support that motion? 573 00:27:03,956 --> 00:27:05,825 Yes, indeed I can. 574 00:27:05,825 --> 00:27:06,959 There are thousands of criminals 575 00:27:06,959 --> 00:27:09,929 roaming all over the streets just as guilty as my client. 576 00:27:09,929 --> 00:27:11,163 Why pick on him? 577 00:27:11,163 --> 00:27:12,932 What the hell are you saying?! 578 00:27:12,932 --> 00:27:14,834 Motion denied. 579 00:27:14,834 --> 00:27:17,103 Your Honor, I would very much like to have another lawyer, 580 00:27:17,103 --> 00:27:18,738 because this one is not to my satisfaction-- 581 00:27:18,738 --> 00:27:20,139 Shh. Shh. 582 00:27:20,139 --> 00:27:22,942 Your Honor, I would like you to disqualify yourself. 583 00:27:22,942 --> 00:27:24,811 On what grounds? 584 00:27:24,811 --> 00:27:26,445 On the grounds that you've got a bad attitude. 585 00:27:26,445 --> 00:27:27,747 A bad attitude?! 586 00:27:27,747 --> 00:27:30,082 Denied! Counselor-- 587 00:27:30,082 --> 00:27:33,085 Okay. May we approach the bench, please? 588 00:27:34,453 --> 00:27:36,055 Yes. 589 00:27:36,055 --> 00:27:37,724 Don't blow this. 590 00:27:37,724 --> 00:27:39,191 All right, don't worry. 591 00:27:39,191 --> 00:27:42,061 May we speak off the record here? 592 00:27:42,061 --> 00:27:44,964 The proceedings so far are real depressing. 593 00:27:44,964 --> 00:27:47,099 I wanted to ask you, do you have a toot? 594 00:27:47,099 --> 00:27:48,968 A 'lude? Reefer? Anything? What the--?! 595 00:27:48,968 --> 00:27:50,837 You are out of order! I'm out of order? 596 00:27:50,837 --> 00:27:52,404 You'r out of order! 597 00:27:52,404 --> 00:27:54,774 This whole court is out of order! 598 00:27:54,774 --> 00:27:57,109 Twenty days in the County Jail for contempt! 599 00:27:57,109 --> 00:27:59,846 This is worse than Attica! Attica, that's right! 600 00:27:59,846 --> 00:28:02,214 Attica! Attica! Attica! Attica! 601 00:28:02,214 --> 00:28:04,183 Attica! Attica! Order! Order! 602 00:28:04,183 --> 00:28:07,153 Attica! Attica! Attica! 603 00:28:07,153 --> 00:28:09,155 Order in the court! 604 00:28:18,130 --> 00:28:19,732 I mean, I'm cool. 605 00:28:21,033 --> 00:28:22,835 I mean, I'm outta here. 606 00:28:22,835 --> 00:28:24,036 Yeah. 607 00:28:24,036 --> 00:28:27,273 You see, I, Muhammed Jerome Willy, 608 00:28:27,273 --> 00:28:29,141 have a plan. 609 00:28:29,141 --> 00:28:31,143 Yeah. 610 00:28:31,143 --> 00:28:33,746 See, Muhammed ain't goin' to the joint. 611 00:28:33,746 --> 00:28:35,047 No. 612 00:28:35,047 --> 00:28:36,983 I'm a three-time loser, man. 613 00:28:36,983 --> 00:28:40,219 I mean, I'm gonna do some time for this one. 614 00:28:40,219 --> 00:28:44,857 And I don't feel like dyin' in jail. 615 00:28:44,857 --> 00:28:46,759 Hmm. 616 00:28:48,194 --> 00:28:49,962 You with me? 617 00:28:49,962 --> 00:28:51,230 What? 618 00:28:51,230 --> 00:28:53,165 Are you with me? 619 00:28:53,165 --> 00:28:54,901 What do you mean? 620 00:28:54,901 --> 00:28:57,870 We outta here. You with me? 621 00:28:57,870 --> 00:28:59,505 Oh, no. 622 00:28:59,505 --> 00:29:02,174 You gotta be crazy. I'm not goin' with you. 623 00:29:02,174 --> 00:29:03,976 You go yourself. 624 00:29:03,976 --> 00:29:06,545 You're a murderer, I'm just a-- 625 00:29:06,545 --> 00:29:08,047 I didn't mean that. I didn't mean-- 626 00:29:08,047 --> 00:29:09,782 Ohh! 627 00:29:09,782 --> 00:29:12,284 I make my move, you best keep up. You dig? 628 00:29:12,284 --> 00:29:14,220 I dig very much, sir. 629 00:29:15,955 --> 00:29:18,057 No, wait! I changed my mind! 630 00:29:18,057 --> 00:29:19,558 Please! I don't wanna go with you! 631 00:29:19,558 --> 00:29:21,127 I can't! I'll never keep up! 632 00:29:21,127 --> 00:29:24,096 ( Sirens blare ) 633 00:29:44,283 --> 00:29:45,885 Let's go. 634 00:29:47,820 --> 00:29:49,922 Oh, no. No. no... 635 00:29:51,023 --> 00:29:51,924 Aaah! 636 00:29:54,026 --> 00:29:55,895 ( Dogs barking ) 637 00:30:07,239 --> 00:30:09,341 ( Sirens continue ) 638 00:30:26,358 --> 00:30:28,027 WOMAN: Who is it? 639 00:30:28,027 --> 00:30:31,097 It's me, baby. Open up. 640 00:30:31,097 --> 00:30:34,901 Muhammed, what are you doing here? 641 00:30:34,901 --> 00:30:35,767 What do you mean, what am I doing here? 642 00:30:35,767 --> 00:30:37,603 I'm here to see you. You look good, baby. 643 00:30:37,603 --> 00:30:39,138 How about a little sugar? Never mind the sugar. 644 00:30:39,138 --> 00:30:41,140 I don't have any time. I'm running late. 645 00:30:41,140 --> 00:30:43,042 Do you think I could borrow a hacksaw? 646 00:30:43,042 --> 00:30:44,944 Who's the surfer? 647 00:30:44,944 --> 00:30:46,145 I just want to cut this off, and I'm gone. 648 00:30:46,145 --> 00:30:48,214 Later. Sit down. Ohhh! 649 00:30:48,214 --> 00:30:49,648 Baby, you look good. 650 00:30:49,648 --> 00:30:51,083 What are you doing in handcuffs?! 651 00:30:51,083 --> 00:30:53,319 I got busted. It's a long story. 652 00:30:53,319 --> 00:30:55,021 That's it. Get out of my house. 653 00:30:55,021 --> 00:30:56,923 I'm not harboring escaped criminals. 654 00:30:56,923 --> 00:30:58,290 Do you have an acetylene torch I could borrow? 655 00:30:58,290 --> 00:31:00,292 Sit down! 656 00:31:00,292 --> 00:31:02,661 Listen to how the woman talks to the man that pays the rent. 657 00:31:02,661 --> 00:31:04,430 In your dreams. 658 00:31:04,430 --> 00:31:06,198 You never paid my rent in your life! 659 00:31:06,198 --> 00:31:07,666 Well, look, I was gone. 660 00:31:07,666 --> 00:31:09,135 I just never got around to it. 661 00:31:09,135 --> 00:31:10,937 It looks good, baby. 662 00:31:12,171 --> 00:31:14,306 Hey--what's this? 663 00:31:14,306 --> 00:31:16,042 Nothing. 664 00:31:16,042 --> 00:31:17,910 It looks like a suitcase to me! 665 00:31:17,910 --> 00:31:19,045 You don't want to know. Don't get involved. 666 00:31:19,045 --> 00:31:20,312 Hey, baby. Baby. 667 00:31:20,312 --> 00:31:22,148 Now, where my baby goin'? 668 00:31:22,148 --> 00:31:24,083 I got a date. 669 00:31:24,083 --> 00:31:25,384 See? It's just a date. 670 00:31:25,384 --> 00:31:27,686 A date? Looks more serious than a date! 671 00:31:27,686 --> 00:31:29,455 Looks more like an overnight trip! 672 00:31:29,455 --> 00:31:32,058 Who you been seein' behind my back? 673 00:31:32,058 --> 00:31:33,692 Look, it's probably just a pajama party. 674 00:31:33,692 --> 00:31:35,694 A bunch of girl get together, 675 00:31:35,694 --> 00:31:37,196 they play some records, they have some popcorn. 676 00:31:37,196 --> 00:31:40,666 Francine, get out here, now! 677 00:31:40,666 --> 00:31:43,035 I'll come out when I feel like it! 678 00:31:43,035 --> 00:31:44,370 Be gentle with the woman. 679 00:31:44,370 --> 00:31:46,005 Women like when you're gentle. 680 00:31:46,005 --> 00:31:47,273 I'm gentle, it worked for me all the time. 681 00:31:47,273 --> 00:31:48,207 I'm tellin' ya, it--it-- 682 00:31:50,142 --> 00:31:52,644 I'll just shut the fuck right up. 683 00:31:52,644 --> 00:31:55,281 I don't belong to you. I don't belong to anyone. 684 00:31:55,281 --> 00:31:56,715 And I advise you to get out of here 685 00:31:56,715 --> 00:31:58,350 before heÀgets here. 686 00:31:58,350 --> 00:32:00,152 Oh, lady, please reconsider. 687 00:32:00,152 --> 00:32:01,954 You could help us, you know. Before who gets here? 688 00:32:01,954 --> 00:32:03,422 Before he gets here. 689 00:32:03,422 --> 00:32:05,091 Look, I want him to get here. 690 00:32:05,091 --> 00:32:06,725 Matter of fact, I'm in the mood for a fight. 691 00:32:06,725 --> 00:32:09,161 I'm not afraid of him, you, you, nobody. 692 00:32:09,161 --> 00:32:11,497 And no woman talks to Muhammed Jerome Willy the way you been doin', 693 00:32:11,497 --> 00:32:13,299 and especially not in front of company! 694 00:32:13,299 --> 00:32:16,702 I'm not impressed with your company! Now get out of here! 695 00:32:16,702 --> 00:32:19,471 No woman, nobody tells me to get out! 696 00:32:19,471 --> 00:32:21,173 I'm tellin' ya to get out! 697 00:32:24,510 --> 00:32:27,513 I wish I could take that back, 698 00:32:27,513 --> 00:32:28,981 I didn't mean to say it. 699 00:32:28,981 --> 00:32:30,682 I'm sorry I yelled. 700 00:32:30,682 --> 00:32:33,085 What I wanted to say was just... 701 00:32:33,085 --> 00:32:34,486 that maybe we could all sit down like adults 702 00:32:34,486 --> 00:32:36,522 and just talk. 703 00:32:36,522 --> 00:32:38,257 I'm very sorry. I'm sorry for yelling. 704 00:32:38,257 --> 00:32:39,491 Fine. 705 00:32:39,491 --> 00:32:41,427 Let's sit down like adults. 706 00:32:41,427 --> 00:32:43,095 Let's just sit down. Fine. 707 00:32:44,196 --> 00:32:46,265 Ah. 708 00:32:46,265 --> 00:32:49,068 You're nothin' but a goddamn lazy no-good fool! 709 00:32:49,068 --> 00:32:51,003 And you're nothin' but a two-timin' bitch! 710 00:32:51,003 --> 00:32:54,173 You're nothin' but trouble. I hope they hang your ass! 711 00:32:54,173 --> 00:32:56,008 Good, 'cause that's just what they're gonna do! 712 00:32:56,008 --> 00:32:58,177 Doesn't that feel better now? 713 00:32:58,177 --> 00:32:59,411 Huh? 714 00:32:59,411 --> 00:33:02,081 Let's get out of here. Come on. 715 00:33:02,081 --> 00:33:05,184 We break out, runnin' and hidin' from the police, 716 00:33:05,184 --> 00:33:07,019 come all the way over here to see you... 717 00:33:07,019 --> 00:33:09,155 Only reason we came over anyway was to say goodbye. 718 00:33:09,155 --> 00:33:13,225 That's why you came over? To say goodbye? 719 00:33:13,225 --> 00:33:15,194 You mean in the midst of all that trouble 720 00:33:15,194 --> 00:33:16,428 you came over to see me? 721 00:33:16,428 --> 00:33:18,297 That's right. 722 00:33:18,297 --> 00:33:20,199 But that's okay because I'm ready to face the heat. 723 00:33:20,199 --> 00:33:22,168 I know the police are out there with their machine guns 724 00:33:22,168 --> 00:33:24,403 and helicopters, and we gonna get blown away. 725 00:33:24,403 --> 00:33:26,438 But that's all right too, 'cause we ready to die. 726 00:33:26,438 --> 00:33:28,240 No we're not. 727 00:33:28,240 --> 00:33:30,209 But at least I got a chance to behold my baby's face 728 00:33:30,209 --> 00:33:32,311 one last time. 729 00:33:32,311 --> 00:33:34,213 Oh... 730 00:33:35,481 --> 00:33:38,117 Listen to this here. 731 00:33:41,520 --> 00:33:42,554 Muhammed, don't go. 732 00:33:42,554 --> 00:33:44,190 Say "please." 733 00:33:44,190 --> 00:33:45,324 Please. 734 00:33:45,324 --> 00:33:47,259 Please. 735 00:33:47,259 --> 00:33:51,063 Oh, baby, I love the way you say "please." 736 00:33:51,063 --> 00:33:52,398 That was a great "please." 737 00:33:52,398 --> 00:33:54,266 You're so good to Muhammed. 738 00:33:54,266 --> 00:33:55,434 Oh... 739 00:33:55,434 --> 00:33:58,504 did my big Muhammed miss me? 740 00:33:58,504 --> 00:34:00,472 Oh, baby, Muhammed missed you. 741 00:34:00,472 --> 00:34:03,075 How much did he miss me? 742 00:34:03,075 --> 00:34:05,344 I missed the smell of your hair, 743 00:34:05,344 --> 00:34:06,812 the taste of your neck... 744 00:34:06,812 --> 00:34:08,547 Don't waste it. 745 00:34:08,547 --> 00:34:10,249 Ohh! 746 00:34:10,249 --> 00:34:13,185 Oh, no. Hey, man, you got to go. ÀWhy? 747 00:34:13,185 --> 00:34:14,620 Now. Ah, don't. 748 00:34:14,620 --> 00:34:16,355 Out. Bye. Ah, come on. 749 00:34:16,355 --> 00:34:18,424 Thank you. 750 00:34:18,424 --> 00:34:20,392 Let's jump to it, baby. 751 00:34:21,827 --> 00:34:23,495 About how long? 752 00:34:23,495 --> 00:34:25,264 Not long, man-- get outta here! 753 00:34:40,279 --> 00:34:43,249 MUHAMMED: Oh, baby. Oh, baby! 754 00:34:43,249 --> 00:34:44,816 Unh! Unh! 755 00:34:44,816 --> 00:34:47,219 Yes! Unh! 756 00:34:47,219 --> 00:34:50,122 FRANCINE: Oh, it's been so long... 757 00:34:50,122 --> 00:34:52,858 ( Both moaning ) 758 00:35:01,167 --> 00:35:03,535 ( Banging against door ) 759 00:35:03,535 --> 00:35:05,571 FRANCINE: Oh, Muhammed, you thrill me! 760 00:35:05,571 --> 00:35:08,640 More! More! More! Ohh! Ohh! Ohh! 761 00:35:13,279 --> 00:35:15,914 You're so good, you're so good.... 762 00:35:15,914 --> 00:35:17,349 Oh, baby... 763 00:35:19,618 --> 00:35:21,887 ( Panting ) 764 00:35:28,294 --> 00:35:30,929 Can I give you a hand there? Would ya? 765 00:35:30,929 --> 00:35:33,199 Just hold this while I open the door. 766 00:35:35,367 --> 00:35:37,669 ( Muhammed and Francine moaning and yelling ) 767 00:35:57,423 --> 00:35:58,457 Thanks. 768 00:35:58,457 --> 00:36:00,392 Yeah, sure. 769 00:36:02,428 --> 00:36:04,663 Push! Push! Push! Push! Push! Push! 770 00:36:04,663 --> 00:36:06,698 Push! Push! 771 00:36:06,698 --> 00:36:08,900 Baby!!!!!!! Aaaaaaahhhh! 772 00:36:10,669 --> 00:36:13,472 Oh, you're the king! You're the king! 773 00:36:13,472 --> 00:36:15,507 Ohh! Ohh! 774 00:36:18,377 --> 00:36:19,311 Muhammed? 775 00:36:20,479 --> 00:36:22,348 Muhammed? 776 00:36:22,348 --> 00:36:24,683 Aaaaaah! Oh, my God! What's wrong? 777 00:36:24,683 --> 00:36:26,618 He's dead! ÀWhat? 778 00:36:26,618 --> 00:36:27,719 He's dead! Oh, my God, he's dead! 779 00:36:27,719 --> 00:36:29,488 He's what? 780 00:36:29,488 --> 00:36:32,258 Dead! Aaaaah!!!! 781 00:37:00,652 --> 00:37:02,654 Chick. Yeah, it's me, John. 782 00:37:02,654 --> 00:37:04,456 I'm in a little bit of trouble here. 783 00:37:04,456 --> 00:37:07,259 I wonder if you could come down here real quickly. 784 00:37:08,527 --> 00:37:10,462 Yeah, I'm at, uh... 785 00:37:12,531 --> 00:37:14,700 Okay, boys, last call. 786 00:37:14,700 --> 00:37:17,436 I'll have another draft, please. 787 00:37:17,436 --> 00:37:20,539 And, uh, another screwdriver for my friend. 788 00:37:20,539 --> 00:37:22,441 What's the matter with your friend? 789 00:37:22,441 --> 00:37:25,411 Ah, just-- just still meditating. 790 00:37:25,411 --> 00:37:27,546 He looks drunk as a skunk to me. 791 00:37:27,546 --> 00:37:28,980 Yeah. 792 00:37:32,351 --> 00:37:34,453 I just hope rigor mortis doesn't set in. 793 00:37:34,453 --> 00:37:36,455 Whoa! Hey! 794 00:37:36,455 --> 00:37:39,024 Muhammed Jerome Willy! 795 00:37:39,024 --> 00:37:41,059 My man, look out! 796 00:37:41,059 --> 00:37:44,296 What's happenin', blood? Huh? 797 00:37:44,296 --> 00:37:46,732 Hey, man, it's me, Wallace Jefferson, 798 00:37:46,732 --> 00:37:48,534 you remember me. 799 00:37:48,534 --> 00:37:50,502 Draft beer for you 800 00:37:50,502 --> 00:37:53,739 and a screwdriver for Mr. Personality. 801 00:37:53,739 --> 00:37:55,541 Hey, man, 802 00:37:55,541 --> 00:37:57,576 you remember Maurice Walker, the car thief? 803 00:37:57,576 --> 00:37:59,611 Ha ha ha! He's dead! 804 00:37:59,611 --> 00:38:02,414 Yeah, his old lady threw him down an elevator shaft. 805 00:38:02,414 --> 00:38:03,815 Musta happened three, four years ago... 806 00:38:03,815 --> 00:38:05,751 Chick! Where in the hell were you?! What's up? 807 00:38:05,751 --> 00:38:08,454 ( Continues talking ) 808 00:38:08,454 --> 00:38:11,056 This guy next to me is dead. He's what?! 809 00:38:11,056 --> 00:38:13,492 He's dead! Who's the other guy? 810 00:38:13,492 --> 00:38:16,395 I don't know. Did you bring it? Yeah. 811 00:38:16,395 --> 00:38:18,797 Just cut-- cut this off. 812 00:38:18,797 --> 00:38:21,567 So how you been, Muhammed? 813 00:38:21,567 --> 00:38:24,336 You was always the-- This cat's always the life of party. 814 00:38:24,336 --> 00:38:26,338 Really? Funny you say that. 815 00:38:26,338 --> 00:38:28,574 Oh, yeah. You can always depend on Muhammed. 816 00:38:28,574 --> 00:38:31,076 This is my main man. You in good company, Jack. 817 00:38:31,076 --> 00:38:33,745 Ha ha! We were just talkin' about ya. 818 00:38:33,745 --> 00:38:35,747 You have mellowed out a lot, man. 819 00:38:35,747 --> 00:38:37,349 That's good, brother, that's good. 820 00:38:37,349 --> 00:38:38,617 Same thing with me, too. 821 00:38:38,617 --> 00:38:40,852 Are you still with Francine? Huh? 822 00:38:40,852 --> 00:38:43,622 I been meanin' to talk to you about that. 823 00:38:43,622 --> 00:38:45,624 That's a heckuva woman you got there. 824 00:38:45,624 --> 00:38:47,626 Personally, I never thought you had the energy for her. 825 00:38:47,626 --> 00:38:49,628 But I can see you done mellowed out now. 826 00:38:49,628 --> 00:38:52,564 You're cool, and that's good, brother, 827 00:38:52,564 --> 00:38:55,534 because we get older, we gotta start thinking about our future, man. 828 00:38:55,534 --> 00:38:56,568 You know? 829 00:38:58,370 --> 00:38:59,638 What you lookin' at, bro? 830 00:38:59,638 --> 00:39:01,072 I'll tell you all about it later. 831 00:39:01,072 --> 00:39:02,140 I just want to get out of here. 832 00:39:02,140 --> 00:39:03,509 I feel kind of funny 833 00:39:03,509 --> 00:39:05,477 just leaving him sit there like that. 834 00:39:05,477 --> 00:39:07,579 Well, at least he's with his friend. 835 00:39:07,579 --> 00:39:09,448 By the way, Nancy set up a meeting 836 00:39:09,448 --> 00:39:11,383 between Ed Reese and Sal for tomorrow. 837 00:39:11,383 --> 00:39:13,385 I can't make it, I'm exhausted. 838 00:39:13,385 --> 00:39:14,920 You gotta cover for me. 839 00:39:14,920 --> 00:39:17,389 Awright, get some rest. I'll cover for you. 840 00:39:17,389 --> 00:39:19,491 Pal, I owe you for this. 841 00:39:27,899 --> 00:39:29,568 SAL: N ice tits, huh, Congressman? 842 00:39:29,568 --> 00:39:33,505 I'm sorry, I meant to say breasts. 843 00:39:33,505 --> 00:39:36,742 That was very crass, I'm sorry. 844 00:39:36,742 --> 00:39:38,677 NANCY: Y our wife was a very beautiful woman, 845 00:39:38,677 --> 00:39:40,579 Mr. DiPasquale. 846 00:39:40,579 --> 00:39:41,913 Yes, she was, Nancy. 847 00:39:41,913 --> 00:39:43,915 She certainly was. 848 00:39:43,915 --> 00:39:45,717 See, she-- 849 00:39:45,717 --> 00:39:47,619 She wanted to be an actress. 850 00:39:47,619 --> 00:39:50,589 I was a very important film director at that time-- 851 00:39:50,589 --> 00:39:52,924 a very important, prominent movie director-- 852 00:39:52,924 --> 00:39:55,927 and she was using me to get to the top. 853 00:39:55,927 --> 00:39:57,663 And that... 854 00:39:57,663 --> 00:40:01,533 that hurt me very, very deeply. 855 00:40:01,533 --> 00:40:03,835 Let's get this thing started, shall we? 856 00:40:03,835 --> 00:40:06,171 I have other things on my agenda this evening. 857 00:40:06,171 --> 00:40:07,739 I'm sure you do, Congressman. 858 00:40:07,739 --> 00:40:09,841 I mean, what with runnin' for president and all. 859 00:40:09,841 --> 00:40:12,444 Please have a seat. Nancy? 860 00:40:12,444 --> 00:40:14,713 Aprs vous, as they say in Paris. 861 00:40:14,713 --> 00:40:17,683 I'll get some champagne, 862 00:40:17,683 --> 00:40:19,585 because... 863 00:40:21,553 --> 00:40:23,755 ...I wanna propose a toast. 864 00:40:25,156 --> 00:40:26,925 Oh, thank you. Okay. 865 00:40:29,227 --> 00:40:33,632 To a very successful campaign... 866 00:40:33,632 --> 00:40:36,702 and an equally successful marriage. 867 00:40:42,508 --> 00:40:43,842 That's warm! 868 00:40:43,842 --> 00:40:45,611 I just picked it up, 869 00:40:45,611 --> 00:40:47,479 I didn't have a chance to chill it. 870 00:40:47,479 --> 00:40:49,214 It's not bad. I think it's French. 871 00:40:49,214 --> 00:40:52,017 I hope you understand, Mr. DiPasquale, 872 00:40:52,017 --> 00:40:56,021 I like the idea of capturing my daughter's wedding on film. 873 00:40:56,021 --> 00:40:58,790 I think the American public would enjoy seeing 874 00:40:58,790 --> 00:41:01,793 the daughter of a prominent politician 875 00:41:01,793 --> 00:41:04,763 marry an ordinary, hard-working American boy. 876 00:41:04,763 --> 00:41:07,766 But I'm not at all acquainted with your work, 877 00:41:07,766 --> 00:41:09,267 and on first impression, 878 00:41:09,267 --> 00:41:11,837 I'm not at all impressed by your lifestyle 879 00:41:11,837 --> 00:41:13,605 or your character. 880 00:41:14,773 --> 00:41:16,542 Hmm. 881 00:41:16,542 --> 00:41:18,243 NANCY: Why don't we just take a look 882 00:41:18,243 --> 00:41:20,546 at Mr. DiPasquale's film, Daddy? 883 00:41:20,546 --> 00:41:23,615 That's a wonderful idea, Congressman. 884 00:41:23,615 --> 00:41:24,916 Why don't we look at the film? 885 00:41:24,916 --> 00:41:26,685 Chick? 886 00:41:26,685 --> 00:41:28,654 Huh? Oh. 887 00:41:28,654 --> 00:41:31,723 'Cause I think my work speaks for itself. 888 00:41:31,723 --> 00:41:33,992 Get the lights while you're back there, Chick. 889 00:41:37,529 --> 00:41:42,668 * 890 00:41:42,668 --> 00:41:44,536 Kee-yah! 891 00:41:48,540 --> 00:41:50,876 Kung Fu U.!!! 892 00:41:52,811 --> 00:41:54,980 This was a very difficult film to put together. 893 00:41:54,980 --> 00:41:57,048 Hey, young fella. Listen-- 894 00:41:57,048 --> 00:41:59,818 Why don't you try out some of our other facilities? 895 00:41:59,818 --> 00:42:01,953 We've got a lot of facilities here, 896 00:42:01,953 --> 00:42:03,855 like, well, the Athletic Department. 897 00:42:03,855 --> 00:42:06,024 And there's a wonderful library. Yes, I know. 898 00:42:06,024 --> 00:42:07,859 Why don't you check them out when you get a chance? 899 00:42:07,859 --> 00:42:09,861 I'll do that. Now just beat it. 900 00:42:09,861 --> 00:42:12,297 Thank you very much. See you tonight. 901 00:42:12,297 --> 00:42:15,667 So the Korean said, "Lice? I thought you meant rice!" 902 00:42:15,667 --> 00:42:17,803 Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! 903 00:42:17,803 --> 00:42:19,905 Ohh! Oh, that's funny. 904 00:42:24,976 --> 00:42:26,277 ( clatter ) 905 00:42:41,860 --> 00:42:45,296 Hey, you, freshman! Go get me some food! 906 00:42:45,296 --> 00:42:46,998 Snap to it! 907 00:42:46,998 --> 00:42:48,634 Chou. 908 00:42:55,707 --> 00:42:58,143 That scene there was critically acclaimed 909 00:42:58,143 --> 00:42:59,845 in papers across this country. 910 00:42:59,845 --> 00:43:01,713 The reviewers ate it up. 911 00:43:01,713 --> 00:43:03,915 We must teach them a lesson. 912 00:43:03,915 --> 00:43:06,985 Seduce her! 913 00:43:06,985 --> 00:43:09,888 Can't you read the sign? No seducing in the cafeteria! 914 00:43:09,888 --> 00:43:12,624 A-ha ha ha ha ha! 915 00:43:12,624 --> 00:43:13,925 Now you'll pay the piper! 916 00:43:18,830 --> 00:43:20,832 ( Kung fu screams ) 917 00:43:29,675 --> 00:43:31,977 Me-me-me-me-me-me! 918 00:43:35,647 --> 00:43:37,082 It was very big in France. 919 00:43:48,193 --> 00:43:50,128 Okay... 920 00:43:50,128 --> 00:43:51,997 All rightie... 921 00:43:55,200 --> 00:43:56,935 Now I gotcha! 922 00:43:56,935 --> 00:43:58,837 And up! And together! 923 00:43:58,837 --> 00:44:00,405 And one and two and one and-- 924 00:44:00,405 --> 00:44:02,007 Take that! 925 00:44:02,007 --> 00:44:05,076 There you go! Goin' south! 926 00:44:05,076 --> 00:44:06,678 All right, you-- 927 00:44:06,678 --> 00:44:08,680 You wanna play rough, huh? 928 00:44:08,680 --> 00:44:10,448 Take that! And that! And that! 929 00:44:10,448 --> 00:44:11,683 Okay! Hunh! Hunh! Hunh! 930 00:44:11,683 --> 00:44:13,084 REESE: I've seen enough. 931 00:44:13,084 --> 00:44:15,854 I thought that's all it would take. 932 00:44:17,956 --> 00:44:19,825 Nancy, honey, 933 00:44:19,825 --> 00:44:21,893 will you wait for me down in the limousine? 934 00:44:21,893 --> 00:44:24,796 Let me talk a little business to Mr. DiPasquale. 935 00:44:24,796 --> 00:44:26,765 That's a good idea, Congressman. 936 00:44:26,765 --> 00:44:28,099 I won't be long, baby. 937 00:44:28,099 --> 00:44:30,201 Take him with you, will ya? 938 00:44:30,201 --> 00:44:32,070 Nice meetin' you, Nancy. 939 00:44:32,070 --> 00:44:34,005 Chick, go on. 940 00:44:36,007 --> 00:44:39,410 So, uh, Congressman, where should we start here? 941 00:44:39,410 --> 00:44:42,213 I have some marvelous ideas about the procession itself, 942 00:44:42,213 --> 00:44:43,849 but if you wanna talk money, 943 00:44:43,849 --> 00:44:45,116 then maybe we should talk budget. 944 00:44:45,116 --> 00:44:46,852 I wouldn't give you a wooden nickel 945 00:44:46,852 --> 00:44:48,987 to film my daughter's wedding. 946 00:44:48,987 --> 00:44:51,422 I think this whole wedding idea 947 00:44:51,422 --> 00:44:53,424 is a very bum idea. 948 00:44:53,424 --> 00:44:57,128 I--I'm sorry to hear ya say that, Congressman. 949 00:44:57,128 --> 00:44:59,765 I didn't really wanna have to do this, 950 00:44:59,765 --> 00:45:01,867 but, you know, I gotta-- 951 00:45:01,867 --> 00:45:04,836 Have you ever heard of the Del Marino Motel? 952 00:45:06,738 --> 00:45:08,073 What are you talking about? 953 00:45:08,073 --> 00:45:10,008 Well, it might be coincidental, 954 00:45:10,008 --> 00:45:12,978 but I got a property... 955 00:45:12,978 --> 00:45:16,514 ...and, uh, it seems to have your name on it. 956 00:45:16,514 --> 00:45:19,184 Unless, of course, there's a different Ed Reese. 957 00:45:19,184 --> 00:45:22,187 I thought you might wanna take a look at it. 958 00:45:39,871 --> 00:45:41,907 ( Dogs barking ) 959 00:45:43,942 --> 00:45:46,978 CHICK: Calling Limo One. 960 00:45:46,978 --> 00:45:50,115 This is Dispatch. Come in, Limo One. 961 00:45:50,115 --> 00:45:53,785 JOHN: Yeah, this is Limo One. We only got one limo. 962 00:45:53,785 --> 00:45:57,022 Whaddya want, Chick? 963 00:45:57,022 --> 00:46:00,491 Don't forget to get over to the aerobics clinic tonight. 964 00:46:00,491 --> 00:46:02,193 That lady asked for you specifically. 965 00:46:02,193 --> 00:46:04,329 Yeah, all right. 966 00:46:04,329 --> 00:46:06,064 I'm gonna go to Mom's and grab a burger. 967 00:46:06,064 --> 00:46:07,966 Haven't been there in years. 968 00:46:07,966 --> 00:46:10,035 I've had a craving for burgers all day. 969 00:46:10,035 --> 00:46:12,303 A nice, quiet meal at Mom's. 970 00:46:14,339 --> 00:46:15,240 ( Clank ) 971 00:46:44,235 --> 00:46:46,938 Ohh! Ha ha! 972 00:46:46,938 --> 00:46:48,874 What are you doing to my head, sir? 973 00:46:48,874 --> 00:46:50,241 I will pay for this, 974 00:46:50,241 --> 00:46:52,310 I will pay for any inconvenience or damage done to you. 975 00:47:00,852 --> 00:47:03,154 ( Rock music blares ) 976 00:47:41,392 --> 00:47:43,194 ( Music stops ) 977 00:47:43,194 --> 00:47:46,097 What happened to the music?! 978 00:47:46,097 --> 00:47:48,299 Music! Come on! 979 00:47:50,301 --> 00:47:53,038 I don't like purple-headed faggots jumpin' up and down. 980 00:47:53,038 --> 00:47:56,641 Hey, why don't you just leave us alone? 981 00:47:56,641 --> 00:47:59,410 What are you supposed to be, a rooster or somethin'? 982 00:47:59,410 --> 00:48:01,279 Gentlemen, please! Ladies! 983 00:48:01,279 --> 00:48:03,148 Come on! 984 00:48:03,148 --> 00:48:05,350 Have we forgotten our own youth? 985 00:48:05,350 --> 00:48:07,953 You don't remember the '60s? 986 00:48:07,953 --> 00:48:10,055 How rebellious our music was? 987 00:48:10,055 --> 00:48:11,990 Have you forgotten acid rock? 988 00:48:11,990 --> 00:48:14,059 Jimi Hendrix! Woodstock! 989 00:48:14,059 --> 00:48:16,427 And as far as the hair goes, 990 00:48:16,427 --> 00:48:19,330 didn't our own long hair turn a few heads? 991 00:48:19,330 --> 00:48:22,200 Really. Y'know, we should appreciate 992 00:48:22,200 --> 00:48:24,702 another generation's cultural movement! 993 00:48:24,702 --> 00:48:26,637 ( Spits ) Fuck you, hippie! 994 00:48:30,675 --> 00:48:32,077 Fuck you, hippie? 995 00:48:33,644 --> 00:48:36,081 Fuck you, hippie... 996 00:48:36,081 --> 00:48:39,184 You know, I would accept that from anyone else but you, 997 00:48:39,184 --> 00:48:41,052 you fucking rooster-head. 998 00:48:41,052 --> 00:48:42,253 ( Spits ) 999 00:48:42,253 --> 00:48:43,955 Ohh. 1000 00:48:43,955 --> 00:48:47,092 I expect that from you... 1001 00:48:47,092 --> 00:48:49,127 but you owe me an apology! 1002 00:48:50,695 --> 00:48:52,297 He's right. 1003 00:48:55,066 --> 00:48:57,202 CROWD: "S"... 1004 00:48:57,202 --> 00:48:58,503 "O"... 1005 00:48:58,503 --> 00:49:00,105 "R"... 1006 00:49:00,105 --> 00:49:02,273 "R"... 1007 00:49:02,273 --> 00:49:04,109 "Y." 1008 00:49:04,109 --> 00:49:07,512 S-o-r-r-y. "Sorry. 1009 00:49:07,512 --> 00:49:10,415 "Period. 1010 00:49:10,415 --> 00:49:12,117 The end." 1011 00:49:14,519 --> 00:49:17,122 Huh-huh-huh-huh.... 1012 00:49:17,122 --> 00:49:19,257 You know what? 1013 00:49:19,457 --> 00:49:21,993 We've got a failure to communicate. 1014 00:49:21,993 --> 00:49:23,728 That's what it is. 1015 00:49:23,728 --> 00:49:28,066 Now, I could stay here all day long, 1016 00:49:28,066 --> 00:49:30,268 and I could take each one of you on, one at a time. 1017 00:49:30,268 --> 00:49:32,337 But I'm not going to. 1018 00:49:32,337 --> 00:49:36,041 I'm going to leave you with one thought... 1019 00:49:36,041 --> 00:49:38,709 ..this simple message. 1020 00:49:38,709 --> 00:49:44,282 I still believe in it, because this is right. 1021 00:49:44,282 --> 00:49:46,551 I love all of you... 1022 00:49:46,551 --> 00:49:49,020 my brothers and sisters. 1023 00:49:49,020 --> 00:49:51,189 Peace. 1024 00:49:52,290 --> 00:49:55,260 I'm leaving. 1025 00:49:55,260 --> 00:49:57,128 Peace. 1026 00:50:04,435 --> 00:50:06,471 Hey, bowling ball. 1027 00:50:18,049 --> 00:50:19,284 ( Starts car ) 1028 00:50:59,290 --> 00:51:01,426 * TAPE: Higher, higher, 1029 00:51:01,426 --> 00:51:04,095 lift and reach, reach, 1030 00:51:04,095 --> 00:51:06,097 reach for you and reach for me, 1031 00:51:06,097 --> 00:51:07,798 reach for money and success, 1032 00:51:07,798 --> 00:51:09,500 and reach! 1033 00:51:09,500 --> 00:51:12,537 ( Cash resister sound effect ) 1034 00:51:12,537 --> 00:51:15,240 Reach... 1035 00:51:15,240 --> 00:51:17,242 good. Here comes our boy. 1036 00:51:17,242 --> 00:51:18,576 Set everything up. 1037 00:51:18,576 --> 00:51:21,446 This could prove to be very interesting. 1038 00:51:21,446 --> 00:51:23,414 John: Excuse me-- 1039 00:51:33,191 --> 00:51:34,559 Excuse me, sorry to bother ya. 1040 00:51:34,559 --> 00:51:36,294 Limousine time! 1041 00:51:36,294 --> 00:51:37,595 ( chuckles ) 1042 00:51:37,595 --> 00:51:39,364 Take 'em more often. 1043 00:51:42,167 --> 00:51:44,269 Hi. Excuse me. Did you order-- 1044 00:51:44,269 --> 00:51:47,138 Ooh. I'm, uh... 1045 00:51:47,138 --> 00:51:49,207 limousine, uh... 1046 00:51:49,207 --> 00:51:51,142 i'll wait here. 1047 00:51:51,142 --> 00:51:52,577 I'll just wait here. 1048 00:51:58,849 --> 00:52:00,518 Limousine! Ah! 1049 00:52:00,518 --> 00:52:02,620 Ha! Sorry. 1050 00:52:02,620 --> 00:52:05,190 I got the limousine right out front. 1051 00:52:05,190 --> 00:52:06,857 I'm a little early, i'm very sorry. 1052 00:52:06,857 --> 00:52:08,593 Whenever you're ready, right out front. 1053 00:52:08,593 --> 00:52:10,261 Come in for a second. 1054 00:52:10,261 --> 00:52:11,396 Come in? 1055 00:52:17,235 --> 00:52:18,503 This is our driver. 1056 00:52:20,571 --> 00:52:21,939 Hi. John bourgignon. 1057 00:52:21,939 --> 00:52:23,908 Bruno. Hi. Pleased to meet ya. 1058 00:52:23,908 --> 00:52:25,310 I'm clarence. 1059 00:52:25,310 --> 00:52:27,212 Clarence. How are ya? Nice to meet you. 1060 00:52:27,212 --> 00:52:28,546 So, where we goin' this evening? 1061 00:52:30,715 --> 00:52:32,617 Where are we going this evening? 1062 00:52:32,617 --> 00:52:35,586 Where? We're going out. 1063 00:52:35,586 --> 00:52:38,189 We'll tell you on the way there. 1064 00:52:38,189 --> 00:52:39,690 How about a drink, john? 1065 00:52:39,690 --> 00:52:41,526 Not for me, thanks. I'm driving. 1066 00:52:41,526 --> 00:52:45,296 We insist. Just one drink before we start our evening. 1067 00:52:45,296 --> 00:52:47,198 I really can't. It's company policy. 1068 00:52:47,198 --> 00:52:49,334 Oh, please, john, you must have one. 1069 00:52:49,334 --> 00:52:51,502 I can't break that company policy. 1070 00:52:51,502 --> 00:52:53,504 Go ahead, break it. 1071 00:52:54,672 --> 00:52:55,906 Cheers. 1072 00:52:55,906 --> 00:52:57,508 Cheers. 1073 00:52:57,508 --> 00:52:59,510 Bad luck if you don't all clink. 1074 00:53:02,347 --> 00:53:03,414 Ah. 1075 00:53:04,749 --> 00:53:07,585 We'll have ours later. I see. 1076 00:53:07,585 --> 00:53:09,687 Does it come in that bottle? 1077 00:53:09,687 --> 00:53:11,422 I'd like to get the name of that. 1078 00:53:11,422 --> 00:53:13,224 I'm havin' a little party later on. 1079 00:53:13,224 --> 00:53:14,692 How are you feeling? 1080 00:53:14,692 --> 00:53:16,694 Me? I-- 1081 00:53:18,996 --> 00:53:20,665 I don't feel very good. 1082 00:53:20,665 --> 00:53:22,367 Why don't you sit down, john? 1083 00:53:22,367 --> 00:53:23,634 Thank you, I will. 1084 00:53:23,634 --> 00:53:26,237 I kinda gulped it a little fast there. 1085 00:53:26,237 --> 00:53:27,938 I shouldn't do that. 1086 00:53:27,938 --> 00:53:30,241 I've done that since I was a kid, 1087 00:53:30,241 --> 00:53:31,642 i have this bad habit. 1088 00:53:31,642 --> 00:53:33,344 Ohh... 1089 00:53:33,344 --> 00:53:35,446 ohh. 1090 00:53:35,446 --> 00:53:38,015 Just relax, john. 1091 00:53:38,015 --> 00:53:39,617 All right. 1092 00:53:39,617 --> 00:53:44,021 Look at the girls lovely, long-Limbed bodies. 1093 00:53:44,021 --> 00:53:49,960 John, someone wants to take the bodies away. 1094 00:53:49,960 --> 00:53:52,497 No! You gotta be kidding! Those bodies? 1095 00:53:52,497 --> 00:53:54,399 Not a chance. 1096 00:53:54,399 --> 00:53:56,534 He is in our power. 1097 00:53:56,534 --> 00:53:58,403 Show me something. 1098 00:53:58,403 --> 00:54:00,405 Is this a dream, john? 1099 00:54:00,405 --> 00:54:02,307 I don't know. 1100 00:54:02,307 --> 00:54:04,475 I am the only one on this planet, 1101 00:54:04,475 --> 00:54:07,278 the only one in the universe. 1102 00:54:07,278 --> 00:54:09,414 I am your world, john. 1103 00:54:09,414 --> 00:54:11,516 Okay, i'll buy that. 1104 00:54:11,516 --> 00:54:13,751 You'd do anything for me, wouldn't you? 1105 00:54:13,751 --> 00:54:15,420 Yeah, sure. 1106 00:54:15,420 --> 00:54:17,788 Even kill your future father-In-Law. 1107 00:54:17,788 --> 00:54:19,490 Okay. Why not? 1108 00:54:19,490 --> 00:54:21,426 Bark like a dog. 1109 00:54:21,426 --> 00:54:22,993 Arf! Arf! 1110 00:54:22,993 --> 00:54:25,463 Thank you, john, that won't be necessary. 1111 00:54:25,463 --> 00:54:27,598 Very good dog, though. Continue. 1112 00:54:27,598 --> 00:54:30,568 Tomorrow you'll be going to your wedding rehearsal. 1113 00:54:30,568 --> 00:54:32,470 At a certain point 1114 00:54:32,470 --> 00:54:33,804 someone will come up to you 1115 00:54:33,804 --> 00:54:35,806 with a playing card. 1116 00:54:35,806 --> 00:54:40,445 That card will be the five of spades. 1117 00:54:40,445 --> 00:54:43,581 John, do you see this man? 1118 00:54:43,581 --> 00:54:45,383 Yes. 1119 00:54:45,383 --> 00:54:47,585 This man wants to take away the bodies. 1120 00:54:47,585 --> 00:54:49,854 When you see this card, 1121 00:54:49,854 --> 00:54:52,757 you will kill this man. 1122 00:54:52,757 --> 00:54:55,426 Grrr... 1123 00:54:56,627 --> 00:54:58,463 arf! Arf! 1124 00:54:58,463 --> 00:55:00,665 Arf! Arf! Heel. Heel! 1125 00:55:00,665 --> 00:55:03,100 See what you did? Idiot! 1126 00:55:03,100 --> 00:55:06,036 Arf! Arf! Sit! Sit! 1127 00:55:07,872 --> 00:55:10,875 Mambo! Yeah! 1128 00:55:10,875 --> 00:55:12,443 Sun yi: What's this?! 1129 00:55:12,443 --> 00:55:13,878 That's not a killer, that's a schmuck! 1130 00:55:13,878 --> 00:55:15,646 Angela: Something has gone wrong. 1131 00:55:15,646 --> 00:55:18,683 The hypnosis has magnified his most juvenile traits. 1132 00:55:18,683 --> 00:55:21,352 Well, is he gonna kill reese or not? 1133 00:55:21,352 --> 00:55:24,422 We won't know until he sees the five of spades again. 1134 00:55:26,624 --> 00:55:28,726 ( church bell ringing ) 1135 00:55:34,064 --> 00:55:37,067 That irresponsible bastard. I'm gonna kill him! 1136 00:55:37,067 --> 00:55:39,570 Please, mr. Reese. This is a house of worship. 1137 00:55:39,570 --> 00:55:41,706 Oh, for god's sake. Where is he? 1138 00:55:41,706 --> 00:55:44,375 What's the real story, you little weasel? 1139 00:55:44,375 --> 00:55:46,677 I'm sure he had a late fare. 1140 00:55:46,677 --> 00:55:49,113 You don't realize how hard he's been working. 1141 00:55:53,784 --> 00:55:56,787 There he is now! Hi, sweetheart. 1142 00:55:56,787 --> 00:55:59,657 Where have you been? I overslept. 1143 00:55:59,657 --> 00:56:01,492 Now, let me get this straight. 1144 00:56:01,492 --> 00:56:03,494 Patty shows him the five of spades. 1145 00:56:03,494 --> 00:56:06,130 And he either turns into a killer or a schmuck. 1146 00:56:06,130 --> 00:56:08,533 Why don't we all assume our positions? 1147 00:56:08,533 --> 00:56:10,401 Has anyone seen patty? 1148 00:56:10,401 --> 00:56:11,902 I'll go find her. 1149 00:56:11,902 --> 00:56:13,538 Thanks, john. 1150 00:56:16,941 --> 00:56:18,809 Patty, what are you doing here? Come on. 1151 00:56:18,809 --> 00:56:20,445 John, would you sit down? 1152 00:56:20,445 --> 00:56:21,579 They're waitin' out there. 1153 00:56:21,579 --> 00:56:22,913 Sit down! 1154 00:56:22,913 --> 00:56:24,715 Ohh! What is it? 1155 00:56:24,715 --> 00:56:26,917 I have something that I have to show you. 1156 00:56:26,917 --> 00:56:30,421 It's very important that you see this. 1157 00:56:30,421 --> 00:56:32,690 It's a matter of life and death. 1158 00:56:32,690 --> 00:56:34,124 What is it? 1159 00:56:42,433 --> 00:56:44,435 MINISTER: Okay, 1160 00:56:44,435 --> 00:56:47,204 we'll start off with "Dearly beloved" and all that, 1161 00:56:47,204 --> 00:56:49,840 then we'll move straight into the personal vows 1162 00:56:49,840 --> 00:56:52,710 that Nancy and John have written for themselves. 1163 00:56:52,710 --> 00:56:55,513 Would you care to read those so I'll know what to expect? 1164 00:56:58,616 --> 00:57:00,150 "I, Nancy, 1165 00:57:00,150 --> 00:57:01,952 "take thee, John, 1166 00:57:01,952 --> 00:57:04,955 "in soul and body, Hmm... 1167 00:57:04,955 --> 00:57:07,658 "and offer all my love to thee 1168 00:57:07,658 --> 00:57:10,995 as our separate lives merge into one." 1169 00:57:10,995 --> 00:57:12,229 Lovely. 1170 00:57:12,229 --> 00:57:13,664 Wait, I'm not quite done yet. 1171 00:57:13,664 --> 00:57:15,933 "With this ring, 1172 00:57:15,933 --> 00:57:19,470 "a circle of our precious love, 1173 00:57:19,470 --> 00:57:21,539 I thee wed." 1174 00:57:21,539 --> 00:57:24,008 Is that it? 1175 00:57:24,008 --> 00:57:27,545 Yes. And then John says his vows. 1176 00:57:27,545 --> 00:57:29,547 John? 1177 00:57:29,547 --> 00:57:31,916 Huaaaah! Let's consummate the marriage now! 1178 00:57:31,916 --> 00:57:34,785 Dive! Dive! Bbbbrrh! Bbbbrrh! 1179 00:57:34,785 --> 00:57:38,489 Yeah! It's hickey time! 1180 00:57:38,489 --> 00:57:41,659 He's acting like a schmuck! He's not gonna kill anybody. 1181 00:57:41,659 --> 00:57:43,661 No, he's not. He'll have to be reprogrammed. 1182 00:57:43,661 --> 00:57:44,895 What's he gonna do? 1183 00:57:44,895 --> 00:57:45,963 There's no telling what he'll do. 1184 00:57:45,963 --> 00:57:47,965 Ha ha ha ha! 1185 00:57:47,965 --> 00:57:50,735 Ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha ha! 1186 00:57:50,735 --> 00:57:52,770 A little decorum, please! 1187 00:57:52,770 --> 00:57:54,905 Did you say decorum? 1188 00:57:54,905 --> 00:57:57,642 Did you say decorum? 1189 00:57:57,642 --> 00:58:00,578 That big word coming out of this little cute mouth-- 1190 00:58:00,578 --> 00:58:01,746 Say "decorum" again. 1191 00:58:01,746 --> 00:58:04,515 Decorum! Decorum! 1192 00:58:04,515 --> 00:58:05,983 I'm gonna put you up on the mantel. 1193 00:58:05,983 --> 00:58:08,686 You sit right there. I wanna talk to everybody. 1194 00:58:08,686 --> 00:58:10,588 Mom, Dad, Grandma, 1195 00:58:10,588 --> 00:58:13,824 Patty, Nancy--I'd like to talk about my dick! 1196 00:58:13,824 --> 00:58:15,526 John, what are you doing? 1197 00:58:15,526 --> 00:58:17,995 It's about this wide. ( Gasps ) 1198 00:58:17,995 --> 00:58:21,832 I'm gonna kill him! Who's "Dick"?! 1199 00:58:21,832 --> 00:58:24,535 JOHN: Like I keep tellin' ya, I don't know. 1200 00:58:24,535 --> 00:58:26,003 I draw a blank. I can't remember anything. 1201 00:58:26,003 --> 00:58:27,838 What did I say to that minister? 1202 00:58:27,838 --> 00:58:29,907 You looked him right in the eye and said, "She's sexy." 1203 00:58:29,907 --> 00:58:31,676 Oh, my God, I'm gonna kill myself. 1204 00:58:31,676 --> 00:58:35,613 Now, look, this psychiatrist we're going to is great. 1205 00:58:35,613 --> 00:58:37,682 In fact, he's the one that cured Sal. 1206 00:58:37,682 --> 00:58:42,587 I gonna kill myself. 1207 00:58:42,587 --> 00:58:44,589 Looks like a mushroom. 1208 00:58:44,589 --> 00:58:45,956 MAN: You must have some fear. 1209 00:58:45,956 --> 00:58:48,058 that's unspoken. 1210 00:58:48,058 --> 00:58:49,827 You must have some dream, a recurrent nightmare... 1211 00:58:49,827 --> 00:58:51,629 What haunts you? 1212 00:58:51,629 --> 00:58:53,698 A dream-- 1213 00:58:53,698 --> 00:58:56,834 I got a dream that comes almost every night or... 1214 00:58:56,834 --> 00:58:58,335 every other night. 1215 00:58:58,335 --> 00:59:00,104 All right, tell me about that. 1216 00:59:00,104 --> 00:59:04,308 Well, I don't know, it's a little embarrassing. 1217 00:59:04,308 --> 00:59:06,577 Y'know, it's one of those dreams 1218 00:59:06,577 --> 00:59:08,278 you don't want to talk about. 1219 00:59:08,278 --> 00:59:11,315 You can trust me, I'm a professional. 1220 00:59:11,315 --> 00:59:12,850 Yeah... 1221 00:59:12,850 --> 00:59:14,652 Come on. 1222 00:59:14,652 --> 00:59:16,320 All right, what the hell. 1223 00:59:17,988 --> 00:59:20,124 Well, I... 1224 00:59:20,124 --> 00:59:22,793 It always starts on this desert island, 1225 00:59:22,793 --> 00:59:28,666 and there's this beautiful girl there... 1226 00:59:28,666 --> 00:59:31,769 I must admit, I am kinda sexy in this dream. 1227 00:59:31,769 --> 00:59:34,338 Did you ever see that mov The Blue Lagoon? 1228 00:59:34,338 --> 00:59:36,674 Well, it's kinda like that, I guess. 1229 00:59:36,674 --> 00:59:38,876 I'm on this island with this beautiful girl. 1230 00:59:38,876 --> 00:59:40,745 I don't know how she got there, 1231 00:59:40,745 --> 00:59:43,113 but you can do whatever you want in a dream, right? 1232 00:59:43,113 --> 00:59:45,349 I really, I think, turn her on a lot. 1233 00:59:45,349 --> 00:59:48,052 But I'm not into that, y'know? 1234 00:59:48,052 --> 00:59:49,787 No--she wants games, all the time. 1235 00:59:53,057 --> 00:59:55,125 She keeps on eating fruit in front of me 1236 00:59:55,125 --> 00:59:56,927 to show me that she's horny. 1237 00:59:56,927 --> 00:59:59,163 Now, this drives me crazy. 1238 00:59:59,163 --> 01:00:02,099 But no--ha ha!-- I don't bite. 1239 01:00:04,935 --> 01:00:07,137 We meet at our palace-- 1240 01:00:07,137 --> 01:00:09,640 this palace that I built on the beach. 1241 01:00:09,640 --> 01:00:12,109 And I know that this is the night-- 1242 01:00:12,109 --> 01:00:16,080 that it's got to be the big confrontation. 1243 01:00:16,080 --> 01:00:18,048 She wants it... 1244 01:00:18,048 --> 01:00:21,919 She's like a nymphomaniac in heat, if that's possible. 1245 01:00:21,919 --> 01:00:24,021 That's the way she is. 1246 01:00:24,021 --> 01:00:26,657 I can't do it-- I just can't do it with her. 1247 01:00:26,657 --> 01:00:29,026 No matter how much I want to, I can't-- 1248 01:00:29,026 --> 01:00:32,362 I gotta say no to he, and it drives her crazy. 1249 01:00:32,362 --> 01:00:34,131 She's begging me, she keeps begging me. 1250 01:00:34,131 --> 01:00:36,066 But I won't allow it. 1251 01:00:37,868 --> 01:00:40,838 She keeps pounding on the door, driving me crazy. 1252 01:00:40,838 --> 01:00:43,073 It's like a bad nightmare! 1253 01:00:43,073 --> 01:00:45,943 At this point I want to wake up and I just can't! 1254 01:00:45,943 --> 01:00:47,211 "More! More! More!" she screams... 1255 01:00:47,211 --> 01:00:51,081 More, I need you. I want you" 1256 01:00:51,081 --> 01:00:54,819 But I can't so I go off to be alone with my thoughts. 1257 01:00:54,819 --> 01:00:56,086 I'm alone, I'm alone, I'm alone, 1258 01:00:56,086 --> 01:00:57,855 I'm alone, alone, alone... 1259 01:00:57,855 --> 01:01:02,793 ( Continues ) 1260 01:01:02,793 --> 01:01:05,830 Then I look up, and I'm not alone anymore 1261 01:01:05,830 --> 01:01:08,198 and it's like the cast and crew of The Love Boat 1262 01:01:08,198 --> 01:01:09,700 all lookin' down, laughin' at me! 1263 01:01:09,700 --> 01:01:11,802 They're pointing and laughing, 1264 01:01:11,802 --> 01:01:13,704 and I'm standing there alone, just... 1265 01:01:13,704 --> 01:01:16,406 holding that one little thought in my hand. 1266 01:01:18,475 --> 01:01:21,478 Aaah, I'm so embarrassed, but I smile, 1267 01:01:21,478 --> 01:01:23,848 and I can't do anything! 1268 01:01:23,848 --> 01:01:25,883 And they're still laughing! Oh, it's disgusting! 1269 01:01:28,118 --> 01:01:31,088 Ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha! 1270 01:01:31,088 --> 01:01:32,422 Oh, that's funny! Ha ha ha ha! 1271 01:01:32,422 --> 01:01:36,260 Ha ha ha ha! What's his problem? 1272 01:01:36,260 --> 01:01:37,962 Oh, that's great. Thanks a lot. 1273 01:01:37,962 --> 01:01:39,163 Thank you. 1274 01:01:39,163 --> 01:01:41,131 Thank you very much. That's wonderful. 1275 01:01:41,131 --> 01:01:43,500 What do you make of that, Doctor? 1276 01:01:43,500 --> 01:01:46,036 Well, if you want my professional opinion, 1277 01:01:46,036 --> 01:01:49,139 I think someone has altered his mind. 1278 01:01:49,139 --> 01:01:51,742 Altered his mind? Why do you think that? 1279 01:01:51,742 --> 01:01:54,879 Well, his fear fantasy is too vivid. 1280 01:01:54,879 --> 01:01:56,814 I don't trust that. 1281 01:01:56,814 --> 01:01:59,016 See, I think you've been put under 1282 01:01:59,016 --> 01:02:01,919 some sort of post-hypnotic suggestion. 1283 01:02:01,919 --> 01:02:06,256 Like, you know, the Amazing Kreskin? 1284 01:02:06,256 --> 01:02:08,793 No, it's not as simple as just memorizing 1285 01:02:08,793 --> 01:02:10,828 a few names from the Tonight Show audience. 1286 01:02:10,828 --> 01:02:12,162 I think your friend 1287 01:02:12,162 --> 01:02:14,264 has been put under an actual spell. 1288 01:02:14,264 --> 01:02:16,166 There's only one way to cure that. 1289 01:02:16,166 --> 01:02:18,102 What's that? 1290 01:02:18,102 --> 01:02:20,905 To drop him on his head. Drop me on my-- 1291 01:02:20,905 --> 01:02:22,840 Aaaaah!!! 1292 01:02:25,843 --> 01:02:27,177 I'm gonna drop you! 1293 01:02:27,177 --> 01:02:29,046 Doc, what are you doing? 1294 01:02:29,046 --> 01:02:31,281 This is scare therapy. It's like curing the hiccups. 1295 01:02:31,281 --> 01:02:33,984 You see that Pinto? That's my target. 1296 01:02:33,984 --> 01:02:35,853 Is this gonna work? 1297 01:02:35,853 --> 01:02:38,789 I don't know, but I bet the spell is gone. 1298 01:02:38,789 --> 01:02:40,190 So how do you feel-- nice and refreshed? 1299 01:02:40,190 --> 01:02:42,092 I feel all right. Good, good. 1300 01:02:42,092 --> 01:02:43,861 Now, you talked to her-- what did she say? 1301 01:02:43,861 --> 01:02:45,129 Yeah. I talked to her while you were in the shower. 1302 01:02:45,129 --> 01:02:47,197 She said she was willing to meet you here at the restaurant. 1303 01:02:47,197 --> 01:02:49,233 That's it? What else? 1304 01:02:49,233 --> 01:02:51,335 Look, you're lucky you got that much out of her. 1305 01:02:51,335 --> 01:02:53,303 Now, what are you gonna say to her? 1306 01:02:53,303 --> 01:02:54,972 I'm gonna take your advice. 1307 01:02:54,972 --> 01:02:56,974 I'm gonna sit her down, look her right in the eyes, 1308 01:02:56,974 --> 01:02:58,976 and lie my ass off. 1309 01:02:58,976 --> 01:03:00,277 Always works, Johnny. 1310 01:03:04,214 --> 01:03:05,883 There she is. 1311 01:03:05,883 --> 01:03:07,284 All right, let's go. 1312 01:03:07,284 --> 01:03:09,086 No, she looks pissed. I'm gonna have a drink. 1313 01:03:09,086 --> 01:03:10,187 Me, too. I'll have-- 1314 01:03:10,187 --> 01:03:12,089 Get over there! 1315 01:03:12,089 --> 01:03:14,024 Why, Nance! 1316 01:03:14,024 --> 01:03:15,225 ( Chuckling ) 1317 01:03:15,225 --> 01:03:16,894 Mind if I sit here? 1318 01:03:18,829 --> 01:03:19,930 Thank you. 1319 01:03:22,232 --> 01:03:24,234 So... 1320 01:03:24,234 --> 01:03:26,603 so... 1321 01:03:26,603 --> 01:03:29,840 I have never been so embarrassed in my entire life. 1322 01:03:29,840 --> 01:03:33,210 Well, why don't we leave? We don't have to stay here. 1323 01:03:33,210 --> 01:03:34,845 You don't like it? I don't like it, either. 1324 01:03:34,845 --> 01:03:36,180 I don't even know why I'm bothering 1325 01:03:36,180 --> 01:03:37,882 to stay here and talk to you. 1326 01:03:37,882 --> 01:03:40,017 Hey, gimme a break, will ya? Let me explain. 1327 01:03:40,017 --> 01:03:41,852 Give me a chance. 1328 01:03:41,852 --> 01:03:43,220 Five minutes, that's all I want. 1329 01:03:43,220 --> 01:03:44,955 All right? Um-hmm. 1330 01:03:44,955 --> 01:03:46,924 Okay. 1331 01:03:46,924 --> 01:03:49,026 You see... 1332 01:03:49,026 --> 01:03:52,196 I--I think I've really-- 1333 01:03:52,196 --> 01:03:55,199 I don't have any control over myself anymore. 1334 01:03:55,199 --> 01:03:58,602 Ho! You can say that again! 1335 01:03:58,602 --> 01:04:01,138 My father wants to kill you, John. 1336 01:04:01,138 --> 01:04:03,273 Sure. You're frightening! 1337 01:04:03,273 --> 01:04:05,142 I don't even know who you are anymore. 1338 01:04:05,142 --> 01:04:08,145 Neither do I. Neither do I, Nancy, 1339 01:04:08,145 --> 01:04:10,214 and that's why I went to a psychiatrist. 1340 01:04:10,214 --> 01:04:12,082 You did? 1341 01:04:12,082 --> 01:04:13,383 I didn't want to tell you, 1342 01:04:13,383 --> 01:04:15,119 but yes, I went to a psychiatrist. 1343 01:04:15,119 --> 01:04:17,321 What did he say? 1344 01:04:17,321 --> 01:04:20,257 What did he-- he said that... 1345 01:04:20,257 --> 01:04:22,326 I'm, uh... 1346 01:04:22,326 --> 01:04:24,061 I developed a brain virus. 1347 01:04:26,396 --> 01:04:28,432 You mean, you're sick? 1348 01:04:28,432 --> 01:04:30,400 Crazy kind of sick, or...? 1349 01:04:30,400 --> 01:04:34,071 It's more along the lines of a 24-hour brain virus, 1350 01:04:34,071 --> 01:04:36,406 something that can affect your brain. 1351 01:04:36,406 --> 01:04:38,408 Much the same-- 1352 01:04:38,408 --> 01:04:41,045 much like diarrhea of the brain, 1353 01:04:41,045 --> 01:04:43,680 in that the gray matter kind of runs a little bit 1354 01:04:43,680 --> 01:04:45,983 and mixes with the other. 1355 01:04:45,983 --> 01:04:47,918 It's just a passing thing 1356 01:04:47,918 --> 01:04:49,987 that he said that if I got a lot rest 1357 01:04:49,987 --> 01:04:52,022 and took a lot of vitamin C-- 1358 01:04:52,022 --> 01:04:55,125 which I thought strange, but vitamin C is very good-- 1359 01:04:55,125 --> 01:04:58,695 and the love of a good woman-- and those were his exact words. 1360 01:04:58,695 --> 01:05:02,199 I know it sounds like a John Wayne movie, but that's-- 1361 01:05:02,199 --> 01:05:03,968 the love of a good woman. 1362 01:05:03,968 --> 01:05:06,370 What do we do now? 1363 01:05:06,370 --> 01:05:09,339 Well, I guess we could get married, but I-- 1364 01:05:09,339 --> 01:05:12,709 would like to, but I know you wouldn't want to do it. 1365 01:05:12,709 --> 01:05:15,379 Who says I wouldn't want to do it? 1366 01:05:15,379 --> 01:05:18,082 Oh, come on, don't-- let's just drop it. 1367 01:05:18,082 --> 01:05:20,117 Don't grovel. 1368 01:05:20,117 --> 01:05:21,952 Well, I gave it a shot, I gave it a very good shot. 1369 01:05:21,952 --> 01:05:24,221 It worked. Where did I get you? 1370 01:05:24,221 --> 01:05:26,390 The virus? I was reachin'. Thank you. 1371 01:05:36,366 --> 01:05:39,236 Oh, yeah, I'm in love! 1372 01:05:39,236 --> 01:05:41,371 Ooh-la-la-la-la-la-la! 1373 01:05:41,371 --> 01:05:44,141 Ooh, you have a very nice ass! 1374 01:05:44,141 --> 01:05:46,743 Ha ha ha ha ha! I'm gonna bite it! 1375 01:05:46,743 --> 01:05:48,478 John, what are you doing?! 1376 01:05:48,478 --> 01:05:50,747 Don't do this to me, John. 1377 01:05:50,747 --> 01:05:52,682 I'm not gonna do this to you. 1378 01:05:52,682 --> 01:05:54,751 You relax me, baby. 1379 01:05:54,751 --> 01:05:57,454 You soothe my soul, my savage soul. 1380 01:05:57,454 --> 01:06:00,090 What we have between us is special. 1381 01:06:00,090 --> 01:06:03,493 It's magic... it's big magic. 1382 01:06:03,493 --> 01:06:06,396 It's showtime! Yeah! 1383 01:06:06,396 --> 01:06:08,465 All right, showtime, ladies and gentlemen! 1384 01:06:10,000 --> 01:06:10,634 Don't! 1385 01:06:12,436 --> 01:06:14,338 Did you think I was gonna do that? 1386 01:06:14,338 --> 01:06:16,273 Ha ha ha ha! 1387 01:06:16,273 --> 01:06:18,042 Let's mambo! 1388 01:06:18,042 --> 01:06:20,244 * Dun-dun-dun, dun-dun-dun-dun-dun * 1389 01:06:20,244 --> 01:06:22,512 ( Singing and yelling ) 1390 01:06:22,512 --> 01:06:24,781 John! Are you all right? 1391 01:06:24,781 --> 01:06:26,416 I'm fine. Take a bow! 1392 01:06:26,416 --> 01:06:28,218 Oooh! Ha ha ha ha! 1393 01:06:28,218 --> 01:06:31,155 Yeah, I'm an ass, and I'm lovin' it! 1394 01:06:31,155 --> 01:06:33,490 * Brazil... 1395 01:06:33,490 --> 01:06:35,525 Hey, let's mambo! Thank you very much. 1396 01:06:35,525 --> 01:06:37,294 Okay, fellas, take five. 1397 01:06:37,294 --> 01:06:39,529 Can we have a little light here, please? 1398 01:06:39,529 --> 01:06:41,131 Thank you very much. 1399 01:06:42,532 --> 01:06:44,434 Oh, that feels nice. 1400 01:06:44,434 --> 01:06:46,303 Doesn't that feel nice? 1401 01:06:46,303 --> 01:06:48,805 It's incredible what light will do to ya, 1402 01:06:48,805 --> 01:06:51,075 it just changes the whole mood. 1403 01:06:51,075 --> 01:06:53,210 I feel like singin'... I feel like singin'. 1404 01:06:53,210 --> 01:06:54,811 I hope you folks don't mind. 1405 01:06:54,811 --> 01:06:57,447 This next song is dedicated... 1406 01:06:57,447 --> 01:07:00,217 well, to you, honey, my fiance. 1407 01:07:00,217 --> 01:07:02,086 She's wonderful. 1408 01:07:02,086 --> 01:07:04,321 This is her right here. The one with the blue eyes 1409 01:07:04,321 --> 01:07:06,323 and the soft blond hair. 1410 01:07:06,323 --> 01:07:07,824 A wonderful lady. 1411 01:07:07,824 --> 01:07:10,227 The greatest lady in bed you'll ever wanna meet. 1412 01:07:10,227 --> 01:07:12,262 She's amazing, I mean... 1413 01:07:12,262 --> 01:07:14,331 I mean this. 1414 01:07:14,331 --> 01:07:15,832 The things that she could do with her mouth-- 1415 01:07:15,832 --> 01:07:18,068 Whoo. 1416 01:07:18,068 --> 01:07:20,137 It's just--It's incredible. 1417 01:07:20,137 --> 01:07:22,339 She knows so many sexual positions, 1418 01:07:22,339 --> 01:07:25,075 I'm dumbfounded half the time, and I mean that, honey. 1419 01:07:25,075 --> 01:07:26,576 I really do. You're incredible. 1420 01:07:26,576 --> 01:07:28,845 The best lay I ever had. 1421 01:07:28,845 --> 01:07:32,316 I would put her up against anybody in this room right now. 1422 01:07:32,316 --> 01:07:35,119 She'll wear you down. She'll wear you right down. 1423 01:07:35,119 --> 01:07:37,187 She just grinds-- grinds you to death. 1424 01:07:37,187 --> 01:07:38,588 I mean--ooh. 1425 01:07:38,588 --> 01:07:41,158 You know, all day. I'ts all day with her. 1426 01:07:41,158 --> 01:07:42,492 She's non-stop. She can't get enough, 1427 01:07:42,492 --> 01:07:44,361 and I respect that, 1428 01:07:44,361 --> 01:07:46,230 and I love you. 1429 01:07:46,230 --> 01:07:47,331 And this song goes out to you, honey. 1430 01:07:47,331 --> 01:07:48,865 It's entitled... 1431 01:07:48,865 --> 01:07:53,370 Me and My Dick. 1432 01:07:53,370 --> 01:07:56,873 To help me out, 'cause this is a special song. 1433 01:07:56,873 --> 01:08:00,210 I'm gonna sing with my doll, from my heart... 1434 01:08:00,210 --> 01:08:01,478 for you, honey. 1435 01:08:03,380 --> 01:08:05,615 I love you. I mean that. 1436 01:08:05,615 --> 01:08:10,820 Drum roll, please. ( Drumm roll ) 1437 01:08:10,820 --> 01:08:12,522 I'm trying to understand, John. 1438 01:08:12,522 --> 01:08:14,391 I guess it's like what Dr. Ted said. 1439 01:08:14,391 --> 01:08:16,160 Somebody must have put me in a spell, 1440 01:08:16,160 --> 01:08:18,328 and I've been walkin' around in this voodoo-like trance. 1441 01:08:18,328 --> 01:08:20,464 You were definitely in a trance at that wedding rehearsal. 1442 01:08:20,464 --> 01:08:23,467 I know. I don't normally act that way. 1443 01:08:23,467 --> 01:08:26,136 I thank you guys for stickin' with me. 1444 01:08:26,136 --> 01:08:28,238 Hey, anything to get the old Johnny back, huh? 1445 01:08:28,238 --> 01:08:30,474 I'm gonna get the limo. I'll meet you on the corner. 1446 01:08:33,310 --> 01:08:35,145 You know, I love you, Nance. 1447 01:08:35,145 --> 01:08:36,480 I know you do. 1448 01:08:36,480 --> 01:08:38,848 Everything's gonna be okay. 1449 01:08:43,253 --> 01:08:44,588 ( Starts car ) 1450 01:09:31,501 --> 01:09:35,939 ANGELA: I want you to open your eyes, John. 1451 01:09:35,939 --> 01:09:37,607 This hypnotism isn't gonna work. 1452 01:09:37,607 --> 01:09:39,309 All it does is make him act like a jerk. 1453 01:09:39,309 --> 01:09:40,477 He's not gonna kill anyone. 1454 01:09:40,477 --> 01:09:42,312 Yes, it will work. 1455 01:09:42,312 --> 01:09:44,981 His respect for the institution of fatherhood was too strong, 1456 01:09:44,981 --> 01:09:46,616 it caused a mental block. 1457 01:09:46,616 --> 01:09:48,918 Once we destroy that respect, 1458 01:09:48,918 --> 01:09:51,255 he'll be exactly what we want him to be. 1459 01:09:51,255 --> 01:09:53,723 SUN YI: Who's that imbecile out there? That's his friend. 1460 01:09:53,723 --> 01:09:55,592 Make him one with the ocean. 1461 01:09:55,592 --> 01:09:56,660 Let him sleep with the fishes. 1462 01:09:56,660 --> 01:09:58,462 You know, John, 1463 01:09:58,462 --> 01:10:01,331 a lot of bad people are out there trying to get you. 1464 01:10:01,331 --> 01:10:02,632 Really? 1465 01:10:02,632 --> 01:10:04,601 That's why we had to bring you here. 1466 01:10:04,601 --> 01:10:06,503 We wanted to make sure you'd be safe. 1467 01:10:06,503 --> 01:10:08,305 That's very kind of you. 1468 01:10:08,305 --> 01:10:11,675 One of those bad people is your future father-in-law. 1469 01:10:11,675 --> 01:10:14,444 I'm looking for John, I wonder if you saw him. 1470 01:10:14,444 --> 01:10:16,446 He's about this tall, 1471 01:10:16,446 --> 01:10:18,515 light-colored hair, 1472 01:10:18,515 --> 01:10:20,784 round...face, 1473 01:10:20,784 --> 01:10:23,353 kinda good-natured, good-natured guy, 1474 01:10:23,353 --> 01:10:26,490 kinda ( Goofy laugh )... laughs like that. 1475 01:10:26,490 --> 01:10:29,025 I think he was with a couple of gentlemen-- 1476 01:10:29,025 --> 01:10:31,428 Let's go! And no trouble! 1477 01:10:31,428 --> 01:10:33,563 Fathers are the root of it all, John. 1478 01:10:33,563 --> 01:10:35,732 I have a great respect for the institution of fatherhood. 1479 01:10:35,732 --> 01:10:37,701 Do you see? 1480 01:10:37,701 --> 01:10:40,337 Fathers are bad, John, 1481 01:10:40,337 --> 01:10:42,739 and they must be stopped at all costs. 1482 01:10:42,739 --> 01:10:44,708 Think of all the damage they've done. 1483 01:10:44,708 --> 01:10:46,810 You know, John, 1484 01:10:46,810 --> 01:10:49,379 throughout history, 1485 01:10:49,379 --> 01:10:50,814 it was the father 1486 01:10:50,814 --> 01:10:53,283 who was the cause of a the trouble. 1487 01:10:57,587 --> 01:10:59,289 Hi, honey, I'm home! 1488 01:11:00,424 --> 01:11:02,359 Hello, dear. 1489 01:11:02,359 --> 01:11:04,428 Ha ha ha! Where's Princess? 1490 01:11:04,428 --> 01:11:05,829 There she is! 1491 01:11:05,829 --> 01:11:08,765 Hi, Dad! Hi, Princess! 1492 01:11:10,534 --> 01:11:12,001 Ha ha ha! 1493 01:11:12,001 --> 01:11:14,571 And where's my Kitten? She's upstairs. 1494 01:11:14,571 --> 01:11:17,474 Hi, Daddy! Hi, Kitten! 1495 01:11:17,474 --> 01:11:20,577 Why don't you just slide down the banister? 1496 01:11:20,577 --> 01:11:22,746 You know Daddy will always be here to catch you. 1497 01:11:22,746 --> 01:11:24,714 Here I come! Wheeeee! 1498 01:11:30,620 --> 01:11:33,490 Another cup, dear? 1499 01:11:33,490 --> 01:11:35,425 No! This coffee sucks! 1500 01:11:38,695 --> 01:11:41,765 Maybe it's the caffeine that makes you so irritable. 1501 01:11:41,765 --> 01:11:44,334 I'm not irritable, goddammit! 1502 01:11:44,334 --> 01:11:46,336 I'm an insurance salesman-- 1503 01:11:46,336 --> 01:11:49,072 insurance salesmen never get irritable, Margaret! 1504 01:11:49,072 --> 01:11:51,475 Anything you say, dear. 1505 01:11:51,475 --> 01:11:53,377 Hee hee hee! 1506 01:11:53,377 --> 01:11:55,745 Where's Bud, that gearhead son of mine? 1507 01:11:55,745 --> 01:11:58,114 You locked him in the shed for a week. 1508 01:11:58,114 --> 01:11:59,816 Don't you remember, dear? 1509 01:11:59,816 --> 01:12:01,551 Ho ho! Oh, yeah. 1510 01:12:01,551 --> 01:12:03,620 Hi, Father! Hi, Princess. 1511 01:12:03,620 --> 01:12:05,855 Father, a very nice young man asked me 1512 01:12:05,855 --> 01:12:08,124 to the ROTC ball next Friday. 1513 01:12:08,124 --> 01:12:09,526 Can I go? 1514 01:12:09,526 --> 01:12:11,361 No. 1515 01:12:11,361 --> 01:12:14,464 But why not? He's perfectly acceptable. 1516 01:12:14,464 --> 01:12:16,566 And a lot of my friends are going. 1517 01:12:16,566 --> 01:12:18,535 I said no. 1518 01:12:18,535 --> 01:12:21,070 Friday is Punishment Night, Princess. 1519 01:12:21,070 --> 01:12:22,338 Father, I really want to go. 1520 01:12:22,338 --> 01:12:24,574 Maybe you'd like to talk about this in the den. 1521 01:12:24,574 --> 01:12:25,909 Please, Father-- 1522 01:12:25,909 --> 01:12:28,778 Let's talk about it. Let's have a little chat. 1523 01:12:28,778 --> 01:12:30,780 No! No!!! Come on, Princess! 1524 01:12:32,148 --> 01:12:33,850 Margaret, you're next! 1525 01:12:35,519 --> 01:12:37,854 Hi, Mrs. Anderson. Hi, Mr. Anderson. 1526 01:12:37,854 --> 01:12:40,490 Do you think I could hide out here for a while? 1527 01:12:40,490 --> 01:12:42,459 Beaver, what's wrong? You're covered with blood! 1528 01:12:42,459 --> 01:12:44,561 Yeah, I know. It's Wally's blood. 1529 01:12:44,561 --> 01:12:46,763 See, Wally and I were fixin' his bike in the driveway, 1530 01:12:46,763 --> 01:12:48,532 and Dad came home and got real mad. 1531 01:12:48,532 --> 01:12:50,467 So he took a gun out and killed Wally-- 1532 01:12:50,467 --> 01:12:52,469 blew his head clean off his shoulders. 1533 01:12:52,469 --> 01:12:54,904 His face is all over the garage door-- it's a real mess. 1534 01:12:54,904 --> 01:12:57,106 FATHER: Well, maybe your dad knows what he's doing. 1535 01:12:57,106 --> 01:12:58,808 I don't think so. I think he flipped out. 1536 01:12:58,808 --> 01:13:01,911 Margaret, call up Ward-- tell him Beaver's here. 1537 01:13:01,911 --> 01:13:03,613 Don't do that, Mr. Anderson. 1538 01:13:03,613 --> 01:13:05,682 Please, Mrs. Anderson, don't do that. 1539 01:13:05,682 --> 01:13:07,584 I think it's time you had your punishment, Beaver! 1540 01:13:07,584 --> 01:13:08,785 No, Mr. Anderson, no! 1541 01:13:08,785 --> 01:13:11,588 No! No! No! 1542 01:13:11,588 --> 01:13:14,558 No! No! No! 1543 01:13:14,558 --> 01:13:16,693 No! Don't do that to the Beaver! 1544 01:13:16,693 --> 01:13:18,495 You can't do it to Beaver! 1545 01:13:18,495 --> 01:13:21,431 I hate you, Ward! I hate Jim Anderson! 1546 01:13:21,431 --> 01:13:23,700 I hate Ed Reese! 1547 01:13:23,700 --> 01:13:25,602 Good, John. 1548 01:13:25,602 --> 01:13:28,705 Now, when you hear the minister say, 1549 01:13:28,705 --> 01:13:32,141 "With this ring, I thee wed," 1550 01:13:32,141 --> 01:13:35,779 you will take out your gun, 1551 01:13:35,779 --> 01:13:38,147 point it at Ed Reese, 1552 01:13:38,147 --> 01:13:41,585 and squeeze the trigger. 1553 01:13:41,585 --> 01:13:43,553 ( Church bell ringing ) 1554 01:13:45,655 --> 01:13:48,858 Hey, hey, hey! It's the father of the bride. 1555 01:13:48,858 --> 01:13:51,495 So nice to see you again, Congressman. 1556 01:13:51,495 --> 01:13:53,730 Couldn't have asked for nicer weather, huh? 1557 01:13:53,730 --> 01:13:56,733 Listen, we both know why you're here, 1558 01:13:56,733 --> 01:13:59,936 you low-life, scumbag, son-of-a-bitch. 1559 01:13:59,936 --> 01:14:01,871 Jim! Good to see you. 1560 01:14:01,871 --> 01:14:04,207 Just don't press your luck. 1561 01:14:04,207 --> 01:14:06,976 Don't ever try to talk to me again, ya hear? 1562 01:14:06,976 --> 01:14:09,245 Oh, ho! Hey! Ha ha! 1563 01:14:09,245 --> 01:14:11,515 That's wonderful, that's great! 1564 01:14:11,515 --> 01:14:13,683 What a thing. Marvelous sense of humor. 1565 01:14:23,960 --> 01:14:25,995 Nice and low. 1566 01:14:25,995 --> 01:14:28,565 Bobby, let's get the majesty of this damn thing. 1567 01:14:28,565 --> 01:14:30,800 Yeah, just kind of pan around. 1568 01:14:30,800 --> 01:14:32,902 Just move! Move! 1569 01:14:32,902 --> 01:14:35,505 What are you lookin' at?! 1570 01:14:35,505 --> 01:14:37,006 I'm not here, just do your thing! It's a wedding. 1571 01:14:37,006 --> 01:14:38,708 Friends of the bride on this side, 1572 01:14:38,708 --> 01:14:39,909 friends of the groom on this side. 1573 01:14:39,909 --> 01:14:40,944 Groom. 1574 01:14:43,613 --> 01:14:45,782 Don't look at me! Just keep walking. 1575 01:14:45,782 --> 01:14:47,884 Can we get the black guy? 1576 01:14:47,884 --> 01:14:49,786 Can you get in here, 1577 01:14:49,786 --> 01:14:51,287 'cause that's very important for the congressman, 1578 01:14:51,287 --> 01:14:52,822 we need some black people in this. That's nice. 1579 01:14:54,624 --> 01:14:57,026 Hi. So far, so good, huh? 1580 01:14:57,026 --> 01:14:59,295 Hold your tongue. The hardest part is still to come. 1581 01:14:59,295 --> 01:15:00,830 Where is the leader? 1582 01:15:00,830 --> 01:15:02,666 He's around--somewhere. 1583 01:15:02,666 --> 01:15:05,802 Watching like a cat on the prowl, 1584 01:15:05,802 --> 01:15:08,538 stalking his prey, making every movement count. 1585 01:15:08,538 --> 01:15:10,574 Shouldn't we go? Yes. 1586 01:15:15,812 --> 01:15:17,547 Keep moving. 1587 01:15:20,316 --> 01:15:21,818 I was a little hungry. 1588 01:15:23,687 --> 01:15:25,822 It's good. It's a good thing to be hungry. 1589 01:15:25,822 --> 01:15:27,557 It's allowed. 1590 01:15:27,557 --> 01:15:29,058 I saw Patty. 1591 01:15:29,058 --> 01:15:31,561 You did a good job with her, she looks very fine. 1592 01:15:31,561 --> 01:15:33,897 I hope the spell lasts. 1593 01:15:33,897 --> 01:15:36,700 It's been known to wear off under pressure. 1594 01:15:36,700 --> 01:15:39,969 Negative thoughts... no negative thoughts. 1595 01:15:39,969 --> 01:15:41,671 Circulate. 1596 01:15:41,671 --> 01:15:42,972 SAL: That's good, just--just... 1597 01:15:42,972 --> 01:15:44,340 That's good. 1598 01:15:44,340 --> 01:15:45,975 This is--that's good. 1599 01:15:45,975 --> 01:15:47,977 No problem, keep movin'. This is a low angle, 1600 01:15:47,977 --> 01:15:49,345 that's all right, makin' a fillum. 1601 01:15:49,345 --> 01:15:50,914 This is beautiful 1602 01:15:50,914 --> 01:15:53,617 That's it, just keep walkin' up, 1603 01:15:53,617 --> 01:15:55,652 that's fine, that's good. 1604 01:15:55,652 --> 01:15:57,553 Makin' magic down here. Looks fabulous. 1605 01:16:41,030 --> 01:16:43,700 Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today-- 1606 01:16:43,700 --> 01:16:44,701 Action!!! 1607 01:16:47,036 --> 01:16:51,741 Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today... 1608 01:16:51,741 --> 01:16:55,011 In a matter of moments, a union will take place 1609 01:16:55,011 --> 01:16:58,047 within these hallowed walls. 1610 01:16:58,047 --> 01:17:02,719 A union between a man and a woman-- 1611 01:17:02,719 --> 01:17:05,822 who just happens to be the daughter of a guy 1612 01:17:05,822 --> 01:17:08,692 that could be the next President of the United States. 1613 01:17:09,793 --> 01:17:12,061 I'm Sal DiPasquale, 1614 01:17:12,061 --> 01:17:14,698 and this is my fillum-- 1615 01:17:14,698 --> 01:17:17,967 John and Nancy... 1616 01:17:17,967 --> 01:17:19,703 The Wedding. 1617 01:17:24,407 --> 01:17:26,876 Okay, Bobby, you can zoom in now. 1618 01:17:28,144 --> 01:17:29,879 That was great, Mr. Dip-- 1619 01:17:29,879 --> 01:17:31,781 Get outta the way!!! 1620 01:17:34,818 --> 01:17:36,986 And now, John, your vows. 1621 01:17:39,889 --> 01:17:41,691 John? 1622 01:17:43,727 --> 01:17:46,963 Well, I guess Nancy's vows 1623 01:17:46,963 --> 01:17:49,132 will suffice for both of you. 1624 01:17:49,132 --> 01:17:51,701 And now we'll continue with the ceremony. 1625 01:17:51,701 --> 01:17:54,871 If anyone here knows of any reason 1626 01:17:54,871 --> 01:17:59,108 why this couple should not be bound in holy matrimony, 1627 01:17:59,108 --> 01:18:02,746 let him speak now or forever hold his peace. 1628 01:18:03,980 --> 01:18:06,916 ( Shopping cart wheels squeaking ) 1629 01:18:09,719 --> 01:18:13,022 Do you, Nancy, Wilhelmina Reese... 1630 01:18:13,022 --> 01:18:14,991 ( Squeaking continues ) 1631 01:18:25,168 --> 01:18:30,173 Do you, Nancy Wilhelmina Reese, 1632 01:18:30,173 --> 01:18:34,811 take this man, John Franklin Bourgignon, 1633 01:18:34,811 --> 01:18:37,947 to be your lawful wedded husband, 1634 01:18:37,947 --> 01:18:42,151 to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, 1635 01:18:42,151 --> 01:18:44,954 from this day forward? 1636 01:18:44,954 --> 01:18:46,923 I do. 1637 01:18:46,923 --> 01:18:50,827 Do you, John Franklin Bourgignon, 1638 01:18:50,827 --> 01:18:53,863 take this woman, Nancy Wilhelmina Reese, 1639 01:18:53,863 --> 01:18:57,000 to be your lawful wedded wife, 1640 01:18:57,000 --> 01:19:00,203 to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, 1641 01:19:00,203 --> 01:19:03,072 from this day forward? 1642 01:19:04,207 --> 01:19:05,809 Yeah. 1643 01:19:12,048 --> 01:19:13,516 With this ring 1644 01:19:13,516 --> 01:19:15,819 I thee wed. 1645 01:19:20,256 --> 01:19:21,825 Aaaah!!! 1646 01:19:27,063 --> 01:19:29,165 Chick, it's all right, I know what I'm doin'! 1647 01:19:29,165 --> 01:19:30,066 Sal, stop those guys! 1648 01:19:31,200 --> 01:19:32,836 Block the aisles! 1649 01:19:32,836 --> 01:19:34,003 ANGELA: Get out of the way! 1650 01:19:35,839 --> 01:19:37,106 We're in a church! 1651 01:19:38,341 --> 01:19:39,809 Chick, are you all right? 1652 01:19:39,809 --> 01:19:41,144 Yeah, I'm fine. How about you? 1653 01:19:41,144 --> 01:19:43,880 I'm not hypnotized. They wanted me to kill Ed Reese! 1654 01:19:43,880 --> 01:19:46,215 Yeah, I know. Look, what happened? 1655 01:19:46,215 --> 01:19:48,551 Ah, they made me watch some phony Father Knows Best film. 1656 01:19:48,551 --> 01:19:51,988 I know TV--Jim Anderson would never choke the Beaver. 1657 01:19:51,988 --> 01:19:54,590 Johnny! Are you all right, Nance? 1658 01:19:54,590 --> 01:19:56,092 You just saved Daddy's life! 1659 01:19:56,092 --> 01:19:58,962 Will somebody please tell me what's going on? 1660 01:19:58,962 --> 01:20:01,297 Daddy, Johnny just saved your life! 1661 01:20:01,297 --> 01:20:04,133 Well, you know... Dad, you owe me one. 1662 01:20:04,133 --> 01:20:05,234 Ha ha ha ha ha! 1663 01:20:05,234 --> 01:20:07,904 Oh, my God. 1664 01:20:26,089 --> 01:20:28,157 Well, was I right, or was I right? 1665 01:20:28,157 --> 01:20:30,193 I told you this was gonna be an incredible story, 1666 01:20:30,193 --> 01:20:31,861 and it was. 1667 01:20:31,861 --> 01:20:33,596 Can you believe the way things work out? 1668 01:20:33,596 --> 01:20:35,264 Sal and Ed Reese are partners! 1669 01:20:35,264 --> 01:20:36,866 ( Muttering in disbelief ) 1670 01:20:36,866 --> 01:20:38,935 All right, it's a hot day out here. 1671 01:20:38,935 --> 01:20:40,870 Let's get it right the first time, awright? 1672 01:20:40,870 --> 01:20:43,572 Ready? One, two, three, four! 1673 01:20:43,572 --> 01:20:45,641 * Bom-ba-ba-bom, ba-bom-ba-bom-bom * 1674 01:20:45,641 --> 01:20:47,176 * Bom-ba-ba-bom, ba-dang-ga-dang-dang * 1675 01:20:47,176 --> 01:20:48,945 * Ga-ding-a-dong-ding 1676 01:20:48,945 --> 01:20:50,346 * Blue moon, moon, blue moon * 1677 01:20:50,346 --> 01:20:52,415 * Do-do-do-do-do Loosen up! 1678 01:20:52,415 --> 01:20:54,583 * Blue moon, moon, blue moon * Smile! 1679 01:20:54,583 --> 01:20:58,154 * Blue moon, moon, blue moon * 1680 01:20:58,154 --> 01:20:59,422 * Dit-da-da-da-dit 1681 01:20:59,422 --> 01:21:01,024 * Bom-ba-ba-bom, ba-bom-ba-bom-bom * 1682 01:21:01,024 --> 01:21:02,892 * Bom-ba-ba-bom, ba-dang-ga-dang-dang * 1683 01:21:02,892 --> 01:21:04,293 * Ga-ding-a-dong-ding 1684 01:21:04,293 --> 01:21:06,595 * Blue moon * Blue moon, moon, blue moon 1685 01:21:06,595 --> 01:21:08,932 * You saw me standing alone * Good! 1686 01:21:08,932 --> 01:21:13,302 * Without a dream in my heart * 1687 01:21:13,302 --> 01:21:15,071 * Without a love of my own * 1688 01:21:15,071 --> 01:21:17,173 * Bom-ba-ba-bom, ba-bom-ba-bom-bom * 1689 01:21:17,173 --> 01:21:18,174 * Bom-ba-ba-bom, ba-dang-ga-dang-dang * Just go with it! 1690 01:21:18,174 --> 01:21:19,608 * Ga-ding-a-dong-ding 1691 01:21:19,608 --> 01:21:22,011 * Blue moon, moon, blue moon * * Oh 1692 01:21:22,011 --> 01:21:25,281 * Blue moon, moon, blue moon * * Oh 1693 01:21:25,281 --> 01:21:27,683 I tell you one thing, I'm happy to have you here. 1694 01:21:27,683 --> 01:21:29,618 Hey, man, you know, 1695 01:21:29,618 --> 01:21:31,354 you oughta try some skin softener or somethin'. 1696 01:21:31,354 --> 01:21:32,922 That stuff look real hard, 1697 01:21:32,922 --> 01:21:34,190 you oughta take care of it. 1698 01:21:34,190 --> 01:21:36,125 One thing I wanna talk to you about, though. 1699 01:21:36,125 --> 01:21:38,061 * Blue moon Now that the noodle factory is a success, 1700 01:21:38,061 --> 01:21:40,964 and after all, I am the Pasta King, 1701 01:21:40,964 --> 01:21:42,265 I think we oughta try to diversify. 1702 01:21:42,265 --> 01:21:43,432 What I think we oughta do 1703 01:21:43,432 --> 01:21:45,634 is get into animal noodles. 1704 01:21:45,634 --> 01:21:47,403 We oughta make little dog noodles 1705 01:21:47,403 --> 01:21:49,072 and little cat noodles, 1706 01:21:49,072 --> 01:21:51,640 little lion and little tiger noodles, 1707 01:21:51,640 --> 01:21:54,077 elephant noodles-- the kids'll love it! 1708 01:21:54,077 --> 01:21:56,212 And that's my plan, ya see? 1709 01:21:56,212 --> 01:21:58,281 I'll get all the kids goin' in the supermarkets, 1710 01:21:58,281 --> 01:22:00,950 and they'll be buyin' Wallissimo Jeffersoni Noodles, 1711 01:22:00,950 --> 01:22:02,718 and we will make a fortune! 1712 01:22:02,718 --> 01:22:05,154 Which reminds me-- guess who I saw on 33rd and 3rd the other day? 1713 01:22:05,154 --> 01:22:07,490 Leffkowitz! You remember Leffkowitz. 1714 01:22:07,490 --> 01:22:09,325 He a lawyer now. 1715 01:22:09,325 --> 01:22:11,360 Did it at home, too-- correspondence course. 1716 01:22:11,360 --> 01:22:13,997 That boy was always smart. 1717 01:22:13,997 --> 01:22:16,665 He handles all my affairs now, takes care of me legally. 1718 01:22:16,665 --> 01:22:18,367 Matter of fact, 1719 01:22:18,367 --> 01:22:21,437 I might say that Leffkowitz is directly responsible 1720 01:22:21,437 --> 01:22:23,339 for the condition I'm in today. 1721 01:22:23,339 --> 01:22:26,209 Two weeks ago we did my will, I got it right here, 1722 01:22:26,209 --> 01:22:28,277 he told me to keep it with me at all times, 1723 01:22:28,277 --> 01:22:30,013 y'know, like, just in case. 1724 01:22:30,013 --> 01:22:31,480 Here, lemme read this to ya. 1725 01:22:31,480 --> 01:22:33,116 See, it says right here, 1726 01:22:33,116 --> 01:22:36,419 "I, Wallace A. Jefferson, bein' of sound mind, 1727 01:22:36,419 --> 01:22:38,687 spent all my money." 1728 01:22:38,687 --> 01:22:41,357 Ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ain't that too much? 1729 01:22:41,357 --> 01:22:44,760 Wait'll I tell ya what he said-- "That's wonderful." 1730 01:22:44,760 --> 01:22:46,395 Ha ha ha ha ha! 1731 01:22:46,395 --> 01:22:48,264 Hey, another thing I wanted to talk to you about, 1732 01:22:48,264 --> 01:22:50,099 is about my new idea. 1733 01:22:50,099 --> 01:22:52,035 I call it "Raiders of the Burning Bush." 1734 01:22:52,035 --> 01:22:54,270 You see, all we have to do is find the spot 1735 01:22:54,270 --> 01:22:56,772 where the original Burning Bush went down, 1736 01:22:56,772 --> 01:22:58,774 and then we sell tickets so people can go see it. 1737 01:22:58,774 --> 01:23:00,509 Kinda like the Lost Ark, 1738 01:23:00,509 --> 01:23:02,178 that's what they was gonna do with it, see. 1739 01:23:02,178 --> 01:23:03,779 But I think more people would wanna see the spot 1740 01:23:03,779 --> 01:23:04,880 where the Burning Bush went down. 1741 01:23:04,880 --> 01:23:07,416 I know you might think it sounds kinda far-fetched, 1742 01:23:07,416 --> 01:23:09,785 I know a lotta people probably been lookin' for it, 1743 01:23:09,785 --> 01:23:12,321 but it's hard to find because the bush burned down. 1744 01:23:12,321 --> 01:23:15,191 But you and me, Muhammed, I think we can do it, 1745 01:23:15,191 --> 01:23:17,226 and I bet we can make a fortune, too. 1746 01:23:17,226 --> 01:23:20,063 I know we could make enough to buy me a new convertible 1747 01:23:20,063 --> 01:23:22,265 after that dude stole it from the noodle factory. 1748 01:23:22,265 --> 01:23:24,300 You hired the cat. 1749 01:23:24,300 --> 01:23:26,302 And don't let's us pretend like you didn't hire him, 1750 01:23:26,302 --> 01:23:28,037 because when he came and asked for the job, 1751 01:23:28,037 --> 01:23:29,338 I turned to you and I said, 1752 01:23:29,338 --> 01:23:31,074 "Should we hire him or not?" 1753 01:23:31,074 --> 01:23:32,441 and I gave you the nudge and you gave him the nod. 1754 01:23:32,441 --> 01:23:34,343 So you did hire the cat. 1755 01:23:34,343 --> 01:23:36,479 I never brought this up before, but I'm bringin' it up now. 1756 01:23:36,479 --> 01:23:38,747 So either you go in with me 1757 01:23:38,747 --> 01:23:40,816 on this Raiders of the Burning Bush, 1758 01:23:40,816 --> 01:23:43,252 or I'm gonna have to reconsider our partnership. 1759 01:23:45,154 --> 01:23:47,056 The ice is meltin' in your drink. 1760 01:23:47,056 --> 01:23:50,293 Look here, I buy you the drinks, you sit there-- you waste 'em. 1761 01:23:50,293 --> 01:23:53,462 That's all right, leave it there, I'll drink it myself. 1762 01:23:53,462 --> 01:23:55,831 Only trouble is, every time I drink one, then I gotta go again. 1763 01:23:55,831 --> 01:23:58,101 You never have to go. 1764 01:23:58,101 --> 01:24:00,203 I mean, I have two or three and I'm off to the john. 1765 01:24:00,203 --> 01:24:02,471 Used to be a time when I could hold a whole case. 1766 01:24:02,471 --> 01:24:06,175 Now I have two or three drinks, Boom! I gotta go. 1767 01:24:06,175 --> 01:24:08,344 I guess I must be gettin' older. 1768 01:24:08,344 --> 01:24:11,214 Ain't nothin' I can do about it, though, you can't stop time. 1769 01:24:11,214 --> 01:24:13,282 I mean, you see Time walkin' down the street, 1770 01:24:13,282 --> 01:24:15,851 you say, "Hey, Time, hold it! I wanna rap to you!" 1771 01:24:15,851 --> 01:24:18,321 Time ain't gonna stop for you-- Time waits for no man. 1772 01:24:18,321 --> 01:24:20,556 Time'll tell ya, "Sorry, I got to march on." 117222