Original subtitles

( snoring )

( moans )

GUYS, GUYS, GET UP! COME ON, WE'RE GONNA BE LATE FOR THE CEREMONY!

WHAT? HURRY!

- AUSTIN, YOU CAN'T BE LATE TODAY. - Austin: COME ON!

THIS IS A BIG DEAL!

THE AMERICAN PARENT ASSOCIATION

IS GIVING YOU A TEEN ROLE MODEL AWARD.

YEAH, AND ROLE MODELS ARE ALWAYS ON TIME.

- LET'S GO! - DEZ, HURRY UP! WE'RE GONNA BE LATE!

( scoffs ) OH NO, NO, WE'RE NOT.

I CHANGED THE TIME ON THE CLOCKS

SO THERE WOULD BE NO WAY WE'D OVERSLEEP.

WHAT? WAIT, SO IT'S NOT 10:00?

NOPE, IT'S 4:00 A.M.

YOU'RE WELCOME.

GREAT! NOW I'M WIDE AWAKE.

- THERE'S NO WAY I'LL GET BACK TO SLEEP NOW. - ( Austin sighs )

YEAH, ME EITHER. WE MAY AS WELL HAVE BREAKFAST.

- PBBT! - I CAN'T BELIEVE LAST NIGHT WAS

THE FINAL SHOW OF YOUR TOUR.

YEAH, I'M KINDA SAD. MY FIRST TOUR IS OVER.

IT'S BEEN FUN TRAVELLING AROUND.

WE'VE BEEN TO 23 DIFFERENT STATES.

24 IF YOU COUNT US BEING HERE IN WASHINGTON, D.C.

I DON'T. IT'S NOT A STATE.

NOBODY LIKES A KNOW-IT-ALL, ALLY.

( chuckles ) LOOK, I BOUGHT A HEADBAND IN EVERY SINGLE CITY

SO I WOULDN'T FORGET A THING.

REMEMBER VEGAS?

- ( boys laugh ) - OH, NICE!

I DID THE SAME THING, ONLY I GOT T-SHIRTS IN EVERY CITY.

( laughs ) BUT THEY'RE ALL JUST PLAIN WHITE.

HOW DO YOU KNOW THE DIFFERENCE?

AWW!

AND, ALLY, I HAVE A SURPRISE FOR YOU.

SINCE YOU WEREN'T WITH US FOR MOST OF THE TOUR,

I'VE COLLECTED TEA CUPS FROM EVERY CITY FOR YOU.

( laughs ) THANKS, TRISH. I LOVE THEM.

PRETTY, BUT USELESS.

I BOUGHT A SOUVENIR BOWLING BALL AT EVERY STOP.

( grunts )

PRETTY AND USEFUL.

- ( crashing ) - ( girls screaming )

OH MAN!

ALLY, YOUR TEACUP SCRATCHED MY BOWLING BALL. OH!

- ( girls sigh ) - ( shattering )

( frustrated groan )

( theme music playing )

♪ WHEN THE CROWD WANTS MORE ♪

♪ I BRING ON THE THUNDER ♪

♪ 'CAUSE YOU'VE GOT MY BACK ♪

♪ AND I'M NOT GOING UNDER ♪

♪ YOU'RE MY POINT, YOU'RE MY GUARD ♪

♪ YOU'RE THE PERFECT CHORD ♪

♪ AND I SEE OUR NAMES TOGETHER ON EVERY BILLBOARD ♪

♪ WE'RE HEADED FOR THE TOP, WE'VE GOT IT ON LOCK ♪

♪ WE'LL MAKE 'EM SAY "HEY!" ♪

♪ AND WE'LL KEEP ROCKIN' ♪

♪ OH, THERE'S NO WAY I COULD MAKE IT WITHOUT YA ♪

♪ DO IT WITHOUT YA, BE HERE WITHOUT YA ♪

♪ IT'S NO FUN WHEN YOU'RE DOING IT SOLO ♪

♪ WITH YOU IT'S LIKE, "WHOA," YEAH, AND I KNOW ♪

♪ I OWN THIS DREAM ♪

♪ 'CAUSE I GOT YOU WITH ME ♪

♪ THERE'S NO WAY I COULD MAKE IT WITHOUT YA ♪

♪ DO IT WITHOUT YA, BE HERE WITHOUT YA. ♪

- ( laughter ) - Ally: THAT WAS AWESOME.

- THAT WAS A REALLY NICE CEREMONY. - WHOO! YEAH.

WHO KNEW THAT BEING A TEEN ROLE MODEL

WOULD SCORE ME AN ACTUAL GOLD MEDAL?

( laughs ) OH, I'M SURE IT'S NOT A REAL GOLD MEDAL.

PROBABLY JUST CHOCOLATE COVERED WITH GOLD FOIL.

- ( clinks ) - OW.

OKAY. IT'S REAL.

WHAT'S WITH THE NEGATIVE ENERGY, DEZ?

ARE YOU JEALOUS OF AUSTIN'S AWARD?

PFFT!

COURSE NOT. IT'S JUST SOME STUPID GOLD MEDAL.

BUT CAN I HAVE IT?! I'VE NEVER WON A MEDAL BEFORE.

SORRY, BUD, BUT THIS IS GOING ON MY TROPHY SHELF,

RIGHT NEXT TO MY EMPTY SPOT

FOR MY FIRST RECORD OF THE YEAR AWARD.

GOT A LOT OF EMPTY SPOTS ON MY TROPHY SHELF TOO...

'CAUSE I'VE NEVER WON ANYTHING.

NOW GIVE IT TO ME! ( grunts )

TRISH. YOU'VE BEEN CHECKING YOUR PHONE ALL MORNING.

- WHAT'S UP? - I'M WORKING ON SOMETHING SUPER EXCITING FOR TONIGHT.

I WANT IT TO BE A BIG SURPRISE, SO I'M NOT GONNA SAY ANOTHER WORD.

- ( humphs ) - COOL. I LOVE SURPRISES.

OKAY, IT INVOLVES AUSTIN PERFORMING

FOR A REALLY FAMOUS PERSON

AT A ONCE-IN-LIFETIME EVENT!

WAY TO NOT SAY ANOTHER WORD.

WELL, ALLY WAS BADGERING ME.

SO WHO'S THE FAMOUS PERSON? WHAT'S THE SPECIAL EVENT?

WHAT PART OF "I WANT IT TO BE A BIG SURPRISE" DIDN'T YOU UNDERSTAND?

SO, WHAT DO WE WANNA DO ON OUR LAST DAY IN D.C.?

FUNNY YOU SHOULD ASK.

I'VE PUT TOGETHER AN ITINERARY

- OF REALLY FUN THINGS TO DO. - Austin: PFFT!

THAT FACT THAT YOU USED THE WORD "ITINERARY"

ALREADY MEANS IT'S NOT GONNA BE FUN.

BUT IT WILL BE.

I FOUND A SLEW OF EXCITING OPTIONS:

THE I.R.S. HEADQUARTERS, THE NATIONAL ARCHIVES AND--

GET THIS-- JOHN PHILIP SOUSA'S BIRTH HOUSE.

( chuckles )

THIS IS WHY WE NEVER LET YOU PICK.

- I WANT TO GO SHOPPING. - I WANT TO GO TO A WATER PARK.

OKAY, FINE, WE'LL COMPROMISE.

WE'LL GO TO THE SMITHSONIAN MUSEUM.

HOW IS A MUSEUM A COMPROMISE?

BECAUSE THEY HAVE LOTS OF MOVIE MEMORABILIA FOR YOU GUYS

AND THE MOST COMPREHENSIVE COLLECTION OF FIRST LADY BOBBLEHEADS

FOR COOL KIDS LIKE ME AND TRISH. ( grunts )

WAIT TILL YOU SEE THIS.

( laughs ) IN 1913, FORD INVENTED THE MOVING ASSEMBLY LINE

AND INTRODUCED IT AT HIS DETROIT PLANT.

- OOOH. - ( flatly ) OOOH.

ACTUALLY, MODERN SCHOLARS DON'T BELIEVE FORD INVENTED THE ASSEMBLY LINE.

IT WAS FOUR OF HIS EMPLOYEES. ( laughs )

OOOH!

WELL, DID YOU THINK THIS WAS AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION TIME?

- ( both laugh ) - IT'S NOT.

OOOH!

AND I WILL CONTINUE THE TOUR IF THAT'S OKAY WITH MRS. KNOW-IT-ALL.

( chuckles ) SINCE I'M A SINGLE FEMALE,

TECHNICALLY, I'M A MS. KNOW-IT-ALL.

- OOO-- - AH!

SINCE YOU ARE SO WELL INFORMED,

MAYBE YOU SHOULD BE THE ONE GIVING THE TOURS, HMM?

I'M GOING ON BREAK.

WELL, I HOPE YOU DON'T BREAK ANYTHING

ON YOUR BREAK. OOOH!

( laughs )

NOTHING? ( chuckles ) NOBODY?

WITH THE PONY EXPRESS, IT TOOK 10 DAYS TO GET FROM MISSOURI TO CALIFORNIA.

PONY EXPRESS?

MORE LIKE TURTLE EXPRESS. AM I RIGHT?

( laughs )

AND THAT CORNY JOKE CONCLUDES OUR TOUR.

I'LL TAKE YOUR MONEY NOW. EXACT CHANGE IS APPRECIATED.

I CAN'T BELIEVE PEOPLE ARE PAYING US MONEY FOR THIS TOUR.

OH, NO ONE'S PAYING YOU ANYTHING.

WAIT, IT'S TOO QUIET. WHERE'S DEZ?

OVER BY THAT ANTIQUE STUFF.

AND YOU LEFT HIM THERE ALONE?!

- DEZ! - WHAT? I DIDN'T TOUCH ANYTHING.

I COULDN'T. TRISH HANDCUFFED MY HANDS TO MY PANTS.

DON'T MAKE ME REGRET TAKING THESE OFF.

Austin: GUYS, YOU'VE GOT TO CHECK OUT THE MOVIE EXHIBITS!

THERE'S TONS OF COOL STUFF!

WHOA! THAT'S MICHAEL JACKSON'S JACKET!

( high-pitched ) HEE-HEE!

- ( gasps ) - AND THOSE ARE THE BOXING GLOVES

FROM THE "ROCKY" MOVIES.

( pants ) "YO, ADRIAN! WE DID IT!"

AUSTIN, YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE TOUCHING STUFF.

( gasps ) HOLD THE KETCHUP.

ARE THOSE THE ORIGINAL SILVER SHOES FROM "THE WIZARD OF OZ"?

YEAH, WHAT GIVES?

I THOUGHT THEY WERE SUPPOSED TO BE RUBY COLORED.

( laughs ) IN THE MOVIE.

REAL FANS KNOW THAT IN THE BOOK AND THE PLAY

THEY WERE SILVER.

OOH! I'M GONNA ADD THAT ON MY NEXT MUSEUM TOUR.

COOL!

YOU PUT ON DOROTHY'S SHOES AND THE WICKED WITCH'S SOCKS.

- THE SOCKS ARE MINE. - WOW.

YOU WEAR SOME CRAZY CLOTHES.

AUSTIN, YOU NEED TO TAKE THOSE SHOES OFF.

WHY? YOU THINK I'M GONNA RUIN 'EM?

NO, I WANNA TRY 'EM ON. ( laughs )

( grunting )

( chuckles )

( grunts )

- UH-OH, THEY'RE STUCK. - YOUR FEET MUST'VE SWELLED.

OR THE SHOE MUST'VE SHRUNK. EITHER WAY, THIS IS BAD.

( whimpers ) WE ARE GONNA GET IN SO MUCH TROUBLE.

THIS IS WHY WE DON'T TOUCH STUFF, YOUNG MAN.

EXACTLY! YOU, SIR, ARE NO ROLE MODEL.

- ( Velcro rips ) - HA!

SO WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO?

WELL, FIRST THINGS FIRST,

WE HAVE TO FIND YOU A SPARKLY DRESS TO GO WITH THOSE SHOES,

BECAUSE THIS IS A FASHION DON'T.

( grunting )

( high-pitched ) DON'T! STOP IT!

- SORRY. - SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY.

- ( grunting ) - GUYS!

OH. SORRY SORRY. SORRY SORRY SORRY.

WE HAVE TO GET THESE SHOES OFF BEFORE WE GET BUSTED.

YEAH, PEOPLE WILL THINK YOU'RE A THIEF.

YEAH, YOU CAN'T HAVE THAT KIND OF BAD PUBLICITY.

HOW ABOUT WE CUT THE SHOES OFF?

DEZ, NO. WE CAN'T DAMAGE THE SHOES.

THEY'RE THE ONLY PAIR IN THE WORLD.

THEY MUST BE WORTH, LIKE, A MILLION DOLLARS.

IS IT ME,

OR DO THEY JUST KEEP GETTING PRETTIER AND PRETTIER?

GUYS, WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO?

WELL, IF WE CAN'T CUT THE SHOES OFF,

THERE'S ONLY ONE OPTION LEFT.

AUSTIN, WE'RE CUTTING OFF YOUR FEET.

- STAY AWAY FROM ME. - Ally: OKAY, DEZ.

- CALM DOWN, IT'LL BE FINE. - AUSTIN. DEZ, DEZ, DEZ.

WE CAN'T CUT HIS FEET OFF.

WE'LL GET BLOOD ALL OVER THE SHOES AND THEY'LL BE WORTHLESS.

- AH! - AND I'LL HAVE NO FEET!

WELL, YEAH, THAT TOO.

WHAT IF WE ALL TRY TO PULL THEM OFF TOGETHER?

- Boys: OKAY. - BUT IT'D BE EASIER IF WE JUST CUT OFF HIS FEET.

- Ally: OKAY. - All: ONE, TWO...

Trish: THREE! WHOA!

( all gasp )

- HEY! GET THE HORSE! PICK UP THE HORSE - NO NO NO!

- ( all grunt ) - Ally: OKAY OKAY.

- ( Ally mumbles ) - Austin: COME ON, BUDDY.

OH, LOOK, THERE'S A HEAD. THERE'S A HEAD.

- TAKE THE HEAD. - ( boys scream )

- Ally: AH! - ( Dez grunts )

- ( Austin hyperventilating ) - THERE'S AHEAD!

- GUYS, GUYS, TAKE-- - ( screaming )

- WHOA WHOA WHOA. MOVE! - GO GO!

OKAY.

COME ON, HELP ME HERE. HELP ME HERE. HELP ME HERE.

- BUDDY. - WHOA!

- WE'RE DONE. - WE'RE GOOD. WE'RE GOOD.

- WHAT'S GOING ON HERE? - ( Ally shrieks )

( gasps )

I DIDN'T HEAR ANYBODY CRASH INTO THE EXHIBIT.

WHAT EXHIBIT? ( chuckles )

WHAT HAPPENED TO THE PONY EXPRESS?

UH, THE CURATOR JUST REPLACED IT

WITH THIS NEW EXHIBIT

ABOUT THE LEGEND OF THE HORSE-HEADED COWBOY.

- WHO? - UMM, ARE YOU TELLING ME

YOU'VE NEVER HEARD OF HENRY HORSE-HEAD?

HMM...

'CAUSE THAT'S SOMETHING ELSE I KNOW

- THAT YOU DON'T. - ( scoffs )

OF COURSE I KNOW

ALL ABOUT THE-- WITH, UH--

- PLEASE DON'T TELL MY BOSS. - ( sighs )

( sighs )

( shrieks ) HENRY!

OH!

WELL, WE'VE GOTTA DO SOMETHING

BEFORE SOMEONE NOTICES THE SHOES ARE MISSING.

LET'S NOT PANIC.

IF SOMEONE NOTICED THE SHOES WERE MISSING,

WE'D BE HEARING AN ALARM RIGHT NOW.

- ( alarm ringing ) - LIKE THAT ONE.

- UHH... - MAYBE IT'S NOT ABOUT THE SHOES.

Anders over P.A.: The silver shoes from "The Wizard of Oz"

have been stolen! I repeat: The silver shoes have been stolen!

OKAY, TIME FOR PLAN Z.

WE'LL SLATHER AUSTIN'S FEET WITH BUTTER

FROM THIS COLONIAL BUTTER CHURNER.

THAT THING IS 200 YEARS OLD.

THERE'S NO WAY THERE'S GONNA BE BUTTER IN THERE.

HEY, LOOK AT THAT.

- ( girls groan ) - TRUST ME. THIS IS GONNA WORK.

SEE? MY FINGERS ARE IN.

- ( laughs ) - UH-OH! MY FINGERS ARE STUCK!

SERIOUSLY? GET 'EM OUT!

( grunting )

SOMEBODY DO SOMETHING!

DON'T WORRY. YOU'LL STILL HAVE

ABOUT SIX OR SEVEN FINGERS LEFT.

( screams )

AH.

MMM.

ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN FIND A 200-YEAR-OLD BAGEL?

( grunts ) THE SHOES ARE STILL STUCK.

I GIVE UP. I'M GONNA GO BACK OUT THERE AND CONFESS.

JUST TELL THE MUSEUM OFFICIALS IT WAS JUST AN INNOCENT MISTAKE

- I'M SURE THEY'LL TOTALLY UNDERSTAND. - ( sighs )

WE TOTALLY DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY ANYONE WOULD STEAL THE SHOES.

BUT WHOEVER DID IT, WE WILL HUNT THEM DOWN AND SHOW THEM NO MERCY,

JUST LIKE HENRY HORSE-HEAD.

WELL, WE CAN'T CONFESS NOW-- THERE'S POLICE AND REPORTERS.

WELL, AT LEAST NO ONE THINKS IT'S US.

- HEY! - ( yelps )

- UH... - OH!

I SAW YOU GUYS NEAR THE MOVIE EXHIBITS.

MAYBE YOU STOLE THE SHOES.

HOW DARE YOU ACCUSE US?

THIS IS AUSTIN MOON,

TEEN ROLE MODEL OF THE YEAR.

YEAH, THEY DON'T GIVE MEDALS LIKE THESE TO PEOPLE WHO STEAL STUFF.

( whispers ) DEZ, I NEED MY MEDAL.

WHAT MEDAL? ( sighs )

- ( chuckles ) - ( Velcro rips )

I WASN'T ACCUSING YOU. I WAS JUST WONDERING

IF YOU SAW... ANYONE SUSPICIOUS.

UH, THE ONLY PERSON WE SAW...

WAS YOU.

OOH.

( nervous laughter ) OF COURSE.

I MEAN, I'M NOT A SUSPECT.

THAT'S CRAZY. ( deep breath )

BY THE WAY, THE MUSEUM IS OFFERING A BIG REWARD

TO WHOEVER HELPS US FIND THE SILVER SHOE STEALER.

WOW, THAT IS HARD TO SAY.

EXACTLY HOW BIG OF A REWARD?

- Ally: TRISH! - ( yelps )

( snaps ) WHAT IF WE GLUE THE SHOES TO THE GROUND

AND TIE AUSTIN TO THE BACK OF THE TOUR BUS AND--

NEXT IDEA.

WELL, THINK FAST, 'CAUSE IT'S ALL OVER THE INTERNET

- THAT SOMEONE STOLE THE SHOES. - YEAH, LOOK AT THE COMMENTS.

"WHOEVER STOLE THE SHOES DOESN'T DESERVE A MEDAL

AND SHOULD GIVE IT TO HIS BEST FRIEND INSTEAD,"

SAYS DEZ IN MIAMI.

WHAT? MUST BE ANOTHER DEZ IN MIAMI.

( chuckles ) BUT HE DOES MAKE A GOOD POINT.

MAYBE WE SHOULD LEAVE RIGHT NOW AND HEAD HOME.

WE'LL FIND SOMEONE THERE TO REMOVE THE SHOES

THEN MAIL THEM BACK TO THE MUSEUM ANONYMOUSLY.

- GOOD IDEA. LET'S GET OUT OF HERE. - ( cellphone ringing )

OOH! SHH! SHH!

THIS IS IMPORTANT.

HELLO, THIS IS TRISH DE LA ROSA,

SUPERSTAR MANAGER TO THE STARS.

( gasps ) REALLY? OH!

REALLY? OH, FANTABULOUS!

( clears throat ) SEE YOU SOON.

( high-pitched mumbling )

- WHAT'S WITH THE "REALLY? REALLY?" - AND THE "FANTABULOUS"?

AND THE... ( high-pitched mumbling )

REMEMBER THAT HUGE SURPRISE I'VE BEEN WORKING ON?

WELL, AUSTIN IS GOING TO BE PLAYING A VERY SPECIAL V.I.P. SHOW TONIGHT.

BUY I CAN'T. WE HAVE TO LEAVE TOWN

BEFORE ANYONE SEES ME IN THESE SHOES.

YOU DON'T HAVE A CHOICE.

THIS CONCERT'S FOR THE PRESIDENT

- OF THE UNITED STATES! - ( gasps )

- ( laughs ) - THE PRESIDENT?

ARE YOU SERIOUS?

THE LEADER OF THE FREE WORLD

WANTS TO SEE ME PERFORM?

YES. HE'S A BIG FAN OF YOURS

BECAUSE YOU'RE SUCH A POSITIVE ROLE MODEL FOR YOUNG PEOPLE.

WAIT. WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO ABOUT THE SHOES?!

CALM DOWN! DON'T FREAK OUT!

JUST TO BE CLEAR, WE ARE TALKING ABOUT

THE PRESIDENT OF THESE HERE UNITED STATES?

YES. OKAY.

NOW WE CAN FREAK OUT. I'LL GO FIRST.

( screaming )

THE CONCERT FOR THE PRESIDENT IS AN HOUR.

WE'LL NEVER GET THOSE SHOES OFF IN TIME.

I CAN'T CANCEL ON THE PRESIDENT.

IS THAT EVEN LEGAL?

WELL, YOU CAN'T PERFORM LIKE THAT.

THE ENTIRE PLANET IS LOOKING FOR THE SILVER SHOE STEALER.

MAN, THAT IS HARD TO SAY.

SILVER SHOE STEALER.

- SILVER-- SHILVER-- - SHILVER-- SILVER S--

GUYS, FOCUS!

SOMEONE TELL ME THEY'VE GOT A GREAT IDEA.

I'VE GOT A GREAT IDEA!

OKAY, LET ME REPHRASE THAT.

SOMEONE ACTUALLY HAVE A GREAT IDEA

AND THEN TELL ME THEY'VE GOT A GREAT IDEA.

OH.

WAIT. I THINK I HAVE A GREAT IDEA.

- YOU DO? - OH YEAH.

IT'S SO GOOD, PEOPLE ARE NEVER GONNA KNOW

AUSTIN WAS THE STILVER SHOE STEALER.

( groans ) THOUGHT I HAD IT.

- SILVER SHOE STEALER. - SHIVER--

- SHILVER SHOE STEALER. - SHIVER SLEW

( slowly ) SILVER SHOE STEALER. SILVER SHOE--

LOOK AT HIM. HE LOOKS SO...

PRESIDENTIAL.

FINGERS CROSSED THIS WORKS.

FINGERS, TOES, ARMS, LEGS AND EYES.

( crowd cheering )

( rock music playing )

SOME OF THE GREATEST SINGERS IN THE WORLD

HAVE PERFORMED FOR THE PRESIDENT.

THOSE ARE SOME REALLY BIG SHOES TO FILL,

SO I THOUGHT I'D WEAR SOME REALLY BIG SHOES.

♪ DON'T LOOK DOWN, DOWN, DOWN, DOWN ♪

♪ DON'T LOOK DOWN, DOWN, DOWN, DOWN ♪

♪ DON'T LOOK DOWN, DOWN, DOWN, DOWN... ♪

( dramatic music playing )

SHOE!

- Trish: OH! - I'M ALL RIGHT!

I'M ALL RIGHT!

NO, IT'S OKAY.

IT'S OKAY. HE'S OKAY.

IS THAT ONE OF THE MISSING SHOES FROM THE MUSEUM?

YES, MR. PRESIDENT, IT IS.

AND HERE'S THE OTHER ONE.

( crowd gasps )

I WAS GOOFING AROUND AND TRIED THEM ON,

AND WHEN THEY GOT STUCK ON MY FEET, I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO.

I'M REALLY SORRY.

NOW THIS IS VERY SERIOUS MATTER.

I KNOW AND I DESERVE TO BE PUNISHED.

I GUESS I SHOULD GIVE BACK MY MEDAL,

'CAUSE I'M A TERRIBLE ROLE MODEL.

EVERYONE MAKES MISTAKES

BUT IT TAKES A REAL ROLE MODEL

TO ADMIT IT AND ACCEPT RESPONSIBILITY.

AUSTIN, YOU'RE A GOOD KID.

SO AS PRESIDENT OF THESE HERE UNITED STATES...

( gasps )

I HEREBY PARDON YOU FROM ANY PUNISHMENT.

- ( Ally laughs ) - ( cheering )

WOW! THANK YOU, MR. PRESIDENT.

THANK ME WITH A GREAT SHOW ONCE WE GET THOSE SHOES OFF.

- YES. - YEAH.

- ( laughs ) - UH, SIR?

WHILE YOU'RE PASSING OUT PARDONS,

SOMEONE MAY HAVE SLIGHTLY SCRATCHED YOUR LIMO

WHILE TRYING TO TAKE A PICTURE OF THEMSELVES IN THE BACK SEAT.

THEN SOMEONE'S GONNA HAVE TO PAY FOR THAT.

OH...!

TOO BAD I DIDN'T GET A GOOD LOOK AT THAT SOMEONE.

( rock music playing )

( cheering )

♪ I'M WALKING ON A THIN LINE ♪

♪ AND MY HANDS ARE TIED ♪

♪ GOT NOWHERE TO HIDE ♪

♪ I'M STANDING AT A CROSSROADS ♪

♪ DON'T KNOW WHERE TO GO ♪

♪ FEELING SO EXPOSED ♪

♪ YEAH, I'M CAUGHT IN BETWEEN ♪

♪ WHERE I'M GOING AND WHERE I'VE BEEN ♪

♪ BUT KNOW THERE'S NO TURNING BACK ♪

♪ YEAH ♪

♪ IT'S LIKE I'M BALANCED ON THE EDGE ♪

♪ IT'S LIKE I'M HANGING BY A THREAD ♪

♪ BUT I'M SO GONNA PUSH AHEAD ♪

♪ SO I TELL MYSELF ♪

♪ YEAH, I TELL MYSELF ♪

♪ DON'T LOOK DOWN, DOWN, DOWN, DOWN ♪

♪ DON'T LOOK DOWN, DOWN, DOWN, DOWN ♪

♪ DON'T LOOK DOWN, DOWN, DOWN, DOWN ♪

♪ DON'T LOOK DOWN, DOWN, DOWN, DOWN ♪

♪ IT'D BE SO EASY ♪

♪ JUST TO RUN ♪

♪ IT'D BE SO EASY ♪

♪ TO JUST GIVE UP ♪

♪ NO TURNING BACK ♪

♪ IT'S LIKE I'M BALANCED ON THE EDGE ♪

♪ IT'S LIKE I'M HANGING BY A THREAD ♪

♪ BUT I'M SO GONNA PUSH AHEAD ♪

♪ SO I TELL MYSELF, YEAH, I TELL MYSELF ♪

♪ DON'T LOOK DOWN, DOWN, DOWN, DOWN ♪

♪ DON'T LOOK DOWN, DOWN, DOWN, DOWN ♪

♪ DON'T LOOK DOWN, DOWN, DOWN, DOWN ♪

♪ DON'T LOOK DOWN, DOWN, DOWN, DOWN. ♪

- ( music stops ) - ( cheers, applause )

AUSTIN, I JUST WANNA THANK YOU AGAIN FOR A WONDERFUL SHOW.

I EVEN SAW THE SPEAKER OF THE HOUSE DOING THE FUNKY CHICKEN.

YEAH, I SAW THAT TOO, SIR.

WISH I HADN'T.

NOW, DEZ,

I WANNA TALK TO YOU FOR A MOMENT.

ME, SIR?

- WHAT DID I DO? - OH, DON'T PLAY DUMB.

THE PRESIDENT PROBABLY FIGURED OUT YOU'RE THE ONE WHO SCRATCHED HIS LIMO.

TRISH, I KNOW IT WAS YOU.

YOU'LL NEVER CATCH ME.

( chuckles nervously )

DEZ, I WANNA THANK YOU FOR SAVING ME

FROM THAT GIANT FLYING SNEAKER.

AND FOR THAT ACT OF BRAVERY,

I PRESENT YOU WITH THIS MEDAL.

- ( clattering ) - ( mutters ) TOO NICE.

TOO EXPENSIVE.

AH. THAT'LL DO.

( sniffles, clears throat)

IT WAS AN HONOR, SIR.

YES! I FINALLY GOT A MEDAL!

OH! ( chuckles )

- ( Trish squeals ) - ( chuckles ) NO.

- PLEASE LET ME GO. - OH, OKAY.

NOW I'M OFF TO SEE THE NEW EXHIBIT

ABOUT HENRY, THE HORSE-HEADED COWBOY.

OH, YOU KNOW THAT'S JUST A MYTH, MR. PRESIDENT.

UH, ALLY,

NOBODY LIKES A KNOW-IT-ALL.