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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,001 --> 00:00:04,912 Subtitles by explosiveskull www.OpenSubtitles.org 2 00:00:06,131 --> 00:00:08,133 [sound of traffic] 3 00:00:20,729 --> 00:00:22,731 [upbeat music] 4 00:00:36,370 --> 00:00:38,372 [upbeat music continues] 5 00:00:50,425 --> 00:00:52,553 [listening on head phones] I attract the perfect man. 6 00:00:53,095 --> 00:00:55,430 My soul mate is here and now. 7 00:00:55,681 --> 00:00:57,683 I attract the perfect man. 8 00:00:58,392 --> 00:01:00,477 My soul mate is here and now. 9 00:01:01,186 --> 00:01:03,063 I attract the perfect man. 10 00:01:03,897 --> 00:01:04,898 It took you guys eight years 11 00:01:04,982 --> 00:01:05,983 to complete that film? 12 00:01:07,150 --> 00:01:08,318 I attract the perfect man... 13 00:01:08,485 --> 00:01:10,320 I'm glad she isn't here to hear you say that. 14 00:01:10,946 --> 00:01:12,698 Besides, not everyone was born 15 00:01:12,865 --> 00:01:14,449 with a silver spoon in their mouth. 16 00:01:14,575 --> 00:01:15,993 I attract the perfect man. 17 00:01:16,535 --> 00:01:18,161 My soul mate is here and no... 18 00:01:22,291 --> 00:01:23,876 Miss Katt, at the height of the Cold War 19 00:01:23,959 --> 00:01:25,544 - [phone ringing] - you were East Ger... 20 00:01:25,752 --> 00:01:27,087 [phone continues ringing] 21 00:01:27,462 --> 00:01:30,174 Hello, home girl. It's Pedia! 22 00:01:30,257 --> 00:01:32,259 Can you send him to me? 23 00:01:33,468 --> 00:01:36,471 No, you come home 24 00:01:36,555 --> 00:01:38,557 and pick him up yourself. 25 00:01:39,391 --> 00:01:40,475 [Vicky] But I'm busy. 26 00:01:43,020 --> 00:01:44,021 So... 27 00:01:44,188 --> 00:01:46,815 so... so you are stress eating again. 28 00:01:47,274 --> 00:01:49,902 Listen, Marina Katt's on my show today. 29 00:01:49,985 --> 00:01:51,612 - What show? - Pretzel Talk. 30 00:01:52,237 --> 00:01:53,947 - Pretzel what? - Talk! 31 00:01:54,364 --> 00:01:56,200 So, what is... [hacking cough] 32 00:01:56,867 --> 00:01:58,869 [continues coughing] 33 00:01:59,036 --> 00:02:00,454 [crunching] 34 00:02:00,537 --> 00:02:03,832 So, what is it? You're being paid at least? 35 00:02:04,041 --> 00:02:06,919 - Nothing yet, but... - I talked to Resi 36 00:02:07,085 --> 00:02:09,087 at the Alpen Hotel. 37 00:02:09,338 --> 00:02:10,756 They're looking for a chamber maid. 38 00:02:11,965 --> 00:02:13,383 [Vicky] I didn't sleep for years 39 00:02:13,467 --> 00:02:15,719 under a table in a tiny Hell's Kitchen apartment 40 00:02:15,802 --> 00:02:16,845 with six roommates 41 00:02:16,929 --> 00:02:18,430 and cockroaches crawling all over me 42 00:02:18,514 --> 00:02:20,307 and endured endless hours of acting 43 00:02:20,390 --> 00:02:22,059 in ghastly NYU student films 44 00:02:22,142 --> 00:02:23,602 where they cut off my head by mistake, 45 00:02:23,685 --> 00:02:24,811 to go to a one-horse town 46 00:02:24,895 --> 00:02:26,271 to be a fucking chambermaid! 47 00:02:28,732 --> 00:02:31,276 Sorry, I got a lot on my plate. 48 00:02:32,236 --> 00:02:33,403 What do you have? 49 00:02:33,695 --> 00:02:35,030 You don't even have a husband. 50 00:02:35,572 --> 00:02:36,740 I'm late. Gotta go. 51 00:02:37,366 --> 00:02:39,368 [upbeat music] 52 00:02:39,576 --> 00:02:40,827 - [heel snaps] - [exclaims] 53 00:02:42,162 --> 00:02:43,205 [exclaims] 54 00:02:44,623 --> 00:02:46,834 [desperate laughter] 55 00:02:46,959 --> 00:02:48,961 [upbeat instrumental music] 56 00:02:50,671 --> 00:02:52,673 [hustle and bustle of traffic] 57 00:02:58,637 --> 00:02:59,638 [Vicky] Today is the day 58 00:02:59,721 --> 00:03:01,515 Hashtag "Marina Katt is on my show" 59 00:03:01,598 --> 00:03:02,808 exclamation point. 60 00:03:02,975 --> 00:03:04,977 [upbeat music continues] 61 00:03:06,103 --> 00:03:08,897 Yep, Stanley, I'm still single. 62 00:03:09,439 --> 00:03:11,024 [Stanley] I'd snap you up in a second 63 00:03:11,149 --> 00:03:12,818 if I were ten years younger. 64 00:03:13,569 --> 00:03:14,570 I wish you were... 65 00:03:14,653 --> 00:03:16,154 or ten years older, Stanley. 66 00:03:17,698 --> 00:03:19,700 [upbeat music continues] 67 00:03:33,088 --> 00:03:35,090 - [rumbling] - [traffic noise] 68 00:03:37,384 --> 00:03:39,178 Enzo, send her to Trader Joe's for OJ... 69 00:03:39,261 --> 00:03:40,304 it's cheaper. 70 00:03:40,387 --> 00:03:41,388 Okay, cool. 71 00:03:41,471 --> 00:03:42,556 What else does Marina like? 72 00:03:42,973 --> 00:03:44,016 [Vicky] I left a list for Blanche 73 00:03:44,099 --> 00:03:45,893 on the fridge. Gotta go. Bye! 74 00:03:46,518 --> 00:03:47,644 It wasn't the kiss alone 75 00:03:47,769 --> 00:03:49,146 that changed the frog. 76 00:03:49,271 --> 00:03:50,480 [Vicky] It was because she looked 77 00:03:50,564 --> 00:03:51,565 beneath the slime and warts 78 00:03:51,648 --> 00:03:52,858 and believed she saw a prince. 79 00:03:52,941 --> 00:03:54,359 So he became one. 80 00:03:57,487 --> 00:03:58,488 What's...? 81 00:03:59,239 --> 00:04:00,449 She's doing her on-the-run 82 00:04:00,574 --> 00:04:01,700 screen writing again. 83 00:04:02,409 --> 00:04:03,744 [laughs] Jeez! 84 00:04:05,954 --> 00:04:06,997 Jeez. 85 00:04:07,831 --> 00:04:09,458 [blowing] 86 00:04:09,666 --> 00:04:11,668 [hustle and bustle of traffic] 87 00:04:12,419 --> 00:04:13,420 [recording voice] "Danke dass Sie bei unserer 88 00:04:13,504 --> 00:04:14,505 Arlington Friedhof-tour 89 00:04:14,588 --> 00:04:15,589 dabei waren. 90 00:04:16,340 --> 00:04:17,591 Merci d'avoir participé 91 00:04:17,674 --> 00:04:18,842 notre visite guidée 92 00:04:18,926 --> 00:04:20,511 du cimetrière Arlington. 93 00:04:22,304 --> 00:04:23,305 Got it! 94 00:04:28,185 --> 00:04:29,269 - There you go. - Thanks 95 00:04:29,394 --> 00:04:30,437 Ahem. 96 00:04:31,396 --> 00:04:32,689 Sixty dollars? 97 00:04:33,273 --> 00:04:34,274 Sorry, Vic. 98 00:04:34,358 --> 00:04:35,359 I'm sorry, Marv. 99 00:04:35,442 --> 00:04:37,110 I'm supposed to get 200. Fess up. 100 00:04:37,486 --> 00:04:38,779 Would you relax? 101 00:04:38,862 --> 00:04:40,656 These guys have plenty of work for you. 102 00:04:41,240 --> 00:04:42,616 My advice... 103 00:04:44,076 --> 00:04:45,661 don't poke the bear! 104 00:04:46,161 --> 00:04:47,579 Who's the bear? You? 105 00:04:47,663 --> 00:04:48,997 No! Them! 106 00:04:49,373 --> 00:04:51,750 If they're a bear, I'm a fucking lion! 107 00:04:51,834 --> 00:04:53,669 Hand it over, or I'm gonna start talking 108 00:04:53,752 --> 00:04:55,546 about the boy porn magazines you're trying to hide 109 00:04:55,629 --> 00:04:57,172 behind the speaker which, by the way, 110 00:04:57,256 --> 00:04:59,132 is a horrible place to hide shit. 111 00:04:59,633 --> 00:05:00,926 [Vicky] Especially because I can see them. 112 00:05:01,468 --> 00:05:03,053 And I'm sure your wife won't be too happy 113 00:05:03,136 --> 00:05:04,137 to hear about that. 114 00:05:04,471 --> 00:05:05,514 [sighs] 115 00:05:08,851 --> 00:05:10,853 [upbeat music] 116 00:05:10,936 --> 00:05:12,437 [hustle and bustle of traffic] 117 00:05:20,362 --> 00:05:21,780 [man] We're looking for just one more spot 118 00:05:21,905 --> 00:05:24,741 to fill for the upcoming billboard awards. 119 00:05:25,784 --> 00:05:26,827 [exclaims and laughs] 120 00:05:26,910 --> 00:05:28,453 What's wrong with your arm? 121 00:05:28,662 --> 00:05:30,539 No, no, it's just shoulder tendinitis 122 00:05:30,622 --> 00:05:31,748 from teaching dance. 123 00:05:31,915 --> 00:05:33,417 I'll be fine in time for the show. 124 00:05:33,542 --> 00:05:34,835 We're looking for girls who can twerk. 125 00:05:35,335 --> 00:05:36,420 Oh, I can twerk. 126 00:05:36,879 --> 00:05:39,464 Mmm... but there's nothing here that says you can. 127 00:05:40,299 --> 00:05:43,177 But... twerking is not hard. 128 00:05:43,510 --> 00:05:44,720 Yeah, and you have to be black. 129 00:05:45,554 --> 00:05:46,722 [Vicky] Oh! 130 00:05:47,764 --> 00:05:49,141 [man] Thanks, Vicky. 131 00:05:49,224 --> 00:05:50,350 No, thank you. 132 00:05:50,809 --> 00:05:52,603 And it's Victoria, by the way. 133 00:05:54,313 --> 00:05:55,439 [hustle and bustle of traffic] 134 00:05:55,647 --> 00:05:57,232 [Vicky] Have you heard from Marina yet? 135 00:05:57,816 --> 00:05:59,818 Okay. Text me when you do. 136 00:06:00,611 --> 00:06:02,613 [traffic noise] 137 00:06:06,241 --> 00:06:09,036 Oh! Get the crazy glue, Blanche. 138 00:06:09,328 --> 00:06:11,038 - Where? - Top drawer. 139 00:06:11,205 --> 00:06:14,208 And water. Bottled water, from the fridge. 140 00:06:14,291 --> 00:06:15,292 Okay. 141 00:06:15,876 --> 00:06:16,877 [Vicky exclaims] 142 00:06:17,336 --> 00:06:18,462 - You're good? - Yeah. 143 00:06:22,090 --> 00:06:23,091 Hey, guys. 144 00:06:23,175 --> 00:06:25,594 Meet my manager, Lando Cox. 145 00:06:26,053 --> 00:06:27,971 He represented Aretha Franklin's sister. 146 00:06:28,639 --> 00:06:30,432 Yeah. Karolyn Franklin. 147 00:06:30,766 --> 00:06:32,351 But I don't care about stars, 148 00:06:32,601 --> 00:06:33,852 I make 'em right, babe? 149 00:06:33,977 --> 00:06:34,978 Uh. 150 00:06:35,145 --> 00:06:36,522 Oh! Victoria is shooting 151 00:06:36,605 --> 00:06:37,814 her own talk show. 152 00:06:37,940 --> 00:06:39,316 Oh, yeah? Who's on it? 153 00:06:39,566 --> 00:06:40,901 Uh, Marina Katt. 154 00:06:41,735 --> 00:06:42,986 The Olympic figure skater? 155 00:06:43,237 --> 00:06:44,780 - Yeah! - You know her? 156 00:06:45,405 --> 00:06:48,200 I've still got her Playboy issue from 1994. 157 00:06:48,909 --> 00:06:50,452 Do you think you can get her to sign it for me 158 00:06:52,412 --> 00:06:53,539 I'll be right back, babe. 159 00:06:55,499 --> 00:06:57,125 [all three laugh] 160 00:06:58,919 --> 00:07:00,170 [laughs] 161 00:07:01,505 --> 00:07:02,840 [traffic noise] 162 00:07:09,179 --> 00:07:11,348 I'm not talking about East Germany again. 163 00:07:12,349 --> 00:07:13,851 My head is free and clear. 164 00:07:13,934 --> 00:07:15,936 My head is free and clear. 165 00:07:16,103 --> 00:07:17,563 My head.. Ah, forget it! 166 00:07:17,646 --> 00:07:18,939 [rattling] 167 00:07:23,861 --> 00:07:25,320 Where's Blanche with the water? 168 00:07:25,404 --> 00:07:26,488 I should've fired her. 169 00:07:26,572 --> 00:07:28,699 We can't afford professionals. 170 00:07:29,157 --> 00:07:30,242 Why are you texting? 171 00:07:30,784 --> 00:07:32,911 I put some money on a penny stock. 172 00:07:33,161 --> 00:07:34,913 It could make me an instant millionaire. 173 00:07:35,205 --> 00:07:36,456 [Vicky] I need you to focus. 174 00:07:36,832 --> 00:07:37,833 Suggestions? 175 00:07:38,041 --> 00:07:39,793 Just... don't babble. 176 00:07:40,210 --> 00:07:41,253 You're gonna stick to the point. 177 00:07:41,420 --> 00:07:43,088 - I don't babble! - Yeah! 178 00:07:43,714 --> 00:07:46,258 Annoyed, reprimanded, pissy... 179 00:07:47,676 --> 00:07:48,844 "Oh, for the muse of fire 180 00:07:48,927 --> 00:07:50,345 that would ascend the brightest 181 00:07:50,429 --> 00:07:51,597 heaven of invention!" 182 00:07:51,680 --> 00:07:53,682 "Lambic pentameter" is still babbling. 183 00:07:54,892 --> 00:07:57,019 "A kingdom for a stage, 184 00:07:57,102 --> 00:07:58,228 - princes to act - [phone rings] 185 00:07:58,312 --> 00:07:59,396 and monarchs to behold 186 00:07:59,479 --> 00:08:01,148 - the swelling scene - Yeah? 187 00:08:01,231 --> 00:08:03,692 - then should the... - Yeah, we're down here. 188 00:08:04,860 --> 00:08:06,528 Cool! Sure, sure! 189 00:08:07,029 --> 00:08:08,363 All right. We're all here. 190 00:08:08,530 --> 00:08:11,533 Okay. [inaudible] 191 00:08:12,117 --> 00:08:13,368 Let's do this. [ping] 192 00:08:13,702 --> 00:08:16,288 Hi, everyone. Welcome to Pretzel Talk, 193 00:08:16,371 --> 00:08:18,165 live behind the scenes. 194 00:08:19,416 --> 00:08:21,126 It's show time! 195 00:08:21,210 --> 00:08:22,794 [laughs] Whoo-hoo! 196 00:08:25,339 --> 00:08:27,049 What an honour to have you 197 00:08:27,132 --> 00:08:28,926 on our show, Miss Katt! 198 00:08:29,051 --> 00:08:30,093 Thank you. 199 00:08:32,304 --> 00:08:33,430 [thud] 200 00:08:36,058 --> 00:08:37,643 Go, go, go, go! 201 00:08:37,726 --> 00:08:41,063 Okay. Say hi to your Facebook fans. 202 00:08:41,188 --> 00:08:42,689 We're live streaming! 203 00:08:43,273 --> 00:08:44,525 You went to school 204 00:08:44,608 --> 00:08:46,193 to be a pretzel handler. 205 00:08:48,028 --> 00:08:49,112 [clang] 206 00:08:49,196 --> 00:08:50,197 Let me explain 207 00:08:50,280 --> 00:08:51,448 Pretzel Talk's format to you. 208 00:08:51,532 --> 00:08:52,991 First, we do a little dance 209 00:08:53,075 --> 00:08:54,243 underneath the pretzel... 210 00:08:54,326 --> 00:08:56,328 Die Pretzel kommt jetzt! 211 00:08:57,204 --> 00:08:58,288 [rustling] 212 00:08:58,372 --> 00:08:59,540 [Vicky] ...little bit of a German thing 213 00:08:59,623 --> 00:09:01,333 going on, since we're both Germanic. 214 00:09:01,416 --> 00:09:02,417 [Vicky laughs] 215 00:09:02,501 --> 00:09:03,544 Gotta have a shtick. 216 00:09:03,919 --> 00:09:05,170 The joke is... 217 00:09:05,337 --> 00:09:06,380 everything breaks down 218 00:09:06,463 --> 00:09:07,464 in this old building. 219 00:09:07,631 --> 00:09:09,007 Your heel is broken! 220 00:09:09,341 --> 00:09:11,051 Oh! That's part of the theme. 221 00:09:11,969 --> 00:09:13,178 So... 222 00:09:14,680 --> 00:09:15,681 the buzzer is broken, 223 00:09:15,764 --> 00:09:16,974 so you grab a key 224 00:09:17,182 --> 00:09:18,350 to let yourself in. 225 00:09:19,101 --> 00:09:20,310 Then we do the interview in my studio 226 00:09:20,394 --> 00:09:21,395 which will probably remind you 227 00:09:21,478 --> 00:09:23,939 of East Germany in the 1970's. 228 00:09:24,106 --> 00:09:25,107 [Vicky] The walls are so thin, 229 00:09:25,190 --> 00:09:26,316 the Secret Police wouldn't even 230 00:09:26,400 --> 00:09:27,609 have to plant a bug! 231 00:09:27,693 --> 00:09:28,694 [laughs] 232 00:09:28,777 --> 00:09:31,905 Okay. So, this is our camera man. 233 00:09:32,531 --> 00:09:35,200 Welcome to another edition of Pretzel Talk. 234 00:09:35,284 --> 00:09:36,869 I'm your host, Victoria Timm. 235 00:09:37,286 --> 00:09:39,037 Today we have a very special guest, 236 00:09:39,121 --> 00:09:40,956 whom I've admired since childhood, 237 00:09:41,373 --> 00:09:42,958 even though we're the same age. 238 00:09:43,625 --> 00:09:46,795 She's won three Olympic gold medals 239 00:09:46,879 --> 00:09:49,923 in figure skating. Marina Katt! 240 00:09:50,465 --> 00:09:51,758 [laughs uncomfortably] 241 00:09:51,842 --> 00:09:53,010 [Vicky] Okay. 242 00:09:54,428 --> 00:09:55,721 It got stuck! 243 00:09:57,973 --> 00:09:59,474 [Blanche screams] 244 00:10:00,350 --> 00:10:01,351 [laughs] 245 00:10:01,435 --> 00:10:03,437 So, here is our melody, 246 00:10:04,813 --> 00:10:07,024 theme song... Feel free to move to it! 247 00:10:07,107 --> 00:10:08,567 I won't do this! 248 00:10:08,650 --> 00:10:10,652 [theme song plays] 249 00:10:12,946 --> 00:10:14,239 Stop the pretzel! 250 00:10:14,323 --> 00:10:15,908 Pull it up! Pull it up! 251 00:10:17,159 --> 00:10:18,243 Cut! 252 00:10:19,036 --> 00:10:20,037 Cut! 253 00:10:21,163 --> 00:10:22,289 [snip] 254 00:10:23,165 --> 00:10:25,167 [screams] 255 00:10:25,250 --> 00:10:26,418 [comedic music] 256 00:10:26,502 --> 00:10:27,878 - [exclaims] - [laughs] 257 00:10:27,961 --> 00:10:30,714 Miss Katt, tell us about your amazing career 258 00:10:30,797 --> 00:10:32,382 that evolved from and 18-year old, 259 00:10:32,466 --> 00:10:34,593 stepping out from behind the iron curtain. 260 00:10:34,885 --> 00:10:36,887 [comedic music continues] 261 00:10:41,850 --> 00:10:43,018 I'm gonna get fired! 262 00:10:44,311 --> 00:10:45,687 I'll have to go back to school! 263 00:10:46,188 --> 00:10:47,397 [Lando] Miss Katt! 264 00:10:49,483 --> 00:10:50,817 Miss Katt! 265 00:10:59,368 --> 00:11:01,370 [instrumental music] 266 00:11:02,538 --> 00:11:03,914 [water dripping] 267 00:11:04,373 --> 00:11:05,374 [sighs] 268 00:11:05,499 --> 00:11:06,500 [Mutti] A real star 269 00:11:06,625 --> 00:11:08,627 would've done the interview. 270 00:11:08,710 --> 00:11:09,711 I blew it! 271 00:11:09,878 --> 00:11:11,129 [Mutti] Open the package. 272 00:11:11,463 --> 00:11:12,673 Open it! 273 00:11:15,384 --> 00:11:20,889 [rustling] 274 00:11:22,724 --> 00:11:23,976 [laughs] 275 00:11:24,142 --> 00:11:26,603 [Mutti] Pedia never gave up, 276 00:11:27,521 --> 00:11:30,232 even after the dog bit him, right? 277 00:11:31,066 --> 00:11:32,693 Yeah, he was decapitated... 278 00:11:32,943 --> 00:11:35,737 Which turned out to be to his advantage. 279 00:11:36,071 --> 00:11:37,239 It made him weigh less. 280 00:11:37,364 --> 00:11:38,448 [Mutti] And you even 281 00:11:38,574 --> 00:11:40,450 sewed clothes for him... 282 00:11:40,784 --> 00:11:42,786 and Pedia, the penguin was born. 283 00:11:42,911 --> 00:11:44,204 [Victoria laughs] 284 00:11:44,413 --> 00:11:46,498 [laughs] The name was your idea. 285 00:11:46,707 --> 00:11:48,709 Despite his giant ears 286 00:11:49,501 --> 00:11:51,086 and potato nose, he... 287 00:11:51,336 --> 00:11:54,256 won the Olympics in ski jumping. 288 00:11:54,423 --> 00:11:55,716 [Mutti] Even beating out 289 00:11:55,883 --> 00:11:58,844 the great Max, the Mallard! 290 00:11:59,052 --> 00:12:00,512 The man of my dreams. 291 00:12:02,389 --> 00:12:03,891 [laughs] 292 00:12:04,099 --> 00:12:06,268 I felt guilty having Pedia beat him. 293 00:12:06,810 --> 00:12:08,228 [Mutti] Don't worry. 294 00:12:09,188 --> 00:12:11,190 [laughs] So did everybody else! 295 00:12:11,273 --> 00:12:14,902 - [laughs] - [Vicky laughs] 296 00:12:15,152 --> 00:12:17,362 [rustling] 297 00:12:17,529 --> 00:12:19,281 Thanks for sending my things. 298 00:12:19,740 --> 00:12:20,866 I love you, Mutti. 299 00:12:21,867 --> 00:12:24,203 I couldn't hold onto your junk, anyway. 300 00:12:24,328 --> 00:12:25,370 - [dripping] - [exclaims] 301 00:12:25,454 --> 00:12:26,496 [Mutti] They only let us 302 00:12:26,580 --> 00:12:27,623 have one room. 303 00:12:27,706 --> 00:12:28,916 I gotta go, Mom. 304 00:12:30,459 --> 00:12:31,793 - [dripping] - [exclaims] 305 00:12:33,587 --> 00:12:35,297 You haven't seen everything. 306 00:12:35,422 --> 00:12:36,507 [sighs] 307 00:12:36,673 --> 00:12:39,092 - [rattling] - [exclaims] 308 00:12:39,343 --> 00:12:40,844 Mmm! Your pot? 309 00:12:41,136 --> 00:12:42,721 I'm not gonna live with you! 310 00:12:42,804 --> 00:12:46,517 [dripping continues] 311 00:12:47,434 --> 00:12:48,685 [drip] 312 00:12:52,272 --> 00:12:53,273 [drip] 313 00:12:55,275 --> 00:12:56,735 - [splashing] - [exclaims] 314 00:12:57,361 --> 00:12:58,695 [gasps] 315 00:12:59,780 --> 00:13:01,782 [dripping continues] 316 00:13:02,783 --> 00:13:03,992 [sighs] 317 00:13:04,785 --> 00:13:06,203 Oh, shit! 318 00:13:06,495 --> 00:13:09,081 [dripping continues] 319 00:13:09,498 --> 00:13:10,999 - [whizzing] - [clack] 320 00:13:13,210 --> 00:13:14,253 [click] 321 00:13:14,336 --> 00:13:15,712 [Vicky] Excuse me. 322 00:13:16,672 --> 00:13:18,674 [muted whizzing] 323 00:13:21,635 --> 00:13:23,470 Europe is looking better and better. 324 00:13:24,346 --> 00:13:25,514 I still think Pretzel talk 325 00:13:25,681 --> 00:13:26,765 has real potential. 326 00:13:26,932 --> 00:13:29,226 Yeah! Two likes on Facebook. 327 00:13:29,685 --> 00:13:31,144 Have you checked lately? 328 00:13:32,354 --> 00:13:34,147 After the fiasco with ESPN, 329 00:13:34,231 --> 00:13:35,315 who the hell is going to come 330 00:13:35,399 --> 00:13:36,441 to my show? 331 00:13:36,525 --> 00:13:37,693 The Marina pretzel bit 332 00:13:37,818 --> 00:13:39,653 got 30 000 hits on You Tube. 333 00:13:40,821 --> 00:13:43,615 You posted it? How could you! 334 00:13:43,866 --> 00:13:45,868 Of course I did. It's... It's funny... 335 00:13:46,159 --> 00:13:48,120 Why does everybody let me down? 336 00:13:48,245 --> 00:13:51,707 So, then how come Max Bauer wants to see you? 337 00:13:52,416 --> 00:13:54,126 - Who? - Ahem. 338 00:13:54,459 --> 00:13:55,961 He commented on the video. 339 00:13:56,962 --> 00:13:58,755 Max... the Mallard? 340 00:13:58,881 --> 00:13:59,965 Ahem. 341 00:14:00,674 --> 00:14:01,842 - You're kidding! - No. 342 00:14:02,009 --> 00:14:05,888 - [both laugh] - Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 343 00:14:06,680 --> 00:14:07,723 You know what? 344 00:14:07,890 --> 00:14:08,891 You let me know 345 00:14:08,974 --> 00:14:10,767 when you wanna sink the show. 346 00:14:11,268 --> 00:14:13,770 Oh! Oh my God! What am I gonna do? 347 00:14:13,896 --> 00:14:14,897 Uhm... Ah! 348 00:14:15,022 --> 00:14:17,024 [cheesy 70's music] 349 00:14:17,316 --> 00:14:19,151 Pedia! [giggles] 350 00:14:19,401 --> 00:14:20,861 Thank you, Pedia! Thank you! 351 00:14:23,739 --> 00:14:25,240 [laughs] Pedia! 352 00:14:27,492 --> 00:14:29,494 [continues laughing] 353 00:14:35,042 --> 00:14:36,752 - Mhwa! Thank you! - Good bye. 354 00:14:39,004 --> 00:14:40,797 [dogs growling and barking] 355 00:14:41,048 --> 00:14:43,050 [announcer] Our former Olympic ski jumping star, 356 00:14:43,133 --> 00:14:46,053 Max Bauer, became the third celebrity 357 00:14:46,136 --> 00:14:48,514 to be voted off "Gone to the Dogs". 358 00:14:49,348 --> 00:14:51,850 Well, that was an interesting learning experience 359 00:14:51,934 --> 00:14:54,061 about group dynamics. 360 00:14:54,353 --> 00:14:55,521 Hi, to all my fans! 361 00:14:55,687 --> 00:14:57,356 [announcer] After successfully finishing 362 00:14:57,439 --> 00:14:59,358 round two, Bauer couldn't hold 363 00:14:59,441 --> 00:15:01,568 his own among a pack of semi-wild dogs 364 00:15:01,652 --> 00:15:04,029 in the Liechtenstein outback. 365 00:15:04,154 --> 00:15:05,197 [click] 366 00:15:08,784 --> 00:15:10,786 [silence] 367 00:15:11,828 --> 00:15:12,871 [click] 368 00:15:15,749 --> 00:15:16,750 [click] 369 00:15:19,419 --> 00:15:21,421 [silence continues] 370 00:15:24,341 --> 00:15:26,385 [typing] 371 00:15:35,727 --> 00:15:37,729 [typing continues] 372 00:15:49,741 --> 00:15:50,742 [message pings] 373 00:16:00,085 --> 00:16:03,589 [romantic music] 374 00:16:14,725 --> 00:16:16,185 [groans] 375 00:16:20,105 --> 00:16:22,524 [breathing rhythmically] 376 00:16:25,235 --> 00:16:26,361 [traffic noise] 377 00:16:26,445 --> 00:16:27,779 He's still not here! 378 00:16:28,822 --> 00:16:30,365 He's still not here! 379 00:16:31,116 --> 00:16:32,618 Maybe he booked a better show. 380 00:16:33,243 --> 00:16:35,621 Yeah, he's working with a better breed of dogs. 381 00:16:38,165 --> 00:16:40,501 Pissy, annoyed, frustrated! 382 00:16:41,376 --> 00:16:42,377 [expels breath] 383 00:16:43,170 --> 00:16:45,172 Oh, for the muse of fire that... 384 00:16:45,297 --> 00:16:46,465 Where's the fire? 385 00:16:47,799 --> 00:16:49,468 [laughs] Oh, my God! Hi! 386 00:16:49,718 --> 00:16:51,512 - Oh, no! - I was just goofing around. 387 00:16:51,803 --> 00:16:52,846 [Vicky giggles] Hi! 388 00:16:52,930 --> 00:16:53,931 [Max] It's Max. 389 00:16:54,014 --> 00:16:55,224 [Vicky] Welcome to New York. 390 00:16:55,307 --> 00:16:56,642 - Welcome to Pretzel Talk... - [Max] You're... 391 00:16:56,725 --> 00:16:58,977 I... I am... Victoria. [giggles] 392 00:16:59,102 --> 00:17:01,188 - Victoria Tim. - Victoria... Nice to meet you. 393 00:17:01,271 --> 00:17:02,731 Yeah. Nice to meet you too. 394 00:17:03,982 --> 00:17:05,984 [traffic noise in background] 395 00:17:08,946 --> 00:17:10,322 [Enzo] All right, shall we start? 396 00:17:14,076 --> 00:17:16,703 - Mister Bauer... - You can call me Max. 397 00:17:17,204 --> 00:17:18,288 - Max? - Yeah. 398 00:17:19,289 --> 00:17:21,291 [Vicky] Not only did you win the World Cup, 399 00:17:21,416 --> 00:17:23,794 you set the world's unofficial ski jumping record 400 00:17:23,919 --> 00:17:27,548 of 954 feet in Albertville, 401 00:17:27,631 --> 00:17:29,633 managing to land on only one ski 402 00:17:29,716 --> 00:17:31,093 after the other one came off! 403 00:17:31,885 --> 00:17:34,471 Wow! Somebody did their homework, right? 404 00:17:34,555 --> 00:17:35,556 [Vicky laughs] 405 00:17:35,639 --> 00:17:36,640 What's it like to fly 406 00:17:36,723 --> 00:17:38,475 at a speed of 75 miles per hour 407 00:17:38,559 --> 00:17:41,270 over an area as large as a football field? 408 00:17:41,520 --> 00:17:45,524 Oh, it's like slow motion, shhhhh... 409 00:17:46,066 --> 00:17:47,401 if everything goes well. 410 00:17:48,151 --> 00:17:49,945 How do you overcome your fear? 411 00:17:51,363 --> 00:17:53,198 I imagine the space below me 412 00:17:53,323 --> 00:17:54,867 not as empty, but filled with energies 413 00:17:54,950 --> 00:17:57,703 and with voices, hoo... 414 00:17:57,828 --> 00:18:01,206 - and spirits, right? - [Vicky] That's fascinating! 415 00:18:01,290 --> 00:18:02,291 [Max] Yeah. 416 00:18:02,374 --> 00:18:03,375 [Vicky] With the same abandon 417 00:18:03,458 --> 00:18:04,585 that make you hurl yourself 418 00:18:04,710 --> 00:18:06,461 off 350 foot platforms, 419 00:18:06,545 --> 00:18:08,005 you throw yourself into all sorts 420 00:18:08,088 --> 00:18:09,298 - of celebrity odd jobs, - [laughs] 421 00:18:09,464 --> 00:18:11,300 and everywhere fans wanna see 422 00:18:11,383 --> 00:18:13,719 - your famous "Tele-Max". - [laughs] 423 00:18:13,969 --> 00:18:15,220 Oh, that! Yeah. 424 00:18:15,304 --> 00:18:16,305 The trademark finish. 425 00:18:16,388 --> 00:18:17,389 You execute it 426 00:18:17,472 --> 00:18:18,891 with the elegance of a dancer... 427 00:18:19,141 --> 00:18:20,851 after your legendary landing. 428 00:18:21,685 --> 00:18:23,228 - I mean, you are the dancer. - [laughs] 429 00:18:23,312 --> 00:18:24,688 I just move around 430 00:18:24,771 --> 00:18:25,856 and the people look at me, 431 00:18:25,939 --> 00:18:27,733 I look back, and then they clap. 432 00:18:28,650 --> 00:18:30,402 Hardly! Could you... 433 00:18:30,652 --> 00:18:32,905 maybe do your Tele-Max for us? 434 00:18:33,155 --> 00:18:34,615 Oh, nobody wants to see that. 435 00:18:34,823 --> 00:18:37,159 I'm sure we all would love to see that, right folks? 436 00:18:37,242 --> 00:18:39,244 - Right? - Yeah, we wanna see it! 437 00:18:39,328 --> 00:18:40,454 - You wanna see it? - Yeah! 438 00:18:40,537 --> 00:18:42,080 [Max] Okay, I'll do it. 439 00:18:43,415 --> 00:18:49,463 Besides landing in one piece of course, form is 440 00:18:49,546 --> 00:18:50,756 - [phone pings] - the most important thing. 441 00:18:50,881 --> 00:18:51,965 So... 442 00:18:52,049 --> 00:18:53,842 God, the stocks are up big. 443 00:18:58,847 --> 00:19:01,058 [Max] All right, so besides landing 444 00:19:01,141 --> 00:19:03,644 in one piece, form is the most important thing. 445 00:19:03,810 --> 00:19:05,062 Watch! 446 00:19:06,230 --> 00:19:07,314 [expels breath] 447 00:19:07,397 --> 00:19:09,274 And when you land and when you bow 448 00:19:10,317 --> 00:19:12,319 you must hold their attention. 449 00:19:13,362 --> 00:19:14,905 Then you come up slowly... 450 00:19:15,322 --> 00:19:17,950 slowly you hold, you hold... 451 00:19:18,242 --> 00:19:20,869 you give them the Pavarotti smile... 452 00:19:21,912 --> 00:19:24,248 and the audience goes wild! 453 00:19:24,331 --> 00:19:26,542 What an amazing feat of strength! 454 00:19:26,625 --> 00:19:28,293 The coordination! 455 00:19:28,877 --> 00:19:30,879 Does this man have any weaknesses? 456 00:19:30,963 --> 00:19:32,047 [laughs] 457 00:19:32,130 --> 00:19:33,215 My weakness is finding out 458 00:19:33,298 --> 00:19:34,424 about beautiful women. 459 00:19:34,716 --> 00:19:36,093 [Vicky laughs] 460 00:19:36,218 --> 00:19:38,220 [Enzo] Sorry, guys, it was a false alarm. 461 00:19:44,643 --> 00:19:46,436 [Vicky] So, you were born 462 00:19:46,520 --> 00:19:47,771 - in Liechtenstein... - Yeah. 463 00:19:47,855 --> 00:19:49,898 you speak four languages fluently, 464 00:19:50,065 --> 00:19:52,734 have trained Germany, Switzerland and the US... 465 00:19:52,943 --> 00:19:54,152 Where is home? 466 00:19:54,528 --> 00:19:56,238 Home is where the heart is. 467 00:19:56,864 --> 00:19:59,283 - Oh, that's totally true. - Yeah. 468 00:19:59,992 --> 00:20:01,827 A perfect way to end the show. 469 00:20:01,910 --> 00:20:03,203 Thank you, Mr Mallard. 470 00:20:03,328 --> 00:20:05,330 [laughs] Sorry, Max... 471 00:20:05,414 --> 00:20:06,832 No, no, no! Wait, wait, wait! 472 00:20:06,915 --> 00:20:08,292 You can't... Excuse me! 473 00:20:08,542 --> 00:20:10,377 You can't end your show 474 00:20:10,460 --> 00:20:11,587 without telling the audience 475 00:20:11,670 --> 00:20:14,047 - about your film! - [Vicky] Yeah! 476 00:20:14,173 --> 00:20:15,465 Okay! 477 00:20:15,632 --> 00:20:17,259 Visit us on pretzeltalk.com 478 00:20:17,384 --> 00:20:18,427 where you can download 479 00:20:18,510 --> 00:20:19,803 my movie "Tango Schmango" 480 00:20:19,887 --> 00:20:22,014 or order a limited edition DVD. 481 00:20:22,097 --> 00:20:24,099 [laughs] 482 00:20:26,143 --> 00:20:27,144 [laughs] 483 00:20:27,978 --> 00:20:29,146 Lower. 484 00:20:30,355 --> 00:20:32,858 [both] We will see you next time. 485 00:20:32,941 --> 00:20:37,404 [groans] I, uh... I guess I'll just go. 486 00:20:37,571 --> 00:20:38,989 I'll see you guys later. 487 00:20:44,494 --> 00:20:45,746 Let's look at it. 488 00:20:55,714 --> 00:20:56,882 - Wow! - It's good. 489 00:20:57,883 --> 00:20:59,134 Great job! 490 00:20:59,384 --> 00:21:00,511 Capturing me from this angle, 491 00:21:00,594 --> 00:21:02,262 I mean, I look fantastic. 492 00:21:03,347 --> 00:21:05,349 [ukulele music] 493 00:21:13,315 --> 00:21:14,441 For you. 494 00:21:14,942 --> 00:21:17,402 There's a love scene that embarrassed my mom. 495 00:21:18,904 --> 00:21:20,364 - [Victoria laughs] - I'm not uptight. 496 00:21:21,073 --> 00:21:22,741 Tango Schmango. 497 00:21:22,866 --> 00:21:23,909 [both laugh] 498 00:21:27,496 --> 00:21:28,664 I don't know, I'm kind of shy, Vicky. 499 00:21:28,789 --> 00:21:30,165 I don't know what to say. 500 00:21:30,249 --> 00:21:31,542 [Victoria giggles] 501 00:21:34,336 --> 00:21:38,966 And... Tango Schmango. 502 00:21:40,676 --> 00:21:42,678 [ukulele music continues] 503 00:21:51,562 --> 00:21:53,564 [ukulele music continues] 504 00:22:01,989 --> 00:22:03,991 [Victoria laughs] 505 00:22:14,001 --> 00:22:15,210 [Victoria laughs] 506 00:22:15,335 --> 00:22:17,337 [clapping] 507 00:22:18,714 --> 00:22:20,132 - You all right? - [Victoria giggles] 508 00:22:22,050 --> 00:22:23,468 - [both laughing] - Oh, here we are. 509 00:22:24,386 --> 00:22:25,679 [giggles] This is it. 510 00:22:26,555 --> 00:22:28,015 Um... could you wait a sec? 511 00:22:28,098 --> 00:22:29,933 I wanna make sure the workers didn't leave a mess. 512 00:22:30,893 --> 00:22:32,352 I only have eyes for you. 513 00:22:37,774 --> 00:22:40,611 [clanging] 514 00:22:49,286 --> 00:22:50,495 Can I help you? 515 00:22:50,787 --> 00:22:51,788 [zip] 516 00:22:51,914 --> 00:22:53,081 Oh, uh... 517 00:22:54,708 --> 00:22:56,502 Miss Timm is coming down to meet me. 518 00:22:56,627 --> 00:22:58,420 [gasps] 519 00:22:59,296 --> 00:23:01,215 What the hell is she doing up there? 520 00:23:01,548 --> 00:23:02,758 All that noise! 521 00:23:02,841 --> 00:23:04,593 It's like living on a construction site! 522 00:23:04,760 --> 00:23:06,386 It's terrible, of course, you know. 523 00:23:07,054 --> 00:23:09,139 I'll make sure the noise stops at once. 524 00:23:09,389 --> 00:23:11,016 Oh, well thank you. 525 00:23:12,309 --> 00:23:14,478 Ah! Thank you again. 526 00:23:14,895 --> 00:23:16,897 It keeps me up at night. 527 00:23:17,064 --> 00:23:19,358 I... I can't create me art. 528 00:23:19,733 --> 00:23:20,734 What is your art? 529 00:23:20,984 --> 00:23:22,361 I used to be a singer, 530 00:23:22,444 --> 00:23:25,572 but nothing was really panning out. 531 00:23:25,656 --> 00:23:27,282 so now I'm... 532 00:23:28,575 --> 00:23:29,618 Go on. 533 00:23:30,994 --> 00:23:32,246 I'm creating collages 534 00:23:32,329 --> 00:23:34,998 of butterflies and... vaginas. 535 00:23:37,584 --> 00:23:38,669 Sounds interesting. 536 00:23:38,752 --> 00:23:39,837 [laughs] 537 00:23:40,379 --> 00:23:41,380 What do you do? 538 00:23:41,713 --> 00:23:42,714 About what? 539 00:23:44,383 --> 00:23:45,384 [laughs] 540 00:23:46,051 --> 00:23:48,345 No, I won the World Cup in ski jump. 541 00:23:49,179 --> 00:23:50,264 Now I'm a film maker. 542 00:23:50,597 --> 00:23:51,598 Wow! 543 00:23:51,682 --> 00:23:53,141 I think you should forget 544 00:23:53,225 --> 00:23:55,060 about everything else and just do your art. 545 00:23:55,435 --> 00:23:56,520 Right? 546 00:23:56,728 --> 00:23:58,438 March to the beat of your own drum. 547 00:23:58,939 --> 00:24:02,234 - Katchook, katchook, katchook... - [laughs] 548 00:24:02,317 --> 00:24:03,485 You think? 549 00:24:04,361 --> 00:24:07,573 Yeah. Take risks. Leap before you look. 550 00:24:10,033 --> 00:24:11,076 Stay there. 551 00:24:13,245 --> 00:24:15,038 Why? [laughs] 552 00:24:15,372 --> 00:24:16,540 May I? 553 00:24:17,583 --> 00:24:18,584 Okay. 554 00:24:21,044 --> 00:24:22,421 [clicking] 555 00:24:22,796 --> 00:24:24,965 - And... come closer. - [laughs] 556 00:24:26,300 --> 00:24:27,509 Yeah! 557 00:24:29,011 --> 00:24:30,554 [clicking] 558 00:24:31,263 --> 00:24:32,306 [click] 559 00:24:33,515 --> 00:24:36,018 So, we're on a vacation in Mexico, 560 00:24:37,352 --> 00:24:39,146 in an area called Cuetlaxcoapan, 561 00:24:39,229 --> 00:24:40,230 [both laugh] 562 00:24:40,314 --> 00:24:41,773 which means "where serpents 563 00:24:41,857 --> 00:24:43,942 - change their skin". - [laughs] 564 00:24:44,067 --> 00:24:45,068 And then, without warning, 565 00:24:45,152 --> 00:24:46,195 my wife kicks me out. 566 00:24:46,778 --> 00:24:48,113 Why did she kick you out? 567 00:24:48,238 --> 00:24:50,657 Because father was from an old Prussian clan, 568 00:24:50,741 --> 00:24:53,493 and he said I wasn't macho enough. 569 00:24:53,785 --> 00:24:55,162 And he didn't like 570 00:24:55,245 --> 00:24:56,580 that I was the nurturing type! 571 00:24:56,872 --> 00:24:59,082 It's great if a man is capable of nurturing. 572 00:24:59,208 --> 00:25:00,834 Exactly, right? 573 00:25:01,293 --> 00:25:02,336 So I found myself alone 574 00:25:02,419 --> 00:25:04,004 in the Mexican countryside. 575 00:25:04,546 --> 00:25:06,840 And... I start walking 576 00:25:06,924 --> 00:25:09,760 and I come to this tiny mountain village. 577 00:25:10,093 --> 00:25:12,679 It was high noon, there was not a soul around, 578 00:25:12,763 --> 00:25:13,889 and I was totally lost. 579 00:25:13,972 --> 00:25:14,973 And then... 580 00:25:15,057 --> 00:25:18,101 suddenly I hear this pained "moo'. 581 00:25:18,393 --> 00:25:19,728 [Victoria gasps] 582 00:25:19,978 --> 00:25:22,272 And there was this emaciated cow 583 00:25:22,397 --> 00:25:23,857 with its ribs sticking out, 584 00:25:23,982 --> 00:25:26,527 grazing in the dry grass between cacti. 585 00:25:26,777 --> 00:25:27,819 Cacti? 586 00:25:27,903 --> 00:25:29,154 It's the plural of cactus. 587 00:25:29,655 --> 00:25:31,406 I see something sticking out it's rear, 588 00:25:31,490 --> 00:25:34,159 and it's the rotten corpse of a calf. 589 00:25:34,284 --> 00:25:36,870 - No! - Yes, and I mean, I... 590 00:25:37,120 --> 00:25:38,997 I didn't know what I could've done! 591 00:25:39,373 --> 00:25:41,583 Right? I mean, I felt so helpless 592 00:25:41,667 --> 00:25:42,918 and the cow was doomed 593 00:25:43,001 --> 00:25:44,419 and I only had my 594 00:25:44,503 --> 00:25:46,046 Nordic walking poles with me. 595 00:25:46,129 --> 00:25:47,172 That's horrible! 596 00:25:47,256 --> 00:25:49,842 So... I take a picture. 597 00:25:49,925 --> 00:25:50,926 You did? 598 00:25:57,474 --> 00:25:58,475 [click] 599 00:25:58,767 --> 00:26:00,686 - Ugh! - I know. 600 00:26:00,853 --> 00:26:02,855 Oh, my God! 601 00:26:05,107 --> 00:26:06,316 The world around us 602 00:26:06,400 --> 00:26:08,110 reflects how we feel inside. 603 00:26:09,570 --> 00:26:10,612 Yeah. 604 00:26:11,822 --> 00:26:13,031 Then I remember... 605 00:26:14,283 --> 00:26:16,577 that I am master of my own destiny. 606 00:26:17,494 --> 00:26:19,538 The I sit down, and I... 607 00:26:20,372 --> 00:26:21,373 close my eyes 608 00:26:21,456 --> 00:26:23,166 and I envision the perfect woman. 609 00:26:23,917 --> 00:26:25,252 Dear God, 610 00:26:25,586 --> 00:26:27,880 I pray that I may choose my life companion 611 00:26:27,963 --> 00:26:31,008 according to Thy law of perfect soul union. 612 00:26:31,216 --> 00:26:32,259 Amen. 613 00:26:33,886 --> 00:26:35,304 - [both laugh] - And then... 614 00:26:35,387 --> 00:26:36,805 and then I get this from you! 615 00:26:36,889 --> 00:26:38,932 - [both laugh] - I mean... 616 00:26:39,016 --> 00:26:40,434 This is amazing! 617 00:26:45,189 --> 00:26:47,357 [Vicky's voice] "I attract the perfect man." 618 00:26:47,441 --> 00:26:49,359 [panting] 619 00:26:49,735 --> 00:26:51,737 "I attract the perfect man." 620 00:26:52,404 --> 00:26:54,656 "My soul mate is here and now." 621 00:26:55,616 --> 00:26:57,075 Yes, I am. 622 00:26:57,409 --> 00:26:59,411 [romantic piano music] 623 00:27:08,086 --> 00:27:09,588 [both sigh] 624 00:27:10,339 --> 00:27:12,716 [alarm] 625 00:27:13,967 --> 00:27:15,469 - [Victoria moans] - I'm sorry. 626 00:27:15,594 --> 00:27:16,720 - [kissing] - [moans] 627 00:27:17,721 --> 00:27:19,723 [alarm] 628 00:27:21,350 --> 00:27:23,352 [groans] Way too early... 629 00:27:27,356 --> 00:27:29,149 ...but I got a plane to catch. 630 00:27:29,316 --> 00:27:31,318 [smooching] 631 00:27:34,988 --> 00:27:36,990 The early bird catches the worm. 632 00:27:37,157 --> 00:27:38,242 [laughs] 633 00:27:38,325 --> 00:27:39,326 Yeah. 634 00:27:39,493 --> 00:27:40,994 They consider too much the good luck 635 00:27:41,078 --> 00:27:42,829 of the early bird. 636 00:27:43,830 --> 00:27:45,666 The bad luck of the early worm. 637 00:27:46,083 --> 00:27:47,209 [laughs] 638 00:27:47,334 --> 00:27:49,169 [both laugh] 639 00:27:51,046 --> 00:27:53,048 [smooching] 640 00:28:00,222 --> 00:28:01,431 [sighs] 641 00:28:03,267 --> 00:28:05,060 Ooh! [laughs] 642 00:28:07,813 --> 00:28:09,815 - [smooching] - Gotta go. It's late. 643 00:28:10,899 --> 00:28:12,901 Oh, that's a big sack! [laughs] 644 00:28:13,318 --> 00:28:14,945 [traffic noise] 645 00:28:15,445 --> 00:28:16,738 All right! 646 00:28:17,155 --> 00:28:18,156 [smooch] 647 00:28:18,448 --> 00:28:19,658 I got a part of you. 648 00:28:19,741 --> 00:28:21,034 I'm protected. 649 00:28:21,201 --> 00:28:23,203 [birds chirping] 650 00:28:28,208 --> 00:28:29,209 Ooh! 651 00:28:29,334 --> 00:28:30,627 [in Spanish] Hello, my queen of tango 652 00:28:31,295 --> 00:28:32,713 I look forward to hours, 653 00:28:32,921 --> 00:28:36,508 days, years and a life together, 654 00:28:36,592 --> 00:28:41,346 maybe universes we can experience together. 655 00:28:41,805 --> 00:28:43,807 Ich kuesse deine Seele, mein Schatz. 656 00:28:44,266 --> 00:28:45,726 I kiss your soul, my heart. 657 00:28:46,310 --> 00:28:47,311 [giggles] 658 00:28:47,436 --> 00:28:48,854 It's so amazing! 659 00:28:50,063 --> 00:28:51,607 And we didn't even have sex. 660 00:28:51,690 --> 00:28:53,400 That is amazing! 661 00:28:54,568 --> 00:28:55,903 What's wrong with him? 662 00:28:56,111 --> 00:28:57,196 Nothing! 663 00:28:57,321 --> 00:28:58,363 He really wants 664 00:28:58,447 --> 00:28:59,531 to get to know me first. 665 00:28:59,615 --> 00:29:01,408 He saw you with that frown tape? 666 00:29:01,533 --> 00:29:03,827 No! But he'd be impressed 667 00:29:03,911 --> 00:29:05,746 that I'm not messing up my body with Botox. 668 00:29:06,038 --> 00:29:07,414 [Vicky] We think very much alike. 669 00:29:07,664 --> 00:29:08,707 I'm sure. 670 00:29:08,832 --> 00:29:09,875 [laughs] 671 00:29:09,958 --> 00:29:11,376 It's better than a dream. 672 00:29:11,835 --> 00:29:13,837 Finally, a nice wholesome guy 673 00:29:14,087 --> 00:29:15,964 He has such a strong set of teeth! 674 00:29:16,548 --> 00:29:17,633 - [laughs] - [Skype rings] 675 00:29:17,716 --> 00:29:19,718 Oh, it's him! Oh, my God! 676 00:29:20,677 --> 00:29:21,720 [scuttling] 677 00:29:22,596 --> 00:29:24,306 [Vicky] Oh, my God! 678 00:29:29,228 --> 00:29:30,229 - [exclaims] - [whack] 679 00:29:30,479 --> 00:29:31,647 Are you all right? 680 00:29:31,939 --> 00:29:33,941 Oh! [laughs] 681 00:29:34,233 --> 00:29:35,901 Uh... hold on a sec, please. 682 00:29:40,364 --> 00:29:42,032 Look! It's fake! 683 00:29:42,324 --> 00:29:43,367 [laughs] Look! 684 00:29:45,369 --> 00:29:47,871 [laughs] It's stuff like that 685 00:29:48,872 --> 00:29:51,041 that makes me think of you all the time. 686 00:29:51,583 --> 00:29:53,585 I think of you all the time. 687 00:29:53,669 --> 00:29:55,087 I just sent you a shooting star. 688 00:29:55,170 --> 00:29:56,171 Did you get it? 689 00:29:56,380 --> 00:29:57,464 Um... 690 00:29:57,673 --> 00:29:59,007 there's a high rise building... 691 00:29:59,132 --> 00:30:01,301 but I'm sure there was a shooting star. 692 00:30:01,468 --> 00:30:02,553 [clanging] 693 00:30:02,678 --> 00:30:04,054 - [bear growling] - [man] Ho, ho, Mischka! 694 00:30:04,680 --> 00:30:06,181 That's one of my colleagues. 695 00:30:06,431 --> 00:30:07,891 Bears on skis? 696 00:30:08,058 --> 00:30:11,186 [laughs] On double blades! 697 00:30:11,436 --> 00:30:12,479 [laughs] 698 00:30:12,604 --> 00:30:14,606 I can't wait to see you again. 699 00:30:14,731 --> 00:30:16,275 I'm so horny, 700 00:30:17,276 --> 00:30:20,237 I'm taking you to bed with me right now. 701 00:30:23,490 --> 00:30:25,284 [sighs] 702 00:30:30,247 --> 00:30:33,458 [rustling] 703 00:30:36,128 --> 00:30:37,713 [knocking] 704 00:30:42,092 --> 00:30:43,135 Who? 705 00:30:43,510 --> 00:30:44,887 It's me. 706 00:30:48,140 --> 00:30:49,641 - Hello! - Hey. 707 00:30:50,684 --> 00:30:52,227 I'd like to wish you good luck 708 00:30:52,311 --> 00:30:53,979 with the big ham. 709 00:30:54,062 --> 00:30:56,190 Thank you, but don't make a bid deal of it. 710 00:30:56,356 --> 00:30:57,441 Especially because nobody 711 00:30:57,524 --> 00:30:58,942 watched his interview, right? 712 00:30:59,693 --> 00:31:00,986 Can you be a dear and grab this? 713 00:31:01,069 --> 00:31:02,196 Sure. 714 00:31:02,321 --> 00:31:04,489 - [knocking] - Hmm? 715 00:31:06,033 --> 00:31:07,284 Who is it? 716 00:31:07,367 --> 00:31:08,911 [Max] Your soul mate! 717 00:31:10,579 --> 00:31:12,206 How do I look? 718 00:31:12,331 --> 00:31:13,916 [Max] Babushka! 719 00:31:16,126 --> 00:31:18,128 - [laughs] - Frau Riefenstahl, 720 00:31:18,212 --> 00:31:20,797 - the filmmaker. - No paparazzi, please! 721 00:31:20,881 --> 00:31:23,258 [squeals] No! 722 00:31:26,637 --> 00:31:28,138 - [thud] - Wait, wait, wait! 723 00:31:28,263 --> 00:31:30,766 [laughs] Wait! Oh, my God! 724 00:31:31,266 --> 00:31:32,559 What happened to your head? 725 00:31:32,768 --> 00:31:33,852 I got shot out of a cannon 726 00:31:33,936 --> 00:31:35,437 and landed on a bear. 727 00:31:35,771 --> 00:31:37,689 [Vicky] Oh, it's not funny, come on. 728 00:31:38,315 --> 00:31:40,609 [Max] Unfortunately, he tore up your hat. 729 00:31:40,901 --> 00:31:42,277 Is the bear still alive? 730 00:31:43,403 --> 00:31:45,781 Enzo, the bear could've mauled him to death. 731 00:31:46,406 --> 00:31:48,909 Okay, well, I'm on my way. 732 00:31:49,493 --> 00:31:51,995 No, no, no, I can take that. 733 00:31:52,120 --> 00:31:54,122 All right, all right, you take the trash. 734 00:31:56,542 --> 00:31:57,793 [Enzo clears throat] 735 00:32:04,800 --> 00:32:06,802 [clunking] 736 00:32:12,641 --> 00:32:15,644 [smooching] 737 00:32:17,396 --> 00:32:19,314 It's Christmas time! 738 00:32:22,317 --> 00:32:24,027 [both laugh] 739 00:32:25,821 --> 00:32:27,823 [both giggle] 740 00:32:28,490 --> 00:32:31,869 And the Ferrari of vegetable peelers. 741 00:32:32,077 --> 00:32:33,287 [laughs] 742 00:32:33,495 --> 00:32:35,038 [in German] Thank you, I can use it. 743 00:32:35,873 --> 00:32:37,875 [in German] Please speak English, 744 00:32:37,958 --> 00:32:39,418 I have to acclimatise myself. 745 00:32:39,501 --> 00:32:40,544 Okay. 746 00:32:46,592 --> 00:32:48,260 Knives! 747 00:32:48,385 --> 00:32:50,137 [laughs] You cook? 748 00:32:50,679 --> 00:32:51,680 Oh, yeah. 749 00:32:51,763 --> 00:32:53,140 You are the nurturing type. 750 00:32:55,350 --> 00:32:56,894 - Here. - I don't have a stove, though. 751 00:32:56,977 --> 00:32:58,228 My jerk of a landlord took it. 752 00:32:59,146 --> 00:33:00,314 Don't worry about that, 753 00:33:00,397 --> 00:33:01,648 I've got something much better for you. 754 00:33:01,773 --> 00:33:03,025 A vibrator. 755 00:33:03,108 --> 00:33:05,569 I mean a dehydrator. 756 00:33:05,652 --> 00:33:06,862 [both laugh] 757 00:33:07,112 --> 00:33:09,114 - You're a raw foodist? - [Max laughs] 758 00:33:13,619 --> 00:33:15,245 You bought a clothesline too? 759 00:33:15,579 --> 00:33:18,081 Ever heard of clothes-pin cookies? 760 00:33:18,415 --> 00:33:20,417 No, but I can't wait to find out. 761 00:33:20,542 --> 00:33:21,793 You will. 762 00:33:22,753 --> 00:33:24,755 - Oh, look! - Oh! 763 00:33:25,964 --> 00:33:27,633 - Let's try them on. - Okay. 764 00:33:31,720 --> 00:33:33,639 It's awesome! I love it! 765 00:33:41,104 --> 00:33:44,483 [both laugh] 766 00:33:46,568 --> 00:33:47,986 I love that jacket. You wore it 767 00:33:48,070 --> 00:33:49,238 on the red carpet, right? 768 00:33:49,488 --> 00:33:51,490 Yeah, Giorgio personally gifted it to me 769 00:33:51,615 --> 00:33:56,495 at the height of the Mallard mania. 770 00:33:58,997 --> 00:34:00,999 Giorgio, as in Giorgio Armani? 771 00:34:03,794 --> 00:34:04,878 Yeah. 772 00:34:09,007 --> 00:34:10,801 How did you get all of this through customs? 773 00:34:11,134 --> 00:34:12,886 That was the least of my problems. 774 00:34:12,970 --> 00:34:15,180 They asked me if I worked here illegally, 775 00:34:15,264 --> 00:34:17,307 since I came back so soon. 776 00:34:17,683 --> 00:34:18,767 What did you tell them? 777 00:34:18,892 --> 00:34:20,143 I told them that... 778 00:34:22,646 --> 00:34:25,899 I uh... came to see the love of my life. 779 00:34:27,776 --> 00:34:29,027 [plastic bubbles popping] 780 00:34:29,194 --> 00:34:30,487 [groans] 781 00:34:33,323 --> 00:34:34,992 [whistles] 782 00:34:43,375 --> 00:34:46,003 Shh... Close your eyes. 783 00:34:52,426 --> 00:34:53,677 [gasps] 784 00:34:54,094 --> 00:34:55,846 - [both laugh] - What? 785 00:34:59,308 --> 00:35:01,310 Ah! Is this... 786 00:35:01,518 --> 00:35:02,936 My world Championship medal. 787 00:35:03,228 --> 00:35:04,229 Wow! 788 00:35:04,521 --> 00:35:06,064 It looks better on you than on me. 789 00:35:06,398 --> 00:35:07,524 Mmm. 790 00:35:10,027 --> 00:35:12,404 [gnawing] 791 00:35:12,779 --> 00:35:14,198 - Mmm... - Mmm? 792 00:35:14,615 --> 00:35:15,657 Do you hear that? 793 00:35:15,741 --> 00:35:16,867 Hear what? 794 00:35:17,117 --> 00:35:18,202 The noise. 795 00:35:18,368 --> 00:35:19,536 [gnawing continues] 796 00:35:19,620 --> 00:35:21,955 I think it's coming from... from there. 797 00:35:22,039 --> 00:35:23,207 Uh... 798 00:35:23,665 --> 00:35:24,833 Can we look? 799 00:35:25,250 --> 00:35:26,418 I don't... think... 800 00:35:27,252 --> 00:35:29,254 [rustling] 801 00:35:33,467 --> 00:35:35,469 [clunking] 802 00:35:42,434 --> 00:35:44,102 - [screeching] - [Vicky exclaims and giggles] 803 00:35:44,269 --> 00:35:45,646 There's a big mouse! 804 00:35:45,771 --> 00:35:47,064 [giggles] 805 00:35:47,272 --> 00:35:48,774 Okay, give me the light. 806 00:35:52,653 --> 00:35:53,695 [Vicky] Be careful! 807 00:35:55,489 --> 00:35:57,491 - [screeching] - [Max] Ah, damn! 808 00:35:58,116 --> 00:35:59,743 I almost had it! 809 00:36:00,369 --> 00:36:02,204 [Max] He went out through a hole in the wall. 810 00:36:02,996 --> 00:36:03,997 [Max] Oh! 811 00:36:04,248 --> 00:36:05,457 [Vicky] Careful! It's dangerous 812 00:36:05,582 --> 00:36:06,875 to inhale mouse droppings. 813 00:36:07,084 --> 00:36:08,585 It's rat droppings! 814 00:36:10,212 --> 00:36:11,463 Doesn't matter. 815 00:36:12,965 --> 00:36:14,883 Give me a hammer and some nails. 816 00:36:17,594 --> 00:36:19,596 [rattling] 817 00:36:23,600 --> 00:36:24,643 Thank you. 818 00:36:30,607 --> 00:36:33,151 [hammering] 819 00:36:35,821 --> 00:36:37,823 [hammering continues] 820 00:36:39,116 --> 00:36:40,200 [Max] A little more... 821 00:36:40,325 --> 00:36:41,743 [hammering continues] 822 00:36:47,082 --> 00:36:48,375 [Vicky] It's so great to have a man 823 00:36:48,500 --> 00:36:49,751 around the house. 824 00:36:50,711 --> 00:36:52,671 It's great to have "moi" around the house. 825 00:36:52,921 --> 00:36:56,383 [sniffing] "Moi" needs a shower! Ahh! 826 00:36:56,508 --> 00:36:58,510 [both laugh] 827 00:36:58,719 --> 00:37:00,387 - [Vicky exclaims] - [Max growls] 828 00:37:00,888 --> 00:37:02,639 [Vicky giggles] 829 00:37:02,848 --> 00:37:05,309 [humming] 830 00:37:06,310 --> 00:37:09,563 [humming continues] 831 00:37:16,153 --> 00:37:18,155 [brushing] 832 00:37:19,823 --> 00:37:21,617 [Max continues humming] 833 00:37:23,160 --> 00:37:25,162 [brushing] 834 00:37:26,371 --> 00:37:28,207 [water splashing] 835 00:37:28,373 --> 00:37:29,833 [Max spits] 836 00:37:31,460 --> 00:37:33,462 [Max continues humming] 837 00:37:35,297 --> 00:37:38,300 [clanging] 838 00:37:39,676 --> 00:37:41,678 [slapping] 839 00:37:43,388 --> 00:37:46,642 [both humming] 840 00:37:47,309 --> 00:37:49,311 [humming] 841 00:37:51,438 --> 00:37:52,481 [smooches] 842 00:37:53,440 --> 00:37:54,858 [clanging] 843 00:37:56,193 --> 00:37:57,361 [Vicky laughs] 844 00:37:57,694 --> 00:37:59,404 Look, I found a special place 845 00:37:59,488 --> 00:38:00,531 for your medal. 846 00:38:02,032 --> 00:38:03,033 What's that? 847 00:38:03,575 --> 00:38:04,660 That... 848 00:38:05,035 --> 00:38:07,579 uh... that's Pedia, the penguin. 849 00:38:07,704 --> 00:38:09,998 My good luck charm from when I was a kid. 850 00:38:12,251 --> 00:38:13,585 Well, he looks familiar. 851 00:38:14,002 --> 00:38:16,755 [laughs] He was a ski jumper also. 852 00:38:16,839 --> 00:38:17,965 Really? 853 00:38:18,507 --> 00:38:19,591 Yeah. 854 00:38:19,716 --> 00:38:21,677 Pedia and I both faced challenges. 855 00:38:22,177 --> 00:38:24,012 As a girl I wasn't allowed to compete, 856 00:38:24,096 --> 00:38:25,973 and Pedia's jumbo ears slowed him down, 857 00:38:26,056 --> 00:38:27,766 which made him crash all the time. 858 00:38:28,392 --> 00:38:30,853 Then one day Ken broke his foot, 859 00:38:31,395 --> 00:38:34,690 Pedia jumped in and he won Olympic gold! 860 00:38:35,232 --> 00:38:37,234 Pedia did a lot better than I did. 861 00:38:38,068 --> 00:38:39,111 [Vicky] And he brought me 862 00:38:39,194 --> 00:38:40,946 my real life Olympic champion. 863 00:38:43,490 --> 00:38:44,783 [sighs] 864 00:38:46,743 --> 00:38:47,995 You are unusual. 865 00:38:49,079 --> 00:38:50,455 [Vicky] I was such a tomboy. 866 00:38:51,790 --> 00:38:53,000 And now... 867 00:38:54,668 --> 00:38:57,045 you are all woman. [Vicky sighs] 868 00:38:58,130 --> 00:39:00,132 [kiss] My mistress ice queen. 869 00:39:01,133 --> 00:39:04,386 - [Max growls] - Mmm... mistress. 870 00:39:05,137 --> 00:39:06,555 You're not married, are you? 871 00:39:06,930 --> 00:39:08,432 Happily divorced. 872 00:39:09,183 --> 00:39:11,435 Mmm... You're my ice prince. 873 00:39:11,685 --> 00:39:12,978 [both laugh] 874 00:39:13,437 --> 00:39:14,730 Anybody ever tell you 875 00:39:14,813 --> 00:39:16,815 you could've been a great skater. 876 00:39:17,691 --> 00:39:18,734 All the time. 877 00:39:18,901 --> 00:39:20,402 My mom, I mean, she... 878 00:39:22,029 --> 00:39:24,156 she made me take lessons, including ballet. 879 00:39:24,990 --> 00:39:26,283 But she never managed to turn me 880 00:39:26,366 --> 00:39:28,118 into a figure skating fruitcake. 881 00:39:29,119 --> 00:39:31,622 Hey, did you know that the Olympics... 882 00:39:32,748 --> 00:39:34,666 - were fixed? - No! 883 00:39:36,960 --> 00:39:38,962 The night before my Olympic competition... 884 00:39:40,088 --> 00:39:41,215 You know, this pretty Russian, 885 00:39:41,298 --> 00:39:42,925 I mean, a Russian official told me 886 00:39:43,008 --> 00:39:44,676 that it had been decided that... 887 00:39:46,136 --> 00:39:47,221 I was going to be fourth, 888 00:39:47,304 --> 00:39:48,347 even though I had beaten 889 00:39:48,430 --> 00:39:49,848 everyone at the World's before, 890 00:39:50,474 --> 00:39:52,017 including Benny Bennovitz. 891 00:39:53,644 --> 00:39:55,312 And then, the next day I ended up being... 892 00:39:55,395 --> 00:39:56,772 - Fourth. - And they claimed 893 00:39:56,855 --> 00:39:58,273 I had touched the ground 894 00:39:58,357 --> 00:39:59,942 ten inches before the fall line, 895 00:40:00,025 --> 00:40:01,235 which was total bullshit! 896 00:40:01,360 --> 00:40:02,736 That sucks! 897 00:40:04,112 --> 00:40:05,364 And Benny Bennovitz 898 00:40:05,614 --> 00:40:08,200 who has Pedia's nose, he got the gold. 899 00:40:10,077 --> 00:40:12,079 [romantic piano music] 900 00:40:12,704 --> 00:40:13,956 [Vicky sighs] 901 00:40:28,929 --> 00:40:30,931 [piano music continues] 902 00:40:35,018 --> 00:40:38,438 [both moan] 903 00:40:40,732 --> 00:40:42,734 [moaning continues] 904 00:40:46,238 --> 00:40:47,573 [gasps] 905 00:40:52,244 --> 00:40:54,705 Up till now I was living only for my daughters. 906 00:40:57,583 --> 00:40:58,750 But when the bear 907 00:40:58,834 --> 00:41:00,169 had my head in its fangs, 908 00:41:01,587 --> 00:41:02,629 it came to me. 909 00:41:02,713 --> 00:41:04,715 [romantic music continues] 910 00:41:05,090 --> 00:41:06,758 I don't want to live another minute 911 00:41:06,842 --> 00:41:07,885 without you. 912 00:41:08,552 --> 00:41:10,012 [Vicky sighs] 913 00:41:13,348 --> 00:41:14,725 May I penetrate you? 914 00:41:15,058 --> 00:41:16,268 [Vicky sighs in agreement] 915 00:41:20,022 --> 00:41:21,273 [moans] 916 00:41:21,940 --> 00:41:23,358 [Max groans] 917 00:41:24,943 --> 00:41:26,945 [music swells] 918 00:41:28,280 --> 00:41:30,282 [both gasping] 919 00:41:38,457 --> 00:41:40,459 [moaning and gasping continue] 920 00:41:48,800 --> 00:41:52,137 [music fades] 921 00:42:05,150 --> 00:42:06,235 [snap] 922 00:42:08,070 --> 00:42:09,279 [snap] 923 00:42:11,240 --> 00:42:13,242 [birds chirping] 924 00:42:18,956 --> 00:42:20,207 [giggles] 925 00:42:20,415 --> 00:42:22,209 - Don't be embarrassed. - [laughs] 926 00:42:22,709 --> 00:42:24,086 [laughs] 927 00:42:24,169 --> 00:42:26,046 I have these frown lines. 928 00:42:26,255 --> 00:42:27,631 I have them too! Look... 929 00:42:27,756 --> 00:42:28,924 I have a Christmas tree. 930 00:42:29,424 --> 00:42:31,009 [laughs] 931 00:42:33,053 --> 00:42:35,055 [smooching] 932 00:42:36,390 --> 00:42:37,850 Do you have silly dreams as well? 933 00:42:37,975 --> 00:42:39,142 Like what? 934 00:42:39,393 --> 00:42:40,686 I dreamed... 935 00:42:40,769 --> 00:42:43,689 I was riding an elephant all night long. 936 00:42:44,565 --> 00:42:46,400 It was a small elephant. 937 00:42:47,818 --> 00:42:50,279 - Very intelligent. - [laughs] 938 00:42:50,362 --> 00:42:51,780 He knew... 939 00:42:52,823 --> 00:42:54,199 He knew where to go. 940 00:42:54,366 --> 00:42:55,909 Oh, yeah. 941 00:42:56,076 --> 00:42:58,078 [both moan] 942 00:42:58,370 --> 00:43:00,205 [birds chirping] 943 00:43:00,372 --> 00:43:02,374 [whispers] Don't tough my butt. 944 00:43:04,042 --> 00:43:06,128 - Don't touch my butt! - Why? 945 00:43:06,587 --> 00:43:08,213 It's sore from all the riding. 946 00:43:08,422 --> 00:43:11,049 [both laugh] 947 00:43:15,220 --> 00:43:18,974 [smooching] 948 00:43:23,061 --> 00:43:24,313 [Max groans] 949 00:43:25,272 --> 00:43:29,151 Wow! A whole drawer all to myself! 950 00:43:29,234 --> 00:43:31,904 [laughs] That's all I could spare. 951 00:43:32,613 --> 00:43:34,072 Right, here. 952 00:43:34,323 --> 00:43:36,617 - Merci beaucoup. - De rien. 953 00:43:36,825 --> 00:43:38,827 Just let me check what... 954 00:43:39,411 --> 00:43:41,413 what have we got in here. 955 00:43:43,123 --> 00:43:45,209 Oh! Look! 956 00:43:45,501 --> 00:43:47,044 Oh, your twins. 957 00:43:47,586 --> 00:43:49,004 [Max] Mari and Kari. 958 00:43:49,796 --> 00:43:51,465 Haven't seen them in over two years. 959 00:43:52,591 --> 00:43:54,176 How can you stand being separated? 960 00:43:54,927 --> 00:43:57,095 'Cause my lying crazy ass ex 961 00:43:57,262 --> 00:43:58,722 threatened to tell the press 962 00:43:58,805 --> 00:44:00,015 that I molested them... 963 00:44:01,975 --> 00:44:03,268 just so the court would give her 964 00:44:03,352 --> 00:44:04,770 every penny I owned. 965 00:44:06,730 --> 00:44:08,649 But at least my little ones are provided for. 966 00:44:10,108 --> 00:44:13,278 They wonder why I swore off marriage. 967 00:44:25,916 --> 00:44:27,543 I wish we'd met ten years ago. 968 00:44:28,627 --> 00:44:29,795 Me too. 969 00:44:31,922 --> 00:44:33,507 We can still make up for it. 970 00:44:34,132 --> 00:44:35,342 How? 971 00:44:37,427 --> 00:44:40,305 We just live ten years longer than destined. 972 00:44:41,223 --> 00:44:42,683 - Right? - Mmm. 973 00:44:45,477 --> 00:44:46,895 [Vicky] I have something for you. 974 00:44:47,104 --> 00:44:48,480 [clang] 975 00:44:50,816 --> 00:44:52,818 [rustling of paper] 976 00:44:55,153 --> 00:44:56,405 What's that? 977 00:44:57,322 --> 00:44:58,699 To my soul mate? 978 00:45:07,457 --> 00:45:09,459 [rustling of paper] 979 00:45:10,294 --> 00:45:11,587 "Dear soul mate..." 980 00:45:12,963 --> 00:45:14,548 2007? 981 00:45:15,632 --> 00:45:17,259 "I'm so happy we found each other. 982 00:45:17,342 --> 00:45:18,802 We are both European. 983 00:45:19,469 --> 00:45:21,889 You are 5'10", a professional dancer 984 00:45:25,309 --> 00:45:26,852 or even an Olympian. 985 00:45:27,686 --> 00:45:29,479 We have one to two children 986 00:45:29,646 --> 00:45:31,648 and we live on Riverside Drive..." 987 00:45:34,359 --> 00:45:35,527 [Max] Wow! 988 00:45:36,904 --> 00:45:37,905 It feels like we've known 989 00:45:38,030 --> 00:45:39,364 each other for lifetimes. 990 00:45:40,657 --> 00:45:42,659 - Is that too much? - No. 991 00:45:42,826 --> 00:45:44,161 - No? - No. 992 00:45:45,537 --> 00:45:47,539 We'll raise our one to two children... 993 00:45:48,624 --> 00:45:49,750 on Riverside Drive, 994 00:45:49,917 --> 00:45:51,126 And if I have to bag groceries 995 00:45:51,251 --> 00:45:52,878 at Trader Joe's... 996 00:45:53,962 --> 00:45:55,255 we'll do it. 997 00:45:56,256 --> 00:45:57,549 [both sniffing] 998 00:45:57,799 --> 00:45:59,343 I'll do it. 999 00:46:04,348 --> 00:46:06,725 My soul bows to your soul. 1000 00:46:07,059 --> 00:46:08,685 [both emotional] 1001 00:46:15,484 --> 00:46:17,486 This really is the Ferrari of peelers. 1002 00:46:18,737 --> 00:46:19,947 Max? 1003 00:46:20,072 --> 00:46:21,156 [male voice] You like it. 1004 00:46:21,281 --> 00:46:22,282 Answer me. [woman moans] 1005 00:46:22,407 --> 00:46:23,909 Check out Peter Black's camera work. 1006 00:46:23,992 --> 00:46:25,619 [male voice] ...understood? On your knees! 1007 00:46:25,702 --> 00:46:26,995 [woman moans] 1008 00:46:27,120 --> 00:46:28,747 [saxophone music] 1009 00:46:29,998 --> 00:46:32,376 See how blatantly he positions the lights? 1010 00:46:32,709 --> 00:46:34,127 - Mmm. - Cool, huh? 1011 00:46:34,253 --> 00:46:35,879 [woman continues moaning] 1012 00:46:36,046 --> 00:46:37,214 [man groans] 1013 00:46:37,297 --> 00:46:38,966 See the reflection in their pupils... 1014 00:46:39,132 --> 00:46:41,134 [moaning continues] 1015 00:46:41,301 --> 00:46:42,928 except those tramps don't have your beauty 1016 00:46:43,053 --> 00:46:45,722 and fluidity from years of dance. 1017 00:46:48,559 --> 00:46:49,852 I'm gonna make lunch. 1018 00:46:55,440 --> 00:46:57,442 [peeling] 1019 00:47:03,782 --> 00:47:05,242 Vicky! 1020 00:47:05,450 --> 00:47:07,828 [Vicky exclaims] Oh, my God! Are you okay? 1021 00:47:08,245 --> 00:47:09,746 More than okay. I... 1022 00:47:11,331 --> 00:47:12,666 Will you marry me? 1023 00:47:12,833 --> 00:47:14,459 What... did you say? 1024 00:47:14,543 --> 00:47:15,627 Will you... 1025 00:47:17,754 --> 00:47:19,006 Yes, I will! 1026 00:47:20,841 --> 00:47:22,217 Oh, my God! 1027 00:47:23,927 --> 00:47:25,387 [laughs nervously] 1028 00:47:26,180 --> 00:47:27,639 When I get my green card, 1029 00:47:28,015 --> 00:47:30,017 I'll replace it with a real diamond. 1030 00:47:30,517 --> 00:47:31,518 It is beautiful! 1031 00:47:31,602 --> 00:47:32,644 Most people don't know 1032 00:47:32,728 --> 00:47:33,729 the difference anyway, right? 1033 00:47:34,313 --> 00:47:36,773 You have a three-carat ring. 1034 00:47:36,857 --> 00:47:38,025 [laughs] 1035 00:47:38,400 --> 00:47:40,402 - [laughs] - [crunching] 1036 00:47:41,570 --> 00:47:42,905 [smooching] 1037 00:47:43,405 --> 00:47:44,823 Frau Bauer. 1038 00:47:45,532 --> 00:47:46,575 Frau Bauer. 1039 00:47:47,993 --> 00:47:49,995 [upbeat swing music] 1040 00:47:50,204 --> 00:47:52,206 [traffic noise] 1041 00:47:57,628 --> 00:47:59,004 [Max] Yeah! 1042 00:47:59,588 --> 00:48:03,842 Okay, and ready... go! 1043 00:48:05,052 --> 00:48:06,553 [Max] Nice! 1044 00:48:07,012 --> 00:48:08,931 Beautiful! Okay! 1045 00:48:10,599 --> 00:48:11,767 [Vicky laughs] 1046 00:48:12,059 --> 00:48:14,061 [swing music continues] 1047 00:48:30,077 --> 00:48:32,871 Wow! In America money lies on the street. 1048 00:48:33,372 --> 00:48:34,414 [laughs] 1049 00:48:35,415 --> 00:48:36,542 This brings my penny count to... 1050 00:48:36,625 --> 00:48:38,210 - you're funny! - 22 cents! 1051 00:48:40,128 --> 00:48:41,380 For the groceries. 1052 00:48:41,964 --> 00:48:43,549 A penny saved... 1053 00:48:43,674 --> 00:48:45,467 ...makes us less enslaved! 1054 00:48:45,551 --> 00:48:47,094 [both laugh] 1055 00:48:48,637 --> 00:48:49,805 That stupid dog show 1056 00:48:49,930 --> 00:48:51,932 did a number on my image. 1057 00:48:53,684 --> 00:48:55,018 I can't believe it. Look. 1058 00:48:57,646 --> 00:48:59,731 "The aging star athlete, Max, the Mallard 1059 00:48:59,815 --> 00:49:01,358 has been pathetically chasing the limelight 1060 00:49:01,441 --> 00:49:04,278 by fighting dogs for grubs..." 1061 00:49:04,403 --> 00:49:05,863 That's not true. You're a vegan. 1062 00:49:05,946 --> 00:49:07,281 Just wait until they hear 1063 00:49:07,364 --> 00:49:08,866 about my success in New York. 1064 00:49:09,575 --> 00:49:10,784 They'll kiss my ass. 1065 00:49:10,868 --> 00:49:12,160 Our wedding will be a... 1066 00:49:12,369 --> 00:49:13,871 positive status update. 1067 00:49:14,162 --> 00:49:15,831 No, no, don't post anything yet. 1068 00:49:16,373 --> 00:49:18,292 It needs to be carefully orchestrated. 1069 00:49:19,168 --> 00:49:20,210 We can have our wedding 1070 00:49:20,335 --> 00:49:21,545 with tabloids and whole shebang later, 1071 00:49:21,628 --> 00:49:23,255 but first I wanna find a project 1072 00:49:23,380 --> 00:49:24,840 that shows me on the upswing. 1073 00:49:25,007 --> 00:49:29,011 Right? Like a... like a reality show? 1074 00:49:30,012 --> 00:49:32,222 Maybe you can sell 1075 00:49:32,472 --> 00:49:33,849 Tupperware on the slopes 1076 00:49:33,932 --> 00:49:35,100 and I can come flying... 1077 00:49:35,184 --> 00:49:36,226 What about a modern version 1078 00:49:36,310 --> 00:49:37,728 of "The Frog Prince"? 1079 00:49:37,811 --> 00:49:40,063 - Frog prince"? - The "Snail Princess". 1080 00:49:40,314 --> 00:49:41,899 A lonely guy names Hans 1081 00:49:42,065 --> 00:49:43,317 can't get a date. 1082 00:49:43,442 --> 00:49:46,820 - He has literally two left feet. - [laughs] 1083 00:49:47,070 --> 00:49:48,405 The irony, right, the world champion 1084 00:49:48,488 --> 00:49:49,573 - with two left feet? - [Vicky laughs] 1085 00:49:49,948 --> 00:49:51,575 [Vicky] So, one day a good fairy appears, 1086 00:49:51,700 --> 00:49:55,913 and she tells him if he kisses a snail 1087 00:49:56,038 --> 00:49:57,748 despite his mollusk-phobia, 1088 00:49:57,873 --> 00:49:58,916 it will turn it into a princess 1089 00:49:58,999 --> 00:50:00,167 with two right feet. 1090 00:50:00,918 --> 00:50:02,461 Because you always have to be right. 1091 00:50:02,920 --> 00:50:03,962 [laughs] 1092 00:50:04,087 --> 00:50:06,507 She's the right one. It's a metaphor! 1093 00:50:06,590 --> 00:50:07,591 Okay, go on. 1094 00:50:07,758 --> 00:50:09,176 [Vicky] And then they go into the park, 1095 00:50:09,259 --> 00:50:11,136 - and then there's a tractor - [screaming] 1096 00:50:11,261 --> 00:50:13,263 - [crash] - and it cuts off one foot each. 1097 00:50:13,639 --> 00:50:15,933 [Max] I'm Hans, and who is she, who is Vicky? 1098 00:50:16,141 --> 00:50:17,601 [Max] It's great! Hans and Heidi... 1099 00:50:17,684 --> 00:50:18,727 - [Vicky] Right! - [Max] It's fantastic! 1100 00:50:18,810 --> 00:50:19,895 [Vicky] The hospital switches 1101 00:50:19,978 --> 00:50:21,104 their feet by mistake, see, 1102 00:50:21,188 --> 00:50:22,189 and then they end up 1103 00:50:22,272 --> 00:50:23,357 with each other's foot. 1104 00:50:25,400 --> 00:50:26,485 Who are you? 1105 00:50:26,652 --> 00:50:27,653 I'm Heidi. 1106 00:50:27,778 --> 00:50:28,779 I'm Hans. 1107 00:50:28,862 --> 00:50:30,405 - [Heidi gasps] - [Hans groans] 1108 00:50:30,781 --> 00:50:32,991 - Oh, my foot! - And my foot! 1109 00:50:33,867 --> 00:50:35,202 [Heidi sobs] 1110 00:50:35,536 --> 00:50:36,662 Where do you live? 1111 00:50:36,828 --> 00:50:38,830 [ambulance sirens in background] 1112 00:50:39,081 --> 00:50:40,999 [Vicky] So, why the rude gesture? 1113 00:50:41,083 --> 00:50:42,084 [Max] Why I am being crude, I mean 1114 00:50:42,167 --> 00:50:43,710 the attachment of the new foot 1115 00:50:43,961 --> 00:50:45,462 causes him to have side-effects. 1116 00:50:45,587 --> 00:50:47,089 It makes him want to constantly... 1117 00:50:47,756 --> 00:50:48,924 [swoosh] 1118 00:50:49,466 --> 00:50:50,551 flip the bird! 1119 00:50:51,552 --> 00:50:52,553 - [swoosh] - I'm not sure 1120 00:50:52,636 --> 00:50:54,054 if that's gonna go over well. 1121 00:50:54,137 --> 00:50:55,347 We're disagreeing again. 1122 00:50:55,514 --> 00:50:57,099 But darling, don't we want the audience 1123 00:50:57,182 --> 00:50:59,309 that disability is not a handicap 1124 00:50:59,393 --> 00:51:01,228 as long as they love each other. 1125 00:51:01,311 --> 00:51:02,980 But flipping the bird 1126 00:51:03,063 --> 00:51:04,731 has truly medicinal benefits. 1127 00:51:04,815 --> 00:51:06,108 I mean, don't you get it? 1128 00:51:06,567 --> 00:51:08,068 It helps them to work through 1129 00:51:08,151 --> 00:51:09,653 their childhood trauma, 1130 00:51:10,237 --> 00:51:11,405 and... and it clears 1131 00:51:12,531 --> 00:51:14,157 your head of the cobwebs 1132 00:51:14,241 --> 00:51:17,411 that the bosses, politicians and pundits 1133 00:51:17,703 --> 00:51:19,121 spin with their tired words 1134 00:51:19,204 --> 00:51:21,999 and useless clichés, blah, blah, blah. 1135 00:51:22,207 --> 00:51:24,084 Yeah? So march... 1136 00:51:24,585 --> 00:51:25,919 Yeah? 1137 00:51:26,003 --> 00:51:27,754 ...to the beat of your own drum. 1138 00:51:28,463 --> 00:51:35,429 Katchoonk, katchoonk, katchoonk, katchoonk. 1139 00:51:36,346 --> 00:51:39,474 Leap before you look! 1140 00:51:39,641 --> 00:51:43,645 Dance as if everybody is watching! 1141 00:51:43,854 --> 00:51:47,357 [Bavarian brass band music] 1142 00:51:48,150 --> 00:51:49,401 Fuck you! 1143 00:51:50,944 --> 00:51:52,613 Fuck you! 1144 00:51:56,783 --> 00:51:59,536 [Bavarian brass band continues] 1145 00:52:02,331 --> 00:52:03,707 [screams] 1146 00:52:03,832 --> 00:52:05,375 [screams] 1147 00:52:07,419 --> 00:52:09,421 [Bavarian brass band continues] 1148 00:52:12,090 --> 00:52:13,467 Fuck you! 1149 00:52:27,606 --> 00:52:30,400 [music crescendo] 1150 00:52:31,944 --> 00:52:35,989 [music ends] 1151 00:52:36,448 --> 00:52:37,574 [Max] Their dance of love 1152 00:52:37,658 --> 00:52:39,368 gets a million hits on You Tube. 1153 00:52:39,868 --> 00:52:42,204 A producer offers him a reality show. 1154 00:52:42,538 --> 00:52:44,164 It pays a cool million bucks. 1155 00:52:44,373 --> 00:52:46,166 The format is humiliating. 1156 00:52:46,625 --> 00:52:47,751 At first they want to take it, 1157 00:52:47,876 --> 00:52:48,877 but then they decide 1158 00:52:48,961 --> 00:52:51,213 not to sell their souls. 1159 00:52:51,797 --> 00:52:53,090 And then the producers can't believe 1160 00:52:53,173 --> 00:52:54,383 that they would turn down a million bucks, 1161 00:52:54,466 --> 00:52:55,467 right? 1162 00:52:55,926 --> 00:52:58,387 For the last time they dance, they're now famous. 1163 00:52:58,679 --> 00:53:01,348 "Fuck you, Mozart" -dance! 1164 00:53:01,598 --> 00:53:02,641 [laughs] 1165 00:53:02,975 --> 00:53:06,603 [Max] And then we'll see them 1166 00:53:06,979 --> 00:53:08,981 driving off in his Volkswagen. 1167 00:53:09,481 --> 00:53:12,526 We only see Hans' middle finger 1168 00:53:13,068 --> 00:53:14,653 out of the sunroof. 1169 00:53:14,862 --> 00:53:16,738 - [typing] - And then... 1170 00:53:17,447 --> 00:53:19,449 thy live happily forever after 1171 00:53:20,033 --> 00:53:22,911 - in her castle on the hill. - [smooch] 1172 00:53:25,747 --> 00:53:26,999 And then... 1173 00:53:27,708 --> 00:53:29,376 I can say "fuck you" 1174 00:53:29,459 --> 00:53:30,878 to the "Gone to the Dogs" producers, 1175 00:53:31,086 --> 00:53:33,297 because, guess who's top dog now? 1176 00:53:33,547 --> 00:53:34,673 Yeah! 1177 00:53:34,798 --> 00:53:36,800 [rattling] 1178 00:53:37,885 --> 00:53:40,053 - [doorbell rings] - I'm home! 1179 00:53:41,388 --> 00:53:43,390 - Hi! - Hi, neighbour. How's it going? 1180 00:53:43,515 --> 00:53:46,435 You moved in with Rhoda? 1181 00:53:47,269 --> 00:53:49,146 No! She has a loft in Dumbo now. 1182 00:53:49,396 --> 00:53:51,398 - Oh! - Some jerk encouraged her 1183 00:53:51,481 --> 00:53:52,900 to become a painter. 1184 00:53:52,983 --> 00:53:55,736 Some "leap before you look" kind of nonsense. 1185 00:53:55,819 --> 00:53:57,112 I'm sorry. 1186 00:53:57,696 --> 00:53:59,114 She should've stuck to singing. 1187 00:53:59,489 --> 00:54:01,074 [Lando] I could've gotten her on The Voice. 1188 00:54:02,034 --> 00:54:04,036 Well, I hope you find someone more deserving. 1189 00:54:04,369 --> 00:54:05,871 Cheers. 1190 00:54:07,247 --> 00:54:10,000 - [doorbell rings] - It's me again. 1191 00:54:10,959 --> 00:54:13,128 - [scuttling] - [sighs] 1192 00:54:16,381 --> 00:54:18,383 [hums] 1193 00:54:21,136 --> 00:54:23,138 [traffic noise] 1194 00:54:25,307 --> 00:54:28,227 [rattling] 1195 00:54:28,894 --> 00:54:30,896 [slurping] 1196 00:54:31,230 --> 00:54:33,232 [door opens] 1197 00:54:35,692 --> 00:54:37,694 How long does it take you to come upstairs? 1198 00:54:37,861 --> 00:54:40,113 I ran into Lando, our new neighbour. 1199 00:54:40,572 --> 00:54:43,075 I heard. Another rat showed up. 1200 00:54:43,450 --> 00:54:44,576 - Oh, no! - Yeah. 1201 00:54:44,660 --> 00:54:46,078 The exterminator was here 1202 00:54:46,203 --> 00:54:48,205 and put down snap traps. Here is the bill. 1203 00:54:48,830 --> 00:54:50,582 I'll take care of it. 1204 00:54:51,458 --> 00:54:52,876 Watch those traps. 1205 00:54:53,210 --> 00:54:54,920 Knowing you, you'll step right in. 1206 00:54:55,796 --> 00:54:59,925 Oh, your mom's been on Skype all day. 1207 00:55:00,467 --> 00:55:02,052 You're telling me now? 1208 00:55:07,391 --> 00:55:08,642 [Skype rings] 1209 00:55:09,101 --> 00:55:10,394 Hello, Mutti. 1210 00:55:12,229 --> 00:55:13,230 I'm leaving. 1211 00:55:13,313 --> 00:55:14,648 Where you going? 1212 00:55:14,731 --> 00:55:16,191 Uh, friends from Europe, 1213 00:55:16,316 --> 00:55:18,527 some art gallery thing. 1214 00:55:18,610 --> 00:55:20,320 Wait, I have to take a shower first. 1215 00:55:20,404 --> 00:55:22,239 [Max] No, stay here, it won't take long. 1216 00:55:22,322 --> 00:55:23,323 [Victoria] Max... 1217 00:55:23,407 --> 00:55:25,742 Please say hi to your future mother-in-law? 1218 00:55:25,826 --> 00:55:26,827 Say hi to what? 1219 00:55:26,910 --> 00:55:28,453 Max proposed! 1220 00:55:28,537 --> 00:55:30,497 [Victoria] Mutti, Max Bauer, in the flesh! 1221 00:55:32,082 --> 00:55:34,126 And Max... this is my mom! 1222 00:55:36,044 --> 00:55:37,045 Hello Ms... 1223 00:55:37,129 --> 00:55:38,130 Marta! 1224 00:55:38,213 --> 00:55:39,214 Ms. Marta. 1225 00:55:39,840 --> 00:55:41,466 Don't we make a beautiful couple? 1226 00:55:41,550 --> 00:55:45,679 I guess, I'll put a notice in the Liechtensteiner Volksblatt! 1227 00:55:45,762 --> 00:55:46,763 No don't! 1228 00:55:47,681 --> 00:55:50,767 [Victoria] Max means he needs to establish himself first. 1229 00:55:50,851 --> 00:55:52,686 Isn't he established enough? 1230 00:55:55,147 --> 00:55:56,273 Are we good? 1231 00:55:59,193 --> 00:56:00,194 [kiss] 1232 00:56:03,155 --> 00:56:04,781 [Mom] Indian cress. 1233 00:56:08,827 --> 00:56:10,954 You planted it in your little garden, 1234 00:56:11,038 --> 00:56:12,414 By the swing. 1235 00:56:12,497 --> 00:56:15,792 Do you remember what the neighbors boys... did? 1236 00:56:15,876 --> 00:56:17,377 [Victoria] They ripped them out! 1237 00:56:17,461 --> 00:56:18,712 [Mom] And what did you do? 1238 00:56:18,795 --> 00:56:20,380 I grabbed a stick, 1239 00:56:20,464 --> 00:56:22,841 and threatened to beat the crap out of them! 1240 00:56:22,925 --> 00:56:26,386 [Mom choking] You were a very gutsy little girl! 1241 00:56:27,095 --> 00:56:28,096 And now... 1242 00:56:28,180 --> 00:56:31,225 [Victoria] Look...! what I snagged at Century 21! 1243 00:56:31,391 --> 00:56:32,768 [Mom] I just talked to... 1244 00:56:32,851 --> 00:56:34,853 Frau Ohry, my neighbour... 1245 00:56:34,937 --> 00:56:38,315 I got it for $79, but it used to be 800! 1246 00:56:38,982 --> 00:56:41,818 [Mom] not only did her son-in-law, 1247 00:56:41,902 --> 00:56:44,905 suffer a fatal mountain climbing accident... 1248 00:56:44,988 --> 00:56:47,157 - You already told me that story. - [Mom] but... 1249 00:56:47,241 --> 00:56:48,742 her daughter... 1250 00:56:48,825 --> 00:56:52,788 jumped to her death from the 5th floor with her baby. 1251 00:56:52,871 --> 00:56:54,790 How do you like the dress? 1252 00:56:54,873 --> 00:56:58,752 Frau Ohry's daughter always acted on impulse. 1253 00:57:01,046 --> 00:57:03,966 For 20 years you pestered me to get married! 1254 00:57:04,049 --> 00:57:08,554 And now you're marrying some guy you don't even know! 1255 00:57:08,637 --> 00:57:11,473 He's not, "some guy", he's Max Bauer! 1256 00:57:11,557 --> 00:57:13,141 Send me pictures of the wedding. 1257 00:57:13,225 --> 00:57:15,018 We'll come celebrate in Liechtenstein, 1258 00:57:15,102 --> 00:57:16,395 once Max gets on his feet. 1259 00:57:16,478 --> 00:57:18,647 He doesn't have any money! 1260 00:57:18,730 --> 00:57:19,731 His ex took it. 1261 00:57:19,815 --> 00:57:21,483 Sounds fishy! 1262 00:57:21,692 --> 00:57:23,986 You just won't believe that a huge sport's star, 1263 00:57:24,069 --> 00:57:26,488 would marry a nobody, with a tiny rental apartment. 1264 00:57:26,572 --> 00:57:29,741 You mean, an award-winning filmmaker, 1265 00:57:29,825 --> 00:57:32,786 who's taking care of some guy who's broke? 1266 00:57:33,328 --> 00:57:34,746 He loves me! 1267 00:57:34,830 --> 00:57:36,999 You squeak when he's around! 1268 00:57:40,502 --> 00:57:41,503 [laptop closes] 1269 00:57:44,047 --> 00:57:46,258 You've been a bad, bad boy! 1270 00:57:47,551 --> 00:57:49,887 You've been a bad, bad boy. 1271 00:57:51,221 --> 00:57:53,515 You've been a bad, bad boy. 1272 00:57:55,517 --> 00:57:57,311 I should just punish you. 1273 00:57:58,228 --> 00:57:59,479 [door opening] 1274 00:58:06,069 --> 00:58:08,197 [peeing] 1275 00:58:12,618 --> 00:58:13,994 Hi honey. 1276 00:58:14,578 --> 00:58:17,164 - How was the gallery? - [Max] Boring 1277 00:58:20,209 --> 00:58:22,002 - [Victoria giggling] - [Max] Woof, woof! 1278 00:58:22,503 --> 00:58:25,589 - [gobbling sounds] - [both laughing happily] 1279 00:58:25,672 --> 00:58:26,882 [Victoria] Doggie! 1280 00:58:29,968 --> 00:58:31,136 You smell different! 1281 00:58:31,220 --> 00:58:32,221 [Max] I love you! 1282 00:58:32,304 --> 00:58:33,555 [Victoria] I love you too! 1283 00:58:33,639 --> 00:58:34,640 [Max] Ich liebe dich. 1284 00:58:35,224 --> 00:58:36,683 [Victoria] Ich liebe dich auch. 1285 00:58:36,767 --> 00:58:39,603 - [Max muttering] - [Victoria laughing] 1286 00:58:45,150 --> 00:58:46,151 I have a... 1287 00:58:47,152 --> 00:58:48,153 present for you. 1288 00:58:48,237 --> 00:58:49,363 [Victoria] Ooh! 1289 00:58:49,446 --> 00:58:50,489 [whispering] Surprise. 1290 00:58:50,572 --> 00:58:51,573 [Victoria] Yeah! 1291 00:58:55,786 --> 00:58:56,787 Oh! 1292 00:59:07,506 --> 00:59:08,632 [Victoria] That's yours! 1293 00:59:10,300 --> 00:59:11,385 Yeah! 1294 00:59:15,430 --> 00:59:17,266 [Victoria laughing] 1295 00:59:17,349 --> 00:59:19,226 [Max laughing] 1296 00:59:19,309 --> 00:59:20,561 You're crazy! 1297 00:59:20,644 --> 00:59:22,813 [Max] It's ass art! 1298 00:59:33,574 --> 00:59:36,285 [Max] Now it's your turn! 1299 00:59:37,536 --> 00:59:38,579 You're part of my... 1300 00:59:38,662 --> 00:59:43,417 great... new... art... 1301 00:59:43,876 --> 00:59:45,127 installation! 1302 00:59:45,210 --> 00:59:46,670 [Victoria giggling] 1303 00:59:46,753 --> 00:59:49,798 [Max humming] 1304 00:59:55,762 --> 00:59:56,805 And now... 1305 00:59:56,889 --> 00:59:58,015 I want you to get naked. 1306 00:59:58,098 --> 00:59:59,099 [Victoria] Hm? 1307 00:59:59,183 --> 01:00:00,309 And get in there. 1308 01:00:00,392 --> 01:00:01,393 In there? 1309 01:00:01,518 --> 01:00:02,519 Oh yeah! 1310 01:00:02,603 --> 01:00:04,771 Shouldn't you be capturing our movie footage? 1311 01:00:04,855 --> 01:00:07,900 First I have to nourish my soul, 1312 01:00:07,983 --> 01:00:09,109 like Dukchat. 1313 01:00:09,193 --> 01:00:10,194 Who? 1314 01:00:10,277 --> 01:00:12,946 The famous artist Dukchat. 1315 01:00:13,030 --> 01:00:14,948 You know Dukchat. 1316 01:00:15,699 --> 01:00:18,493 He... photographs... 1317 01:00:18,577 --> 01:00:21,955 15 year old girls... 1318 01:00:22,998 --> 01:00:24,333 in the nude. 1319 01:00:24,416 --> 01:00:26,668 And to make them feel more comfortable... 1320 01:00:26,752 --> 01:00:29,129 he also takes his pants off. 1321 01:00:30,005 --> 01:00:32,341 His dick hanging out makes them more comfortable? 1322 01:00:33,133 --> 01:00:35,886 He sends a message of being unconventional. 1323 01:00:36,512 --> 01:00:39,056 What message gets sent by trapping me in there? 1324 01:00:39,139 --> 01:00:40,641 It doesn't matter, 1325 01:00:40,724 --> 01:00:42,935 as long as it evokes a feeling from the viewer! 1326 01:00:43,227 --> 01:00:44,811 It's awfully tight! 1327 01:00:45,562 --> 01:00:47,022 An artist has got to be risqué. 1328 01:00:48,106 --> 01:00:49,816 Otherwise, he's just boring vanilla. 1329 01:00:50,692 --> 01:00:53,153 But the... deadline for Tribeca is coming up. 1330 01:00:54,696 --> 01:00:56,365 You and I rise above... 1331 01:00:56,448 --> 01:00:57,908 bourgeois convention. 1332 01:00:58,867 --> 01:01:01,870 Like we did it with our... switched-legs movie 1333 01:01:02,079 --> 01:01:03,622 What if I get stuck? 1334 01:01:03,705 --> 01:01:07,793 What does great art come out of, huh? Trauma? 1335 01:01:07,876 --> 01:01:10,546 But Mozart was inspired by birds singing. 1336 01:01:11,463 --> 01:01:13,841 Wagner was an egotistic maniac! 1337 01:01:15,050 --> 01:01:16,802 And Van Gogh had his ear cut off! 1338 01:01:17,344 --> 01:01:19,263 And Frida Kahlo, 1339 01:01:19,471 --> 01:01:22,057 she got pierced with a 10 foot pole through her vagina. 1340 01:01:22,975 --> 01:01:23,976 Trauma! 1341 01:01:24,059 --> 01:01:25,060 But... 1342 01:01:25,143 --> 01:01:27,396 if it falls I could break my bones! 1343 01:01:27,479 --> 01:01:28,772 [sighs] 1344 01:01:28,856 --> 01:01:31,733 Human existence is pain. 1345 01:01:32,943 --> 01:01:34,194 People relate to that. 1346 01:01:34,778 --> 01:01:36,947 What if my dance students see me like that... 1347 01:01:40,158 --> 01:01:41,243 Stop the petty shit, 1348 01:01:41,326 --> 01:01:42,744 and get in the box! 1349 01:01:46,748 --> 01:01:48,917 - [dramatic tango music] - [Max] Here we go, okay. 1350 01:01:49,418 --> 01:01:51,086 [Max] Great shot. Yeah! 1351 01:01:52,379 --> 01:01:54,506 Now imagine you're locked up like you are 1352 01:01:54,590 --> 01:01:56,341 and bang against the window. 1353 01:01:56,425 --> 01:01:57,593 As hard as you can! 1354 01:01:57,676 --> 01:01:59,678 [screaming] 1355 01:01:59,887 --> 01:02:02,681 Right, right. Like Jack Nicholson in "Shining" 1356 01:02:02,764 --> 01:02:04,224 [screaming] 1357 01:02:04,349 --> 01:02:06,185 Beautiful! It's awesome! 1358 01:02:06,268 --> 01:02:07,728 [Victoria] Okay, okay. I'm done 1359 01:02:07,811 --> 01:02:09,229 [Max] Okay, just a few more. 1360 01:02:10,355 --> 01:02:11,565 So good. 1361 01:02:13,192 --> 01:02:14,193 I mean it! 1362 01:02:19,156 --> 01:02:20,157 [cell phone rings] 1363 01:02:26,830 --> 01:02:27,831 Hello. 1364 01:02:27,915 --> 01:02:29,374 [Victoria] Get me out of this! 1365 01:02:30,000 --> 01:02:31,585 - I'm done! - [Max] It's Max Bauer... 1366 01:02:32,503 --> 01:02:34,213 Yes, "the" Max Bauer. 1367 01:02:34,338 --> 01:02:36,965 Okay, I'm working on an art project in New York. 1368 01:02:37,049 --> 01:02:38,050 Yes. 1369 01:02:38,133 --> 01:02:40,552 - [Victoria] I want to get out! - One moment please. 1370 01:02:40,636 --> 01:02:42,930 - [Max] It's Liechtenstein! - I don't give a shit! 1371 01:02:43,013 --> 01:02:45,557 [Max] Well then you don't want to talk to Vaduz Films. 1372 01:02:46,141 --> 01:02:47,142 Uh! 1373 01:02:47,309 --> 01:02:49,019 Just give me the fucking phone then! 1374 01:02:52,731 --> 01:02:53,732 Hello?... 1375 01:02:54,358 --> 01:02:55,359 Yeah... 1376 01:02:56,485 --> 01:02:57,611 The mayor? 1377 01:02:59,738 --> 01:03:04,743 Oh... Okay... that sounds great. Okay... thank you. 1378 01:03:05,077 --> 01:03:06,370 Okay, I'll talk to you then. 1379 01:03:08,539 --> 01:03:09,665 [Max] You see! 1380 01:03:11,333 --> 01:03:14,628 You open up possibilities, and the universe opens to you! 1381 01:03:17,422 --> 01:03:18,423 [door opens] 1382 01:03:18,966 --> 01:03:19,967 Hello. 1383 01:03:20,050 --> 01:03:21,051 [Victoria] Hello 1384 01:03:21,426 --> 01:03:22,427 [photographer] Wow! 1385 01:03:22,511 --> 01:03:23,512 [laughs] 1386 01:03:23,595 --> 01:03:24,888 [photographer] Look at you! 1387 01:03:25,597 --> 01:03:26,682 So Victoria... 1388 01:03:26,765 --> 01:03:27,766 [Victoria] Yeah... 1389 01:03:28,559 --> 01:03:31,103 [photographer] Today, is your actual wedding day? 1390 01:03:31,270 --> 01:03:32,271 Yeah! 1391 01:03:32,354 --> 01:03:34,189 [chuckles] He's in the limo downstairs. 1392 01:03:34,273 --> 01:03:37,401 - He's a famous ski-jumper! - [photographer] Okay... 1393 01:03:37,484 --> 01:03:39,111 We'll do this quickly then. 1394 01:03:39,528 --> 01:03:42,698 [Victoria] Great! I'm teaching Zumba at 5:30 and Salsa at 7:00! 1395 01:03:43,407 --> 01:03:45,742 That is one lucky groom! 1396 01:03:46,702 --> 01:03:47,703 Okay... 1397 01:03:48,620 --> 01:03:49,621 Ready? 1398 01:03:50,205 --> 01:03:52,291 [photographer] Slate please. 1399 01:03:52,374 --> 01:03:56,712 Hi, I'm Victoria Ti... Victoria Bauer. 1400 01:03:57,462 --> 01:03:58,463 One sec... 1401 01:03:59,298 --> 01:04:01,592 For a dazzling white smile that lasts. 1402 01:04:01,675 --> 01:04:03,594 Bright White toothpaste. 1403 01:04:03,927 --> 01:04:04,928 [camera clicks] 1404 01:04:06,597 --> 01:04:09,057 [photographer] I didn't realize you had an accent... 1405 01:04:09,141 --> 01:04:11,435 [German accent] Vot do you mean I have an akzent? 1406 01:04:11,518 --> 01:04:13,187 [both chuckle] 1407 01:04:13,645 --> 01:04:14,646 Thank you. 1408 01:04:14,730 --> 01:04:16,481 Thank you. 1409 01:04:18,275 --> 01:04:19,359 [door opens and closes] 1410 01:04:23,238 --> 01:04:24,823 [romantic accordion music] 1411 01:05:12,704 --> 01:05:14,039 Don't we look so great! 1412 01:05:15,374 --> 01:05:17,835 [Enzo] Why marry, when jumping in front of a train, 1413 01:05:17,918 --> 01:05:18,919 is faster and easier? 1414 01:05:19,002 --> 01:05:20,629 - Victoria and Max... - just kidding! 1415 01:05:20,712 --> 01:05:23,173 May your love grow stronger each day going forward... 1416 01:05:23,257 --> 01:05:25,008 not like the clown I'm stuck with... 1417 01:05:25,092 --> 01:05:26,885 - [Blanche squeals] - I'm not a clown! 1418 01:05:26,969 --> 01:05:28,345 [Enzo] Come on, give me this! 1419 01:05:28,887 --> 01:05:30,556 We look the way I always dreamed. 1420 01:05:37,229 --> 01:05:39,523 [Max] Enzo doesn't know what the hell he's doing! 1421 01:05:43,902 --> 01:05:44,987 I got something! 1422 01:05:47,281 --> 01:05:48,907 [Max puffing] 1423 01:05:50,075 --> 01:05:51,368 [Victoria giggles] 1424 01:05:55,038 --> 01:05:57,916 You're finally making those clothes pin cookies? 1425 01:06:05,382 --> 01:06:06,842 I feel bad for Blanche though. 1426 01:06:06,925 --> 01:06:08,135 [Max] Turn that shit off. 1427 01:06:09,178 --> 01:06:11,054 [Victoria] Is this the part where you... 1428 01:06:11,138 --> 01:06:12,389 [Max] Blanche ran into me! 1429 01:06:14,266 --> 01:06:15,267 [Blanche moans] 1430 01:06:15,350 --> 01:06:17,728 It almost looks like you flipped her on purpose... 1431 01:06:18,187 --> 01:06:20,814 It's instinct! Olympians are trained to follow through 1432 01:06:22,191 --> 01:06:24,610 What do you have... combat instincts at a wedding? 1433 01:06:24,902 --> 01:06:27,029 Did "you" act like this is a wedding huh? 1434 01:06:27,571 --> 01:06:29,907 I waited all day in a frickin rental car, 1435 01:06:29,990 --> 01:06:31,867 while you do your obsessions! 1436 01:06:32,618 --> 01:06:35,412 Max, can we please enjoy the biggest day of my life? 1437 01:06:35,495 --> 01:06:38,123 Of "your" life! What about my life? 1438 01:06:38,207 --> 01:06:40,709 Everything is about you and what Vicky needs! 1439 01:06:41,251 --> 01:06:43,212 I mean who schedules auditions and Zumba 1440 01:06:43,295 --> 01:06:44,630 around their wedding huh? 1441 01:06:46,423 --> 01:06:47,591 We need the money! 1442 01:06:51,386 --> 01:06:53,013 [dress rustles] 1443 01:06:59,728 --> 01:07:01,563 I'll make it up to you. 1444 01:07:05,400 --> 01:07:06,527 [Max gasps] 1445 01:07:11,198 --> 01:07:12,282 [laughs] 1446 01:07:19,456 --> 01:07:22,000 [femme fatale music] 1447 01:07:24,670 --> 01:07:25,671 [whip cracks] 1448 01:07:27,047 --> 01:07:30,175 You've been a bad, bad boy! 1449 01:07:30,884 --> 01:07:32,469 Aren't you going to punish me? 1450 01:07:32,553 --> 01:07:34,805 I should just hand cuff you to the bed, 1451 01:07:34,888 --> 01:07:36,598 and ride your face! 1452 01:07:38,308 --> 01:07:39,810 - [Max] Mercy on... - [cracks whip] 1453 01:07:39,893 --> 01:07:40,936 Mercy on me! 1454 01:07:41,019 --> 01:07:42,020 [laughing] 1455 01:07:42,104 --> 01:07:43,480 [laughing] I can't do this! 1456 01:07:43,564 --> 01:07:45,941 [Max] No, no it was fantastic! Just keep going! 1457 01:07:46,024 --> 01:07:48,193 I was a bad boy! 1458 01:07:48,277 --> 01:07:49,278 Here! 1459 01:08:20,225 --> 01:08:24,021 [in German] Boeser... boeser... Junge! 1460 01:08:24,104 --> 01:08:26,773 [Max mock chokes] Oh yes! 1461 01:08:33,238 --> 01:08:34,239 You okay? 1462 01:08:34,323 --> 01:08:35,908 [Max] Ja! Just do it! Just do it! 1463 01:08:36,450 --> 01:08:37,784 [Max screams] 1464 01:08:37,868 --> 01:08:38,869 You okay? 1465 01:08:38,952 --> 01:08:39,953 Yes! 1466 01:08:40,913 --> 01:08:41,914 [Max groans] 1467 01:08:45,417 --> 01:08:47,503 [Max] Go ride me! Come on! 1468 01:08:48,212 --> 01:08:49,254 [Max moans] 1469 01:08:52,090 --> 01:08:54,092 [Max] Ugh! Come on harder, hit me! 1470 01:08:54,176 --> 01:08:58,055 - I'm a bad boy! - [Victoria] Bad, bad boy! 1471 01:08:58,138 --> 01:09:00,098 [whipping] [Max] I'm a bad boy! Harder! 1472 01:09:00,182 --> 01:09:01,350 Come on go harder! 1473 01:09:01,433 --> 01:09:02,976 No! You really got to hit me! 1474 01:09:04,269 --> 01:09:05,312 I did! 1475 01:09:05,395 --> 01:09:06,396 [Max] No you didn't! 1476 01:09:07,231 --> 01:09:08,357 Okay, now it's my turn. 1477 01:09:10,192 --> 01:09:11,193 Sit! 1478 01:09:12,319 --> 01:09:13,320 Platz. 1479 01:09:14,655 --> 01:09:15,656 Bad girl. 1480 01:09:28,710 --> 01:09:29,711 You're kidding! 1481 01:09:32,005 --> 01:09:33,173 Can we kiss for a moment? 1482 01:09:35,801 --> 01:09:36,844 [Max] Hmm. 1483 01:09:38,095 --> 01:09:39,096 I guess not! 1484 01:09:40,138 --> 01:09:41,682 - Ouch! - You and your vanilla sex! 1485 01:09:42,558 --> 01:09:43,559 Ow! 1486 01:09:44,184 --> 01:09:45,185 [groans] 1487 01:09:47,980 --> 01:09:48,981 [gasps] 1488 01:09:51,191 --> 01:09:52,192 [Victoria] Ouch! 1489 01:09:52,609 --> 01:09:53,610 [pegs clicking] 1490 01:09:53,694 --> 01:09:55,362 [Victoria] Ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch! 1491 01:09:57,948 --> 01:10:00,284 [Victoria groaning] Ouch! 1492 01:10:00,367 --> 01:10:01,535 Yeah! 1493 01:10:01,910 --> 01:10:03,245 Okay, that is enough, right? 1494 01:10:03,328 --> 01:10:04,454 Two, two more! Two more! 1495 01:10:06,498 --> 01:10:07,499 [cries out] 1496 01:10:07,958 --> 01:10:08,959 Ouch. 1497 01:10:09,710 --> 01:10:11,503 [Victoria panting] 1498 01:10:11,795 --> 01:10:12,796 [Max] Ready? 1499 01:10:13,672 --> 01:10:14,756 Ah! 1500 01:10:15,674 --> 01:10:17,050 [Max] Last one! 1501 01:10:22,973 --> 01:10:23,974 [screams] Ow! 1502 01:10:24,141 --> 01:10:25,350 Ow! Look this is hurting! 1503 01:10:25,434 --> 01:10:26,435 Then use a safe word! 1504 01:10:26,643 --> 01:10:27,644 What's a safe word? 1505 01:10:27,728 --> 01:10:28,937 Phew! Are you twelve? 1506 01:10:30,522 --> 01:10:31,523 Gosh! 1507 01:10:32,983 --> 01:10:33,984 [footsteps] 1508 01:10:37,571 --> 01:10:38,572 [elastic snaps] 1509 01:10:39,656 --> 01:10:40,699 [chewing] 1510 01:10:45,746 --> 01:10:46,747 That... 1511 01:10:46,830 --> 01:10:47,831 should make it... 1512 01:10:48,999 --> 01:10:50,000 easier. 1513 01:10:51,793 --> 01:10:55,881 [Victoria] Yeah, broccoli always helps the situation. 1514 01:10:58,926 --> 01:10:59,927 Ow! 1515 01:11:04,389 --> 01:11:05,390 [thumps] 1516 01:11:19,988 --> 01:11:21,865 [crackling] 1517 01:11:25,953 --> 01:11:27,955 Um, ow! This can't be safe! 1518 01:11:30,749 --> 01:11:32,334 [Victoria] This can't be healthy. 1519 01:11:32,417 --> 01:11:33,752 Well, it could be worse. 1520 01:11:33,836 --> 01:11:37,089 It could... match the color of your eyes! 1521 01:11:37,506 --> 01:11:39,132 [Victoria] My eyes are blue! 1522 01:11:40,551 --> 01:11:42,135 Ow! Safe word. 1523 01:11:43,762 --> 01:11:45,305 [Victoria] Get it off! 1524 01:11:45,472 --> 01:11:46,515 Ow! 1525 01:11:46,974 --> 01:11:48,225 Ow-oo! 1526 01:11:48,809 --> 01:11:49,810 Take it off! 1527 01:11:51,270 --> 01:11:52,271 [thuds] 1528 01:11:52,354 --> 01:11:53,730 Take this stuff off. 1529 01:11:58,569 --> 01:12:00,571 I'm taking it off! Just relax! Come on. 1530 01:12:01,280 --> 01:12:02,489 Down there too! 1531 01:12:04,491 --> 01:12:05,534 [Max] Vanilla sex! 1532 01:12:09,621 --> 01:12:10,622 Ow! 1533 01:12:13,834 --> 01:12:14,835 [thuds] 1534 01:12:15,210 --> 01:12:16,670 This... this was interesting. 1535 01:12:16,753 --> 01:12:19,214 But I'm more partial to vanilla sex... 1536 01:12:19,298 --> 01:12:21,717 [Max] Don't ever stop in the middle okay! 1537 01:12:21,800 --> 01:12:23,552 No-one says "No" to Max Bauer! 1538 01:12:24,511 --> 01:12:27,139 You prude! I can have any woman I want! 1539 01:12:28,765 --> 01:12:29,766 [Max] Goodnight! 1540 01:12:30,684 --> 01:12:31,685 [door slams] 1541 01:12:34,563 --> 01:12:36,523 [sad piano music] 1542 01:13:26,073 --> 01:13:28,659 So, congratulations again, on the production contract! 1543 01:13:28,742 --> 01:13:31,036 Oh yeah, all our hard work paid off. 1544 01:13:31,745 --> 01:13:33,705 You must be so proud of Victoria! 1545 01:13:33,789 --> 01:13:36,500 I always tell Vicky not to talk about unlaid eggs. 1546 01:13:36,917 --> 01:13:37,918 He means... 1547 01:13:38,001 --> 01:13:40,045 don't count your chickens before they hatch. 1548 01:13:40,295 --> 01:13:42,714 I... we haven't signed the contract yet. 1549 01:13:42,798 --> 01:13:43,924 But they offered, right? 1550 01:13:44,007 --> 01:13:45,759 Right! That's why we're celebrating! 1551 01:13:45,843 --> 01:13:46,844 Yaa! 1552 01:13:46,927 --> 01:13:47,928 [everyone laughs] 1553 01:13:48,011 --> 01:13:49,054 Ah so... 1554 01:13:49,137 --> 01:13:50,347 everybody... 1555 01:13:51,849 --> 01:13:52,850 [Enzo] Thank you. 1556 01:13:52,933 --> 01:13:54,101 Very welcome. 1557 01:13:54,726 --> 01:13:55,727 Now... 1558 01:13:56,478 --> 01:13:58,063 comes the big surprise. 1559 01:13:59,356 --> 01:14:01,316 Surprise, surprise, okay. 1560 01:14:02,276 --> 01:14:03,277 Ready? 1561 01:14:04,236 --> 01:14:05,237 Set... 1562 01:14:06,029 --> 01:14:07,030 whew! 1563 01:14:09,825 --> 01:14:10,826 -[Blanche] What's...? 1564 01:14:10,909 --> 01:14:13,453 [Victoria] This is, Max's great new art installation! 1565 01:14:14,162 --> 01:14:16,540 You should check out the one on the wall... here. 1566 01:14:16,707 --> 01:14:19,710 Max has re-invented himself as a serious artist. 1567 01:14:21,420 --> 01:14:23,213 [Blanche] Ah... ah... 1568 01:14:23,839 --> 01:14:25,090 Ah... Is that you? 1569 01:14:26,258 --> 01:14:27,634 Yeah. 1570 01:14:27,718 --> 01:14:29,219 Is he peeing? 1571 01:14:29,303 --> 01:14:35,184 I'm thinking of exhibiting in an art gallery, maybe a museum. 1572 01:14:35,267 --> 01:14:36,643 All you need is connections. 1573 01:14:37,477 --> 01:14:39,479 Yeah, Max has always been very daring. 1574 01:14:39,563 --> 01:14:41,732 That's what he was famous for at the long hill. 1575 01:14:41,815 --> 01:14:43,192 Daring? 1576 01:14:43,275 --> 01:14:44,443 That's rather deprav... 1577 01:14:44,526 --> 01:14:47,154 Enzo, whatever happened to your penny stocks? 1578 01:14:47,863 --> 01:14:50,866 Well uh... I invested in some more... 1579 01:14:50,949 --> 01:14:52,451 Yeah! I got a stock tip for you. 1580 01:14:52,868 --> 01:14:54,494 Picking up pennies off the street. 1581 01:14:54,578 --> 01:14:55,954 I mean, it's more lucrative. 1582 01:14:56,121 --> 01:14:59,458 My penny stock's already up by $3.68! 1583 01:14:59,541 --> 01:15:01,126 [chuckles] That's really up! 1584 01:15:01,210 --> 01:15:03,795 Check out Max's "Legumes a la Bauer"! 1585 01:15:04,338 --> 01:15:05,339 It's all raw! 1586 01:15:05,422 --> 01:15:07,132 [Enzo] Oh it's raw? 1587 01:15:07,549 --> 01:15:09,301 [all chuckling and exclaiming] 1588 01:15:10,427 --> 01:15:12,596 [Max] I mean, cooking makes food toxic, right? 1589 01:15:13,180 --> 01:15:15,432 Besides that I like to maintain high vibrations 1590 01:15:15,516 --> 01:15:17,142 [all muttering] 1591 01:15:17,601 --> 01:15:18,685 Let's go for it. 1592 01:15:18,769 --> 01:15:20,020 Thanks for having us over. 1593 01:15:20,103 --> 01:15:21,855 Yeah. I'll go to the hands. 1594 01:15:21,939 --> 01:15:23,482 Mmm... 1595 01:15:23,565 --> 01:15:25,025 It's real good! 1596 01:15:25,734 --> 01:15:26,777 And... 1597 01:15:26,860 --> 01:15:28,695 the sprinkles of... 1598 01:15:28,779 --> 01:15:29,947 what are those? 1599 01:15:30,030 --> 01:15:32,950 That's almonds and Brazil nuts. 1600 01:15:33,200 --> 01:15:34,451 [whispers] Thank god! 1601 01:15:35,702 --> 01:15:36,954 Wundernuts! 1602 01:15:37,037 --> 01:15:39,039 - [laughs] - Max chopped them by hand! 1603 01:15:39,122 --> 01:15:40,499 [Max] With my special knife! 1604 01:15:40,624 --> 01:15:41,834 [Blanche] Wow! Thank you! 1605 01:15:43,126 --> 01:15:44,294 Hmm! It's really very... 1606 01:15:45,128 --> 01:15:46,296 creative. 1607 01:15:46,922 --> 01:15:49,508 [Max] Creativity is the ski-jumping hill of my soul. 1608 01:15:50,300 --> 01:15:52,678 As an artist, I like to break stifling rules and... 1609 01:15:52,761 --> 01:15:56,473 to achieve gobsmacking jumps! 1610 01:15:56,557 --> 01:15:57,558 [Victoria laughs] 1611 01:15:57,933 --> 01:16:00,644 What do you want to do here, in terms of work? 1612 01:16:00,727 --> 01:16:03,063 Um... I'm thinking of... 1613 01:16:03,146 --> 01:16:05,566 You could make a ton as a ski instructor. 1614 01:16:07,317 --> 01:16:09,152 I'm not going to teach the snowplough, 1615 01:16:09,236 --> 01:16:10,612 to snot-nosed brats right! 1616 01:16:10,696 --> 01:16:12,489 You remember "Eddie the Eagle"? 1617 01:16:12,573 --> 01:16:13,574 Uh huh. 1618 01:16:13,657 --> 01:16:15,993 He still earns a living with live appearances. 1619 01:16:16,076 --> 01:16:17,870 I don't want anybody to know who I am. 1620 01:16:17,953 --> 01:16:18,954 Okay. Well... 1621 01:16:19,663 --> 01:16:22,249 I don't think you have a problem with that in New York 1622 01:16:22,374 --> 01:16:23,792 And besides, you know I mean... 1623 01:16:25,169 --> 01:16:26,336 I have nothing in common, 1624 01:16:26,420 --> 01:16:28,213 with the worst ski-jumper in history. 1625 01:16:28,297 --> 01:16:31,133 I mean, who still runs around supermarkets in a chicken suit! 1626 01:16:31,216 --> 01:16:32,342 He's the world champion. 1627 01:16:32,426 --> 01:16:33,427 Yeah, that's right! 1628 01:16:34,428 --> 01:16:35,429 Well uh... 1629 01:16:36,096 --> 01:16:37,806 What are you thinking of doing then? 1630 01:16:38,473 --> 01:16:39,808 [Max] Well, I see myself, 1631 01:16:39,892 --> 01:16:44,479 like selling my work, to art collectors... or museums. 1632 01:16:44,563 --> 01:16:45,898 Moma wouldn't be bad right? 1633 01:16:47,149 --> 01:16:48,775 Don't you have connections there? 1634 01:16:49,151 --> 01:16:50,277 I think he means Moba? 1635 01:16:51,153 --> 01:16:52,154 [Max] So what's Moba? 1636 01:16:52,905 --> 01:16:54,615 [Blanche] Uh... It's a museum of... 1637 01:16:54,698 --> 01:16:57,576 it's a gallery... of unusual art. 1638 01:16:58,285 --> 01:16:59,286 Like what? 1639 01:17:00,662 --> 01:17:01,663 Like there's a... 1640 01:17:01,747 --> 01:17:04,166 a painting that mocks the George Seurat painting, 1641 01:17:04,249 --> 01:17:06,627 that the musical "Sunday in the Park with George" 1642 01:17:06,710 --> 01:17:07,711 is based on. 1643 01:17:07,794 --> 01:17:09,296 - [Victoria] Oh! - Yeah, its, um... 1644 01:17:09,379 --> 01:17:12,299 this fat guy sitting on the toilet... 1645 01:17:12,382 --> 01:17:14,676 and it's called "Sunday on the pot with George". 1646 01:17:14,760 --> 01:17:17,262 Moba... "Museum of bad art" 1647 01:17:18,096 --> 01:17:19,097 [scoffs] 1648 01:17:19,181 --> 01:17:21,517 I mean, there's no need, to beat around the bush, 1649 01:17:21,600 --> 01:17:22,601 I can take it. 1650 01:17:22,684 --> 01:17:23,685 [Victoria] Blanche... 1651 01:17:23,769 --> 01:17:26,313 you just can't appreciate the unconventional. 1652 01:17:26,396 --> 01:17:27,397 Vicky... 1653 01:17:27,481 --> 01:17:29,900 you know. It's okay. 1654 01:17:29,983 --> 01:17:33,237 Because today's bad art is tomorrow's good art! 1655 01:17:33,320 --> 01:17:34,530 Can't wait for tomorrow! 1656 01:17:37,115 --> 01:17:39,034 [Max] You know, my art is avant-garde... 1657 01:17:39,117 --> 01:17:40,536 that's something small-minded, 1658 01:17:40,619 --> 01:17:42,621 bourgeois people wouldn't understand. 1659 01:17:45,999 --> 01:17:47,417 [sounds of eating] 1660 01:17:55,884 --> 01:17:59,721 So, Max and I are shooting a film. 1661 01:17:59,805 --> 01:18:01,390 Unlaid eggs! 1662 01:18:05,519 --> 01:18:07,855 Boy, it's like you guys were made for each other! 1663 01:18:08,939 --> 01:18:10,566 When did you know that uh... 1664 01:18:11,066 --> 01:18:13,819 Oh actually it's a weird story how we ended up... 1665 01:18:13,902 --> 01:18:15,320 I have a weird story for you. 1666 01:18:16,029 --> 01:18:17,030 [Max burps] 1667 01:18:17,281 --> 01:18:19,199 [Max] I was in Mexico, in an area called, 1668 01:18:19,283 --> 01:18:20,617 Cuetlaxcoapan, 1669 01:18:23,328 --> 01:18:25,539 which means "where serpents change their skin." 1670 01:18:29,418 --> 01:18:30,419 [burps] 1671 01:18:30,502 --> 01:18:31,503 And um... 1672 01:18:32,087 --> 01:18:34,006 my wife the bitch, without any warning, 1673 01:18:34,089 --> 01:18:35,090 just kicks me out. 1674 01:18:36,717 --> 01:18:37,718 And um... 1675 01:18:40,012 --> 01:18:41,430 I start walking on the street, 1676 01:18:41,513 --> 01:18:44,183 and I come to this tiny mountain village. 1677 01:18:44,266 --> 01:18:46,935 It's high noon, there's not a soul abroad... 1678 01:18:47,019 --> 01:18:49,688 and then I hear this pained "mooooo"... 1679 01:18:49,771 --> 01:18:51,607 Max, Max, please don't 1680 01:18:51,690 --> 01:18:52,900 Max, please don't! 1681 01:18:52,983 --> 01:18:53,984 It's so sad. 1682 01:18:54,067 --> 01:18:57,404 Oh it's so sad! Why don't you focus on my ass instead! 1683 01:18:58,530 --> 01:19:01,033 [Victoria] Max, I think you've had enough to drink... 1684 01:19:01,658 --> 01:19:04,411 [Max] I've got a riddle for you smart people. 1685 01:19:05,287 --> 01:19:06,455 A lion chases you, 1686 01:19:07,706 --> 01:19:11,418 [laughs] how fast do you have to run to not get eaten? 1687 01:19:15,964 --> 01:19:17,299 I thought you are so smart. 1688 01:19:20,135 --> 01:19:21,553 You have to be second slowest. 1689 01:19:21,637 --> 01:19:24,181 [laughs] 1690 01:19:24,723 --> 01:19:26,683 [choking] 1691 01:19:32,147 --> 01:19:33,899 Fuck that shit man! 1692 01:19:43,534 --> 01:19:44,535 Are you okay? 1693 01:19:44,618 --> 01:19:45,619 - Yeah. - Are you sure? 1694 01:19:45,702 --> 01:19:46,703 Are you okay? 1695 01:19:47,037 --> 01:19:48,038 Yeah, yeah, um... 1696 01:19:48,330 --> 01:19:49,456 he's just drunk. 1697 01:19:49,540 --> 01:19:50,999 [Enzo] Okay, okay. 1698 01:19:51,583 --> 01:19:53,669 Enzo showed me "Tango Shmango", I loved it! 1699 01:19:53,752 --> 01:19:55,420 - You did? - Yeah! 1700 01:19:55,504 --> 01:19:56,505 It's amazing. 1701 01:19:57,965 --> 01:19:59,258 Leave it, leave it! 1702 01:20:01,426 --> 01:20:03,554 If it wasn't for his great camera work, 1703 01:20:03,637 --> 01:20:06,139 we would not have gotten distribution. [sobs] 1704 01:20:07,891 --> 01:20:08,892 Oh by the way, 1705 01:20:08,976 --> 01:20:11,687 Blanche turned out to be a great camera operator herself. 1706 01:20:11,854 --> 01:20:12,855 [Victoria] Oh yeah? 1707 01:20:13,438 --> 01:20:15,065 Enzo's been teaching me. [laughing] 1708 01:20:15,148 --> 01:20:16,149 That's fantastic! 1709 01:20:18,110 --> 01:20:20,571 Do you need any help with the Vaduz Film contract? 1710 01:20:20,654 --> 01:20:21,655 Oh, I'm fine. 1711 01:20:21,738 --> 01:20:22,906 Max was going to help me. 1712 01:20:22,990 --> 01:20:23,991 May I present... 1713 01:20:24,074 --> 01:20:25,951 my ass, live! 1714 01:20:26,493 --> 01:20:28,579 - [Max] Yoohoo! - Why don't you put pants on! 1715 01:20:29,913 --> 01:20:32,249 [slurring] Somebody didn't do the laundry. 1716 01:20:33,917 --> 01:20:37,629 [Enzo] So ah, how'd you manage to wangle the distribution deal? 1717 01:20:37,963 --> 01:20:39,131 I want to show you this. 1718 01:20:39,214 --> 01:20:41,175 Last time I was in Liechtenstein, 1719 01:20:41,717 --> 01:20:42,718 I... uh... 1720 01:20:43,510 --> 01:20:46,221 was honored... as a filmmaker by the mayor. 1721 01:20:46,388 --> 01:20:48,140 He's a very Catholic mayor! [laughs] 1722 01:20:48,223 --> 01:20:49,224 Look! 1723 01:20:49,308 --> 01:20:50,309 Aw! 1724 01:20:50,726 --> 01:20:52,769 He gave me the key to the city of Vaduz. 1725 01:20:52,853 --> 01:20:55,439 My mom in the front row with tears in her eyes. 1726 01:20:55,522 --> 01:20:56,523 [Blanche] Great! 1727 01:20:56,607 --> 01:20:58,400 Without even having watched the film, 1728 01:20:58,483 --> 01:21:01,111 he put in a good word for "Tango Shmango" at Vaduz Film. 1729 01:21:01,195 --> 01:21:02,529 And then he did watch it... 1730 01:21:03,113 --> 01:21:04,114 [Victoria] He did? 1731 01:21:04,531 --> 01:21:06,241 [Blanche] That's so great. 1732 01:21:06,450 --> 01:21:07,534 The irony. You had to, 1733 01:21:07,618 --> 01:21:09,828 go to America to get recognition in Europe! 1734 01:21:10,662 --> 01:21:11,788 [chuckling] 1735 01:21:12,873 --> 01:21:13,874 Amazing. 1736 01:21:13,957 --> 01:21:16,168 The EMT's had to revive the Catholic mayor, 1737 01:21:16,251 --> 01:21:18,295 after he watched the infamous sex scene! 1738 01:21:18,962 --> 01:21:19,963 Huh? 1739 01:21:20,047 --> 01:21:21,965 Which in my opinion, was just pure porn. 1740 01:21:22,716 --> 01:21:24,051 What are you talking about? 1741 01:21:24,593 --> 01:21:29,389 Well, after Vaduz Film got word of the mayor's heart attack, 1742 01:21:29,473 --> 01:21:30,474 [chuckles] 1743 01:21:30,849 --> 01:21:32,142 they canceled the deal. 1744 01:21:33,101 --> 01:21:34,102 [burps] 1745 01:21:37,898 --> 01:21:38,899 [Max slurps] 1746 01:21:38,982 --> 01:21:40,609 I had a nice chat with them though, 1747 01:21:42,152 --> 01:21:43,153 they... 1748 01:21:43,237 --> 01:21:44,238 cast me in... 1749 01:21:45,531 --> 01:21:47,574 "Dancing time in Liechtenstein" 1750 01:21:47,658 --> 01:21:48,825 [laughing] 1751 01:21:49,952 --> 01:21:52,746 It's the Liechtenstein version of " Dancing with the Stars" 1752 01:21:54,873 --> 01:21:57,459 So now my ass on the door doesn't look so bad huh? 1753 01:22:01,296 --> 01:22:02,297 [burps] 1754 01:22:04,925 --> 01:22:06,093 [laughs] 1755 01:22:11,431 --> 01:22:13,433 You think you'll find another distributor? 1756 01:22:13,517 --> 01:22:14,601 Forget about the film, 1757 01:22:14,685 --> 01:22:16,395 the man insults her left and right. 1758 01:22:16,478 --> 01:22:17,604 He's drunk. 1759 01:22:17,688 --> 01:22:19,690 [Enzo] When he's sober he's any different. 1760 01:22:19,773 --> 01:22:21,483 It's, it's very hard for a big star, 1761 01:22:21,567 --> 01:22:22,943 to live in such a tiny space. 1762 01:22:25,362 --> 01:22:27,614 Your image on that dresser is just... 1763 01:22:27,698 --> 01:22:28,740 sick! 1764 01:22:28,824 --> 01:22:30,868 Yeah, it kind of creeps me out too. 1765 01:22:31,326 --> 01:22:33,954 [Enzo] He's got her doing this crap instead of our show! 1766 01:22:34,705 --> 01:22:39,293 I'm forty five years old. When am I going to have a family? 1767 01:22:40,919 --> 01:22:42,546 You could still have a family. 1768 01:22:47,301 --> 01:22:49,803 Sorry about this... stupid! 1769 01:22:57,227 --> 01:22:59,938 She's always has to prove, she can make everything work.? 1770 01:23:00,022 --> 01:23:02,065 Yeah, I used to call her the "und" girl. 1771 01:23:02,733 --> 01:23:04,026 [Blanche] What's that mean? 1772 01:23:04,109 --> 01:23:06,445 I can do this, und I can do that und I can... 1773 01:23:06,528 --> 01:23:08,113 [Blanche] That's not really funny. 1774 01:23:08,197 --> 01:23:09,198 No, it's not. 1775 01:23:09,698 --> 01:23:10,908 Anyway, let's just go. 1776 01:23:12,618 --> 01:23:13,827 Wait! 1777 01:23:14,494 --> 01:23:15,495 Is that? 1778 01:23:21,710 --> 01:23:23,420 [ominous music starts] 1779 01:23:31,011 --> 01:23:32,513 [ominous music builds] 1780 01:23:52,866 --> 01:23:55,369 [mother and baby cooing and giggling] 1781 01:23:55,577 --> 01:23:56,662 May I come over? 1782 01:23:59,498 --> 01:24:00,791 Knock, knock. 1783 01:24:01,250 --> 01:24:02,292 [Max] Okay. 1784 01:24:04,962 --> 01:24:07,464 [mother and baby singing and giggling] 1785 01:24:17,307 --> 01:24:20,477 Your babies... are beautiful! 1786 01:24:21,061 --> 01:24:22,145 [laptop closes] 1787 01:24:28,110 --> 01:24:30,529 Your babies are beautiful, so is your ex. 1788 01:24:42,666 --> 01:24:43,834 Let's get a bigger place, 1789 01:24:43,917 --> 01:24:45,669 so we can have our own family. 1790 01:24:48,297 --> 01:24:49,923 [Sighs] Who's going to pay for it? 1791 01:24:50,007 --> 01:24:51,216 [Man] And heeere he is... 1792 01:24:51,300 --> 01:24:52,968 Where there's a will... 1793 01:24:54,469 --> 01:24:55,512 there's a way! 1794 01:24:55,596 --> 01:24:57,306 Please, I'm not your sex object. 1795 01:24:57,973 --> 01:25:00,559 [Bauer! Bauer!] 1796 01:25:01,643 --> 01:25:04,980 [Victoria] You... You posted that... your Olympic jump? 1797 01:25:05,063 --> 01:25:07,065 You've been clicking this all day. 1798 01:25:09,234 --> 01:25:10,611 Internet presence, is money. 1799 01:25:13,322 --> 01:25:15,741 [Victoria] Did you spend any time editing our film? 1800 01:25:16,074 --> 01:25:17,826 What are you doing to make money huh? 1801 01:25:18,619 --> 01:25:20,954 I don't make enough for two people, you know that. 1802 01:25:21,038 --> 01:25:22,664 You've got a work permit now. 1803 01:25:22,748 --> 01:25:24,833 It's a temporary permit. 1804 01:25:24,917 --> 01:25:26,919 Then just get a temporary job! 1805 01:25:27,002 --> 01:25:29,463 What do you want me to get, some idiotic job, 1806 01:25:29,546 --> 01:25:31,340 like a fucking janitor huh? 1807 01:25:38,889 --> 01:25:39,890 [Victoria] Of course, 1808 01:25:39,973 --> 01:25:42,142 I don't want you to get a job you don't like. 1809 01:26:03,247 --> 01:26:06,083 When I landed my first jump, I was eight years old. 1810 01:26:07,501 --> 01:26:08,836 [Max] Off the 68 foot ramp. 1811 01:26:09,920 --> 01:26:12,506 I heard my Dad say, "my son..." 1812 01:26:13,048 --> 01:26:16,218 he said... "my son took off like a rocket" 1813 01:26:19,513 --> 01:26:20,889 He knew how special you are. 1814 01:26:20,973 --> 01:26:21,974 [Max scoffs] 1815 01:26:28,355 --> 01:26:31,024 When you jump far, you have to like lean forward a lot, 1816 01:26:32,109 --> 01:26:34,278 for the least amount of wind resistance, 1817 01:26:36,363 --> 01:26:38,490 but the current still has to carry you. 1818 01:26:40,534 --> 01:26:41,535 And... 1819 01:26:43,370 --> 01:26:47,124 the smallest jerk will interrupt flow of air, 1820 01:26:47,624 --> 01:26:50,252 and make you drop out of the sky like a rock. 1821 01:26:51,461 --> 01:26:52,462 Ah! 1822 01:26:54,423 --> 01:26:55,424 I mean... 1823 01:26:56,925 --> 01:26:58,886 to fly over 50,000 spectators... 1824 01:27:01,263 --> 01:27:05,601 dive into a sea of white and blue flags... 1825 01:27:16,278 --> 01:27:17,279 [clacks] 1826 01:27:18,280 --> 01:27:19,865 Just want to jump one more time. 1827 01:27:19,948 --> 01:27:22,326 Just want to jump one more time. 1828 01:27:22,743 --> 01:27:23,744 [Victoria] Okay then, 1829 01:27:23,827 --> 01:27:25,704 you can do it again. 1830 01:27:26,580 --> 01:27:27,581 Just jump. Jump again. 1831 01:27:27,664 --> 01:27:28,665 I'm 50 years old 1832 01:27:29,458 --> 01:27:31,502 I know what you're going through. 1833 01:27:32,169 --> 01:27:34,087 What do you know what I'm going through? 1834 01:27:34,171 --> 01:27:36,423 You've never been a world champion of anything. 1835 01:27:36,507 --> 01:27:37,925 No. I know you're the hero. 1836 01:27:46,266 --> 01:27:47,643 [Victoria] You're their hero! 1837 01:27:49,394 --> 01:27:50,395 [gasps] 1838 01:27:51,146 --> 01:27:52,606 I will never have kids again. 1839 01:27:56,109 --> 01:27:57,236 [Victoria soft sobbing] 1840 01:28:05,702 --> 01:28:06,703 Where's Pedia? 1841 01:28:08,830 --> 01:28:10,290 [Victoria] He was right there! 1842 01:28:11,416 --> 01:28:12,417 Who? 1843 01:28:12,501 --> 01:28:13,877 When Dad went on his benders, 1844 01:28:13,961 --> 01:28:15,963 Pedia and I would look at the night sky. 1845 01:28:16,755 --> 01:28:18,382 And tell each other fairy tales 1846 01:28:18,465 --> 01:28:19,466 [laughs] 1847 01:28:20,050 --> 01:28:22,427 You mean that ugly head with the patch of clothing? 1848 01:28:23,178 --> 01:28:24,721 He made up for his weird looks. 1849 01:28:24,805 --> 01:28:28,100 With the best heart... and kindness! 1850 01:28:30,686 --> 01:28:32,187 I think I threw it out cleaning. 1851 01:28:34,398 --> 01:28:35,399 No! 1852 01:28:35,482 --> 01:28:37,609 No! No! No! No! 1853 01:28:38,151 --> 01:28:39,236 [cries] No! 1854 01:28:40,404 --> 01:28:41,405 [door slams] 1855 01:28:42,239 --> 01:28:43,866 [suspenseful music] 1856 01:28:59,423 --> 01:29:00,507 [laughs] 1857 01:29:12,728 --> 01:29:14,605 You are so stupid! 1858 01:29:20,527 --> 01:29:21,570 [laughs] 1859 01:29:32,122 --> 01:29:34,750 You could have spared yourself going through the garbage 1860 01:29:34,833 --> 01:29:36,835 like a homeless person looking for lint... 1861 01:29:41,632 --> 01:29:43,217 Look... 1862 01:29:43,300 --> 01:29:44,801 I got you on camera. 1863 01:29:46,011 --> 01:29:47,179 How about that. 1864 01:29:47,513 --> 01:29:48,555 Huh? 1865 01:29:49,806 --> 01:29:51,266 [Max] Ooh! 1866 01:29:51,725 --> 01:29:53,310 What are you going to do, huh? 1867 01:29:53,393 --> 01:29:55,062 [Victoria screams] Fucking asshole! 1868 01:29:55,145 --> 01:29:57,356 You're going to be upset? Oh poor baby! 1869 01:29:57,439 --> 01:29:58,440 Fuck you! 1870 01:29:58,524 --> 01:29:59,942 [Max] Oh yeah! Okay! Okay. 1871 01:30:00,484 --> 01:30:03,487 If you hadn't run off like a fucking loser 1872 01:30:03,570 --> 01:30:04,655 Shut the fuck up!! 1873 01:30:04,738 --> 01:30:08,325 I could have told you, I threw it out months ago! 1874 01:30:08,408 --> 01:30:09,409 [laughing] 1875 01:30:11,036 --> 01:30:13,121 That's what you get, that's what you get! 1876 01:30:13,205 --> 01:30:14,456 Payback time! 1877 01:30:15,249 --> 01:30:16,333 [Victoria] Get out! 1878 01:30:16,416 --> 01:30:17,793 You are such a drama queen! 1879 01:30:19,378 --> 01:30:22,506 I want you to pack your bags, and leave! 1880 01:30:24,258 --> 01:30:25,259 [door slams] 1881 01:30:38,772 --> 01:30:40,440 Ya, could I talk to Ms. Timm please. 1882 01:30:42,067 --> 01:30:43,068 She's where? 1883 01:30:43,527 --> 01:30:44,528 A silent retreat? 1884 01:30:45,821 --> 01:30:46,905 No message, thank you. 1885 01:30:53,787 --> 01:30:55,622 [typing] 1886 01:31:03,255 --> 01:31:04,548 [Max] No! 1887 01:31:04,631 --> 01:31:06,842 How can this happen to me! 1888 01:31:09,803 --> 01:31:11,263 Goddammit! 1889 01:31:13,682 --> 01:31:15,809 Why are you still here? 1890 01:31:15,893 --> 01:31:17,728 I erased our entire movie by mistake! 1891 01:31:17,811 --> 01:31:19,396 I don't care! Get out! 1892 01:31:19,897 --> 01:31:22,399 [Max] Why didn't I back it up in iCloud? [slams fist] 1893 01:31:22,566 --> 01:31:24,735 [bangs head] I'm a fucking idiot! 1894 01:31:25,611 --> 01:31:26,820 [metal snaps] Ow! Ow! Aah! 1895 01:31:26,904 --> 01:31:28,864 [Victoria shouts] And I'm the drama queen! 1896 01:31:28,947 --> 01:31:30,365 [screams] Help! 1897 01:31:30,449 --> 01:31:31,950 Oh, my foot, my toe! 1898 01:31:32,868 --> 01:31:36,538 [Max groaning in pain] 1899 01:31:36,622 --> 01:31:37,623 [metal snaps] 1900 01:31:37,706 --> 01:31:39,333 [Max] Oh, it hurts! It hurts! 1901 01:31:39,416 --> 01:31:40,417 [Victoria] God! 1902 01:31:40,501 --> 01:31:42,252 [Max] Can you get me some ice please. 1903 01:31:44,505 --> 01:31:46,798 [Max crying] 1904 01:31:47,341 --> 01:31:48,759 [Victoria] We can re-type it. 1905 01:31:53,222 --> 01:31:55,599 [Victoria] Come here, come up. It's okay. 1906 01:31:59,478 --> 01:32:01,188 [Max cries] It hurts. 1907 01:32:01,271 --> 01:32:03,023 What are you doing to yourself? 1908 01:32:05,108 --> 01:32:08,403 [Max crying] 1909 01:32:12,574 --> 01:32:15,077 I can't believe it, I wrecked our work 1910 01:32:15,869 --> 01:32:19,623 [still crying] 1911 01:32:20,582 --> 01:32:22,417 I'm so sorry, Vicky. 1912 01:32:23,335 --> 01:32:24,670 [eerie music] 1913 01:32:27,881 --> 01:32:29,049 I'm such an asshole. 1914 01:32:42,437 --> 01:32:43,605 Do you still love me? 1915 01:32:47,985 --> 01:32:48,986 [gasps] 1916 01:32:50,195 --> 01:32:51,238 What's going on? 1917 01:32:56,368 --> 01:32:57,369 Vicky! 1918 01:33:02,791 --> 01:33:04,501 [thumping] 1919 01:33:06,795 --> 01:33:09,047 [coroner] Go back inside the apartment please. 1920 01:33:09,131 --> 01:33:10,382 What's going on? 1921 01:33:10,465 --> 01:33:12,885 I'm picking up a Mr Lando Cox. 1922 01:33:13,051 --> 01:33:14,469 In a bag? 1923 01:33:15,262 --> 01:33:18,432 No, in a piano. Yeah in a bag. 1924 01:33:19,391 --> 01:33:21,018 Let me ask you something blondie. 1925 01:33:21,935 --> 01:33:23,645 [sniff] This guy's been dead a month, 1926 01:33:23,812 --> 01:33:26,106 what... nobody noticed? 1927 01:33:26,773 --> 01:33:28,025 He's so young! 1928 01:33:28,734 --> 01:33:29,776 [coroner] Not anymore. 1929 01:33:31,987 --> 01:33:33,155 Enjoy your life, lady. 1930 01:33:33,822 --> 01:33:35,240 [bag crackling] 1931 01:33:58,388 --> 01:34:01,433 I dreamed a demon was chasing me... 1932 01:34:04,102 --> 01:34:06,980 So I fled to a church with a beautiful mural, 1933 01:34:07,064 --> 01:34:08,732 of an angel on the ceiling. 1934 01:34:11,485 --> 01:34:12,778 Suddenly I could fly. 1935 01:34:14,863 --> 01:34:17,282 I touched the cool surface of the mural... 1936 01:34:18,534 --> 01:34:19,952 and kissed the angel. 1937 01:34:21,787 --> 01:34:23,080 He had your face. 1938 01:34:25,290 --> 01:34:28,043 In this light your face looks old and wrinkly. 1939 01:34:29,545 --> 01:34:30,546 - What? - [Max] Yeah... 1940 01:34:30,629 --> 01:34:33,423 I'm just thinking of all the things I don't like about you. 1941 01:34:33,715 --> 01:34:36,635 The way you wrinkle your nose, when you're brush your teeth. 1942 01:34:37,511 --> 01:34:40,055 You calling out emotional states all the time, like... 1943 01:34:40,138 --> 01:34:41,932 "happy, fat, angry"! 1944 01:34:42,015 --> 01:34:43,141 And your stupid friends. 1945 01:34:45,185 --> 01:34:48,021 By the way, did you know that Blanche has eyes like Hitler? 1946 01:34:48,689 --> 01:34:52,526 The white is visible at the bottom of her eyes. 1947 01:34:52,943 --> 01:34:54,653 But otherwise, you're okay? 1948 01:34:56,947 --> 01:34:59,116 And stop telling me your stupid dreams, okay. 1949 01:34:59,950 --> 01:35:00,993 Cause people like you, 1950 01:35:01,076 --> 01:35:03,871 need to be locked into mental institutions. 1951 01:35:04,788 --> 01:35:05,789 You know, 1952 01:35:05,873 --> 01:35:08,292 I made up the part about the angel having your face. 1953 01:35:08,709 --> 01:35:09,793 You're the demon! 1954 01:35:10,127 --> 01:35:11,128 Oh, I'm the demon? 1955 01:35:11,211 --> 01:35:13,172 I'm the demon? Really? 1956 01:35:13,255 --> 01:35:14,882 I will show you the demon! 1957 01:35:14,965 --> 01:35:16,633 I will show you what a demon I am! 1958 01:35:16,717 --> 01:35:18,385 I can show you... [paper ripping] 1959 01:35:18,468 --> 01:35:21,889 what a fucking demon and devil I am! 1960 01:35:21,972 --> 01:35:22,973 Do you like that? 1961 01:35:23,056 --> 01:35:24,183 Or do you like this...? 1962 01:35:24,266 --> 01:35:26,185 or do you like that, huh? 1963 01:35:26,560 --> 01:35:27,561 Good. 1964 01:35:27,644 --> 01:35:29,605 The script sucked anyway. 1965 01:35:29,897 --> 01:35:30,898 Now leave me alone. 1966 01:35:32,357 --> 01:35:35,360 [Max] You think you can reject your husband huh? 1967 01:35:35,444 --> 01:35:37,362 - [Victoria screams] - This what Mallards 1968 01:35:37,446 --> 01:35:39,489 do to their mates [sniggers] 1969 01:35:39,573 --> 01:35:40,782 I need to pee! 1970 01:35:40,866 --> 01:35:42,034 You're a liar! 1971 01:35:42,117 --> 01:35:45,412 My ex-wife never had to pee in 10 years. 1972 01:35:45,746 --> 01:35:47,748 I teach you something about marriage. 1973 01:35:48,040 --> 01:35:50,417 Okay, you have to be honest to your spouse. 1974 01:35:51,001 --> 01:35:52,753 Yeah! 1975 01:35:53,879 --> 01:35:54,880 Oh yeah? 1976 01:35:54,963 --> 01:35:57,674 Then what about you and Rhoda? 1977 01:35:58,091 --> 01:35:59,092 What, who? 1978 01:36:00,177 --> 01:36:01,470 You know exactly who. 1979 01:36:01,553 --> 01:36:03,764 You take pictures of each other's asses, 1980 01:36:03,847 --> 01:36:06,391 and that's not all, I'm sure! 1981 01:36:06,892 --> 01:36:09,770 [Max] That was ass sex! That was ass art! 1982 01:36:11,104 --> 01:36:12,147 [screams] Ow! 1983 01:36:12,648 --> 01:36:14,191 I'll call the police! 1984 01:36:16,944 --> 01:36:18,111 [cell phone record pings] 1985 01:36:18,195 --> 01:36:19,905 [Max] I told you not to touch me... 1986 01:36:19,988 --> 01:36:21,615 stay away from me! 1987 01:36:22,157 --> 01:36:26,203 Stop abusing me! Ow! Ouch! You're hurting me! 1988 01:36:26,286 --> 01:36:27,663 Stop abusing me! 1989 01:36:27,746 --> 01:36:29,122 [cell phone record pings off] 1990 01:36:29,206 --> 01:36:30,374 [sniffs] 1991 01:36:34,419 --> 01:36:35,587 By the way, you're nuts, 1992 01:36:35,671 --> 01:36:37,714 If you think I'd want to have kids with you 1993 01:36:40,217 --> 01:36:41,260 I mean... 1994 01:36:41,343 --> 01:36:43,887 my daughters are young, beautiful and smart. 1995 01:36:44,888 --> 01:36:47,558 Why would I want to merge your shit DNA with theirs huh? 1996 01:36:50,102 --> 01:36:51,144 I am beautiful! 1997 01:36:51,228 --> 01:36:52,855 [laughs] 1998 01:36:52,938 --> 01:36:54,898 Your eyes are, too close together. 1999 01:36:54,982 --> 01:36:56,441 Here I can prove it. 2000 01:36:58,235 --> 01:37:00,070 Cut that shit out! 2001 01:37:00,779 --> 01:37:03,365 You're an ugly old narcissist. 2002 01:37:03,949 --> 01:37:06,702 Who the hell would want to have kids with someone like you? 2003 01:37:06,785 --> 01:37:08,120 What did I ever do to you? 2004 01:37:08,203 --> 01:37:09,329 You let me down... 2005 01:37:09,413 --> 01:37:10,789 economically. 2006 01:37:11,790 --> 01:37:13,166 What the fuck? 2007 01:37:13,250 --> 01:37:15,586 I pay all your bills, your rent, 2008 01:37:15,669 --> 01:37:17,462 phone, food, your immigration lawyer! 2009 01:37:17,546 --> 01:37:19,256 Get the fuck out now! 2010 01:37:21,592 --> 01:37:23,010 [laughs] Now you listen to me. 2011 01:37:23,093 --> 01:37:24,261 And listen carefully. 2012 01:37:24,344 --> 01:37:26,346 I'll stay here in this fucking apartment, 2013 01:37:26,430 --> 01:37:28,307 till I get my permanent green card. 2014 01:37:29,349 --> 01:37:31,310 Then I will divorce you! 2015 01:37:39,735 --> 01:37:41,486 You bought Tuscan bread again? 2016 01:37:41,570 --> 01:37:43,614 I mean look! Ezekiel... 2017 01:37:43,697 --> 01:37:46,200 why don't you remember, Ezekiel bread? 2018 01:37:47,034 --> 01:37:48,035 I forgot. 2019 01:37:48,118 --> 01:37:50,287 You forgot because you don't focus! 2020 01:37:50,829 --> 01:37:52,831 You do this, and that and the other thing, 2021 01:37:52,915 --> 01:37:55,083 and you forget important stuff like bread! 2022 01:37:55,292 --> 01:37:57,961 You're right, I should focus more. 2023 01:37:58,670 --> 01:38:00,214 - That's right, [Victoria screams] 2024 01:38:00,297 --> 01:38:01,381 you should focus more. 2025 01:38:01,465 --> 01:38:02,466 Call me God. 2026 01:38:02,549 --> 01:38:04,718 I won't call you God, but I will call you Gut. 2027 01:38:07,971 --> 01:38:09,598 [laughs] 2028 01:38:09,681 --> 01:38:11,266 [Max] You think that's funny huh? 2029 01:38:11,350 --> 01:38:12,434 You think that's funny? 2030 01:38:12,518 --> 01:38:14,561 You think that's funny huh? Huh? Huh? 2031 01:38:15,145 --> 01:38:16,146 [punches] 2032 01:38:17,856 --> 01:38:18,982 [skype ringing] 2033 01:38:22,736 --> 01:38:24,029 [skype still ringing] 2034 01:38:31,245 --> 01:38:32,579 [Enzo] Hey! What's going on? 2035 01:38:32,663 --> 01:38:33,789 We texted you 20 times, 2036 01:38:33,872 --> 01:38:36,333 you don't answer our calls, or messages on Facebook? 2037 01:38:36,416 --> 01:38:37,793 I've been busy. 2038 01:38:37,876 --> 01:38:39,378 Why are you wearing sunglasses? 2039 01:38:39,461 --> 01:38:41,713 I have such a headache. 2040 01:38:41,797 --> 01:38:43,715 Wait, did he put his hands on you? 2041 01:38:45,300 --> 01:38:47,177 I don't want to talk about it. 2042 01:38:47,719 --> 01:38:49,763 When are you going to kick that fucker out? 2043 01:38:49,847 --> 01:38:50,848 I love him. 2044 01:38:50,931 --> 01:38:52,766 And I love a knife in my ass! 2045 01:38:52,850 --> 01:38:54,560 Listen, go to the police. 2046 01:38:55,227 --> 01:38:56,228 I gotta go. 2047 01:38:59,857 --> 01:39:00,858 [both sigh] 2048 01:39:20,252 --> 01:39:21,503 [sighs] 2049 01:39:33,056 --> 01:39:34,057 [whimpers] 2050 01:39:36,852 --> 01:39:37,853 [cries out] 2051 01:39:41,690 --> 01:39:42,816 [shouts] Ow! 2052 01:40:03,921 --> 01:40:04,963 [cries out] 2053 01:40:08,300 --> 01:40:11,637 [sobbing in pain] 2054 01:40:24,858 --> 01:40:25,984 [panting] 2055 01:40:43,126 --> 01:40:44,169 [groaning] 2056 01:40:50,259 --> 01:40:51,844 [water flows] 2057 01:41:09,486 --> 01:41:12,197 [groaning] 2058 01:41:40,642 --> 01:41:42,352 [groans] 2059 01:41:48,692 --> 01:41:50,736 [piano music] 2060 01:42:55,634 --> 01:42:56,718 [door locks] 2061 01:43:19,741 --> 01:43:23,495 - [woman moaning] - [man moaning] 2062 01:43:24,121 --> 01:43:25,122 [knocking] 2063 01:43:26,039 --> 01:43:27,082 Shit! 2064 01:43:28,250 --> 01:43:29,251 [knocking] 2065 01:43:29,418 --> 01:43:30,878 [moaning continues] 2066 01:43:33,589 --> 01:43:34,590 [knocking] 2067 01:43:38,385 --> 01:43:39,386 [knocking] 2068 01:43:41,638 --> 01:43:42,848 Who is it? 2069 01:43:43,348 --> 01:43:44,766 [woman] Your mother-in-law! 2070 01:43:54,484 --> 01:43:55,652 Where is my daughter? 2071 01:43:55,736 --> 01:43:57,321 [Max] And a good day to you 2072 01:44:01,033 --> 01:44:02,326 She'll be back in a minute. 2073 01:44:08,957 --> 01:44:09,958 Are you sick? 2074 01:44:10,042 --> 01:44:11,043 [Max] No. 2075 01:44:12,711 --> 01:44:14,755 Why... are you in bed at this hour? 2076 01:44:20,719 --> 01:44:21,720 Huh? 2077 01:44:21,803 --> 01:44:23,138 [Max] None of your business. 2078 01:44:27,226 --> 01:44:28,602 I guess someone has to... 2079 01:44:34,274 --> 01:44:35,275 someone... 2080 01:44:36,109 --> 01:44:37,819 has to be the man around here. 2081 01:44:46,703 --> 01:44:47,704 Uh! 2082 01:44:50,082 --> 01:44:51,083 Ah! 2083 01:44:51,375 --> 01:44:53,585 She's always punctual, my daughter, isn't she? 2084 01:45:00,592 --> 01:45:01,593 Huh? 2085 01:45:03,095 --> 01:45:05,013 And she's not only beautiful, 2086 01:45:05,848 --> 01:45:07,015 but talented... 2087 01:45:08,976 --> 01:45:10,727 Yeah, I'm a lucky guy. 2088 01:45:12,604 --> 01:45:13,647 The trouble is, 2089 01:45:14,690 --> 01:45:16,441 her heart's too good... 2090 01:45:16,692 --> 01:45:18,151 For what huh? 2091 01:45:18,986 --> 01:45:20,153 [keys rattling] 2092 01:45:20,487 --> 01:45:21,864 Ah! 2093 01:45:22,781 --> 01:45:25,576 [Max] Your mother barged in here and started threatening me. 2094 01:45:26,493 --> 01:45:27,494 Mutti! 2095 01:45:28,370 --> 01:45:31,123 [mother] My child! 2096 01:45:31,290 --> 01:45:33,417 You're teaching dance like this? 2097 01:45:34,042 --> 01:45:35,544 What are you doing here? 2098 01:45:38,589 --> 01:45:39,590 Whah. 2099 01:45:42,176 --> 01:45:43,177 Hah. 2100 01:45:49,850 --> 01:45:51,018 [whispering] Enzo called 2101 01:45:51,894 --> 01:45:53,854 He told me what you're been going through. 2102 01:45:54,938 --> 01:45:56,607 Why does everyone butt in? 2103 01:45:57,149 --> 01:45:58,233 [Victoria] Shit! 2104 01:46:01,069 --> 01:46:02,070 Sorry, 2105 01:46:02,446 --> 01:46:03,447 Do you want some tea? 2106 01:46:03,530 --> 01:46:04,740 [mother] Yes, thank you. 2107 01:46:06,533 --> 01:46:07,534 [Victoria] Chamomile? 2108 01:46:07,618 --> 01:46:08,619 [mother] Yes. 2109 01:46:16,251 --> 01:46:17,503 [Max] Excuse me. 2110 01:46:23,634 --> 01:46:25,928 [mother] Why do you let him treat you like this? 2111 01:46:26,386 --> 01:46:27,471 I'm not so innocent, 2112 01:46:28,055 --> 01:46:29,056 I nag him. 2113 01:46:30,933 --> 01:46:32,643 Where is your self-respect? 2114 01:46:34,645 --> 01:46:35,812 Yeah. 2115 01:46:36,438 --> 01:46:37,981 [Victoria] Who did I learn from? 2116 01:46:39,399 --> 01:46:40,943 I didn't go through everything, 2117 01:46:41,026 --> 01:46:45,906 so... so... you could support this piece of crap 2118 01:46:47,115 --> 01:46:48,116 I love him! 2119 01:46:53,288 --> 01:46:54,331 Pack your things, 2120 01:46:55,332 --> 01:46:56,667 you're coming with me! 2121 01:46:58,710 --> 01:46:59,878 My home is here! 2122 01:47:03,966 --> 01:47:04,967 [mother] Hmph! 2123 01:47:05,592 --> 01:47:07,177 He'll never look that good again, 2124 01:47:07,261 --> 01:47:09,054 your Prince Harming! 2125 01:47:09,763 --> 01:47:11,598 Well at least he's famous. 2126 01:47:12,516 --> 01:47:13,517 [chuckles] 2127 01:47:14,017 --> 01:47:16,019 [shouting] Your father was a star fucker! 2128 01:47:16,645 --> 01:47:18,355 I'm "not" a star fucker. 2129 01:47:19,690 --> 01:47:21,692 Max and I have a real relationship. 2130 01:47:24,403 --> 01:47:25,404 [bangs] 2131 01:47:26,947 --> 01:47:27,948 Go ahead, 2132 01:47:28,031 --> 01:47:29,116 give up your friends, 2133 01:47:29,199 --> 01:47:30,325 say goodbye to me! 2134 01:47:30,409 --> 01:47:31,827 This is my life! 2135 01:47:33,370 --> 01:47:36,999 You are a slave, to what you're afraid to loose. 2136 01:47:40,252 --> 01:47:43,046 Why are you afraid to lose this... this... 2137 01:47:59,980 --> 01:48:01,690 Mutti! 2138 01:48:07,529 --> 01:48:09,156 [happy music] 2139 01:48:15,495 --> 01:48:16,496 Hi everyone, 2140 01:48:16,580 --> 01:48:20,000 this is the follow up to my 'pretzel talk' with Max Bauer. 2141 01:48:20,459 --> 01:48:22,461 [keys jangling] 2142 01:48:22,544 --> 01:48:23,837 [knocking] 2143 01:48:25,756 --> 01:48:27,758 [Max] Open the fucking door! 2144 01:48:29,051 --> 01:48:30,636 Show time! 2145 01:48:45,442 --> 01:48:46,527 You changed the locks? 2146 01:48:48,237 --> 01:48:50,030 This is... divorce papers. 2147 01:48:50,113 --> 01:48:52,366 You'll sign them, and then you'll leave. 2148 01:48:52,449 --> 01:48:54,618 I warned you, don't fuck with me! 2149 01:48:54,701 --> 01:48:57,204 All I want you to do, is sign them. 2150 01:48:58,413 --> 01:49:00,290 This better be a joke! 2151 01:49:00,749 --> 01:49:02,000 Where's my stuff? 2152 01:49:03,710 --> 01:49:05,462 Here. Including your medal! 2153 01:49:06,797 --> 01:49:08,799 I'll have you arrested for locking me out! 2154 01:49:09,424 --> 01:49:10,425 Oh yeah? 2155 01:49:10,509 --> 01:49:12,135 Are you going to sign this or not? 2156 01:49:16,390 --> 01:49:18,308 [paper ripping] 2157 01:49:23,105 --> 01:49:25,357 [Man] I'll have you arrested for locking me out! 2158 01:49:25,440 --> 01:49:27,401 Well then, you're going to jail with me! 2159 01:49:27,693 --> 01:49:30,445 But I'll sue you for spousal abuse, abandonment and rape! 2160 01:49:35,701 --> 01:49:36,952 Where are my knives? 2161 01:49:37,035 --> 01:49:39,705 You think your daughters are going to visit you in jail? 2162 01:49:40,956 --> 01:49:44,960 Do you think the public wants to hear the story I can tell? 2163 01:49:51,091 --> 01:49:52,551 My knives are not here! 2164 01:49:52,634 --> 01:49:55,512 You really think I'd be stupid enough to let you have knives? 2165 01:49:58,932 --> 01:50:01,810 I... am going to kill you! 2166 01:50:09,026 --> 01:50:11,111 I always thought you were somebody. 2167 01:50:12,613 --> 01:50:16,867 Go ahead... prove that you're a nobody. 2168 01:50:19,328 --> 01:50:21,330 - [punches] - [screams] 2169 01:50:21,413 --> 01:50:22,623 [slaps] 2170 01:50:22,706 --> 01:50:23,832 [screaming] 2171 01:50:23,916 --> 01:50:26,168 [cries] Haven't you done enough? 2172 01:50:27,336 --> 01:50:30,088 You could have had it all... you stupid bitch! 2173 01:50:30,172 --> 01:50:31,298 [sobbing] 2174 01:50:31,381 --> 01:50:33,050 [knocking] Police! Open the door! 2175 01:50:34,968 --> 01:50:36,386 Police, let me see your hands! 2176 01:50:36,470 --> 01:50:37,471 [Man] Don't hurt me! 2177 01:50:37,554 --> 01:50:39,473 Let me see your hands! Put your hands up! 2178 01:50:39,556 --> 01:50:40,557 It's okay! 2179 01:50:40,641 --> 01:50:41,892 [Police] Turn around. 2180 01:50:41,975 --> 01:50:44,019 Don't hurt me! It's not what it looks like! 2181 01:50:44,102 --> 01:50:47,022 [Police] Turn around! Put your hands in the small of your back 2182 01:50:48,106 --> 01:50:50,692 Aah! Ouch! I didn't do anything. 2183 01:50:50,776 --> 01:50:52,402 [Police] Get this guy to bookings. 2184 01:50:52,486 --> 01:50:53,612 [man] I need my lawyer, 2185 01:50:53,820 --> 01:50:54,863 I'm a famous Olympian. 2186 01:50:55,656 --> 01:50:57,282 We were rehearsing a reality show! 2187 01:50:57,366 --> 01:50:58,367 Tell them Vicky! 2188 01:50:58,492 --> 01:51:00,410 And my grandmother is Santa Claus! 2189 01:51:00,536 --> 01:51:01,828 [Police] Get him outta here! 2190 01:51:03,747 --> 01:51:04,873 Are you okay ma'am? 2191 01:51:06,250 --> 01:51:08,418 You're lucky your mother saw you live streaming 2192 01:51:10,170 --> 01:51:11,171 [director] And cut! 2193 01:51:12,673 --> 01:51:13,924 Good, good job! 2194 01:51:17,427 --> 01:51:18,554 It's good for camera. 2195 01:51:19,888 --> 01:51:21,223 Yeah, that was good. 2196 01:51:21,306 --> 01:51:22,599 Mr Bauer. 2197 01:51:22,683 --> 01:51:24,434 Oh you can call me Max 2198 01:51:25,811 --> 01:51:26,812 Max. 2199 01:51:27,604 --> 01:51:29,815 Not only did you win the World Cup, 2200 01:51:29,898 --> 01:51:32,693 you set a world record in ski-jumping, 2201 01:51:32,776 --> 01:51:35,487 for 954 feet in Albertville, 2202 01:51:35,571 --> 01:51:38,949 while landing on only one ski, after the other came off! 2203 01:51:39,032 --> 01:51:40,367 Somebody did their homework! 2204 01:51:40,450 --> 01:51:42,035 [chuckles] I do what I can! 2205 01:51:43,245 --> 01:51:44,538 So, what does it feel like, 2206 01:51:44,621 --> 01:51:48,166 to fly at the speed of 75 mph, 2207 01:51:48,250 --> 01:51:50,460 over an area as large as a football field? 2208 01:51:50,544 --> 01:51:52,588 Like in slow motion, if all goes well. 2209 01:51:54,423 --> 01:51:55,883 How do you overcome your fear? 2210 01:51:56,717 --> 01:51:59,052 Well, if you're afraid, you shouldn't jump... 2211 01:51:59,136 --> 01:52:03,599 I imagine the space below me not as empty, 2212 01:52:03,682 --> 01:52:08,896 but filled with energy, voices, spirits. 2213 01:52:13,942 --> 01:52:15,527 Fascinating... 2214 01:52:17,029 --> 01:52:18,113 and everywhere you go, 2215 01:52:19,198 --> 01:52:22,743 your fans want to see the famous "Tele Max"! 2216 01:52:22,826 --> 01:52:23,869 Oh that! 2217 01:52:24,036 --> 01:52:25,537 [both chuckle] 2218 01:52:25,621 --> 01:52:28,081 That trademark finish you execute 2219 01:52:28,165 --> 01:52:30,542 with the elegance of a dancer 2220 01:52:30,626 --> 01:52:32,669 after your legendary landing! 2221 01:52:32,753 --> 01:52:34,796 You're the dancer. I just move around! 2222 01:52:43,175 --> 01:52:48,175 Subtitles by explosiveskull www.OpenSubtitles.org 145885