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1
00:01:09,319 --> 00:01:12,155
Sit down and think...
2
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...about what...
3
00:01:13,991 --> 00:01:15,450
...you...
4
00:01:16,535 --> 00:01:17,994
...did...
5
00:01:20,998 --> 00:01:22,665
...wrong.
6
00:01:25,127 --> 00:01:27,503
We're always given a choice,
ladies and gentlemen...
7
00:01:27,671 --> 00:01:30,506
...whether to walk the path
of the straight and narrow...
8
00:01:30,674 --> 00:01:33,760
...or to succumb to temptation.
9
00:01:33,927 --> 00:01:37,221
Do I write the essay myself...
10
00:01:37,389 --> 00:01:40,767
...or do I copy it verbatim
from Wikipedia?
11
00:01:40,934 --> 00:01:42,935
Not that bright, Van Olsen.
12
00:01:43,103 --> 00:01:46,189
See these questions, this choice...
13
00:01:46,356 --> 00:01:48,691
...comes down to the core
of who you are.
14
00:01:49,485 --> 00:01:52,695
Detention now
leads to prison later, fellas.
15
00:01:52,863 --> 00:01:56,365
So this time is for sitting down...
16
00:01:56,533 --> 00:02:00,203
...and thinking about
how you got from here...
17
00:02:01,705 --> 00:02:03,539
...to here.
18
00:02:04,917 --> 00:02:07,043
It's about accountability.
19
00:02:08,921 --> 00:02:10,755
It's about responsibility.
20
00:02:11,423 --> 00:02:13,049
Community.
21
00:02:16,053 --> 00:02:19,305
Damon Drecker,
can I see you out in the hall, please?
22
00:02:20,057 --> 00:02:21,557
No talking.
23
00:02:27,898 --> 00:02:29,982
What the hell did you do to get detention?
24
00:02:30,150 --> 00:02:31,901
Nothing.
25
00:02:33,946 --> 00:02:38,074
Powell called Mrs. Butchik
"Mrs. Buttcheeks."
26
00:02:39,576 --> 00:02:41,077
Butchik is her given name, son.
27
00:02:41,245 --> 00:02:43,204
- You shouldn't make fun.
- Powell said it.
28
00:02:43,372 --> 00:02:45,331
Who is Powell? This guy?
29
00:02:46,041 --> 00:02:48,501
- Yeah.
- Why are you here?
30
00:02:49,711 --> 00:02:51,003
Just hanging with him.
31
00:02:51,171 --> 00:02:54,048
All right, let me get this straight,
you didn't get detention.
32
00:02:54,216 --> 00:02:58,010
You just decided to spend
the afternoon hanging out...
33
00:02:58,178 --> 00:03:01,138
...in detention with this kid Powell.
34
00:03:01,306 --> 00:03:03,683
Yeah, we're friends.
35
00:03:06,979 --> 00:03:10,857
- What, Dad?
- I don't know. I mean, you know.
36
00:03:11,024 --> 00:03:13,276
- Are you homophobic?
- What are you talking about?
37
00:03:13,443 --> 00:03:17,363
I'm asking you questions about your life.
Come on.
38
00:03:17,531 --> 00:03:20,950
I don't get to see you
that much these days.
39
00:03:21,118 --> 00:03:22,994
Powell's not into labels, Dad.
40
00:03:23,161 --> 00:03:25,621
And quite frankly, neither am I.
41
00:03:25,789 --> 00:03:27,957
Okay, Damester.
42
00:03:30,669 --> 00:03:34,463
Now I'm not above admitting
George Clooney's a handsome man...
43
00:03:34,715 --> 00:03:38,092
...but this was a whole other thing.
44
00:03:38,260 --> 00:03:41,387
Damon and I,
we used to tell each other everything.
45
00:03:53,567 --> 00:03:56,611
- Hello?
- Hi, Patty.
46
00:03:56,778 --> 00:03:59,196
It's me, Tanya.
47
00:04:01,366 --> 00:04:02,617
Why are you calling me?
48
00:04:02,784 --> 00:04:04,785
I wanted to follow up about your...
49
00:04:04,953 --> 00:04:09,332
...appointment
with the happiness consultant.
50
00:04:09,625 --> 00:04:12,084
I'm working on
the Hollopaw deal right now.
51
00:04:12,252 --> 00:04:15,671
I know. I didn't want to bother you,
but how was it?
52
00:04:16,256 --> 00:04:19,717
- I don't want to talk about it.
- Why not?
53
00:04:19,885 --> 00:04:22,762
Just let it die, okay, Tanya?
54
00:04:28,852 --> 00:04:30,269
Patty, I don't understand.
55
00:04:30,437 --> 00:04:33,356
If by your own assertion
the sex was great...
56
00:04:33,523 --> 00:04:38,694
...then shouldn't you be happy?
- Have you ever done coke, Tanya?
57
00:04:39,404 --> 00:04:41,113
Cocaine?
58
00:04:41,865 --> 00:04:44,325
No. I tried peyote a couple of times.
59
00:04:44,493 --> 00:04:47,036
Well, having sex with that guy
is like doing coke.
60
00:04:48,372 --> 00:04:50,539
Because it's expensive,
but you really want it.
61
00:04:50,707 --> 00:04:54,335
So you buy it and then you get
this huge awesome rush.
62
00:04:54,503 --> 00:04:56,879
That's a good thing, right?
A huge awesome rush.
63
00:04:57,047 --> 00:04:59,882
But then you come down
from your high...
64
00:05:00,050 --> 00:05:03,427
...and you're broke and you feel
even lonelier and more pathetic...
65
00:05:03,595 --> 00:05:06,055
...than you did before
and you want to kill yourself.
66
00:05:06,473 --> 00:05:08,975
So I guess you won't be interested...
67
00:05:09,142 --> 00:05:11,519
...in our bimonthly package?
68
00:05:11,687 --> 00:05:14,355
I'm kidding. Patty, look, wait.
69
00:05:14,523 --> 00:05:18,317
Seriously, what would make you interested
in being a repeat customer?
70
00:05:18,485 --> 00:05:19,694
I don't know.
71
00:05:19,861 --> 00:05:22,488
- Maybe if he was like crack.
- Crack?
72
00:05:22,656 --> 00:05:25,908
Yeah, cheap, dirty.
Same high, half the price.
73
00:05:29,287 --> 00:05:32,081
I think my kid's a gay.
74
00:05:33,250 --> 00:05:35,459
- Damon?
- Yeah.
75
00:05:36,586 --> 00:05:38,254
Well, that's great, Ray.
76
00:05:38,422 --> 00:05:42,049
I mean, don't worry. Lots of kids
experiment with their sexuality.
77
00:05:42,217 --> 00:05:44,385
I myself, I had a little thing...
78
00:05:44,553 --> 00:05:46,887
...with this woman Miriam in college...
- Hey, hey.
79
00:05:47,055 --> 00:05:49,432
I don't need to hear about
your lesbian past, Tanya.
80
00:05:49,599 --> 00:05:53,102
We're having a business meeting.
This is business.
81
00:05:53,270 --> 00:05:55,813
All right, well, then I'm gonna
be honest with you, Ray.
82
00:05:55,981 --> 00:06:00,693
We are encountering
a little pushback in our pricing.
83
00:06:00,861 --> 00:06:05,448
I think we might need to consider
lowering our pricing point.
84
00:06:05,615 --> 00:06:07,783
Maybe offering a sliding scale...
85
00:06:07,951 --> 00:06:10,202
...to our lower-income clients.
86
00:06:10,370 --> 00:06:12,705
What are you talking about?
When we started this...
87
00:06:12,873 --> 00:06:15,207
...you said we were
gonna clear two grand a night.
88
00:06:16,543 --> 00:06:18,961
I know. I know I said that.
But do you watch cable news?
89
00:06:19,129 --> 00:06:22,214
Oh, my God, it's Pierce.
Hang on a second, Ray. It's Pierce.
90
00:06:22,382 --> 00:06:24,300
Pierce, are you there?
91
00:06:24,468 --> 00:06:26,552
- Tanya.
- Where are you?
92
00:06:26,720 --> 00:06:28,554
- Cuba. God, I miss you.
- I miss you too.
93
00:06:28,722 --> 00:06:30,181
- Where are you?
- Havana, Cuba.
94
00:06:30,348 --> 00:06:32,808
It's a long story.
I'll be back in a few days.
95
00:06:32,976 --> 00:06:35,603
- What?
- Fuck, I'm running out of minutes.
96
00:06:35,771 --> 00:06:37,813
I've got to go, but I love you...
97
00:06:39,149 --> 00:06:40,816
Who was that?
98
00:06:42,527 --> 00:06:44,987
My boyfriend. He had to go on a trip.
99
00:06:45,155 --> 00:06:48,449
- See? That's what I'm talking about.
- What?
100
00:06:48,617 --> 00:06:50,910
You spend all your time
with this new boyfriend.
101
00:06:51,078 --> 00:06:54,497
- Meanwhile our business is falling apart.
- What are you talking about?
102
00:06:54,664 --> 00:06:58,167
How can I be spending all my time
with my new boyfriend when he's in Cuba?
103
00:06:58,335 --> 00:07:00,461
Now, Ray, I know that you're upset...
104
00:07:00,629 --> 00:07:03,005
...about Damon's homosexual tendencies...
105
00:07:03,173 --> 00:07:06,175
Hey, hey, I promised my kids
they could move back in.
106
00:07:06,343 --> 00:07:08,886
This two grand from Jemma
is a drop in the bucket.
107
00:07:09,054 --> 00:07:12,515
This house, it's not gonna fix itself.
108
00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:16,268
Who do I have to fuck around here
to get my kids back?
109
00:07:16,436 --> 00:07:19,480
I'm trying, Ray. I'm really trying.
110
00:07:19,648 --> 00:07:22,608
These are turbulent times.
111
00:07:25,237 --> 00:07:29,281
Ray, I don't think it sounds right
when you say, "My kid's a gay."
112
00:07:29,491 --> 00:07:31,367
Just, "My kid's gay."
113
00:07:34,079 --> 00:07:35,663
Why didn't you tell me?
114
00:07:35,831 --> 00:07:37,289
There's nothing to tell.
115
00:07:37,457 --> 00:07:39,542
You didn't seem that interested.
116
00:07:39,709 --> 00:07:43,045
I thought you were too obsessed
with Hammer to notice anything anyway.
117
00:07:46,508 --> 00:07:48,300
Have you had sex with him yet?
118
00:07:51,221 --> 00:07:54,056
- Damon.
- What's it to you, Darb?
119
00:07:54,224 --> 00:07:57,393
I mean, you're my twin brother.
Why wouldn't you want to tell me?
120
00:07:57,561 --> 00:08:00,896
- Why do you want to know so bad?
- Because I care.
121
00:08:01,398 --> 00:08:03,107
Come on.
122
00:08:07,571 --> 00:08:10,239
All right, I haven't had sex with him.
123
00:08:10,407 --> 00:08:12,158
Yet.
124
00:08:13,493 --> 00:08:14,910
Wait.
125
00:08:15,412 --> 00:08:17,413
Do you want to?
126
00:08:19,875 --> 00:08:21,584
It's okay. Don't worry. I mean...
127
00:08:21,751 --> 00:08:23,752
...guys are really easy to please.
128
00:08:23,920 --> 00:08:26,922
Go! Oh, come on,
you're almost there, guys.
129
00:08:28,884 --> 00:08:32,761
I give them 10 bucks every time they reach
the top. It's my secret weight-loss plan.
130
00:08:32,929 --> 00:08:34,763
Sounds good.
131
00:08:35,765 --> 00:08:38,184
Hey, don't worry,
I gave up pilates to pay for it.
132
00:08:38,351 --> 00:08:42,771
- It doesn't matter.
- Of course it matters.
133
00:08:46,401 --> 00:08:49,195
I don't need "things."
134
00:08:50,071 --> 00:08:52,239
Material stuff.
135
00:08:52,699 --> 00:08:55,618
Ron, what do I have to do
to make you believe me?
136
00:08:57,412 --> 00:08:59,997
Why did you and your mother
go through my stuff?
137
00:09:02,250 --> 00:09:04,293
- Ron.
- What did you think you were looking for?
138
00:09:04,461 --> 00:09:06,128
Did you think I was lying to you?
139
00:09:06,796 --> 00:09:10,507
- Were you worried that I was broke?
- It was a moment of weakness.
140
00:09:11,635 --> 00:09:13,469
I don't care about the money.
141
00:09:13,637 --> 00:09:15,804
What about your ex-husband?
142
00:09:15,972 --> 00:09:19,350
I do not care about him either.
143
00:09:20,977 --> 00:09:22,978
I love you, Ron.
144
00:09:28,818 --> 00:09:31,153
I just want things to be normal again.
145
00:09:32,864 --> 00:09:34,657
How do we be normal?
146
00:09:35,367 --> 00:09:40,037
I passed signs for that sale that you love.
The Timson Bank sale.
147
00:09:40,205 --> 00:09:41,747
- What about it?
- I want you to go.
148
00:09:41,915 --> 00:09:43,749
No, we can't afford it, Ron.
149
00:09:43,917 --> 00:09:45,584
Look at me.
150
00:09:47,170 --> 00:09:50,839
I'm tired of our lives being reduced
to how much money we have.
151
00:09:51,007 --> 00:09:53,175
I'm sick of it. So what?
152
00:09:53,343 --> 00:09:55,010
We took a hit. Everybody did.
153
00:09:55,178 --> 00:10:00,432
Now, go. I want you to go to the sale.
I want you to buy something. Be happy.
154
00:10:02,894 --> 00:10:04,186
For me.
155
00:10:07,190 --> 00:10:11,402
It's this amazing new service
a friend of mine runs.
156
00:10:11,569 --> 00:10:14,071
For male prostitutes.
157
00:10:14,239 --> 00:10:15,823
Isn't that kind of gross?
158
00:10:15,991 --> 00:10:19,410
Not at all. I think
you would feel empowered.
159
00:10:19,577 --> 00:10:21,578
I know I did.
160
00:10:21,997 --> 00:10:23,747
I don't know.
161
00:10:25,583 --> 00:10:29,211
Well, I know Patty felt empowered too.
162
00:10:31,923 --> 00:10:33,382
Great.
163
00:10:33,883 --> 00:10:37,386
It's a progressive service.
It's very sensitive.
164
00:10:37,554 --> 00:10:39,555
In no way dirty.
165
00:10:39,723 --> 00:10:41,432
Unless you like dirty.
166
00:10:42,392 --> 00:10:45,644
She said it was like doing coke.
I've never tired coke myself.
167
00:10:45,812 --> 00:10:48,564
I did peyote a couple times.
168
00:10:48,732 --> 00:10:52,860
I know the economy is collapsing, but
heck, when you look back at your life...
169
00:10:53,028 --> 00:10:55,738
...do you really want to say
to yourself, "Damn it!
170
00:10:55,905 --> 00:10:59,908
I was such a fuddy-duddy.
I never once paid for sex.
171
00:11:00,076 --> 00:11:02,077
Not even once?"
172
00:11:08,585 --> 00:11:11,503
Good boy. Oh, yes, that's a good boy.
173
00:11:11,671 --> 00:11:13,255
Hello. Hi.
174
00:11:13,423 --> 00:11:16,675
Wow, you have a dog? What's its name?
175
00:11:16,843 --> 00:11:18,469
Patty.
176
00:11:19,012 --> 00:11:21,430
Horny Patty, actually.
177
00:11:22,766 --> 00:11:24,808
You named your dog Horny Patty?
178
00:11:24,976 --> 00:11:26,518
Yeah, I did.
179
00:11:26,686 --> 00:11:29,104
Wonder why I'd do that? Any ideas?
180
00:11:29,272 --> 00:11:32,066
Lenore, are you mad at me?
Is that why you asked me to lunch?
181
00:11:32,233 --> 00:11:34,943
I do have a little bone
to pick with you, T-Brain.
182
00:11:35,111 --> 00:11:37,988
I ran into Horny Patty at the mall...
183
00:11:38,156 --> 00:11:40,824
...and she told me that you told her...
184
00:11:40,992 --> 00:11:44,620
...that Happiness Consultants
was my escort service.
185
00:11:44,788 --> 00:11:47,623
You're using my name
to hawk your product.
186
00:11:47,791 --> 00:11:50,626
Lenore, in that one instance
I did use your name.
187
00:11:50,794 --> 00:11:54,004
- I'm sorry.
- Well, you owe me one.
188
00:11:54,839 --> 00:11:57,216
So how is business anyway?
189
00:11:57,634 --> 00:12:00,552
- Business is brisk.
- I'll bet.
190
00:12:00,720 --> 00:12:03,347
I was thinking I could use
a little Ray myself, actually.
191
00:12:04,307 --> 00:12:06,058
You mean Randall.
192
00:12:06,726 --> 00:12:09,853
No, I mean Ray. I had his wallet, Tanya.
I know his name.
193
00:12:10,021 --> 00:12:13,774
Lenore, Ray's dance card is very full.
194
00:12:13,942 --> 00:12:17,820
Okay, well, why don't you just
send me over one of your other guys.
195
00:12:18,405 --> 00:12:21,156
You don't have any other guys,
do you, T-Brain?
196
00:12:21,825 --> 00:12:24,118
No, you just have the one.
197
00:12:24,285 --> 00:12:26,870
Lenore, I'm in the process
of building a stable...
198
00:12:27,038 --> 00:12:28,831
...of qualified professionals.
199
00:12:28,998 --> 00:12:30,499
Don't bullshit a bullshitter.
200
00:12:30,667 --> 00:12:34,169
You're smart. You do one thing
and you do it well.
201
00:12:34,337 --> 00:12:35,838
Ray's a hot commodity.
202
00:12:36,005 --> 00:12:38,882
He's the right age.
He's got a big fat dick...
203
00:12:39,050 --> 00:12:40,676
...and he knows how to use it.
204
00:12:40,844 --> 00:12:42,553
Send him over tonight.
205
00:12:44,013 --> 00:12:48,559
Lenore, you stole his wallet
and his underwear.
206
00:12:50,019 --> 00:12:51,937
He's never gonna go for it.
207
00:12:52,105 --> 00:12:53,647
Cash upfront.
208
00:12:55,358 --> 00:12:57,568
I'm free after 10.
209
00:13:00,363 --> 00:13:02,906
Lenore. Again.
210
00:13:04,033 --> 00:13:06,910
Tanya should have never sent me there.
211
00:13:07,871 --> 00:13:10,247
- What are we doing here?
- A friend of mine owns it.
212
00:13:10,415 --> 00:13:13,667
- A friend of yours owns it?
- That's right.
213
00:13:13,835 --> 00:13:15,210
I left my wallet in the car...
214
00:13:15,378 --> 00:13:17,379
...so don't get any bright ideas.
215
00:13:21,217 --> 00:13:25,679
- I've already got a suit.
- Yeah, that's a crap suit, Ray.
216
00:13:25,847 --> 00:13:27,055
Try this on.
217
00:13:28,725 --> 00:13:30,726
- What, here?
- Yeah.
218
00:13:30,894 --> 00:13:34,563
Go ahead. It's not like I haven't
seen you in the buff before.
219
00:13:40,737 --> 00:13:42,571
So how's it going with Tanya?
220
00:13:43,406 --> 00:13:44,907
It's going all right.
221
00:13:45,074 --> 00:13:46,783
She's funny, that one.
222
00:13:46,951 --> 00:13:48,911
She means well.
223
00:13:49,078 --> 00:13:50,746
What do you mean?
224
00:13:50,914 --> 00:13:52,998
I don't know. Just funny.
225
00:13:56,211 --> 00:13:58,587
Ray, how much do you think
these shoes are worth?
226
00:13:58,755 --> 00:14:00,422
I don't know.
227
00:14:00,590 --> 00:14:03,592
$79.99. How about these?
228
00:14:03,760 --> 00:14:06,929
- No idea.
- $1,250.
229
00:14:08,181 --> 00:14:10,599
- Come on.
- Do you know why?
230
00:14:10,767 --> 00:14:14,102
Branding.
These shoes are Christian Louboutin.
231
00:14:14,270 --> 00:14:16,188
These shoes are shit.
232
00:14:16,356 --> 00:14:18,941
Women buy the Louboutin because
they're buying quality.
233
00:14:19,108 --> 00:14:23,237
But more importantly they're buying
what the Louboutin represent: The best.
234
00:14:23,404 --> 00:14:25,656
Sounds to me
like you're getting a bad deal.
235
00:14:25,823 --> 00:14:27,282
They don't care.
236
00:14:27,742 --> 00:14:29,826
That's the crucial thing
you need to remember.
237
00:14:29,994 --> 00:14:33,372
Paying more doesn't bother them.
It gives them peace of mind.
238
00:14:33,540 --> 00:14:37,334
If they wear something of value,
that means that they in turn have value.
239
00:14:37,502 --> 00:14:39,962
You shouldn't be lowering
your price in this economy.
240
00:14:40,129 --> 00:14:41,505
You should be raising it.
241
00:14:43,466 --> 00:14:46,635
This is something that Tanya
will never understand.
242
00:14:49,305 --> 00:14:51,056
That's hot.
243
00:15:03,653 --> 00:15:06,321
No, no, no, keep the suit.
244
00:15:08,408 --> 00:15:10,242
All right.
245
00:15:10,410 --> 00:15:12,244
Hold on.
246
00:15:12,996 --> 00:15:15,497
It's time to diversify.
247
00:15:18,585 --> 00:15:22,212
Listen, not all women can
come from just dick alone.
248
00:15:22,380 --> 00:15:25,048
- I haven't heard any complaints.
- That you know of.
249
00:15:28,177 --> 00:15:29,720
It's gonna cost you extra.
250
00:15:37,020 --> 00:15:39,021
Jesus.
251
00:15:45,028 --> 00:15:47,362
Oh, my God.
252
00:15:53,620 --> 00:15:55,579
You know,
some guys have a problem with it.
253
00:15:55,747 --> 00:15:57,623
But not me. I just...
254
00:15:58,499 --> 00:16:01,627
...you know, have to like the lady.
255
00:16:01,794 --> 00:16:03,462
Like the lady?
256
00:16:03,630 --> 00:16:05,297
What are you, a bible salesman?
257
00:16:10,219 --> 00:16:12,888
You don't need to like the lady.
258
00:16:13,056 --> 00:16:15,098
You just need to...
259
00:16:17,185 --> 00:16:18,977
...like the cash.
260
00:16:20,521 --> 00:16:22,522
One of the many words of wisdom...
261
00:16:22,690 --> 00:16:26,234
...that will fall from my mouth
if you play on my team.
262
00:16:29,280 --> 00:16:31,073
- Comfy?
- Yeah.
263
00:16:36,371 --> 00:16:39,790
Oh, that's good, Ray.
264
00:16:41,042 --> 00:16:42,292
Oh, that's...
265
00:16:42,460 --> 00:16:44,044
That's actually quite...
266
00:16:48,216 --> 00:16:51,593
Oh, God. Oh, goodness.
That's really good.
267
00:16:51,761 --> 00:16:53,845
Ray, you really need
to come play on my team.
268
00:16:54,013 --> 00:16:56,848
We should team up. Listen, Tanya,
she doesn't know anyone.
269
00:16:57,016 --> 00:17:00,602
She has no access to wealth.
She can't get you what you need.
270
00:17:01,229 --> 00:17:02,979
Tanya's my friend.
271
00:17:03,147 --> 00:17:05,440
She's also my partner.
272
00:17:05,817 --> 00:17:08,610
Am I paying to argue with you?
273
00:17:09,278 --> 00:17:11,154
Oh, God.
274
00:17:11,447 --> 00:17:12,989
Oh, my God.
275
00:17:13,157 --> 00:17:14,908
You're playing in the minors, Ray.
276
00:17:15,076 --> 00:17:18,245
You are a major-league guy
playing on a minor-league team.
277
00:17:19,789 --> 00:17:21,373
A major-league guy playing...
278
00:17:21,541 --> 00:17:24,543
...for a minor-league team.
279
00:17:34,971 --> 00:17:36,471
Okay.
280
00:17:37,640 --> 00:17:41,101
- You talking shit about me?
- No, Patty. Absolutely not.
281
00:17:41,269 --> 00:17:43,979
This is my workplace.
282
00:17:44,147 --> 00:17:46,690
All right, you're telling people
I did coke and heroin?
283
00:17:46,858 --> 00:17:49,609
- I never said a word about heroin.
- Just listen up! Listen up!
284
00:17:49,777 --> 00:17:53,447
Just because you talked me into paying
for sex with some guy with a big dick...
285
00:17:53,614 --> 00:17:55,907
...does not give you the right
to talk about it.
286
00:17:56,075 --> 00:17:59,494
Don't you ever talk
about me or to me again...
287
00:17:59,662 --> 00:18:01,580
...or I will kick your ass sideways.
288
00:18:01,748 --> 00:18:05,000
- Do you understand? You understand?
- Yes. Uh-huh.
289
00:18:13,926 --> 00:18:16,344
Patty paid for sex?
290
00:18:19,807 --> 00:18:21,391
Linda.
291
00:18:33,196 --> 00:18:36,364
- You never called me.
- Excuse me?
292
00:18:36,532 --> 00:18:39,242
From the nail salon. I offended you
with my potty mouth.
293
00:18:39,410 --> 00:18:41,161
Oh, hi.
294
00:18:41,329 --> 00:18:43,205
- Lenore.
- Right.
295
00:18:43,372 --> 00:18:45,081
Oh, don't, no. No, don't buy that.
296
00:18:45,249 --> 00:18:47,375
That's just a Chloé knock-off
from last season.
297
00:18:47,543 --> 00:18:50,378
There's a cuter chemise
in the Armani section. I'll show you.
298
00:18:50,546 --> 00:18:53,256
Oh, wait, no. I just wanted
to get something on sale.
299
00:18:53,424 --> 00:18:54,466
- Oh.
- Yeah.
300
00:18:54,634 --> 00:18:58,553
You can paw through the racks if you want.
I'm gonna tell you a secret.
301
00:18:58,721 --> 00:19:03,642
I can get you the same exact discount
on the new designer collection. Come on.
302
00:19:03,810 --> 00:19:05,393
Do you work here or something?
303
00:19:05,561 --> 00:19:09,439
- Kind of. I'm a lifestylist.
- Lifestylist?
304
00:19:09,607 --> 00:19:14,069
Yeah, kind of a combo...
305
00:19:14,403 --> 00:19:16,154
...life coach and stylist.
306
00:19:16,322 --> 00:19:18,740
I help people maximize
their personal style.
307
00:19:18,908 --> 00:19:20,242
Oh. L...
308
00:19:20,409 --> 00:19:23,954
Through, you know, fashion,
home decorating, fitness.
309
00:19:24,121 --> 00:19:26,581
- What size are you, a two?
- Oh. I used to be.
310
00:19:26,749 --> 00:19:28,500
I'm a four. Ever since the divorce...
311
00:19:28,668 --> 00:19:30,710
...I just haven't found time to work out.
312
00:19:30,878 --> 00:19:33,088
- Colonics.
- Really?
313
00:19:33,256 --> 00:19:35,257
It sucks it right out. The pounds drop off.
314
00:19:35,424 --> 00:19:37,509
- I have a guy.
- Really?
315
00:19:37,677 --> 00:19:40,595
- Okay, try this dress with this jacket.
- No, I really shouldn't.
316
00:19:40,763 --> 00:19:43,557
I did just want to just
pick up something on sale.
317
00:19:43,724 --> 00:19:46,768
Oh, all right. I just thought
that the cut would help with your...
318
00:19:46,936 --> 00:19:49,020
...problem area.
319
00:19:49,605 --> 00:19:51,606
You think?
320
00:19:53,067 --> 00:19:54,943
I'm taking a little survey.
321
00:19:55,111 --> 00:19:57,779
Can you have an orgasm from just cock...
322
00:19:57,947 --> 00:20:00,991
...or do you need a guy
to go down on you to get off?
323
00:20:01,534 --> 00:20:03,451
I can't answer that.
324
00:20:03,619 --> 00:20:05,620
I've asked a bunch of my clients.
325
00:20:05,788 --> 00:20:09,332
Seems like the ratio
is 60-40 tongue to dick.
326
00:20:10,167 --> 00:20:12,002
Well?
327
00:20:15,381 --> 00:20:16,756
Tongue helps.
328
00:20:20,136 --> 00:20:21,720
That looks amazing.
329
00:20:22,138 --> 00:20:24,723
And then the Happiness Consultant
meets you...
330
00:20:24,891 --> 00:20:27,475
...at a destination of your choice...
331
00:20:27,643 --> 00:20:29,644
...for a night of erotic adventure.
332
00:20:30,396 --> 00:20:32,522
Sounds good.
333
00:20:33,566 --> 00:20:36,985
Now there's the small matter of payment.
334
00:20:37,153 --> 00:20:39,529
Lenore likes for her
clients to pay upfront.
335
00:20:39,697 --> 00:20:41,156
Great.
336
00:20:44,785 --> 00:20:48,538
Oh, I'm sorry, Linda.
We'll need the full amount.
337
00:20:49,332 --> 00:20:52,834
Our service costs $600.
338
00:20:53,002 --> 00:20:55,337
I have 50.
339
00:20:55,504 --> 00:20:59,257
- You said there was a sliding scale.
- Right. There is.
340
00:20:59,425 --> 00:21:01,384
Okay, I get it.
341
00:21:01,552 --> 00:21:04,346
We can offer you $100 off...
342
00:21:04,513 --> 00:21:07,474
...and give you our service for $400.
343
00:21:09,685 --> 00:21:12,354
I mean 500. $100 off six.
344
00:21:15,858 --> 00:21:17,275
I can pay 50.
345
00:21:18,361 --> 00:21:21,780
Linda, I don't understand
what you're saying to me.
346
00:21:23,741 --> 00:21:27,827
$400 is my final offer.
347
00:21:30,081 --> 00:21:32,540
Fif... Fifty.
348
00:21:34,460 --> 00:21:37,295
Linda. Linda, this is insulting.
349
00:21:37,797 --> 00:21:40,882
No, no, no, it really is.
350
00:21:42,093 --> 00:21:43,635
No deal.
351
00:21:52,812 --> 00:21:55,021
I'd like a brioche, please.
352
00:21:55,189 --> 00:21:56,731
Sure.
353
00:21:57,400 --> 00:21:59,401
So that's terrible.
354
00:21:59,568 --> 00:22:01,736
- Same thing, different color.
- Oh.
355
00:22:01,904 --> 00:22:04,572
I'm sorry, Jessica. What the hell?
356
00:22:04,740 --> 00:22:06,950
- I look great in that.
- Yeah, in 1989 maybe.
357
00:22:07,118 --> 00:22:09,828
- But no longer, no.
- Jess, are you home?
358
00:22:09,996 --> 00:22:12,539
Oh, hey, Ron. Come upstairs.
359
00:22:12,707 --> 00:22:15,333
I want you to meet a friend of mine.
360
00:22:16,585 --> 00:22:18,753
- Hey, baby.
- Oh, you're home.
361
00:22:19,964 --> 00:22:23,341
Lenore, this is Ron. Ron, Lenore.
362
00:22:23,509 --> 00:22:25,635
Hi. So nice to meet you.
363
00:22:25,803 --> 00:22:27,595
You guys went shopping?
364
00:22:27,763 --> 00:22:30,348
I know. I was only gonna
pick up one little thing.
365
00:22:30,516 --> 00:22:34,644
But then I met Lenore and she's amazing.
366
00:22:34,812 --> 00:22:37,605
She helped me find the best stuff.
367
00:22:37,773 --> 00:22:40,108
I just help women be their best selves.
368
00:22:40,276 --> 00:22:42,444
And you bought all this?
369
00:22:42,611 --> 00:22:45,447
I know it looks like a lot,
but Lenore gets a 15 percent discount...
370
00:22:45,614 --> 00:22:47,949
...on every item over 100 bucks.
371
00:22:49,618 --> 00:22:51,036
I...
372
00:22:53,622 --> 00:22:56,458
...got this one for you.
- That's great, Jess.
373
00:22:56,625 --> 00:22:58,376
What's the return policy
on this stuff?
374
00:22:58,544 --> 00:23:02,047
All sales are final
because of the discount.
375
00:23:02,631 --> 00:23:05,800
Okay, great. That's... That... Great.
376
00:23:05,968 --> 00:23:08,219
Nice to meet you, Lenore.
377
00:23:09,055 --> 00:23:10,764
- Ron, are you mad?
- No. No.
378
00:23:10,931 --> 00:23:13,808
I'm happy when you're happy, Jess.
379
00:23:19,607 --> 00:23:23,485
Jessica, stop it.
380
00:23:24,195 --> 00:23:25,737
Stop what?
381
00:23:25,905 --> 00:23:29,908
Stop handing out your love
like you're a 10th grade slut.
382
00:23:30,076 --> 00:23:33,036
Stop letting your kids and your husband...
383
00:23:33,204 --> 00:23:34,496
...walk all over you.
384
00:23:34,663 --> 00:23:36,331
Repeat after me:
385
00:23:36,499 --> 00:23:39,667
I have the power. Say it.
386
00:23:45,341 --> 00:23:47,008
Say it.
387
00:23:47,510 --> 00:23:49,844
- I have the power.
- Say it again.
388
00:23:50,012 --> 00:23:51,137
I have the power.
389
00:23:51,305 --> 00:23:53,848
- I don't believe you.
- I have the motherfucking power!
390
00:24:03,067 --> 00:24:06,027
Fifty bucks? That's insulting.
Why are we talking about it?
391
00:24:06,195 --> 00:24:07,946
It's actually not that insulting, Ray.
392
00:24:08,114 --> 00:24:10,031
Patty said you were like cocaine.
393
00:24:10,199 --> 00:24:12,659
She says you were...
She compared you to crack, okay?
394
00:24:12,827 --> 00:24:15,620
- Shh.
- That's the effect you have on these women.
395
00:24:15,788 --> 00:24:18,164
So just have sex with Linda.
396
00:24:18,332 --> 00:24:21,417
Just give her a taste.
Give her a little bump, you know.
397
00:24:21,585 --> 00:24:23,545
And then she'll keep
coming back for more.
398
00:24:23,712 --> 00:24:25,505
Lenore says...
399
00:24:25,673 --> 00:24:29,008
...we should be charging 1500 bucks a pop
for a night with me.
400
00:24:29,176 --> 00:24:32,053
Well, I'd like to see her
try to get 1500 bucks.
401
00:24:32,221 --> 00:24:35,014
She says we should be raising our prices,
not lowering them.
402
00:24:35,182 --> 00:24:38,059
These women, they need to feel
like they're worth something.
403
00:24:38,227 --> 00:24:40,478
When were you talking
to Lenore about all this?
404
00:24:40,646 --> 00:24:42,564
When we were having sex.
405
00:24:43,357 --> 00:24:45,984
Ray, don't talk to Lenore.
406
00:24:46,152 --> 00:24:48,403
I'm not comfortable with that.
407
00:24:49,113 --> 00:24:51,948
- Who do you want me to talk to instead?
- Talk to me.
408
00:24:52,116 --> 00:24:54,117
We are going to figure this out.
409
00:24:54,285 --> 00:24:56,369
Ray.
- I'm late for detention.
410
00:24:56,537 --> 00:24:58,454
I believe in us.
411
00:26:18,619 --> 00:26:21,663
- Oh, hey, Ray.
- You all right, man?
412
00:26:24,208 --> 00:26:26,209
Music department got the ax today.
413
00:26:27,836 --> 00:26:29,754
Gutting the arts, coach.
414
00:26:29,922 --> 00:26:31,506
Taking a steak knife...
415
00:26:31,674 --> 00:26:34,717
...and carving the heart
right out of our schools.
416
00:26:36,303 --> 00:26:38,846
They're gonna be coming for us any day.
417
00:26:39,014 --> 00:26:41,432
No, Mike. We're safe.
418
00:26:42,268 --> 00:26:45,186
Everybody loves sports.
31552
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