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1
00:00:07,640 --> 00:00:09,476
Previously, on "A.P. Bio..."
2
00:00:11,678 --> 00:00:13,713
Little tweetie bastard.
He got me again.
3
00:00:13,747 --> 00:00:15,391
Yeah, he was just... just
perched up there, you know,
4
00:00:15,415 --> 00:00:16,459
waiting for me
to get out of my car.
5
00:00:16,483 --> 00:00:17,660
So I'm gonna go
kill it right now.
6
00:00:17,684 --> 00:00:19,386
You guys should
cut class today too.
7
00:00:19,419 --> 00:00:21,121
But I have perfect attendance.
8
00:00:21,154 --> 00:00:22,322
Hey, loosen up.
Loosen up.
9
00:00:22,355 --> 00:00:23,556
In fact, you know what?
10
00:00:23,590 --> 00:00:24,734
If you don't walk out
of this class right now,
11
00:00:24,758 --> 00:00:26,459
I will mark you absent.
12
00:00:26,493 --> 00:00:30,163
All right, now does anyone
know where I can buy a gun?
13
00:00:30,196 --> 00:00:32,332
Probably everywhere, right?
Yeah?
14
00:00:34,167 --> 00:00:36,536
Raw horse meat.
15
00:00:36,569 --> 00:00:38,338
It's a delicacy in Japan.
16
00:00:38,371 --> 00:00:40,206
I'll try it.
17
00:00:40,240 --> 00:00:42,242
My pallet is sophisticated.
18
00:00:43,510 --> 00:00:45,178
Arigato.
19
00:00:46,546 --> 00:00:48,348
Marissa, give me your jacket.
20
00:00:48,381 --> 00:00:49,492
Give me your jacket.
21
00:00:49,516 --> 00:00:51,217
Gimme your jacket.
22
00:00:51,251 --> 00:00:53,253
You just crapped your capris,
didn't you?
23
00:00:55,288 --> 00:00:57,657
Also previously
on "A.P. Bio..."
24
00:00:57,691 --> 00:01:00,160
The donor insemination worked.
25
00:01:00,193 --> 00:01:01,561
It's positive!
26
00:01:01,594 --> 00:01:03,530
They've all been positive.
27
00:01:03,563 --> 00:01:05,231
It's weird that
you keep checking.
28
00:01:05,265 --> 00:01:06,509
Ooh, girl.
You know I'm thorough.
29
00:01:06,533 --> 00:01:08,301
And you can never be too sure.
30
00:01:08,335 --> 00:01:09,636
Ooh.
Ow.
31
00:01:09,669 --> 00:01:11,438
The legs are growing.
32
00:01:11,471 --> 00:01:12,372
Oh, no.
No, no, wait.
33
00:01:12,405 --> 00:01:13,406
I'm... I'm still here.
34
00:01:13,440 --> 00:01:15,642
No... yeah, I understand.
35
00:01:15,675 --> 00:01:17,177
Bad news.
36
00:01:18,378 --> 00:01:19,546
The mall's shut down.
37
00:01:24,417 --> 00:01:26,286
Well, fundraiser
raised enough cash
38
00:01:26,319 --> 00:01:29,456
for Pam's veterinary bills,
but time is running out!
39
00:01:29,489 --> 00:01:32,392
She's one of the most
important rams in my life.
40
00:01:35,261 --> 00:01:37,464
Jack, are you leaving?
Uh, yes.
41
00:01:37,497 --> 00:01:40,300
I'm going to do some,
uh, bird watching.
42
00:01:40,333 --> 00:01:41,701
For Biology.
43
00:01:41,735 --> 00:01:44,404
I got a real ram-ergency
on my hands.
44
00:01:44,437 --> 00:01:46,449
Would you deposit this in
Pam's account at First Federal?
45
00:01:46,473 --> 00:01:47,574
No, I...
46
00:01:47,607 --> 00:01:49,275
I gotta go give her
a sponge bath.
47
00:01:49,309 --> 00:01:50,443
Stat!
48
00:01:57,751 --> 00:02:00,453
Also previously
on "A.P. Bio..."
49
00:02:01,788 --> 00:02:04,290
Now that's the kind
of guy who skips class.
50
00:02:04,324 --> 00:02:05,558
Travis.
51
00:02:05,592 --> 00:02:07,627
He's the baddest boy in school.
52
00:02:07,660 --> 00:02:10,330
I heard he's a drug dealer.
53
00:02:10,363 --> 00:02:11,431
Out of my way, nerds.
54
00:02:11,464 --> 00:02:12,599
Oh!
55
00:02:12,632 --> 00:02:15,435
Sir, you dropped your...
56
00:02:15,468 --> 00:02:18,338
drug money.
57
00:02:20,573 --> 00:02:22,542
God, I hope Pam pulls through.
58
00:02:22,575 --> 00:02:24,744
No principal should
outlive their mascot.
59
00:02:24,778 --> 00:02:27,580
Hey, do we really need
all the trees
60
00:02:27,614 --> 00:02:28,815
outside around the school?
61
00:02:28,848 --> 00:02:30,383
Did you make the deposit?
62
00:02:30,417 --> 00:02:31,551
The... the... the deposit?
63
00:02:31,584 --> 00:02:32,719
Wh... oh!
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
64
00:02:32,752 --> 00:02:35,455
Yeah.
65
00:02:35,488 --> 00:02:37,323
Well, that's gone.
But you know what?
66
00:02:37,357 --> 00:02:38,734
I'm more than happy
to help cover the...
67
00:02:38,758 --> 00:02:41,461
Pam's $10,000 is gone?
68
00:02:41,494 --> 00:02:43,296
She's gonna die without it.
69
00:02:43,329 --> 00:02:45,598
Uh, yeah... no.
Like you said, um,
70
00:02:45,632 --> 00:02:49,302
you know, I'm more than happy
to help find the thief
71
00:02:49,336 --> 00:02:51,671
who stole it off my desk!
72
00:02:53,740 --> 00:02:55,809
Well, where are we gonna
do our mall walks?
73
00:02:55,842 --> 00:02:58,611
Do we break into the school
at night and do them here?
74
00:02:58,645 --> 00:03:01,314
Oh, you know what?
I like that idea.
75
00:03:01,348 --> 00:03:02,716
Let's keep it just between us.
76
00:03:02,749 --> 00:03:04,751
You guys, I am so sorry.
77
00:03:04,784 --> 00:03:07,287
I just texted
our whole mall walking group.
78
00:03:07,320 --> 00:03:09,889
Oh, tell me you didn't
include Mr. "On your Left!"
79
00:03:09,923 --> 00:03:12,359
I'm bad at secrets!
80
00:03:13,793 --> 00:03:15,562
We should invest it.
I'm telling you.
81
00:03:15,595 --> 00:03:17,664
In mutual bonds.
82
00:03:17,697 --> 00:03:20,600
We can't spend this!
It's too hot.
83
00:03:20,633 --> 00:03:22,535
And until we know what to do,
84
00:03:22,569 --> 00:03:24,671
Victor holds the money.
85
00:03:31,411 --> 00:03:32,579
I'm holding the money now.
86
00:03:42,389 --> 00:03:44,924
These thirsty boys
can't be trusted.
87
00:03:47,894 --> 00:03:50,430
Also previously
on "A.P. Bio..."
88
00:03:51,564 --> 00:03:52,532
Oh.
Oh!
89
00:03:52,565 --> 00:03:53,566
Hey, excuse me.
90
00:03:53,600 --> 00:03:55,535
Yeah, no.
My bad.
91
00:03:55,568 --> 00:03:56,779
I don't think
we've officially met.
92
00:03:56,803 --> 00:03:58,338
Gary, geometry.
93
00:03:58,371 --> 00:04:00,407
I'm Dave, geology.
94
00:04:00,440 --> 00:04:02,676
Such a pleasure.
Here we are.
95
00:04:02,709 --> 00:04:03,853
Yeah.
Do you want some coffee?
96
00:04:03,877 --> 00:04:04,944
Yeah.
97
00:04:04,978 --> 00:04:06,413
That's exactly
98
00:04:06,446 --> 00:04:07,547
what I was gonna drink.
99
00:04:09,649 --> 00:04:11,751
Hm.
100
00:04:13,386 --> 00:04:15,422
Why would anyone dance
like no one's watching?
101
00:04:15,455 --> 00:04:17,457
That doesn't make any sense.
102
00:04:17,490 --> 00:04:18,792
Who would do this?
103
00:04:18,825 --> 00:04:21,494
Well, I know a few women
who are none too pleased
104
00:04:21,528 --> 00:04:22,729
with my behaviors.
105
00:04:22,762 --> 00:04:24,898
And you wanna know
the worst part?
106
00:04:24,931 --> 00:04:27,701
Stuff like this tends
to get me more followers
107
00:04:27,734 --> 00:04:29,936
on my Whitlock live stream.
108
00:04:35,975 --> 00:04:38,878
Coach, can I tell you something?
109
00:04:38,912 --> 00:04:41,548
My wife is coming to visit me
at work tomorrow.
110
00:04:41,581 --> 00:04:44,451
Okay.
Why is your nose sweatin'?
111
00:04:44,484 --> 00:04:47,454
'Cause I might have told her
that... I'm a teacher.
112
00:04:47,487 --> 00:04:49,856
Oh, man.
113
00:04:49,889 --> 00:04:52,926
You're in trouble.
114
00:05:02,502 --> 00:05:04,871
Have you seen an envelope
with 10 grand?
115
00:05:04,904 --> 00:05:06,873
I'm the one who found the money.
116
00:05:06,906 --> 00:05:08,908
I am the money finder!
117
00:05:08,942 --> 00:05:11,478
Keep it up, you're gonna
find my foot in your ass.
118
00:05:11,511 --> 00:05:13,480
Are you wearing a wire?
Hey...
119
00:05:13,513 --> 00:05:15,015
It's my puka shell necklace.
120
00:05:15,048 --> 00:05:17,484
I... I was trying something new.
121
00:05:17,517 --> 00:05:19,986
Grandma told me I should've
gone to parochial school.
122
00:05:20,020 --> 00:05:22,922
But no, I needed
to have a drama program.
123
00:05:22,956 --> 00:05:24,891
Well, here's your drama,
Anthony!
124
00:05:24,924 --> 00:05:27,694
Why did I try horse again?
125
00:05:27,727 --> 00:05:29,029
All right, y'all.
Stop, stop.
126
00:05:29,062 --> 00:05:30,597
STOP!
127
00:05:31,698 --> 00:05:33,900
The money is tearing us apart.
Don't y'all see that?
128
00:05:33,933 --> 00:05:36,670
We're gonna return
everything that we bought,
129
00:05:36,703 --> 00:05:39,673
and then we're gonna give
the money back to Travis.
130
00:05:39,706 --> 00:05:41,741
That's the only way
we're gonna be free, y'all.
131
00:05:44,611 --> 00:05:46,046
I've always had this coat.
132
00:05:47,681 --> 00:05:49,816
Also previously
on "A.P. Bio..."
133
00:05:49,849 --> 00:05:52,485
I've been vandalized.
134
00:05:52,519 --> 00:05:55,522
And do you wanna know
who the real homewrecker is?
135
00:05:55,555 --> 00:05:58,058
It's the guy reno-ing
my bathroom.
136
00:05:58,091 --> 00:05:59,993
He came in with a sledgehammer...
137
00:06:00,026 --> 00:06:01,928
Joyce.
You did it.
138
00:06:01,961 --> 00:06:03,630
I'm sick.
I'm sick.
139
00:06:03,663 --> 00:06:04,698
I'm sick.
I'm sick.
140
00:06:04,731 --> 00:06:05,799
Please don't hate me.
141
00:06:05,832 --> 00:06:07,734
Of course not.
You're my friend.
142
00:06:07,767 --> 00:06:10,070
I would do anything for you.
143
00:06:10,103 --> 00:06:11,538
Anything?
144
00:06:12,806 --> 00:06:14,874
Dale!
There you are.
145
00:06:14,908 --> 00:06:16,776
I just went
into the ladies room,
146
00:06:16,810 --> 00:06:19,079
and one of the toilets
is clogged up again,
147
00:06:19,112 --> 00:06:20,680
so could you take
a look at that?
148
00:06:20,714 --> 00:06:23,550
Maybe hit it
with the fecal snake.
149
00:06:23,583 --> 00:06:25,752
Thanks.
Hi.
150
00:06:25,785 --> 00:06:27,305
What a weird thing
to say to a teacher.
151
00:06:28,722 --> 00:06:29,899
Normally, people just ask me
about outer space
152
00:06:29,923 --> 00:06:30,890
or bibliographies.
Mm-hmm.
153
00:06:30,924 --> 00:06:32,692
Good morning.
154
00:06:32,726 --> 00:06:34,728
I'm Dick.
I'm the principal.
155
00:06:34,761 --> 00:06:36,563
Of the school.
156
00:06:41,134 --> 00:06:43,703
That was Pam's veterinarian.
Oh.
157
00:06:43,737 --> 00:06:45,071
Pam's taken a turn
for the worse.
158
00:06:45,105 --> 00:06:47,574
If she doesn't
get surgery soon...
159
00:06:49,542 --> 00:06:51,111
It's bad news.
160
00:06:52,979 --> 00:06:54,781
Hey, Winston.
Hey.
161
00:06:54,814 --> 00:06:56,983
It's Ralph!
I was thinking.
162
00:06:57,017 --> 00:06:58,718
What if we got
the ska band back together?
163
00:06:58,752 --> 00:07:00,920
Huh? Yeah, do a couple
of benefit shows.
164
00:07:00,954 --> 00:07:03,656
Make some, uh...
Oh, you never broke up?
165
00:07:03,690 --> 00:07:06,993
Oh.
You...
166
00:07:07,027 --> 00:07:09,562
Oh, you just kicked me out.
167
00:07:09,596 --> 00:07:10,997
Hey, Mom!
Hey!
168
00:07:11,031 --> 00:07:13,900
Listen.
Um, how much money do you have?
169
00:07:13,933 --> 00:07:17,837
Okay, and that's supposed
to last you...
170
00:07:17,871 --> 00:07:20,040
through the rest of the time?
171
00:07:20,073 --> 00:07:21,808
'Cause you know...
172
00:07:21,841 --> 00:07:23,743
It's just like oatmeal
and Mr. Pibb with you.
173
00:07:23,777 --> 00:07:26,146
I don't... what else are you
spending the money on?
174
00:07:26,179 --> 00:07:30,583
How much for a mint condition
Sensation Comics ♪1,
175
00:07:30,617 --> 00:07:33,586
the first-ever cover appearance
of Wonder Woman.
176
00:07:33,620 --> 00:07:35,689
Really?
Oh, okay.
177
00:07:35,722 --> 00:07:37,590
How would I get one of those?
178
00:07:41,861 --> 00:07:44,006
I thought it was at least
something more like surprising.
179
00:07:44,030 --> 00:07:44,998
No way.
180
00:07:45,031 --> 00:07:47,067
On your left!
181
00:07:47,100 --> 00:07:49,002
Oh, hell no!
182
00:07:53,173 --> 00:07:54,650
Thank you.
I appreciate your cough drop.
183
00:07:54,674 --> 00:07:55,942
That was very nice.
184
00:07:55,975 --> 00:07:57,043
Hmph.
185
00:07:57,077 --> 00:07:58,912
Oh.
Hey, Gary.
186
00:08:09,222 --> 00:08:11,791
Also previously
on "A.P. Bio..."
187
00:08:13,793 --> 00:08:15,862
I know what kind
of person you are,
188
00:08:15,895 --> 00:08:17,197
and I know what you can do.
189
00:08:17,230 --> 00:08:20,800
So, your money is in my locker.
190
00:08:30,643 --> 00:08:32,645
Oh, quit faking, you old baby.
191
00:08:35,915 --> 00:08:37,984
Oh, no.
That's not good.
192
00:08:38,018 --> 00:08:39,019
Oh.
193
00:08:39,052 --> 00:08:40,920
I'm calling 911.
194
00:08:40,954 --> 00:08:43,790
Oh, God.
Are we gonna get in trouble?
195
00:08:43,823 --> 00:08:45,101
Um, a medical emergency
on school grounds?
196
00:08:45,125 --> 00:08:46,826
Yeah.
197
00:08:46,860 --> 00:08:49,062
All right, if we all
just keep our mouths shut,
198
00:08:49,095 --> 00:08:50,630
we'll all be okay.
199
00:08:56,202 --> 00:08:59,773
So, uh, we cut class
like you told us to.
200
00:08:59,806 --> 00:09:02,842
And we ended up with this.
201
00:09:04,911 --> 00:09:06,846
Uh...
202
00:09:06,880 --> 00:09:08,124
It seems that
the drug dealer and I
203
00:09:08,148 --> 00:09:10,183
have had
a deep misunderstanding.
204
00:09:10,216 --> 00:09:12,819
Yeah?
205
00:09:15,021 --> 00:09:17,924
Somebody at this school knows
where that stolen money is!
206
00:09:17,957 --> 00:09:20,126
I'm declaring martial law.
207
00:09:20,160 --> 00:09:21,728
Attention, Whitlock.
208
00:09:21,761 --> 00:09:23,263
The school is officially
on lockdown.
209
00:09:23,296 --> 00:09:24,698
Lock it up!
210
00:09:25,432 --> 00:09:26,592
Our community has experienced
211
00:09:26,733 --> 00:09:27,893
a serious violation of trust.
212
00:09:28,034 --> 00:09:29,034
Not funny!
213
00:09:29,302 --> 00:09:30,302
No one is leaving
214
00:09:30,870 --> 00:09:30,904
until we get
to the bottom of it.
215
00:09:31,404 --> 00:09:32,772
Don't even try it.
216
00:09:33,740 --> 00:09:35,742
Helen and I are coming
to every classroom.
217
00:09:35,775 --> 00:09:38,244
And may God have mercy
on your souls.
218
00:09:40,013 --> 00:09:41,848
Was that about us?
219
00:09:41,881 --> 00:09:44,884
We... are... hosed.
220
00:09:47,954 --> 00:09:49,889
That was definitely about us.
221
00:09:49,923 --> 00:09:51,825
Mm-hmm.
222
00:09:51,858 --> 00:09:54,761
We are deeply, deeply hosed.
223
00:10:10,977 --> 00:10:12,312
One, two, three, four!
224
00:10:12,345 --> 00:10:15,048
♪ Next time,
I'll listen to my heart ♪
225
00:10:15,081 --> 00:10:17,717
♪ Next time,
well, I'll be smart ♪
226
00:10:27,861 --> 00:10:29,362
And now, "A.P. Bio."
227
00:10:32,065 --> 00:10:33,833
Why did we let in
228
00:10:33,867 --> 00:10:35,835
that old dude with a weak heart?
229
00:10:35,869 --> 00:10:38,204
I mean, it felt so good
smoking his old ass,
230
00:10:38,238 --> 00:10:39,839
but at what cost?
231
00:10:39,873 --> 00:10:41,975
I mean, now he's sitting
pretty in the hospital
232
00:10:42,008 --> 00:10:44,077
and we're probably
gonna lose our damn jobs.
233
00:10:44,110 --> 00:10:45,845
I can't lose my job!
234
00:10:45,879 --> 00:10:47,089
Keith just subscribed
to one of those
235
00:10:47,113 --> 00:10:49,849
expensive meal delivery
services.
236
00:10:49,883 --> 00:10:50,993
We're gonna get out of this.
237
00:10:51,017 --> 00:10:52,194
We just have to get
our story straight
238
00:10:52,218 --> 00:10:53,887
before Durbin
starts sniffing around.
239
00:10:53,920 --> 00:10:55,121
Yeah.
240
00:10:55,155 --> 00:10:56,956
Yeah, like weren't sneaking in.
Mm-mm!
241
00:10:56,990 --> 00:10:58,391
Okay, we were staying late.
242
00:10:58,425 --> 00:10:59,993
Grading papers.
243
00:11:00,026 --> 00:11:00,994
Yeah.
Yeah.
244
00:11:01,027 --> 00:11:02,395
And the old dude was...
245
00:11:02,429 --> 00:11:05,265
an Uber driver,
uh, and we had to call him
246
00:11:05,298 --> 00:11:06,800
because I was having
car trouble.
247
00:11:06,833 --> 00:11:08,134
Yes.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
248
00:11:08,168 --> 00:11:10,403
And he begged, okay,
to come into the school, okay?
249
00:11:10,437 --> 00:11:12,038
Because he...
250
00:11:12,072 --> 00:11:13,182
He always had a weird thing
about peeing
251
00:11:13,206 --> 00:11:15,875
in the smaller toilets
you find in school bathrooms.
252
00:11:17,077 --> 00:11:20,013
Or we just say he had to pee.
253
00:11:20,046 --> 00:11:21,815
Okay, it's simple.
254
00:11:21,848 --> 00:11:23,316
Grading, Uber, pee.
Right, okay.
255
00:11:23,350 --> 00:11:24,918
Grading, Uber, pee.
256
00:11:24,951 --> 00:11:27,020
You got it, Michelle?
You can do this.
257
00:11:27,053 --> 00:11:28,988
That's the same thing
you said when I caught you
258
00:11:29,022 --> 00:11:30,423
eating Steph's last fudge pop,
259
00:11:30,457 --> 00:11:32,158
and I just told her now,
260
00:11:32,192 --> 00:11:33,827
and I'm still telling her!
261
00:11:33,860 --> 00:11:35,161
Somebody stop me.
Help!
262
00:11:35,195 --> 00:11:36,363
Just stick to the script.
263
00:11:36,396 --> 00:11:37,831
Okay, Michelle?
Yeah.
264
00:11:37,864 --> 00:11:39,165
Mary,
265
00:11:39,199 --> 00:11:41,167
you owe my baby some fudge.
266
00:11:43,203 --> 00:11:44,838
Hey, hey.
Calm down.
267
00:11:44,871 --> 00:11:46,106
Hey, hey!
Chill out.
268
00:11:46,139 --> 00:11:47,283
Principal Durbin
and Ms. Demarcus
269
00:11:47,307 --> 00:11:48,408
are going to be here soon.
270
00:11:48,441 --> 00:11:50,243
What do we do?
We're dead.
271
00:11:50,276 --> 00:11:52,278
You can all go down for this,
but not me.
272
00:11:52,312 --> 00:11:53,313
I'm clean.
273
00:11:53,346 --> 00:11:55,081
Your pants might disagree.
274
00:11:56,349 --> 00:11:58,084
Private joke.
Just ignore it.
275
00:11:58,118 --> 00:12:00,053
You got diarrhea
from eating horse meat.
276
00:12:00,086 --> 00:12:01,254
They filled me in.
277
00:12:01,287 --> 00:12:03,056
Look, it might be embarrassing,
278
00:12:03,089 --> 00:12:04,924
but at least it's not illegal.
279
00:12:04,958 --> 00:12:06,960
You know, she's right.
Okay?
280
00:12:06,993 --> 00:12:08,304
Your petty little squabbles
are nothing compared
281
00:12:08,328 --> 00:12:10,363
to Possession with
Intent to Distribute.
282
00:12:10,397 --> 00:12:12,065
We need a plan here.
283
00:12:12,098 --> 00:12:14,300
We could flush it,
get the little fishies
284
00:12:14,334 --> 00:12:16,436
in the Maumee River
all hopped up good.
285
00:12:17,971 --> 00:12:19,472
Speaking hypothetically,
286
00:12:19,506 --> 00:12:21,941
I don't think the
school's plumbing can handle
287
00:12:21,975 --> 00:12:23,486
even a simple pair
of cotton underwear,
288
00:12:23,510 --> 00:12:26,079
let alone... all of that.
289
00:12:26,112 --> 00:12:28,081
We're not flushing anything,
okay?
290
00:12:28,114 --> 00:12:29,358
We're gonna hide the drugs
until we can sell them
291
00:12:29,382 --> 00:12:31,384
and get the money back.
292
00:12:31,418 --> 00:12:34,087
I hate to be that guy, but...
293
00:12:34,120 --> 00:12:35,989
you're all drug dealers now.
294
00:12:39,426 --> 00:12:42,395
And that's basically
the Vietnam War.
295
00:12:42,429 --> 00:12:45,065
Definitely no picnic.
296
00:12:45,098 --> 00:12:46,166
Okay?
297
00:12:46,199 --> 00:12:48,968
Helen, Principal Durbin.
298
00:12:49,002 --> 00:12:50,437
Welcome.
299
00:12:50,470 --> 00:12:52,038
I think you know why we're here.
300
00:12:52,072 --> 00:12:54,107
If anyone has anything
301
00:12:54,140 --> 00:12:57,210
they would like
to own up to first...
302
00:12:57,243 --> 00:12:58,978
Yeah.
Right.
303
00:12:59,012 --> 00:13:00,947
Um, okay, so see,
what had happened was,
304
00:13:00,980 --> 00:13:03,049
um, if y'all were curious,
305
00:13:03,083 --> 00:13:04,160
is that we were here last night.
306
00:13:04,184 --> 00:13:06,052
Grading papers.
307
00:13:06,086 --> 00:13:09,089
Um, and we called an Uber
because Mary had car trouble.
308
00:13:09,122 --> 00:13:10,290
What?
Yeah.
309
00:13:10,323 --> 00:13:12,992
Corollas are
usually so reliable!
310
00:13:13,026 --> 00:13:16,296
Yeah.
You know, of course they are.
311
00:13:16,329 --> 00:13:19,399
Uh, but her tires were slashed.
312
00:13:19,432 --> 00:13:22,068
What is happening
at this school?
313
00:13:22,102 --> 00:13:23,546
Now we gotta go check out
the parking lot, I guess.
314
00:13:23,570 --> 00:13:25,405
Oh, you checking out
the parking lot...
315
00:13:25,438 --> 00:13:28,008
You know, you guys know
an amusing thing
316
00:13:28,041 --> 00:13:30,443
about pregnant women is how
frequently they urinate.
317
00:13:30,477 --> 00:13:32,312
So, excuse me.
318
00:13:36,383 --> 00:13:38,051
Have you guys
texted your friends
319
00:13:38,084 --> 00:13:39,519
about buying some cocaine?
320
00:13:39,552 --> 00:13:42,022
I mean, I feel like
you're not helping here. Wh...
321
00:13:42,055 --> 00:13:44,057
You made us skip.
You lost the money.
322
00:13:44,090 --> 00:13:45,525
It's kind of all your fault.
323
00:13:45,558 --> 00:13:47,293
Well, let's...
324
00:13:47,327 --> 00:13:49,996
Let's set that aside
for the moment, Sarika, okay?
325
00:13:50,030 --> 00:13:52,165
Let's... let's fish that out
of a clogged toilet,
326
00:13:52,198 --> 00:13:53,500
ball it up, and throw it deep
327
00:13:53,533 --> 00:13:56,202
into the bathroom garbage,
okay, for the moment.
328
00:13:56,236 --> 00:13:58,314
For the moment, maybe toss a
few paper towels on top, okay?
329
00:13:58,338 --> 00:14:00,006
'Cause I'm not
going down for this!
330
00:14:00,040 --> 00:14:02,208
If they come for you, boss,
I'll take the fall.
331
00:14:02,242 --> 00:14:03,452
I thought I'd be
the first in my family
332
00:14:03,476 --> 00:14:05,078
to go to college,
333
00:14:05,111 --> 00:14:07,047
but instead,
I'll be the 19th in my family
334
00:14:07,080 --> 00:14:08,281
to go to jail.
335
00:14:08,314 --> 00:14:10,583
Okay, no.
Heather, you can't do that.
336
00:14:10,617 --> 00:14:13,586
Look, I'll confess to it all.
337
00:14:13,620 --> 00:14:15,355
I'll take the fall for you.
338
00:14:15,388 --> 00:14:17,991
Aww.
339
00:14:18,024 --> 00:14:20,193
Dan, no.
340
00:14:20,226 --> 00:14:22,262
You're a good friend.
341
00:14:22,295 --> 00:14:25,999
I can't let you
go down for this.
342
00:14:26,032 --> 00:14:28,201
I'll take the fall.
343
00:14:31,571 --> 00:14:34,074
S-somebody gonna...
344
00:14:34,107 --> 00:14:37,177
That daisy-chain
lost momentum quickly.
345
00:14:37,210 --> 00:14:39,579
No, no one person
is taking the fall for this.
346
00:14:39,612 --> 00:14:41,348
We'll find a place
to hide it, okay?
347
00:14:41,381 --> 00:14:43,316
I mean, obviously we can't
keister it, you know?
348
00:14:43,350 --> 00:14:45,985
If you change your mind,
I do have 16 condoms.
349
00:14:47,454 --> 00:14:50,223
Well, th... uh...
350
00:14:50,256 --> 00:14:51,591
Good.
351
00:14:51,624 --> 00:14:54,027
I support that.
352
00:14:54,060 --> 00:14:56,229
But what's something else?
353
00:14:56,262 --> 00:14:58,565
Eyes on your own paper, Marie.
354
00:14:58,598 --> 00:15:00,066
Oh.
355
00:15:00,100 --> 00:15:01,234
So real quick.
356
00:15:01,267 --> 00:15:03,103
Mary's tires
got slashed last night
357
00:15:03,136 --> 00:15:05,271
when we were
here together working.
358
00:15:05,305 --> 00:15:07,207
Grading, Uber, pee.
Right.
359
00:15:07,240 --> 00:15:09,042
Plus, when Durbin
came to my classroom,
360
00:15:09,075 --> 00:15:10,643
I told him that
we stayed extra late
361
00:15:10,677 --> 00:15:12,345
because we're all writing a play
362
00:15:12,379 --> 00:15:14,514
called "The Princess
and the Snow Cone."
363
00:15:14,547 --> 00:15:16,116
A play?
No, no, no.
364
00:15:16,149 --> 00:15:17,393
Don't even worry about it.
It's super simple.
365
00:15:17,417 --> 00:15:19,552
Okay, the king
of an ancient tropical land
366
00:15:19,586 --> 00:15:21,421
tells the princess
that she can have anything
367
00:15:21,454 --> 00:15:23,423
that her heart desires
for her birthday.
368
00:15:23,456 --> 00:15:26,292
But he never counted on her
asking for a snow cone,
369
00:15:26,326 --> 00:15:29,129
an impossible wish due
to the lack of refrigeration
370
00:15:29,162 --> 00:15:31,398
and aforementioned tropicality.
371
00:15:31,431 --> 00:15:33,266
Also there's a bear?
372
00:15:33,299 --> 00:15:35,602
I think I got this, okay?
I can do it.
373
00:15:35,635 --> 00:15:37,303
Good morning, Ralph.
374
00:15:37,337 --> 00:15:39,406
Mm... that was too forced, right?
375
00:15:39,439 --> 00:15:41,274
Good morning, Ralph.
No, that's the same.
376
00:15:41,307 --> 00:15:42,609
Welcome to the classroom, Ralph.
377
00:15:42,642 --> 00:15:44,244
Ralph, hello.
378
00:15:44,277 --> 00:15:45,554
Everybody gets
into accidents walking.
379
00:15:45,578 --> 00:15:47,280
Some people
have to practice walking.
380
00:15:47,313 --> 00:15:49,549
Yoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
It's okay.
381
00:15:49,582 --> 00:15:52,085
It's okay.
Everybody take a breath.
382
00:15:52,118 --> 00:15:54,187
You all take a breath too.
Tale a breath in and out.
383
00:15:54,220 --> 00:15:56,289
In and out!
But keep your eyes down.
384
00:15:56,322 --> 00:15:57,691
You keep your eyes up!
385
00:15:57,724 --> 00:15:59,292
Ralph, get out of my classroom!
386
00:15:59,325 --> 00:16:01,094
Nobody can come in here!
387
00:16:01,127 --> 00:16:02,429
This is my room!
388
00:16:02,462 --> 00:16:04,264
Oh, God.
They're closing in.
389
00:16:04,297 --> 00:16:05,565
Okay, Jack.
Um, think.
390
00:16:05,598 --> 00:16:07,267
We've gotta hide it.
Um...
391
00:16:07,300 --> 00:16:08,511
What do we do, what do we do,
what do we do?
392
00:16:08,535 --> 00:16:09,636
Um...
393
00:16:14,708 --> 00:16:17,143
And this guy starts like,
"Oh!"
394
00:16:17,177 --> 00:16:18,445
I can't believe she caved.
395
00:16:18,478 --> 00:16:20,213
Like, really, really.
396
00:16:20,246 --> 00:16:22,315
And we didn't know
what to do with him!
397
00:16:22,349 --> 00:16:24,451
Yes.
We did it.
398
00:16:24,484 --> 00:16:26,720
It was us.
399
00:16:26,753 --> 00:16:29,689
We are the ones
that brought the ice down
400
00:16:29,723 --> 00:16:31,358
from the misty mountains.
401
00:16:31,391 --> 00:16:33,293
Take this back to the princess,
402
00:16:33,326 --> 00:16:36,463
and she can have her snow cone!
403
00:16:37,497 --> 00:16:39,265
Curtain.
Intermission.
404
00:16:39,299 --> 00:16:42,202
Wow, that... that all happens
in act 1?
405
00:16:42,235 --> 00:16:44,738
That's amazing!
I have a few notes.
406
00:16:44,771 --> 00:16:48,274
I feel like it owes a big debt
to "Emperor's New Groove."
407
00:16:48,308 --> 00:16:50,377
Well, yeah, that's... oh!
Oh.
408
00:16:50,410 --> 00:16:53,446
Michelle was telling us about
the new play you guys wrote.
409
00:16:53,480 --> 00:16:55,491
Oh, my God, Ralph, we have
to go find the missing money.
410
00:16:55,515 --> 00:16:57,484
We... oh, my God.
411
00:16:57,517 --> 00:16:59,686
Did she say "missing money"?
412
00:16:59,719 --> 00:17:02,322
I can't wait to see
the rest of this.
413
00:17:02,355 --> 00:17:04,424
I can't believe
you open in a week!
414
00:17:12,632 --> 00:17:14,334
Little bit more...
415
00:17:14,367 --> 00:17:15,635
Little bit more... oh!
416
00:17:15,669 --> 00:17:18,705
Just about...
417
00:17:18,738 --> 00:17:20,540
Hi.
Hey.
418
00:17:20,573 --> 00:17:23,476
Durbin, Helen.
Yeah, come on in.
419
00:17:23,510 --> 00:17:25,679
So yeah, as you guys can see,
standing up on something
420
00:17:25,712 --> 00:17:28,682
flexes the tibialis
interior muscle
421
00:17:28,715 --> 00:17:30,617
which stabilizes
the leg and the foot.
422
00:17:30,650 --> 00:17:33,253
Oh!
423
00:17:33,286 --> 00:17:34,287
Yeah.
424
00:17:34,320 --> 00:17:35,355
Oh, okay.
425
00:17:35,388 --> 00:17:37,457
Well, we'll just
make this quick.
426
00:17:37,490 --> 00:17:39,559
We are looking for a...
427
00:17:51,838 --> 00:17:54,207
Any update on Pam?
428
00:17:58,545 --> 00:18:00,413
On the next "A.P. Bio..."
429
00:18:02,749 --> 00:18:04,617
I know exactly what that is.
430
00:18:04,651 --> 00:18:07,253
We snorted a lot
of it in the '80s.
431
00:18:07,287 --> 00:18:08,855
It's pure baking flour.
432
00:18:10,357 --> 00:18:12,459
It's called a bread bump.
433
00:18:15,462 --> 00:18:18,331
Yeah, so I found the guy who
sold Victor that fake cocaine.
434
00:18:18,365 --> 00:18:19,866
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I tackled him,
435
00:18:19,899 --> 00:18:21,410
and he whipped around
and grabbed my throat.
436
00:18:21,434 --> 00:18:22,602
Gouge his eyes!
437
00:18:22,635 --> 00:18:24,337
Yeah, uh,
well, this already happened.
438
00:18:24,371 --> 00:18:25,405
Oh, right.
Yeah.
439
00:18:25,438 --> 00:18:27,674
So, anyway, um, I broke free.
440
00:18:27,707 --> 00:18:29,509
And I had an opening
for a death blow,
441
00:18:29,542 --> 00:18:31,711
but I didn't wanna kill him
'cause he's a student.
442
00:18:31,745 --> 00:18:34,280
I wish more of our teachers
had your restraint.
443
00:18:34,314 --> 00:18:36,616
So, long story short...
444
00:18:36,649 --> 00:18:37,884
I got the money back.
445
00:18:37,917 --> 00:18:39,686
So who is it?
446
00:18:39,719 --> 00:18:41,688
I can never tell.
447
00:18:41,721 --> 00:18:43,289
He's an undercover cop.
448
00:18:43,323 --> 00:18:45,625
What?
449
00:18:45,658 --> 00:18:47,494
Yeah, so we better just,
you know,
450
00:18:47,527 --> 00:18:48,637
look the other way on this one.
451
00:18:48,661 --> 00:18:49,905
And that's coming down
from the brass.
452
00:18:49,929 --> 00:18:50,897
Oh!
453
00:18:50,930 --> 00:18:52,599
Pam!
454
00:18:52,632 --> 00:18:53,600
We gotta get our sweet princess
to the veterinarian.
455
00:18:53,633 --> 00:18:55,368
Let's go, let's go, let's go.
Thank you.
456
00:18:55,402 --> 00:18:57,737
Also on the
next "A.P. Bio..."
457
00:18:57,771 --> 00:19:00,840
You're the principal, yes?
458
00:19:00,874 --> 00:19:02,742
You're richer than teacher?
459
00:19:02,776 --> 00:19:04,477
Powerful?
460
00:19:04,511 --> 00:19:06,413
Uh, yes, I'm the top dog.
461
00:19:06,446 --> 00:19:08,448
I'm the
♪ 1 guy.
462
00:19:15,822 --> 00:19:17,891
Oh, my sweet princess,
463
00:19:17,924 --> 00:19:19,793
how I failed thee.
464
00:19:19,826 --> 00:19:22,395
What need I hands
if not to deliver to you
465
00:19:22,429 --> 00:19:24,531
thy cone of snow?
466
00:19:24,564 --> 00:19:27,534
Ow!
467
00:19:27,567 --> 00:19:29,536
Shit. Sorry.
468
00:19:30,970 --> 00:19:33,740
Also on
the next "A.P. Bio..."
469
00:19:33,773 --> 00:19:36,676
So yours truly snuck out
his back window, right,
470
00:19:36,710 --> 00:19:38,511
when his lady got home.
471
00:19:38,545 --> 00:19:41,548
There you are,
you man-stealing bitch!
472
00:19:41,581 --> 00:19:42,749
You slept with my boyfriend,
473
00:19:42,782 --> 00:19:44,684
biology teacher Jack Griffin!
474
00:19:44,718 --> 00:19:46,419
So what if I did?
475
00:19:46,453 --> 00:19:48,655
And by the way, he was terrible.
476
00:19:49,789 --> 00:19:51,558
Gotta go.
Back soon.
477
00:19:51,591 --> 00:19:52,968
Okay, I love the part
about Jack being bad in bed.
478
00:19:52,992 --> 00:19:54,561
Oh, thank you.
479
00:19:54,594 --> 00:19:55,838
Did we get a good
cliffhanger for you?
480
00:19:55,862 --> 00:19:57,430
Oh, yeah.
481
00:19:57,464 --> 00:19:58,908
The pigs are definitely
sniffing around
482
00:19:58,932 --> 00:19:59,966
for a mushroom.
483
00:20:02,936 --> 00:20:05,372
Hey, it's Dave, right?
484
00:20:05,405 --> 00:20:07,440
Off, Gary.
485
00:20:11,644 --> 00:20:13,880
Thanks, King Dad.
486
00:20:13,913 --> 00:20:15,715
And I never could have done it
487
00:20:15,749 --> 00:20:19,452
without the indigenous peoples
of this place.
488
00:20:32,899 --> 00:20:34,501
Whoo-hoo-hoo.
489
00:20:34,534 --> 00:20:36,936
Also on
the next "A.P. Bio..."
490
00:20:36,970 --> 00:20:39,506
Pam the Ram made it
through surgery, Ralph!
491
00:20:39,539 --> 00:20:40,573
Yeah!
492
00:20:40,607 --> 00:20:42,442
Ow, oh.
493
00:20:42,475 --> 00:20:43,877
Helen...
494
00:20:43,910 --> 00:20:45,745
did you give her
one of your kidneys?
495
00:20:47,013 --> 00:20:49,849
Life is crazy.
496
00:20:49,883 --> 00:20:53,553
It's crazy that Pam the Ram
survived this whole transplant,
497
00:20:53,586 --> 00:20:56,022
only to be hit by a bus.
498
00:20:56,056 --> 00:20:58,725
And it's even crazier
that she survived
499
00:20:58,758 --> 00:21:00,560
being hit by a bus
500
00:21:00,593 --> 00:21:02,696
and that this
501
00:21:02,729 --> 00:21:04,898
is the bus driver's funeral.
502
00:21:04,931 --> 00:21:07,434
You know, Neil Young said,
503
00:21:07,467 --> 00:21:09,769
"It's better to burn out
than fade away."
504
00:21:09,803 --> 00:21:12,038
And Def Leppard quoted him
505
00:21:12,072 --> 00:21:14,040
in their song, "Rock of Ages,"
506
00:21:14,074 --> 00:21:16,810
which Deborah's niece
will now play
507
00:21:16,843 --> 00:21:18,812
on the trombone.
508
00:21:18,845 --> 00:21:20,580
Ophelia?35234
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