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1
00:00:37,800 --> 00:00:40,669
Hey, this stool is making a
new sound when I spin on it.
2
00:00:40,671 --> 00:00:43,138
It's somewhere right
between seal the animal
3
00:00:43,140 --> 00:00:44,907
And seal the amazing singer.
4
00:00:46,977 --> 00:00:48,911
I'd buy that stool's album.
Hey, hey.
5
00:00:48,913 --> 00:00:51,647
No having fun. You
kids are grounded.
6
00:00:51,649 --> 00:00:53,415
Here's something fun. I need
someone to run the old grease
7
00:00:53,417 --> 00:00:54,550
Out to the dumpster.
8
00:00:54,552 --> 00:00:56,385
Don't talk about mom that way.
9
00:00:56,387 --> 00:00:57,519
Mom, are you still mad?
10
00:00:57,521 --> 00:00:58,754
You grounded us four hours ago.
11
00:00:58,756 --> 00:01:00,389
We've grown so much since then.
12
00:01:00,391 --> 00:01:01,890
Yes. I'm still mad.
13
00:01:01,892 --> 00:01:03,659
And I'm gonna be mad
about it forever.
14
00:01:03,661 --> 00:01:04,993
But it's the weekend.
15
00:01:04,995 --> 00:01:06,828
Everybody's supposed
to go to bernie's!
16
00:01:06,830 --> 00:01:08,664
Come on, lin. I-I know you...
No!
17
00:01:08,666 --> 00:01:12,167
Can I just... L-lin. Not
talking about it. Ever.
18
00:01:12,169 --> 00:01:14,903
Oh. Here comes aunt gayle. And
I know this sounds crazy,
19
00:01:14,905 --> 00:01:16,738
But she looks like she's crying.
20
00:01:16,740 --> 00:01:18,707
Oh, god. She can't
just stop by, can she?
21
00:01:18,709 --> 00:01:20,442
Why don't we have a panic room?
22
00:01:20,444 --> 00:01:24,713
Well, my life is ruined.
23
00:01:24,715 --> 00:01:26,548
Oh, god. What's wrong?
24
00:01:26,550 --> 00:01:30,218
Oh, linda, you remember
that guy I met on cat chat?
25
00:01:30,220 --> 00:01:32,754
Stacy? Yeah...
26
00:01:32,756 --> 00:01:36,224
Wait, men can be named stacy?
I love america!
27
00:01:36,226 --> 00:01:39,027
Well, we were supposed
to go see yarnival...
28
00:01:39,029 --> 00:01:41,597
It's like cirque du
soleil but with cats...
29
00:01:41,599 --> 00:01:44,433
And then he canceled. So
I guess I'll take bob.
30
00:01:44,435 --> 00:01:47,469
Oh. Uh, no. No, no, no.
No. J... No.
31
00:01:47,471 --> 00:01:49,805
I'll go with you, aunt gayle.
We've been meaning to hang out
32
00:01:49,807 --> 00:01:51,807
For ages but couldn't make our
calendars work, remember?
33
00:01:51,809 --> 00:01:53,742
No, take me! I yearn for yarn.
34
00:01:53,744 --> 00:01:56,078
Please, gayle! I need
to breathe outside air!
35
00:01:56,080 --> 00:01:57,946
I need to touch the wind!
36
00:01:57,948 --> 00:02:01,049
Wow, you guys really want
to hang out with me.
37
00:02:01,051 --> 00:02:03,719
Ah, they only want to go
'cause they're grounded.
38
00:02:03,721 --> 00:02:04,753
Why are they grounded? Well...
39
00:02:04,755 --> 00:02:06,822
No reason! I just felt like it.
40
00:02:06,824 --> 00:02:09,057
They're not allowed to go.
Okay, fine.
41
00:02:09,059 --> 00:02:11,660
I'll go by myself. That's okay.
42
00:02:11,662 --> 00:02:13,729
I can use the empty
seat next to me
43
00:02:13,731 --> 00:02:15,964
To slump into when I die alone!
44
00:02:15,966 --> 00:02:19,835
All right, fine.
45
00:02:19,837 --> 00:02:21,803
One of them can go. I
don't care which one.
46
00:02:21,805 --> 00:02:24,006
They're all equally terrible.
Eeny, meeny...
47
00:02:24,008 --> 00:02:25,807
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Hold up there.
48
00:02:25,809 --> 00:02:27,809
You have to let us
compete for it.
49
00:02:27,811 --> 00:02:30,312
To the death. No.
No death, louise.
50
00:02:30,314 --> 00:02:32,848
Or we could, I don't
know, maybe go by, uh,
51
00:02:32,850 --> 00:02:34,182
Who has the biggest ding dong.
52
00:02:34,184 --> 00:02:35,684
Gene. Mmm?
53
00:02:35,686 --> 00:02:37,319
No. I'll tell you
what you're gonna do.
54
00:02:37,321 --> 00:02:38,854
You're gonna do
something you hate.
55
00:02:38,856 --> 00:02:40,856
Let me see. What do you hate?
Nachos?
56
00:02:40,858 --> 00:02:42,824
Homework. That's what
you're gonna do.
57
00:02:42,826 --> 00:02:43,859
You're gonna do math.
58
00:02:43,861 --> 00:02:45,327
Or we could write essays.
59
00:02:45,329 --> 00:02:47,496
How dare you. Never!
60
00:02:47,498 --> 00:02:49,665
What a great idea, tina.
I love it.
61
00:02:49,667 --> 00:02:51,199
Since I'm the one
with the tickets,
62
00:02:51,201 --> 00:02:53,135
I want the essays
to be about me!
63
00:02:53,137 --> 00:02:57,205
I want action,
adventure, love, drama.
64
00:02:57,207 --> 00:02:58,840
And scott bakula.
65
00:02:58,842 --> 00:03:00,542
Oh, god. All right,
you heard the lady.
66
00:03:00,544 --> 00:03:02,844
Your time starts... Now!
67
00:03:04,514 --> 00:03:06,515
Linda: And time. Pencils down.
68
00:03:06,517 --> 00:03:08,850
Okay, who's up?
Who's gonna read?
69
00:03:08,852 --> 00:03:10,886
I'll go first because I
have the biggest ding dong!
70
00:03:10,888 --> 00:03:13,789
Gene. Mmm. My story is called
71
00:03:13,791 --> 00:03:15,157
"the ballad of gayle
and jo gene."
72
00:03:15,159 --> 00:03:16,692
And I hope you
brought your hankies
73
00:03:16,694 --> 00:03:18,560
And some toilet paper,
'cause there's not
74
00:03:18,562 --> 00:03:20,796
Gonna be a dry eye or
butt in the house.
75
00:03:20,798 --> 00:03:22,798
The place: Nashville, tennessee.
76
00:03:22,800 --> 00:03:24,900
It was a hot, sweaty
night, and the patrons
77
00:03:24,902 --> 00:03:27,469
At the fiddle of the road
saloon couldn't wait to hear
78
00:03:27,471 --> 00:03:28,737
Their favorite act,
79
00:03:28,739 --> 00:03:30,706
Lindette and jo gene.
80
00:03:30,708 --> 00:03:34,076
They had the glitz and glam
to make you say, "hot damn!"
81
00:03:34,078 --> 00:03:35,977
? la, la, la, la, la, la, la ?
82
00:03:35,979 --> 00:03:39,881
Lana loves a llama, but
the llama loves pajamas.
83
00:03:39,883 --> 00:03:42,484
Y'all sound great, lindette.
I better.
84
00:03:42,486 --> 00:03:45,821
Lou belchera is here, the big
fancy hollywood singing agent.
85
00:03:45,823 --> 00:03:48,690
So don't screw it up for me.
86
00:03:48,692 --> 00:03:51,693
A-one, a-two, a-one,
two, three, four.
87
00:03:51,695 --> 00:03:54,930
? Oh, the sheriff had a piggy ?
88
00:03:54,932 --> 00:03:56,898
? and he was mighty mad ?
89
00:03:56,900 --> 00:04:00,268
? he saw me a-coming and
my wiener he did grab ?
90
00:04:00,270 --> 00:04:03,004
? now I can't quit cryin' and
life just ain't no fun ?
91
00:04:03,006 --> 00:04:04,606
? 'cause a fat dog
ate my hot dog ?
92
00:04:04,608 --> 00:04:07,109
? and I got nothin' but the bun.
? yeehaw!
93
00:04:07,111 --> 00:04:09,778
Wow. Wowee, wow, wow, wow.
94
00:04:09,780 --> 00:04:11,780
Hi, kids.
95
00:04:11,782 --> 00:04:13,949
I'm lou belchera,
hollywood singing agent,
96
00:04:13,951 --> 00:04:16,918
And I'm gonna cut to the chase.
I like what you did out there.
97
00:04:16,920 --> 00:04:19,387
I liked it a lot. And I'd
like you to be my client
98
00:04:19,389 --> 00:04:21,890
And compete in the big ole
opry sing-off next Friday.
99
00:04:21,892 --> 00:04:23,225
What do you say?
100
00:04:23,227 --> 00:04:24,359
We say yes!
101
00:04:24,361 --> 00:04:25,627
No, not you, fumble weed.
102
00:04:25,629 --> 00:04:27,295
The tall one with the big yams.
103
00:04:27,297 --> 00:04:30,799
I'm sorry, but we're a duo.
No! I'm going solo!
104
00:04:30,801 --> 00:04:32,434
Wait, what? No. Yes!
105
00:04:32,436 --> 00:04:36,104
Yes, yes, yes, yes! ? Yes... ?
106
00:04:36,106 --> 00:04:37,372
But what about me?!
107
00:04:37,374 --> 00:04:38,940
What about you? You heard her.
108
00:04:38,942 --> 00:04:40,809
I'm a star. No,
109
00:04:40,811 --> 00:04:42,878
Not yet, you aren't, lady. But
if you win the big sing-off
110
00:04:42,880 --> 00:04:45,447
Tomorrow night, I'll take you to
hollywood and give you a mansion
111
00:04:45,449 --> 00:04:49,251
And introduce you to, uh, I don't know, mr.
Scott bakula?
112
00:04:49,253 --> 00:04:51,153
Yay! Get out of here, jo gene.
113
00:04:51,155 --> 00:04:52,888
I'm like a rhinestone rainbow
114
00:04:52,890 --> 00:04:54,623
And you're like a trunk
full of wet boots.
115
00:04:54,625 --> 00:04:56,892
Fine! But I'm taking the
rest of the cold cuts!
116
00:04:56,894 --> 00:04:59,895
And my sequin tube top!
And my dreams!
117
00:04:59,897 --> 00:05:01,830
And the pepperoncinis!
118
00:05:01,832 --> 00:05:04,599
Take whatever you want, you little pig.
And the crudit�s.
119
00:05:04,601 --> 00:05:07,969
Don't you touch that crudit�s!
It's mine!
120
00:05:09,406 --> 00:05:11,072
Shot of hot fudge with
a root beer back.
121
00:05:11,074 --> 00:05:13,842
Leave the bottle.
122
00:05:13,844 --> 00:05:16,011
Tough night, huh?
123
00:05:16,013 --> 00:05:18,647
My singin' partner up and left me.
Oh, man.
124
00:05:18,649 --> 00:05:22,684
My singin' partner up and
left me 15 years ago.
125
00:05:22,686 --> 00:05:25,453
But look at me now.
I'm doing great!
126
00:05:25,455 --> 00:05:27,422
Here it comes. Ah!
127
00:05:27,424 --> 00:05:28,857
Oh, god. Gayle!
128
00:05:28,859 --> 00:05:30,826
Come clean up this throw-up.
129
00:05:30,828 --> 00:05:35,030
Gayle: ? there's
lipstick on his pickup ?
130
00:05:35,032 --> 00:05:39,935
? there's mascara
on the wheels ?
131
00:05:39,937 --> 00:05:43,705
? I looked inside
the glove box ?
132
00:05:43,707 --> 00:05:48,944
? and I found a red high heel. ?
133
00:05:48,946 --> 00:05:52,347
Well, pinch my loaf.
That girl can sing.
134
00:05:56,018 --> 00:05:58,820
Those pipes you got sound like
they came straight from heaven.
135
00:05:58,822 --> 00:06:01,122
Ugh, the bathroom pipes?
Sorry they're clogged.
136
00:06:01,124 --> 00:06:03,992
People keep putting tampons down 'em.
Even the sinks.
137
00:06:03,994 --> 00:06:06,494
No, no. I meant your pipes.
Your singing ones.
138
00:06:06,496 --> 00:06:08,063
My name's jo gene,
and I'm looking
139
00:06:08,065 --> 00:06:09,865
For a new singing partner.
140
00:06:09,867 --> 00:06:12,667
I'm not really a singer. I'm
just a beautiful waitress
141
00:06:12,669 --> 00:06:15,303
Who cleans up
throw-ups in a bar.
142
00:06:15,305 --> 00:06:16,905
Not anymore you're not.
Let's get you
143
00:06:16,907 --> 00:06:19,374
To the all-night rhinestone
warehouse quick.
144
00:06:20,877 --> 00:06:22,677
Linda: The preposterous
ostrich's legs
145
00:06:22,679 --> 00:06:24,212
Were monstrous.
146
00:06:24,214 --> 00:06:26,047
Sally struthers' other
brother's her mother.
147
00:06:26,049 --> 00:06:28,683
Well, howdy, former pardner.
148
00:06:28,685 --> 00:06:30,986
Wha? What are you
doing here, jo gene?
149
00:06:30,988 --> 00:06:32,888
I came here to win
with my new partner!
150
00:06:32,890 --> 00:06:36,057
We've got this in the bag. But
not this bag I'm holding,
151
00:06:36,059 --> 00:06:38,927
Because that has
my sandwich in it!
152
00:06:38,929 --> 00:06:40,729
Get out of here! Ah!
Not my eyes!
153
00:06:40,731 --> 00:06:42,931
I need them for eye exams!
154
00:06:42,933 --> 00:06:44,566
Psst. Hey. Stage girl.
155
00:06:44,568 --> 00:06:46,101
Yes? I need you to put
156
00:06:46,103 --> 00:06:47,769
A rattlesnake into
someone's guitar for me.
157
00:06:47,771 --> 00:06:49,004
Yes, ma'am.
158
00:06:49,006 --> 00:06:52,073
? I'll... ?
159
00:06:52,075 --> 00:06:54,342
? trade you these tears
for a couple of beers ?
160
00:06:54,344 --> 00:06:57,112
? and this snot for a
shot of whiskey... ?
161
00:06:57,114 --> 00:06:59,014
Oh, she's good.
162
00:06:59,016 --> 00:07:00,916
Yeah. She's real good.
163
00:07:00,918 --> 00:07:02,751
? ...Too frisky. ?
164
00:07:02,753 --> 00:07:04,953
Let's hear it for lindette!
165
00:07:04,955 --> 00:07:07,188
Now a brand-new duo.
166
00:07:07,190 --> 00:07:08,957
He used to be
lindette's partner,
167
00:07:08,959 --> 00:07:12,027
And she used to be a waitress
who cleaned up throw-ups.
168
00:07:12,029 --> 00:07:14,696
Let's give a big nashville
welcome to gayle and jo gene!
169
00:07:14,698 --> 00:07:18,099
We call this one "I
won't go solo on you."
170
00:07:18,101 --> 00:07:19,968
? well, I got to
use the restroom ?
171
00:07:19,970 --> 00:07:21,937
? but there ain't
a stall for two ?
172
00:07:21,939 --> 00:07:23,605
? so squeeze on in and
don't breathe in ?
173
00:07:23,607 --> 00:07:25,140
? 'cause I won't
go solo on you ?
174
00:07:26,910 --> 00:07:29,077
Um, I think there's a
snake in my guitar.
175
00:07:29,079 --> 00:07:30,478
Use it.
176
00:07:30,480 --> 00:07:32,981
? Well, I'd like
to eat spaghetti ?
177
00:07:32,983 --> 00:07:34,950
? but you want vindaloo ?
178
00:07:34,952 --> 00:07:36,551
? so I'll leave in a hurry
and order some curry ?
179
00:07:36,553 --> 00:07:38,086
? 'cause I won't
go solo on you ?
180
00:07:38,088 --> 00:07:40,789
? oh, you and me ?
? you and me ?
181
00:07:40,791 --> 00:07:42,590
Both: ? we're together
through and through ?
182
00:07:42,592 --> 00:07:45,093
? so if you move to china ?
183
00:07:45,095 --> 00:07:47,996
? I'll be right behind ya ?
184
00:07:47,998 --> 00:07:51,967
? 'cause I won't go solo on you. ?
185
00:07:51,969 --> 00:07:53,134
Both: Yeehaw!
186
00:07:58,141 --> 00:08:01,142
And the winner is...
Gayle and jo gene!
187
00:08:01,144 --> 00:08:03,812
And that wacky snake! What?
That's my snake!
188
00:08:03,814 --> 00:08:06,147
I should win! Oh, my face!
189
00:08:06,149 --> 00:08:08,416
Gene: So lou belchera signed
them and took them to hollywood,
190
00:08:08,418 --> 00:08:12,087
Where they saw the hollywood
sign and met scott bakula!
191
00:08:12,089 --> 00:08:14,089
I come to the second "o"
in the hollywood sign
192
00:08:14,091 --> 00:08:15,123
When I'm feeling sad,
193
00:08:15,125 --> 00:08:17,993
But, oh, boy, am I
glad I met you.
194
00:08:17,995 --> 00:08:21,029
And lindette ended up married
to the old drunk from the bar
195
00:08:21,031 --> 00:08:24,165
Because she was a mean person
who liked grounding people
196
00:08:24,167 --> 00:08:25,367
And going solo.
197
00:08:26,970 --> 00:08:28,770
Aw, nuts.
198
00:08:28,772 --> 00:08:31,773
The end. Oh, I just
loved it, gene!
199
00:08:31,775 --> 00:08:34,809
Well, I hated it. Boo.
You win, gene!
200
00:08:34,811 --> 00:08:36,845
? I won't go solo on you. ?
201
00:08:36,847 --> 00:08:38,847
Come on! Let's go!
202
00:08:38,849 --> 00:08:41,116
Whoa! Whoa, whoa, whoa! Wait!
What about my story?
203
00:08:41,118 --> 00:08:43,018
And more importantly, my story.
204
00:08:43,020 --> 00:08:44,619
Oh, right, right.
205
00:08:44,621 --> 00:08:46,187
My story is called "lady
chatterteeth's lover."
206
00:08:46,189 --> 00:08:48,023
The sisters chatterteeth
207
00:08:48,025 --> 00:08:50,992
Were the most beautiful sisters
in all of withering wharf,
208
00:08:50,994 --> 00:08:53,828
Especially gayle. She was
what you'd call a ten.
209
00:08:53,830 --> 00:08:56,064
She had an almost equally
beautiful sister, tina.
210
00:08:56,066 --> 00:08:58,500
She was like a nine.
Nine and a half, maybe.
211
00:08:58,502 --> 00:09:00,835
Also there was eugenia and
louisa, but they were
212
00:09:00,837 --> 00:09:02,871
Less important and not
that much fun in general.
213
00:09:02,873 --> 00:09:04,406
Though gayle was
extremely beautiful,
214
00:09:04,408 --> 00:09:06,174
She was also extremely shy.
215
00:09:06,176 --> 00:09:08,009
Gayle, could you please
pass me the bread?
216
00:09:08,011 --> 00:09:10,178
Sorry. I can't. I'm too shy.
217
00:09:10,180 --> 00:09:13,148
And the sisters were poor.
Very, very poor.
218
00:09:13,150 --> 00:09:14,883
My petticoats are unspeakable!
219
00:09:14,885 --> 00:09:16,684
The sisters got by
as seamstresses,
220
00:09:16,686 --> 00:09:18,253
Sewing the butts back
on to soldiers' pants
221
00:09:18,255 --> 00:09:21,056
When they were shot off in battle.
Mmm...
222
00:09:21,058 --> 00:09:24,225
Tina longed to marry
lord jimmy jr.,
223
00:09:24,227 --> 00:09:26,061
Whose butt had been spared
in battle, but according
224
00:09:26,063 --> 00:09:28,196
To the law of the land,
she couldn't do so
225
00:09:28,198 --> 00:09:30,231
Until her eldest sister
gayle was married first.
226
00:09:30,233 --> 00:09:32,200
So many fallen butts.
227
00:09:32,202 --> 00:09:34,936
Why for not can there
be an end to this war?
228
00:09:34,938 --> 00:09:37,505
At least we have the rich man's
ball to look forward to.
229
00:09:37,507 --> 00:09:38,740
Pass.
230
00:09:38,742 --> 00:09:40,842
Oh, dear sister. I
cannot go to the ball.
231
00:09:40,844 --> 00:09:42,610
I'm far too shy.
232
00:09:42,612 --> 00:09:45,246
But, sister, until you marry,
none of us can marry, either.
233
00:09:45,248 --> 00:09:47,082
I want a wedding! But
instead of a wedding cake,
234
00:09:47,084 --> 00:09:48,917
I want to get a
bunch of cupcakes
235
00:09:48,919 --> 00:09:51,953
Because it's a long time ago,
so that idea is still good!
236
00:09:51,955 --> 00:09:54,289
I am afraid I'm far too shy.
237
00:09:54,291 --> 00:09:56,424
We're all going to die
alone because of me.
238
00:09:56,426 --> 00:09:58,293
Don't be mad, though, 'kay?
239
00:09:58,295 --> 00:10:00,562
That was the night that tina
decided she had to find a match
240
00:10:00,564 --> 00:10:03,064
For gayle. It was mere days
before the rich man's ball,
241
00:10:03,066 --> 00:10:06,134
And so tina had to find gayle
a suitor and with haste.
242
00:10:06,136 --> 00:10:09,237
Tina tried every eligible
bachelor she could think of,
243
00:10:09,239 --> 00:10:11,239
But unfortunately she
could only think of one.
244
00:10:11,241 --> 00:10:13,575
Theodore the blacksmith.
Thank you.
245
00:10:13,577 --> 00:10:15,910
Whoa, what do you call this thing?
It's a cup.
246
00:10:15,912 --> 00:10:17,946
Say it again. It's amazing.
A cup.
247
00:10:17,948 --> 00:10:19,747
You've never seen a cup before?
Nope.
248
00:10:19,749 --> 00:10:22,217
I drink by sticking my
head in the river. Oh.
249
00:10:22,219 --> 00:10:23,384
And what's this? What's what?
250
00:10:23,386 --> 00:10:25,487
Uh, this thing all around us.
251
00:10:25,489 --> 00:10:27,222
A house? How are
you saying that?
252
00:10:27,224 --> 00:10:30,125
House? No, house. House. How-use.
How-use. How-use.
253
00:10:30,127 --> 00:10:32,794
House. House. House. Oh, god. How-use.
How-use. House. So quick. House.
254
00:10:32,796 --> 00:10:35,296
And what about... What about... What
about... What about... What about...
255
00:10:35,298 --> 00:10:37,665
But alas, gayle's
heart remained empty.
256
00:10:37,667 --> 00:10:40,735
Until he showed up. My horse broke
down in front of your cottage.
257
00:10:40,737 --> 00:10:44,239
May I use your old-fashioned
ink pens and paper
258
00:10:44,241 --> 00:10:47,242
To alert my family and
friends to my delay?
259
00:10:47,244 --> 00:10:50,111
Then I will send the
letters with my servant,
260
00:10:50,113 --> 00:10:52,013
And my family will
receive the letters
261
00:10:52,015 --> 00:10:55,150
Right before I get there.
It's a pretty good system.
262
00:10:55,152 --> 00:10:56,151
Of course, sir...
263
00:10:56,153 --> 00:10:57,485
Sir bob. Belcher.
264
00:10:57,487 --> 00:11:00,021
Lord and heir to the
belcher burger fortune.
265
00:11:02,526 --> 00:11:03,992
Why, you're the lord throwing
266
00:11:03,994 --> 00:11:05,693
The rich man's
ball, are you not?
267
00:11:05,695 --> 00:11:07,929
And who is this? Ah!
268
00:11:07,931 --> 00:11:10,498
Your ankles are... Great. Ah!
269
00:11:10,500 --> 00:11:12,167
Her name is gayle, and
she's not married.
270
00:11:12,169 --> 00:11:14,035
And if you like her ankles,
you should see her shins.
271
00:11:14,037 --> 00:11:15,937
Her shins go on for inches.
272
00:11:15,939 --> 00:11:18,773
You better not be marrying my
bob off to gayle, little missy.
273
00:11:18,775 --> 00:11:20,942
Ugh, just let me finish, okay?
274
00:11:20,944 --> 00:11:24,045
Well, gayle, I hope I shall
see you at mine ball.
275
00:11:24,047 --> 00:11:26,514
Oh! Ah! Ah.
276
00:11:26,516 --> 00:11:30,018
Should I, uh, pick her up?
277
00:11:30,020 --> 00:11:32,720
Nah, we usually just let her
sleep there when that happens.
278
00:11:32,722 --> 00:11:34,442
Oh. Wait. No, she's on fire.
Let's move her.
279
00:11:39,462 --> 00:11:42,397
Tina: The date of the
ball had arrived.
280
00:11:42,399 --> 00:11:44,065
Everyone from town was there.
281
00:11:44,067 --> 00:11:45,733
Wow. Everyone from town is here.
282
00:11:45,735 --> 00:11:47,835
Even lord ken the albino! Ken!
283
00:11:47,837 --> 00:11:50,238
Oh, I can't wait to see sir bob!
284
00:11:50,240 --> 00:11:52,307
Yeah. Have fun with that.
285
00:11:52,309 --> 00:11:54,342
I'm gonna go put a bunch of
crumpets down my corset.
286
00:11:54,344 --> 00:11:56,477
Gonna leave this place with
a month's worth of food.
287
00:11:56,479 --> 00:11:58,012
Hello, gayle.
288
00:11:58,014 --> 00:12:00,381
What is that lovely
sash about your waist?
289
00:12:00,383 --> 00:12:03,017
I call it a fanny pack.
290
00:12:03,019 --> 00:12:04,385
It's very fetching. Oh!
291
00:12:04,387 --> 00:12:06,254
Hi, lady tina. Hi.
292
00:12:06,256 --> 00:12:09,490
I hope you like the band
boys fore the present tyme.
293
00:12:09,492 --> 00:12:11,259
They are very popular
in the city.
294
00:12:11,261 --> 00:12:12,827
Come, let's dance.
295
00:12:12,829 --> 00:12:14,329
They're playing
the heinie liney.
296
00:12:14,331 --> 00:12:15,496
Oh!
297
00:12:15,498 --> 00:12:18,132
? ?
298
00:12:38,454 --> 00:12:41,256
Tina, seriously? Dad, please!
I'm almost done.
299
00:12:41,258 --> 00:12:44,359
Sir bob and gayle danced
together all evening.
300
00:12:44,361 --> 00:12:46,694
They couldn't take their eyes,
or butts, off of each other.
301
00:12:46,696 --> 00:12:48,363
Where's my sexy fianc�?!
302
00:12:48,365 --> 00:12:49,631
Where is he?!
303
00:12:49,633 --> 00:12:51,232
Bob!
304
00:12:51,234 --> 00:12:53,635
Uh, here I am. Uh, hi... Honey.
305
00:12:53,637 --> 00:12:55,536
I can't believe you'd
have a ball without me,
306
00:12:55,538 --> 00:12:57,038
Your loud, rude,
american wife-to-be
307
00:12:57,040 --> 00:12:58,280
That you're marrying for money!
308
00:12:59,809 --> 00:13:01,476
Come here! Give me a kiss!
309
00:13:01,478 --> 00:13:03,044
Whoa. Uh-uh.
310
00:13:03,046 --> 00:13:05,313
Aah.
311
00:13:05,315 --> 00:13:07,715
Tina: Gayle was so
heartbroken over sir bob
312
00:13:07,717 --> 00:13:09,884
That she fell deathly
ill with pooping cough.
313
00:13:09,886 --> 00:13:11,953
Her sisters tried everything
to bring her back to health.
314
00:13:11,955 --> 00:13:14,322
Leeches. Yum!
315
00:13:14,324 --> 00:13:15,556
Beaches.
316
00:13:15,558 --> 00:13:18,393
Screeches. Wake up!
Stop being sick!
317
00:13:18,395 --> 00:13:20,762
But nothing worked.
They called the vicar
318
00:13:20,764 --> 00:13:22,463
To come give her last rites.
319
00:13:22,465 --> 00:13:24,299
I'm the vicar, scott bakula.
320
00:13:24,301 --> 00:13:26,467
Well, hello! I'm feeling
much better all of a sudden.
321
00:13:26,469 --> 00:13:29,671
Oh, good. Well, let me whisper
a prayer into your mouth.
322
00:13:29,673 --> 00:13:31,172
Oh!
323
00:13:32,475 --> 00:13:34,342
Then they quantum
leapt into the future
324
00:13:34,344 --> 00:13:35,643
To the day of their
double wedding
325
00:13:35,645 --> 00:13:37,478
With tina and jimmy jr.,
326
00:13:37,480 --> 00:13:38,980
And they all lived
happily ever after. Mmm.
327
00:13:38,982 --> 00:13:40,748
And sir bob and linda
were also married,
328
00:13:40,750 --> 00:13:42,317
And then they had a
baby with a tail
329
00:13:42,319 --> 00:13:43,951
Because they were cousins.
The end.
330
00:13:43,953 --> 00:13:46,421
That was so good!
331
00:13:46,423 --> 00:13:49,757
Oh, I could feel scott bakula's
kiss whispers in my mouth!
332
00:13:49,759 --> 00:13:51,693
Kisspers! Ah, I've heard better.
333
00:13:51,695 --> 00:13:53,328
And your father and
I are not cousins.
334
00:13:53,330 --> 00:13:54,362
That we know of.
335
00:13:54,364 --> 00:13:55,963
You win, tina.
336
00:13:55,965 --> 00:13:57,432
Oh! Or should gene win?
337
00:13:57,434 --> 00:13:59,434
Oh, gosh, this is tough.
338
00:13:59,436 --> 00:14:01,936
I think you're
forgetting something.
339
00:14:01,938 --> 00:14:03,938
Oh, right. Okay, go ahead.
340
00:14:03,940 --> 00:14:06,107
I call it "gayle of thrones."
341
00:14:07,544 --> 00:14:08,943
Pace yourselves, guys.
342
00:14:08,945 --> 00:14:11,512
You're gonna want
to save your gasps.
343
00:14:11,514 --> 00:14:15,183
Behold the tale of queen
gayle of catsteros.
344
00:14:15,185 --> 00:14:17,552
She was the most powerful woman
345
00:14:17,554 --> 00:14:19,887
In all of the nine
cat-life kingdoms,
346
00:14:19,889 --> 00:14:22,523
And mistress of the
world's only cat dragons.
347
00:14:22,525 --> 00:14:27,795
People of catsteros, please
eat, drink and be meowy!
348
00:14:27,797 --> 00:14:30,231
Your royal highness... meow...
349
00:14:30,233 --> 00:14:33,534
Visitors from the kingdom
of litter boxia!
350
00:14:33,536 --> 00:14:36,137
Lady gayle, we come on
behalf of your sister,
351
00:14:36,139 --> 00:14:38,005
Lindaryen of litter boxia,
352
00:14:38,007 --> 00:14:39,974
To present you with a
gift in her absence.
353
00:14:39,976 --> 00:14:42,143
A gift? I'm surprised.
354
00:14:42,145 --> 00:14:44,512
She's always been jealous of
me because I have cat dragons,
355
00:14:44,514 --> 00:14:46,481
And I'm not a cranky old hag.
356
00:14:46,483 --> 00:14:48,416
Oh, well, she didn't
mention that.
357
00:14:48,418 --> 00:14:50,418
And now, may I
present, this guy!
358
00:14:50,420 --> 00:14:52,019
I'm gene
359
00:14:52,021 --> 00:14:53,554
From the house of the unfarting.
360
00:14:53,556 --> 00:14:55,556
My queen, I am a warlock.
361
00:14:55,558 --> 00:14:57,525
If I disappear, just
check your rear. Blee.
362
00:14:57,527 --> 00:14:59,060
But don't worry.
363
00:14:59,062 --> 00:15:00,561
I always turn up. Blee.
364
00:15:00,563 --> 00:15:02,397
Just never where you left me!
365
00:15:02,399 --> 00:15:03,598
Oh, impressive.
366
00:15:03,600 --> 00:15:05,733
He was over there... meow...
367
00:15:05,735 --> 00:15:07,935
And now he's over here. Meow.
368
00:15:07,937 --> 00:15:09,437
I'm befuddled.
369
00:15:09,439 --> 00:15:10,872
I love your cat dragons!
370
00:15:10,874 --> 00:15:13,274
I'll take them in my wagon.
Blee.
371
00:15:13,276 --> 00:15:14,942
Wha? I'm checking my rear!
372
00:15:14,944 --> 00:15:17,745
He's not there! And he
took my cat dragons!
373
00:15:17,747 --> 00:15:19,280
Blee. Here I am.
374
00:15:19,282 --> 00:15:20,581
Oh, phew. Blee.
375
00:15:20,583 --> 00:15:23,451
Just kidding. No!
376
00:15:26,955 --> 00:15:29,590
My cat dragons are gone.
I must go get them.
377
00:15:29,592 --> 00:15:31,058
They are my children.
378
00:15:31,060 --> 00:15:32,460
They've suckled at my teats!
379
00:15:32,462 --> 00:15:34,395
Ew.
380
00:15:34,397 --> 00:15:36,063
At least let our bravest
knight go with you
381
00:15:36,065 --> 00:15:37,765
To assist your grace. Meow.
382
00:15:37,767 --> 00:15:39,634
My lady gayle.
383
00:15:39,636 --> 00:15:42,069
Knight louise, this is my fight.
384
00:15:42,071 --> 00:15:43,971
I cannot risk your life.
385
00:15:43,973 --> 00:15:47,208
But I can. Plus, I really
dislike lindaryen.
386
00:15:47,210 --> 00:15:49,477
She's a tyrant who
punishes children unjustly
387
00:15:49,479 --> 00:15:51,546
For doing hilarious pranks.
388
00:15:51,548 --> 00:15:54,882
I swear my service
and my steel to you.
389
00:15:54,884 --> 00:15:57,785
The burgarean slapper!
390
00:15:57,787 --> 00:15:59,420
Let us be off.
391
00:15:59,422 --> 00:16:01,923
My cat dragons are
probably very confused
392
00:16:01,925 --> 00:16:04,559
Without me and my breast milk.
393
00:16:04,561 --> 00:16:06,260
People of catsteros,
394
00:16:06,262 --> 00:16:08,429
Remain here, remain strong.
395
00:16:08,431 --> 00:16:11,566
I will return with our dragons!
396
00:16:13,136 --> 00:16:18,639
And then I shall breast-feed
all of you! Oh.
397
00:16:18,641 --> 00:16:21,509
Louise: And so they set
off for litter boxia,
398
00:16:21,511 --> 00:16:23,911
Fighting their many
enemies along the way.
399
00:16:23,913 --> 00:16:26,481
They were held prisoner
by theus of grimward,
400
00:16:26,483 --> 00:16:29,584
Thannis of grinjammed, and
thambis of gramjimnt.
401
00:16:29,586 --> 00:16:31,652
But each time, they escaped.
402
00:16:31,654 --> 00:16:34,522
There are the gates of
litter boxia, my queen.
403
00:16:34,524 --> 00:16:36,757
Wow, it really stinks here.
404
00:16:36,759 --> 00:16:39,694
Yes, litter boxia has not
been cleaned in many moons.
405
00:16:39,696 --> 00:16:41,662
And outside of litter boxia,
406
00:16:41,664 --> 00:16:43,264
The most dreaded monsters
407
00:16:43,266 --> 00:16:45,266
In all of the nine
cat-life kingdoms.
408
00:16:45,268 --> 00:16:46,834
Hark, my lady. A sound ahead.
409
00:16:46,836 --> 00:16:49,504
What is it? It sounds
really boring.
410
00:16:49,506 --> 00:16:51,506
It's a white talker!
411
00:16:51,508 --> 00:16:53,040
Cover your ears, or they will
412
00:16:53,042 --> 00:16:55,476
Literally bore you into
a deathlike slumber.
413
00:16:55,478 --> 00:16:56,978
I tried everything
414
00:16:56,980 --> 00:16:58,613
To get that barbecue stain
out of my underpants.
415
00:16:58,615 --> 00:17:00,181
The best place to park
at the hardware store
416
00:17:00,183 --> 00:17:01,682
Is probably the parking lot.
417
00:17:01,684 --> 00:17:04,385
Oh. Oh, I have an itch. Oh.
Oh, god. Oh, it...
418
00:17:04,387 --> 00:17:07,355
Oh, it's so itchy. Oh, I got to itch it.
Don't itch it!
419
00:17:07,357 --> 00:17:09,557
Oh, I can't wait any longer!
420
00:17:09,559 --> 00:17:10,992
Do not take your
hands off your ears!
421
00:17:10,994 --> 00:17:12,693
My lady, no! Oh, I
got to itch it.
422
00:17:12,695 --> 00:17:15,530
Oh, god! Oh, oh! Ugh.
423
00:17:15,532 --> 00:17:18,699
Oh, no. He got me.
424
00:17:18,701 --> 00:17:20,134
So boring.
425
00:17:20,136 --> 00:17:22,737
I'm... So bored.
426
00:17:22,739 --> 00:17:26,140
Louise...!
427
00:17:26,142 --> 00:17:28,809
Who goes there? It is I,
428
00:17:28,811 --> 00:17:30,811
Gayle, queen of catsteros.
429
00:17:30,813 --> 00:17:32,513
I seek my sister lindaryen.
430
00:17:32,515 --> 00:17:34,982
She has stolen my dragons.
431
00:17:34,984 --> 00:17:36,584
Oh. Okay.
432
00:17:36,586 --> 00:17:37,985
So you're gayle. Okay.
433
00:17:37,987 --> 00:17:40,588
Just go in or whatever. Hi.
434
00:17:42,391 --> 00:17:44,191
Everyone, listen to me sing!
435
00:17:44,193 --> 00:17:46,394
? La, la, la, la-la-la-la-la. ?
436
00:17:46,396 --> 00:17:48,896
Bobdor. Gayle!
437
00:17:48,898 --> 00:17:51,532
Sister. Surprised to see me?
438
00:17:51,534 --> 00:17:53,601
Not at all! I knew you'd come,
439
00:17:53,603 --> 00:17:57,338
And I knew when you did I'd get
rid of you once and for all!
440
00:17:57,340 --> 00:17:59,707
I challenge you... To a duel.
441
00:17:59,709 --> 00:18:01,442
To the death?
442
00:18:01,444 --> 00:18:02,610
Yes! But let's do that thing
443
00:18:02,612 --> 00:18:04,345
Where we pick someone
to represent us
444
00:18:04,347 --> 00:18:06,581
And fight in our honor, and
then die in our place, right?
445
00:18:06,583 --> 00:18:07,548
Oh, good idea.
446
00:18:07,550 --> 00:18:09,617
I choose the mort-tain!
447
00:18:09,619 --> 00:18:12,219
Mm, uh. Huh? Oh, okay.
448
00:18:12,221 --> 00:18:13,621
Um, hang on.
449
00:18:13,623 --> 00:18:16,390
Sorry to do this,
louise, but I need you.
450
00:18:16,392 --> 00:18:18,793
Aah. What-what's going on?
451
00:18:18,795 --> 00:18:20,728
I need you to fight for me
in a duel to the death.
452
00:18:20,730 --> 00:18:22,763
Oh! Good. Linda: Enough talk!
453
00:18:22,765 --> 00:18:24,599
Let the duel commence!
454
00:18:24,601 --> 00:18:27,768
But let's make this fight a
little more interesting.
455
00:18:27,770 --> 00:18:29,770
Be careful not to fall
456
00:18:29,772 --> 00:18:32,740
Into my pit of ravenous
porcelain babies.
457
00:18:32,742 --> 00:18:36,243
They haven't been fed in days.
458
00:18:36,245 --> 00:18:38,479
So hungry.
459
00:18:39,816 --> 00:18:41,382
Thanks for playing, big guy.
460
00:18:41,384 --> 00:18:42,817
Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
461
00:18:42,819 --> 00:18:44,986
Oh, crap. Shouldn't
have done that.
462
00:18:44,988 --> 00:18:47,588
Well, you beat me
fair and square,
463
00:18:47,590 --> 00:18:49,156
But I'm gonna kill you anyway.
464
00:18:49,158 --> 00:18:50,825
Bobdor, throw 'em into the pit.
465
00:18:50,827 --> 00:18:52,093
Bobdor.
466
00:18:52,095 --> 00:18:53,828
Does that mean yes or no?
467
00:18:53,830 --> 00:18:55,730
'cause it's the only thing
you ever say. Bobdor.
468
00:18:55,732 --> 00:18:57,064
Yeah, that doesn't help.
469
00:18:57,066 --> 00:18:59,433
I got to get a new fool.
Maybe somebody thinner.
470
00:18:59,435 --> 00:19:02,103
I want somebody hot.
471
00:19:02,105 --> 00:19:03,671
What-what are you doing?
472
00:19:03,673 --> 00:19:06,173
Aah! Ow! Oh! My
babies are eating me!
473
00:19:06,175 --> 00:19:07,642
Oh, bad babies! Down!
474
00:19:07,644 --> 00:19:09,644
Thank you, bobdor.
475
00:19:09,646 --> 00:19:13,314
I'll breast-feed you first
when we get back to catsteros.
476
00:19:13,316 --> 00:19:16,651
All right, everybody,
let's go home.
477
00:19:16,653 --> 00:19:19,820
Scott bakula?! Where
did you come from?
478
00:19:19,822 --> 00:19:21,489
Does it really matter?
479
00:19:21,491 --> 00:19:23,658
Bobdor third wheel. Bye-bye.
480
00:19:23,660 --> 00:19:26,193
Bobdor!
481
00:19:26,195 --> 00:19:27,828
The end.
482
00:19:27,830 --> 00:19:30,531
Louise, you haven't watched
game of thrones, right?
483
00:19:30,533 --> 00:19:31,999
No. Game of what?
484
00:19:32,001 --> 00:19:33,768
I don't know what
you're talking about.
485
00:19:33,770 --> 00:19:36,637
Oh, louise, that was so good.
Yup.
486
00:19:36,639 --> 00:19:40,107
You're just all such wonderful
nieces and nephews.
487
00:19:40,109 --> 00:19:42,710
I don't need stacy.
488
00:19:42,712 --> 00:19:44,812
You've shown me
that I'm talented
489
00:19:44,814 --> 00:19:47,048
And lovable and strong...
490
00:19:47,050 --> 00:19:48,516
hey, gayle.
491
00:19:48,518 --> 00:19:50,885
Still up for that date?
My emergency canceled.
492
00:19:50,887 --> 00:19:53,287
Stacy! How'd you find me?
493
00:19:53,289 --> 00:19:55,790
All those messages you left
me at work and at home
494
00:19:55,792 --> 00:19:57,892
And at my mother's telling
me where you were going.
495
00:19:57,894 --> 00:19:59,060
Oh. Oh, yeah.
496
00:19:59,062 --> 00:20:00,728
Okay, let's get out of here!
497
00:20:00,730 --> 00:20:01,862
Bye, kids.
498
00:20:01,864 --> 00:20:03,130
No! No!
499
00:20:03,132 --> 00:20:04,665
Son of a bitch!
500
00:20:04,667 --> 00:20:06,133
Mom, come on. Are we
really still grounded?
501
00:20:06,135 --> 00:20:07,902
We were just trying to be funny.
502
00:20:07,904 --> 00:20:09,370
Yeah. We tried to
make you laugh,
503
00:20:09,372 --> 00:20:10,705
But instead, you made
the world laugh.
504
00:20:10,707 --> 00:20:12,973
Uh-huh. It did sound
kind of funny.
505
00:20:14,376 --> 00:20:16,877
Hey, uh, mom, uh, can
we get some ice cream?
506
00:20:16,879 --> 00:20:18,846
Yeah. From that case right there.
Yeah!
507
00:20:18,848 --> 00:20:20,481
Ice cream. Yummy.
Good idea, girls.
508
00:20:20,483 --> 00:20:22,717
Freezer frankenstein!
509
00:20:22,719 --> 00:20:25,386
Oh. Uh. Whoo. Oh. Whoa.
510
00:20:29,257 --> 00:20:31,892
Lin, you fell into a pile of
maxi pads, and you farted.
511
00:20:31,894 --> 00:20:33,561
It's pretty funny.
512
00:20:33,563 --> 00:20:35,062
It wasn't funny!
Everyone laughed at me.
513
00:20:35,064 --> 00:20:36,697
Yeah. Yup. Yup.
514
00:20:36,699 --> 00:20:38,566
And then I had to buy
all those maxi pads.
515
00:20:38,568 --> 00:20:40,935
Oh, it's gonna take me weeks
to get through those!
516
00:20:40,937 --> 00:20:43,738
And then I farted again when
they handed me my bags.
517
00:20:43,740 --> 00:20:45,072
Mom, it was perfect.
Don't you see?
518
00:20:45,074 --> 00:20:46,774
I'm proud of you!
519
00:20:46,776 --> 00:20:48,743
You farted your way
into our hearts, mom.
520
00:20:48,745 --> 00:20:49,910
Okay. It was... It was funny.
521
00:20:49,912 --> 00:20:52,279
It was funny.
522
00:20:52,281 --> 00:20:53,948
So, we aren't grounded anymore?
523
00:20:53,950 --> 00:20:55,182
Tell you what. You're
grounded for tonight,
524
00:20:55,184 --> 00:20:57,118
And you all have to
watch tv with me.
525
00:20:57,120 --> 00:20:58,552
All right, it's something.
526
00:20:58,554 --> 00:21:00,020
And we're gonna watch
whatever I want,
527
00:21:00,022 --> 00:21:01,789
And we're gonna be a
big snuggle sandwich.
528
00:21:01,791 --> 00:21:04,959
I'm the cheese, right in the
middle, and everyone likes me!
529
00:21:04,961 --> 00:21:06,427
Wait, where are you going?
We're not closed.
530
00:21:06,429 --> 00:21:07,795
We-we don't close for hours.
Bye, dad!
531
00:21:07,797 --> 00:21:09,797
Wai-wai-wai-wait.
Don't close the d...
532
00:21:09,799 --> 00:21:12,533
They closed the door. I
should have gone with gayle.
533
00:21:12,583 --> 00:21:17,133
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