All language subtitles for The.Secret.of.My.Success.1987.DVDRip.XviD-NoGrp.ENG1

New York City.

He wants to see
what's there.

I can tell him
what's there.

I don't know how,
when you've never been.

Well, Toto, I guess
we're not in Kansas any more.

I can't figure out why he'd want to go
to New York when we got everything here.

Somethin' I have to do, Dad.

Did you pack an iron
like I told you to?

Mom.

You're gonna walk around
wrinkled in New York if you don't.

Elmer Whitfield's cousin Carlton
went off to New York a normal boy.

Came back with his head shaved
and an earring stuck in his cheek.

Mom, there's
a whole world out there.

I mean big, exciting.

I got a nice,
small apartment lined up.

I got a great job.

I wanna make
lots of money.

I want to have a meaningful experience
with an incredibly beautiful woman.

I can't even take a woman like that
to a small apartment.

- I gotta get a penthouse.
- A penthouse?

With a Jacuzzi in it.

Doin' this for you
as much as for me, Mom.

All those years of college--
They're gonna start payin' off.

Back!

All right, listen up.

If there are any bugs in here or rats or
anything that has more legs than I do...

you just stay on your side
of the room, okay?

I'll stay on mine.

I should warn you.
I'm packing an iron.

You weren't listening.

Darling, please pack it
as fast as you can.

- Mr Forbush?
- Not me! He's two doors down the hall.

lnto the shredder
as fast as possible.

- Mr Forbush.
- Yep.

Hi, I'm Brantley Foster
from Kansas.

- You hired me. I start work here today.
- You're fired, kid. Sorry.

We all saw it coming, but we
looked for some kind of miracle.

Miracle never happened.

- What did happen?
- Hostile takeover.

Ninety percent of the people
in this building are out on the street.

You are one of those 90%.
Tough break.

Mr Forbush, I was counting on this job.
What do I do now?

Punt!

Okay, New York...

if this is the way
you want it, okay.

- I'm sorry, Mister--
- Foster.

I'm sorry, Mr Foster.
We need someone with experience.

But how can I get experience until
I get a job that gives me experience?

If we gave you a job
just to give you experience...

you'd take that experience
and get a better job.

Then that experience
would benefit someone else.

But I was trained in college
to handle a job like this.

So in a sense,
I already have experience.

What you've got is
college experience...

not the practical, hard-nosed business
experience we're looking for.

If you'd joined our training program out
of high school, you'd be qualified now.

Then why did I go to college?

Had fun, didn't you?

What impresses me most...

is the amount of experience you picked
up while still attending college.

Well, ma'am, I knew all
those years of college...

would be worthless without practical,
hard-nosed business experience.

"Assistant personnel manager,
J. Hall Communications.

Junior purchasing agent,
Midland Furniture.

Vice President in Charge of
Production, Central Manufacturing."

Outstanding.

You're not gonna tell me I have
too much experience, are you?

Certainly not.
You're perfect for the job.

- Great!
- Except--

No. No exceptions.

I want this job.
I need it. I can do it.

Everywhere I've been today
there's been something wrong.

Too young, too old,
too short, too tall.

Whatever the exception is,
I can fix it.

I can be older. I can be taller.
I can be anything.

Can you be
a minority woman?

- Mom, I'm doin' great.
- Is it dirty? Are the people rude?

No, this town is terrific.
The people are really nice.

- That's good. What about your job?
-Job? Hey!

I got a fantastic office,
got a gorgeous secretary. The works.

We don't care if she's gorgeous.
Is she any good?

- What?
- You heard me. Can she type?

Ma, of course she can type.

Some can't, you know. Is it safe there?
You haven't been robbed?

Ma, will you quit worryin'?
There is no danger.

- But New York is--
- New York is like Kansas intensified.

- What?
- What's that? Something the matter?

No, Mom.
That's just the TV.

- It sounds so real.
- It's Miami Vice.

Can you turn the sound down?
It's too loud.

Ma, it's broken.
The knob came off in my hand.

Goodness. Well, what about
Uncle Howard? Did you call him?

Uncle Howard!
Yeah, the phone number.

Well, you still have
the number, don't you?

Oh, yeah.
I got it right here.

Are you all right?
You seem distracted.

They just totalled a Ferrari.

But Uncle Howard--
did you call him?

No, I haven't had a chance
to call Uncle Howard yet.

Will you try to see him?

I'll probably bump into him
at the country club.

Get the TV fixed, dear.

Yeah.

- Listen, I gotta go. Okay?
- Okay.

- Give Dad my love.
- I will, dear. I love you, Brantley.

- I love you too, Mom. Bye-bye.
- Bye!

Well, at least let me
buy you an airline ticket.

Dad, I'm gonna do this
on my own.

But you did make it
a round-trip ticket?

Yeah. I'm not
gonna need it.

No, when I come back to Kansas,
I'm comin' back in my own jet.

Take this. It's Uncle Howard's
phone number in New York.

I got an uncle
in New York?

My cousin Ellen married
his half sister's nephew...

before she got bit
by that dog and died.

But he's still kin,
and kin is kin.

Hi.

I'd like to see
Mr Prescott, please.

Do you have
an appointment?

I tried to get one, but I couldn't,
so I just thought I'd surprise him.

Mr Prescott
doesn't like surprises.

- Everybody likes surprises.
- Not Mr Prescott.

- You can leave your name.
- Brantley Foster.

- Of?
- Of Kansas.

Of what company?

What do you wanna see
Mr Prescott about?

About being his nephew.

Well, why don't you
have a seat?

I'll see if I can work you
into Mr Prescott's schedule.

Thank you.

Give Uncle Howard my card.

Are you really
Mr Prescott's nephew?

In a roundabout
sort of way.

You sons of bitches don't
have a half a brain between you!

I'm looking at
a $300 million deficit here...

because you idiots didn't anticipate
the needs of a changing market!

- Uncle Howard?
- Now, get out, all of you!

And bring me back some
new ideas that'll work!

Or I'll have your heads
mounted on my wall!

- Geez, he's gonna burst a blood vessel.
- Yeah, wishful thinking.

I'll see if I can
get you in now.

Thank you.

You know, it can't be good
for his heart to shout that way.

He doesn't have a heart.

- What, Maureen, what?
- Brantley Foster is here to see you.

I don't know any Brantley Foster.

- Your nephew from Kansas.
- Who?

- He says he's your nephew from Kansas.
- Kansas?

Mr Prescott
will see you now.

Clever.

So you're one
of the Kansas Fosters, huh?

Shirttail relative,
to say the least.

Listen...

I know you probably told your secretary
to get me outta here in five minutes.

- Two.
- Right.

So I'll get
right to the point.

- I need a job, Uncle Howard.
- Around here, I'm Mr Prescott.

Do you have any idea
what we do here?

Yes, sir.

Pemrose is a multinational conglomerate
with 27 different divisions.

Products ranging from dog food
to guided missile systems.

There are 30,000 people
working in this building alone.

Their accumulated salary is higher
than the gross national product...

of half the nations
in the Common Market.

Last year we borrowed more money
from banks than Mexico did.

It's a great company, Uncle--

Mr Prescott. That's why I'm here.

What can you do for us, Brantley?
What experience have you had?

Practically none.

But I believe in myself.

Doesn't that count? Deep inside, I know
I can do anything if I get a chance.

Think back to when
you were my age.

Remember how you felt when
you went after that first job.

Remember how
you wanted it so badly...

you couldn't sleep
the night before the interview.

Remember how crushed you were
when the guy said...

"What kind
of experience have you got?"

You wanted to shake
your fists and say...

"I can do anything
if I can just get a chance."

They're ready for you
in the boardroom, Mr Prescott.

Call Bates in Personnel.
Tell him I'm sending somebody up.

Well, you're
in the front door, kid.

What you do on this side of it
is up to you.

Congratulations. He really
must have taken a shine to you.

Thanks. He's a warm guy.

May I?

You can't come in here, bozo.
Take your crap to the mail slot.

I work here.Just started.

What do you want, an engraved
invitation? Come on. Come on.

Brantley, eh?
Somebody gave you that name?

Jesus, a college puke!
This really makes my day.

- Well, you're welcome.
- Melrose, get over here!

Listen to what he says,
then do what he does.

Stay out of my way. Don't use
the stamp machine for personal letters.

Take off that stupid-looking tie.
Looks like you shot your couch.

- You got any questions?
- Yeah. What do I call you?

- Call me God.
- Got a problem, Boss? I'm your man.

Show the college puke the ropes
and keep him outta my face.

His name is Brantley.

All right, kid.
Follow me.

All right, you stick with me
and everything's gonna be copacetic.

Twice a day you deliver. Like a mailman,
you pick up whatever's goin'out.

I can do it in 30 minutes.
Rattigan thinks it takes me two hours.

What's this department?
What do they do here?

Who knows? This place is a zoo.
Nobody knows what anybody else is doin'.

Can you get promoted
out of the mailroom?

You can't even get paroled
out of the mailroom. Excuse me, dear.

Good morning.

- Nix.
- What?

- Good morning.
- Look, not the suits.

- What do you mean?
- Excuse me, sir.

- Good morning.
- Look, not the suits, man.

You never consort with the suits,
unless they consort with you first.

That's ridiculous. He's a person.
I'm a person. I can't say hello?

He's not a person.
He's a suit.

You're mailroom.
No consorting. Come on.

We're entering
a sensitive zone.

This guy in that office
just got canned.

Mailroom knew about it on Friday.
He just found out today.

No kidding.
Is his job still open?

No, man, an economic cutback.
His job was dissolved.

About two dozen suits
got the ax.

Will you quit trying to consort?
Come on.

All right,
the yellow ones go to Purchasing.

All the white ones are a bunch
of suits talkin'to themselves.

You're supposed
to deliver 'em, not read 'em.

Some of this stuff
doesn't make any sense.

They send requisitions
through two departments...

to get procurements
for a third.

- What kind of thinking is that?
- That's suit thinking.

Something happens to a man
when he puts on a necktie.

Cuts off all the oxygen
to his brain.

You crazy? You're not supposed to
take the memos out of the mailroom.

I can't follow a chain of command
in this company.

They got the right title, but their job
assignments and objectives are screwed--

- Look at this.Jesus. Purchasing.
- What?

It's a joke. They've got two people
doin' basically the same job.

Neither one of them
is doin' it right.

I'll bring it up
at the next stockholders meeting.

- Would you put these things away?
- Whoa, Melrose.

How ya doin'? We've been gettin'
a lot of requests in the mailroom...

for stockholder information,
company assets, expenditures.

- Anything you can give us.
- You're kidding?

Any of this research you want,
you can have.

- Take it all.
- Thanks very much.

She's the most incredible-looking woman
I've ever seen in my life.

She's a Rolls-Royce,
but she's also a suit.

What's she like?
What do you know about her?

I know enough never
to consort with the suits, pal.

- Even when they do have legs like hers.
- Come on. You know more than that.

Her name is Christy Wills.

She's supposed to be some
sort of financial wizard, you know?

Harvard. All that crap.

And forget it.

No.
That's Transportation's problem.

No, we do not supply drivers
for executives' wives.

We are a messenger service.

I don't care
if the other drivers are all busy.

Yeah, well, the same
to you, sweetheart.

Hey, Dartmouth,
get over here.

Executive's wife wants
a ride up to Litchfield.

- Check out a car and drive her.
- Where's Litchfield?

You'll find it.
Just follow the smell of money.

Excuse me, ma'am.
I'm not quite sure which way--

Turn the key, start the car,
put it in drive and step on the gas.

Any idiot can do that,
even my husband.

Excuse me, ma'am.

- I know I'm not supposed to consort--
- Then don't.

You seem kind of upset. I was wonderin'
if there was anything I could do.

I don't know.
My cook quit this morning.

My analyst is away on vacation.
My Mercedes broke down.

I split my nail, and my husband
is screwing somebody at the office.

What did you have in mind?

Stick of gum?

This is the third weekend he's found
an excuse not to come to the country.

No, I don't know. But knowing him,
it's probably some teenage airhead...

from the steno pool.

The last one I caught him with
was so dumb...

she thought dictation
was some kind of S and M trip.

Do you know my husband?

I'm sorry. I can't hear you.

Never mind.

- Didn't hear a thing.
- I'm gonna have to call you back.

I'm so mad, I could spit.

He looks twice as good today
as the day we were married.

I just look twice as old.

Are you kiddin'?

I hope that when I'm his age,
I can wake up every morning...

and find a woman as beautiful
as you are lying next to me.

Thank you.

Turn in here.

Please.

- Bring those inside. Charles.
- May I help you with those, sir?

What are you drinking?

I can't really.
I have to get back.

God, I hate the country.

Yeah, I can see
how you'd be real miserable here.

Who can live
with so many trees?

They suck up
all the oxygen.

No, actually,
trees produce oxygen.

Who are you? Mr Wizard?

What did you say your name was?

- Brantley.
- No, I mean your first name.

That's it: Brantley.

Well, Brantley, I don't know what
you want out of Pemrose Corporation...

but I'll tell you
what you do not want.

You don't ever, ever
wanna become a corporate wife.

I'll watch my step.

Have another.

Thanks.

I've run 8,000 miles
on that tennis court...

chasing a fuzzy, little yellow ball
with an oversized racket.

Do my legs
look heavy to you?

No.

I've swum laps from here
to the moon in that pool.

Do you see anything
in this body that isn't firm?

Tennis, swimming,
aerobics, jogging, massage--

Anything and everything
to stay in shape.

Not that he'd ever notice.

So, Brantley, do you know
why I stay in shape?

- How 'bout a dip in the pool?
- No, wait!

Are you serious? Listen--

I have to get back. This is a
tempting diversion, but I got a job.

- I don't know if this is a good idea.
- Transportation, please.

Yes. The young man from
the mailroom who drove me home?

He's going to stay here
and do a little work in my garden.

See that he gets full credit
on his time card.

Thank you.

Help me out of this, will you, dear?

- That was great.
- Thanks. I swim five miles a day.

- Supposed to tone my ass.
- Yeah, it works.

Just when I thought it was safe
to go back in the water.

- You sure this is a good idea?
- It's okay. I know the owner.

Last one out of the--

- Sure your husband's not coming home?
- Who knows?

He could be home any minute...

or several hours from now.

Oh, my God.

I'm gonna see that
my husband gives you a leg up.

I think we've done pretty well
so far by ourselves.

I mean Pemrose.

No.

No, thanks.

No, I'm gonna make it
to the top by myself.

God, you're adorable.

I could spend a week
inside those sweet, unwrinkled eyes.

- Can I make a personal observation?
- Anything but the thighs.

Somebody sold you a bill of goods and
convinced you you had to be 21 forever.

That's bullshit!
I think you're terrific.

The only thing wrong with you
is your husband is a jerk.

You're beautiful.
You're intelligent.

You're sensuous.

Say that again!

- Which part?
- All of it!

Oh, no!

- What? What is it?
- It's the jerk.

My husband.

- My uncle.
- Your what?

- Oh, God! That makes you--
- Auntie Vera?

What's my mother gonna say?

- I've disgraced my whole family.
- The hell you did!

Not funny! Okay?
This is not a funny moment in my life.

Relax.
Who's gonna find out?

I'm home!

He's gonna find out.
That's who's gonna find out.

Don't worry!
He won't fire you.

There's no way I'm gonna
get a raise out of this.

Vera, what's the company car
doing in the driveway?

It broke down, darling. The driver
had to take the train back to town.

No, he didn't, darling. He's in here
having trouble with his fly.

- Get back! Do you ever stop?
- No!

How am I gonna get home?

Maybe we'll just have to keep you here
and adopt you.

You're a riot, Vera.

Please, Lord,
get me out of this.

I'll go all over the world telling
people not to screw the boss's wife.

- What are you doing in here?
- Feeling romantic.

What's for dinner?

Oh, Howard! You really know how
to sweep a girl back onto her feet.

Go back!

Sit! Sit down!

You look like death on a cracker, man.
What happened to you?

I was chased by a 200-pound dog
with a mouth as big as my head.

And that was the best thing
that happened last night.

- What was the worst thing?
- I got laid.

I'm not sure you got
your priorities straight.

Hold the elevator.
Good morning.

Hi.

We're entering a sensitive zone.

The guy in that office
just got canned.

The mailroom knew about it on Friday.
He just found out today.

I'm gonna see
that my husband gives you a leg up.

No, thanks.

No.

No, I'm gonna make it
to the top on my own.

- Hello.
- Tucker, where the hell have you been?

We got a problem
in Midwest Distribution.

What are you gonna do about it?

What's the problem?

Our stock is down
another quarter point this morning.

Whose fault is that,
Thomas?

Nobody's fault, sir.
It's a momentary lapse in the market.

- Whose fault is it, Thomas?
- It's Davis's fault, sir.

His department hasn't been
pulling its weight.

- What do you have to say for yourself?
- I've been having troubles at home.

My wife ran over
the children's dog with her car...

then we had to buy
a new dog.

Then the new dog chewed up this
entire report that I'd been working on.

Are you suggesting
that your dog ate your homework?

In a way, yes, sir.

This is not grade school, Davis!
Run at the back of the line.

- Consider yourself on warning.
- Yes, sir.

Everybody, check your pulse. Make sure
you're exercising at the optimum level.

I'm a bit above my level.
I better stop running now, maybe.

- I'm above too.
- I really don't care. Everybody, run!

I can't get anybody's approval
for the extra two trucks!

Tucker, what're you
gonna do about it?

All right, look.
What does a boxcar cost?

The transfer sheet
shows that somebody...

is accumulating
an enormous block of our stock.

- What do you think about that, Thomas?
- I think it's very encouraging.

- You do, do you?
- Yes, sir.

When a stock takes a dive
and somebody buys a ton of it--

It means that stock is
on its way to a quick rebound.

It means that the company
is ripe for a hostile takeover!

- That's what I meant!
- A hostile takeover, sir?

Yes. I'm afraid that's
what we're looking at.

I want each of you
to examine your department...

and see where you can cut costs.

Cut! Cut them to the core!

We need to raise capital quickly
so we can boost stock support.

Boost it!
Boost it to the moon!

You gonna put that
in writin'?

Yeah.

You tell the trucking company
that we have to service our customers.

If they're not gonna help us,
we're gonna find somebody who will.

Well, all right!

That's what we need, some gutsy
decisions! I'll get back to you.

Okay. Bye.

Yes!

I have got to get that report
by the end of the day, Art...

or you're in the doghouse!

I don't know.
Mr Prescott?

I'm sorry this came in so late,
but it just arrived.

It's about time!

- This isn't the men's room.
- No.

They took the urinals out last week.
I didn't like them.

How about a paper cup?

What?

Sorry. I'm just about the only
woman executive at Pemrose.

Some days, I have a chip
about the men's room.

Sorry.

Hey, nice office.

Nice furniture.
It goes with your hair.

Thank you. I like your suit.
It goes nicely with your nose.

Well.

This conversation
isn't going very well.

Thank you. There's enough talk
in the world already. Good morning.

That meant "good-bye."

I have work.

Sorry.
I have a lot of work myself.

Good morning.

I really swept her
off her feet.

All right, Foster.
Let's do it!

Hello. This is
Carlton Whitfield, 4319.

That's right. I'm still waiting for
that secretary I requested last week.

I realize you're
busy down there...

but I'm typing my own letters
and answering my own calls...

and it's getting
to be a pain.

Empty?

Well, I've been here a week,
got my name on the door...

got a desk full of supplies and
a geranium on my window ledge.

What I don't have
is a secretary.

Okay, I'll tell you what.

I'll have Personnel send a boy up from
the mailroom with the requisitions.

Just send me my secretary, okay?
Thank you very much.

Got a memo here. Big cheese in 4319
wants his new secretary pronto.

I got a memo here that's
burning up my fingers.

New suit in 4319 wants his personalized
memos and stationery immediately.

- This guy is hot.
- Who?

I don't know.
Name's on the memo.

He wants nameplates for his door,
and he wants it by noon. Okay?

Smile.

- You're late.
- I already done my rounds.

You didn't punch in.

Well, I couldn't wait to get to it.
Boy, I love my work.

Punch in, then run this up to Personnel
and wait for an answer.

Right.

I'm Jean,
your secretary.

I'm not wearing anything.

I see that.

It was warm.

Seems cooler now.
I'll get dressed.

Yes, sir.
I'll move my stuff in.

Great,Jean.
Good idea.

Jean? I have
some notes here.

I also have some charts,
some graphs, some tapes.

They're all sorted by department.
Can you read my handwriting?

- Sort of.
- Do your best.

I need some poster boards,
coloured pencils, coloured push pins...

T square, drawing table, lots of
pencils, and my lunch. Chinese?

- Hey, 4319?
- Yeah.

Great.

- Morning.
- Morning.

- Morning.
- Hi.

Hello again.
Small world.

Hello.

Are you standing still
for some purpose?

Hey, I'm just soaking up
the atmosphere.

Executive lounge, huh?

- Care to do a little lounging?
- No, I'm busy.

Ron, did you get those figures
on transfer costs and insurance?

Not yet.
Big delay in Chicago.

- Damn! I really need them!
- Blame Chicago.

- Maybe I can help.
- I'm sorry?

Transfer costs
and insurance for what?

By the time I explained,
I could find out myself.

Ron. Big weenie.

Hey, listen. Why don't you
explain it to me over lunch?

- I'll have the answer by dessert.
- I don't eat lunch.

Why don't we start this again?
Carlton Whitfield. And you're?

Annoyed. Shit.

You know, I'm just
trying to be friendly.

You picked a bad time. I was counting
on those figures from Ron.

- Christy Wills. How do you do?
- Good.

Terrible news.
Just awful!

Conference room, everybody.
Come on. On the double.

-You don't eat lunch. Do you eat dinner?
-Occasionally.

- Tonight?
- Booked.

- Tomorrow night?
- Booked.

All right, but don't beg, okay?
It's embarrassing.

Who are you?

Carlton Whitfield.
New employee.

I didn't get a memo
on that.

You will.

All right.
As long as I get the memo.

The absolute worst has happened.
We are the target of a corporate raid.

Donald Davenport has filed a 13-D.

A 13-D?

He's acquired five percent
of the stock...

and this is definitely the beginning of
a hostile takeover of our corporation.

I think we all know what happened the
last time Davenport took over a company.

Everyone was canned!

Mr Prescott has sent down word
of what he wants us to do.

We are to recommend cuts
in every department.

Our job is to slash the red ink
in every nook and cranny...

because our company needs
the cash for its defence.

Anybody wanna fire
the first shot?

Kill Toledo.

If we close down
our distribution centres...

in Toledo,Joplin,Jacksonville...

we'll slash the red ink
completely off the books.

Whitfield, you don't have
to raise your hand.Just speak.

Thank you.

Well, I know I'm new here
and everything.

On the surface, these cuts
seem like a good idea--

"Seem like a good idea"?

But closing down those distribution
centres would be a big mistake.

It so happens that those closings
are exactly what Mr Prescott wants.

Well, then Mr Prescott hasn't
thought things through very well.

I'm going to tell him you said that.

Good. Closing down
those centres...

will put a strain on
this company's cash position.

In the long run, those cuts are going
to hurt this company's innate value.

Innate value?
What is he talking about?

Davidson here will back me up
on this. Davidson?

I'm Proctor. He's Davidson.

Well, damn it,
Davidson, tell him!

You wrote a memo to Mr Thomas
explaining what I'm talking about.

Well, how did you know
I wrote that memo?

How did I know
you wrote that memo?

Who else could write
that memo, Davidson?

That memo was famous.

That memo was a masterpiece.

Clear, concise, to the point.
That was the best damn memo I ever read!

In fact, that memo wasn't even a memo.
That memo was literature.

- Well, thank you.
- You're welcome.

If you have finished your book report,
could you explain what your point is?

- The point is, we gotta be bold.
- That's my point.

We gotta build. We gotta expand.

Expanding is the only way
to help the situation.

We gotta make
this company so damn strong...

Davenport won't be able to find anyone
willing to give up Pemrose stock.

It'll be too damn valuable.
Then we'll buy his ass out!

- How old are you, Mister--
- Whitfield.

- Yes.
- Twenty-four.

I think you should keep quiet
until you're at least 25.

If I may, I don't think Whitfield's age
should be an issue here.

No one is interested
in your opinion, Davis.

We gotta block
that takeover.

I'm too old to look
for another job.

Nobody in their right mind
would hire me.

This meeting is going nowhere!

Mr Prescott's
command stands!

We are to find those cuts!

Meeting adjourned.

You'll pick up the coats.
That looks like one only a lot smaller.

Hey! Harvard!
Where the helI've you been?

Personnel. You said to wait for
an answer. They are real slow up there.