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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,390 --> 00:00:03,390 Previously... 2 00:00:03,415 --> 00:00:08,017 This is the house of a Silver Washington distributor. 3 00:00:08,042 --> 00:00:09,045 [KRYSTAL] Hmm. 4 00:00:09,070 --> 00:00:11,515 - Splashercize is a hit. - Mm-hmm. 5 00:00:13,460 --> 00:00:14,779 Y'all just stay put. 6 00:00:14,804 --> 00:00:16,092 It's a recruiting tool. 7 00:00:16,093 --> 00:00:18,209 You can tell him I'm improving the Garbeau System. 8 00:00:18,234 --> 00:00:20,789 I need to speak to Obie Garbeau ASA-fucking-P. 9 00:00:20,814 --> 00:00:22,736 'Cause if you were a Washington, you would be invited 10 00:00:22,760 --> 00:00:25,298 to his retreat next week at Paradise Cay. 11 00:00:26,087 --> 00:00:27,902 How do I become a Washington? 12 00:00:29,321 --> 00:00:30,812 I know what you're up to. 13 00:00:30,837 --> 00:00:32,524 What you're doing is dangerous. 14 00:00:32,926 --> 00:00:34,790 [CODY] You tapped a whole new market. 15 00:00:34,815 --> 00:00:38,585 - [SPEAKING SPANISH] - And I'm going to Paradise Cay. 16 00:00:38,610 --> 00:00:40,524 We went Washington. 17 00:00:44,176 --> 00:00:46,556 And we're gonna get a one-on-one with Obie. 18 00:00:48,051 --> 00:00:50,532 And we're gonna get what we want. 19 00:00:59,426 --> 00:01:00,759 [DRAMATIC MUSIC] 20 00:01:00,760 --> 00:01:02,217 ♪♪ 21 00:01:02,218 --> 00:01:03,801 Oftentimes at night, 22 00:01:03,802 --> 00:01:05,978 I dream about America. 23 00:01:06,305 --> 00:01:09,068 I dream about a land so rich in opportunity 24 00:01:09,093 --> 00:01:11,429 that it geysers up from the ground like oil, 25 00:01:11,454 --> 00:01:13,462 bursting to touch the heavens. 26 00:01:13,970 --> 00:01:15,943 [BIRD SCREECHES] 27 00:01:15,968 --> 00:01:19,532 I dream of a simpler time... 28 00:01:21,095 --> 00:01:22,769 ... when Injuns roamed, 29 00:01:23,196 --> 00:01:25,712 and Buffalo Bill and Annie Oakley were out there 30 00:01:25,737 --> 00:01:27,485 keeping the West good and wild. 31 00:01:27,510 --> 00:01:29,234 [GASPING] 32 00:01:29,259 --> 00:01:32,939 And thanks to the Garbeau System, when I wake up in whatever home 33 00:01:32,964 --> 00:01:36,946 of mine I've laid my head down in, it's like I'm still dreaming. 34 00:01:36,971 --> 00:01:38,884 [OPTIMISTIC MUSIC] 35 00:01:38,909 --> 00:01:41,927 [THUMPING] 36 00:01:43,259 --> 00:01:46,300 [PHONE DINGING] 37 00:01:49,455 --> 00:01:51,579 - [SHUSHING] - Maybe you dream of luxury. 38 00:01:51,604 --> 00:01:54,801 Caviar for breakfast, Kobe beef for lunch. 39 00:01:54,964 --> 00:01:59,068 Speeding down the highway in that Italian car with that Italian gal. 40 00:01:59,093 --> 00:02:03,151 Owning your life so your life doesn't own you. 41 00:02:05,093 --> 00:02:08,792 - ♪♪ - [DIALOGUE INAUDIBLE] 42 00:02:12,176 --> 00:02:14,258 I'm so glad you're taking a vacation. 43 00:02:14,550 --> 00:02:16,892 Paradise Cay is not a vacation. 44 00:02:16,917 --> 00:02:19,612 I'm only going so I can get my Splashercize class back. 45 00:02:19,637 --> 00:02:21,318 Well, it sounds tropical. 46 00:02:21,343 --> 00:02:23,526 - [DESTINEE COOS] - [BETS SIGHS] 47 00:02:23,551 --> 00:02:24,926 Oh... 48 00:02:25,463 --> 00:02:28,202 A weekend away won't mean anything. 49 00:02:28,227 --> 00:02:30,008 Destinee's gonna grow up knowing 50 00:02:30,009 --> 00:02:31,926 her mama's a hard-working lady. 51 00:02:31,927 --> 00:02:33,805 - You think? - I know. 52 00:02:34,176 --> 00:02:36,258 - [SIGHS] Oh, okay. - [HORN HONKS] 53 00:02:36,968 --> 00:02:39,258 Mama's got to go. I love you. 54 00:02:39,259 --> 00:02:41,175 Mmm-mmm-mmm, give me sugar. 55 00:02:41,176 --> 00:02:42,899 - [BETS CHUCKLES] - I love you. 56 00:02:42,924 --> 00:02:44,696 - All right. Thank y'all. Bye. - Ah. 57 00:02:44,721 --> 00:02:45,763 - Go get 'em, girl. - Of course. 58 00:02:45,787 --> 00:02:47,610 - Okay. - You say, "Bye-bye, Mama"? 59 00:02:47,635 --> 00:02:49,509 Say "Bye-bye, Mama. 60 00:02:49,510 --> 00:02:51,092 - Bye-bye." - [DOOR CLOSES] 61 00:02:51,594 --> 00:02:53,509 [OBIE] My grandpa used to say to me, 62 00:02:53,510 --> 00:02:56,342 "Obie, you got a penny, you save that penny 63 00:02:56,343 --> 00:02:59,175 for a rainy day, and by gosh, it'll be worth a nickel." 64 00:03:00,180 --> 00:03:01,725 [OBIE LAUGHS] 65 00:03:01,750 --> 00:03:03,842 And that's why I love rainy days... 66 00:03:03,843 --> 00:03:07,836 'cause one day, a big storm might come. 67 00:03:07,861 --> 00:03:10,704 And if you don't have those nickels saved up, 68 00:03:11,469 --> 00:03:13,163 you're gonna get washed away. 69 00:03:13,188 --> 00:03:15,051 [THUNDER RUMBLING] 70 00:03:17,385 --> 00:03:19,425 [UP-TEMPO, DRAMATIC MUSIC] 71 00:03:19,426 --> 00:03:24,426 ♪♪ 72 00:03:51,829 --> 00:03:55,024 Synced & corrected by QueenMaddie www.addic7ed.com 73 00:03:58,718 --> 00:04:00,085 [GROUP CHANTING] Who gets it done? 74 00:04:00,110 --> 00:04:01,384 FAM, Washington. 75 00:04:01,409 --> 00:04:02,853 Who gets it done? 76 00:04:02,878 --> 00:04:04,151 FAM, Washington. 77 00:04:04,176 --> 00:04:05,676 Who gets it done? 78 00:04:05,677 --> 00:04:06,993 FAM, Washington. 79 00:04:07,018 --> 00:04:08,360 Who gets it done? 80 00:04:08,385 --> 00:04:09,819 FAM, Washington. 81 00:04:09,844 --> 00:04:11,272 Who gets it done? 82 00:04:11,297 --> 00:04:12,717 FAM, Washington. 83 00:04:12,718 --> 00:04:14,175 Who gets it done? 84 00:04:14,200 --> 00:04:15,821 FAM, Washington. 85 00:04:15,846 --> 00:04:17,163 Who gets it done? 86 00:04:17,188 --> 00:04:18,523 - FAM, Washington. - FAM, Washington. 87 00:04:18,547 --> 00:04:20,368 - [LAUGHS] Hi. - When we get in there 88 00:04:20,393 --> 00:04:22,569 and find Obie, you just let me do the talking, okay? 89 00:04:22,594 --> 00:04:24,175 Oh, no. No can do. 90 00:04:24,176 --> 00:04:26,743 You don't just walk up to Obie Garbeau II, Krystal. 91 00:04:26,768 --> 00:04:28,368 You have to be invited. 92 00:04:29,641 --> 00:04:31,780 What do you notice about all these Washingtons? 93 00:04:31,805 --> 00:04:33,757 [INDISTINCT CHATTER] 94 00:04:33,782 --> 00:04:35,258 They're all white. 95 00:04:35,259 --> 00:04:37,300 Couples. They're all couples. 96 00:04:37,301 --> 00:04:40,050 - FAM values, family values. Yes. - Family values. 97 00:04:40,051 --> 00:04:41,860 You know we're sharing a room, right? 98 00:04:42,635 --> 00:04:45,180 Oh, here we are. Paradise Cay. 99 00:04:45,885 --> 00:04:47,634 [WOMAN] Look at this. 100 00:04:47,635 --> 00:04:50,288 [INDISTINCT CHATTER] 101 00:04:50,313 --> 00:04:51,686 - How you doing? - Hi. 102 00:04:51,711 --> 00:04:53,172 - Come on in. - Who gets it done? 103 00:04:53,197 --> 00:04:54,944 FAM, Washington. 104 00:04:54,969 --> 00:04:58,038 Who gets it done? FAM, Washington. 105 00:04:58,063 --> 00:04:59,436 Who gets it done? 106 00:04:59,461 --> 00:05:00,842 FAM, Washington. 107 00:05:00,843 --> 00:05:03,843 Who gets it done? FAM, Washington. 108 00:05:03,868 --> 00:05:05,468 Who gets it done? 109 00:05:05,493 --> 00:05:06,676 FAM, Washington. 110 00:05:06,677 --> 00:05:08,944 Welcome to Paradise Cay. 111 00:05:08,969 --> 00:05:10,676 [CHEERING AND APPLAUSE] 112 00:05:10,677 --> 00:05:12,217 [SOFT MUSIC PLAYING] 113 00:05:12,218 --> 00:05:14,538 You all worked hard to get here, 114 00:05:14,563 --> 00:05:17,217 and the work has just begun. 115 00:05:17,218 --> 00:05:19,843 [CHEERING AND APPLAUSE] 116 00:05:19,868 --> 00:05:22,632 You all might recognize me from the brochures. 117 00:05:22,657 --> 00:05:23,842 I'm Harmony. 118 00:05:23,843 --> 00:05:26,342 It's my pleasure to be your emcee 119 00:05:26,343 --> 00:05:28,930 during your stay here in Paradise. 120 00:05:28,955 --> 00:05:31,655 Now, if every couple 121 00:05:31,680 --> 00:05:34,250 could send their man to check in, 122 00:05:34,275 --> 00:05:36,469 the women can have a drink. 123 00:05:40,927 --> 00:05:42,217 [CLEARS THROAT] 124 00:05:42,218 --> 00:05:45,258 - [WOMAN] How are you, dear? - [WOMAN 2] Good to see you. 125 00:05:45,259 --> 00:05:47,385 I'm guessing there's no booze in this? 126 00:05:50,343 --> 00:05:53,008 Your hair looks real nice. [CHUCKLES] 127 00:05:53,485 --> 00:05:55,375 Where do you think Obie's at? 128 00:05:55,625 --> 00:05:56,801 I don't know. 129 00:05:56,802 --> 00:05:59,821 Probably off somewhere closing a multimillion-dollar deal. 130 00:06:01,446 --> 00:06:02,676 I said I really like your hair like that. 131 00:06:02,677 --> 00:06:04,657 I heard you the first time. 132 00:06:05,176 --> 00:06:06,802 I'll go get us our room. 133 00:06:09,235 --> 00:06:10,718 [ROGER] Welcome, yeah. 134 00:06:14,385 --> 00:06:15,563 Roger. 135 00:06:17,551 --> 00:06:19,211 I want to talk to Obie. 136 00:06:19,387 --> 00:06:21,178 Everybody does. 137 00:06:21,203 --> 00:06:23,342 [INDISTINCT CHATTER] 138 00:06:23,343 --> 00:06:24,866 - Thank you. - [WOMAN] Next. 139 00:06:24,891 --> 00:06:27,432 Hi. Um, keys for Cody Bonar 140 00:06:27,457 --> 00:06:29,024 - and, um... - Absolutely. 141 00:06:31,009 --> 00:06:33,425 Krystal Stubbs. She's my, uh... 142 00:06:33,426 --> 00:06:34,759 She's my lady. [CHUCKLES] 143 00:06:34,784 --> 00:06:36,657 - She's my-my partner. - Mm. 144 00:06:36,682 --> 00:06:39,276 - Right. - My lady partner. 145 00:06:39,301 --> 00:06:41,425 [CHUCKLES] Can you believe that? 146 00:06:41,426 --> 00:06:42,967 Mm-hmm. 147 00:06:42,968 --> 00:06:47,949 - _ - [JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING] 148 00:06:47,974 --> 00:06:49,974 ♪♪ 149 00:06:52,968 --> 00:06:53,984 - What is this? - Hey! 150 00:06:54,009 --> 00:06:55,693 That's, uh, for Obie. 151 00:06:56,024 --> 00:06:58,092 Well, that's one way to get his attention. 152 00:06:58,093 --> 00:06:59,399 Can I have it back? 153 00:07:00,157 --> 00:07:02,050 There's no need to be shy, Krystal. 154 00:07:02,586 --> 00:07:04,507 Carol made a gift for Obie, too. 155 00:07:04,532 --> 00:07:06,801 Well, I just wanted to thank Obie 156 00:07:06,802 --> 00:07:09,921 for the extraordinary wealth that FAM has given us. 157 00:07:09,946 --> 00:07:13,600 It says, "Be a peli-can, not a peli-can't." 158 00:07:13,625 --> 00:07:15,092 - She stitched it herself. - [GIGGLES] 159 00:07:15,093 --> 00:07:16,467 Isn't she a stitch? 160 00:07:16,468 --> 00:07:18,227 - Aw... - [BOTH LAUGH] 161 00:07:19,336 --> 00:07:22,050 Well, Krystal, darling, I hope you don't have your heart set 162 00:07:22,051 --> 00:07:23,509 on meeting with Obie. 163 00:07:23,510 --> 00:07:25,868 You know, he only meets with one couple. 164 00:07:27,510 --> 00:07:29,342 How does he decide who to meet? 165 00:07:29,961 --> 00:07:33,172 Well, it's sort of like a competition. 166 00:07:34,063 --> 00:07:36,374 Okay, so when's the competition start? 167 00:07:36,399 --> 00:07:39,094 Honey, it already has. 168 00:07:39,375 --> 00:07:41,217 I got our keys. 169 00:07:41,218 --> 00:07:42,889 Got these cool name tags. 170 00:07:42,914 --> 00:07:44,889 You ready? You want to check out our room? 171 00:07:44,914 --> 00:07:47,338 I heard the sheets have a very high thread count. 172 00:07:47,363 --> 00:07:49,805 [GASPS] Wow. 173 00:07:52,709 --> 00:07:55,834 Oh, they're beautiful. 174 00:07:57,045 --> 00:07:58,875 I think they're creepy. 175 00:08:04,632 --> 00:08:05,632 Hmm. 176 00:08:05,657 --> 00:08:06,657 [LINE RINGING] 177 00:08:07,110 --> 00:08:08,633 Quality spread. 178 00:08:11,766 --> 00:08:13,041 So, are we sleeping head to toe or... 179 00:08:13,065 --> 00:08:14,398 Will you zip it? 180 00:08:14,751 --> 00:08:17,079 - I'm calling Destinee. - Zipped. 181 00:08:17,880 --> 00:08:19,421 [BED SQUEAKING] 182 00:08:23,135 --> 00:08:25,626 [PHONE RINGING] 183 00:08:32,051 --> 00:08:34,118 Why aren't they answering? 184 00:08:36,642 --> 00:08:40,610 You know, I love how your nails are like cute little claws. 185 00:08:40,635 --> 00:08:44,926 Cody! Can you just... be less you? 186 00:08:44,951 --> 00:08:47,430 [SIGHS] I need a minute. 187 00:08:47,455 --> 00:08:48,813 Sorry. 188 00:08:50,385 --> 00:08:51,860 I'll go change. 189 00:08:52,139 --> 00:08:53,430 [SIGHS] 190 00:08:54,897 --> 00:08:55,980 I'm sorry. 191 00:08:58,551 --> 00:08:59,801 [SIGHS] 192 00:08:59,802 --> 00:09:01,717 [BIRDS CHIRPING] 193 00:09:01,718 --> 00:09:02,913 Okay. 194 00:09:03,641 --> 00:09:06,069 We need to strategize what we're gonna say to Obie. 195 00:09:06,093 --> 00:09:08,218 You don't lay these kinds of things on a man 196 00:09:08,243 --> 00:09:10,026 - like Obie Garbeau. - [SIGHS HEAVILY] 197 00:09:10,051 --> 00:09:12,296 Honey, something is wrong. 198 00:09:12,321 --> 00:09:13,653 We should be making six figures, 199 00:09:13,678 --> 00:09:15,380 not taking out a second mortgage. 200 00:09:15,405 --> 00:09:17,139 You quit your practice. 201 00:09:17,538 --> 00:09:20,460 If you go negative on FAM, what are you gonna do next, hmm? 202 00:09:20,485 --> 00:09:22,163 Mow lawns? 203 00:09:24,202 --> 00:09:25,619 What's that? 204 00:09:27,277 --> 00:09:30,194 My new dress... for the banquet. 205 00:09:31,047 --> 00:09:32,464 Like it? 206 00:09:34,847 --> 00:09:36,796 I won't cut the tags. 207 00:09:43,134 --> 00:09:44,913 I love you, you know. 208 00:09:53,100 --> 00:09:55,109 I know it. 209 00:09:55,134 --> 00:09:56,717 [QUIET MUSIC] 210 00:09:56,718 --> 00:09:58,124 Mm. 211 00:10:00,163 --> 00:10:01,413 Hey. 212 00:10:03,968 --> 00:10:05,616 Let's crush these losers. 213 00:10:05,641 --> 00:10:07,683 [CAROL LAUGHS] 214 00:10:14,567 --> 00:10:17,257 You don't have to apologize all the time, you know. 215 00:10:18,171 --> 00:10:19,713 Yeah, I know. 216 00:10:21,600 --> 00:10:23,178 I get on your nerves. 217 00:10:23,303 --> 00:10:26,177 Yeah, you drive me crazy, but who cares? 218 00:10:26,468 --> 00:10:27,801 I care. 219 00:10:27,802 --> 00:10:28,843 What? 220 00:10:30,176 --> 00:10:31,801 Come out here. 221 00:10:32,171 --> 00:10:33,759 I said I care. 222 00:10:34,503 --> 00:10:35,802 Put your pants on. 223 00:10:35,827 --> 00:10:37,983 - I'm sorry. - [DOOR CLOSES] 224 00:10:38,927 --> 00:10:40,397 Sorry. 225 00:10:46,968 --> 00:10:48,176 [SIGHS] 226 00:10:51,593 --> 00:10:53,561 Why do you care, Cody? 227 00:11:00,053 --> 00:11:02,819 Because when... when we... 228 00:11:05,408 --> 00:11:06,949 When you let me... 229 00:11:10,577 --> 00:11:12,014 Cody. 230 00:11:14,551 --> 00:11:16,425 [WHISPERING] That was special to me. 231 00:11:17,053 --> 00:11:18,686 We should get going. 232 00:11:19,764 --> 00:11:22,176 Yeah, yeah. Can't be late. 233 00:11:26,843 --> 00:11:29,133 [GENTLE MUSIC] 234 00:11:29,134 --> 00:11:31,176 ♪♪ 235 00:11:32,804 --> 00:11:34,624 Let me see you in this. 236 00:11:49,343 --> 00:11:50,905 Now zip me up. 237 00:11:57,388 --> 00:12:00,902 [JARRING MUSIC] 238 00:12:00,927 --> 00:12:02,592 ♪♪ 239 00:12:02,593 --> 00:12:03,803 [APPLAUSE] 240 00:12:03,828 --> 00:12:06,068 [HARMONY] Hailing from Orlando adjacent, 241 00:12:06,093 --> 00:12:09,264 it's Carroll and Carol Wilkes. 242 00:12:09,289 --> 00:12:10,735 [CHEERING AND APPLAUSE] 243 00:12:10,760 --> 00:12:12,927 [CARROLL GRUNTING] 244 00:12:15,134 --> 00:12:16,384 What? 245 00:12:16,385 --> 00:12:18,467 I like this outfit on you. 246 00:12:18,468 --> 00:12:21,258 [HARMONY] Also from very near Orlando, 247 00:12:21,259 --> 00:12:23,926 put your hands together for... 248 00:12:23,927 --> 00:12:25,425 [MICROPHONE FEEDBACK] 249 00:12:25,426 --> 00:12:27,436 [QUIETLY] Yeah, but are they married? 250 00:12:28,385 --> 00:12:30,050 Okay, sorry, folks. 251 00:12:30,051 --> 00:12:32,935 Uh, now, let's pound those palms 252 00:12:32,960 --> 00:12:37,068 for Cody Bonar and, uh, Krystal Stubbs. 253 00:12:37,093 --> 00:12:39,300 [SCATTERED APPLAUSE] 254 00:12:39,301 --> 00:12:41,592 [UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING] 255 00:12:41,617 --> 00:12:44,138 Is everyone else here married? 256 00:12:44,163 --> 00:12:47,050 Yes. Everyone but, uh, but Nigel. 257 00:12:47,051 --> 00:12:48,968 Hi. Hi, Nigel. 258 00:12:49,283 --> 00:12:50,733 So, are we losing? 259 00:12:53,022 --> 00:12:54,669 I feel like I'm winning. 260 00:12:54,694 --> 00:12:56,384 [MUSIC ENDS] 261 00:12:56,385 --> 00:12:58,050 [HARMONY] And now, 262 00:12:58,843 --> 00:13:02,008 the man who made this all possible... 263 00:13:02,009 --> 00:13:05,646 the creator and progenitor of the incomparable 264 00:13:05,671 --> 00:13:07,509 Garbeau System, 265 00:13:07,510 --> 00:13:11,300 it's Obie Garbeau II. 266 00:13:11,325 --> 00:13:16,325 [CHEERING AND APPLAUSE] 267 00:13:18,980 --> 00:13:22,522 And, as always, by his side, 268 00:13:22,547 --> 00:13:25,983 the first lady of making dreams come true, 269 00:13:26,008 --> 00:13:28,166 his beautiful wife, Louise. 270 00:13:28,191 --> 00:13:30,275 [CHEERING AND APPLAUSE] 271 00:13:36,677 --> 00:13:40,009 - [LOUD CHEERING] - [MAN] Whoa... 272 00:13:42,992 --> 00:13:44,801 Okay, settle down. 273 00:13:45,875 --> 00:13:47,342 You know, folks, 274 00:13:47,656 --> 00:13:49,987 I've always felt that we could learn a great deal 275 00:13:50,012 --> 00:13:52,273 from our brethren in the animal kingdom. 276 00:13:54,187 --> 00:13:58,652 But none more so than the noble pelican. 277 00:13:59,789 --> 00:14:02,926 Now, why do I revere this beautiful bird? 278 00:14:04,660 --> 00:14:07,236 The pelican is an animal both wily and fierce. 279 00:14:07,261 --> 00:14:08,384 She's graceful 280 00:14:08,385 --> 00:14:10,908 as she soars through the sky searching for food, 281 00:14:10,933 --> 00:14:12,433 yet ruthless... 282 00:14:13,308 --> 00:14:15,847 when she dive-bombs for her prey. 283 00:14:18,970 --> 00:14:20,722 She observes. 284 00:14:22,636 --> 00:14:24,191 She plans. 285 00:14:25,715 --> 00:14:26,807 Attacks! 286 00:14:26,832 --> 00:14:28,550 [AUDIENCE GASPING] 287 00:14:28,575 --> 00:14:30,885 [SCATTERED LAUGHTER] 288 00:14:32,449 --> 00:14:37,127 Learn from the pelican. 289 00:14:37,152 --> 00:14:42,152 [CHEERING AND APPLAUSE] 290 00:14:45,730 --> 00:14:48,860 - [MAN] Yeah! - [MAN 2] Yeah! Yes! 291 00:14:48,885 --> 00:14:50,467 [HARMONY] Tapes of this presentation 292 00:14:50,468 --> 00:14:52,629 will be available for five dollars. 293 00:14:52,654 --> 00:14:54,871 - Thank you. - [MAN] Yeah! 294 00:14:58,259 --> 00:14:59,840 Oh... 295 00:14:59,865 --> 00:15:01,822 Oh, here comes the grub. 296 00:15:01,847 --> 00:15:05,008 [GUESTS GASPING] 297 00:15:05,009 --> 00:15:07,244 - FAM-burger Helper. - [KRYSTAL] Come on. 298 00:15:07,269 --> 00:15:09,050 - Great. - I do, I love this stuff. 299 00:15:09,051 --> 00:15:10,884 You put a little pepper on it, I could eat this all day. 300 00:15:10,885 --> 00:15:12,027 [CAROL] Oh, and you do. 301 00:15:12,052 --> 00:15:14,486 - [CARROLL] And I do. - [TRINA] So, now, Carol, 302 00:15:14,511 --> 00:15:17,190 I am just sitting here, loving your dress. 303 00:15:17,215 --> 00:15:20,386 Oh, this old thing? [LAUGHS] 304 00:15:20,411 --> 00:15:22,760 I'm just kidding. It's brand-new. 305 00:15:22,785 --> 00:15:25,776 - FAM has been so good to us. - Us, too. 306 00:15:25,801 --> 00:15:27,885 Fact, we just bought ourselves a second boat. 307 00:15:27,910 --> 00:15:29,308 - Ski boat. - [LAUGHS] 308 00:15:29,333 --> 00:15:32,860 Oh. How darling. 309 00:15:34,152 --> 00:15:36,902 [TRINA] Oh, and your earrings are darling, too. 310 00:15:36,927 --> 00:15:38,955 - Enjoy. - Oh, I got them at this divine 311 00:15:38,980 --> 00:15:40,433 little boutique in Boca... 312 00:15:40,706 --> 00:15:42,277 - We love Boca. - Toilet paper must be 313 00:15:42,302 --> 00:15:43,740 selling really well to, uh... 314 00:15:43,765 --> 00:15:45,434 [LAUGHS] get yourself a new boat, huh? 315 00:15:45,459 --> 00:15:47,248 I'm not eating any of this crap. 316 00:15:48,170 --> 00:15:49,786 [CODY] Are you selling the one-ply? 317 00:15:49,811 --> 00:15:51,102 - [CARROLL] Mm-hmm. - One-ply. 318 00:15:51,103 --> 00:15:52,601 - So do we. - Right? 319 00:15:52,602 --> 00:15:54,740 [CODY] Personally, I'm glad FAM doesn't make two-ply. 320 00:15:54,765 --> 00:15:56,746 I think one-ply is just fine, thank you, 321 00:15:56,771 --> 00:15:58,382 I mean, unless there's something wrong with your... 322 00:15:58,406 --> 00:16:01,131 - [CHAIR SCRAPES] - I need some air. 323 00:16:01,967 --> 00:16:03,545 - [CAROL] Oh. - [TRINA] Oh. 324 00:16:03,570 --> 00:16:06,551 Um, as I was saying, i- if I want two-ply, 325 00:16:06,576 --> 00:16:08,818 you know what I do? I just fold my one-ply. Ha! 326 00:16:08,843 --> 00:16:10,896 - That's math. - [CARROLL] Smart, that's it. 327 00:16:10,921 --> 00:16:13,245 [PERCUSSIVE MUSIC] 328 00:16:13,270 --> 00:16:14,474 Hey. 329 00:16:14,499 --> 00:16:21,499 ♪♪ 330 00:16:30,858 --> 00:16:31,974 Hey! 331 00:16:37,449 --> 00:16:39,709 Hey! Hey, I know you. 332 00:16:49,894 --> 00:16:51,686 [LAUGHS SOFTLY] 333 00:16:52,701 --> 00:16:54,334 What are you doing here? 334 00:16:56,009 --> 00:16:58,959 Just trying my best to help out. 335 00:16:59,125 --> 00:17:02,249 I thought you told me Obie Garbeau was a killer. 336 00:17:02,570 --> 00:17:03,717 Yeah. 337 00:17:04,324 --> 00:17:05,982 A killer businessman. 338 00:17:07,357 --> 00:17:08,513 No. 339 00:17:09,131 --> 00:17:10,568 You hate Obie. 340 00:17:11,051 --> 00:17:12,920 You made that pretty clear. 341 00:17:20,329 --> 00:17:23,115 Please just... 342 00:17:23,140 --> 00:17:25,018 [WHISPERS] don't talk to me. 343 00:17:25,043 --> 00:17:26,271 Not now, 344 00:17:26,457 --> 00:17:28,076 not ever again. 345 00:17:28,101 --> 00:17:31,078 [OMINOUS MUSIC] 346 00:17:31,103 --> 00:17:33,145 ♪♪ 347 00:17:45,477 --> 00:17:49,756 [LIGHTER CLICKING] 348 00:18:05,860 --> 00:18:08,860 [MUFFLED ARGUING] 349 00:18:15,019 --> 00:18:16,638 Jesus. 350 00:18:24,811 --> 00:18:26,186 [GASPS SOFTLY] 351 00:18:40,414 --> 00:18:41,443 [WATER SPRAYING] 352 00:18:41,468 --> 00:18:42,693 [GASPS] 353 00:18:42,718 --> 00:18:44,834 Oh-oh, shit. 354 00:18:45,393 --> 00:18:46,934 [PANTING] 355 00:18:46,959 --> 00:18:48,326 [BED SQUEAKS] 356 00:19:00,125 --> 00:19:02,167 [LINE RINGING] 357 00:19:13,244 --> 00:19:14,701 [BETS] Gomes residence. 358 00:19:14,726 --> 00:19:18,412 Bets. Sorry to call so late. 359 00:19:18,437 --> 00:19:19,857 How's Neenee? 360 00:19:19,882 --> 00:19:23,029 Oh, she's good. She ate like a champion, 361 00:19:23,054 --> 00:19:24,928 then she pooped like a champion. 362 00:19:24,953 --> 00:19:26,743 Now she's fast asleep. 363 00:19:26,768 --> 00:19:28,592 That's my girl. 364 00:19:29,362 --> 00:19:31,319 I tried y'all earlier. 365 00:19:31,344 --> 00:19:33,365 We went to the park. 366 00:19:33,390 --> 00:19:36,154 Harold wanted to show Destinee the ducklings. 367 00:19:37,978 --> 00:19:39,263 Bets, I know I'm crazy, 368 00:19:39,288 --> 00:19:41,935 but can I hear her breathe? 369 00:19:42,732 --> 00:19:44,998 Oh, honey, that isn't crazy at all. 370 00:19:45,436 --> 00:19:47,584 [QUIETLY] Hold on just a sec, okay? 371 00:19:53,092 --> 00:19:54,787 [WHISPERS] Okay, here she is. 372 00:19:56,686 --> 00:19:58,396 [EXHALES] 373 00:20:01,395 --> 00:20:03,826 [BREATHING QUIETLY] 374 00:20:05,353 --> 00:20:07,102 [BREATHING OVER PHONE] 375 00:20:07,103 --> 00:20:08,474 Bets? 376 00:20:08,705 --> 00:20:09,927 I'm here. 377 00:20:10,329 --> 00:20:11,701 Thank you. 378 00:20:13,300 --> 00:20:14,990 Make us proud. 379 00:20:15,956 --> 00:20:17,498 [SIGHS] 380 00:20:20,066 --> 00:20:21,584 [DOOR OPENS] 381 00:20:22,204 --> 00:20:24,763 Hi! Where did you go? 382 00:20:24,959 --> 00:20:25,997 You left me alone 383 00:20:26,022 --> 00:20:27,771 - at a couples' banquet, Krystal. - No, Cody... 384 00:20:27,795 --> 00:20:28,796 - Yes! - No, the weirdest thing hap... 385 00:20:28,820 --> 00:20:30,333 - Cody, please. - I got stuck 386 00:20:30,358 --> 00:20:31,911 talking to Nigel, Krystal. 387 00:20:31,936 --> 00:20:34,691 I mean, how... how are we supposed to win 388 00:20:34,716 --> 00:20:36,325 if you're not even playing? 389 00:20:36,350 --> 00:20:38,661 What's "winning"? What's "playing"? 390 00:20:38,686 --> 00:20:40,669 - Shh. - I-I'm here to talk to Obie, 391 00:20:40,694 --> 00:20:41,943 not take this crap from you. 392 00:20:41,968 --> 00:20:44,216 Oh, you think I want to give you crud? 393 00:20:44,241 --> 00:20:45,824 I don't want to give you crud. 394 00:20:45,849 --> 00:20:48,466 I just, I just... You know what I want? 395 00:20:48,732 --> 00:20:51,442 I just, I just want to make you happy. 396 00:20:51,763 --> 00:20:53,942 What do I have to do, Krystal, to make you happy? 397 00:20:53,967 --> 00:20:55,372 Tell me, please. 398 00:20:56,700 --> 00:20:59,102 Well, you can start by taking your head out of your ass 399 00:20:59,103 --> 00:21:01,786 and shoving it in the toilet where it belongs. 400 00:21:02,308 --> 00:21:03,715 Yes, ma'am. 401 00:21:03,740 --> 00:21:05,677 - Anything you want. - Cody? 402 00:21:07,171 --> 00:21:09,452 [CODY RETCHES] 403 00:21:09,477 --> 00:21:11,161 - [GURGLING] - Cody! 404 00:21:11,186 --> 00:21:13,060 [SQUEALS, LAUGHS] 405 00:21:13,085 --> 00:21:14,599 [PANTING] Anything else? 406 00:21:14,624 --> 00:21:16,239 Flush it. 407 00:21:17,601 --> 00:21:20,427 - Will I die? - Oh, God, I hope so. 408 00:21:20,452 --> 00:21:23,368 - [LAUGHING] - [TOILET FLUSHING] 409 00:21:26,974 --> 00:21:28,411 [CODY COUGHING] 410 00:21:28,436 --> 00:21:32,052 [CONTINUES LAUGHING] 411 00:21:32,077 --> 00:21:33,132 What now? 412 00:21:33,157 --> 00:21:34,942 Take your pants off. 413 00:21:36,144 --> 00:21:37,880 [ZIPPER OPENS] 414 00:21:43,436 --> 00:21:46,476 [GENTLE MUSIC] 415 00:21:46,477 --> 00:21:48,477 ♪♪ 416 00:21:53,644 --> 00:21:55,882 You're not a virgin, are you? 417 00:21:57,343 --> 00:21:58,819 No. 418 00:21:59,536 --> 00:22:01,952 I'm-I'm very good at sex. 419 00:22:07,088 --> 00:22:09,483 I want you to fuck me so good 420 00:22:09,508 --> 00:22:13,296 that I forget where I am and what I'm doing here. 421 00:22:18,265 --> 00:22:21,155 Don't you dare kiss me, toilet boy. 422 00:22:22,013 --> 00:22:24,468 [CODY MOANS] 423 00:22:24,493 --> 00:22:26,285 [LIGHT CLICKS] 424 00:22:29,563 --> 00:22:31,616 [KNOCKING ON DOOR] 425 00:22:36,853 --> 00:22:38,852 [POUNDING ON DOOR] 426 00:22:38,853 --> 00:22:42,366 [INDISTINCT CHATTER] 427 00:22:42,391 --> 00:22:44,405 [GASPING] 428 00:22:46,351 --> 00:22:47,608 [ROGER] Wake up. 429 00:22:48,003 --> 00:22:51,272 Get to the ballroom, now. 430 00:22:55,010 --> 00:22:56,499 Shit. 431 00:22:57,351 --> 00:22:58,427 Crap. 432 00:22:58,452 --> 00:23:01,227 [CLOCK TICKING] 433 00:23:01,228 --> 00:23:03,686 [INDISTINCT MURMURING] 434 00:23:19,477 --> 00:23:21,561 [MURMURING CONTINUES] 435 00:23:29,155 --> 00:23:32,726 Hi, I'm Todd Burger, this is my wife Trina. 436 00:23:33,373 --> 00:23:36,905 In my old life, I was just a clerk in a sporting goods store. 437 00:23:37,581 --> 00:23:40,372 I hated my J-O-B, and I hated my boss, 438 00:23:40,397 --> 00:23:42,296 who was a royal S-O-B. 439 00:23:42,757 --> 00:23:45,060 One day, at my brother's son's funeral, 440 00:23:45,061 --> 00:23:47,944 a friend of his started explaining the Garbeau System, 441 00:23:48,519 --> 00:23:50,288 and it was like a... 442 00:23:51,163 --> 00:23:53,061 like a religious revelation. 443 00:23:53,086 --> 00:23:55,627 [APPLAUSE] 444 00:23:57,720 --> 00:23:59,661 [THORTON] I was addicted to caffeine. 445 00:24:00,515 --> 00:24:02,144 I was addicted to marijuana, 446 00:24:02,145 --> 00:24:04,866 smoked it two or three times a week. 447 00:24:04,891 --> 00:24:06,671 I ate pills for breakfast, 448 00:24:06,927 --> 00:24:08,983 and Wild Turkey for lunch. 449 00:24:09,326 --> 00:24:11,093 The whiskey, not the lunch meat. 450 00:24:11,126 --> 00:24:15,851 I ate cat food, dog food, bird food, 451 00:24:16,270 --> 00:24:18,601 uh, some human food, but not a lot. 452 00:24:19,253 --> 00:24:21,515 At my lowest, I put a gun in my mouth. 453 00:24:22,436 --> 00:24:25,601 But, friends, I'm proud to say that now 454 00:24:25,602 --> 00:24:27,663 I put Obie's words in my mouth, 455 00:24:27,688 --> 00:24:30,866 and my downline does whatever I say! 456 00:24:30,891 --> 00:24:32,897 - [APPLAUSE] - [WOMAN] Yes. 457 00:24:35,686 --> 00:24:38,765 [THORTON] I have to laugh when I think about how low I was. 458 00:24:39,178 --> 00:24:43,310 But recently I did something to make sure I never get that low again. 459 00:24:44,436 --> 00:24:46,226 I bought a hang glider. 460 00:24:46,251 --> 00:24:47,453 Yowzah! 461 00:24:47,478 --> 00:24:49,286 [APPLAUSE] 462 00:24:49,311 --> 00:24:53,528 Now I have a steam room and a sauna. 463 00:24:53,725 --> 00:24:57,935 Sometimes I want to sweat, and I can't even decide how. 464 00:24:57,960 --> 00:25:01,419 - [TRINA LAUGHS] - [APPLAUSE] 465 00:25:01,638 --> 00:25:02,768 All right, honey. 466 00:25:02,769 --> 00:25:04,317 Are you ready to bring it? 467 00:25:05,319 --> 00:25:07,112 - Yeah. - Come on. 468 00:25:09,769 --> 00:25:11,286 - Hello. - Hi. 469 00:25:11,311 --> 00:25:14,744 Hi. [CHUCKLES] Hello, everybody. 470 00:25:14,769 --> 00:25:17,989 - I'm Carroll. - And I'm Carol. 471 00:25:18,014 --> 00:25:22,703 And I have always been obsessed with smiles, so, 472 00:25:23,051 --> 00:25:26,758 in my 20s, I started my own dental practice 473 00:25:26,783 --> 00:25:29,515 - and met this pretty little lady... - Oh. 474 00:25:29,540 --> 00:25:32,249 when she walked in with those pearly whites. 475 00:25:32,274 --> 00:25:34,744 Or at-at least now they're pearly whites. 476 00:25:34,769 --> 00:25:36,710 [LAUGHS] 477 00:25:36,735 --> 00:25:39,757 Yeah. Yeah, no, I-I, I-I fixed her up. 478 00:25:39,782 --> 00:25:41,203 We-we fell in love, 479 00:25:41,228 --> 00:25:43,671 and-and I married her as quick as I could. 480 00:25:44,307 --> 00:25:46,223 Yeah, I was, uh... 481 00:25:46,436 --> 00:25:49,977 [LAUGHS] I-I was doing pretty good, actually. 482 00:25:49,978 --> 00:25:52,227 I, uh, I was happy. 483 00:25:52,937 --> 00:25:56,219 - I... - Well, not as happy as we are now. 484 00:25:56,244 --> 00:25:59,508 Thanks to FAM, we are now living in our dream house. 485 00:25:59,533 --> 00:26:02,561 - Yeah. - I'm talking eight bathrooms, 486 00:26:02,586 --> 00:26:04,750 six bedrooms, a game room. 487 00:26:04,775 --> 00:26:08,070 I mean, I swear, he's gonna leave me for Ms. Pac-Man one day. 488 00:26:08,095 --> 00:26:09,485 - [BOTH LAUGH] - [CARROLL] That's right. 489 00:26:09,509 --> 00:26:12,891 Hey, you want to know the best part? 490 00:26:13,228 --> 00:26:14,742 Are you ready, honey? 491 00:26:14,767 --> 00:26:17,308 FAM gives us strength! 492 00:26:17,333 --> 00:26:18,624 [WOMAN] Yes. 493 00:26:18,853 --> 00:26:20,768 [WHOOPS] 494 00:26:20,769 --> 00:26:22,726 [DRAMATIC MUSIC] 495 00:26:22,727 --> 00:26:24,435 ♪♪ 496 00:26:24,436 --> 00:26:28,036 [APPLAUSE] 497 00:26:28,061 --> 00:26:30,477 [GASPING, CHEERING] 498 00:26:34,014 --> 00:26:36,098 [CHEERING CONTINUES] 499 00:26:36,123 --> 00:26:39,773 [APPLAUSE CONTINUES] 500 00:26:39,798 --> 00:26:42,281 Holy crap, Cody. I know what to do. 501 00:26:42,306 --> 00:26:45,492 - No. I can't lift you like that. - No, no, no. [WHISPERING] 502 00:26:46,297 --> 00:26:47,435 Really? 503 00:26:47,436 --> 00:26:49,060 - You serious? - Mm-hmm. 504 00:26:49,061 --> 00:26:51,103 [SHARP EXHALE] 505 00:26:54,270 --> 00:26:56,270 [AUDIENCE MUTTERING] 506 00:26:59,092 --> 00:27:01,023 Hello, FAM family. 507 00:27:01,048 --> 00:27:02,339 I'm Cody. 508 00:27:02,717 --> 00:27:04,242 Cody Bonar. 509 00:27:04,267 --> 00:27:06,078 I'm a proud Washington. 510 00:27:06,103 --> 00:27:08,789 [SCATTERED APPLAUSE] 511 00:27:08,814 --> 00:27:11,245 Mr. Garbeau, this is such an honor. 512 00:27:11,270 --> 00:27:13,258 I can barely stand it. 513 00:27:13,283 --> 00:27:15,328 You're the father I wish I had. 514 00:27:15,926 --> 00:27:17,953 And you're the man I want to be. 515 00:27:20,947 --> 00:27:22,922 But best of all, 516 00:27:23,621 --> 00:27:26,656 you gave me the love of a good woman. 517 00:27:30,287 --> 00:27:32,820 Which is why I want you to see this. 518 00:27:33,311 --> 00:27:34,719 [GASPS] 519 00:27:35,686 --> 00:27:37,437 - Oh. - [KRYSTAL] Cody! 520 00:27:38,727 --> 00:27:40,430 Krystal Stubbs... 521 00:27:41,147 --> 00:27:42,594 you've... 522 00:27:43,704 --> 00:27:45,953 you've made me happier... 523 00:27:46,758 --> 00:27:48,144 than I've ever been. 524 00:27:48,145 --> 00:27:50,523 [MAN] Oh, my goodness, can you believe this? 525 00:27:50,701 --> 00:27:52,187 I love you. 526 00:27:53,734 --> 00:27:55,922 And I'm in love with you. 527 00:27:57,493 --> 00:27:59,617 [BOTH CHUCKLE] 528 00:27:59,928 --> 00:28:01,500 Will you marry me? 529 00:28:01,525 --> 00:28:03,414 [WOMEN TITTERING] 530 00:28:05,401 --> 00:28:08,156 - Yes! Yes. - [WOMAN SQUEALS] 531 00:28:08,181 --> 00:28:11,305 - Yes, yes. Yes. - [APPLAUSE] 532 00:28:11,330 --> 00:28:14,742 [CHEERING] 533 00:28:16,838 --> 00:28:19,070 [APPLAUSE CONTINUES] 534 00:28:22,844 --> 00:28:25,086 [FEEDBACK WHINES] 535 00:28:26,444 --> 00:28:28,110 I like the strong man. 536 00:28:28,531 --> 00:28:30,353 [BOTH YELLING] 537 00:28:31,870 --> 00:28:33,453 [CARROLL] Baby, we did it. 538 00:28:33,478 --> 00:28:35,164 [CAROL AND CARROLL LAUGHING AND SHOUTING] 539 00:28:35,189 --> 00:28:37,172 - Oh, man! - Oh... 540 00:28:37,197 --> 00:28:38,805 [CARROLL] Okay. 541 00:28:38,830 --> 00:28:40,328 [CARROLL WHOOPS] 542 00:28:40,353 --> 00:28:42,104 [FEEDBACK WHINES] 543 00:28:48,443 --> 00:28:50,000 [EXHALES] 544 00:28:54,242 --> 00:28:55,617 [SCOFFS] 545 00:28:56,772 --> 00:28:58,771 Can you believe how strong Carroll is? That's... 546 00:28:58,775 --> 00:29:00,064 I can't right now. 547 00:29:00,089 --> 00:29:01,680 With you and FAM. 548 00:29:01,705 --> 00:29:03,496 I just want to fucking scream. 549 00:29:04,195 --> 00:29:05,506 [SIGHS] 550 00:29:05,531 --> 00:29:07,852 Well, you sure aren't acting like a Washington. 551 00:29:07,877 --> 00:29:09,586 We just lost. 552 00:29:10,353 --> 00:29:11,945 How am I supposed to act? 553 00:29:11,970 --> 00:29:14,539 Well, you can't look desperate, because Obie hates that. 554 00:29:14,564 --> 00:29:16,038 I am desperate. 555 00:29:16,063 --> 00:29:19,478 I'm a single mom and I was finally making things work. 556 00:29:19,503 --> 00:29:21,391 And that man took it away from me. 557 00:29:24,911 --> 00:29:26,534 You're not single. 558 00:29:26,559 --> 00:29:27,929 [SCOFFS] 559 00:29:28,456 --> 00:29:30,914 Let me clarify something for you. 560 00:29:30,939 --> 00:29:34,578 That... was a big old bag of bullcrap. 561 00:29:37,620 --> 00:29:39,287 But we-we just... 562 00:29:44,436 --> 00:29:46,031 And I know you like bossing me, 563 00:29:46,056 --> 00:29:47,517 and I... a-and I like being bossed... 564 00:29:47,541 --> 00:29:49,602 Yeah, but I don't like you. 565 00:29:51,870 --> 00:29:53,180 Sure you do. 566 00:29:54,051 --> 00:29:55,445 Sort of. 567 00:29:55,470 --> 00:29:56,578 Don't you? 568 00:29:57,758 --> 00:29:59,602 [DOOR OPENS] 569 00:30:00,898 --> 00:30:02,352 [DOOR CLOSES] 570 00:30:06,186 --> 00:30:08,018 [QUIET, ATMOSPHERIC MUSIC] 571 00:30:08,019 --> 00:30:10,556 ♪♪ 572 00:30:17,978 --> 00:30:20,095 She's not coming back, is she? 573 00:30:31,217 --> 00:30:33,452 [INHALES, BLOWS] 574 00:30:33,477 --> 00:30:35,476 [SNIFFLES] 575 00:30:35,477 --> 00:30:37,352 [SHUDDERS] 576 00:30:37,353 --> 00:30:40,144 [CRYING SOFTLY] 577 00:30:40,145 --> 00:30:42,103 [EXHALES] 578 00:30:43,242 --> 00:30:45,189 [BIRD SQUAWKS] 579 00:30:46,610 --> 00:30:47,744 Hello? 580 00:30:47,769 --> 00:30:51,299 [BIRD SQUAWKS] 581 00:31:08,519 --> 00:31:10,150 [SQUAWKS] 582 00:31:14,013 --> 00:31:15,370 [GASPS] 583 00:31:15,395 --> 00:31:17,436 [SQUAWKING] 584 00:31:22,158 --> 00:31:24,127 [WHISPERS] Hi. 585 00:31:31,395 --> 00:31:33,395 [OVEN CLICKING] 586 00:31:35,978 --> 00:31:38,061 [FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING] 587 00:31:39,993 --> 00:31:43,064 Set that for 220 or it'll burn the roof of your mouth. 588 00:31:43,623 --> 00:31:45,622 And who are you? 589 00:31:46,084 --> 00:31:47,791 Krystal Stubbs. 590 00:31:49,292 --> 00:31:51,064 The alligator widow. 591 00:31:56,564 --> 00:31:59,861 I bet you don't know who Judi Sheppard Missett is, either. 592 00:32:02,959 --> 00:32:05,111 It's 1969, 593 00:32:05,136 --> 00:32:08,244 a- and Judi's teaching a dance class in Chicago. 594 00:32:08,675 --> 00:32:10,478 But... [BLOWS] 595 00:32:10,503 --> 00:32:13,447 she's perturbed by the low dropout... 596 00:32:14,097 --> 00:32:15,097 But... 597 00:32:15,239 --> 00:32:18,193 she's perturbed by the high dropout rate, 598 00:32:18,218 --> 00:32:22,897 so she decides to start each class with a little jazz. 599 00:32:23,530 --> 00:32:25,404 Sounds kind of cheesy, right? 600 00:32:25,936 --> 00:32:27,518 Well, today... [BLOWS] 601 00:32:27,543 --> 00:32:29,483 - Hmm. - Uh... 602 00:32:30,384 --> 00:32:33,951 Jazzercise is a multimillion-dollar industry 603 00:32:33,976 --> 00:32:36,295 with over 6,000 franchises... 604 00:32:36,320 --> 00:32:39,445 Do you, uh, need to attend to your Hot Pockets? 605 00:32:53,395 --> 00:32:55,101 I work at Rebel Rapids, 606 00:32:55,126 --> 00:32:57,030 not five minutes from Disney World, 607 00:32:57,055 --> 00:32:59,296 where I head up the Splashercize program. 608 00:32:59,769 --> 00:33:01,171 Now, until you shut me down, 609 00:33:01,196 --> 00:33:03,593 I had the entire Orlando downline in there, 610 00:33:03,618 --> 00:33:06,546 and the whole water park stocked to the gills with FAM products. 611 00:33:06,571 --> 00:33:09,755 FAM protein shakes, FAM vitamins, FAM workout videos. 612 00:33:09,780 --> 00:33:11,893 I'm talking about the perfect little FAM outlet 613 00:33:11,894 --> 00:33:13,460 right next door to the Happiest Place 614 00:33:13,485 --> 00:33:15,312 on God's goddamn green Earth. 615 00:33:15,337 --> 00:33:18,718 Now, this book is a plan to franchise Splashercize 616 00:33:18,743 --> 00:33:22,343 to pools around the country, all using the Garbeau name. 617 00:33:22,368 --> 00:33:25,555 Now, any idiot can see that FAM would make more money this way. 618 00:33:25,853 --> 00:33:30,726 And, Mr. Obie Garbeau II, I know you're no idiot. 619 00:33:31,086 --> 00:33:33,805 The best part is, you don't even need to lift a pinky. 620 00:33:33,830 --> 00:33:35,954 All you got to do is nod your head yes. 621 00:33:35,979 --> 00:33:38,328 [UPBEAT MUSIC] 622 00:33:38,353 --> 00:33:40,352 ♪♪ 623 00:33:40,353 --> 00:33:42,078 [MUSIC STOPS] 624 00:33:42,937 --> 00:33:44,164 [OVEN DINGS] 625 00:33:44,189 --> 00:33:46,522 Time's up, alligator widow. 626 00:33:53,216 --> 00:33:55,014 Look at me talking your ear off, well... 627 00:33:55,767 --> 00:33:58,846 You're probably low blood sugar. I'll just... 628 00:33:59,455 --> 00:34:00,861 leave that. 629 00:34:01,256 --> 00:34:03,494 Got a tip on sales. 630 00:34:06,705 --> 00:34:08,705 Don't be so desperate. 631 00:34:15,424 --> 00:34:16,502 Ah. 632 00:34:18,490 --> 00:34:21,286 [SIGHING DEEPLY] 633 00:34:21,311 --> 00:34:24,705 [HEART BEATING] 634 00:34:28,283 --> 00:34:30,283 [SIZZLING] 635 00:34:33,428 --> 00:34:36,908 [BREATHING HEAVILY] 636 00:34:43,628 --> 00:34:48,628 [HEART BEATING FASTER] 637 00:34:55,350 --> 00:34:56,853 [OBIE] Louise. 638 00:34:58,202 --> 00:34:59,822 Louise. 639 00:35:01,643 --> 00:35:03,916 You know... I hate... 640 00:35:03,941 --> 00:35:05,478 fruit! 641 00:35:08,453 --> 00:35:10,822 - [LOUISE] Oh, my Lord. - [GROANS] 642 00:35:10,847 --> 00:35:12,361 Oh, my Lord, oh, my Lord. 643 00:35:12,386 --> 00:35:14,916 Oh, my Lord. Oh, oh, Obie! 644 00:35:14,941 --> 00:35:16,773 Obie, oh, my God, oh. 645 00:35:16,798 --> 00:35:19,674 - Oh... - [OBIE GROANING] 646 00:35:20,642 --> 00:35:22,744 Oh, my God, are you all right? 647 00:35:23,080 --> 00:35:25,408 Why'd you buy so much fruit? 648 00:35:26,526 --> 00:35:29,478 Um, I was doing what the doctor told me to. 649 00:35:31,159 --> 00:35:34,541 That man wants to see me in my grave. 650 00:35:34,566 --> 00:35:37,018 Oh, now, Peanut. [SHUSHES] 651 00:35:37,043 --> 00:35:39,000 Honey, you need to rest. 652 00:35:39,602 --> 00:35:40,994 What? 653 00:35:41,636 --> 00:35:42,636 Where are you going? 654 00:35:42,661 --> 00:35:45,369 I will rest when I am dead. 655 00:35:45,975 --> 00:35:47,725 [SQUISH] 656 00:35:54,863 --> 00:35:58,203 These are the affirmations of Obie Garbeau II. 657 00:35:58,228 --> 00:36:00,144 For private use only. 658 00:36:00,145 --> 00:36:02,145 [BREATHING HEAVILY] 659 00:36:03,174 --> 00:36:05,173 I am a friend of God. 660 00:36:05,644 --> 00:36:07,307 [PANTING] 661 00:36:07,332 --> 00:36:11,103 I am the true and rightful leader of FAM. 662 00:36:15,578 --> 00:36:17,416 I am... 663 00:36:17,849 --> 00:36:20,431 a vehicle of divine know-how. 664 00:36:21,019 --> 00:36:23,330 [HEART THUMPING] 665 00:36:23,355 --> 00:36:25,908 My parents were fools who deserve 666 00:36:25,933 --> 00:36:28,766 the worms that burrow through their skulls. 667 00:36:30,584 --> 00:36:33,549 [ECHOING] I am not cursed with unsightly feet. 668 00:36:33,574 --> 00:36:35,203 Hey. 669 00:36:35,228 --> 00:36:38,144 Louise loves me and me alone. 670 00:36:38,145 --> 00:36:39,197 [LAUGHTER] 671 00:36:39,222 --> 00:36:41,930 Females find me appealing to the eye 672 00:36:41,955 --> 00:36:43,744 and to the touch, 673 00:36:43,769 --> 00:36:46,814 but do not require orgasms to prove it. 674 00:36:46,839 --> 00:36:47,931 [LAUGHTER] 675 00:36:47,956 --> 00:36:50,541 I am not excessively ticklish. 676 00:36:50,975 --> 00:36:53,702 [DISORIENTING MUSIC] 677 00:36:53,727 --> 00:36:55,760 ♪♪ 678 00:36:59,550 --> 00:37:03,713 [GROANS] 679 00:37:08,930 --> 00:37:12,596 - Elevators are not coffins to heaven. - [CHICKS CHEEPING] 680 00:37:12,621 --> 00:37:15,625 My heart is robust... 681 00:37:15,650 --> 00:37:17,476 and healthful. 682 00:37:17,477 --> 00:37:21,510 - I am the rightful leader of FAM. - [RUMBLING] 683 00:37:22,346 --> 00:37:24,346 [WIND ROARING] 684 00:37:41,766 --> 00:37:43,455 [LOUISE] You're okay. 685 00:37:44,704 --> 00:37:46,135 It's my heart. 686 00:37:46,548 --> 00:37:48,260 You're okay. 687 00:37:49,026 --> 00:37:51,776 Mr. Garbeau, you've had a mild cardiac event. 688 00:37:51,801 --> 00:37:53,486 Your heartbeat remains arrhythmic, 689 00:37:53,511 --> 00:37:55,221 but no need to worry, we'll fly you down 690 00:37:55,246 --> 00:37:58,643 to a specialist in Miami and have a pacemaker inside you by sundown. 691 00:37:58,668 --> 00:38:00,611 No, uh, no pacemaker. 692 00:38:00,636 --> 00:38:02,228 - Now, Obie... - It's a routine procedure, 693 00:38:02,252 --> 00:38:03,370 and I can assure you the doctor's... 694 00:38:03,394 --> 00:38:06,268 You don't think I know my own body? 695 00:38:06,539 --> 00:38:09,502 Arrhythmia tends to exacerbate anxiety. 696 00:38:09,527 --> 00:38:12,235 [BREATHING HEAVILY] 697 00:38:12,260 --> 00:38:14,869 Don't you ever talk like I'm not here. 698 00:38:14,894 --> 00:38:17,002 My body knows what to do! 699 00:38:17,978 --> 00:38:19,291 [CLEARS THROAT] 700 00:38:20,393 --> 00:38:22,182 You get him on that chopper. 701 00:38:23,126 --> 00:38:25,776 [HEART BEATING] 702 00:38:25,801 --> 00:38:27,217 Garbage bags. 703 00:38:30,151 --> 00:38:32,189 Get me garbage bags! 704 00:38:34,133 --> 00:38:37,822 [HEART BEATING FASTER] 705 00:38:50,275 --> 00:38:52,275 [DISTORTED GRUNT] 706 00:38:55,448 --> 00:38:57,166 [GRUNTING] 707 00:39:09,436 --> 00:39:11,143 [ROGER] Mr. Garbeau. 708 00:39:11,660 --> 00:39:13,283 [PANTING] 709 00:39:13,308 --> 00:39:14,674 Obie. 710 00:39:15,301 --> 00:39:16,807 That's enough. 711 00:39:26,433 --> 00:39:27,838 Your heart. 712 00:39:50,608 --> 00:39:54,775 It's time for me to meet with the winning Washington couple. 713 00:40:03,557 --> 00:40:06,150 - [EXHALES] - Hey, don't say a bad word. 714 00:40:06,175 --> 00:40:08,103 Yeah, I know what to say, woman. 715 00:40:12,877 --> 00:40:16,455 We just want to tell you that this is the thrill of a lifetime. 716 00:40:16,480 --> 00:40:18,033 Yes, it is. 717 00:40:18,058 --> 00:40:19,721 You've got five minutes. 718 00:40:19,746 --> 00:40:23,908 - [EXHALES] - Uh, Mr. Garbeau, uh, 719 00:40:23,933 --> 00:40:26,658 w- w-we went Washington about a-a year or so ago... 720 00:40:26,683 --> 00:40:28,291 And it's been a blessing ever since. 721 00:40:28,316 --> 00:40:30,439 Right. So blessed. 722 00:40:32,157 --> 00:40:34,650 But I, I just... 723 00:40:35,776 --> 00:40:38,478 I can't understand why our bonus checks aren't bigger. 724 00:40:38,503 --> 00:40:40,674 You know, we should be making six figures, 725 00:40:40,699 --> 00:40:43,940 and I'll be straight with you, I'm lucky to clear 30 grand a year. 726 00:40:44,178 --> 00:40:46,427 I- I'm working 60-hour weeks. 727 00:40:46,452 --> 00:40:47,828 I'm barely getting any sleep. 728 00:40:47,853 --> 00:40:50,120 I- I had savings, now I've got debt, 729 00:40:50,145 --> 00:40:55,793 and my son Carl, we had big plans for him for... school. 730 00:41:01,855 --> 00:41:04,254 I follow this system like scripture. 731 00:41:05,418 --> 00:41:08,622 The tapes, the-the-the-the retreats with the... 732 00:41:08,647 --> 00:41:11,356 - W-We do it all, whole hog. - Yeah, we do. 733 00:41:11,381 --> 00:41:13,575 I know I have to be doing something wrong, 734 00:41:13,600 --> 00:41:15,458 but for the life of me, I can't f... 735 00:41:27,113 --> 00:41:28,981 It's very simple. 736 00:41:34,839 --> 00:41:38,588 Money is like hot air. It's always rising. 737 00:41:39,644 --> 00:41:41,153 Ah... 738 00:41:44,123 --> 00:41:47,021 I sold you that house because I believe in you. 739 00:41:47,046 --> 00:41:48,560 [SIGHS] 740 00:41:49,146 --> 00:41:51,842 But you need to be honest with yourselves. 741 00:41:56,333 --> 00:42:01,785 You are Silver Washingtons living a Gold Washington lifestyle. 742 00:42:01,810 --> 00:42:03,608 Right, I-I-I said that. 743 00:42:03,633 --> 00:42:05,820 I said that if we were Gold, we wouldn't have these problems... 744 00:42:05,844 --> 00:42:07,374 I mean, challenges. [CHUCKLES] 745 00:42:07,399 --> 00:42:09,953 - [CARROLL] No, it makes sense. - Right. 746 00:42:09,978 --> 00:42:12,569 But I'm working as hard as I know how. 747 00:42:15,389 --> 00:42:16,723 Are you? 748 00:42:21,353 --> 00:42:23,394 [PERCUSSIVE MUSIC] 749 00:42:23,419 --> 00:42:25,210 ♪♪ 750 00:42:31,862 --> 00:42:34,277 - What you doing down there? - Huh? 751 00:42:34,576 --> 00:42:36,085 Going Gold. 752 00:42:39,771 --> 00:42:40,991 Can we help? 753 00:42:41,514 --> 00:42:43,272 Uh, here. 754 00:42:44,311 --> 00:42:47,561 - Oh. - Thank you. Oh. 755 00:42:47,586 --> 00:42:50,757 [INDISTINCT CHATTER] 756 00:42:55,592 --> 00:42:57,444 [SIGHS] 757 00:43:04,951 --> 00:43:07,218 Oh. Oh, my... 758 00:43:07,243 --> 00:43:09,374 Oh, gross. 759 00:43:11,197 --> 00:43:13,272 - Carol? - Hi, Krystal. 760 00:43:13,595 --> 00:43:15,952 Obie gave us a special assignment. 761 00:43:15,977 --> 00:43:17,272 You want to join in? 762 00:43:17,297 --> 00:43:18,358 Why? 763 00:43:18,383 --> 00:43:20,186 The Gold Washingtons are coming next week, 764 00:43:20,211 --> 00:43:23,370 and, I mean, who knows? Maybe we'll be here with them. 765 00:43:23,395 --> 00:43:25,718 You haven't seen Cody, have you? 766 00:43:25,743 --> 00:43:28,734 - Nope. - Probably engagement jitters. 767 00:43:29,626 --> 00:43:31,211 Same thing happened to me. 768 00:43:34,012 --> 00:43:36,177 Are you sure you don't want to scrub in? 769 00:43:36,202 --> 00:43:37,257 Nope. 770 00:43:37,282 --> 00:43:39,625 It's a fast track to success. 771 00:43:44,484 --> 00:43:46,015 Clean. 772 00:43:49,125 --> 00:43:50,702 [LOUISE LAUGHS] 773 00:43:50,727 --> 00:43:52,476 [LOUISE] Well, I thought it was wonderfully done, 774 00:43:52,477 --> 00:43:55,037 and I have to tell you, I love these glasses on you. 775 00:43:55,062 --> 00:43:58,617 [WHISPERING] And I thought your presentation was better than anyone's. 776 00:44:06,951 --> 00:44:08,382 Mr. Garbeau. 777 00:44:09,467 --> 00:44:10,836 What? 778 00:44:12,386 --> 00:44:14,882 If you got something to say, say it. 779 00:44:14,907 --> 00:44:17,640 The helicopter is gassed and ready. 780 00:44:20,376 --> 00:44:22,179 You were my favorite. 781 00:44:23,198 --> 00:44:24,859 Did you know that? 782 00:44:27,160 --> 00:44:30,211 But somewhere along the way, you began to waver. 783 00:44:30,236 --> 00:44:32,922 I just want you alive and healthy. 784 00:44:35,062 --> 00:44:38,477 You still think that the soul is inside the body, don't you? 785 00:44:40,989 --> 00:44:43,029 Well, you've got it exactly backwards. 786 00:44:43,054 --> 00:44:45,734 It's the body 787 00:44:46,181 --> 00:44:49,347 that's inside one big soul. 788 00:44:57,749 --> 00:44:58,930 [KNOCKING ON DOOR] 789 00:44:58,955 --> 00:45:01,455 [DOORKNOBS JIGGLING] 790 00:45:15,055 --> 00:45:17,555 [SOARING, AMBIENT MUSIC] 791 00:45:17,580 --> 00:45:19,622 ♪♪ 792 00:45:24,686 --> 00:45:26,395 Mr. Garbeau, I... 793 00:45:28,362 --> 00:45:31,779 I caught the noble pelican. [EXHALES] 794 00:45:36,946 --> 00:45:39,113 [EXHALES] 795 00:45:40,853 --> 00:45:42,414 You caught that? 796 00:45:42,995 --> 00:45:44,594 Yes. 797 00:45:44,619 --> 00:45:46,305 And then you killed it? 798 00:45:46,554 --> 00:45:48,492 We had a heck of a brawl. 799 00:45:48,779 --> 00:45:50,988 I think I chipped my incisor. 800 00:45:52,844 --> 00:45:54,375 Mr. Garbeau, you... 801 00:45:54,835 --> 00:45:56,726 you once said, 802 00:45:56,727 --> 00:45:59,641 "If you want to achieve greatness... 803 00:46:00,742 --> 00:46:03,484 you're gonna have to make some sacrifices." 804 00:46:03,509 --> 00:46:05,070 So... 805 00:46:08,036 --> 00:46:10,344 [LAUGHS] 806 00:46:20,445 --> 00:46:23,570 Now, this is what true faith looks like. 807 00:46:24,125 --> 00:46:26,023 True faith. 808 00:46:26,436 --> 00:46:27,781 Sir... 809 00:46:34,070 --> 00:46:36,469 What is your name again, son? 810 00:46:37,844 --> 00:46:39,367 Cody. 811 00:46:40,194 --> 00:46:43,312 [LAUGHS NERVOUSLY] Cody Bonar. 812 00:46:45,986 --> 00:46:47,844 Cody Bonar. 813 00:46:48,746 --> 00:46:51,414 [LAUGHS] 814 00:46:51,439 --> 00:46:53,875 I've been waiting for someone like you. 815 00:46:57,584 --> 00:46:58,915 [ROGER] Obie, I don't think that... 816 00:46:58,939 --> 00:47:00,836 Cancel the damn chopper. 817 00:47:04,145 --> 00:47:06,227 [ENYA'S "STORMS IN AFRICA"] 818 00:47:06,228 --> 00:47:08,270 ♪♪ 819 00:47:13,475 --> 00:47:16,475 [LAUGHING] 820 00:47:23,125 --> 00:47:28,319 My friends, this is a world of many masters. 821 00:47:28,602 --> 00:47:29,710 Cody? 822 00:47:29,735 --> 00:47:31,828 [OBIE] Many systems. 823 00:47:32,179 --> 00:47:35,780 Countless people conniving to steal your money 824 00:47:35,805 --> 00:47:37,772 and break your spirit. 825 00:47:38,720 --> 00:47:41,265 Makes a man dizzy sometimes. 826 00:47:44,491 --> 00:47:45,658 Oh. 827 00:47:48,395 --> 00:47:50,046 You keep that dress. 828 00:47:50,071 --> 00:47:51,888 - But, honey... - Oh, you heard Obie. 829 00:47:51,913 --> 00:47:53,272 We're so close. 830 00:47:53,695 --> 00:47:55,616 We just have to work harder. 831 00:47:57,811 --> 00:48:00,319 [OBIE] But if you follow my system, 832 00:48:00,519 --> 00:48:02,679 the Garbeau System, 833 00:48:02,704 --> 00:48:05,905 you serve no one but yourself. 834 00:48:11,019 --> 00:48:13,835 - You do know how to shoot, yeah? - [MAKES SHOOTING NOISE] 835 00:48:14,276 --> 00:48:16,154 Seems pretty intuitive. 836 00:48:29,644 --> 00:48:32,507 [CODY] Krystal! Excuse me. Hey. 837 00:48:34,265 --> 00:48:35,772 Where have you been? 838 00:48:35,797 --> 00:48:39,088 Where to begin? I, uh, I met with Mr. Garbeau, 839 00:48:39,113 --> 00:48:41,186 and we talked man-to-man, 840 00:48:41,211 --> 00:48:43,849 and he asked me to be on his elite security force. 841 00:48:43,874 --> 00:48:46,044 - Gave me a gun and everything. - Jesus Christ, Cody. 842 00:48:46,069 --> 00:48:47,866 - Is that thing loaded? - Yeah. I think so. 843 00:48:47,891 --> 00:48:49,406 I mean, I don't think the bullets are gold, though, 844 00:48:49,430 --> 00:48:51,120 but it's still, still pretty cool, huh? 845 00:48:51,145 --> 00:48:53,036 - Wow. - Yeah. 846 00:48:53,061 --> 00:48:56,084 What can I say? You must've really impressed him. 847 00:48:56,741 --> 00:48:58,647 Yeah, I guess I did. 848 00:49:00,061 --> 00:49:02,725 Did you ever get to show him that Splashercize book? 849 00:49:02,750 --> 00:49:04,083 - Mm-hmm. - Yeah? 850 00:49:04,340 --> 00:49:06,186 Yeah, if he's smart, he'll read it. 851 00:49:06,662 --> 00:49:09,491 Don't worry. Mr. Garbeau and I work closely now. 852 00:49:11,025 --> 00:49:12,483 I'll talk to him. 853 00:49:16,519 --> 00:49:19,935 [ENYA'S "STORMS IN AFRICA"] 854 00:49:19,936 --> 00:49:23,077 ♪♪ 855 00:49:30,769 --> 00:49:33,733 Oftentimes people will ask me, "Obie, 856 00:49:33,758 --> 00:49:36,967 you're a rich man, a handsome man, 857 00:49:36,992 --> 00:49:38,788 the pinnacle of earthly success. 858 00:49:38,813 --> 00:49:41,366 What is it you sell exactly?" 859 00:49:41,391 --> 00:49:43,022 And I look 'em straight in the peepers 860 00:49:43,047 --> 00:49:44,936 and I tell 'em, "Brother, 861 00:49:45,355 --> 00:49:48,241 I sell people back their souls." 862 00:49:48,266 --> 00:49:50,016 ♪♪ 863 00:49:56,103 --> 00:49:59,959 Like the preacher man says, "We all got to serve somebody." 864 00:49:59,984 --> 00:50:02,569 So I want you to ask yourselves, 865 00:50:03,892 --> 00:50:05,491 "Who am I serving?" 866 00:50:07,410 --> 00:50:10,243 "And what did he do with my soul?" 867 00:50:12,248 --> 00:50:13,834 [GROUP CHANTING] Who gets it done? 868 00:50:13,859 --> 00:50:15,192 FAM Washington. 869 00:50:15,217 --> 00:50:17,882 Who gets it done? FAM Washington. 870 00:50:17,907 --> 00:50:19,061 [CHEERING] 871 00:50:19,086 --> 00:50:20,420 Stop tape. 872 00:50:29,487 --> 00:50:32,639 I told you, my heart is just fine. 873 00:50:32,664 --> 00:50:35,397 Without that pacemaker, you could die any moment. 874 00:50:36,251 --> 00:50:38,084 I can live with that. 875 00:50:39,405 --> 00:50:41,452 [TICKING] 876 00:50:41,477 --> 00:50:42,935 [DINGS] 877 00:50:42,936 --> 00:50:45,295 [HUMMING] 878 00:51:12,051 --> 00:51:13,163 Nice tits. 879 00:51:13,648 --> 00:51:17,048 Synced & corrected by QueenMaddie www.addic7ed.com 58548

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