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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:19,358 --> 00:00:21,528 I like this. 2 00:00:21,561 --> 00:00:25,232 I like being friends with you. This is fun. 3 00:00:25,264 --> 00:00:27,867 Come on. Come on. 4 00:00:27,901 --> 00:00:30,838 What? You like this? 5 00:00:30,871 --> 00:00:33,140 - Yes! - You don't like being in a relationship, 6 00:00:33,173 --> 00:00:36,977 - like an official relationship? - Mm... yeah, I did not say that. 7 00:00:37,009 --> 00:00:39,546 Um, I think it's best we don't talk about that. 8 00:00:39,579 --> 00:00:42,582 - We focus on now, me and you. - Okay, let's talk about now. 9 00:00:42,616 --> 00:00:46,353 - Okay. - Now is I don't care about labels. 10 00:00:46,385 --> 00:00:48,454 I don't care what we call ourselves, okay? It's... 11 00:00:48,488 --> 00:00:51,158 No, Nate, it's not about labels. It's just like I don't know 12 00:00:51,190 --> 00:00:53,392 where I'm gonna be a year from now. So... 13 00:00:53,426 --> 00:00:56,096 - What, are you quitting your job? - Maybe. 14 00:00:56,128 --> 00:00:59,232 Maybe I'll, you know, teach English abroad. 15 00:00:59,265 --> 00:01:01,500 - Or I'll join the Peace Corps. - The Peace Corps? 16 00:01:01,534 --> 00:01:05,538 Yes, yes. They need IT people just like everybody else. 17 00:01:05,571 --> 00:01:08,174 Look, I just don't know where I'm gonna be a year from now. 18 00:01:08,208 --> 00:01:12,412 And so I don't want you waiting around for me. It's just not fair to you. 19 00:01:12,445 --> 00:01:18,585 - I don't care. Okay? What I care about is... - Oh. 20 00:01:18,618 --> 00:01:20,421 - Hey, what's up? - Hey. 21 00:01:55,387 --> 00:01:58,925 - You guys? - Yeah? You okay? 22 00:01:58,958 --> 00:02:03,463 You guys? Josh. Josh! 23 00:02:10,337 --> 00:02:12,940 I'm sorry. 24 00:02:19,011 --> 00:02:20,613 I thought you were shitting in there! 25 00:02:20,647 --> 00:02:25,185 Oh, my God! 26 00:02:33,659 --> 00:02:36,295 What? What'd I miss? 27 00:02:36,329 --> 00:02:38,966 Uh, well, we were just saying, um, 28 00:02:38,998 --> 00:02:42,568 if it's a girl, we were thinking of calling her Sarah. 29 00:02:42,601 --> 00:02:45,404 - After Aunt Sarah. - Oh, my God! 30 00:02:45,438 --> 00:02:46,974 - What do you think? - I love it! 31 00:02:47,006 --> 00:02:49,109 - You do? - Yes! 32 00:02:49,141 --> 00:02:50,743 Oh, I think you have the wrong table. 33 00:02:50,777 --> 00:02:52,612 Oh, no, no, you have the right table. 34 00:02:52,645 --> 00:02:54,281 The two glasses are for the gentlemen. 35 00:02:54,313 --> 00:02:56,148 - Jess! No! - Yes, yes, yes. 36 00:02:56,182 --> 00:02:59,286 You can show solidarity with me starting tomorrow. 37 00:02:59,319 --> 00:03:02,389 Tonight we're celebrating your... this isn't about me. 38 00:03:02,421 --> 00:03:05,391 - Yes, please, pour, pour. - Okay, fine, fine, fine. 39 00:03:05,425 --> 00:03:08,061 - But tonight we are paying. - We'll see about that. 40 00:03:08,093 --> 00:03:11,097 No, if she tries to give you her credit card, please do not take it. 41 00:03:11,130 --> 00:03:14,401 No, don't rope her into this! I'm so sorry, we're the worst. 42 00:03:14,433 --> 00:03:17,436 - You're fine. - Oh, but you know what? Um... 43 00:03:17,469 --> 00:03:21,675 I will have a Diet Coke. I'm not drinking tonight. 44 00:03:21,707 --> 00:03:26,112 - Pregnancy. - Oh, my God! Congratulations! 45 00:03:26,146 --> 00:03:29,082 What? Oh, oh, she's not gonna tell anyone. 46 00:03:29,115 --> 00:03:32,152 - Look, don't tell anyone. - I'm very trustworthy. 47 00:03:32,184 --> 00:03:35,555 No, no, I just don't want to tell anyone until, like, the third trimester. 48 00:03:35,587 --> 00:03:39,291 Okay. You know what? It's my bad. We can wait until the kid's first birthday 49 00:03:39,325 --> 00:03:41,228 to tell people, it'll be your call. I'm sorry. 50 00:03:41,260 --> 00:03:43,562 - It's fine. I'm sorry. - This is very sweet. 51 00:03:43,595 --> 00:03:47,700 My siblings would never include me in this type of thing. 52 00:03:47,734 --> 00:03:51,438 - Oh, they... - We're actually not siblings. 53 00:03:51,470 --> 00:03:54,408 They're the new parents. I'm just the vessel. 54 00:03:54,440 --> 00:03:57,343 Ew! No. Oh, my gosh. We are not using the word "vessel." 55 00:03:57,377 --> 00:04:00,546 - That's a little... - Oh, my God. I'm so sorry. 56 00:04:00,580 --> 00:04:02,449 You guys, dessert's gonna be on us. 57 00:04:02,481 --> 00:04:04,193 - No! You don't have to do that! - You don't have to do that. 58 00:04:04,217 --> 00:04:06,537 - No, seriously. I'm an asshole. - No, you're totally fine! 59 00:04:08,688 --> 00:04:11,158 So they're not paying you? 60 00:04:11,190 --> 00:04:16,128 First of all, it is illegal to pay for surrogacy in New York. 61 00:04:16,162 --> 00:04:18,532 Second of all, no, that would be weird! 62 00:04:18,565 --> 00:04:21,676 It's funny, I'm already getting comments from people saying I'm doing it for money. 63 00:04:21,700 --> 00:04:24,804 I'm like, no, are you crazy? There's so many other ways to make money. 64 00:04:24,837 --> 00:04:28,474 - Hm... - I'm doing this because I want to. 65 00:04:28,508 --> 00:04:33,080 And because Josh and Aaron deserve... 66 00:04:33,113 --> 00:04:37,584 - So was I the last to know? - No. No, no. Um... 67 00:04:37,616 --> 00:04:41,087 When I say "people," I mean Jocelyn. 68 00:04:41,121 --> 00:04:45,224 Before I called you and Dad, I talked to Jocelyn, that's it. 69 00:04:45,258 --> 00:04:48,662 And they are reimbursing me for every copay, 70 00:04:48,695 --> 00:04:54,166 every piece of maternity wear, every prenatal vitamin, even food. 71 00:04:54,200 --> 00:04:58,637 - It's all in the contract. - Good. 72 00:04:58,671 --> 00:05:01,440 I mean, it's not a contract, it's an agreement. 73 00:05:01,474 --> 00:05:04,678 But we're being very by-the-book. We each have lawyers. 74 00:05:04,710 --> 00:05:08,549 - Yeah, and they're gonna be great dads. - Okay. 75 00:05:10,349 --> 00:05:13,352 - And you're feeling good? - Mm-hm. Mm-hm. 76 00:05:13,385 --> 00:05:15,588 I feel great. I have no nausea. 77 00:05:15,621 --> 00:05:17,223 - Do you know how lucky you are? - Yes. 78 00:05:17,257 --> 00:05:18,658 I couldn't stop throwing up. 79 00:05:18,690 --> 00:05:20,893 My morning sickness was so bad 80 00:05:20,926 --> 00:05:23,863 I was worried the two of you weren't getting enough nutrients. 81 00:05:23,897 --> 00:05:26,700 I know, Mom, you've told us a million times. 82 00:05:26,733 --> 00:05:29,236 - Yeah. - Well... 83 00:05:29,269 --> 00:05:32,772 Now, as life-changing as a fiction writing class can be, 84 00:05:32,804 --> 00:05:37,710 we want to offer, um, a broader range of skills 85 00:05:37,743 --> 00:05:41,181 to help these women in the job market once they've been released. 86 00:05:41,214 --> 00:05:43,250 Now, the largest roadblock to that... 87 00:05:43,282 --> 00:05:45,919 - It isn't allowed in prison. - Yes, exactly. 88 00:05:45,952 --> 00:05:50,824 Um, so that's why we're interested in hiring a team of developers 89 00:05:50,856 --> 00:05:54,426 to customize software that would simulate the internet. 90 00:05:54,460 --> 00:05:56,539 - Hm. - Which we currently don't have the budget for. 91 00:05:56,563 --> 00:05:59,432 I follow. I was thinking, why do you need us? 92 00:05:59,464 --> 00:06:01,368 Tell me more. 93 00:06:20,286 --> 00:06:22,822 Absolutely. And I've tried to partner with them, 94 00:06:22,854 --> 00:06:25,624 and it's just not something that they're interested in. 95 00:06:25,657 --> 00:06:30,597 They only serve men and this is already a male-dominated field. 96 00:06:35,767 --> 00:06:38,571 But you know what? We got really close. That's great. 97 00:06:38,604 --> 00:06:41,517 Next time we'll be closer. I mean, there are so many other potential donors 98 00:06:41,541 --> 00:06:46,947 - who'd be into this. - Jess, Jess. I'm so sorry, but this is not your job. 99 00:06:46,979 --> 00:06:50,383 I think this is a good opportunity for you to refocus. 100 00:06:50,416 --> 00:06:52,819 This project is a great, great idea, 101 00:06:52,851 --> 00:06:59,258 but I think for now it's best if we focus on the basics of what we do. 102 00:06:59,291 --> 00:07:03,462 We're not where I'd like us to be in terms of the gala. 103 00:07:03,496 --> 00:07:06,765 - Okay. - Have you sent out the "save the date" email? 104 00:07:06,799 --> 00:07:09,870 I will do that right now. 105 00:07:10,969 --> 00:07:12,306 Yeah. 106 00:07:20,779 --> 00:07:26,452 - Hey, we can just order food. - No, this'll take me like two seconds. 107 00:07:26,486 --> 00:07:29,456 Okay, just don't make it like a whole production. 108 00:07:29,488 --> 00:07:32,825 - Oh, some people just say, "Thank you, Jess." - Thank you, Jess. 109 00:07:32,859 --> 00:07:37,597 - Huh. - Hey, how's, um, Nate? 110 00:07:37,630 --> 00:07:40,467 - Um... - Oh, okay. You don't have to talk about it 111 00:07:40,500 --> 00:07:44,371 - if you don't want to. - No, no, you're fine. Um... 112 00:07:44,404 --> 00:07:48,475 He clearly wants to get married, and I don't think it's that kind of a relationship. 113 00:07:48,508 --> 00:07:51,478 - No, I think he's great. - He is great, he's just boring. 114 00:07:51,510 --> 00:07:54,948 You don't understand, babe. Jess is only attracted to emotionally unavailable men. 115 00:07:54,981 --> 00:07:58,418 Uh, false. I'm also attracted to men who live in different cities from me. 116 00:07:58,450 --> 00:08:02,921 Yeah, right, right. Geographically unavailable men. 117 00:08:02,955 --> 00:08:06,625 How far along are you? 118 00:08:06,659 --> 00:08:10,363 - I am 32 weeks. - Oh, my God! 119 00:08:10,395 --> 00:08:12,464 - Congratulations! - Thank you. What about you? 120 00:08:12,498 --> 00:08:14,933 - Um, ten weeks. - Oh. 121 00:08:14,967 --> 00:08:17,437 But it's not mine. 122 00:08:17,469 --> 00:08:20,773 Biologically... biologically it is. 123 00:08:20,806 --> 00:08:23,075 But I... 124 00:08:23,109 --> 00:08:27,746 I'm a surrogate for my two best friends. 125 00:08:27,779 --> 00:08:30,916 Oh. Wow. That's really cool. 126 00:08:30,950 --> 00:08:34,321 - I could never do that. - Oh, you know, people say that all the time. 127 00:08:34,353 --> 00:08:36,655 But I'm like, no, I think you could. 128 00:08:36,688 --> 00:08:41,394 I mean, I don't know you. But I feel like anyone could. 129 00:08:41,427 --> 00:08:43,430 Wow. 130 00:08:52,972 --> 00:08:57,376 - Sorry. - No, we're totally fine. 131 00:08:57,409 --> 00:08:59,913 We are gonna be late. 132 00:09:04,116 --> 00:09:09,088 The test came back positive for Down syndrome. Trisomy 21. 133 00:09:09,121 --> 00:09:12,659 As I mentioned, the test is 99 percent accurate. 134 00:09:12,692 --> 00:09:16,496 False positives are extremely rare. 135 00:09:16,529 --> 00:09:22,000 I have a genetic counselor I can recommend who can guide you through your options. 136 00:09:22,034 --> 00:09:25,672 I can also give you the information of a great community center 137 00:09:25,704 --> 00:09:29,075 if you want to learn more about Down syndrome. 138 00:09:31,810 --> 00:09:34,513 There's nothing you did that caused this, 139 00:09:34,547 --> 00:09:40,053 and we have no reason to believe at this point that the fetus isn't perfectly healthy. 140 00:09:40,086 --> 00:09:42,688 It just has an extra chromosome. 141 00:09:44,924 --> 00:09:47,025 If you want to get pregnant again in the future, 142 00:09:47,058 --> 00:09:49,895 we have no reason to believe that you're any more likely 143 00:09:49,928 --> 00:09:53,866 than anyone else to have another child with Down syndrome. 144 00:09:57,770 --> 00:10:01,441 Now, do you have any questions for me? 145 00:10:32,871 --> 00:10:35,707 Josh, you okay in there? 146 00:10:45,550 --> 00:10:47,453 Josh? 147 00:10:48,821 --> 00:10:52,459 - How you doing? - Hey. 148 00:10:55,595 --> 00:10:59,632 You know you've been in there for like 45 minutes, right? 149 00:10:59,664 --> 00:11:05,871 - Oh. I have? - Yeah. You're gonna be pruney. 150 00:11:18,083 --> 00:11:22,054 Aaron's on his way back. Do you want to get something for dinner? 151 00:11:22,087 --> 00:11:26,525 - I'm not hungry. - Well, you have to eat something. 152 00:11:27,659 --> 00:11:30,195 Do you think I came across, like...? 153 00:11:30,228 --> 00:11:32,898 What? 154 00:11:32,932 --> 00:11:35,268 Like I actively wanted him to go to work 155 00:11:35,300 --> 00:11:37,102 because I didn't want him around today? 156 00:11:37,135 --> 00:11:40,573 - No, no. - I just don't want to be a burden. 157 00:11:40,606 --> 00:11:42,075 I feel like I've been so much to... 158 00:11:42,107 --> 00:11:44,943 No. Hey, you're not a burden. 159 00:11:44,976 --> 00:11:47,746 I just, like, I want him to be able to process, 160 00:11:47,779 --> 00:11:50,283 you know, without feeling like he's... you know. 161 00:11:50,316 --> 00:11:53,587 Yeah. 162 00:11:59,025 --> 00:12:03,996 Oh... 163 00:12:09,068 --> 00:12:11,571 - Hi. - Hi. 164 00:12:11,603 --> 00:12:15,240 - Hey, can we talk later? - What's wrong? 165 00:12:15,274 --> 00:12:18,512 Nothing. Uh... 166 00:12:20,579 --> 00:12:23,883 Josh, are you there? 167 00:12:26,718 --> 00:12:30,991 We can talk later. Just tell me why you're upset. 168 00:12:39,765 --> 00:12:41,867 Hey, Jodi, this is Jess. 169 00:12:41,900 --> 00:12:45,604 Jess. Hi, dear. What's going on? 170 00:12:45,638 --> 00:12:48,241 We just got some news today. 171 00:13:22,875 --> 00:13:27,679 I hate the lines. I think they need to be more prominent. 172 00:13:27,712 --> 00:13:29,716 - Okay. Sure. - Thicker, maybe? 173 00:13:29,749 --> 00:13:33,153 And the color... I don't know. 174 00:13:45,398 --> 00:13:51,004 - Did you guys sleep last night? - Sort of. 175 00:13:55,006 --> 00:13:58,276 Jess? Josh and Aaron! Oh, my God! 176 00:13:58,309 --> 00:14:02,414 - Dave and Kevin! - Alex just told us the good news. Mazel tov! 177 00:14:02,448 --> 00:14:07,053 - Oh, thank you. We're excited. - It's really exciting. 178 00:14:07,086 --> 00:14:09,322 - What week is it? - Uh, 13. 179 00:14:09,355 --> 00:14:12,392 - Oh, wow. - Do we know the gender yet? 180 00:14:12,424 --> 00:14:14,993 - Not yet. - Oh. 181 00:14:15,026 --> 00:14:17,996 Don't ask that. That is... It's just so insane 182 00:14:18,029 --> 00:14:19,799 that we even gender at birth, right? 183 00:14:19,832 --> 00:14:22,168 Yeah. Totally. Um... 184 00:14:22,201 --> 00:14:26,172 Well, it was really good to see you guys. I hope you're doing well. 185 00:14:26,204 --> 00:14:29,275 Oh, yeah, totally. Likewise. And... 186 00:14:29,308 --> 00:14:32,779 - We'll just... - Yeah. How about we see if there's a table outside. 187 00:14:32,812 --> 00:14:34,714 - We were gonna... - We were gonna sit outside. 188 00:14:34,746 --> 00:14:36,782 - Oh, great. - Okay, enjoy. 189 00:14:36,816 --> 00:14:39,753 - See you. Bye. - Good seeing you. 190 00:14:53,765 --> 00:14:58,170 So are you guys gonna go to that community center that Nadine mentioned? 191 00:14:58,203 --> 00:15:02,074 Um... I don't know. We haven't really talked about it yet. 192 00:15:02,107 --> 00:15:06,445 I, um... I mean, I knew somebody with Down syndrome growing up, so... 193 00:15:06,478 --> 00:15:09,848 - You did? - I don't really... yeah. My friend Kelsey's brother. 194 00:15:09,881 --> 00:15:15,987 Oh. Well, um, aren't you curious to get a sense of the community here? 195 00:15:16,020 --> 00:15:20,226 Uh, yeah. We were just... We have to find out when they're open. 196 00:15:20,259 --> 00:15:23,096 It's every afternoon except Sunday. 197 00:15:23,129 --> 00:15:25,231 Mm-hm. 198 00:15:27,232 --> 00:15:30,035 - Hi. - Hi. 199 00:15:30,068 --> 00:15:32,472 - Hi, sorry. Can I help you? - I'm Jess. 200 00:15:32,505 --> 00:15:35,308 - I called you earlier. - Oh, right. Oh, Jess. 201 00:15:35,341 --> 00:15:37,909 - Yes, thank you. Thank you for coming. - Hi. 202 00:15:37,943 --> 00:15:40,212 - And, uh, you're Aaron. Right? - Uh, Josh. 203 00:15:40,246 --> 00:15:43,348 - Oh, Josh. Nice to meet you. Welcome. - Nice to meet you. 204 00:15:43,381 --> 00:15:47,319 An activity session just started, actually, so let's... Oh, hey. 205 00:15:47,352 --> 00:15:49,789 - This is Malik. - Hi, Malik, I'm Jess. 206 00:15:49,822 --> 00:15:52,924 - Hi. - Jess. Josh. He's a great singer. 207 00:15:52,957 --> 00:15:54,993 Bye, Malik. 208 00:15:55,026 --> 00:15:57,796 - Okay, so just this way. - Okay. 209 00:16:17,917 --> 00:16:20,954 Hi. 210 00:16:26,257 --> 00:16:28,293 What are you guys playing with? 211 00:16:28,327 --> 00:16:30,462 Yeah. 212 00:16:31,329 --> 00:16:33,098 You wanna...? 213 00:16:35,034 --> 00:16:38,303 You put it in here and then... 214 00:16:41,472 --> 00:16:43,543 I don't know. 215 00:16:46,245 --> 00:16:48,181 Hey! 216 00:16:48,213 --> 00:16:50,949 Hey! What's your name? 217 00:16:50,982 --> 00:16:53,886 Hey, Leon. Can I look in there? 218 00:16:55,520 --> 00:16:57,990 Wait, where am I? 219 00:16:58,023 --> 00:16:59,425 Oh! 220 00:17:00,558 --> 00:17:02,562 Oh, man, you're taking me away! 221 00:17:02,595 --> 00:17:04,430 You're taking me away! 222 00:17:04,462 --> 00:17:06,099 What? Okay. 223 00:17:11,536 --> 00:17:14,105 Leon! 224 00:17:14,139 --> 00:17:17,310 What's all this money on the floor? 225 00:17:18,643 --> 00:17:21,146 There he is! 226 00:17:30,488 --> 00:17:32,991 Wesley, where's yellow? 227 00:17:33,025 --> 00:17:36,195 - Ah! - Where's yellow? 228 00:17:39,331 --> 00:17:41,400 Give me five! 229 00:17:43,002 --> 00:17:45,404 Oh! Are you okay? 230 00:17:45,437 --> 00:17:50,176 - Where? - You can give me five. Yeah. 231 00:17:50,208 --> 00:17:54,447 V! Another easy one. 232 00:17:54,479 --> 00:17:57,249 W! 233 00:17:57,283 --> 00:18:00,419 - Here we go. - X! 234 00:18:00,451 --> 00:18:03,188 - Yes, exactly, X! - Good job. 235 00:18:03,221 --> 00:18:05,657 Y! 236 00:18:05,690 --> 00:18:07,959 And for a Z, you just draw a Z. 237 00:18:07,993 --> 00:18:12,063 Z! 238 00:18:12,096 --> 00:18:15,166 And then now... 239 00:18:19,204 --> 00:18:22,642 Hi, hi. How's it going? 240 00:18:22,675 --> 00:18:25,645 - Hi, Patrick. - Hi. I'm Jess. 241 00:18:25,678 --> 00:18:27,313 Hi, I'm Rachel. Nice to meet you. 242 00:18:27,345 --> 00:18:29,347 - Josh. - Josh, hi. Sandra. 243 00:18:29,380 --> 00:18:31,918 - I'm Jess. - Sandra. I... 244 00:18:31,950 --> 00:18:34,120 - Excuse us. - Bye, nice to see you. 245 00:18:34,152 --> 00:18:38,591 - Bye. - My son used to come here, but, you know, he's grown now. 246 00:18:38,623 --> 00:18:41,928 But you, uh... you don't wanna get rid of him, do you? 247 00:18:41,960 --> 00:18:44,063 - No. - No, okay. Good to see you. 248 00:18:44,095 --> 00:18:45,563 - Yeah. - You're here. 249 00:18:45,596 --> 00:18:47,632 - Preggers? - Uh, yes, I am. 250 00:18:47,666 --> 00:18:49,669 - Congratulations. - I will actually... thank you. 251 00:18:49,701 --> 00:18:52,938 - I'll let you guys get caught up and I'll be right back. - Yeah, sure. 252 00:18:52,971 --> 00:18:54,472 Thanks. 253 00:18:54,505 --> 00:18:57,476 - Hey. Hey! - Hi. 254 00:18:57,508 --> 00:19:00,278 Um, I just want to tell you I love your dress. 255 00:19:00,312 --> 00:19:03,649 - Oh, thanks. - Where did you get it from? 256 00:19:03,681 --> 00:19:06,051 We can't... we have to leave this here. 257 00:19:06,084 --> 00:19:08,219 Play with it... I know. Okay, two more times. 258 00:19:08,253 --> 00:19:11,691 - I think this is vintage. - Oh, that's amazing. 259 00:19:11,724 --> 00:19:13,993 - Did you get it here? - No, Chicago. 260 00:19:14,025 --> 00:19:16,304 Oh, of course. All the stores here are so picked over, right? 261 00:19:16,328 --> 00:19:18,097 Leon, honey, this has to stay here. 262 00:19:18,130 --> 00:19:20,232 - Hey! - Let's go, my love. Let's go. 263 00:19:20,265 --> 00:19:21,734 We'll do it next time. Out the door. 264 00:19:21,766 --> 00:19:25,236 Bye, Leon! I'm Jess. It was really great to meet you! 265 00:19:25,269 --> 00:19:28,273 Bye, nice to see you, Leon! 266 00:19:29,574 --> 00:19:31,643 It was really nice to meet you. Thank you. 267 00:19:31,677 --> 00:19:34,513 Yeah, anytime. Just give me an email, give me a shout. 268 00:19:34,545 --> 00:19:36,582 Actually, I think we have time for coffee. 269 00:19:36,614 --> 00:19:38,984 - Is there a coffee shop somewhere nearby? - Sure. 270 00:19:39,017 --> 00:19:40,518 - Uh... okay? - That's a great idea. 271 00:19:40,552 --> 00:19:42,053 - Yeah. - You're good with people? 272 00:19:42,086 --> 00:19:43,755 I am, yeah, yeah. Go, go, go. 273 00:19:43,788 --> 00:19:48,660 Well, Jason's... he's in this program at UCLA, 274 00:19:48,694 --> 00:19:54,767 which is great, but it's... it's really hard not having him around. 275 00:19:54,800 --> 00:19:58,704 He's... he's just my Zen master, he's... 276 00:19:58,736 --> 00:20:01,140 He just reminds me to smell the flowers. 277 00:20:01,172 --> 00:20:03,708 He's like, "Here, smell this flower." 278 00:20:03,742 --> 00:20:05,711 You know, not having him here, it's... 279 00:20:05,744 --> 00:20:08,714 Oh, I just... I'm just relapsing into old habits. 280 00:20:08,746 --> 00:20:11,150 I'm sorry, I'm talking your ear off. 281 00:20:11,182 --> 00:20:14,052 No, no. What about your old habits? 282 00:20:14,085 --> 00:20:16,588 Oh, just old anxieties. 283 00:20:16,621 --> 00:20:20,458 I just... I was raised in this very competitive household, 284 00:20:20,492 --> 00:20:23,195 I went to Princeton for like three consecutive programs. 285 00:20:23,227 --> 00:20:25,563 I mean, just imagine this pressure cooker, 286 00:20:25,596 --> 00:20:27,599 and all these people running around terrified, 287 00:20:27,632 --> 00:20:29,668 really having to prove how smart they are. 288 00:20:29,700 --> 00:20:33,706 - My mom is a dean at Yale, so... - So, okay, you know. You know. 289 00:20:33,738 --> 00:20:37,142 All right. So then Jason, he just... 290 00:20:37,176 --> 00:20:39,311 He just... 291 00:20:39,343 --> 00:20:41,813 He just snapped me right out of it, yeah. 292 00:20:41,846 --> 00:20:45,116 He... he just... 293 00:20:45,150 --> 00:20:49,022 He just taught me everything... everything. 294 00:20:50,522 --> 00:20:53,726 Really realigned. Taught me everything. 295 00:20:53,758 --> 00:20:56,161 Yeah. I'm... 296 00:20:56,195 --> 00:20:57,630 That sounds really New Agey. 297 00:20:57,662 --> 00:21:00,498 Oh, Josh and I met at Sarah Lawrence. 298 00:21:00,532 --> 00:21:03,535 - Oh! Oh. - Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. 299 00:21:03,569 --> 00:21:06,672 The hardest part of this pregnancy has been not drinking kombucha. 300 00:21:06,705 --> 00:21:08,775 Yeah. No, no, no. 301 00:21:46,611 --> 00:21:50,615 Hey. Hey, what's up? Is everything okay? 302 00:21:54,152 --> 00:21:57,890 - How's your mom? - Mm... 303 00:21:57,922 --> 00:22:00,758 Um... 304 00:22:00,792 --> 00:22:03,329 I've been avoiding her. 305 00:22:05,229 --> 00:22:08,833 No need to stress her out, you know? 306 00:22:08,867 --> 00:22:12,138 By that I mean no need to stress me out with her stress. 307 00:22:12,170 --> 00:22:14,172 Mm-hm. 308 00:22:16,909 --> 00:22:20,412 Have you been in touch with your friend Kelsey? 309 00:22:21,947 --> 00:22:24,150 Because of her brother with Down syndrome? 310 00:22:24,182 --> 00:22:28,219 - Mm-hm. - Mm... 311 00:22:28,253 --> 00:22:32,691 No, her... her brother died years ago. 312 00:22:32,724 --> 00:22:34,927 - Fuck. - Yeah. 313 00:22:34,959 --> 00:22:36,394 What was his name? 314 00:22:37,862 --> 00:22:40,565 Devon. 315 00:22:40,599 --> 00:22:43,869 Did you have a relationship with him? 316 00:22:43,901 --> 00:22:46,804 He wasn't really somebody you could have a relationship with. 317 00:22:46,838 --> 00:22:49,175 What does that mean? 318 00:22:49,207 --> 00:22:52,378 He didn't seem to know whether you were in the room with him or not. 319 00:22:52,410 --> 00:22:56,314 I'm sure he was aware of your presence, even if he couldn't show it. 320 00:22:56,348 --> 00:23:00,353 - You never met this person, Jess. - Yeah, but... 321 00:23:01,986 --> 00:23:05,190 Okay. You're right. 322 00:23:11,662 --> 00:23:14,799 Aaron was saying... 323 00:23:14,832 --> 00:23:20,672 he doesn't know if we can afford it. 324 00:23:20,706 --> 00:23:22,808 I mean, having a kid with Down syndrome, 325 00:23:22,841 --> 00:23:27,179 it requires a lot. 326 00:23:28,280 --> 00:23:31,917 Okay. Um... 327 00:23:31,949 --> 00:23:34,852 - So are you saying...? - I don't know. 328 00:23:34,886 --> 00:23:40,492 It's like nothing... nothing feels like the right decision. 329 00:23:40,525 --> 00:23:45,296 - I don't know. I don't know. - Okay, you don't have to know right now. 330 00:23:45,330 --> 00:23:47,300 It's only week 13. 331 00:23:58,610 --> 00:24:00,446 Oh... 332 00:24:34,746 --> 00:24:36,915 - Thanks for coming. It was a good turnout. - Yeah. 333 00:24:36,948 --> 00:24:40,451 - Nice harmonizing, by the way. - Oh, thank you. 334 00:24:40,485 --> 00:24:43,022 I wanted to tell you we're having a party here on the 21st. 335 00:24:43,054 --> 00:24:44,457 - Okay. - So... 336 00:24:47,092 --> 00:24:48,794 - Hey. - Hey. 337 00:24:48,826 --> 00:24:50,561 I'm going this way too. 338 00:24:50,594 --> 00:24:52,630 Sorry, remind me of your name? 339 00:24:52,663 --> 00:24:55,433 I'm Jess. And you're Bridget, right? 340 00:24:55,467 --> 00:24:57,602 - And Leon? - Good memory. 341 00:24:57,636 --> 00:24:59,705 Thanks. 342 00:24:59,737 --> 00:25:02,707 - So what do you do? - Mommy, look. 343 00:25:02,740 --> 00:25:06,844 Look at these bubbles. 344 00:25:06,878 --> 00:25:09,648 - Um, what do I... - Yeah, what do you do? 345 00:25:09,680 --> 00:25:11,350 - For a living? - Uh-huh. 346 00:25:11,382 --> 00:25:13,986 Oh. I, um... I run a catering business. 347 00:25:14,018 --> 00:25:16,988 - Oh, awesome. - How about you? 348 00:25:17,022 --> 00:25:21,460 I work for a nonprofit that provides classes for incarcerated women. 349 00:25:21,493 --> 00:25:24,996 - Wow. - Yeah, I'm basically just a glorified social media manager. 350 00:25:25,030 --> 00:25:28,701 And so are you volunteering at the center? 351 00:25:28,734 --> 00:25:32,538 Oh, um, I'm actually just here for information. I'm pregnant. 352 00:25:32,571 --> 00:25:35,341 I'm a surrogate for my two best friends. 353 00:25:35,373 --> 00:25:38,476 - And, um... - That guy you were with last time? 354 00:25:38,509 --> 00:25:43,548 Yeah, yeah. But I'd love to talk to you some more about everything, 355 00:25:43,582 --> 00:25:45,684 if you maybe have time for coffee sometime? 356 00:25:45,717 --> 00:25:48,420 - Well, I'm trying to quit caffeine. - Oh! 357 00:25:49,787 --> 00:25:52,390 Do you remember that kid Leon? 358 00:25:52,423 --> 00:25:56,027 - No. - One of the kids from the community center? 359 00:25:56,061 --> 00:26:00,432 Oh, okay. Yeah, I don't remember their names. 360 00:26:00,465 --> 00:26:03,101 I actually went back there today. 361 00:26:03,134 --> 00:26:05,903 Aaron, you gotta come. This kid is amazing. 362 00:26:05,937 --> 00:26:07,906 - Yeah? - Wait. You went back? 363 00:26:07,938 --> 00:26:09,440 Yeah, I just wanted to. 364 00:26:09,474 --> 00:26:11,476 And I knew you two couldn't take off work. 365 00:26:11,509 --> 00:26:14,612 Plus, I just feel like personally I had a lot 366 00:26:14,646 --> 00:26:18,851 of preconceived notions and so it's good to be there and be like, "Oh!" 367 00:26:18,883 --> 00:26:23,654 I was reading one of the books that the midwife recommended, 368 00:26:23,688 --> 00:26:26,792 and in it, it talks about how until pretty recently it was the norm 369 00:26:26,824 --> 00:26:29,861 to institutionalize children with Down syndrome. 370 00:26:29,894 --> 00:26:33,064 And in those institutions, they didn't teach them to read or write. 371 00:26:33,098 --> 00:26:35,534 They just assumed that they couldn't. 372 00:26:35,566 --> 00:26:38,803 And so a lot of those kids grew up to have problems 373 00:26:38,836 --> 00:26:40,772 because of how they were raised. 374 00:26:40,805 --> 00:26:44,409 And there was a ton of horrific abuse going on. 375 00:26:44,442 --> 00:26:48,413 And that was true for pretty much everyone with Down syndrome. 376 00:26:48,447 --> 00:26:51,582 And then in the '70s, there was this incredible mom 377 00:26:51,615 --> 00:26:53,584 who just did not accept those limitations. 378 00:26:53,618 --> 00:26:57,790 She... she assumed that her son could read if he was taught, 379 00:26:57,823 --> 00:27:00,993 and she was right. 380 00:27:01,025 --> 00:27:03,861 And that one story, that changed the whole community, 381 00:27:03,894 --> 00:27:08,466 and how they perceived, you know, what was possible. 382 00:27:08,499 --> 00:27:10,736 - It was amazing. You guys should read it. - Mm. 383 00:27:10,768 --> 00:27:13,772 Yeah, that's super interesting. 384 00:27:15,673 --> 00:27:18,109 - Uh, dinner's ready. - Okay. 385 00:27:18,142 --> 00:27:21,079 - Aaron. - Mm, looks good. 386 00:27:37,629 --> 00:27:39,465 Water. 387 00:27:39,497 --> 00:27:42,601 Um... this. 388 00:27:47,973 --> 00:27:50,075 Can I? 389 00:27:55,045 --> 00:27:57,816 - Take that? - Thank you. 390 00:28:00,150 --> 00:28:02,053 Bon appetit. 391 00:28:04,155 --> 00:28:06,091 Thanks, man. 392 00:28:07,993 --> 00:28:10,229 Mm. 393 00:28:10,262 --> 00:28:13,899 - This is so good. Thank you. - I'm glad you like it. 394 00:28:20,138 --> 00:28:24,810 Mm. You know, it would be really cool if we could hang out with Leon's family. 395 00:28:24,842 --> 00:28:27,144 He has the most amazing mom. 396 00:28:27,178 --> 00:28:29,715 Sure. Maybe. 397 00:28:29,747 --> 00:28:32,851 I mean, I was thinking maybe this week. 398 00:28:55,806 --> 00:28:58,676 Hey, Bridget. I'm so sorry to bug you. 399 00:28:58,709 --> 00:29:03,180 Um, but I just wanted to know if you wanted to get together this weekend. 400 00:29:03,214 --> 00:29:06,618 Um, I'm more than happy to come to your neighborhood 401 00:29:06,650 --> 00:29:11,055 or I can meet you on your lunch break, whatever is easiest for you. 402 00:29:11,089 --> 00:29:14,159 Just let me know. Okay, bye. 403 00:29:22,734 --> 00:29:24,537 Oh, this is it. 404 00:29:29,140 --> 00:29:31,310 - Hey. Hi, come on in. - Hey! 405 00:29:31,342 --> 00:29:32,744 - Thank you. - Hi. 406 00:29:32,776 --> 00:29:34,178 - Hi, I'm Josh. - Bridget. 407 00:29:34,211 --> 00:29:35,222 - It's nice to meet you. - Hi, nice to meet you. 408 00:29:35,246 --> 00:29:36,715 - Aaron. - Hi, Bridget. 409 00:29:36,747 --> 00:29:38,058 - Come on in. - Thanks for having us. 410 00:29:38,082 --> 00:29:40,151 - Absolutely. - Oh! Hey! 411 00:29:40,185 --> 00:29:43,188 Um, I know you said not to bring anything, but... 412 00:29:43,220 --> 00:29:45,323 Oh, thank you. 413 00:29:45,357 --> 00:29:47,859 Um, do you guys have chocolate? 414 00:29:47,891 --> 00:29:49,260 Do you have a dietary restriction? 415 00:29:49,294 --> 00:29:51,630 No, no, I just... 416 00:29:51,662 --> 00:29:55,132 - Oh, yes, I'm so sorry. - No, no, it's fine. Thank you. 417 00:29:55,166 --> 00:29:56,935 - Hey. - Hi! 418 00:29:56,967 --> 00:29:59,137 - Hey, I'm Dan. - Josh. Thank you for having us. 419 00:29:59,169 --> 00:30:01,340 - Hey, Aaron. Hi. - Aaron, nice to meet you. 420 00:30:01,372 --> 00:30:04,709 - Hey, I'm Jess. - Jess! Hey. 421 00:30:04,743 --> 00:30:07,044 - Hey! - You are too heavy for this. 422 00:30:07,078 --> 00:30:09,181 Say hi. You wanna give him a hug? 423 00:30:09,214 --> 00:30:13,385 - Hi. How are you? - Aw! 424 00:30:13,418 --> 00:30:17,789 - Nice to meet you. - Do you wanna give Aaron a hug? 425 00:30:17,822 --> 00:30:20,958 - Come. - Sure. Where are we going, man? 426 00:30:20,992 --> 00:30:24,930 - You guys want anything to drink? - Um, what are you having? 427 00:30:24,963 --> 00:30:26,632 - Seltzer. - I'll have seltzer also. 428 00:30:26,665 --> 00:30:28,066 - Seltzer? - What are you having? 429 00:30:28,099 --> 00:30:30,369 Beer. Yeah, Josh? 430 00:30:30,401 --> 00:30:34,305 Oh, uh, yeah. Just a water or whatever you're... 431 00:30:34,339 --> 00:30:36,642 - Whatever you guys are having. - You sure? 432 00:30:36,675 --> 00:30:39,177 - Yeah. - Have a beer, come on. 433 00:30:39,209 --> 00:30:41,178 - You're having a beer? - Don't peer pressure him. 434 00:30:41,211 --> 00:30:43,814 - Yeah. Yeah, I'll have a beer. - Okay. 435 00:30:43,848 --> 00:30:45,225 - Oh, thank you. - They're twist-off. 436 00:30:45,249 --> 00:30:47,718 - Okay. - He's sharing the blueberries? 437 00:30:47,752 --> 00:30:50,956 - I love it. - Yeah. 438 00:30:50,988 --> 00:30:53,057 Oh, thank you. Thank you so much. 439 00:30:58,862 --> 00:31:03,168 Yeah? You wanna come out and join us out here? 440 00:31:03,200 --> 00:31:05,202 - What's up? - No, thank you. 441 00:31:05,236 --> 00:31:06,938 "No thank you" on the orange? 442 00:31:06,970 --> 00:31:09,807 - Okay, manners. - I'm gonna try this. 443 00:31:09,841 --> 00:31:12,343 - You want cheese? Okay. - Yes. 444 00:31:12,377 --> 00:31:16,415 - I'm gonna make this a little... - Oh, okay. Ooh! Okay. 445 00:31:16,448 --> 00:31:18,283 - Look at this. - Mini pizza. 446 00:31:18,315 --> 00:31:21,352 - Happy birthday. - Happy birthday to you! 447 00:31:21,386 --> 00:31:24,122 - Thank you! - Happy birthday. 448 00:31:24,155 --> 00:31:26,792 - Is it his birthday? - No. 449 00:31:26,824 --> 00:31:29,928 - It's not his birthday. - He's just joking. 450 00:31:29,960 --> 00:31:31,697 It's everybody's birthday. 451 00:31:31,729 --> 00:31:34,098 What? You want a drink? 452 00:31:34,131 --> 00:31:35,734 - I need this. - You need this? 453 00:31:35,766 --> 00:31:37,468 Another one? Can you eat this one first? 454 00:31:37,502 --> 00:31:41,473 - Okay. - Okay. Thank you. 455 00:31:41,505 --> 00:31:47,411 Well, the food is great. I mean, Ina Garten would be so lucky to get invited here. 456 00:31:47,445 --> 00:31:50,314 - Bridget hates Ina Garten. - I don't hate her. 457 00:31:50,348 --> 00:31:54,019 I think the whole barefoot thing is a little forced. 458 00:31:54,052 --> 00:31:55,821 - Okay. - She's a little uptight. 459 00:31:55,853 --> 00:31:57,322 - Yeah, okay. - For shoes off. 460 00:31:57,354 --> 00:32:00,092 - And the name Ina. - And the name Ina? 461 00:32:00,124 --> 00:32:02,193 It makes me uncomfortable. 462 00:32:02,226 --> 00:32:06,465 Anyway, moving on. How's that taste? 463 00:32:06,497 --> 00:32:08,199 Oh... 464 00:32:10,400 --> 00:32:12,770 So... 465 00:32:12,803 --> 00:32:17,942 Do you guys have any questions for me or...? 466 00:32:17,976 --> 00:32:21,746 - Um... - Um... 467 00:32:21,780 --> 00:32:27,319 Well, I guess, um, you guys could just tell us what you wish you knew before. 468 00:32:32,223 --> 00:32:38,029 I guess just like logistically, there's just a lot to handle. 469 00:32:38,062 --> 00:32:40,998 I underestimated how much time I would spend on the phone... 470 00:32:41,032 --> 00:32:44,770 - Right. - ...advocating and fighting for myself with bureaucrats. 471 00:32:44,803 --> 00:32:49,306 Yeah, I am more tired than I think we've ever 472 00:32:49,340 --> 00:32:52,276 imagined humanly possible. 473 00:32:52,310 --> 00:32:57,315 Well, forgive me if I'm wrong, but isn't all parents? 474 00:32:57,348 --> 00:33:01,486 - Uh-huh. - Hm. 475 00:33:04,988 --> 00:33:07,958 - And do you love his school? - Yeah, we do. 476 00:33:07,992 --> 00:33:09,294 We really... we love it. 477 00:33:09,326 --> 00:33:12,363 It take us a really long time to find some... 478 00:33:12,397 --> 00:33:16,034 something I think that fit. Um... 479 00:33:16,066 --> 00:33:19,970 And don't get me wrong, it's extremely expensive. 480 00:33:20,004 --> 00:33:23,542 - Oh, is public school horrible for...? - No, I don't mean that. 481 00:33:23,574 --> 00:33:27,411 I've heard great things. It's just once we found something we connected with, 482 00:33:27,445 --> 00:33:33,217 - we just... stayed. - Yeah, yeah. 483 00:33:33,251 --> 00:33:38,557 And you guys love the community center. Do you have fun there? 484 00:33:38,590 --> 00:33:42,494 Do I have fun? Um... I think it's great for Leon. 485 00:33:42,526 --> 00:33:45,296 - Mm-hm. - It's been wonderful for him. 486 00:33:45,330 --> 00:33:50,268 And, you know, Sandra's... she's incredibly... 487 00:33:50,301 --> 00:33:53,170 well connected, she's very well informed. 488 00:33:53,204 --> 00:33:58,342 We got a... we got a great pediatrician rec from her, so yeah. 489 00:34:02,580 --> 00:34:07,485 - Can I get you anything else? - No, but the food is spectacular. Thank you. 490 00:34:07,517 --> 00:34:09,920 Leon, did all the cooking. Right, Leon? 491 00:34:09,954 --> 00:34:11,289 - Yeah. - Yeah. 492 00:34:11,322 --> 00:34:12,923 - Good job, man. - Wonderful chef. 493 00:34:12,956 --> 00:34:14,525 You're a little chef? 494 00:34:18,128 --> 00:34:22,132 So do you not like Sandra? 495 00:34:22,166 --> 00:34:27,005 What... why would you say that? 496 00:34:27,037 --> 00:34:30,007 - Oh... - No! No, no, no! I mean, she's great. 497 00:34:30,041 --> 00:34:33,912 Look, we don't have a lot in common. Um... 498 00:34:33,945 --> 00:34:37,314 - But no. - Please say more. 499 00:34:37,347 --> 00:34:41,986 I... Oh, my God. 500 00:34:42,019 --> 00:34:46,423 You know, I just sometimes feel like she... 501 00:34:46,456 --> 00:34:49,493 sort of uses her son like some sort of literary device. 502 00:34:49,526 --> 00:34:53,965 Like some sort of magical realism trope, like, um... 503 00:34:53,997 --> 00:34:56,967 You know, like he's some sort of unicorn. 504 00:34:57,001 --> 00:35:00,338 - Leon, honey. You finished? - Yeah. 505 00:35:00,371 --> 00:35:05,175 Yeah? Okay. Well, you out of here? 506 00:35:05,209 --> 00:35:10,348 - I got it. - Okay. I actually think she used the term 507 00:35:10,381 --> 00:35:15,220 "magical creature" once. And so I just... I... 508 00:35:15,253 --> 00:35:19,691 I don't know, I find her approach... 509 00:35:19,724 --> 00:35:21,927 objectifying. 510 00:35:23,026 --> 00:35:25,264 Mm-hm. Yeah. 511 00:35:29,733 --> 00:35:33,537 Look at all those hearts! 512 00:35:33,570 --> 00:35:36,440 Don't you like hearts? You like rainbows better? 513 00:35:36,474 --> 00:35:39,144 - Yes. - Yeah. Me too. 514 00:35:43,481 --> 00:35:45,950 That's good? You like this one? 515 00:35:45,983 --> 00:35:47,718 Hold on, I wanna see your face. 516 00:35:47,751 --> 00:35:49,553 I will wait. 517 00:35:59,329 --> 00:36:03,267 - This one... this. - This one? All right. 518 00:36:03,300 --> 00:36:05,602 Wait. 519 00:36:05,635 --> 00:36:08,072 I do it. 520 00:36:08,106 --> 00:36:10,308 - Let me try this. - Okay. 521 00:36:10,340 --> 00:36:13,010 - Try that one. Yeah. - This one? All right. 522 00:36:13,043 --> 00:36:15,980 - Tell me when to go. - Okay. 523 00:36:20,184 --> 00:36:23,688 - He can play, right? - In house. In house. 524 00:36:23,720 --> 00:36:26,423 - In house? Yeah? - In house. 525 00:36:26,456 --> 00:36:29,226 Okay. Wanna do that one? 526 00:36:29,260 --> 00:36:32,397 Very good. 527 00:36:32,430 --> 00:36:35,633 That's so good. 528 00:36:39,037 --> 00:36:42,006 Um, guys, I think I'm just gonna take the subway. 529 00:36:42,039 --> 00:36:44,375 What, you sure? The Uber's a minute away. 530 00:36:44,409 --> 00:36:47,611 Yeah, but I have nausea, it's morning sickness. 531 00:36:47,644 --> 00:36:49,581 I don't really wanna be in the car, so... 532 00:36:49,613 --> 00:36:53,485 - But I love you. - I love you too. 533 00:36:53,517 --> 00:36:57,488 - See you. Love you. - Feel better. Yeah. Love you too. 534 00:37:05,630 --> 00:37:09,566 ...educated decision based on what life 535 00:37:09,599 --> 00:37:13,070 actually looks like for people living with Down syndrome in 2019. 536 00:37:13,104 --> 00:37:19,377 And so part of my job is to help them get these pamphlets out, 537 00:37:19,410 --> 00:37:22,147 get this current information out. 538 00:37:22,180 --> 00:37:26,251 And the thing that I love about the pamphlet is it does not say, 539 00:37:26,284 --> 00:37:29,586 "Down syndrome's amazing." No, what it does say 540 00:37:29,619 --> 00:37:35,359 is these are medical risks for people living with Down syndrome. 541 00:37:35,392 --> 00:37:40,130 Here is also this super beautiful baby, because that's Down syndrome. 542 00:37:40,164 --> 00:37:42,734 It's both sides of... it's honest. 543 00:37:42,767 --> 00:37:46,303 It's an honest and real representation of... 544 00:37:49,639 --> 00:37:52,443 You were the one who said it's fine, it's the second trimester. 545 00:37:52,477 --> 00:37:54,512 And if I could take it back, I would. 546 00:37:54,544 --> 00:37:58,582 - Too late. - Of course I know it's too late. 547 00:38:00,450 --> 00:38:05,289 Jess? Hey, is the... is the buzzer not working? 548 00:38:05,322 --> 00:38:08,092 Um, no, your Australian neighbor let me in. 549 00:38:08,126 --> 00:38:10,571 I'm actually gonna go grab a tea real quick. Do you guys want anything? 550 00:38:10,595 --> 00:38:12,464 Yeah, I'll make some tea. 551 00:38:12,497 --> 00:38:13,765 No, you need your alone time. 552 00:38:13,798 --> 00:38:16,267 No, we'd actually love to talk to you, um, now. 553 00:38:16,300 --> 00:38:17,735 So, what kind of tea do you want? 554 00:38:17,767 --> 00:38:21,606 No, no, I'm okay. Um... 555 00:38:21,639 --> 00:38:23,740 - Hey! - Hey. 556 00:38:23,773 --> 00:38:27,778 - Earl Grey okay? - No, Aaron, I'm really good. 557 00:38:27,811 --> 00:38:31,348 - Everything okay? - Mm-hm. 558 00:38:34,751 --> 00:38:36,621 So, um... 559 00:38:38,289 --> 00:38:39,756 We've been talking. 560 00:38:39,789 --> 00:38:41,525 And... 561 00:38:42,660 --> 00:38:45,464 You want an abortion. 562 00:38:49,233 --> 00:38:52,370 Yes, we want an abortion. 563 00:38:55,572 --> 00:38:59,376 - Okay. - Yeah? 564 00:38:59,410 --> 00:39:03,381 What do you mean? Of course. 565 00:39:03,414 --> 00:39:08,386 - I'm so sorry. - For what, babe? 566 00:39:21,198 --> 00:39:24,501 Mm-hm. 567 00:39:24,535 --> 00:39:27,506 Okay, yeah. That's fine. 568 00:39:29,874 --> 00:39:32,343 Okay, 8am. Okay. 569 00:39:34,711 --> 00:39:37,648 Thank you so much. All right, see you Tuesday. 570 00:39:37,682 --> 00:39:40,819 8am. Thank you. Bye. 571 00:39:44,255 --> 00:39:45,890 Hey, guys? 572 00:39:46,990 --> 00:39:50,628 Guys. Hey. 573 00:39:50,660 --> 00:39:52,963 What do you want to get for dinner? 574 00:39:52,997 --> 00:39:55,300 Um... 575 00:39:59,769 --> 00:40:03,974 - I'm easy. Whatever you want. - What do you want? 576 00:40:04,008 --> 00:40:07,312 Um... can we do Thai? 577 00:40:07,345 --> 00:40:09,247 - Thai it is. - Absolutely. 578 00:40:09,280 --> 00:40:11,917 - Yeah. - Okay. 579 00:40:43,847 --> 00:40:46,817 Open your mouth, close your eyes. Give me your tongue. 580 00:40:46,851 --> 00:40:51,488 Oh, my goodness! I can't believe you! 581 00:40:51,521 --> 00:40:53,457 - He's a daredevil. - Should I try? 582 00:40:53,490 --> 00:40:55,360 - Yeah. - I don't know if I can. 583 00:40:55,392 --> 00:40:58,762 I think it's gonna be too sour. 584 00:41:01,698 --> 00:41:03,042 - It's so sour. - Should she try it again? 585 00:41:03,066 --> 00:41:05,003 - Yeah. - Yeah? Oh! 586 00:41:05,035 --> 00:41:06,838 I don't like it. 587 00:41:08,072 --> 00:41:09,907 I have a surprise! 588 00:41:09,939 --> 00:41:12,943 Oh, my gosh! 589 00:41:15,912 --> 00:41:20,885 There was this one mom that I did really connect with. 590 00:41:20,918 --> 00:41:24,622 And Leon and her son really hit it off, but... 591 00:41:25,923 --> 00:41:29,794 she lived all the way in Washington Heights. 592 00:41:29,827 --> 00:41:34,332 So I did set up a few playdates, but honestly I just... 593 00:41:34,365 --> 00:41:37,334 - couldn't get there. - Hm. 594 00:41:37,367 --> 00:41:42,306 - Just like such a bad mom. - Oh, yeah. You're the worst mom. 595 00:41:44,742 --> 00:41:47,678 I kind of am. 596 00:41:47,711 --> 00:41:50,581 Definitely gonna call Child Protective Services. 597 00:41:50,613 --> 00:41:54,751 I am letting an iPad raise my child half the time. 598 00:41:58,722 --> 00:42:01,726 Whoa, whoa, whoa. What did he press? 599 00:42:01,758 --> 00:42:03,594 - I don't know. - Hold on. 600 00:42:05,396 --> 00:42:08,432 Yeah. Um... 601 00:42:08,465 --> 00:42:12,869 I just need to ask a hypothetical question. 602 00:42:12,903 --> 00:42:15,340 Dad, are you still there? 603 00:42:16,639 --> 00:42:18,575 Um, when you guys were pregnant with me, 604 00:42:18,608 --> 00:42:21,578 did you do any prenatal testing? 605 00:42:23,012 --> 00:42:25,515 Really? 606 00:42:25,548 --> 00:42:28,652 Um, what would have done 607 00:42:28,686 --> 00:42:31,122 had it come back positive for sickle cell? 608 00:42:31,155 --> 00:42:33,490 Would you have aborted me? 609 00:42:50,707 --> 00:42:54,445 Oh, do you remember that law firm that you were clerking at 610 00:42:54,477 --> 00:42:56,646 - when you and Josh first started dating? - Yes. 611 00:42:56,680 --> 00:43:00,585 Do I remember? 612 00:43:00,617 --> 00:43:02,686 Well, um, I looked them up. 613 00:43:02,720 --> 00:43:04,822 And I know that they represented Exxon, 614 00:43:04,854 --> 00:43:10,594 but they also were on the good side of the Supreme Court gay marriage case. 615 00:43:10,628 --> 00:43:12,796 So they're not all bad. 616 00:43:12,829 --> 00:43:14,097 I don't understand. 617 00:43:14,131 --> 00:43:17,535 Maybe you could try to get a job there. 618 00:43:17,568 --> 00:43:21,472 Look, I know that you said money was such a major factor. 619 00:43:21,505 --> 00:43:26,110 And I get part of what makes Bridget's life possible is that they have money. 620 00:43:26,142 --> 00:43:30,046 Look, the firm that I'm at now is the perfect firm for me. 621 00:43:30,079 --> 00:43:34,952 You know, and it's not easy to just get a job at another law firm. It's... 622 00:43:37,887 --> 00:43:42,693 I... I'm just thinking of options. 623 00:43:43,894 --> 00:43:46,898 Jess, I just want you to know that we've... 624 00:43:46,930 --> 00:43:50,001 we've considered all of this, we thought about all the possible options. 625 00:43:50,034 --> 00:43:52,537 You know, it's not a decision that we just made flippantly. 626 00:43:52,570 --> 00:43:55,006 No, I know. I know. 627 00:43:58,142 --> 00:44:01,044 - Is everything okay? - Yeah. 628 00:44:01,077 --> 00:44:04,481 Yeah, just... I'm fine. 629 00:44:09,653 --> 00:44:11,890 - Hey. - Hey. 630 00:44:13,023 --> 00:44:16,827 Okay. So, um... 631 00:44:16,860 --> 00:44:20,530 What we are about to do means nothing. Okay? Do you promise? 632 00:44:20,564 --> 00:44:22,042 - Yeah, yeah. - It doesn't change anything between us. 633 00:44:22,066 --> 00:44:23,176 We are not getting back together. 634 00:44:23,200 --> 00:44:24,468 - Okay. - Okay, great. 635 00:44:24,501 --> 00:44:25,602 Okay. 636 00:44:42,052 --> 00:44:45,122 - Hm? - Mm... 637 00:44:51,628 --> 00:44:56,099 You... want some scrambled eggs? 638 00:44:57,901 --> 00:45:01,238 Let's just stay like this for a little bit. 639 00:45:01,271 --> 00:45:02,940 Okay. 640 00:45:16,119 --> 00:45:19,490 Thank you for this. 641 00:45:23,160 --> 00:45:28,032 I am here for you. 642 00:45:32,936 --> 00:45:35,506 - Hey. - Hm? 643 00:45:40,043 --> 00:45:41,845 How are you doing? 644 00:45:41,878 --> 00:45:47,951 Hm? No, like... like how are you really doing? 645 00:45:47,985 --> 00:45:53,124 - Uh... - Look, it's just that if I know what you are going through, 646 00:45:53,157 --> 00:45:57,160 then I'll have a better chance of being there for you. 647 00:45:57,193 --> 00:46:00,965 Uh... 648 00:46:00,997 --> 00:46:04,769 I actually don't think that's true. 649 00:46:04,802 --> 00:46:08,204 What? Wait, whoa, whoa, whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa. 650 00:46:08,238 --> 00:46:12,043 - You don't think I can handle it? - No. 651 00:46:12,075 --> 00:46:14,746 No, I actually don't. 652 00:46:17,213 --> 00:46:21,018 - Really? - Yes. 653 00:47:00,356 --> 00:47:02,860 Hey. 654 00:47:02,892 --> 00:47:04,928 Thank you so for letting me stay with you guys. 655 00:47:04,961 --> 00:47:08,198 Oh, stop it. You can stay as long as you want. 656 00:47:08,231 --> 00:47:11,768 It'll be nice to have the extra childcare. 657 00:47:14,137 --> 00:47:20,110 Also, thank you for not asking me how I'm doing. 658 00:47:20,144 --> 00:47:22,287 Is that your way of saying you want me to ask how you're doing? 659 00:47:22,311 --> 00:47:26,249 No, no. It just means... you're not like scrutinizing me. 660 00:47:26,282 --> 00:47:30,121 I don't feel like I have to pretend like I'm okay around you. 661 00:47:30,153 --> 00:47:32,322 Good. 662 00:47:40,930 --> 00:47:43,700 What if I were to like have this kid on my own? 663 00:47:43,733 --> 00:47:46,736 You know? If I moved somewhere around here. 664 00:47:46,769 --> 00:47:49,273 - Would you help me? - Well... 665 00:47:49,305 --> 00:47:53,043 Jess, I'm not sure I'm well versed on Down syndrome. 666 00:47:53,077 --> 00:47:57,314 I know, but I'm not asking you to be like a physical therapist or anything. 667 00:47:57,347 --> 00:48:00,284 I'm just asking you, would you have my back? 668 00:48:00,316 --> 00:48:03,753 Of course I would. Yes, of course. 669 00:48:03,787 --> 00:48:05,657 Thank you. 670 00:48:06,456 --> 00:48:08,191 Eat those crackers. 671 00:48:08,224 --> 00:48:10,093 I mean, I shouldn't do it. 672 00:48:10,126 --> 00:48:12,729 It's probably a bad idea. You think it's a terrible idea. 673 00:48:12,762 --> 00:48:15,331 - I didn't say that. - But that's what you think, right? 674 00:48:15,365 --> 00:48:18,336 It's not for me to decide. 675 00:48:20,303 --> 00:48:22,305 What do you think, Winston? 676 00:48:22,338 --> 00:48:24,074 Oh. 677 00:48:24,108 --> 00:48:27,812 - Oh, sweetie. - Little baby boy. 678 00:48:35,818 --> 00:48:37,721 Jessica? 679 00:48:39,021 --> 00:48:41,357 - Hi! - Hi, Jess. 680 00:48:41,390 --> 00:48:44,360 Hey, Dad. Um, one second. 681 00:48:44,394 --> 00:48:48,332 - Hey. - Hey! 682 00:48:48,365 --> 00:48:50,367 Didn't know you guys were gonna be here. 683 00:48:50,400 --> 00:48:54,104 I'm sorry, what, am I not allowed to come and visit my grandbaby? 684 00:48:54,137 --> 00:48:59,209 Oh, well, she's at swim class, so... 685 00:48:59,242 --> 00:49:04,481 You haven't been returning my calls. 686 00:49:04,514 --> 00:49:06,950 I know, I'm sorry. 687 00:49:06,983 --> 00:49:11,221 Well, you know, when you do that I get seriously worried. 688 00:49:11,255 --> 00:49:15,191 Um... serious question for you, 689 00:49:15,224 --> 00:49:18,996 as the trustee of my trust. 690 00:49:19,028 --> 00:49:22,065 Could I take out a hundred grand to put down...? 691 00:49:22,099 --> 00:49:23,367 Oh. 692 00:49:23,400 --> 00:49:25,869 It's for a down payment on a house. 693 00:49:25,903 --> 00:49:30,374 I'm thinking somewhere in Connecticut, halfway between here and where you guys live. 694 00:49:30,407 --> 00:49:34,245 - What is wrong? - Why are we talking about real estate right now? 695 00:49:34,278 --> 00:49:36,814 I mean, you can understand why we're a bit... 696 00:49:36,847 --> 00:49:38,916 Yeah, Josh and Aaron don't want to have the kid. 697 00:49:38,948 --> 00:49:42,385 So I'm considering... 698 00:49:42,418 --> 00:49:45,421 I'm thinking about ways that I can adopt... 699 00:49:45,454 --> 00:49:48,424 - I mean, not adopt... - No. No. 700 00:49:48,457 --> 00:49:52,396 I'm not giving you the money for this. 701 00:49:52,428 --> 00:49:55,900 But you always said it was for a down payment. 702 00:49:55,932 --> 00:49:59,402 I mean, in terms of mortgage, I will still be working. 703 00:49:59,436 --> 00:50:02,139 I would work part-time where I currently work, 704 00:50:02,171 --> 00:50:06,976 or I would freelance, and I'd have child support from Josh and Aaron. 705 00:50:07,010 --> 00:50:10,214 Are you factoring in maintenance costs? 706 00:50:10,247 --> 00:50:12,116 - Are you factoring in... - Yes! Yes, I am. 707 00:50:12,148 --> 00:50:15,485 - Child support? - Yeah. No, I get it. 708 00:50:15,519 --> 00:50:19,523 It's the ultimate, um, stereotype. 709 00:50:19,555 --> 00:50:22,059 The single black mother. No, I get it. I get that. 710 00:50:22,092 --> 00:50:25,361 It's something that you guys have worked your entire lives to avoid. 711 00:50:25,394 --> 00:50:28,865 And it's... it's a real thing. I hear it. 712 00:50:28,898 --> 00:50:33,603 But I can't spend my entire life just avoiding being a stereotype. 713 00:50:33,637 --> 00:50:36,340 That can't be the deciding factor in everything. 714 00:50:36,372 --> 00:50:38,541 When your grandparents made this trust for you, 715 00:50:38,575 --> 00:50:44,515 this was not what they envisioned for it. To put it lightly. 716 00:50:44,548 --> 00:50:49,620 You have a trust because your grandparents saved every penny, 717 00:50:49,653 --> 00:50:53,858 and they worked very, very, very hard. 718 00:50:53,890 --> 00:50:57,260 Harder than you can even fathom. 719 00:50:57,293 --> 00:51:00,563 Okay. I acknowledge that. 720 00:51:00,597 --> 00:51:04,568 Okay? And I acknowledge the fact that I will never know 721 00:51:04,601 --> 00:51:07,204 what Grandma and Grandpa went through. 722 00:51:07,236 --> 00:51:10,240 But isn't one of the objectives of their hard work 723 00:51:10,273 --> 00:51:13,410 that I would be able to choose, that I'd be able to do what I want? 724 00:51:16,113 --> 00:51:22,119 The choice to be a single mother of a special needs child? 725 00:51:22,151 --> 00:51:25,588 I don't know. Maybe. Maybe that's what I want. 726 00:51:25,622 --> 00:51:30,361 - Jess. - Your have an exceptional career, okay? 727 00:51:30,394 --> 00:51:32,496 And I know you're not happy right now, 728 00:51:32,528 --> 00:51:36,065 but I think if you sacrifice your work, you will regret it. 729 00:51:36,099 --> 00:51:38,635 Mom, I'm not happy there. I'm not. 730 00:51:38,668 --> 00:51:41,337 And okay, yeah, maybe it looks cool 731 00:51:41,371 --> 00:51:45,075 that I'm working at this fancy nonprofit that does important work. 732 00:51:45,108 --> 00:51:46,919 But the more I think about it, the more I'm like, 733 00:51:46,943 --> 00:51:48,553 - do we actually do important work? - Yes. 734 00:51:48,577 --> 00:51:51,981 Or... or do we make wealthy donors likes yourselves 735 00:51:52,014 --> 00:51:55,451 feel less guilty for their privileged existences? 736 00:51:55,485 --> 00:51:57,354 Well, forgive me for my privilege, 737 00:51:57,387 --> 00:51:59,423 but your organization makes a difference. 738 00:51:59,456 --> 00:52:03,093 I am just a glorified web designer, Mom. Anyone could do that for them. 739 00:52:03,126 --> 00:52:05,162 Oh, I am so tired of you underselling yourself. 740 00:52:05,195 --> 00:52:07,997 You are a brilliant designer. You're a brilliant marketer. 741 00:52:08,030 --> 00:52:11,267 You're a brilliant technician. And you care about the causes. 742 00:52:11,300 --> 00:52:12,678 You're describing every chick in Brooklyn. 743 00:52:12,702 --> 00:52:14,570 Go to law school. 744 00:52:14,604 --> 00:52:16,439 - Make a difference that way. - Oh, my God! 745 00:52:16,472 --> 00:52:19,409 - I'm not going to law school. - Oh, that's too drastic? 746 00:52:21,278 --> 00:52:23,280 Start your own nonprofit. 747 00:52:23,313 --> 00:52:27,217 Mom, having this child is making a difference in an real and tangible way. 748 00:52:27,249 --> 00:52:30,253 Honey, think practically. Okay? 749 00:52:30,287 --> 00:52:34,525 - You're being... academic... - No, Mom, I am being practical. 750 00:52:34,557 --> 00:52:39,295 Because the public school system needs parents like me to lobby for change. 751 00:52:39,329 --> 00:52:42,533 Most of the parents who have children with DS, they're working class. 752 00:52:42,566 --> 00:52:44,968 They don't have time or the resources to do this. 753 00:52:45,001 --> 00:52:47,603 You don't have the time, you don't have the resources, 754 00:52:47,637 --> 00:52:51,441 and having one kid is a drop in the bucket. 755 00:52:51,474 --> 00:52:56,479 You know, honey, what you are talking about is... is healthcare inequality, right? 756 00:52:56,512 --> 00:52:58,748 - Hm. - So in an ideal world, 757 00:52:58,782 --> 00:53:01,651 everybody would have access to genetic testing. 758 00:53:01,684 --> 00:53:04,354 So that we could eradicate Down syndrome? 759 00:53:05,488 --> 00:53:07,992 Yes. 760 00:53:11,260 --> 00:53:13,463 Oh, my God. 761 00:53:13,497 --> 00:53:16,233 You have to see the parallels. That's eugenics. 762 00:53:16,265 --> 00:53:19,503 - Oh, Jess, God no! - Yes, yes, yes, it is. 763 00:53:19,535 --> 00:53:23,439 Yes, it is. They used to think that Mongolian blood was the cause for Down syndrome. 764 00:53:23,472 --> 00:53:26,610 You are not telling me anything that I don't know. Okay? 765 00:53:26,642 --> 00:53:30,347 People with Down syndrome 766 00:53:30,380 --> 00:53:33,650 have a much more difficult life. 767 00:53:33,682 --> 00:53:36,486 Okay, but where do we draw the line? 768 00:53:38,121 --> 00:53:43,059 We... we draw the line... 769 00:53:43,093 --> 00:53:45,029 at Down syndrome. 770 00:53:45,061 --> 00:53:48,564 Okay. This is gross. I can't be here right now. 771 00:53:48,597 --> 00:53:50,700 - Jess. - Jess, you do not have the luxury 772 00:53:50,733 --> 00:53:54,404 of thinking about this much longer. 773 00:54:06,249 --> 00:54:08,584 You know, when I was 20, 774 00:54:08,617 --> 00:54:11,387 I was dating this guy, it was before I met your dad. 775 00:54:11,421 --> 00:54:13,457 And I got pregnant. 776 00:54:13,490 --> 00:54:17,061 And I was overwhelmed and I was terrified to tell Grandma. 777 00:54:17,093 --> 00:54:20,430 And the prevailing sentiment was that it was a decision that one regrets 778 00:54:20,463 --> 00:54:22,065 for the rest of their lives. 779 00:54:22,099 --> 00:54:25,602 And I thought about having a kid with some guy. 780 00:54:25,635 --> 00:54:28,205 And when I think back to that now, 781 00:54:28,238 --> 00:54:33,310 I made the best possible decision. 782 00:54:33,343 --> 00:54:35,780 Mom, I've had an abortion. 783 00:54:37,581 --> 00:54:42,820 - Oh, Jess. - Dad, it's okay. It's okay. I'm fine. 784 00:54:42,852 --> 00:54:44,664 You know you could've come to me with that, right? 785 00:54:44,688 --> 00:54:47,356 Yes, of course. I just... it was... 786 00:54:47,389 --> 00:54:50,593 I was 23, and I had my therapist and... 787 00:54:50,626 --> 00:54:55,131 a week later I was fine. Look, that's not the issue here. 788 00:54:55,164 --> 00:54:58,835 - Then what is the issue? - It's... "This fetus has Down syndrome, 789 00:54:58,869 --> 00:55:00,504 let's throw it out with the garbage." 790 00:55:00,537 --> 00:55:01,872 Jess, I am not saying that. 791 00:55:01,905 --> 00:55:05,709 I do not support some dystopian society. 792 00:55:05,742 --> 00:55:09,313 If Josh and Aaron wanted to raise this child, 793 00:55:09,345 --> 00:55:13,483 and you were gonna be the godmother, 794 00:55:13,517 --> 00:55:16,220 that would be great. 795 00:55:19,923 --> 00:55:23,861 Okay. Well, maybe we should just call it a night. 796 00:55:25,494 --> 00:55:26,805 Do you want to come home for dinner? 797 00:55:26,829 --> 00:55:28,898 I think I'm gonna stay here 798 00:55:28,932 --> 00:55:32,269 and help put Winston to bed. 799 00:55:32,302 --> 00:55:38,742 Well, we're gonna talk tomorrow? Hm? 800 00:55:38,775 --> 00:55:43,313 Maybe tomorrow you'll feel like discussing this in a more adult way. 801 00:55:43,345 --> 00:55:46,382 Okay, Mom, no, I am an adult. I am an adult. 802 00:55:46,416 --> 00:55:50,387 Okay? I'm an adult and I'm having an adult... 803 00:55:50,419 --> 00:55:52,755 You are not having an adult conversation. 804 00:55:52,789 --> 00:55:55,726 You are acting like you're not making a decision 805 00:55:55,758 --> 00:55:59,295 that's going to affect all of our lives immensely. 806 00:55:59,329 --> 00:56:03,432 Okay? What happens after you're gone? Who's gonna provide for this child when you go? 807 00:56:03,465 --> 00:56:07,503 Okay? Don't act like... don't pretend that my thinking about this doesn't matter! 808 00:56:07,537 --> 00:56:09,273 Of course what you think matters! 809 00:56:09,305 --> 00:56:11,249 Why do you think I'm so desperate to get your approval? 810 00:56:11,273 --> 00:56:13,676 Well, you're not gonna get my approval, not like this. 811 00:56:13,709 --> 00:56:16,512 This girl has a Masters degree from Columbia University! 812 00:56:16,546 --> 00:56:19,225 Okay, a piece of paper that tells everyone else that I'm better than them. 813 00:56:19,249 --> 00:56:22,186 - Right, Mom? - Karen! 814 00:56:32,928 --> 00:56:36,200 Mm... 815 00:57:00,789 --> 00:57:04,794 - Hey, I'm so sorry about the email thing. - It's okay. 816 00:57:04,827 --> 00:57:08,764 Yeah, but I know it makes us look bad. Um, should I send an email 817 00:57:08,798 --> 00:57:11,001 following up to clarify or fix that mistake? 818 00:57:11,034 --> 00:57:13,803 - No, that'll just draw more attention to it. - Okay. 819 00:57:13,836 --> 00:57:18,575 - Um, but I am sorry. - It's okay. Don't worry about it. 820 00:57:39,028 --> 00:57:42,733 Hey, sorry, we close for lunch at 4, but we open for dinner at 5. 821 00:57:42,765 --> 00:57:45,302 - Is your manager around? - What can we help you with? 822 00:57:45,334 --> 00:57:49,606 I'm just wondering how you accommodate someone unable to walk up the stairs? 823 00:57:49,639 --> 00:57:52,309 Um, we'll do whatever we can to help them. 824 00:57:52,342 --> 00:57:57,546 But how? This is a hypothetical. No one's with me. But how? 825 00:57:57,579 --> 00:58:00,349 Could you hold on one second? 826 00:58:00,383 --> 00:58:02,586 Hey, how can I help you? 827 00:58:02,619 --> 00:58:05,521 You can make your restaurant wheelchair accessible. 828 00:58:05,555 --> 00:58:09,760 I mean, it's illegal, if you've ever heard of the Americans with Disabilities Act. 829 00:58:09,793 --> 00:58:12,829 - So... - Uh... 830 00:58:12,861 --> 00:58:16,832 - Thank you for the feedback. - Mm-hm. 831 00:58:16,865 --> 00:58:19,969 It's definitely something we're working on. 832 00:58:21,970 --> 00:58:24,840 We're working on installing a ramp. 833 00:58:24,874 --> 00:58:27,910 And in the meantime? 834 00:58:27,943 --> 00:58:31,947 We're more than happy to lift anyone up the steps. 835 00:58:31,981 --> 00:58:35,686 You're gonna lift someone? And how are they able to let you know that 836 00:58:35,718 --> 00:58:38,588 if they're just passing by? 837 00:58:38,621 --> 00:58:43,427 Thank you for the feedback. Is there anything else we can do for you? 838 00:58:43,459 --> 00:58:46,996 - Hey! How are you? - Okay. 839 00:58:47,030 --> 00:58:49,765 - What's up? - You know. 840 00:58:49,798 --> 00:58:52,101 Can I, um... can I take your coat or...? 841 00:58:52,135 --> 00:58:55,671 - No, it's okay. Can I have water? - Okay. Come in, yeah. 842 00:58:55,704 --> 00:58:59,008 - Can you get her some water? - Yeah, of course. 843 00:59:04,981 --> 00:59:07,351 - Thank you. - Mm-hm. 844 00:59:09,785 --> 00:59:11,655 Mm. 845 00:59:16,892 --> 00:59:22,565 I just... I just want you to know that we don't want this to be the end of... We... 846 00:59:22,599 --> 00:59:24,867 We want to try again with you. 847 00:59:24,901 --> 00:59:27,771 If that's something you're interested in. 848 00:59:27,803 --> 00:59:31,707 Whenever... whenever you're ready. 849 00:59:31,740 --> 00:59:35,978 Okay? I mean it. And no... no pressure. You've already... 850 00:59:36,012 --> 00:59:38,849 Josh, I... 851 00:59:38,881 --> 00:59:41,985 I know that you're trying to be thoughtful right now, 852 00:59:42,017 --> 00:59:44,887 and I appreciate it, I just, um... 853 00:59:44,921 --> 00:59:47,424 I can't think that far into the future. 854 00:59:47,456 --> 00:59:50,726 Okay. 855 00:59:50,760 --> 00:59:53,497 Please tell us what's wrong. 856 00:59:53,530 --> 00:59:57,534 Nothing's wrong. No, nothing's wrong. Um... 857 01:00:03,972 --> 01:00:07,043 Look, I know that this is... 858 01:00:08,744 --> 01:00:10,980 not what you planned for. 859 01:00:11,014 --> 01:00:13,849 But... 860 01:00:13,883 --> 01:00:17,854 what if we were co-parents? 861 01:00:17,887 --> 01:00:20,590 I could share some of the responsibility. 862 01:00:20,622 --> 01:00:24,660 I could move into an apartment within walking distance from here. 863 01:00:24,693 --> 01:00:26,662 Financially too. 864 01:00:30,767 --> 01:00:33,970 Look, why don't I give you some time to consider that? 865 01:00:34,003 --> 01:00:36,840 - Okay? Just sleep on it. - Wait, Jess. Can you... 866 01:00:36,872 --> 01:00:41,077 Is that even realistic? I mean, in all fairness... 867 01:00:41,110 --> 01:00:45,048 I would make it work. 868 01:00:45,081 --> 01:00:47,717 Look, I know that... 869 01:00:47,749 --> 01:00:49,995 Okay, getting a sister-wife is not what you bargained for. 870 01:00:50,019 --> 01:00:51,888 Jess, when we made this decision, 871 01:00:51,921 --> 01:00:54,491 we took into consideration the fact that we could lean on you, 872 01:00:54,523 --> 01:00:57,760 and that you'd be a huge part of our support system if... 873 01:00:57,793 --> 01:00:59,896 we had the child. 874 01:01:02,097 --> 01:01:04,233 Okay. Forget what I just said. 875 01:01:04,267 --> 01:01:06,903 Um... 876 01:01:06,936 --> 01:01:11,842 What if... what if you just got a monthly contribution to help pay for everything? 877 01:01:11,874 --> 01:01:15,878 And I would still just be "Aunt Jess," off to the side, not breathing down... 878 01:01:15,912 --> 01:01:18,014 - No, we couldn't ask that of you. - No, I know. 879 01:01:18,046 --> 01:01:21,684 I know you're not asking that of me, but... 880 01:01:21,718 --> 01:01:24,621 maybe I'm telling you that the money is coming your way, 881 01:01:24,653 --> 01:01:28,724 should you decide to have this kid. 882 01:01:28,758 --> 01:01:32,763 You've said that it was all about financial factors, so... 883 01:01:35,597 --> 01:01:37,066 We don't have time to sleep on it. 884 01:01:37,099 --> 01:01:40,603 Your appointment is day after tomorrow. 885 01:01:40,637 --> 01:01:44,073 Um... uh, no. 886 01:01:46,075 --> 01:01:48,145 Um... 887 01:01:53,282 --> 01:01:58,654 I... I postponed the appointment. 888 01:02:02,892 --> 01:02:06,530 - You postponed the appointment? - Yes. 889 01:02:06,563 --> 01:02:09,666 I can be in charge of the timing. It's okay. 890 01:02:12,568 --> 01:02:14,970 Look... 891 01:02:15,003 --> 01:02:19,742 Doesn't... doesn't Bridget seems happy? 892 01:02:19,776 --> 01:02:23,079 - And Sandra too. - No. No. 893 01:02:23,111 --> 01:02:26,715 Honestly. I mean... And so what if they are? 894 01:02:26,749 --> 01:02:31,555 It's a self-selecting population, you know? 895 01:02:31,588 --> 01:02:34,658 Look, the parents who are having a really, really hard time, 896 01:02:34,691 --> 01:02:38,328 the ones who maybe wish that they had... 897 01:02:38,360 --> 01:02:40,563 They're not the ones going to these meet-ups 898 01:02:40,597 --> 01:02:44,167 or the ones writing books about it. It's... 899 01:02:44,200 --> 01:02:48,071 And of that group, how do we know they're not just, like, faking happiness? 900 01:02:48,104 --> 01:02:52,842 Okay. Parenting is hard. 901 01:02:52,874 --> 01:02:55,344 It is not easy. I'm not saying that. 902 01:02:55,378 --> 01:02:59,749 Look, there's a reason you have gravitated towards Leon, 903 01:02:59,782 --> 01:03:05,588 okay, and not some of the other kids who are way less high-functioning than he is. 904 01:03:05,622 --> 01:03:12,596 Okay, this kid is not gonna be like that kid that you grew up with. 905 01:03:12,628 --> 01:03:16,599 It's not gonna be like Devon. Things are changing so much. 906 01:03:16,633 --> 01:03:18,735 Leon is where things are headed. 907 01:03:18,767 --> 01:03:20,803 Yeah, and the more intelligent the kids are, 908 01:03:20,836 --> 01:03:25,307 the more aware they are of their... their limitations. 909 01:03:25,340 --> 01:03:27,943 Look, that's in the book you gave us. 910 01:03:27,977 --> 01:03:31,214 Oh, I didn't know that you read that. 911 01:03:31,247 --> 01:03:33,216 Yeah, Jess. 912 01:03:33,249 --> 01:03:36,052 Look, let's say Leon wants to be a musician. 913 01:03:36,084 --> 01:03:40,689 Then it's his mom's job to tell him that that's not a realistic possibility. 914 01:03:40,722 --> 01:03:42,758 To constantly be the bearer of bad news... 915 01:03:42,791 --> 01:03:48,297 - No, Leon could be a musician. - Come on, it's not the same thing. 916 01:03:48,331 --> 01:03:52,369 The kids in the Special Olympics know that they are in the Special Olympics. 917 01:03:52,401 --> 01:03:56,740 - Josh, that's not helpful. - And they don't care. They like the Special Olympics. 918 01:03:56,773 --> 01:04:00,910 I'm pretty sure they're not like, "Oh, the Special Olympics." 919 01:04:00,943 --> 01:04:04,314 Okay, so Leon won't be the next Alicia Keys. Who cares? 920 01:04:04,347 --> 01:04:06,282 That's not what I'm saying. What I'm saying is 921 01:04:06,314 --> 01:04:09,785 I want our child to have a fulfilling life. 922 01:04:09,818 --> 01:04:12,655 Okay. Okay. Um... 923 01:04:12,689 --> 01:04:18,695 I think you're more so talking about the ego of the parents. 924 01:04:18,727 --> 01:04:22,731 Right? About being able to brag about your kid. 925 01:04:22,764 --> 01:04:25,067 'Cause lots of people with DS have fulfilling lives. 926 01:04:25,101 --> 01:04:28,872 I mean, there's a teacher at the center who's an adult who has DS 927 01:04:28,905 --> 01:04:31,041 and she seems pretty fulfilled. 928 01:04:31,073 --> 01:04:34,943 I'm pretty sure she doesn't wish she'd never been born. 929 01:04:34,977 --> 01:04:38,348 - All right. You know who Richard Dawkins is? - Of course. 930 01:04:38,381 --> 01:04:42,419 Well, he said it's... it's actually immoral, it's unethical 931 01:04:42,452 --> 01:04:45,988 to not terminate a fetus with DS. 932 01:04:46,021 --> 01:04:47,732 You know, it's not like we're the first people to... 933 01:04:47,756 --> 01:04:51,226 - He is alt-right. - No he's not. 934 01:04:51,260 --> 01:04:54,964 - He is blatantly anti-Islam. - He is against all religion. 935 01:04:54,997 --> 01:04:57,167 He's atheist, which last I checked, so were you. 936 01:04:57,200 --> 01:04:59,877 Okay, I think we're exhausted, so why don't we just call this a night. 937 01:04:59,901 --> 01:05:02,371 No, no, but you could try not to make it inflammatory. 938 01:05:02,405 --> 01:05:04,807 No, I know, "Pregnant bitches be crazy." 939 01:05:04,840 --> 01:05:08,177 Will you stop putting words in our mouths, Jess! 940 01:05:10,046 --> 01:05:13,483 Maybe Richard Dawkins is not alt-right, 941 01:05:13,515 --> 01:05:17,320 but what he is expressing there is eugenics. 942 01:05:17,352 --> 01:05:21,124 It's in the clothes of a civilized argument, but that is eugenics. 943 01:05:21,157 --> 01:05:24,260 My grandparents lost their entire families to eugenics. 944 01:05:24,293 --> 01:05:26,028 I think I know a thing or two about it. 945 01:05:26,061 --> 01:05:28,307 - To say that this is the same... - Oh, and I couldn't possibly 946 01:05:28,331 --> 01:05:31,934 understand because black people have never experienced eugenics. 947 01:05:31,968 --> 01:05:34,337 A little help here? 948 01:05:34,369 --> 01:05:37,272 Okay, great! Thank you so much. 949 01:05:37,305 --> 01:05:39,208 - I don't know... - This is so stupid. 950 01:05:39,242 --> 01:05:42,979 If you are now defining life as having begun... 951 01:05:43,012 --> 01:05:44,814 No, I'm not going pro-life on you. 952 01:05:44,847 --> 01:05:47,883 I just... I want you to actually think about this choice. 953 01:05:47,916 --> 01:05:52,020 We have. We have. I don't know how to convince you that we... 954 01:05:52,053 --> 01:05:57,494 - What... what do you want? - I want... I want you... 955 01:05:57,526 --> 01:06:02,331 I want you to start grieving this child that you have in your mind, 956 01:06:02,365 --> 01:06:05,235 and then start preparing for this kid. 957 01:06:05,267 --> 01:06:11,440 Start reading, start engaging with people when we go to the Playhouse. 958 01:06:11,474 --> 01:06:15,111 We have been, Jess, we've... 959 01:06:15,144 --> 01:06:19,515 Look, we want to be the parents that everyone expects us to be, 960 01:06:19,548 --> 01:06:24,987 that finds a way to turn this into a gift, who writes the memoir. 961 01:06:25,021 --> 01:06:27,122 But we're just, we're strong enough. 962 01:06:27,155 --> 01:06:28,957 Yes, you are! You can be! 963 01:06:28,990 --> 01:06:33,329 Okay, fine, then we are terrible people. Okay? 964 01:06:33,361 --> 01:06:35,932 I feel like that is what you want me to say. 965 01:06:35,965 --> 01:06:38,233 And so now that we've said it, can we just move on? 966 01:06:38,267 --> 01:06:41,337 - No, that is a cop-out. - Look, Jess. 967 01:06:41,369 --> 01:06:44,339 As gay men, our whole lives, 968 01:06:44,372 --> 01:06:48,378 we have made do with the cards we've been dealt and not complained about it. 969 01:06:48,410 --> 01:06:54,416 Okay? It's like ingrained in us that we should be grateful for the crumbs that we have. 970 01:06:54,450 --> 01:06:57,954 And I'm not saying that we deserve pity, I'm not. 971 01:06:57,986 --> 01:07:02,457 I'm just saying that we do deserve to be like everyone else. 972 01:07:02,490 --> 01:07:05,594 Okay? And not have to apologize for it. 973 01:07:05,628 --> 01:07:09,399 We are not some scummy rare outlier here. 974 01:07:09,432 --> 01:07:13,136 The majority of couples in our situation do decide to terminate, 975 01:07:13,168 --> 01:07:17,206 and just like them we deserve to try again, 976 01:07:17,240 --> 01:07:20,310 we deserve to try and have a kid who's... 977 01:07:20,343 --> 01:07:23,613 - Yeah. - A kid who's perfect. 978 01:07:23,646 --> 01:07:28,084 - No, a kid who's normal. - Josh, that's not the right word. 979 01:07:35,624 --> 01:07:39,428 Right. Yeah. 980 01:07:39,461 --> 01:07:46,235 You have this idea of this chill, little, quiet kid wearing Steven Alan clothes. 981 01:07:46,269 --> 01:07:49,305 You can't stand the thought of being in some fancy restaurant 982 01:07:49,338 --> 01:07:53,476 and having everybody look over at you because your slobbering retard child 983 01:07:53,508 --> 01:07:55,445 is throwing a tantrum. No, that's how most 984 01:07:55,477 --> 01:07:58,414 of the fucking bougie people in this city think, right? 985 01:07:58,447 --> 01:08:00,650 That's why this city is so full of stairs everywhere. 986 01:08:00,682 --> 01:08:03,151 Let's keep everyone out who's less than some Aryan ideal. 987 01:08:03,184 --> 01:08:05,554 Because, what, we think that we'll never grow old 988 01:08:05,588 --> 01:08:08,524 and lose our mobility, or God forbid, our mental ability? 989 01:08:08,557 --> 01:08:11,427 Yes, Jess, the system is fucked. That is not our fault. 990 01:08:11,459 --> 01:08:13,896 But when you say that it's a financial issue, 991 01:08:13,930 --> 01:08:17,567 what you really mean is you're not willing to give up any aspect of your lifestyle. 992 01:08:17,599 --> 01:08:22,004 - You guys are rich! - Okay, I think we've said everything we need to say, Jess. 993 01:08:22,037 --> 01:08:24,174 We've made our decision. 994 01:08:29,545 --> 01:08:31,981 I'm making mine. 995 01:08:32,013 --> 01:08:35,484 I may have to hold you to that contract that we wrote. 996 01:08:37,452 --> 01:08:41,089 Jess, the only way you can sue us is if we don't cover medical expenses, 997 01:08:41,122 --> 01:08:43,192 which we are doing, 100 percent for you. 998 01:08:43,224 --> 01:08:45,102 - You know what? The lawyer cautioned us about... - 100 percent. 999 01:08:45,126 --> 01:08:47,362 Aaron, I know that it is a gentlemen's agreement 1000 01:08:47,396 --> 01:08:50,233 or whatever, I'm not talking about suing you. 1001 01:08:50,265 --> 01:08:53,369 I'm talking about holding you to this as human beings. 1002 01:08:53,402 --> 01:08:56,039 What do you mean, contractually I have to have an abortion? 1003 01:08:56,071 --> 01:08:57,582 - What are you gonna do, tie me down? - Jess, of course! 1004 01:08:57,606 --> 01:08:59,251 You're absolutely right. If you want to have the kid... 1005 01:08:59,275 --> 01:09:02,612 I know that! Don't you think I fucking know that?! 1006 01:09:10,052 --> 01:09:13,488 Yeah, so... obviously, 1007 01:09:13,522 --> 01:09:16,092 I could have the kid if I wanted to, 1008 01:09:16,125 --> 01:09:19,662 and Josh would have to pay me child support. 1009 01:09:19,695 --> 01:09:23,566 We'd have a real Jerry Springer situation on our hands. 1010 01:09:23,598 --> 01:09:29,304 Obviously, I don't want to have to get lawyers involved if we don't have to. 1011 01:09:29,338 --> 01:09:32,608 Come on, Jess, that is not what you want, Jess. 1012 01:09:32,640 --> 01:09:36,146 - That cannot possibly be what you want. - I don't know. 1013 01:09:38,280 --> 01:09:41,651 I'm just saying, like, think about it. 1014 01:09:46,688 --> 01:09:49,624 - I'm gonna go. - Wait, Jess, we have to finish this conversation. 1015 01:09:49,657 --> 01:09:52,495 No, I think we've said everything we need to say. 1016 01:09:56,531 --> 01:10:00,469 Hi. Hey, how's it going? 1017 01:10:03,138 --> 01:10:06,375 Yeah. Oh, shit, shit. 1018 01:10:06,409 --> 01:10:08,611 I didn't realize how late it was. I'm so sorry. 1019 01:10:08,643 --> 01:10:14,483 Um, I just... can I take you out to dinner sometime this week? 1020 01:10:14,517 --> 01:10:18,421 There's this incredible place called Otway in Clinton Hill 1021 01:10:18,454 --> 01:10:24,027 that, I mean, it has the most amazing pumpkin dish that I've ever had in my life. 1022 01:10:33,268 --> 01:10:36,138 So? 1023 01:10:36,171 --> 01:10:38,741 - It's good. - What? 1024 01:10:38,773 --> 01:10:41,677 - Uh no, it is... - It's good. 1025 01:10:41,710 --> 01:10:44,447 It is more than good. It is amazing. 1026 01:10:44,479 --> 01:10:48,351 Look, I'd be happy if I was sitting in a McDonald's right now. 1027 01:10:48,384 --> 01:10:51,154 I'm just so happy to be out of the house. 1028 01:10:51,187 --> 01:10:54,390 Excuse me. 1029 01:11:00,429 --> 01:11:05,134 Uh, so I have a question for you, and I need you to be honest with me. 1030 01:11:05,166 --> 01:11:08,303 Okay. 1031 01:11:08,336 --> 01:11:12,075 Do you think that I could do this on my own? 1032 01:11:12,107 --> 01:11:15,677 Have this child? I mean, you've probably picked up on the fact 1033 01:11:15,710 --> 01:11:18,580 that Josh and Aaron don't want to... 1034 01:11:18,613 --> 01:11:23,119 I am so sorry. I am vomiting all of this on you. 1035 01:11:23,152 --> 01:11:27,256 Uh, I mean, I... I don't know. 1036 01:11:27,289 --> 01:11:31,693 - Yeah. - Right. 1037 01:11:31,727 --> 01:11:35,197 Maybe I should spend some more time with Leon. 1038 01:11:35,231 --> 01:11:39,469 You know, I could babysit and then you and Dan could have a date night. 1039 01:11:39,501 --> 01:11:43,371 We... he already has so many babysitters and... 1040 01:11:43,405 --> 01:11:47,509 he's on a pretty, you know, tight schedule. 1041 01:11:47,543 --> 01:11:54,517 - Yeah, but I'd like to. - I really appreciate it, but I'd rather not. 1042 01:11:54,549 --> 01:11:57,219 Oh, yeah. Oh, of course. 1043 01:11:57,253 --> 01:11:59,688 Um... oh, my God. 1044 01:11:59,722 --> 01:12:02,858 I... I probably just came off very Sandra-like. 1045 01:12:02,892 --> 01:12:06,295 No, with a very like, "Let me observe him in his natural habitat." 1046 01:12:06,327 --> 01:12:08,731 - Really? - And that's so gross. I'm so sorry. 1047 01:12:08,763 --> 01:12:11,300 It's really okay. 1048 01:12:13,768 --> 01:12:18,573 Do you think that I... I don't know, that I would be up to the task? 1049 01:12:18,607 --> 01:12:21,711 I mean... Well, just think about it and get back to me. 1050 01:12:21,744 --> 01:12:24,546 No, I really don't need to think about. I just... I don't know, Jess. 1051 01:12:24,580 --> 01:12:26,716 It's... it's truly your decision. 1052 01:12:26,749 --> 01:12:29,552 - Yeah, I know, but what do you think? - I don't think anything. 1053 01:12:29,585 --> 01:12:32,688 I think I don't know you well enough. I don't know your finances. 1054 01:12:32,720 --> 01:12:35,625 - I can tell you my finances. - That's really not the point. 1055 01:12:36,724 --> 01:12:40,463 I have a lot on my plate. 1056 01:12:58,546 --> 01:13:02,451 I mean, I don't mean to sound self-aggrandizing, 1057 01:13:02,483 --> 01:13:07,423 but why am I alive if not to do something like this? 1058 01:13:07,455 --> 01:13:09,224 You don't sound that way at all. 1059 01:13:09,258 --> 01:13:15,764 It is... it is so commendable, what you're doing. 1060 01:13:18,567 --> 01:13:21,938 I just have to find a way to handle it financially. 1061 01:13:21,970 --> 01:13:25,674 Well, there's a whole support network out there. You know that. 1062 01:13:25,707 --> 01:13:28,244 And I'm here to help in any way possible. 1063 01:13:28,277 --> 01:13:30,680 Thank you, really. 1064 01:13:30,713 --> 01:13:34,383 Oh, you know some people, they say the soul 1065 01:13:34,415 --> 01:13:37,719 is formed at conception. 1066 01:13:40,289 --> 01:13:42,825 - Who says that? - Hindus. 1067 01:13:42,857 --> 01:13:45,594 The Talmud, you know, it says it happens at birth. 1068 01:13:45,628 --> 01:13:49,564 And Islam says it happens somewhere in the middle. 1069 01:13:49,598 --> 01:13:54,303 - But it happens. - Why are you telling me this? 1070 01:13:54,335 --> 01:13:57,906 Oh, I thought you'd find it interesting. 1071 01:13:57,939 --> 01:14:04,880 I'm just saying I'm so happy, I think you're making the right decision. 1072 01:14:08,549 --> 01:14:14,322 Um, I... I actually have to get going. 1073 01:14:14,356 --> 01:14:19,594 Uh... I'm sorry, I... I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable. 1074 01:14:19,628 --> 01:14:23,900 No, no, I just... I have to go to work, so... 1075 01:14:25,601 --> 01:14:29,938 I think it's best if I take a leave of absence 1076 01:14:29,972 --> 01:14:32,675 while I figure this out. 1077 01:14:32,707 --> 01:14:36,612 - Okay. - But I do wanna come back. 1078 01:14:36,644 --> 01:14:42,651 And when I come back, if I were to move somewhere out of the city, 1079 01:14:42,684 --> 01:14:46,755 do you think I would be able to work remotely? 1080 01:14:49,357 --> 01:14:51,393 I don't know, Jess. 1081 01:14:51,427 --> 01:14:55,531 Let's talk about it when you get back. 1082 01:14:58,366 --> 01:15:01,704 I'm just... I'm just saying I am here for you. 1083 01:15:01,737 --> 01:15:04,707 - Okay? - Thank you. 1084 01:15:04,740 --> 01:15:09,879 And I think that we... we can do this. 1085 01:15:09,911 --> 01:15:13,581 We can do this here. Together. 1086 01:15:13,615 --> 01:15:15,017 - No! - What? 1087 01:15:15,049 --> 01:15:17,652 No! Oh, my God! Nate, no! 1088 01:15:17,686 --> 01:15:19,487 I don't... I don't even know... 1089 01:15:19,521 --> 01:15:23,058 I don't know if I'm having this child. 1090 01:15:23,092 --> 01:15:27,729 I just... I need space... I need space and time, 1091 01:15:27,763 --> 01:15:29,832 and that is why I'm going to Connecticut. 1092 01:15:29,865 --> 01:15:31,867 That's totally fine. I don't mind moving there too. 1093 01:15:31,900 --> 01:15:34,670 No, I'm not talking about moving! Fucking stop! Oh, my God! No! 1094 01:15:34,702 --> 01:15:39,974 I'm talking about going there, going there for a week. 1095 01:15:40,008 --> 01:15:42,412 That's it. 1096 01:15:46,013 --> 01:15:48,750 - Hey, hey, hey, I'm sorry. - Please don't. 1097 01:15:48,784 --> 01:15:51,720 Okay, okay. 1098 01:16:01,729 --> 01:16:04,666 Jess! Jess! 1099 01:16:04,700 --> 01:16:08,403 - Oh! Mrs. Friedberg, hi! - Jess! 1100 01:16:08,437 --> 01:16:10,139 - Call me Sarah. - Hi. 1101 01:16:10,171 --> 01:16:15,878 - How's your mom? - She's good. You know, she's busy as usual. 1102 01:16:15,911 --> 01:16:19,548 - Um, how's Emily? - Great. 1103 01:16:19,580 --> 01:16:24,419 She was just appointed executive director not-for-profit, Rhizome. 1104 01:16:24,452 --> 01:16:27,857 Oh. Oh, tell her I said congratulations. 1105 01:16:27,889 --> 01:16:30,992 I will, I will. How are you? 1106 01:16:31,026 --> 01:16:35,731 I'm good. Um... you know... 1107 01:16:35,763 --> 01:16:38,967 - Yeah, I'm pregnant. - Oh, my... oh, my God! 1108 01:16:39,000 --> 01:16:43,638 - Oh! Mazel tov! - Oh, thank you. 1109 01:16:43,671 --> 01:16:46,909 Your mom has not kept me properly informed. 1110 01:16:46,942 --> 01:16:48,944 When did you get married? 1111 01:16:48,977 --> 01:16:51,514 Um, it's actually a bit of a unique case. 1112 01:16:51,546 --> 01:16:55,750 Yeah, the surrogacy was for my two best friends... 1113 01:16:55,784 --> 01:16:58,487 - Oh, that's beautiful. - Yeah. 1114 01:16:58,519 --> 01:17:00,990 They discovered the fetus has Down syndrome 1115 01:17:01,022 --> 01:17:04,793 and they no longer want her, yada yada yada. 1116 01:17:04,826 --> 01:17:07,963 Oh, my God. I... 1117 01:17:07,995 --> 01:17:10,198 I... 1118 01:17:10,232 --> 01:17:13,602 Oh, uh... I'm so sorry. 1119 01:17:13,634 --> 01:17:17,472 Um, my heart goes out to you. 1120 01:17:17,505 --> 01:17:21,075 Well, there's to be sorry for. You know? 1121 01:17:21,108 --> 01:17:25,780 There are a lot worse things in the world. 1122 01:17:25,813 --> 01:17:30,718 Right. I didn't mean to imply... 1123 01:17:30,751 --> 01:17:34,055 - It's fine. - Do you need a ride? 1124 01:17:34,089 --> 01:17:38,059 No, uh, my sister should be here soon. 1125 01:18:04,987 --> 01:18:08,791 Sorry. I didn't wanna knock in case you were napping. 1126 01:18:08,823 --> 01:18:11,026 No, that's fine. 1127 01:18:11,058 --> 01:18:13,862 So Josh and Aaron called me. 1128 01:18:13,896 --> 01:18:16,732 - Mm-mm. - They wanted to make sure you were okay. 1129 01:18:16,764 --> 01:18:21,135 - Said they've been trying. - Did you tell them that I'm fine? 1130 01:18:21,169 --> 01:18:23,037 They want to talk in person. 1131 01:18:23,071 --> 01:18:25,573 There's nothing to talk about. 1132 01:18:25,607 --> 01:18:30,211 - What does that mean? - I've made up my mind. 1133 01:18:30,245 --> 01:18:33,916 But don't they deserve to know that? 1134 01:18:49,630 --> 01:18:52,901 - Do you watch Shark Tank? - No. 1135 01:18:52,934 --> 01:18:55,271 - Sh. - Sorry. No. 1136 01:18:55,304 --> 01:18:58,040 We're obsessed with it for some reason. 1137 01:18:58,072 --> 01:19:00,742 There's a new episode on tonight. 1138 01:19:00,776 --> 01:19:03,077 - Is he down? - Yeah. Yes. 1139 01:19:03,111 --> 01:19:05,014 What's wrong? 1140 01:19:05,046 --> 01:19:10,553 Our visitors seem to be waiting in the driveway. 1141 01:19:10,585 --> 01:19:12,153 They're 45 minutes early. 1142 01:19:12,187 --> 01:19:15,858 - Was I supposed to make food for them? - No. 1143 01:19:20,262 --> 01:19:23,032 Just give me a second. 1144 01:19:32,040 --> 01:19:34,143 Hey, uh... 1145 01:19:34,175 --> 01:19:40,348 Sorry we're so early. I thought there would be traffic or... 1146 01:19:40,381 --> 01:19:43,152 Um... 1147 01:19:43,184 --> 01:19:47,222 Winston is sleeping inside, so we should talk out here. 1148 01:19:48,624 --> 01:19:51,594 Okay, um... 1149 01:19:57,832 --> 01:19:59,969 You guys wanted to talk. 1150 01:20:00,001 --> 01:20:03,071 Yeah, we wanted to know how you're doing. 1151 01:20:03,104 --> 01:20:06,207 - Are you okay? - I'm great. 1152 01:20:14,849 --> 01:20:18,653 Have you guys changed your minds? 1153 01:20:18,687 --> 01:20:21,256 Well, we thought about the possibility of adoption. 1154 01:20:21,289 --> 01:20:23,726 We found this great organization of people... 1155 01:20:23,759 --> 01:20:26,962 I know about that. It's... 1156 01:20:26,995 --> 01:20:29,932 Hm. I don't know. 1157 01:20:32,233 --> 01:20:36,138 So I have decided to have this kid on my own. 1158 01:20:37,839 --> 01:20:40,242 And I don't want you to be a part of the child's life. 1159 01:20:40,275 --> 01:20:42,844 I'll have my lawyer contact your lawyer, 1160 01:20:42,878 --> 01:20:45,179 but basically, in the state of Connecticut... 1161 01:20:45,213 --> 01:20:47,124 Jess, why don't we go inside? Or we can come back later 1162 01:20:47,148 --> 01:20:49,250 if you don't feel up to this right now. 1163 01:20:49,284 --> 01:20:51,186 What makes you think I don't feel up to this? 1164 01:20:51,219 --> 01:20:53,722 Your... your attitude, how you're talking to us. 1165 01:20:53,754 --> 01:20:55,333 - Okay, all right. - We're trying to figure out exactly 1166 01:20:55,357 --> 01:20:57,259 what the best way to proceed forward with you... 1167 01:20:57,291 --> 01:20:58,927 You came to my house, so... 1168 01:20:58,960 --> 01:21:01,063 - To talk to you, for you. - Would you let me finish 1169 01:21:01,095 --> 01:21:05,066 - what I have to say? You interrupted me. - Please. Please. 1170 01:21:05,099 --> 01:21:10,004 Great, so my lawyer will contact your lawyer soon. 1171 01:21:10,037 --> 01:21:14,175 But basically, in the state of Connecticut, you do not need the father's name 1172 01:21:14,209 --> 01:21:17,979 to be on the birth certificate, you only need the mother's name. 1173 01:21:18,013 --> 01:21:20,314 Is that okay with you? 1174 01:21:20,348 --> 01:21:22,384 Look, this is what you wanted, right? 1175 01:21:22,416 --> 01:21:27,388 To pretend the child does not exist? So pretend the child does not exist. 1176 01:21:27,421 --> 01:21:30,793 Okay, all right. Um... 1177 01:21:30,826 --> 01:21:35,930 I just want to say that we support whatever decision you make here. 1178 01:21:35,964 --> 01:21:39,401 But... but when you say no involvement... 1179 01:21:39,433 --> 01:21:41,969 That is exactly what I mean. 1180 01:21:42,003 --> 01:21:44,439 I think no contact is best. 1181 01:21:44,473 --> 01:21:46,975 I just don't think it's a good idea for a child 1182 01:21:47,008 --> 01:21:51,013 to be around adults who think that something is wrong with her, 1183 01:21:51,045 --> 01:21:53,314 that she is broken because of her chromosomal situation. 1184 01:21:53,348 --> 01:21:56,085 - Jess. - No, I know, I know you would never say that 1185 01:21:56,117 --> 01:21:59,187 in front of her, and obviously I would never repeat it. 1186 01:21:59,220 --> 01:22:01,790 But children, they pick up on energy. 1187 01:22:07,195 --> 01:22:09,331 I mean, come on, you can't just come here and be like, 1188 01:22:09,363 --> 01:22:12,433 "We wanna be her godfathers," as if... 1189 01:22:12,467 --> 01:22:14,202 as if everything is hunky-dory. 1190 01:22:14,236 --> 01:22:15,812 - We're not trying to come here like that! - Jess. 1191 01:22:15,836 --> 01:22:19,006 - Okay. - I am so not comfortable 1192 01:22:19,040 --> 01:22:22,745 with this no contact thing. Okay? 1193 01:22:22,777 --> 01:22:25,880 And why is that what you want? I mean... 1194 01:22:25,914 --> 01:22:31,420 Hey, I'm sorry. I know this is never going to be... 1195 01:22:31,452 --> 01:22:35,523 like it was, but why don't you want our support at least? 1196 01:22:35,557 --> 01:22:37,492 - Jess. - Jess, where are you doing? 1197 01:22:37,526 --> 01:22:40,162 There's a child in there taking a nap, 1198 01:22:40,195 --> 01:22:42,997 and we are being loud. 1199 01:22:49,271 --> 01:22:52,474 Look, what I'm proposing is what you guys wanted, right? 1200 01:22:52,506 --> 01:22:55,911 So why don't you just go back to Williamsburg and leave me the fuck alone. 1201 01:22:55,943 --> 01:23:00,515 Jess, hey. It's me, Josh. 1202 01:23:00,549 --> 01:23:06,956 I've made a decision that you don't agree with, but it's still me. 1203 01:23:10,325 --> 01:23:16,197 Look, I would be related to this kid. Okay? 1204 01:23:16,231 --> 01:23:20,869 - It would be ours. - And? 1205 01:23:20,902 --> 01:23:24,072 Even if you got full custody, there may come a day 1206 01:23:24,104 --> 01:23:28,876 when the child wants to have contact with... 1207 01:23:28,910 --> 01:23:32,982 Are you just gonna pretend that we don't exist? That's not fair. 1208 01:23:36,116 --> 01:23:39,187 Look, whatever happens, 1209 01:23:39,220 --> 01:23:43,224 we are gonna be a part of this kid's life. We just... we are. 1210 01:23:52,968 --> 01:23:57,072 Jess! Where are you going? 1211 01:24:00,909 --> 01:24:02,378 You're right. 1212 01:24:04,278 --> 01:24:06,314 You are absolutely right. 1213 01:24:08,049 --> 01:24:12,153 Having this child would link me to you forever. 1214 01:24:34,409 --> 01:24:36,946 Oh, Jess. 1215 01:24:40,281 --> 01:24:42,183 Jess... 1216 01:26:23,218 --> 01:26:26,988 - Hey. - Hey. 1217 01:27:18,673 --> 01:27:21,242 Oh. Thanks. 1218 01:27:26,481 --> 01:27:30,786 Oh, that's... that's horrible. 1219 01:27:38,425 --> 01:27:43,330 I made an appointment for an abortion tomorrow. 1220 01:27:43,363 --> 01:27:46,334 - Will you come with me? - Mm-hm. 1221 01:27:48,836 --> 01:27:52,775 - Are you okay to miss work? - Jess. 1222 01:27:53,842 --> 01:27:55,744 Thank you. 1223 01:28:04,251 --> 01:28:07,822 - Do you want some yogurt? - I'm okay. 1224 01:28:49,897 --> 01:28:53,134 - Oh! - Hey! 1225 01:29:00,308 --> 01:29:02,677 - You okay? - Yeah. I just... 1226 01:29:02,710 --> 01:29:06,548 There's a sliding part over here, right? 1227 01:29:06,580 --> 01:29:10,284 Oh, God. 1228 01:29:14,188 --> 01:29:17,392 Whoo! 1229 01:29:17,424 --> 01:29:19,660 - Was it that bad? - Yeah, I just said fuck it. 1230 01:29:19,693 --> 01:29:23,598 Yeah. 1231 01:29:25,366 --> 01:29:29,771 Oh! Oh! 1232 01:29:32,206 --> 01:29:33,874 Three, two, one. 1233 01:29:33,907 --> 01:29:37,278 Whoo! 1234 01:29:37,312 --> 01:29:39,481 - Not too bad. - It's not too bad! 1235 01:29:39,513 --> 01:29:41,682 - It's good, right? - It's a little cold. 1236 01:29:47,589 --> 01:29:50,392 Oh yes! 1237 01:29:50,424 --> 01:29:53,661 If I don't warm up... 1238 01:29:53,695 --> 01:29:55,405 Yeah, I feel like this is one of those situations 1239 01:29:55,429 --> 01:29:56,964 where I have to be there to warm it up. 1240 01:29:56,997 --> 01:29:59,334 - So... don't do that. - Why? 1241 01:29:59,366 --> 01:30:01,902 - Don't do that. - This is it. The river! 1242 01:30:01,936 --> 01:30:03,938 Go down there. 1243 01:30:03,972 --> 01:30:05,974 - You might want... What? - Go down there. 1244 01:30:06,006 --> 01:30:09,411 - It gets really warm. - You're about to feel it 1245 01:30:09,443 --> 01:30:13,380 in like three seconds. 1246 01:30:13,414 --> 01:30:15,384 Ooh! 1247 01:30:19,586 --> 01:30:22,256 It's so pretty out today. 100898

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