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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,000 --> 00:00:24,278 http://subscene.com/u/659433 Improved by: @Ivandrofly 2 00:00:24,280 --> 00:00:26,005 (VEHICLE APPROACHES) 3 00:00:31,120 --> 00:00:32,765 (BRAKES SQUEAL) 4 00:00:34,800 --> 00:00:36,286 (HORN HONKS) 5 00:00:36,960 --> 00:00:38,321 (KNOCKING) 6 00:00:39,680 --> 00:00:42,008 Gilbert, you better get up. They're here. 7 00:00:42,680 --> 00:00:45,359 - I'm up. - You Okay? 8 00:00:45,360 --> 00:00:47,719 - Yeah. - You're sure? 9 00:00:47,720 --> 00:00:49,046 Sure, I'm sure. 10 00:00:52,120 --> 00:00:54,639 Mom, you remember the first time you left home? 11 00:00:54,640 --> 00:00:57,969 Yes. And I was just as scared as you are. 12 00:00:58,920 --> 00:01:00,839 I'm not scared, really. 13 00:01:00,840 --> 00:01:03,519 I just don't like the idea of leaving you here all alone. 14 00:01:03,520 --> 00:01:05,159 Oh, I'll be fine. 15 00:01:05,160 --> 00:01:07,439 I was fine when you went away to computer camp. 16 00:01:07,440 --> 00:01:12,479 - Mom, that was just for two weeks. - I can take care of myself. 17 00:01:12,480 --> 00:01:16,479 - I'm much more worried about you. - I'm gonna be just fine. 18 00:01:16,480 --> 00:01:19,684 Anyways, I'm not gonna be alone. I got Lewis. 19 00:01:19,920 --> 00:01:21,451 - (CHUCKLES) - Gilbert? 20 00:01:21,840 --> 00:01:24,679 Come on. Rise and shine. 21 00:01:24,680 --> 00:01:26,999 Dad's waiting outside in the car. It's all packed. 22 00:01:27,000 --> 00:01:28,679 - Hi, Flo. - Hi. 23 00:01:28,680 --> 00:01:32,239 It's a beautiful day, isn't it? It's gonna be a great year. 24 00:01:32,240 --> 00:01:34,719 Now, I figure with lunch and two A.R.V.'s 25 00:01:34,720 --> 00:01:36,999 we should be on the road approximately seven hours, 26 00:01:37,000 --> 00:01:38,679 eighteen minutes and seven seconds. 27 00:01:38,680 --> 00:01:41,406 - A.R.V.'s? - Average restroom visits. 28 00:01:41,680 --> 00:01:43,405 - (LAUGHS) - (LAUGHS) 29 00:01:44,120 --> 00:01:46,679 Oh, I'm so proud of you two boys. 30 00:01:46,680 --> 00:01:49,199 Come on, Gilbert. Let's go to college. 31 00:01:49,200 --> 00:01:50,401 (LAUGHS) 32 00:01:50,960 --> 00:01:52,039 (CHUCKLING) 33 00:01:52,040 --> 00:01:53,730 God. 34 00:01:53,880 --> 00:01:55,411 (POP SONG PLAYING) 35 00:02:21,160 --> 00:02:26,039 Hey, Lewis, what time you got? I'm trying to work out our exact E.T.A. 36 00:02:26,040 --> 00:02:30,006 I got 2:37. Dad, how fast are we going? 37 00:02:30,280 --> 00:02:34,041 I've, uh, got the old cruise control set at 35. 38 00:02:38,920 --> 00:02:40,281 (HORN HONKS) 39 00:02:47,280 --> 00:02:48,811 (HORN BLARING) 40 00:03:06,080 --> 00:03:09,479 Adams College. Home of the Atoms. 41 00:03:09,480 --> 00:03:11,599 Gilbert, this is gonna be really neat. 42 00:03:11,600 --> 00:03:14,319 Yeah? I sure hope so. What if it isn't, huh? 43 00:03:14,320 --> 00:03:17,799 Don't be so negative. We're gonna have the time of our lives. 44 00:03:17,800 --> 00:03:20,519 I'm not being negative. I'm just being nervous, okay? 45 00:03:20,520 --> 00:03:23,079 Well, don't be, okay? 'Cause everything's gonna be great. 46 00:03:23,080 --> 00:03:25,719 - Just like high school, right? - This is college. 47 00:03:25,720 --> 00:03:29,359 Remember. There's 6,127 students at Adams, 48 00:03:29,360 --> 00:03:30,479 (CALCULATOR PRINTS) 49 00:03:30,480 --> 00:03:33,239 - 58% of which are girls. - So? 50 00:03:33,240 --> 00:03:38,844 - So that's 7,107.32 boobs. - (ALL LAUGH) 51 00:03:39,160 --> 00:03:43,160 Aw, you college guys are all alike. All you really care about is getting laid. 52 00:03:43,960 --> 00:03:46,925 - I wish I was goin' with you. - (BOTH LAUGH) 53 00:03:48,800 --> 00:03:51,048 - (LAUGHS) - Dad! 54 00:03:57,760 --> 00:04:00,879 LEWIS: Wow. This campus is awesome. 55 00:04:00,880 --> 00:04:03,731 It's a lot bigger than I expected. 56 00:04:05,320 --> 00:04:08,679 - Maybe we should've gone to City Tech. - Come on. Tech's nothin'. 57 00:04:08,680 --> 00:04:12,399 You know Adams has got the best computer department in the country. 58 00:04:12,400 --> 00:04:16,002 Yeah, you're right. Adams is the best. 59 00:04:32,400 --> 00:04:33,726 (TIRES SQUEAL) 60 00:04:39,000 --> 00:04:44,001 MR. SKOLNICK: Well, boys, I mean men, here we are. 61 00:04:44,040 --> 00:04:45,571 (SONG FADES OUT) 62 00:04:47,480 --> 00:04:50,639 What an opportunity for you guys. (LAUGHS) 63 00:04:50,640 --> 00:04:53,081 You're both gonna do great. I'm proud of you. 64 00:04:55,200 --> 00:04:57,519 Your father would have been proud of you too, Gilbert. 65 00:04:57,520 --> 00:04:58,879 Oh, I know Mr. Skolnick. 66 00:04:58,880 --> 00:05:02,279 Don't tell my mother I was nervous, okay? I wouldn't want her to worry. 67 00:05:02,280 --> 00:05:05,039 - Of course not. Don't sweat it. - Thanks. 68 00:05:05,040 --> 00:05:06,559 (BIKE BELL RINGS) 69 00:05:06,560 --> 00:05:09,081 Hey, Lewis. Come here. Sit down. 70 00:05:12,280 --> 00:05:17,611 I envy you, Lewis. This is one of the finest institutions in the country. 71 00:05:18,800 --> 00:05:22,399 You're gonna do fantastic here. 72 00:05:22,400 --> 00:05:25,639 Try not to break too many hearts, huh, Lewis? 73 00:05:25,640 --> 00:05:27,759 That hasn't been a real problem yet, Dad. 74 00:05:27,760 --> 00:05:31,239 Aw, come on. You're gonna make some lucky girl very happy. 75 00:05:31,240 --> 00:05:34,319 You're smart, easygoing. 76 00:05:34,320 --> 00:05:36,359 Got your father's good looks. 77 00:05:36,360 --> 00:05:37,971 (BOTH LAUGH) 78 00:05:38,680 --> 00:05:40,799 And you got a great sense of humor. 79 00:05:40,800 --> 00:05:43,279 Really believe in you, son. 80 00:05:43,280 --> 00:05:46,839 - Thanks, Dad. I won't let you down. - I know. 81 00:05:46,840 --> 00:05:50,328 Gilbert, help me with the trunk. 82 00:05:52,840 --> 00:05:56,679 - Uh, Gilbert... - Yes, sir? 83 00:05:56,680 --> 00:05:59,439 College isn't like high school. 84 00:05:59,440 --> 00:06:01,719 You'll... You'll be on your own. 85 00:06:01,720 --> 00:06:04,439 - I want you to take care of yourself. - I will. 86 00:06:04,440 --> 00:06:06,759 Anyway, I won't be alone. I got Lewis. 87 00:06:06,760 --> 00:06:09,799 - Besides, we're college men now, right? - Right! 88 00:06:09,800 --> 00:06:11,206 - (CHUCKLES) - Ow. 89 00:06:13,120 --> 00:06:15,766 Whoop! Here. Come here. 90 00:06:16,800 --> 00:06:18,809 - Easier gettin' it down. - (GROANS) 91 00:06:20,040 --> 00:06:21,839 - (TRUNK SLAMS ON GROUND) - Come on, guys. 92 00:06:21,840 --> 00:06:23,451 This is an historic moment. 93 00:06:24,360 --> 00:06:25,479 All right. 94 00:06:25,480 --> 00:06:28,679 - Say cheese! - Cheese! 95 00:06:28,680 --> 00:06:30,530 - Got it. - (BOTH CHUCKLE) 96 00:06:31,200 --> 00:06:33,164 - Bye, Dad. - (CHUCKLES) 97 00:06:34,920 --> 00:06:37,919 Bye. Thanks for the ride. 98 00:06:37,920 --> 00:06:41,408 - GIRL: Look at this! (LAUGHING) - Ah. 99 00:06:42,800 --> 00:06:44,490 (BIKE BELL RINGS) 100 00:06:45,200 --> 00:06:47,879 Whoa. Look out. 101 00:06:47,880 --> 00:06:50,128 - You okay? - Yeah. 102 00:06:58,240 --> 00:07:01,887 - Bye, Mr. Skolnick! - Drive careful, Dad! 103 00:07:03,520 --> 00:07:05,479 Wait a minute! Watch out! 104 00:07:05,480 --> 00:07:06,920 - (SCREAMS) - (GRUNTS) 105 00:07:08,040 --> 00:07:10,288 - Sorry! Excuse us. - (WHIMPERING) 106 00:07:13,840 --> 00:07:15,559 MAN: At ease! At ease! At ease! 107 00:07:15,560 --> 00:07:18,519 You know, Gilbert? I feel different already. 108 00:07:18,520 --> 00:07:21,639 Like, uh, more mature. 109 00:07:21,640 --> 00:07:23,719 Yeah. Looks like we're in for quite a change. 110 00:07:23,720 --> 00:07:29,359 I'll say. Parties. Meeting new people. This is really gonna be great. 111 00:07:29,360 --> 00:07:32,039 - I don't know. - Just relax. Be yourself. 112 00:07:32,040 --> 00:07:36,040 Like Davy Crockett always said, be sure you're right, then go ahead. 113 00:07:36,880 --> 00:07:38,206 - Hey! - (GRUNTING) 114 00:07:40,320 --> 00:07:44,159 (CHANTING) Ogre! Ogre! Ogre! Ogre! 115 00:07:44,160 --> 00:07:46,239 Anyway, college is a whole new ball game. 116 00:07:46,240 --> 00:07:48,039 Nerds! 117 00:07:48,040 --> 00:07:50,279 People judge you different than they did in high school. 118 00:07:50,280 --> 00:07:52,719 - Nerds! - Ogre! Ogre! Ogre! Ogre! 119 00:07:52,720 --> 00:07:55,919 - Nerds! - (CHANTING CONTINUES) 120 00:07:55,920 --> 00:07:59,759 - Nerds! - Where are they? 121 00:07:59,760 --> 00:08:02,759 - I think they're talking about us. - No way. 122 00:08:02,760 --> 00:08:04,759 - Nerds! - (BOY SCREAMING) 123 00:08:04,760 --> 00:08:05,959 (THUD) 124 00:08:05,960 --> 00:08:08,319 (CHANTING) Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! 125 00:08:08,320 --> 00:08:10,799 Come on, Lewis. Let's go. 126 00:08:10,800 --> 00:08:14,399 Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! 127 00:08:14,400 --> 00:08:15,601 (YELLING) 128 00:08:17,920 --> 00:08:19,804 (ROCK SONG PLAYING) 129 00:08:22,200 --> 00:08:23,686 Yeah. 130 00:08:24,760 --> 00:08:25,961 (EXHALES) 131 00:08:26,400 --> 00:08:28,090 (WHOOPING) 132 00:08:34,560 --> 00:08:36,919 Ogre! 133 00:08:36,920 --> 00:08:39,122 Fill 'er up, baby! 134 00:08:41,160 --> 00:08:42,930 All right! 135 00:08:47,000 --> 00:08:48,201 (LAUGHS) 136 00:08:48,240 --> 00:08:49,930 (WHOOPING) 137 00:08:51,600 --> 00:08:52,801 (YELLING) 138 00:08:55,080 --> 00:08:57,647 Mmm, Stan. 139 00:09:01,200 --> 00:09:05,279 Okay, everybody, listen up! It's time for stair diving! 140 00:09:05,280 --> 00:09:06,970 (CHEERING) 141 00:09:16,120 --> 00:09:17,481 (CHEERING) 142 00:09:27,920 --> 00:09:30,639 - (GRUNTING) - Well, Gilbert, here's our new home. 143 00:09:30,640 --> 00:09:32,922 Can't believe we finally made it. 144 00:09:43,240 --> 00:09:44,441 (GRUNTS) 145 00:09:44,760 --> 00:09:46,007 (PANTING) 146 00:09:50,680 --> 00:09:53,999 Lewis, if you don't want the bed by the window, I'll take it. 147 00:09:54,000 --> 00:09:56,279 - You got it. - Thanks. 148 00:09:56,280 --> 00:09:58,482 Sure. 149 00:10:02,200 --> 00:10:04,359 You know, this is really a great room. 150 00:10:04,360 --> 00:10:06,722 - Yup. - Definite possibilities. 151 00:10:09,520 --> 00:10:13,679 Do you think maybe they'd let us put in a little refrigerator for snacks and things? 152 00:10:13,680 --> 00:10:17,646 Are you kidding, Gilbert? We can put a fridge and a microwave right there. 153 00:10:18,360 --> 00:10:20,722 That'd be a good place for the entertainment center, too. 154 00:10:21,440 --> 00:10:22,880 Great. 155 00:10:24,040 --> 00:10:25,599 And that's just the beginning. 156 00:10:25,600 --> 00:10:27,799 We're gonna have the best dorm room on campus. 157 00:10:27,800 --> 00:10:30,959 I don't know about the best, Lewis. It'll certainly be the messiest. 158 00:10:30,960 --> 00:10:34,209 Relax, Gilbert. Remember, we got it covered. 159 00:10:36,200 --> 00:10:39,999 This robot will be better than a maid. 160 00:10:40,000 --> 00:10:43,568 - It'll help with the women too. - Women? 161 00:10:43,960 --> 00:10:47,679 Yeah. Let's say one of us is up here with a woman? 162 00:10:47,680 --> 00:10:51,399 This'll be our early warning device, so we don't walk in on each other. 163 00:10:51,400 --> 00:10:55,079 Wait a minute. We're allowed to have girls in our dorm room? 164 00:10:55,080 --> 00:10:57,199 Not girls, Gil. Women. 165 00:10:57,200 --> 00:11:00,039 - We're college men now. - Isn't college great? 166 00:11:00,040 --> 00:11:02,607 It's gonna be a great year. (LAUGHS) 167 00:11:02,800 --> 00:11:04,206 (BOTH LAUGH) 168 00:11:05,400 --> 00:11:07,284 (ROCK SONG PLAYING) 169 00:11:11,000 --> 00:11:13,567 Come on, Betty. Show me what you got. 170 00:11:15,599 --> 00:11:17,079 - Gable, check this out. - What is it? 171 00:11:17,080 --> 00:11:19,319 - It is outrageous, man. - What is it? 172 00:11:19,320 --> 00:11:21,090 Just try it! 173 00:11:22,240 --> 00:11:23,319 - Oh! - (LAUGHS) 174 00:11:23,320 --> 00:11:24,399 Are you okay? 175 00:11:24,400 --> 00:11:27,279 - Jesus, Burke, what is this? - 188 proof. 176 00:11:27,280 --> 00:11:29,608 It's called a fireball, man. Watch. 177 00:11:29,760 --> 00:11:31,839 Haystack, flame on, buddy. Flame on! 178 00:11:31,840 --> 00:11:34,088 Oh, now what? 179 00:11:36,520 --> 00:11:37,599 Whoo! 180 00:11:37,600 --> 00:11:38,999 Yeah! 181 00:11:39,000 --> 00:11:41,119 Can you do it again? Do it again! 182 00:11:41,120 --> 00:11:45,119 (CHANTING QUIETLY) Fireball, fireball, fireball, fireball. 183 00:11:45,120 --> 00:11:48,164 Fireball, fireball, fireball, fireball. 184 00:11:49,200 --> 00:11:50,279 (CHEERING) 185 00:11:50,280 --> 00:11:53,159 One more! One more! 186 00:11:53,160 --> 00:11:56,842 (CHANTING) Fireball! Fireball! Fireball! Fireball! 187 00:12:01,680 --> 00:12:04,167 ALL: Oh, shit! 188 00:12:09,640 --> 00:12:13,799 (SINGING) Our house Our house is burning down. 189 00:12:13,800 --> 00:12:19,000 Our house, our house Our house is burning down. 190 00:12:27,360 --> 00:12:29,559 Must've been the electrical wiring. 191 00:12:29,560 --> 00:12:31,999 That isn't what the fire department thinks, Stan. 192 00:12:32,000 --> 00:12:35,761 Dean Ulich, if my boys say it was the wiring, I gotta believe them. 193 00:12:35,880 --> 00:12:38,651 You know, Dean, this school ought to be more careful. 194 00:12:38,720 --> 00:12:41,519 Dean, we got a big game coming up 195 00:12:41,520 --> 00:12:44,679 and I don't want my boys' minds worried about where they're gonna live. 196 00:12:44,680 --> 00:12:48,399 Well, they should've thought of that before they burned their house down. 197 00:12:48,400 --> 00:12:51,649 Well, what's done is done. Now, where am I gonna put my athletes? 198 00:12:51,760 --> 00:12:55,726 - How about the freshman dorm? - What about the students living there now? 199 00:12:57,040 --> 00:12:58,241 BRAD: All right. 200 00:12:58,320 --> 00:13:01,519 Thanks to faulty wiring, we have no place to live, right? 201 00:13:01,520 --> 00:13:03,079 - Right! - And these freshmen... 202 00:13:03,080 --> 00:13:05,359 Freshmen are sitting pretty in there. 203 00:13:05,360 --> 00:13:08,479 - So as of now, that dorm is ours! Right? - Yeah! 204 00:13:08,480 --> 00:13:11,599 Any room you want! Ready? Break! 205 00:13:11,600 --> 00:13:13,689 (SCREAMING, HOLLERING) 206 00:13:19,760 --> 00:13:20,879 (SCREAMS) 207 00:13:20,880 --> 00:13:22,366 Don't come back! 208 00:13:22,640 --> 00:13:23,841 (SCREAMS) 209 00:13:23,880 --> 00:13:25,525 There's your roommate, pal! 210 00:13:29,560 --> 00:13:32,286 If everyone follows directions, 211 00:13:32,360 --> 00:13:37,361 we can manage this move with as little inconvenience as possible. 212 00:13:37,720 --> 00:13:40,079 All right, men. I want everybody to listen up. 213 00:13:40,080 --> 00:13:42,199 We're movin' out, and I mean now! 214 00:13:42,200 --> 00:13:45,768 Move it! Move it! Move! Move! Move! 215 00:13:46,920 --> 00:13:49,202 BOY: Hey, buddy! Here! 216 00:13:51,400 --> 00:13:53,568 - Get outta here! - Yeah! Move your ass! 217 00:13:53,640 --> 00:13:55,126 (WHISTLE BLOWS) 218 00:13:56,040 --> 00:13:57,844 COACH: All right, men. Listen up! 219 00:13:57,880 --> 00:14:01,959 I'm gonna see to it that each and every one of you is taken care of. 220 00:14:01,960 --> 00:14:06,290 You will be provided with the best possible food, shelter and accommodations. 221 00:14:06,920 --> 00:14:08,121 (LAUGHING) 222 00:14:08,480 --> 00:14:14,079 - We will try to provide you... - Now, let's move it out! Move it! Move! 223 00:14:14,080 --> 00:14:17,011 - Move! Move! Move it! - (ATHLETES JEERING) 224 00:14:20,560 --> 00:14:22,330 COACH: Move it! 225 00:14:24,440 --> 00:14:26,324 Get outta here! 226 00:14:26,440 --> 00:14:28,519 (CHANTING) Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! 227 00:14:28,520 --> 00:14:33,328 Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! 228 00:14:36,120 --> 00:14:38,004 (CHANTING CONTINUES) 229 00:14:44,400 --> 00:14:48,650 ULICH: I know this move has probably been very sudden for all of you 230 00:14:48,840 --> 00:14:52,159 and you're probably all still very disoriented. 231 00:14:52,160 --> 00:14:58,288 I do want to assure you that this move is in no way permanent. It's only temporary. 232 00:14:58,360 --> 00:15:02,039 As you can see, we've provided accommodations for you 233 00:15:02,040 --> 00:15:04,679 that are... That are quite acceptable 234 00:15:04,680 --> 00:15:07,599 and I think it'll be a very nice place for you to enjoy your studies. 235 00:15:07,600 --> 00:15:09,639 YOUNG BOY: But I don't even want to go to college! 236 00:15:09,640 --> 00:15:13,526 Harold, you have a special gift. You need college to develop it. 237 00:15:13,680 --> 00:15:15,799 I want to be with people my own age. 238 00:15:15,800 --> 00:15:18,839 You will be with people your own age when you're older. 239 00:15:18,840 --> 00:15:21,199 But you just can't drop me off in a gymnasium. 240 00:15:21,200 --> 00:15:23,799 It's like we're refugees from a war! 241 00:15:23,800 --> 00:15:27,199 We've got to go now, honey. Your dad has an appointment. 242 00:15:27,200 --> 00:15:28,959 Bye, son. 243 00:15:28,960 --> 00:15:30,519 (ULICH CONTINUES INDISTINCTLY) 244 00:15:30,520 --> 00:15:34,042 It is, really very comfortable here. 245 00:15:34,480 --> 00:15:37,047 Is there anyone here with allergies? 246 00:15:38,840 --> 00:15:42,599 Me too. Uh, for those who do have allergies, um... 247 00:15:42,600 --> 00:15:45,639 You can request a foam-rubber pillow. 248 00:15:45,640 --> 00:15:49,879 Also, there's a television, uh, for your viewing pleasure. 249 00:15:49,880 --> 00:15:53,482 It is a black-and-white television. More good news, 250 00:15:53,760 --> 00:15:57,646 because of the... Of the housing situation, 251 00:15:58,120 --> 00:16:01,559 we are allowing the freshman class to join and live in fraternities. 252 00:16:01,560 --> 00:16:02,639 STUDENTS: All right! 253 00:16:02,640 --> 00:16:06,208 The fraternities will select their new members tomorrow. 254 00:16:06,720 --> 00:16:08,046 (WHISTLE BLOWS) 255 00:16:08,600 --> 00:16:11,610 All right! Enough of this social bullshit. Grab a cot. 256 00:16:12,040 --> 00:16:13,844 Move it or lose it! 257 00:16:16,600 --> 00:16:18,290 Go, son. 258 00:16:18,720 --> 00:16:20,081 Move! 259 00:16:21,160 --> 00:16:23,966 Move! Move! Move! Move! Move! 260 00:16:28,480 --> 00:16:29,639 (BASKETBALLS BOUNCING) 261 00:16:29,640 --> 00:16:34,482 ULICH: The Delta Kappa Gamma fraternity has selected as its new members, 262 00:16:34,720 --> 00:16:37,605 Oliver Scott and Bill Daniels. 263 00:16:38,320 --> 00:16:43,447 For those of you, who weren't selected by any fraternities, 264 00:16:43,600 --> 00:16:46,319 you won't be left out in the cold. 265 00:16:46,320 --> 00:16:50,889 You can stay here in the gym for as long as you like. 266 00:16:52,080 --> 00:16:55,011 Or at least until basketball season. 267 00:16:56,240 --> 00:16:59,444 Please answer when I call out your names. 268 00:17:00,480 --> 00:17:03,251 Poindexter, Arnold? 269 00:17:04,960 --> 00:17:08,642 - Latrelle, Lamar. - Lamar Latrelle. 270 00:17:11,440 --> 00:17:14,999 - Wormser, Harold. - Present. 271 00:17:15,000 --> 00:17:19,091 - Takashi, Toshiro. - Here, sir. 272 00:17:21,720 --> 00:17:25,561 - Dawson, Dudley. - Call me Booger. 273 00:17:26,120 --> 00:17:28,607 All right, Booger. 274 00:17:28,960 --> 00:17:31,239 Rakhim, Taj. 275 00:17:31,240 --> 00:17:34,879 Excuse, please. But why do they call you Booger? 276 00:17:34,880 --> 00:17:37,401 I don't know. 277 00:17:38,160 --> 00:17:41,011 - Posquito, Lawrence. - (THUD) 278 00:17:43,040 --> 00:17:44,719 Daniels, Paul. 279 00:17:44,720 --> 00:17:47,161 I knew nobody'd pick us, Lewis. 280 00:17:47,640 --> 00:17:51,839 Gilbert, it's probably not over yet. There's a fraternity for us. 281 00:17:51,840 --> 00:17:54,361 - (ATHLETES CLAMORING) - ULICH: Dooley, Edward. 282 00:18:01,238 --> 00:18:03,039 Wait a second, Lewis. Are you sure about this? 283 00:18:03,040 --> 00:18:05,527 Gilbert, yes. Come on. 284 00:18:12,520 --> 00:18:17,248 - Hi, girls. - Are you guys looking to join a sorority? 285 00:18:17,560 --> 00:18:21,560 A sorority? (LAUGHS) No! Guy! 286 00:18:22,120 --> 00:18:23,924 We really need some help. 287 00:18:23,960 --> 00:18:28,245 We figured pretty girls like you might be able to suggest a fraternity. 288 00:18:28,520 --> 00:18:31,439 Well, you know, boys, choosing the right fraternal organization 289 00:18:31,440 --> 00:18:34,359 can be one of the most important decisions in a man's life. 290 00:18:34,360 --> 00:18:35,399 For sure. 291 00:18:35,400 --> 00:18:38,039 Guys like you have to weigh your choices very carefully. 292 00:18:38,040 --> 00:18:39,119 Definitely. 293 00:18:39,120 --> 00:18:41,243 What frat do you think is us? 294 00:18:41,360 --> 00:18:44,962 - You guys are Alpha Betas all the way. - Totally. For sure. 295 00:18:45,040 --> 00:18:49,599 Wait. Aren't Alpha Betas, like, all jocks and face men? 296 00:18:49,600 --> 00:18:54,679 Yes. But you guys have got that certain something I know they'd be interested in. 297 00:18:54,680 --> 00:18:56,439 I'm gonna call them and tell them you're coming. 298 00:18:56,440 --> 00:18:58,642 Should we ask for a particular Alpha Beta? 299 00:18:59,280 --> 00:19:01,926 - Stan Gable. - And you're? 300 00:19:02,360 --> 00:19:04,085 Betty Childs. 301 00:19:05,200 --> 00:19:07,519 Thank you, Betty. Uh, Miss Childs. 302 00:19:07,520 --> 00:19:10,999 Maybe if you're not busy sometime, we could have a cup of coffee or something. 303 00:19:11,000 --> 00:19:13,567 - Oh. - Come on, pal. 304 00:19:14,400 --> 00:19:17,285 GILBERT: I can't believe you asked her out. 305 00:19:17,880 --> 00:19:22,199 You know, Gilbert, if we get in, maybe we can have our old room back. 306 00:19:22,200 --> 00:19:25,799 - These guys are never gonna accept us. - Why wouldn't they? 307 00:19:25,800 --> 00:19:30,244 These are the Alpha Betas! They're the football players. 308 00:19:30,760 --> 00:19:34,119 Gilbert, I really don't think Miss Childs would have sent us over here 309 00:19:34,120 --> 00:19:36,679 if she didn't think we had a chance of getting in. 310 00:19:36,680 --> 00:19:37,881 (KNOCKS) 311 00:19:38,520 --> 00:19:39,721 (CREAKING) 312 00:19:40,160 --> 00:19:42,010 - Yes? - Hi. 313 00:19:42,320 --> 00:19:45,888 Tell Stan Gable that we're the guys that Betty Childs sent over. 314 00:19:46,840 --> 00:19:49,361 Follow me, boys. 315 00:19:52,480 --> 00:19:54,808 Gilbert. 316 00:20:22,320 --> 00:20:24,639 (IN UNISON) Welcome. 317 00:20:24,640 --> 00:20:26,365 - Hi. - Hi. 318 00:20:28,840 --> 00:20:30,405 (WHISPERING) Hey. 319 00:20:32,120 --> 00:20:35,403 You guys seem pretty cool. Take these for later. 320 00:20:38,320 --> 00:20:41,319 Rubbers? What do we need rubbers for? 321 00:20:41,320 --> 00:20:42,931 (SHEEP BLEATS) 322 00:20:46,520 --> 00:20:48,848 BRAD: Let the initiation begin. 323 00:20:49,600 --> 00:20:51,723 BRAD: (ECHOING) Have you ever made love to a woman? 324 00:20:52,520 --> 00:20:54,529 - Yes. No. - No. Yes. 325 00:20:56,840 --> 00:20:58,479 Liars! 326 00:20:58,480 --> 00:20:59,559 (VIOLIN SQUEAKING) 327 00:20:59,560 --> 00:21:01,399 WOMAN: (ON TV) All right, girls. Let's go for the burn. 328 00:21:01,400 --> 00:21:04,239 Let's get skinny! And one! And two! 329 00:21:04,240 --> 00:21:06,319 And three! And four! 330 00:21:06,320 --> 00:21:08,879 And one! And two! And three! 331 00:21:08,880 --> 00:21:12,399 - Okay, Takashi, what do you got? - Oh, I think I have a "frush." 332 00:21:12,400 --> 00:21:15,519 - What the fuck is a frush? - A "frush." 333 00:21:15,520 --> 00:21:17,919 Oh, see, I got two sevens, and two sevens beats a frush. 334 00:21:17,920 --> 00:21:19,485 Oh, thank you. 335 00:21:20,480 --> 00:21:24,039 One, two, three, four! 336 00:21:24,040 --> 00:21:29,121 One, two, three, four! Come on, girls! Fat is your enemy! 337 00:21:29,320 --> 00:21:31,204 Hold those arms out straight! 338 00:21:33,160 --> 00:21:34,771 - Oh. - Jesus. 339 00:21:37,280 --> 00:21:38,766 (VIOLIN SCRAPES) 340 00:21:40,040 --> 00:21:42,559 Smile, girls! You're gonna be beautiful! 341 00:21:42,560 --> 00:21:45,331 One! And two! And three! And four! 342 00:21:45,680 --> 00:21:51,410 So, getting into a fraternity can be the most important thing in a man's life, huh? 343 00:21:51,440 --> 00:21:54,610 You know, that cheerleader set us up, Lewis. 344 00:21:55,080 --> 00:21:58,602 I really don't think Betty Childs is that kind of person, Gilbert. 345 00:22:01,600 --> 00:22:05,600 - Hey, Lewis. - What is it, Gilbert? 346 00:22:06,920 --> 00:22:09,248 I'm really sorry that I snapped at you. 347 00:22:09,400 --> 00:22:11,279 This gym's really gettin' to me. 348 00:22:11,280 --> 00:22:16,008 It's okay. I understand. Tomorrow morning, we'll find a better place to live, okay? 349 00:22:17,920 --> 00:22:21,841 - Good night, Gilbert. - Good night, Lewis. 350 00:22:21,920 --> 00:22:24,759 - WORMSER: Good night, Lamar. - LAMAR: Good night, Wormser. 351 00:22:24,760 --> 00:22:28,639 - POINDEXTER: Night, Takashi. - TAKASHI: Good night, Poindexter. 352 00:22:28,640 --> 00:22:31,127 - Night, Booger. - (BOOGER BELCHES) 353 00:22:32,120 --> 00:22:33,685 (BOYS LAUGHING) 354 00:22:35,800 --> 00:22:37,001 (TYPING) 355 00:22:38,240 --> 00:22:39,930 (THUDDING) 356 00:22:45,960 --> 00:22:48,319 Hey, take it easy. 357 00:22:48,320 --> 00:22:50,119 The computer's your friend. 358 00:22:50,120 --> 00:22:52,639 I wasn't meant to interface with a machine. 359 00:22:52,640 --> 00:22:55,411 Well, you're just beginning. Relax. 360 00:22:56,280 --> 00:22:57,799 It's no use. 361 00:22:57,800 --> 00:23:00,439 - It's inhuman. - Oh, it's not inhuman. 362 00:23:00,440 --> 00:23:03,159 Only humans can be inhuman. 363 00:23:03,160 --> 00:23:04,725 Here. Lemme show you. 364 00:23:09,840 --> 00:23:12,639 Working with a computer's great. 365 00:23:12,640 --> 00:23:15,684 - I mean, it's, uh, godlike in a way. - (GIGGLES) 366 00:23:15,760 --> 00:23:18,850 'Cause you can have complete control. 367 00:23:19,120 --> 00:23:21,004 - (BEEPING) - (CHUCKLES) 368 00:23:21,200 --> 00:23:23,607 - That's good. - Thanks. 369 00:23:25,440 --> 00:23:29,639 You know, some people, they can create with their hands. 370 00:23:29,640 --> 00:23:34,164 But when you're working with a computer, you gotta build something with your mind. 371 00:23:36,280 --> 00:23:39,119 If you're good, you can do somethin' no one's ever seen before. 372 00:23:39,120 --> 00:23:40,321 (BEEPING) 373 00:23:41,160 --> 00:23:42,930 It's a definite high. 374 00:23:47,440 --> 00:23:48,641 (CHUCKLES) 375 00:23:50,480 --> 00:23:54,479 - Uh, what's your name? - Judy. 376 00:23:54,480 --> 00:23:56,199 Hi, Judy. Gilbert. 377 00:23:56,200 --> 00:23:59,768 - Very nice to meet you. - Nice meeting you. 378 00:24:00,000 --> 00:24:03,279 - Joe, what are you doing here? - Hiya, boys. 379 00:24:03,280 --> 00:24:04,891 (BASKETBALLS BOUNCING) 380 00:24:06,080 --> 00:24:08,442 - Hello, Lewis. - Hi, Gilbert. 381 00:24:09,680 --> 00:24:10,879 Did you find a house? 382 00:24:10,880 --> 00:24:14,163 No. I met a girl. 383 00:24:14,720 --> 00:24:17,039 Gilbert. 384 00:24:17,040 --> 00:24:20,599 - Her name's Judy. - Judy's a nice name, Gilbert. 385 00:24:20,600 --> 00:24:24,486 - Yeah. She's a nice girl. - Big deal. Did you get in her pants? 386 00:24:24,640 --> 00:24:28,401 - She's not that kind of a girl, Booger. - Why? Does she have a penis? 387 00:24:33,080 --> 00:24:34,850 You gonna eat this? 388 00:24:38,320 --> 00:24:39,851 (WATER RUNNING) 389 00:24:40,200 --> 00:24:43,719 - Smell this one, nerd. - Hey, Coach, Coach, 390 00:24:43,720 --> 00:24:47,129 I got to find a place to live. Is okay I leave early? 391 00:24:47,560 --> 00:24:48,761 No. 392 00:24:49,880 --> 00:24:51,081 Oh, okay. 393 00:24:52,400 --> 00:24:53,919 - You know karate? - Oh, no. 394 00:24:53,920 --> 00:24:56,600 Good. 395 00:24:58,840 --> 00:25:02,123 LEWIS: Okay, I programmed him with all the rental units in the area. 396 00:25:02,160 --> 00:25:03,479 To achieve optimum efficiency, 397 00:25:03,480 --> 00:25:06,159 I've assigned each of you a different part of the list. 398 00:25:06,160 --> 00:25:09,921 This'll prevent doubling up, and we'll be able to blanket the area in no time. 399 00:25:10,760 --> 00:25:12,962 Booger. 400 00:25:13,560 --> 00:25:15,762 Wormser. 401 00:25:16,720 --> 00:25:18,410 Toshiro. 402 00:25:24,840 --> 00:25:26,530 (SPEAKING JAPANESE) 403 00:25:28,760 --> 00:25:30,610 (SPEAKING JAPANESE) 404 00:25:31,680 --> 00:25:32,881 Nerd. 405 00:25:44,520 --> 00:25:46,722 - Hi. - Hi. 406 00:25:47,040 --> 00:25:49,846 - Mr. Wilson? - Yeah. 407 00:25:52,080 --> 00:25:53,645 Just checking. 408 00:25:54,800 --> 00:25:56,843 WOMAN: Hi, there, big boy. 409 00:25:57,040 --> 00:26:00,847 Hi. I came about the room for rent. 410 00:26:01,000 --> 00:26:05,410 It's right next to mine. It'll be perfect for us. 411 00:26:08,440 --> 00:26:10,085 (DOORBELL BUZZES) 412 00:26:12,560 --> 00:26:14,250 Who's there? 413 00:26:14,680 --> 00:26:16,239 - I... - What do you want? 414 00:26:16,240 --> 00:26:17,999 - Is this the Stewart residence? - Why are you here? 415 00:26:18,000 --> 00:26:21,409 - I've come about the room. - What do you want? Go... Go away! 416 00:26:22,000 --> 00:26:24,919 - I... I... Do you have a room to rent? - Not for rent. 417 00:26:24,920 --> 00:26:27,361 - I thought it was for rent. - Fuck off. 418 00:26:35,280 --> 00:26:37,439 - Hi, Judy. - Hi, Gilbert! 419 00:26:37,440 --> 00:26:39,039 - How are you? - I'm fine. 420 00:26:39,040 --> 00:26:40,159 - Good. - Where you goin'? 421 00:26:40,160 --> 00:26:42,359 I gotta go find a place to live. 422 00:26:42,360 --> 00:26:44,839 Oh, that's horrible, you guys having to live in the gym. 423 00:26:44,840 --> 00:26:46,371 Oh, yeah, well... 424 00:26:47,520 --> 00:26:50,599 - What is that? Is that yours? - Oh, it's my accordion. 425 00:26:50,600 --> 00:26:52,679 - The... You play the accordion? - Yeah! 426 00:26:52,680 --> 00:26:54,359 - You know, I love the accordion. - Really? 427 00:26:54,360 --> 00:26:56,562 Yeah. Are you very good, or... 428 00:26:57,080 --> 00:26:58,799 - No, not really. - Oh. 429 00:26:58,800 --> 00:27:01,759 I'm on my way to accordion class now. Wanna walk with me? 430 00:27:01,760 --> 00:27:04,531 Yeah, sure. Oh, no. Here. Let me get it. 431 00:27:12,040 --> 00:27:14,607 - I think I found a house. - (CHEERING) 432 00:27:15,480 --> 00:27:17,682 BOOGER: About fucking time! 433 00:27:22,640 --> 00:27:24,444 Isn't it fantastic? 434 00:27:28,680 --> 00:27:30,484 (POP SONG PLAYING) 435 00:27:50,640 --> 00:27:51,966 Welcome. 436 00:28:10,720 --> 00:28:14,845 - You feeling anything yet, Takashi? - Booger, I feel nothing. 437 00:28:15,000 --> 00:28:17,328 Well, you better have another hit. 438 00:28:28,280 --> 00:28:30,926 Look at this counter. Could be good. 439 00:28:32,160 --> 00:28:33,361 (COUGHS) 440 00:28:40,480 --> 00:28:41,681 (SCREAMS) 441 00:28:46,000 --> 00:28:48,726 - Feeling anything now? - Oh, no. 442 00:28:49,160 --> 00:28:54,730 I feeling nothing at all. 443 00:28:55,440 --> 00:28:57,165 How about now? 444 00:29:23,560 --> 00:29:24,759 (POP SONG FADES) 445 00:29:24,760 --> 00:29:27,804 I can't believe what they've done to that house. 446 00:29:28,240 --> 00:29:29,851 That's amazing. 447 00:29:30,680 --> 00:29:33,079 - Looks terrific, doesn't it, Stan? - STAN: Yeah. 448 00:29:33,080 --> 00:29:35,408 Well, it won't look terrific for long. 449 00:29:36,520 --> 00:29:38,882 What are you looking at, nerd? Huh? 450 00:29:41,520 --> 00:29:45,725 I thought I was looking at my mother's old douche bag, but that's in Ohio. 451 00:29:47,040 --> 00:29:50,279 Seven, and eight, and stretch those arms. 452 00:29:50,280 --> 00:29:53,679 (TALKING IN RHYTHM) Come on, looks great. Come on, Wormser. 453 00:29:53,680 --> 00:29:56,645 Count one. Keep it up. Two... 454 00:29:59,480 --> 00:30:01,199 - Good morning, Poindexter. - (GRUNTS) 455 00:30:01,200 --> 00:30:02,925 - Good morning. - Okay. 456 00:30:04,120 --> 00:30:06,322 (GRUNTS) Excuse me. 457 00:30:10,560 --> 00:30:12,799 Oh, thank you very much. 458 00:30:12,800 --> 00:30:14,001 (BEEPS) 459 00:30:15,920 --> 00:30:19,599 - Okay, Takashi, show me your cards. - Okay. Two and four kings. 460 00:30:19,600 --> 00:30:22,399 - That's good, yes? Oh. - No. No, you got too many kings. 461 00:30:22,400 --> 00:30:23,959 - You gotta get rid of these. - Oh. 462 00:30:23,960 --> 00:30:29,239 I'll take three of these kings out, and we'll replace them with three fresh cards. 463 00:30:29,240 --> 00:30:32,119 Oh. Okay. Thank you. 464 00:30:32,120 --> 00:30:34,322 Okay, when do I deal? 465 00:30:34,520 --> 00:30:36,079 BOOGER: You gotta win a hand first. 466 00:30:36,080 --> 00:30:39,039 I told you we'd find a better place. 467 00:30:39,040 --> 00:30:42,244 Yeah. This is way better than the dorm. 468 00:30:43,080 --> 00:30:44,441 (GLASS SHATTERS) 469 00:30:44,680 --> 00:30:46,370 (MOTORCYCLE SPEEDING AWAY) 470 00:30:52,440 --> 00:30:54,642 It says, "Nerds, get out." 471 00:30:55,360 --> 00:30:57,119 What is a nerd? 472 00:30:57,120 --> 00:30:58,810 We are. 473 00:31:00,520 --> 00:31:04,566 I don't know what this world is comin' to. See that man over there? 474 00:31:04,960 --> 00:31:06,730 We arrested him for mopery. 475 00:31:07,760 --> 00:31:09,086 What's mopery? 476 00:31:09,120 --> 00:31:12,130 Mopery is exposing yourself to a blind person. 477 00:31:14,680 --> 00:31:16,799 I'm sorry about your windows, fellas. 478 00:31:16,800 --> 00:31:20,800 It's out of my jurisdiction. Sounds like a fraternity prank. 479 00:31:21,080 --> 00:31:23,279 There's only one organization that can handle this. 480 00:31:23,280 --> 00:31:24,845 What organization is that? 481 00:31:27,280 --> 00:31:28,481 The Greek Council. 482 00:31:29,280 --> 00:31:33,007 Our next order of business, new membership. 483 00:31:33,400 --> 00:31:36,331 Earl, show the petitioners in, please. 484 00:31:43,120 --> 00:31:44,606 GIRL: Oh, my God. 485 00:31:45,480 --> 00:31:47,170 (SNICKERING) 486 00:31:49,160 --> 00:31:50,725 (SHUSHING) 487 00:31:53,880 --> 00:31:55,445 Kneel, gentlemen. 488 00:32:02,800 --> 00:32:05,731 You are the gentlemen who wish to form a fraternity? 489 00:32:06,160 --> 00:32:08,010 ALL: Yes, sir. 490 00:32:13,560 --> 00:32:16,319 Well, gentlemen, as president of the Greek Council, 491 00:32:16,320 --> 00:32:19,888 I'm sorry to inform you that your membership has been denied. 492 00:32:19,920 --> 00:32:22,248 Excuse me, but, uh, why? 493 00:32:22,440 --> 00:32:26,759 Well, according to our charter, you must have a national fraternity as your sponsor. 494 00:32:26,760 --> 00:32:29,361 - Do you have one? - ALL: No. 495 00:32:31,760 --> 00:32:33,159 Well, I'm afraid he's right. 496 00:32:33,160 --> 00:32:35,999 But all we have to do is get a national sponsor, and we're in, right? 497 00:32:36,000 --> 00:32:41,119 Right, right. So I guess we'll see you in about, say, uh, 20 years. 498 00:32:41,120 --> 00:32:42,321 (LAUGHING) 499 00:32:44,800 --> 00:32:46,490 (VIOLIN SQUEAKING) 500 00:32:50,160 --> 00:32:53,762 "Dear sirs, thank you for applying to Delta Kappa Gamma." 501 00:32:54,240 --> 00:32:59,239 "We've gone over your application, and it wasn't even close." 502 00:32:59,240 --> 00:33:03,079 "In the future, we recommend that you not include a group photo." 503 00:33:03,080 --> 00:33:05,719 That's 29 rejections so far. 504 00:33:05,720 --> 00:33:08,719 Did we send pictures to everybody? 505 00:33:08,720 --> 00:33:13,319 Yeah, everybody except for, uh, Lambda Lambda Lambda. 506 00:33:13,320 --> 00:33:14,965 Here's one that will see us! 507 00:33:16,080 --> 00:33:17,770 IN UNISON: Lambda Lambda Lambda? 508 00:33:17,920 --> 00:33:20,441 Yeah. They're gonna love us. 509 00:33:26,080 --> 00:33:28,919 As you know, we have no chapter at Adams College, 510 00:33:28,920 --> 00:33:31,122 which is why we agreed to see you. 511 00:33:31,520 --> 00:33:33,119 But I must tell you, gentlemen, 512 00:33:33,120 --> 00:33:37,644 you have very little chance of becoming Tri-Lambs. 513 00:33:38,120 --> 00:33:41,005 I'm in a difficult situation here. 514 00:33:41,400 --> 00:33:43,839 I mean, after all, 515 00:33:43,840 --> 00:33:46,327 you're nerds. 516 00:33:47,560 --> 00:33:49,519 According to your by-laws, 517 00:33:49,520 --> 00:33:52,929 you have to take us on a 60-day trial basis. 518 00:33:53,400 --> 00:33:56,559 - I beg your pardon? - According to your by-law... 519 00:33:56,560 --> 00:33:58,039 He's right, U.N. 520 00:33:58,040 --> 00:34:02,006 Any group that petitions can become a probationary Tri-Lamb chapter. 521 00:34:02,720 --> 00:34:04,001 May I see that, please? 522 00:34:06,360 --> 00:34:08,961 (SIGHS) Thank you. 523 00:34:15,280 --> 00:34:19,639 Well, gentlemen, you are now probationary Tri-Lambs. 524 00:34:19,640 --> 00:34:21,842 - (MURMURING) - Hey, great, U.N. 525 00:34:22,000 --> 00:34:25,239 Why don't we have a party? You can come down and celebrate with us 526 00:34:25,240 --> 00:34:27,999 and observe us to make sure we're Tri-Lamb material, okay? 527 00:34:28,000 --> 00:34:29,079 Great. 528 00:34:29,080 --> 00:34:30,399 We won't let you down either. 529 00:34:30,400 --> 00:34:33,524 I bet we'll have the highest grade point average of any chapter you've got. 530 00:34:34,240 --> 00:34:36,319 And we certainly won't discriminate. 531 00:34:36,320 --> 00:34:40,199 I mean, our chapter will be open to people of all races and creeds. 532 00:34:40,200 --> 00:34:42,368 And sexual orientation. 533 00:34:44,320 --> 00:34:45,851 Wonderful. 534 00:34:46,840 --> 00:34:48,963 - (GIRLS LAUGHING) - (DOORBELL RINGS) 535 00:34:53,960 --> 00:34:56,999 - Hi. Remember me? - No. 536 00:34:57,000 --> 00:35:00,727 Well, we're having a party Saturday night. Would you like to come? 537 00:35:01,520 --> 00:35:03,768 - No. - Oh. Well... 538 00:35:07,040 --> 00:35:09,919 Come on! Get it up! Get it up! Come on! You're shit! 539 00:35:09,920 --> 00:35:12,399 You're nothin'! You're scum! You suck! 540 00:35:12,400 --> 00:35:15,639 - You're nice! - No, I'm not! (GRUNTS) 541 00:35:15,640 --> 00:35:17,479 - That a way, Og. - Stan. Hi. 542 00:35:17,480 --> 00:35:20,439 - What's up, Betty? Somethin' wrong? - Yeah. 543 00:35:20,440 --> 00:35:22,927 - What? - One of those nerds just asked me out. 544 00:35:23,840 --> 00:35:25,039 (CHUCKLES) Which one? 545 00:35:25,040 --> 00:35:27,919 - I don't know. They all look alike to me. - Yeah. 546 00:35:27,920 --> 00:35:30,679 They're trying to throw a party, and they can't get any dates. 547 00:35:30,680 --> 00:35:33,451 - Yeah? - (GROWLS) I'll eat their ancestors! 548 00:35:33,560 --> 00:35:36,719 - I'll kill their parents! I'll kill... - No, Ogre! Ogre! 549 00:35:36,720 --> 00:35:39,082 Don't worry about it. Wait a second. Just wait a second. 550 00:35:42,080 --> 00:35:44,879 - Maybe we could help them out. - Yeah? 551 00:35:44,880 --> 00:35:49,399 Yeah. And I know just what to do. 552 00:35:49,400 --> 00:35:51,090 Come here. 553 00:35:55,480 --> 00:35:59,439 We'll put the bar over here, and the hors d'oeuvres over there. 554 00:35:59,440 --> 00:36:02,079 And we'll pass the rumaki and the cheese puffs. 555 00:36:02,080 --> 00:36:05,599 - That sounds expensive. - Arnold, this party's important. 556 00:36:05,600 --> 00:36:07,759 If we don't impress the Tri-Lambs, we'll never get in. 557 00:36:07,760 --> 00:36:10,479 Maybe we can have "robster craws." 558 00:36:10,480 --> 00:36:12,679 What the fuck are robster craws? 559 00:36:12,680 --> 00:36:15,079 Have any of you guys got dates besides Gilbert? 560 00:36:15,080 --> 00:36:17,647 - I do. - Yeah, but that's with a guy. 561 00:36:18,160 --> 00:36:19,599 What about you, Booger? 562 00:36:19,600 --> 00:36:22,041 I been out combin' the high schools all day. 563 00:36:23,000 --> 00:36:24,804 Maybe we should cancel the party. 564 00:36:25,160 --> 00:36:29,519 No, we can't cancel the party. U.N. Jefferson's coming. We got to impress him. 565 00:36:29,520 --> 00:36:31,882 We'll never find dates. 566 00:36:32,320 --> 00:36:36,319 (SINGING) Hello, Lambda We're the Pi's. 567 00:36:36,320 --> 00:36:40,002 And we're here to say. 568 00:36:40,200 --> 00:36:43,599 We think you are special guys. 569 00:36:43,600 --> 00:36:47,009 Lambdas all the way. 570 00:36:47,080 --> 00:36:50,399 Alpha Betas are okay. 571 00:36:50,400 --> 00:36:53,001 If you like sweat socks. 572 00:36:53,200 --> 00:36:56,959 We prefer your high I.Q.'s. 573 00:36:56,960 --> 00:37:00,130 To their great big jocks. 574 00:37:00,280 --> 00:37:04,199 Lambda Lambda Lambda boys. 575 00:37:04,200 --> 00:37:07,483 Really are the best. 576 00:37:07,640 --> 00:37:11,319 Won't you take a piece of Pi. 577 00:37:11,320 --> 00:37:15,399 And we'll do the rest. 578 00:37:15,400 --> 00:37:20,199 The sisters of Pi welcome our newest fraternity, Lambda Lambda Lambda. 579 00:37:20,200 --> 00:37:22,880 We'd like to be escorts to your party Saturday night 580 00:37:22,881 --> 00:37:26,004 and help out in any way possible. 581 00:37:26,680 --> 00:37:28,211 (HUMMING) 582 00:37:30,160 --> 00:37:33,839 - We got dates! - I never been out with a girl before. 583 00:37:33,840 --> 00:37:37,039 Not just a girl, Poindexter, but a Pi. 584 00:37:37,040 --> 00:37:39,799 - What's Pi stand for? - Hair pie. 585 00:37:39,800 --> 00:37:41,126 What's that? 586 00:37:45,920 --> 00:37:47,121 Oh. 587 00:37:48,440 --> 00:37:50,165 (POP SONG PLAYING) 588 00:37:57,200 --> 00:37:59,519 - Lewis, where are the Pi's? - I don't know. 589 00:37:59,520 --> 00:38:02,007 Their phone's been busy for two hours. 590 00:38:02,560 --> 00:38:05,959 I don't think U.N.'s having a very good time. 591 00:38:05,960 --> 00:38:08,731 Must be the music. I'll put on something he'll like better. 592 00:38:12,360 --> 00:38:13,719 - Lewis. - U.N.? 593 00:38:13,720 --> 00:38:14,839 (RECORD SCRATCHES) 594 00:38:14,840 --> 00:38:17,088 - Great party. - Thanks. 595 00:38:17,640 --> 00:38:20,810 Where are those good-lookin' sorority girls you're supposed to have dates with? 596 00:38:20,920 --> 00:38:24,841 You know women. They're probably just being fashionably late. 597 00:38:24,960 --> 00:38:26,969 (PIANO MUSIC PLAYING) 598 00:38:28,440 --> 00:38:33,885 (SINGING) Swing low, sweet chariot 599 00:38:33,920 --> 00:38:35,565 (RECORD SCRATCHES) 600 00:38:37,240 --> 00:38:40,239 - I don't think the Pi's are gonna show. - They stood us up, huh? 601 00:38:40,240 --> 00:38:42,879 - Yeah. - I could call my sorority sisters. 602 00:38:42,880 --> 00:38:45,079 - You could? - You think they'll come right over? 603 00:38:45,080 --> 00:38:48,759 They're really spontaneous people. I'll call 'em. 604 00:38:48,760 --> 00:38:50,759 - (POP SONG RESUMES) - Crush this ice for me, will you? 605 00:38:50,760 --> 00:38:54,119 - (LAUGHS) Hey, guys, we got dates. - Who? 606 00:38:54,120 --> 00:38:58,039 - Judy's gonna invite the Omega Mu's over. - Oh, no. Not the Mu's! 607 00:38:58,040 --> 00:39:00,686 - Yeah. - They're a bunch of pigs. 608 00:39:00,840 --> 00:39:03,042 - (SCREAMING) - (BLENDER GRINDING) 609 00:39:05,080 --> 00:39:06,645 (DOORBELL RINGS) 610 00:39:08,640 --> 00:39:10,126 (POP SONG ENDS) 611 00:39:17,760 --> 00:39:19,325 - Hi. - Hi. 612 00:39:25,400 --> 00:39:27,807 - Hi there. - Hi there. 613 00:39:30,120 --> 00:39:32,322 - Hi. - Hi. 614 00:39:37,280 --> 00:39:38,925 (ROCK SONG PLAYING) 615 00:40:08,440 --> 00:40:10,369 (VIOLIN SQUEAKING) 616 00:40:25,440 --> 00:40:28,239 JUDY: You can all sing along. The words are really easy. 617 00:40:28,240 --> 00:40:32,047 So I say I gotta be free. So I say I got... I gotta be me. 618 00:40:32,240 --> 00:40:37,401 - (SINGING) So I say I gotta be free. - Free. 619 00:40:38,080 --> 00:40:42,410 - So I say I gotta be me. - Me. 620 00:40:43,040 --> 00:40:44,571 I'm saying... 621 00:40:45,520 --> 00:40:48,883 I'm saying you gotta be... 622 00:40:57,040 --> 00:40:59,163 GILBERT: This party isn't going very well, is it? 623 00:40:59,640 --> 00:41:01,922 I don't know why everybody's so uptight. 624 00:41:02,480 --> 00:41:05,650 Me either. Maybe we should eat. 625 00:41:05,840 --> 00:41:08,407 Maybe we should watch TV. 626 00:41:08,440 --> 00:41:10,961 Hey, guys. 627 00:41:12,400 --> 00:41:14,523 Wonder joints. 628 00:41:15,240 --> 00:41:16,885 (POP SONG PLAYING) 629 00:41:25,400 --> 00:41:27,284 (CHATTERING, HOOTING) 630 00:41:35,360 --> 00:41:37,961 They taste better than they look. 631 00:41:39,120 --> 00:41:40,919 Oh, goody! 632 00:41:40,920 --> 00:41:43,159 Oh, smile pretty, chickies. 633 00:41:43,160 --> 00:41:45,639 Oh, thank you very much. Thank you, thank you. 634 00:41:45,640 --> 00:41:48,127 Hair pie. Hair pie. 635 00:41:49,040 --> 00:41:50,401 (BUBBLING) 636 00:41:52,600 --> 00:41:54,006 (LAUGHING) 637 00:41:58,560 --> 00:42:00,205 Nothing. Nothing. 638 00:42:02,560 --> 00:42:04,330 - Ah! - (GIGGLES) 639 00:42:07,120 --> 00:42:09,129 (LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY) 640 00:42:11,280 --> 00:42:13,599 And I have a micon data link 641 00:42:13,600 --> 00:42:16,041 which hooks this phone to the computer in the robot. 642 00:42:24,440 --> 00:42:27,689 Hey, this is some good shit. 643 00:42:30,000 --> 00:42:32,519 Hair pie? Thank you. 644 00:42:32,520 --> 00:42:34,245 Oh, hair pie? 645 00:42:34,480 --> 00:42:36,759 - You built this yourself? - Yeah. 646 00:42:36,760 --> 00:42:39,964 - I think robots are sexy. - (LAUGHS) 647 00:42:40,600 --> 00:42:43,119 I do too, really. 648 00:42:43,120 --> 00:42:46,369 - Do you wanna dance? - Okay. 649 00:42:46,840 --> 00:42:48,724 (POP SONG CONTINUES) 650 00:43:37,800 --> 00:43:41,243 Damn! You Mu's sure can party! 651 00:43:52,880 --> 00:43:54,719 - Come on. Let's go. - Where? 652 00:43:54,720 --> 00:43:56,959 - Up to your room. - You wanna go up to my room? 653 00:43:56,960 --> 00:43:58,161 Yeah. 654 00:43:58,440 --> 00:43:59,559 (SONG FADES) 655 00:43:59,560 --> 00:44:02,999 - Are you nearsighted or farsighted? - Nearsighted. 656 00:44:03,000 --> 00:44:05,239 - So am I. - Really? 657 00:44:05,240 --> 00:44:08,250 Yeah. You wanna switch glasses? 658 00:44:12,560 --> 00:44:14,999 Gilbert, we almost have the same prescription. 659 00:44:15,000 --> 00:44:19,439 Yeah. Listen, um, would you like to dance? 660 00:44:19,440 --> 00:44:20,641 Yeah. 661 00:44:21,800 --> 00:44:23,959 Yeah, well, uh, when I was in high school, 662 00:44:23,960 --> 00:44:26,970 I was thinking mostly of the, uh, aerospace field. 663 00:44:27,120 --> 00:44:30,039 But when I got into college, I decided that I wanted something 664 00:44:30,040 --> 00:44:31,839 a little more challenging. 665 00:44:31,840 --> 00:44:34,646 So, um, I switched to computers. 666 00:44:35,000 --> 00:44:38,443 And, uh, now aerodynamics is just sort of a hobby. 667 00:44:44,320 --> 00:44:45,806 (BALLAD PLAYING) 668 00:45:03,040 --> 00:45:06,119 Wait, wait. No, no, wait. 669 00:45:06,120 --> 00:45:11,167 Would you rather live in the ascendancy of a civilization or during its decline? 670 00:45:11,200 --> 00:45:15,450 Poindexter, do you wanna fuck or not? 671 00:45:16,240 --> 00:45:18,124 - (GROWLS) - (SCREAMS) 672 00:45:38,960 --> 00:45:41,719 You know, if, uh, we get into Lambda Lambda Lambda 673 00:45:41,720 --> 00:45:43,839 we could be your partners in the homecoming carnival. 674 00:45:43,840 --> 00:45:46,168 I know. That'd be so great. 675 00:45:46,480 --> 00:45:48,284 Yeah. This party sure worked out well. 676 00:45:49,160 --> 00:45:50,646 (SNORTING) 677 00:45:53,440 --> 00:45:54,971 (SCREAMING) 678 00:45:58,280 --> 00:46:00,209 Get 'em out of here! 679 00:46:03,640 --> 00:46:05,205 (SCREAMING CONTINUES) 680 00:46:06,400 --> 00:46:07,931 (SQUEALING) 681 00:46:12,640 --> 00:46:17,641 (SINGING) Old MacDonald had a farm E-I-E-I-O. 682 00:46:18,440 --> 00:46:23,039 And on that farm he had some pigs. E-I-E-I-O. 683 00:46:23,040 --> 00:46:26,919 We thought you could use some more pigs for your party, nerds. 684 00:46:26,920 --> 00:46:30,039 With an oink, oink here and an oink, oink there. 685 00:46:30,040 --> 00:46:33,039 Here an oink, there an oink Everywhere an oink, oink. 686 00:46:33,040 --> 00:46:38,121 Old MacDonald had a farm E-I-E-I-O. 687 00:46:42,040 --> 00:46:44,925 - Fuck you! - Fucking-A! 688 00:46:47,240 --> 00:46:49,090 Fuck you! 689 00:46:50,480 --> 00:46:53,524 We'll never get into Lambda Lambda Lambda now. 690 00:46:54,120 --> 00:46:56,721 Yeah, those jocks ruined everything. 691 00:46:57,160 --> 00:46:59,840 I say we blow their fucking houses up. 692 00:47:00,320 --> 00:47:03,079 No, we can't resort to violence. 693 00:47:03,080 --> 00:47:05,439 That'll just bring us down to their level. 694 00:47:05,440 --> 00:47:09,565 - What do we do? - We got to beat 'em at their own game. 695 00:47:10,680 --> 00:47:13,611 We've got to become the best fraternity on campus. 696 00:47:13,760 --> 00:47:17,919 You know, if we win that homecoming carnival, 697 00:47:17,920 --> 00:47:20,799 we can take over the presidency of the Greek Council. 698 00:47:20,800 --> 00:47:22,650 That would drive 'em crazy. 699 00:47:23,880 --> 00:47:24,959 But, Gilbert, 700 00:47:24,960 --> 00:47:28,562 if we don't get approved by the Tri-Lambs, we won't even be a fraternity. 701 00:47:29,440 --> 00:47:32,962 - I say we blow the fuckers up. - No, we can't do that. 702 00:47:33,280 --> 00:47:36,450 But you're right. Their action tonight 703 00:47:37,440 --> 00:47:40,564 demands an immediate retaliation. 704 00:47:42,160 --> 00:47:46,331 And if we don't, we're nothing but the nerds they say we are. 705 00:47:48,560 --> 00:47:51,570 I know what we're gonna do. 706 00:48:00,360 --> 00:48:02,722 LEWIS: (WHISPERING) Down! Down! Down! 707 00:48:05,600 --> 00:48:07,165 Come on! 708 00:48:32,440 --> 00:48:33,641 (GRUNTS) 709 00:48:47,680 --> 00:48:49,999 (SINGING) E-I-E-I-O. 710 00:48:50,000 --> 00:48:52,159 With an oink, oink here And an oink, oink there. 711 00:48:52,160 --> 00:48:54,408 Here an oink Everywhere an oink, oink 712 00:48:56,160 --> 00:48:58,681 - (WHISPERING) Where? - Right there. 713 00:48:59,880 --> 00:49:03,880 - Isn't this gonna make a lot of noise? - It's got a built-in silencer. 714 00:49:04,760 --> 00:49:06,246 (QUIET BUZZING) 715 00:49:21,200 --> 00:49:23,767 Camera. The periscope. 716 00:49:30,320 --> 00:49:32,887 - Hey, Suzy. - Hi, Betty. 717 00:49:33,000 --> 00:49:34,319 God, that was fun tonight. 718 00:49:34,320 --> 00:49:36,759 - We were the highlight of their party. - I know. 719 00:49:36,760 --> 00:49:39,879 - God, those pigs sure were greasy, too. - I have to get the smell off. 720 00:49:39,880 --> 00:49:41,399 - Oh, I know. - (GROANS) 721 00:49:41,400 --> 00:49:43,919 Listen, if Stan calls, tell him I'll call him back, okay? 722 00:49:43,920 --> 00:49:45,167 Okay. 723 00:49:49,240 --> 00:49:50,679 - (GASPS) - Panty raid! 724 00:49:50,680 --> 00:49:53,201 - (SCREAMS) - (LAUGHING) 725 00:49:55,400 --> 00:49:56,719 It's a panty raid! 726 00:49:56,720 --> 00:49:58,445 Panty raid! 727 00:50:05,040 --> 00:50:06,679 - (BOTH SCREAM) - Hey! 728 00:50:06,680 --> 00:50:09,079 What are you... What are you doing? 729 00:50:09,080 --> 00:50:12,284 Give me those back! Come here! Hey! 730 00:50:12,760 --> 00:50:14,959 Wormser, how many cameras do we have left? 731 00:50:14,960 --> 00:50:17,288 - Four. - Okay. 732 00:50:17,520 --> 00:50:19,449 (SCREAMING CONTINUES) 733 00:50:20,800 --> 00:50:22,759 Step aside, mama. I wanna see some of that muff. 734 00:50:22,760 --> 00:50:24,639 Hair pie. Hair pie! 735 00:50:24,640 --> 00:50:25,841 (GROWLING) 736 00:50:33,880 --> 00:50:36,839 That nerd saw me naked! Oh! Get out! 737 00:50:36,840 --> 00:50:39,168 Out! Out! Out! Get out! 738 00:50:39,840 --> 00:50:41,839 - Hiya, buddy. - Hi! 739 00:50:41,840 --> 00:50:44,399 - Isn't college great? - This is going to be a great year. 740 00:50:44,400 --> 00:50:45,726 (LAUGHING) 741 00:50:48,000 --> 00:50:49,850 (GIRLS SCREAMING) 742 00:50:55,800 --> 00:50:57,650 Get out of here! 743 00:50:59,080 --> 00:51:01,362 Hair pie! Hair pie! 744 00:51:03,120 --> 00:51:05,159 BETTY: Stan's gonna kill you! 745 00:51:05,160 --> 00:51:06,725 Get out! Jerks! 746 00:51:07,120 --> 00:51:09,679 (SCREAMS) Ooh! 747 00:51:09,680 --> 00:51:11,370 We love you when you're mad! 748 00:51:12,560 --> 00:51:14,285 (EXASPERATED SIGH) 749 00:51:14,400 --> 00:51:16,887 - Almost there, Wormser? - This should do it. 750 00:51:19,440 --> 00:51:20,519 Oh. 751 00:51:20,520 --> 00:51:21,721 - Ah. - Good. 752 00:51:23,480 --> 00:51:24,999 That looks good, Lamar. 753 00:51:25,000 --> 00:51:27,202 This is a stationary camera. 754 00:51:27,320 --> 00:51:29,279 - We've got Pi's. - WORMSER: Mmm. 755 00:51:29,280 --> 00:51:30,839 GILBERT: You got other angles, Lamar? 756 00:51:30,840 --> 00:51:33,486 - Go to their room. - BOOGER: Yeah, go in their room. 757 00:51:33,520 --> 00:51:36,371 - POINDEXTER: Yeah. Perfect. Good. - (POINTING) 758 00:51:36,880 --> 00:51:39,924 - GILBERT: Arnold, that's her. - Go to the right. 759 00:51:40,560 --> 00:51:42,888 Arnold, that's the girl we saw. 760 00:51:44,120 --> 00:51:46,519 - LEWIS: Go up. Go up. Go up. - LAMAR: Up? 761 00:51:46,520 --> 00:51:48,799 LEWIS: Wait a second. Hold it right there, Lamar. 762 00:51:48,800 --> 00:51:50,319 Don't move the camera. 763 00:51:50,320 --> 00:51:51,885 (ALL EXCLAIMING) 764 00:51:52,880 --> 00:51:54,081 Yeah! 765 00:51:55,440 --> 00:51:56,641 TAKASHI: Oh, no. 766 00:51:57,040 --> 00:51:58,890 I drink to that. 767 00:52:01,120 --> 00:52:03,687 BOOGER: Yes. I like that nightie. 768 00:52:04,439 --> 00:52:06,879 - TAKASHI: That's very good. - LEWIS: Can you go in that room? 769 00:52:06,880 --> 00:52:08,411 - Okay. - (BEEPING) 770 00:52:08,840 --> 00:52:10,405 - (GIGGLING) - (CHUCKLING) 771 00:52:11,960 --> 00:52:13,764 TAKASHI: Here she comes. 772 00:52:15,040 --> 00:52:17,399 God, take your towel off, please. 773 00:52:17,400 --> 00:52:18,879 Come on. Remove it. There's somethin' comin' up. 774 00:52:18,880 --> 00:52:22,527 Yes! Is it cold in there or what? 775 00:52:23,800 --> 00:52:25,001 (LAUGHS) 776 00:52:26,600 --> 00:52:28,131 GILBERT: Nature's thermometers. 777 00:52:28,440 --> 00:52:29,641 (LAUGHING) 778 00:52:31,080 --> 00:52:34,199 - LEWIS: Focus! Focus it, Lamar. - TAKASHI: Focus! 779 00:52:34,200 --> 00:52:36,448 LAMAR: Just kidding. 780 00:52:38,920 --> 00:52:42,090 This is bullshit. I want bush. Pan down. 781 00:52:42,280 --> 00:52:43,481 (WHIRRING) 782 00:52:43,960 --> 00:52:45,759 (WHISTLING, EXCLAIMING) 783 00:52:45,760 --> 00:52:48,361 We've got bush. We've got bush! 784 00:52:49,240 --> 00:52:50,441 Hair pie! 785 00:52:50,840 --> 00:52:52,041 (LAUGHING) 786 00:52:53,800 --> 00:52:55,001 (SCREAMS) 787 00:53:00,360 --> 00:53:01,721 (ROOSTER CROWS) 788 00:53:04,200 --> 00:53:05,401 (SNORING) 789 00:53:08,600 --> 00:53:10,882 LEWIS: I'm tired of watching 'em brush their teeth. 790 00:53:11,080 --> 00:53:13,886 See if Betty's up. Dooley, throw me a beer. 791 00:53:14,160 --> 00:53:15,361 Thanks. 792 00:53:17,080 --> 00:53:20,039 Oh, I getting tired of Betty. 793 00:53:20,040 --> 00:53:22,242 Are you kidding? Zoom in. 794 00:53:23,880 --> 00:53:26,039 I could never get tired of Betty. 795 00:53:26,040 --> 00:53:28,639 How could you ever get tired of that ass, Takashi? 796 00:53:28,640 --> 00:53:31,320 Oh, I see your point. 797 00:53:34,000 --> 00:53:36,199 Are you guys still watching the Pi's? 798 00:53:36,200 --> 00:53:38,846 - ALL: Yes. - Have you been up all night? 799 00:53:38,880 --> 00:53:40,399 ALL: Yes. 800 00:53:40,400 --> 00:53:44,650 - Wormser, haven't you had enough? - No. 801 00:53:45,360 --> 00:53:47,688 LEWIS: Well, I think we got even with the Pi's. 802 00:53:48,240 --> 00:53:51,922 Now we got a little score to settle with the Alpha Betas. 803 00:53:53,000 --> 00:53:54,201 (LAUGHS) 804 00:53:58,000 --> 00:53:59,599 Shit, Hank, What is that stuff? 805 00:53:59,600 --> 00:54:02,479 - Liquid heat. - It burns. 806 00:54:02,480 --> 00:54:06,571 You oughta feel it when I don't mix it with water. (CHUCKLES) 807 00:54:12,120 --> 00:54:13,526 Get them! 808 00:54:16,120 --> 00:54:17,845 Make pile here. 809 00:54:20,280 --> 00:54:21,970 Hurry. 810 00:54:24,600 --> 00:54:26,839 Okay. Here goes. 811 00:54:26,840 --> 00:54:27,959 (GROANS) 812 00:54:27,960 --> 00:54:29,679 BOOGER: Go for it. 813 00:54:29,680 --> 00:54:32,008 Okay, don't... Don't touch now. 814 00:54:32,440 --> 00:54:34,679 - Okay. Okay. - Here. Hit this one. 815 00:54:34,680 --> 00:54:36,962 Looks like salad. 816 00:54:38,920 --> 00:54:41,248 The key to each season is homecoming. 817 00:54:42,520 --> 00:54:45,803 You win that one, you got your alumni support. 818 00:54:46,480 --> 00:54:49,968 You got your alumni support, you got that jock dorm, 819 00:54:50,040 --> 00:54:53,483 you get the laundry money, you get the new cars. 820 00:54:53,920 --> 00:54:58,045 Now, this season started out fine. We won some big ball games! 821 00:54:59,040 --> 00:55:00,446 But we were lucky. 822 00:55:01,440 --> 00:55:03,079 We can't get soft. 823 00:55:03,080 --> 00:55:05,282 We can't sit back on our laurels. 824 00:55:05,560 --> 00:55:08,719 We win homecoming, we take league. 825 00:55:08,720 --> 00:55:11,839 We take league, we get a bowl bid. 826 00:55:11,840 --> 00:55:14,281 - It's as simple as that. - (ALL GROANING) 827 00:55:14,400 --> 00:55:17,922 But, gentlemen, you have got to want it. 828 00:55:18,680 --> 00:55:19,759 Do you want it? 829 00:55:19,760 --> 00:55:22,239 - ALL: Yeah! - I can't hear you! 830 00:55:22,240 --> 00:55:23,639 - ALL: Yeah! - (SHRIEKS) Yes! 831 00:55:23,640 --> 00:55:26,199 We can't let up! We gotta stay tough. 832 00:55:26,200 --> 00:55:27,279 (GROANING INTENSIFIES) 833 00:55:27,280 --> 00:55:29,399 You can do it! You can do it! 834 00:55:29,400 --> 00:55:31,602 - You can do it! - God! 835 00:55:32,080 --> 00:55:35,204 You gotta believe that you can do it! 836 00:55:35,320 --> 00:55:36,399 (SCREAMING) 837 00:55:36,400 --> 00:55:39,919 - You gotta let them know that you want it! - I want it! 838 00:55:39,920 --> 00:55:41,919 - Good! - (GROANS) 839 00:55:41,920 --> 00:55:44,441 - Shower up! - Oh, God. 840 00:55:47,600 --> 00:55:50,007 Shit, we forgot to practice. 841 00:55:51,760 --> 00:55:53,200 You put what? 842 00:55:53,440 --> 00:55:54,641 LEWIS: Liquid heat. 843 00:55:55,080 --> 00:55:58,124 - On their what? - In their jocks. 844 00:55:58,280 --> 00:56:01,439 - That's outrageous. - Are you angry, U.N.? 845 00:56:01,440 --> 00:56:04,962 (LAUGHS) No! I'm not angry. 846 00:56:05,960 --> 00:56:09,879 I'm glad to see you... You guys finally fought back. 847 00:56:09,880 --> 00:56:13,879 I think you'll make a fine addition to Tri Lambda, and I wanna welcome you aboard. 848 00:56:13,880 --> 00:56:16,359 - Congratulations. - All right! 849 00:56:16,360 --> 00:56:19,689 - You'll tell the guys? - I will! (LAUGHING) 850 00:56:20,520 --> 00:56:21,719 (CHUCKLES) 851 00:56:21,720 --> 00:56:23,843 Okay, everybody ready? 852 00:56:24,120 --> 00:56:27,847 Okay, I focus now. I set timer. 853 00:56:28,760 --> 00:56:30,799 Now say, "Hi, U.N." 854 00:56:30,800 --> 00:56:32,240 Hi, U.N.! 855 00:56:32,280 --> 00:56:33,766 (SHUTTER CLICKS) 856 00:56:36,640 --> 00:56:40,322 Well, I'd like to propose a toast to U.N. Jefferson, 857 00:56:41,040 --> 00:56:42,844 who, in his ultimate wisdom, 858 00:56:43,120 --> 00:56:45,561 chose to accept us 859 00:56:45,640 --> 00:56:49,003 into our new fraternity, Lambda Lambda Lambda. 860 00:56:49,040 --> 00:56:52,210 ALL: Lambda Lambda Lambda! 861 00:57:01,000 --> 00:57:03,319 Before we take this matter to a vote, 862 00:57:03,320 --> 00:57:07,047 I would like it clearly stated in the record, Miss Childs, 863 00:57:07,680 --> 00:57:12,442 that the evidence is overwhelmingly against the Alpha Betas 864 00:57:12,680 --> 00:57:15,406 and I urge that they be found guilty. 865 00:57:15,760 --> 00:57:17,325 Point of order. 866 00:57:18,880 --> 00:57:22,926 Dean Ulich, I am an Alpha Beta, 867 00:57:22,960 --> 00:57:25,639 and I know that no member of my fraternity 868 00:57:25,640 --> 00:57:29,519 could have perpetrated such a callous, heinous act 869 00:57:29,520 --> 00:57:32,519 against the nerds or the Tri-Lambs. 870 00:57:32,520 --> 00:57:37,248 Therefore, I feel a vote at this time would be, shall we say, premature. 871 00:57:37,720 --> 00:57:39,763 - Premature? - Yes. 872 00:57:39,880 --> 00:57:43,639 You see, instead, I am going to organize 873 00:57:43,640 --> 00:57:46,959 a special, blue-ribbon fact-finding commission 874 00:57:46,960 --> 00:57:51,085 made up of myself and, uh, Miss Betty Childs 875 00:57:51,880 --> 00:57:54,479 and we will get to the bottom of this dastardly deed. 876 00:57:54,480 --> 00:57:58,401 - You can't get away with this. - Oh, no, I'm afraid I can. 877 00:57:58,760 --> 00:58:03,761 You see, only the President of the Greek Council can call a vote. 878 00:58:03,920 --> 00:58:07,124 - That's completely unfair! - This is bullshit! 879 00:58:07,200 --> 00:58:09,129 Meeting adjourned. 880 00:58:10,400 --> 00:58:11,601 (BURKE LAUGHS) 881 00:58:15,560 --> 00:58:19,839 Guys, we are never gonna get a fair shake as long as Stan Gable is president. 882 00:58:19,840 --> 00:58:23,519 But the only way to become president is to win the homecoming carnival. 883 00:58:23,520 --> 00:58:24,759 That's right, Arnold. 884 00:58:24,760 --> 00:58:27,327 - And that's exactly what we're gonna do. - Yeah! 885 00:58:27,440 --> 00:58:30,166 (PLAYING FAN FARE) 886 00:58:31,920 --> 00:58:33,759 I take great pleasure 887 00:58:33,760 --> 00:58:38,648 in officially opening this year's homecoming carnival! 888 00:58:39,000 --> 00:58:40,645 (FANFARE CONTINUES) 889 00:58:46,760 --> 00:58:51,439 ULICH: The overall winner will be determined by total points 890 00:58:51,440 --> 00:58:55,039 from, number one, field events, 891 00:58:55,040 --> 00:58:58,679 number two, the charity fund-raising booth 892 00:58:58,680 --> 00:59:02,327 and number three, the musical show and skit competition. 893 00:59:03,720 --> 00:59:07,003 And now, let the games begin! 894 00:59:07,880 --> 00:59:09,684 (FANFARE CONTINUES) 895 00:59:11,120 --> 00:59:12,685 (CHEERING) 896 00:59:15,120 --> 00:59:16,321 (FEEDBACK) 897 00:59:16,800 --> 00:59:21,289 Okay, the object of the race is to complete 20 laps around the track, 898 00:59:21,640 --> 00:59:24,759 while stopping every lap for a mandatory pit stop 899 00:59:24,760 --> 00:59:27,804 at which time the driver will chug a beer. 900 00:59:29,520 --> 00:59:31,199 You don't have a fucking chance, nerd. 901 00:59:31,200 --> 00:59:35,166 - Thank you. Good luck to you, too, Burke. - Fuck off. 902 00:59:35,240 --> 00:59:37,886 Gentlemen, start your engines. 903 00:59:38,240 --> 00:59:39,441 (GUNSHOT) 904 00:59:39,600 --> 00:59:41,370 (CHEERING, YELLING) 905 00:59:56,000 --> 00:59:57,531 - Come on! - (GRUNTS) 906 00:59:58,240 --> 01:00:02,843 This is trichloromethaline. It counters all effects of alcohol in your system. 907 01:00:04,000 --> 01:00:06,879 - Drink the whole beer. - Go, go, go! Come on, Danny! 908 01:00:06,880 --> 01:00:09,559 - Come on, buddy! Kick his ass! - Go, go, go, go! 909 01:00:09,560 --> 01:00:12,411 - Go, go, go, go! - Go, go, go, go! 910 01:00:23,240 --> 01:00:25,159 - Okay, okay, come on! - You feeling okay? 911 01:00:25,160 --> 01:00:28,091 - Oh, fucking great! - Go, go, go! 912 01:00:33,400 --> 01:00:35,443 Come on, baby! Yeah! 913 01:00:40,040 --> 01:00:42,559 - Come on, guy! - Only one more lap to go. 914 01:00:42,560 --> 01:00:44,250 Just you and the Alpha Betas. 915 01:00:44,320 --> 01:00:48,119 You let that nerd beat you, and you're nothing! Understand? 916 01:00:48,120 --> 01:00:51,479 - He no stand no chance now! - Go, Takashi! 917 01:00:51,480 --> 01:00:55,366 - Come on! Let's go, Burke! Here we go! - Oh, no! 918 01:00:56,160 --> 01:00:58,840 All right! Come on, Takashi! Go! 919 01:00:59,000 --> 01:01:01,079 Aw, man, he's wasted! 920 01:01:01,080 --> 01:01:03,487 (BICYCLE BUILT FOR TWO PLAYING) 921 01:01:07,760 --> 01:01:11,282 Come on, Burke! You're an Alpha Beta! 922 01:01:15,920 --> 01:01:17,079 Fuck! 923 01:01:17,080 --> 01:01:20,841 - Shit! - I won! I won! 924 01:01:26,600 --> 01:01:30,805 Times are changin', Betty. These nerds are a threat to our way of life. 925 01:01:30,920 --> 01:01:34,169 If they win homecoming, they're gonna take over the Greek Council. 926 01:01:34,200 --> 01:01:37,722 And we'll be up to our necks in nerd shit. 927 01:01:40,120 --> 01:01:43,085 ULICH: Our next competition will be the Trojan Horse. 928 01:01:47,000 --> 01:01:48,929 - (CHEERING) - (GROANING) 929 01:01:49,240 --> 01:01:52,079 Come on! Come on! Get off! 930 01:01:52,080 --> 01:01:54,408 Get off! 931 01:01:54,800 --> 01:01:55,919 - (GROANS) - Yeah! 932 01:01:55,920 --> 01:01:58,282 (MOUTHING) What is Alpha Beta doing? 933 01:01:58,480 --> 01:01:59,681 (LAUGHING) 934 01:02:11,560 --> 01:02:13,524 - All right! - (CHEERING) 935 01:02:26,120 --> 01:02:27,321 (CHEERING) 936 01:02:59,280 --> 01:03:02,479 (CHANTING) Ogre! Ogre! Ogre! Ogre! 937 01:03:02,480 --> 01:03:05,439 - Ogre! Ogre! Ogre! Ogre! - (GROANING) 938 01:03:05,440 --> 01:03:09,919 Ogre! Ogre! Ogre! Ogre! Ogre! Ogre! 939 01:03:09,920 --> 01:03:12,839 Ogre! Ogre! Ogre! Ogre! 940 01:03:12,840 --> 01:03:17,807 Ogre! Ogre! Ogre! Ogre! Ogre! Ogre! 941 01:03:20,960 --> 01:03:22,161 (GROANS) 942 01:03:22,760 --> 01:03:23,961 (CHEERING) 943 01:03:28,480 --> 01:03:29,681 (COUGHING) 944 01:03:29,880 --> 01:03:32,399 - Ooh! Aah! Alpha Beta! - On your mark! Set! 945 01:03:32,400 --> 01:03:35,604 - Ooh! Aah! Alpha Beta! - (WHISTLE BLOWS) 946 01:03:39,120 --> 01:03:40,321 (CHEERING) 947 01:03:43,880 --> 01:03:45,081 (CHUCKLING) 948 01:03:45,800 --> 01:03:48,639 Ooh! Aah! Alpha Beta! 949 01:03:48,640 --> 01:03:51,479 - Ooh! Aah! Alpha Beta! - COACH: On your mark! 950 01:03:51,480 --> 01:03:54,445 - Set! (BLOWS WHISTLE) - Ooh! Aah! Alpha Beta! 951 01:03:54,840 --> 01:03:56,804 (CHEERLEADERS SCREAMING) 952 01:03:58,120 --> 01:04:00,163 You win! 953 01:04:01,160 --> 01:04:02,646 (CHEERING, APPLAUSE) 954 01:04:06,080 --> 01:04:07,281 (CHUCKLING) 955 01:04:14,880 --> 01:04:17,479 Frankly, I'm not too wild about this next event, 956 01:04:17,480 --> 01:04:21,810 but it has become a tradition here at Adams, the belching contest. 957 01:04:22,120 --> 01:04:23,321 (CHEERING) 958 01:04:23,760 --> 01:04:27,328 Our first of two finalists, Frederick W. Polowosky. 959 01:04:28,440 --> 01:04:29,641 (WHISPERING) 960 01:04:30,080 --> 01:04:32,487 - "Ogre, you asshole." - (CROWD MURMURING) 961 01:04:33,040 --> 01:04:34,287 Ogre. 962 01:04:39,800 --> 01:04:41,240 (LOUD BURP) 963 01:04:42,960 --> 01:04:44,525 (CHEERING, APPLAUSE) 964 01:04:48,640 --> 01:04:50,604 (GASPING, MURMURING) 965 01:04:56,160 --> 01:05:00,126 And from the Lambda-Mu team, Dudley Dawson. 966 01:05:00,760 --> 01:05:03,042 - Booger. - Booger. 967 01:05:10,480 --> 01:05:12,045 (VERY LOUD BURP) 968 01:05:17,280 --> 01:05:18,845 (LOUD CHEERING) 969 01:05:28,120 --> 01:05:32,759 Our next event is one that goes all the way back to the Peloponnesian War, 970 01:05:32,760 --> 01:05:34,007 the javelin throw. 971 01:05:49,880 --> 01:05:51,081 (YELLS) 972 01:06:05,120 --> 01:06:06,401 Yeah! 973 01:06:11,200 --> 01:06:14,609 - All right, baby! - What'd you expect? 974 01:06:21,920 --> 01:06:24,771 - GILBERT: Wait till you see Lamar's throw. - JUDY: How come? 975 01:06:24,880 --> 01:06:26,719 Wormser's a master at aerodynamics 976 01:06:26,720 --> 01:06:31,289 and he designed the javelin to go along with Lamar's limp-wristed throwing style. 977 01:07:00,520 --> 01:07:02,919 - Wormser! It worked! - (CHEERING, APPLAUSE) 978 01:07:02,920 --> 01:07:05,487 I can't believe it! Did you see that? 979 01:07:12,480 --> 01:07:15,479 I love you all! I love you all! Thank you! 980 01:07:15,480 --> 01:07:18,047 Thank you! 981 01:07:21,480 --> 01:07:23,842 ULICH: (ON P.A.) The Alpha Beta-Pi team leads. 982 01:07:24,080 --> 01:07:26,719 The Lambda-Mus are a surprising second. 983 01:07:26,720 --> 01:07:30,163 Now let's see what happens at the charity fund-raising booths. 984 01:07:30,440 --> 01:07:33,479 Eat a pie for charity! Come on! Let's go! 985 01:07:33,480 --> 01:07:36,809 Buy a pie for charity! Thank you. 986 01:07:40,480 --> 01:07:42,091 Take a break, Chip. 987 01:07:45,880 --> 01:07:48,003 Hi. 988 01:07:49,560 --> 01:07:52,286 - Hi, Betty. - A nerd. 989 01:07:53,560 --> 01:07:56,366 - I'm not kissing a nerd. - You have to. 990 01:07:57,000 --> 01:07:58,725 I paid my money. 991 01:07:58,840 --> 01:08:01,441 (CHUCKLES) It's time for my break. 992 01:08:03,480 --> 01:08:05,284 Kiss this, nerd. 993 01:08:06,440 --> 01:08:08,563 - BETTY: Stan! - Yeah? 994 01:08:11,000 --> 01:08:14,359 I wanna do it. All this kissing's made me horny. 995 01:08:14,360 --> 01:08:17,404 God, Betty, you're like a goat. 996 01:08:17,720 --> 01:08:18,921 (HUFFS) 997 01:08:21,600 --> 01:08:22,847 Next. 998 01:08:52,480 --> 01:08:53,761 Stan! 999 01:08:57,560 --> 01:08:59,091 You changed your mind. 1000 01:09:02,280 --> 01:09:04,767 I'm glad. Come on. 1001 01:09:21,200 --> 01:09:22,765 Hey, you. 1002 01:09:25,680 --> 01:09:28,360 You wanna do it on the moon? 1003 01:09:47,480 --> 01:09:49,682 Take off your mask. 1004 01:09:50,200 --> 01:09:51,640 Oh, Stan. 1005 01:09:52,600 --> 01:09:55,167 You're so kinky. 1006 01:09:59,840 --> 01:10:02,599 BOOGER: Eat a pie for charity. Step right up. 1007 01:10:02,600 --> 01:10:04,439 Come on. Step up. 1008 01:10:04,440 --> 01:10:09,521 - Eat a pie for charity. Thank you very much. - Eat a pie for charity! 1009 01:10:09,800 --> 01:10:11,159 Gable, how we doin'? 1010 01:10:11,160 --> 01:10:16,759 - Great, 1,258 bucks. Better than last year. - The nerds are over 2,000. 1011 01:10:16,760 --> 01:10:18,799 - Yep. - For selling pies? 1012 01:10:18,800 --> 01:10:22,482 They've got a line around the corner. Guys are buying two, three pies apiece. 1013 01:10:22,600 --> 01:10:26,168 There's something fishy about these pies. Let's go check it out. 1014 01:10:27,480 --> 01:10:29,250 TAKASHI: Okay, hold on for a second. 1015 01:10:30,040 --> 01:10:32,925 - Thank you. - BOOGER: Pies for charity. 1016 01:10:33,560 --> 01:10:35,524 - Pies for charity. - GABLE: This can't be! 1017 01:10:35,600 --> 01:10:39,282 Ogre, go get a pie. Find out what the hell's going on here. 1018 01:10:42,520 --> 01:10:45,530 Thanks, wimp. Get yourself one. 1019 01:10:48,120 --> 01:10:50,079 - Well, how is it? - Good. 1020 01:10:50,080 --> 01:10:52,203 - Is it good, or is it great? - It's good. 1021 01:10:52,718 --> 01:10:55,359 Just good? Then what the hell are they selling so many of them for? 1022 01:10:55,360 --> 01:10:58,086 Here's why. Uh-oh. 1023 01:11:04,000 --> 01:11:05,486 That's my Pi. 1024 01:11:14,200 --> 01:11:16,050 Oh, Stan. 1025 01:11:16,840 --> 01:11:18,405 That was wonderful. 1026 01:11:19,320 --> 01:11:22,091 You did things to me you've never done before. 1027 01:11:22,680 --> 01:11:23,881 (GASPS) 1028 01:11:24,200 --> 01:11:25,970 You're that nerd! 1029 01:11:26,040 --> 01:11:27,366 Yeah. 1030 01:11:28,560 --> 01:11:30,762 God, you were wonderful. 1031 01:11:30,880 --> 01:11:32,127 Thanks. 1032 01:11:33,880 --> 01:11:36,719 (GIGGLES) Are all nerds as good as you? 1033 01:11:36,720 --> 01:11:39,959 - Yes. - How come? 1034 01:11:39,960 --> 01:11:43,050 'Cause all jocks think about is sports. 1035 01:11:43,560 --> 01:11:46,081 All we ever think about is sex. 1036 01:11:47,880 --> 01:11:50,162 - What's your name? - Lewis. 1037 01:11:50,800 --> 01:11:52,206 Lewis, 1038 01:11:53,560 --> 01:11:57,048 would you meet me after the pep rally tonight? 1039 01:11:57,160 --> 01:11:58,441 Sure. 1040 01:12:03,400 --> 01:12:05,079 ULICH: It's all tied up, 1041 01:12:05,080 --> 01:12:09,079 which means the musical show and skit competition will decide the winner. 1042 01:12:09,080 --> 01:12:12,039 So, let the music begin! 1043 01:12:12,040 --> 01:12:16,319 (SINGING) Row, row, row your boat gently down the stream. 1044 01:12:16,320 --> 01:12:18,921 Merrily, merrily Merrily, merrily. 1045 01:12:19,760 --> 01:12:22,079 Life is but a dream 1046 01:12:22,080 --> 01:12:24,442 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING, APPLAUDING) 1047 01:12:26,799 --> 01:12:28,919 What'd the Pink Panther say when he stepped on an ant? 1048 01:12:28,920 --> 01:12:31,599 - What did the Pink Panther say? - Dead ant. Dead ant. 1049 01:12:31,600 --> 01:12:34,531 - Dead-ant, dead-ant dead-ant. - (BOOING) 1050 01:12:34,919 --> 01:12:36,919 What is the dirtiest thing ever said on television? 1051 01:12:36,920 --> 01:12:38,999 The dirtiest thing ever said on television. I don't know. 1052 01:12:39,000 --> 01:12:42,010 "Ward, I think you were a little hard on the Beaver last night." 1053 01:12:43,960 --> 01:12:45,161 (GROANING) 1054 01:12:45,840 --> 01:12:49,399 (SINGING) Gable, Gable, he's our man! If he can't do it, Burke can! 1055 01:12:49,400 --> 01:12:52,959 Burke, Burke, he's our man! If he can't do it, Ogre can! 1056 01:12:52,960 --> 01:12:56,279 - Give me an "A"! - Give me a "D"! 1057 01:12:56,280 --> 01:12:59,959 - Give me an "A"! - Give me an "M"! 1058 01:12:59,960 --> 01:13:02,799 - Give me an "S"! - What's it spell? 1059 01:13:02,800 --> 01:13:05,526 Adams! 1060 01:13:06,000 --> 01:13:07,201 (CHEERING) 1061 01:13:07,320 --> 01:13:08,851 (GIRLS SINGING) 1062 01:13:34,160 --> 01:13:35,646 (LOUD CHEERING) 1063 01:13:36,720 --> 01:13:37,921 (WHISTLING) 1064 01:13:40,800 --> 01:13:42,161 - Whoa! - (GASPING) 1065 01:13:43,200 --> 01:13:46,609 Look at that! Look at that! 1066 01:13:53,240 --> 01:13:55,488 (ELECTRONIC ROCK MUSIC PLAYING) 1067 01:14:21,440 --> 01:14:22,641 (CHEERING) 1068 01:15:34,000 --> 01:15:36,487 Break! 1069 01:16:06,880 --> 01:16:08,923 (CHEERING WILDLY) 1070 01:16:29,320 --> 01:16:31,679 I'd like to present the trophy 1071 01:16:31,680 --> 01:16:33,484 to this year's champions... 1072 01:16:33,680 --> 01:16:36,963 Lambda Lambda Lambda and Omega Mu! 1073 01:16:42,360 --> 01:16:44,719 They will be able to select the president 1074 01:16:44,720 --> 01:16:46,888 of next year's Greek Council. 1075 01:16:48,320 --> 01:16:49,567 No! 1076 01:16:51,080 --> 01:16:53,839 I'd like to announce that we've made our selection already. 1077 01:16:53,840 --> 01:16:55,451 It's Gilbert Lowe! 1078 01:17:00,400 --> 01:17:03,039 This sucks. I gotta get rid of some of this anger. 1079 01:17:03,040 --> 01:17:06,959 - Come on, Betty. Let's go pump some iron. - No, Stan. I don't think so. 1080 01:17:06,960 --> 01:17:09,561 What do you mean? Let's go. Why not? 1081 01:17:10,760 --> 01:17:12,405 I've got a date with a Tri-Lamb. 1082 01:17:13,080 --> 01:17:14,930 (LAUGHS) A Tri-Lamb. 1083 01:17:15,480 --> 01:17:16,761 Here's your pin. 1084 01:17:18,480 --> 01:17:19,886 Take it. 1085 01:17:20,640 --> 01:17:23,650 Wait. Betty. Come on. 1086 01:17:25,520 --> 01:17:28,451 God! I'm in love with a nerd! (CHUCKLING) 1087 01:17:29,880 --> 01:17:32,048 - Gable. - Yeah, Coach? 1088 01:17:33,120 --> 01:17:38,201 I wanna see you and the other girls in the locker room now! 1089 01:17:39,160 --> 01:17:40,441 Yes, sir. 1090 01:17:45,120 --> 01:17:46,890 (COACH CLEARS THROAT) 1091 01:17:47,920 --> 01:17:51,090 When you were a baby in your crib, 1092 01:17:51,760 --> 01:17:54,008 your father looked down at you, 1093 01:17:54,080 --> 01:17:55,441 he had but one hope, 1094 01:17:56,640 --> 01:17:59,366 someday my son will grow to be a man. 1095 01:18:01,440 --> 01:18:03,449 Well, look at you now. 1096 01:18:05,280 --> 01:18:09,041 You just got your asses whipped 1097 01:18:09,120 --> 01:18:11,800 by a bunch of goddamn nerds. 1098 01:18:14,120 --> 01:18:15,446 Nerds! 1099 01:18:18,400 --> 01:18:20,728 If I was you, I'd do somethin' about it. 1100 01:18:23,280 --> 01:18:26,211 I would get up and redeem myself 1101 01:18:27,440 --> 01:18:32,009 in the eyes of my father, my maker and my coach! 1102 01:18:32,040 --> 01:18:34,679 - Well, let's get those nerds! - Nerds! 1103 01:18:34,680 --> 01:18:37,959 - Nerds! - What are we waitin' for? 1104 01:18:37,960 --> 01:18:39,161 (ALL YELLING) 1105 01:18:46,640 --> 01:18:49,491 IN UNISON: We're Lambda Lambda Lambda and. 1106 01:18:49,560 --> 01:18:51,439 - Omega Mu! - (LEWIS LAUGHING) 1107 01:18:51,440 --> 01:18:54,120 (CHANTING) Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! 1108 01:18:54,400 --> 01:18:55,601 (ALL YELLING) 1109 01:19:02,200 --> 01:19:05,131 - Come on! Come on! - (GLASS SHATTERING) 1110 01:19:34,520 --> 01:19:35,767 I'm a nerd. 1111 01:19:38,040 --> 01:19:39,526 Welcome to the real world. 1112 01:19:40,680 --> 01:19:42,803 I never really wanted to believe that. 1113 01:19:43,600 --> 01:19:46,565 - It's okay. - It's not okay. 1114 01:19:46,680 --> 01:19:51,124 We're nothing. We let them destroy our house. 1115 01:19:51,960 --> 01:19:54,239 Lewis, we're gonna control the Greek Council next year. 1116 01:19:54,240 --> 01:19:55,441 Big deal! 1117 01:19:56,880 --> 01:19:58,844 You'll be dead by then, Gilbert. 1118 01:20:00,000 --> 01:20:03,727 Nobody cares. Don't you understand that? The university doesn't care. 1119 01:20:04,400 --> 01:20:06,568 There's nothing we can do about it. 1120 01:20:07,080 --> 01:20:08,759 I think we got something good going, 1121 01:20:08,760 --> 01:20:10,919 and I'm not gonna let 'em take it away from us. 1122 01:20:10,920 --> 01:20:12,839 Gilbert, don't be a fool. 1123 01:20:12,840 --> 01:20:14,883 You'll just get yourself hurt again. 1124 01:20:15,160 --> 01:20:17,931 - Big deal. - Gilbert. 1125 01:20:23,480 --> 01:20:26,331 - (CHEERING) - (MARCHING BAND PLAYING) 1126 01:20:38,880 --> 01:20:41,759 I'd like to introduce to you the men that are gonna bring you 1127 01:20:41,760 --> 01:20:44,804 a homecoming victory against State tomorrow. 1128 01:20:45,280 --> 01:20:48,563 At defensive back, number 38, Kevin O'Leary. 1129 01:20:50,000 --> 01:20:53,124 Offensive guard, number 64, Rich Valeroy. 1130 01:20:55,040 --> 01:20:57,971 At center, number 53, Harry Reagan! 1131 01:21:00,440 --> 01:21:01,959 Look who's comin'. 1132 01:21:01,960 --> 01:21:04,159 - Hey! Where you goin', nerd? - Just leave me alone. 1133 01:21:04,160 --> 01:21:06,879 You guys went way too far this time, and you're not getting away with it. 1134 01:21:06,880 --> 01:21:08,719 - Oh, is that right? - Yeah. 1135 01:21:08,720 --> 01:21:11,519 Well, let's see if shit floats. What do you think of that idea? 1136 01:21:11,520 --> 01:21:15,042 Put me down. Goddamn... Put me down! 1137 01:21:15,080 --> 01:21:16,520 Bombs away! 1138 01:21:18,120 --> 01:21:20,846 And now, our tri-captains. 1139 01:21:21,400 --> 01:21:23,479 Leading the conference in reception, 1140 01:21:23,480 --> 01:21:26,843 at wide receiver, number 84, Danny Burke! 1141 01:21:26,960 --> 01:21:31,449 Our defensive captain, number 79, Fred Polowosky! 1142 01:21:31,640 --> 01:21:32,959 - Ogre! - The Ogre! 1143 01:21:32,960 --> 01:21:34,079 (ROARS) 1144 01:21:34,080 --> 01:21:36,851 Now, our two-time all-American quarterback, 1145 01:21:36,920 --> 01:21:38,999 number 10, Stan Gable! 1146 01:21:39,000 --> 01:21:40,326 Yeah! 1147 01:21:44,320 --> 01:21:47,519 - Hold it, son! Hold it! Hold it! - Come on! 1148 01:21:47,520 --> 01:21:50,399 Leave him alone. Coach, I said leave him alone. 1149 01:21:50,400 --> 01:21:52,199 - What did you say? - You heard me. 1150 01:21:52,200 --> 01:21:55,199 - I'll break his goddamn neck! - You will do nothing of the sort. 1151 01:21:55,200 --> 01:21:56,970 Don't you touch that boy. 1152 01:21:57,840 --> 01:21:59,041 (GRUNTING) 1153 01:22:01,160 --> 01:22:02,361 Says who? 1154 01:22:04,480 --> 01:22:05,806 Says me, 1155 01:22:07,320 --> 01:22:08,601 you asshole. 1156 01:22:09,480 --> 01:22:10,727 Hold it, Coach! 1157 01:22:11,840 --> 01:22:13,804 You just hold it right there. 1158 01:22:49,400 --> 01:22:50,647 Okay, kid. 1159 01:22:52,960 --> 01:22:54,207 Say what you got to say. 1160 01:22:55,680 --> 01:22:56,927 Thanks. 1161 01:23:03,560 --> 01:23:05,399 Uh... (PANTING) 1162 01:23:05,400 --> 01:23:09,889 I just wanted to... To say that... That I'm a nerd. 1163 01:23:10,640 --> 01:23:14,287 And I'm here tonight to stand up for the rights of other nerds. 1164 01:23:15,120 --> 01:23:16,321 I mean, uh, 1165 01:23:16,520 --> 01:23:22,409 all our lives we've been laughed at and made to feel inferior. 1166 01:23:22,600 --> 01:23:23,847 And tonight, 1167 01:23:25,240 --> 01:23:28,649 those bastards, they trashed our house. 1168 01:23:29,600 --> 01:23:32,451 Why? Because we're smart? 1169 01:23:33,920 --> 01:23:35,849 'Cause we look different? 1170 01:23:36,920 --> 01:23:38,724 Well, we're not. 1171 01:23:41,160 --> 01:23:45,729 I'm a nerd, and, uh, I'm pretty proud of it. 1172 01:23:51,800 --> 01:23:53,604 - Hi, Gilbert. - Hi. 1173 01:23:54,480 --> 01:23:55,920 I'm a nerd, too. 1174 01:23:57,800 --> 01:23:59,923 I just found that out tonight. 1175 01:24:00,600 --> 01:24:03,280 We have news for the beautiful people. 1176 01:24:03,400 --> 01:24:06,080 There's a lot more of us than there are of you. 1177 01:24:07,720 --> 01:24:09,922 I know there's alumni here tonight. 1178 01:24:10,120 --> 01:24:14,644 When you went to Adams you might have been called a spaz 1179 01:24:15,480 --> 01:24:18,684 or a dork or a geek. 1180 01:24:19,160 --> 01:24:22,011 Any of you that have ever felt 1181 01:24:22,200 --> 01:24:26,849 stepped on, left out, picked on, put down, 1182 01:24:27,320 --> 01:24:31,002 whether you think you're a nerd or not, just come down and join us. 1183 01:24:31,280 --> 01:24:32,561 Come on. 1184 01:24:35,160 --> 01:24:36,850 (ROCK SONG PLAYING) 1185 01:24:39,040 --> 01:24:40,799 - Hi, Betty. - Hi. 1186 01:24:40,800 --> 01:24:44,209 Just join us, 'cause... Hi. 1187 01:24:46,080 --> 01:24:50,080 No one's gonna be free until nerd persecution ends. 1188 01:24:51,920 --> 01:24:53,121 (SIGHS) 1189 01:24:56,040 --> 01:24:57,287 Hi, guys. 1190 01:25:21,560 --> 01:25:24,959 You know, Coach. I think I'm gonna let these boys 1191 01:25:24,960 --> 01:25:26,719 live over at the Alpha Beta house 1192 01:25:26,720 --> 01:25:29,759 while you and your boys rebuild theirs. 1193 01:25:29,760 --> 01:25:33,487 - And where the hell are we gonna live? - Yeah. What about us, huh? 1194 01:25:34,040 --> 01:25:36,686 You're jocks. Go live in the gym. 1195 01:25:37,680 --> 01:25:40,724 (CHANTING) Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! 1196 01:25:40,800 --> 01:25:44,239 Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! 1197 01:25:44,240 --> 01:25:52,609 Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! 1198 01:25:53,000 --> 01:25:54,361 (ALL CHEERING) 1199 01:26:10,240 --> 01:26:11,441 (INAUDIBLE) 1200 01:26:22,080 --> 01:26:23,281 (INAUDIBLE) 1201 01:26:39,960 --> 01:26:41,571 (INAUDIBLE) 1202 01:26:43,400 --> 01:26:44,965 (INAUDIBLE) 1203 01:26:47,440 --> 01:26:48,641 (INAUDIBLE) 1204 01:27:12,160 --> 01:27:13,361 (INAUDIBLE) 1205 01:27:17,360 --> 01:27:18,561 (INAUDIBLE) 1206 01:27:18,661 --> 01:27:23,661 http://subscene.com/u/659433 Improved by: @Ivandrofly89669