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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,035 --> 00:00:04,872 (reel casts) 2 00:00:04,972 --> 00:00:07,841 I have a good feeling about this. 3 00:00:07,941 --> 00:00:10,411 I think fly fishing may have what it takes 4 00:00:10,511 --> 00:00:12,280 to be our new couples' activity. 5 00:00:12,380 --> 00:00:14,748 Jury's still out on the fishing, but I will say, it was 6 00:00:14,848 --> 00:00:17,451 pretty awesome hitting that squirrel on the drive up here. 7 00:00:17,551 --> 00:00:20,288 (reel casts) 8 00:00:20,388 --> 00:00:24,192 Ooh! I think I got one! 9 00:00:24,292 --> 00:00:25,793 STAN: Beginner's luck. 10 00:00:25,893 --> 00:00:27,195 (straining) 11 00:00:31,031 --> 00:00:32,466 (fish grunting) 12 00:00:32,566 --> 00:00:34,768 Beat it! Your kind isn't wanted here! 13 00:00:37,371 --> 00:00:40,241 FRANCINE: Don't worry, Stan. You'll get one. 14 00:00:40,341 --> 00:00:41,775 Ooh, ooh! I got one, too! 15 00:00:41,875 --> 00:00:42,943 -(reel cranking) -(grunting) 16 00:00:43,043 --> 00:00:45,446 Oh, it's really fighting me, Francine. 17 00:00:45,546 --> 00:00:47,648 Did it hurt your balls when you reeled yours in? 18 00:00:47,748 --> 00:00:49,883 Stan, I think it's just stuck on your -- 19 00:00:49,983 --> 00:00:52,286 -(fabric rips) -Oh, it got away! 20 00:00:52,386 --> 00:00:54,755 But, oh-ho-ho! It was a big one! 21 00:00:54,855 --> 00:00:56,990 42 waist. Same size as me. 22 00:00:57,091 --> 00:00:58,726 I'm gonna ask him where he buys his pants. 23 00:00:58,826 --> 00:01:00,628 (inhales deeply) 24 00:01:00,728 --> 00:01:02,330 (reel casts) 25 00:01:03,997 --> 00:01:07,000 It was quiet down there. Really gave me time to think. 26 00:01:07,101 --> 00:01:08,469 I realize now... 27 00:01:08,569 --> 00:01:12,005 it was my underwear. 28 00:01:12,106 --> 00:01:14,508 (patriotic music plays) 29 00:01:14,608 --> 00:01:17,178 * Good morning, U.S.A. * 30 00:01:17,278 --> 00:01:21,014 * I got a feelin' that it's gonna be a wonderful day * 31 00:01:21,115 --> 00:01:24,252 * The sun in the sky has a smile on his face * 32 00:01:24,352 --> 00:01:28,522 * And he's shinin' a salute to the American race * 33 00:01:30,424 --> 00:01:33,661 * Oh, boy, it's swell to say * 34 00:01:33,761 --> 00:01:35,963 -* Good -- * -* Good morning, U.S.A. * 35 00:01:36,063 --> 00:01:37,298 Aah! 36 00:01:38,599 --> 00:01:41,969 * Good morning, U.S.A. * 37 00:01:42,069 --> 00:01:44,472 ** 38 00:01:44,572 --> 00:01:47,341 Mm-mmm! This trout's delicious! 39 00:01:47,441 --> 00:01:48,709 So good! 40 00:01:48,809 --> 00:01:50,478 I like to take a big bite of fish... 41 00:01:50,578 --> 00:01:51,945 and then a big sip of milk... 42 00:01:52,045 --> 00:01:54,948 and then swish it all together in my mouth like this. 43 00:01:55,048 --> 00:01:57,385 (swishing) 44 00:01:57,485 --> 00:02:01,155 Ahh! It's like trouted milk balls. 45 00:02:01,255 --> 00:02:03,491 So it seems like fly fishing was a success? 46 00:02:03,591 --> 00:02:05,293 It was wonderful. 47 00:02:05,393 --> 00:02:08,629 So beautiful and peaceful out there. 48 00:02:08,729 --> 00:02:11,199 Yes, but we're obviously never doing it again. 49 00:02:11,299 --> 00:02:13,401 That was an audition for a couples' activity, 50 00:02:13,501 --> 00:02:14,535 and it failed. 51 00:02:14,635 --> 00:02:17,205 The couple tried it, the couple didn't like it, 52 00:02:17,305 --> 00:02:19,207 and now the couple will... 53 00:02:19,307 --> 00:02:21,709 * Put it on the boarrrd * 54 00:02:21,809 --> 00:02:24,345 This isn't a couples' rejection board! 55 00:02:24,445 --> 00:02:27,248 It's just a list of things we did that you didn't like. 56 00:02:27,348 --> 00:02:28,816 I'm not changing the sign, Francine. 57 00:02:28,916 --> 00:02:32,019 We only tried all these things once! 58 00:02:32,119 --> 00:02:34,255 Can't we give fly fishing another chance? 59 00:02:34,355 --> 00:02:35,889 No. W-Why can't we give 60 00:02:35,989 --> 00:02:38,058 Couples' Loan Sharking another chance? 61 00:02:38,158 --> 00:02:40,361 Because the mob came after us 62 00:02:40,461 --> 00:02:42,663 for stepping on their turf, remember?! 63 00:02:42,763 --> 00:02:44,232 They broke your wrist! 64 00:02:44,332 --> 00:02:46,267 Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, they were right to do that. 65 00:02:46,367 --> 00:02:47,535 I was not getting the picture. 66 00:02:47,635 --> 00:02:51,239 Please, Stan. I really loved fly fishing. 67 00:02:51,339 --> 00:02:55,776 (sighs) You know I can't say no to those beautiful black pupils. 68 00:02:55,876 --> 00:02:57,711 Let's give it another shot. 69 00:02:57,811 --> 00:03:00,414 Hey. "Steve's dance recitals"? 70 00:03:00,514 --> 00:03:02,049 I thought you stopped coming because you didn't want 71 00:03:02,149 --> 00:03:03,717 to give me performance anxiety? 72 00:03:03,817 --> 00:03:05,286 That was a lie. We were bored 73 00:03:05,386 --> 00:03:07,521 and couldn't relate to your passion. 74 00:03:09,590 --> 00:03:12,025 ** 75 00:03:12,125 --> 00:03:13,694 The upstairs toilet is overflowing, 76 00:03:13,794 --> 00:03:16,196 and the goddamn plunger is never where it's supposed to be! 77 00:03:16,297 --> 00:03:17,698 -(smartphone clicking) -Ugh! 78 00:03:17,798 --> 00:03:20,634 (both laugh) 79 00:03:20,734 --> 00:03:22,069 -Ugh! -Ugh! 80 00:03:22,169 --> 00:03:23,571 (both laugh) 81 00:03:23,671 --> 00:03:25,439 You crunched my nose! 82 00:03:25,539 --> 00:03:28,141 And -- (laughs) W-Where's your tooth?! 83 00:03:28,242 --> 00:03:29,877 It went right into the wood. 84 00:03:29,977 --> 00:03:31,712 That thing must've been flying! 85 00:03:31,812 --> 00:03:36,083 Well, that's not the only interesting thing on this door. 86 00:03:36,183 --> 00:03:37,885 HAYLEY: Oh, this is where we used to 87 00:03:37,985 --> 00:03:40,254 measure ourselves every year. 88 00:03:40,354 --> 00:03:42,590 Wow. We've all grown so much. 89 00:03:42,690 --> 00:03:44,792 Me, you, Omar. 90 00:03:44,892 --> 00:03:46,994 W-Wait. Who the hell is Omar? 91 00:03:47,094 --> 00:03:49,497 He's got a mark for every year! 92 00:03:49,597 --> 00:03:50,631 My nose hurts. 93 00:03:50,731 --> 00:03:52,566 Forget your nose, forget my tooth. 94 00:03:52,666 --> 00:03:53,801 Let's solve this thing. 95 00:03:53,901 --> 00:03:55,469 But what about the clogged toilet? 96 00:03:55,569 --> 00:03:56,637 Let's forget that, too. 97 00:03:56,737 --> 00:03:58,739 A little dirty water never hurt anybody. 98 00:03:58,839 --> 00:04:00,474 Okay. We're on the case! 99 00:04:00,574 --> 00:04:02,142 What case? I want in. 100 00:04:02,242 --> 00:04:03,911 The case of who Omar is. 101 00:04:04,011 --> 00:04:05,579 You see, there's these markings. 102 00:04:05,679 --> 00:04:07,748 I don't know who Omar is, you jerks! 103 00:04:07,848 --> 00:04:09,517 You're so suspicious! 104 00:04:09,617 --> 00:04:11,685 Do you think that might be a lead we should follow? 105 00:04:11,785 --> 00:04:13,487 I, uh... 106 00:04:13,587 --> 00:04:15,356 Not sure. I-I wasn't paying attention. 107 00:04:15,456 --> 00:04:17,591 I was too busy tonguing my new gum hole. 108 00:04:17,691 --> 00:04:20,361 (squishing) Oh, it feels incredible. 109 00:04:20,461 --> 00:04:22,496 (licking and slurping) 110 00:04:22,596 --> 00:04:24,598 -(snoring) -Roger, I need your help. 111 00:04:24,698 --> 00:04:25,999 (flapping) 112 00:04:26,099 --> 00:04:28,001 Sorry, Stan. I'm a duck today. 113 00:04:28,101 --> 00:04:29,837 I got a lot of duck responsibilities. 114 00:04:29,937 --> 00:04:32,139 I promised Francine I'd go fly fishing again, 115 00:04:32,239 --> 00:04:34,207 but I'm terrible at it, and I don't want to go. 116 00:04:34,308 --> 00:04:35,709 Damn it! I don't know what to do! 117 00:04:35,809 --> 00:04:38,011 -That's it! Dam it! -What? 118 00:04:38,111 --> 00:04:39,880 Dam it. Dam the river! 119 00:04:39,980 --> 00:04:41,181 Yes, damn the river! 120 00:04:41,281 --> 00:04:42,716 Damn it, Stan, you're not getting it! 121 00:04:42,816 --> 00:04:44,217 Wait -- Say that again. 122 00:04:44,318 --> 00:04:45,319 I'm doing duck stuff? 123 00:04:45,419 --> 00:04:46,954 Not that far back. The dam. 124 00:04:47,054 --> 00:04:48,121 I'll build a dam, 125 00:04:48,221 --> 00:04:50,324 then there won't be a river to fly fish in. 126 00:04:50,424 --> 00:04:52,860 And we'd have more time to work on our vaudeville act. 127 00:04:52,960 --> 00:04:54,127 Let's go get some concrete. 128 00:04:54,227 --> 00:04:56,697 Just give me one second. 129 00:04:56,797 --> 00:04:58,366 (ducks quacking) 130 00:04:58,466 --> 00:04:59,800 Quack! Quack-quack! 131 00:04:59,900 --> 00:05:01,502 Quack! Quack-quack-quack! 132 00:05:01,602 --> 00:05:04,237 (ducks quacking) 133 00:05:04,338 --> 00:05:05,639 Let's roll. 134 00:05:07,475 --> 00:05:09,877 (majestic music playing) 135 00:05:09,977 --> 00:05:16,984 ** 136 00:05:17,217 --> 00:05:19,353 And that's the easiest way to get out of 137 00:05:19,453 --> 00:05:20,721 fly fishing with your wife. 138 00:05:20,821 --> 00:05:21,722 (slap) 139 00:05:21,822 --> 00:05:24,558 And now a little reward for Stan. 140 00:05:26,927 --> 00:05:29,863 "Dolly Parton." 141 00:05:29,963 --> 00:05:31,432 You've done it, Stan. 142 00:05:31,532 --> 00:05:35,235 The funniest thing that's ever happened. 143 00:05:35,335 --> 00:05:37,538 Uh...look behind you. 144 00:05:37,638 --> 00:05:40,508 Today's more for putting things behind me than looking. 145 00:05:41,509 --> 00:05:42,910 -Whoa. -(twinkle) 146 00:05:43,010 --> 00:05:44,712 STAN: A giant lake. 147 00:05:44,812 --> 00:05:48,382 And like moths to a flame, here come the lake people. 148 00:05:48,482 --> 00:05:52,786 (laughter and cheering) 149 00:05:52,886 --> 00:05:55,055 -(engine hums) -Whoo-hoo! 150 00:05:55,155 --> 00:05:58,792 Guess I'm gonna have to open a dingy lakeside café, aren't I? 151 00:05:58,892 --> 00:06:02,362 (gulping) Hey! You're the guy that made this lake! 152 00:06:02,463 --> 00:06:03,631 Name's Cleonard. 153 00:06:03,731 --> 00:06:06,567 That's "C" as in Cleonard, "L" as in Leonard, 154 00:06:06,667 --> 00:06:09,570 "E" as in Eonard, "O" as in Onard, 155 00:06:09,670 --> 00:06:12,706 "N" as in Nard, "A" as in Ard, 156 00:06:12,806 --> 00:06:17,244 "R" as in Rd, and "D" as in Dildo. 157 00:06:17,344 --> 00:06:18,612 Have a beer! 158 00:06:18,712 --> 00:06:21,048 Oh! Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa! 159 00:06:21,148 --> 00:06:22,716 -(can tab pops) -(gulping) 160 00:06:22,816 --> 00:06:26,153 Whoa-ho, Lake Man! You're a natural! 161 00:06:26,253 --> 00:06:29,256 ** 162 00:06:29,356 --> 00:06:31,324 You know what, honey? I'm so glad 163 00:06:31,425 --> 00:06:33,661 we're giving fly fishing a second chance. 164 00:06:33,761 --> 00:06:36,430 But wait a second. Where's the dang river? 165 00:06:36,530 --> 00:06:38,599 We're still 10 miles away. 166 00:06:38,699 --> 00:06:41,401 Oh, yes, yes, that -- that's why we can't see the river... 167 00:06:41,502 --> 00:06:43,236 that is still there. 168 00:06:45,072 --> 00:06:46,507 Where's the dang river? 169 00:06:46,607 --> 00:06:47,675 It's been dammed! 170 00:06:47,775 --> 00:06:49,677 Yeah. But by whom? 171 00:06:49,777 --> 00:06:53,246 Guess we have no choice but to check out the dam up yonder. 172 00:06:54,648 --> 00:06:56,850 But who needs answers when you've got... 173 00:06:58,418 --> 00:07:01,121 ...cannonb-a-a-alls?! 174 00:07:01,221 --> 00:07:03,323 What are you still doing in the car? 175 00:07:03,423 --> 00:07:06,359 Jump in, Francine! Feel the muck on your balls! 176 00:07:06,460 --> 00:07:08,629 FRANCINE: You know I don't have balls, Stan! 177 00:07:08,729 --> 00:07:10,030 Prove it! 178 00:07:12,165 --> 00:07:14,968 (banjo music playing) 179 00:07:15,068 --> 00:07:17,471 I know you're disappointed we can't fly fish, 180 00:07:17,571 --> 00:07:18,939 but like Cleonard says, 181 00:07:19,039 --> 00:07:21,609 when God dams a river, he makes a lake. 182 00:07:21,709 --> 00:07:22,843 Who's Cleonard? 183 00:07:22,943 --> 00:07:25,513 That guy over there I just met for the first time. 184 00:07:25,613 --> 00:07:26,780 So, what do you think? 185 00:07:26,880 --> 00:07:29,149 Lake life? Our new couples' thing? 186 00:07:29,249 --> 00:07:30,651 What's lake life? 187 00:07:30,751 --> 00:07:32,052 You know, swimmin', drinkin', 188 00:07:32,152 --> 00:07:33,987 sun burnin', Lyme disease gettin' -- 189 00:07:34,087 --> 00:07:35,022 lake life! 190 00:07:35,122 --> 00:07:38,225 I'm sorry. I'm just bummed about the river. 191 00:07:38,325 --> 00:07:39,359 Oh, come on. 192 00:07:39,459 --> 00:07:41,695 What was your favorite thing about fly fishing? 193 00:07:41,795 --> 00:07:43,897 Well, it was something I really enjoyed 194 00:07:43,997 --> 00:07:45,966 and was really good at. 195 00:07:46,066 --> 00:07:47,901 -(imitates buzzer) You liked...the water! 196 00:07:48,001 --> 00:07:49,136 Well, think about it. 197 00:07:49,236 --> 00:07:51,705 Now you have all that water in one spot. 198 00:07:51,805 --> 00:07:53,006 If you see a patch you like, 199 00:07:53,106 --> 00:07:54,808 you don't have to worry about it rushing by. 200 00:07:54,908 --> 00:07:56,577 It's gonna be there for centuries. 201 00:07:56,677 --> 00:07:58,879 -(flatly) I guess. -That's the spirit! 202 00:07:58,979 --> 00:08:00,914 Look at Cleonard, screamin' at his mom 203 00:08:01,014 --> 00:08:03,183 in front of everyone -- what a baller. 204 00:08:03,283 --> 00:08:05,819 You gotta meet him. 205 00:08:05,919 --> 00:08:08,321 Hey, Cleonard. This is Francine. 206 00:08:08,421 --> 00:08:11,659 Ma'am. Let me introduce y'all to the gang. 207 00:08:11,759 --> 00:08:13,661 This here's Cleonard Jr. 208 00:08:13,761 --> 00:08:15,428 That's Mama, Big Clen, 209 00:08:15,529 --> 00:08:17,497 Tammy, Tammy's man, 210 00:08:17,598 --> 00:08:22,269 Guts, and the lovely Cleonard-Dawn. 211 00:08:22,369 --> 00:08:24,938 Say, we're just about to go bob for pigs' feet. 212 00:08:25,038 --> 00:08:26,339 Y'all interested? 213 00:08:26,439 --> 00:08:28,008 Oh, hell yes! 214 00:08:28,108 --> 00:08:30,043 Oh, I'm good. 215 00:08:30,143 --> 00:08:33,013 I had two monkey hands and a zebra dick for lunch. 216 00:08:33,113 --> 00:08:35,182 Come on! Lake life! 217 00:08:35,282 --> 00:08:37,284 (sighing) Okay. I guess you were gonna 218 00:08:37,384 --> 00:08:39,086 give fly fishing a second chance. 219 00:08:39,186 --> 00:08:41,288 That's right. Remember how surprised I was 220 00:08:41,388 --> 00:08:42,723 the river was gone? 221 00:08:42,823 --> 00:08:43,724 Twice. 222 00:08:43,824 --> 00:08:45,192 On my count! 223 00:08:46,259 --> 00:08:48,228 One! 224 00:08:48,328 --> 00:08:49,529 Go! 225 00:08:49,630 --> 00:08:51,632 ** 226 00:08:51,732 --> 00:08:53,867 (laughs, gurgles) 227 00:08:53,967 --> 00:08:55,402 -Unh! -(crunch) 228 00:08:55,502 --> 00:08:57,037 (crunch) 229 00:08:57,137 --> 00:08:59,139 Mnh! 230 00:08:59,239 --> 00:09:00,608 (laughs, gurgles) 231 00:09:00,708 --> 00:09:01,875 ** 232 00:09:01,975 --> 00:09:03,076 (retches) 233 00:09:03,176 --> 00:09:05,979 (distorted vomiting) 234 00:09:06,079 --> 00:09:13,086 ** 235 00:09:13,654 --> 00:09:14,588 (whistles) 236 00:09:14,688 --> 00:09:16,456 Pbth! I got seven! 237 00:09:16,556 --> 00:09:17,758 You win! 238 00:09:17,858 --> 00:09:21,762 Let's hear it for Lake Man and his wife, Vomit! 239 00:09:21,862 --> 00:09:23,430 -(cheers and applause) -(gasps) You got a nickname! 240 00:09:23,530 --> 00:09:26,900 What a power couple. Lake Man and Vomit. 241 00:09:27,000 --> 00:09:28,401 ** 242 00:09:28,501 --> 00:09:32,272 Grape, grape, grape. 243 00:09:32,372 --> 00:09:33,807 Yum. 244 00:09:33,907 --> 00:09:35,676 Rogu, stop fussing with those olives. 245 00:09:35,776 --> 00:09:38,278 Steve and Hayley found the name "Omar" written on the door, 246 00:09:38,378 --> 00:09:40,781 and I have to get something off my chest. 247 00:09:40,881 --> 00:09:42,515 You're the only one I can tell. 248 00:09:42,616 --> 00:09:45,352 Omar is my son. 249 00:09:45,452 --> 00:09:47,254 Oh, my God! 250 00:09:47,354 --> 00:09:50,457 Or at least I've come to think of him as my son. 251 00:09:51,692 --> 00:09:55,696 Rogu need more information. 252 00:09:55,796 --> 00:09:57,831 A long time ago, I saw a boy 253 00:09:57,931 --> 00:09:59,466 in a Country Time Lemonade commercial, 254 00:09:59,566 --> 00:10:03,203 and since then, I imagined that he was mine. 255 00:10:03,303 --> 00:10:06,339 I guess that's the whole story. Huh. 256 00:10:06,439 --> 00:10:08,275 (gasps) Oh! And I've been guessing at his height 257 00:10:08,375 --> 00:10:09,509 and marking it on the door. 258 00:10:09,609 --> 00:10:10,944 Busted! 259 00:10:11,044 --> 00:10:13,113 We knew you had something to do with Omar! 260 00:10:13,213 --> 00:10:16,717 And we knew you'd come spillin' your guts to Rogu. 261 00:10:16,817 --> 00:10:18,285 Everyone does. 262 00:10:18,385 --> 00:10:20,688 You used Rogu as a honeypot?! 263 00:10:20,788 --> 00:10:23,724 You got Rogu'd. 264 00:10:23,824 --> 00:10:26,159 (laughter) 265 00:10:26,259 --> 00:10:28,796 (crying) 266 00:10:28,896 --> 00:10:30,530 Buddy, don't feel bad. 267 00:10:30,630 --> 00:10:33,834 It was just...kind of a game or something. I don't know. 268 00:10:33,934 --> 00:10:37,637 I'm so sad and alone... 269 00:10:37,738 --> 00:10:39,539 and sad. 270 00:10:39,639 --> 00:10:41,341 All right. Let's help him with this, 271 00:10:41,441 --> 00:10:43,243 and then we'll fix our nose and teeth. 272 00:10:44,878 --> 00:10:46,814 (engine hums) 273 00:10:46,914 --> 00:10:50,250 Whoo-hoo-hoo! That all you got, Junior?! 274 00:10:50,350 --> 00:10:52,352 -(engine revs) -Aah! Aah! Aah! 275 00:10:52,452 --> 00:10:53,520 STAN: Whoo! Whoo! 276 00:10:53,620 --> 00:10:55,723 (Francine grunting) 277 00:10:59,192 --> 00:11:00,861 How great is lake life? 278 00:11:00,961 --> 00:11:02,562 Let's fire it up again, Junior. 279 00:11:02,662 --> 00:11:05,933 I think I might sit this one out, swim to shore. 280 00:11:06,033 --> 00:11:10,070 Swim in? Sounds like we got ourselves a lake-aholic, Junior. 281 00:11:10,170 --> 00:11:11,604 I'm a lake-aholic, too, 282 00:11:11,705 --> 00:11:15,342 except with alcohol and meth and unprotected sex! 283 00:11:15,442 --> 00:11:17,210 I'm gonna beat it, though, 'cause I ordered 284 00:11:17,310 --> 00:11:20,047 a fidget spinner, and it's on its way. 285 00:11:20,147 --> 00:11:24,517 ** 286 00:11:24,617 --> 00:11:25,786 Hey, Roger. 287 00:11:25,886 --> 00:11:27,420 Turns out my grill's a little small. 288 00:11:27,520 --> 00:11:29,723 We're running about six to seven hours behind. 289 00:11:29,823 --> 00:11:32,960 Who ordered a grilled cheese at 11:00 a.m.?! 290 00:11:33,060 --> 00:11:36,563 Yours now if you want it. 291 00:11:36,663 --> 00:11:39,466 (indistinct conversations) 292 00:11:39,566 --> 00:11:42,202 Yoink! Lake life is awesome! 293 00:11:42,302 --> 00:11:44,271 Cleonard shot an osprey with a crossbow, 294 00:11:44,371 --> 00:11:46,774 and we're gonna bang it open with a rock! 295 00:11:46,874 --> 00:11:48,541 Cleonard, from the lake. 296 00:11:48,641 --> 00:11:52,445 Stan, it's been a long day. When can we go home? 297 00:11:52,545 --> 00:11:55,248 Not yet! Cleonard shot an osprey with a crossbow, 298 00:11:55,348 --> 00:11:57,885 and we're gonna bang it open with a rock! 299 00:11:59,152 --> 00:12:00,821 FRANCINE: Ding! 300 00:12:02,990 --> 00:12:05,225 Hey, Roger, I'm borrowing this. 301 00:12:05,325 --> 00:12:07,227 Sorry. I just wanted to check on my turkey burger. 302 00:12:07,327 --> 00:12:09,462 This isn't McDonald's, sir! Check back in the morning! 303 00:12:09,562 --> 00:12:10,663 (tongs clack) 304 00:12:10,764 --> 00:12:13,166 ** 305 00:12:13,266 --> 00:12:15,235 It's like... why am I tracking the height 306 00:12:15,335 --> 00:12:18,505 of a boy I've only seen in commercials? 307 00:12:18,605 --> 00:12:21,741 I think television is extremely dangerous for me. 308 00:12:21,842 --> 00:12:23,510 It makes me feel like I know him. 309 00:12:23,610 --> 00:12:25,612 But maybe you can know him, Klaus. 310 00:12:25,712 --> 00:12:26,613 What? 311 00:12:26,713 --> 00:12:28,615 Omar is real. 312 00:12:28,715 --> 00:12:31,184 He's real and he's alive and he's out there. 313 00:12:31,284 --> 00:12:34,354 We found him on Cameo, and he's actually available 314 00:12:34,454 --> 00:12:36,523 to make personal appearances for an extra fee. 315 00:12:36,623 --> 00:12:37,925 You know I have no money! 316 00:12:38,025 --> 00:12:40,293 I'll cover it. I got a little cabbage 317 00:12:40,393 --> 00:12:42,362 comin' from the tooth fairy. 318 00:12:42,462 --> 00:12:44,865 Look, you have a lot of real love for him, 319 00:12:44,965 --> 00:12:47,100 a-and maybe that's something he's looking for. 320 00:12:47,200 --> 00:12:48,768 Y-You might not be able to be his dad, 321 00:12:48,869 --> 00:12:52,172 but you could be, I dunno, a-a mentor. 322 00:12:52,272 --> 00:12:53,974 Or he could mentor you? 323 00:12:54,074 --> 00:12:57,644 Or maybe just get in a room and see who mentors who. 324 00:12:57,744 --> 00:13:00,047 Okay. Let's reach out to him. 325 00:13:00,147 --> 00:13:02,315 I'm gonna go to my alcove and get all my farts out 326 00:13:02,415 --> 00:13:03,783 before he comes. 327 00:13:03,884 --> 00:13:07,287 I suggest you all do the same. 328 00:13:07,387 --> 00:13:10,523 Maybe this dumb lake's good for something. 329 00:13:10,623 --> 00:13:14,161 Ow. Is that my ass or the dam? 330 00:13:17,230 --> 00:13:20,800 (laughs) That's a funny bit. 331 00:13:20,901 --> 00:13:23,837 Stan always does that bit. 332 00:13:23,937 --> 00:13:26,006 Stan always does that bit! 333 00:13:26,106 --> 00:13:29,142 That little bitch built a secret dam! 334 00:13:29,242 --> 00:13:31,478 ** 335 00:13:31,578 --> 00:13:34,081 Stan, come with me! We need to talk! 336 00:13:34,181 --> 00:13:35,515 Just tell me in front of Cleonard. 337 00:13:35,615 --> 00:13:37,350 I'm gonna tell him the second you leave, anyway. 338 00:13:37,450 --> 00:13:38,718 I tell Cleonard everything. 339 00:13:38,818 --> 00:13:41,688 Fine. I know you built the dam! 340 00:13:41,788 --> 00:13:44,724 Ooh! Sounds like somebody's getting laid tonight. 341 00:13:44,824 --> 00:13:45,893 (gulping) 342 00:13:45,993 --> 00:13:47,260 (suspenseful chord strikes) 343 00:13:47,360 --> 00:13:49,662 Honey, we -- we don't need to go in there. 344 00:13:49,762 --> 00:13:53,000 You dammed a river because you didn't want 345 00:13:53,100 --> 00:13:55,668 to give fly fishing a second chance! 346 00:13:56,836 --> 00:13:58,906 FRANCINE: Damn your dam. 347 00:13:59,006 --> 00:14:01,374 (rocket whooshes) 348 00:14:04,044 --> 00:14:06,679 (crumbling) 349 00:14:08,081 --> 00:14:09,249 (water splashes) 350 00:14:09,349 --> 00:14:11,251 See ya, turds! 351 00:14:11,351 --> 00:14:14,854 Hey, Stan, tell Roger to have my chicken tenders 352 00:14:14,955 --> 00:14:18,025 delivered to my balls! 353 00:14:18,125 --> 00:14:21,294 (up-tempo banjo music plays) 354 00:14:21,394 --> 00:14:23,396 ** 355 00:14:23,496 --> 00:14:26,233 That lady ruined our lake! 356 00:14:26,333 --> 00:14:28,868 She's deeeeaaad! 357 00:14:28,969 --> 00:14:30,703 (indistinct shouting and hollering) 358 00:14:30,803 --> 00:14:33,806 Cleonard, my man, the lake was only here for a day. 359 00:14:33,907 --> 00:14:35,542 You don't need to do anything crazy. 360 00:14:35,642 --> 00:14:39,412 Of course we do, Stan. We're crazy lake people. 361 00:14:39,512 --> 00:14:40,914 Let's git 'er! 362 00:14:41,014 --> 00:14:44,151 (indistinct shouting) 363 00:14:44,251 --> 00:14:45,919 I got a crush on you, Stan. 364 00:14:47,054 --> 00:14:49,889 (engine revs, women giggle) 365 00:14:49,990 --> 00:14:51,992 Oh, my God! 366 00:14:52,092 --> 00:14:54,394 Tammy's crushing on me?! 367 00:14:56,496 --> 00:14:58,932 ** 368 00:14:59,032 --> 00:15:00,934 The hillbillies want to kill Francine 369 00:15:01,034 --> 00:15:02,469 because she destroyed the lake! 370 00:15:02,569 --> 00:15:04,504 Oh, thank God this is over. 371 00:15:04,604 --> 00:15:06,773 I was playing it cool, but I was in over my head. 372 00:15:06,873 --> 00:15:08,508 Come on. We can still get a jump on them. 373 00:15:08,608 --> 00:15:09,977 Cleonard can't find his Croakies, 374 00:15:10,077 --> 00:15:11,111 so they haven't left yet. 375 00:15:11,211 --> 00:15:13,346 Okay. Just let me grab my stuff. 376 00:15:13,446 --> 00:15:15,615 Did you really need all this junk? 377 00:15:15,715 --> 00:15:17,017 You caught me after my Costco run. 378 00:15:17,117 --> 00:15:18,785 What am I supposed to do, just leave behind 379 00:15:18,885 --> 00:15:21,521 a 13-pound bag of pitted dates? 380 00:15:21,621 --> 00:15:22,956 -No. -Hey, can you guide 381 00:15:23,056 --> 00:15:25,525 that jumbo hand sanitizer this way? 382 00:15:25,625 --> 00:15:27,927 Had my hand up a possum's butt all morning. 383 00:15:28,028 --> 00:15:30,497 You know what they say -- customer's always right. 384 00:15:30,597 --> 00:15:31,698 I was the customer. 385 00:15:31,798 --> 00:15:33,433 CLEONARD: Hey, Lake Man! 386 00:15:33,533 --> 00:15:35,768 Any sign of Vomit yet?! 387 00:15:35,868 --> 00:15:38,838 I told you, Cleonard! I won't help you hunt my wife! 388 00:15:38,938 --> 00:15:40,473 Oh, yeah. 389 00:15:40,573 --> 00:15:42,609 Well, can you at least ask the grill guy 390 00:15:42,709 --> 00:15:45,378 if he has any ice-cream sandwiches? 391 00:15:47,547 --> 00:15:48,515 He does. 392 00:15:48,615 --> 00:15:49,816 Okay, great! 393 00:15:49,916 --> 00:15:52,885 Ask him if he takes wet checks! 394 00:15:53,686 --> 00:15:55,455 CLEONARD: He does! 395 00:15:55,555 --> 00:15:57,957 ** 396 00:15:58,058 --> 00:16:01,361 Okay. Three pitchers of Country Time Lemonade. 397 00:16:01,461 --> 00:16:04,064 That should be enough to get us through the first hour. 398 00:16:04,164 --> 00:16:05,732 I hope it's still his favorite. 399 00:16:05,832 --> 00:16:07,034 (knocking) 400 00:16:09,302 --> 00:16:12,072 Hi. I'm Omar from the Country Time Lemonade commercial. 401 00:16:12,172 --> 00:16:13,340 We know. 402 00:16:13,440 --> 00:16:16,043 I was also in Tremors 5: Bloodlines. 403 00:16:16,143 --> 00:16:18,045 Please, come in. 404 00:16:20,680 --> 00:16:22,749 This is Klaus. 405 00:16:22,849 --> 00:16:25,485 He only knows you from your lemonade commercials. 406 00:16:27,154 --> 00:16:29,722 It's not easy to explain or even understand, 407 00:16:29,822 --> 00:16:32,825 but something about you appealed to Klaus, 408 00:16:32,925 --> 00:16:35,062 and he started to think of you as a son. 409 00:16:35,162 --> 00:16:38,098 He has a lot of love for you, and I think he's here today to 410 00:16:38,198 --> 00:16:41,834 ask if that would be something you're open to sharing. 411 00:16:43,570 --> 00:16:46,005 Wow. That's a pretty strange offer. 412 00:16:46,106 --> 00:16:49,909 But, honestly, I'd be really open to this. 413 00:16:50,009 --> 00:16:53,846 I'm lonely. And maybe you are, too. 414 00:16:53,946 --> 00:16:56,616 And maybe, together, we won't have to be. 415 00:16:56,716 --> 00:16:59,086 -How tall are you?! -I'm sorry? 416 00:16:59,186 --> 00:17:01,954 How tall are you?! Omar! 417 00:17:02,055 --> 00:17:03,390 I'm 5'7"? 418 00:17:03,490 --> 00:17:05,225 That's not right! 419 00:17:06,626 --> 00:17:07,960 Klaus, what are you doing? 420 00:17:08,061 --> 00:17:10,430 Get against the door! We'll see who's right! 421 00:17:10,530 --> 00:17:12,899 -There's the plunger! Can I -- -I'm using it on Omar! 422 00:17:12,999 --> 00:17:15,735 -I actually have to go. -Are you insane?! 423 00:17:15,835 --> 00:17:17,470 I have to measure you! 424 00:17:17,570 --> 00:17:18,571 (door slams) 425 00:17:18,671 --> 00:17:20,540 Did he just run out of the house? 426 00:17:20,640 --> 00:17:22,775 What a Hollyweirdo. 427 00:17:22,875 --> 00:17:24,577 It's a real lesson. 428 00:17:24,677 --> 00:17:27,280 Don't meet your Hollyweird heroes. 429 00:17:27,380 --> 00:17:28,481 (water trickling) 430 00:17:28,581 --> 00:17:31,284 And here comes the toilet water. 431 00:17:31,384 --> 00:17:33,820 Keep your eyes peeled. Francine's probably close. 432 00:17:33,920 --> 00:17:35,722 This is right around where she took us fishing. 433 00:17:35,822 --> 00:17:40,260 Hey, Stan, I double-dog dare you to murder your wife! 434 00:17:40,360 --> 00:17:41,828 Man, this has been going on for hours. 435 00:17:41,928 --> 00:17:44,264 We gotta lose these guys. Cut your tubes loose. 436 00:17:44,364 --> 00:17:46,466 Maybe they'll trip them up. -Not my tubes! 437 00:17:46,566 --> 00:17:48,568 Well, there must be another way, Stan! 438 00:17:48,668 --> 00:17:50,770 Oh! Maybe we can creatively harness 439 00:17:50,870 --> 00:17:52,739 the untapped power of the trees. 440 00:17:52,839 --> 00:17:54,274 Francine's life is at stake! 441 00:17:54,374 --> 00:17:58,611 Ugh. Fiiine. You're so obsessed with her. 442 00:18:01,914 --> 00:18:04,984 My tree idea is lookin' pretty good right now. 443 00:18:05,852 --> 00:18:07,287 The river cuts back. 444 00:18:07,387 --> 00:18:09,689 Hey, what if we jump out, run across the land, 445 00:18:09,789 --> 00:18:11,191 then get back in on the other side? 446 00:18:11,291 --> 00:18:12,959 It'll be much faster than taking 447 00:18:13,059 --> 00:18:15,195 this lazy-ass river all the way around. 448 00:18:15,295 --> 00:18:18,198 STAN: That's...a great idea. 449 00:18:20,032 --> 00:18:22,001 What a shortcut! Top-notch idea! 450 00:18:22,101 --> 00:18:25,104 ROGER: I'm loving the positive reinforcement, Stan! 451 00:18:27,174 --> 00:18:30,510 (owl hooting) 452 00:18:30,610 --> 00:18:32,879 Whoa! Check out the beautiful owl! 453 00:18:32,979 --> 00:18:34,481 Aah! 454 00:18:34,581 --> 00:18:37,484 It must've smelled possum butt on my knuckles! 455 00:18:37,584 --> 00:18:38,951 Oh, well. Bye! 456 00:18:39,051 --> 00:18:40,353 (water rushing) 457 00:18:40,453 --> 00:18:42,355 (ominous music plays) 458 00:18:42,455 --> 00:18:45,358 Aah! Oh! Aah! Ah! 459 00:18:45,458 --> 00:18:47,360 (grunting) 460 00:18:47,460 --> 00:18:48,561 Aaaah! 461 00:18:48,661 --> 00:18:50,463 ** 462 00:18:50,563 --> 00:18:52,499 Ah... 463 00:18:52,599 --> 00:18:57,136 ** 464 00:18:59,739 --> 00:19:02,175 (coughing) 465 00:19:02,275 --> 00:19:05,212 Francine! Can you stop fly fishing for one second 466 00:19:05,312 --> 00:19:07,146 and listen to me? We gotta run! 467 00:19:07,247 --> 00:19:08,848 The hillbillies are trying to hunt you down! 468 00:19:08,948 --> 00:19:10,483 Why should I believe you? 469 00:19:10,583 --> 00:19:13,720 Everything you do is for selfish reasons. 470 00:19:13,820 --> 00:19:14,754 Name one time. 471 00:19:14,854 --> 00:19:17,424 You built a dam so I couldn't fish! 472 00:19:17,524 --> 00:19:19,759 Oh, well, you knocked that one out of the park. 473 00:19:19,859 --> 00:19:21,228 How long you been sittin' on that? 474 00:19:21,328 --> 00:19:22,495 CLEONARD: There she is! 475 00:19:22,595 --> 00:19:24,197 (banjo music plays) 476 00:19:24,297 --> 00:19:27,166 I got this. Go hide while I save our lives. 477 00:19:28,100 --> 00:19:31,070 Cleonard, you've made me the happiest man on Earth. 478 00:19:31,170 --> 00:19:33,873 But I'm going to have to ask you not to kill my wife. 479 00:19:33,906 --> 00:19:35,608 -(bow clicks) -(whoosh) 480 00:19:35,708 --> 00:19:39,546 Stan, it's time for you to finally let me 481 00:19:39,646 --> 00:19:41,514 do something I'm good at. 482 00:19:41,614 --> 00:19:43,182 Go hide! 483 00:19:43,283 --> 00:19:45,051 ** 484 00:19:45,151 --> 00:19:46,085 (weapons cock) 485 00:19:46,185 --> 00:19:48,588 (whooshing) 486 00:19:48,688 --> 00:19:51,524 ** 487 00:19:51,624 --> 00:19:54,261 (knife scrapes) 488 00:19:54,361 --> 00:19:57,730 -(pop) -My eye! My eye! 489 00:19:57,830 --> 00:20:00,032 Wait! That was my lazy eye! 490 00:20:00,132 --> 00:20:01,601 My good eye's still good! 491 00:20:01,701 --> 00:20:03,102 -(whip, pop) -Aah! 492 00:20:03,202 --> 00:20:05,438 I'm almost out of eyes! 493 00:20:05,538 --> 00:20:07,740 Don't take my Pan's Labyrint eyes! 494 00:20:07,840 --> 00:20:09,876 (whip, pop, whip, pop) 495 00:20:09,976 --> 00:20:11,878 (screaming) 496 00:20:11,978 --> 00:20:13,913 Unh! (screams) 497 00:20:14,013 --> 00:20:15,548 Who else wants some?! 498 00:20:22,088 --> 00:20:24,624 Wow! That was incredible, Francine! 499 00:20:24,724 --> 00:20:25,958 Told you I was good. 500 00:20:26,058 --> 00:20:27,560 I'm sorry I dammed your river 501 00:20:27,660 --> 00:20:29,762 just because I'm bad at fly fishing. 502 00:20:29,862 --> 00:20:31,564 But now I realize -- 503 00:20:31,664 --> 00:20:32,999 Aaaaaaaaaaaaah! 504 00:20:33,099 --> 00:20:34,834 Oh, my God! Roger! 505 00:20:34,934 --> 00:20:37,437 I'll be fine. Nothing a little hand sanitizer 506 00:20:37,537 --> 00:20:40,340 and 32 cans of water chestnuts can't fix. 507 00:20:40,440 --> 00:20:42,975 I-I just gotta head upriver and find my supplies. 508 00:20:43,075 --> 00:20:44,911 (owl hoots) 509 00:20:45,011 --> 00:20:47,246 Let's get out of here. 510 00:20:50,082 --> 00:20:53,820 Where are you?! Where are you?! 511 00:20:53,920 --> 00:20:56,623 -(thud) -There you are. 512 00:20:56,723 --> 00:20:57,824 (can tab pops) 513 00:20:57,924 --> 00:21:00,460 (gulps) Ahhh! 514 00:21:00,560 --> 00:21:02,128 (smacks lips) 515 00:21:02,228 --> 00:21:04,096 Bye! Have a great time! 516 00:21:06,198 --> 00:21:08,100 -- Captions by VITAC -- 33853

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