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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,056 --> 00:00:04,893 (reel casts) 2 00:00:04,993 --> 00:00:07,862 I have a good feeling about this. 3 00:00:07,962 --> 00:00:10,432 I think fly fishing may have what it takes 4 00:00:10,532 --> 00:00:12,301 to be our new couples' activity. 5 00:00:12,401 --> 00:00:14,769 Jury's still out on the fishing, but I will say, it was 6 00:00:14,869 --> 00:00:17,472 pretty awesome hitting that squirrel on the drive up here. 7 00:00:17,572 --> 00:00:20,309 (reel casts) 8 00:00:20,409 --> 00:00:24,213 Ooh! I think I got one! 9 00:00:24,313 --> 00:00:25,814 STAN: Beginner's luck. 10 00:00:25,914 --> 00:00:27,216 (straining) 11 00:00:31,052 --> 00:00:32,487 (fish grunting) 12 00:00:32,587 --> 00:00:34,789 Beat it! Your kind isn't wanted here! 13 00:00:37,392 --> 00:00:40,262 FRANCINE: Don't worry, Stan. You'll get one. 14 00:00:40,362 --> 00:00:41,796 Ooh, ooh! I got one, too! 15 00:00:41,896 --> 00:00:42,964 -(reel cranking) -(grunting) 16 00:00:43,064 --> 00:00:45,467 Oh, it's really fighting me, Francine. 17 00:00:45,567 --> 00:00:47,669 Did it hurt your balls when you reeled yours in? 18 00:00:47,769 --> 00:00:49,904 Stan, I think it's just stuck on your -- 19 00:00:50,004 --> 00:00:52,307 -(fabric rips) -Oh, it got away! 20 00:00:52,407 --> 00:00:54,776 But, oh-ho-ho! It was a big one! 21 00:00:54,876 --> 00:00:57,011 42 waist. Same size as me. 22 00:00:57,112 --> 00:00:58,747 I'm gonna ask him where he buys his pants. 23 00:00:58,847 --> 00:01:00,649 (inhales deeply) 24 00:01:00,749 --> 00:01:02,351 (reel casts) 25 00:01:04,018 --> 00:01:07,021 It was quiet down there. Really gave me time to think. 26 00:01:07,122 --> 00:01:08,490 I realize now... 27 00:01:08,590 --> 00:01:12,026 it was my underwear. 28 00:01:12,127 --> 00:01:14,529 (patriotic music plays) 29 00:01:14,629 --> 00:01:17,199 * Good morning, U.S.A. * 30 00:01:17,299 --> 00:01:21,035 * I got a feelin' that it's gonna be a wonderful day * 31 00:01:21,136 --> 00:01:24,273 * The sun in the sky has a smile on his face * 32 00:01:24,373 --> 00:01:28,543 * And he's shinin' a salute to the American race * 33 00:01:30,445 --> 00:01:33,682 * Oh, boy, it's swell to say * 34 00:01:33,782 --> 00:01:35,984 -* Good -- * -* Good morning, U.S.A. * 35 00:01:36,084 --> 00:01:37,319 Aah! 36 00:01:38,620 --> 00:01:41,990 * Good morning, U.S.A. * 37 00:01:42,090 --> 00:01:44,493 ** 38 00:01:44,593 --> 00:01:47,362 Mm-mmm! This trout's delicious! 39 00:01:47,462 --> 00:01:48,730 So good! 40 00:01:48,830 --> 00:01:50,499 I like to take a big bite of fish... 41 00:01:50,599 --> 00:01:51,966 and then a big sip of milk... 42 00:01:52,066 --> 00:01:54,969 and then swish it all together in my mouth like this. 43 00:01:55,069 --> 00:01:57,406 (swishing) 44 00:01:57,506 --> 00:02:01,176 Ahh! It's like trouted milk balls. 45 00:02:01,276 --> 00:02:03,512 So it seems like fly fishing was a success? 46 00:02:03,612 --> 00:02:05,314 It was wonderful. 47 00:02:05,414 --> 00:02:08,650 So beautiful and peaceful out there. 48 00:02:08,750 --> 00:02:11,220 Yes, but we're obviously never doing it again. 49 00:02:11,320 --> 00:02:13,422 That was an audition for a couples' activity, 50 00:02:13,522 --> 00:02:14,556 and it failed. 51 00:02:14,656 --> 00:02:17,226 The couple tried it, the couple didn't like it, 52 00:02:17,326 --> 00:02:19,228 and now the couple will... 53 00:02:19,328 --> 00:02:21,730 * Put it on the boarrrd * 54 00:02:21,830 --> 00:02:24,366 This isn't a couples' rejection board! 55 00:02:24,466 --> 00:02:27,269 It's just a list of things we did that you didn't like. 56 00:02:27,369 --> 00:02:28,837 I'm not changing the sign, Francine. 57 00:02:28,937 --> 00:02:32,040 We only tried all these things once! 58 00:02:32,140 --> 00:02:34,276 Can't we give fly fishing another chance? 59 00:02:34,376 --> 00:02:35,910 No. W-Why can't we give 60 00:02:36,010 --> 00:02:38,079 Couples' Loan Sharking another chance? 61 00:02:38,179 --> 00:02:40,382 Because the mob came after us 62 00:02:40,482 --> 00:02:42,684 for stepping on their turf, remember?! 63 00:02:42,784 --> 00:02:44,253 They broke your wrist! 64 00:02:44,353 --> 00:02:46,288 Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, they were right to do that. 65 00:02:46,388 --> 00:02:47,556 I was not getting the picture. 66 00:02:47,656 --> 00:02:51,260 Please, Stan. I really loved fly fishing. 67 00:02:51,360 --> 00:02:55,797 (sighs) You know I can't say no to those beautiful black pupils. 68 00:02:55,897 --> 00:02:57,732 Let's give it another shot. 69 00:02:57,832 --> 00:03:00,435 Hey. "Steve's dance recitals"? 70 00:03:00,535 --> 00:03:02,070 I thought you stopped coming because you didn't want 71 00:03:02,170 --> 00:03:03,738 to give me performance anxiety? 72 00:03:03,838 --> 00:03:05,307 That was a lie. We were bored 73 00:03:05,407 --> 00:03:07,542 and couldn't relate to your passion. 74 00:03:09,611 --> 00:03:12,046 ** 75 00:03:12,146 --> 00:03:13,715 The upstairs toilet is overflowing, 76 00:03:13,815 --> 00:03:16,217 and the goddamn plunger is never where it's supposed to be! 77 00:03:16,318 --> 00:03:17,719 -(smartphone clicking) -Ugh! 78 00:03:17,819 --> 00:03:20,655 (both laugh) 79 00:03:20,755 --> 00:03:22,090 -Ugh! -Ugh! 80 00:03:22,190 --> 00:03:23,592 (both laugh) 81 00:03:23,692 --> 00:03:25,460 You crunched my nose! 82 00:03:25,560 --> 00:03:28,162 And -- (laughs) W-Where's your tooth?! 83 00:03:28,263 --> 00:03:29,898 It went right into the wood. 84 00:03:29,998 --> 00:03:31,733 That thing must've been flying! 85 00:03:31,833 --> 00:03:36,104 Well, that's not the only interesting thing on this door. 86 00:03:36,204 --> 00:03:37,906 HAYLEY: Oh, this is where we used to 87 00:03:38,006 --> 00:03:40,275 measure ourselves every year. 88 00:03:40,375 --> 00:03:42,611 Wow. We've all grown so much. 89 00:03:42,711 --> 00:03:44,813 Me, you, Omar. 90 00:03:44,913 --> 00:03:47,015 W-Wait. Who the hell is Omar? 91 00:03:47,115 --> 00:03:49,518 He's got a mark for every year! 92 00:03:49,618 --> 00:03:50,652 My nose hurts. 93 00:03:50,752 --> 00:03:52,587 Forget your nose, forget my tooth. 94 00:03:52,687 --> 00:03:53,822 Let's solve this thing. 95 00:03:53,922 --> 00:03:55,490 But what about the clogged toilet? 96 00:03:55,590 --> 00:03:56,658 Let's forget that, too. 97 00:03:56,758 --> 00:03:58,760 A little dirty water never hurt anybody. 98 00:03:58,860 --> 00:04:00,495 Okay. We're on the case! 99 00:04:00,595 --> 00:04:02,163 What case? I want in. 100 00:04:02,263 --> 00:04:03,932 The case of who Omar is. 101 00:04:04,032 --> 00:04:05,600 You see, there's these markings. 102 00:04:05,700 --> 00:04:07,769 I don't know who Omar is, you jerks! 103 00:04:07,869 --> 00:04:09,538 You're so suspicious! 104 00:04:09,638 --> 00:04:11,706 Do you think that might be a lead we should follow? 105 00:04:11,806 --> 00:04:13,508 I, uh... 106 00:04:13,608 --> 00:04:15,377 Not sure. I-I wasn't paying attention. 107 00:04:15,477 --> 00:04:17,612 I was too busy tonguing my new gum hole. 108 00:04:17,712 --> 00:04:20,382 (squishing) Oh, it feels incredible. 109 00:04:20,482 --> 00:04:22,517 (licking and slurping) 110 00:04:22,617 --> 00:04:24,619 -(snoring) -Roger, I need your help. 111 00:04:24,719 --> 00:04:26,020 (flapping) 112 00:04:26,120 --> 00:04:28,022 Sorry, Stan. I'm a duck today. 113 00:04:28,122 --> 00:04:29,858 I got a lot of duck responsibilities. 114 00:04:29,958 --> 00:04:32,160 I promised Francine I'd go fly fishing again, 115 00:04:32,260 --> 00:04:34,228 but I'm terrible at it, and I don't want to go. 116 00:04:34,329 --> 00:04:35,730 Damn it! I don't know what to do! 117 00:04:35,830 --> 00:04:38,032 -That's it! Dam it! -What? 118 00:04:38,132 --> 00:04:39,901 Dam it. Dam the river! 119 00:04:40,001 --> 00:04:41,202 Yes, damn the river! 120 00:04:41,302 --> 00:04:42,737 Damn it, Stan, you're not getting it! 121 00:04:42,837 --> 00:04:44,238 Wait -- Say that again. 122 00:04:44,339 --> 00:04:45,340 I'm doing duck stuff? 123 00:04:45,440 --> 00:04:46,975 Not that far back. The dam. 124 00:04:47,075 --> 00:04:48,142 I'll build a dam, 125 00:04:48,242 --> 00:04:50,345 then there won't be a river to fly fish in. 126 00:04:50,445 --> 00:04:52,881 And we'd have more time to work on our vaudeville act. 127 00:04:52,981 --> 00:04:54,148 Let's go get some concrete. 128 00:04:54,248 --> 00:04:56,718 Just give me one second. 129 00:04:56,818 --> 00:04:58,387 (ducks quacking) 130 00:04:58,487 --> 00:04:59,821 Quack! Quack-quack! 131 00:04:59,921 --> 00:05:01,523 Quack! Quack-quack-quack! 132 00:05:01,623 --> 00:05:04,258 (ducks quacking) 133 00:05:04,359 --> 00:05:05,660 Let's roll. 134 00:05:07,496 --> 00:05:09,898 (majestic music playing) 135 00:05:09,998 --> 00:05:17,005 ** 136 00:05:17,238 --> 00:05:19,374 And that's the easiest way to get out of 137 00:05:19,474 --> 00:05:20,742 fly fishing with your wife. 138 00:05:20,842 --> 00:05:21,743 (slap) 139 00:05:21,843 --> 00:05:24,579 And now a little reward for Stan. 140 00:05:26,948 --> 00:05:29,884 "Dolly Parton." 141 00:05:29,984 --> 00:05:31,453 You've done it, Stan. 142 00:05:31,553 --> 00:05:35,256 The funniest thing that's ever happened. 143 00:05:35,356 --> 00:05:37,559 Uh...look behind you. 144 00:05:37,659 --> 00:05:40,529 Today's more for putting things behind me than looking. 145 00:05:41,530 --> 00:05:42,931 -Whoa. -(twinkle) 146 00:05:43,031 --> 00:05:44,733 STAN: A giant lake. 147 00:05:44,833 --> 00:05:48,403 And like moths to a flame, here come the lake people. 148 00:05:48,503 --> 00:05:52,807 (laughter and cheering) 149 00:05:52,907 --> 00:05:55,076 -(engine hums) -Whoo-hoo! 150 00:05:55,176 --> 00:05:58,813 Guess I'm gonna have to open a dingy lakeside café, aren't I? 151 00:05:58,913 --> 00:06:02,383 (gulping) Hey! You're the guy that made this lake! 152 00:06:02,484 --> 00:06:03,652 Name's Cleonard. 153 00:06:03,752 --> 00:06:06,588 That's "C" as in Cleonard, "L" as in Leonard, 154 00:06:06,688 --> 00:06:09,591 "E" as in Eonard, "O" as in Onard, 155 00:06:09,691 --> 00:06:12,727 "N" as in Nard, "A" as in Ard, 156 00:06:12,827 --> 00:06:17,265 "R" as in Rd, and "D" as in Dildo. 157 00:06:17,365 --> 00:06:18,633 Have a beer! 158 00:06:18,733 --> 00:06:21,069 Oh! Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa! 159 00:06:21,169 --> 00:06:22,737 -(can tab pops) -(gulping) 160 00:06:22,837 --> 00:06:26,174 Whoa-ho, Lake Man! You're a natural! 161 00:06:26,274 --> 00:06:29,277 ** 162 00:06:29,377 --> 00:06:31,345 You know what, honey? I'm so glad 163 00:06:31,446 --> 00:06:33,682 we're giving fly fishing a second chance. 164 00:06:33,782 --> 00:06:36,451 But wait a second. Where's the dang river? 165 00:06:36,551 --> 00:06:38,620 We're still 10 miles away. 166 00:06:38,720 --> 00:06:41,422 Oh, yes, yes, that -- that's why we can't see the river... 167 00:06:41,523 --> 00:06:43,257 that is still there. 168 00:06:45,093 --> 00:06:46,528 Where's the dang river? 169 00:06:46,628 --> 00:06:47,696 It's been dammed! 170 00:06:47,796 --> 00:06:49,698 Yeah. But by whom? 171 00:06:49,798 --> 00:06:53,267 Guess we have no choice but to check out the dam up yonder. 172 00:06:54,669 --> 00:06:56,871 But who needs answers when you've got... 173 00:06:58,439 --> 00:07:01,142 ...cannonb-a-a-alls?! 174 00:07:01,242 --> 00:07:03,344 What are you still doing in the car? 175 00:07:03,444 --> 00:07:06,380 Jump in, Francine! Feel the muck on your balls! 176 00:07:06,481 --> 00:07:08,650 FRANCINE: You know I don't have balls, Stan! 177 00:07:08,750 --> 00:07:10,051 Prove it! 178 00:07:12,186 --> 00:07:14,989 (banjo music playing) 179 00:07:15,089 --> 00:07:17,492 I know you're disappointed we can't fly fish, 180 00:07:17,592 --> 00:07:18,960 but like Cleonard says, 181 00:07:19,060 --> 00:07:21,630 when God dams a river, he makes a lake. 182 00:07:21,730 --> 00:07:22,864 Who's Cleonard? 183 00:07:22,964 --> 00:07:25,534 That guy over there I just met for the first time. 184 00:07:25,634 --> 00:07:26,801 So, what do you think? 185 00:07:26,901 --> 00:07:29,170 Lake life? Our new couples' thing? 186 00:07:29,270 --> 00:07:30,672 What's lake life? 187 00:07:30,772 --> 00:07:32,073 You know, swimmin', drinkin', 188 00:07:32,173 --> 00:07:34,008 sun burnin', Lyme disease gettin' -- 189 00:07:34,108 --> 00:07:35,043 lake life! 190 00:07:35,143 --> 00:07:38,246 I'm sorry. I'm just bummed about the river. 191 00:07:38,346 --> 00:07:39,380 Oh, come on. 192 00:07:39,480 --> 00:07:41,716 What was your favorite thing about fly fishing? 193 00:07:41,816 --> 00:07:43,918 Well, it was something I really enjoyed 194 00:07:44,018 --> 00:07:45,987 and was really good at. 195 00:07:46,087 --> 00:07:47,922 -(imitates buzzer) You liked...the water! 196 00:07:48,022 --> 00:07:49,157 Well, think about it. 197 00:07:49,257 --> 00:07:51,726 Now you have all that water in one spot. 198 00:07:51,826 --> 00:07:53,027 If you see a patch you like, 199 00:07:53,127 --> 00:07:54,829 you don't have to worry about it rushing by. 200 00:07:54,929 --> 00:07:56,598 It's gonna be there for centuries. 201 00:07:56,698 --> 00:07:58,900 -(flatly) I guess. -That's the spirit! 202 00:07:59,000 --> 00:08:00,935 Look at Cleonard, screamin' at his mom 203 00:08:01,035 --> 00:08:03,204 in front of everyone -- what a baller. 204 00:08:03,304 --> 00:08:05,840 You gotta meet him. 205 00:08:05,940 --> 00:08:08,342 Hey, Cleonard. This is Francine. 206 00:08:08,442 --> 00:08:11,680 Ma'am. Let me introduce y'all to the gang. 207 00:08:11,780 --> 00:08:13,682 This here's Cleonard Jr. 208 00:08:13,782 --> 00:08:15,449 That's Mama, Big Clen, 209 00:08:15,550 --> 00:08:17,518 Tammy, Tammy's man, 210 00:08:17,619 --> 00:08:22,290 Guts, and the lovely Cleonard-Dawn. 211 00:08:22,390 --> 00:08:24,959 Say, we're just about to go bob for pigs' feet. 212 00:08:25,059 --> 00:08:26,360 Y'all interested? 213 00:08:26,460 --> 00:08:28,029 Oh, hell yes! 214 00:08:28,129 --> 00:08:30,064 Oh, I'm good. 215 00:08:30,164 --> 00:08:33,034 I had two monkey hands and a zebra dick for lunch. 216 00:08:33,134 --> 00:08:35,203 Come on! Lake life! 217 00:08:35,303 --> 00:08:37,305 (sighing) Okay. I guess you were gonna 218 00:08:37,405 --> 00:08:39,107 give fly fishing a second chance. 219 00:08:39,207 --> 00:08:41,309 That's right. Remember how surprised I was 220 00:08:41,409 --> 00:08:42,744 the river was gone? 221 00:08:42,844 --> 00:08:43,745 Twice. 222 00:08:43,845 --> 00:08:45,213 On my count! 223 00:08:46,280 --> 00:08:48,249 One! 224 00:08:48,349 --> 00:08:49,550 Go! 225 00:08:49,651 --> 00:08:51,653 ** 226 00:08:51,753 --> 00:08:53,888 (laughs, gurgles) 227 00:08:53,988 --> 00:08:55,423 -Unh! -(crunch) 228 00:08:55,523 --> 00:08:57,058 (crunch) 229 00:08:57,158 --> 00:08:59,160 Mnh! 230 00:08:59,260 --> 00:09:00,629 (laughs, gurgles) 231 00:09:00,729 --> 00:09:01,896 ** 232 00:09:01,996 --> 00:09:03,097 (retches) 233 00:09:03,197 --> 00:09:06,000 (distorted vomiting) 234 00:09:06,100 --> 00:09:13,107 ** 235 00:09:13,675 --> 00:09:14,609 (whistles) 236 00:09:14,709 --> 00:09:16,477 Pbth! I got seven! 237 00:09:16,577 --> 00:09:17,779 You win! 238 00:09:17,879 --> 00:09:21,783 Let's hear it for Lake Man and his wife, Vomit! 239 00:09:21,883 --> 00:09:23,451 -(cheers and applause) -(gasps) You got a nickname! 240 00:09:23,551 --> 00:09:26,921 What a power couple. Lake Man and Vomit. 241 00:09:27,021 --> 00:09:28,422 ** 242 00:09:28,522 --> 00:09:32,293 Grape, grape, grape. 243 00:09:32,393 --> 00:09:33,828 Yum. 244 00:09:33,928 --> 00:09:35,697 Rogu, stop fussing with those olives. 245 00:09:35,797 --> 00:09:38,299 Steve and Hayley found the name "Omar" written on the door, 246 00:09:38,399 --> 00:09:40,802 and I have to get something off my chest. 247 00:09:40,902 --> 00:09:42,536 You're the only one I can tell. 248 00:09:42,637 --> 00:09:45,373 Omar is my son. 249 00:09:45,473 --> 00:09:47,275 Oh, my God! 250 00:09:47,375 --> 00:09:50,478 Or at least I've come to think of him as my son. 251 00:09:51,713 --> 00:09:55,717 Rogu need more information. 252 00:09:55,817 --> 00:09:57,852 A long time ago, I saw a boy 253 00:09:57,952 --> 00:09:59,487 in a Country Time Lemonade commercial, 254 00:09:59,587 --> 00:10:03,224 and since then, I imagined that he was mine. 255 00:10:03,324 --> 00:10:06,360 I guess that's the whole story. Huh. 256 00:10:06,460 --> 00:10:08,296 (gasps) Oh! And I've been guessing at his height 257 00:10:08,396 --> 00:10:09,530 and marking it on the door. 258 00:10:09,630 --> 00:10:10,965 Busted! 259 00:10:11,065 --> 00:10:13,134 We knew you had something to do with Omar! 260 00:10:13,234 --> 00:10:16,738 And we knew you'd come spillin' your guts to Rogu. 261 00:10:16,838 --> 00:10:18,306 Everyone does. 262 00:10:18,406 --> 00:10:20,709 You used Rogu as a honeypot?! 263 00:10:20,809 --> 00:10:23,745 You got Rogu'd. 264 00:10:23,845 --> 00:10:26,180 (laughter) 265 00:10:26,280 --> 00:10:28,817 (crying) 266 00:10:28,917 --> 00:10:30,551 Buddy, don't feel bad. 267 00:10:30,651 --> 00:10:33,855 It was just...kind of a game or something. I don't know. 268 00:10:33,955 --> 00:10:37,658 I'm so sad and alone... 269 00:10:37,759 --> 00:10:39,560 and sad. 270 00:10:39,660 --> 00:10:41,362 All right. Let's help him with this, 271 00:10:41,462 --> 00:10:43,264 and then we'll fix our nose and teeth. 272 00:10:44,899 --> 00:10:46,835 (engine hums) 273 00:10:46,935 --> 00:10:50,271 Whoo-hoo-hoo! That all you got, Junior?! 274 00:10:50,371 --> 00:10:52,373 -(engine revs) -Aah! Aah! Aah! 275 00:10:52,473 --> 00:10:53,541 STAN: Whoo! Whoo! 276 00:10:53,641 --> 00:10:55,744 (Francine grunting) 277 00:10:59,213 --> 00:11:00,882 How great is lake life? 278 00:11:00,982 --> 00:11:02,583 Let's fire it up again, Junior. 279 00:11:02,683 --> 00:11:05,954 I think I might sit this one out, swim to shore. 280 00:11:06,054 --> 00:11:10,091 Swim in? Sounds like we got ourselves a lake-aholic, Junior. 281 00:11:10,191 --> 00:11:11,625 I'm a lake-aholic, too, 282 00:11:11,726 --> 00:11:15,363 except with alcohol and meth and unprotected sex! 283 00:11:15,463 --> 00:11:17,231 I'm gonna beat it, though, 'cause I ordered 284 00:11:17,331 --> 00:11:20,068 a fidget spinner, and it's on its way. 285 00:11:20,168 --> 00:11:24,538 ** 286 00:11:24,638 --> 00:11:25,807 Hey, Roger. 287 00:11:25,907 --> 00:11:27,441 Turns out my grill's a little small. 288 00:11:27,541 --> 00:11:29,744 We're running about six to seven hours behind. 289 00:11:29,844 --> 00:11:32,981 Who ordered a grilled cheese at 11:00 a.m.?! 290 00:11:33,081 --> 00:11:36,584 Yours now if you want it. 291 00:11:36,684 --> 00:11:39,487 (indistinct conversations) 292 00:11:39,587 --> 00:11:42,223 Yoink! Lake life is awesome! 293 00:11:42,323 --> 00:11:44,292 Cleonard shot an osprey with a crossbow, 294 00:11:44,392 --> 00:11:46,795 and we're gonna bang it open with a rock! 295 00:11:46,895 --> 00:11:48,562 Cleonard, from the lake. 296 00:11:48,662 --> 00:11:52,466 Stan, it's been a long day. When can we go home? 297 00:11:52,566 --> 00:11:55,269 Not yet! Cleonard shot an osprey with a crossbow, 298 00:11:55,369 --> 00:11:57,906 and we're gonna bang it open with a rock! 299 00:11:59,173 --> 00:12:00,842 FRANCINE: Ding! 300 00:12:03,011 --> 00:12:05,246 Hey, Roger, I'm borrowing this. 301 00:12:05,346 --> 00:12:07,248 Sorry. I just wanted to check on my turkey burger. 302 00:12:07,348 --> 00:12:09,483 This isn't McDonald's, sir! Check back in the morning! 303 00:12:09,583 --> 00:12:10,684 (tongs clack) 304 00:12:10,785 --> 00:12:13,187 ** 305 00:12:13,287 --> 00:12:15,256 It's like... why am I tracking the height 306 00:12:15,356 --> 00:12:18,526 of a boy I've only seen in commercials? 307 00:12:18,626 --> 00:12:21,762 I think television is extremely dangerous for me. 308 00:12:21,863 --> 00:12:23,531 It makes me feel like I know him. 309 00:12:23,631 --> 00:12:25,633 But maybe you can know him, Klaus. 310 00:12:25,733 --> 00:12:26,634 What? 311 00:12:26,734 --> 00:12:28,636 Omar is real. 312 00:12:28,736 --> 00:12:31,205 He's real and he's alive and he's out there. 313 00:12:31,305 --> 00:12:34,375 We found him on Cameo, and he's actually available 314 00:12:34,475 --> 00:12:36,544 to make personal appearances for an extra fee. 315 00:12:36,644 --> 00:12:37,946 You know I have no money! 316 00:12:38,046 --> 00:12:40,314 I'll cover it. I got a little cabbage 317 00:12:40,414 --> 00:12:42,383 comin' from the tooth fairy. 318 00:12:42,483 --> 00:12:44,886 Look, you have a lot of real love for him, 319 00:12:44,986 --> 00:12:47,121 a-and maybe that's something he's looking for. 320 00:12:47,221 --> 00:12:48,789 Y-You might not be able to be his dad, 321 00:12:48,890 --> 00:12:52,193 but you could be, I dunno, a-a mentor. 322 00:12:52,293 --> 00:12:53,995 Or he could mentor you? 323 00:12:54,095 --> 00:12:57,665 Or maybe just get in a room and see who mentors who. 324 00:12:57,765 --> 00:13:00,068 Okay. Let's reach out to him. 325 00:13:00,168 --> 00:13:02,336 I'm gonna go to my alcove and get all my farts out 326 00:13:02,436 --> 00:13:03,804 before he comes. 327 00:13:03,905 --> 00:13:07,308 I suggest you all do the same. 328 00:13:07,408 --> 00:13:10,544 Maybe this dumb lake's good for something. 329 00:13:10,644 --> 00:13:14,182 Ow. Is that my ass or the dam? 330 00:13:17,251 --> 00:13:20,821 (laughs) That's a funny bit. 331 00:13:20,922 --> 00:13:23,858 Stan always does that bit. 332 00:13:23,958 --> 00:13:26,027 Stan always does that bit! 333 00:13:26,127 --> 00:13:29,163 That little bitch built a secret dam! 334 00:13:29,263 --> 00:13:31,499 ** 335 00:13:31,599 --> 00:13:34,102 Stan, come with me! We need to talk! 336 00:13:34,202 --> 00:13:35,536 Just tell me in front of Cleonard. 337 00:13:35,636 --> 00:13:37,371 I'm gonna tell him the second you leave, anyway. 338 00:13:37,471 --> 00:13:38,739 I tell Cleonard everything. 339 00:13:38,839 --> 00:13:41,709 Fine. I know you built the dam! 340 00:13:41,809 --> 00:13:44,745 Ooh! Sounds like somebody's getting laid tonight. 341 00:13:44,845 --> 00:13:45,914 (gulping) 342 00:13:46,014 --> 00:13:47,281 (suspenseful chord strikes) 343 00:13:47,381 --> 00:13:49,683 Honey, we -- we don't need to go in there. 344 00:13:49,783 --> 00:13:53,021 You dammed a river because you didn't want 345 00:13:53,121 --> 00:13:55,689 to give fly fishing a second chance! 346 00:13:56,857 --> 00:13:58,927 FRANCINE: Damn your dam. 347 00:13:59,027 --> 00:14:01,395 (rocket whooshes) 348 00:14:04,065 --> 00:14:06,700 (crumbling) 349 00:14:08,102 --> 00:14:09,270 (water splashes) 350 00:14:09,370 --> 00:14:11,272 See ya, turds! 351 00:14:11,372 --> 00:14:14,875 Hey, Stan, tell Roger to have my chicken tenders 352 00:14:14,976 --> 00:14:18,046 delivered to my balls! 353 00:14:18,146 --> 00:14:21,315 (up-tempo banjo music plays) 354 00:14:21,415 --> 00:14:23,417 ** 355 00:14:23,517 --> 00:14:26,254 That lady ruined our lake! 356 00:14:26,354 --> 00:14:28,889 She's deeeeaaad! 357 00:14:28,990 --> 00:14:30,724 (indistinct shouting and hollering) 358 00:14:30,824 --> 00:14:33,827 Cleonard, my man, the lake was only here for a day. 359 00:14:33,928 --> 00:14:35,563 You don't need to do anything crazy. 360 00:14:35,663 --> 00:14:39,433 Of course we do, Stan. We're crazy lake people. 361 00:14:39,533 --> 00:14:40,935 Let's git 'er! 362 00:14:41,035 --> 00:14:44,172 (indistinct shouting) 363 00:14:44,272 --> 00:14:45,940 I got a crush on you, Stan. 364 00:14:47,075 --> 00:14:49,910 (engine revs, women giggle) 365 00:14:50,011 --> 00:14:52,013 Oh, my God! 366 00:14:52,113 --> 00:14:54,415 Tammy's crushing on me?! 367 00:14:56,517 --> 00:14:58,953 ** 368 00:14:59,053 --> 00:15:00,955 The hillbillies want to kill Francine 369 00:15:01,055 --> 00:15:02,490 because she destroyed the lake! 370 00:15:02,590 --> 00:15:04,525 Oh, thank God this is over. 371 00:15:04,625 --> 00:15:06,794 I was playing it cool, but I was in over my head. 372 00:15:06,894 --> 00:15:08,529 Come on. We can still get a jump on them. 373 00:15:08,629 --> 00:15:09,998 Cleonard can't find his Croakies, 374 00:15:10,098 --> 00:15:11,132 so they haven't left yet. 375 00:15:11,232 --> 00:15:13,367 Okay. Just let me grab my stuff. 376 00:15:13,467 --> 00:15:15,636 Did you really need all this junk? 377 00:15:15,736 --> 00:15:17,038 You caught me after my Costco run. 378 00:15:17,138 --> 00:15:18,806 What am I supposed to do, just leave behind 379 00:15:18,906 --> 00:15:21,542 a 13-pound bag of pitted dates? 380 00:15:21,642 --> 00:15:22,977 -No. -Hey, can you guide 381 00:15:23,077 --> 00:15:25,546 that jumbo hand sanitizer this way? 382 00:15:25,646 --> 00:15:27,948 Had my hand up a possum's butt all morning. 383 00:15:28,049 --> 00:15:30,518 You know what they say -- customer's always right. 384 00:15:30,618 --> 00:15:31,719 I was the customer. 385 00:15:31,819 --> 00:15:33,454 CLEONARD: Hey, Lake Man! 386 00:15:33,554 --> 00:15:35,789 Any sign of Vomit yet?! 387 00:15:35,889 --> 00:15:38,859 I told you, Cleonard! I won't help you hunt my wife! 388 00:15:38,959 --> 00:15:40,494 Oh, yeah. 389 00:15:40,594 --> 00:15:42,630 Well, can you at least ask the grill guy 390 00:15:42,730 --> 00:15:45,399 if he has any ice-cream sandwiches? 391 00:15:47,568 --> 00:15:48,536 He does. 392 00:15:48,636 --> 00:15:49,837 Okay, great! 393 00:15:49,937 --> 00:15:52,906 Ask him if he takes wet checks! 394 00:15:53,707 --> 00:15:55,476 CLEONARD: He does! 395 00:15:55,576 --> 00:15:57,978 ** 396 00:15:58,079 --> 00:16:01,382 Okay. Three pitchers of Country Time Lemonade. 397 00:16:01,482 --> 00:16:04,085 That should be enough to get us through the first hour. 398 00:16:04,185 --> 00:16:05,753 I hope it's still his favorite. 399 00:16:05,853 --> 00:16:07,055 (knocking) 400 00:16:09,323 --> 00:16:12,093 Hi. I'm Omar from the Country Time Lemonade commercial. 401 00:16:12,193 --> 00:16:13,361 We know. 402 00:16:13,461 --> 00:16:16,064 I was also in Tremors 5: Bloodlines. 403 00:16:16,164 --> 00:16:18,066 Please, come in. 404 00:16:20,701 --> 00:16:22,770 This is Klaus. 405 00:16:22,870 --> 00:16:25,506 He only knows you from your lemonade commercials. 406 00:16:27,175 --> 00:16:29,743 It's not easy to explain or even understand, 407 00:16:29,843 --> 00:16:32,846 but something about you appealed to Klaus, 408 00:16:32,946 --> 00:16:35,083 and he started to think of you as a son. 409 00:16:35,183 --> 00:16:38,119 He has a lot of love for you, and I think he's here today to 410 00:16:38,219 --> 00:16:41,855 ask if that would be something you're open to sharing. 411 00:16:43,591 --> 00:16:46,026 Wow. That's a pretty strange offer. 412 00:16:46,127 --> 00:16:49,930 But, honestly, I'd be really open to this. 413 00:16:50,030 --> 00:16:53,867 I'm lonely. And maybe you are, too. 414 00:16:53,967 --> 00:16:56,637 And maybe, together, we won't have to be. 415 00:16:56,737 --> 00:16:59,107 -How tall are you?! -I'm sorry? 416 00:16:59,207 --> 00:17:01,975 How tall are you?! Omar! 417 00:17:02,076 --> 00:17:03,411 I'm 5'7"? 418 00:17:03,511 --> 00:17:05,246 That's not right! 419 00:17:06,647 --> 00:17:07,981 Klaus, what are you doing? 420 00:17:08,082 --> 00:17:10,451 Get against the door! We'll see who's right! 421 00:17:10,551 --> 00:17:12,920 -There's the plunger! Can I -- -I'm using it on Omar! 422 00:17:13,020 --> 00:17:15,756 -I actually have to go. -Are you insane?! 423 00:17:15,856 --> 00:17:17,491 I have to measure you! 424 00:17:17,591 --> 00:17:18,592 (door slams) 425 00:17:18,692 --> 00:17:20,561 Did he just run out of the house? 426 00:17:20,661 --> 00:17:22,796 What a Hollyweirdo. 427 00:17:22,896 --> 00:17:24,598 It's a real lesson. 428 00:17:24,698 --> 00:17:27,301 Don't meet your Hollyweird heroes. 429 00:17:27,401 --> 00:17:28,502 (water trickling) 430 00:17:28,602 --> 00:17:31,305 And here comes the toilet water. 431 00:17:31,405 --> 00:17:33,841 Keep your eyes peeled. Francine's probably close. 432 00:17:33,941 --> 00:17:35,743 This is right around where she took us fishing. 433 00:17:35,843 --> 00:17:40,281 Hey, Stan, I double-dog dare you to murder your wife! 434 00:17:40,381 --> 00:17:41,849 Man, this has been going on for hours. 435 00:17:41,949 --> 00:17:44,285 We gotta lose these guys. Cut your tubes loose. 436 00:17:44,385 --> 00:17:46,487 Maybe they'll trip them up. -Not my tubes! 437 00:17:46,587 --> 00:17:48,589 Well, there must be another way, Stan! 438 00:17:48,689 --> 00:17:50,791 Oh! Maybe we can creatively harness 439 00:17:50,891 --> 00:17:52,760 the untapped power of the trees. 440 00:17:52,860 --> 00:17:54,295 Francine's life is at stake! 441 00:17:54,395 --> 00:17:58,632 Ugh. Fiiine. You're so obsessed with her. 442 00:18:01,935 --> 00:18:05,005 My tree idea is lookin' pretty good right now. 443 00:18:05,873 --> 00:18:07,308 The river cuts back. 444 00:18:07,408 --> 00:18:09,710 Hey, what if we jump out, run across the land, 445 00:18:09,810 --> 00:18:11,212 then get back in on the other side? 446 00:18:11,312 --> 00:18:12,980 It'll be much faster than taking 447 00:18:13,080 --> 00:18:15,216 this lazy-ass river all the way around. 448 00:18:15,316 --> 00:18:18,219 STAN: That's...a great idea. 449 00:18:20,053 --> 00:18:22,022 What a shortcut! Top-notch idea! 450 00:18:22,122 --> 00:18:25,125 ROGER: I'm loving the positive reinforcement, Stan! 451 00:18:27,195 --> 00:18:30,531 (owl hooting) 452 00:18:30,631 --> 00:18:32,900 Whoa! Check out the beautiful owl! 453 00:18:33,000 --> 00:18:34,502 Aah! 454 00:18:34,602 --> 00:18:37,505 It must've smelled possum butt on my knuckles! 455 00:18:37,605 --> 00:18:38,972 Oh, well. Bye! 456 00:18:39,072 --> 00:18:40,374 (water rushing) 457 00:18:40,474 --> 00:18:42,376 (ominous music plays) 458 00:18:42,476 --> 00:18:45,379 Aah! Oh! Aah! Ah! 459 00:18:45,479 --> 00:18:47,381 (grunting) 460 00:18:47,481 --> 00:18:48,582 Aaaah! 461 00:18:48,682 --> 00:18:50,484 ** 462 00:18:50,584 --> 00:18:52,520 Ah... 463 00:18:52,620 --> 00:18:57,157 ** 464 00:18:59,760 --> 00:19:02,196 (coughing) 465 00:19:02,296 --> 00:19:05,233 Francine! Can you stop fly fishing for one second 466 00:19:05,333 --> 00:19:07,167 and listen to me? We gotta run! 467 00:19:07,268 --> 00:19:08,869 The hillbillies are trying to hunt you down! 468 00:19:08,969 --> 00:19:10,504 Why should I believe you? 469 00:19:10,604 --> 00:19:13,741 Everything you do is for selfish reasons. 470 00:19:13,841 --> 00:19:14,775 Name one time. 471 00:19:14,875 --> 00:19:17,445 You built a dam so I couldn't fish! 472 00:19:17,545 --> 00:19:19,780 Oh, well, you knocked that one out of the park. 473 00:19:19,880 --> 00:19:21,249 How long you been sittin' on that? 474 00:19:21,349 --> 00:19:22,516 CLEONARD: There she is! 475 00:19:22,616 --> 00:19:24,218 (banjo music plays) 476 00:19:24,318 --> 00:19:27,187 I got this. Go hide while I save our lives. 477 00:19:28,121 --> 00:19:31,091 Cleonard, you've made me the happiest man on Earth. 478 00:19:31,191 --> 00:19:33,894 But I'm going to have to ask you not to kill my wife. 479 00:19:33,927 --> 00:19:35,629 -(bow clicks) -(whoosh) 480 00:19:35,729 --> 00:19:39,567 Stan, it's time for you to finally let me 481 00:19:39,667 --> 00:19:41,535 do something I'm good at. 482 00:19:41,635 --> 00:19:43,203 Go hide! 483 00:19:43,304 --> 00:19:45,072 ** 484 00:19:45,172 --> 00:19:46,106 (weapons cock) 485 00:19:46,206 --> 00:19:48,609 (whooshing) 486 00:19:48,709 --> 00:19:51,545 ** 487 00:19:51,645 --> 00:19:54,282 (knife scrapes) 488 00:19:54,382 --> 00:19:57,751 -(pop) -My eye! My eye! 489 00:19:57,851 --> 00:20:00,053 Wait! That was my lazy eye! 490 00:20:00,153 --> 00:20:01,622 My good eye's still good! 491 00:20:01,722 --> 00:20:03,123 -(whip, pop) -Aah! 492 00:20:03,223 --> 00:20:05,459 I'm almost out of eyes! 493 00:20:05,559 --> 00:20:07,761 Don't take my Pan's Labyrint eyes! 494 00:20:07,861 --> 00:20:09,897 (whip, pop, whip, pop) 495 00:20:09,997 --> 00:20:11,899 (screaming) 496 00:20:11,999 --> 00:20:13,934 Unh! (screams) 497 00:20:14,034 --> 00:20:15,569 Who else wants some?! 498 00:20:22,109 --> 00:20:24,645 Wow! That was incredible, Francine! 499 00:20:24,745 --> 00:20:25,979 Told you I was good. 500 00:20:26,079 --> 00:20:27,581 I'm sorry I dammed your river 501 00:20:27,681 --> 00:20:29,783 just because I'm bad at fly fishing. 502 00:20:29,883 --> 00:20:31,585 But now I realize -- 503 00:20:31,685 --> 00:20:33,020 Aaaaaaaaaaaaah! 504 00:20:33,120 --> 00:20:34,855 Oh, my God! Roger! 505 00:20:34,955 --> 00:20:37,458 I'll be fine. Nothing a little hand sanitizer 506 00:20:37,558 --> 00:20:40,361 and 32 cans of water chestnuts can't fix. 507 00:20:40,461 --> 00:20:42,996 I-I just gotta head upriver and find my supplies. 508 00:20:43,096 --> 00:20:44,932 (owl hoots) 509 00:20:45,032 --> 00:20:47,267 Let's get out of here. 510 00:20:50,103 --> 00:20:53,841 Where are you?! Where are you?! 511 00:20:53,941 --> 00:20:56,644 -(thud) -There you are. 512 00:20:56,744 --> 00:20:57,845 (can tab pops) 513 00:20:57,945 --> 00:21:00,481 (gulps) Ahhh! 514 00:21:00,581 --> 00:21:02,149 (smacks lips) 515 00:21:02,249 --> 00:21:04,117 Bye! Have a great time! 516 00:21:06,219 --> 00:21:08,121 -- Captions by VITAC -- 35917

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