Original subtitles

It doesn't make sense.

I don't understand how something like this happened.

I don't know what I'm gonna do.

This has been my whole life, and now it's gone.

I don't know what I'm supposed to do.

Pendleton Industries is all I've ever known.

And now it's all been taken away.

When someone sees a weakness in me, I turn that weakness into a strength.

Danica, you're so strong.

I don't think I could do anything like this.

You can imagine changing your life...

by fighting for the deed to the land, Clarinda.

Which is only possible if Bartholomew is no longer living.

You will never get the deed to the land again.

I will never allow it.

Put down that gun, you silly girl.

Watch your step, Bartholomew.

Ridge is on his way.

And he's still in love with Clarinda.

And Jared loves me.

Clarinda...

it's true.

I'm here for you.

This is the story of Joy, as told by me, her grandmother.

Everybody starts out with some kind of dream of what life will be.

Joy's dream started at this metal garage her father ran.

Jackie, Jackie, bo-backie Banana-fana, fo-fackie

Fee-fi, mo-mackie Jackie

My granddaughter had a best friend, Jackie.

Joy, Joy, bo-boy Banana-fana, fo-foy

While shivering in my shoes

I strike a careless pose

A half-sister, Peggy.

A dog.

It's okay. It's okay, Mitzy.

A father.

A mother...

who is my daughter.

A grandmother. That's me.

She made many beautiful things in her room.

Magic.

Some people love to make things.

They have the patience and the focus to figure it out with their hands.

Joy was one of those people who rejoiced in making things.

And I open the gate to the big green meadow.

And I went into the forest.

And there, I conquered many dangers.

A wolf...

and other scary things.

And then I started to build my very own house...

where I would live...

and make wonderful creations for all the world...

to see and have.

And maybe for the prince and princess...

who lived across the forest, in the castle.

See?

And they were in love.

And maybe they'd invite me over...

because of the things that I made.

You need a handsome prince. That's what you need. A prince.

No, I don't need a prince.

This is a special power. I don't need a prince.

My daughter Terry is separated, and alone in her room...

watching soap operas.

You can imagine changing your life...

by fighting for the deed to the land, Clarinda.

I have something for you.

Oh, Danica...

You're so strong.

I don't think I could ever do something like this.

I always felt it was for me to encourage her.

So I said...

You are going to grow up and be a strong, smart young woman...

go to school, meet a fine young man, have beautiful children of your own...

and you're gonna build wonderful things that you do in your room.

Okay?

What happened to this girl's dreams?

Watch this.

Mother, I can't find my lanyard for work.

They're not gonna let me through airport security without it.

Joy, you can't find your lanyard? Can I help you?

No, but I...

Honey, listen.

I know life hasn't gone as we discussed many times, sweetheart.

And you don't exactly have your whole life ahead of you...

but you still have a good portion of it, anyway.

Hope springs eternal.

-Thanks, Mimi. -Sure.

Mother, look what I did find.

What is that?

How can you ask what this is?

The dog collar I invented in high school.

Remember Mitzy choked a couple of times?

So I invented a dog collar with a quick release...

so that a dog would never choke...

and I covered it with reflective tape, plus it's a flea collar.

I probably wouldn't be late to this job I'm going to...

if you'd gotten me a patent or a lawyer.

Joy the doer, Joy the doer. You were always doing things, honey.

How could I be expected to remember everything?

Now the Hartz company has the patent to that collar.

I don't know how to get a patent.

What is that smell?

How did you get yogurt down here, Mother?

I was wondering what that odor was.

It's starting to mold for Pete's sake.

Yes, I am, because I feel like I cannot have the life bled out of me this way.

Joy, look who's back. Look who's back!

Yes, Bartholomew is back.

No, no.

I thought Bartholomew was dead?

And I'm a ghost.

He came back as a ghost with even greater powers.

Ghost, you go away!

My powers are even greater now.

I cannot handle this. How is this possible?

Stay away from him.

Clarinda, you don't know what a ghost can do to you!

Even from beyond the grave.

Grandma's gonna take you to the birthday party, okay?

Five minutes.

Hi. What are you doing here?

I'm returning him to you. I don't want him anymore.

What?

He's damaged.

He has no place else to go.

He's been living in my house for two years.

Dad, I'm so sorry.

But you know, Tony's living in the basement.

Your ex-husband shouldn't be living in your basement.

That's not the proper way to be divorced.

Okay. I don't know where I'm gonna put you.

Dad, don't go in there. Mom's in there.

You can have him back, Terry. I don't want him anymore.

What was so much better about being with Sharon, Rudy?

Dad, don't answer that.

We went to the Metropolitan Museum ofArt.

-What did you like at the museum? -What did I like? I'll tell you what I like.

I like the ancient Roman statues. I like the medieval armor.

I like the Etruscan jewelry.

-Museums are full of dust and death. -I like going to the café...

having an espresso, a nice panini, that's what I like.

You had a panini in a coffin, Rudy.

-A dusty, boring coffin. Yuck. -Then why'd you ask me?

What are you, a crazy person?

It's like having a conversation with an insane asylum person.

What else, Captain Jack? What else was so great?

Captain Jack, you're calling me. Okay.

Yes, you're Captain Jack, the flying jackass.

Yeah, and you know what you are? You're like a gas leak.

-We don't smell you, we don't see you... -I am not a gas leak!

-but you're killing us all silently. -You take that back...

and tell me what else you did with Sharon!

You creature from the Black Lagoon.

No! This conversation is over.

-I'm leaving. Good luck. -Oh, my God. Here it goes.

Watch out, Joy. He's gonna snap!

Please. You want me to snap. That's your whole routine. You...

Guard the china!

-Hey, Terry, you like this? -Dad, no!

How's this for snapping?

-No! No. -How's this?

This is snapping!

-Dad! Stop! -He's disturbed, Joy!

He's a disturbed man!

-I'm disturbed? -He's a damaged man!

You're right, I am disturbed.

You're the great disturber!

I'm sorry, honey.

I don't like this.

You're not supposed to see this kind of thing.

I'm very, very sorry. I apologize sincerely.

lt's not gonna happen, okay? We have other...

I'm gonna clean all this up.

Dad, no. Don't clean it up.

Dad, stop. Just don't, okay?

Stop. I'll do it. I just want to get you out of this room.

Thank you.

Hi, guys. I'm sorry about all the yelling.

Mimi's gonna take you to the birthday party, okay?

Hi, my sweethearts.

-You broke things again. -He did break stuff.

I did break some things, but Grandma was wrong.

So I was a little wrong, but she was really wrong.

But Grandpa's gonna come stay with us for a little while.

Yay!

A sleepover with Grandpa! Yay!

Sharon never separated the wash. The whites were always gray.

But you have that magic touch, sweetheart, so could I give this to you, please?

Yeah, I'll take care of it, yeah. Just get your bag.

What about my ledgers and all that stuff? My accounting books?

I got them. I'll get them to you later today.

-I love you, Grandpa. -Love you.

-I did your taxes, I did your W-2s. -Okay. Very important.

You suck!

What is he doing here?

Sharon brought him back...

so he's gonna stay with us until he finds a new love or a new place to live.

You know how this goes.

Joy, I can't have your dad here.

What do you want me to do, Tony? I have to work.

I know, honey, but he's a nightmare, we'll kill each other. I can't.

I can't take any more of this. Period!

Dad, up.

We'll end up killing each other. I don't like this!

This is not the proper way to be divorced, the two of you.

You're gonna tell me how to be divorced?

I'm a provider, Tom Jones. I have my own business.

I help Joy with the mortgage. What do you do?

You sing all night at Angela Starpoli's club.

You get repeatedly fired from Campbell's Soup.

Okay, well I'm gonna divide the basement.

I'm divorced. I can do whatever I want, Rudy.

This is not the proper way to be divorced.

And I'm about to be late for work.

So please try not to fight in front of the children, okay?

Especially not physically.

Rudy, you see this? This microphone here?

You touch it, and I kill you.

Okay. I'm leaving.

Please try not to kill each other while I'm gone.

You've gone mad. This is all your fault!

Clarinda. Clarinda! Don't.

Clarinda, something terrible happened! Stay away from him!

Oh, my God. I thought I fixed this thing.

Nice job, Joy. Nice job.

Peggy? What are you doing here?

What's the matter with you? Sending Grandma Mimi with her arthritis...

to take them to their friend's birthday?

I'm fine.

They have a much better time with me anyway, with Aunt Peggy.

But I wasn't stupid enough to get into a bad marriage and have a couple of kids.

Don't bother your sister, Peggy.

I'm gonna talk to Dad about business. All right?

You gonna come bring the books by the garage later?

Yeah, I'm gonna bring them later. He's in the basement.

I'm joking with you.

Yeah. I know.

Kids, we're gonna do something fun later, okay?

We're doing something fun now.

Oh, we found your luggage but it's in Cleveland.

So now we just need to get it back to New York City.

I'm filing a complaint.

My husband needs his medication.

What's your name? Joy?

You don't seem joyous to me today.

Perhaps I am not so joyous today.

-Joy, I think you're getting demoted. -Hi, how you doing?

Listen, I need you to speak to the supervisor.

We're gonna be having some changes, and you're gonna be going to the night hours.

-Night hours? Tom, I can't work night hours. -And we're having cutbacks.

-I've got two kids. -Joy, I'm sorry.

Good luck.

Bye, Susan.

I'm not paying for metal that I haven't gotten.

On top of me send... You know, he wants to get paid.

He doesn't send an invoice, and he hasn't even sent the metal.

But why doesn't he just send the invoice? Send the invoice, I'll pay him.

Yep. That's it. Send the invoice.

Hi. Dad, I want to thank you again for helping with the mortgage.

Yeah.

I settled the accounts, balanced the books.

Thank you.

I'm sorry business is so bad, Dad.

I don't think that that crazy gun range is helping.

How is that still legal?

-What can I do? -After all these years?

They keep to themselves.

It's their property. The police leave them alone.

Why? You think it's costing us business?

I don't think it's helping.

Well, if you wanna help, why don't you come here and manage this place?

You know, I'd like to go the next level. Put on a nice suit.

You know, go out there and get some accounts.

Yeah, this is 9873. Just checking my mailbox.

What is that?

Yeah, I have a pen. What is it?

13-14. That's it?

Thank you.

What was that?

It's a 900 number.

What's a 900 number?

It's, you know, a dating service for widows and widowers.

Dating service?

You're not a widow or a widower.

What's the difference? I'm single.

I meet nice ladies. Maybe we fall in love.

I have to fall in love or I'm not interested. You know me.

I know, Dad.

Sharon was no good for him. It's nice for him to meet somebody new.

-I got him some new clothes, you know? -Okay. Okay.

-Hello? Is this 7633? -It's good., THEN JOY TO PEGGY

-Okay. I love you. See you later. -Yes?

Bye.

Hi. This is 9833.

Hi! Hi, how are you?

What a nice voice you have.

Thank you.

-Oh, an accent. -Yes.

I am from Italy.

Oh! Continental.

What is your name?

My name is Rudy, what's yours?

Trudy.

-Are you kidding me? -No.

Your name is Trudy?

Yes!

Rudy and Trudy. I love it.

Let's figure out when we're gonna meet.

That's a good idea. Let's have dinner.

-I could come pick you up. -Yeah.

I have a green Mercedes.

Okay, 6:30? I'll be ready.

Ciao.

Good luck with your date, Dad.

Thank you. I'm excited.

What do you think you're gonna wear?

Polo by Ralph Lauren.

Did you have to use the whole bottle of cologne?

Tony!

You smell like my grandmother. He smells like my grandmother.

Hey, please. Don't make me tense.

Don't stress me out. I gotta stay nice and loose.

-Now you're tense? -I'm tense. You're making me tense.

-Guys, stop. Please. -I'm making you tense?

My carriage awaits.

Have a great date.

Wish me luck.

You don't need it.

Joy, water!

Where are my cufflinks?

Mommy, come read to me!

Five minutes, Cristy.

Mother, again?

Yeah, you just sit right there. Are you comfortable?

How many times do I have to tell you not to clean your brushes out in the sink!

Danica thinks it's unladylike to toss things in the toilet.

And I happen to agree.

Yeah? Well, why don't you have Danica do your plumbing then?

Danica can direct her power anywhere Danica chooses.

That is the power of Danica.

Oh, my God.

If this problem gets any worse...

we're gonna have to move you into a different room.

That means no TV.

That could be very scary for you.

Don't let that happen, Joy. This is my comfort nest.

We're gonna need to get a plumber in here.

What?

There's gonna... A man in my room?

Well, I don't know any female plumbers other than me.

Well, can't you fix it, Joy?

This has surpassed my capabilities.

Thanks, Joy.

"The cicada is a large flying insect two to three inches long.

"It makes a sound of up to 120 decibels, louder than some telephones.

"It lives half of its life above ground evading predators.

This is the book you wanted me to read to you, Cristy?

How did this book even get in the house?

Aunt Peggy got it for me.

She said the reason I like cicadas is because they fill the air with sound...

which makes the house less lonelier for me.

Aunt Peggy tells you how you feel about the house being lonely?

Aunt Peggy tells me a lot of things.

Keep reading, please.

I don't want you listening to Aunt Peggy too much.

Okay. Why?

"The cicada, a symbol of rebirth in many countries...

"digs into the ground and stays buried for up to 17 years."

That's such a random number. Why 17 years?

It doesn't even say why.

I understand the four seasons in a year...

but why would something stay hidden for 17 years?

That's just unsettling. I'm not reading this.

You're sleepy anyway. We gotta go to bed.

I wanna sleep with Nana.

No, you should sleep upstairs in your room.

I want Nana.

All right. Well, watch out. There's a hole here.

Just going to lay down for a second.

I feel like I'm in a prison.

No, Bartholomew's the ex-con in the story.

And Clarinda doesn't even know about it.

But Danica's onto him.

They all blame Clarinda but Danica's gonna get to the bottom of it.

No. No.

Yes. It was you Clarinda.

I will get to the bottom of this.

You've made terrible mistakes.

It was Clarinda!

Oh.

Look who's here.

Look who's here.

Look who's here.

We are here today to remember what was lost...

seventeen years ago.

Do you remember?

Peggy comes with me.

Joy spends half the time with us.

We'll take her paper forest.

That's Joy's special thing, and it belongs in this house.

No, I...

Joy.

Joy, wake up!

Someone's been ringing the doorbell.

Jackie!

Oh, thank God! It's you.

What happened? I'm worried about you. I don't see you any more.

You don't come to the PTA.

You know how my mom's always clogging the sink with her hair from the brushes?

With the pipes in her room?

Yeah. She did it again.

Again?

Yes, and I had to bash open a hole in the floor.

There's a huge hole in the floor of my mother's room and I'm broke.

My father works hard. He's had some bad breaks.

I hope he gets another girlfriend, and he'll move out of the basement.

He's in the basement with Tony?

Yes. And they hate each other.

Yes.

It's a disaster. They won't stop fighting.

I don't know.

But how are you? How's the family? How is everybody?

Everybody's okay.

How's work?

My job, I could take it or leave it.

What happened to us, Jackie?

All the things that we used to dream about.

I feel like they just keep getting farther and farther away.

Remember the night of the party where everything started?

The band was playing.

Everything was so exciting.

Joy, you came!

I'm so glad you came! This is my boyfriend, Andre.

-Hi, Andre. -Nice to meet you.

Andre, this is my childhood friend, Joy.

Come inside!

-Wow. -Check my music class, accountant girl.

This is a class?

Yes!

Don't turn on the lights 'cause I don't wanna see

Mama told me not to come

-They're so good! -They are! The teacher's band.

Mama told me not to come

Mama told me not to come

She said, "That ain't the way to have fun, son"

"That ain't the way to have fun"

Mama told me not to come

Mama told me not to come

-Who's the bald guy? -That's our music teacher.

And he has all this... This is his house?

-Yeah, this is his house. -Wow.

He's from Venezuela.

-Who is that guy? -Yeah.

That's the music teacher's son.

Oh, my gosh.

You're dancing. Here you go.

What am I doing now?

-You're dancing. -No.

-Let me show you my father's house. -What?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'm gonna be a singer.

Really?

Yeah. I'm gonna be the next Tom Jones.

That's a big ambition. There's only one Tom Jones.

I know, but you can't let the practical get you down.

You gotta keep going to what you love.

That's true.

That's what my father taught me.

What about you?

I invented a dog collar that I want to get patented, but I don't think it ever will.

I was valedictorian in high school.

I got into a college in Boston...

but I'm staying here because my parents are getting divorced...

and I'm staying to help my mom.

And I help my dad with business stuff. Accountant.

Maybe your dreams are on hold right now.

No?

That's a nice way of putting it.

This song is going to be in the town musical.

We should sing it together.

I know I stand in line Until you think you have the time

To spend an evening with me

That's really nice.

Okay, go.

-No. -Okay.

And if we go someplace to dance

I know that there's a chance You won't be leaving with me

He gave my girl a spring in her step, just when she needed it.

What are we doing? Tony.

He got her to do the musical, something she never would have done.

I know I stand in line Until you think you have the time

To spend an evening with me

And if we go someplace to dance I know that there's a chance

You won't be leaving with me

And afterwards we drop into a quiet little place And have a drink or two

And then I go and spoil it all By saying something stupid like "I love you"

I can see it in your eyes That you despise the same old lies

You heard the night before

You're so smart, you're so beautiful, I... I just...

You could have married anybody.

You could have married a doctor, a lawyer, a nice man instead of this...

I don't even know what to call this guy.

Are you seriously talking about this right now?

It's still not too late.

Dad.

Let's go.

Think about it.

Dad!

We are a loving family, a solid family.

I've been married to my wife...

Now I have a speech.

He wasn't finished, Dad.

He's finished now.

I had two failed marriages.

The daughter from my first marriage, Peggy...

has a lot of tension with the daughter from my second marriage, Joy.

I was married to Joy's mother for 18 miserable fucking years.

Dad! That's just mean! Sit down!

But I got out of all that.

And I finally met the light of my life, Sharon.

-To you, baby. -Dad!

You're my guy.

I toast you.

Dad! Stop!

-Will you stop it? -Rudolph, please! Enough.

-Are you happy now? -Fairly happy, yes.

Look what I found.

The divorce glass.

Salud.

I give these kids 50-50 odds.

Salud, everybody. Have a good time.

Tony, wake up!

Please! Cristy hasn't eaten, Tommy needs to be changed.

Oh, Cristy. What are you doing?

-Get up. I just told your boss you're going to work! -But what did you lie for?

-Because you're gonna lose anotherjob! -No, honey, I'm sick!

You're not sick, you're hungover!

That's not who I am! I'm a singer, that's what I do!

You're not making any money singing!

Get in your car right now and go get yourjob!

You're trying to turn me into someone I'm not!

I can't do this! I can't do this, Tony!

I am losing my mind!

I don't wanna end up like my family.

Time moves forward.

Time moves backwards.

Time stands still.

Do I live up to my profile or do I fall short?

Are you kidding? You're a banana flambé with extra rum.

You're a trip to the moon on gossamer wings.

Wow! You're so poetic and romantic.

It's true!

Just like my late Morris.

Morris. Now, he was American and you're Italian, and your name originated how?

My name. My Italian name is Geltrude.

Geltrude.

And then he called me "Trude," and then became more American. "Trudy."

Trudy.

Why don't you come with your entire family, on my late Morris' boat?

Bring the children, bring the grandchildren.

Like a motorboat?

No, no, it's a sailboat. 55 feet.

-Wow. That's big. That is big. -Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, I would love to.

We'd bring some nice food, something to drink, that would be great.

Yeah, but not red wine, because it might stain the teakwood deck.

It's very precious.

Okay, understood. No red wine.

I got the red wine!

No, no, no, I'm sorry, you can't have red wine on the boat.

No red wine, Tony. No red wine.

Why? It's a beautiful wine!

What's Tom Jones doing here anyway? Who invited him?

He's here to help me with the kids.

I brought Peggy to help.

Peggy says mean things about me to my children, so...

I say nice things about you, too.

It's a beautiful wine.

You have an accent, too!

Yes.

Where are you from, paesano?

Paesano? Don't encourage him, please.

I'm from Venezuela, darling.

Do you know this song?

I can see why she still loves him!

Come on. Come on board.

-This is gonna be a disaster. -Dad.

Welcome everyone.

Cheers!

I dressed for boating but I didn't realize how cold it was gonna be.

My late husband Morris, I met him in Milano for a trade show for his swimwear line.

He used to say, "Sailing in the winter...

"is the best comparison to life in the world of commerce."

Oh, no!

Morris' teakwood deck!

Yeah. Grand adventure. Great.

Nice work, Tom Jones.

Trudy, I know that it's upsetting, but wouldn't Morris say, "What a grand adventure?"

Yeah, you're right. No big deal. He's probably laughing up in heaven.

We should have used paper cups.

No, but it's not the same thing.

You need a nice glass for a beautiful wine, you know?

Oh, boy.

Look. It's a piece of glass right in her hand.

Are you all right, honey?

Yeah, she's thinking of something, Tony.

One loop. One continuous thing.

She's talking to herself. It's strange.

Honey, you should go to bed.

If it was all one continuous loop. Yeah.

Hi, I'm Touissant.

Touissant? Who's this guy?

It's not for me. Is it for you?

No, it's not for me, man.

The plumber.

What's he here for?

What do you think? Terry.

Terry. Oh, Terry.

Oh, no, wait. What's going on? What is this man doing in my room?

This is...

-Touissant. -Touissant.

Terry, Touissant.

Well, I mean, I've taped my show...

and then, well, exactly how long is this going to take?

Well, it shouldn't take more than a day.

What accent is that, Joy?

What country is that from?

-Haiti. -Haiti.

Haiti?

It's French and Creole.

French and Creole.

Well, is there any way... Could you please put a curtain up here...

so that I can come and go in my room and watch my show while he's still working?

Of course. I have a stapler.

Thank you, sir.

You're welcome, mademoiselle.

Mademoiselle?

Good luck in here and good luck with the... that.

Why don't you go to bed?

Keep going up the stairs. Go to bed.

I don't want to go to sleep. I don't want to have that horrible dream.

Come on! You can't have the same dream twice. It never happens.

-It's impossible. -That's not true.

I had the Peggy dream so many times when I was younger...

with the masks and the robe.

It doesn't make sense. No, no.

You can't have the same dream twice. Maybe it's the...

Rudy, she's thinking about something.

Maybe it's a good dream, and she's working something out.

I don't wanna work anything out. I just want a nice, dumb sleep.

Let's knock her out. Give her a children's cough medicine.

-That's what does it. -Is that safe?

No. It's not safe.

It's expired.

Go on, there. Knock it back, honey.

-No. -Okay, one more. Knock it down. Come on.

-Rudy! -Do it, Tony.

-I don't know. -Just do it. One more.

Okay, one more.

Enough with this! That's it. I'm gonna make her a hot toddy.

That's what she needs.

You're gonna intoxicate her.

It's all natural, it's all herbal. Nothing strong.

I was kidnapped by another monk, who was from Switzerland.

And it turned out that this monk was a duke of a royal family.

I shouldn't say "was," because he still is.

Leave me alone.

I don't think we should let her sleep on the stairs.

Let's just put it here in the couch, okay?

Seventeen years.

Think about it. We've been hiding...

for seventeen years.

Seventeen years.

We used to make things. Seventeen years ago.

Then, that all stopped. What happened?

When you're hiding, you're safe...

because people can't see you.

But, funny thing about hiding...

you're even hidden from yourself.

Baby, what's the matter?

Tony, you need to move out of the basement.

You need to get your own house.

What? Why?

Because I go out at night and sing at Angela's club?

-Is that it? -No.

Because we've been divorced for two years.

We need to move on.

You need to move out.

Rudy, you need to move out, too.

What?

There's more room in the basement for me now.

And another thing, Rudy.

Tomorrow, I would like to have a meeting with you and Trudy at your office...

to discuss her investing in the manufacturing of my new idea.

No.

I'm still getting to know her and falling in love.

I can't do that. I won't do that.

And what manufacturing idea? What are you talking about?

I have always been there for you, no matter what.

I didn't go away to school.

I stayed to help you and Mom through the divorce and do your accounting.

I let you live here whenever you want...

no matter what it is.

I am respectfully asking for the favor that you owe me.

If you look into your heart, you'll know that I'm right.

Cristy, I need to use your crayons, your colored pencils and your paper.

Let's go to my room.

You're not gonna believe this.

So, you know that plumber that you recommended?

Yeah, Touissant.

So I hire him, Terry freaks out, completely disoriented.

Hasn't had a man in her room for eight years, since Rudy.

Makes me hang a drop cloth.

The way I look at it...

is that this is an opportunity for you to invest in a new business...

...that'll mean more money for you.

Tell Rico, Dad. Number five's gotta go off.

Rico, number five, no, off.

Go off! Thank you!

It's a standard handle, 53 inches.

The sleeve connects to the mop head.

Now, this is where it gets complicated.

There's a clip that connects the sleeve to the...

I don't even know what to call it. The "cup. "

Which is connected to the mop head.

So, when you pull up on the sleeve, the mop head stretches...

so you can wring it without ever touching it with your hands.

The only thing we see is this crayon drawings.

We can't make heads or tails.

We don't know what it is.

So, the mop doesn't hang loose, like hair? Like a string?

It hangs, but not on loose, open ends like hair.

It's one continuous loop.

-I don't get it. -I don't get it.

-I don't get it. What's he doing here? -What's he doing here?

He is the father of our children, and my friend, and he looks out for me.

We're doing an invention.

Cheers.

Right.

Yes we are, Cristy.

It's very serious.

It's priority.

Yes it is.

And I'm helping.

Yes you are.

It's done like that, in Haiti.

Touissant is teaching me how to speak French.

And the word for "industrious" is...

Yes.

At first I thought maybe something scary would happen...

like what happened with Danica while she was kidnapped by a man...

who turned out to be in hiding from the royal family in Switzerland...

and then she moved to Switzerland.

Of course, she befriended that man and more.

Don't ever try and limit me, Joy.

And let me know if you want some of this Chakalaka.

Chaka. Say "chaka."

Chaka.

It's very good.

- See you soon. - Goodbye.

Hey, Rocky. Hey, Tom!

Take her inside the office.

-Hey, Tino. -Hey, Joy.

I wanted to show you something.

So, will you help me figure this out?

I know that it has to be welded. This part is supposed to twist.

1... 2... 3...

4, 5, 6...

What are you doing?

38, 39, 40.

All right. All right, Dad, come over here and grab this.

Grab it right in the middle.

Okay. There.

And go up, Jackie go down. You see it?

Not yet.

All right. Here.

-How about now? -No.

Well you're going to.

I don't see it yet, I mean...

-You ready? -Yeah.

300 feet of continuous cotton loops.

That's what I drew.

This is why I would like to ask you for your investment, Trudy.

Morris worked 50 years to earn his fortune, Joy.

Before he passed on to the next world, he made me promise on his deathbed...

that I would never be neglectful with one dollar of the money...

that he so carefully earned.

Therefore you have to answer Morris's four questions of financial worthiness.

Are you ready?

I think so. Yes.

Question number one:

Where did you go to high school?

Plainfield Public High.

Question number two: Who were you in high school?

I was valedictorian.

The smartest student in the school.

That's good, right?

Perhaps.

Joy might be a brilliant, unrealized creator of commerce.

But on the other hand...

it's equally possible that she is a fatally flawed underachiever...

doomed to a lifetime of failure, disappointment, unfulfilled expectations.

You must admit, Joy...

that your life, to date, makes a stronger case for...

...disappointment.

I don't care about any of this.

It's not only risky, but it's fiscally irresponsible...

and doesn't make any sense, whatsoever.

Joy's never run a business in her life.

I've been running my father's garage for the last 10 years.

Our father.

I have ventures that I'm planning to launch here...

at this existing business.

You never mentioned any of this...

until I came to Trudy to ask for an investment.

What's Morris's third question?

Are you prepared...

within six months of commencing this venture...

to show adequate returns?

I accept your terms.

Don't do it, Joy.

What's the fourth question?

You are in a room, and there is a gun on the table.

And the only other person in the room is an adversary in commerce.

Only one of you can prevail.

Yet, you have protected your business and Morris's money.

Do you pick up the gun, Joy?

That's a very strange question.

There is nothing strange about this question at all.

This is money.

Do you pick up the gun?

I pick up the gun.

Good.

I'm going to remember that you said that...

when I speak to my lawyer.

What did Trudy's lawyer say?

He did a worldwide patent search.

What's a patent?

A patent is like a law that you get to protect your idea.

A lot of people patent their ideas...

but only a few of them actually get their ideas made.

So Trudy just wanted to be careful...

Joy...

I just wanted to let you know that Touissant has almost finished his work.

And, um...

You know, we really need to find some more work for him.

-You want more work in the house? -Yeah.

I have another big job I have to go to.

-What? -Yes.

-Well, but we have real issues here. -Sorry.

-We don't have money for that work, Mom. -Well...

Okay.

Joy...

What is happening to you, Mother?

I don't know what's going on.

Are you in love with Touissant?

I was feeling alone.

And I didn't even realize it, you know?

And then...

What did the patent search find?

Trudy just wanted to be careful.

And this guy found a man that's in Texas...

who worked for another guy in another country...

where they have an idea that might be similar to my mop.

What country?

Hong Kong.

The Hong Kong man has a representative in Dallas, Texas.

The Dallas man was very reasonable with my lawyer.

Hey.

So, this guy in Texas...

We're supposed to pay him a royalty on the patent as a protection, right?

Right.

To be safe from any claims.

Is that correct?

Please stop using the word "we."

None of this is your money or your business.

But the same guy also owns a manufacturing plant...

that you guys say that it's cheaper than any other place?

-Yes. In California. -Yes.

A metal and plastic injection mold factory.

Okay, so it's the same guy.

-He owns the patent... -This happens all the time in business.

You find the best partner. It's smart.

He doesn't understand business. He doesn't know business.

-No, no, I'm the first to say that. -I understand business.

Dad and I, we buy parts for the trucks all the time at the garage.

Morris did it all the time.

One-stop shopping. It's the cheapest.

-But is that normal? -That's how he made his money.

-Yeah, that's normal. -Yes!

But is it normal, the same guy who has the patent...

is the same guy who has the manufacturing?

-Yeah. Make it best. -Yeah.

-Yeah? -Better if it's that way.

Okay, and the lawyer? Right? Morris's lawyer?

-He's good. Let's not make trouble. -He's very good.

But he specialized in garment business, no? Not manufacturing business.

Tony. Let's quit while we're ahead.

I know that you want Tony to be your counselor, if you will...

and I will respect that...

as Tony and you should respect what we're proposing...

as the lawyer for this whole business endeavor.

All right. The parts have arrived from California...

and we can start manufacturing here.

I have the first assembled mop.

I told you it was gonna be more refined.

And it is.

Father Martinez is here.

You need to set those women up right now and get going.

They're gonna be so grateful for the jobs, Joy.

Okay. All right. I'll go talk to those ladies.

Now I finally have jobs for them.

- Hi, thanks for coming, Father. - Hi, Joy.

There are many people in our church that need work.

- And my cousins. - How are they?

I have work for you people.

and it consists of sewing

these cotton heads.

Like so... Look.

Very easy.

And I'll show you guys how to assemble...

I'm a little proud of you. I gotta admit it.

But, it costs much more than $15,000 to make the first run.

I know, Trudy.

But with all due respect, that actually wasn't my fault.

Look at this. More bills.

-What? -Another bill from Gerhardt.

This guy keeps billing me for his mistakes.

-That's business. -No.

That's not the way I do business.

I'm calling this guy.

Gerhardt, I'm not gonna keep paying for these parts...

that it's taking you four times to get right.

That was your design. You have to pay for those parts.

That's mold-making. That's the process.

My clients pay when we figure it out.

It was not my design, Gerhardt.

It was your mistake. I'm not paying it.

That was your design. You have to pay.

Did you just hang up on him?

This guy was supposed to be easy and inexpensive.

He keeps overbilling us. I'm not paying for it.

Nobody pay it.

I'm gonna fight it out with this guy.

Just assemble them and try to sell them.

Just put it in your window. Let your customers decide.

My family's been going to you my whole life.

Look, the big companies, they pay me for my shelf space.

Maybe you can sell one of your mops to those big companies.

And maybe they'll put it on my shelf.

lt's expensive, at $19.95, but it's the only mop you'll ever have to buy.

But I don't want people to buy one mop for $20...

and never have to buy another mop again.

I'd rather they keep buying our mops at $5, 50 times, 100 times.

Look, you were broke and bored. You had an idea.

So what? Lots of people have ideas.

Go home. Please, take care of your family.

Hi. Would you like to try a new mop?

It's the only mop you'll ever have to buy.

-Hi. Would you like to try a new mop? -No.

It's self-wringing.

You can remove the mop head, throw it in the washing machine.

-No germs. -No.

No.

-No? -Look at that.

You want to just try it? You could just try.

It can self-wring. See? No other mop does this.

Come and try the brand-new mop!

-It's the mop of the future. -No, thanks.

Want to try this mop, ladies?

-What's this? -Hey, miss.

It's a brand-new mop.

You could wring it without getting your hands dirty.

I don't think so.

Come on. Try it. It's the mop of the future.

Self-wringing, huh?

Yeah.

All right. I do like the idea of that.

I hate having to touch the mop head after I get done cleaning the bathroom floor.

I always think that's disgusting, you know?

It's so gross.

Wow. It really does get all the corners that my sponge mop won't get.

All those crannies where my kids spill theirjuice.

I really like it. Can we buy it?

Take it easy, Cristy.

Wow. I mean, that's just amazing. You really don't have to touch it.

Look at that.

You know what would make this perfect...

if you could remove the mop head, put it in the washing machine...

-Really get it clean. -That'd be great.

-You can. -What?

Are you serious?

-Well how much is this mop? -It's $19.95.

No, that's too much.

But I guess, I mean, if it is the only mop that you ever have to buy...

I mean we keep buying those $5 mops.

-Hi, Daddy. -Hi, sweetie.

You, you remember Angela? And her two brothers, right?

I do. Hello.

-Mommy, the policeman. -Ma'am?

Did we break the law?

-I'm taking this merchandise. -No, no. We're leaving. We're leaving.

-Now, I'm gonna let you off with a warning. -We were just leaving.

No. Sir...

If the customers can just see what the mop can do...

But if I catch you out here again, you will be prosecuted!

Well, where do I go? Sir, please!

-You cannot sell on Kmart property! -I made those mops myself.

-I paid for them. Please. -It took a lot of work.

I won't come back, but you don't have to take my stuff!

Please!

-Are you even allowed to do this? -How embarrassing for you...

to be seen here like this with your daughter.

-What kind of parent are you, huh? -Yeah, Tony.

-Enough. -Hey.

Hey, hey, guys. Guys...

-All right. -Come on.

-Let's go. -Tony, let's go.

Yeah, I'm coming. I'm coming.

Cristy, honey, it's okay. Your mommy's okay.

This stupid thing. This place is falling apart!

No... No.

Honey, the telephone isn't working.

I know. I just got the notice.

I had to go next door to use the phone. Tommy's got a fever.

Tommy has a fever?

Simple cold with a cough. It's going around. All the kids have it.

Thank God the heat's still working.

Mommy, why isn't the phone working?

Because I'm late on paying the bill.

-Are we gonna lose our house? -Not you too.

No, we're not gonna lose our house.

Come on. Get upstairs. Get in the bath.

Listen to your mom and get right in that tub.

-I don't want a hot bath. -I don't care.

Cristy, you get in that hot bath. Listen to your mother.

I don't want you getting sick too.

Lauren Wells said you're a cleaning lady and sell used mops.

Lauren Wells said that?

Yeah. And it really hurt my feelings.

First of all, even if I was a cleaning lady, so what?

There's no shame in hard work.

And second of all, you know, I'm...

I'm trying to sell a new mop, not used mops.

And third of all, don't take any guff from anybody.

You know, don't let it in.

I know it's hard. And I'm sorry that happened.

Now get in the bath.

Come on. Go to sleep, honey.

Joy?

Not now, Mimi.

Joy, wait, wait. Just tell me what happened today.

I want to know how it went. Please, I want to know.

It was a disaster.

But you must never give up.

Ever since you were little, you were born to bear...

Born to bear what, Mimi?

Failure? Disgrace?

Humiliation in front of my daughter?

You were born to be the unanxious presence in the room.

And I know that I'm gonna live to see you grow...

to be the successful matriarch that you were born to be.

Matriarch...

To be a mother with courage.

Who can't even support her children.

Sweetheart.

What are you doing here?

I have this idea.

-A guy I know. -What guy?

He used to work with me. And now he works at this big retailer.

A new way of doing business.

I mean, it's worth a try.

You would do that for me?

Of course.

They were the best divorced couple in America.

Much better friends than they were husband and wife.

I can get you a meeting with him.

Where is it?

But I don't understand what we're doing in Amish country.

They don't even have electricity out here. How could they sell anything on TV?

It has nothing to do with Amish people.

It just happens to be located here. I looked it up.

In Amish country.

Amish.

What?

-Amish. -Amish.

Sign in, please.

We're here to see Marv Brickman.

Okay.

Marv Brickman, does he know who you are if I call his office?

Of course he knows.

We're friends. We used to work together.

QVC, please hold.

But Tom was wrong about that. He was wrong about the numbers...

Tony.

Marv. How are you?

I can't see you today.

Why?

Maybe tomorrow if you can stay in town.

No, we left the kids at home. We can't.

We can't stay until tomorrow.

Listen, you can't just expect to come in here and see someone.

Hey, did you take care of that advertising thing?

-Yes, I did. -Good. All right.

What's going on here?

-This is my good friend, Tony. -Tony Miranda.

We worked together at Campbell's.

Neil Walker.

-And this is his ex-wife. -Good to meet you.

-Joy. -Hi. Neil.

She's an inventor.

She wanted two minutes of your time today, but, Neil, don't worry about this.

-Maybe tomorrow. -You know what?

Why don't you come in for five minutes while the sales group's still here.

-Okay. Hold my bag. -Neil, are you sure?

-Yeah. -Yeah, absolutely.

Thank you.

-Got everything? -Yeah.

Great. Thank you, man.

Thank you.

So tell us your name, please.

I'm Joy.

And what would you like to show us today?

I have a self-wringing mop.

Just...

Do you need some help?

No. No, no.

All right.

That's my shoe.

Oh, my goodness. I am so sorry, sir.

Sock's wet.

Do you mind?

Sorry.

Is that plastic?

Yes.

Arnold, why don't you give it a try? Is that okay?

Yes, of course.

Just dunk it.

-I dip it? -Yes.

And then I... twist it?

But you pull... You have to pull it first.

-Pull it and twist it. -You got to pull it first before you twist it.

-I'm pulling it and... -Pull and twist.

and I am twisting it.

Pull and twist, just like when you're on the road.

We don't mean to be disrespectful, Joy. It's the end of a long day for us.

I feel like I want to tell you a little bit about who I am.

Because I have a feeling you don't know exactly where you are right now.

Am I right?

Ten months ago...

a man named Barry Diller called me from Los Angeles.

He started a television network. Fox television channel.

And prior to that, he ran 20th Century Fox, among other studios.

And he acquired a little cable channel...

right here in Lancaster, Pennsylvania.

And he hired me to run it...

as a bigger idea.

Now, I'm from Detroit, Michigan.

I ran America's largest, most affordable...

successful, value-driven retailer.

Chain called Kmart.

Prior to that, I was a buyer for Kmart.

And prior to that, I managed seven separate Kmart stores.

I decide what products we let into our stores here...

into people's homes, 24 hours a day, for our valued customers.

I choose very carefully and very conservatively.

I spend most of my day deflecting incoming shots from people like yourself.

You see that chart?

This green line either rises or stays the same each month.

There's no problem with my product choice.

Do you know what QVC stands for, Joy?

No, I don't.

Quality, Value, Convenience.

I sell product affordably, but I don't sell cheap product.

And your mop is plastic and it looks strange.

I don't know anything about charts.

Or...

...business, frankly.

But I do clean my own home.

And I made this mop...

because it is better than anything else out there.

Please give me a chance.

I like that it's plastic...

because it's so light in my hands, it's like nothing.

It's also ten times more absorbent than any other mop on the market.

Why?

Because of 300 feet of continuous cotton loop that I looped myself.

That is an enormous amount of absorbent cotton...

on a very small mop head.

Now I'm done with the bathroom, and I haven't wrung the mop once.

Let me ask you a question.

Would you take this mop...

where you were just cleaning the bathroom...

and around the toilet, and all of those germs...

and take it into the kitchen...

where your family eats, where you feed your children?

I take this mop head, I put it in the washing machine...

it comes out clean like new.

You can't do that with any other mop.

-So... -Stop.

Can you make 50,000 of these mops by next week?

Yeah, I think so.

David Selznick, the son of immigrants...

married Jennifer Jones from Oklahoma, America's sweetheart.

That just goes to show you that in America...

the ordinary meets the extraordinary every single day.

Thomas. Where are you going with that?

The skinny pants you wanted.

I never said "skinny pants." I said, "stovepipe." Classic look.

I heard "skinny pants"

You know how much I love the stovepipe.

-Stovepipe. Classic. Got it. -Got it.

-Fine, we'll go for stovepipe. -Thank you.

See those guys? I told them so many times and they still don't understand.

A very smart guy once said...

"You tell somebody something once, they don't listen. You tell somebody four times, they don't listen.

"By the ninth time you say it, they begin to hear you."

That's why we're on 24 hours a day.

That's why, with the people who I have to tell about the stovepipe.

Music in the makeup rooms?

Yeah, I thought it'd give a sense of place, Todd.

But if you don't want it, you can always turn it down.

You're our biggest seller, Todd.

Whatever you need to make you comfortable. You're who we care about.

You're our number-one seller.

-What? -Oh, no.

He's your number-one seller?

No, no, no. Cindy, please. You know that we love you.

Oh, for heaven sake.

She's never had a professional attitude. Clearly, she's jealous.

But could you do me a favor? Make her your friend.

Could you just do me that favor, Todd? Please?

For me?

-Yes, sir. -Thank you.

This is Joy. She has a very exciting new mop that we're gonna introduce next week.

I would like you to launch it. You're my first choice.

A mop?

You want me to bring this newborn into the world?

That newborn that you're holding is every cent, every dollar, even debt...

that I've ever made.

Every cent you've ever made?

That's right.

That kind of pressure is not helpful.

-What? -No

It's not part of my process, either.

Oh.

-Todd... -I didn't mean to pressure you, Todd.

-Performers can be finicky creatures. -He's very sensitive.

He is our number-one seller. He is selling everything through the roof...

in numbers we've never seen before.

I take it very seriously.

I see it as a privilege that we have to go into people's homes.

And I despise anybody who's cynical about that.

Jack Warner wasn't cynical about that. Darryl Zanuck wasn't cynical about that.

And Neil Walker is not cynical about that.

Let me show you the stage.

I believe eventually, one day...

television will even be by and about actual regular people.

Maybe even on computers, 24 hours a day.

Who knows? Nobody thought this network would be real.

And here we are.

-By the way, stock's going through the roof. -What...?

Must be mindful of Joan's dog.

Who's... Who's Joan?

Thank you, darling.

You're never gonna make it in a man's world dressed like that.

Mr. Peepers, you were almost a Peepers pancake.

It's a round stage that has four or five different sets that rotate...

depending on what we're selling at a given moment.

The clasp is part of the necklace. See?

Look at the quality in this clasp. That's what we do.

Absolutely exquisite.

Here comes Joan and Cindy. Watch this.

These guys are major.

Joan's the original seller.

If you're just starting yourjewelry wardrobe, can you do anything better than this?

You're gonna mix in your blacks, your golds, your pearls.

-Everything. -Everything.

Look at it against the peach. Okay?

-Look at that. -Morning.

-Look at that. -Green. Afternoon.

-Look. Black, night. -Black, evening.

-Of course at night. -I mean, can you be more elegant?

So it's functional. Elegant.

You can wear it alone. You can wear it... What I love....

See. Stars and people, they always make the mistake.

They think it's about the face, but it's not.

It's about the hands.

Because that's what people use.

They hold things they care about.

And her hands are gonna become their hands.

And that becomes them.

And then their voice, and then their eyes.

Stars always make the mistake.

It's really about the hands and the voice. That's the heart of it.

Number J-6276.

A $100 value.

Are they not phenomenal?

-Now watch this. -These can be yours.

-Cindy's gonna lay this down right... -But you need to call in right now.

$39.99.

...now!

You need this. You can get this.

You need to call right now, though.

-I'm being told we have limited quantity left. -Watch the calls come in.

Watch them. Here they come.

For $39.99, you might as well get several.

Calls coming in now.

Calls. Calls.

Calls. Calls. Calls. Calls.

Look at the count. I guarantee we're gonna go over twenty.

Those are FTC standards. Those are legal.

Those are coming in. Keep your eyes... Those are actual sales, Joy.

Lines are busy?

-Is the queue full? -Queue's full.

Okay. We need a phone call right now.

When they can't call through, we gotta keep them watching.

Did we get a call? Did we get a call?

Okay. Got it.

Keep this going. Phone call right now.

Wait, wait, wait! We have a caller! We have a caller!

Sharon from Colorado. Hi, Sharon.

Hi, Sharon.

Cindy and Joan! I can't believe I'm talking to you!

Are you happy with your necklace?

These necklaces are so gorgeous and timeless.

-My great-grandmother had things like this. -Yes, yes. Keep it going.

I am so excited to have these.

Keep it going. Yes. Yes. Yes.

Get one for your mother. Get one for your sister.

Watch the counter, Joy. Joy.

-You will not regret owning this. -No, you will not.

See those numbers?

We're gonna wind up at 25,000.

Cindy knows how to close it.

Wow.

Okay, I want you to go home, I want you to call your lawyer.

Look at your contract.

Make sure your product factory is in line.

-Okay? -Okay.

Okay, Godspeed, good luck. Here we go. I'll walk you out.

You can't expect Trudy to write a check for $200,000 for 50,000 mops...

when you already owe her $18,000 to make mops you haven't even sold yet.

Do you understand that there is a business that wants to sell my mop on television?

It's going to sell.

Fine. You feel so strongly about it, you put up half the money.

Yes. It's only fair that you share the financial risk, too.

How's she gonna do that? She's got nothing. She's got no money.

What, do you want me to take out a second mortgage on my house?

They want me to take out a second mortgage on my house.

A second mortgage?

But the house, the kids, Joy.

What's gonna happen, Joy? How would you do that?

I don't know.

-Hey. How you doing? -Hey.

You know I've been watching you through that fence since you were a little girl?

-Yeah. -I've been watching you grow up.

-Hey, listen. -What?

You think it would be okay if I...

-You wanna fire a few rounds? -I do.

Yeah. Might make you feel better.

Thank you. I think it will.

-You know how to hold it? -Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

Okay. Sure.

Good.

Good.

Good.

Good.

This is it! Oh, my gosh.

Get ready. This is definitely gonna change the holidays...

for anyone who has a floor or a bathroom...

because we have the most exciting new home product in years.

Yeah!

This is the new self-wringing mop.

Okay, okay, okay!

lt's the new standard in homes, right here.

Let's take a look at this. This is brought to you only by QVC.

Now, this is clearly extremely soft and absorbent cotton.

There we go.

You just take this, and you...

start...

I'm not sure. This is a little trickier than it looks.

Put it...

Well, it's getting my arm wet, here.

Let's see. We got no sales here.

What happened?

Is there a call?

So there... So there are no calls.

All right.

And we do not have any sales still so here's what we're gonna do.

We're gonna move on. Now, we're gonna move on.

Cindy is gonna talk to Sarina Kimball, former star from Falcon Crest and Dynasty...

and she is gonna tell us all about her new line of gowns.

These are my special occasion gowns...

"Special." How apropos.

...that were inspired by all of the times that I was in Dynasty and Falcon Crest.

That is absolutely amazing.

I want you to pan in. Look at these.

-Look at the detail. -Look at the detail.

Look at the value in that.

About how many sequins would you say that is?

That's it?

-That's all? -No, it's over.

That's how fast it happens.

No, they're gonna give her a second chance.

No, they're not gonna give her a second chance.

That's not what's gonna happen.

They're going to give her a second chance.

-Why do you have to be so negative? -They will.

$200,000!

50,000 mops.

Now, this is easily one of my favorites.

She's wearing the black and gold...

Joy.

Hello?

5,107 sequins for...

Get this. How much?

$299.

I'm sorry the product didn't sell.

That man didn't know what he was doing, Neil.

Well, it wasn't the man, Joy. It was the product.

I made 50,000 units because you told me to.

I mortgaged my house, I'm in $200,000 of debt. More.

Well, it's your business. It's your debt.

And we indemnify up to a third, if you read your contract.

To be honest, that's even gonna be hard to get.

Neil, you gotta give us another chance.

I'm so sorry, Joy.

I just can't bring it to my boss. I can't.

I can't accept your answer.

I can't, and I won't.

Joy, you have to let Trudy report this loss in bankruptcy...

because otherwise she's gonna hemorrhage even more money.

You have to file, too...

because you mortgaged your children's future and you lost...

and you have to prepare yourself for that.

You have to file for bankruptcy.

I warned you so many times, Joy!

Dad, I warned you to not spend her money!

Come on! You've been plotting against her from the very beginning, Peggy!

Now we're bankrupt, Tony!

I'm in a meeting with our lawyers.

What do you think you're doing?

"Go home, Joy, and watch the numbers roll in on television.

"Make 50,000 mops...

"borrowing and owing every dollar, including your home."

It could have been handled better.

I'll let Todd have another shot.

I don't want Todd or anyone else to try it.

It should be me.

We don't have regular people.

We have celebrities or spokesmodels do the selling.

I told you this.

Who showed you the mop?

Who sold it to you? Who taught you how to use it?

And who convinced you that it was great after you thought it was worthless?

Excuse me, can you give us a second?

Come with me.

You ever been in front of a TV camera? You comfortable in front of a TV camera?

Because when you get there, there's lights and there's camera, and people freeze up.

You said to me that David Selznick, the son of immigrants...

married Jennifer Jones, an all-American girl from Oklahoma...

because in America, all races and all classes...

can meet and make whatever opportunities they can.

And that is what you feel when you reach into people's homes with what you sell.

You said that.

What do you think? Looks great, right?

Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Beautiful.

Very vogue, very classic.

All right, if you come back next time... Lori? Lori?

I just want you to just put the hair a little bit forward, just like that, if she comes back again.

Okay? Not with the comb, not with the comb.

-Try the black. -Okay.

Okay?

It's gonna be perfect.

Wow.

Beautiful. What do you think? How do you feel?

I'd like to change just one thing. Would you mind?

-Okay, surprise me. -Small thing.

I'll surprise you.

Okay, surprise me.

What would the small thing be that she changes?

What?

You undid the whole thing.

This is me.

This is you?

You've got the exact same outfit you had when you came in here.

I wear a blouse and I wear pants.

That's who I am.

I want to go on as me.

Gonna go on as you.

I hope you make it back.

Joan, Cindy. Say good luck to Joy.

-Wow. -Wow.

You look great. Good luck today.

-Thank you. -Good luck.

That's her, that's how she is.

Blouse and... She should be in a skirt. She's got nice long legs.

Show her legs.

Good luck.

Joan Rivers wants me in a skirt, but I'm gonna do pants.

Do what you want to do.

Come on, let's go upstairs.

Are you nervous?

Yes.

Just be yourself.

Just remember, it's all about the hands.

Here we go.

Ready... Stage is moving!

Household product 375 in three, two...

What are you doing? Come on.

Go! Go!

She's freezing.

Sorry, these lights are so bright.

Nobody tells you how bright these lights... Well, Neil did tell me.

Neil is my boss. Here.

I should thank him for letting me be up here.

-Sorry. -You're Joy.

I am Joy.

Just say something! Talk about the mop!

Oh, my God.

We have to do something.

We have to do something.

Do we have a call?

-Could we go to a call? -We have a call.

-It's a friendly call? -It's a friendly call.

Okay. Take it. Take it.

Joy, we have a call.

A call? How did that happen?

Well, we have a call.

Hi. Joanne from New York.

Joanne from New York.

We have a call coming in from Joanne from New York.

Yeah, I'm calling in because I would love a mop that I don't have to touch when I wring it.

You know, my hands get raw and when I mop broken glass...

and I wring the mop, I cut my hands.

Do you ever cut your hands when you're wringing?

Joanne, that is so funny that you said that.

That is actually exactly how I was inspired to invent this mop.

There was glass shattered everywhere. I was with my two kids, with my father, and I...

Every time I would wring the mop, I would get glass shards in my hands.

And the old mop just wasn't very absorbent.

So I went to my daughter's room, and I borrowed her crayons...

and I designed this mop.

Make sure you get down there. Yeah, that's it.

It's made of plastic, so it's lightweight, but very durable.

Go in. Go in to the hands.

It's extremely absorbent...

with 300 continuous cotton loops...

that I looped myself when I designed it.

-How much is it? -It is $19.95.

I like that price. I want a whole bunch of them.

Thank you.

H375. That's the order number.

Household item 375.

I guarantee you...

That's it. Stay right there.

...you are not going to find another mop like this that exists.

If there was, I would have bought it and I wouldn't have cut my hands up.

You can get across the whole kitchen with one wring. Just imagine that.

Watch this.

Chocolate syrup.

Go the syrup. Go the syrup.

Baby food. A very big spill at my house.

Very common spill for me.

No. Hands, hands.

Now, the biggest difference, I don't have to touch this disgusting mop head.

There's not another mop on the market...

that has as much absorbent cotton as this mop right here.

And I guarantee you, there will be no regrets, no returns.

I have been mopping for most of my life, every single day.

Phones are ringing!

I cannot tell you how much this mop has changed my life.

-Phones are ringing! Phones are ringing! -The phones are ringing. The phones are ringing.

Go.

This is gonna be the greatest mop to have around Christmas time...

when you have family over...

I am a mother of two. There is just spill after spill.

Family comes to town.

You can mop your entire kitchen with one wring!

Oh, my God! 29,000!

This is very special!

I haven't even told you about my personal favorite feature...

which is the removable mop head...

that I can put into the washing machine and it will come out clean as new.

Yes! Yes!

Oh, my God, these numbers keep climbing!

Thank you. I...

Yes, that's right. Keep it going.

Thank you.

This is the most absorbent mop on the market. It's lightweight.

It's the only mop that you're ever gonna buy, the best mop you're ever gonna use.

It is lightweight and durable, and that is just me speaking from my experience.

As someone who mops their house every single day, from my heart.

This woman's gonna be a whole new business.

No way.

Oh, my God.

Can you believe it? Can you believe it?

I thought for sure you were gonna tell me that your counting machine was broken.

I listened to you. You were right.

I just can't believe that actually happened.

I know.

I guess you could say we're friends in commerce.

Friends in commerce.

Yeah.

Let's promise each other that if, one day, and that day may come...

that we become adversaries in commerce, that we remain friends.

Because that's a true friendship indeed.

Friends in commerce.

I agree. Let's shake on it.

We've got 10 looms...

and then when they're completed, this is where the mop heads are sewn.

Who makes your parts?

A factory out in California.

It was cheaper and faster than any place around here.

Smart. Are they gonna be able to stay on schedule?

Yeah.

One time.

-Right there. -Thank you.

-You're welcome. -Right here?

Hello?

Mimi.

Mimi.

I so hated to leave her that day.

I had so much I wanted to say to her.

And to my great granddaughter.

I felt I wanted to stay near her and watch over her.

Cristy.

There's a problem in California.

There can't be a problem in California. I told Neil that everything was fine.

Gerhardt keeps raising his price. He just did it again.

More money per unit.

He can't do that. We're gonna lose money.

I sent a representative to handle him.

Representative? We don't have a representative.

What representative?

Peggy went.

Peggy?

I don't want to talk about this right now.

She wanted to be part of it.

How could you send Peggy?

She wanted to be part of it.

You both are blood relatives. You're half-sisters.

It's very, very important that you love and respect each other.

I paid them the 20 that you owed them. I had to.

I got them to fill the order of the 100,000...

with a price increase of only two dollars per unit.

We can't increase at all, Peggy. Don't you understand?

We sold at a certain price.

Any hikes, especially the ones he's asking for...

mean that I will lose so much money...

that I'll be in even more debt than I was before.

You're gonna make it back.

I'm gonna make it back?

How?

I've got ideas, you know.

There are things that I'd like to do.

I spoke to him about a project that Dad and I have been designing.

Right, Dad?

Yes, we did.

Do you have any idea how much your idea will cost?

How or where you'll sell it?

If you can even manufacture it after it's taken everything we've got...

to sell this one product that now, thanks to you...

is going to cost more money?

Maybe my product is better than your product.

I can do what you did on TV. It's not that hard.

Isn't that the whole purpose of that channel? It's that everybody could do it?

What your sister does is not easy...

but what we were planning to do...

is not that difficult.

Listen to me.

Never speak on my behalf...

about my business again.

Now I have to go to California.

Can I help you?

I'm Joy. I'm here to see Gerhardt.

He's not available.

I'll wait.

She says she's here to see Gerhardt.

Gerhardt!

Hey. I'm Gerhardt.

I'm Joy.

Come on in.

Derek Markham is my boss.

He lives in Texas.

Fabri-Pac is one of several companies he owns or collects royalties for.

I report to him. He makes pricing decisions.

Well, I've never met or talked to this Derek Markham...

but I've talked to you many times on the phone.

And I do find it very curious...

that the second I'm on television, with a lot of success...

the price for our products goes up.

Seems very unfair to me, to say the least.

Seems like you're shaking us down.

You met Gregory, our plant foreman.

It's very hard for us to lower the cost at this point.

We're already losing a lot of money.

How could that possibly be, with the $500,000 that we've given you...

on top of the $50,000 of advance royalties...

that have gone to a Derek Markham in Dallas.

And that's not even counting what my sister paid you...

without my authority, by the way...

for your overcharges and your mistakes.

Your sister paid the increase that you refused to pay.

Well, she had no authority to do that. She's not an officer of my corporation.

You and I could both spend a lot of time and money in court to prove that I'm right...

but that would just make our lawyers wealthy...

while my product dies instead of being on television...

like it could be right now.

You can pay more.

I can't pay more. I won't.

Costs are higher. Wear and tear on the molds.

We have to remake them every other week.

Is that so? Can I see the molds?

They're in the machines.

It'll take some time to prepare them for you.

Is there a bathroom I could use?

Yeah, it's down the hall. Gregory will show you.

Thanks.

What?

What are you doing in here?

What is this?

These are my designs, these are my molds!

Those are ours!

And we knew you'd be trouble. The cops are on their way.

-We called 'em as soon as you showed up! -These are my molds!

Those are ours!

I'm taking these with me.

I'm taking all of these with me.

I want all of these boxed up, and I'm taking them.

You're trespassing!

It's not your patent!

These are my designs!

I'm not going anywhere without my molds.

What? No. No.

This is not stealing, this is my property!

This is my property.

I have all of these designs. These are all mine. They belong to me!

She's from out of state, John! You've known me 15 years!

All right, come on, ma'am. You're trespassing.

-What? -Yeah. Come on.

-I'm not trespassing. -Yeah, you're trespassing.

I was in his office.

-You don't know. Come on. -He let me into his...

Gerhardt, you're not gonna get away with this.

-You're not gonna get away with this! -Be careful what you're saying.

-You're a thief! You're a thief, Gerhardt! -Be careful, come on, come on.

Be careful. Come on, stop it.

-This is stealing! -Hey, hey, stop it. Come on.

All right.

Watch your step. All right.

What about Trudy's money, Joy?

You have to pay back Trudy's money.

This is only getting worse.

I predicted tragedy, Joy.

You're racking up quite a steep bill.

We had to fly out here, bail you out.

Plus it cost us an extra $10,000 for Ray Cagney...

this California patent attorney, to get us to this point.

We got the state to decline prosecution.

They see it's a contract dispute.

When you paid royalties to Derek Markham in Texas...

it put all your parts and molds under the umbrella of their patent.

I see you brought your drawings and hung them to prove your design.

But it's impossible to fight it now.

You were not properly advised.

Cristy, please!

Tony, take her to bed.

I don't wanna go to bed. I wanna stay here.

I paid those royalties...

because you told me to.

Because your lawyer told me to.

Our lawyer was mistaken. This happens sometimes in business.

It didn't work out for you.

It happens sometimes.

Trudy's lawyer is not a patent attorney.

Which I said!

And you said I had no business being Joy's advisor.

-And now it turns out that I was right! -This is not helpful, Tony!

-That's enough, Tony. Please. -It's enough, now?

I'm very sorry. I wish there was more I could do.

But when your sister Peggy paid the unjustified bills...

that you refused to pay...

it closed the door on that.

What about Neil Walker and QVC?

Wouldn't they pay the expenses on defending the patent?

Be careful, Joy.

You could be sued for misrepresentation and failure to deliver your product.

That's breach.

QVC requires that you deliver a fully patented product.

I've been doing this for a long time.

You're in for a long court process that will stall your product.

And you will probably lose.

I wish I could do more.

Take care, now.

You're gonna have to accept the facts, Joy.

I mean, that's...

You're most of half a million dollars in debt.

I don't know how you're gonna pay it.

We have to declare bankruptcy.

You're gonna have to declare bankruptcy.

I have to declare bankruptcy.

She has to.

-To try to contain my losses. -Yeah.

I have to write it off.

It just seems so wrong.

We've worked so hard.

We've come so far for us to just give up now.

It just seems so unfair!

Business is unfair. That's it.

It's not working out. Well, that's what happens.

That's why people don't go around making invention every other day.

Wake up!

It's my fault.

I gave her the confidence to think she was more than just an unemployed housewife...

selling plastic kitchen stuff to other unemployed housewives...

on a junk cable channel.

It's my fault. It's not your fault, honey.

It was my mistake to make her think that she was more than she was.

She pressured herself into doing something she shouldn't have done.

It was wrong of you to put that pressure on yourself.

It was wrong of us to put that pressure on you.

I need more vodka.

It was wrong of us to think that you'd be an instant business person overnight.

Of course, this is not who you are.

It takes a kind of toughness, a certain acumen...

that you simply don't have.

Sign the paper.

You have to sign these bankruptcy papers, honey.

The notary's right outside. Let me get her.

You're gonna have to move out of your house immediately.

You're gonna have to move into an apartment.

Maybe you can move into a room in Trudy's house.

With the children?

Yeah. You have room.

She's my daughter. Why not?

Let's talk about it.

Trudy, we have to offer her something.

Again?

Why me?

Please sign, honey.

Thank you.

Mimi said you were the one born to help carry the family to success.

No, Cristy. Mimi was wrong.

The world does not give you opportunities.

The world destroys your opportunity and it breaks your heart.

I should have listened to my mother when I was 10 years old.

I should have spent the rest of my life...

watching TV and hiding from the world like my mother.

So I don't wanna hear any more about Mimi.

She was wrong.

She had her head in the clouds and it was full of stupid ideas.

And it gave me stupid ideas.

Like this.

This stupid, stupid idea!

Mommy, don't tear them! No!

Cristy, I'm so sorry.

I'm sorry, Cristy.

I'm so sorry.

Please go to bed. Everybody just go to bed.

Good night, Mommy.

Good night, sweetheart. Just go to bed.

I'm so sorry I failed you, Joy. I'm so sorry.

Just, just don't.

Joy? Joy?

Joy, where are you?

Joy, where are you?

It's open.

You can leave the door open.

No one knows I'm here.

You don't even know who I am.

I could be Derek Markham or I might be someone Derek Markham sent to handle you.

You have no case.

Maybe people think you came to Dallas in despair to take your own life...

because you were in such deep financial trouble suddenly from your little venture.

I made a phone call this morning to Hong Kong.

It was 1:00 a.m. in California but it was 5:00 p.m. the following afternoon in Hong Kong.

I always think it's amazing how time works like that.

And I was fortunate enough to get on the phone with Mr. Christopher...

who I found to be very friendly, which was surprising...

because I really haven't found the gentlemen in California to be very nice...

considering we're all in business together.

Welcome to the world of business, I guess.

I told Mr. Christopher that the reason that I was calling...

was to discuss the differences in the designs of our products.

But I quickly learned that Mr. Christopher has no idea...

if his Hong Kong patent for a self-wringing mop is worth anything or if it even works.

Because they have not made or sold a single mop.

Unlike us, who have sold over 200,000.

And I've paid you over $50,000 in advanced royalties...

on behalf of Mr. Christopher.

Blood money from my family and my second mortgage.

Turns out Mr. Christopher doesn't know anything about those royalties.

So it seems...

we have a case of fraud and embezzlement.

And, as if that weren't bad enough...

I also discovered in the paperwork that our mops actually don't bear any similarities.

So I never did owe you any royalties for your patent.

That's another case of fraud.

My lawyers really could go after you, but I told them, "Give me a day."

To see if maybe you might've made a mistake...

that you would correct, given the chance.

We'll pay you back all the royalties you paid us.

I'll give you $20,000 on top of paying you back the 50.

Okay.

I'll give you $50,000 on top of paying you back the 50.

Plus interest.

I want all of my molds back.

I want you to sign this piece of paper...

saying that you have no rights, financially.

I'm just gonna add... I said the 50...

plus the 50...

plus the interest.

So I just want you to initial next to those two numbers as well.

So just sign there.

She put up with just about anything.

Until when she had to bring the hammer down...

she brought the hammer down.

She couldn't know what was to come.

That she'd go on to make another 100 record-setting patents.

Skinny velvet hangers make neater closets.

That's a big deal to a lot of people.

I mean, who thinks of things like that?

Joy did.

She didn't know any of this would happen as she walked down the street that day.

Yes, sir, tonight's the night for Ol' Saint Nick to make his yearly visit...

to all the folks all over the world.

There's fun and expectation in every house across the land.

And speaking of houses, what do you say we take a little look-in on a typical one?

Now I'll admit that what you see right now is just a small piece of the front of the house...

but all you grownups and kids alike, this is the time for Santa's magic...

so I think we can make it become a real house.

Even a house with love in it.

Mr. Santa Claus, can we have a little snow, please?

Thank you. That's fine.

Now, Santa, let me see what it really looks like inside this house.

She couldn't know that one day she would move into a big beautiful home.

Her mother was happy.

She remained close to her, and with the rest of her family...

which was, as always, complicated.

She would pay for products made by Rudy, Trudy, and Peggy.

Even when they failed.

Even when they wrongly sued for ownership of her company.

As Rudy got older, Joy continued to take care of him and love him.

As Neil Walker predicted, Joy did become a whole new business.

And even outgrew QVC.

-She's talking to her children. -Is Tony in there?

Yes, Tony's in there. The family's in there.

Her ex-husband and her best friend would remain her steadfast advisers.

Please be patient.

I love you. You guys go and pack your rooms.

-Good night, Mom. -I love you.

-Hi. -Hi.

-Welcome. -Thank you.

What do you have?

A traveling clothes cleaner.

Let's see it.

So you're from Memphis?

Yes, I am.

You work as a waitress?

Yes, ma'am.

All right. Let's see it.

You made this yourself?

Yes, I did, ma'am.

I made my first invention myself, too.

I like this, it's a very good design.

Thank you.

Can you stay an extra day, meet with our designers?

No, because of your boss?

What hotel are you staying in right now?

-The Holiday Inn, ma'am. -Holiday Inn.

Let's move them over to the Radisson, get them a suite.

You'll be more comfortable with your baby.

I'll call your boss and get it taken care of, give you an extra day...

so that tomorrow you can come in, meet with the designers.

-We can take it step by step, all right? -Thank you.

We'll work on your idea, see if we can do something.

This means so much to me.

I know what it feels like.

I know what it feels like to be in that chair.

-We'll see you tomorrow, okay? -Thank you, ma'am.

And good luck.

-Thank you for coming. -Thank you.

-Go get the next person, Tony. -Okay.

Neil.

Sorry, we have legal stuff with Barry, now.

Yes, we do.

Here we are.

Here we are.

Adversaries in commerce.

Adversaries in commerce.

-And friends. -Yes.

And friends.

I'm gonna tell you something but you didn't hear it from me.

I don't know who you are or what you're talking about.

That's what I wanted to hear.

Barry's gonna come after you, hard.

But that's just business. That's the way Barry is. He's a negotiator.

UItimately, he needs you.

He's buying HSN.

It's all about HSN now, and he wants you to come with him.

He needs you.

You're going to be very big over there.

That's what's going to happen.

But, you didn't hear it from me, right?

No, I sure didn't. But thank you.

It's nice to see you.

It's good to see you.

I'll see you around, pal.

Yeah.

It's been a long journey.

Yes, it has.

I'm proud of you.

Thank you, Neil.

This right here, this is a special power.

This is a special power.

And then I started to build my very own house...

where I would live and make wonderful creations...

for all the world to see and love.

She didn't know any of this would happen...

as she walked that day.