All language subtitles for Have a Good Funeral, My Friend. Sartana Will Pay (Buon funerale amigos. paga Sartana) (197

Hey, Simpson, look!

A gold nugget.

Show me!

Give it back to me.

You're a pain in the neck
and you're out of luck.

It's a bad deal for you, showing up.

It's a bad deal for you.

- There are corpses on that wagon.
- Corpses?

There's the banker.
Let's see what he says.

Let him through.

It's Benson, poor thing!

I'd like to remind you, Sheriff,
that Benson was my friend.

Whether he was or not,
I always hang murderers.

Sure, if you actually catch them.
We need actions, Sheriff, not words.

We've always lived in peace
in Indian Creek,

and we want that to continue.

Hoffman is right.

Benson, you said?

Yes, he came from Nebraska.

They say he was half-crazy,
but I think all gold prospectors are.

Not necessarily.

I hope I haven't offended you.
Are you looking for gold too?

Yes, except that I look for it
in other people's pockets.

"Don't die yet. I'll be right back."

Our undertaker has a sense of humor.

Hi, Piggot.
What are you doing around here?

Nice flowers. Who paid for them?

It's a luxury funeral.

That wreath cost $20.

- I asked you who paid for them!
- When someone pays me,

I count the money
and don't ask questions.

Who Paid you?

- Who paid for the funeral?
- I don't know. I swear I don't know.

Talk, you old fool!

I don't know anything.

Wait.

Do you have any other weapons?

Yes, a cannon,
but I never bring it along.

Place your bets, gentlemen.

A card?

- Place your bets.
- Thirteen.

Nineteen.

I'm having no luck
at this table tonight.

Tell me about it.
The house always wins.

I'll play a few more hands,
then quit.

Twenty-one. The house wins.

What's the point of playing
when luck's against you?

Luck isn't against you. It's this
gentleman who's manipulating it.

Are you accusing me of cheating?

Yes.

And I'm giving you two minutes
to return their money to them.

Half a minute wasted.

One minute left.

And I'm giving you just one second
to apologize.

Come closer.

Now you'll have to
deal with the boss.

Guns must be left in the cloakroom,
Piggot. Have you forgotten that?

I don't like people
with short memories.

But... you and I are friends.

We were friends.

What a strange watch.
It's not made of silver, is it?

It's made of lead.

I only use the silver one
for special occasions.

Hey!

Between you and me,
Piggot is a very clever cheat.

You must be a good player
if you figured him out.

I invite you to play cards with me.

I don't have cash on me.

You'd have to exchange this for me.

It's a letter of credit.

$20,000?

It's the price poor Benson
wanted for his land.

You were planning to pay Benson
$20,000 for his land?

"If you buy sand,
you build walls of glass."

Confucius said that
and he was a wise man.

He may have been wise, but he may not
have known much about land values.

You can play up to this amount,
my friend.

A meddler, Sheriff.
A damned meddler.

I know what I'm saying and why.

You should keep people like that
away from Indian Creek.

That's enough, Piggot.
Nobody tells me what to do.

Get out!

- I'm finishing my whisky.
- Go finish it somewhere else.

Get out!

As you prefer.

You're playing the tough guy
are you? '

Good night, Sheriff.

Why didn't you let him talk?

He was drunk.

Before you arrived,
he was talking about a funeral.

Everyone knows the gold prospectors
have been buried.

He was talking about
a different funeral,

the one of Simpson and his men,
who killed the prospectors.

All things considered,
that didn't go too badly.

- One last hand?
- Why not?

You shuffle.

A thousand.

Another thousand.

Five thousand.

I only have four thousand.

You can play up to $20,000.

I'm a thousand short.

A king.

And a ten.

Your turn.

A thousand.

A thousand.

Plus ten thousand.

No. I owe you two thousand.

Exchange this
and send the balance to my hotel.

Confucius says that he who brings you
rice and flowers is your friend.

Some people plant rice
to harvest more.

Confucius doesn't say this.

Sartana does.

Nice shot.

You may be good at cheating,
but you're a useless murderer.

What's going on?

This guy will be leaving
in the morning.

He's bidden farewell to Indian Creek
by setting off a few fireworks.

Have you decided to leave?

I made the decision for him.

Does he owe you money, by any chance?

$2,000.

That's not much,
for someone like you.

It could have been worse.

Do you mean to say this is a fake?

Brazenly fake.

Besides, it's obvious he's a crook.

You said he was planning to buy
Benson's lands?

That's what he told me.

He was lying, of course.

The fact is that Benson
never owned that land.

It belongs to one of his nieces.

A rather pretty girl, at least
according to poor old Benson.

By the way, she should be
coming in from Wichita today.

Hey, how long till
the stage coach arrives?

It should be here any second.

Do you really think
Piggot will leave?

I don't know. But I'll go
and say goodbye to him first.

Why?

I haven't managed
to speak to him yet.

He had a word with you yesterday,
and I'll have a word with him today.

I'd hardly call what he did
"having a word".

Hey, you!

Is Piggot here?

Over there.

You were no fool, Piggot,
but someone was smarter than you.

- Jasmine Benson?
- Yes?

Allow me to introduce myself.

I'm Mr. Hoffman, the banker.

You may have heard about me.
I was a close friend of your uncle's.

What do you mean, you "were"?

What happened to him?

I beg you, sir, tell me.

- Shall I help you unpack?
- No, thank you.

I need to be alone. I'm sorry.

I understand.

If you need anything, just ask.

Do you mind if I smoke?

Whoever you are, leave right now
or I'll start screaming.

That would be a mistake.

It's unusual to come across
a friend around here.

- I don't know who you are.
- I was a friend of your uncle's.

You too? You're the second person
to have said that since I got here.

Many people were fond of him
in this town.

I doubt that,
considering what happened to him.

Even friends can be good or bad.
It's up to you to choose well.

My uncle had no friends
here in Indian Creek.

You're right to mistrust everyone.

Anywhere, I'm not from here.

I came over for the funeral.

- For my uncle's funeral?
- No.

For the funeral of his murderers.

I removed them
from this vale of tears,

and I arranged their burial.

It's an old habit of mine.

- You avenged him?
- No. They were paid assassins.

To avenge him,
I need to find out who paid them.

- Is that what you plan to do?
- Now that you're here,

- I also have another plan.
- What's that?

To help you.

What makes you think I need help?

- I brought you some tea.
- How kind of you.

- Weren't you talking to someone?
- No.

Nor was I talking to myself.

Want a cigar?

It could be your last.

Don't move. Hands up!

- It's a tragic misunderstanding.
- Don't shoot!

- I am not involved. They paid me.
- Who did?

If I tell you, will you let me go?

That's an old trick, my friend.
It doesn't work.

- I'm Colorado Joe.
- Never heard of you.

You'll soon get to know me.

You're trapped.
There's no other way out.

My dear girl,
you're young and pretty.

Believe me,
Indian Creek has little to offer you.

Trust me,
this is not the place for you.

So you think those lands
are worthless?

I'm surprised your uncle misled you.

No, he advised me to sell them,
until his last letter.

- And then?
- Then he cabled me to come over.

I must say you're very lucky.

You own a fistful of sand, but since
it's adjacent to my property,

I've decided to buy it off you.

And since your uncle
was such a good friend,

I'm prepared to pay you
an exaggerated price,

three times what it's worth.

Shall we say... $10,000?

- I...
- No, don't thank me.

No, no.
I was just thinking he must be mad.

- To whom do you refer?
- A man called Sartana.

He offered me $20,000.

$20,000 is quite a sum.

- I should have expected that.
- Do you know him?

I know him well enough
to put you on your guard.

Should he want to pay you
with a letter of credit,

show it to me before signing it.

I don't understand.

I've already come across it.

Undertaker, come over here.

How much does a funeral cost?

Between $10 and $15.

Per corpse.

I'll give you $20, but make sure
there are lots of flowers.

- Flowers?
- Lots of them. I must insist.

It's good of you
to take care of the burial.

But you must prove to me
it was a lawful killing.

The proofs in there. May I?

All right.

Tell me, Blackie, have you ever seen
these men in Indian Creek?

- Never.
- Here's the proof, Sheriff.

All considered, this job covers
the funeral costs by a long margin.

Long Harely, $500.

Fred Ohio, $1,000.

Jimmy Bart, $500.

Colorado Joe, $2,000.

What a shame.

Too much work
dragging him out of there.

Do you always come in
through the window?

Doors are noisy.
I'd have had to knock.

Judging by this, I wouldn't say
you're a poor, defenseless girl.

But I can still appreciate the help
of a man like you.

I just wonder why you are helping me.

I've already told you.

In memory of a dear friend.

How strange. I thought
there was also another reason.

You're not wrong.

I'm doing it for a friend,
but also for you.

Yes, now that I think of it,
mainly for you.

I've recorded tonight's proceeds.

Would you like to check?

Did business go well tonight?

If you're here
to collect your balance,

you'd be better off handing over
the $2,000 you owe me.

Banks don't cash in
fake letters of credit.

- Did Confucius say that?
- No, Hoffman, the banker, did.

I thought you were smarter than that.

What if he wanted to buy those lands?

By refusing to exchange
my letter of credit,

he rids himself of a competitor.

And what would he do
with a fistful of sand?

Some people enjoy building
walls of glass.

Here are your $2,000.

Please hand over my letter of credit.

It may well be a fake,
but return it all the same.

The three you got rid of yesterday.

There should have been flowers
at that funeral.

And there wasn't a single one.

Come out! Shoot! Shoot!

Damn it!

I can't hit him!

Blackie!

You'll get your funeral too,
but a real one.

- Excuse me, ma'am.
- What is it?

Blackie is waiting in the storehouse.

In the storehouse?

He saw me. Get it? He recognized me.

I'm not staying in Indian Creek.

What do you want me to do?
Return your badge to the sheriff?

Money. I need money to get
as far from here as possible.

No, Blackie, the only way to save
your skin is to kill Sartana first.

Then you'll get your money.

Lots of money. So much money
it will be worth the risk.

Blackie?

Don't you know he's my deputy?

No one else saw him.
Why should I believe you?

Don't believe me, then.

But be more careful
when you choose your next deputy.

Hey, barman, bring me a Drambuie.

- Wouldn't a whisky be better?
- No, a Drambuie.

It's really disgusting.

Do you have a match?

"Blessed be the Lord, who didn't
leave us prey to their fangs,

"but wanted our lives to be saved."

Psalm 124. Words of gratitude to God.

You should recite it too, Blackie,
because you're still alive.

But not for long,
if you don't spill the beans.

Blackie, tell me who you work for.

Go to hell.

I'll give you time to think about it.

In the meantime,
I'll play you some music.

Enough! Enough!

Enough! Enough!
All right, I'll speak!

I'll tell you everything!

The coast is clear.

You had a right to kill him only
if you can prove it was self-defense.

His death was against my interests.
Dead men don't talk.

No, I'm not paying for this funeral.

My humble abode,
as Lee Tse Tung would say.

Who?

A Chinese man so fat and round, he's
like a bad imitation of the Buddha.

- How did it go?
- Well.

Aren't you afraid
of having men like that around?

This is a dangerous place, dear.

Unfortunately,
men like that are useful.

Sartana's proposal
is undoubtedly attractive.

I can see why,
even knowing he's a crook, you'd...

- Mr. Hoffman, I...
- No need to explain.

It's your land
and you're free to do what you want.

I don't want to risk
having him as a neighbor.

So I'm prepared to match his offer.

- $20,000?
- Except that mine aren't fake.

- You're very generous.
- So we're agreed.

No, sorry. I have something to add.

Sartana has pulled out of the deal.

He's pulled out?

I suppose he didn't have the cash.

The gambling-house owner...
We were just talking about him...

- Lee Tse Tung.
- He made me an offer as well.

40,000.

- Excuse me?
- $40,000.

A huge amount, don't you think?

You're a genius.

There's something about you
that must bewitch men.

I offer you $10,000,
then Sartana offers you double,

and now the Chinese man
is offering you $40,000.

My dear Jasmine,

I must humbly ask you to become
a client of my bank.

Hey, these dice are loaded.

- Don't be absurd. Stop it.
- That's why I keep losing.

- Show me.
- Here they are.

- You're a cheat.
- Why not check them?

I want to check those you hid away.

- I only used this pair.
- So he's a liar.

He called you a liar.

I've always loved striking a gong.

Ah, these are mine.

Come on, come on. Go back to work.

Now we're even.

It was just two drunks.

You can return to your tables.

You can return to your tables.
The roulette game will resume.

Place your bets, gentlemen.

Believe it or not,
my dice aren't loaded.

My cards are marked.

But I didn't use them to cheat.

I played a clean game.

- Just turn over the card.
- What card?

The explanation is under there.

Get up!

I obviously owe you my life.

Does Confucius
say anything about that?

The wise man says,

"The cat who saved the mouse
from the tiger's claws was hungry."

- The tiger was hungry too.
- Right.

You know what you have to fetch.

Now the hyena will tell us
all about the tiger.

This is a Malay boot.

It's the kind of footwear
you can bear for only a few minutes,

then it lames you
for the rest of your life.

Send him away. He doesn't know
half the stuff I'm about to tell you.

This may surprise you,
but all this is to do with that land.

Shall we trim the mustache?

Better not.
There's too much mayhem in your shop.

Can't you imagine
why I called for you?

I never imagine anything,
out of principle.

I owe you an apology, sir.

I made a mistake
and wish to make up for it.

I'm referring to that letter
of credit Lee Tse Tung showed me.

- It was yours, wasn't it?
- Yes.

I refused to exchange it
because I thought it was fake.

But I made a mistake.

I'm willing to pay you now.

I'd like to know your conditions.

I only have one,

that you leave Indian Creek
the moment I've paid you.

Now you're the one
who's made a mistake.

This isn't the same letter.

What makes you think that?

The amount.

This says $100,000.

The Chinese man showed me
a different letter.

That's the one I mean.
It was for $20,000.

You mean that one was legitimate
and this one's a fake?

Of course not.

It's just that, you see,

my bank doesn't have that amount
at its disposal.

Sir, this letter is as fake
as the other one.

Just so you know, the Chinese man
exchanged that one for me,

on condition I stayed
in Indian Creek.

In that case,
we have nothing further to discuss.

No, there is one more thing.

But...

the Bible will tell you.

"Who chases gold will be its victim.

Many have been ruined
by their thirst for gold."

Look at this.

It seems that the Bible
has given me a warning.

That man frightens me.

Don't pretend.
He frightens you both too.

Did our sheriff
put such nonsense into your head?

I'm not scared,
but I'm not crazy either.

You're crazy if you think you can
get rid of him with money.

Did he accept? Answer me!

- His price was too high.
- You should have paid him.

- I should have paid Benson, too.
- Benson wasn't Sartana.

He was a poor devil.
Dealing with him was easy.

You paid him with lead. It was easy.

But it won't be the same
with Sartana, no, no.

So many people tried,
and what became of them?

Red, Colorado, all the rest...

Yes, yes,
of course Sartana frightens me!

He's smarter than us. How did he
find out there was gold there?

Enough! From now on, the two of us
want out of this whole business!

I no longer care. We want out!

Stop. I forbid you.

You're in no position
to forbid me anything.

Too many people have died.

You forced me to kill Blackie.
You forced me to kill Piggot.

And all for nothing. But I've had
enough of killing people.

Stop it!

Don't become hysterical too, Sheriff.

I think you're both
pathetic enough as it is.

What useless accomplices you are.

What useless accomplices
I chose for myself.

Listen carefully now.

Up until now,
Sartana has just been lucky.

Whereas all you've done
is show your incompetence.

I'll tell you how to get rid of
that bastard once and for all.

And you'll be sorry
if you fail this time.

- You'll go fetch Piggot's brothers.
- Piggot's brothers?

And you'll tell them
that Sartana killed their brother.

And they'll avenge him.

Sartana!

Sartana!

We're Piggot's brothers.

May God rest his soul.

- Where's Sartana?
- He's not here.

You're wasting your time.

Where's his room?

It's your funeral.

You, stay here.

The horses!

Ralph! Jim! Frank!

They've lied to you.

I didn't kill your brother.

Ralph! Ralph!

Sartana, where are you, you bastard?

Careful!

Calm down, Ralph,
or we'll end up shooting each other.

That's a really good idea.

Say hi to your brother for me.

But there are four bodies.

Why are you giving me $100?

$20 for an extra coffin.

- It'll be a gift.
- A gift?

Yes, but don't make me look bad.

Make it a nice coffin,
with adornments and studs.

- In red mahogany.
- Yes.

Lined with silk.

I have just what you need.

It's not for me.

The undertaker said
it was a gift for Mr. Hoffman.

Why did you have to bring it in here?

He's tired of buying coffins
for puppets.

That's what he wrote.

But it won't be as easy
to bury the puppeteers.

Speak for yourself.
We're no longer partners.

Since when?

From now on.

I came here
so you'd hand over my share.

Right now. Immediately.

What's up?
Do you want to run away, Sheriff?

Why would you want to do that?

After all,
Sartana sent the coffin to me.

Yes, you're right,
but I could end up inside it.

So many mistakes are made.

- It wouldn't really be a mistake.
- What do you mean?

Nothing, nothing. You're right.

It's much better
not to run such a risk.

You're a coward,
but a forward-thinking one.

No, I don't keep weapons in the safe.

Here are all our business accounts.

I've noted down every last cent.
I knew this time would come.

Yes, just as I was saying.

It had to happen sooner or later.

Miss Jasmine Benson?

She left town.

Are you quite sure?

I am.

She said she was disgusted
by the violence around here,

so she went back to Wichita.

Well, my dear Jasmine?

I never imagined
you'd do business this way.

Can't you see I'm acting
in your best interests?

All I can see
is that I'm your prisoner.

Prisoner? What an ugly word.

I'm just keeping you away
from all those crooks.

Sign the bill of sale.

Sign it and you'll be free to go.

But not a moment sooner.

You don't realize the risks
you're running by owning that land.

I won't allow what happened
to your uncle to happen to you.

Is it really that dangerous
to own a fistful of sand?

Not for you,
because you're safe in my house.

Trust me.

You can ponder this decision
for as long as you like.

And if someone tries to harm you,

they'll regret it.

You usually come in from the window.

There were fewer people
guarding the door.

You must get out of here.
There's not a minute to lose.

But be careful. Your path will only
be clear after the sixth gunshot.

It's nothing. He's resting.

Go that way.

At the end of the corridor, there's
a door that leads out the back.

Wait for the moment I mentioned
before going out.

- Will you come with me?
- No.

I must bid your farewells
to the master of the house.

- Who's shooting?
- It's coming from the house.

What's going on?

- What's going on?
- Let's go see.

What a fantastic job,
you bunch of idiots!

We just followed your orders.

I never told you
to be played for fools.

They can't have gone far. I'll go
to the stables. Search the garden.

Boss.

Stop! Don't touch your gun.

If you're planning to chase someone,
you're a bit late.

The main thing
is that you got here on time.

Frisk him.

Leave us.

I must have a private conversation
with this gentleman.

Ah, one more thing.

If you hear shots, ignore them.

Would you be kind enough
to move that screen aside?

As you can see,
I put your gift to good use.

He was a scoundrel.

On this we've fully agreed.

Benson's death
was entirely his doing.

I doubt that.

You're right. It's not true.

But that's what I'll say
at the trial.

Just as I'll say that you,
having discovered his crime,

decided to avenge Benson,
because he was your friend.

So I killed the sheriff.

No, I'll say he was faster
and shot you first,

so I killed him.

The things one has to hear...

These things happen.

See, the sheriff killed you,
but he hadn't reckoned with me.

After all, I was Benson's friend too.

You'd decided to avenge Benson
and I avenged you.

- That's why I killed him.
- Congratulations.

You planned it all perfectly.

May I?

Of course.

One can't refuse a cigar
to a man with one foot in the grave.

You're very shrewd, Hoffman.

But do you think you'll be believed?

- Everyone will believe me.
- If you have time to talk.

- That trick no longer works.
- You never know.

You won't shoot me.

Not to have to pick up the gun?
I'm not that lazy.

No, but you're not stupid either.

Shall we agree on the sum
we were discussing this morning?

This morning was a century ago.

I'll offer you double.
Will $200,000 be enough?

- I'm afraid not.
- Then, let's say...

No, now I see it.

You're a gambler
and I know how to stay in the game.

I'm prepared to offer you half.

Half of everything.

It sounds to me like you're bluffing.

No, I'm prepared to show my cards.

Come, come.

I had an agreement with the sheriff.
We were associates.

- A crime partnership, more like.
- In any case, we made lots of money.

It's all noted down in here.

Would you mind lifting your arm?

Wait a second.

- What are you doing?
- Checking the accounts.

Listen, you'd never understand
unless I explain.

This book is for the daily accounts.

It's not worth looking at.

The full book of accounts,

with all the details,

is locked in the safe.

Let me show it to you.

How ingenious.

- Well?
- My answer's still the same.

I won't discuss anything with you
unless Sartana is present.

Confucius says that a misunderstood
wise man is a sad wise man.

I've already explained it to you.

You don't need to discuss anything,
just sign.

I'm offering you a great price.

$10,000.

I don't need Sartana around
to refuse that kind of price.

Things won't be easy for you
without him.

There's a Chinese proverb that goes,

"The wind caresses the willow
that bends to it,

and breaks the oak that resists it."

Be careful.
I'll aim the next one at your throat.

- Confucius says...
- Stop.

Confucius has no say in this.

I'll do the talking.

If you were prepared to use
that argument,

it means your greed is boundless.

That means you deserve those lands
more than anyone else.

Now I'd force you to buy them
even if you no longer wanted them.

You too are a wise man
worthy of Confucius.

There's just one thing.

- A zero is missing here.
- $100,000?

For unproductive lands
made of nothing but sand.

You can sign now, and you can pay.

Don't worry. I'll do it.
I can count up to 100,000.

I'll join you in a minute.
I still have something to say to him.

Don't be long.

In all honesty,
do you think you've made a bad deal?

No.

That makes me feel better.

Even poor Benson would be happy
if he were here.

- Were you close friends?
- Not at all.

Someone he'd swindled
asked me to seek him out.

I wouldn't have killed him,
but I would have taught him a lesson.

That's for sure.

What are you trying to say?

That he was a swindler.

May God help his soul,

he was one of the greatest swindlers
the West has ever known.

His specialty
was selling worthless land

by leading people to believe there
were precious mineral deposits there.

- Are you... Are you saying...
- I'm not saying anything.

You're the one who always claimed
that land was nothing but desert.

And you were quite right.

Here.

This is a sample of the gold
that cost Benson his life.

- I thought you were an invalid.
- I'm just a bit lazy.

Confucius says,
"Cut the tree that gives you shade,

and the sun will return to... "

Confucius, in your position,
would save his breath.

Have a rest. You need it.

I wouldn't do that if I were you.

Why not?

Firstly, because you don't
really want to kill me.

And secondly?

Secondly,
because I won't let myself be killed.

Excuse me, master. A quick word.

While Sartana was talking to you,
Jasmine fled with all the money.

Why are you laughing?

I paid $100,000.
I'm the only one entitled to laugh.

- Would you like something to eat?
- Yes.

And feed my horse too.

Very well.

A Drambuie?

Have a drink. It'll sweeten the pill.

- That money is mine.
- Some of it is.

How much had Benson promised you?

- Half.
- That's not true.

He's never given more than 10%
to his wives, sisters and aunts.

I doubt he'd have made an exception
for a niece.

$10,000.

Which way are you going?

That way.

OK, then I'll go the other way.

Wait!

Take it. It's $10,000.

They're cut in half.
What use are they to me?

Gamblers lose money fast.

When I'm out of cash,
I'll come to you with the other half.

Wait for me.