All language subtitles for Error.in.the.Menage.2014.1080p.WEBRip.DD2.0.x264-BTW

(engine revs)

(brake engages)

(car door opens)

(car door slams)

(footsteps thud)

(keys jingle)

- (sighs) What are you thinking?

Goddamn it.

(breathes heavily)

You're so stupid!

(drawer slams)

Should have left it alone,

but you had to be
pushing the issue.

Tiff.

- What are you doing?

- Getting the rest of my things.

I know you don't want me here.

- Whatever gave you
that impression?

- Are you serious?

After everything that just
happened at the restaurant?

- And who do we have
to blame for that?

- (sighs) You don't
have to remind me.

That's why I'm leaving.

- [Tiffany] Do you love me?

- What?

- It's a simple question.

Do you love me?

- Of course.

I'd do anything for you.

- Anything?

- Anything.

- Okay then.

That's all I wanted to know.

So I've come to understand
that relationships

are all about give and take,

and I know I've been
unfair to you, Nick,

and that's why you
did what you did.

Shh, it's okay.

You're the one who
deserves the apology.

And I think I know how
to make it up to you.

(door creaks open)

- Hey, Nick.

- Why is she here?

- [Tiffany] Oh,
we think you know.

- Like.

(handcuffs clank)

I thought about this
for the longest time.

I never actually
thought it would happen.

(belt buckle clicks)

- [Tiffany] God,
Nick, you're shaking.

(heartbeat quickens)

It's like our first time.

(Nick pants breathlessly)

Are you nervous?

(Nick gasps)

What, what's going on?

You okay?

Baby? Nick?

Baby, don't do this to me.

Nick, are you okay?

Nick?

Nick!

- [Woman In Red] Shit.

- Why are you just
standing there?!

Help me!

Nick, breathe.

Breathe, Nick,

come on, baby.

Nick?

Nick!

(Nick gasps raggedly)

(fist thuds)
(gags)

- Why the hell did
you just do that?

(heartbeat racing)

- He's diabetic.

I-I thought he needed
his insulin shot.

- His insulin shot
isn't going to stop him

from having a heart attack!

(choking gasps)

(heartbeat ceases)

- Maybe it just takes a while
for the medicine to kick in.

- It doesn't work
like that, moron!

Where's my purse,
I need my phone!

- He could be faking it.

He was always
doing that with me.

(blows raspberry)

(fist with syringe thuds)

(fist with syringe thuds)

(fist with syringe thuds)
(hysterical breathing)

- Are you crazy?

Stop!

- (gasps) He's dead.

(Tiffany sniffles)

He's really dead.

(Tiffany sniffles)

Who are you calling?

- The police.

- You can't do that!
(phone smashes)

- [Tiffany] My phone!

- The police are the last
people we want to call.

- What are we going
to do about this?

- Fuck your phone!

You can't call the police!

We'll go to jail for sure!

I need a fucking cigarette.

- How do you figure that?

We have nothing to hide.

We'll tell 'em the truth.

- Just think about
it for a minute.

(lighter flicks)

He's already been
dead a little while.

They'll wonder why
we didn't call them

in the first place.

Plus, they'll know that
we tampered with the body.

- If you hadn't gone
and tenderized his chest

we might have been fine.

- Never mind that.

You're an accomplice now.

And we need to figure out
what to do with his body.

(tense electronic music)

How do you feel about
chopping him up?

- [Tiffany] Are you serious?

- Sure, yeah.

(cleaver shings)
(tense instrumental music)

We'd chop him into
little chunks,

and either A, put
him into garbage bags

or B, feed him to
some wild animals.

Personally, I'd go with B.

- [Tiffany] That's disgusting.

- (sighs) It's a
little inhumane sure,

but they're less likely
to find a trace that way.

- (sighs) I-I can't do it.

- We could dump
him in the ocean.

- [Tiffany] Do you have a boat?

- [Woman In Red] No,
I was hoping you did.

- [Tiffany] I wish.

Heard they're a pain in the
ass to keep up with anyway.

- Yeah, there's a lot
of maintenance required,

that's for sure.

What if,

we burn down the house,

(gas splashes)

make it look like an accident.

(match flares)

- We're not burning
down my house.

Hey, speaking of which,
put out that cigarette.

You're giving me
a damn headache.

What if we just leave him and
let someone else find him?

- Because that doesn't
make any sense?

Why wouldn't you be
the one to find him

in your own home?

Besides, do you know
how cruel that sounds?

Just leave him here to rot
and stink up the neighborhood?

(scoffs) You may not have
morals, Tiffany, but I do.

- Okay, fine!

Do you have any other ideas
then since you're the expert?

- (sighs) No.

But I know someone who does.

Don't even think about grabbing
this out of my hand, either.

I just got it.

(phone boops)

Evee, where can I
hide a dead body?

- You've got to be kidding me.

(phone boops)

- [Voiceover] What kind of
place are you looking for?

Reservoirs?

Dumps?

Cremation services?

Swamps, metal foundries,
funeral services, or mines?

(woman in red chuckles)
(phone boops)

- You know, none of this
shit would have happened

if it weren't for you.

- And if weren't for me, we'd
both still be living a lie.

- (scoffs) I think I
would have preferred it.

- Oh, stop complaining.

You thought it was
a good idea too.

- And it was up until recently.

But my point is, none of
this shit would have happened

if you hadn't walked
through that door

with that dumb-lookin'
grin on your face.

- [Tiffany] Bald pussy, please.

- One bald?

Are you sure?

- [Tiffany] (laughs)
I know what I want.

- Wow, okay, one bald comin' up.

- Excuse me?

What exactly is in a
bald pussy? (chuckles)

- Ah, it's melon
liqueur, lime juice,

lime vodka, triple sec,
blueberry schnapps,

and a slash of 7-Up.
(ice rattles)

- Oh.

(Tiffany chuckles)

- So how have you been, Tiffany?

- Good.

Enjoying a bit of me time now

that I have the house to myself.

- Boyfriend's out of town again?

- (chuckles) Yep.

And I just wrapped
a major project,

so I finally have some
time to clear my head.

A little pampering
didn't hurt either.

- Right.

- Today I had my
hair and mails done,

did some shopping,
bought this cute dress,

and then I thought, "How
can I top off the day?"

- Hm, let me guess, salmon?

- (laughs) You're
the best, Tristan.

- (laughs) Let me go
put that in right now.

- [Tiffany] Thanks.

- (chuckles) I knew you
were not going to like that.

(Tiffany chuckles)

I was surprised you ordered it.

- I don't know what I
was thinking either.

Can I send this back?

- Yeah, the usual
chardonnay instead?

- [Tiffany] Yes, thank you.

(adult alternative music)

(wine splashes)

- Have you tried the ahi?

- I have.

It's amazing.

- I'll have to try
the salmon next time.

Did you say that
had blueberry in it?

- I did.

Wanna try?

- Sure!

So, you come here often?

- (chuckles) Well, if it
was up to my boyfriend,

we'd be here every day.

- Mine's the same way.

Mmm!

Not bad.

Coincidentally, we
were sitting right here

on our very first date.

That's when I met
you, right, Tristan?

- Er, yeah.

I remember.

- First time we ate here
was at the other end

of the counter there.

Tristan, I can't believe
it's not busy right now.

Usually this place is packed.

- (sighs) It's still
early, you know, but...

I have a feeling it's gonna
be an interesting evening.

I am gonna grab some limes.

I'll be right back.

- So, what do you do?

Oh, I'm Angelica, by the way.

- Tiffany.

Nice to meet you.

I'm a graphic artist/webmaster.

- So you make logos and stuff?

- Sometimes.

The project I just wrapped
required me to develop

the layout of a children's book

and before that, I
designed an online store

that sold skater shirts,

so I do whatever.

- How 'bout yourself?

- I'm a concierge at the
Marriott near the airport.

- Hm, I bet the phones
there ring non-stop, huh?

- They do.

It gets so annoying.

But, I do get to meet
some interesting people,

like my boyfriend, for instance.

Oh, and check this out.

About five months ago,

this guy came in with
box of puppy Chihuahuas.

I bought one.

Look at that stupid face
and tell me he isn't cute.

- (chuckles) Oh my
God, he's adorable.

Well, now I have
to show you my dog.

He's more ugly-cute though.

He's a Yorkie and I
think Shih Tzu mix,

so I'm not really sure.

To me, he looks like
a frickin' Ewok.

- Oh, that is awesome!

Look at his little underbite!

- Yeah, see what I mean?

Don't let that face
fool ya though.

He's old, deaf, and dumb.

(Angelica chuckles)

Still love 'im anyway though.

- How could you not?

What gets me is
that, no matter what,

he'll still love me regardless.

I don't know what
I'd do without him.

- They're somethin'
special. (chuckles)

- Wish I could say the
same about my boyfriend.

- Guy problems?

- Not really.

It's just we haven't been
on the same page lately.

- (scoffs) I can relate.

How long have you
two been together?

- Mmm, about two months.

And you?

- [Tiffany] Almost two years.

- [Angelica] So
is your boyfriend

like a businessman or something?

- He's a construction
worker and, y'know,

it's hard to find
work around town,

so occasionally
he has to travel.

- Oh, that sucks.

- (sighs) It does.

Can definitely put stress
on the relationship.

- I know what you're
talking about.

My boyfriend is
flying out tomorrow,

and you better believe
I'm taking full advantage

of our last few hours together,

if you know what I mean.

- Girl, I don't blame you.

Oh, were you expecting him soon?

I'm not in his seat, am I?

I'll move.

- Oh, no, you're good there.

He's actually here now.

Hey, baby.

- Un-frickin'-believable!

You're supposed
to be in Michigan.

- You should be
workin' on your book.

Baby, I know this looks bad,

but I can explain, all right?

- [Tiffany] Out
of all the places

you could have taken her to,

you bring her to
our restaurant?!

- You two know each other?

- Where do you go, Nicholas?

Did you even get on the plane?

Never mind.

I answered my own question.

- [Angelica] Hold on a second.

- [Tiffany] Why couldn't you
have done it in another state?

- Because flying isn't
cheap and work's been slow.

- But I've seen the itineraries
and the work orders.

- I only let you see them
long enough before you notice

they are fake.

- Hello?!

- You made them?

- [Nick] Remember those
Photoshop lessons?

Tiffany, you gotta understand
where I'm comin' from.

Angelica means nothing to me.

She's just a fling that's
willing to do what you won't.

(smacks)

(crowd registers surprise)

(drink splashes)

(patrons applaud)

- [Voiceover] Douche!

- As mad as I was,

I felt bad when he
called you out like that.

- Wish I coulda done more.

And it was right then that I
noticed the gears turning in

your little noggin.

- Okay, whatever.

What I want to know
is what made him

think you were into it.

- I told him I kissed a
couple of my girlfriends

when I was drunk.

- [Tiffany] Well, that
didn't take much convincing.

- Wanna make out?

- No!

So what do we do with him?

- Mm, there's a huge wooded
area out to the west.

Got any shovels?

(tense instrumental music)

(lock clicks)

We should probably wait
until nighttime to do this,

don't you think?

- So we can go
out into the woods

when it's all dark and scary
and get eaten alive by bugs

and who knows what else?

(Tiffany sighs heavily)

No, thank you.

We'll do it now and
be done with it.

Damn it! (sighs)

- Wanna borrow some clothes?

- That would be nice.

- Here.

- Whose car are we taking?

- [Tiffany] We'll take his
since it's in the garage.

- I thought his was the
one in the driveway.

Huh, no sense in both
of us wasting our gas,

Did you unlock the
backseat doors?

- Yeah.

- Okay. (sighs)

You ready?

- No. (sighs deeply)

I think I'm gonna throw up.

- (sighs) Well, it looks
like I'm stronger than you,

so I'll take the upper
body, you go for the legs.

(Tiffany sighs)

(condenser clicks on)

(water drips)

(water drips)

(doorknob rattles)

- [Angelica] I can't believe
you forgot to open this door.

I'm about to bust a tit
tryin' to hold him up!

(doorknob rattles)

- [Tiffany] So dramatic.

- [Angelica] Just
get the door open!

- [Tiffany] I almost got it!

Can you relax?!

(both grunt with effort)

- Let me go first.

It'll be easier to put him in.

(both grunt with effort)

Good thing you have a garage.

It would have been weird
doing this in the driveway.

(chuckles)

Oh God.

For a construction worker, he
sure pushes something shitty.

- Yeah, he likes to run
'em into the ground.

- That's funny.

Every time I saw him, we'd
be in something different.

(grunts)

Ooh, sorry. (groans)

(grunts with effort)

(door thwacks solidly)

(door thwacks solidly)

You know, I used to be
able to lift him by myself.

I'm out of shape.

- I don't know how you can
be so nonchalant right now.

This is fucked up!

- Maybe it's a sign
from God, you know?

- [Tiffany] Don't start that.

- Why not?

It makes perfect sense.

We were the victims in all this.

Maybe he was supposed to die.

Do you ever think that
this is his punishment?

- What if it's ours?

- Somebody's.

Let's go.

He's starting to fester.

(crickets chirp)

(birds tweet)

(footsteps crunch)

- [Tiffany] You think
this is far enough?

- [Angelica] (sighs) Should be.

(body thuds)
(neck cracks loudly)

(sighs) Okay.

I'll go to the car
and get the shovels.

In the meantime, look for
a soft spot on the ground.

Okay?

- Okay.

(tense instrumental music)

(leaves crunch)

I'm so sorry, Nick.

I never meant for any
of this to happen.

(shrill static intensifies)

(abrupt silence)

- [Voiceover] Come on!

Come on, man, let's go.

(gasps with effort)

- [Tiffany] Shit.

- Is everything okay over here?

- Uh, everything's fine, sir.

My boyfriend's just
taking a nap. (chuckles)

- In the middle of the woods?

- We like to think nature
helps with the spirit.

- Looks like he lifted his
pants off just as well.

Where are they?

What's wrong with him?

Why isn't he waking up?

- (chuckles) He's
a deep sleeper.

- Are you two on
drugs or on dope?

- No, sir.

I assure you, everything's fine.

You can go ahead and leave.

We're okay.

- No.

I don't like this.

I'm callin' the police.

What's goin' on
here ain't right.

This boy needs
medical attention.

- [Tiffany] That's really
not necessary, sir.

Just leave!

- [Voiceover] 9-1-1,
what is your emergency?

- Hello?

Yes, I'd like to report an
incident here at the par--

(shovel thwacks soundly)

(dog whimpers)

- [Angelica] Get! Get!

Aaaahhhhhh!

Get!

(hikers scream)

- [Tiffany] Coming out here
at this time was a mistake.

- [Voiceover] Hello, sir?

Are you there?

We're sending someone
out to your loca--

(shovel whacks)

- What is with you and
breaking phones anyway?

- They could use the phone
to trace our location.

We have to get out
of here right now.

- What about him?

Is he okay?

- [Angelica] Tiffany.
- Not cool, not cool.

- [Angelica] You
have to calm down.

Everything's going to be okay.

- I don't wanna
kill anyone else!

You got that?!

- We're not gonna kill
anyone else, all right?

But I need you to stay focused.

We have to take both
of them with us.

- [Tiffany] Why?

If the police are coming,
let's let them deal with this!

- We can't do that.

Someone from that group saw me,

and if they find
dead bodies out here,

they're gonna pin it back on me.

And I am not taking
the fall by myself.

- I hate you right now.

- That's fine.

You'll thank me later.

- [Tiffany] My plan
was supposed to be

much simpler than this.

- [Angelica] What
did you have in mind?

(jazzy instrumental music)

- We create a
website exposing Nick

for the scumbag he is, right?

We'll tell it all.

And on the homepage,

we'll have like a huge
embarrassing photo of 'im.

- I like it.

I'll promote the
shit out of it too.

Make sure everybody sees it.

Except we have to get
like a picture of him

in his underwear or something.

He's got to look like a pervert.

- Yeah.

How do we go about that?

- Why don't you go talk to him?

- Me, go over there?

I can't do that.

- You can do whatever you want.

I think it's safe to
say you're single now.

- Well, if he's
interested, he'll come.

- Girl, you have to
seize the opportunity

when it's presented to you.

- (scoffs) That goes both ways.

- Whatever.

- I'm not gonna lie. (laughs)

I've always wondered
what it would be like

to be with a black guy.

- I'll save you the trouble.

It hurts.

I got it!

We go together and give
Nick what he wants.

- Which is?

- You occupy him while
I snap the photo.

- I like where this is going.

- And maybe you could
Photoshop it too,

like, I don't know,
put in a giant dildo

or something going up his butt.

Or, ahh, oh!

I've got handcuffs in my car.

We can make him look
like an S&M freak.

- Let's do it.

(glasses clink)

Where we going?

Hey, what do I do from here?

- I don't know!

That's what I'm
trying to figure out!

I'm sorry, I-I didn't
mean to snap at you.

I'm just annoyed
at our situation.

- (scoffs) Tell me about it.

What were you looking up?

- I was lookin' for places
we could burn the bodies,

since we couldn't bury them.

- You mean, like,
at a funeral home?

- Yeah, but less
involving, like a junkyard.

Some place with an incinerator.

It's too bad we're
not both chemists.

- "Jesse!

"Jesse, it's time to cook!"

- (together) "Jesse!"

- Yup, if I was Walter
White right now,

I would melt the bodies and
we wouldn't have a problem.

- Except you'd have lung cancer.

- Everyone's got to die
of something eventually.

Until then, I'll enjoy
life's little pleasures.

- If you say so.

Can I ask you
something personal?

- [Angelica] Sure, why not.

- When he asked you,
how'd it make you feel?

- I was definitely taken aback.

I mean, how do you answer
something like that?

In all fairness though,

I'm pretty sure everyone
has thought about it

at some point in their life.

I actually considered it,

if it meant keeping him around.

I did love him.

And who knows?

For all I know I
might-a liked it.

But to answer your question,

initially I did
feel less worthy.

What about you?

(toilet flushes)

- Notice anything
different in the garage?

(drain gurgles loudly)

Tiffany?

You gonna answer the question?

- What was that?

- I took the washer and dryer
to that recycling center

you told me about.

- Yes, I noticed.

Thank you for doing that.

Did you toss out those
crummy golf clubs too?

- Nah.

I couldn't part with them.

- How am I supposed to buy new
ones for your birthday then

if you didn't get rid of 'em?

So they're still in your trunk?

- Yeah.

You don't hear me
complaining about

your prehistoric art computer.

- (chuckles) Fair enough.

What happened to your pen?

- [Nick] I forgot to
fill the prescription.

- Oh, you should have told me.

I would have taken
care of it for you.

- Ah, it's all good.

(sighs) You wanna hear
something fucked up though?

On our way back from U-Haul,
I get pulled over by the cops

right there at the light
to turn on our street.

- Aw, that sucks.

Did you get a ticket?

- For 150 bucks.

- [Tiffany] For what?

- I have a tail
light that's out.

- [Tiffany] (scoffs)
$150 for that?

You gotta make sure
you get it fixed.

- I know.

Is that the book you're
doing illustrations for?

- Yeah.

It's really good too.

- What's it about?

- It's like a fantasy
story with elves

and demons and kingdoms all
battling against each other.

And apparently everything in
this world revolves around

some sort of spiritual triangle.

I'm hooked.

- I was already on
board as soon as

you said fantasy and demons.

And it's a kids book?

- I guess you could say
it's more for teens.

Anyway, I need to read
as much of this tonight

so I can start
sketching tomorrow.

- How many sketches do you
think you'll have to do?

- Hm, there's 24 chapters,

so I was planning on
doing at least that many.

Find out for sure
when I talk to Mel.

- Is she the author?

- Yeah, he is.

- Oh, it's a he?

- Is that a problem?

'Cause he's very insistent
that I work at his studio

for inspiration and research.

The only downside is he needs
a really quick turnaround,

so things are about to
get really crazy for me.

Not only do I first
have to provide

rough sketches and concepts,

then I have to make
full-color renderings,

and all that's due in a
little over two months.

- (scoffs) Looks like I won't
be seeing you ever again.

- Aw, come on.

It's not like that.

I know I'll be busy, but the
good news is I got another job.

- Definitely.

I know you'll create
some amazing work.

I'm just giving you a hard time.

- (chuckles) Thanks, babe.

(smooches)

- But seriously though,

the time you're
gone is gonna suck.

- (clucks tongue)
It'll be all right.

- (sighs)

Babe, can I ask you a question?

- Of course.

You can ask me
whatever you want.

As long as it doesn't
make me angry.

- In that case, I'll drop it.

- I'm kidding.

What's on your mind, Nicholas?

- (sighs) I know this is is
gonna seem pretty random,

but I've been thinkin'
about this for a long time.

We've been together
for a while now

and we talked about marriage.

The idea of a Mrs.
Sondermeyer is pretty cool.

But, I feel for us to
really move forward,

we need to explore
our inner desires

before we make a
permanent commitment.

- Nick, what the hell
are you talkin' about?

- How would you feel
about a threesome?

- (chuckles) Like,
hypothetically?

Or like it's the
end of the world

and nobody gives a
shit about anything?

- I was thinking more literal.

- You're joking.

(chuckles) Right?

- Should I be?

- You should.

How long have you been
thinking about this?

What would put the idea
into your head that

I'd be into something like that?

- I don't know.

To be perfectly honest,
I've been thinking about it

before we were even together.

- (scoffs) Well, you
should have gotten it

out of your system
before you met me then.

God, Nick, next thing
I know you'll start

wanting me to shove
things up your ass!

(scoffs) Even if
I was interested,

what were you thinking,

what, me and another
girl or another guy?

- Another girl, of course.

I can't have another
guy plowing you.

That'd be like
tainting your body.

- Oh, I get it.

It's okay for you, right?

Doesn't matter how I feel.

- Yes, it does.

I just wanted us to
experience something unique

before we settle.

- (scoffs) Damn, Nick,
you're really tryin' to

dig your own grave
here, aren't you?

- That's not what I meant.

I think what we have is great.

It's just, I think we
should try something

that we may never
get to do again.

- What we have isn't enough?

How do you see that as being
good for our relationship?

- I believe since we're being
so open with each other,

I can't see how it wouldn't
bring us closer together.

- (laughs) You're
serious right now.

You're serious, aren't you?!

- Yeah!

- (scoffs) Unbelievable.

- Where are you going?

- To the other bedroom.

I want to escape to
another world right now.

- Are you mad at me?

So then you'll sleep on it?

(horn honks loudly)

- Are ya gonna go?

I was gettin' worried
there for a minute.

- Sorry.

- I'll tell you what.

Our boy Nick sure did have
a way with words, didn't he?

Yes you did!
(pats corpse)

Yes you did!

- Could you not do that?

- What's got your
panties in a bunch?

I was just trying
to lighten the mood

while we look for a new spot.

- I think I know a
place where we can go,

and if we hurry, we can
make it before they close.

- Sweet.

(tense instrumental music)

(suspenseful instrumental music)

A recycling center.

Not bad.

- We'll see.

- Oh, that's just great.

- Doesn't look like
we'll be going in there.

- Why not?

- How are we gonna avoid him?

And look behind the booth.

- I guarantee you
that's just for show.

Look how old it is.

- You're really
willing to chance that?

- At this point, I don't
see another option.

Plus, there's no way
that camera will see them

in the backseat.

Once we get past the
guard, we'll be fine.

- Yeah, until he decides to
step away from his cubbyhole

and spots us hauling dead
bodies out of the car.

- Good point.

One of us will just have
to keep him distracted,

while the other deals
with the bodies.

- What the hell am I
supposed to say to 'im?!

- I don't know, flirt
with him or something.

- (scoffs) No way.

I'm not comfortable doing that.

- No offense, but
I'm starting to see

why Nick went looking elsewhere.

- (gasps) Bitch!

- I'm just callin'
it like I see it.

You're too uptight.

You need to embrace
your sexuality.

- It's not me.

- At this point, you
don't have another choice,

so get your sexy on!

- All right, fi--

Well, where you gonna hide them?

This place is wide open.

- [Angelica] We'll pull up
to that scrap pile over there

and just hide 'em in it.

- And what if he sees you?

- (sighs) Will you just
quit with that already?

Just focus on keeping him busy.

Now let's go before
it's too late.

(metal clangs in distance)

- What are you droppin' off?

- We've got some metal things.

- One would assume that
if you're here, toots.

Whaddya got?

- Uh, we're unloading some--

- Uh, we have a bunch of
old golf clubs in the trunk

that we're trying to get rid of.

- Pop your trunk.

(trunk hinge clicks open)

All right, ladies.

Drive your car near
that pile over there.

Be careful, okay?

If you need any
help, I'm Patrick.

- (both) Thank you!

(dramatic instrumental music)

- Quick thinking
on the golf clubs.

How you feelin'?

- You know, just because
you have fat arms

doesn't mean you're
automatically
stronger than I am.

- (sighs) Are we really gonna
argue about this right now?

- No, I got it.

Just wanted you to know that.

(car door slams)

(intense instrumental music)

Ah, excuse me, sir?

Hi.

- Yeah.

How can I help you?

- Um, I was wondering if you
by chance schedule pickups.

I have a few old appliances
I need to get rid of,

but I don't have a truck.

- Sorry, but, uh, we don't
offer those kinds of services.

Maybe, uh, I can help you with
some other kind of business?

- (chuckles) Aren't you forward.

- Yeah, that's the
way it is, sugar tits.

When I see what I
like, I go for it.

And sometimes, I win.

- Ah, that's bold.

- You bet your ass it is.

- And I like that in a man.

Is there somewhere
more private we can go

to continue this conversation?

- That's what I'm talkin' about.

Follow me, little lady.

Is, uh, your friend
gonna be okay by herself?

She can come along too.

- Ah no, she'll be fine.

This won't take long anyway.

- (groans) You tryin' to
make me fall for you, huh?

Let's go.

- Attagirl.

(tense instrumental music)

Looks like you're first, buddy.

(grunts with effort)

(door creaks)

- Make yourself comfortable.

- So you must be pretty
smart at figuring out

which types of metals
are valuable, huh?

- All metals are
precious, sweet cheeks.

- So is this just a job
for you or a hobby or...?

- It's just a job.

I'm into other things.

- Oh, yeah?

Like what?

- Necrophilia.

- What's that?

(crowbar whooshes)

(both grunt with effort)

- Argh!

Didn't I tell you

that sometimes I win?

(Tiffany coughs)

(laughs) Just don't
tell anyone I cheated.

- Maybe just a
little further back?

(Tiffany chokes and gasps)

(slicing)

- Argh!

Bitch!

Oh, God!

(groans in pain)

(suspenseful instrumental music)

- Angelica!

(quietly in distance) Angelica!

(corpse thuds)

- There we go!

Nice 'n comfy.

- Angelica!

Angelica, get the car!

(tense instrumental music)

(keys jangle)

(engine turns over)

(engine revs)

(door slams)

(Tiffany screams)
(gunshots fire)

- Fuck!

- [Tiffany] Goddamn you!

(gunshots fire)

(blood splashes)

(women scream)

(gunshots fire)

(dramatic musical sting)

(tires peal)

(knocking)

(door creaks)

- Hey.

How long were you
plannin' on stayin' up?

- I dunno.

I need to have these
drawings finished by tonight

if I'm to stay on schedule.

- Don't kill yourself over this.

- Mel's been pushing
me hard to get it done.

- No shit.

He's seen you more than I have.

You two have been
gettin' real comfortable.

- Don't even go there.

- Well, then, tell him he'll
get it when he gets it.

- It doesn't work that way.

Mel can't have the book
published if I don't finish it.

- I didn't know this
was gonna be published.

That's amazing.

- I know, that's why I
want to see it done too.

- (sighs) I understand.

I was just being selfish and
want to lay in bed with you.

It's my last night
before I leave again.

- I know.

Look, I'd like that too, and
as soon as I'm done here,

I'll meet you there, okay?

- [Nick] Yeah.

(smooches)

(door clicks closed)

(Tiffany sighs)

(tinkling instrumental music)

- (sighs) Only a few more to go.

Baby, not tonight.

I'm tired.

Come on, Nicholas,
I'm not in the mood.

It's late.

(Nick sighs)

Are you mad at me?

- Nope.

- Will you at least
look at me then?

What are you thinkin' about?

- Have you thought
about what I asked you?

(tires squeal loudly)

Why are you driving like that?!

- 'Cause there's all
these damn people

in the road jumping out at me

and cars not coming
to a complete stop

or using their
fucking turn signal!

(sighs deeply)

- Are you in a bad mood now?

I hate it when you ignore me.

Or are you just
avoiding the question?

Well, this is gonna
be a pleasant evening.

- (sighs) I don't know, Nick.

I feel uncomfortable
about the whole thing.

Can we please just
go to the restaurant

and enjoy a nice
meal before you go?

(exciting club music)

Tristan, that was incredible.

- I knew you were
gonna like that salmon.

What'd I tell ya?

How's the wine?

- Very nice.

They paired together perfectly.

- [Tristan] Perfect.

- Oh my God, that was, like,

the drunkest night of my life!

I was so shitfaced! (laughs)

- Morning!

(both laugh)

And we were all
thinking, "Boner!"

We had our own party that night.

It was so awesome.

- Can I get you
ladies something?

- Yeah, can I get a bald pussy?

(both laugh)

- What's in a bald pussy?

- Blood!

- Ugh!

You're so nasty, girl.

- I knew I was walking
into something.

- I'm sorry, but seriously,

they're super yummy. (laughs)

- They are!

- I don't get that
drink ordered too often,

so help me out.

What's in a bald pussy?

- Well, are you gonna hook it up

since I'm doing your job?

- [Tristan] Yeah.

We'll work something out.

- Okay, well then it's
blueberry schnapps,

lime juice, lime vodka, and?

- Melon liqueur, triple
sec, and a splash of 7-Up.

You got all that?

- Okay,

so blueberry schnapps,
lime juice, lime vodka,

melon liqueur,
triple sec, and 7-Up?

- Hooray!

Now we can be best friends
for the rest of the night.

- [Tristan] Whoo-hoo,
I'm so lucky!

(ladies laugh)

- Hi!
- [Party Girl] Hey!

(smooches)

- Nice to have you back.

- What'd I do?

- You couldn't have made
it any more obvious.

- They were amusing.

Besides, you were busy eating

and talking to the
bartender anyways.

- For like half a second.

- What are you being
so apprehensive?

- Really?

"Apprehensive?"

I have a lot of
things on my mind

and it's not easy for
me to sort them out.

And you're not
making it any easier.

- Well, I leave in
a few hours, so,

you'll have plenty of time then
to figure out what you need.

(sighs) Can we get
the check, please?

- Why are you being like this?

- Because I have
every right to be.

Lately you've been
so distant with me.

When was the last
time we even had sex?

- I'll admit, it's
been a while, okay,

but that's not my fault.

I've been busy with work,

and then my period started,

and you know how those get.

It's like I've been
stabbed to death.

- (groans) I don't ask for much,

but don't you think
I have needs also.

Especially considering
everything that's
happened lately--

- Excuse me.

I've been wondering, is
your last name Dutch?

Really?

Hm.

- What do you want me to say?

- [Nick] Doesn't
matter at this point.

- What's that supposed to mean?

- Come on.

Let's get out of here.

(fast-paced dance music)

- [Voiceover] To the owner
of a tan-and-white horse,

you may not park
in the turn-around.

Please circle around.

(window whirs)

- Have a safe trip.

Did you pack enough insulin?

- It's only for the weekend.

- Hey!

We may not be seeing
eye-to-eye on certain things,

but despite it all,
I still love you.

Remember that.

- I know.

I love you too.

- You better hurry
up and check in.

Your flight's gonna depart soon.

- I'll be fine.

Don't worry.

- Call me when you get there?

- Will do.

- See you soon.

- [Voiceover] Attention,
I have now achieved

a new high score in BattleFrogs.

That is all.

(dramatic instrumental music)

- Excuse you, boy!

(playful instrumental music)

- What the hell happened
back there anyway?

Tiffany?

Hey!

Where should I go?

I'm kinda lost right now.

What the fuck do I do?!

- End it.

- [Angelica] Come again?

- [Tiffany] We should die.

- Why would you say that?

It was all an
accident, remember?

It's his fault!

- It's not, it's mine.

I shouldn't have closed
myself off from him.

I should've talked it through.

- It wouldn't have
made a difference.

He's a piece of shit.

- Maybe.

I know where we
can hide the body.

- You do?

- Get in the right lane.

Keep going straight,
we're not far from it.

- (sighs) I'm sorry about
what I said earlier.

You got guts and you're
sure as hell not boring.

That jerk didn't
know what he had.

I was wrong.

You shouldn't change a
thing about yourself.

- Thanks.

Know what I realized?

- What's that?

- We could have left
his body in his car

and made it look like a suicide.

- Like the way the
gangsters do it. (chuckles)

- It's pronounced "gansta,"
mama, get it right.

- (laughs)

(police siren wails)

You have got to be joking.

- Get ready to pull over.

- [Angelica] What?!

- [Tiffany] Just do it!

(directional signal clicks)

(quiet police radio)

(traffic whizzes by)

(tense instrumental music)

- He's stepping out of the car.

- Keep calm and act
like nothing's wrong.

- Right, 'cause there's not
a dead body in the backseat!

- Shut up!

- Know why I pulled
you over tonight?

- No, officer, I don't.

- Okay, you have
a tail light out.

(Angelica chuckles nervously)

Do you have the
registration of the vehicle?

No, I-I don't.

- Okay.

Where are you girls
headed tonight?

- Home, officer.

- Okay.

All right, you guys
stay in the vehicle.

I'll be back in a minute, okay?

- He knows something's up!

Why the hell did you tell
me to pull over here?

- We're not gonna run any more.

- Fuck my life.

I cannot believe this
is happening right now.

- Ladies!

Step out of the vehicle.

Keep your hands
where I can see them.

- You wanted to know
why I brought you here?

'Cause we're gonna jump.

- Do what he says!

Get out of the car!

- [Officer #1] Don't make
this any more difficult

than it has to be.

- We'll do it together.

- This is your last warning!

Get out of the car, do it now!

- We're like those two
lesbos in that movie

where they drive off the cliff.

- Yeah, I don't think
Thelma and Louise were gay.

Fuck it.

(kisses)

- Think it'll be cold?

- I don't think
it's gonna matter.

- Ladies, come in
from the handrail!

- [Officer #2] Don't
do anything stupid!

- You know, under
different circumstances,

I think you might have
been my best friend.

- Best friends for life.

(exciting instrumental music)

(whooshing)

(gasps) I can't go
through with it!

(pants raggedly)

What are you doing?

- Nothing.

- Why aren't you in bed?

Again?

- I can't help it, all right?

I'm sorry!

- (sighs) What was it this time?

Never mind.

I don't want to know.

- [Nick] Angelica.

- My best friend, Nicholas?!

Am I not attractive to
you or something anymore?

- No, that's not it at all.

- [Tiffany] So
what's the problem?

- I just want to know, you know?

What it'd be like.

That's all.

- That's all.

You act like it's
not a big deal.

- At least I'm being
honest with you.

- [Tiffany] Oh, well I guess
I can't be completely mad

at you then, right?

- Exactly.

So, you'll give it a chance?

- No, okay.

Absolutely not!

How would you feel
if I did that to you?

- (scoffs) Come on now, Tiff.

We're just playing around here.

Don't be like that.

- Don't like it, do you?

Why don't you let
me have my way?

I want to live out
my fantasy too.

(heavy knocking)

Who in the hell can
that be at this time?

- I was just thinkin'
the same thing.

(light rapping)

(rapping intensifies)

(dramatic instrumental music)
(doorknob squeaks)

(music ends abruptly)

Can I help you?

- Yes.

Name is Peaches.

Lookin' for Tiffany.

She home?

I got somethin' for her.

There's my little cream girl.

- Hi, Peaches!

(cymbals crash dramatically)

- (pants breathlessly)

Holy shit!

- Are you all right?

- (gasps) That felt so real.

- My God, Nicholas,
you're so sweaty.

- (groans) Hey, yo baby.

You all right?

(Nick screams)

(cymbals crash dramatically)

- Behind the scenes-type shit.

- Are you crazy?!

Stop!
(Angelica sobs)

- Are you crazy?!
(Angelica sobs)

Stop!

- [Voiceover] Faster, faster!

(syringe rattles)
(man laughs)

(Angelica laughs)

- [Voiceover] No,
that's scene, let's go--

- [Voiceover] God, for a
construction worker he--

(object thuds)

- [Voiceover] Oh, cut.

- I can't.

I'm gonna drop 'im.

- [Voiceover] Celebrating...

And action!

(object bangs)

(object bangs)

(object bangs)

So you guys know where
you're dropping him off

and going and whatever?

- Are we, where is the exact
place you wanted us to put him?

- [Voiceover] Uhh,
I put a leaf down.

(group laughs)

- [Angelica] Oh yeah,
that's a great mark.

- I'd like to report an
incident here at the p--

(shovel thuds)

- I'd like to
report an incident.

Yes--
(shovel thuds)

- [Voiceover] No.

- At the p-.

- [Voiceover] No.

(Dog owner thuds to ground)

- [Voiceover] Real quick.

Yeah, I think you
killed 'im for real.

(Angelica laughs)

- I'd like to
report an incident.

Yes, well--

- [Voiceover] (mumbles)

(group laughs)

- I felt the breeze, man!

Listen, two more
whacks and that's it.

- [Voiceover] All right.

(Nick laughs)

- Sorry about the
armpits there, girl.

- Oh, it's okay.

(singsongs) * La la la la la

- [Voiceover] There we go.

Ready, down low.

- I have to explain
this to Elaine.

- [Voiceover] All
right, dead guy.

Punch it, Chewy!

(engine revs quickly)

(tires squeal)

(seat rattles)

- Geez, why are you
driving like that?!

- 'Cause there's all these
damn people in the road

jumping out at me and cars
not comin' to a complete stop

or using their
fucking turn signal!

(Nick laughs)

- [Angelica] How dare you
talk about me like that.

Pow.

(group laughs)

- Had to swing.

- [Voiceover] Now, let me
see that "oh shit" moment

where the slap is
gettin' ready to happen.

(woman gasps)

One more, oh, that one--

(group exhales)

Slap in the face.

(woman gasps)

(group laughs)

(fork clinks loudly)

- Tristan, that was incredible.

Did I throw that down?

(chuckles) I'm not--

- [Voiceover] That
was fucking awesome.

(group laughs)

(smooches out of sync)

(women laugh)

- (snickers) So awkward!

- I went in too hard!

I went in too hard!

- [Party Girl] You
took him away from me.

- I thought he was coming!

- Spray him down a
little bit, somebody?

- [Voiceover] I got this.

(Nick laughs)
- [Voiceover] Exactly.

- [Voiceover] He knows
what splooge looks like.

(squirts)

- Ugh!

- [Voiceover] Give 'im one more.

There we go.

- [Voiceover] Perfect
shot right there.

(group laughs)

(Nick pants)

- (groans) Oh,
baby, you all right?

- (groans) What's wrong, baby?

- (groans) Yo baby,
you all right?

(Nick snickers)

(group laughs)