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Transcript: spscriptorium
Sync: John Smith - forom.com
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Episode 11x11
"Imaginationland Episode II"
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I'm going out to South Park
gonna have myself a time
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Friendly faces everywhere
humble folks without temptation
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I'm goin out to south park
gonna leave my woes behind
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Ample parking day or night
people spouting howdy neighbor
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I'm heading out to south park
to see if i cant unwind
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I like girls with big fat titties
really big fat titties
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So come on out to south park
and meet some friends of mine
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Previously on Battlestar Galactica...
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What is this place?
- This is Imaginationland.
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Allah!
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We have to get out of here!
- Hold on, fellas!
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Butters!
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Terrorists have just attacked...
our imagination.
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If the terrorists blow that barrier,
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all the most evil things ever imagined
are gonna pour out!
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Allah!
- No!
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Episode II
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Butters, time for breakfast.
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Oh jeez, it was just a dream.
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Come on, Butters. Mom's cooked
waffles and nanas for you.
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Mom, Dad, I dreamt I was in Imaginationland
and terrorists attacked it.
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You are in Imaginationland.
This is a dream.
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Hey, wake up, stupid!
Come on, wake up, kid!
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No, wait! I was back home in bed!
- No! You passed out and peed your pants!
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Look! The evil of Imaginationland
is coming out!
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Oh hamburgers!
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Everyone! Fall back to the Gumdrop Forest!
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Come with me, little boy!
I'm going to get you home!
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It's Alien!
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Predator!
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Look, we already told you everything we know.
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Some guy just showed up in a big balloon
and took us into Imaginationland.
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What we want to know is how!
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We need to find a way into Imaginationland,
you've been there! How did you do it?!
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We just went on a balloon ride.
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There must have been some kind
of portal or doorway.
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Dude, we don't remember.
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Do you realize what's going on here?!
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Terrorists have attacked our imagination
and now our imaginations are running wild!
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You'd better start remembering!
- It was the Chinese, wasn't it?
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What?
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We've suspected that the Chinese government
was working on a doorway to the imagination.
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Is that where you were?!
- No.
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That's it, isn't it?! Where do the Chinese
keep this portal? How does it work?
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It it better than ours?
- Your what?
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Our portal to the imagination built as a secret
project back in 1962 to fight the Soviets-
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Tom! That's super-secret.
- Oh, I'm sorry sir.
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Wait. The U.S. Government has
a portal to the imagination?
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Aw, see? Good job, Tom! Why don't you
just tell them everything about Project X?!
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Yes sir. We built a portal to the imagination
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to use against the Russians durin
the Cold War, but we never got a-
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That was sarcasm. I was
being sarcastic, you fucking idiot?!
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Aw jeez, I'm really sorry sir.
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If you already built a doorway to
the imagination, then why do you need us?
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All right, we might as well show it to them.
Goddamnit, Tom.
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Every night, the dream is the same
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I'm on my way to visit my friend Kyle
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because we had a bet that if I could
prove leprechauns were real
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he would suck my balls
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And it turns out I was right
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Time to pay up, Kyle.
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But then...
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No!
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No!
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It's been taken from me
I have dry balls
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Balls so dry they explode like dust
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00:04:32,675 --> 00:04:37,144
You okay, kid?
- No. I've got dry balls.
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And I'm running out of time.
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00:04:51,915 --> 00:04:56,781
Ever since the Cold War, the U.S. Government
has been working on a secret project...
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to build a doorway into the imagination.
It is called "Project Imagination Doorway."
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That's not very imaginative.
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According to all the tests and the data,
the doorway should work, but it never has.
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But we're close, sir. We're real close.
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They've been saying that for
over forty years.
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You're the ones, right? The kids
who have been in the imagination.
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Ah, I guess.
- What was the sequence that got you inside?
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We know there's some kind of resonance code,
but we can't figure it out.
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00:05:29,074 --> 00:05:31,498
Look, we're sorry, you guys,
but the balloon just went up in the air
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and the dude sang a song
and we were suddenly there.
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Song? You didn't say anything
about a song before.
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What song?
- The Imagination song?
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That could be it.
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The fractal converter has never worked,
because it was waiting for a multitonal code!
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Quick boys, how does the Imagination Song go?
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Imagination.
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Imagination.
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Sir, I'm getting some electrofeedback
from the gate.
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It's weak, but it's nanoresponding
to something.
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00:06:00,112 --> 00:06:03,926
Was there more to the Imagination Song?
How does the rest of it go?
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Imagination.
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00:06:09,774 --> 00:06:11,670
No, no dude, it went up there.
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00:06:14,745 --> 00:06:16,953
Dude, we don't remember.
It was really long and stupid.
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00:06:16,968 --> 00:06:20,173
I'm just about through playing with you boys!
We're running out of time!
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00:06:20,174 --> 00:06:24,006
You have to remember that song
in its entirety!
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Mayor, what are we supposed to do?
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00:06:30,411 --> 00:06:33,650
Please, sir. I have to get home to my world.
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Oh, well. All you have to do is tap
your heels together three times.
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Really?
- No, you fucking dipshit, that was a joke!
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Mayor, what are we supposed to do,
snarf snarf?
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Get to Castle Sunshine! It's your only hope!
- Castle Sunshine?
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Through the Gumdrop Forest.
Others will be hiding there. Go, run!
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Look out for the evil characters!
They're assembling on the Yum Yum mountain!
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We are free!
Now all of Imaginationland is ours!
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Not all, foolish orc! There are still parts
of Imaginationland we don't comtrol.
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Tomorrow, we shall build our
own castle right on this spot!
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Who put you in charge, Krueger?!
I am the most evil character here!
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Nonsense!
Your evil is stale.
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I am the most evil imaginary character!
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00:07:34,455 --> 00:07:38,295
Now come on y'all. We shouldn't be fighting,
we're supposed to all be on the same side.
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Yeah. You're all right, Squirrelly Squirrel.
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Yeah!
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What evil imaginary characters are they?
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They were dreamt up by some fourth grade
kid as part of his Christmas Story.
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Now come on y'all. We can't waste time arguing,
there could still be survivors out there.
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We need to hunt them down and kill them.
- And eat their flesh!
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00:07:57,465 --> 00:08:01,311
But first we should rape them!
- How about we kill them.
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And then rape their bodies so we
can use their blood as lubricant?
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00:08:05,526 --> 00:08:08,443
Say, that's a great idea, Beary Bear.
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00:08:11,623 --> 00:08:15,597
Man, I do not want to meet the kid
that dreamt those things up.
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Look, I want some goddamn answers!
You brought my friend here to Washington!
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00:08:19,487 --> 00:08:21,332
Where is he?! What is going on?!
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00:08:21,348 --> 00:08:24,049
I'm sorry, sir.
That information is classified.
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00:08:24,081 --> 00:08:26,813
Something is going on and I have
a right to know where my friend is!
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00:08:26,829 --> 00:08:29,601
There's somebody asking a lot of
questions about what's going on.
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Let me handle this!
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I'm sorry, but there is no such thing
as Project Imagination Doorway!
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Imagination Doorway.
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00:08:38,186 --> 00:08:42,299
It was started in the Sixties as
a secret government project. Right.
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00:08:42,504 --> 00:08:45,726
Imagination...
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00:08:45,757 --> 00:08:49,380
Wait, maybe that's where he went really
flat, like that half-step key change?
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Imagination.
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00:08:51,414 --> 00:08:54,253
Right, then it was:
Imagination...
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00:08:54,254 --> 00:08:55,674
Imagination...
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00:08:55,675 --> 00:08:58,135
Imagination...
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It's open! It's open!
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Getting readings from the other side,
that's it.
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00:09:08,439 --> 00:09:11,293
We've made an opening to
our imagination, sir!
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00:09:14,289 --> 00:09:17,774
All right, that's enough! We've still
got a lot of work to do, people!
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It's time to go in and get our
imaginations under control!
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How much further to Castle Sunshine?
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00:09:28,921 --> 00:09:33,191
Snarf, I'm not sure, snarf snarf.
I've never been.
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00:09:34,545 --> 00:09:37,083
What was that?
- Over here.
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00:09:38,658 --> 00:09:41,433
Oh Christ. It's Strawberry Shortcake.
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00:09:44,130 --> 00:09:46,354
Please, let me go.
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Oh my God! Snarf.
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Now kill her!
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00:09:59,969 --> 00:10:03,866
Hang on, y'all. You can't just kill her.
That's not evil enough.
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00:10:03,897 --> 00:10:07,753
What do you mean? We cut out her eyeball.
- Yeah, that's super hardcore.
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00:10:07,785 --> 00:10:10,087
Now come on y'all.
We can do better than that.
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00:10:10,119 --> 00:10:13,695
Hey! I know! Let's all pee in
her empty eye socket!
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00:10:13,726 --> 00:10:17,132
Let's make her eat her own eyeball
and then pee in her empty eyesocket.
154
00:10:17,164 --> 00:10:23,006
How about we get someone with AIDS to pee
in her eyesocket, so she dies all slowlike?
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00:10:24,993 --> 00:10:27,295
Nobody here has AIDS!
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00:10:28,805 --> 00:10:32,321
But we've got to have AIDS before
we pee in her eyesocket!
157
00:10:32,353 --> 00:10:35,794
Now don't be down y'all. I bet we can
find some AIDS out in the forest.
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00:10:38,306 --> 00:10:40,561
Dude, run, run, run!
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00:10:48,136 --> 00:10:52,378
All right, men. We don't know what you'll
experience on the other side of this doorway,
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00:10:52,409 --> 00:10:55,233
but it will most likely be really weird.
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If you reach our imagination, you are to take
every step necessary to get it under control!
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00:11:00,280 --> 00:11:01,809
Are you ready?
- Yes sir!
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00:11:01,825 --> 00:11:03,918
Are you ready, Kurt Russell?
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00:11:03,950 --> 00:11:07,707
I don't understand why I'm here.
I'm just an actor.
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00:11:07,738 --> 00:11:10,281
Yes, but you were in that one movie
that was kinda like this.
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00:11:10,282 --> 00:11:15,787
That gives you more experience than anybody.
All right, here we go! Men! Forward!
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00:11:15,819 --> 00:11:17,965
Sir, we have a security breach!
- What?!
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00:11:17,996 --> 00:11:21,080
There's an Unauthorized Entry Alert!
It's coming from Sector Two!
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00:11:21,111 --> 00:11:23,540
Sector Two?
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00:11:25,610 --> 00:11:27,329
Cartman?
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00:11:28,329 --> 00:11:31,459
Hello Kyle! Thought you could get
out of your responsibilities, huh?!
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00:11:31,474 --> 00:11:32,577
Who the hell are you?!
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00:11:32,578 --> 00:11:35,754
That kid you have made a bit that if
I could prove that I saw a leprechaun,
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00:11:35,755 --> 00:11:37,143
he would suck my balls!
175
00:11:37,167 --> 00:11:38,815
Get him out of here!
176
00:11:38,838 --> 00:11:43,736
No! Hold on a second! I have a contract
validatd by the United States court system!
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00:11:43,768 --> 00:11:45,581
Let me see that!
178
00:11:48,357 --> 00:11:51,353
Why would you agree to suck someone's balls?
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00:11:51,385 --> 00:11:53,656
I didn't think there was going to
be a goddamned leprechaun!
180
00:11:53,671 --> 00:11:57,357
All right, you two can go use the conference
room. Go on, we have work to do here.
181
00:11:57,389 --> 00:11:59,674
Well wait, I wanna see what happens here!
182
00:11:59,675 --> 00:12:03,680
You signed an agreement, kid. We don't
have time for this. Go on and do it.
183
00:12:04,658 --> 00:12:07,672
Stan?
- Dude, you did make a deal.
184
00:12:10,148 --> 00:12:12,766
The conference room is which way?
185
00:12:13,595 --> 00:12:18,909
Here we are, Kyle. You tried to bail
out on our agreement, but I found you.
186
00:12:18,941 --> 00:12:22,101
I didn't bail, I got picked up by
the governmemt!
187
00:12:22,132 --> 00:12:25,100
Well we're here now, that's all that matters.
188
00:12:25,132 --> 00:12:30,231
Care for some nuts? Oh, that's right. I guess
you'll be chock full of nuts in a few minutes.
189
00:12:30,263 --> 00:12:32,170
Cartman, do you even know what's going on?
190
00:12:32,171 --> 00:12:34,752
We went to Imaginationland,
terrorists attacked it
191
00:12:34,753 --> 00:12:37,686
and now the government is about to-
192
00:12:38,417 --> 00:12:41,759
Oh jeez, I'm sorry, Kyle. It's just that
I'm so completely bored by this story.
193
00:12:41,760 --> 00:12:44,029
See, I'm really only interested in
the part where the leprechaun was real,
194
00:12:44,030 --> 00:12:46,522
and so you have to suck my balls.
195
00:12:46,554 --> 00:12:49,037
Okay, fine. You know what?
Let's just get it over with!
196
00:12:49,069 --> 00:12:51,576
Oh no, not so fast, Kyle.
197
00:12:51,608 --> 00:12:56,263
I've waited a long time for this and I
intend to savor each and every second.
198
00:12:56,294 --> 00:12:59,616
No, I'm serious! I wanna see what's
happening downstairs, so let's just do it!
199
00:12:59,648 --> 00:13:03,444
Not just yet, Kyle. There's still
a few things I need to do.
200
00:13:03,479 --> 00:13:06,984
By the way, I should tell you that I haven't had
a chance to shower while making my way up here.
201
00:13:07,016 --> 00:13:09,905
My balls are extra vinegary.
202
00:13:10,781 --> 00:13:12,241
Just get to it already!
203
00:13:14,545 --> 00:13:16,957
Entering the portal in five seconds.
204
00:13:16,989 --> 00:13:21,465
Kurt Russell, can I get a comm check?
- Check 1, 2.
205
00:13:21,497 --> 00:13:24,433
Good luck men! Godspeed!
206
00:13:42,106 --> 00:13:45,709
What do we have?!
Kurt Russell, can you hear me?
207
00:13:45,804 --> 00:13:48,815
We're here. We're somewhere.
208
00:13:48,849 --> 00:13:52,640
They are inside the imagination, sir.
- What do you see in there?
209
00:13:52,672 --> 00:13:58,646
There's lots of big mushrooms, colorful
grass, some castles in the distance.
210
00:13:58,677 --> 00:14:02,471
Wait. Something's coming for us!
211
00:14:02,618 --> 00:14:05,713
It's coming out of the bushes and-
212
00:14:07,340 --> 00:14:13,135
Oh, it's just a cute little squirrel.
Hey, it talks. The little squirrel talks.
213
00:14:13,167 --> 00:14:17,055
Aw, an imaginary talking squirrel.
214
00:14:17,087 --> 00:14:19,991
Ask the squirrel what it knows about
the terrorist attack.
215
00:14:20,023 --> 00:14:25,921
Wait a minute. The squirrel has friends.
Why it's a whold bunch of Woodland ritters.
216
00:14:25,951 --> 00:14:27,555
Wait, Woodland critters?
217
00:14:27,556 --> 00:14:30,186
There's a talking bear and a beaver.
218
00:14:30,217 --> 00:14:35,009
They seem to be Christmas critters.
Well hello. Yes, hi.
219
00:14:35,040 --> 00:14:36,596
Get them out of there!
- What?
220
00:14:36,612 --> 00:14:40,266
Tell them to get away now!
- What's the matter?
221
00:14:40,362 --> 00:14:43,219
The cute little bear's eyes are starting
to glow red now.
222
00:14:43,251 --> 00:14:46,813
Hello there, little animals, do you
happen to know how to huh?
223
00:14:49,434 --> 00:14:51,243
Kurt Russell, what's going on?!
224
00:14:51,244 --> 00:14:55,866
They're raping me! They're raping me!
225
00:14:55,897 --> 00:14:57,562
Get out of there, Kurt Russell!
226
00:14:57,563 --> 00:15:01,959
They're raping all of us! Oh, it hurts!
227
00:15:01,991 --> 00:15:05,562
They're raping us and it hurts!
228
00:15:09,157 --> 00:15:12,554
I was thinking of using a high-speed shutter
with a low depth of field. What do you think?
229
00:15:12,570 --> 00:15:15,826
Goddamnit Cartman, will you stop
wasting time? I wanna get this over with!
230
00:15:15,858 --> 00:15:16,934
No, you're right, Kyle.
231
00:15:16,935 --> 00:15:19,602
A higher depth of field will make
sure everything stays in focus.
232
00:15:19,634 --> 00:15:21,046
There we go.
233
00:15:22,677 --> 00:15:25,128
Now, Kyle, when you're sucking my balls,
234
00:15:25,129 --> 00:15:27,607
are you gonna think about how right
I was about the leprechaun?
235
00:15:27,621 --> 00:15:31,147
Or are you just gonna try and focus on how
rough and salty my balls feel in your mouth?
236
00:15:31,177 --> 00:15:32,893
Let's just do it!
237
00:15:32,923 --> 00:15:36,064
In time, Kyle. You certainly are eager
for balls, aren't you?
238
00:15:36,080 --> 00:15:38,128
Are you ball-famished? Balls-starving?
239
00:15:38,159 --> 00:15:40,761
You see, Kyle, I wonder if at
this moment you are actually-
240
00:15:42,019 --> 00:15:46,101
Everyone to the main hall now! Go!
- No, we're not done in here yet.
241
00:15:46,133 --> 00:15:50,797
Everyone to the main hall now!
- No! Goddamnit, no!
242
00:15:53,300 --> 00:15:57,364
Boy snarf snarf, my feet
are really getting tired snarf.
243
00:15:57,395 --> 00:16:00,714
Aw, Snarf, could you maybe
like shut up for five minutes?
244
00:16:00,746 --> 00:16:03,466
Wait! There it is. We made it!
245
00:16:03,498 --> 00:16:05,514
Castle Sunshine!
246
00:16:05,546 --> 00:16:07,577
Yeah!
247
00:16:09,611 --> 00:16:10,912
Hurry! Get inside!
248
00:16:10,913 --> 00:16:13,261
The evil imaginary characters
are approaching!
249
00:16:13,262 --> 00:16:15,762
Lock down the gates!
Prepare to fire the cannons!
250
00:16:15,794 --> 00:16:18,143
Wait! Wait!
251
00:16:18,667 --> 00:16:23,475
What imaginary character are you?!
- The Lollipop King? From the Lollipop Forest?
252
00:16:23,507 --> 00:16:27,094
And I'm Snarf. Snarf, snarf snarf snarf.
253
00:16:27,126 --> 00:16:32,911
And what imaginary character are you?
- I'm not imaginary. I'm Butters.
254
00:16:32,943 --> 00:16:34,116
What's a "Butters"?
255
00:16:34,117 --> 00:16:36,966
The Mayor brought him and some
other kids into Imaginationland...
256
00:16:36,967 --> 00:16:38,792
just before the terrorist attack.
257
00:16:38,824 --> 00:16:42,839
So you came from the real world at
precisely the same time as the terrorists!
258
00:16:42,840 --> 00:16:45,333
That seems like quite a coincidence!
259
00:16:45,364 --> 00:16:48,480
Well I was just playing with my friends
and then we caught a leprechaun
260
00:16:48,481 --> 00:16:51,390
and then this guy-
- You caught the leprechaun? Take him!
261
00:16:51,422 --> 00:16:54,298
Perseus! He's not against us, snarf snarf!
262
00:16:58,080 --> 00:17:00,668
Talk to me! What's going on?!
263
00:17:00,699 --> 00:17:04,525
Something is coming through
the gate from the other side.
264
00:17:09,575 --> 00:17:13,782
What is it?!
- It's like a half man half bear!
265
00:17:13,813 --> 00:17:15,829
And half pig!
266
00:17:16,913 --> 00:17:22,151
Oh! No, no wait!
It's like a half bear, half manpig!
267
00:17:23,612 --> 00:17:25,256
Look out!
268
00:17:25,558 --> 00:17:30,251
No! I think it's more like a half man
and half pigbear!
269
00:17:30,282 --> 00:17:33,282
Reverse the doorway!
Send it back through!
270
00:17:35,864 --> 00:17:37,356
Kyle!
271
00:17:58,018 --> 00:18:01,914
Please! I didn't help the terrorists
get into Imaginationland! Honest!
272
00:18:01,945 --> 00:18:04,517
That is for the Council of Nine to decide!
273
00:18:04,548 --> 00:18:06,992
Don't worry, kid,
the Council of Nine consists of some
274
00:18:06,993 --> 00:18:11,898
of the most highly-regarded imaginary
characters in all Imaginationland.
275
00:18:12,088 --> 00:18:15,271
Fellow Council, these are indeed dark times.
276
00:18:15,303 --> 00:18:20,931
The evil forces amass at our gates as we
speak. Zeus believes we should evacuate.
277
00:18:20,963 --> 00:18:26,080
Yes. Their power outmatches ours. If they are
giving us a chance to leave we must take it!
278
00:18:26,096 --> 00:18:28,379
And what say you, Morpheus?
279
00:18:28,411 --> 00:18:32,683
How our we to know that they will let
us go? Their offer could be a trap.
280
00:18:32,715 --> 00:18:37,382
Perhaps we must flee to the Temple of Alderon.
Surely they wouldn't chase us there.
281
00:18:37,413 --> 00:18:40,779
No, we can't. Come on, you guys,
this is our home.
282
00:18:40,780 --> 00:18:44,097
We have to fight, to keep it the way
it was meant to be.
283
00:18:44,130 --> 00:18:47,545
I'm with Jesus. The evil characters
aren't going to just us go.
284
00:18:50,688 --> 00:18:54,784
That may be, Popeye,
but we don't have a choice!
285
00:18:55,897 --> 00:19:01,119
Forgive my intrusion, Council of Nine, but
this boy has infiltrated from the real world.
286
00:19:01,452 --> 00:19:03,135
Bring him here!
287
00:19:06,097 --> 00:19:07,621
Clear!
288
00:19:12,551 --> 00:19:15,488
I'm sorry. He's gone.
289
00:19:17,436 --> 00:19:21,880
No! Kyle can't die.
- I'm sorry, young man.
290
00:19:23,615 --> 00:19:25,281
Kyle?
291
00:19:25,758 --> 00:19:30,749
Well at least now he doesn't have
to suck anyone's balls.
292
00:19:31,783 --> 00:19:33,513
No!
293
00:19:33,544 --> 00:19:36,100
No, he has a strong heart!
He wants to live!
294
00:19:36,132 --> 00:19:38,844
Come on, Kyle! Come on, buddy!
295
00:19:40,623 --> 00:19:42,670
He's gone, little boy.
296
00:19:42,702 --> 00:19:45,197
Zap him again! Do it!
- Charging.
297
00:19:45,198 --> 00:19:46,421
Do it!
298
00:19:48,460 --> 00:19:50,984
Come on buddy.
- Clear.
299
00:19:54,236 --> 00:19:55,839
Get out of here!
300
00:19:59,250 --> 00:20:03,044
Godamnit Kyle, you never walked away
from anything in your life! Now fight!
301
00:20:03,075 --> 00:20:06,566
Fight! Fight! Right now!
302
00:20:06,598 --> 00:20:10,296
Fight! Fight!
303
00:20:19,816 --> 00:20:21,705
Give him some air.
304
00:20:21,737 --> 00:20:24,260
There, easy. Breathe easy.
305
00:20:28,463 --> 00:20:33,082
I believe this child was brought into
Imaginationland for a reason.
306
00:20:33,114 --> 00:20:35,478
Perhaps the Mayor knew something we don't.
307
00:20:35,479 --> 00:20:38,893
What are you saying, Aslan? That if we
are to take back control, we might-?
308
00:20:38,894 --> 00:20:43,066
Yes. If we are to take back
control from the evil forces,
309
00:20:43,098 --> 00:20:45,844
this little boy might be the key.
310
00:20:45,875 --> 00:20:47,469
Aw, I'm the key?
311
00:20:47,470 --> 00:20:50,538
Could I not be the key, Morpheus?
I don't wanna be the key.
312
00:20:50,570 --> 00:20:52,839
If you ever wanna see your home
again, little boy,
313
00:20:52,840 --> 00:20:54,650
you'll have to rise to this challenge.
314
00:20:54,681 --> 00:20:57,014
But I'm supposed to be at school right now.
315
00:20:57,015 --> 00:21:00,664
And instead I got Snarf and Popeye
and Luke Skywalker all pissed off.
316
00:21:00,680 --> 00:21:03,599
It is a dark time for all of us, young boy.
317
00:21:03,600 --> 00:21:09,468
But know that if you believe in yourself,
everything will turn out all right.
318
00:21:15,894 --> 00:21:20,069
Sir? Are you sure about this?
- We have no choice.
319
00:21:20,108 --> 00:21:25,568
Terrorists have attacked us where we are
most vulnerable. There's no other option.
320
00:21:25,679 --> 00:21:28,990
We have to nuke our imagination.
321
00:21:38,182 --> 00:21:39,942
Wake up, Kyle.
322
00:21:41,400 --> 00:21:43,400
To be continued...
9999
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
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