Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,700 --> 00:00:03,500
A toast to my movie opening.
2
00:00:03,600 --> 00:00:06,100
It's gonna be great to see it
in a theater full of real fans...
3
00:00:06,200 --> 00:00:08,300
...surrounded by the people
closest to me.
4
00:00:08,400 --> 00:00:09,700
Hear, hear.
5
00:00:12,700 --> 00:00:13,900
I forgot.
6
00:00:14,000 --> 00:00:16,800
I'm a recovering alcoholic.
7
00:00:18,300 --> 00:00:20,200
What can you do?
8
00:00:21,100 --> 00:00:22,400
I have some other huge news.
9
00:00:22,500 --> 00:00:26,100
Bobbie just closed a three-picture deal
with Warner Bros. For me.
10
00:00:26,100 --> 00:00:27,400
Joey, that's awesome.
11
00:00:27,500 --> 00:00:30,200
Great, Joe. How much did it cost
for you to sell your soul?
12
00:00:30,300 --> 00:00:32,700
This from a guy who just
sold his sperm for $25?
13
00:00:32,700 --> 00:00:34,600
Hey, you know,
they originally offered 20.
14
00:00:34,700 --> 00:00:36,900
You gotta be willing to walk away.
Am I right, Alex?
15
00:00:37,800 --> 00:00:40,900
I think it's great. They're gonna let him
pick out his own movie projects.
16
00:00:40,900 --> 00:00:43,400
Yeah, I get an office,
I get to hire a development executive.
17
00:00:43,500 --> 00:00:44,800
I got my own production company.
18
00:00:45,000 --> 00:00:47,100
I'm gonna call it
Yes-I-Am-a-Bird Productions.
19
00:00:47,200 --> 00:00:49,500
Because if you take all the letters
in "Joey Tribbiani"...
20
00:00:49,600 --> 00:00:51,700
...and you rearrange them,
that's what you get.
21
00:00:51,900 --> 00:00:53,000
Wait.
22
00:00:53,600 --> 00:00:57,000
No, you don't. There's no S in your name.
There's no D, there's no M.
23
00:00:59,200 --> 00:01:01,000
That's your opinion, isn't it?
24
00:01:02,300 --> 00:01:03,500
When someone calls the office...
25
00:01:03,600 --> 00:01:05,700
...my development executive's
gonna answer the phone:
26
00:01:05,700 --> 00:01:07,200
"Yes-I-Am-a-Bird Productions. "
27
00:01:10,700 --> 00:01:11,800
Why?
28
00:01:12,000 --> 00:01:14,300
Because that's my catch phrase.
I say it all the time.
29
00:01:14,400 --> 00:01:16,600
Any time I walk in or out of a room.
30
00:01:16,700 --> 00:01:18,300
- You've never said that.
- Yeah.
31
00:01:18,400 --> 00:01:20,500
- You don't...
- I've never heard that.
32
00:01:20,600 --> 00:01:23,700
Really?
Because I'm always thinking it.
33
00:01:24,600 --> 00:01:26,700
Let's get to the theater.
I hate missing previews.
34
00:01:26,800 --> 00:01:28,500
All right, here we go:
35
00:01:28,700 --> 00:01:31,200
Don't start now.
36
00:02:02,900 --> 00:02:04,000
That was... That was amazing.
37
00:02:04,100 --> 00:02:05,800
I mean, the audience
was so into it, right?
38
00:02:05,900 --> 00:02:08,200
I gotta tell you, that was one
sophisticated action movie.
39
00:02:08,200 --> 00:02:10,900
I loved the twist at the end when
the old guy gives you the locket...
40
00:02:11,000 --> 00:02:12,700
...and you learn he's your father.
41
00:02:13,500 --> 00:02:14,900
My father?
42
00:02:15,000 --> 00:02:17,000
What movie were you watching?
43
00:02:17,700 --> 00:02:20,400
It's the same guy as the photo
of your dad from the beginning.
44
00:02:21,800 --> 00:02:23,300
Oh, my God.
45
00:02:25,200 --> 00:02:26,800
- That means that his wife was...
- Yes.
46
00:02:26,900 --> 00:02:28,400
Oh, my God.
47
00:02:31,700 --> 00:02:33,200
What? No.
48
00:02:33,300 --> 00:02:34,800
Yeah, no.
49
00:02:36,200 --> 00:02:38,500
This new job at the mall.
I gotta pick up an extra shift.
50
00:02:38,600 --> 00:02:40,300
My new boss has it in for me.
51
00:02:40,400 --> 00:02:43,400
- Oh, what's he mad about this time?
- I blew off work to see this movie.
52
00:02:43,400 --> 00:02:44,800
Jimmy, you didn't have to do that.
53
00:02:44,800 --> 00:02:46,700
Not your movie.
I saw Capote this afternoon.
54
00:02:50,000 --> 00:02:53,600
Poor Jimmy. He's so brilliant but
he keeps getting stuck in stupid jobs...
55
00:02:53,700 --> 00:02:55,700
...and screwing up
because he's miserable there.
56
00:02:56,400 --> 00:02:58,000
Wait a second.
57
00:02:58,200 --> 00:02:59,400
I should hire him.
58
00:02:59,500 --> 00:03:02,000
I love Jimmy.
He should be my development exec.
59
00:03:02,100 --> 00:03:05,600
He's the smartest guy I know.
He's a genius when it comes to movies.
60
00:03:05,600 --> 00:03:09,200
You saw the way he figured out
the old man was my dad.
61
00:03:09,200 --> 00:03:12,100
Joey, it was you in old-man makeup.
62
00:03:22,100 --> 00:03:23,100
Hey, Jimmy.
63
00:03:23,300 --> 00:03:24,900
- How's it going, you got a sec?
- Hi, Joe.
64
00:03:25,000 --> 00:03:28,400
You come to see me or the store's
curiously nipply mannequins?
65
00:03:28,400 --> 00:03:30,100
No, no. Look, come on.
66
00:03:30,300 --> 00:03:31,400
You're wasting your time here.
67
00:03:31,500 --> 00:03:34,100
How about you come and work with me
at my production company?
68
00:03:34,200 --> 00:03:36,700
That'd be cool. I don't think
I should leave this job.
69
00:03:36,800 --> 00:03:38,400
I found I have a real knack
for retail.
70
00:03:38,500 --> 00:03:40,800
Excuse me?
How do I look in this?
71
00:03:40,900 --> 00:03:42,600
- Is it for work or leisure?
- It's for work.
72
00:03:42,700 --> 00:03:45,200
What's your job? You a fat prostitute?
73
00:03:48,400 --> 00:03:49,900
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
74
00:03:49,900 --> 00:03:51,800
Look, come on, huh?
Lt'd be fun.
75
00:03:51,900 --> 00:03:55,500
Like when we were 10, only now
it won't be weird that you have a beard.
76
00:03:55,900 --> 00:03:57,500
- You really wanna hire me?
- Yeah.
77
00:03:57,500 --> 00:04:00,000
You're someone I trust.
You're the smartest guy I know.
78
00:04:00,100 --> 00:04:01,700
I need you.
79
00:04:01,800 --> 00:04:03,500
I have to admit it sounds pretty good.
80
00:04:03,600 --> 00:04:04,800
But I don't want any charity.
81
00:04:05,000 --> 00:04:07,200
I wanna interview for the job
just like everybody else.
82
00:04:07,300 --> 00:04:08,600
- You got it.
- Okay.
83
00:04:08,700 --> 00:04:10,300
You're not wrong
about these mannequins.
84
00:04:10,300 --> 00:04:12,700
Yeah, that's an actual woman, Joe.
85
00:04:13,500 --> 00:04:17,200
Then I got some apologizing to do.
On the way in, I stuck gum on her.
86
00:04:23,900 --> 00:04:26,300
I guess I'll have to replace this.
87
00:04:29,400 --> 00:04:33,100
Oh, my God. It's happening.
88
00:04:35,100 --> 00:04:38,300
Alex, it's Joey. He's doing it.
Get over here.
89
00:04:41,300 --> 00:04:43,900
- Oh, hey, Michael.
- Hey.
90
00:04:44,500 --> 00:04:46,100
Here we go.
91
00:05:38,200 --> 00:05:41,600
If anybody wants any water, it's all set.
92
00:05:43,400 --> 00:05:46,600
That was the best one ever.
93
00:05:47,700 --> 00:05:50,700
I really needed that this morning.
I've been in kind of a funk.
94
00:05:50,800 --> 00:05:52,500
Why? What's going on?
95
00:05:53,300 --> 00:05:55,300
Dean and I broke up.
96
00:05:55,300 --> 00:05:58,400
- Oh, Alex.
- Yeah, I'm sorry.
97
00:05:58,400 --> 00:06:00,000
She's single. This is your chance.
98
00:06:00,200 --> 00:06:03,000
- Get, get, get.
- Oh, honey, tell me what happened.
99
00:06:03,000 --> 00:06:04,300
Well, it's kind of a bummer.
100
00:06:04,500 --> 00:06:08,300
But I guess it was inevitable
because he was just always so...
101
00:06:10,100 --> 00:06:15,400
- Anyway, you okay, huh? Here.
- Yeah, I will be. Oh, thanks.
102
00:06:15,300 --> 00:06:17,500
Look, I want you to know,
you need anything at all...
103
00:06:17,600 --> 00:06:19,900
...and I mean anything,
I am right here.
104
00:06:20,000 --> 00:06:21,600
I'm so glad you said that.
105
00:06:21,700 --> 00:06:23,900
I know you've been thinking
about us getting together...
106
00:06:23,900 --> 00:06:25,600
...and I've been thinking about it too...
107
00:06:25,700 --> 00:06:29,200
...but what I really need right now
is a friend so...
108
00:06:32,300 --> 00:06:35,000
- Wow. Thank you, Joey.
- Is that okay?
109
00:06:35,600 --> 00:06:36,800
- Joey, check this out.
- Yeah.
110
00:06:37,000 --> 00:06:39,300
This is a site where people rate movies
after seeing them.
111
00:06:39,300 --> 00:06:40,400
People are loving your movie.
112
00:06:40,600 --> 00:06:43,600
On a scale from one to 10,
it's getting an average rating of 9.7.
113
00:06:43,700 --> 00:06:45,800
- Wow.
- That's so exciting.
114
00:06:45,900 --> 00:06:48,100
Wait, someone gave it a zero.
115
00:06:48,200 --> 00:06:49,200
What didn't he like?
116
00:06:49,900 --> 00:06:52,100
"Joey Tribbiani is the worst actor ever. "
117
00:06:52,200 --> 00:06:53,300
Me?
118
00:06:53,400 --> 00:06:56,100
He didn't like me?
Click on that guy's link.
119
00:06:56,100 --> 00:06:58,900
He's got his own website.
It's coming up.
120
00:06:59,700 --> 00:07:03,000
"JoeyTribbianiSucks. Com"?
121
00:07:03,400 --> 00:07:06,900
That settles it. I'm getting a computer.
122
00:07:06,900 --> 00:07:08,100
Oh, my God.
123
00:07:08,200 --> 00:07:10,200
"Lame shows. Lame girlfriends. "
124
00:07:10,200 --> 00:07:11,300
What's this?
125
00:07:11,400 --> 00:07:14,100
"Joey's Confession. " Click on that.
126
00:07:14,100 --> 00:07:16,000
- I pick...
- My nose!
127
00:07:16,100 --> 00:07:17,700
- And?
- Eat it!
128
00:07:17,900 --> 00:07:20,000
- I pick...
- My nose!
129
00:07:20,100 --> 00:07:22,000
- And?
- Eat it!
130
00:07:22,500 --> 00:07:25,200
Each one of those clips
was from a different part I played.
131
00:07:25,300 --> 00:07:28,700
To put this together, he had to
watch everything I've ever done.
132
00:07:29,000 --> 00:07:31,600
We're dealing with a madman.
133
00:07:37,400 --> 00:07:38,500
Hi. Hey.
134
00:07:38,700 --> 00:07:40,700
So glad you're here.
This is gonna be great.
135
00:07:40,700 --> 00:07:43,500
Remember, I only want this job
if I can earn it, fair and square.
136
00:07:43,500 --> 00:07:45,700
Right, "fair and square. "
137
00:07:45,800 --> 00:07:47,700
Good morning, everyone.
138
00:07:50,200 --> 00:07:53,200
Oh, hi. Hey, could you wait outside
with the other candidates?
139
00:07:53,200 --> 00:07:56,000
- Just...
- No, I'm sitting in on the meetings. L...
140
00:07:56,100 --> 00:07:57,100
I'm Trent.
141
00:07:57,300 --> 00:07:58,400
From the studio.
142
00:07:58,400 --> 00:08:00,000
Senior V.P. Of Development.
143
00:08:00,400 --> 00:08:02,100
Oh, hey, great to meet you.
144
00:08:02,400 --> 00:08:04,500
We've met 30 times.
145
00:08:04,600 --> 00:08:07,300
Oh, I'm sorry.
But don't take it personally.
146
00:08:07,400 --> 00:08:10,900
Yesterday I had a meeting with a guy
who said he's like met me 29 times.
147
00:08:12,800 --> 00:08:14,000
Okay, let's get started.
148
00:08:17,900 --> 00:08:19,100
James Costa.
149
00:08:19,900 --> 00:08:21,200
- How you doing?
- Hi.
150
00:08:21,300 --> 00:08:23,100
- How you doing?
- Good.
151
00:08:24,200 --> 00:08:26,500
So tell us a little something
about yourself, Mr. Costa.
152
00:08:26,600 --> 00:08:28,200
I just moved to the West Coast.
153
00:08:28,200 --> 00:08:30,900
I'm seeking employment
in the entertainment industry.
154
00:08:30,900 --> 00:08:34,100
It would be an honor to work
at Warner Bros., with its rich pedigree...
155
00:08:34,100 --> 00:08:37,800
...of such films as Casablanca
and The Maltese Falcon.
156
00:08:38,500 --> 00:08:41,400
Okay. Your r�sum� ends
after high school.
157
00:08:41,400 --> 00:08:44,200
I'm sorry, are my papers not in order,
Herr Kommandant?
158
00:08:45,600 --> 00:08:47,700
What Trent meant
was it'd be nice to know...
159
00:08:47,800 --> 00:08:49,500
...what you've been up to since then.
160
00:08:49,600 --> 00:08:52,300
That's a fair question, Trent.
161
00:08:53,400 --> 00:08:55,100
It's been a bit of a rough ride,
you know?
162
00:08:55,200 --> 00:08:56,900
You know, there were some setbacks.
163
00:08:57,100 --> 00:08:58,500
You know...
164
00:08:58,700 --> 00:09:00,700
...mainly because Hector set me up, man!
165
00:09:03,000 --> 00:09:04,300
Okay, you know what?
166
00:09:04,400 --> 00:09:06,500
- Can you wait outside for a second?
- Yeah.
167
00:09:06,600 --> 00:09:08,300
- That would be great, Mr. Costa.
- Yeah.
168
00:09:08,600 --> 00:09:10,200
- Out of my chair!
- Okay.
169
00:09:14,200 --> 00:09:16,700
I think we found our guy.
170
00:09:21,300 --> 00:09:23,500
I hacked into JoeyTribbianiSucks. Com.
171
00:09:23,600 --> 00:09:26,100
I got the guy's address.
It is the work of one Gary Spindler.
172
00:09:26,200 --> 00:09:27,500
He lives right in L.A.
173
00:09:27,500 --> 00:09:28,700
- Really?
- Yeah.
174
00:09:28,800 --> 00:09:32,600
Know what? Maybe I'll go pay
Mr. Gary Spindler a little visit.
175
00:09:32,800 --> 00:09:36,300
Wow, Joey, I love the new office.
176
00:09:36,900 --> 00:09:40,800
It's spacious and elegantly furnished.
177
00:09:40,900 --> 00:09:43,600
But you know what you could use?
178
00:09:45,400 --> 00:09:46,900
You got one.
179
00:09:48,500 --> 00:09:49,800
- Has Jimmy shown up yet?
- Not yet.
180
00:09:50,000 --> 00:09:51,800
He was a little shaky in his interview...
181
00:09:51,900 --> 00:09:53,800
...and now he's late for his first day.
182
00:09:53,900 --> 00:09:56,200
Well, you need to set the tone
with a new employee.
183
00:09:56,300 --> 00:09:57,800
You gotta keep them in line.
184
00:09:57,900 --> 00:09:59,500
No.
185
00:10:00,500 --> 00:10:01,600
She hits you?
186
00:10:01,800 --> 00:10:04,200
It's okay. I hit her back.
187
00:10:07,100 --> 00:10:08,100
- Hey, guys.
- Hey, Jimmy.
188
00:10:08,300 --> 00:10:11,500
Jim, look, if you're gonna be
working here, you gotta be on time.
189
00:10:11,400 --> 00:10:14,100
What? I've been here since 6.
I just went out to get coffee.
190
00:10:14,200 --> 00:10:16,500
- What?
- Yeah. I finished reading these scripts.
191
00:10:16,500 --> 00:10:18,500
I found a couple that might
be good for you.
192
00:10:18,600 --> 00:10:19,600
Take a look at those.
193
00:10:19,800 --> 00:10:22,300
Read my notes. I set up meetings
with writers and directors.
194
00:10:22,300 --> 00:10:24,500
We're gonna find
something great for you.
195
00:10:26,100 --> 00:10:27,600
Yes-I-Am-a-Bird Productions.
196
00:10:30,800 --> 00:10:32,500
Okay, Trent. Yeah, pencil us in
for tomorrow.
197
00:10:32,600 --> 00:10:34,000
Okay, all right, babe.
198
00:10:34,600 --> 00:10:37,600
Jimmy. Wow, I gotta say,
I am impressed.
199
00:10:37,700 --> 00:10:39,800
This is a whole new you.
200
00:10:39,900 --> 00:10:42,800
I take this job seriously. I'm excited
about things we're gonna accomplish.
201
00:10:42,900 --> 00:10:45,000
In fact, we got a lot of work to do.
Everybody out.
202
00:10:46,500 --> 00:10:48,300
- See you.
- Hey, you guys wanna go ride bikes?
203
00:10:48,400 --> 00:10:50,900
Not you.
204
00:10:51,000 --> 00:10:53,800
Come on, Joe, stop messing around.
Let's get to work.
205
00:10:53,900 --> 00:10:55,300
You're being a little intense.
206
00:10:55,400 --> 00:10:57,400
- Oh, I'm being a little intense.
- Yeah.
207
00:10:57,400 --> 00:10:58,500
Have a seat, okay?
208
00:10:58,700 --> 00:11:00,200
This is the first job in 20 years...
209
00:11:00,300 --> 00:11:02,300
...where I haven't had to wash
or fold something...
210
00:11:02,400 --> 00:11:05,400
...or swallow something
and get on a plane, okay?
211
00:11:06,000 --> 00:11:08,800
I finally got a shot to use my brain.
To use my creativity.
212
00:11:08,800 --> 00:11:11,400
So you tell me something, all right?
Am I too intense, huh? Am I?
213
00:11:12,000 --> 00:11:15,500
Or am I an employee who cares so deeply
about Yes-I-Am-a-Bird Productions...
214
00:11:15,500 --> 00:11:17,900
...that I got it tattooed on my ass?
215
00:11:25,900 --> 00:11:27,100
- Gary Spindler?
- Yes.
216
00:11:27,200 --> 00:11:28,200
- Can I help you?
- Yeah.
217
00:11:28,400 --> 00:11:30,700
You can look me in the face
and tell me I suck.
218
00:11:31,200 --> 00:11:33,200
- Sorry, I don't know who you are.
- Oh, really?
219
00:11:33,300 --> 00:11:35,800
You don't wanna tell me that I suck?
Okay, we'll start small then.
220
00:11:35,900 --> 00:11:37,700
Why don't you tell me
about how I pick my butt?
221
00:11:37,800 --> 00:11:39,800
Or eat my boogers?
222
00:11:41,000 --> 00:11:43,800
Sir, I really don't know
what you're talking about.
223
00:11:43,900 --> 00:11:45,100
Seriously?
224
00:11:45,300 --> 00:11:47,100
Do you not run the website?
225
00:11:47,200 --> 00:11:49,200
Who's at the door, Daddy?
226
00:11:49,300 --> 00:11:51,500
- Joey Tribbiani?
- You know this man?
227
00:11:51,500 --> 00:11:54,000
Yeah, he sucks.
228
00:11:58,600 --> 00:12:02,700
So. Turns out the guy who hates me
is an 11-year-old girl.
229
00:12:02,700 --> 00:12:04,300
Really? What'd you say to her?
230
00:12:04,400 --> 00:12:06,200
I told her she should
get to know the real me.
231
00:12:06,200 --> 00:12:10,000
So I took her out for the afternoon.
I charmed the pants... I charmed her.
232
00:12:14,000 --> 00:12:15,600
Hello? Oh, hey, Jimmy.
233
00:12:15,700 --> 00:12:17,500
- I'm not here.
- Sorry, no, Joey's not here.
234
00:12:17,600 --> 00:12:19,600
It's just me and my mom.
235
00:12:21,300 --> 00:12:23,600
Striped shirt and very tight skirt.
236
00:12:24,700 --> 00:12:26,700
I'm not gonna ask her that,
but if I had to guess...
237
00:12:26,800 --> 00:12:28,400
...she probably is good to go, yeah.
238
00:12:28,500 --> 00:12:30,400
He guessed right, honey.
239
00:12:30,400 --> 00:12:32,000
Gotta go, see you later.
240
00:12:33,600 --> 00:12:35,100
- Are you avoiding Jimmy?
- Yeah.
241
00:12:35,200 --> 00:12:38,000
He is totally obsessed with this job.
242
00:12:38,100 --> 00:12:40,000
We have this general
get-to-know-you meeting...
243
00:12:40,100 --> 00:12:43,000
...with the studio this week
and he made me sit there for hours...
244
00:12:42,900 --> 00:12:45,500
...while we came up with a 10-year plan
for the company.
245
00:12:45,500 --> 00:12:47,500
- Isn't that good?
- No. It's too much.
246
00:12:47,600 --> 00:12:49,200
He says we're gonna start with movies.
247
00:12:49,400 --> 00:12:52,500
Then we gotta buy a cable network,
and cellular towers.
248
00:12:52,400 --> 00:12:55,000
I just want creative control
over my films...
249
00:12:55,000 --> 00:12:58,400
...so that I can cast women
with big bazoingas.
250
00:12:59,400 --> 00:13:01,600
- Hey, guys.
- Hey, what's going on?
251
00:13:01,600 --> 00:13:04,500
Oh, I just got back from Dean's.
Picking up all my stuff.
252
00:13:04,600 --> 00:13:06,100
Oh, I'm sorry.
253
00:13:06,100 --> 00:13:08,600
You wanna come over and watch a movie?
I could use the company.
254
00:13:08,700 --> 00:13:11,500
- Yeah, sure. Anything you need, pal.
- Okay.
255
00:13:16,100 --> 00:13:18,800
Must be hard having to be her shoulder
to cry on, huh?
256
00:13:18,900 --> 00:13:20,800
I know. It's driving me crazy.
257
00:13:20,900 --> 00:13:22,600
Hey Joey, I just checked the website.
258
00:13:22,600 --> 00:13:25,000
- That girl's attacking you more than ever.
- What?
259
00:13:25,100 --> 00:13:26,900
Yeah, look, she's got a new audio file too.
260
00:13:27,000 --> 00:13:30,000
I wanna kiss boys for money!
261
00:13:31,900 --> 00:13:34,400
I mean, she is a really good editor.
262
00:13:34,800 --> 00:13:37,900
That's not an edit.
That's the way I read the line.
263
00:13:45,500 --> 00:13:47,200
Mr. Spindler, I'm the guy
from the Internet.
264
00:13:47,300 --> 00:13:50,500
I was wondering if I could spend time
alone with your daughter.
265
00:13:50,800 --> 00:13:53,000
Kaley, Joey's here.
266
00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:57,300
You two have a great time.
I'm gonna take a walk around the block.
267
00:14:02,600 --> 00:14:03,700
What do you want?
268
00:14:03,700 --> 00:14:04,900
I saw your website.
269
00:14:05,100 --> 00:14:06,100
Pretty mean, Kaley.
270
00:14:06,200 --> 00:14:08,200
Or should I say, "Kay-Lame"?
271
00:14:08,700 --> 00:14:09,700
What are you doing?
272
00:14:09,900 --> 00:14:11,900
If you think it's so cool
to make fun of people...
273
00:14:12,000 --> 00:14:14,100
...maybe I should come down here
and make fun of you.
274
00:14:14,200 --> 00:14:16,000
Nice bedspread, Holly Hobby.
275
00:14:16,000 --> 00:14:18,100
Yeah? Well, nice braided belt.
276
00:14:19,000 --> 00:14:21,700
My mom gave me this.
277
00:14:22,100 --> 00:14:23,300
Hey, you must be Amanda.
278
00:14:23,500 --> 00:14:27,400
So, Amanda,
fart in science much?
279
00:14:28,400 --> 00:14:30,800
- Why don't you just shut up?
- You started this.
280
00:14:30,800 --> 00:14:32,200
Why do you hate me so much anyway?
281
00:14:32,300 --> 00:14:33,700
Was my movie really that bad?
282
00:14:33,800 --> 00:14:36,100
I never even saw your stupid movie.
283
00:14:36,600 --> 00:14:38,200
- You didn't?
- No.
284
00:14:38,300 --> 00:14:40,100
But Brad did.
285
00:14:40,600 --> 00:14:41,900
Who's Brad?
286
00:14:42,100 --> 00:14:43,900
Only, like, your biggest fan
in the world.
287
00:14:44,000 --> 00:14:46,000
He couldn't care less about me.
But you...
288
00:14:46,100 --> 00:14:48,400
He dresses like you.
He has your poster in his locker.
289
00:14:48,500 --> 00:14:49,700
He worships you.
290
00:14:49,800 --> 00:14:53,200
Well, tell him to get my action figure
because they're not selling so good.
291
00:14:54,100 --> 00:14:58,500
Look, every time I see your face
in a magazine, on a billboard...
292
00:14:58,600 --> 00:14:59,600
...I think of him.
293
00:14:59,700 --> 00:15:02,600
It's not enough we have to see each other
every day at school.
294
00:15:02,600 --> 00:15:05,200
And we have all the same friends.
295
00:15:05,300 --> 00:15:06,300
Friends. That's...
296
00:15:06,400 --> 00:15:09,100
That's all I am to him.
Just another friend.
297
00:15:11,100 --> 00:15:14,600
What would you say if I told you
I had the same exact problem you do?
298
00:15:14,600 --> 00:15:15,600
Yeah, right.
299
00:15:15,700 --> 00:15:17,900
Her name's Alex, okay?
She's my neighbor.
300
00:15:18,000 --> 00:15:21,800
I am crazy about her
and she just wants to be my friend.
301
00:15:21,800 --> 00:15:23,000
- Really?
- Yeah.
302
00:15:23,200 --> 00:15:25,700
So every time the phone rings,
do you hope it's gonna be her?
303
00:15:25,800 --> 00:15:27,600
- Totally.
- And do you ever forget about her...
304
00:15:27,700 --> 00:15:30,000
...and then run into her
and you're totally obsessed again?
305
00:15:30,100 --> 00:15:32,000
Oh, yeah. So I go out, have a few drinks...
306
00:15:32,000 --> 00:15:36,000
...and find a girl who looks just like her
and then I... So you're 11?
307
00:15:37,400 --> 00:15:41,300
I even made this incredible collage for him
with all these pictures we were in together.
308
00:15:41,300 --> 00:15:43,600
I gave it to him in homeroom
and he just left it there.
309
00:15:43,700 --> 00:15:45,200
Yeah.
310
00:15:45,300 --> 00:15:47,800
And a collage is like the nicest thing
you can give someone.
311
00:15:47,900 --> 00:15:50,800
Well, hey, if it makes you feel any better,
I think Brad is an idiot.
312
00:15:50,900 --> 00:15:54,100
Yeah, well, I think Alex is a jerk
and I hate her for not liking you.
313
00:15:54,600 --> 00:15:56,200
Well, thanks, Kaley.
314
00:15:56,200 --> 00:15:57,500
You're actually pretty cool.
315
00:15:58,300 --> 00:15:59,900
You are too.
316
00:16:00,000 --> 00:16:02,300
Look, I'm sorry about the stuff
I put on the website.
317
00:16:03,100 --> 00:16:04,800
That's okay.
318
00:16:07,200 --> 00:16:08,700
Hey.
319
00:16:09,000 --> 00:16:10,400
Who's up for pizza?
320
00:16:10,700 --> 00:16:12,900
I am. Yeah.
321
00:16:18,200 --> 00:16:20,200
Joe, where the hell you been?
Trent's in there.
322
00:16:20,200 --> 00:16:23,000
- Will you relax? It's gonna be fine.
- It's not gonna be fine.
323
00:16:23,000 --> 00:16:26,200
You were supposed to meet me at 4 a. m.
At Starbucks to go over ideas.
324
00:16:26,100 --> 00:16:29,700
- They're not even open at 4.
- I said I'd bring coffee.
325
00:16:31,400 --> 00:16:32,500
Great, you're here.
326
00:16:32,700 --> 00:16:34,800
- Let's begin.
- Okay.
327
00:16:36,800 --> 00:16:39,600
So. Just stopped by
to say welcome aboard.
328
00:16:39,700 --> 00:16:42,500
Great, well we're just real happy
to be here...
329
00:16:42,600 --> 00:16:43,900
If you'd met me this morning...
330
00:16:44,100 --> 00:16:46,700
...you would've known that's
the worst thing you could've said.
331
00:16:47,200 --> 00:16:49,900
- Is there something you'd like to add?
- Yes.
332
00:16:50,300 --> 00:16:51,600
How would you feel...
333
00:16:51,700 --> 00:16:56,200
...if we could make this studio
a cool $200 billion?
334
00:16:57,800 --> 00:16:59,400
How would you propose to do that?
335
00:16:59,400 --> 00:17:04,100
Here's the progression:
Synergies, branding, marketing...
336
00:17:04,100 --> 00:17:06,300
...and a democratic Iran.
337
00:17:08,200 --> 00:17:10,500
I'm sorry, that's just a little...
338
00:17:10,600 --> 00:17:14,500
Do you not know the word "crazy,"
or are you just afraid to say it?
339
00:17:14,800 --> 00:17:16,300
So this is it? This is the power play?
340
00:17:16,500 --> 00:17:19,300
This is where you take over
Yes-I-Am-a-Bird Productions?
341
00:17:19,300 --> 00:17:21,400
I am Yes-I-Am-a-Bird Productions.
342
00:17:21,500 --> 00:17:24,000
And we are supposed to make movies.
Just movies, Jim.
343
00:17:24,100 --> 00:17:26,100
Not tanks to sell to Eastern Europe.
344
00:17:26,200 --> 00:17:30,300
You know damn well the military arm
isn't operational until 2012.
345
00:17:30,300 --> 00:17:32,100
You are totally out of control.
346
00:17:32,200 --> 00:17:34,600
And you got no vision.
You got a chance to do something huge.
347
00:17:34,700 --> 00:17:37,500
- Don't you want to do something huge?
- No, I don't, Jim.
348
00:17:37,500 --> 00:17:40,100
I wanna be lazy and hang out, okay?
349
00:17:40,000 --> 00:17:41,700
I wanna waste all the studio's money...
350
00:17:41,900 --> 00:17:44,300
...on expensive lunches
and ridiculous gifts.
351
00:17:44,400 --> 00:17:47,300
I wanna squeeze this place
for as much as possible...
352
00:17:47,200 --> 00:17:49,600
...and do as little as I can get away with.
353
00:17:49,700 --> 00:17:52,600
Hey, man, don't tell Trent about this,
that guy's a real tool.
354
00:17:54,100 --> 00:17:55,700
Okay, another great meeting.
355
00:17:55,900 --> 00:17:58,400
By the way, I'm Trent.
356
00:18:01,100 --> 00:18:04,400
What? Is everybody at the studio
named Trent?
357
00:18:06,700 --> 00:18:10,700
"Hollyweird," huh?
They do not like Italians.
358
00:18:10,800 --> 00:18:12,500
I don't think that was the problem.
359
00:18:12,500 --> 00:18:15,000
Okay, look... All right, I'm gonna cut
to the chase, Jim.
360
00:18:15,100 --> 00:18:17,600
- I don't think this is working out.
- I know. We keep clashing.
361
00:18:17,600 --> 00:18:22,400
Yeah, so maybe it's time one of us left
Yes-I-Am-a-Bird Productions.
362
00:18:27,100 --> 00:18:28,900
I guess you're right. L...
363
00:18:33,800 --> 00:18:37,300
- It ain't gonna be the same without you.
- Yeah... I wasn't talking about me.
364
00:18:38,400 --> 00:18:39,900
I see. Okay.
365
00:18:40,000 --> 00:18:43,600
Jim, I'm sorry it didn't work out,
but I think this is best for our friendship.
366
00:18:43,700 --> 00:18:44,800
You're probably right.
367
00:18:45,900 --> 00:18:47,700
- All right.
- All right.
368
00:18:48,300 --> 00:18:51,700
You mind if I get that, you know,
one last time, for old times' sake?
369
00:18:51,700 --> 00:18:53,400
- Sure, yeah.
- All right.
370
00:18:54,800 --> 00:18:56,900
Yes-I-Am-a-Bird Productions.
371
00:18:58,300 --> 00:19:00,300
No, I'm sorry, we're...
372
00:19:00,400 --> 00:19:02,400
We're not gonna be able
to go there.
373
00:19:03,900 --> 00:19:05,400
Go where?
374
00:19:05,500 --> 00:19:06,500
Space, Joe.
375
00:19:06,700 --> 00:19:08,500
The final frontier.
376
00:19:12,000 --> 00:19:14,000
I wanna go to space.
377
00:19:19,000 --> 00:19:23,400
I know you've been feeling down lately,
so I have something for you.
378
00:19:27,600 --> 00:19:29,000
- It's a collage.
- Yeah.
379
00:19:29,100 --> 00:19:30,200
The theme is "Good Times. "
380
00:19:30,300 --> 00:19:32,600
I glued pictures
of the two of us together...
381
00:19:32,600 --> 00:19:34,700
...in different places
that I'd like to go with you.
382
00:19:34,800 --> 00:19:37,500
Like the Grand Canyon,
Paris, Venice...
383
00:19:37,700 --> 00:19:41,200
Where is this? We're standing
next to a giant scented candle?
384
00:19:41,200 --> 00:19:45,700
Yeah, I ran out of good pictures,
so I had to use the Pottery Barn catalog.
385
00:19:46,300 --> 00:19:49,300
Wow, us in London?
That looks like fun.
386
00:19:49,300 --> 00:19:51,700
That's a really good picture of us.
387
00:19:51,900 --> 00:19:54,100
We look really good together.
388
00:19:55,000 --> 00:19:56,800
Well, I don't know what to say.
389
00:19:56,900 --> 00:19:59,700
Joey, this is really sweet.
What made you think to do this?
390
00:19:59,800 --> 00:20:04,900
Alex, everyone knows a collage is
the nicest thing you can do for someone.
391
00:20:06,200 --> 00:20:07,300
Well, thank you.
392
00:20:07,400 --> 00:20:09,300
I really love it.
393
00:20:11,600 --> 00:20:13,700
- I'll see you later.
- Okay.
394
00:20:21,500 --> 00:20:23,400
Kaley, hey, it's Joey.
395
00:20:23,400 --> 00:20:28,100
Okay, I just gave it to her.
I think she is starting to "like me" like me.
396
00:20:29,500 --> 00:20:32,400
Okay, hey, so what happened
with Brad in school today?
397
00:20:32,400 --> 00:20:35,900
No way. He did not.
398
00:20:37,000 --> 00:20:40,500
Michael, I'm on the phone. God!
31853
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.