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In old country of Schlupsk, I am ditch digger.
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It is not always great.
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Life is difficult.
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But then one day,
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Hashem gives me a miracle.
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Her name is Sarah.
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She is strong
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and she has all her teeth, top and bottom.
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I decide at once to woo her.
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Wooing fails,
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but I am determined to win her.
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Every day, I dig twice the ditch.
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It is greatest summer of my life.
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We have so much in common.
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Her favorite color black. My favorite color black.
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Her parents murdered by Cossacks.
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My parents murdered by Cossacks.
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I notice nice little thing about her.
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She always sneeze same way.
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Four time.
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Is adorable.
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Sometimes, when we want to be alone,
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we go to very special bog.
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We tell each other all our hopes and dreams.
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Oh.
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We have wedding in front of whole town.
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Hashem blesses us.
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For a bit.
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We are attacked by Cossacks.
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Bloodthirsty, Jew-hungry,
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Russian maniacs drunk from vodka.
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Jew!
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The Cossacks destroy our whole world.
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But...
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we are the Greenbaums.
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We are strong.
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And together there is no stopping us.
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We keep fighting till we have American dream.
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All right, let's get these
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dumb Polacks outta here.
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Compared to Cossacks,
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Americans very kind.
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All right. This way, you filthy Jews. Let's go.
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I find good job in pickle factory.
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A good Jewish business.
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The foreman will not let me mix salt.
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Or sort cucumber.
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But he says I can chase rats with club
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and he will pay nickel for every ten Herschel smash.
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It is not dream job.
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But I am grateful for chance to prove my worth.
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Get your seltzer water here! Just one bright, shiny nickel.
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Some things still out of reach.
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Seltzer water. Get your seltzer water!
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Yeah, you, sir. Seltzer water today?
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It's only one bright, shiny nickel for the men.
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It's only one bright, shiny nickel for the ladies.
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But over time we work and save.
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I grant Sarah's wish.
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A beautiful Greenbaum family plot
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for us to share.
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Forever.
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Then Hashem gives us biggest miracle of all.
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So one night to Sarah
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I make this vow.
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Our child will be strong.
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And our child's child will be strong.
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Our family will prosper.
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And in 100 years,
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the Greenbaums will be powerful.
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Successful.
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The strongest in the land.
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And then one day,
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everything changed.
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Attention!
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This factory has been condemned.
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-Damn it. -Shit.
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Dude, we're never gonna find this, bro.
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No, it's definitely this way.
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Whoa.
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Let's go!
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Please! Please! Settle down.
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Essentially, the pickle brine preserved him perfectly.
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It's been 100 years, but he hasn't aged a day.
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-That's impossible. -You don't honestly expect us
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to buy that, do you?
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What's the science behind it?
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Please, let me explain.
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The scientist explains.
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His logic is good.
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It satisfies everyone.
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-Oh, yes. -It makes sense.
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-Absolutely. -Very clear.
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But...
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I'm very sad.
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The world has changed.
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Everything I know is gone. And...
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...everyone.
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I'm so sorry, Herschel.
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You will check again.
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We already checked the city records twice.
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She wasn't brined.
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She's been dead for 80 years.
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You will check again.
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We already checked.
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My Sarah is gone.
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Our child is gone.
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I have nothing.
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Then I get some great news.
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Great news, Herschel.
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It took a little bit of doing,
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but we were able to track down a living relative.
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I have family?
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Yes.
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A great-grandson.
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And, as luck would have it, he lives right here in Brooklyn
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and he's exactly the same age as you.
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And we're contacting him right now.
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Thank you.
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I am so excited I forget all my misery.
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Even though I have not met this Ben,
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I can see him in my mind.
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He will be just like how I vowed to Sarah,
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powerful.
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Successful.
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The strongest in the land.
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Oh, I'm sorry.
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Excuse me.
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Greenbaum.
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Yeah.
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Greenbaum.
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Greenbaum.
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Greenbaum.
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Greenbaum!
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Greenbaum!
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Greenbaum!
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All right!
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It must be so crazy for you.
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Very crazy.
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Crazy for me, too, man.
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Are you allowed to leave?
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Do you wanna come back to my apartment?
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-Very much. -All right. Let's go.
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Yeah, I got him. I'm his great-grandson.
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So he's gonna stay with me for a bit. Yeah. Thank you.
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Take it in.
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Cool, huh?
148
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Make way.
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It's a scooter.
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They're actually pretty fun.
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Anyway, I can't wait to show you, like, the future.
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There's so much cool shit, man. You're gonna love it.
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It's cool, man. It's a cab.
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It's gonna take us back to my apartment. Hop in.
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It's all right.
156
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Oh, yeah, crawl in.
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There you go. You got it.
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We're going to Brooklyn, please. Thank you.
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Here we are, man.
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Home, sweet home.
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Hey, check this out.
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Alexa, lights.
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Pretty cool, huh?
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All this yours?
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Yeah. I mean, I don't own it or anything like that.
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I do live here by myself. I work from home,
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though, a lot.
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It would be nice, honestly, to have someone around.
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So you can stay here as long as you want.
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I do not want to be burden to you.
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It's not a burden, Herschel. At all. I mean...
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I really never thought I would get a chance
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to meet another Greenbaum. So...
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Neither did I.
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You must be thirsty.
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I mean, you were brined for, like, a century.
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And there's salt in brine, right?
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So you must be pretty parched, to say the least.
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Can I get you something to drink?
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Macadamia milk? Or there's cashew milk.
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I got pea milk. They're milking peas now.
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They're milking everything these days, dude.
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You name it, they're milking it.
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I got mint tea. I have kombucha.
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-"Kombucha"? -Yeah.
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It's fermented... stuff. Honestly, I don't even know.
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Tastes nasty. But it's very healthy.
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-Would you like some? -Is fine.
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They inject drink into my arm in hospital.
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-I am fine. -Fair enough.
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There must be something I can get you.
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Would you like some seltzer?
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You have seltzer.
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Oh, I got seltzer for days, son.
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I got a whole seltzer machine. It's pretty cool, actually.
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Ya just fill this up there.
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That's it. You put in the cartridge.
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"Cartridge."
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And you just press that button. Makes you seltzer.
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Press button.
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Exactly. You wanna press it?
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You'll let me press seltzer button?
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Yeah. It's a pretty big deal, but we're family.
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So you can press the seltzer button.
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Knock yourself out.
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Yeah!
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There you go. You're seltzering.
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Pretty cool, huh?
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-The bubble. -So many bubbles.
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Well...
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One for you. And one for me.
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Cheers.
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L'chaim.
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Ooh!
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Yeah.
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Crazy.
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This must be very overwhelming for you.
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It's a lot. It's a little much.
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But I think you'll find there's actually, like,
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some pretty cool stuff about the future.
221
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Oh, yeah. Exactly. Not just that.
222
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Uh, I know what else you might like.
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You like music, right?
224
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Yes.
225
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Watch this.
226
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Alexa, play...
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oldies.
228
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Here's a station for you. Oldies.
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Pretty cool, huh?
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It's a stereo,
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and it plays music from the Internet.
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It comes through these speakers.
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Pretty good, huh?
234
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It's a good song.
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Here, check it, check it, check it.
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It's you. It's you singing.
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No, I'm lip-synching. Get in there.
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-Get in there, man. -It's okay.
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-It's okay. -Get in there.
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I watch you dance.
241
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I'm a very good dancer for my time.
242
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Come on. Get in there.
243
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Come on. Get in there. I know you want to.
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Yeah.
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Oh, there you go.
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Brooklyn's probably changed a lot since you last saw it,
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I would imagine.
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Good pizza, huh?
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Hey.
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They are couple?
251
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Yeah, yeah. Interracial couples
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totally cool now
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in parts of the country.
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Yeah, check it out.
255
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Twinsies.
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Hey, nice clothes. Is that vintage?
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-Good, huh? -Hmm?
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Kosher, too.
259
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This is a scooter.
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You have legs. You do not need this thing.
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That is a weirdly inappropriate thing to say.
262
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How many pairs of shoes you own?
263
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Um, like seven, maybe?
264
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Seven. How many sock?
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I have like 20, 25 pairs of socks.
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Twenty-five socks! Twenty-five.
267
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It's a lot of socks.
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Ben Greenbaum. Owner of 25 pair of sock.
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It's pretty normal for today.
270
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Tell me, what is it you do for job?
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Wait, let me guess. You're a doctor.
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No. You're a lawyer.
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No.
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Close. Freelance mobile app developer.
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What?
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It's easier if I show you.
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Here, come on.
278
00:19:47,000 --> 00:19:51,000
You're gonna think it's dope. Which means "good."
279
00:19:51,000 --> 00:19:53,000
Check it out, man.
280
00:19:53,000 --> 00:19:54,000
Go.
281
00:19:54,000 --> 00:19:58,000
A magic rectangle. You make this?
282
00:19:58,000 --> 00:20:01,000
No, I didn't invent the iPad. I wish I did, though.
283
00:20:01,000 --> 00:20:03,000
But let me ask you this,
284
00:20:03,000 --> 00:20:05,000
before people buy something
285
00:20:06,000 --> 00:20:08,000
what's something they wish they knew?
286
00:20:08,000 --> 00:20:10,000
How long has meat been dead for?
287
00:20:12,000 --> 00:20:13,000
Yeah, that.
288
00:20:13,000 --> 00:20:15,000
Also, they want to know
289
00:20:15,000 --> 00:20:18,000
whether or not the company they're buying from is ethical.
290
00:20:18,000 --> 00:20:19,000
-They do? -Yes.
291
00:20:19,000 --> 00:20:21,000
They do. It's called "conscientious shopping."
292
00:20:19,000 --> 00:20:21,000
It's very popular.
293
00:20:22,000 --> 00:20:23,000
My app makes it very easy.
294
00:20:23,000 --> 00:20:25,000
All you do is, you scan a product.
295
00:20:25,000 --> 00:20:27,000
And it tells you whether or not the company is ethical
296
00:20:27,000 --> 00:20:31,000
by analyzing its carbon footprint,
297
00:20:27,000 --> 00:20:31,000
its labor policies,
298
00:20:31,000 --> 00:20:34,000
and a bunch of other things and it gives you a score.
299
00:20:34,000 --> 00:20:36,000
Check it out.
300
00:20:42,000 --> 00:20:43,000
91.
301
00:20:43,000 --> 00:20:46,000
These kale chips are gonna be extra delicious
302
00:20:46,000 --> 00:20:48,000
because I know how ethical they are.
303
00:20:48,000 --> 00:20:49,000
Thanks to Boop Bop.
304
00:20:50,000 --> 00:20:51,000
-"Boop Bop"? -Boop Bop, yeah.
305
00:20:52,000 --> 00:20:53,000
-It's called "Boop Bop." -Why Boop Bop?
306
00:20:54,000 --> 00:20:55,000
Um...
307
00:20:55,000 --> 00:20:58,000
You know, it's kinda just like the trend,
308
00:20:55,000 --> 00:20:58,000
I guess, these days
309
00:20:58,000 --> 00:21:01,000
to give apps, like, silly names.
310
00:21:01,000 --> 00:21:04,000
You know, Venmo, Hulu, Hipmunk and...
311
00:21:07,000 --> 00:21:09,000
You know, you might think it's kinda silly.
312
00:21:09,000 --> 00:21:10,000
But I've been working on it pretty hard
313
00:21:11,000 --> 00:21:14,000
for five years now, basically.
314
00:21:14,000 --> 00:21:16,000
And once I sell this thing, I can finally, you know,
315
00:21:16,000 --> 00:21:19,000
start the next chapter, which is exciting.
316
00:21:19,000 --> 00:21:22,000
You work for five years. How come you no sell?
317
00:21:22,000 --> 00:21:24,000
It's just...
318
00:21:24,000 --> 00:21:26,000
not ready yet.
319
00:21:26,000 --> 00:21:28,000
I'm still finalizing some things.
320
00:21:28,000 --> 00:21:32,000
Just really focused on getting it right, you know?
321
00:21:28,000 --> 00:21:32,000
Making it perfect.
322
00:21:32,000 --> 00:21:36,000
I think once it's ready, though, I'll have
323
00:21:32,000 --> 00:21:36,000
a pretty easy time selling it.
324
00:21:36,000 --> 00:21:39,000
I went to school with this guy who works in venture capital.
325
00:21:39,000 --> 00:21:41,000
And I'm pretty sure he'd be into it.
326
00:21:41,000 --> 00:21:43,000
He said that they wanna hear the pitch as soon as it's done.
327
00:21:43,000 --> 00:21:45,000
But I'm still kind of noodling with the logo.
328
00:21:45,000 --> 00:21:48,000
I mean, this mustardy one has really been growing on me.
329
00:21:48,000 --> 00:21:50,000
I kinda wish it was mustardier, though.
330
00:21:51,000 --> 00:21:53,000
Is this your father?
331
00:21:53,000 --> 00:21:54,000
No, that's David Bowie.
332
00:21:55,000 --> 00:21:56,000
Is this your mother?
333
00:21:56,000 --> 00:21:58,000
No, that's also David Bowie.
334
00:21:58,000 --> 00:22:00,000
That whole poster's David Bowie.
335
00:22:05,000 --> 00:22:08,000
How come in this whole place you have so many things,
336
00:22:08,000 --> 00:22:10,000
but no pictures of family?
337
00:22:10,000 --> 00:22:12,000
I have pictures of my family.
338
00:22:12,000 --> 00:22:15,000
I just haven't really,
339
00:22:15,000 --> 00:22:18,000
you know, like, framed them and incorporated them in my...
340
00:22:19,000 --> 00:22:21,000
design.
341
00:22:21,000 --> 00:22:23,000
But I got that stuff right here.
342
00:22:49,000 --> 00:22:50,000
You kept.
343
00:22:50,000 --> 00:22:53,000
Yeah. I kept.
344
00:23:09,000 --> 00:23:10,000
Who is this?
345
00:23:11,000 --> 00:23:12,000
That's...
346
00:23:13,000 --> 00:23:14,000
your son.
347
00:23:14,000 --> 00:23:17,000
It's Mort Greenbaum.
348
00:23:20,000 --> 00:23:21,000
"Mort"?
349
00:23:26,000 --> 00:23:28,000
Sarah had son.
350
00:23:36,000 --> 00:23:38,000
How was his life?
351
00:23:38,000 --> 00:23:40,000
Was he success?
352
00:23:40,000 --> 00:23:44,000
Yeah. He was a foreman of a brick factory.
353
00:23:45,000 --> 00:23:46,000
A foreman?
354
00:23:47,000 --> 00:23:48,000
Yeah.
355
00:23:52,000 --> 00:23:53,000
Who is this?
356
00:23:53,000 --> 00:23:54,000
Uh...
357
00:23:56,000 --> 00:23:58,000
That's Mort's son.
358
00:23:58,000 --> 00:24:01,000
David Greenbaum. Your grandson.
359
00:24:02,000 --> 00:24:04,000
He was also foreman?
360
00:24:04,000 --> 00:24:06,000
He was an accountant.
361
00:24:06,000 --> 00:24:08,000
-Accountant. -Yeah.
362
00:24:09,000 --> 00:24:10,000
This his wife?
363
00:24:10,000 --> 00:24:11,000
Mm-hmm.
364
00:24:14,000 --> 00:24:18,000
Who is this very shapely young woman here?
365
00:24:19,000 --> 00:24:20,000
That's me.
366
00:24:27,000 --> 00:24:29,000
These are your parents.
367
00:24:31,000 --> 00:24:32,000
Where are they?
368
00:24:34,000 --> 00:24:35,000
They passed away.
369
00:24:37,000 --> 00:24:39,000
I'm very sorry.
370
00:24:39,000 --> 00:24:40,000
Murdered or regular?
371
00:24:41,000 --> 00:24:42,000
It was a car crash.
372
00:24:42,000 --> 00:24:44,000
So, regular.
373
00:24:44,000 --> 00:24:46,000
You will tell me everything of their death
374
00:24:46,000 --> 00:24:49,000
so I may bear witness to your grief.
375
00:24:49,000 --> 00:24:53,000
How their bodies died, their faces as the life left.
376
00:24:53,000 --> 00:24:54,000
Be very specific.
377
00:24:54,000 --> 00:24:56,000
Spare no detail.
378
00:24:56,000 --> 00:24:58,000
We will bond over our pain.
379
00:24:58,000 --> 00:24:59,000
No detail too small.
380
00:24:59,000 --> 00:25:01,000
We don't have to get into that right now.
381
00:25:01,000 --> 00:25:03,000
You wanna get outta here? Let's go to Smorgasburg.
382
00:25:03,000 --> 00:25:06,000
They have jackfruit nachos that are actually really good.
383
00:25:07,000 --> 00:25:08,000
We will go to cemetery now.
384
00:25:08,000 --> 00:25:10,000
Visit Greenbaum family grave, pay our respect to dead.
385
00:25:10,000 --> 00:25:12,000
Actually, I'm not sure...
386
00:25:12,000 --> 00:25:14,000
I don't think the cemetery's open right now.
387
00:25:14,000 --> 00:25:16,000
So we go to cemetery tomorrow.
388
00:25:16,000 --> 00:25:18,000
I think it was maybe supposed to rain.
389
00:25:18,000 --> 00:25:20,000
So I guess weather permitting.
390
00:25:20,000 --> 00:25:22,000
All right. But now we go to shul,
391
00:25:22,000 --> 00:25:24,000
we say Mourner's Kaddish, prayer for dead.
392
00:25:24,000 --> 00:25:30,000
Must properly honor memory of Sarah, Mort, your parents.
393
00:25:31,000 --> 00:25:33,000
Yeah, I'm not...
394
00:25:33,000 --> 00:25:35,000
I'm not sure that's something I want to do right now.
395
00:25:35,000 --> 00:25:39,000
But I would be happy to walk you over there.
396
00:25:39,000 --> 00:25:41,000
What is problem?
397
00:25:41,000 --> 00:25:42,000
It's not a problem.
398
00:25:42,000 --> 00:25:47,000
I guess I understand why you're a religious person.
399
00:25:47,000 --> 00:25:50,000
That makes sense for someone from your era.
400
00:25:50,000 --> 00:25:53,000
But I am not...
401
00:25:53,000 --> 00:25:54,000
I'm not very religious.
402
00:25:54,000 --> 00:25:56,000
You do not know Mourner's Kaddish?
403
00:25:59,000 --> 00:26:01,000
Not anymore, no.
404
00:26:02,000 --> 00:26:04,000
How do you grieve for dead parents
405
00:26:04,000 --> 00:26:06,000
if you do not say prayer for dead?
406
00:26:06,000 --> 00:26:08,000
I'm doing okay.
407
00:26:11,000 --> 00:26:13,000
I do not understand.
408
00:26:15,000 --> 00:26:16,000
You were raised Jew.
409
00:26:17,000 --> 00:26:17,000
Yeah.
410
00:26:17,000 --> 00:26:20,000
Are you not still Jew?
411
00:26:20,000 --> 00:26:22,000
Technically.
412
00:26:22,000 --> 00:26:24,000
I also had a Jumanji-themed bar mitzvah.
413
00:26:24,000 --> 00:26:27,000
It's not like I was that religious
414
00:26:24,000 --> 00:26:27,000
in the first place.
415
00:26:27,000 --> 00:26:30,000
Also, like, organized religion is very regressive.
416
00:27:09,000 --> 00:27:13,000
Praise Hashem, there is still beautiful Greenbaum plot.
417
00:27:13,000 --> 00:27:16,000
Very special place. Very special.
418
00:27:16,000 --> 00:27:19,000
Tell me, how high is elm tree now?
419
00:27:19,000 --> 00:27:20,000
100 feet?
420
00:27:20,000 --> 00:27:22,000
200 feet?
421
00:27:22,000 --> 00:27:26,000
Yeah. Something like that. Probably. I'm not 100% sure.
422
00:27:26,000 --> 00:27:28,000
When last time you come?
423
00:27:28,000 --> 00:27:32,000
I don't know, maybe like five years ago, or somethin'.
424
00:27:32,000 --> 00:27:34,000
So been a little while.
425
00:27:35,000 --> 00:27:36,000
Wait.
426
00:27:37,000 --> 00:27:38,000
It's this way.
427
00:27:39,000 --> 00:27:40,000
This way!
428
00:27:55,000 --> 00:27:57,000
Sweet Hashem.
429
00:28:07,000 --> 00:28:08,000
You let them put garbage.
430
00:28:10,000 --> 00:28:14,000
And you let them put huge sign block out sun and kill tree!
431
00:28:14,000 --> 00:28:16,000
Yeah, it's not on our property.
432
00:28:16,000 --> 00:28:17,000
There's nothing we can do about it.
433
00:28:25,000 --> 00:28:26,000
Sarah.
434
00:28:42,000 --> 00:28:43,000
You okay?
435
00:28:49,000 --> 00:28:51,000
We will pray.
436
00:29:18,000 --> 00:29:19,000
Hey, guys!
437
00:29:20,000 --> 00:29:22,000
Sorry, you can't be there.
438
00:29:23,000 --> 00:29:24,000
What?
439
00:29:24,000 --> 00:29:26,000
We're putting up a billboard!
440
00:29:33,000 --> 00:29:34,000
What it say?
441
00:29:35,000 --> 00:29:37,000
It's an ad for vanilla-flavored vodka.
442
00:29:39,000 --> 00:29:41,000
Vanilla-flavored...
443
00:29:43,000 --> 00:29:44,000
...vodka?
444
00:29:48,000 --> 00:29:49,000
Cossacks.
445
00:29:51,000 --> 00:29:52,000
Cossack!
446
00:29:54,000 --> 00:29:56,000
Hershel, what are you doin', man?
447
00:29:58,000 --> 00:30:01,000
You will take down vanilla vodka...
448
00:30:02,000 --> 00:30:03,000
or I will do violence.
449
00:30:04,000 --> 00:30:05,000
What?
450
00:30:05,000 --> 00:30:10,000
You will take down vanilla vodka...
451
00:30:13,000 --> 00:30:14,000
or I will do violence.
452
00:30:14,000 --> 00:30:16,000
Look, buddy, I don't have time for--
453
00:30:17,000 --> 00:30:19,000
Oh, shit. No!
454
00:30:26,000 --> 00:30:28,000
-Stop! -Yes!
455
00:30:32,000 --> 00:30:33,000
Stop!
456
00:30:35,000 --> 00:30:37,000
Come on! Come on!
457
00:30:37,000 --> 00:30:39,000
Ben! Ben!
458
00:30:39,000 --> 00:30:40,000
Come on!
459
00:30:40,000 --> 00:30:42,000
You can never stop the Greenbaums!
460
00:30:42,000 --> 00:30:44,000
You will never stop the Greenbaums!
461
00:30:48,000 --> 00:30:51,000
Your payment's been processed. You're free to go.
462
00:30:52,000 --> 00:30:54,000
Fantastic.
463
00:30:55,000 --> 00:30:57,000
We must go back to grave.
464
00:30:57,000 --> 00:31:00,000
We will cut down Cossack billboard.
465
00:31:01,000 --> 00:31:02,000
Dude, if we do that,
466
00:31:02,000 --> 00:31:04,000
we're gonna go back to jail. So, no.
467
00:31:04,000 --> 00:31:08,000
Okay. We must purchase billboard from Cossack,
468
00:31:04,000 --> 00:31:08,000
which I do not like,
469
00:31:08,000 --> 00:31:10,000
and then we cut down billboard.
470
00:31:10,000 --> 00:31:12,000
First off, the Cossacks don't own it.
471
00:31:12,000 --> 00:31:15,000
Second off, it's owned by some giant billboard company.
472
00:31:12,000 --> 00:31:15,000
It costs $200,000.
473
00:31:15,000 --> 00:31:19,000
Then we buy from giant company and then we cut down billboard.
474
00:31:19,000 --> 00:31:21,000
Why are you being so difficult about this?
475
00:31:21,000 --> 00:31:22,000
I can't afford it!
476
00:31:22,000 --> 00:31:24,000
You have moneys? Your parents leave you moneys?
477
00:31:24,000 --> 00:31:25,000
I don't have $200,000.
478
00:31:25,000 --> 00:31:27,000
You have all this, so you have moneys.
479
00:31:27,000 --> 00:31:29,000
How much moneys you have?
480
00:31:29,000 --> 00:31:31,000
I have some money left, but I don't have a lot left.
481
00:31:31,000 --> 00:31:33,000
And I have a lot less now that I had to bail us
482
00:31:31,000 --> 00:31:33,000
out of jail, Herschel.
483
00:31:33,000 --> 00:31:35,000
It's not my fault!
484
00:31:35,000 --> 00:31:37,000
What is your fault is that you started a fight with
485
00:31:35,000 --> 00:31:37,000
some construction workers!
486
00:31:37,000 --> 00:31:40,000
Someone has to defend honor of family. Not you.
487
00:31:40,000 --> 00:31:42,000
And I'd be defending the honor of our family more
488
00:31:42,000 --> 00:31:46,000
if I wasn't busy trying to create a company
489
00:31:42,000 --> 00:31:46,000
and a product, man!
490
00:31:46,000 --> 00:31:49,000
You're busy? Oh, yes. Not selling Boop Bops.
491
00:31:49,000 --> 00:31:52,000
You don't understand how much pressure there is
492
00:31:49,000 --> 00:31:52,000
on this stuff. Okay?
493
00:31:52,000 --> 00:31:53,000
I'm trying to make it perfect.
494
00:31:54,000 --> 00:31:56,000
Blue. Green. Red. Who cares?
495
00:31:56,000 --> 00:31:58,000
Pick a color!
496
00:31:58,000 --> 00:32:00,000
Companies are made or broken by the color of their logo!
497
00:32:00,000 --> 00:32:02,000
Let me tell you something.
498
00:32:02,000 --> 00:32:04,000
In Schlupsk, we have saying.
499
00:32:04,000 --> 00:32:06,000
Oh, good. Yeah, what is it? I'm sure this has aged well.
500
00:32:06,000 --> 00:32:09,000
If man says he is going to throw punch,
501
00:32:09,000 --> 00:32:11,000
but he does not throw punch,
502
00:32:11,000 --> 00:32:14,000
it is because this man secretly has polio arm.
503
00:32:16,000 --> 00:32:17,000
This is you.
504
00:32:17,000 --> 00:32:19,000
You have polio arm.
505
00:32:19,000 --> 00:32:21,000
This your polio arm.
506
00:32:21,000 --> 00:32:22,000
Throw your punch!
507
00:32:22,000 --> 00:32:24,000
Do something, Ben!
508
00:32:24,000 --> 00:32:26,000
Don't just sit there, looking at Boop Bops.
509
00:32:26,000 --> 00:32:28,000
Blue, yellow, green! Who cares?
510
00:32:29,000 --> 00:32:30,000
Throw your punch!
511
00:32:30,000 --> 00:32:33,000
Okay. Fine! You know what? Fine! Fine!
512
00:32:33,000 --> 00:32:35,000
-Good. Good. Do it. -I'll email the guy.
513
00:32:35,000 --> 00:32:37,000
No choice anyway. I have no money.
514
00:32:37,000 --> 00:32:40,000
It's not ready. Logo's not right.
515
00:32:40,000 --> 00:32:43,000
Who cares about the stupid logo?
516
00:32:44,000 --> 00:32:46,000
You know they cured polio, right?
517
00:32:46,000 --> 00:32:47,000
-They did? -Yes, they did.
518
00:32:47,000 --> 00:32:50,000
A long time ago. A guy named Jonas Salk.
519
00:32:50,000 --> 00:32:51,000
Was he Jew?
520
00:32:51,000 --> 00:32:52,000
He was. Yes.
521
00:32:52,000 --> 00:32:53,000
-He was Jewish? -Yes.
522
00:32:53,000 --> 00:32:55,000
Yes! Knew it.
523
00:32:55,000 --> 00:32:56,000
Oh, yeah, big win.
524
00:32:56,000 --> 00:32:59,000
I would look at polio people and think,
525
00:32:59,000 --> 00:33:00,000
"They could fix this."
526
00:33:00,000 --> 00:33:01,000
You thought that?
527
00:33:01,000 --> 00:33:04,000
This problem not unfixable problem.
528
00:33:04,000 --> 00:33:06,000
You put a Jew on this, he will fix this.
529
00:33:07,000 --> 00:33:08,000
Very prophetic of you, Herschel.
530
00:33:08,000 --> 00:33:09,000
I was right. Very good.
531
00:33:13,000 --> 00:33:15,000
He's texting back.
532
00:33:15,000 --> 00:33:17,000
He says my idea's "straight fire."
533
00:33:17,000 --> 00:33:18,000
That's a good thing.
534
00:33:19,000 --> 00:33:22,000
He wants me to come in today and pitch my idea in person.
535
00:33:22,000 --> 00:33:23,000
He wants your Boop Bops.
536
00:33:23,000 --> 00:33:25,000
-This is a big deal, Herschel. -Yes.
537
00:33:27,000 --> 00:33:28,000
He wants my Boop Bops.
538
00:33:31,000 --> 00:33:32,000
Ben, what's up?
539
00:33:33,000 --> 00:33:34,000
Hey! How's it going, man?
540
00:33:35,000 --> 00:33:37,000
We're not gonna invest.
541
00:33:39,000 --> 00:33:41,000
-What? -Yeah. Sorry, man.
542
00:33:42,000 --> 00:33:43,000
What's the problem?
543
00:33:43,000 --> 00:33:44,000
Before you came in, we googled your name
544
00:33:45,000 --> 00:33:47,000
and the first thing that comes up is your arrest.
545
00:33:48,000 --> 00:33:49,000
Look, it's just bad optics.
546
00:33:49,000 --> 00:33:52,000
I mean, the whole app is about ethics,
547
00:33:52,000 --> 00:33:54,000
and the founder is a violent criminal.
548
00:33:54,000 --> 00:33:56,000
Like, if you Boop Bopped Boop Bop,
549
00:33:56,000 --> 00:33:59,000
you'd get a really low Boop Bop score.
550
00:33:59,000 --> 00:34:00,000
Is there anything we can do?
551
00:34:00,000 --> 00:34:02,000
Can we spin this or something like that?
552
00:34:02,000 --> 00:34:03,000
Oh, no. Definitely not.
553
00:34:03,000 --> 00:34:06,000
No one's gonna touch this, man. This is...
554
00:34:06,000 --> 00:34:07,000
This idea is dead.
555
00:34:08,000 --> 00:34:10,000
Look, consider this an opportunity.
556
00:34:10,000 --> 00:34:11,000
I mean, there's tons of other ideas.
557
00:34:11,000 --> 00:34:14,000
-How long did it take to come up with this?
558
00:34:11,000 --> 00:34:14,000
-Five years.
559
00:34:14,000 --> 00:34:16,000
Five years. That's--
560
00:34:16,000 --> 00:34:17,000
Long time.
561
00:34:17,000 --> 00:34:18,000
Yeah, that's a while.
562
00:34:18,000 --> 00:34:20,000
Sorry to disappoint you, I guess.
563
00:34:20,000 --> 00:34:24,000
Maybe you can make an app where it doesn't matter
564
00:34:20,000 --> 00:34:24,000
if the founder's a bad person.
565
00:34:24,000 --> 00:34:26,000
Like a social media thing.
566
00:34:26,000 --> 00:34:30,000
Hey. I don't know if you want my advice, man,
567
00:34:30,000 --> 00:34:34,000
but it's never too late to do things completely differently.
568
00:34:30,000 --> 00:34:34,000
You know?
569
00:34:34,000 --> 00:34:35,000
-Yeah. -Yeah.
570
00:34:36,000 --> 00:34:37,000
Take care, man.
571
00:34:37,000 --> 00:34:39,000
Call me if you got anything new.
572
00:34:55,000 --> 00:34:57,000
Did you get moneys?
573
00:34:57,000 --> 00:34:59,000
No. I didn't get moneys.
574
00:34:59,000 --> 00:35:02,000
And I'm afraid that I might never get moneys
575
00:35:02,000 --> 00:35:06,000
for my business that is based on ethics
576
00:35:06,000 --> 00:35:11,000
now that I have a criminal record for assault
577
00:35:06,000 --> 00:35:11,000
because of you!
578
00:35:14,000 --> 00:35:16,000
I was worried no one would want your Boop Bops
579
00:35:16,000 --> 00:35:19,000
because is terrible idea. So...
580
00:35:19,000 --> 00:35:21,000
I have other idea.
581
00:35:21,000 --> 00:35:24,000
We start pickle business.
582
00:35:24,000 --> 00:35:26,000
Is good business. Jewish business.
583
00:35:26,000 --> 00:35:28,000
I have knowledge of pickling.
584
00:35:28,000 --> 00:35:31,000
I was myself a pickle.
585
00:35:31,000 --> 00:35:33,000
That's a very stupid idea, Herschel.
586
00:35:34,000 --> 00:35:35,000
It will work.
587
00:35:35,000 --> 00:35:37,000
We will start pickle business.
588
00:35:38,000 --> 00:35:39,000
We will become success.
589
00:35:39,000 --> 00:35:42,000
You will finally make dead parents proud.
590
00:35:42,000 --> 00:35:44,000
Don't you talk about my parents.
591
00:35:44,000 --> 00:35:45,000
You never talk about my parents!
592
00:35:46,000 --> 00:35:49,000
You don't know anything about them!
593
00:35:46,000 --> 00:35:49,000
You never met them!
594
00:35:49,000 --> 00:35:53,000
'Cause you were too busy getting pickle-brined
595
00:35:49,000 --> 00:35:53,000
for 100 years!
596
00:35:53,000 --> 00:35:55,000
It's your fault, Herschel.
597
00:35:55,000 --> 00:35:56,000
You got us arrested.
598
00:35:56,000 --> 00:36:00,000
You ruined my business that I spent years on!
599
00:36:03,000 --> 00:36:04,000
It's a good thing Sarah's not around anymore.
600
00:36:05,000 --> 00:36:07,000
'Cause if she was, she would be ashamed of you.
601
00:36:13,000 --> 00:36:15,000
You hear this vow.
602
00:36:16,000 --> 00:36:19,000
I will create pickle empire.
603
00:36:19,000 --> 00:36:22,000
I will make $200,000.
604
00:36:22,000 --> 00:36:24,000
I will buy back Cossack land.
605
00:36:24,000 --> 00:36:27,000
And I will cut down billboard.
606
00:36:27,000 --> 00:36:30,000
I will prove you stupid.
607
00:36:30,000 --> 00:36:32,000
Because you are my enemy.
608
00:36:33,000 --> 00:36:36,000
You dishonor Greenbaum name.
609
00:36:36,000 --> 00:36:39,000
We are no longer family.
610
00:36:39,000 --> 00:36:40,000
Good luck with that.
611
00:36:40,000 --> 00:36:42,000
You don't know jack shit about shit, man.
612
00:36:42,000 --> 00:36:44,000
You can't even read from what I can tell.
613
00:36:44,000 --> 00:36:45,000
You're gonna start a pickle empire?
614
00:36:45,000 --> 00:36:47,000
You can't even survive out there without my help!
615
00:36:47,000 --> 00:36:50,000
Do not need help from anybody.
616
00:36:50,000 --> 00:36:55,000
I will prove you stupid with no help from anybody ever!
617
00:37:22,000 --> 00:37:24,000
I would like to purchase. How much?
618
00:37:26,000 --> 00:37:29,000
Looks like these are 90 cents apiece.
619
00:37:29,000 --> 00:37:31,000
Terribly sorry, little boy. It sounds to me
620
00:37:31,000 --> 00:37:36,000
like you are saying these cucumbers
621
00:37:31,000 --> 00:37:36,000
are 90 cents apiece.
622
00:37:36,000 --> 00:37:37,000
I am.
623
00:37:58,000 --> 00:37:59,000
Cucumber.
624
00:38:01,000 --> 00:38:02,000
And salt.
625
00:38:04,000 --> 00:38:06,000
Yes!
626
00:38:55,000 --> 00:38:57,000
Yes!
627
00:39:17,000 --> 00:39:18,000
Oh, my God. Kevin, look.
628
00:39:18,000 --> 00:39:20,000
Artisanal pickles.
629
00:39:21,000 --> 00:39:22,000
Well, he's not on Yelp.
630
00:39:22,000 --> 00:39:27,000
Sir. How local is your produce?
631
00:39:27,000 --> 00:39:29,000
I make pickle here in Brooklyn.
632
00:39:29,000 --> 00:39:30,000
And are they all-natural?
633
00:39:31,000 --> 00:39:32,000
Is pickle.
634
00:39:32,000 --> 00:39:34,000
But do you add any chemicals like,
635
00:39:34,000 --> 00:39:36,000
you know, benzoates or preservatives?
636
00:39:38,000 --> 00:39:40,000
I do not even know these words.
637
00:39:40,000 --> 00:39:42,000
Oh, I like your style.
638
00:39:42,000 --> 00:39:43,000
Ooh, let's see.
639
00:39:43,000 --> 00:39:45,000
Wow! Ooh.
640
00:39:45,000 --> 00:39:47,000
Just hits me in my throat.
641
00:39:47,000 --> 00:39:48,000
Very pungent.
642
00:39:48,000 --> 00:39:49,000
Let me smell it.
643
00:39:49,000 --> 00:39:51,000
Oh! Yeah, that burns.
644
00:39:51,000 --> 00:39:52,000
You can feel the burn.
645
00:39:52,000 --> 00:39:54,000
I can, like, smell it in my eye.
646
00:39:54,000 --> 00:39:55,000
Feel the sting.
647
00:39:55,000 --> 00:39:57,000
Give it to me again. Let me smell it.
648
00:39:57,000 --> 00:39:59,000
Mm, yeah, that's straight from the devil.
649
00:40:00,000 --> 00:40:01,000
Satanic. Oh, it stinks.
650
00:40:01,000 --> 00:40:04,000
You know what, it would go so good
651
00:40:01,000 --> 00:40:04,000
with the kelp ceviche.
652
00:40:04,000 --> 00:40:07,000
Oh, my God, that's right. How much do we owe you?
653
00:40:07,000 --> 00:40:09,000
You want to buy?
654
00:40:09,000 --> 00:40:11,000
Of course.
655
00:40:11,000 --> 00:40:12,000
Is four dollar for pickle.
656
00:40:12,000 --> 00:40:16,000
Three dollar less than big store
657
00:40:12,000 --> 00:40:16,000
and I include the scum.
658
00:40:16,000 --> 00:40:18,000
-Okay. Sure. -Okay! Yeah, scum.
659
00:40:18,000 --> 00:40:20,000
-Here you go. -That's great.
660
00:40:20,000 --> 00:40:21,000
Scum it is.
661
00:40:27,000 --> 00:40:29,000
You no haggle.41788
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