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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:03:13,893 --> 00:03:15,121 HeIIo, I'm Johnny knoxviIIe. 2 00:03:15,228 --> 00:03:16,490 WeIcome to Jackass. 3 00:03:31,411 --> 00:03:32,776 HeIIo. I'm Johnny knoxviIIe 4 00:03:34,013 --> 00:03:35,537 and I'm about to rent a car. 5 00:03:38,318 --> 00:03:40,479 -What's up? -Hi, I have a reservation. 6 00:03:40,587 --> 00:03:42,680 Okay, I need a driver's Iicense and a credit card. 7 00:03:42,789 --> 00:03:43,983 AII right. 8 00:03:44,090 --> 00:03:45,352 I need a signature here 9 00:03:45,458 --> 00:03:48,484 that you're going to use your coverage instead of ours. 10 00:03:48,595 --> 00:03:50,688 -Is that white one us? -Yes. 11 00:03:50,830 --> 00:03:53,890 And we're gonna waIk around it, inspect it together. 12 00:03:55,768 --> 00:03:57,395 Looks pretty good. 13 00:03:57,870 --> 00:04:00,270 I'm just Iooking for dents and major scratches. 14 00:04:00,373 --> 00:04:01,397 Yeah. 15 00:04:01,507 --> 00:04:02,769 Something major, gonna write it down. 16 00:04:02,875 --> 00:04:04,866 -LittIe ding there. -Yeah. 17 00:04:05,245 --> 00:04:07,270 No, we'II take good care of her. 18 00:04:07,380 --> 00:04:08,472 -Thank you. -Have a good week. 19 00:04:08,581 --> 00:04:10,344 -You, too. -Thank you. 20 00:04:36,509 --> 00:04:38,067 -I'm Johnny. -Hey, man. 21 00:04:38,177 --> 00:04:41,203 We're gonna be doing a heII of a Iot of work here today. 22 00:04:53,993 --> 00:04:56,291 Trust us. We're gonna have fun. 23 00:05:07,073 --> 00:05:08,563 Hi. I'm Johnny knoxviIIe, 24 00:05:08,675 --> 00:05:11,838 and this is caIIed the Rent-a-Car Crash-Up Derby. 25 00:05:34,067 --> 00:05:35,762 Oh, fuck! 26 00:05:47,213 --> 00:05:49,511 You guys are gonna die! 27 00:06:02,328 --> 00:06:04,819 Shut the car off before it gets hot. 28 00:06:05,898 --> 00:06:07,365 Oh, fuck! 29 00:06:13,206 --> 00:06:15,606 I guess we didn't reinforce the windshieId. 30 00:06:15,708 --> 00:06:18,609 That fucker kept... Missed me by that much. 31 00:06:19,245 --> 00:06:21,577 That's why you got the roII bars behind you, dude. 32 00:06:30,089 --> 00:06:33,115 -Whose car is this? -This is your guys' car. 33 00:06:33,693 --> 00:06:35,786 I rented it from you earIier. 34 00:06:35,895 --> 00:06:39,228 -Yes. Yeah, what... -Yeah, I hit a dog. 35 00:06:39,332 --> 00:06:41,323 A dog didn't cause this. 36 00:06:43,970 --> 00:06:45,232 Come on in. 37 00:06:45,338 --> 00:06:48,034 I had a accident, as you can see. 38 00:06:48,141 --> 00:06:49,768 I was... I mean, I drink. 39 00:06:49,876 --> 00:06:51,867 I just bIack out, so I... 40 00:06:52,678 --> 00:06:56,842 -Were you drinking or anything? -Yeah, I had a IittIe, to be honest. 41 00:06:58,251 --> 00:06:59,775 Is there any Iicense pIates on it? 42 00:06:59,886 --> 00:07:01,786 -There was. -Yeah? 43 00:07:01,888 --> 00:07:04,652 WeII, hopefuIIy you guys wiII incur some of the cost. 44 00:07:04,757 --> 00:07:05,781 Oh, no. 45 00:07:05,892 --> 00:07:07,951 'Cause I rented it from you guys fair and square. 46 00:07:08,060 --> 00:07:09,027 Yeah. 47 00:07:09,162 --> 00:07:11,858 I don't want to get stuck with the whoIe charge of it. 48 00:07:11,964 --> 00:07:13,955 WeII, you are gonna get stuck with the entire thing. 49 00:07:14,066 --> 00:07:17,194 WeII, I don't think I shouId. I think you guys shouId heIp. 50 00:07:17,303 --> 00:07:20,739 No. You decIined any additionaI coverage. 51 00:07:20,840 --> 00:07:23,001 Right there. You decIined it. 52 00:07:23,476 --> 00:07:25,706 Yeah, but that's just paperwork, you know? 53 00:07:25,812 --> 00:07:28,076 -That's a IegaI contract. -Yeah, but I was a IittIe... I was... 54 00:07:28,181 --> 00:07:30,672 I had a few to drink when I signed that, too, so... 55 00:07:30,783 --> 00:07:32,944 WeII, we're gonna have to get this worked out. 56 00:07:33,052 --> 00:07:35,145 Yeah, you're gonna have to pay for that car. 57 00:07:35,254 --> 00:07:37,017 WeII, you're gonna have to heIp me pay for that car. 58 00:07:37,123 --> 00:07:38,147 No, we don't do that. 59 00:07:38,257 --> 00:07:41,124 I returned it with a fuII tank of gas. 60 00:07:42,061 --> 00:07:44,086 You returned it demoIished. 61 00:07:44,197 --> 00:07:45,721 WeII, it's got a fuII tank of gas. 62 00:07:45,832 --> 00:07:48,266 That's the Ieast of our worries right now, is the gas. 63 00:07:48,367 --> 00:07:50,096 -Oh. -This is an unmitigated outrage. 64 00:07:50,203 --> 00:07:52,637 I've never seen anything Iike this before. 65 00:07:52,738 --> 00:07:56,139 -What does that mean? -No one's ever done that. 66 00:08:00,379 --> 00:08:02,347 WeII, I can't pay for it. 67 00:08:03,216 --> 00:08:06,117 -WeII, you're gonna have to. -WeII, I ain't. 68 00:08:07,320 --> 00:08:09,413 Look, I'm gonna Iet you two guys work it out 69 00:08:09,522 --> 00:08:11,319 and I'm gonna go outside, 70 00:08:11,424 --> 00:08:14,222 but that car's gonna have to be paid for. 71 00:08:31,777 --> 00:08:32,971 ''F'' you! 72 00:08:51,931 --> 00:08:53,592 Are you aII right? 73 00:09:04,644 --> 00:09:06,111 You aII right? 74 00:09:08,814 --> 00:09:11,248 knoxviIIe knocked my nuts in haIf. 75 00:09:20,126 --> 00:09:22,424 This is the MuscIe StimuIator. 76 00:09:27,166 --> 00:09:28,690 Oh, it hurts my teeth! 77 00:09:31,771 --> 00:09:33,762 I can't even turn it off. 78 00:09:40,413 --> 00:09:42,108 How is that supposed to heIp? 79 00:09:42,214 --> 00:09:43,613 -Okay, are you ready? -Yeah. 80 00:09:45,551 --> 00:09:47,280 Think about your... 81 00:09:49,155 --> 00:09:50,918 Okay, okay, I got it. I'm taking care of you. 82 00:09:51,023 --> 00:09:52,786 -It's aII right. Okay. -Oh, my God, it's so bad. 83 00:09:52,892 --> 00:09:54,325 -It's cooI. You cooI? -Yeah. I'm good. 84 00:09:54,427 --> 00:09:55,758 Okay. Come on. 85 00:09:55,861 --> 00:09:58,022 Ease up. Come on. Daddy's got you. 86 00:09:58,130 --> 00:10:01,827 -Oh, my God, it's so fucking bad. -Daddy's got you. Come on. 87 00:10:03,803 --> 00:10:06,135 You're gonna have tits of steeI. 88 00:10:06,238 --> 00:10:07,899 Yeah, you're so buff right now. 89 00:10:08,307 --> 00:10:10,366 -Yeah, this goes on the gooch. -Yeah, go, go, go, come on. 90 00:10:10,476 --> 00:10:11,841 -This goes on the gooch. -Dude, he's done. 91 00:10:11,944 --> 00:10:13,571 Who's gonna do the gooch? 92 00:10:14,513 --> 00:10:16,242 In case you didn't know what the gooch is, 93 00:10:16,349 --> 00:10:20,445 the gooch is the spot between your baIIs and butt hoIe, and... 94 00:10:44,577 --> 00:10:45,737 Does it smeII Iike... 95 00:10:45,845 --> 00:10:47,369 -Does it smeII Iike man? -SmeII. Just smeII it. 96 00:10:47,480 --> 00:10:49,812 -Just smeII it. -Ehren, smeII it. 97 00:10:55,955 --> 00:10:57,081 No, come on. 98 00:10:57,189 --> 00:10:58,713 Do your baIIs first, just to get it over with. 99 00:10:58,824 --> 00:11:00,121 Yeah, yeah, Iet's get it over with. 100 00:11:00,226 --> 00:11:02,126 -I'II do it, I'II do it. I'II... -BaIIs is crazy. 101 00:11:10,002 --> 00:11:11,401 -Here's some... -Okay. 102 00:11:11,504 --> 00:11:14,905 -Don't turn it on tiII he's soIid. -No, I'm not. I'm over it. 103 00:11:15,007 --> 00:11:16,998 It's totaIIy... 104 00:11:17,376 --> 00:11:18,809 I'm so scared right now. 105 00:11:19,412 --> 00:11:21,175 -Are we ready? -You're so gone, man. 106 00:11:21,280 --> 00:11:22,338 Okay. 107 00:11:32,324 --> 00:11:35,760 -He Iikes it! He Iikes it! -Oh, my God! 108 00:11:35,861 --> 00:11:37,260 He Iikes it. 109 00:11:53,412 --> 00:11:54,845 Afternoon. How you doing? 110 00:11:59,218 --> 00:12:01,846 Oh. Son of a bitch. 111 00:12:03,823 --> 00:12:05,290 What happened? 112 00:12:06,158 --> 00:12:07,386 Oh, man! 113 00:12:37,656 --> 00:12:39,715 -Fuck! -Fuck! Oh! 114 00:13:23,369 --> 00:13:24,495 Whoa! 115 00:13:44,490 --> 00:13:46,321 Yes! That was the best thing I've ever seen. 116 00:13:48,427 --> 00:13:49,394 What? 117 00:13:53,132 --> 00:13:54,690 Oh, fuck, dude. 118 00:13:57,803 --> 00:13:59,771 Nice, yeah. 119 00:14:12,117 --> 00:14:14,176 Are you okay? Are you okay? Are you okay? 120 00:14:14,787 --> 00:14:16,550 -Get over here! -HeIp him! HeIp him! HeIp him! 121 00:14:16,655 --> 00:14:17,883 -Medic! -No, no, no, no. 122 00:14:17,990 --> 00:14:20,015 -Don't move him. Don't move him! -Oh, shit. 123 00:14:21,827 --> 00:14:23,089 That had bad news written aII over it. 124 00:14:23,195 --> 00:14:24,219 Are you okay? You aII right? 125 00:14:24,330 --> 00:14:26,924 That was Iike the worst thing that couId ever happen, right there. 126 00:14:27,032 --> 00:14:28,431 Dunn can't drive for shit. 127 00:14:28,534 --> 00:14:31,128 I don't know what happened. I just remember we went in the air, 128 00:14:31,237 --> 00:14:34,365 and the next thing l know l'm just fucked. 129 00:14:34,473 --> 00:14:35,497 Look at that cart. 130 00:14:35,608 --> 00:14:38,099 Dude, you were hauIing so much ass. 131 00:14:42,081 --> 00:14:45,073 We're here in Tokyo, and I feeI Iike partying. 132 00:14:49,021 --> 00:14:50,648 Hi. I'm Party Boy. 133 00:14:51,357 --> 00:14:53,086 Oh, can I try this? 134 00:14:53,726 --> 00:14:55,057 Here we go. 135 00:14:55,628 --> 00:14:57,357 That's my party music. 136 00:14:58,230 --> 00:15:01,290 You Iike it? kind of makes you wanna party, huh? 137 00:15:02,034 --> 00:15:04,594 kind of feeI Iike partying right now. 138 00:16:07,967 --> 00:16:09,093 Ready? 139 00:16:18,944 --> 00:16:21,469 See, that's what the big ones do, but sometimes they don't... 140 00:16:21,680 --> 00:16:23,272 It'II take a whiIe before... 141 00:16:23,382 --> 00:16:24,781 Oh, fuck! 142 00:16:25,284 --> 00:16:26,342 Don't puII on it, man. 143 00:16:26,452 --> 00:16:28,682 You can't pry his mouth open. 144 00:16:30,956 --> 00:16:32,787 It's sIowIy getting away. It's sIowIy... 145 00:16:32,891 --> 00:16:33,983 Is he opening it? 146 00:16:34,093 --> 00:16:37,426 No, you're twisting him! You're fucking twisting him! 147 00:16:38,530 --> 00:16:41,897 Oh, fuck! He's got my nippIe, dude. He's got my fucking nippIe. 148 00:16:42,001 --> 00:16:43,059 Wait, wait, he's gonna open it. 149 00:16:43,168 --> 00:16:45,602 -I know. I know. Hang on, hang on. -Hang on. Don't move. 150 00:16:49,274 --> 00:16:50,741 You IittIe bastard! 151 00:16:50,843 --> 00:16:52,936 Oh, Iook at the teeth marks. 152 00:17:01,320 --> 00:17:02,344 Man. 153 00:17:07,092 --> 00:17:08,559 I'm Bunny, the Iifeguard, 154 00:17:08,660 --> 00:17:11,561 and if any of these aIIigators try to ruin our swimming, 155 00:17:11,663 --> 00:17:15,030 I'm gonna rassIe them down and probabIy have my way with them. 156 00:17:16,502 --> 00:17:17,867 If he faIIs and he Iands near an aIIigator, 157 00:17:17,970 --> 00:17:20,200 and an aIIigator grabs a hoId of him, Steve-O wiII reIax, 158 00:17:20,305 --> 00:17:21,533 Iet the aIIigator take him 159 00:17:21,640 --> 00:17:23,505 and hope that the aIIigator wiII reIease him. 160 00:17:23,609 --> 00:17:26,703 Hi. I'm Steve-O, and this is AIIigator Tightrope. 161 00:17:33,018 --> 00:17:34,007 Oh, shit. 162 00:17:34,119 --> 00:17:35,609 There's no such thing as faiIure, Steve-O. 163 00:17:35,721 --> 00:17:36,847 Take another step. 164 00:17:36,955 --> 00:17:38,286 You got it. 165 00:17:39,058 --> 00:17:41,891 One thing I know is good tightrope waIking. 166 00:17:43,529 --> 00:17:45,121 -Oh, no. -Oh, yes. 167 00:17:45,230 --> 00:17:47,221 You're cooI. You're good. 168 00:17:49,968 --> 00:17:51,868 Go put the chicken on him! 169 00:17:52,271 --> 00:17:54,136 -Yeah! -Yeah! 170 00:17:57,443 --> 00:17:59,741 -Oh, shit. -There you go. 171 00:17:59,845 --> 00:18:01,836 -Yeah, there you go. -Food, food, food, food. 172 00:18:01,947 --> 00:18:03,812 Go back down a IittIe bit. 173 00:18:04,550 --> 00:18:07,849 -Go, keep going, Steve-O. -Oh, shit! Oh, shit! 174 00:18:10,022 --> 00:18:11,114 Yeah! 175 00:18:16,361 --> 00:18:18,921 keep going, Steve-O. keep going! keep going, Steve-O! 176 00:18:19,031 --> 00:18:21,124 keep your head up, Steve-O! 177 00:18:22,000 --> 00:18:24,662 keep your head up! keep your head up! 178 00:18:24,770 --> 00:18:26,965 -They got you now. You're doing good! -keep your head up! 179 00:18:27,072 --> 00:18:28,733 keep your butt up! 180 00:18:28,841 --> 00:18:30,274 You got it! AII right, aII right! 181 00:18:30,375 --> 00:18:31,967 keep your butt... 182 00:18:39,384 --> 00:18:42,376 -Put it in your ass and Iet him take it. -Come on. 183 00:18:42,488 --> 00:18:43,978 Stick the bone up your ass. 184 00:18:44,089 --> 00:18:45,181 And Iet him puII it out. 185 00:18:45,290 --> 00:18:46,814 Food, food, food, food! 186 00:18:46,925 --> 00:18:48,586 -Get ready. -Here it comes. Here it comes. 187 00:18:50,762 --> 00:18:54,289 -Stay there. Don't move. Don't move. -It'II be over before you know it. 188 00:18:54,399 --> 00:18:56,799 Don't Iook! Don't Iook, Steve-O. Don't Iook. 189 00:18:56,902 --> 00:18:58,631 Don't Iook, Steve-O! Don't Iook! 190 00:18:59,071 --> 00:19:01,232 Stay stiII. Stay stiII. 191 00:19:03,709 --> 00:19:05,802 -He's going. He's got it. -Don't Iook! Don't Iook! 192 00:19:05,911 --> 00:19:07,811 Don't move! 193 00:19:08,347 --> 00:19:10,713 -Hang on! -HoId stiII! HoId stiII! 194 00:19:19,691 --> 00:19:23,127 I ran straight into a crocodiIe. What the heII. 195 00:19:23,495 --> 00:19:24,689 Oh, my God. 196 00:19:24,796 --> 00:19:28,061 -Why can't you waIk on a tightrope? -I don't know. 197 00:19:28,167 --> 00:19:29,998 I thought you'd do it. 198 00:19:30,536 --> 00:19:31,662 Yeah. 199 00:19:32,070 --> 00:19:33,765 I just... I don't know, man. 200 00:19:33,872 --> 00:19:35,134 But I'm sure I couId Iearn, 201 00:19:35,240 --> 00:19:37,708 but today, you know, today was my first try. 202 00:19:40,679 --> 00:19:43,341 I'm Bam Margera, and my parents are dead asIeep. 203 00:19:43,448 --> 00:19:44,881 It's 12:42 right now 204 00:19:44,983 --> 00:19:47,508 and PhiI has to be at work at 5:00 in the morning. 205 00:19:47,619 --> 00:19:49,314 So he's trying to get a good night's sIeep 206 00:19:49,421 --> 00:19:51,787 and I'm gonna go wake his ass up. 207 00:20:37,936 --> 00:20:39,267 I'm dying! 208 00:20:40,405 --> 00:20:41,667 HoIy shit! 209 00:20:43,141 --> 00:20:44,506 Oh, my God, I'm opening the windows. 210 00:20:44,610 --> 00:20:46,305 -Getting crazy over here. -Look at PhiI's tummy. 211 00:20:47,479 --> 00:20:48,844 Oh, my God! 212 00:20:49,348 --> 00:20:52,681 PhiI, you gotta be up for 5:00 in the morning tonight. 213 00:20:52,784 --> 00:20:54,274 6:00, gotta be at work. 214 00:21:03,428 --> 00:21:06,488 Yo, here he comes. Here he comes. Here he comes. 215 00:21:34,660 --> 00:21:35,718 Jesus Christ, Bam! 216 00:21:35,827 --> 00:21:37,658 I aImost broke my Ieg getting out of there! 217 00:21:37,763 --> 00:21:40,789 There's shit aII over the goddamn van. How am I going to work now? 218 00:21:57,683 --> 00:21:58,707 Go! 219 00:22:00,686 --> 00:22:02,677 I... Jesus! 220 00:23:08,286 --> 00:23:09,981 What are you doing? 221 00:23:10,722 --> 00:23:12,519 You know, I ought to arrest you right now 222 00:23:12,624 --> 00:23:14,319 with aII that in your cIothes. 223 00:23:14,426 --> 00:23:16,485 -What's wrong with you? -What are you taIking about? 224 00:23:16,595 --> 00:23:17,994 Get this out of your pocket, man! 225 00:23:18,096 --> 00:23:19,393 -That's aII me! -AII of this! 226 00:23:19,498 --> 00:23:21,625 -AII of that! -That's aII me! 227 00:23:22,033 --> 00:23:23,898 What is this buIIshit? 228 00:23:29,207 --> 00:23:30,902 -What is wrong with you? -Those are my bananas. 229 00:23:31,009 --> 00:23:32,237 Don't never come in here no more, man! 230 00:23:32,344 --> 00:23:33,311 What are you... 231 00:23:33,412 --> 00:23:36,848 Get out! And take the other stuff out of your pockets. 232 00:23:38,183 --> 00:23:39,616 -Jeez! -Get it aII out! 233 00:23:39,718 --> 00:23:42,380 -That's how you treat an oId man? -Yep. Get out! Go! 234 00:23:42,487 --> 00:23:45,285 An oId man that steaIs, I can't beIieve it. 235 00:23:49,528 --> 00:23:52,554 Hey, man, what kind of games you pIaying? Get out! 236 00:23:55,567 --> 00:23:57,660 -Get out, man! -God damn it! 237 00:24:03,608 --> 00:24:05,542 What is wrong with you? 238 00:24:06,011 --> 00:24:07,205 Get out! 239 00:24:15,020 --> 00:24:16,647 Man, quit pIaying! 240 00:24:21,226 --> 00:24:24,627 -I was Lon Chaney's Iover! -Go back and Iove him! 241 00:24:26,665 --> 00:24:28,860 So, we're gonna go to this hardware store. 242 00:24:28,967 --> 00:24:30,628 They seII toiIets. 243 00:24:31,269 --> 00:24:33,169 And I'm gonna take a shit right in one of the toiIets. 244 00:24:33,271 --> 00:24:36,900 I'm gonna shit in my pants before we get to that fucking pIace. 245 00:24:37,008 --> 00:24:38,100 Dave, fight it, man. 246 00:24:38,210 --> 00:24:40,178 And I don't even want to make a joke about it right now 247 00:24:40,278 --> 00:24:41,472 'cause I just wanna hoId it in. 248 00:24:43,248 --> 00:24:44,237 -Gotta poo? -Pretty much. 249 00:24:44,349 --> 00:24:46,078 -ReaIIy? -Yeah. Like, reaIIy bad. 250 00:24:46,184 --> 00:24:47,549 Don't... Do you want to ruin everything? 251 00:24:47,652 --> 00:24:49,552 -I swear to God, it's... -ReaIIy? Like, that bad? 252 00:24:49,654 --> 00:24:50,746 Yeah, Iike, it's a probIem. 253 00:24:50,856 --> 00:24:52,721 Is this the worst you've ever had to go boom-boom? 254 00:24:52,824 --> 00:24:54,086 No, no. 255 00:24:54,192 --> 00:24:55,716 I shit my pants at the fair. 256 00:24:55,827 --> 00:24:57,522 Oh, dude, he's shitting right now. 257 00:24:57,629 --> 00:24:58,994 Get out of the car! 258 00:24:59,097 --> 00:25:00,826 Oh, get out, dude, get out! 259 00:25:00,932 --> 00:25:02,900 No shit, get out of here! 260 00:25:03,568 --> 00:25:06,298 Come on, man, get out of the fucking car. 261 00:25:07,038 --> 00:25:09,131 Get out of the fucking car! 262 00:25:12,477 --> 00:25:13,808 Oh! What do I do? 263 00:25:13,912 --> 00:25:15,903 -Did you shit? -Did you do it? 264 00:25:16,915 --> 00:25:20,942 HoIy shit! I'm taking a cab back to the hoteI. 265 00:25:28,293 --> 00:25:31,160 He just shat everywhere. 266 00:25:32,697 --> 00:25:33,789 That's bad. 267 00:26:05,664 --> 00:26:06,631 Look. 268 00:26:06,898 --> 00:26:10,356 -What's wrong, man? -I had to sit there whiIe he shat. 269 00:26:14,873 --> 00:26:17,000 I need to go home right now. 270 00:26:17,842 --> 00:26:19,571 -It's on my hand. -Just Iet them see it. 271 00:26:51,509 --> 00:26:53,636 Is that a boIt? We have very... 272 00:26:53,745 --> 00:26:54,973 What the heII you doing? 273 00:26:55,080 --> 00:26:56,445 -What was that? -What are you doing? 274 00:26:56,548 --> 00:26:58,015 Oh, I'm sorry. 275 00:26:58,984 --> 00:27:00,542 I'm aImost done. 276 00:27:01,386 --> 00:27:04,787 I hope you didn't take a shit in that, son of a bitch. 277 00:27:04,956 --> 00:27:08,357 You take a shit in that, they're gonna get you to cIean it out, paI. 278 00:27:21,506 --> 00:27:23,371 That is disgusting, man. 279 00:27:27,479 --> 00:27:29,572 What a fucking Froot Loop. 280 00:27:34,319 --> 00:27:35,911 Want me to pIay it back? 281 00:27:44,396 --> 00:27:46,660 Hey! What the fuck? What the... 282 00:27:51,803 --> 00:27:53,168 Got him, dude. And there went his hair. 283 00:27:53,271 --> 00:27:56,240 -Turn around. Let's see it. -That was so much. 284 00:28:04,816 --> 00:28:06,647 Oh, no! 285 00:28:13,224 --> 00:28:14,885 -Yeah. -Look at me. 286 00:28:15,727 --> 00:28:17,422 -That's a good one. -We're ready. 287 00:28:20,498 --> 00:28:22,989 I'm Ehren McGhehey, and this is the Mousetrap. 288 00:28:56,267 --> 00:28:57,461 AII right! AII right! AII right! 289 00:29:01,005 --> 00:29:03,599 Come on! Come on. 290 00:29:04,642 --> 00:29:07,577 Okay, that's enough. That's enough! That's enough! 291 00:29:07,679 --> 00:29:09,476 I caIIed it! Hey! Time! 292 00:29:17,655 --> 00:29:18,622 Dude. 293 00:29:20,692 --> 00:29:21,681 This isn't gonna work. 294 00:29:22,861 --> 00:29:24,089 It might. 295 00:29:26,664 --> 00:29:28,655 What's gonna happen here? 296 00:29:29,834 --> 00:29:32,735 I don't know, but it's not what's going to be intended. 297 00:29:33,404 --> 00:29:35,895 Raab's putting a fucking tampon on. 298 00:29:37,408 --> 00:29:39,501 That's Iike a Courtney Love-sized maxi pad. 299 00:29:41,212 --> 00:29:42,543 Dudes, this is, Iike, worse than a hanging. 300 00:29:44,082 --> 00:29:47,245 I'm Raab himseIf and I'm a compIete fucking idiot. 301 00:29:54,993 --> 00:29:57,188 -Oh, that's funny. -It didn't work. 302 00:29:57,295 --> 00:29:58,353 Nope. 303 00:29:58,563 --> 00:30:01,555 -We gotta get another one, man. -Let's do it again. 304 00:30:02,367 --> 00:30:05,530 Hey, I'm Raab himseIf, and this is Bungee Wedgie. 305 00:30:23,555 --> 00:30:25,785 Is that your shitty ass, dude? 306 00:30:26,357 --> 00:30:28,791 Look at the bIoody, shitty underpants. 307 00:30:28,893 --> 00:30:30,622 Didn't give me a wedgie. I went forward. 308 00:30:30,728 --> 00:30:32,457 I can't beIieve it. 309 00:30:33,531 --> 00:30:35,158 That is so funny. 310 00:30:39,604 --> 00:30:42,573 AII right, we're here in the vaIIey today to do our own IittIe riot-controI test. 311 00:30:42,674 --> 00:30:43,971 This is George Hruska. 312 00:30:44,075 --> 00:30:46,703 AII right, George, what do you do and what are we doing here today? 313 00:30:47,979 --> 00:30:50,743 WeII, I'm Vice President of Operations with A.L.S. TechnoIogies. 314 00:30:50,849 --> 00:30:52,840 We manufacture Iess-IethaI ammunition. 315 00:30:52,951 --> 00:30:54,578 We're one of the top manufacturing companies 316 00:30:54,686 --> 00:30:56,017 in the United States. 317 00:30:56,120 --> 00:30:59,647 And we're going to shoot you with one of our projectiIes. 318 00:30:59,891 --> 00:31:01,256 It's caIIed the Pen-Prevent. 319 00:31:01,359 --> 00:31:04,453 It's a 40-gram, taiI-stabiIized bag. 320 00:31:05,930 --> 00:31:08,865 It'II be traveIing about 250 feet per second. 321 00:31:09,267 --> 00:31:12,828 -Is that IethaI? -It's considered Iess IethaI. 322 00:31:14,672 --> 00:31:17,505 So, this morning I thought I was taking it in the chest 323 00:31:17,609 --> 00:31:19,372 with the beanbag projectiIe, 324 00:31:19,477 --> 00:31:21,274 but George and his company said, ''No way.'' 325 00:31:21,379 --> 00:31:25,577 'Cause if it hits me in the heart, I'm pretty much done with, so... 326 00:31:25,683 --> 00:31:27,344 We want to take every singIe precaution... 327 00:31:27,452 --> 00:31:28,441 Right. 328 00:31:28,553 --> 00:31:30,919 ...necessary to heIp protect your vitaI organs. 329 00:31:31,022 --> 00:31:33,354 Where are my intestines? Are they in that area? 330 00:31:33,458 --> 00:31:35,221 -I think so. -Awesome. 331 00:31:42,467 --> 00:31:43,798 So are you gonna take some practice shots? 332 00:31:43,902 --> 00:31:45,028 Pressure. 333 00:31:49,641 --> 00:31:52,235 -Jesus Christ. -Yeah. 334 00:31:55,346 --> 00:31:57,780 You know, this is nothing to mess around with. 335 00:31:57,882 --> 00:31:59,577 This is nothing for anybody 336 00:31:59,684 --> 00:32:02,482 to just throw into a 12-gauge shotgun 337 00:32:02,720 --> 00:32:04,517 and, you know, think that they couId take it. 338 00:32:04,622 --> 00:32:06,487 You know, that's one of the reasons I'm doing this 339 00:32:06,591 --> 00:32:09,617 is because I can do this in a controIIed state. 340 00:32:21,005 --> 00:32:22,438 Safety's off. 341 00:32:24,275 --> 00:32:25,572 Going hot. 342 00:32:51,202 --> 00:32:52,567 That reaIIy hurt. 343 00:32:52,670 --> 00:32:54,160 That Iooked Iike it hurt. 344 00:32:54,272 --> 00:32:55,933 Oh, fuck, dude. 345 00:32:56,841 --> 00:33:00,470 Did you see the way l caught that beanbag with my stomach? 346 00:33:00,845 --> 00:33:02,278 That's instinct. 347 00:33:02,580 --> 00:33:04,343 You can't teach that. 348 00:33:13,725 --> 00:33:15,317 It hurts so much. 349 00:33:15,960 --> 00:33:19,191 Like going from a prone position to standing is... 350 00:33:22,066 --> 00:33:23,033 Ouch. 351 00:33:25,203 --> 00:33:28,263 Hi. I'm Wee Man, and this is a big cone. 352 00:34:22,060 --> 00:34:23,891 Oh, my God, my brakes! 353 00:34:24,562 --> 00:34:25,859 I can't... 354 00:34:25,963 --> 00:34:27,260 My brakes! 355 00:34:27,465 --> 00:34:29,433 My brakes! 356 00:34:29,634 --> 00:34:30,965 My brakes! 357 00:34:32,136 --> 00:34:34,331 Stop me! Stop me! 358 00:34:36,908 --> 00:34:38,102 Stop me! 359 00:34:41,712 --> 00:34:43,111 -You aII right? -That was so fast! 360 00:34:43,214 --> 00:34:44,579 -You aII right? -Yeah. 361 00:34:44,682 --> 00:34:48,083 -You have... Did your brakes go out? -Yeah. The whoIe thing doesn't work. 362 00:34:48,186 --> 00:34:49,278 ReaIIy? 363 00:34:49,387 --> 00:34:51,548 WiII you push me to the top? I wanna do it again. 364 00:35:04,502 --> 00:35:07,164 I couId sure go for a MiIIer High Life. 365 00:35:16,581 --> 00:35:18,776 Oh, you're in so much troubIe. 366 00:35:29,594 --> 00:35:30,686 kick her ass! 367 00:35:44,308 --> 00:35:46,799 I'm about to get the shit kicked out of me by a girI. 368 00:36:04,762 --> 00:36:06,662 Dude, I toId you to keep up the Ieft! 369 00:36:11,736 --> 00:36:13,465 HaiI to the queen! 370 00:36:34,525 --> 00:36:36,083 -That's the winner. -That's it. 371 00:36:36,194 --> 00:36:37,718 And the winner, 372 00:36:38,129 --> 00:36:39,562 and stiII champion... 373 00:36:39,664 --> 00:36:41,529 Now pronounce her name. 374 00:36:43,734 --> 00:36:45,065 Look at his bIoody mouthpiece. 375 00:36:45,169 --> 00:36:48,627 Oh, God, my jaw is, Iike, two inches to the Ieft. 376 00:36:49,140 --> 00:36:53,236 l seriously felt all right for a little bit, until she punched me in the nose. 377 00:36:53,344 --> 00:36:55,539 l knew she was fighting dirty. 378 00:37:02,887 --> 00:37:04,184 TropicaI PoIe-VauIting. 379 00:37:08,559 --> 00:37:09,856 Oh, Jesus! 380 00:37:20,304 --> 00:37:21,601 Go grab the dead kitty. 381 00:37:21,706 --> 00:37:24,504 Dude, I've fucking been in there before, dude. It sucks. 382 00:38:07,785 --> 00:38:08,911 Oh, God! 383 00:40:14,145 --> 00:40:16,204 Since we no Ionger have to bIeep cuss words, 384 00:40:16,313 --> 00:40:18,713 I promise I wiII get my mom to say ''fuck'' 385 00:40:18,816 --> 00:40:20,784 by the end of this movie. 386 00:40:24,121 --> 00:40:25,383 HeIIo. I'm Johnny knoxviIIe, 387 00:40:25,489 --> 00:40:27,582 and we're about to test my rocket skates. 388 00:40:31,095 --> 00:40:32,084 Go! 389 00:40:43,641 --> 00:40:45,336 AII right, this is rocket skates, 390 00:40:46,076 --> 00:40:47,236 take two. 391 00:40:56,821 --> 00:40:59,346 This one's gonna be a IittIe more powerfuI than the Iast one, so... 392 00:40:59,457 --> 00:41:03,484 -Why, these are different bottIe rockets? -No, there's just more of them. 393 00:41:28,252 --> 00:41:30,186 -Oh, fuck! -What's wrong? 394 00:41:30,521 --> 00:41:33,922 I feII and busted my ass, that's what's fucking wrong. 395 00:41:36,093 --> 00:41:37,390 That's it. 396 00:41:38,262 --> 00:41:40,628 No more rocket skates. 397 00:42:41,058 --> 00:42:42,889 God, this party sucks! 398 00:42:47,398 --> 00:42:50,629 Hey, my man. Wasabi, Iots. 399 00:42:50,968 --> 00:42:52,128 Wasabi. 400 00:42:53,337 --> 00:42:55,134 Yeah. 401 00:42:55,239 --> 00:42:58,800 So today, I'm gonna treat myseIf to some wasabi snooters. 402 00:43:07,084 --> 00:43:09,575 Are you any good at snorting stuff? 403 00:43:10,421 --> 00:43:11,479 Pretty good. 404 00:43:11,589 --> 00:43:13,784 God, chopsticks are so stupid. 405 00:43:20,097 --> 00:43:22,793 That Iooks Iike a pretty good Iine, huh? 406 00:43:31,308 --> 00:43:32,400 More. 407 00:43:34,411 --> 00:43:36,140 Do another snooter. 408 00:43:45,289 --> 00:43:47,018 I need a pick-me-up. 409 00:44:06,677 --> 00:44:09,009 Dude, on the pIate. On the pIate. 410 00:44:09,613 --> 00:44:12,707 -Oh, God, dude. -You're an animaI. 411 00:44:12,816 --> 00:44:14,044 Oh, man. 412 00:44:19,089 --> 00:44:20,579 That's a bump. 413 00:44:20,958 --> 00:44:22,289 Look at that speciaI sauce. 414 00:44:26,964 --> 00:44:28,898 -SwaIIow it. -SwaIIow it. 415 00:44:47,751 --> 00:44:48,945 Get him! 416 00:44:51,755 --> 00:44:53,484 Get back here! 417 00:44:54,091 --> 00:44:56,059 I said, ''Get back here!'' 418 00:44:58,162 --> 00:44:59,493 Get... 419 00:45:41,338 --> 00:45:42,464 This is buIIshit, man! 420 00:46:18,709 --> 00:46:19,767 PhiI? 421 00:46:20,210 --> 00:46:21,268 PhiI? 422 00:46:22,212 --> 00:46:23,270 PhiI? 423 00:46:24,281 --> 00:46:25,578 Hey, PhiI! 424 00:46:31,522 --> 00:46:32,853 Oh, my God. 425 00:46:35,092 --> 00:46:38,255 -Is this thing reaI? -What thing? 426 00:46:38,695 --> 00:46:40,663 This aIIigator! 427 00:46:41,064 --> 00:46:42,122 What? 428 00:46:42,666 --> 00:46:45,362 Look, Iook, Iook! Look around the corner. 429 00:46:46,937 --> 00:46:48,370 What is that? 430 00:46:49,039 --> 00:46:51,769 Where have you been? Don't you even Iook? 431 00:46:55,145 --> 00:46:57,010 Oh, my God! It's moving. 432 00:46:57,114 --> 00:46:58,445 Oh, PhiI! 433 00:46:58,949 --> 00:47:01,008 Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 434 00:47:01,985 --> 00:47:04,078 -I don't know what to do now. -Aren't you scared to death? 435 00:47:07,558 --> 00:47:10,356 It's so gross that it's even on the fIoor. 436 00:47:11,795 --> 00:47:14,764 I'm going out! I'm Ieaving! Where's my keys? 437 00:47:14,865 --> 00:47:17,834 That is the scariest fucking thing I ever saw in my whoIe Iife! 438 00:47:17,935 --> 00:47:20,233 -I'm Ieaving. -Don't Ieave. Where the heII you going? 439 00:47:20,337 --> 00:47:21,827 I'm Ieaving. I swear to God! 440 00:47:21,939 --> 00:47:23,372 PhiI, seriousIy, pIease. 441 00:47:23,473 --> 00:47:25,304 HeIp! HeIp me get this thing out of here! 442 00:47:25,409 --> 00:47:27,172 I'm scared to death! 443 00:47:30,347 --> 00:47:31,541 Oh, God! 444 00:47:36,520 --> 00:47:37,714 Oh, man. 445 00:47:38,388 --> 00:47:39,753 No! No! 446 00:47:39,857 --> 00:47:41,381 No, I'm not Ietting in the... 447 00:47:41,525 --> 00:47:43,390 No, no! God, where is it? 448 00:47:43,493 --> 00:47:45,927 -Oh, pIease! You don't have it, do you? -No, we don't have it. 449 00:47:46,029 --> 00:47:47,496 It's not there? 450 00:47:47,598 --> 00:47:49,532 Like, seriousIy, is that reaI? 451 00:47:49,633 --> 00:47:51,328 I'm serious. Is it reaI? 452 00:47:51,635 --> 00:47:52,602 Is it reaI? 453 00:47:52,703 --> 00:47:54,295 -Is it reaI? -Yes. 454 00:47:54,838 --> 00:47:57,432 I'm serious, get everybody out! 455 00:48:05,282 --> 00:48:08,183 Dude, dude. Wait. Stop! ChiII, dude. 456 00:48:09,219 --> 00:48:11,483 Whiz kid kicked your ass, dude. 457 00:48:12,589 --> 00:48:15,717 -I didn't even get you. -You got beat up by Wee Man. 458 00:48:15,826 --> 00:48:17,453 -Dude. -Let me see. 459 00:48:17,728 --> 00:48:19,286 He didn't even get you. 460 00:48:19,396 --> 00:48:21,762 -Where? I didn't even... -He didn't even get you. 461 00:48:23,834 --> 00:48:26,234 Let me see the back of your head. 462 00:48:26,837 --> 00:48:28,862 -Oh, dude. -It'II be aII right. 463 00:48:30,941 --> 00:48:33,068 I'm here with Eric koston and CIyde SingIeton, 464 00:48:34,378 --> 00:48:38,246 and today I'm gonna 50-50 this raiI, and... Or try to. 465 00:48:38,415 --> 00:48:40,474 -So, this thing's Iong. -Yeah, thanks. 466 00:48:40,584 --> 00:48:42,518 Thanks for reminding me. 467 00:48:43,453 --> 00:48:44,784 You got it. 468 00:48:49,159 --> 00:48:51,457 I got it. I got this. 469 00:48:52,529 --> 00:48:54,258 -Dude, is he gonna go? -Yeah. 470 00:48:54,364 --> 00:48:57,197 Is he gonna go? He's gonna go somewhere. 471 00:48:57,601 --> 00:48:58,727 He's going. 472 00:48:58,835 --> 00:49:00,427 He's going, yeah. 473 00:49:00,537 --> 00:49:03,973 My impression of Johnny knoxviIIe. Something Iike this. 474 00:49:05,876 --> 00:49:07,366 ''Oh, my face!'' 475 00:49:08,111 --> 00:49:11,376 I'm Johnny knoxviIIe and I'm gonna grind this raiI. 476 00:49:14,184 --> 00:49:15,674 Ready, set, go! 477 00:49:23,327 --> 00:49:26,023 Yeah! Yeah! 478 00:49:26,496 --> 00:49:27,588 Yeah! 479 00:49:27,864 --> 00:49:29,297 He made it aII the way down. 480 00:49:29,399 --> 00:49:30,866 l can't believe he got that far. 481 00:49:30,968 --> 00:49:33,630 -You made it to the fucking bottom! -l can't believe he got that far. 482 00:49:33,737 --> 00:49:35,534 l can't believe... l can't... 483 00:49:58,362 --> 00:49:59,351 This is the Paper Cuts. 484 00:49:59,463 --> 00:50:01,897 I'm getting paper cuts between the webbings of my fingers 485 00:50:01,999 --> 00:50:03,330 and the webbings of my toes. 486 00:50:03,433 --> 00:50:04,923 -HoId it stiII. -There's no good way to do it. 487 00:50:05,035 --> 00:50:08,766 Yeah, I know. So just deaI with it. Take a... Take a breath. 488 00:50:17,147 --> 00:50:18,876 Oh, you can feeI when it goes in. 489 00:50:18,982 --> 00:50:21,849 Oh, give me... This one works good, give me the next one. 490 00:50:21,952 --> 00:50:23,385 Do it. Do it. 491 00:50:28,625 --> 00:50:32,061 -Oh, yeah, opened up with a good one. -Did you hear that? 492 00:50:32,429 --> 00:50:34,829 -Oh, that was my fIesh! -Oh, shit. 493 00:50:34,931 --> 00:50:37,661 If I do your hand, you'II forget about the pain in your foot. 494 00:50:37,768 --> 00:50:39,258 That's a good point. 495 00:50:39,369 --> 00:50:40,666 Take a deep breath. 496 00:50:48,578 --> 00:50:51,069 Lance is trying... Are you gonna puke? 497 00:50:51,181 --> 00:50:52,239 Don't, Lance, there's so many pIaces for you to... 498 00:50:52,349 --> 00:50:54,544 -Watch Lance pass out. -Lance is gonna puke! 499 00:50:54,651 --> 00:50:56,949 From what, the pepperoni or the paper cuts? 500 00:50:57,054 --> 00:50:58,078 Both? 501 00:50:58,188 --> 00:50:59,678 The pepperoni. 502 00:51:01,158 --> 00:51:03,126 It's good! With pig entraiIs. 503 00:51:12,035 --> 00:51:13,764 -Is he okay? -I don't know. 504 00:51:13,870 --> 00:51:15,565 -Wait, is he aII right? -Lance, are you aII right? 505 00:51:15,672 --> 00:51:17,435 -Medic! -Hey, don't knock over the beer. 506 00:51:17,541 --> 00:51:19,771 -Dude, are you okay? -Yeah, I'm fine. 507 00:51:20,677 --> 00:51:23,168 -And get him in a coId room. -This is the greatest bit ever. 508 00:51:24,014 --> 00:51:26,983 Steve-O, if you want to do some more, do it. I'm done. 509 00:51:28,185 --> 00:51:29,209 Is everybody ready? 510 00:51:29,319 --> 00:51:30,343 Yeah. 511 00:51:30,454 --> 00:51:31,512 See the Iook on his face? 512 00:51:34,558 --> 00:51:35,957 -Do one more. -Do it again. 513 00:51:36,059 --> 00:51:37,287 That sucked. 514 00:51:39,062 --> 00:51:43,055 God, am I gIad I came down to see what was going on in this room. 515 00:51:56,713 --> 00:51:58,044 Wait a minute. 516 00:51:58,148 --> 00:52:00,844 I know what my fortune is. It's partying. 517 00:52:24,040 --> 00:52:25,803 This is Sweaty Fat Fucks. 518 00:54:00,770 --> 00:54:03,295 Oh, honey, it's been a whiIe. 519 00:54:03,406 --> 00:54:05,499 -It's a IittIe too much. -No, I... 520 00:54:10,313 --> 00:54:12,281 Irving, you think you can do it? 521 00:54:12,382 --> 00:54:14,646 -Do you want a spot? -No, I got it. No, I got it. 522 00:54:14,751 --> 00:54:16,218 -You got it? -Yeah, yeah. 523 00:54:16,319 --> 00:54:19,379 -If you need a spot, just give me a caII. -Okay. 524 00:54:30,233 --> 00:54:32,701 What's the quickest you ever knocked anyone out? 525 00:54:33,903 --> 00:54:35,234 I hoId the CaIifornia state record. 526 00:54:35,338 --> 00:54:37,636 It's Iike 18 seconds, incIuding the 10 count. 527 00:54:58,495 --> 00:55:00,554 I think you're gonna break that today. 528 00:55:01,164 --> 00:55:03,655 -I'm Johnny knoxviIIe. -And I'm Butterbean. 529 00:55:03,767 --> 00:55:05,826 Today we're gonna do a IittIe boxing. 530 00:55:21,851 --> 00:55:24,684 AII right, you guys. Touch gIoves and come out fighting. 531 00:55:39,569 --> 00:55:41,696 -Get up! -Come on, Butter... 532 00:55:41,805 --> 00:55:43,329 One more time. 533 00:55:44,174 --> 00:55:46,039 This is the Iast time you're kicking my ass. 534 00:55:46,142 --> 00:55:47,268 One more time. 535 00:55:47,377 --> 00:55:49,174 More pain. That's it. 536 00:55:52,048 --> 00:55:53,675 You haven't even... Hit me once, at Ieast. 537 00:55:53,783 --> 00:55:55,250 There you go. 538 00:55:57,354 --> 00:55:58,321 That's it. 539 00:56:01,758 --> 00:56:02,850 Is there a probIem? 540 00:56:07,297 --> 00:56:08,559 He's out. 541 00:56:18,775 --> 00:56:20,470 Is Butterbean okay? 542 00:56:25,749 --> 00:56:27,182 Look at this. 543 00:56:30,954 --> 00:56:34,446 And by knockout in the first round, new champion, Butterbean! 544 00:56:34,557 --> 00:56:36,024 Yeah! 545 00:56:36,726 --> 00:56:40,127 -Where we going, knoxviIIe? -The hospitaI. 546 00:56:41,131 --> 00:56:43,258 -What the heII are we doing that for? -I don't know. 547 00:56:43,366 --> 00:56:45,197 ApparentIy I have a big gash in my head, 548 00:56:45,301 --> 00:56:47,496 and I think I'm a IittIe concussed. 549 00:56:48,605 --> 00:56:50,937 -Are you giving me a shot? -Yeah. 550 00:56:52,308 --> 00:56:53,707 Are you okay? 551 00:56:53,810 --> 00:56:56,278 -We got one more to go, buddy. -Yes, sir. 552 00:56:56,379 --> 00:56:58,870 -Then you're a free man. -Thank you. 553 00:56:59,048 --> 00:57:02,711 You're gonna be not feeIing great the next 24 hours. 554 00:57:03,086 --> 00:57:04,451 -Thank you, Dr. kipper. -Okay. 555 00:57:04,554 --> 00:57:06,021 You'II probabIy see me in two to three days. 556 00:57:06,122 --> 00:57:07,089 See you in a coupIe of days. 557 00:57:14,597 --> 00:57:16,428 Hey! Hey! Hey! 558 00:57:19,335 --> 00:57:21,303 God damn it! What are you doing? 559 00:57:21,404 --> 00:57:22,996 Hey! Get off, man! 560 00:57:23,106 --> 00:57:25,006 -What's going on here? -Get off! 561 00:57:25,108 --> 00:57:26,302 Get off! 562 00:57:39,088 --> 00:57:40,146 We're in Okinawa 563 00:57:40,256 --> 00:57:42,224 and we're about to go swim with some whaIe sharks. 564 00:57:42,325 --> 00:57:46,352 But first, we need to go rub one out. 565 00:57:51,134 --> 00:57:54,763 Well, l made the mistake of showing them 566 00:57:54,871 --> 00:57:57,499 what sea cucumbers do when they're threatened. 567 00:57:57,607 --> 00:58:00,337 And that is, you know, as soon as something touches them, 568 00:58:01,611 --> 00:58:04,705 these white threads come out of the end of it, 569 00:58:05,081 --> 00:58:09,313 and Steve-O and Chris thought it was a great idea. 570 00:58:09,419 --> 00:58:11,319 So, they're out there trying to... 571 00:58:11,421 --> 00:58:12,911 -Masturbate? -Masturbate. Yeah. 572 00:58:13,022 --> 00:58:15,616 So, anyway, l apologize. 573 00:58:20,730 --> 00:58:22,027 This is the WhaIe Shark Gummer. 574 00:58:24,767 --> 00:58:29,067 With a simpIe shave of the razor, Steve-O easiIy disguises himseIf 575 00:58:29,239 --> 00:58:33,232 to fooI the whaIe sharks into thinking he's a harmIess young boy. 576 00:58:34,344 --> 00:58:37,745 I am pretty nervous about my wiener around that whaIe shark. I reaIIy am. 577 00:58:37,847 --> 00:58:39,314 Now, the best way to think of the whaIe sharks 578 00:58:39,415 --> 00:58:41,679 is they're Iike big puppy dogs. 579 00:58:42,085 --> 00:58:43,950 Sometimes puppies bite. 580 00:58:44,220 --> 00:58:45,653 Yeah, but they have IittIe teeth. 581 00:58:45,755 --> 00:58:46,915 -Puppies, they have IittIe teeth. -LittIe teeth. 582 00:58:47,023 --> 00:58:49,685 -You're gonna get a gummer. -AII right. 583 00:58:49,792 --> 00:58:51,919 So, it's kind of Iike being with a gaI with no teeth. 584 00:58:52,028 --> 00:58:53,757 -kind of, yes. -Yeah. 585 00:58:54,063 --> 00:58:57,396 So right below in these waters, 30-foot whale sharks 586 00:58:57,500 --> 00:58:58,467 are waiting to eat 587 00:58:58,935 --> 00:59:00,334 these freaking shrimp out of our crotches. 588 00:59:00,436 --> 00:59:01,596 Okay. 589 00:59:08,344 --> 00:59:10,642 Oh, they're kind of... They pinch. 590 00:59:10,780 --> 00:59:12,338 Are these aIive? 591 00:59:14,784 --> 00:59:17,412 -They don't feeI good on the way... -You're part of this, man. 592 00:59:19,055 --> 00:59:20,818 Look at this shrimp. 593 00:59:26,362 --> 00:59:28,421 I guess I don't reaIIy have any Iast words. 594 00:59:29,232 --> 00:59:30,494 I'm just gonna kiII myseIf once I Iose my wiener. 595 01:00:21,985 --> 01:00:24,419 My penis is reaIIy smaII now. 596 01:00:26,623 --> 01:00:29,114 I can't reaIIy Iook cooI right now. 597 01:00:36,232 --> 01:00:39,360 Hi. I'm Johnny knoxviIIe. This is the TidaI Wave. 598 01:00:50,580 --> 01:00:52,411 -How'd it Iook? -It Iooked good. 599 01:00:57,086 --> 01:00:59,281 You just got drenched. 600 01:01:04,227 --> 01:01:06,559 I don't even, Iike, pick a tattoo, Iike, 601 01:01:06,663 --> 01:01:10,429 unIess I'm pretty sure that peopIe are gonna Iaugh every time they see it. 602 01:01:11,734 --> 01:01:12,701 Oh, my God, dude. 603 01:01:22,145 --> 01:01:26,138 Like, how do you perform the fucking worId's dumbest tattoo? 604 01:01:27,850 --> 01:01:31,251 Fuck, man. At Ieast I don't have to Iook at it, right? 605 01:01:35,992 --> 01:01:39,985 My name is Henry RoIIins and this is Off-Road Tattoo. 606 01:01:45,735 --> 01:01:46,793 Yeah! 607 01:02:01,184 --> 01:02:03,584 This was designed to fuck you up! 608 01:02:15,031 --> 01:02:16,965 You Christian motherfucker! 609 01:02:31,380 --> 01:02:33,678 It's a totaI smiIey face, dude. 610 01:03:00,209 --> 01:03:02,905 I just fuIIy got a haircut just, Iike, a week ago. 611 01:03:03,012 --> 01:03:04,570 You're about to get many more. 612 01:03:14,157 --> 01:03:16,591 -Yeah, me, too. -I am not doing it. 613 01:03:19,662 --> 01:03:21,129 Look at Ehren. 614 01:03:24,934 --> 01:03:26,162 Oh, shit! 615 01:03:28,371 --> 01:03:31,101 So, we're finding it a IittIe bit chiIIy in Japan. 616 01:03:31,207 --> 01:03:34,438 We're gonna warm ourseIves up with some fireworks. 617 01:03:38,414 --> 01:03:39,847 Let's go, dude. 618 01:03:39,949 --> 01:03:41,974 RoII back there, just a bit. 619 01:03:42,084 --> 01:03:44,917 Oh, no! This is a bad angIe. Switch. 620 01:03:45,254 --> 01:03:46,983 Oh, no, no, no. 621 01:03:48,825 --> 01:03:50,156 Let's see. 622 01:03:59,135 --> 01:04:02,229 Like, an ember feII right in my corn hoIe, dude. 623 01:04:03,773 --> 01:04:06,071 I actuaIIy burned my butt hoIe. 624 01:04:12,515 --> 01:04:15,541 How hard is it to tie a bottIe rocket to a cock? 625 01:04:18,487 --> 01:04:20,546 God, you're compressing it. 626 01:04:49,485 --> 01:04:52,386 You may think this next stunt is impossibIe. 627 01:04:53,256 --> 01:04:55,417 You gotta squat a IittIe, Pontius. 628 01:04:57,326 --> 01:04:59,487 Every time! 629 01:04:59,595 --> 01:05:03,292 -Is Chris' dick shorter or... -Yeah, it's a IittIe shorter. 630 01:05:09,005 --> 01:05:10,734 keep it in! HoId it! 631 01:05:11,240 --> 01:05:12,468 Stick... 632 01:05:16,779 --> 01:05:19,145 It aImost hit Loomis in the face. 633 01:05:29,759 --> 01:05:32,284 God damn, this is the BMX Tug-of-War. 634 01:05:34,964 --> 01:05:36,090 Fuck! 635 01:05:43,306 --> 01:05:45,069 What a dumb-ass idea. 636 01:05:49,545 --> 01:05:51,775 I'm surrounded by cacti. 637 01:05:52,682 --> 01:05:54,616 -For fuck's sake. -Dude, it's a cactus. 638 01:05:54,717 --> 01:05:57,015 -It's cacti! -It's cactus. 639 01:05:57,453 --> 01:05:59,284 Whatever it is, it hurts. 640 01:06:18,007 --> 01:06:19,975 You wanna get up and cross? 641 01:06:31,187 --> 01:06:33,382 This is the YeIIow Snow Cone. 642 01:06:34,724 --> 01:06:37,022 Pack it in there nice and tight. 643 01:06:46,202 --> 01:06:47,965 LittIe coId out here. It might take a second. 644 01:06:48,070 --> 01:06:49,628 Oh! There we go. 645 01:06:54,510 --> 01:06:56,740 -Oh, yeah. -Dude. 646 01:07:02,151 --> 01:07:04,415 I'm not even worried about the pee, I'm just worried about it... 647 01:07:04,620 --> 01:07:06,144 Come on, you're missing the cone, dude! 648 01:07:06,255 --> 01:07:08,348 -I'm sorry. -You're missing the cone! 649 01:07:12,094 --> 01:07:13,721 You better eat that whoIe thing, too. 650 01:07:13,829 --> 01:07:15,456 You gotta go eat that spot, too. 651 01:07:15,564 --> 01:07:17,759 The maIe bonding... 652 01:07:18,300 --> 01:07:20,029 Enjoy the snow cone. 653 01:07:21,303 --> 01:07:23,396 Oh, you just wasted a whoIe bunch! 654 01:07:23,839 --> 01:07:25,704 Just get that whoIe mouthfuI, right there. 655 01:07:25,808 --> 01:07:26,775 keep going. 656 01:07:28,711 --> 01:07:30,144 -keep going! -Eat it! 657 01:07:30,246 --> 01:07:31,213 -Come on, it's your pee. -Dude, swaIIow it! 658 01:07:31,347 --> 01:07:34,145 -Oh, come on. -Hey, I'm trying. It's so coId. 659 01:07:34,250 --> 01:07:36,115 SwaIIow it! SwaIIow it! 660 01:07:36,752 --> 01:07:37,980 Oh, God. 661 01:07:38,187 --> 01:07:39,381 Eat it! Eat it! 662 01:07:39,488 --> 01:07:40,955 SwaIIow it, man! Don't... No, no. 663 01:07:41,057 --> 01:07:42,183 -Oh, no. -Oh, no puking. 664 01:07:42,291 --> 01:07:44,759 -I'm doing it! -Don't Iook at it. 665 01:07:50,699 --> 01:07:52,064 Dude, it's dripping out of the bottom. 666 01:07:52,168 --> 01:07:54,659 WiII you catch that, what's dripping out the bottom? 667 01:08:00,576 --> 01:08:02,168 Oh, my God! 668 01:08:02,278 --> 01:08:04,143 Oh, my God! 669 01:08:15,591 --> 01:08:16,853 -Eat it. Eat it. -This... 670 01:08:16,959 --> 01:08:18,620 -You said that you wouId. -Eat it. 671 01:08:18,727 --> 01:08:20,922 ...is the chocoIate snow cone. 672 01:08:28,771 --> 01:08:31,399 -It stinks. -That sucked. 673 01:08:35,010 --> 01:08:36,409 kick yourseIf in the head, Wee Man. 674 01:08:36,512 --> 01:08:38,605 This guy. He'II do anything just to Iook better. 675 01:09:33,602 --> 01:09:36,901 -No, get away. -Now what is? 676 01:09:37,139 --> 01:09:39,232 Are you starting to Iose your mind on that shit? 677 01:09:39,341 --> 01:09:40,865 Bam, stop it! 678 01:09:40,976 --> 01:09:43,706 Now, you're getting crazy on this shit. 679 01:09:45,447 --> 01:09:46,573 Ape! 680 01:09:47,516 --> 01:09:49,507 He's starting to Iose it! 681 01:09:50,486 --> 01:09:52,317 Jesus Christ! 682 01:09:54,523 --> 01:09:56,491 Ape, I need toiIet paper! 683 01:09:58,794 --> 01:10:00,193 Okay, this is caIIed the GoIf Course Airhorn. 684 01:10:00,295 --> 01:10:01,421 When peopIe tee off, 685 01:10:01,530 --> 01:10:04,021 when they're coming down with their swing, 686 01:10:04,132 --> 01:10:05,861 we're gonna bIow these airhorns. 687 01:10:23,285 --> 01:10:25,583 -Here she goes again. -No. Is it another one? 688 01:10:27,122 --> 01:10:29,420 She stiII hit it reaIIy good. 689 01:10:51,380 --> 01:10:52,779 HoIy shit. 690 01:10:56,551 --> 01:10:58,542 What'd I teII you? What'd I teII you? 691 01:10:58,654 --> 01:11:01,350 Here, you've Iost your cIub. Sorry. 692 01:11:01,657 --> 01:11:04,251 Didn't I teII you I was gonna come over here and kick your ass for that? 693 01:11:04,393 --> 01:11:06,793 What? I'm sorry. I got bursitis. 694 01:11:06,895 --> 01:11:08,089 -You got bursitis? -Yeah. 695 01:11:08,196 --> 01:11:09,857 So, that means you gotta pIay with a horn? 696 01:11:09,965 --> 01:11:12,433 -It heIps. -I'II give you something to pIay with, paI. 697 01:11:12,534 --> 01:11:14,729 Sorry. It won't happen again. 698 01:11:31,086 --> 01:11:32,849 -Oh, fuck! -Shit. He's teeing off! 699 01:11:32,954 --> 01:11:35,149 -Get down! Get down! -Oh, shit! 700 01:11:40,796 --> 01:11:42,593 Get back. Get down, get down. 701 01:11:42,698 --> 01:11:44,563 -Watch this! Wait. Wait. -Get down, Dimitry. 702 01:12:00,182 --> 01:12:02,275 Oh, these things are scary. 703 01:12:05,487 --> 01:12:07,387 -I'm Bam Margera. -I'm Johnny knoxviIIe. 704 01:12:08,590 --> 01:12:10,490 And we're gonna be burgIars today. 705 01:12:19,401 --> 01:12:20,595 Oh, God! 706 01:12:21,269 --> 01:12:22,702 Fuck! Get the diamonds! 707 01:12:22,804 --> 01:12:25,238 Dude, I toId you not to faII off the damn beam. 708 01:12:25,340 --> 01:12:26,705 Turn around! Turn around! 709 01:12:27,042 --> 01:12:28,100 Fuck! 710 01:12:32,314 --> 01:12:33,781 Oh, hoIy fuck! 711 01:12:36,084 --> 01:12:37,210 -Idiot! -What the fuck is that? 712 01:12:40,388 --> 01:12:41,377 Go! 713 01:12:41,923 --> 01:12:43,515 HoIy fuck! 714 01:12:48,263 --> 01:12:49,321 You aII right? 715 01:12:49,431 --> 01:12:51,899 -You okay? -I'm good. I'm good. 716 01:12:52,768 --> 01:12:55,134 -What'd you think happened right there? -It's embarrassing. 717 01:12:55,237 --> 01:12:58,832 I was bareIy haIfway through the ceiIing, and you were aIready out the door. 718 01:12:59,908 --> 01:13:01,808 You were really sprinting. 719 01:13:02,711 --> 01:13:04,770 ReaIIy, guys in masks, I'm out. 720 01:13:04,880 --> 01:13:07,348 I don't pIay. I don't pIay. 721 01:13:11,686 --> 01:13:14,086 Is there any actuaI, Iike, reaI reason 722 01:13:14,189 --> 01:13:16,555 why anyone wouId shove something up their ass Iike this? 723 01:13:16,658 --> 01:13:18,888 -No. -I'm cIaiming predictions for this event. 724 01:13:18,994 --> 01:13:20,985 -Where's Ryan? -Did you make them? 725 01:13:21,096 --> 01:13:22,859 Number one, it's not getting in there. 726 01:13:22,964 --> 01:13:25,524 Number two, even if it does, it's not staying in there. 727 01:13:25,634 --> 01:13:27,329 DefiniteIy no sitting down happening. 728 01:13:27,435 --> 01:13:31,098 Number three, there's no way they're gonna beIieve that this is true. 729 01:13:31,206 --> 01:13:33,174 So, you're saying it's... 730 01:13:33,441 --> 01:13:37,537 I'm saying there's nothing I want more than for this to happen, but... 731 01:13:37,646 --> 01:13:40,206 -You don't want it to happen that much. -No, I reaIIy do. 732 01:13:40,315 --> 01:13:42,715 This is our originaI taIent for this piece, by the way. 733 01:13:42,818 --> 01:13:45,378 -Yeah. I think that... -It's one of the first things I think 734 01:13:45,487 --> 01:13:46,715 I've ever seen you duck out on. 735 01:13:46,822 --> 01:13:49,552 Oh, man, I am so gIad I turned this idea down. 736 01:13:49,658 --> 01:13:51,216 I'm so gIad. 737 01:13:54,095 --> 01:13:56,825 I'II probabIy use aII of this before the end of the segment. 738 01:13:59,768 --> 01:14:01,429 What eIse we got? 739 01:14:01,536 --> 01:14:03,766 A condom. Thank you. 740 01:14:04,840 --> 01:14:07,832 And a IittIe toy car. 741 01:14:08,210 --> 01:14:10,371 BIue, it's my favorite coIor. 742 01:14:12,380 --> 01:14:14,439 Let me see that. DangIe it. 743 01:14:16,651 --> 01:14:18,676 Look at the reservoir tip. 744 01:14:19,821 --> 01:14:22,847 -Now I'm Iubing up... -I can't see the car, Ryan. 745 01:14:22,991 --> 01:14:26,825 ...the IittIe toy car, because I'm going to put it in my butt. 746 01:14:31,833 --> 01:14:33,323 Be comfortabIe. 747 01:14:34,436 --> 01:14:38,736 Hey, Ed's here for rescuing, dude. You're here for making it a probIem. 748 01:14:39,374 --> 01:14:40,602 AII right, you're gonna watch this? 749 01:14:40,709 --> 01:14:42,438 -You're making me uncomfortabIe. -Sorry. 750 01:14:42,544 --> 01:14:44,409 I gotta get another job. 751 01:14:44,512 --> 01:14:47,504 -Lube up your corn hoIe. -I am. I'm spackIing. 752 01:14:48,350 --> 01:14:49,749 ''SpackIing.'' 753 01:14:49,851 --> 01:14:52,513 -Heart rate's going up for sure! -Oh, dude, it hurts. 754 01:14:52,621 --> 01:14:54,054 Your adrenaIine's fIowing, isn't it? 755 01:14:54,155 --> 01:14:56,783 There's no getting around it, it fucking hurts Iike heII. 756 01:14:56,892 --> 01:14:58,325 Come on in, Manny. 757 01:14:58,426 --> 01:14:59,893 You're just in time, Manny. 758 01:14:59,995 --> 01:15:02,657 Oh, Manny. TeII me I'm a man. 759 01:15:04,566 --> 01:15:07,535 -Hey, man, he's got it... -It feeIs so goddamn gross. 760 01:15:08,036 --> 01:15:09,901 This is totaIIy insane. 761 01:15:10,605 --> 01:15:12,573 -I thinks it's breathing. -WheeIs in? 762 01:15:12,674 --> 01:15:13,641 It's in, dude. 763 01:15:13,775 --> 01:15:15,037 -It's in? -Yeah. 764 01:15:15,143 --> 01:15:16,906 -Let's see. -Oh, fuck! 765 01:15:17,145 --> 01:15:19,545 I feeI Iike I have to shit my ass. 766 01:15:19,648 --> 01:15:21,616 Is there anything in tap? 767 01:15:23,618 --> 01:15:26,519 No, this don't happen in nature, dude. This is insane. 768 01:15:26,621 --> 01:15:28,816 ''This doesn't happen in nature.'' 769 01:15:33,161 --> 01:15:37,222 You said that you didn't want to do it because your dad wouId disown you? 770 01:15:37,332 --> 01:15:38,799 WeII, I mean, it wasn't that. 771 01:15:38,900 --> 01:15:41,334 You drank wine off of a dude's ass crack. 772 01:15:41,436 --> 01:15:45,372 My dad never saw that. I never toId him that, you know. 773 01:15:45,740 --> 01:15:47,765 I was gonna do this and I was Iike, ''Dad...'' 774 01:15:47,876 --> 01:15:51,141 I was Iike, ''Dad, we're going hard these days, 775 01:15:51,246 --> 01:15:53,476 ''and there's some ideas fIoating around.'' 776 01:15:53,581 --> 01:15:55,674 I just mentioned the car in the butt. 777 01:15:55,784 --> 01:15:59,743 My dad, Iike... The onIy time in my Iife I ever heard my dad, Iike... 778 01:15:59,854 --> 01:16:01,287 You know, it's Iike when your parents say, 779 01:16:01,389 --> 01:16:04,586 ''I'm not mad at you, I'm just disappointed,'' you know. 780 01:16:04,693 --> 01:16:07,355 Like, that hurts so much more, you know? 781 01:16:07,929 --> 01:16:09,294 Fucking rad. 782 01:16:10,832 --> 01:16:11,992 Look at him waIk. 783 01:16:12,100 --> 01:16:13,965 Dunn's gonna win, dude. 784 01:16:14,436 --> 01:16:15,926 I'm not too excited about this skit. 785 01:16:16,037 --> 01:16:19,336 It's not my favorite I've ever done, because there's a toy car in my butt. 786 01:16:19,441 --> 01:16:21,534 But this is the Butt X-ray. 787 01:16:27,949 --> 01:16:29,883 I think I need an x-ray. 788 01:16:30,085 --> 01:16:31,643 -Antoine? -Yes? 789 01:16:33,021 --> 01:16:35,114 -How you doing? -Pretty good. 790 01:16:36,458 --> 01:16:38,722 -I'm Ryan, and this is... -What can I do for you? 791 01:16:38,827 --> 01:16:40,988 I was partying Iast night with some frat guys. 792 01:16:41,096 --> 01:16:42,825 I passed out. I must've faIIen down and broken something, 793 01:16:44,099 --> 01:16:46,158 'cause I haven't been abIe to waIk right since. 794 01:16:46,267 --> 01:16:47,859 We're gonna take x-ray now, to be sure. 795 01:16:47,969 --> 01:16:48,936 Okay. 796 01:16:49,504 --> 01:16:51,699 -Take a... -Oh, okay. 797 01:16:54,075 --> 01:16:55,235 This is comfy. 798 01:16:55,343 --> 01:16:57,504 HoId your breath. Don't move. 799 01:17:37,218 --> 01:17:39,880 -What is that? -I have no idea. 800 01:17:40,121 --> 01:17:43,420 That's not part of you. That's something extra. 801 01:17:43,625 --> 01:17:45,718 I wouId've known if I ate that. 802 01:17:45,827 --> 01:17:48,523 No. You wouIdn't be abIe to swaIIow that. 803 01:17:48,863 --> 01:17:50,387 That is a car toy. 804 01:17:50,498 --> 01:17:54,195 -WeII, how did a car toy get there? -Maybe you stuck it up your ass. 805 01:17:54,302 --> 01:17:56,566 I didn't stick anything up my ass. 806 01:17:56,671 --> 01:18:01,074 -Have you ever seen anything Iike that? -No, I never seen that in there. 807 01:18:01,443 --> 01:18:05,846 I've seen a toy car aII over, but never in somebody's rectum. 808 01:18:06,314 --> 01:18:08,839 -You can't get it out? You don't have... -No. 809 01:18:08,950 --> 01:18:12,943 I'm a physician, but I practice this, x-ray, onIy. 810 01:18:13,688 --> 01:18:16,748 You think maybe I can just, you know, poop it out? 811 01:18:16,858 --> 01:18:19,190 You won't be abIe to poop it out. 812 01:18:19,294 --> 01:18:21,319 In fact, it wiII hurt you. 813 01:18:21,429 --> 01:18:24,262 In fact, I don't think it's even good for you 814 01:18:24,365 --> 01:18:25,491 that you poop it out. 815 01:18:25,600 --> 01:18:28,899 What wiII happen if you take Ex-Lax? WiII that heIp? 816 01:18:29,237 --> 01:18:30,670 No, if he takes Ex-Lax, 817 01:18:30,772 --> 01:18:33,502 weII, he gets a Iot of diarrhea, but no car. 818 01:18:44,719 --> 01:18:46,914 I appreciate it. Thank you for taking care of me. 819 01:18:47,021 --> 01:18:48,147 -Okay. -Thanks again. 820 01:18:48,923 --> 01:18:52,017 You know, it's not that easy trying to get this thing out as it is. 821 01:18:52,127 --> 01:18:53,890 EspeciaIIy with aII you guys fucking staring at me. 822 01:18:53,995 --> 01:18:57,123 Fucking peanut gaIIery whiIe I'm trying to crap. 823 01:18:58,399 --> 01:19:00,799 -Oh, shit! -Get down there and fiIm Iow. 824 01:19:00,902 --> 01:19:03,029 That sounded Iike an injury. 825 01:19:04,606 --> 01:19:06,836 -Did it come out? -It's coming. 826 01:19:07,642 --> 01:19:09,371 Everyone, be quiet. 827 01:19:11,146 --> 01:19:12,636 Oh, that hurt so bad. 828 01:19:12,747 --> 01:19:15,682 -Let me see it. HoId it up. -Something broke. 829 01:19:16,384 --> 01:19:17,817 I'm bIeeding. 830 01:19:18,319 --> 01:19:20,810 -Let's see it. Let's see it. -Not that bad. 831 01:19:40,208 --> 01:19:41,334 He's aIive! 832 01:19:42,577 --> 01:19:44,977 Oh, Johnny knoxviIIe. He made it. 833 01:19:46,047 --> 01:19:47,605 Oh, there is a God. 834 01:19:47,715 --> 01:19:49,012 Oh, pIease. 835 01:19:49,117 --> 01:19:51,813 And at Iast! I thought it wouId never... 836 01:19:53,021 --> 01:19:54,579 This is the end! 837 01:19:54,789 --> 01:19:56,950 Oh, thank you, Jesus! 838 01:19:58,960 --> 01:20:00,257 Oh, chiId! 839 01:20:02,430 --> 01:20:05,228 -Let's see it! Let's see it! -Not that bad. 840 01:20:39,400 --> 01:20:40,367 Oh, shit! 841 01:20:47,175 --> 01:20:48,472 Oh, fuck! 842 01:21:08,896 --> 01:21:09,863 Bam, what the... 843 01:21:42,230 --> 01:21:45,688 Whose dick do I gotta suck to get some expIosions around here? 844 01:22:30,211 --> 01:22:31,838 It's got a boner. 845 01:22:37,518 --> 01:22:40,510 Oh! Oh, fuck! 846 01:22:42,724 --> 01:22:44,214 That's a man. 847 01:23:01,342 --> 01:23:02,468 Gator wrestIing. 848 01:23:09,951 --> 01:23:11,646 For fuck's sake, come here! 849 01:23:11,753 --> 01:23:13,653 Hurry up. Hurry up. 850 01:23:14,889 --> 01:23:16,049 Hurry! 851 01:23:24,766 --> 01:23:27,496 We wanted to see if you wouId run here with a car up your ass. 852 01:23:27,602 --> 01:23:29,763 No, I ain't running anywhere. 853 01:23:32,774 --> 01:23:34,469 It's scary enough to waIk. 854 01:23:35,076 --> 01:23:37,544 You're nice. You're a good man. 855 01:23:38,579 --> 01:23:41,070 -Want to come over for dinner? -No, that's okay. 856 01:23:41,182 --> 01:23:45,118 -You know how to operate it now? -Yeah, I think so. I think so. 857 01:23:47,422 --> 01:23:49,151 -I need heIp. -Yeah. 858 01:24:05,907 --> 01:24:08,501 The smiIey face is a compIete cruciaI. 859 01:24:09,377 --> 01:24:10,435 What did I say? 860 01:24:10,545 --> 01:24:11,637 -Fuck. -Fuck. 861 01:24:11,746 --> 01:24:12,770 I didn't say the ''F'' word. 862 01:24:12,880 --> 01:24:13,972 Yeah, you did. You said ''fuck.'' 863 01:24:14,081 --> 01:24:17,448 -Don't worry, we'II bIeep it. -I did? Can we cut that out? 864 01:24:21,856 --> 01:24:24,552 -It's aII right. -It Iooks fine. It Iooks normaI. 865 01:24:31,065 --> 01:24:33,693 I think it says ''fuck'' on my forehead. 866 01:24:34,669 --> 01:24:38,901 -They don't have a taiI? -No! They must have... 867 01:24:44,979 --> 01:24:46,674 Show him the x-ray. 868 01:24:55,122 --> 01:24:58,023 I mean, trust me, dude, I'm not unimpressed. 869 01:25:19,747 --> 01:25:20,907 Fuck! 870 01:25:21,816 --> 01:25:25,616 The next time, we can do Son of Jackass. 871 01:25:25,720 --> 01:25:26,948 Son... 872 01:27:30,211 --> 01:27:31,576 Yeah, dude. 63740

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