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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,000 --> 00:00:02,960 [swing music playing] 2 00:00:03,040 --> 00:00:04,480 -[knocking] -[Trish] Mmm. 3 00:00:05,040 --> 00:00:07,240 Right, we're all ready for the briefing. 4 00:00:07,320 --> 00:00:09,960 -This is from Chris. -"Chris" Chris? Your ex Chris? 5 00:00:10,040 --> 00:00:12,960 -Yes. Chris. Is there another Chris? -Okay, I'm just going to go. 6 00:00:13,040 --> 00:00:15,640 -It's no big deal, I'll open it later. -Cool. 7 00:00:15,720 --> 00:00:17,640 [Trish] I'm not even blummin' bothered what it is. 8 00:00:17,720 --> 00:00:19,640 I'll just pop it in my in-tray. 9 00:00:20,360 --> 00:00:23,000 -[Karl] Mm-hmm. Yeah, I just-- -Actually, I may as well open it now. 10 00:00:26,640 --> 00:00:27,880 Simple Minds. 11 00:00:29,400 --> 00:00:30,320 He remembered. 12 00:00:33,040 --> 00:00:37,720 Something's come up, Karl, and I'll need a bit of head space today. 13 00:00:38,760 --> 00:00:42,400 -I'm making you acting manager. -What? No. 14 00:00:42,480 --> 00:00:44,880 No, thanks. I don't think I can be acting manager. 15 00:00:44,960 --> 00:00:47,520 -Don't worry, you're ready. -But no one likes you if you're manager. 16 00:00:47,600 --> 00:00:50,400 [Trish] Don't be silly. People like me, don't they? Do they? 17 00:00:51,440 --> 00:00:56,400 Yeah, yeah. I just mean I won't do it as well as you. No one will listen to me. 18 00:00:56,480 --> 00:01:00,480 Then make yourself heard. If you do not throw a stone, the pool will not ripple. 19 00:01:01,320 --> 00:01:03,280 -What pool? -[Trish] Thanks, Karl. 20 00:01:04,760 --> 00:01:06,160 You're my special number two. 21 00:01:08,120 --> 00:01:09,920 [swing music playing] 22 00:01:10,360 --> 00:01:12,400 ♪ Bring me sunshine ♪ 23 00:01:13,480 --> 00:01:15,000 ♪ In your smile ♪ 24 00:01:16,680 --> 00:01:18,000 ♪ Bring me laughter ♪ 25 00:01:19,520 --> 00:01:21,160 ♪ All the while ♪ 26 00:01:22,680 --> 00:01:28,400 ♪ In this world where we live There should be more happiness ♪ 27 00:01:28,960 --> 00:01:30,360 ♪ So much joy... ♪ 28 00:01:30,440 --> 00:01:33,080 Apparently, we're running low on copier paper. 29 00:01:33,160 --> 00:01:35,480 So essential use only. 30 00:01:35,920 --> 00:01:38,000 That's been underlined, so it must be important. 31 00:01:38,080 --> 00:01:40,760 Other than that, just, you know... carry on as normal. 32 00:01:40,840 --> 00:01:42,160 Do we have to call you "Sir"? 33 00:01:42,240 --> 00:01:44,800 -No, just Karl. -Sir Karl? 34 00:01:44,880 --> 00:01:46,880 [Paul] Can we knock off early? 35 00:01:46,960 --> 00:01:48,680 -If it was up to me-- -It is up to you. 36 00:01:49,440 --> 00:01:52,160 -We'll strike if you don't let us. -Then I'll sack you all. 37 00:01:54,680 --> 00:01:55,680 That was a joke. 38 00:01:55,760 --> 00:01:59,080 I don't understand why you're acting manager. 39 00:01:59,160 --> 00:02:00,560 I think Trish is just really busy-- 40 00:02:00,640 --> 00:02:04,360 [Angela] No, I don't understand why you're acting manager. 41 00:02:04,440 --> 00:02:05,640 Because I am... 42 00:02:07,760 --> 00:02:09,680 [clears throat] Because I am. 43 00:02:10,160 --> 00:02:11,480 Oh. Right. 44 00:02:13,160 --> 00:02:17,200 So she's written here that we're breaking at 4:30 for cards and presents. 45 00:02:17,280 --> 00:02:20,520 -Who for, Sir Karl? -Oh, my giddy aunt, it's her birthday. 46 00:02:20,600 --> 00:02:21,880 It's Trish's birthday. 47 00:02:21,960 --> 00:02:25,520 How could I forget? Same day I had my hysterectomy. 48 00:02:26,080 --> 00:02:27,400 Happy anniversary. 49 00:02:27,480 --> 00:02:29,200 Why don't we get her a card and present? 50 00:02:29,280 --> 00:02:30,880 It needs to be something special. 51 00:02:32,480 --> 00:02:34,040 Smelly candle? 52 00:02:34,120 --> 00:02:36,840 What about one of them day experiences. 53 00:02:36,920 --> 00:02:39,320 You know, "swim with dolphins," that type of thing. 54 00:02:39,400 --> 00:02:40,560 [George] I wouldn't. 55 00:02:40,640 --> 00:02:44,960 My mate's missus did that in Florida and the dolphin touched her up... 56 00:02:46,320 --> 00:02:47,560 with his nose. 57 00:02:47,640 --> 00:02:49,840 [Danielle] Shall I put that down as a maybe then? 58 00:02:50,440 --> 00:02:53,720 -Can we go? -Oh, right, yes. Go! Go get them! 59 00:02:55,240 --> 00:02:56,880 [Paul] Karl, little favour to ask. 60 00:02:56,960 --> 00:02:59,480 I need to store a few rolls of carpet in here later. 61 00:02:59,560 --> 00:03:01,200 -How many? -Two or three. 62 00:03:01,280 --> 00:03:02,240 Well, is it two or three? 63 00:03:02,800 --> 00:03:06,560 It's eight. Lovely job this, massive house, all cream. 64 00:03:07,200 --> 00:03:08,080 They haven't got kids. 65 00:03:08,160 --> 00:03:10,040 I don't think Trish would be too pleased with that. 66 00:03:10,120 --> 00:03:13,360 Obviously, I don't care, pff, whatever. [chuckles] But Trish would. 67 00:03:13,920 --> 00:03:15,160 I won't tell, if you don't. 68 00:03:15,240 --> 00:03:17,400 But there won't be anything to tell though will there? 69 00:03:17,480 --> 00:03:19,920 Trust me, Karl There won't be nothing to tell. 70 00:03:20,640 --> 00:03:22,720 [swing music playing] 71 00:03:22,800 --> 00:03:24,320 [mobile phone dialling] 72 00:03:24,400 --> 00:03:26,440 Hi, Chris, it's Trish. 73 00:03:26,520 --> 00:03:29,880 Look, I just wanted to say-- 74 00:03:29,960 --> 00:03:31,960 [female voice] At the tone, please, record your message. 75 00:03:32,040 --> 00:03:33,040 [beep] 76 00:03:33,120 --> 00:03:37,440 Hi, Chris, it's Tris-- Sorry, no, it's Chris. 77 00:03:37,520 --> 00:03:41,000 No. [chuckles] Sorry, you're Chris, I'm Trish. 78 00:03:41,080 --> 00:03:45,520 Sorry, start again. Um, I just wanted to say-- 79 00:03:45,600 --> 00:03:46,760 [phone rings] 80 00:03:49,000 --> 00:03:54,880 I just wanted to say, thank you for the "Minds" CD. 81 00:03:55,720 --> 00:03:58,000 I know what this means. 82 00:03:58,080 --> 00:04:01,640 [woman] Trish? It's Mum. Something's wrong with the oven. 83 00:04:02,880 --> 00:04:06,280 I think we, um... we need to talk, don't you? 84 00:04:07,200 --> 00:04:11,640 I've cleared my diary for the day. I'll be in our usual place at one. 85 00:04:14,640 --> 00:04:15,560 All right then, see you. 86 00:04:17,880 --> 00:04:23,760 Karl... as acting manager, there's a problem you need to deal with. 87 00:04:26,680 --> 00:04:32,400 So sorry to keep you waiting, Mrs Carter. This is Karl, he's acting as manager. 88 00:04:32,480 --> 00:04:34,720 -How can I help? -I had a capability assessment 89 00:04:34,800 --> 00:04:36,480 and they say I'm fit for work, but I'm not. 90 00:04:36,560 --> 00:04:39,760 -She's got osteoarthritis, Karl. -[Dawn] They tested me on a good day. 91 00:04:39,840 --> 00:04:41,240 Just because she can do it once 92 00:04:41,320 --> 00:04:43,840 -doesn't mean she can do it all the time. -Right, okay. 93 00:04:43,920 --> 00:04:45,800 As acting manager, what can you do about that? 94 00:04:45,880 --> 00:04:47,760 [Dawn] I can't afford to lose my benefits. 95 00:04:47,840 --> 00:04:49,440 [Angela] She needs money to live on, Karl. 96 00:04:51,000 --> 00:04:55,480 -Well, you can appeal. -And in your experience as acting manager 97 00:04:56,240 --> 00:04:57,560 how long will she have to wait? 98 00:04:59,840 --> 00:05:01,680 -Up to six months. -Six months? 99 00:05:01,760 --> 00:05:02,880 It's terrible. 100 00:05:02,960 --> 00:05:04,920 -I don't make the rules. -But you're the manager. 101 00:05:05,000 --> 00:05:05,840 Acting manager. 102 00:05:05,920 --> 00:05:08,240 [Janette] Karl, love, have you got a minute? 103 00:05:08,320 --> 00:05:09,160 Yes. 104 00:05:10,160 --> 00:05:13,000 [Janette] People have been waiting ages, they're getting fed up. 105 00:05:13,080 --> 00:05:15,200 Even Graham's looking restless. 106 00:05:15,280 --> 00:05:17,080 And I'm on my own. 107 00:05:17,160 --> 00:05:19,920 -Is Paul not around? -I'll try him. 108 00:05:21,160 --> 00:05:23,200 Hang on, the doo-dah's knackered. 109 00:05:23,280 --> 00:05:25,760 Excuse me, Karl. I've got a bit of a problem. 110 00:05:25,840 --> 00:05:30,080 Mother Hen to Balls of Steel, what is your position, please? 111 00:05:30,160 --> 00:05:31,160 -Karl? -Mmm? 112 00:05:31,240 --> 00:05:35,040 [Janette] Mother Hen to Balls of Steel what is your position, please? 113 00:05:35,120 --> 00:05:37,360 -Keep coming. -[Janette] Mother Hen to Balls of Steel? 114 00:05:37,440 --> 00:05:38,720 Bit more. 115 00:05:40,080 --> 00:05:41,000 Bit more. 116 00:05:41,080 --> 00:05:42,840 -[loud thud] -[alarm wails] 117 00:05:42,920 --> 00:05:44,120 Bit less. 118 00:05:44,200 --> 00:05:46,880 [Graham] Then, right, I got up on the Saturday morning 119 00:05:46,960 --> 00:05:48,560 and the squirrel was there again. 120 00:05:49,280 --> 00:05:51,720 So I let him into my flat and I've called him Steven. 121 00:05:51,800 --> 00:05:53,080 Oh, yeah. 122 00:05:53,160 --> 00:05:56,000 I did give him some crisps that I had in the fridge, but he didn't like them. 123 00:05:56,680 --> 00:05:58,680 I think because they were salt and vinegar. 124 00:05:59,400 --> 00:06:01,320 Squirrels don't like vinegar... 125 00:06:02,000 --> 00:06:03,120 or salt... 126 00:06:04,160 --> 00:06:05,600 or crisps. 127 00:06:06,760 --> 00:06:08,040 Sorry, Graham, what did you want? 128 00:06:08,120 --> 00:06:09,800 That's what I'm getting to, Karl. 129 00:06:09,880 --> 00:06:12,640 I should have signed on over an hour ago, because I have got to get back. 130 00:06:12,720 --> 00:06:15,480 Because I shut Steven in the airing cupboard to sleep. 131 00:06:15,920 --> 00:06:17,280 I think he might need the toilet. 132 00:06:18,040 --> 00:06:20,000 -Who are you booked in with? -Danielle. 133 00:06:21,000 --> 00:06:23,000 -Danielle. -Sir Karl, look at this. 134 00:06:23,080 --> 00:06:25,520 We're getting Trish a photo cake. It's perfect. 135 00:06:25,600 --> 00:06:28,560 [Karl] Yeah. Have you been doing any work this morning, Dan? 136 00:06:28,640 --> 00:06:30,680 Only Graham's been waiting to sign on for ages. 137 00:06:30,760 --> 00:06:33,880 Give us a chance, I've been working finding Trish a prezzie. 138 00:06:33,960 --> 00:06:35,200 She is going to love this. 139 00:06:35,280 --> 00:06:37,120 [George] I know for a fact they do it in Asda. 140 00:06:37,200 --> 00:06:38,720 -We need a picture of her. -Karl. 141 00:06:38,800 --> 00:06:41,480 -Just a minute. -[George] I'll can get a picture of her 142 00:06:41,560 --> 00:06:43,120 and she won't even know I've taken it. 143 00:06:43,200 --> 00:06:44,800 -How you going to do that? -So anyway-- 144 00:06:44,880 --> 00:06:47,360 [George] I take secret pictures of people every day. 145 00:06:47,440 --> 00:06:50,400 -Do you now? -In my capacity as a fraud officer. 146 00:06:50,480 --> 00:06:52,560 -Uh... Danielle-- -Karl. 147 00:06:53,360 --> 00:06:55,840 Hold on. Seriously, just get back to work. 148 00:06:55,920 --> 00:06:57,120 [cracks a whip] 149 00:06:57,600 --> 00:06:58,960 How'd you get a cake in a printer? 150 00:06:59,040 --> 00:07:01,760 Danielle, they don't put the whole cake in the printer. 151 00:07:02,640 --> 00:07:03,960 They just put the icing through. 152 00:07:04,040 --> 00:07:05,920 -Karl. -What do you want? 153 00:07:06,000 --> 00:07:07,720 Sorry, what do you want? 154 00:07:09,760 --> 00:07:12,080 Mrs Carter has glued herself to my desk. 155 00:07:15,480 --> 00:07:17,520 I'm not going anywhere until I get my benefits sorted. 156 00:07:19,840 --> 00:07:21,240 Thanks for all your help. 157 00:07:23,880 --> 00:07:25,640 [Karl sighs] Great... 158 00:07:31,120 --> 00:07:32,360 All right, Trish, you called me? 159 00:07:32,440 --> 00:07:33,760 -No, I didn't. -No? My mistake. 160 00:07:33,840 --> 00:07:35,720 What's this? Just got a text. 161 00:07:37,000 --> 00:07:40,320 -What? -Sorry, it's a long text. 162 00:07:40,400 --> 00:07:43,480 George, can I ask you a hypothetical question? 163 00:07:43,560 --> 00:07:45,600 -[George] Free country, fire away. -[camera clicks] 164 00:07:45,680 --> 00:07:50,480 [Trish] Imagine there was a woman who worked very, very hard. 165 00:07:50,560 --> 00:07:52,840 So hard, in fact, she was rarely at home. 166 00:07:52,920 --> 00:07:57,360 And her husband ended up having a sexual affair 167 00:07:57,440 --> 00:08:00,720 with, let's just say for argument's sake, a spiteful little tramp 168 00:08:00,800 --> 00:08:02,880 -who works in a leisure centre. -I'm listening. 169 00:08:02,960 --> 00:08:09,280 And when this woman found out about the affair she was... very sad 170 00:08:09,360 --> 00:08:13,560 medically and she did some silly things, which she now regrets. 171 00:08:13,640 --> 00:08:15,360 -Like what? -Oh, you know. 172 00:08:15,440 --> 00:08:17,600 Silent phone calls in the night, followed him in to work 173 00:08:17,680 --> 00:08:19,480 went through his bins, that kind of thing. 174 00:08:19,560 --> 00:08:23,680 -What? -But now time has moved on 175 00:08:23,760 --> 00:08:27,480 and he has made it clear he would like to try again. 176 00:08:27,560 --> 00:08:30,680 -And she feels ready to forgive. -Why? 177 00:08:31,560 --> 00:08:33,000 Because she feels stronger-- 178 00:08:33,080 --> 00:08:36,000 No, why does he want to get back with her? She sounds like a nutjob. 179 00:08:36,080 --> 00:08:38,200 He should stick with the bird from the leisure centre. 180 00:08:38,280 --> 00:08:39,880 Well he's not going to do that, is he? 181 00:08:39,960 --> 00:08:42,760 Because she's not his soul mate and she will never be, okay? 182 00:08:43,720 --> 00:08:44,680 [softly] Okay. 183 00:08:45,560 --> 00:08:46,680 Well, thanks then. 184 00:08:52,240 --> 00:08:53,080 [chuckles] 185 00:08:57,480 --> 00:08:58,320 Oh, no. 186 00:09:00,000 --> 00:09:01,000 Oh, Trish. 187 00:09:01,760 --> 00:09:03,080 [soft blues] 188 00:09:09,560 --> 00:09:11,280 Where is Paul? Can you radio him again. 189 00:09:11,360 --> 00:09:14,400 -I can't get it off my belt, Karl. -Let me have a go. 190 00:09:14,480 --> 00:09:16,040 [Dawn] I'll warn you now, love 191 00:09:16,120 --> 00:09:18,400 I'm not letting anyone move me until you give me what I need. 192 00:09:18,480 --> 00:09:20,640 [Angela] You're in for a long wait then. Because we do not 193 00:09:20,720 --> 00:09:23,440 and will not negotiate with terrorists. 194 00:09:23,520 --> 00:09:26,040 Terrorists? I thought you were on my side. 195 00:09:26,120 --> 00:09:28,640 You're going to rip my trousers. 196 00:09:28,720 --> 00:09:32,040 -We've got to pay for these ourselves. -Fine. 197 00:09:33,240 --> 00:09:34,840 -Hello, Paul? -He won't answer 198 00:09:34,920 --> 00:09:36,480 unless you use his handle. 199 00:09:37,440 --> 00:09:38,760 [sighs heavily] 200 00:09:39,880 --> 00:09:42,520 Balls of Steel, where are you? 201 00:09:42,600 --> 00:09:45,080 -Well, I'm not down there. [chuckles] -Where have you been? 202 00:09:45,160 --> 00:09:47,040 Getting in that carpet, it looks like rain. 203 00:09:47,120 --> 00:09:50,080 -Oh, yeah, it smells when it's wet. -But I said you couldn't. 204 00:09:50,160 --> 00:09:52,200 No, you said Trish wouldn't like it. 205 00:09:52,280 --> 00:09:54,000 Yeah, but I meant I wouldn't like it. 206 00:09:54,080 --> 00:09:56,280 You can't store eight rolls of carpet in the learning room. 207 00:09:56,360 --> 00:09:59,000 It's more like 15, what with the underlay. [chuckles] 208 00:09:59,640 --> 00:10:01,040 This is all one big joke to you, is it? 209 00:10:01,120 --> 00:10:05,200 Well, how about this for a joke: you've got a verbal warning. Ha ha ha. 210 00:10:05,760 --> 00:10:08,800 -I don't get it. -[Karl] I mean it. Verbal warning. 211 00:10:08,880 --> 00:10:12,120 -Don't be daft, Karl, you can't do that. -You want one as well? 212 00:10:12,680 --> 00:10:16,760 Don't you cheek me, young man. I've got knickers older than you. 213 00:10:16,840 --> 00:10:18,600 [muffled music] 214 00:10:21,920 --> 00:10:24,040 ["Alive and Kicking" playing] 215 00:10:26,720 --> 00:10:29,080 -What are you doing? -Look at this. 216 00:10:31,640 --> 00:10:36,720 "Trish. we found this under the car seat. We don't want it." Chris and Paula. 217 00:10:36,800 --> 00:10:39,720 [Trish] I thought he'd remembered my special day. I thought he'd realised 218 00:10:39,800 --> 00:10:42,800 he'd made a mistake and wanted to give our marriage a second try. 219 00:10:44,680 --> 00:10:46,680 Still, at least you got your CD back. 220 00:10:47,960 --> 00:10:49,880 I'm meeting him in an hour. What do I say? What do I do? 221 00:10:49,960 --> 00:10:52,360 I've made a complete boob of myself. 222 00:10:56,760 --> 00:10:58,480 Come with me, to the pub. 223 00:10:59,040 --> 00:11:01,560 Pretend you're with me. It'd kill him to see me with someone else. 224 00:11:01,640 --> 00:11:04,760 -Would it? -Yes! Someone young and fit, he'd hate it. 225 00:11:06,600 --> 00:11:07,720 Oh, but the thing is... 226 00:11:08,600 --> 00:11:12,280 I've just given Paul a verbal warning and a woman's glued herself to Angela's desk. 227 00:11:12,360 --> 00:11:15,160 [Trish] Karl, I love the way you've thrown yourself into this role 228 00:11:15,240 --> 00:11:19,320 but some things are more important than being manager of this job centre. 229 00:11:19,400 --> 00:11:21,240 [Karl] If I leave, who's going to be in charge? 230 00:11:23,000 --> 00:11:27,120 Manager? Are you joking? I get ID'd buying scissors. 231 00:11:27,200 --> 00:11:29,360 -You'll be fine. -How come you get to go to the pub? 232 00:11:29,440 --> 00:11:31,160 -I don't want to go. -[Danielle] I'll go then. 233 00:11:31,240 --> 00:11:33,000 You can't, you're manager. 234 00:11:34,320 --> 00:11:35,680 Can I give myself the afternoon off? 235 00:11:36,240 --> 00:11:39,120 Oh, please, Dan, it's you or Angela. 236 00:11:40,800 --> 00:11:44,160 Fine, I'll do it. You go and be teacher's pet. 237 00:11:44,240 --> 00:11:48,320 -I'm not teacher's pet. -Come on, Karl. Your coat. 238 00:11:48,400 --> 00:11:50,760 [swing music playing] 239 00:12:00,480 --> 00:12:01,880 What does Chris look like? 240 00:12:01,960 --> 00:12:05,160 He's a fireman. Someone's coming, look like you're having a good time. 241 00:12:05,240 --> 00:12:06,480 -How? -Just laugh. 242 00:12:06,560 --> 00:12:08,760 [laughs awkwardly] We're having a good time. 243 00:12:12,760 --> 00:12:14,840 -He is definitely coming, isn't he? -Yes. 244 00:12:14,920 --> 00:12:17,200 You spoke to him, and he said he was coming? 245 00:12:18,000 --> 00:12:20,800 -Not to him, I left a message. -[door squeaks open] 246 00:12:20,880 --> 00:12:25,000 [laughing awkwardly] We're enjoying ourselves. 247 00:12:28,360 --> 00:12:30,720 -So you've not heard from him at all? -No. 248 00:12:32,040 --> 00:12:33,280 Oh, Trish... 249 00:12:34,560 --> 00:12:36,080 I don't think he's coming. 250 00:12:36,640 --> 00:12:37,880 [door squeaks open] 251 00:12:41,120 --> 00:12:41,960 No. 252 00:12:43,120 --> 00:12:46,640 I'm sorry, Karl. I had to come just in case. 253 00:12:48,480 --> 00:12:51,200 Do you know what it's like being on your own? It's lonely. 254 00:12:51,800 --> 00:12:53,840 Going to sleep and waking up in an empty flat. 255 00:12:53,920 --> 00:12:55,800 Buying dinner for one. 256 00:12:55,880 --> 00:12:57,960 Keep having the same meal two nights in a row because-- 257 00:12:58,040 --> 00:13:00,840 -Everything comes in twin packs. -Yes. 258 00:13:07,840 --> 00:13:09,480 [sighs heavily] What do you want? 259 00:13:11,560 --> 00:13:14,000 I will have a Jägerbomb. 260 00:13:17,120 --> 00:13:19,360 [swing music playing] 261 00:13:22,240 --> 00:13:24,960 Like it explains in the letter, you are no longer eligible to sign on 262 00:13:25,040 --> 00:13:27,600 because your partner's income exceeds the threshold. 263 00:13:27,680 --> 00:13:30,160 [Darren] Like I've been saying, I'm not married. 264 00:13:30,600 --> 00:13:32,760 You know all this, I've been signing on for ages. 265 00:13:32,840 --> 00:13:36,680 According to the system, you married a Susan Braithwate in 1974. 266 00:13:37,720 --> 00:13:39,600 I wasn't born in 1974. 267 00:13:39,680 --> 00:13:41,720 Well, I can only deal with the information I've got. 268 00:13:41,800 --> 00:13:44,280 [Dawn] Come on, that's obviously a mistake. 269 00:13:44,760 --> 00:13:47,840 -Thank you. -[Angela] I'm sorry, this is confidential. 270 00:13:48,400 --> 00:13:51,280 I don't even know a Susan Braithwate. She's not my wife. 271 00:13:51,360 --> 00:13:52,400 You'll need to prove that. 272 00:13:52,480 --> 00:13:54,280 -[Dawn] How's he meant to do that? -Yeah, how? 273 00:13:54,360 --> 00:13:58,080 -You need to get her to sign something. -To prove she doesn't exist? 274 00:13:58,680 --> 00:13:59,680 Waste of time. 275 00:14:00,600 --> 00:14:02,440 Glued yourself to the wrong desk, love. 276 00:14:02,520 --> 00:14:04,200 [swing music playing] 277 00:14:09,480 --> 00:14:11,680 We shouldn't be doing this. It's breaking and entering. 278 00:14:11,760 --> 00:14:14,040 It's not breaking and entering. It's still half my house. 279 00:14:14,120 --> 00:14:14,920 I'm still on the deeds. 280 00:14:15,600 --> 00:14:17,480 [lock rattling] 281 00:14:17,560 --> 00:14:20,240 [Trish] They've changed the locks. Why would they change the locks? 282 00:14:20,320 --> 00:14:22,040 -In case you try to break in? -She's done this. 283 00:14:22,120 --> 00:14:24,160 She's turning Chris against me. 284 00:14:24,760 --> 00:14:26,480 We need to pick the lock. You got a credit card? 285 00:14:29,200 --> 00:14:31,240 I've got my provisional driving license. 286 00:14:31,880 --> 00:14:33,840 I've just never got around to it. 287 00:14:37,640 --> 00:14:39,600 I don't really know what I'm doing. 288 00:14:41,000 --> 00:14:41,880 Wait. 289 00:14:41,960 --> 00:14:44,720 I know how we can get in. Come with me. 290 00:14:48,120 --> 00:14:49,600 Oh, look at this. 291 00:14:49,680 --> 00:14:51,800 She's not separating her plastics. 292 00:14:52,640 --> 00:14:54,200 What kind of monster is she? 293 00:14:55,640 --> 00:14:58,560 Please, Trish, can't we just go? Someone's going to see us. 294 00:14:58,640 --> 00:15:00,320 -We'll get arrested. -Fine. Arrest me. 295 00:15:00,880 --> 00:15:03,040 But I'm not going until I've got what's rightfully mine. 296 00:15:04,480 --> 00:15:07,800 What is she thinking? They won't take bubble wrap. 297 00:15:09,040 --> 00:15:10,040 [swing music playing] 298 00:15:15,800 --> 00:15:17,280 Actually, I could get used to this. 299 00:15:17,880 --> 00:15:19,760 Her chair is so much better than ours. 300 00:15:19,840 --> 00:15:20,800 What about this one? 301 00:15:23,960 --> 00:15:25,680 She looks like she's about to cry. 302 00:15:25,760 --> 00:15:28,320 -You can't put that on a cake. -It was a moving target. 303 00:15:28,400 --> 00:15:30,200 [Danielle] We can do better than this. 304 00:15:30,280 --> 00:15:32,280 Maybe she's got a photo in here or something. 305 00:15:34,760 --> 00:15:36,600 -Any joy? -[Danielle] Nah. 306 00:15:38,520 --> 00:15:40,120 [buzzing] 307 00:15:44,200 --> 00:15:46,640 No, Danielle, I do not want to see that. 308 00:15:47,560 --> 00:15:49,440 It's all right, it's a frother. 309 00:15:49,520 --> 00:15:52,080 [chuckles] I know what it's for, Danielle. 310 00:15:54,760 --> 00:15:56,800 Right, give me a bunk up. 311 00:16:08,760 --> 00:16:10,480 -Ooh! -[thud] 312 00:16:10,560 --> 00:16:12,600 [Trish] I'm fine, I'm fine! 313 00:16:13,720 --> 00:16:15,200 [Karl] Right, I'm coming over. 314 00:16:18,080 --> 00:16:19,040 Come on. 315 00:16:21,680 --> 00:16:23,080 [Karl] Think I've got a splinter. 316 00:16:23,480 --> 00:16:26,240 Oh! My meerkats! 317 00:16:27,280 --> 00:16:29,160 What are you doing down there? 318 00:16:29,240 --> 00:16:32,760 Everyone loved the meerkats. They were always laughing at them. 319 00:16:33,320 --> 00:16:34,840 Go and put them back out the front. 320 00:16:35,400 --> 00:16:39,040 -I'm going in. -What? No. You can't! 321 00:16:39,440 --> 00:16:41,720 [Trish] Don't worry, Karl, there's no one in. 322 00:16:44,080 --> 00:16:46,080 They've changed the lino. 323 00:16:50,040 --> 00:16:51,200 Can I help you? 324 00:16:53,640 --> 00:16:59,200 Uh, no, I'm fine, thank you. I'm just admiring the drive. 325 00:16:59,760 --> 00:17:03,160 -Are you a friend of Chris and Paula's? -Yes. Yes, that's what I am, yes. 326 00:17:03,240 --> 00:17:05,520 Only we have to be careful, you see. We've had a few problems. 327 00:17:05,599 --> 00:17:07,359 Chris's ex... 328 00:17:08,200 --> 00:17:10,640 -bit of a screw loose. -Hmm, really? 329 00:17:11,119 --> 00:17:14,439 He's much better off without her. Paula's a lovely girl. 330 00:17:15,160 --> 00:17:16,920 -Mmm... -[dogs barking] 331 00:17:19,359 --> 00:17:22,519 I've got them, Karl, I've got my boys back! 332 00:17:22,599 --> 00:17:25,079 [Linda] Hello, Trish, how are you? 333 00:17:25,640 --> 00:17:28,600 Up yours, Linda. Come on, Karl. 334 00:17:28,680 --> 00:17:30,320 [dog barks] 335 00:17:32,640 --> 00:17:33,840 Where are your tights? 336 00:17:33,920 --> 00:17:36,280 I left them in the fridge as a dirty protest. 337 00:17:40,560 --> 00:17:42,200 -Do you have to? -[Angela] I have to eat 338 00:17:42,280 --> 00:17:45,280 every three and a half hours, I'm prone to mood swings. 339 00:17:47,760 --> 00:17:50,640 -Can't you use a fork like normal people? -Forks are in the kitchen. 340 00:17:50,720 --> 00:17:53,440 I'm not leaving you alone at my desk. 341 00:17:59,280 --> 00:18:01,440 -[Paul] Close. -George, stop moving. 342 00:18:01,520 --> 00:18:03,240 [George] Don't throw it at my head then. 343 00:18:03,320 --> 00:18:05,200 Why's no one doing any bloody work? 344 00:18:05,280 --> 00:18:06,640 Boss said we didn't have to. 345 00:18:06,720 --> 00:18:08,280 I've only got one rule as manager, Janette, 346 00:18:08,360 --> 00:18:11,520 and that is that everyone must be having fun at all times. 347 00:18:12,800 --> 00:18:16,200 [Trish] Everyone, I'd like you to meet my boys, Ferrero and Rocher. 348 00:18:16,280 --> 00:18:18,880 Go on, boys, go and say hello. Go on! 349 00:18:18,960 --> 00:18:19,960 [dogs barking] 350 00:18:20,040 --> 00:18:22,920 -Enjoy the pub? -You won't believe what just happened. 351 00:18:23,000 --> 00:18:25,480 What are you doing? You can't bring them things in here. 352 00:18:25,560 --> 00:18:27,920 -I've just vacuumed. -I can do what I like. 353 00:18:28,000 --> 00:18:30,640 I'm the manager. I am Trish. 354 00:18:31,840 --> 00:18:33,760 -Have you had a drink? -No, I haven't had a drink. 355 00:18:33,840 --> 00:18:36,360 I've had five drinks, and I've never felt so alive. 356 00:18:37,400 --> 00:18:39,200 Look at my beautiful labs. 357 00:18:39,760 --> 00:18:40,920 [dog growls] 358 00:18:42,720 --> 00:18:46,440 I'll go and put them in the learning room. Come on. Honestly. 359 00:18:46,960 --> 00:18:47,920 [dogs barking] 360 00:18:48,000 --> 00:18:49,560 Come on! Come on! 361 00:18:51,600 --> 00:18:53,160 I can't do this anymore. 362 00:18:53,800 --> 00:18:57,440 Excuse me, can you help? Have you got anything that can unstick me? 363 00:18:58,480 --> 00:19:01,040 I've got some carpet glue remover in my boot. 364 00:19:01,600 --> 00:19:03,400 But it's ten quid a bottle and highly toxic. 365 00:19:03,480 --> 00:19:04,680 But I haven't got a tenner. 366 00:19:10,400 --> 00:19:11,800 You can have it for free. 367 00:19:14,640 --> 00:19:18,480 On the up side, you can probably go back on incapacity, love. 368 00:19:20,440 --> 00:19:22,160 -Ooh! -[Trish] Janette? 369 00:19:22,240 --> 00:19:25,680 Have you got a scrubbing brush? I don't know what she's been feeding them, 370 00:19:25,760 --> 00:19:27,320 but it's coming out like a leaky radiator. 371 00:19:27,960 --> 00:19:30,400 Poor Rocher has practically written his name on all that carpet. 372 00:19:30,480 --> 00:19:31,800 Gordon Bennett. 373 00:19:31,880 --> 00:19:33,960 Honestly, Paul, I had to use a spoon. 374 00:19:34,040 --> 00:19:36,680 [Paul] Ah! It's 40 quid a square metre. 375 00:19:37,480 --> 00:19:38,760 [shouts] Get this thing off me! 376 00:19:38,840 --> 00:19:42,120 [Trish] Oh, don't mind him, Angela, he's just being friendly. 377 00:19:42,840 --> 00:19:44,520 He can probably smell your cat. 378 00:19:44,600 --> 00:19:46,160 I don't care, just get this dog off! 379 00:19:46,240 --> 00:19:48,920 -Give him a minute. -[Trish] Come on, Ferrero! 380 00:19:49,000 --> 00:19:51,120 Come on, put your lipstick away, please. 381 00:19:52,560 --> 00:19:54,960 -[Paula shouts] Get down, Ferrero! -[dog whimpers] 382 00:19:57,320 --> 00:19:58,120 Oh. 383 00:19:59,760 --> 00:20:00,720 Hello, Paula. 384 00:20:00,800 --> 00:20:01,920 Trish. 385 00:20:02,000 --> 00:20:02,840 How are you? 386 00:20:02,920 --> 00:20:05,720 [Paula] Very well. How are you? You look a little run down. 387 00:20:06,280 --> 00:20:08,880 I'm fine. I feel fine. I'm fine. 388 00:20:08,960 --> 00:20:10,960 You'd be more than welcome at my exercise classes. 389 00:20:11,040 --> 00:20:12,560 We cater for all ages. 390 00:20:13,440 --> 00:20:14,520 What do you want, Paula? 391 00:20:14,600 --> 00:20:17,000 I think you've taken something that belongs to me and Chris. 392 00:20:17,080 --> 00:20:21,000 No, I bought the dogs, they're mine. 393 00:20:24,120 --> 00:20:28,200 -Come on, boys, come to mummy. -Here, boys. Come here, boys. 394 00:20:28,280 --> 00:20:30,840 -Come on, boys, heel. -Come on. Here, boys, here. 395 00:20:30,920 --> 00:20:33,400 Here, boys, here, boys. Come on, come on, my labs. 396 00:20:33,480 --> 00:20:34,600 I tell you what. 397 00:20:35,760 --> 00:20:37,680 -Why don't you just have one each? -No. 398 00:20:37,760 --> 00:20:40,000 No one splits my labs. 399 00:20:40,080 --> 00:20:41,320 [dog whimpers] 400 00:20:41,400 --> 00:20:43,640 Come on, babies, come to mummy. Come on. 401 00:20:47,040 --> 00:20:48,400 Fine, keep them. 402 00:20:49,680 --> 00:20:52,040 I don't need your dogs. I've got your husband. 403 00:20:58,840 --> 00:21:03,040 [staff] ♪ Happy birthday to you ♪ 404 00:21:04,080 --> 00:21:08,560 ♪ Happy birthday to you ♪ 405 00:21:08,640 --> 00:21:14,400 ♪ Happy birthday, dear Trish ♪ 406 00:21:14,480 --> 00:21:18,680 ♪ Happy birthday to you ♪ 407 00:21:18,760 --> 00:21:19,880 [cheering] 408 00:21:21,560 --> 00:21:22,440 [Trish] Thanks, guys. 409 00:21:23,560 --> 00:21:26,280 [Angela] Will someone help and just get this dog off? 410 00:21:26,360 --> 00:21:30,680 ♪ Bring me sunshine in your smile ♪ 411 00:21:32,080 --> 00:21:38,080 ♪ Bring me laughter all the while ♪ 412 00:21:38,160 --> 00:21:43,640 ♪ In this world where we live There should be more happiness ♪ 413 00:21:43,720 --> 00:21:50,400 ♪ So much joy you can give To each brand new bright tomorrow ♪ 414 00:21:50,480 --> 00:21:54,040 ♪ Make me happy through the years ♪ 415 00:21:55,520 --> 00:21:58,120 ♪ Never bring me... ♪ 33187

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