All language subtitles for Ill.Be.Gone.In.The.Dark.S01E04.1080p.AMZN.WEB-DL.DDP5.1.H.264-NTb.ITA-EN

DONNA: Pronto?

- (STATICO) -CHIAMANTE SCONOSCIUTO: Ucciderti.

(STATICA CONTINUA)

♪ (SOMBER MUSIC PLAYS) ♪

DONNA 2: Al 79 ', lo stupratore dell'area est si è spostato a sud.

A Goleta, Santa Barbara, vediamo il prossimo attacco.

So che è la stessa persona.

DONNA 2: Il piacere dell'assassino è stato derivato

dall'aumentare la posta in gioco.

DONNA 3: Alla fine Michelle ha pensato

il nome Golden State Killer.

UOMO: Era il suo primo grande pezzo di scrittura.

DONNA 3: Quella storia è esplosa.

Ho detto che avrei rappresentato quel libro,

se voleva trasformarlo in uno.

UOMO 2: La speranza è che avendo maggiore attenzione del pubblico,

la persona giusta darà il consiglio giusto.

♪ (LA MUSICA CONCLUDE) ♪

♪ (RIPRODUZIONE DI MUSICA DRAMMATICA) ♪

(SEABIRDS SQUAWKING)

MICHELLE MCNAMARA: Cosa stavo pensando ieri sera?

Mi lascio ubriacare e cado in una trappola ...

ma con un uomo sposato con figli?

Non volevo che accadesse.

GIORNALISTA: È ben lungi dall'essere un incidente isolato.

Sono morte diverse migliaia di persone

dall'inizio dei disordini tra gli unionisti protestanti

-e cattolica romana ... -MICHELLE: Abito in questa casa

con cinque uomini e donne in difficoltà,

fornendo una sorta di consulenza modello modello di supporto.

REPORTER 2: ... l'ultimo di una serie di attentati dinamitardi contro le città dell'Irlanda del Nord.

MICHELLE: Dopo circa un mese a Belfast,

il comportamento del mio capo è cambiato dal calmare le paure che avevo

sugli scenari potenzialmente pericolosi ...

a qualcosa di più serio.

Ha parlato malinconicamente della gestione di band a Londra,

pantaloni di pelle di leopardo,

sua moglie perennemente offesa.

Lo lascio premere contro di me.

Mentre ero allarmato e angosciato dal suo comportamento,

era anche il mio supervisore,

e lui l'aveva creato quindi ero molto dipendente da lui.

(Letture)

I'm going home,

or at least away from here.

♪ ("AVALANCHE" BY AIMEE MANN PLAYING) ♪

♪ Well, I stepped Into an avalanche ♪

♪ It covered up my soul ♪

♪ When I am not this hunchback That you see ♪

♪ I sleep beneath The golden hill ♪

♪ You who wish to conquer pain ♪

♪ You must learn Learn to serve me well ♪

♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪

(INTERCOM DINGS)

PILOT: Again, good morning, ladies and gentlemen.

I'd like to welcome you back on board flight...

-(PHONE PINGS) -TEDDY SYKES: (ON SCREEN) You hate me, right?

-I'm sorry? -No, I'm kidding. We're buds.

But I'm the Vice President's Chief of Staff.

You know, you came to see him directly,

I didn't know you were coming, so...

-(PHONE PINGS) -JONAH RYAN: Oh, I'm sorry...

(PHONE PINGS CONTINUOUSLY)

♪ (DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING) ♪

KERA BOLONIK: As a writer, I know that the one thing

you don't say to a friend who's working on a book is,

"How's the book going?"

But I just wanted to just check in

and see how she was doing and was she coming to the city

any time soon,

so I said, "Hey. How's it going?

I really miss you."

-Then I see her note pop up. -(MESSAGE PINGS)

Writing your first book is really hard.

But she was great.

And she was really hard-working.

So I wasn't really that worried.

DANIEL GREENBERG: As the months and months went by,

her deadline coming closer,

she wasn't done or really close to being done.

Let me see if I have anything else in here from her.

I know that there were deadlines that she missed.

And I remember her being very, very worried about that,

and I'm like, "Call your agent right now,

and he will tell you, everyone misses their deadline."

The deadlines were things she put on herself.

You know, "I want to be reliable.

I want to be a professional."

KERA: She was a perfectionist.

And she was doing two things at once.

She was writing a book,

and she was trying to solve a case.

The fact that these two things were combined,

that's not a typical writing experience.

DANIEL: Oh, here's one.

MICHELLE: Hi, Daniel... (READS)

DANIEL: "...Santa Barbara Hotel.

I left my hotel exactly twice."

MICHELLE: The writing is going well.

I can turn in another big batch of pages,

but I personally feel it's too soon to deliver it

as a final manuscript.

DANIEL: "And as I've told you on a personal level,

I can't continue at this pace with this material.

My gut says that I should come to New York City soon..."

MICHELLE: ...soon, to meet with you and Jennifer.

I can share with you guys a few developments

that are exciting.

-(BELLS JINGLING) -(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

JENNIFER BARTH: I do remember that last time

when she was in New York in December of 2015.

MICHELLE: Oh, hi.

Thank you so much for talking to me.

This has been, uh...

JENNIFER: And I think Michelle was a little nervous.

So she came fully prepared.

She had a presentation.

She was, um, had all the reasons lined up.

MICHELLE: Through various twists and turns,

pleas and persuasion,

I'm being allowed to go down

to the Orange County Sheriff's Department

and enter their EAR/ONS room,

a room which apparently hasn't been entered in years.

It's an obvious opportunity to help advance the case.

JENNIFER: She said this huge treasure trove of files

was going to be handed to her.

And there was no way she wasn't gonna go through it.

I think we sort of went back and forth

and debated the pros and cons,

but it pretty quickly was clear that

we all kinda thought, like, yeah,

give-- you know, take the time.

MICHELLE: Okay, well, I will not take up

any more of your time. You-- This has been awesome.

JENNIFER: It was partially the case,

but it was also partially Michelle

and how she just enlisted people

to her cause and to her passion for it.

In retrospect, I-- I wonder if she knew

that she was a little consumed, and that maybe...

maybe part of her wanted an artificial deadline

to-- to be set.

But I was so curious about what she was gonna find out next.

You had this sense

that you were going down this dark corridor,

and there were more and more doors opening faster,

and that she was gonna get through the last one,

like it was a matter of time.

♪ (DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING) ♪

(MESSAGE PINGS)

(MESSAGE PINGS)

(MESSAGE PINGS)

(MESSAGE PINGS)

CROWD: Six, five, four,

three, two, one!

Happy New Year!

-(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) -(FIREWORKS BOOM)

RADIO HOST: And good morning to you.

The new year is upon us.

Happy New Year to everyone. Thanks for...

(BIRDS CHIRPING)

(TYPING ON KEYBOARD)

MICHELLE: (READS)

-ALICE RIGNEY OSWALT: Now? -MICHELLE: Yeah.

"When I was little,

even young boys were expected to work.

-All least..." -MICHELLE: Also.

ALICE: "...Also loved animals."

MICHELLE: Feeling Xanaxy without a Xanax.

(KETTLE WHISTLES)

(TELEVISION CHATTER)

-♪ (DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ -(MESSAGE PINGS)

(MESSAGE PINGS)

♪ (UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING) ♪

When Michelle suggested that we motorcade into Santa Ana

in two separate SUVs

with the expectation that we would be leaving

with the motherlode, as we dubbed it,

from the Orange County Sheriff's Department,

um, you know, I was skeptical.

Law enforcement agencies don't just let private citizens

take what they want.

MICHELLE: I don't necessarily think we'll be allowed

to pull off my heist-like plan.

But I'd like to be prepared for the possibility.

Honestly, I feel like this is the best chance

of solving the case.

♪ (MUSIC CONTINUES) ♪

(MESSAGES PING)

(CAR LOCK BEEPS)

♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪

PAUL HAYNES: We met the homicide investigator

who had inherited the case from Larry Pool.

And Michelle chatted with him for about 40 minutes.

And I could feel the energy in the room shift

from kinda smug skepticism to awe.

Then he led us to the box room.

♪ (DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING) ♪

MICHELLE: The unsolved section of a property room

is tainted with disappointment.

Fringed purse.

Embroidered tunic.

Items from lives defined by violent death.

It's the to-do list that's never done.

Now, it seemed that the weather in the property room,

always an oppressive gray, had lifted,

and light beamed down

on the monotony of cardboard boxes.

Everyone basked in the possibilities.

It was a heady feeling,

the idea that one could reverse

the flow of power.

♪ (UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING) ♪

(PHONE PINGS)

HAYNES: As we're loading the Bankers boxes

into the backs of the SUVs,

the undersheriff appears.

And he had no idea what was unfolding.

And Michelle was like, you know, "Let-- Let's pick up the pace

and get out of here before people change their minds."

MICHELLE: Dammit.

HAYNES: It really felt like a heist.

(TIRES SCREECHING)

♪ (UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING) ♪

(MESSAGE PINGS)

(MESSAGES PING)

(MESSAGE PINGS)

HAYNES: The problem with a case like this is that

there's very little that has been known for sure

about this offender.

We knew that he's a white male

born sometime between 1940 and 1960.

MICHELLE: The height seems pretty consistent.

HAYNES: We knew that he was roughly five-nine, five-ten...

MICHELLE: He's anywhere from five-eight to maybe five-ten.

The shoe size is nine and a half.

HAYNES: ...and was in the Sacramento area

in the mid to late '70s.

Everything else has just been an unknown variable

and a possible

and the most significant of those was Visalia.

Hello. I'm Scott Devenney

and for the next few minutes, I invite you to visit

one of America's hardest working cities,

as you discover Visalia.

MICHELLE: In the town of Visalia,

there was this ransacker

who I mean just down to the strangest details

totally mirrors the-- the East Area Rapist.

MELANIE BARBEAU: If you look at the Visalia cases,

they're very much things that he did

-in all his rape cases. -(EMPTY DIAL TONE)

He took trinkets

that would be more of something personal

and close to a victim.

There were many times

where valuables were left behind.

MICHELLE: And the burglaries are all--

they have one earring taken sometime--

just very specific things that are very quirky.

Both offenders used the same specific phrase

in phone calls they made to victims,

which was, um, "I'm going to come over and fuck you."

MICHELLE: The Visalia Ransacker was really into

going through lingerie.

He would take out and leave it just sort of arrayed around.

So, you know, it could be a coincidence,

it's a mighty coincidence though if it's not him, I think.

(PAPER TEARING)

MELANIE: I never was

a hundred percent he wasn't Visalia

or 100 percent he was.

But these numerous burglaries

and peepings

and masturbation

and just that type of behavior,

I do think could have led to his real fantasy,

which was rape.

And I also think

that the only reason he left Visalia

is because, um, Bill McGowen saw him.

MICHELLE: (READS)

...where tennis shoe impressions had been observed

under the bedroom window.

(POLICE RADIO CHATTER)

McGowen waited.

(CHATTER CONTINUES)

A figure appeared in the garage doorway

and looked around.

A chase ensued.

But the suspect escaped.

(SIRENS WAILING)

A month later, Detective McGowen was hypnotized.

HYPNOTIST: Okay, um...

MICHELLE: The hypnotist quietly encouraged McGowen to relax.

HYPNOTIST:

MICHELLE: Legs were uncrossed,

fists unclenched,

breathing deepened.

HYPNOTIST:

(POLICE RADIO CHATTER)

(GUNSHOT)

MICHELLE: When McGowen fired a warning shot,

the suspect gestured in surrender.

"Oh my God, don't hurt me," he squeaked

in an oddly mannered, high pitched voice.

"See, my hands are up!"

Remembering the moment during hypnosis

pulled McGowen into a deeper trance.

He fixated on the face illuminated

in the beam of his flashlight.

"Baby, round,

soft-looking baby.

Doesn't even shave.

Very light skin."

McGowen started over the fence to arrest him,

but the Ransacker had raised

only his right hand in surrender.

With his left hand,

he withdrew a blue steel revolver

-from his coat pocket. -(GUNSHOT)

I fell down, uh, the-- the impact knocked me back

and, uh...

the, uh, projectile went into the end of my flashlight,

which is a Kel-Lite, the big metal one,

and, uh, it went through several batteries

and lodged in the back portion of the flashlight.

MICHELLE: The Ransacker struck as many as 130 times

over a period of less than two years.

But once the composite sketch based on Bill McGowen's run-in

with the Ransacker was released to local press,

he never struck Visalia again.

The EAR series began in Sacramento

just six months later.

♪ (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪

REPORTER: The article suggests a link

between the East Area Rapist and Visalia.

But at the Sacramento Sheriff's Department,

the information is branded as false

and the Visalia Police Department

is being labeled as irresponsible

for suggesting that connection.

MICHELLE: I just don't put a lot of stock in that composite.

He was wearing a mask and the guy was taking it off

when he kind of shot at him.

HOLES: Well, there's other burglary victims

-that saw the Ransacker. -MICHELLE: Okay.

HOLES: And so they took that composite

to those other victims and they said,

"Yeah, that's the guy I saw."

So, it kind of gives further credence

-this was the Ransacker. -MICHELLE: I see. I see.

HOLES: Now, the very first EAR

sees the EAR standing in her doorway

and he's nude from the waist down

and she goes, "He's slim built."

Broad-shouldered, well-proportioned,

but slim.

So, six months after Visalia Ransacker,

-and now he's a skinny guy? -MICHELLE: Mm-hmm. (LAUGHS)

♪ (DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING) ♪

MICHELLE: There can only be so many white males

born between these years

who have connections to these towns,

so really it is kind of just get--

winnowing it down, you know.

Have your feelings changed over the years about sort of

what brought him to all these different places, work wise?

What about real estate?

Will you be surprised if he doesn't have a record?

MAN: I will.

MICHELLE: Do you feel like he was thinking like a cop?

I'm not sure if I'm reading too much into that.

I've heard that the whole dishes thing was something

that may have happened in Vietnam,

so I, you know, I'm not sure he wasn't a vet

-or something like that. -MAN: Right. Wow.

MICHELLE: Yeah.

One of the, um, things

that the rape victims tell me that he did a couple times

which just is so weird to me,

is after the rape he would go into the corner

-and start sobbing and, um... -LARRY CROMPTON: Yes.

He would say, "Bonnie is gonna hate me,"

-or that type of thing. -MICHELLE: Yeah.

That must have just been some kind of thing with him.

CROMPTON: Yeah.

MICHELLE: And I don't even know what that could be, but yeah.

I read about a case every day that's solved by DNA

and it's just some guy who just is living quietly

for the last 25 years of his life,

he met some woman that liked him and had ki--

you know, I would-- I just won't be surprised

if it turns out, um, that he's compartmentalized

this part of his life or something.

MARY RITA SKRINE: Oh, hey, Mish. It's Mary Rita.

We're flying into LA so, um,

wanted to see if you guys were around.

So just call me whenever.

Thanks. Bye.

In March, I took my two kids

to LA for spring break.

And she was so excited that we were there.

First, she got the 23andMe.

She's talking about our DNA. (LAUGHS)

And she was so excited. And she's going through her--

all the results and telling my kids about everything.

MICHELLE: You guys know what 23andMe is?

-MAN: Mm-hmm. -MICHELLE: Okay.

I did it like four years ago.

I get an email about every week that says,

"Hey, we found your second cousin.

We found..." whatever.

The chances that someone in his greater family are--

is in 23andMe is pretty high.

So, she started to talk about the case,

and she said, "You guys want to see the boxes?"

♪ (DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING) ♪

She just poured out all these...

details about the case

and how excited she was,

and all you did was hope that she could solve it.

I remember her slowing down the writing,

because she couldn't write

until she went through all of this stuff.

And I'm not sure if I heard from her again

after that.

Every available hour from late January of 2016

until April 21, 2016, was spent

reviewing or interacting with our new acquisition.

The motherlode.

MICHELLE: It's beyond a treasure trove of info.

I have to think there's at least an 80 percent chance

his name is buried in here somewhere.

HAYNES: We were following ideas

and suspects and theories and leads

or, uh, she would spot something

that wasn't thoroughly investigated

or not followed up on.

There was material in there

that us other investigators had never seen.

And so, as she came across material

that she thought was relevant, she did share that.

So now, I'm looking at who this guy is.

♪ (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪

And I told Michelle, "Yeah, you know, right now,

I can't eliminate him, at all."

So, Michelle was saying, "We gotta get his DNA."

I was like, "Absolutely."

MELANIE: I can't even tell you,

when you see something that you're looking for,

how far down the rabbit hole you go.

I mean, I can't believe some of the things I've done,

to tell you the truth. (CHUCKLES)

MICHELLE: Have you ever interacted with anyone

that you thought might be a suspect, like...?

MELANIE: Yes, I actually got DNA on the suspect.

MICHELLE: You-- You yourself did?

MELANIE: Yes, and I know the suspect.

MICHELLE: Oh my gosh.

'Cause he was someone who, like,

you went to high school with or something?

-MELANIE: I dated him. -MICHELLE: Wow.

MELANIE: I happened to know a guy

who was on the suspect list

and I talked him into coming into Sacramento.

And so we have lunch.

I'm thinking I'm gonna bag the silverware,

but I'm like, I can't get the silverware

without him seeing me.

So, I say, "Well, why don't you let me drive you home?"

And so, I put him in the car, and he had a bottle of water.

And I go, "Can I have the last sip of that water?"

And I took it and kept it

and turned it in to be DNA tested.

MICHELLE: Wow. Did he live in any of the areas?

MELANIE:

MICHELLE: Oh, my gosh!

MELANIE: Um...

Yeah, I spend three to four hours a day

on this case.

-I have five kids. -MICHELLE: Right.

MELANIE: My sixth grandchild is due any second,

and, um, I mean, I just have a really full life,

but I'm consumed with this case.

MICHELLE: I've had an uneasy realization

about how our frenetic searching

mirrors the compulsive behavior of the one we seek.

The trampled flower beds.

Scratch marks on window screens.

-Crank calls. -(STATIC CRACKLES)

We glimpse the rough outline of what we seek,

and we get snagged on it,

sometimes remaining stuck

when we could get free and move on.

-My song-- -MICHELLE: Wait, wait, wait.

One, two, three.

This is my song that I want to show you.

That I learned from, uh...

♪ (PIANO MUSIC PLAYING) ♪

(MESSAGE PINGS)

MICHELLE: Wow.

♪ (DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING) ♪

(MESSAGE PINGS)

(MESSAGE PINGS)

WOMAN: Hey, Michelle. How are you?

I wanted to just go over the placement of the tree

in the rear portion of the yard.

MAN: Hey, Michelle. I wanted to talk to you

about the pool basically.

It's discharging water over to the property behind you.

PATTON OSWALT: Hey, it's Patton.

Alice got off to school okay.

Thank you for, uh, helping.

MELANIE: Good morning, Michelle. It's Mel.

I believe it was number 21.

LARRY POOL: Hi, Michelle. Investigator Larry Pool.

MAN 2: There's nothing there to hide.

I understand you want to speak with me about Janelle Cruz.

Uh, more than happy to speak with you.

I'll, uh, I'll try again later.

Probably about ten o'clock your time. Thank you. Goodbye.

♪ (DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING) ♪

(RECORDER BEEPS)

MICHELLE: The killer's last known victim

was an 18-year-old young woman in Irvine

named Janelle Cruz.

That was in 1986.

MICHELLE: Yeah. It's hard to figure out.

MELANIE: The Janelle Cruz case was very interesting to us.

You know, being 18 years old

and just so innocent and so young.

WOMAN: Janelle!

MICHELLE: She-- You know, I was a teenager

-around the same time. -WOMAN: Say something!

And I-- I'd just-- even looking at her hairstyles and stuff,

it's very familiar to me.

MAN: Walk to me, Janelle.

MICHELLE: The brief life of Janelle Cruz

was no less tragic than her death.

Her biological father was long out of the picture.

When she was 15, she was drugged and raped.

The crime went unreported.

On May 3rd, 1986, her mother and stepfather

left for a vacation to Cancun.

The following evening, a teenage coworker

hung out with Janelle after she told him

she was lonely with her parents out of town.

A noise outside startled them.

Janelle looked out her window and closed the shutters.

"I think it's just the cats."

The workmate left a short time later.

HOLES: In the Janelle Cruz case,

relative to the previous cases, there's a lot of similarities.

And it appears that he, of course,

is going through the backyard.

He picked up the weapon, likely a monkey wrench

that was present in the backyard.

He's able to get inside...

and then he binds her up and she's raped

and then she's bludgeoned.

♪ (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪

It's important to point out

that when he attacks Janelle Cruz,

the Golden State Killer's previous attack

was five years earlier

in July of 1981.

♪ (DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING) ♪

CAROL DALY: Knowing what I know about this man,

if I had a gun, I definitely would shoot him.

And I would not shoot to injure,

I would shoot to take care of him.

CROMPTON: I believe that he wants to kill,

and he will kill.

MICHELLE: The interesting thing about Janelle's case

is the gap between '81 and '86.

He obviously was stopping for whatever reason.

(ENGINE REVVING)

It wasn't just that he saw Janelle

and was like, "I'm gonna kill her."

I think there was a combination of, like,

she was gonna be his next victim,

and I think it must've been some sort of precipitating stressor,

and who knows what that was.

Maybe he just got kicked out of his house or something,

you know, lost his job.

He was just obviously very, very angry.

And, yeah, it's just-- it's-- it's-- it's just a very,

very sad story, and, um...

and you can just only hope that somehow, in her life--

like in that time period around when she died,

maybe there is a clue of, you know,

maybe she-- something she said or...

So, you know, looking into her life in that way

is interesting to me, yeah.

(BIRDS CHIRPING)

Have you seen the, um, the interview

that-- with Janelle's mom?

I mean, she kind of talks, stream of consciousness

in a way that I thought,

"Someone who is an investigator should listen to this."

-Janelle... -MICHELLE:

...was kind of a shy girl.

She was very pretty, very popular.

MICHELLE:

But at the same...

MICHELLE:

Anyway, uh, this one night I let her stay overnight

at her girlfriend's house.

She came home the next day, cr-- uh, crying and--

and she wouldn't tell me why right away,

but the man, the father of the young girl,

uh, raped her.

(CONTINUES INDISTINCTLY)

MELANIE:

MICHELLE: Right. Right. Yeah.

MELANIE:

MICHELLE:

-They-- They-- -MELANIE: No, but I mean...

MICHELLE: Yeah. Oh, they--

-MELANIE: Yeah, I mean-- -MICHELLE: No, I--

I had a similar--

MELANIE: Mm-hmm.

MICHELLE:

♪ (DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING) ♪

MICHELLE: I catch myself in urban mirrors,

store windows, the smudged glass on the train.

Each time, I look dazed,

slightly wide-eyed,

as if I'm seeing something unbelievable for the first time.

The neediness of his stubby fingers

digging inside me.

The scene in Linen Hall Library,

burning eyes staring at me.

(WAVES CRASHING)

(READS)

♪ (DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING) ♪

(READS)

The conversation with Mom and Dad really tore me apart.

I know they care immensely and want what's best for me.

I just think sometimes,

they don't know what's going on inside me.

I'm so angry, and then I'm not.

I'm so sad and full of self-doubt,

and then I'm not.

Where... Where can this all lead?

GAY HARDWICK: A year and a few months past,

uh, the attack, we had sold the house.

And we decided to get married in the backyard of--

of the new house when the landscaping was put in.

So, we just had a small wedding,

with just a few close family and friends. (CHUCKLES)

♪ (DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING) ♪

Bob is huge on moving forward and moving on.

And that was good for me to have somebody to grab my hand

and say we were gonna move forward,

and we were gonna move past this

and we were not gonna let it destroy our life.

On the other hand, I actually had been suffering

a lot of post-traumatic stress symptoms.

I just was afraid and exhausted all the time,

but I wasn't formally diagnosed for about six years.

And the psychiatrist said,

you know, my central nervous system has--

has been rewired because of the trauma

that I experienced during those hours.

♪ (DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING) ♪

(CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS)

You don't live your life the same way again, ever.

Um...

you know, I'm sure you've had your times of depression,

but you handle it much better than me.

I wouldn't say that. I just handle it differently.

I remember in a mediation,

a-- a attorney called my client a liar,

and it was in a court mediation and I just flipped out.

I just stood up and pinned the guy against the wall.

(CHUCKLES)

I guess, then I was in-- I felt maybe I was in control.

But when you think about what she went through,

she went through a lot more than I went through

and then it's-- uh, but the bad part

is I could do nothing about it, you know.

That's the-- That's the only thing.

That's...

But I still think about it, you know.

You know, you want to protect your wife,

you want to protect your kids, but sometimes you can't.

Well, for, you know-- you may have those feelings,

but in the past 40 years, you've more than made up...

(LAUGHS) ...for-- for taking, you know, extra care of me

at times when I'm sure other men probably would've walked away.

So...

♪ (DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING) ♪

You learn to live with these things

just like you learn to live with the loss of a loved one,

and you pass through stages and hopefully you recover.

And you become a fully functioning human being

with a happy life.

BOB HARDWICK: I mean, I wanted to be super wealthy one day

and she wanted to be the top of a construction company

and we just decided that we could start a family

and, you know, take a different approach.

GAY: So we dialed back and I stayed home ten years.

So, we started out with one, and it grew to three.

And finally, to four. Family of six.

And, uh, all the kids

have brought great gifts to our lives.

MARY RITA: Happy birthday, sweet sister.

I hope you're having a good day.

MARGO CHADWICK: Hey, Mish. It's Margo.

Calling to wish you a very happy birthday.

I love ya. Hope everything's going well.

PATRICK SKRINE: Hey, Aunt Michelle. It's Patrick.

I just wanted to say happy birthday to you.

ADAM DRUCKER: Happy birthday, beautiful.

And I hope you're having a great night

doing something fun with your family.

I love you very, very, very much.

Bye, baby.

-♪ (DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ -(MESSAGE PINGS)

(MESSAGE PINGS)

(MESSAGE PINGS)

(MESSAGE PINGS)

(GIGGLING)

Look, see, she knows what she's talking about.

She-- wait. She don't know.

No, no, no. He looks nervous and scared.

Yeah. And he's like...

PATTON: She was still very much a mom and a wife

and a friend.

(CHEERING)

PATTON: But the further she got into this,

it was clear that she had a real shot at solving this.

ALICE: Hi, Mom. Call you later.

MICHELLE: Little Dom's and old police files.

Miss you guys so much.

Remember to tell Alice Mommy loves her

and can't wait to be finished with her book,

so that I can be with her more than she'll ever want me to be.

PATTON: That can really pull you

into some depths that you can't get yourself back out of.

MICHELLE: Holy mother of God.

I came across a shitload of photos in my boxes.

A whole shoebox full.

Fucking monster.

I'd never seen the Smith scene in Ventura.

Bludgeoned with a log

from firewood pile outside house.

Bark everywhere.

But I will say, crime scene wise,

there is something very striking about how eerily similar

the individual crime scenes are.

There's something so, um...

uh, I can't-- I wish I could articulate it,

the way he-- he walks around people's houses

and the way he destroys them.

And sort of hangs out and eats.

That's why I just don't think this is like pure sexual sadism.

I think there was something else,

you know, going on there psychologically.

It's so, um, king-- "I am king" and how, you know, this is--

He just-- it's so-- it's so unusual to have someone

who just actually wants to ruin your home,

where it's like so-- it's like he got

to the emotional center of people's lives

and just wanted to destroy that.

PATTON: (YAWNS) Hey, it's, uh, it's Patton.

Try to call me in, like, uh, ten minutes

'cause I'm kinda falling asleep here.

I'd love to talk to you.

MICHELLE: (READS)

PATTON: It was a lot of sleeplessness and insomnia.

There must have been days where she was, like,

"I'll take Adderall in the morning.

I'll take, you know, Xanax and Vicodin to get to sleep

because I'm-- this is for a better--

this is for a bigger purpose than me."

(TAPE RECORDER REWINDS)

DREW WITTHUHN: But if you wanna just run through, I...

-I don't mind. -MICHELLE: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, totally. Yeah.

DREW: So, uh, the night before

CSI released the house...

MICHELLE: Mm-hmm.

DREW: ...I really wasn't allowed to get anywhere near it.

MICHELLE: Right.

DREW:

Um, they called and said, "Okay,

you know, we're releasing the home,

so now you guys can go in and-- and basically clean up.

Because at the time, they didn't have companies

that specialized in crime scenes

and-- and biohazard things and things like that.

And I felt a responsibility to my brother

to make this crime scene no longer a crime scene.

Let's turn it back into a home.

-DREW: And, uh... -MICHELLE:

DREW:

MICHELLE: Oh, wow.

(DOOR CREAKING)

DREW: We went into the bedroom and took a look around,

and it wasn't a pretty sight.

You know, it's not the kinda thing

you want to remember if you don't have to.

He had a very intricate brass bed,

which took a long time to clean because there was,

you know, blood spatter everywhere.

And on the carpet and the wall behind it.

MICHELLE: Mm-hmm.

DREW: And we cleaned it up as well as we could.

MICHELLE: And this is before David has seen it.

So, yeah, you're protecting him from it, yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

DREW: When we finally left the house

and everything was done,

the autopilot was almost turned off, if that makes sense.

And the rush of emotion, it just overwhelmed me.

My thoughts were of my brother and of my sister-in-law.

And I have no idea why, to this day I don't,

but at that very moment, I mourned for my dad.

MICHELLE: Wow. Oh, my gosh.

DREW:

-And he... -MICHELLE:

DREW: You know, it's one of those things, and I--

It's hard to say. We really don't know.

-MICHELLE: Yeah, yeah. -DREW: But, um,

it kinda all hit us like a ton of bricks, obviously.

-MICHELLE: Yeah. -DREW: He says, come here...

-MICHELLE: Right. -DREW:

-MICHELLE: Oh. Oh, Drew. Gosh. -DREW: And so...

DREW:

MICHELLE: Oh, my God.

-DREW: I-- I never-- -MICHELLE:

DREW:

MICHELLE: Oh, God.

DREW:

-MICHELLE: Yeah. -DREW: So... It's not easy.

It's not easy for anybody.

♪ (DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING) ♪

EAST AREA RAPIST: Gonna kill you.

Gonna kill you.

Gonna kill you.

(MESSAGE PINGS)

♪ (DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING) ♪

(MESSAGE PINGS)

(MESSAGE PINGS)

(MESSAGE PINGS)

MICHELLE: If you commit a murder and then vanish,

what you leave behind isn't just pain,

but absence.

A supreme blankness that triumphs

over everything else.

The unidentified murderer is always twisting a doorknob

behind a door that never opens.

But his power evaporates the moment you know him.

(EXHALES)

Okay.

Letter to an Old Man.

You were your approach.

The thump against the fence.

A temperature dip from a jimmied-open patio door.

A blade at the base of the neck.

(CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS)

Your fantasies ran deep,

but they never tripped you up.

(READS)

Not me.

I think you bailed when the world began to change.

It's true, age must have slowed you.

But your heyday prowess has no value anymore.

Virtual windows are opening all around you.

You, the master watcher, are an aging,

lumbering target in their crosshairs.

A ski mask won't help you now.

One day soon, you'll hear a car pull up to your curb,

an engine cut out.

You'll hear footsteps coming up your front walk.

The doorbell rings.

(DOORBELL RINGS)

-(DOG BARKING) -No side gates are left open.

You're long past leaping over a fence.

Take one of your hyper, gulping breaths,

clench your teeth, inch timidly toward the insistent bell.

(READS)

Open the door, show us your face.

Walk into the light.

(BIRDS CHIRPING)

(MESSAGE PINGS)

(MESSAGE PINGS)

(MESSAGE PINGS)

(FOOTSTEPS)

(DOOR CREAKS OPEN)

(BLANKETS RUSTLING)

(PHONE DIALING 911)

(PHONE RINGING)

PATTON: I-- I need an ambulance here right now.

An EMT team right now.

DISPATCHER: Okay, sir, listen to me.

We're gonna send you help. Okay?

How old is your wife?

PATTON: I'm calling from this address right now.

Please, please send the ambulance right now.

DISPATCHER: Sir, I'm sending you help there now. Okay?

Help is on the way. Stay on...

(SIRENS WAILING)

(BIRDS CHIRPING)

♪ (DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING) ♪