Original subtitles

Hello, there. This is my son. Good to see you.

Hello, Gil. How you doin'?

Dorothy, this here's Gil Warren.

Gil Warren, hi.

lt's so good to see you.

Don't worry, Gil. She's just a little shy.

l got you.

Auntie, I brought you some tea.

Look! Here they come! Come on, they're coming ! Look!

(CHATTERlNG)

(CRYlNG)

(LAUGH lNG)

Move, now, we're getting ready to set the table, you all.

Take these checkers someplace else.

Come on, sweetie.

Here, you take these checkers.

Come on, Henry, be careful, now.

Come on.

Take your uncle's checkers.

Oh, man, you always drop the checkers when l'm. . .

That's the way you win games!

Why do you have to drop. . .

Toto! Toto. . .

There you go. You're such a. . .

(lN DlSTlNCT CHATTERlNG)

(SlNGlNG) Put your arms around me, child

Like when you bumped your shin

Then you'll know l love you now

As I loved you then

Though you may be trying sometimes

and I'll need you and you're not there

You know I may get mad

and turn away

But you know that I still care

Don't lose the feeling that we have

Though you're growing older now

And l'm watching you grow

(CH EERlNG)

l know I make you sad sometimes

And I see your feelings show

But one day I'll look around

And you will be grown

You'll be out in the world, such a pretty girl

But you'll be on your own

And l'd like to know it's there

The feeling that we have

Knowing that you can come to me

Whenever you are sad

Child, l'd like to know it's there

The feeling that we have

Don't lose the feeling that we have

(SlNGlNG) Lose it, Iose it

l don't even know the first thing

About what they're feeling

What am I afraid of?

Don't know what l'm made of

Can I go on not knowing?

Feeling. . .

Something tells me that it's more than I can deal with

Though I never knew the song

Some words still catch on

Like caring

And sharing

Being together

No matter

Can I go on not knowing?

Don't know what l'm made of

Why am I afraid of

feeling?

Feeling. . .

lf I dared to take a chance

Would someone lead me?

MAN : (ON TV) Emergency snow alert is now in effect.

No automobiles are to be driven without snow tires or chains.

Winds up to 45 miles per hour. . . (TU RNS OFF TV)

That was a great dinner, Emma.

(CH UCKLES)

That baby. . .

You're a grandpa.

Our daughter's fine.

But Dorothy. . .

Give it time, honey. Give it time.

(CH UCKLlNG)

Those dishes ain't gonna wash themselves.

Mrs. Warren's son looks real fine, don't he?

Aunt Em, please, no more matchmaking.

Did you make the decision about that new school yet?

lt's no decision to make.

But, honey, it's a chance for you to teach in a high school.

Get away from that kindergarten once and for all.

lt's more money.

But besides the money, it's a chance for you to be with older students.

Almost adults.

l like it with the kids, Aunt Em.

Oh, I know you do, honey.

And you're a fine teacher,

but that's why l think you'd enjoy teaching high school.

Have a chance to be with the students for four years.

lt's such an important time in their development.

l'm really happy with the kids, Aunt Em.

But you've been there for three years already.

lt's time you got out of that sandbox

and into some new people, new neighborhood.

Girl, do you know you're 24 years old, and you've never

been south of 125th Street? Never been south of 125th Street.

(LAUGHS) Well, you haven't.

Oh, here we go again.

Why do you get me so worked up

that l'm beginning to sound like a Jewish mother?

l can't see how going south of 125th Street

ever made anybody's life better.

And you're never gonna know unless you try, are you?

Come on, Aunt Em, let me do that. Why don't you go and relax?

l can do. . . Let me do that.

Listen, I know getting out in that world ain't easy.

Leaving Uncle Henry and me. . .

But we'll always be here for you, Dorothy,

and whatever your fears are,

well, they'll be defeated just by facing up to them.

Now, you take that new job and find a place for you and Toto.

lt's time for you to make a home of your own.

Toto! Oh, Toto!

Toto! Toto!

Toto!

(WlN D HOWLlNG)

Toto! Toto!

Toto!

(lN DlSTlNCT SCREAMlNG)

(SlNGlNG MELODlOUS TU N E)

(DOROTHY SCREAMlNG)

(TOTO WH lMPERlNG)

Toto, where are you? Toto! Toto! Toto!

(WH lMPERlNG)

Toto. Toto.

Toto, Toto, Toto. . .

(ALL CHATTERlNG)

Where am l?

(ALL CHATTERlNG)

(CRYlNG)

(CHANTlNG)

ALL: Two, two, two. . .

Two, four, six, eight! Who do we appreciate?

No! No! Relax, mama.

Lay back, honey.

We just wanna lay a little thanks on you. What?

You know, heavy on the gratitude department.

Gratitude? For what? For curling the curse.

For leveling the leech.

For killing our oppressor.

(EXCLAlMS) I never killed nothing in my life. Never killed a point?

Never killed a pint? A good story?

The umpire? No!

Never killed no time?

(CRYlNG) No, I told you l never killed nothing in my life!

Well, then, I think you just graduated

from the bush leagues into the majors, girl.

Toto?

Can you dig this?

(DOROTHY GASPlNG)

Who is it?

Ain't no more "is." Thanks to you, it's a "was."

(ALL CH EERlNG)

She was Evamean.

The Wicked Witch from the East.

BOY: And they didn't call her Evamean for nothing.

She was the Parks Department Commissioner.

Caught us painting on her playground wall.

Turned us into graffiti.

And there we stayed.

Flat, splat and stuck like that.

Doomed as cartoons forever.

Till you burned alphabet through the sky and ended the curse.

And the curseress.

Giving a new lease on life to us, the Munchkins.

Most recently referred to as the cursees.

Toto.

Let's hear it for super witch and her wonder dog !

ALL: Two, four, six, eight! Who do we appreciate?

Miss One!

(ALL CH EERlNG)

(MlSS ON E LAUGH lNG)

Come to mama, you hot little digits!

Let me lay my twenty-twenties on you.

Oh, how I love you. Let me count the ways.

lnnumerable blessings, countless felicitations.

Thank you beyond number and additional good stuff!

l didn't mean to. . . l didn't mean to kill her.

MlSS ON E: Oh, don't be at all sixes and sevens, honey.

You did the world a multitudinous service by eighty-sixing old Evamean.

Bottom line, honey, this chick put the "ugh" in "ugly."

(ALL LAUGH lNG)

But she sure had pretty shoes, didn't she?

(EXCLAlMS)

(ALL MUTTERlNG)

l don't want these shoes. l wanna go home.

Oh, I wouldn't discount those shoes, honey,

and don't ever take them off until you do get home.

Remember, Miss One told you. Oh, pardon me.

Miss One's the name, and if you haven't guessed by now,

numbers is my game.

And now that you've freed us, we can all go back to running our business.

We can all go back to running our business.

We can all go back to running our business!

But where am l? Where am l?

You're in Munchkinland !

The indivisible land of Oz!

Oz?

But where's my home? Where's Aunt Em? Where's New York?

New York?

433 Prospect Place.

(EXCLAlMS) Four, three, three.

You wanna play more than one number today, honey?

l got a freedom special, three numbers for the price of one.

No, I don't wanna play any numbers. l just wanna get home!

Oh, well, now that old Evamean's number's up,

that leaves only three witches in Oz.

One, myself, but my powers don't amount to much.

And number two, Glinda, the Good Witch of the South.

Oh, she's a real star, but you can hardly catch her in.

And number three,

the multi-horrored Evillene, the Wicked Witch of the West,

(ALL EXCLAlMlNG)

Evamean's even-uglier sister.

But I don't think it'd be a good time to ask her for a favor,

so I figured the odds are only the Wiz could cipher how to get you back to. . .

Where'd you say that place was?

The Wiz?

What's a Wiz?

What's a. . . What's a Wiz? (SN lCKERlNG)

Oh, darling, he's the ultimate.

(ALL CH EERlNG)

The x-quotient, the new math,

the common denominator, the main man, the head honcho.

Bottom line, honey, numero uno.

(ALL CH EERlNG)

Where is he? How do I find him?

Catch this number, honey.

(SlNGlNG) Sweet thing, Iet me tell you about the world and the way things are

You've come from a different place

And I know you've traveled far

Now that you've told me what it is

l'd better point you towards the Wiz

ALL: He's the Wiz

He's the man, he's the only one

Who can give your wish right to you

ALL: He's the Wizard

He'll send you back through time by running magic through you

All of the super power's his

Listen and I'll tell you where he is

He's the Wiz and he lives in Oz

ALL: He's the Wizard

MlSS ON E: There's the way to the Emerald City That's not too far, is it?

ALL: He's the Wizard

MlSS ON E: Just take your dilemma, child and lay it on the Wizard

He'll fix you a drink that'll bubble and foam

And in a flash you will be home

ALL: He's the Wiz

He's the Wiz, he's the Wizard of Oz He's got magic up his sleeve

ALL: He's the Wizard

And you know without his help it would be impossible to leave

Fantastic powers at his command

(ALL WHOOPlNG)

And l'm sure that he will understand

He's the Wiz and he lives in Oz

(ALL CH EERlNG)

Sweet thing, let me tell you about the world and the way things are now

l'm gonna point you towards the Wiz

(ALL WHOOPlNG)

ALL: He's the Wiz!

MlSS ON E: Fantastic powers at his command

l'm sure that he will understand

ALL: He's the Wiz and he lives in Oz

Sweet thing, let me tell you about the world and the way things are

You've come from a different place

And I know you've traveled far

Now that you've told me what it is

l'd better point you towards the Wiz

He's the Wiz

But how. . . How do I get to the Emerald City?

Oh, just count your blessings and cut your losses

and follow the yellow brick road.

The yellow brick road?

ALL: Yeah ! The yellow brick road !

Toto!

MlSS ON E: Remember, don't ever take those shoes off

and watch out for the poison poppies!

Wait.

(WlN D HOWLlNG)

Miss One?

Miss One!

(SlNGlNG) There's a feeling here inside

That I cannot hide

And I know l've tried

But it's turning me around

l'm not sure that l'm aware

lf l'm up or down

Or here or there

l need both feet on the ground

Maybe l'm just going crazy

Letting myself get uptight

l'm acting just like a baby

But l'm gonna be. . .

l'm gonna be all right

Soon as I get home

(CRYlNG)

Soon as I get home

ln a different place

ln a different time

Different people around me

l would like to know of that different world

And how different they find me

And just what's a Wiz?

ls he big, will he scare me?

lf I ask to leave

Will the Wiz even hear me?

How will I know then

lf I'll ever get home again

Here I am alone

Though it feels the same

l don't know where l'm going

l'm here on my own and it's not a game

And a strange wind is blowing

l'm so amazed at the things that I see here

Don't wanna be afraid

l just don't wanna be here

ln my mind this is clear

What am I doing here?

l wish I was home

l wish...

(CH UCKLlNG)

Wait! Mister, please wait!

(CROW CAWlNG)

(lN DlSTlNCT CHATTERlNG)

(LAUGHS) Succulent and divine!

Delicious and nutritious.

Brother crows, this is good stuff, here!

l'm glad you fellows are enjoying your breakfast.

Hey, fellows,

is today the day you're gonna help me get down from here?

CROWS: Help you down?

What is going down in that hayloft you call a head?

Didn't we tell you yesterday and the day before that

and the day before that?

That you can't get down.

This is your life, buddy, all hung up.

(CROWS LAUGH lNG)

Besides, Clyde, us crows are just thinking of you.

There ain't nothing to get down for.

SCARECROW: But I was just thinking. . . Just once, fellas.

For a little while, just to take a walk in my garden.

Wouldn't that be terrific, fellas?

Walk? You can't walk!

Why, you just a straw paper dummy!

You're right, fellas.

l was just being selfish.

CROWS: And stupid, as usual !

But I was reading this morning that most. . .

Oh, man ! Fellas, please!

Look, didn't we tell you reading was a waste of time?

But Bacon, here, said. . .

CROW 1: Bacon? Once over lightly, please.

"Knowledge is power." See, and Cicero, he said. . .

CROW 2: Cicero-row, row your boat. . . He says,

"More men are ennobled by study than by nature."

(CROWS MOCKlNG)

Hey, fellas.

No way. Ain't no way.

And over here, especially apropos of my situation,

i.e. , stuck up on this here pole.

"Do not accept any situation. Question, argue and explore."

(CROWS LAUGH lNG)

CROW 2: Now, who you gonna believe?

Mr. Nobody, on that old piece of paper?

Fellas, please!

Or your good friends, the crows?

Yeah, who have dedicated their lives to educating you.

Yeah, that's true. Yeah.

Sounds to me, fellas, like old garbage-guts, here,

done forgot the crow commandments again.

Fellas, I did not forget the crow commandments. Please!

Run them by me. Run them by me.

"Thou shalt honor all crows!"

Right on, right on ! Proceed.

"Thou shalt stop reading all bits of paper and literature."

Trash, trash !

And the most important one.

"Thou shalt never, never get down off of this here pole!"

CROWS: You got it, Clyde!

And the crow anthem?

l gotta sing that thing again?

You gotta librett it till you get it.

Elucidate.

Reiterate.

And syncopate.

(SlNGlNG) You can't win

You can't break even and you can't get out of the game

People keep saying things are gonna change

but they look just like they're staying the same

You get in way over your head

and you only got yourself to blame

You can't win, child

CROWS: You can't win, child

You can't break even

and you can't get out of the game

You can't win

The world keeps moving

And you're standing far behind

People keep saying

Things'll get better

CROWS: Just to ease your state of mind

So you lean back

And you smoke that smoke

And you drink your glass of wine

Saying you can't win, child

You can't break even

ALL: And you can't get out of the game

You can't win

You can't win, no way

lf your story stays the same

CROWS: You ain't winning

Oh, no

But it's nice to see you l'm awfully glad you came

CROWS: Better cool it 'cause it ain't about losing

Then the world has got no shame

ALL: You can't win, child

Can't break even

Can't get out of the game

You can't win

You can't break even

Ain't the way it's supposed to be

CROWS: You'll be spending your little bit of money

While someone else rides for free

CROWS: Learn your lesson, refuel your mind

Before some turkey blows out your flame

And you can't win, child

CROWS: No, you can't win

You can't win, child

CROWS: No you can't win

You can't win, child

CROWS: No, you can't win

You can't win, child

CROWS: No, you can't win

You can't win, child

You can't break even

And you can't get out of the game

You can't get out of the game

You can't get out

(EXCLAlMS)

of the game

No, no

(LAUGH lNG)

l'll help you down.

CROW: What?

You will?

(CROWS MU RMU RlNG) What's she doing here?

Hey, get her out of here. Yeah.

(SHOOlNG)

Go on about your business!

(SHOOlNG)

(EXCLAlMlNG)

Just hold on.

Now, this is just an experiment.

Wait.

(SCREAMS)

(CROWS LAUGH lNG)

He ain't got no legs!

The results of the first experiment,

subject is a hopeless failure.

(CROWS LAUGH lNG)

You are not.

Yes, I am.

You're just a product of some negative thinking.

First thing we have to do is get rid of these crows.

Come on, Toto. Sic them ! Get! Shoo!

Before I call the taxidermist, you jive turkeys!

(CROW EXCLAlMlNG)

Good boy, Toto.

(SlGHS) We can go now.

You okay? Come on. Hey.

(SlGHS)

Oh !

l think l'm gonna make it this time.

You sure are.

Just a little self-confidence and coordination,

and you're gonna be fine.

You mean, all this time the only thing standing between hanging up there

and living it up down here, were those crows?

Well, they told you you couldn't do it and you believed them.

lf I only had a brain,

l would have figured that out a long time ago.

There you go with that negative thinking again.

Everybody has a brain.

Uh-uh.

Not me. Look.

Oh.

Garbage.

"lgnorance is the night of the mind,

"a night without moon or star."

Confucius said that.

l'm on my way to find the Wiz.

He's gonna get me back home.

Well, that's nice. Thank you, and good luck.

(CROWS CAWlNG)

(STUTTERlNG)

l thought maybe. . . Maybe he could get you a brain.

(GASPS)

You think that he could. . .

Yeah, Toto and me, we could sure use some company.

Besides, you have nothing to lose.

l don't, do l?

That was so smart of you. l wish l'd thought of that.

lndications are it would be very advantageous for me to join you.

(LAUGHS) Good.

We only have one problem.

The Munchkins said to follow the yellow brick road,

but I haven't been able to find it.

Yellow brick road?

There it is!

Hey, wait! Wait!

Did you say, "Yellow brick road"?

Yes.

SCARECROW: Look over here!

We don't need no cabs.

Say, what's your name?

My name is Dorothy.

Dorothy and Toto?

What intelligent names. (CH UCKLES)

Okay, Dorothy and Toto,

seems like we're gonna have to find our own yellow brick road.

Ease on down. Ease on. . .

Down the road !

There it is.

Ease on down.

Ease on down. . . Down the road !

Oh !

(GRU NTlNG)

Don't you carry nothing that might be a load.

There it is. Dorothy! Look!

(EXCLAlMlNG)

(GASPS)

(CH UCKLlNG)

Ta-da!

(WHOOPlNG) Come on, Dorothy! Come on !

(WHOOPlNG)

BOTH : (SlNGlNG) Come on and ease on down Ease on down the road

Come on, ease on down Ease on down the road

Don't you carry nothing that might be a load

Come on, ease on down Ease on down, down the road

Pick your left foot up When your right one's down

Come on, legs keep moving Don't you lose no ground

Just you keep on keeping on the road that you choose

Don't you give up on walking 'cause you gave up shoes, no

Ease on down, ease on down the road

Come on, ease on down Ease on down the road

Don't you carry nothing that might be a load

Come on, ease on down, ease on down Down, down...

(WHOOPlNG)

Don't you carry nothing that might be a load

Come on, ease on down, ease on down Down the road

Ease on down, ease on down Ease on down the road

(lN DlSTlNCT SlNGlNG)

(BOTH CHATTERlNG)

(LAUGH lNG)

Toto!

Ease on down, ease on down. Ease on. . . Ease on down the road.

MAN : Help! Help!

Help?

Where?

MAN : Help! Help!

Over here!

(CH UCKLlNG)

Help!

Hurry! Hurry!

Where are you?

MAN : Hurry, hurry, hurry. Step right up and save a life.

Oh !

(BOTH GASPlNG)

l'm in a little bit of a squeeze, brother. Can you give me a hand?

Dorothy.

(BOTH GRU NTlNG)

Oh, how terrible.

Don't move.

Don't worry, l wasn't planning any promenades.

We'll be right back.

(GRU NTlNG)

He's so brave.

He's probably in shock.

Oh, what I wouldn't give to be in shock just once.

(GRU NTlNG)

l'm so. . . l'm so sorry.

No apology necessary.

l told you nothing hurts me. l have no feelings.

(GRU NTlNG)

The genius who created me only took care of my dashing good looks,

my razor-sharp wit and my irresistible attraction

to the wrong women.

What he forgot to add

was a heart.

But everyone has a heart.

Alas, everyone but yours truly.

Hello?

(ECHOlNG)

Nobody home in Soulville.

(METAL CREAKlNG)

Rid of you !

Free from your posterior prison, you hulking she-devil.

(LAUGHS)

Don't hear you laughing now.

We were abandoned here when this park went eI foIdo.

Ah, it was a sad day.

There's not much amusement to the closing down of an amusement park.

But yours truly is an old trooper,

and I quickly made plans for the future.

But, alas, l was felled by my fourth wife, Teenie.

Crushed in my prime.

(CREAKlNG)

There. How does that feel?

But that's the whole tragic point, my friends.

(SlNGlNG) What wouId I do

if I could suddenly feel?

And to know once again

That what I feel is real

l could cry, I could smile

l might lay back for a while

Tell me what... What...

TlNMAN : What wouId I do if I could feel?

What would I do

lf I could reach inside of me?

And to know how it feels to say

"l like what I see"

And l'd be more than glad to share

All that I have inside of here

And the songs my heart might bring

You'd be more than glad to sing

And if tears should fall from my eyes

Just think of all the wounds they could mend

And just think of all the time I could spend

Just being vulnerable again

Tell me what...

CHORUS: What, what would I do

Oh, tell me what...

What, what would I do

Oh, tell me what, what would I do

What, what would I do

if I could feel?

(EXCLAlMS) l'm just a miserable hunk of junk. Me!

Once the fastest metal mouth on the midway. Frozen.

lronically, in a position I had assumed all too often.

A seat cushion for Teenie!

(CRYlNG) Teenie, Teenie, Teenie. . .

Dorothy, are you thinking what l'm thinking?

You're so smart.

Teenie, Teenie. . .

You could come with us to see the Wiz.

He's gonna get me back home,

and he's gonna get the Scarecrow some brains.

Maybe he could get you a heart.

You're not just flimflamming an old flimflammer, are you?

Could I come with you? Of course.

"A threefold cord is not quickly broken." (CH UCKLES)

(GRU NTlNG)

What's wrong?

He rusted himself crying.

(MU FFLED) Some oil. Oil !

What? What?

Oil ! Find some oil.

Oil ! Oil ! Some oil !

(SlNGlNG) Slide some oil to me

Let it trickle down my spine

lf you don't have STP Crisco will do just fine

Slide some to my elbow and to my fingers if you would

Slide some oil to me, girl

(WHOOPS)

Don't that feel good

Slide some oil to my feet

Look at that, l got toes again

Come on, slide some oil to my knees

And let me see if I can bend

Slide some oil to me

l'm beginning to feel just fine

Slide some oil down my throat

and let me lubricate my mind

Slide some oil to me

Go ahead, hit my shoulder blades

Those who don't have to lubricate

Sure got it made

Slide some oil to me

Let it slip down my side

Laying there in one position

Sure done made me tired

Now, watch me dance

Come on, you metal metatarsals, don't fail me now.

(BAN D PLAYlNG)

A-ha!

Fall in line or get left behind

(H UMMlNG)

Two bits!

Let me show you my Saturday night finish.

Oh, music man, let me hear that band

Don't turn the water on me, just let me burn

And let me lubricate my mind

(LAUGH lNG)

DOROTHY: Come on

SCARECROW: 'Cause there may be times when think you've lost your mind

And these steps you're taking leave you three, four steps behind

TlNMAN : The road you're walking might be long sometimes

ALL: But you keep on stepping and you'll be just fine

Ease on down, ease on down the road

Come on, ease on down Ease on down the road

Don't you carry nothing that might be a load

Come on, ease on down Ease on down, down the road

Come on

Ease on down Ease on down the road

(lN DlSTlNCT SlNGlNG)

SCARECROW: Look at me walking. (EXCLAlMS)

(DOROTHY LAUGH lNG)

(ALL H UMMlNG)

Stop the music! Stop the music!

SCARECROW: What's the matter? You need more oil?

No!

That beast,

he's checking us out.

Oh.

lt's just a statue.

Made of stone, see?

Now, even a dummy like me knows a stone lion

can't check you out.

(MU FFLED ROARlNG)

(SlNGlNG) Say what you wanna but l'm here to stay

'Cause l'm a mean old lion

(LAUGH lNG)

Now, you can go where you're gonna but don't get in my way

l'm a mean old lion

You'll be standing in a draft

lf you don't hear me laugh

(LAUGHS)

And if you happen to come around

Well, you best not make me frown

For I just might knock you down

l'm a mean old lion

(SNARLlNG)

You know, l'm ready to fight and turn your day into night

'Cause l'm a mean old lion

lf you're half bright you'll detour to the right

From a mean old lion

And all you strangers got to beware

This is the king of the jungle, here

And if I happen to let you slide

Don't stand there, run and hide

You just, you just You just caught my better side

l'm a mean old lion

(GROWLlNG)

Look, you better beware

This is the king of the jungle, here

And if I happen to let you slide

Don't stand there, run and hide

You just done and caught my better side

l'm a mean old lion

Toto!

l'm a mean old lion

(CH UCKLES)

(CLEARS TH ROAT)

How dare you touch the personage of a king?

You tacky package of horse fodder.

Be gone, you overexcited slot machine. (LAUGHS)

(SN lFFlNG)

(TOTO GROWLlNG)

You mangy mutt!

Toto!

(GROANS) Oh !

He bit my paw!

(SOBBlNG)

King of the jungle?

King of the cowards.

DOROTHY: You ought to be ashamed of yourself, scaring us like that.

You big scaredy-cat!

l can't scare anything.

l can't even scare a scarecrow,

or a tinman or a little puppy!

l can't scare anything.

(CRYlNG) Oh !

lt's no wonder they drummed me out of the jungle.

l-O-B-K.

"l-O-B-K"?

lncapable of being king.

(SlGHS)

No, wait, wait!

l was exiled in disgrace.

l thought l'd be safe here. No one would discover my terrible secret.

That l'm. . .

A lion without any courage!

(SOBBlNG)

"Uneasy lies the head that wears a crown."

W. Shakespeare.

Well, I thought l'd seen them all.

But never,

never have I seen

a lion without courage.

(CRYlNG)

Lion !

Lion.

Maybe the Wiz could give you some courage.

lt's a good idea.

Capital suggestion.

Capital. He's gonna get me a heart.

And me some brains.

Come with us to Emerald City.

l'd love to, but I can't.

But why?

(CRYlNG) Because l'm scared.

(SlNGlNG) Oh, there may be times

When you wish you wasn't born

And you wake one morning

Just to find your courage gone

But just know that feeling only lasts a little while

ALL: You just stick with us

And we'll show you how to smile

Ease on down, ease on down the road

Come on, ease on down Ease on down the road

Don't you carry nothing that might be a load

Come on, ease on down Ease on down, down the road

Ease on down, ease on down the road

Come on, ease down, ease down the road

Ease on down, ease on down the road

l gotta get down. . .

Ease on down the road Ease on down the road

(SCATTlNG)

(DOROTHY LAUGH lNG)

(SlGHS)

Mama would be so proud.

Going to see the Wiz.

My mama used to always say to me, Fleet. . .

ALL: Fleet?

That's my name. Fleetwood Coupe de Ville.

(SN lCKERlNG)

Mama had high ideals.

Yeah.

You know what I mean? Yeah !

(LAUGH lNG)

(BELLS TlN KLlNG)

l ain't too happy underground, y'all.

How does he do that?

lt's just a hoax, my friend. He's got a little motor in his pocket.

(LlON GASPlNG)

(ALL SCREAMlNG)

Lion ! Lion ! Help!

Oh, my. . . Please, somebody! Someone, please.

(WH lMPERlNG)

DOROTHY: Lion ! Lion !

(RUMBLlNG)

(SCREAMS)

Lion !

(GRU NTlNG)

(ROARlNG)

(SCREAMlNG)

(GRU NTS)

(CLATTERlNG)

(SCREAMlNG) Lion ! Lion ! Lion !

(GRU NTS) Dorothy! Lion !

(SCREAMS)

(GRU NTlNG)

(ROARlNG)

Toto! Toto, Toto, Toto, Toto.

Hey! Follow me, quick!

DOROTHY: (SCREAMS) Wait!

TlNMAN : Where's the Lion?

l'm coming ! Wait, wait!

Come on ! Let's go!

Hurry up!

This way, this way. Wait for me!

Hey!

(H lSSlNG)

(CHATTERlNG)

(SlNGlNG) Ease on down Ease on down the...

Hold it, hold it, hold it.

My queen, if you'll allow me.

Like I say, you stick with the big kitty and you'll be in heaven.

Out of the frying pan, into the. . . This is like a setup.

SCARECROW: Stay away!

Dorothy!

Lion ! Don't follow them ! Don't!

TlNMAN : Oh, please! lt's a setup!

Stop!

TlNMAN : Come back! Jump! Don't go in there!

(EXCLAlMlNG)

TlNMAN : Oh, Dorothy! Lion !

SCARECROW: Dorothy. Dorothy.

l can't move him. l can't move him !

Get Toto. We'll come back for him.

Oh, look. Poor little Toto!

Pity. Oh, sweet little Toto. What are we going to do?

All is lost!

(CRYlNG) Dorothy. Dorothy, please.

Please, don't be dead. Oh, please, don't be dead.

All is lost.

(CRYlNG)

(SPUTTERlNG)

Oh !

(SlNGlNG) How high the moon

(SCATTlNG)

(LAUGH lNG)

What's happening, babe?

Hey, Lion's okay. LlON : Hey, baby.

Come and cry over here. Come on.

Teenie! Think of Teenie!

Dorothy?

SCARECROW: Think of Teenie!

Teenie, Teenie!

Teenie, Teenie. . . (CRYlNG) lt's all my fault.

Teenie, Teenie. . .

Oh, mighty Zeus and gods of the universe!

Why have you cursed this lowly, mangy animal so?

Once I was a king. A lion amongst lions.

Ruler of a beautiful kingdom by a waterfall,

attended by butterflies and sparrows,

and now, banished for lack of courage. (DOROTHY MOAN lNG)

l cannot even protect these friends who have been so kind to me.

l was strong and brave in the subway,

only to be foolish and weak again.

l led us into the very jaws of death !

Oh, let me end it all !

Lion, Lion ! No!

No, let me splatter to the four winds!

lt's all right, Lion. lt's all right.

Everything's all right.

The worst is over, my furry friend.

Would you lay an appropriate quote

on this poor beastie, brother?

"Showers expected late tomorrow."

(SOBBlNG)

Lion?

(DOROTHY H UMMlNG)

(SlNGlNG) There is a place we'll go

Where there is mostly quiet

Flowers and butterflies

A rainbow lives beside it

And from a velvet sky

The summer storm

You can feel

the coolness in the air

But you're still warm

And then a mighty roar

Will start the sky

to crying

But not even lightning

Will be frightening

My lion

And with no fear inside

No need to run

No need to hide

You're standing strong and tall

You're the bravest of them all

lf on courage

you must call

Then just keep on trying

and trying and trying

You're a lion

ln your own way

be a lion

Come on, be a lion.

l'm standing strong and tall

You're the bravest

of them all

lf on courage you must call

Keep on trying and trying and trying

Trying and trying and trying

l'm a lion in my own way

l'm a lion

A lion

l'm a lion

(ALL LAUGH lNG)

How do we get in?

And how do you do? Good evening, there, brother.

This place is nice.

The service entrance is at the side.

LlON : Hold on, now. TlNMAN : Not so fast. . .

DOROTHY: We're here to see the Wiz.

SCARECROW: Yeah, the Wiz.

DOROTHY: This is where the Wiz lives, isn't it?

(BEEPlNG)

May I welcome you to the Emerald City.

(SAMBA MUSlC PLAYlNG)

(SlNGlNG) l want to be seen green

Wouldn't be caught dead red

ALL: 'Cause if you are seen green

lt means you've got mean bread

You've got to be seen green to show that your stuff's laid

lf you're not seen green

You'd better be wearing jade

You've got to be seen green

Don't tell him your cupboard's bare

That you gave up one week's feed

To pay for your colored hair

(TRUMPET BLOWlNG)

(ALL EXCLAlMlNG)

MAN: An announcement from the great and powerful Oz.

(ECHOlNG)

WlZ: I thought it over and green is dead.

Till I change my mind, the color's red.

(MUSlC PLAYlNG)

(SlNGlNG) l wouldn't be seen green

(EXCLAlMlNG)

l wouldn't be caught dead

And if l'm caught at all

Then catch me in dead red

You've got to be dead red

You've got to be real hot

So throw away those green gems

And wear rubies on your yacht

You've got to be dead red

You've got to have flash and flair

And if you're not seen red

Then you shouldn't be seen nowhere

(ALL SHOUTlNG)

(TRUMPET BLOWlNG)

WlZ: How quick fashion goes down the drain.

Last week, when you all was wearing pink, already for me, red was old.

The ultimate yellow brick is gold.

MAN : That's the new coIor, children, hit it.

ALL: (SlNGlNG) Golden gold

Golden gold

You've got to be seen gold Watch out for the new kind

You've got to have old gold like some from a gold mine

You've got to be wearing gold The 24 karat kind

And once you've shined it up it should ought to make you blind

You've got to be seen in gold to show that you're super slick

lt helps to pay tips and tolls

lt's the ultimate yellow brick

lt's the ultimate

Gold

Golden gold

Gold, gold, gold, gold, gold

(TRUMPET BLOWlNG)

MAN: An announcement from the great and powerful Oz.

WIZ: Send up the one with the silver slippers.

(lN DlSTlNCT CHATTERlNG)

MAN 1: Do you know how lucky you are?

WOMAN 1: l've been trying to get an appointment for two years.

MAN 2: l've been trying for four years.

WOMAN 2: No one, but no one, sees the Wiz.

l always knew you'd make it, dear.

Who does your hair?

MAN 3: Can you come for dinner next Wednesday?

MAN 4: Put in a good word for me.

Can I give you my card?

Can I take you home tonight?

(CROWD APPLAU DlNG)

And. . .

(CROWD LAUGH lNG)

MAN 5: Every man for himself.

(CHATTERlNG EXClTEDLY)

Only the one with the silver slippers.

You go ahead, Dorothy.

He who hesitates. . . Et cetera, et cetera.

l'd like to speak to the Wiz.

(CROWD MU RMU RlNG)

Hey, mike.

(WH lSTLES)

Excuse me... (FEEDBACK)

(ECHOlNG) Excuse me, sir, Mr. Wiz?

WlZ: Speak.

I'm not alone, sir.

l'm here with my three companions and my dog, Toto.

WlZ: Forget it. No riffraff.

(CROWD LAUGH lNG)

They're not riffraff, sir.

They're my friends and they've traveled very far to see you.

(CH UCKLES N ERVOUSLY)

l said forget it!

Then... Then l'm not coming up there.

(RUMBLlNG)

(CROWD SCREAMlNG)

WlZ: What?

Either you see my friends, sir, or you forget it.

Send up the riffraff.

(SlGHS)

(CROWD MU RMU RlNG)

(CLEARS TH ROAT)

What's happening?

Step forward.

Sure wish I was back at the library.

So you wanted to meet the Wizard?

What do you sniveling deadbeats want?

That's close enough!

My name is Dorothy and. . .

And l'm trying to get home.

And these are my friends. This is the Scarecrow.

(STUTTERS) He wants. . . Tell him.

A brain, Your Majesty. Some of your great wisdom.

And this is the Tinman.

l been a two-bit carnie hustler all my life,

and I want a heart, O mighty and powerful Wiz.

A heart so I can love all humanity.

And what do you want, you overstuffed animal cracker?

l wanna get the hell out of here!

He wants some courage, sir.

So he can go back to his old job of being king of the jungle.

WIZ: Is this so, Lion?

Anything she says.

Can you help us, sir?

What's in it for me?

We'd be very grateful.

(LAUGH lNG)

How about your pretty silver slippers?

No!

No?

You dare say no to the great Wizard of Oz?

(STUTTERS) But I was. . . So I told. . .

l can't take these off till I get back home, but I'll send them to you.

The great Oz has decided not to grant any of your wishes!

Unless... Unless, you, Dorothy,

kill Evillene, the Wicked Witch of the West!

The great Oz has spoken!

But Mr. Wiz, please!

(KNOCKlNG AT DOOR)

Come in.

l'm sorry I dragged you all here, and look how it turned out.

Have you made your decision yet, Dorothy?

l don't think there's any choice.

Well, Dorothy, you don't have to do it. We could stay right here.

Hey, the Emerald City's not a bad place.

Get a small apartment. Chip in together.

Hey, I bet in no time we'd fit right in.

But I could never be happy here.

Besides, l'd never get home.

l have to go all the way, even if it means to Evillene.

Come on, Toto. Good boy.

Then l'm going with you.

Likewise.

Me, too.

Come on.

Which road do we take?

Road? (LAUGHS)

This one, and you may be sorry.

And how do we find Evillene?

Don't worry. She'll find you.

(GROANS)

(SlNGlNG) Now, when I wake up in the afternoon which it pleases me to do

Don't nobody bring me no bad news

'Cause I wake up already negative and l've fired up my fuse

So don't nobody bring me no bad news

Now, if we're gonna be buddies

You better bone up on the rules

'Cause don't nobody bring me no bad news

You can be my best of friends As opposed to paying dues

But don't nobody bring me no bad news

Well, no bad news

No bad news

Now, don't you ever bring me no bad news

'Cause I'll make you an offer, child That you cannot refuse

So don't nobody bring me no bad news

Now, when you're talking to me Don't be crying blues

'Cause don't nobody bring me no bad news

ALL: No bad news!

You can verbalize, vocalize But just bring me the clues

But don't nobody bring me no bad news

Bring the message in your head

Or in something you can't lose

But don't you ever, ever Bring me no bad news

lf you gotta bring me something Make it something I can use

But don't you bring me no bad news

Well, no bad news ALL: No bad news

No bad news

ALL: No bad news

Now, don't you bring me no bad news

'Cause I'll make you an offer, child That you cannot refuse

So don't you bring me no bad news

Work!

(EVlLLEN E SCATTlNG)

(ALL SHOUTlNG)

Don't nobody bring me no bad news

lf you're gonna bring me something bring me something I can use

But don't you ever bring me no bad news

'Cause I'll make you an offer, child that you cannot refuse

So don't nobody bring me no bad news

l say don't nobody bring me no bad news

l say don't you bring me Don't you bring me

Don't you bring me

Don't

Don't bring me

l say don't

Don't you ever bring me

Don't you ever bring me, bring me, bring me bring me, bring me

no bad news

(BELL TOLLlNG)

(SHOUTlNG)

Work! Work! Work! Work!

Work! Work! Work!

And all lunch hours are canceled !

Oh, please, oh, beautiful one.

We haven't had a lunch hour in six months.

Well, suffering is food for the soul.

Now, suffer!

(EVlL LAUGH)

So no one stopped Dorothy, eh?

All right! Amateur night is over!

l'm summoning my flying monkeys!

ALL: No! No! Not the flying monkeys!

Yes, yes, the flying monkeys!

l hate to have to do this myself

because I can't stand the smells,

but these are red-alert conditions!

(GASPlNG)

A hot fire.

(BELL RlNGlNG)

(EXCLAlMS lN DlSGUST)

What's happening?

Don't come any closer.

l got a little job for you, Cheetah.

Bring me Dorothy, the Scarecrow,

the Tinman, the Lion and the dog, too.

How do you want them? White bread or rye?

(MON KEYS LAUGH lNG)

(LAUGH lNG)

(ALL LAUGH lNG)

(BU RPS)

You get smart with me and I'll send you back to your cages.

Now, get Dorothy, and don't damage those silver slippers!

(SHOUTlNG)

(EXCLAlMS)

War is hell !

Hit it, Morris!

ALL: (SlNGlNG) Don't nobody bring me

Don't nobody bring me

Don't nobody bring me no bad news

(MU RMU RlNG)

l ain't scared. l ain't got nothing to be scared about.

(SCREAMlNG)

Hey, brother!

Not now!

(BARKlNG)

Lion ! Wait for me!

Get back, I told you !

(PANTlNG)

Psst, psst, psst!

Psst!

Psst, psst, psst! We're over here.

Psst, psst! Lion. Hey, brother.

You better get out of the way for me.

(WH lMPERlNG)

Toto! Where's Toto? Toto!

(SH USH lNG)

Toto. Toto. Toto. Toto. Hey, there he is.

Come on, Toto. Toto.

TlNMAN : (WH lSPERlNG) l think we're safe.

(SH USH lNG)

So you're Dorothy?

You murdered my sister!

A saint she was.

And stole her shoes! Give them to me.

No. What?

No!

All right! You. . .

(EVlLLEN E SCREAMlNG)

(GASPlNG)

Don't worry, Dorothy. lt doesn't hurt.

lt's just a little rough on my filing system.

(EXCLAlMS)

(CRYlNG)

(LAUGH lNG)

Never fear, my little flower. l'm just a hollow shell !

(CRYlNG)

(EXCLAlMS)

(GROANS)

Don't give up the shoes, Dorothy!

(SOBBlNG)

Would you like sauerkraut or mustard, my dear,

on your hot dog?

(WH lMPERlNG)

(LAUGHS)

Toto! Toto! No, don't.

(LAUGH lNG)

No, don't. Don't you dare! Toto, Toto.

Now will you give me those shoes?

Yes! Yes, yes.

That's what I thought.

(SOBBlNG)

Psst.

Hurry up with those shoes.

No, don't touch that! (ALARM SOU N DlNG)

(SCREAMlNG)

No!

Toto.

No! l'm allergic to water.

lt makes me melt. No, no. No!

(GASPlNG) Please.

(SCREAMlNG)

(GU RGLlNG)

Please, help! Please, help me with my friends!

Here he is. I got him.

Put him together. l don't care what you do.

Put him down. Put him together. Okay.

Where's his arm? His. . .

Okay, okay, okay. Do something.

Okay, get some tools. Get something.

Tools! A crowbar, a hammer. Don't hurt him.

(ALL CH EERlNG)

(SlNGlNG) Everybody look around

'Cause there's a reason to rejoice, you see

ALL: Everybody come out and let's commence to singing joyfully

Everybody look up and feel the hope we've been waiting on

ALL: Everybody be glad because our silent fear and dread is gone

Freedom, you see has got our hearts singing so joyfully

Just look around You owe it to yourself to check it out

Can't you feel a brand-new day?

(WHOOPlNG)

Hey

Everybody be glad 'cause the sun is shining just for us

Everybody wake up lnto the morning, into happiness

Hello, world lt's like a different way of living now

And thank you world l always knew that we'd be free somehow

ALL: ln harmony let's show the world that we've got liberty

lt's such a change for us to live so independently

Freedom, you see has got our hearts singing so joyfully

Just look around You owe it to yourself to check it out

Can't you feel a brand-new day?

Everybody be glad ALL: Be glad!

Because the sun is shining just for us ALL: Yes, it is!

Everybody wake up ALL: Wake up!

lnto the morning, into happiness

ALL: That's right!

Hello, world lt's like a different way of living now

Thank you, world l always knew that we'd be free somehow

ALL: ln harmony Let's show the world that we've got liberty

lt's such a change for us to live so independently

Freedom, you see has got our hearts singing so joyfully

Just look around You owe it to yourself to check it out

Can't you feel a brand-new day?

Yeah!

All right!

Hey!

Can't you feel a brand-new day?

Brand-new day Brand-new day

Can't you feel a brand-new day?

Brand-new day

Can't you feel a brand-new day?

Brand-new day Brand-new day

Can't you feel a brand-new day?

Brand-new day Brand-new day

Can't you feel a brand-new day?

(WHOOPlNG)

Hello?

Where are we?

This must be the back door.

Well, I don't think the killers of the Wicked Witch of the West

should be using the back door. You know what I mean?

(ALL CH UCKLlNG)

Cheetah says it's a shortcut.

Goodbye, Cheetah.

Goodbye, Dorothy.

Bye.

lt's open.

Hello? Hello, in there!

Wait.

Wait a minute.

Does this look familiar?

DOROTHY: Guess who got had?

SCARECROW: Barnum said, "There's a sucker born every minute."

TlNMAN : I heard him. l was there when he said it,

but I never thought l'd be one of them.

Phony!

(CRYlNG) You're nothing but a phony.

l'm out!

The Wizard's out. He's not here. Out!

Lies!

No more lies.

TlNMAN : You charlatan. l've seen men shot for less.

You're a terrible man.

Should I finish him right here?

l'm sorry!

Sorry?

l'm sorry. l'm sorry.

l'm sorry. l'm sorry. l'm sorry.

Phony. l'm sorry.

Everything they say about me is true. l'm a phony.

l got no powers. l got no right to be pretending to be the Wiz.

l've got nothing. Hocus-pocus. Nothing.

l'm just plain old Herman Smith from Atlantic City.

Atlantic City? Atlantic City?

You mean, you're from New Jersey?

Mmm-hmm.

l'm just a second-rate politician from District 7.

"Public office is the last refuge of the incompetent."

Penrose.

lncompetent? (LAUGHS) That's me.

l'm incompetent. So much so, l could never get elected to public office.

Not because I didn't try. l tried everything.

Look, look. l ran for any and everything.

Alderman, councilman, assembly leader.

l became a laughingstock. l couldn't even get on the ticket.

Finally, in desperation,

l ran for dogcatcher.

(BARKlNG)

l like animals. Don't get me wrong. l like animals.

l was at the end of my rope. l plunged myself into the campaign.

One desperate grandstand play. You know what I did?

l rented a hot-air balloon.

TlNMAN : Hot air. That's a perfect vehicle for you.

No, no, no. No. lt was a beautiful Fourth of July day.

l planned to fly over the boardwalk

and the beach, and throw my. . . (EXCLAlMS)

Throw my leaflets to the astonished crowds below.

My motto was,

"Vote for Smith. Your best bet to catch that pet."

But just when I got up in the balloon,

a terrible storm came up and blew me into the clouds.

l got lost.

l landed here in Oz.

They'd never seen a hot-air balloon like mine before.

And I know I should have told them the truth,

but they proclaimed me the Wizard, (WH lSPERS) and I needed the job.

(CRYlNG) And you mean you sent us to kill Evillene

knowing we might never come back?

She would've killed me.

She would've found out I had no power, and she'd have took over Oz.

That's no excuse. Come on.

Please! Please, don't go.

l live here all alone in terror

that someone will find out that l'm a fraud.

Please, just stay with me for a little while and talk.

You can talk to me crazy, call me names.

What's the matter?

Now I'll never get my brain.

Nor my heart.

Or my courage.

But you don't need them now

because you've had them all along. Scarecrow. Scarecrow?

You're the one who figured out how to find the yellow brick road,

and how to destroy Evillene, and every smart move we've made.

Didn't you? Didn't you?

And Lion,

you wouldn't even give up when Evillene strung you up by your tail.

And Tinman,

you have more heart than anyone l've ever known.

Honest?

Yes.

You never needed anything from the fake Wizard anyway.

(SlNGlNG) lf you believe

within your heart

You'll know that no one can change

The path that you must go

Believe what you feel

And know you're right because

The time will come around

When you say it's yours

Believe there's a reason to be

Believe you can make time stand still

You know from the moment you try

lf you believe

l know you will

Believe in yourself right from the start

You'll have brains

You'll have a heart

You'll have courage

To last your whole life through

lf you believe in yourself

as I believe in you

What about you, Dorothy? You'll never get home.

Me?

l guess you're stuck with Toto and me.

(BELLS TlN KLlNG)

WlZ: lt's Glinda, the Good Witch of the South. She has great powers.

Hello, Dorothy.

Please. ls there a way for me to get home?

Oh, Dorothy, you were wise and good enough

to help your friends find what was inside them all the time.

That's true for you, also.

Home?

lnside me? l don't understand.

Home is a place we all must find, child.

lt's not just a place where you eat or sleep.

Home is knowing.

Knowing your mind, knowing your heart, knowing your courage.

lf we know ourselves, we're always home anywhere.

(SlNGlNG) If you beIieve within your heart

You'll know

That no one can change

The path that you must go

Believe what you feel

and know you're right because

The time will come around

When you'll say it's yours

Believe that you can go home

Believe you can float on air

Yes, click your heels three times

lf you believe

and then you'll be there

That's why I want you to believe in yourself

Yes, right from the start you've got to believe

Believe in the magic right there in your heart

Go ahead, believe all these things

Not because I told you to now

Go ahead and believe Believe in yourself

Ooh, yeah, believe Believe in yourself

Ooh, yeah, yeah, yeah, believe in yourself

as I believe in you

You mean,

l could have gone home by clicking my heels three times?

Uh-huh.

WlZ: Dorothy.

Can you do something for me?

They've had what they've been searching for in them all along.

l don't know what's in you. You'll have to find that out for yourself.

But I do know one thing,

you'll never find it in the safety of this room.

l tried that all my life. lt doesn't work.

There's a whole world out there,

and you'll have to begin by letting people see who you really are.

Success,

fame and fortune, they're all illusions.

All there is that is real

is the friendship

that two can share.

That's beautiful. Who said that?

l did.

(CRYlNG) Oh, Dorothy.

l'll think of you all the time.

And I will miss you every day.

Even if I had to go back to that junk pile,

even as Teenie's seat cushion, l wouldn't mind,

because I have known real love.

Oh, don't rust yourself, now.

Oh, Dorothy.

lf it hadn't been for you,

l'd still be back on that pedestal,

afraid to live.

Me, too.

Thank you.

Thank you for being my friends.

l'm ready now.

Think of home.

Home.

(SlNGlNG) When I think of home

l think of a place

Where there's love overflowing

l wish I was home

l wish I was back there

With the things l've been knowing

Wind that makes the tall trees

bend into leaning

Suddenly the snowflakes that fall

have a meaning

Sprinkling the scene

Makes it all clean

Maybe there's a chance for me to go back

Now that I have some direction

lt would sure be nice to be back home

Where there's love and affection

And just maybe l

can convince time to slow up

Giving me enough time in my life to grow up

Time, be my friend

Let me start again

Suddenly, my world's gone

And changed its face

But I still know where l'm going

l have had my mind spun around in space

And yet l've watched it growing

And if you're listening, God

Please don't make it hard

To know if we should believe the things

that we see

Tell us, should we run away?

Should we try and stay?

Or would it be better just to let things be?

Living here in this brand new world

might be a fantasy

But it taught me to love

So it's real, real to me

And l've learned

That we must look inside our hearts

to find

A world full of love

like yours, like mine

Like home