Original subtitles

Extreme manoeuvrability, versatility, and ease of use..

And in flight refuelling capability

The Mirage IV can be defined the military airplane most economical..

and most perfect of our time.

Both for its vertical flight

It's combination of extraordinary striking power

And short landing and take off capabilities

Make it the perfect air weapon for all defensive operations

representing the ultimate in perfection, in modern aeronautical technique.

Catch him!

Oh,excuse me, general..

I'm terribly sorry, sir.. - I'm alright..

You have good reflexes, my compliments..

This inactivity makes me rusty..

I have the cure, follow me...

Are you are injured general ? - No, I have strong bones.

It has only...

That's it ! - You have invented black powder ?

An explosive of mine,

Just stick half a gram of this juice in a cannon, and BOOM!

Oh,excuse me general...

We will see about this later. We have to talk..

The trade of 40 Mirages IV to Turkey.

What am I to do with that ? I am a DST agent, not a commercial one.

Some people don't agree with this kind of import/export.

Let me explain...

The Turks send us a commercial delegation

to sign the deal of 40 mirages IV's.

Minister Baskine and his suite will be at Orly tomorrow morning.

And you have think of me to welcome them

with the sound of the Turkish March...

It's no joke...

Believe me Minister Baskin will probably be shot on his arrival.

Come on come on, you know that there are no more

political attacks in France, general.

Take this... The Turkish embassy in Paris got it this morning...

Who is this handsome young man ? - He is Baskine...

Well, is that all ?

No, Berthelot our technical consultant from Ankara

has just been assassinated...

Jacques... - Yes..

Falling on the international commerce's field of honour...

Risking one's life... - Risking one's life that's very nice.

But then, you have to earn one's life...

And to earn one's life, you die like you can...

Oh, that's enough Rapi�re

Being called The Tiger, doesn't allow you to eat everything...

The commando, the leopard's suit, that's history...

Let's say, memories...

Then remember that the war is over...

Now get to work... The work is always damn boring...

So let's get the work done..

And vive le Turks...

Guardian angels of the Turks! Service handyman!

The way things are going, we�ll soon be directing traffic in front of the opera

we might work up to guard on the Eiffel tower, if we're good

Look tiger, all of us cant be heroes every day..

Do you want to hear my latest?

It's a gun that shoots backwards How about that?

You leave it lying around, the hood makes a grab for it, and boom, he shoots himself..

It shoots backwards, here�s the plans

When you get one that shoots around corners, let me know..

Break it up, we�re not here to huddle, go on...

How about a camera in a glass eye?

For one eyed spies, not bad, don�t you think?

Do you really want an answer? - But it's a sure thing..

Simply blink once for each picture

When I lose an eye, I�ll get back to you..

Ahh,there she is..

A drink?

Is that the daughter? No, that�s the mother..

Mr Baskine.. And that's the daughter..

And who's that?

A minister in his cabinet, a Mr Coubassi...

The Turks have better taste in women, than I thought..

You don�t suppose one of them could use a bodyguard?

Stop that, or I'll tell your mother..

A beer and a scotch..

There they are.. Look at me.. Look at me!

Sit down, please

Mister Minister ? Ah...

Yes, it is a great honour

A great honour, I share with my countrymen..

With all my countrymen.. I welcome you here today..

And soon, our planes like good omen messengers

shall fly in the oriental sky

Dove of a cloudless horizon,

winged messenger of eternal France..

Vive la Turkey.. Vive la France !

It's my great honour to be, for you, the interpreter of mister Baskine

my husband, who does not yet master, the nuance..

.. and subtlety, of your beautiful language...

Hello... - Very good...

First of all, we apologize for not being the most quiet of guests...

You are referring to the terrorist organisation, "masai"?

"Masai" ? Never heard of it...

Our lives would be threatened ?

Oh come on! I've got to laugh... I've got to laugh..

Shoot.. shoot!

My feminine intuition has never betrayed me.

I know that we risk nothing, on the sweet land of France...

Are we not in the country

of charm and poetry ?

I shall never surrender, in front of ridiculous threats

which are nothing more to us, than scarecrows to sparrows.

The protocol agreement between France and Turkey will be signed.

Vive la France, vive la Turkey!

He forgot to declare this to the customs.

Not only is it bad for business, it lowers our standing..

Is that idiot what you call a hired killer? Where did you find him, the wants adds?

How could I know? He had good references..

As what, a cook?.. He's about as deadly as the salvation army..

Things aren't like they were in the old days

They want overtime pay and a health plan before they touch a job

Get me the hotel - Okie dokie..

Hello, room 416 please..

One moment, if you please..

117

I�m sending the storage locker number of the key..

Who's calling? - This is Dubrovsky..

Dubrovsky..

Who do you want to speak to sir? This is the blind watchman..

Mr Benitez is out of town till the 10th.. Have you any message for Mr Benitez?

Yes..

Will you be quiet back there!

Just say, if he don�t come by with the cash tonight, he�s in real trouble..

A drink?

If he thinks I'm going to pay him a single penny..

Now that this has gone up in smoke...

What amateurs...

Do you want to go in there?

Why don�t we squeeze you in with the broken taillights..

Put me down!

Get your hands off my little brother..

Oh,excuse me.. but I did knock.. But with the music and er...

Stop beating around the bush, what is it that you want?

Mr Louis Rapi�re is outside, and he wishes to see you..

Mr Rapier, oh.. tell him to come in..

But mother, you cant see him like this.. Shouldn't you put on some clothes?

Don�t be old fashioned, go and get him..

What are you, a Turkish poodle? Or...

Don�t waste your time, he only speaks Turkish..

If you'd care to go in..

Ah,Mr Rapi�re, how nice..

The pleasure is all mine, madam

What a heavenly country, France is They even furnish guardian angels.

You know, we�re counting on you, to take us all around Paris

We are simply wild about shopping, I adore buying..

Do you window shop? - It's my passion..

I dreamed once I'd driven the country bankrupt at Christian Dior's

Well, as long as you spend less on your dresses

Than on your Mirage IV's..

My, you�re one of the nicest agents I've met..

I'm sure we're going to be very good friends

You Mehlica, and me...

Ahh Paris..

You know I'm the most Parisienne girl in Turkey?

Is that a fact..

I have French blood.. French blood?

Yes, my father was Bulgarian, my mother Italian..

But I was born in Paris - Ahh,that's French enough..

Take this, will you...

One day my husband decided to go into party politics

And you went along for the fun - Exactly..

We started in Istanbul, then moved to Ankara

Now I'm the wife of the minister of commerce

And then my daughter came

Your mother has good taste in daughters, miss..

We've talked enough about me.. Tell us about yourself..

Oh,it's too dull to tell.. - Oh,you are just too modest..

If you really want to know..

I joined the foreign legion at 20 - A girl I suppose, was it a love affair?

Ah,no.. a colonel.. An uppercut..

My, you must have the strength of a lion

Some say a tiger..

Man eating head-hunters.. Parachuted among the cannibals..

Imagine, they might have eaten you alive..

I was lucky enough to drop in on them after supper..

Care for more cream, madam? - Yes, I�d love some..

Thank you so much.. - No thank you..

The tiger riding on the miniature train Amusing, don�t you think?

Very funny..

The last time I had a ride on this train, I was 10..

You grow younger every day, madam - No..

Hands off!

That makes it !

And you think I didn't see you !

It doesn't seem so !

You look so natural..

Exalting professional conscience !

Soon you will trained enough to work as packer in "Les galeries Lafayette" !

What a shame to end like this !

You haven't forgotten this exhilarating summer afternoon,

when a self-sufficient mother left her daughter in the claws of a tiger

dressed up as a sly cat and a catfish...

The swimming-pool trick,

to show her you are not underdeveloped...

Venus swimming out of a wave

in Apolon's arms...

Knowing that I will have to endure, this Louis Rapi�re all the evening...

You are free to prefer your anaemic douche bags...

Sorry madam, I didn't notice...

Are you doing this in purpose ? You always arrived at the right time...

The new birdcage has just been delivered.

Oh the darlings, how happy they will be...

Leave it in the living room... - Yes madam...

After all, now I know the Tiger, I can't stand that weasel anymore.

There...

I detest opera, what a monkey house...

My little girl, we have public responsibilities...

I strongly advise you not to talk like this in front of your father...

Back in his time, he had got a marvellous voice...

This was delivered.. It's another note..

They evidently don�t know how to draw...

This evening should distract you...

Security have advised me not to go..

You go without me..

What a pity my friend, what a sad evening without you...

Mister Minister...

So it's understood,

during the great tune, at the third applause...

Berenice Benjazet...

Metredate.. - Mitridate..

Mehlica! They've kidnapped Mehlica..

Here, drink this.. It'll buck you up..

Why didn't you have them open?

You shouldn't open beer before you drink it...

When it hits the air, it decomposes..

Here, it�ll help you get back your strength..

They made me look like a novice..

More bread than ham..

What I cant understand, is why they did the

2 attacks simultaneously.. - They wanted to be sure they'd succeed..

But their only goal was to kill Baskine..

Kidnapping Mehlica is useless, when killing Baskine,

politically it's completely idiotic... - Maybe they're idiots..

No, but certain things are inexplicable..

I once read in a book.. - You mean you've read a book?

Oh look..

I read, inexplicable effects, are explained by their cause...

What are you doing? - Imagining causes

My sandwich is composed of 2 slices of bread, and 1 slice of ham..

Right?

The slice of ham, always stays on the same side of the bread..

Take away one slice of bread, my sandwich becomes a tartine, agree?

The other slice, has to look for some ham

to become a tartine,agree?

He's goofy..

The best thing for it to do..

Is to grab off the ham, which it knows is on the other slice of bread..

That was why they kidnapped Mehlica..

Do you think we should call a doctor?

Part of the gang who were at Orly airport

Have kidnapped Mehlica, to put pressure on the others..

Baskine's strangler did not know that Mehlica would be kidnapped

And the party that kidnapped Mehlica,

didn't know that Baskine was to be killed..

We don�t have one gang operating now, we have two..

Oh shit !

Everyone in this mess, now has 2 opponents to contend with..

The stranglers have the kidnappers and us..

The kidnappers have the stranglers and us..

And who do we have? 3 guesses..

262

We have the kidnappers and the stranglers..

And so what do we do now? - I'm going to catch hell!

I'll long remember this visit to Paris, I assure you..

They've kidnapped my daughter..

They've murdered my husband!

Your husband is not dead madam,

I regret that.. - Oh,you regret it?

Do you think this is the right time for jokes ?

That was a figure of speech!

Instead of giving me French lessons,

why don�t you learn how to run your business..

Oh,this is too much!

It may be, that in your country the women are wearing the trousers in the ministry

But in France, in the DST, my k�pi will stay on my head..

Well then, act.. react, I don't know, send in the troops

but do something, and don�t stand there doing nothing..

Oh stop it, will you? Both of you have said enough..

And that's enough out of you, Rapi�re..

You seem to forget your career is at risk here..

There's one thing that I don't forget, this girls life is at stake..

Where are you going? - Shit !

We weren't able to get a word out of him..

He keeps coming out with the same old song..

We were about to catch a plane..

We were going to Africa to hunt elephants.. - In Kenya?

Yes, which explains the telescope on the pistol..

Alright,if you guys love elephants

we're gonna bring you to the circus, cute boys..

First, of this gentlemen will go on stage,

get the material prepared

Shall we start by the feet, boss ? - No, on the head, we�re in a hurry..

Let him have it..

The blackjack..

He's got a head like a rock.. My hands are sore..

Yeah,I guess you better start on the feet..

Alright,lay him on the floor

His blood is all over me..

I'll never get it off..

Try a little hot water..

He's bleeding like an ox - He's stopped twitching..

Better get the smelling salts..

While we're waiting for him to come around You can keep us company..

You must be awfully tired of waiting

Want us to blindfold you?

Don�t do it, I�ll tell you everything.. Honest..

You're a lot more intelligent, than your late friend was..

How is it going ?

A pleasure, the minister strangled, the other stricken, they need to recover

Perfect...

Hey, you're not gonna steal the shoes of "de vignac' boss?

Dubrovsky,he's the one who's supposed to pay us

Where does he live? - You think he'd tell me that?

I'm only one of the employees..

I ran into him by accident, at a wrestling match..

5 Canal Street..

I was taken to meet him by a small dwarf..

A dwarf? - Yes, but don�t ask me his name..

Nobody told me..

Go pick up all the dwarves in Paris..

All? - All!

Anything new?

Yeah,we're going to a wrestling match, I will explain to you later..

And in Trianon ? - Oh,in Trianon everything is fine..

Except Duvet.. - Duvet?

Yeah,he suddenly decided he wants to shine shoes for head of cabinet..

He must have invented a new wax..

Mr Dubrovsky? - He's in the dressing room..

Please come with me, gentlemen..

These gentlemen would like to talk to the boss..

The boss just stepped outside..

What do you want from Mr Dob?

His address.. - What do you want his address for?

I want to send him a post card..

You can send it here, I�ll forward it.. - Forward this!

Leave him to me!

Murderer...

Everything ok ?

Where does Dubrovsky live? What street?

Rue des martyres

Number? - Eight..

What floor? - Fifth floor..

Right, as you get out of the elevator..

Answer the door.. dumb bell..

Can we talk freely in front of her?

Sure, all she understands, is scotch..

She can't help it, she�s an alcoholic

If it weren't for me.. She'd be in an asylum..

Love is a wonderful thing..

So, what is it that you want?

Cash.. - How much?

1 million...

Are you in a position to demand? - I have the Baskine girl..

You swine.. - The girl will get the full treatment..

You have my word on that..

Get me the cash, or they'll get the girl back in 16 pieces

You're going too far..

Is it a deal?

The cash, you get the girl back..

If not, I�ll burn her

I don't understand you Dob..

Think it over, What is our goal?

Ensure that purchase of Mirage IV's by Turkey, doesn�t take place

That's your goal too..

And we both know that Baskine will never sign the purchase agreement..

Until his daughter has been returned, safe and sound..

Yes, but suppose I sent her back on a slab?

Now do you get the point Suppose I do the daughter in?

What will the dear father do?

Afraid but stoic, he'll sign..

Only as revenge against the terrorist

Then he will return in homeland, a hero and a martyr..

Now do you see it's in your interest to pay me the cash?

Unless of course, your employer wants to see the agreement signed after all

You're not being reasonable,Dob..

It's foolhardy, to oppose a man, who'll stop at nothing..

Have you forgotten the Louisiana steamboat case ? the Saigon case ?

378

The murder of Lord Bodding-Brooke, it was nice no ?

A drink?

With pleasure..

1 million.. Are you insane?

If you believe one can sell himself to everyone, without buying anyone..

Of course for you it is simple, as a double agent..

I'll speak to the boss..

Let me tell you something..

Your kind of scum is rare, even in my world..

You're unique..

Yes... I can't talk about this on the telephone.

It's very bad... Yes, I need to see you...

Don't forget to kiss the kids for me !

Pay him, but don't lose them !

And at the first opportunity, burst them !

About the briefcase, what do we do ?

This is the key of the deposit, number 329...

Do what is needed to be done, now !

I will send my little brother...

Do what you want..

This time, we've got them ! - But we don't have any lawful clue..

Don't bother with that for once.

Here, they started the car!

We have to follow them, but not spoil their confidence.

What would we do without you...

For Dubrovsky, we let go ?

Dubrovsky... He's mine.

I wonder if you would mind lifting me up please...

I cant quite make it..

Sure.. - Thanks..

If I do it, I shall get a pardon for everything?

Not everything, but many things...

You bet your life on it, son...

You shall not lose...

Ok then...

Open the door, you potato...

So, what the fuck are you doing ?

Don't be afraid...

Hello Mister Dubrovsky,

I bring you a little present, from my brother...

Open it yourself..

All is fine here.. And you, what's new ?

We've got a little problem, we lost track of Benita...

Imbecile!

He has left his car, so he took the metro, and what with the crowd...

Useless fucking moron !

Above all, don�t lose Coubassi..

Or I will blow you all up !

I need to leave now, Mister Dubrovsky...

Before that, we are going on a little journey.

But I...

As long as you are with Uncle Dob, nobody will hurt you...

Take this... The backwards shooting gun.

Now it really works... - You gotta be kidding !

Take it anyway, it could be useful...

Beware, stay focused, it shoots backward !

Stand up! I say.. Stand up!

Despite all the misfortune we have endured,

we will do our duty till the end... The deal will be confirmed...

Too bad..

Hello Mister Benita ?

The whole little family is in the countryside with Uncle Dob...

And my brother ? - So is your brother...

What is it ?

Hello, I am from the insurance company, Le Phoenix.

We are already insured !

You need insurance, believe me you always need more insurance.

Get off.. - Come on and make me !

You get fucking off... I will show you !

Hey Manolo where the fuck are you ? Manolo!

Manolo ? I don't have anymore ammo..

Manolo!

Manolo...

Excuse me, I am in the Mister Dubrovsky country estate ?

Correct..

Here is Manolo...

As I don't like leaving tracks behind me,

and as fire purifies everything,

I am offering you a little festive fire, to celebrate my departure...

Don't you think we could call and get backup ?

No time...

I will try to get in through the first floor window..

Holy shit, they are numerous...

Not so much...

You alright?

Don't move anymore...

Stay still... Stay perfectly still.

Please do follow me..

Hello.. hello.. The deal is confirmed !

Sell off the stock before my coming !

All right boss... We sell off and go away...

Ladies first, we are gentlemen

and there will be room for everybody...

It would be to bad to separate lovers..

Especially for so long a journey...

You are right on time, Mister Coubassi

the spectacle is about to begin !

Imbecile! We're in a hurry !

Enough of this child's play !

I don't want any witness ! No witness ! No witness alive !

With the machine gun...

All of them with the machine gun !

Strange fate, my dear Rapi�re...

Come on, get your feathers off, and untie us...

Okay...

Don't shoot ! I've got better for him..

Don't shoot ! If anybody moves forward I blow him away !

Be careful don't move or I...

I'm going to shoot ! I'm going to shoot !

No you're not going to shoot...

You'll bet on that? You'll bet on that?

I'll bet on that..

He won...

I will never forget...

You alright? - Sure, I�m alright...