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Original subtitles

>> Announcer: TONIGHT ON "LATE NIGHT WITH SETH MEYERS."

SENATOR KAMALA HARRIS. HEAD COACH OF THE SEATTLE

SEAHAWKS, PETE CARROLL AN ALL NEW "CLOSER LOOK.

FEATURING THE 8G BAND WITH FRED ARMISEN

AND NOW SETH MEYERS. >> Seth: WELCOME TO "LATE NIGHT"

EVERYONE I HOPE YOU ALL HAD A GOOD

WEEKEND, AND I REALLY HOPE THAT WAS THE WEEKEND.

THERE IS JUST NO WAY TO KNOW LET'S GET TO THE NEWS.

PRESIDENT TRUMP ANNOUNCED YESTERDAY HE WILL NOT BE ABLE TO

THROW OUT THE CEREMONIAL FIRST PITCH AT A NEW YORK YANKEES GAME

NEXT MONTH BECAUSE OF HIS, QUOTE, "STRONG FOCUS ON THE

CHINA VIRUS, INCLUDING SCHEDULED MEETINGS ON VACCINES, OUR

ECONOMY AND MUCH ELSE. HE THEN RAN THE TWEET BY HIS

PROOFREADER, BRETT FAVRE "LOOKS GOOD!

LET'S HIT THE BACK NINE. PRESIDENT TRUMP MOCKED JOE BIDEN

ON TWITTER YESTERDAY AFTER THE FORMER VICE PRESIDENT MISTAKENLY

REFERRED TO ARIZONA AS A CITY, WHEN EVERYONE KNOWS IT'S TWO

CITIES EVERYTHING ELSE IS REST STOPS.

THAT JOKE WAS WRITTEN BY ARIZONA'S OWN ALEX BAYS.

PRESIDENT TRUMP TOURED AN INNOVATION CENTER IN

NORTH CAROLINA TODAY SAID EMPLOYEES, "SIR, WE HAVE SO

MUCH MORE TO SHOW YOU THAN THE DOOR."

"THIS IS INCREDIBLE. IT OPENS LIKE MA ‐‐ I AM NOT

TOUCHING ANYTHING. NO BUTTON, NO HANDLE

IT KNOWS I'M HERE. AND IN AN INTERVIEW YESTERDAY,

HOUSE SPEAKER NANCY PELOSI CRITICIZED PRESIDENT TRUMP'S

HANDLING OF THE CORONAVIRUS PANDEMIC AND CALLED HIM MR

MAKE MATTERS WORSE SO I GUESS I HAVE TO COME UP

WITH A NEW NICKNAME FOR MY PENIS.

WHAT THE KIDS ARE HERE?

THEY REALLY ‐‐ THEY REALLY SHOULDN'T BE WITHIN EARSHOT FOR

THE MONOLOGUE. IT'S A LATE NIGHT SHOW, SO

THAT'S RIGHT, MR. MAKE MATTERS WORSE.

THAT IS A TERRIBLE NICKNAME. SOUNDS LIKE THE NAME OF A

TAYLOR SWIFT SONG THAT WASN'T GOOD ENOUGH TO MAKE THE ALBUM.

AND YOU KNOW WHAT YOU CALL A TAYLOR SWIFT SONG THAT ISN'T

GOOD ENOUGH TO MAKE THE ALBUM? PROBABLY AN EXCELLENT, EXCELLENT

SONG WASHINGTON'S NFL TEAM ANNOUNCED

LAST WEEK THEY WILL BE CALLED THE WASHINGTON FOOTBALL TEAM

UNTIL A PERMANENT NAME IS CHOSEN

THEY ALSO INTRODUCED THEIR NEW MASCOT ‐‐ MASCOT

THAT'S RIGHT WASHINGTON'S NFL TEAM WILL NOW

BE CALLED THE WASHINGTON FOOTBALL TEAM, AND I WOULD MAKE

FUN OF THEIR LACK OF ORIGINALITY BUT, YOU KNOW, I'M NOT REALLY

ONE TO JUDGE NORTH KOREAN OFFICIALS HAVE

REPORTEDLY PUT A CITY ON LOCKDOWN AFTER THE FIRST

POSSIBLE CORONAVIRUS CASE IN THE COUNTRY.

WHAT A SHAME FOR RESIDENTS WHO CAN NO LONGER ENJOY THE TYPICAL

FREEDOMS OF LIVING IN NORTH KOREA.

DURING AN INTERVIEW LAST WEEK, PRESIDENT TRUMP REMINISCED ABOUT

HIS LIFE BEFORE BECOMING PRESIDENT AND BRAGGED THAT HE

WAS, QUOTE, "IN SO MANY RAP SONGS, LIKE 79 OR SOMETHING,"

ADDING, "AT LEAST, I ASSUME 'JUICY' WAS ABOUT ME."

"OF COURSE, YOU SHOULD KNOW THAT I NEVER UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES

ATE SARDINES FOR DINNER. AND IF YOU DON'T KNOW, NOW YOU

KNOW." FOX SPORTS ANNOUNCED LAST WEEK

THAT IT WILL ADD A VIRTUAL CROWD TO BASEBALL GAMES AND WILL

INCLUDE ANIMATED FANS. THAT'S RIGHT

IT WILL FEATURE EVERY TYPE OF MLB FAN, INCLUDING BORED MAN,

BORED WOMAN, GUY WHO MISSES EVERY PLAY BECAUSE HE'S ON HIS

PHONE, KID WHO'S ONLY GOING TO CATCH A BALL IF AN ADULT FEELS

BAD AND GIVES HER THE ONE THEY JUST CAUGHT, AND, OF COURSE, MAN

CLEARLY CHEATING ON HIS WIFE TODAY WAS BAGPIPE APPRECIATION

DAY, AND I HATE TO BREAK IT TO YOU, PAL, BUT I THINK THEY ARE

CLAPPING BECAUSE IT'S OVER ANYWAY, APPRECIATE YOU

A COUPLE IN MINNESOTA WERE KICKED OUT OF A WALMART OVER THE

WEEKEND FOR WEARING A FACEMASK WITH NAZI SYMBOLS.

MAN, WHERE DO YOU GO WHEN YOU GET KICKED OUT OF WALMART?

THAT'S LIKE AUDITIONING FOR A PORNO AND NOT GETTING THE PART

AND FINALLY, CHEEZ‐ITS HAS ANNOUNCED A NEW PARTNERSHIP WITH

A WINERY TO OFFER A COMBINED BOX OF WINE AND CHEEZ‐ITS.

NOW ALL YOU NEED TO FIND IS SOMEONE TO BREAK UP WITH YOU

HONEY, YOU CAN LET THE KIDS BACK IN

THE MONOLOGUE IS OVER. I WOULD SAY IT WAS FINE.

IT WAS A FINE ONE. WE GOT A GREAT SHOW FOR YOU

TONIGHT. I WILL BE TALKING TO SENATOR

KAMALA HARRIS, PLUS THE HEAD

COACH OF THE SEATTLE SEAHAWKS, PETE CARROLL, WILL BE HERE BUT FIRST, "A CLOSER LOOK.

>> Seth: HELLO, AND WELCOME BACK TO THE CAPTAIN'S QUARTERS.

IT'S MONDAY, WHICH MEANS MY HAIR HAS HAD ANOTHER WEEKEND TO GROW,

AND WHILE I AM AIMING FOR THE STEFF, JAMES SPADER'S ICONIC

HAIRCUT FROM "PRETTY IN PINK," I MIGHT BE BACKING INTO

JAMES VAN DER BEEK'S 'DO FROM "DAWSON'S CREEK.

NOW, I'VE NEVER SEEN "DAWSON'S CREEK.

I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW IT WAS A TV SHOW

I JUST ASSUMED IT WAS A MEME THAT BEST EXEMPLIFIES HOW I FEEL

ALL THE TIME BUT MY WIFE IS A "CREEK" FREAK

WHO IS CURRENTLY REWATCHING IT ON HER PHONE EVERY NIGHT IN BED,

AND I HAVE ONE BIG OBSERVATION BASED ON MY INTRODUCTION TO THE

SHOW THE OTHER CHARACTERS SAY

"DAWSON" A LOT LIKE EVEN WHEN IT'S A TWO PERSON

SCENE, THEY START EVERY SENTENCE WITH "DAWSON," AND, LOOK, JOEY,

JEN, I AM NOT TELLING YOU HOW TO LIVE YOUR LIFE, BUT HE KNOWS

YOU'RE TALKING TO HIM. THERE IS NO ONE ELSE IN THE

ROOM ALSO JEN, EVERYONE KNOWS YOU

USED TO LIVE IN NEW YORK CITY. LET IT GO.

DID YOU WATCH "DAWSON'S CREEK," SEA CAPTAIN?

>> I'M TEAM PACEY. >> Seth: OF COURSE YOU ARE

NOW WHERE WERE WE? OH, RIGHT, THE REAL WORLD.

AS THE CORONAVIRUS PANDEMIC CONTINUES TO SPIRAL OUT OF

CONTROL, A MORALLY AND INTELLECTUALLY BANKRUPT

REPUBLICAN PARTY IS SQUABBLING OVER CUTTING UNEMPLOYMENT

BENEFITS FOR OUT‐OF‐WORK AMERICANS WHILE SENDING SECRET

POLICE TO AMERICAN CITIES AND WHINING ABOUT CARTOONS

FOR MORE ON THIS, IT'S TIME FOR "A CLOSER LOOK."

AND I AM GLAD IT'S TIME BECAUSE ‐‐ ♪ I DON'T WANNA WAIT ♪

♪ >> Seth: WE'RE LESS THAN

100 DAYS AWAY FROM THE PRESIDENTIAL

ELECTION AND MORE AMERICANS NOW SAY THAT THE COUNTRY IS ON THE

WRONG TRACK THAN AT ANY POINT IN DONALD TRUMP'S PRESIDENCY.

WE HAVE GOT AN OUT‐OF‐CONTROL PANDEMIC, THE WORST UNEMPLOYMENT

IN NEARLY A CENTURY, AN EPIDEMIC OF RACIST POLICE BRUTALITY, AND

A LOOMING EVICTION CRISIS. BUT DON'T WORRY.

THE TRUMP ADMINISTRATION WILL PROTECT YOUR CARTOONS AND YOUR TOYS

>> HE IS ALSO APPALLED BY CANCEL CULTURE, AND CANCEL CULTURE

SPECIFICALLY AS IT PERTAINS TO COPS

WE SAW A FEW WEEKS AGO THAT "PAW PATROL," A CARTOON SHOW ABOUT

COPS WAS CANCELED, THE SHOW "COPS" WAS CANCELED, "LIVE PD"

WAS CANCELED LEGO HALTED THE SALES OF THEIR

LEGO CITY POLICE STATION >> Seth: "PAW PATROL" AND LEGOS

MAKE SENSE, I GUESS, COMING FROM A GUY WHO LOVES ROCKETS, TRUCKS

AND MR. POTATO DEAD. ANYWAY, I GUESS WE KNOW NOW WHAT

TRUMP DOES WITH ALL THAT FREE TIME ON HIS SCHEDULE

I DON'T LIKE THIS RECYCLING PUP, ROCKY.

I THINK HE'S PART OF THE DEEP STATE.

KAYLEIGH KAYLEIGH, SEND THE SECRET POLICE

TO ADVENTURE BAY AND GET ME SOME MORE LEGOS,

KAYLEIGH I STUCK ONE UP MY NOSE TO STOP

THE CORONAVIRUS. FAUCI, BY THE WAY, DID YOU GET

MY EMAIL ABOUT LEGOS UP THE NOSE MAYBE STOPPING THE VIRUS

OKAY I LOVE YOUR THOUGHTS ON THAT

YOU ARE MY BEST FRIEND, FAUCI. YOU KNOW WHAT I CALL US?

TURNER AND FAUCH I AM GOING TO MAKE T‐SHIRTS.

ANYWAY, THIS IS WHERE THE TRUMP ADMINISTRATION AND THE

REPUBLICAN PARTY ARE AT, WHINING ABOUT CARTOONS AND LEGOS WHILE

SENDING SECRET POLICE TO GAS MOMS AND VETS AND ARGUING THAT

SLAVERY WAS A, QUOTE, "NECESSARY EVIL."

A SITTING UNITED STATES SENATOR SAID THAT.

AT LEAST I THINK TOM COTTON IS A SENATOR.

HE LOOKS LIKE THE CONFEDERATE SLENDER MAN.

SERIOUSLY, THESE GUYS JUST KEEP COMING UP WITH WINNERS

I MEAN, WHAT'S NEXT? IS TRUMP GOING TO SAY SOMETHING

NICE ABOUT AN ALLEGED SEX TRAFFICKER AND PREDATOR WHO WAS

ARRESTED BY THE FBI AT A REMOTE ‐

OH, YEAH, YEAH OH, RIGHT.

THEY REALLY THINK AMERICANS CARE ABOUT "PAW PATROL" AND LEGOS

I GUESS THEY FIGURE IF YOU ARE OUT OF WORK AND QUARANTINING AT

HOME TO AVOID THE DEADLY VIRUS THEY FAILED TO STOP, YOU'LL NEED

SOMETHING TO KEEP YOU ENTERTAINED.

PRESIDENT TRUMP IS WORKING HARD TO MAKE SURE THAT OUT‐OF‐WORK

AMERICANS WHO LOST THEIR HEALTH INSURANCE AND ARE FACING

EVICTION HAVE CARTOONS AND LEGOS TO KEEP THEM OCCUPIED.

AND IN LIEU OF THE $600 UNEMPLOYMENT BENEFIT, WE

WILL BE SENDING EVERY AMERICAN SOME PLAY‐DOH AND AN OUT‐OF‐WORK

TAMAGOTCHI AND I'M SORRY?

THE TAMAGOTCHI HAS DIED FROM THE CORONAVIRUS.

THE CRAZIEST PART OF THIS THOUGH IS THAT SHE'S WRONG.

NEITHER "PAW PATROL" NOR THE LEGO CITY POLICE STATION HAVE

BEEN CANCELED. IN FACT, "PAW PATROL" ACTUALLY

HAD TO TWEET A CLARIFICATION SAYING, "NO NEED TO WORRY.

'PAW PATROL' IS NOT CANCELED." AND THAT'S GREAT

BUT, YOU KNOW, THEY COULD ALSO STAND TO BE DEFUNDED A LITTLE.

I MEAN, THAT'S AN AWFUL LOT OF TACTICAL GEAR FOR A TOWN WHERE

THE WORST THING THAT EVER HAPPENS IS A MISSING CHICKEN

SO THE TRUMP ADMINISTRATION GOT FACT‐CHECKED BY A CHILDREN'S

CARTOON. AND AT THIS POINT, IT'S NOT LONG

BEFORE ARTHUR SHOWS UP TO A PROTEST WITH A SIGN THAT SAYS

"[ BLEEP ] TRUMP.

>> SETH, THAT REMINDS ME, WHAT'S A SEA CAPTAIN'S FAVORITE ANIMAL?

>> Seth: OH, I DON'T KNOW, WHAT IS A SEA CAPTAIN'S FAVORITE

ANIMAL >> AN ARRRR‐DVARK!

>> Seth: SEA CAPTAIN >> HA, HA, HA!

SORRY. >> Seth: SO WHAT WAS I TALKING

ABOUT? OH, RIGHT.

CHILDREN'S CARTOONS. THE POINT IS THIS IS WHAT YOUR

GOVERNMENT WAS TALKING ABOUT AS A FEDERAL MORATORIUM ON

EVICTIONS AND A $600 UNEMPLOYMENT BENEFIT

KEEPING MILLIONS OF AMERICANS AFLOAT BOTH EXPIRED.

AND RATHER THAN RUSHING WITH EXTREME URGENCY TO EXTEND BOTH

PROGRAMS, OR, HEAVEN FORBID, MAKE THEM PERMANENT, REPUBLICANS

CHOSE INSTEAD TO DAWDLE AS THEY BICKERED OVER WAYS TO MAKE THE

UNEMPLOYMENT PROGRAM BOTH LESS GENEROUS AND MORE COMPLICATED.

MITCH McCONNELL SAID A NEW STIMULUS DEAL COULD TAKE A FEW

WEEKS. WHY?

JUST EXTEND IT NOW JOBLESS CLAIMS WENT UP FOR THE

FIRST TIME SINCE MARCH, FOUR MILLION AMERICANS WHO DO HAVE

JOBS HAVE SEEN A PAY CUT, 12 MILLION ARE FACING EVICTION

AS THE MORATORIUM EXPIRES. IN OKLAHOMA, MORE THAN 60% OF

UNEMPLOYMENT APPLICATIONS HAVEN'T EVEN BEEN PROCESSED,

WITH HUNDREDS OF PEOPLE SLEEPING IN THEIR CARS OR CAMPING OUTSIDE

OKLAHOMA'S UNEMPLOYMENT OFFICES. AND IN OHIO, THE CITY OF

COLUMBUS HAS TURNED PART OF ITS CONVENTION CENTER INTO AN

EVICTIONS COURT. WELL, YOU GOT TO GIVE IT TO

TRUMP, HE FINALLY FILLED AN ARENA.

OH, AND ON TOP OF THAT, NURSES ARE WEARING GOWNS WITHOUT

OPENINGS FOR HANDS AND SECRET POLICE ARE MARCHING THROUGH THE

STREETS OF PORTLAND TEAR GASSING

VETS AND MOMS WHILE PROTESTERS PLAY THE IMPERIAL MARCH FROM "STAR WARS."

♪ >> Seth: THAT'S A PRETTY GREAT

TROLL. OF COURSE, IF GEORGE LUCAS WAS

INVOLVED, HE WOULD PROBABLY ADD IN SOME UNNECESSARY CGI AND

GRATUITOUS POD RACE. SO WHAT WAS THE PRESIDENT DOING

WHILE THE NATION WAS CRUMBLING YOU GUESSED IT

HE WAS PLAYING GOLF AND SMILING FOR PHOTOS WITH BRETT FAVRE.

CHEESEHEADS ALWAYS LOVED FAVRE, SO IT MAKES SENSE THAT OL'

CHEESE BRAIN WOULD, TOO. ALSO, WHAT'S GOING ON HERE, MAN?

HE LOOKS LIKE HE JUST CRAWLED OUT OF A VAT AT ACE CHEMICALS.

THIS IS HOW A DOG SMILES WHEN THEY HAVE THEIR HEAD OUT THE

WINDOW THAT'S THE FACE YOU MAKE WHEN

YOU ARE TRYING TO HOLD IN A FART AT A FUNERAL

NOT THAT I THINK TRUMP WOULD BOTHER TRYING TO HOLD IT IN.

"WHOA, WHOO! WELL, BOY, IF THAT DOESN'T WAKE

HIM UP, HE IS DEFINITELY DEAD. ALTHOUGH IN FAIRNESS, IT'S

PROBABLY BETTER WHEN TRUMP IS GOLFING BECAUSE THEN HE IS TOO

BUSY TO WHINE ABOUT CARTOONS AND LEGOS AND STATUES.

THIS BOTTOM‐OF‐THE‐BARREL CULTURE WAR BULL[ BLEEP ] IS THE

RESULT OF A POLITICAL MOVEMENT THAT IS INTELLECTUALLY BARREN

AND MORALLY BANKRUPT THEY HAVE NOTHING TO RUN ON, NO

POLICIES TO CHAMPION, NO ACHIEVEMENTS TO TOUT

SO THEY THINK THEY CAN GET VOTERS TO CARE ABOUT STATUES AND

CARTOONS IT'S ALL THEY HAVE LEFT, AND

THAT'S BECAUSE AMERICANS KNOW TRUMP HAS FAILED

IT'S CLEAR IN POLL AFTER POLL. ALL YOU HAVE DO IS LOOK AT ONE

OF THE DOZENS OF OTHER LARGE DEVELOPED COUNTRIES THAT HAVE

SUCCESSFULLY SUPPRESSED THEIR OUTBREAKS WHILE KEEPING THEIR

ECONOMIES LARGELY INTACT SOUTH KOREA HAD THEIR FIRST CASE

ON THE SAME DAY AS OURS AND RAPIDLY CONTAINED THEIR

OUTBREAK THE ENTIRETY OF THE EU WITH A

MUCH LARGER POPULATION HAS AN AVERAGE OF JUST 81 DEATHS PER

DAY WHILE WE ARE AT 1,000. AMERICANS CAN'T EVEN GO TO

CANADA OR EUROPE, WHICH MEANS FOR THE FIRST TIME THIS CENTURY,

NO ONE WILL TAKE A PICTURE TRYING TO MAKE IT LOOK LIKE THEY

ARE HOLDING UP THE LEANING TOWER OF PISA.

AMERICANS CAN PLAINLY SEE THAT THINGS ARE NOT JUST BAD, BUT

GETTING WORSE WHILE THE REST OF THE WORLD WATCHES US WITH A

COMBINATION OF PITY AND HORROR AND PROBABLY A LITTLE LESS

SURPRISE THAN WE THINK "IT IS SO SAD WHAT IS HAPPENING

TO YOUR COUNTRY. "I KNOW, IT'S SHOCKING, RIGHT?

"YEAH, SHOCKING? I WOULD NOT USE THIS WORD.

IT IS ‐‐ HOW DO YOU SAY? TO BE EXPECTED."

WE'VE SEEN OUR OUTBREAK SPIRAL OUT OF CONTROL IN A WAY THAT'S

EVEN WORSE THAN THE INITIAL PEAK IN APRIL

THE WHITE HOUSE NATIONAL SECURITY ADVISOR JUST TESTED

POSITIVE MAJOR LEAGUE BASEBALL HAS AN

OUTBREAK JUST DAYS AFTER STARTING ITS SEASON.

WE ARE NEARING A NATIONAL PEAK IN HOSPITALIZATIONS.

WE RECORDED 1,000 NEW DEATHS A DAY FOR FOUR STRAIGHT DAYS

AND LABS ACROSS THE COUNTRY ARE ONCE AGAIN FACING LONG DELAYS IN

TESTING THANKS TO SUPPLY SHORTAGES.

OR, AS ONE PUBLIC HEALTH OFFICIAL PUT IT, "IT'S LIKE

'GROUNDHOG DAY.' I FEEL LIKE I've LIVED THIS DAY

FOUR OR FIVE MONTHS AGO. EXCEPT IN "GROUNDHOG DAY,"

BILL MURRAY LEARNED TO PLAY THE PIANO AND BECAME A BETTER

PERSON ALL I'VE LEARNED IS THAT DOING A

LATE NIGHT SHOW IN YOUR ATTIC IS KIND OF LIKE MAKING A VIDEO

WILL, EXCEPT I AM NOT OF SOUND MIND

>> SURE YOU ARE. >> Seth: THANK YOU, TALKING YARD

SALE PAINTING. QUARANTINE HAS LASTED SO LONG,

I'VE COME FULL CIRCLE AND STARTED WATCHING "TIGER KING"

AGAIN. GOI MEANA GIVE JOE EXOTIC ONE

MORE CHANCE TO CONVINCE ME I AM WRONG.

IF YOU ASK ME WHAT DAY IT IS RIGHT NOW, I WOULD SAY

JANUAUGUSTOBER 67TH. THE ONLY CONCRETE DAY I CAN

PICTURE IS THE FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL, AND I'M TERRIFIED IT'S

NOT GOING TO HAPPEN BECAUSE INSTEAD OF MAKING A PLAN ON HOW

TO GET KIDS AND TEACHERS BACK SAFELY, WE PRIORITIZED OPENING A

CRUNCH FITNESS IN GAINESVILLE. I HOPE YOU FELLOWS GOT SWOLE

ENOUGH TO MAKE UP FOR THE FACT THAT MY KIDS CAN'T COUNT PAST

SEVEN. SERIOUSLY, WE SHOULD HAVE HAD

TESTING FIGURED OUT MONTHS AGO THAT WAS THE WHOLE POINT OF

FLATTENING THE CURVE, TO BUY TIME FOR OUR POLICYMAKERS TO GET

A SYSTEM OF TESTING, TRACING AND ISOLATION IN PLACE SO WE COULD

CONTAIN FUTURE OUTBREAKS REMEMBER THAT?

WHEN WE ALL KEPT SAYING "FLATTEN THE CURVE"

BACK WHEN DR. FAUCI WAS THE ONE BRIEFING THE NATION AT PRESS

CONFERENCES INSTEAD OF CHUCKING A BALL LIKE YOUR GRANDPA USED

TO "I'LL GO GET IT, GRANDPA."

"LOOK BOTH WAYS WHEN YOU CROSS THE STREET."

AND YET, THE PRESIDENT AND THE GOP HAVE SHOWN ZERO INTEREST IN

FIXING THE PROBLEM IN FACT, TRUMP IS SO DEEPLY

INVESTED IN HIS OWN POLITICAL FORTUNES AND SO PROFOUNDLY

DETACHED FROM REALITY, THAT HE STILL THINKS IT WOULD BE BETTER

IF WE STOP TESTING ALTOGETHER

AND JUST LET THE VIRUS RIP THROUGH THE COUNTRY SICKENING PEOPLE UNDETECTED.

>> I PERSONALLY THINK IT'S OVERRATED, BUT I AM TOTALLY

WILLING TO KEEP DOING IT I AM OKAY WITH IT IF THEY WANT

TO DO IT, BUT AGAIN, IT MAKES US LOOK BAD

BUT THINK OF IT. IF INSTEAD OF 50 MILLION WE DID

25 MILLION, WE DON'T HAVE THE NUMBER OF CASES.

THE CASES WOULD BE DOWN. HERE WOULD BE THE NORMALLY

HEADLINE NOT FOR ME IT WOULDN'T BE.

BUT FOR ANYBODY ELSE, THEY'D SAY "CASES CUT IN HALF."

>> Seth: FOR THE MILLIONTH TIME, THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS.

THE HEADLINE WOULDN'T BE "CASES CUT IN HALF.

AT BEST, IT WOULD BE SOMETHING LIKE, "CASES CUT IN HALF BUT

EVERYONE MYSTERIOUSLY COUGHING FOR SOME REASON.

SECOND, IT DOESN'T JUST MAKE YOU LOOK BAD

IT IS BAD. THE CASES ARE THERE MAKING

PEOPLE SICK IN THE REAL WORLD WHETHER YOU TEST FOR THEM OR

NOT. JUST BECAUSE YOU REFUSE TO GO TO

THE DENTIST DOESN'T MEAN YOU DON'T HAVE CAVITIES.

ALL WE HAVE TO DO IS LOOK AT YOUR FACE TO KNOW YOU JUST TOOK

A SWIG OF ICE WATER WITH A MOUTH FULL OF ROTTEN TEETH

AND YOU CAN JUST SENSE THEIR DESPERATION AS THEY GRASP WILDLY

FOR ARGUMENTS EVEN THEY MUST KNOW ARE ABSURD.

TAKE FOR EXAMPLE WHITE HOUSE SENIOR POLICY ADVISOR AND

EDGAR ALLAN POE VILLAIN STEPHEN MILLER

[ THUNDER [ WITCH CACKLING ]

>> ARRGH, BE GONE, FOUL SEA SERPENT.

TO THE LAST, I GRAPPLE WITH THEE

FROM HELL'S HEART, I STAB AT THEE

FOR HEAT'S SAKE, I SPIT MY LAST BREATH AT THEE

>> Seth: SEA CAPTAIN, WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT AHAB REFERENCES?

>> AH, WELL, YOU SAID DON'T BE A MOBY DICK.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING, SETH >> Seth: I AM WAITING FOR

EVERYBODY TO FINISH LAUGHING >> HA‐HA, OKAY

>> Seth: AS A RAGING PANDEMIC SPIRALED OUT OF CONTROL, MILLER

WENT ON HUMAN MONEY CLIP TUCKER CARLSON'S SHOW AND

COMPARED THE PEOPLE PULLING DOWN CONFEDERATE STATUES TO CONFEDERATES

>> THE DEMOCRATIC PARTY FOR A LONG TIME, HISTORICALLY, HAS

BEEN THE PARTY OF SECESSION. WHAT YOU ARE SEEING TODAY IS THE

DEMOCRATIC PARTY RETURNING TO ITS ROOTS.

THESE ARE MAYORS AND GOVERNORS THAT ARE SAYING THE FEDERAL LAW,

THE U. S. CONSTITUTION, DOESN'T APPLY WITHIN THE CONFINES OF OUR

CITY AND OUR CITIZENS WHO WILL BE

HELD AT THE MERCY OF THE MOB AND THE ADMINISTRATION OF

JUSTICE, THE FEDERAL COURTHOUSE, WILL BE ALLOWED TO FALL UNDER

SIEGE. AND THAT'S WHAT'S HAPPENING

RIGHT NOW IN PORTLAND. >> Seth: SO I GUESS THAT MEANS

STEPHEN MILLER WANTS TO BUILD STATUES TO DEMOCRATIC

POLITICIANS? COOL, WHERE DO YOU WANT THE

JOE BIDEN STATUE HOW ABOUT ON THE ACELA OR MAYBE

ON THE DEBATE STAGE WITH TRUMP IT PROBABLY WOULDN'T MAKE MUCH

OF A DIFFERENCE. SINCE I'M PRETTY SURE BIDEN'S

APPROACH TO THE DEBATES IS KNOWN IN ORATORICAL CIRCLES AS THE

STATUE STRATEGY. JUST STAND AS STILL AS POSSIBLE

AND LET TRUMP SAY A BUNCH OF CRAZY THINGS AND MELT DOWN ON

HIS OWN. "THEY WANT TO TAKE AWAY YOUR

LEGOS, YOUR 'PAW PATROL,' YOUR BEANIE BABIES, YOUR 'YO GABBA

GABBA! BUT WE'RE NOT GOING TO LET THAT

HAPPEN, FOLKS. YOU CAN TRUST YOUR VERY NORMAL

PRESIDENT. SERIOUSLY, YOU ARE CALLING

DEMOCRATS SECESSIONISTS? YOU GUYS ARE THE ONES PROTECTING

THE MONUMENTS OF ACTUAL SECESSIONISTS.

DO THEY NOT TEACH HISTORY AT YOUR GRAVE ROBBING SCHOOL?

THE CONFEDERATES YOU'RE DEFENDING WERE RACIST SLAVERS

AND TRADERS. YOU SHOULD KNOW ALL THAT

SINCE YOU WERE ALIVE FOR IT, I'M PRETTY SURE WHEN LEE SURRENDERED

TO GRANT AT APPOMATTOX, MILLER WAS THERE POPPING OUT OF HIS

COFFIN THE GOP IS TOTALLY AND

COMPLETELY BANKRUPT, BOTH MORALLY AND INTELLECTUALLY, AND

WITH LESS THAN 100 DAYS BEFORE THE ELECTION, THEY'RE DESPERATE.

150,000 AMERICANS HAVE DIED, JOBLESS CLAIMS ARE UP AGAIN, AN

UNEMPLOYMENT LIFELINE AND EVICTION MORATORIUM HAVE EXPIRED

AND THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT CARTOONS

NOT ONLY IS THE COUNTRY IN DIRE STRAITS, BUT ALL OF THIS ‐

>> MAKES US LOOK BAD >> Seth: THIS HAS BEEN "A CLOSER

LOOK." >> DOZEN

♪ >> Seth: SO MANY NEW YORKERS ARE

TURNING TO CITY HARVEST FOR HELPING FEEDING THEIR FAMILIES,

AND THEY NEED YOUR SUPPORT NOW MORE THAN EVER

THERE IS A WEBSITE BELOW TO DONATE

WE WILL BE RIGHT BACK WITH SENATOR KAMALA HARRIS.

♪ >> Announcer: FOR MORE OF SETH'S

"CLOSER LOOKS," BE SURE TO SUBSCRIBE TO "LATE NIGHT" ON

YOUTUB

>> Seth: WE ARE VERY EXCITED OUR

GOOD FRIEND FRED ARMISEN IS BACK LEADING THE 8G BAND THIS WEEK.

I KNOW IT'S LATE AT NIGHT. BUT IF YOU COULD APPLAUD VERY

LOUDLY, IT WOULD MEAN SO MUCH TO HIM.

THANK YOU. OUR FIRST GUEST IS A

UNITED STATES SENATOR FROM

CALIFORNIA HERE IS MY CONVERSATION WITH SENATOR KAMALA HARRIS.

TO THE SHOW

HOW ARE YOU? >> IT'S GREAT TO BE BACK WITH

YOU, SETH. I, YOU KNOW, ALL THINGS

CONSIDERED, I'M WELL YOU KNOW, WHEN ONE IN FIVE

MOTHERS IN AMERICA IS DESCRIBING HER CHILDREN UNDER THE AGE OF

12 AS BEING HUNGRY, I'M GREAT. >> Seth: I FEEL THE SAME WAY

WHEN YOU PUT IT IN PERSPECTIVE I WILL SAY IT'S A LITTLE

STRANGE. THIS IS THE SECOND TIME YOU HAVE

BEEN ON THE SHOW SINCE WE HAVE LEFT THE STUDIO.

ONCE I TALKED TO YOU FROM MY ATTIC AND NOW I JOIN YOU FROM MY

IN‐LAWS' HOUSE AND I WANT TO SAY IT SEEMS AS

THOUGH YOUR COLLEAGUES IN THE CAPITOL ARE GETTING BETTER ABOUT

WEARING MASKS. >> YES

>> Seth: BUT DO YOU STILL TRY TO AVOID THEM AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE

GIVEN THE OPPORTUNITY? NOW THAT YOU HAVE A GOOD REASON

TO AVOID THEM? >> I WILL TELL YOU THAT I AM

STILL VERY VIGILANT ABOUT WEARING ‐‐ I AM NOW ACTUALLY, I

STARTED TO SOMETIMES WEAR DOUBLE MASKS.

[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] >> Seth: MM‐HM

>> LIKE, THE MEDICAL ONE, YOU KNOW, THE BLUE ONE, AND THEN,

YOU KNOW, WHATEVER THE CLOTH ONE IS OVER.

YEAH, THEY ARE WEARING ‐‐ SINCE THE PRESIDENT STARTED WEARING A

MASK, I'VE NOTICED MANY MORE PEOPLE ARE WEARING MASKS

SO, THAT'S INTERESTING, ISN'T IT

>> Seth: WELL, YOU KNOW, IT'S MORE SAD THAN INTERESTING

BECAUSE, YOU KNOW, PRESIDENT ‐‐ NO MATTER WHO THE PRESIDENT IS,

IT'S A REMINDER THAT THEY CAN SET A GOOD EXAMPLE AND IT'S A

SHAME IT TOOK THIS LONG. BUT I THINK WHAT EVERYBODY WAS

SAYING IS WHEN THE PERSON WHO IS IN CHARGE DOES THE RIGHT THING,

IT'S AMAZING HOW MANY PEOPLE WILL FOLLOW THAT LEAD.

>> RIGHT AND YOU ARE EXACTLY RIGHT.

I MEAN, THAT IS THE POWER OF LEADERSHIP, RIGHT?

AND IT IS ‐‐ IT IS INCUMBENT ON A PERSON WHO HAS BEEN ELECTED A

LEADER TO ACTUALLY UNDERSTAND THE RESPONSIBILITIES OF

LEADERSHIP AND, OF COURSE, DONALD TRUMP

DOES NOT UNDERSTAND THE RESPONSIBILITIES OF LEADERSHIP

A REAL LEADER UNDERSTANDS THAT THEIR STRENGTH IS IN HOW THEY

LIFT PEOPLE UP AND NOT HOW THEY BEAT PEOPLE DOWN, AND THAT IS

SOMETHING DONALD TRUMP HAS NEVER SEEMED TO UNDERSTAND SINCE HE

TOOK OFFICE. SO THAT'S WHY I'M VOTING FOR JOE

BIDEN. >> Seth: SOMEONE WHO I WOULD

IMAGINE YOU BELIEVED DID UNDERSTAND LEADERSHIP, WAS YOUR

COLLEAGUE JOHN LEWIS I KNOW HE IS LYING IN STATE NOW

AT THE CAPITOL CAN YOU SPEAK ABOUT THE EXAMPLE

HE SET AND YOUR HISTORY WITH HIM?

>> YEAH. I, UM ‐‐ I REMEMBER HAVING MANY

CONVERSATIONS WITH HIM, BUT ONE IN PARTICULAR IN HIS OFFICE,

WHICH WAS LIKE A CIVIL RIGHTS MUSEUM BECAUSE HE HAS JUST LIVED

A FULL LIFE OF SERVICE, RIGHT? AND FROM THE TIME THAT HE WAS A

STUDENT AND A YOUNG MAN THROUGH JUST, YOU KNOW, DAYS AGO

AND HE WAS AN AMERICAN HERO TO BE SURE, BUT ONE OF THE KINDEST

PEOPLE THAT YOU COULD MEET I MEAN, SETH, YOU KNOW, THE TYPE

OF PERSON WHO UNDERSTANDS, AGAIN, THAT THERE IS STRENGTH,

THEIR POWER ‐‐ BECAUSE HE WAS A VERY POWERFUL MAN.

BUT IT WASN'T THAT HE DEMANDED OR CARRIED POWER

HE JUST WAS POWER. HE HAD POWERFUL WORDS.

HE HAD A POWER THAT WAS BORN OUT OF A LOVE OF OUR COUNTRY, A

KINDNESS, AND THAT GAVE HIM POWER, AND I AM GOING TO MISS

HIM SO AND, YOU KNOW, ONE OF THE THINGS

THAT I DON'T THINK HAS COME OUT AS MUCH ABOUT HIM, BUT I WANT TO

MAKE A POINT OF MENTIONING IT, HE WAS VERY ENCOURAGING OF

WOMEN, AND WOMEN IN THE PROFESSIONS AND WOMEN IN

LEADERSHIP AND SO YOU CAN, YOU KNOW, THE

STORIES OF DIANE NASH OR EVEN THE STORIES THAT HE WOULD TELL

ABOUT THE OTHER WOMEN OF THE MOVEMENT THAT INSPIRED HIM,

INCLUDING ROSA PARKS, WAS ONE OF THE FIRST PEOPLE IN THE MOVEMENT

WHO INSPIRED HIM AND I'M GOING TO MISS HIM

GREATLY. AND I GUESS IN A SHORT WAY OF

SAYING IT, IT'S THIS JOHN LEWIS WAS ABOUT NOT ONLY

WALKING ACROSS THE EDMUND PETTUS BRIDGE FOR THE

SAKE OF VOTING RIGHTS AND THE FIGHT FOR EQUALITY IN AMERICA.

HE WAS ABOUT BUILDING BRIDGES. HE WASN'T ABOUT BUILDING WALLS

HE WAS ABOUT BUILDING BRIDGES. HE UNDERSTOOD THE CONNECTION

BETWEEN PEOPLE, AND HE WAS A CONNECTER.

HE CONNECTED THE FIGHT FROM THE CIVIL RIGHTS MOVEMENT IN THE

'50s AND '60s TO WHAT HE DID STANDING IN THE FRONT OF THE

LINE TALKING ABOUT WHAT WE NEED TO DO AROUND IMMIGRANTS' RIGHTS,

THAT IT'S A CIVIL RIGHTS ISSUE HE WAS A HUGE ADVOCATE AND

FIGHTER FOR LBGTQ RIGHTS AND MARRIAGE EQUALITY.

HE TRANSCENDED ALL THESE ERAS AND PERIODS OF TIME, BUT ALWAYS

CONSISTENTLY FIGHTING FOR EQUALITY AND DIGNITY FOR ALL

PEOPLE >> Seth: I KNOW THAT YOU ARE

NOW, AS WE SPEAK OF DIGNITY FOR ALL PEOPLE, OFTENTIMES THAT IS

THE CASE OF HAVING THE MONEY TO SUPPORT YOUR FAMILY, PUT FOOD ON

THE TABLE. YOU WERE DEBATING THE $600 THAT

IS ABOUT TO EXPIRE >> RIGHT

>> Seth: CAN YOU SPEAK TO WHY THAT NUMBER IS BOTH ECONOMICALLY

AND MORALLY SOUND, AND ALSO CAN YOU SPEAK TO THE ARGUMENT THAT,

BY GIVING AMERICANS MONEY, WE ARE DISINCENTIVIZING THEM TO

RETURN TO A WORK FORCE, EVEN THOUGH THOSE JOBS, IN MOST

CASES, AREN'T THERE? >> SO WE HAVE HAD OVER

40 MILLION PEOPLE AT ONE TIME OR ANOTHER IN THE LAST FEW MONTHS

LOSE THEIR JOBS. CURRENTLY, WE HAVE A NUMBER OF

ABOUT 17 MILLION PEOPLE ARE CURRENTLY UNEMPLOYED

INTERESTINGLY ENOUGH, 50% OF AFRICAN AMERICAN WORKERS ARE NOW

UNEMPLOYED SINCE THE PANDEMIC. IN JUNE, SETH, ONE‐THIRD OF

AMERICANS WERE NOT ABLE TO PAY THEIR HOUSING COSTS, RENT OR

MORTGAGE ONE IN FIVE MOTHERS, LIKE I SAID

EARLIER, IS DESCRIBING HER CHILDREN UNDER THE AGE OF 12 AS

BEING HUNGRY PEOPLE ARE HURTING IN AMERICA,

HURTING DEEPLY AND SO WHAT I AM PROPOSING IS

THAT DURING THE COURSE OF THIS PANDEMIC, UNTIL WE HAVE SEEN OUR

WAY OUT OF IT, THERE SHOULD BE A MORATORIUM ON EVICTIONS, A

MORATORIUM ON FORECLOSURES, THAT THERE SHOULD BE A MORATORIUM,

WHICH MEANS BASICALLY A PAUSE ON TURNING OFF PEOPLE'S UTILITIES,

INCLUDING THEIR WATER SERVICE. BECAUSE BY THE WAY, PEOPLE CAN'T

PAY THEIR WATER BILLS WHEN THEY ARE NOT WORKING, AND YOU NEED TO

WASH YOUR HANDS TO PROTECT YOUR FAMILY FROM THE VIRUS.

SO THAT'S WHAT MY R. E. L. I. E. F. ACT CALLS FOR, JUST

TO GIVE PEOPLE RELIEF AND LET THEM JUST ‐‐ TO THE EXTENT THAT

WE CAN, SURVIVE THROUGH THE COURSE OF THIS PANDEMIC SO THAT

AT THE END OF IT THEY CAN GET BACK ON THEIR FEET

WE DON'T WANT PEOPLE TO FALL FURTHER AND FURTHER THROUGH THE

CRACKS BECAUSE AT SOME POINT WE NEED TO

RECOVER. SO LET'S SEE PEOPLE AND CARRY

THEM THROUGH THE DAYS AND MONTHS TO GET ON THE OTHER SIDE AND

WITH DIGNITY >> Seth: I DO ‐‐ BECAUSE

OBVIOUSLY THIS IS A VERY SERIOUS TOPIC WE ARE TALKING ABOUT

BUT ON A LIGHTER SIDE, I DO WANT TO COMPLIMENT ‐‐ THE

R.E.L.I.E.F. ACT IS AN ACRONYM I WANT TO MAKE SURE I GET THIS

RIGHT. RENT EMERGENCIES LEAVE IMPACTS

ON EVICTED FAMILIES ACT. WHO COMES UP WITH THE ACRONYMS,

SENATOR? [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]

>> THERE IS LIKE A WHOLE GROUP OF PEOPLE WHO WORK ON THOSE

THINGS IT'S REALLY KIND OF PART OF THE

FUNNY ART OF THE UNITED STATES CONGRESS

LIKE, THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO SPEND A LOT OF TIME COMING UP WITH

THESE ACRONYMS, AND THEY ARE OFTEN VERY GOOD, INCLUDING ‐

>> Seth: I GUESS THE GOAL OF THESE ACRONYMS IS YOU WANT TO

MAKE IT SO THAT, YOU KNOW ‐‐ AND THIS IS EITHER PARTY WOULD DO

THIS YOU TRY TO NAME IT SOMETHING

THAT YOU WOULD SHAME YOUR COLLEAGUES INTO VOTING AGAINST,

SOMETHING LIKE THE R. E. L. I. E. F. ACT OR THE C. A. R. E. S. ACT OR ‐‐

I MEAN, IT SEEMS TO ME LIKE YOU SHOULD TRY TO MAKE ‐

>> THE H. E. R. O. E. S. ACT. >> Seth: THE K. I. T. T. E. N. ACT.

JUST ANYTHING. >> RIGHT

NO, RIGHT. LIKE, I DON'T KNOW THAT WE HAVE

YET HAD THE SANTA CLAUS ACT, BUT I THINK YOU ARE RAISING A FAIR

POINT. >> Seth: YEAH.

>> I THINK ‐‐ BUT IT IS ALSO ABOUT SPEAKING TO THE VALUES

THAT ARE AT PLAY IN THE LEGISLATION AND CERTAINLY WITH

THE R. E. L. I. E. F. ACT, IT IS ‐‐ THAT IS A VERY IMPORTANT VALUE

>> Seth: YES, THAT IS A FAIR ONE.

THE ACRONYM DOES LINE UP WITH THE CORE PRINCIPLES BEHIND THE

ACT. >> YEAH.

YEAH >> Seth: WE'LL BE BACK WITH MORE

FROM SENATOR KAMALA HARRIS ♪

>> Seth: HERE IS MORE OF MY CONVERSATION WITH SENATOR

KAMALA HARRIS. >> Seth: YOU AND CORY BOOKER ‐‐

I KNOW YOU HAVE TRIED TO SPEARHEAD POLICE REFORM.

THIS IS SOMETHING THAT HAS STALLED IN THE SENATE.

DO YOU HAVE ANY OPTIMISM MOVING FORWARD THAT THERE IS GOING TO

BE SOMETHING THAT CAN GET THROUGH THE SENATE AND MAKE IT

TO THE PRESIDENT'S DESK? >> I AM HOPEFUL, BUT, YOU KNOW,

EVERYONE HAS TO PARTICIPATE. SO THE WORK THAT CORY BOOKER AND

I DID WAS AROUND THE JUSTICE IN POLICING ACT AND IN MOST OF OUR

COLLEAGUES ON THE DEMOCRATIC SIDE IN THE SENATE SUPPORT IT.

ON THE HOUSE SIDE, THERE WAS BIPARTISAN SUPPORT FOR A SIMILAR

MEASURE WHICH HAS NOW BEEN NAMED THE GEORGE FLOYD JUSTICE AND

POLICING ACT AND BIPARTISAN SUPPORT, THE

CONGRESSIONAL BLACK CAUCUS WAS THE LEADER ON IT, AND I AM

URGING MITCH McCONNELL, ALONG WITH MANY OF US ‐‐ PUT IT NOW ON

THE FLOOR FOR A VOTE BECAUSE IT'S JUST ‐‐

IT'S FAIR, IT'S REASONABLE, IT'S PRACTICAL.

IT SAYS THAT WE SHOULD HAVE THINGS LIKE A NATIONAL STANDARD

FOR EXCESSIVE USE OF FORCE SO WHEN A POLICE OFFICER USES

EXCESSIVE FORCE, THE QUESTION WE SHOULD ASK IS NOT "WAS THAT

REASONABLE," WHICH IS WHAT CURRENTLY WE ASK, WE SHOULD

ASK ‐‐ BECAUSE YOU CAN REASON AWAY ANYTHING.

WE SHOULD BE ASKING, "WAS THAT NECESSARY?

WE ARE SAYING THAT THERE SHOULD BE INDEPENDENT INVESTIGATIONS

BECAUSE THE PROSECUTOR WHO WORKS WITH THAT POLICE DEPARTMENT

EVERY DAY WILL AT LEAST HAVE AN APPEARANCE OF A CONFLICT OF

INTEREST, AND WE WANT TO BRING INTEGRITY TO THE SYSTEM.

SO THESE ARE SOME OF THE THINGS THAT WE'RE TALKING ABOUT, AND,

YOU KNOW, PEOPLE ARE MARCHING IN THE STREETS BY THE HUNDREDS OF

THOUSANDS IF NOT MILLIONS. PEOPLE WHO SEEMINGLY HAVE

NOTHING IN COMMON ARE JOINING TOGETHER BECAUSE THEY ARE NOW

SEEING IN VIVID DETAIL, BECAUSE OF SMARTPHONES, WHAT

COMMUNITIES, AND IN PARTICULAR THE BLACK COMMUNITY, HAS KNOWN

FOR GENERATIONS. AND THERE NEEDS TO BE

ACCOUNTABILITY AND CONSEQUENCE ON THIS ISSUE, AND WE DON'T NEED

TO STUDY IT. WE'VE STUDIED IT FOR

GENERATIONS. EMMETT TILL'S MOTHER WAS TRYING

TO HELP US FIGURE THIS OUT WHEN SHE HAD THE COURAGE TO LEAVE

THAT OPEN CASKET TO SHOW THE WORLD THE BRUTALITY THAT WE'RE

TALKING ABOUT. WE DON'T NEED TO STUDY IT

ANYMORE. WE NEED TO ACT

AND THAT'S WHAT OUR LEGISLATION WOULD DO

AND SO I ENCOURAGE EVERYONE TO ENCOURAGE MITCH McCONNELL TO PUT

IT ON THE FLOOR FOR A VOTE >> Seth: HE SEEMS TO BE A PRETTY

EASILY CONVINCED GUY WHEN IT COMES TO BRINGING SOMETHING TO A

VOTE [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]

OLD MITCH JUST NEEDS A LITTLE ENCOURAGEMENT.

>> ENCOURAGE HIM TO PUT THE JOHN LEWIS VOTING RIGHTS ACT ON

THE FLOOR FOR A VOTE SO WE CAN PUT TEETH BACK INTO

VOTING RIGHTS AND MAKE SURE THAT THE ELECTIONS THAT WE HAVE

COMING UP ALLOW EVERYONE TO PARTICIPATE EQUALLY.

>> Seth: THERE ‐‐ I WANT TO FINISH WITH THIS

THERE IS A SHORT LIST. I DON'T KNOW IF YOU ARE AWARE OF

THIS THERE IS A SHORT LIST FOR VP

AND IT'S LIKE A LIST OF NAMES OF PEOPLE

AND SOME WOULD SAY THAT YOU MIGHT BE ON THAT LIST.

SO DO YOU WANT TO GIVE ME A VERY SAFE ANSWER THAT YOU MIGHT HAVE

PREPLANNED THAT YOU GIVE TO PEOPLE WHEN THEY SAY, "WHAT

WOULD YOU ‐‐ WOULD YOU WANT TO BE VICE PRESIDENT?

[ LAUGHTER ] JUST MAKE IT SOUND ‐

>> LET ME READ MY ANSWER >> Seth: THERE YOU GO.

WE'LL JUST LEAVE IT AT THAT. >> NO, BUT LET ME ‐‐ NO, LET ME

SAY THIS LET ME SAY THIS.

I AM HONORED TO BE A PART OF THIS DISCUSSION, AND I SAY THIS

TO YOU FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART AND SOUL

WE HAVE TO ELECT JOE BIDEN THE NEXT PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED

STATES AND I WILL DO EVERYTHING IN MY

POWER REGARDLESS OF WHERE I AM WE HAVE TO ELECT HIM

WE CANNOT ENDURE ANOTHER FOUR YEARS OF DONALD TRUMP.

WE NEED A PRESIDENT WHO, AT THIS MOMENT IN TIME, HAS COMPASSION,

WHO WAS EMPATHY, WHO HAS A SENSE OF DIGNITY, SELF‐DIGNITY AND

LIFTING UP THE DIGNITY OF OTHERS, SOMEBODY WHO FIGHTS FOR

WORKING FAMILIES THAT'S WHO JOE BIDEN IS.

I KNOW JOE THIS IS LITERALLY WHO HE IS.

AND WE NEED TO SAVE THE SOUL OF OUR COUNTRY.

WE REALLY DO WE NEED A PRESIDENT WHO CARES

ABOUT THE PEOPLE AND LOVES THE PEOPLE

BUT, YOU KNOW, TALK ABOUT JOHN LEWIS

LET'S CONNECT THESE TWO THINGS YOU KNOW, PART OF THE LEADERSHIP

IN THE PAST OF JOHN LEWIS IS HE WAS MOTIVATED BY LOVE.

>> Seth: WELL, I THINK THAT IS A NICE PLACE TO LEAVE IT

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR MAKING TIME FOR US AGAIN, SENATOR

>> THANK YOU GOOD TO BE HERE AGAIN.

>> Seth: HAVE A GREAT REST OF YOUR WEEK.

>> TAKE CARE >> Seth: WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK

WITH MORE "LATE NIGHT. ♪

>> Seth: REGIS PHILBIN PASSED AWAY THIS WEEKEND.

AS GREAT A TV HOST AS WE ARE EVER LIKELY TO SEE

I WAS LUCKY ENOUGH TO MEET REGIS A FEW TIMES, AND IT WAS A

DELIGHT HOW HE WAS EXACTLY THE SAME IN PERSON AS HE WAS ON

TELEVISION THE MOST AMAZING THING ABOUT

REGIS WASN'T HIS CONTAGIOUS ENTHUSIASM, IT WAS HOW MANY

YEARS HE MAINTAINED THAT CONTAGIOUS ENTHUSIASM.

WE SEND OUR CONDOLENCES TO HIS WIFE, JOY, AND THE REST OF HIS

FAMILY REGIS WILL BE MISSED

WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK. ♪

>> Seth: OUR NEXT GUEST IS A SUPER BOWL AND COLLEGE FOOTBALL

NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP‐WINNING COACH.

HE SERVES AS THE HEAD COACH OF THE SEATTLE SEAHAWKS AND HIS

AUDIBLE ORIGINAL, "COMPETE TO CREATE: AN APPROACH TO LIVING

AND LEADING AUTHENTICALLY," IS

AVAILABLE NOW. HERE'S MY CONVERSATION WITH PETE CARROLL

>> Seth: HOW ARE YOU DOING TODAY,

COACH? >> HEY

DOING ALL RIGHT. GLAD TO BE WITH YOU.

>> Seth: SO I HAVE TO IMAGINE THIS IS AN OFF SEASON LIKE NO

OTHER. HOW IS VIRTUAL PREPARATION GOING

FOR YOU SO FAR >> MAN, YOU'D BE SURPRISED HOW

MUCH WE HAVE DUG IN, YOU KNOW. EVERY DAY, DAY IN AND DAY OUT,

WITH THE PLAYERS AND YOU'RE NOT JUST TRYING TO

PASS ALONG INFORMATION YOU'RE TRYING TO KEEP THEM FIRED

UP AND HAVING FUN, AND STAYING ENGAGED AND ALL.

SO IT'S BEEN A REAL PROCESS. WE'VE TAKEN AN APPROACH, LET'S

MAKE IT AS FUN AS CAN BE AND TRY TO CREATE WAYS TO, YOU KNOW,

KEEP THE INTEREST GOING. AND WE REALLY HAD A GOOD RUN AT

IT SO WE'RE PREPARED, AS WE'RE

GOING TO BE VIRTUAL HERE WHEN WE COME TO CAMP IN A COUPLE OF

DAYS AND SO, WE'RE PREPARED TO DO IT.

>> Seth: YOU HAVE ALWAYS BEEN SOMEONE WHO IS KNOWN FOR YOUR

OPTIMISM, KNOWN FOR YOUR ‐ >> NO, NO WAY.

NO WAY >> Seth: YEAH.

WELL, I WOULD SAY THAT OPTIMISM IS PROBABLY A PRETTY HELPFUL

TOOL RIGHT NOW YOU KNOW, OBVIOUSLY, WE'VE SEEN,

YOU KNOW, THE NBA IS TRYING TO MAKE A GO, THE NHL, MAJOR LEAGUE

BASEBALL STARTED THIS WEEK WE'VE ALREADY SEEN, YOU KNOW, IN

FLORIDA THEY'RE HAVING SOME ISSUES

>> RIGHT >> Seth: ARE YOU OPTIMISTIC THAT

THE SEASON IS GOING TO COME OFF? >> WELL, YEAH.

I DON'T HAVE ANY OTHER WAY OF LOOKING AT IT THAN LIKE THAT,

SETH YOU KNOW, THAT'S THE ONLY WAY WE

GO HERE. BUT I DO THINK AT A TIME LIKE

THIS, AND THROUGH ALL OF THESE TIMES, THAT IT IS A TOOL THAT

HELPS YOU. YOU KNOW

IT'S A MENTALITY IT'S LOOKING FORWARD TO

SOMETHING GOOD IS JUST ABOUT TO HAPPEN, AND THAT KIND OF THOUGHT

PROCESS DOES HELP YOU. WE'RE GOING TO HAVE TO ‐‐ YOU

KNOW, EVERYBODY IS MISSING OUT ON THEIR NORMAL WAYS, AND WE

HAVE TO OVERCOME THAT KIND OF, YOU KNOW, THOSE CHALLENGES

AND WE HAVE TO DO IT WITH ATTITUDE

IT'S REALLY ‐‐ IT'S ABOUT YOUR ATTITUDE SO ‐‐ FOR EVERYBODY

IT'S ABOUT OUR ATTITUDE. AND WE ARE GOING TO TRY TO

REALLY CHAMPION THE CAUSE, BE FORWARD THINKING AND POSITIVE,

SUPPORT ONE ANOTHER AND MAKE THE VERY BEST OF THIS.

AND WE ARE GOING TO KICK BUTT. THAT'S REALLY THE ONLY WAY I

KNOW HOW TO GO ABOUT IT. >> Seth: YOU HAVE THIS AUDIBLE

ORIGINAL CALLED "COMPETE TO CREATE."

THIS HAS ALWAYS BEEN ‐‐ OR I SHOULD SAY IT'S BASED ON YOUR

PHILOSOPHY, AND THIS IS NOT JUST A WAY FOR ATHLETES TO SORT OF

MAXIMIZE THEIR POTENTIAL, THIS IS FOR EVERYONE.

HOW DID YOU COME UP WITH THIS IDEA, AND WHAT MADE YOU WANT TO

GET IT OUT THERE FOR EVERYONE TO LISTEN TO?

>> WELL, IT'S REALLY JUST A ‐‐ IT'S A ILLUSTRATION OF, YOU

KNOW, OF OUR PHILOSOPHY AND HOW WE'VE APPROACHED, YOU KNOW, OUR

WORK FOR YEARS AND THIS IS NOT NEW FOR US

BUT I FOUND THAT THERE WAS ‐‐ THERE WAS A LOT OF INTEREST.

AND THERE HAVE BEEN PEOPLE THAT HAVE ALWAYS BEEN KIND OF

CLAMORING FOR WHY ARE YOU DOING WHAT YOU'RE DOING.

WE DON'T DO THINGS EXACTLY THE SAME AS EVERYBODY ELSE NOW

YOU KNOW, WE'RE A LITTLE DIFFERENT.

AND IN THAT, YOU KNOW, THERE'S A WAY ABOUT US AND THERE'S A

CULTURE ABOUT US THAT A LOT OF PEOPLE ARE INTERESTED IN

SO WE'VE CREATED A LITTLE BUSINESS AND WE HAVE BEEN

HELPING SOME CORPORATIONS AND SOME PEOPLE, YOU KNOW, AS WE DO

OUR FOOTBALL, AND THIS IS ON THE SIDE

BUT WE ALSO THOUGHT IT WOULD BE IMPORTANT TO BE ABLE TO HAND IT

TO MORE PEOPLE IF THEY WANT TO SO THE AUDIBLE ORIGINAL IS

SOMETHING, YOU KNOW, THAT WE'VE CREATED TO REALLY SHARE OUR

IDEAS AND THOUGHTS WITH PEOPLE AROUND THE WORLD IF THEY'RE

INTERESTED SO IT'S NOT JUST ABOUT SPORTS.

YOU KNOW, IT'S ABOUT A LOT OF OTHER THINGS

SO IT'S ‐‐ SHOULD BE FUN FOR PEOPLE

>> Seth: THIS SEASON IS ALSO NOT JUST GOING TO BE ABOUT SPORTS.

WE ARE GOING TO BE DEALING WITH COVID‐19, OBVIOUSLY, AND WE'RE

ALSO GOING TO HAVE SOCIAL JUSTICE ISSUES WHICH HAVE BEEN A

PART OF, YOU KNOW, THE LEAGUE'S HISTORY THESE LAST FEW YEARS,

BUT WILL DEFINITELY BE AT THE FOREFRONT.

HOW DO YOU THINK EVERYONE IS GOING TO DEAL WITH THAT?

DO YOU THINK IT'S GOING TO BE A SUM POSITIVE FOR THE LEAGUE

MOVING FORWARD, THE FACT THAT IT SEEMS LIKE AT THE COMMISSIONER

LEVEL THERE IS AN EMBRACING OF THE FACT THAT THESE ARE

IMPORTANT THINGS WE ARE TALKING ABOUT?

>> YEAH. THIS ‐‐ WE'RE TALKING LIFE NOW

WE ARE IN THE MIDST OF A WHOLE CYCLE THAT WE ARE EITHER GOING

TO DO WELL WITH IT OR NOT. WE HAVE DO WELL WITH IT.

SO WE HAVE TO STAY ON TOPIC, WE ‐‐ WHETHER IT'S DEALING WITH

THE MENTALITY OF THE PANDEMIC AND THE COVID THING.

YOU KNOW, THAT'S ABOUT MINDSET, AND WE ARE GOING TO BE WORKING

HARD AT THAT BUT REALLY WHAT'S COMING AT US

HERE IS WAY MORE IN TERMS OF EQUALITY, IN TERMS OF INJUSTICE

THAT WE SEE EVERYWHERE YOU KNOW, WE HAVE JUST DIVED

RIGHT INTO IT WITH OUR PLAYERS, AS WE ALWAYS HAVE, BUT EVEN MORE

SO WITH A GREATER CONCERN AND A GREATER FOCUS THAN EVER.

AND I THINK THAT'S A REALLY GOOD THING FOR US AS WE HAVE TO MAKE

PROGRESS HERE. SO WHAT WE'RE DOING, SETH, IS WE

ARE GOING TO JUST CONTINUE TO KEEP IT ON THE FRONT OF OUR

MINDS AND KEEP TALKING AND KEEP SHARING OUR IDEAS AND SHARING

OUR STORIES. AND COMMUNICATING WITH EVERYBODY

AND MAKING SURE THAT WE DON'T BACK AWAY OR LOSE SIGHT OF THE

FACT THAT WE HAVE A LOT TO DO HERE, AND THERE IS A LOT OF WORK

TO DO, OUR PLAYERS ARE EXTRAORDINARY.

THE MESSAGING THAT THEY CAN SEND OUT, WHAT THEY STAND FOR, WHAT

THEY HAVE BEEN THROUGH, HOW THEY CAN TEACH.

THEY'RE A REMARKABLE GROUP, AND WE NEED THEM TO MAKE SURE AND

STAY, YOU KNOW, VIGILANT AND ‐‐ BECAUSE THIS IS SOMETHING THAT

ISN'T GOING AWAY THIS IS A LIFETIME COMMITMENT, I

THINK, OF TURNING THINGS AND WE ARE GOING TO DO IT BY

CARING FOR PEOPLE, AND CARING FOR ONE ANOTHER, AND SHOWING HOW

IMPORTANT IT IS TO SEE AND HEAR AND FEEL, YOU KNOW, EVERYBODY

AROUND US. SO, WE'RE LOOKING FORWARD TO THE

CHALLENGE OF THAT. IT'S GOING TO BE A REMARKABLE

SEASON IT'S A REMARKABLE YEAR IN SO

MANY WAYS THAT WE NEED TO TAKE THE CHALLENGE AND DO WELL WITH

IT SO LOOKING FORWARD TO IT

>> Seth: YOU'RE SORT OF KNOWN FOR A COMPASSIONATE LEADERSHIP

STYLE THAT IS MAYBE NOT A STEREOTYPICAL STYLE THAT WE

THINK OF WHEN WE THINK OF FOOTBALL COACHES

DO YOU FIND WHEN PLAYERS FIRST COME INTO YOUR SYSTEM THAT

THEY'RE A LITTLE TAKEN ABACK BY HAVING A COACH LIKE YOU, OR DO

THEY EMBRACE IT RIGHT AWAY >> WELL, THERE'S ALWAYS A LITTLE

BIT OF ‐‐ SEEMINGLY A LITTLE BIT OF ANTICIPATION OF LIKE, "WHAT

AM I GETTING INTO HERE WHAT IS THIS?"

YOU KNOW, I'VE HEARD THIS AND THAT ABOUT IT.

AND SO WE TRY TO SHOCK THE HECK OUT OF THEM FROM THE MOMENT THAT

THEY GET TO US ABOUT THE WAY WE LIKE TO INTERACT, THE WAY WE

LIKE TO BUILD OUR RELATIONSHIPS, AND COUNT ON ONE ANOTHER

AND, YOU KNOW, THIS IS SUCH A DIFFICULT CHALLENGE TO BRING ALL

OF THESE GUYS TOGETHER TO MAKE A TEAM AND TO GO UP AGAINST THE

EXTRAORDINARY COMPETITION THAT WE FACE, THAT IT TAKES EVERY

SINGLE ASPECT OF EVERYTHING WE GOT TO BE GOOD

AND I THINK WHEN IT REALLY COMES FROM YOUR HEART AND GUYS ARE

TUNED IN AND THEY'RE CONNECTED AND THEY LEARN TO FEEL WHAT IT

IS TO BE A GREAT TEAMMATE FOR ONE ANOTHER, THEN YOU CAN DO

SOME GREAT THINGS. AND THAT'S THE CHALLENGE WE ARE

UP AGAINST EVERY YEAR. AND IF WE'RE NOT HAVING FUN, I'M

SCREWING IT UP YOU KNOW, SO ALWAYS REMEMBER

THAT WE'RE PLAYING FOOTBALL. AND SO I WANT TO KEEP THAT IN

MIND AT ALL TIMES AND MAKE IT AS GOOD AS WE CAN FOR OUR GUYS.

HOPEFULLY, YOU KNOW, WE'LL SHOCK THEM A LITTLE BIT, YEAH.

BUT WE'RE GOING TO DO SOME GREAT THINGS ALONG THE WAY, TOO.

>> Seth: YOU'VE MANAGED TO TAKE FROM ‐‐ OBVIOUSLY, WE'RE, IN

NORMAL TIMES, A NEW YORK‐BASED SHOW

NEW YORK USED TO BE HOME OF ONE OF THE BEST SAFETIES IN THE NFL,

AND NOW I THINK HE'S A ‐‐ I THINK HE'S ‐‐ IS IT OFFICIAL

NOW? HAS HE PASSED HIS PHYSICAL

IS JAMAL ADAMS OFFICIALLY A SEAHAWK?

>> WELL, HE DID. HE HAS, AND HE'S FLYING TODAY.

SO I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT HIS PHYSICAL YET

BUT, YEAH, THERE'S A LOT OF GREAT THINGS THAT HAVE COME OUT

OF NEW YORK. AND SO, HE'S KIND OF ‐‐ HE'S

KIND OF BEEN TRANSPLANTED FROM DALLAS

BUT HE HAD HIS TIME THERE. I'M REALLY APPRECIATIVE THAT

THEY SENT HIM UP WE ARE THRILLED TO HAVE THIS

PLAYER COMING TO US. HE'S GOT AN EXTRAORDINARY

ABILITY LEVEL, BUT HE'S GOT A CHARACTER.

HE'S GOT A PERSONALITY HE'S GOT JUICE ABOUT HIM THAT

CAN HELP OTHER GUYS PLAY WELL. SO, YOU KNOW, I'M PRETTY FIRED

UP ABOUT THAT. OUR TEAM IS, AS WELL

AND I'M HOPING HE WILL FIND A REALLY GOOD PLACE FOR HIMSELF

HERE IN SEATTLE. >> Seth: WELL, I CAN'T TELL YOU

HOW ‐‐ THE THINGS I REALIZE ARE VERY IMPORTANT FOR MY RETURN TO

NORMALCY ARE THAT MY KIDS CAN GO TO SCHOOL AND I CAN WATCH

FOOTBALL ON SUNDAY I KNOW ONE IS MORE IMPORTANT

THAN THE OTHER BUT RATIONALLY, IT WILL BE VERY

IMPORTANT FOR ME SO I WISH YOU AND ENTIRE LEAGUE

THE BEST OF LUCK AND IT'S NICE TO HAVE A COACH

THAT I KNOW PUTS THINGS LIKE SAFETY FIRST, AND THANKS FOR

MAKING TIME FOR US >> ALL RIGHT, I APPRECIATE IT.

THANKS, SETH >> Seth: WE WILL BE RIGHT BACK

WITH MORE "LATE NIGHT. ♪

>> Seth: I WANT TO THANK MY GUESTS SENATOR KAMALA HARRIS AND

PETE CARROLL I WANT TO THANK FRED ARMISEN AND

THE 8G BAND. STAYED TUNED FOR "LILLY SINGH.

STAY SAFE, WASH YOUR HANDS, WEAR A MASK

WE LOVE YOU. ♪

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