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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,759 --> 00:00:03,069 [tense techno music] 2 00:00:51,741 --> 00:00:55,431 [otherworldly electronica music] 3 00:00:55,434 --> 00:00:56,574 [crickets chirping] 4 00:00:56,573 --> 00:00:58,853 [thunder rumbling] 5 00:00:58,851 --> 00:01:01,961 - You suffer from a laundry list of maladies. 6 00:01:01,958 --> 00:01:06,928 ADD, schizophrenia, borderline personality disorder, 7 00:01:07,653 --> 00:01:08,973 just to name a few. 8 00:01:08,965 --> 00:01:13,245 And your condition is so acute, it's absurd. 9 00:01:13,245 --> 00:01:15,485 You're tethering on the edge. 10 00:01:15,489 --> 00:01:18,599 [crickets chirping] 11 00:01:18,595 --> 00:01:20,175 And to make things worse, 12 00:01:20,183 --> 00:01:22,013 you smell like you've been sleeping 13 00:01:22,012 --> 00:01:24,532 on a two-week-old placenta. 14 00:01:24,532 --> 00:01:27,022 You're a complete disaster. 15 00:01:27,017 --> 00:01:27,917 [electronic reverberation] 16 00:01:27,915 --> 00:01:29,535 - You so funny. 17 00:01:29,537 --> 00:01:30,807 [exclaiming excitedly] 18 00:01:30,814 --> 00:01:33,514 I guess I am a little kooky and weird, huh? 19 00:01:33,507 --> 00:01:35,027 But I kinda like it. 20 00:01:35,025 --> 00:01:36,195 Ooh! 21 00:01:36,199 --> 00:01:37,439 [grunting disgustedly] 22 00:01:37,442 --> 00:01:39,032 - Listen, you're in your manic phase, 23 00:01:39,029 --> 00:01:41,099 and there's nothing charming about that. 24 00:01:41,101 --> 00:01:42,691 - I can't help it. 25 00:01:42,688 --> 00:01:45,998 I love everybody, and everybody, they love me. 26 00:01:46,002 --> 00:01:50,322 I love you, too, even though you're being a Debbie Downer. 27 00:01:50,317 --> 00:01:51,277 [exclaiming happily] 28 00:01:51,283 --> 00:01:54,913 - It is not love, it's sickness! 29 00:01:54,976 --> 00:01:58,456 - Turn that frown upside down, Dumbo. 30 00:01:58,463 --> 00:02:00,953 We have to get together and change the world 31 00:02:00,948 --> 00:02:03,118 with happiness and fun times. 32 00:02:03,123 --> 00:02:05,643 Join me, why won't you? 33 00:02:05,642 --> 00:02:09,472 - I'm not joining you anywhere, you filthy lunatic. 34 00:02:09,474 --> 00:02:11,794 You're a danger to yourself and to others! 35 00:02:11,786 --> 00:02:14,956 - Dangerously sexy and salacious. 36 00:02:14,962 --> 00:02:16,862 Ooh, naughty boys and girls. 37 00:02:16,860 --> 00:02:18,860 Oh, ooh! [exclaiming lustily] 38 00:02:18,862 --> 00:02:20,142 [growling menacingly] 39 00:02:20,140 --> 00:02:22,250 [humming cheerfully] 40 00:02:22,245 --> 00:02:25,315 - I'm so sexy, I'm so wonderful, I'm so salacious. 41 00:02:25,317 --> 00:02:26,557 La, la, la, la, la la! 42 00:02:26,560 --> 00:02:28,840 Oo, oo, oo, oo, oo, oo, oo, oo. 43 00:02:28,838 --> 00:02:31,768 - This should remedy your hyperactivity. 44 00:02:31,772 --> 00:02:34,152 [humming happily] 45 00:02:34,154 --> 00:02:35,954 [dramatic music] 46 00:02:35,948 --> 00:02:36,778 - Hm? 47 00:02:41,022 --> 00:02:44,512 - That's right, this brilliant medical professional 48 00:02:44,509 --> 00:02:48,439 has asserted complete control. 49 00:02:48,444 --> 00:02:50,584 [menacing laughter] 50 00:02:50,584 --> 00:02:52,454 This will stop you from struggling, 51 00:02:52,448 --> 00:02:54,828 I don't want you to hurt yourself. 52 00:02:56,141 --> 00:02:59,661 [exclaiming questioningly] 53 00:03:01,733 --> 00:03:03,363 Ah, yes. 54 00:03:03,355 --> 00:03:07,595 Subjugation is the finest cure. 55 00:03:07,601 --> 00:03:10,051 [inhaling deeply] 56 00:03:10,051 --> 00:03:10,881 [exhaling calmly] 57 00:03:10,880 --> 00:03:13,920 [otherworldly music] 58 00:03:21,373 --> 00:03:22,963 [phone ringing] 59 00:03:22,961 --> 00:03:24,581 [Doctor Sado sighing contentedly] 60 00:03:24,583 --> 00:03:25,693 [phone ringing] 61 00:03:25,688 --> 00:03:26,998 [Doctor Sado exclaiming excitedly] 62 00:03:26,999 --> 00:03:30,039 - Hello, my voluptuous vampiress. 63 00:03:30,037 --> 00:03:31,277 [Temptress coughing sickly] 64 00:03:31,280 --> 00:03:32,800 - [Temptress] Doctor Sado, I can't come in, 65 00:03:32,798 --> 00:03:34,628 I'm, [sneezing loudly] I'm really sick. 66 00:03:34,628 --> 00:03:36,558 - Oh no, Temptress! 67 00:03:36,561 --> 00:03:39,391 Should I come by with some chicken soup? 68 00:03:39,391 --> 00:03:42,191 I hate to see you under the weather. 69 00:03:42,187 --> 00:03:45,427 Maybe I can prescribe some TLC 70 00:03:45,432 --> 00:03:47,852 to nurse you back to health, huh? 71 00:03:47,848 --> 00:03:48,708 [moaning loudly] 72 00:03:48,711 --> 00:03:49,571 - Oh my god! 73 00:03:49,574 --> 00:03:50,824 [coughing heavily] 74 00:03:50,816 --> 00:03:52,816 No, no, no, I'm sorry, I'm really contagious. 75 00:03:52,818 --> 00:03:54,858 I just really think I need to take a day of rest 76 00:03:54,855 --> 00:03:56,435 and really get on top of it. 77 00:03:56,443 --> 00:03:57,933 - [Doctor Sado] Okay, sexy. 78 00:03:57,927 --> 00:04:01,337 Just take it easy then, but call me later. 79 00:04:01,344 --> 00:04:03,284 I'm concerned for the welfare 80 00:04:03,277 --> 00:04:07,107 of that vivaciously alluring body. 81 00:04:07,108 --> 00:04:08,318 - You promise? 82 00:04:08,317 --> 00:04:11,107 I just don't want you to get this cat scratch fever. 83 00:04:11,147 --> 00:04:13,697 [moaning excitedly] 84 00:04:13,701 --> 00:04:14,811 Ah fuck! 85 00:04:14,806 --> 00:04:16,076 [aroused gasping] 86 00:04:16,083 --> 00:04:18,293 Okay, Sven, I really want to get nailed, 87 00:04:18,292 --> 00:04:20,572 and your tip'll depend on it. 88 00:04:20,570 --> 00:04:24,230 - Don't worry, baby, I'm digging in with my delicious claws. 89 00:04:24,229 --> 00:04:25,709 I know you like it deep. 90 00:04:25,713 --> 00:04:26,543 - Oh, yes! 91 00:04:28,716 --> 00:04:31,306 Oh my god, Sven! 92 00:04:31,305 --> 00:04:32,815 [gasping excitedly] 93 00:04:32,824 --> 00:04:36,244 Oh, fuck yeah, really dig into that stuffed crust! 94 00:04:37,242 --> 00:04:39,622 [moaning excitedly] 95 00:04:39,624 --> 00:04:40,454 Fuck! 96 00:04:42,005 --> 00:04:43,865 [signing unhappily] 97 00:04:43,869 --> 00:04:45,769 - Well, this is shaping up to be 98 00:04:45,768 --> 00:04:49,668 a demoralizing shitty fucking morning! 99 00:04:50,669 --> 00:04:52,809 I need my daily affirmation. 100 00:04:55,225 --> 00:04:58,055 - Hello, I'm Galactica Darkstar. 101 00:04:58,056 --> 00:05:01,606 Welcome to the Whorecast for the New Nihilistic Reality. 102 00:05:01,611 --> 00:05:04,171 Today we'll be talking about your vagina. 103 00:05:04,165 --> 00:05:07,095 What is it doing, what does it want to be doing, 104 00:05:07,099 --> 00:05:08,339 and what is it telling you 105 00:05:08,342 --> 00:05:11,312 about whether you want to live or die? 106 00:05:12,691 --> 00:05:15,591 We'll begin by picking up our phones and dialing 107 00:05:17,282 --> 00:05:18,592 69 108 00:05:18,594 --> 00:05:20,014 69 109 00:05:20,009 --> 00:05:21,289 420 110 00:05:21,286 --> 00:05:22,106 fuck you. 111 00:05:24,185 --> 00:05:26,425 Hello, I'd like to make a collect call! 112 00:05:27,534 --> 00:05:30,124 Hello, this is Galactica Darkstar. 113 00:05:30,122 --> 00:05:31,332 I have my period. 114 00:05:32,987 --> 00:05:34,467 Do you have your period? 115 00:05:35,990 --> 00:05:39,030 Please leave your message at the sound of my period. 116 00:05:39,028 --> 00:05:42,448 [noisy slurping] 117 00:05:42,445 --> 00:05:43,195 Goodbye. 118 00:05:49,556 --> 00:05:52,516 - She always finds a way to cheer me up. 119 00:05:56,183 --> 00:05:59,843 [sighing contentedly] 120 00:05:59,842 --> 00:06:01,642 ♪ Sexy ferret, sexy ferret 121 00:06:01,637 --> 00:06:03,597 ♪ Sexy ferret, sexy ferret 122 00:06:03,604 --> 00:06:05,574 ♪ Sexy ferret, sexy ferret 123 00:06:05,572 --> 00:06:07,572 ♪ Sexy ferret, sexy ferret 124 00:06:07,574 --> 00:06:09,584 ♪ Sexy ferret, sexy ferret 125 00:06:09,576 --> 00:06:11,536 ♪ Sexy ferret, sexy ferret 126 00:06:11,543 --> 00:06:13,613 ♪ Sexy ferret, sexy ferret 127 00:06:13,614 --> 00:06:16,104 ♪ Sexy ferret 128 00:06:18,723 --> 00:06:20,483 - Is my next patient here yet? 129 00:06:20,483 --> 00:06:21,383 - No. 130 00:06:21,381 --> 00:06:22,281 - Is Iggy here? 131 00:06:22,278 --> 00:06:23,308 - Who? 132 00:06:23,313 --> 00:06:25,013 - The metrosexual hunchback! 133 00:06:25,005 --> 00:06:27,075 You've met him a thousand times already! 134 00:06:27,076 --> 00:06:29,176 - You mean the gross guy with the fucked up face 135 00:06:29,181 --> 00:06:30,981 who thinks he's prettier than me? 136 00:06:30,976 --> 00:06:33,496 - Yes, has he come in yet? 137 00:06:33,496 --> 00:06:34,766 - Well lets see. 138 00:06:34,773 --> 00:06:36,433 He told me to forget that he was leaving 139 00:06:36,430 --> 00:06:38,090 with a girl's head and a TV set, 140 00:06:38,087 --> 00:06:38,847 [Doctor Sado sighing deeply] 141 00:06:38,846 --> 00:06:40,396 and then mentioned something 142 00:06:40,434 --> 00:06:41,234 about a romantic walk on the beach. 143 00:06:41,228 --> 00:06:42,638 [soothing beach music] 144 00:06:42,643 --> 00:06:44,513 [waves crashing] 145 00:06:44,507 --> 00:06:47,437 [sea birds crying] 146 00:06:54,759 --> 00:06:56,209 But then he told me that he was doing 147 00:06:56,208 --> 00:06:58,208 some important test that you told him to do 148 00:06:58,210 --> 00:07:00,490 that requires him to be outside of the office. 149 00:07:00,489 --> 00:07:01,489 [growling angrily] 150 00:07:01,490 --> 00:07:02,840 - That deformed abomination. 151 00:07:02,836 --> 00:07:04,106 This is the thanks I get 152 00:07:04,113 --> 00:07:05,873 for letting him keep his stupid pet head! 153 00:07:05,873 --> 00:07:07,533 - Oh, and Temptress told me to tell you 154 00:07:07,530 --> 00:07:08,980 that she was at The SkratchBarr. 155 00:07:08,980 --> 00:07:09,710 [surprised shriek] 156 00:07:09,843 --> 00:07:11,093 I mean, she told me not to tell you 157 00:07:11,154 --> 00:07:12,224 that she was at The SkratchBarr. 158 00:07:12,224 --> 00:07:13,954 Well, one of those. 159 00:07:13,950 --> 00:07:15,470 [Doctor Sado sighing] 160 00:07:15,469 --> 00:07:17,779 - My beautiful Temptress, getting her back clawed 161 00:07:17,782 --> 00:07:20,922 by those lascivious men down at The SkratchBarr. 162 00:07:20,923 --> 00:07:21,963 I will not have it! 163 00:07:21,958 --> 00:07:24,058 It make my blood boil! 164 00:07:24,064 --> 00:07:27,524 - But wait, what do I do with that weird guy in your office? 165 00:07:27,516 --> 00:07:29,376 - What the hell? 166 00:07:29,379 --> 00:07:31,589 Have you been eating the lead paint again? 167 00:07:31,589 --> 00:07:33,899 If you weren't the best friend of Temptress, 168 00:07:33,901 --> 00:07:36,491 I swear I'd have you drawn and quartered! 169 00:07:36,490 --> 00:07:38,460 I thought you said my next patient wasn't here yet! 170 00:07:38,458 --> 00:07:41,078 - But he's not in here, he's in there! 171 00:07:42,289 --> 00:07:45,779 - Trixie, you paid too much for that lobotomy. 172 00:07:49,607 --> 00:07:51,637 - And I didn't get no lobotomies. 173 00:07:51,643 --> 00:07:53,303 - Don't give me no lip! 174 00:07:53,300 --> 00:07:55,300 [door creaking loudly] 175 00:07:55,302 --> 00:07:58,062 I'm sorry I'm late, Mister Knapp. 176 00:07:58,995 --> 00:08:01,475 Good help is so hard to find. 177 00:08:01,481 --> 00:08:02,551 - I've been sitting here forever! 178 00:08:02,551 --> 00:08:03,481 And what the hell is that? 179 00:08:03,483 --> 00:08:04,623 [dramatic music] 180 00:08:04,622 --> 00:08:07,382 - That is an ordinary floor lamp. 181 00:08:07,383 --> 00:08:08,353 - But that floor lamp has been 182 00:08:08,349 --> 00:08:09,969 hitting on me this entire time. 183 00:08:09,972 --> 00:08:14,362 - That's absurd, this floor lamp is 100% subjugated. 184 00:08:14,355 --> 00:08:17,635 It would be impossible for him to break his conditioning. 185 00:08:17,635 --> 00:08:18,805 Isn't that right, lamp? 186 00:08:18,808 --> 00:08:20,638 - [Floor Lamp] Yes, Mistress. 187 00:08:20,638 --> 00:08:25,608 I'm just an ordinary floor lamp and I am so turned on. 188 00:08:26,506 --> 00:08:28,056 - See, you're imagining things, 189 00:08:28,059 --> 00:08:30,269 and that's why you're here, right? 190 00:08:30,268 --> 00:08:33,238 So stop fraternizing with my furniture 191 00:08:33,236 --> 00:08:35,516 and let's get down to the brass tacks! 192 00:08:35,515 --> 00:08:37,755 - Okay, I guess I've been really stressed out. 193 00:08:37,758 --> 00:08:39,548 - When you called me yesterday, 194 00:08:39,553 --> 00:08:42,593 you said you were suffering from night visions? 195 00:08:42,591 --> 00:08:44,111 - Well, I didn't want to say anything on the phone 196 00:08:44,109 --> 00:08:45,419 because it's way more serious than that, 197 00:08:45,421 --> 00:08:46,731 but either I'm going insane 198 00:08:46,733 --> 00:08:47,673 or this thing from my nightmares 199 00:08:47,665 --> 00:08:48,935 is actually trying to kill me. 200 00:08:48,942 --> 00:08:51,222 - Don't get your panties all in a bunch. 201 00:08:51,220 --> 00:08:55,090 Let's start by evaluating your sleep schedule. 202 00:08:55,086 --> 00:08:56,776 - In the day, I'm always on auditions, 203 00:08:56,777 --> 00:08:58,297 and at night I work at a bookstore, 204 00:08:58,296 --> 00:09:00,776 so I guess you can say my circadian rhythm's outta sync. 205 00:09:00,781 --> 00:09:03,091 - A book shop at night, eh? 206 00:09:03,094 --> 00:09:06,374 - The Porno Chateau, that's where I saw your ad. 207 00:09:06,373 --> 00:09:10,243 - So, what kind of auditions are keeping you up? 208 00:09:10,239 --> 00:09:11,169 [laughing devilishly] 209 00:09:11,171 --> 00:09:12,481 - I'm an erotic porn star. 210 00:09:12,482 --> 00:09:14,112 I'm a classic leading man, like Johnny Depp. 211 00:09:14,105 --> 00:09:15,655 Look out world, here I come! 212 00:09:15,658 --> 00:09:17,868 Show me that spotlight, show me the drama! 213 00:09:17,867 --> 00:09:19,867 Turn to the left, turn to the right! 214 00:09:19,869 --> 00:09:21,869 You can't stop me, give me that paparazzi! 215 00:09:21,871 --> 00:09:23,871 Look at this face, look at this talent! 216 00:09:23,873 --> 00:09:25,503 - Dial it down, De Niro! 217 00:09:25,495 --> 00:09:26,695 - Okay, I'm sorry. 218 00:09:26,704 --> 00:09:27,984 I've been drinking a lot of cappuccinos lately 219 00:09:27,981 --> 00:09:29,501 because I've been trying to stay awake. 220 00:09:29,499 --> 00:09:31,019 Every time I fall asleep, I have these nightmares. 221 00:09:31,018 --> 00:09:33,368 There's this ugly woman that's trying to kill me. 222 00:09:33,365 --> 00:09:37,395 She's got a long face and creepy long nails. 223 00:09:37,404 --> 00:09:40,554 She once told me her name was Frida K-Hole. 224 00:09:40,545 --> 00:09:42,125 [dramatic organ music] 225 00:09:42,133 --> 00:09:45,143 She keeps taunting me and tells me horrible dad jokes. 226 00:09:45,136 --> 00:09:46,826 But the worse part is when she gets close to me, 227 00:09:46,827 --> 00:09:49,827 she actually cuts me and I wake up with actual wounds, see? 228 00:09:49,830 --> 00:09:52,350 - Sleep-related hallucinations 229 00:09:52,350 --> 00:09:55,630 are imagined events that feel very real. 230 00:09:55,629 --> 00:09:59,219 But I assure you, they are merely manifestations 231 00:09:59,219 --> 00:10:03,639 of your dream anxiety disorder, or DAD. 232 00:10:03,637 --> 00:10:05,917 And those gashes on your arm, 233 00:10:05,915 --> 00:10:08,255 you've heard of sleep walkers, 234 00:10:08,262 --> 00:10:13,232 well you, my dear, are a sleep cutter, a very serious case. 235 00:10:13,233 --> 00:10:14,343 - No, I'm not a cutter! 236 00:10:14,337 --> 00:10:15,677 If I go to sleep, she's gonna kill me. 237 00:10:15,684 --> 00:10:17,444 - Stop being hysterical. 238 00:10:17,513 --> 00:10:21,453 I can cure you right now using waking dream therapy. 239 00:10:21,448 --> 00:10:26,448 I simply aid you to fall into a state of waking dream, 240 00:10:26,798 --> 00:10:31,728 and then I use guided imagery to deeply explore your psyche. 241 00:10:31,734 --> 00:10:35,154 Together, we can conquer these shadowy fears. 242 00:10:38,189 --> 00:10:43,089 All you have to do is empty your mind and concentrate. 243 00:10:43,332 --> 00:10:45,302 Just relax. 244 00:10:45,299 --> 00:10:50,029 Watch the thingy go back and forth, and back and forth. 245 00:10:51,271 --> 00:10:52,101 - I can't do this! 246 00:10:52,203 --> 00:10:53,313 If I fall asleep, she's gonna kill me! 247 00:10:53,376 --> 00:10:55,236 - Don't be such a worry wart, all right? 248 00:10:55,344 --> 00:10:57,764 Just relax, 'kay? 249 00:10:58,692 --> 00:11:02,662 Back and forth, back and forth. 250 00:11:02,662 --> 00:11:05,702 Think about pleasant memories of your childhood, 251 00:11:05,699 --> 00:11:07,179 like Christmas morning. 252 00:11:08,633 --> 00:11:11,533 - I hate Christmas, I never got the cha cha heels I wanted! 253 00:11:11,532 --> 00:11:12,712 [crying sadly] 254 00:11:12,706 --> 00:11:15,186 - Listen, just trust me, all right? 255 00:11:15,191 --> 00:11:18,301 I'll be behind you the whole time. 256 00:11:19,471 --> 00:11:21,471 - I can't do this, it's never gonna work. 257 00:11:21,473 --> 00:11:23,173 [frying pan ringing] 258 00:11:23,165 --> 00:11:25,545 - And into the fire! 259 00:11:25,546 --> 00:11:27,166 [laughing maniacally] 260 00:11:27,169 --> 00:11:30,899 [electronic reverberation] 261 00:11:30,897 --> 00:11:33,547 [ominous music] 262 00:11:41,597 --> 00:11:45,497 - Oh my God, this is beautiful, so much cake! 263 00:11:45,497 --> 00:11:48,537 This is my most favorite food in the entire world. 264 00:11:49,743 --> 00:11:50,683 Whoa! 265 00:11:52,677 --> 00:11:55,987 Well, I guess I can cheat on my paleo diet this one time. 266 00:11:55,991 --> 00:11:57,231 - [Cake Monster] Don't you know, 267 00:11:57,233 --> 00:11:59,063 processed sugar will kill ya! 268 00:11:59,063 --> 00:12:00,483 [surprised gasp] 269 00:12:00,478 --> 00:12:01,648 [laughing mockingly] 270 00:12:01,651 --> 00:12:03,791 - Oh no, I'm in the dreamland! 271 00:12:03,792 --> 00:12:05,482 This totally sucks! 272 00:12:05,483 --> 00:12:07,003 Doctor Sado, aren't you supposed to be here 273 00:12:07,002 --> 00:12:08,622 to guide me or something? 274 00:12:08,624 --> 00:12:11,394 - [Frida] I'll be your tour guide, bitch! 275 00:12:11,385 --> 00:12:14,865 [corrupted evil laughing] 276 00:12:19,497 --> 00:12:21,637 - [Knapp] Please, Doctor Sado, where are you? 277 00:12:21,637 --> 00:12:25,327 - [Frida] I'm here to make your Hollywood dreams come true! 278 00:12:25,330 --> 00:12:29,440 All the best actors become more famous after they die! 279 00:12:29,438 --> 00:12:32,918 - [Knapp] Doctor Sado, get me outta here! 280 00:12:32,924 --> 00:12:34,684 Doctor Sado! 281 00:12:35,513 --> 00:12:37,003 Help me, Doctor Sado! 282 00:12:38,033 --> 00:12:40,623 Help, where am I? 283 00:12:40,621 --> 00:12:42,871 - Mister Knapp, you need to stop running 284 00:12:42,865 --> 00:12:44,375 and stand up to your fears. 285 00:12:44,384 --> 00:12:46,774 - [Knapp] She's right behind me, she's gonna kill me! 286 00:12:46,766 --> 00:12:50,416 - You can run, but your big ass can't hide! 287 00:12:51,978 --> 00:12:54,118 - There's a hidden door to your right. 288 00:12:54,118 --> 00:12:55,118 Take it! 289 00:12:55,119 --> 00:12:56,529 - [Mr. Knapp] I see the door! 290 00:12:56,534 --> 00:12:58,164 Here I go! 291 00:12:58,156 --> 00:13:00,326 - Okay, I bought you some time. 292 00:13:00,331 --> 00:13:01,951 Take this moment to empower yourself, 293 00:13:01,953 --> 00:13:04,303 so we can face freedom. 294 00:13:04,300 --> 00:13:06,440 - But Frida's a monster, how am I supposed to defeat her? 295 00:13:06,440 --> 00:13:08,890 - Lets fight fire with fire, eh? 296 00:13:08,891 --> 00:13:10,411 You're an actor, right? 297 00:13:10,410 --> 00:13:14,860 Become your own super monster, it will be your finest role. 298 00:13:14,863 --> 00:13:16,313 - What kind of super monster? 299 00:13:16,312 --> 00:13:19,142 - Well, what's your favorite Hollywood monster? 300 00:13:19,143 --> 00:13:20,633 - Well, I've always liked the classics. 301 00:13:20,627 --> 00:13:23,977 - Good, now pick one and give it your best qualities. 302 00:13:23,975 --> 00:13:26,075 What makes you so special? 303 00:13:26,081 --> 00:13:28,951 What's going to make you the next mega celebrity? 304 00:13:28,946 --> 00:13:31,806 - Well, I am the most fabulous person I know. 305 00:13:31,811 --> 00:13:34,611 - Now be the most fabulous monster. 306 00:13:34,606 --> 00:13:38,886 You can do it, just concentrate and visualize! 307 00:13:38,887 --> 00:13:39,817 [breathing deeply] 308 00:13:39,819 --> 00:13:42,059 - I'm fierce, I'm fabulous. 309 00:13:42,062 --> 00:13:44,412 I'm fierce, I'm fabulous! 310 00:13:44,409 --> 00:13:46,649 I'm fierce, I'm fabulous! 311 00:13:46,653 --> 00:13:48,763 I'm fierce, I'm fabulous! 312 00:13:48,758 --> 00:13:49,588 [dolphin vocalizing] 313 00:13:49,587 --> 00:13:51,067 [high-pitched whine] 314 00:13:51,071 --> 00:13:53,831 I'm Fagenstein, I'm Fagenstein, I'm Fagenstein. 315 00:13:53,833 --> 00:13:56,253 I'm Fagenstein. 316 00:13:56,249 --> 00:13:58,179 ["Body Bag Bondage" by Despite Loyalty] 317 00:13:58,182 --> 00:13:59,532 Look at these fabulous frocks, 318 00:13:59,528 --> 00:14:02,078 these juicy lips, this shiny bling. 319 00:14:02,082 --> 00:14:04,432 I'm the fabulous green dream machine. 320 00:14:04,429 --> 00:14:07,019 - I think you're ready to fight back. 321 00:14:08,054 --> 00:14:12,094 [electronic crackling] 322 00:14:12,092 --> 00:14:13,682 [crowd yelling and cheering] 323 00:14:13,680 --> 00:14:17,480 - And now, the dream fight you all been waiting for. 324 00:14:19,272 --> 00:14:22,762 In this corner, from the depths of hell, 325 00:14:22,758 --> 00:14:25,108 with razor claws of humiliation, 326 00:14:25,105 --> 00:14:28,755 the demoness of nightmares, the mother that takes, 327 00:14:28,764 --> 00:14:33,424 she will tear you to shreds while reading your threads, 328 00:14:33,424 --> 00:14:37,464 the dream queen of the year and the defending champion 329 00:14:37,462 --> 00:14:41,952 who is always ready to cut a bitch, Frida K-Hole! 330 00:14:41,950 --> 00:14:43,680 [crowd clapping] 331 00:14:43,675 --> 00:14:45,185 [Frida snarling] 332 00:14:45,194 --> 00:14:48,304 And in this corner, from the gutters of Hollywood, 333 00:14:48,301 --> 00:14:51,301 wearing red thigh-high hooker boots, 334 00:14:51,304 --> 00:14:53,444 looking like the love child 335 00:14:53,444 --> 00:14:57,244 of the Green Giant and the Great Gazoo, 336 00:14:57,241 --> 00:15:00,831 a sassy cashier from the Porno Chateau, 337 00:15:00,830 --> 00:15:04,520 and a wannabe actor who only do little bit parts 338 00:15:04,524 --> 00:15:07,534 in crappy YouTube videos, Fagenstein. 339 00:15:07,527 --> 00:15:08,387 [Doctor Sado clapping] 340 00:15:08,390 --> 00:15:09,490 [crickets chirping] 341 00:15:09,494 --> 00:15:10,704 - [clearing throat] Boo. 342 00:15:12,187 --> 00:15:14,707 - Doctor Sado, Doctor Sado, did you hear the announcer? 343 00:15:14,706 --> 00:15:17,046 Frida's a freakin' demon from the depths of hell. 344 00:15:17,054 --> 00:15:19,234 Maybe those YouTube videos are pretty crappy. 345 00:15:19,228 --> 00:15:21,228 I'm a loser, I just can't do this. 346 00:15:21,230 --> 00:15:23,850 - Listen, stupid, fear is the mind killer, okay? 347 00:15:23,853 --> 00:15:26,653 Remember who you are, remember about your powers. 348 00:15:26,649 --> 00:15:28,409 You're fierce, you're fabulous. 349 00:15:28,410 --> 00:15:30,310 Now I want you to get in there 350 00:15:30,308 --> 00:15:35,308 and send that two-bit, ugly, no-talent ho scumbag 351 00:15:35,348 --> 00:15:37,248 down to hell where she belongs! 352 00:15:37,246 --> 00:15:38,556 [upbeat funky music] 353 00:15:38,558 --> 00:15:39,968 [fight bell ringing] 354 00:15:39,973 --> 00:15:42,703 [crowd cheering] 355 00:15:43,873 --> 00:15:46,323 [Frida growling menacingly] 356 00:15:46,324 --> 00:15:49,364 - Well, I see you got a shitty little makeover. 357 00:15:49,362 --> 00:15:51,052 I bet you feel fresh and expensive. 358 00:15:51,053 --> 00:15:54,923 But really, you're fresh out of the 99-cent store. 359 00:15:54,919 --> 00:15:55,989 You're so pathetic. 360 00:15:55,989 --> 00:15:58,649 You're a joke, you deserve your own laugh track. 361 00:15:58,681 --> 00:16:00,651 [Frida and crowd laughing] 362 00:16:00,649 --> 00:16:01,929 [Frida growling] 363 00:16:01,926 --> 00:16:03,306 - Fear is in the mind of the killer. 364 00:16:03,307 --> 00:16:05,267 You're just a manifestation of my self-doubt. 365 00:16:05,274 --> 00:16:06,074 You're not real. 366 00:16:09,140 --> 00:16:11,000 Shut your K-Hole, you stupid bitch! 367 00:16:11,004 --> 00:16:12,284 [Frida gasping in surprise] 368 00:16:12,281 --> 00:16:13,351 [fight bell ringing] Damn, that felt good! 369 00:16:13,489 --> 00:16:14,969 [crowd jeering and booing] 370 00:16:14,974 --> 00:16:18,084 - Ugh, that stupid little dick head! 371 00:16:18,080 --> 00:16:21,700 I don't get where she gets all this confidence from. 372 00:16:21,704 --> 00:16:24,504 I've been whittling down his soul for weeks! 373 00:16:24,500 --> 00:16:25,850 It was in the bag! 374 00:16:26,364 --> 00:16:28,924 - Aw, poor baby get a spankin'? 375 00:16:28,918 --> 00:16:30,368 Get it together, Petunia! 376 00:16:30,368 --> 00:16:33,848 You're giving us demon queens a bad name. 377 00:16:33,854 --> 00:16:36,444 You know his confidence is tomfoolery. 378 00:16:36,443 --> 00:16:41,003 Can't you tell, or have you lost your black magic touch? 379 00:16:42,587 --> 00:16:44,177 - I haven't lost anything. 380 00:16:45,452 --> 00:16:49,562 That rat sucking, sniveling worm slapped me! 381 00:16:49,560 --> 00:16:51,630 I'm still the baddest demon around! 382 00:16:53,288 --> 00:16:56,218 I've been toying with him long enough, 383 00:16:56,222 --> 00:16:58,502 it's time to put the final nail in the coffin. 384 00:16:59,742 --> 00:17:02,372 Time to pull the curtain on her final-- 385 00:17:02,366 --> 00:17:04,086 - Mm-hmm, all right, we get it. 386 00:17:04,092 --> 00:17:05,542 Now, go out there and show 387 00:17:05,541 --> 00:17:09,271 that little Stinkenstein who's boss. 388 00:17:09,269 --> 00:17:10,619 - Okay. 389 00:17:10,615 --> 00:17:12,025 Butterfly kisses? 390 00:17:14,343 --> 00:17:15,413 Okay! 391 00:17:15,413 --> 00:17:18,523 [upbeat funky music] 392 00:17:20,453 --> 00:17:21,903 [fight bell ringing] 393 00:17:21,902 --> 00:17:23,972 - Want some more of this? 394 00:17:23,973 --> 00:17:26,913 I float like a vampire bat, I sting like a bitch! 395 00:17:26,907 --> 00:17:30,287 [Frida laughs mockingly] 396 00:17:31,429 --> 00:17:32,259 [Fagenstein grunting] 397 00:17:32,258 --> 00:17:33,738 [Frida laughing] 398 00:17:33,742 --> 00:17:35,402 [Fagenstein screaming in pain] 399 00:17:35,399 --> 00:17:37,089 - Welcome to prime time, bitch! 400 00:17:37,090 --> 00:17:39,580 Now is your moment to shine. 401 00:17:39,575 --> 00:17:41,225 I'm gonna make you a star. 402 00:17:41,232 --> 00:17:43,682 [Frida grunting] 403 00:17:43,683 --> 00:17:44,753 [Fagenstein gasping painfully] 404 00:17:44,753 --> 00:17:46,243 [fight bell ringing] 405 00:17:46,237 --> 00:17:47,757 - What's happening? 406 00:17:47,756 --> 00:17:49,646 You said all I have to do is have self-confidence, 407 00:17:49,654 --> 00:17:51,244 and now I'm fucking dying! 408 00:17:51,242 --> 00:17:52,932 - Calm your tits, you're not going to die 409 00:17:52,933 --> 00:17:55,183 from those tiny little scratches. 410 00:17:55,177 --> 00:17:58,457 Acting confident is different from being confident. 411 00:17:58,456 --> 00:18:00,076 As long as you believe in yourself, 412 00:18:00,079 --> 00:18:01,839 she could never hurt you. 413 00:18:01,839 --> 00:18:04,319 Her words are just a mirage, 414 00:18:04,324 --> 00:18:06,674 and you giving her all the power. 415 00:18:06,671 --> 00:18:09,501 Don't buy into what she be saying, huh? 416 00:18:09,502 --> 00:18:11,682 - But I'm bleeding and it hurts! 417 00:18:11,676 --> 00:18:13,846 No one can get self-confidence outta nowhere. 418 00:18:13,851 --> 00:18:16,471 - But that's the way they did it in the '80s movies. 419 00:18:16,474 --> 00:18:17,864 Wait a minute! 420 00:18:17,855 --> 00:18:19,165 This will pump you up. 421 00:18:19,167 --> 00:18:20,097 Maestro! 422 00:18:20,099 --> 00:18:21,759 ["Warrior" by Val Killmore] 423 00:18:21,755 --> 00:18:24,755 [upbeat rock music] 424 00:18:46,884 --> 00:18:51,854 ♪ Caught in a turn as my mind fades away ♪ 425 00:18:52,752 --> 00:18:57,762 ♪ I feel the after strain 426 00:18:59,034 --> 00:19:04,004 ♪ Got to get ready for everyone ♪ 427 00:19:05,178 --> 00:19:10,148 ♪ I'll have to go it on my own 428 00:19:11,564 --> 00:19:16,194 ♪ From being hip now, chance to being petrified ♪ 429 00:19:17,639 --> 00:19:22,509 ♪ There so body and mind, hard and calcified ♪ 430 00:19:23,645 --> 00:19:26,675 ♪ And I can't sleep at night 431 00:19:26,682 --> 00:19:29,692 ♪ Turns up in demon eyes 432 00:19:29,685 --> 00:19:32,025 ♪ I'll go waste away 433 00:19:32,032 --> 00:19:36,072 ♪ It'll be the prime of my life ♪ 434 00:19:36,071 --> 00:19:41,041 ♪ I'm bathing in the midnight moon 'cause I'm a warrior ♪ 435 00:19:42,595 --> 00:19:47,145 ♪ I'm driven by the smell of blood 'cause I'm a warrior ♪ 436 00:19:48,601 --> 00:19:53,191 ♪ Not swayed by the fear of God 'cause I'm a warrior ♪ 437 00:19:54,710 --> 00:19:59,300 ♪ Dancing on the highest mountain, I'm a warrior ♪ 438 00:20:03,167 --> 00:20:05,647 ♪ I'm a warrior 439 00:20:05,652 --> 00:20:09,072 ♪ Warrior 440 00:20:09,069 --> 00:20:11,659 ♪ I'm a warrior 441 00:20:11,658 --> 00:20:15,178 ♪ Warrior 442 00:20:15,179 --> 00:20:17,839 ♪ I'm a warrior 443 00:20:17,837 --> 00:20:18,667 ♪ Warrior 444 00:20:18,665 --> 00:20:19,525 [electric zapping] 445 00:20:19,528 --> 00:20:20,528 [electric zapping] 446 00:20:20,529 --> 00:20:21,529 [electric zapping] 447 00:20:21,530 --> 00:20:23,530 ♪ I'm a warrior 448 00:20:23,532 --> 00:20:24,842 [electricity crackling] 449 00:20:24,844 --> 00:20:27,364 [crowd yelling and cheering] 450 00:20:27,364 --> 00:20:28,544 [fight bell ringing] 451 00:20:28,537 --> 00:20:29,367 [electricity crackling] 452 00:20:29,366 --> 00:20:31,326 - Let the fisting begin! 453 00:20:32,852 --> 00:20:36,202 [Frida grunting loudly] 454 00:20:39,583 --> 00:20:40,933 [Frida grunting in pain] 455 00:20:40,929 --> 00:20:42,899 Damn, you're one ugly bitch! 456 00:20:42,896 --> 00:20:43,786 - Thank you. 457 00:20:43,794 --> 00:20:44,804 [Frida screaming] 458 00:20:44,795 --> 00:20:46,305 [high-pitched whine] 459 00:20:46,314 --> 00:20:49,114 [Frida screaming] 460 00:20:50,697 --> 00:20:51,767 [loud crashing] 461 00:20:51,767 --> 00:20:53,217 [loud clanging] 462 00:20:53,217 --> 00:20:54,457 [fight bell ringing] 463 00:20:54,460 --> 00:20:56,320 - I did it, I did it, Doctor Sado! 464 00:20:56,324 --> 00:20:57,604 [crowd cheering] 465 00:20:57,601 --> 00:20:58,951 I can't wait to wake up and be the warrior! 466 00:20:58,947 --> 00:21:03,117 I'm gonna conquer the mother fuckin' world! 467 00:21:03,123 --> 00:21:04,823 [electronic reverberation] 468 00:21:04,815 --> 00:21:05,815 [Knapp gasping] 469 00:21:05,816 --> 00:21:07,296 Oh my God, that was so intense! 470 00:21:07,300 --> 00:21:08,580 What an amazing experience! 471 00:21:08,577 --> 00:21:10,577 Doctor Sado, your dream therapy cured me, 472 00:21:10,579 --> 00:21:12,579 now I can take Hollywood by storm! 473 00:21:12,581 --> 00:21:13,931 [Knapp grunting in pain] 474 00:21:13,927 --> 00:21:16,067 Ow, my tummy, why does it sting? 475 00:21:16,067 --> 00:21:17,347 [Knapp screaming in pain] 476 00:21:17,345 --> 00:21:19,825 Holy fuck, it wasn't just a nightmare! 477 00:21:19,830 --> 00:21:21,350 It was all real! 478 00:21:21,349 --> 00:21:22,969 The stakes were high! 479 00:21:22,971 --> 00:21:25,041 I could have actually died! 480 00:21:25,042 --> 00:21:27,222 But I didn't, I defeated the demon! 481 00:21:27,216 --> 00:21:28,976 - Don't be stupid, stupid. 482 00:21:28,977 --> 00:21:31,357 There's no such thing as demons. 483 00:21:31,359 --> 00:21:33,359 It really was a nightmare. 484 00:21:33,361 --> 00:21:37,331 But don't worry, I'll make sure you never have one again. 485 00:21:37,330 --> 00:21:38,540 [suspenseful music] 486 00:21:38,538 --> 00:21:41,648 [Doctor Sado screaming viciously] 487 00:21:42,922 --> 00:21:44,162 [tense techno music] 488 00:21:44,164 --> 00:21:45,864 - [Voiceover] Stay tuned for more horrific 489 00:21:45,856 --> 00:21:48,376 and perverted adventures of Doctor Sado 490 00:21:48,376 --> 00:21:51,896 and her obscene cabal in Sado Psychiatrist! 491 00:21:53,208 --> 00:21:56,178 [maniacal laughing] 492 00:21:57,212 --> 00:22:00,282 [tense techno music] 35336

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